Subscribe at Patreon.com/miniondeathcult for a premium episode every Monday & access to all past premium episodes. - This week the Cult takes on the caravan of asylum-seekers and the YouTube shooter Nasim Aghdam: - “Logic is a forbidden tool of the patriarchy" - “Who guards the National Guard?" - "I want to help fight migrants but I can't do anything physical or lift anything." - And "YouTube deserved to be shot because they stole my free speech."
| Time | Text |
|---|---|
| I still think we can make millions of dollars with scented... scented microphone covers. | |
| I just think it's the way to the future. | |
| Maybe you should just stop breathing on it so much. | |
| Or we could dip these things in something. | |
| Dip the spit guards in something. | |
| Definitely not a spit guard. | |
| These aren't spit guards? | |
| No. | |
| Oh, this is the spit guard. | |
| They're pop filters. | |
| Spit guards are just like natural human decency. | |
| Whatever, I'll spit on this thing anyway. | |
| And it'll probably guard the microphone from my spit, so. | |
| More likely it'll absorb the spit and Tony will be complaining about the smell the next time he uses it. | |
| They don't smell bad, they don't smell like anything. | |
| Tony, your microphone smells so weird, dude. | |
| I'm just letting you know. | |
| Whoa, where'd you get that book? | |
| A week ago, two weeks ago, I was going to send it back because it's got a little tear on one of the edges and then I was like, nah, it's too much of a hassle, it's fine. | |
| I'm going to J.O. | |
| to it later. | |
| Okay, cool. | |
| Yeah, just make sure you use the spit guard. | |
| The liberals are destroying California, and conservative humor gone awry... conservative humor gone awry is going to fascist-fornia today. | |
| So stay tuned, we're going to take a few pictures of the desert and how their policies are actually messing it up. | |
| It's not beautiful when you go across that border. | |
| Stay tuned guys, we'll show you exactly what it looks like when you're going to destroy the desert. | |
| Follow their environmental stars. | |
| Stay tuned. | |
| I'm naming this episode Planet Caravan, just so you guys know. | |
| With it. | |
| Sounds good. | |
| Because caravans are a good thing. | |
| They're a good thing when Black Sabbath sings about them. | |
| They're a good thing when they bring migrants to countries who can afford to help them. | |
| Yeah, and they're a weird thing when a bunch of people want to assemble and go on a caravan to the border to meet the caravan coming up. | |
| Oh, that is kind of like the Dark Caravan is the group of militiamen headed there. | |
| That's the Dark Spirit Caravan. | |
| Man, the Dark Carnival is so much cooler than the Dark Caravan. | |
| Facts. | |
| I'm Alexander Edward. | |
| I'm Mountain Matt. | |
| And I'm Tony Boswell. | |
| And we are Minion Death Cult. | |
| Yeah! | |
| The world is ending. | |
| Desperately poor migrants are responsible. | |
| And we're documenting it. | |
| This week we have a super fun show about virulent racism. | |
| Virulent state-sanctioned racism that is likely going to end in the deaths of brown people. | |
| And we'll also be talking about the right-wing reaction to the YouTube shooting that happened a week or two ago, which of course was measured and cognizant of the The human lives at stake and was not at all based in grievance toward YouTube or liberals in general or vegans or David Hogg who's also part of every conversation now? | |
| Yeah. | |
| So that's what we're going to be talking about today. | |
| We're going to lead things off with the right-wing reaction to this caravan of about a thousand people looking for asylum in the U.S. | |
| And of course we cannot allow that to happen. | |
| So I'm going to let Matt over here lead that segment. | |
| Um, you think that the right wing likes David Hogg so much because they want to have some sex with him? | |
| I think they like David Hogg so much because at least he's not vegan with a last name like that. | |
| Right, they probably think, oh, David Hogg, he's probably got a big hog, probably likes some hog. | |
| Yeah, they're all definitely bottoms and that's what they look for in a homosexual partner is a big ass dick. | |
| Yeah. | |
| Well, um, this National Guard thing is kinda weird and, um... Well, we haven't even said what the National Guard thing is, I don't think. | |
| Oh, yeah. | |
| Oh, yeah. | |
| So, like, Trump, uh, signed a proclamation where he's like, hey, we're gonna send the National Guard down to, uh... | |
| Yeah, New Mexico and California probably wouldn't fuck around with that stuff. | |
| Several states have declined to send anybody. | |
| I believe. | |
| Okay. | |
| They've each committed, you know, hundreds of, uh, reservists. | |
| Yeah. | |
| New Mexico and California probably wouldn't fuck around with that stuff. | |
| But, um, several States have declined to send anybody. | |
| We'll see what happens. | |
| So, um, he's sending people down there, which is like not unheard of. | |
| Or he's sending National Guard down there, which is, like, not unheard of. | |
| It's happened in, like, our lifetime, these three of us here. | |
| Obama did it. | |
| Obama, I'm pretty sure. | |
| Bush did it, too. | |
| Whatever. | |
| It's like a grand gesture, basically. | |
| Yeah, it's just like the wall. | |
| It's just a racist gesture that does nothing but gin up his racist base. | |
| It has no real effect on immigration, which is down. | |
| Yeah. | |
| Just something his fans want to see, you know? | |
| Because he can't get anything practical other than, you know, tax cuts for the wealthy through Congress, and he can't even build the fucking wall. |