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Jan. 13, 2025 - Louder Than Crowder

01:05:59

EPISODE 52: PREMATURE ARBITRATION (AUGUST 10TH, 2018)

This week while Steven is away, the boys celebrate, discussing a lawsuit that just cost Mug Clubbers some cash. Another throwback episode to learn about what things we like for "Not Gay" Jared on his last day employed by LwC. Like what we're doing? Want MORE for FREE? Join the Shrug Club at http://patreon.com/shrugclub Email: louderthancrowder@gmail.com Twitter/X: @thancrowder Music by DJ Danarchy

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Time	Text
	This is an AudioWool original.
	And then the horny emo kids took it over.
	Welcome to Louder Than Crowder.
	We're a podcast about the podcast, Louder, with Crowder.
	My name's Byron, and I'm joined today in studio by Dennis.
	Hey!
	And all the way back in occupied Texas, it's Jared.
	Hey, everybody!
	Was it vacant Texas when he was away?
	It was a little less occupied, is what I said.
	Okay, gotcha, okay.
	Total victory in the Steven Crowder case.
	Big news coming from Matt Bruning, former Louder with Crowder, number two not gay Jared's lawyer.
	A settlement in the frivolous defamation lawsuit Stephen filed against his former co-host, legally known as Jared Metello, remember?
	Yeah.
	We'll be talking through the settlement agreement as well as the lawyer's statement later in the show.
	And although we did spend an entire episode walking through the initial drama surrounding a suffocating NDA basically forced on not gay Jared, That was episode 26, Non-Exposure Agreement.
	I remember trying to decide the title on that one a lot.
	We had lots of puns.
	We bounced a couple back and forth.
	Yeah, we haven't really covered much Jared.
	I mean, the not-gay Jared.
	Jared's always on the show.
	I'm always here, and it's nice to hear from you.
	Yes, yes.
	I thought it might be fun to start at the end.
	Okay.
	A very not-gay Jared farewell.
	August 10th, 2018. It is Not Gay Jared's last episode.
	Producing with me in studio...
	For the last time, we'll talk about this later on, is NotGayJarred.
	You can follow him at NotGayJarred.
	And NotGayJarred, yeah, you can tease.
	You can tease, yeah.
	I have some news I'll be sharing.
	There you go.
	There you go.
	Great announcement.
	Announcing that I'm going to be announcing something.
	Well, they don't stop there.
	So we're going to have a very nice send-off for Jared later and kind of take you down a trip down memory lane.
	But yeah, Not Gay Dad is a big, big part of it.
	That's true.
	And we're going to be passing the torch on to some other people who are going to be helping fill your, what is it, size 4 shoes?
	I don't know.
	Five.
	Five.
	Don't be insulting.
	Oh, we bind feet for you!
	He rounds up.
	Wow!
	Uh-huh.
	He's using a racist accent to make fun of...
	Not gay Jared.
	Yeah, for having small feet.
	What in the world?
	Because he's a small guy.
	But I don't think that, yeah.
	I've never seen his feet, because it's always kind of mid-chest up.
	Check him out on WikiFeet.
	Do you think he's on Celebrity Foot Finder?
	Why don't you look that up while we listen to this next clip here.
	We all know Gerald as the current captain of the Ladder with Crowder ship.
	Yeah.
	But before he was in second chair, he had different responsibilities on the show.
	Okay.
	Gerald, what's the wine of the day?
	Wine of the day is Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end.
	I love that sitcom in the 90s.
	It was good use of puppetry.
	There was a sitcom called?
	Yeah.
	Puppetry.
	Alfie'd be like, well, on my planet, we don't eat shrimp.
	Laugh track.
	Very funny.
	ALF was an acronym for Alien Life Form.
	Yeah, it has nothing to do with Alpha and Omega Wine, which of course is the wine of the day.
	From Bonvino.
	This is when Gerald bought his way on the show with the payment of free advertising for his company.
	So it was pretty new?
	Well, in an official capacity, because remember last week, we talked about it a decade ago, when Gerald...
	And a presence on the show.
	Oh yeah, he had the interview and they talked about Jesus a lot.
	Jesus Christ, yes.
	Praise be to he.
	Wow, it feels very dorky.
	Yeah.
	It doesn't feel, it is.
	To surge here, folks, that we haven't really talked about at all.
	One, I know for sure, has only been referencing his written word.
	Okay.
	This is something we wanted to talk about, and Brodigan, you were passionate about this.
	Phil, have you been following Alexandria Cortez a whole lot?
	Yes, I have been very, very, very diligently trying to figure out what her middle names are.
	For the last ten minutes.
	I haven't gotten quite anywhere else.
	That's about it.
	$3.65 an hour.
	Can we multiply the hours?
	How much money have you spent on figuring this out?
	So, in non-surprising news, according to her, America no longer has the upper middle class.
	I think we have the overlay there, right, Brodigan, of what she said.
	She said there's no more middle class in the United States.
	She's given a couple of interviews lately, but this is actually something more specific where she refers to...
	Again, she's trying to paint a mental picture.
	She's taking the mantle from Bernie Sanders.
	You know he's pissed about that.
	She's going further left than he is, which is crazy.
	Let's see the clip first where she talks about this.
	This upper middle class is probably more moderate, but that upper middle class doesn't exist anymore in America.
	Their heyday was in the 90s when...
	You know, kids had like Furbies and like parents, you had like soccer moms with like two vans and stuff.
	Furbies and two vans.
	Yeah.
	That's a dream.
	That's not America anymore.
	No, that's not America anymore.
	You don't even recognize America if you have true, actual, crazy eyes.
	Yeah.
	Okay.
	So a lot to talk about here.
	Brodigan?
	He's not the editor-in-chief of the website.
	He's actually the Grand Poobah.
	The Grand Poobah?
	The Grand Poobah.
	What does that mean?
	That's just what it says in his bio on the website of this year's website.
	This is chive-coded.
	And enjoys writing words.
	It really is chive-coated.
	Keep coming, Crowderon!
	Oh, no.
	And he enjoys writing words about things.
	Why?
	Because he owes it to the people.
	Of course he does.
	And he is sitting next to half-Asian lawyer Bill Richman, who we all know is Stephen's lawyer, whose primary function was that YouTube case he was mostly focused on.
	He had nothing to do with Stephen's marital situation.
	I have a really hard time with all the people that are in and out of his show.
	I feel like...
	You know how when you go to a band's Wikipedia page, you can go to the members section and it shows a graph of where they leave and return?
	When you finally publish our site, we can have a cast of characters.
	That'd be kind of cool, right?
	Yeah, have the members of the show as they come and go from second and third chair.
	Alexandria...
	What the heck, Cortez?
	What is that name?
	I don't think it's considered a middle name.
	It's a hyphenated last name.
	Yeah, that's her last name.
	It has a hyphen in it.
	Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez.
	Two parents.
	Maybe fairly unfamiliar to them at this point because it was June 26, 2018 that she won the Democratic primary election for New York's 14th Congressional District.
	I like how they also said that Bernie was going to get upset.
	Oh, we're not done talking about that.
	Bernie...
	Bernie doesn't care.
	Bernie just wants to be progressive, man.
	He might be pissed about it.
	Probably really pissed.
	We're going to talk in just a sec.
	Of course, the first thing that Steven notices is physical traits of AOC. She does have big eyes, and he does not let this go.
	I feel like there was an episode that I made you watch, like, years ago, and he was yelling about AOC's big, dear eyes.
	And even the stand-up that...
	Remember when I was at the Spokane show?
	I think he even made reference to AOC's big, googly eyes.
	That's so weird.
	I don't think she has that big eyes.
	Those are normal sized eyes.
	Maybe 110%.
	No, maybe 103. You think?
	Yeah, they're normal.
	They're fine eyes.
	There's nothing wrong with it.
	Either way, big eyes are known as an attractive trait.
	Let me get him on this.
	Is it coded?
	Does he mean something else when he says eyes?
	Wink, wink?
	Is that what he said?
	No, what are you talking about?
	He doesn't find her attractive.
	He does, but he would never say that.
	Oh, yeah.
	Yeah, I don't think that that's what he's getting at.
	It's insane to me on the right how thirsty everyone is for Elsie.
	Oh, they love it and they hate the way she is, but they love the way she looks.
	Yeah, right?
	Oh, gosh.
	The thing is, I think that they, like, get hot for how she is.
	Okay, we don't...
	She just has, like, normal...
	She has normal eyes.
	Okay, normal eyes.
	But we have early AOC takes.
	Well, and actually, you know what?
	Last week, we heard Stephen's vintage Bill Cosby, remember?
	Yes.
	This was a lot of fun.
	I heard that you do actually a very good one, Byron.
	No, actually, I think resounding no from everyone.
	That's okay.
	We have another one.
	Have we ever aired Stephen's Bernie Sanders impression?
	I don't think so.
	You know who's most upset about this is Bernie Sanders.
	Because she's still more attractive than Bernie Sanders.
	Socialism is an aging son of a bitch!
	I mean, can you imagine being him staking out that far left position saying there's no way anybody's going to top this?
	And boom.
	And he has to conceive the territory.
	I'm a cisgender prick!
	The mantle is yours!
	That's just Gilbert Godfrey.
	Yeah, it's Gilbert Godfrey.
	The penguin.
	He's a little bit penguin.
	Is that that guy from Aladdin?
	Yeah, also Gilbert Gottfried.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	No, no, no.
	The parrot.
	What's that guy's name?
	Aladdin's parrot?
	Oh, Iago.
	Iago?
	Yeah, I think so.
	Guys, we're dancing dangerously close to Steven Crowder territory talking about Disney movies.
	Oh, you're right.
	Okay.
	Rest in peace, Gilbert Gottfried.
	And specifically, Aladdin.
	I got a little nervous for us.
	But no, that is the worst Bernie Sanders impression.
	He still does it.
	It's exactly the same.
	He does Gilbert Gottfried for Bernie Sanders.
	I can't figure out why.
	I have no idea.
	They don't look the same?
	No.
	Is Gilbert Gottfried Jewish?
	Yeah.
	Because Bernie Sanders is Jewish.
	Yeah.
	So I could see him being, like, anti-Semitic.
	I have no idea where he's going, but it's definitely, you could hold a gun to my head and say, I'm going to shoot you if you can't name who this person is, and I would just be dead in front of you.
	Well, yeah, it's not close.
	Not even close.
	Also, if Bernie Sanders found out that someone more progressive than him got elected to Congress, he'd be like, finally I can go to bed.
	I can rest my tired body.
	I mean, the weight on that man's shoulders, it's visible.
	Yeah, gosh.
	Poor guy.
	I miss him.
	Heavy on my shoulders.
	Wait, is that Gilbert Godfrey?
	That's not...
	Very heavy on my shoulders!
	I don't know, man.
	I don't know.
	I don't think that worked.
	Brownigan jumps in with an interesting take on Democratic Socialists.
	Anyone?
	The annoying thing is, especially now that Democratic Socialists are basically the left's Tea Party, you're going to see a bunch of these candidates.
	If you've ever been to a bar in New York City and had a conversation with...
	Any of them?
	Alexandria, Nina Pinto, Santa Maria Cortez?
	Smoked her ass.
	She's literally every idiot you'd be like, you know something?
	I'm not drunk enough for you tonight.
	I'm going on.
	And she's going to be in Congress now.
	And then later you find out that she was busted from Burlington.
	Didn't the entire 20th century pretty much put to bed the fact that socialism sucks and kills millions and millions and millions of people?
	Not to bug eyes.
	By the way, let's get into her specific claim.
	She talks about the 90s and the middle class, and now she talks about two veins and Furbies and stuff.
	Today, actually, Americans have it better than the 90s.
	Let's just use her comparison.
	So the average vehicle...
	Furbies suck!
	Furbies didn't suck, first of all.
	I did buy one and then actually returned it.
	You should have kept it and then sold it now.
	I think they still make them.
	But not the old classics, dude.
	They're like the first edition holographic Charizard.
	I had one and it started buzzing.
	Uh-oh.
	It kind of froze up a bit.
	Like a capacitor fried or something?
	Yeah, something.
	And then I couldn't figure out what it was.
	And then I finally had this thought.
	I mean, it's like 3 o'clock in the morning.
	I was like fucking 12. I dig it out of the toy cabinet that it was in, I guess.
	And this thing is just buzzing.
	And I took the fucking...
	Batteries out of it, and it just kept buzzing.
	No!
	It was haunted.
	Yeah, so I threw it.
	It scared me because...
	It was taken by a spirit.
	It landed on its big eyes, and it broke the...
	Like the plastic face off.
	Like the eyelid off.
	Yeah, just like that.
	Like the bottom of it.
	It was still humming, but its eyes were all deranged looking.
	Like AOC, exactly.
	It was so scary.
	Just like her.
	Yeah, awful.
	The 90s were better.
	Than the 2010s.
	Of course they were, yes.
	Of course, yeah.
	Everything was cheaper back then.
	Houses, especially.
	Median home prices increased by 121% nationwide.
	Since then?
	From 1990 to 2022. But medium household income...
	130%?
	121. And medium household income only increased by 29%.
	Nice.
	That's awesome.
	In so many different ways, though.
	As big as the minimum wage going up.
	You think that's it?
	No.
	Okay.
	Never.
	I'm just trying to be conservative.
	Wow.
	Also, I mean...
	Trying to feel him out.
	He presented it like he's like, there's been a study that shows.
	Yeah.
	Sorry, man.
	The 90s were definitely just a better time.
	Like, they...
	Sorry, bud.
	There were problems, for sure.
	The middle class just continues to shrink and shrink and shrink.
	If you wanted to buy a house, I'd much rather do it in 1993 than right now.
	Sorry.
	Yep.
	In 1970, 61% of adults were in the middle class, and by 2021, this has fallen to 50%.
	I would argue that it's even lower than that.
	It's a trend, though.
	Yeah.
	Most certainly.
	Yeah.
	Big difference between socialism and democratic socialism as well, even though there are...
	They just don't care about that.
	No, they don't.
	You know how, like, when people say, we're actually a democratic republic or whatever?
	It's that kind of thing.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, we know.
	We know.
	We know.
	And you should probably know that democratic socialism is different than straight up just classic socialism.
	Well, they're saying...
	The same is what the Nazis did, Dennis, and that's why we don't support it.
	Socialism killed millions of people, and that's what AOC wants to do, is kill...
	She's trying to bring socialism to your country.
	You know what was crazy?
	I feel like...
	We shouldn't fund any programs as a collective group of people.
	We should fund nothing.
	No police.
	No mug clubs.
	No mug clubs.
	No firefighters.
	The firefighters are privatized now anyway, so that's kind of fun, right?
	Hospitals are doing that too.
	If you want roads, build your own roads.
	Where we're going, we don't need roads because it's called Apocalypse Town.
	Get in.
	We're going shopping.
	Another callback to last week.
	We learned that Stephen is kind of a good teacher, right?
	He's a great teacher.
	I wish he taught me everything.
	Yes, everything from...
	Orgy.
	Depravity.
	School.
	To how about...
	Debauchery.
	Yeah, that's right.
	Income inequality.
	I'd love to hear it.
	You want a quick lesson?
	Yeah.
	And here's the thing.
	This is all based on the premise, and she repeats this a lot.
	She repeats it as ad nauseum, just like Bernie Sanders did.
	It's predicated on the concept that...
	Inequality is a plaguing, gigantic, evil, social injustice.
	And it's not.
	We need stronger champions.
	But I don't think that they see exactly how rising income inequality has resulted in a very stark political reality.
	Okay.
	This is one thing we've talked about.
	A lot of people, we've talked about this quite a bit on the show, going back to when we were basically in the AM radio days.
	Yep.
	But we didn't have the ability to do charts.
	No graphics.
	No graphics back then.
	Everything made a lot more sense on audio.
	Yes, it made a lot more sense on audio.
	So we've talked about this.
	When people say, about inequalities, what's wrong with inequality?
	Well, don't you think inequality is wrong?
	No.
	And their brains explode.
	Let me explain to you.
	Inequality in and of itself is not a problem if everyone is doing better.
	People can have greater economic equality and actually be far worse off.
	See Venezuela.
	So let me kind of give you an example.
	Let's say there's a $10 pie.
	Okay?
	There's a $10 pie.
	I own $50.
	You own $50.
	Right?
	We're equal.
	There you go.
	You have perfect equality.
	Now is that better?
	Let's say you go and grow that pie to $500 pie.
	So now I only have 20% of that pie.
	Right?
	I still have 20 times what I had before!
	Even though the inequality gap has widened significantly.
	Where am I better off?
	And most importantly, you have Pi.
	And you do have Pi.
	Who is that?
	That was Brodigan, I think.
	Great Brodigan.
	Honestly, that's probably the best joke I've heard on the show.
	Stephen, I love that he uses Venezuela as an example, and then specifically describes the fact that the dollar of Venezuela was worth nothing.
	Like, their currency was worth nothing.
	In his example, cool, now you have more money on paper, but...
	That money is worth nothing.
	Yes.
	But regardless, income inequality is a substantial problem.
	Well, not if tides...
	The rising tides lift all ships.
	Yes, of course.
	Yeah, yeah, of course.
	And also the trickling down.
	Exactly, yeah, yeah.
	When it rains.
	It's called the...
	The Great Flood.
	The Great Flood.
	That's what it's called.
	Well, what happens when someone gets so much more of that pie, or they have a significant amount of pie, which equals power, which makes the value of the other person's smaller share of the pies go down?
	Yeah.
	The number might change, but the value goes down.
	Yeah.
	Low to moderate income workers are going to continue struggling when wages stagnate and someone else continues to make money.
	Yep.
	No.
	Well, it's just like...
	Wait, what?
	No.
	You guys have not heard of Ronald Reagan?
	Oh.
	Is that that Nomics guy?
	Yeah, he's that cowboy actor, and he was like, I'll tell you what, give you some trickle down.
	I mean, it's working for me, dude.
	I'm fucking living the dream.
	How much pie do you have?
	How much of pie?
	I get to work, and maybe this is, you know, I learned this from Fun Dip the other week.
	Oh, yeah.
	I get to work 11 hours a day sometimes.
	That's so cool.
	That's so cool, dude.
	For somebody else, and that's like a lot of fun.
	Sometimes there's a Dr. Pepper.
	You get the opportunity?
	It's somebody else's.
	And sometimes it's mine, and sometimes...
	Your co-worker might take it from you.
	They better not touch that pie in the fridge.
	They better not touch that pie.
	There's a lot of extra pie after Thanksgiving.
	We can bake more pies!
	A limitless number of pies!
	Brodigan, you forgot your pie graphic there, sir.
	There's a limit.
	There you go.
	Oh, wow.
	Look at all the pies.
	And that was such a good graphic!
	And Brodigan, for those who were listening, he was about five seconds left on the pies.
	At least five.
	In my defense, I was trying to think a new witty middle name for Alexander.
	We need more Brodigans is what we need.
	No, no, no.
	Alexandria, anti-diabetes.
	He's just trying to not so much pie, right?
	Oh, I got it.
	Alexandria, bye-bye, Mr. American Pie, Cortez.
	There we go.
	That's the worst of all of them.
	That's the last time I hand out bourbon before the show as a celebration for Not Gay Jared's pregnancy.
	Spoiler alert!
	So, I did cut out a bunch of their loose talking.
	The boys, in general, are all drunk on bourbon.
	Nice.
	That's so cool, dude.
	Steven is struggling with the news that Not Gay Jared is leaving the show, and it's clear.
	I'm drunk on Topo Chico.
	Oh, what you got there?
	Twist of grapefruit.
	Delicious.
	I mean, do we want to talk about pie anymore?
	It's just, it's not really a good theory.
	If I was The Rock, I'd be like, what kind of pie?
	Is that a catchphrase of The Rock?
	Yeah, yeah.
	And then he'd be like, is it cherry pie?
	And then they'd be like, well, no.
	And they'd be like, is it apple pie?
	And then they'll be like, well, it smells like, I know, poontang pie!
	There's no way that Dwayne the Rock Johnson had a catchphrase that involved poontang pie!
	Oh, buddy, I'm gonna send you...
	Don't!
	Holy shit, is this real?
	Oh, yeah.
	K-Lo's pie!
	Poontang pie!
	Whoa!
	That's amazing.
	I don't give a shit about Stephen's take on pie.
	It's really easy to say, hey, the whole world's doing better when you're personally doing better when the whole world isn't doing great.
	People can't buy houses now.
	Tons of people are filing for bankruptcy.
	Homelessness is increasing.
	And also, in this example, if you have a fuck ton of pie, you don't want any pie.
	There's a limit to how much pie is needed.
	I'll say I love pumpkin pie.
	I can eat a whole pumpkin pie in a week.
	Easy.
	You could?
	Yes.
	If I had enough Cool Whip, I could do it.
	Great.
	I'm just fucking around with a little bit of cobble.
	Hell yeah, dude.
	Well, I set out to share more about Not Gay Jared in this episode.
	He has been pretty quiet.
	Yeah, he's probably ashamed.
	I don't know about that.
	Let's not give him that much credit.
	He most certainly hasn't been given an entire segment.
	No.
	Not like half-Asian lawyer Bill Richmond.
	And now for Barely Legal with Bill Richmond.
	Sponsored by my club.
	Hi, Bill Richmond, Louder with Crowder's Half Asian Lawyer, here to explain sometimes confusing legal terms and concepts.
	Today we're talking about different types of courts that exist to solve legal issues.
	First up, family court.
	Divorce, child custody, you probably know what I'm talking about.
	But if you don't, think O.J. Simpson and Nicole Brown's first fight, but with less blood and no gloves.
	Talking to Stephen, explaining him what courts are.
	Yeah, what is this?
	Well, it's an explanation of different courts.
	Yeah, why though?
	Man, if we could just make like a schoolhouse rock so that I can understand this a little better.
	Dude.
	Half-Asian lawyer Bill Richmond.
	Save that thought.
	I don't know.
	Next is probate court, where you resolve post-death issues like wills and estates and inheritances.
	It's the place Anna Nicole Smith hung out on weekends hoping for a pot of gold.
	General Jurisdictional Court is a potpourri of judicial forums.
	You get a little civil, a little criminal, a little family, a little probate.
	A lot of small-time, small-county courts are like that.
	Then you go to the next level, the Court of Appeals, where someone smarter is going to be checking your work.
	And finally, the Supreme Court at the top dog in most states and the United States.
	In some states, though, like New York, they just want to be different and honoree.
	They call their basic court the Supreme Court, and then their top court the Court of Appeals.
	What?
	Yeah, this is a comedy show, right?
	I mean, he had some jokes written in there, but they were just kind of at the expense of other people.
	Yeah, they were bad jokes.
	So there's a little bit of Bill for you.
	I bet you're wondering why he's not on the show every week.
	Yeah, that guy.
	Man.
	So this was an interesting time for YouTube and censorship.
	Speaking of Bill and his case against YouTube, I feel like we talked about this deeply enough during our episode covering Stephen Crowder on Piers Morgan, but YouTube, Facebook, Twitter, and Apple had just simultaneously deplatformed Alex Jones.
	Sure.
	Stephen, in response to that, gets a lawyer and professional rapper, Ben Shapiro, on the horn to discuss it.
	Or make racks off compound interest.
	Compound interest.
	I know you guys are excited, but it's super boring, so I skipped it.
	He's pretty much just plugging his live version of the show that he was doing, like a little tour back then, but that wasn't the only interview on this episode.
	This is one of my personal favorites.
	We had Nick DiPaolo, I think, last week or two weeks ago.
	I think he's one of, if you're going to take Pure Comedy, one of the best comedians out there working today, you can follow him on the Twitter, at Jim Norton, as long as I still allow him, and he'll be at Hilarities in Cleveland, August 17th.
	And 18th, I think?
	Hey, jimnorton.com.
	Jim, do I have that right?
	Is it 17th and 18th?
	It is, yeah.
	It's my first time in that club.
	It's supposed to be a great club.
	Everybody loves the owner.
	So whenever comedians love the club owner, it's a good place because usually comedians look at club owners the way you look at a guard at Dachau.
	So I'm kind of happy to be finally going there.
	You look jacked, by the way.
	You look big.
	No, you know what it is?
	I've just lost weight because I'm sick.
	Always sick.
	Always sick.
	Consistently ill.
	Also, what a weird way to start an interview with somebody confirming some data.
	I mean, you want to...
	We've got Jim Norton on the show.
	Jim, what was the date of that show you played again?
	I also like that he, every time he talks to a stand-up comedian, he's like, you know who's really good, though?
	It's this other guy, Nick DiPaolo, that I can't stop talking about, even in 2018. Wow.
	Obsessed.
	And what a dedication to Not Gay Jared by...
	Having all these other people on the show.
	Having two other people on the show.
	Yeah, a packed show.
	Jim Norton, I'm indifferent, I think.
	Stand-up comedian.
	Yeah.
	Radio personality.
	Sometimes actor.
	I recognize him.
	Isn't he like with the opening?
	Yeah.
	Yeah, yeah.
	He kind of picked it up after Anthony left.
	Yeah, Anthony Cumbia.
	Was he in movies?
	I feel like he's been in movies.
	I don't know.
	Yeah, he's definitely been on stuff.
	He's been in things.
	Oh, he's Spider-Man.
	Oh, really?
	It's currently Jim Norton and Sam Roberts.
	He was a surly truck driver in Spider-Man.
	That's how you know him?
	Jesus Christ.
	I know him from his kind of yucky, self-deprecating humor.
	But also, he tackles taboo topics.
	Pro-masturbation comedian.
	Are you guys pro or against masturbation?
	I'm indifferent.
	I'm agnostic about it.
	I don't know.
	I don't believe in it.
	Seems like Steven's always watching, too.
	He's definitely...
	We got them judgy little eyes.
	Speaking of judgment, though, I'm surprised that Steven is okay with having Jim Norton on the show because he actively talks about sexual experiences with transgender people.
	Plugs his ears and just la la la la la la.
	Well, I guess so.
	Still finds him funny.
	Is it like a...
	Could you take what he said as being disparaging?
	No, it's not.
	I'm not 100% sure.
	I know that the experience didn't seem to be negative.
	Okay.
	Yeah.
	I mean, well, when he played the silly truck driver in Spider-Man.
	Great.
	Yeah, well, where's his politics like in that role?
	After a bunch of conversation about stand-up comedy and touring, name-dropping comedy clubs in an attempt to convince Jim and the audience that Steven is, in fact, a comedian.
	I do comedy, yeah.
	It's on to more important topics like Netflix.
	Cool.
	Comedy death.
	Hannah Gatsby.
	We were talking about this on air.
	I never want to put other comedians in an awkward situation.
	But I remember tossing this to the audience.
	So I want to get your thoughts on the state of comedy today and kind of political correctness.
	This special was praised, was lauded for being the first comedy special that wasn't comedy.
	It wasn't subversive.
	She actually just says comedy, self-deprecation is just humiliation.
	And it's it goes into after school special.
	What's your take on this concern?
	The media has just I know it's been the big thing at the festival It's been praised everywhere front page write-ups.
	What's your read?
	Well, the media stinks I watched Hannah's special, but I went into it kind of expecting to hate it completely.
	I'm like, alright.
	And I watched it, and I'm like, okay, I'm watching for the first 40 minutes.
	I'm like, she's a legit stand-up.
	She's not all curmudgeoning.
	She does this thing after a punch.
	She smiled a lot.
	Paul Mooney does that.
	Paul Mooney will say some really harsh stuff, and then he smiles, and it just lets the air.
	It's a technique.
	It's like a performance technique.
	I like the fact that she talked about really hard subjects.
	Anytime somebody's talking about being raped or being gay and called a man, all this stuff that messed her up, and then she does this whole thing on art.
	I've never heard anybody talk about contemporary art.
	Or the way artists were perceived as sex or whatever.
	So at least it was very, very original.
	So I liked it, but at the end when it kind of became a TED Talk, I didn't think she needed to do that.
	That's a good way to put it.
	She didn't need to do that.
	She could do that, but when she says something like, well, self-deprecation is humiliation.
	It can be, but it doesn't have to be because nobody...
	So real quick, before we start talking about Hannah Gadsby, I did just remember that Jim Norton's actually married to a transgender woman.
	They got married in 2022. It seems like it may have been kind of a joke at the beginning or used as like a shock value thing.
	But yeah, I mean, since his relationships continue with transgender folks, he's continued discussing more openly as like a genuine part of his sexuality.
	Okay, that makes sense.
	The whole time I'm hearing this...
	This is an interesting...
	Yeah, I feel like Steven didn't vet this guy.
	I mean, he clearly knows Jim Norton.
	Sure, but he probably was just like...
	Man, can you sell us a bit more?
	He's not looking for, like, an alternative perspective.
	He's never done that on his show.
	Yeah, yeah.
	So I don't know why he's baiting Jim Norton.
	Clearly not the right person to be having a discussion if that's the direction you want to go.
	Yeah, I also, I never saw this show, but I feel like so many comedians have political leanings and have really good political takes.
	And I mean comedians, not Steven Crowder.
	Yes, yes.
	This was an interesting stand-up.
	Special.
	I believe I did see it when it came out, but I don't have a lot of strong memories.
	Washington Post called it remarkable.
	New York Times called it soul-affirming.
	And Vice called it groundbreaking.
	Do you have any non-woke media?
	Yeah, it looks like some more critical views called it social justice.
	What did Matt Walsh say about it?
	Let's just pretend this is coming out of his mouth.
	Social justice propaganda and unfunny, condescending, in an attempt to remove humor from comedy and replace it with activism.
	Sounds like a show I don't want to watch.
	Well, you could always not watch it.
	What?
	Yeah, I mean...
	What the hell?
	I mean, you don't have to watch every special that comes out on Netflix.
	It's really funny to hear the way that people talk about these kind of shows.
	It reminds me a lot of when The Last of Us 2 came out, that video game.
	A lot of people were really upset about things happening in the game and people were like, so I'm supposed to feel like...
	You don't have to feel however you want.
	Alright, well, now I'm filling myself up on Pornhub watching this scene with Abby, so what do you think of that?
	I'm here for it, dude.
	I am here for it.
	If that's what you want to do, go for it.
	Don't tell anyone.
	It's shameful for me.
	Okay.
	Of course, Stephen, he...
	Stephen's gonna know.
	Stephen already knows, dude.
	Is definitely not gonna understand that people can enjoy what they want to enjoy and leave it at that.
	As a white American conservative male, he's gonna keep talking.
	Nice.
	And that's why I wanted to get your take, because we've talked about it with Nick DiPaolo, who was on recently, and I think he's going to be in third chair here in the coming weeks, in studio with us, because you deal with a lot of these issues that are pretty rough, too.
	And you've caught some flack sometimes for it.
	But it's a lot harder to come out and take that pain, because that's what comedy is, and turn it into something funny, than it is to sermonize.
	And so that's where, for me, the problem was when the media tried to really prop this up and prop up the sermonization, which was the least interesting part of the special.
	Because here's the thing.
	A lot of people talk about modern art and postmodernism.
	It's like Jordan Peterson, Ben Shapiro on this show.
	Just not in comedy because a lot of these people aren't able to turn it into something funny.
	That was my issue with it, and that was the second half.
	Yeah, no, no, I agree.
	Because I was enjoying, I love watching somebody talk about that really hard subject matter.
	But I don't believe that you can't make it funny, and I don't believe joking about it, if you joke about it the right way.
	Or a way that you feel good about is ever selling yourself out.
	If you're doing self-deprecation, well then find another way to tell your story.
	But I didn't hate it at all.
	And Jim's fine with it.
	Did Stephen imply that comedy is pain?
	Well, he actually said that comedy is a rounded sword, which is actually just supposed to be used as a weapon that doesn't hurt.
	Is that really how it's called comedy?
	That's really weird.
	Well, it is because comedy can be...
	Anything that's funny to a person.
	Yeah.
	Comedy can be, I mean...
	It doesn't have to be an attack.
	Yeah.
	I don't know about...
	Okay.
	I mean, that says a lot, I think.
	It sounded almost like Stephen was going to be like, you know, for me, comedy is healing.
	No, comedy is violence that doesn't draw blood.
	I don't know what comedy is, I guess.
	I mean, obviously I don't because I don't think Steven shows comedy.
	That's the main purpose of this podcast is to...
	We're comedy.
	We're comedy podcasts, right?
	No, I was going to say we're trying to learn from Steven.
	We want to be funny.
	I want to be so funny.
	I want to be as funny as Steven one day.
	It does sound like the Hannah Gatsby special on the net isn't really funny in the second half, and some people call it more of like a one-woman show, which...
	It's kind of its own thing, too.
	Like, Mike Birbiglia's specials are more like one-person shows.
	Or Chris Gethard does the same kind of thing with his special career suicide.
	What was the Neil Brennan's three microphones or whatever?
	I didn't see that one.
	I'm aware of it.
	And what's to say that a show has to stick to a specific genre?
	Because comedy is a strict formula.
	Punchlines only.
	Literal.
	Did you guys know that Neil Brennan wrote...
	The Pierre Escargot sketches from all that.
	What?
	Really?
	Yeah, does that blow your mind a little bit?
	Wow.
	Him and Kenan.
	One last critique of comedy that kind of stood out to me.
	I hate to disagree with you, but I think it was like a 20-minute set with an hour-something special.
	Because there was the punchline of the first portion, but then it really stood out because there was a long gap with no comedy there.
	Huh.
	A comedian that's only funny 20% of the time?
	Maybe that's impressive for Steven.
	He's jealous.
	How did they get 20% man?
	I only get like two.
	Remember how he bills this as a late night comedy show?
	Yeah.
	And it's just gone increasingly like less funny as time has gone on.
	Do you think maybe that's what he's missing, is he doesn't have his Kevin Eubanks?
	Oh, wow.
	He does need a real funny co-host.
	Someone like Nick DiPaolo.
	Yeah, definitely Nick.
	Give Nick DiPaolo a Stratocaster.
	You know, what's funny to me about this is that...
	The way that...
	I don't even know if it's funny.
	It's probably not funny because I'm a bad comedian.
	It's almost like Steven doesn't understand that entertainers are still people who can do what they want to do.
	Yeah.
	I feel like he would be the kind of guy who...
	Here comes a denicism.
	Uh-huh.
	Everyone.
	Bingo board.
	Bingo board.
	Bingo board's going.
	He's like the kind of guy who would be like, Oh, that band's sold out.
	Yeah.
	Like they owe him the music that he wants and not the other way around.
	Yeah.
	Like, hey man, if you don't like it, just change the channel.
	Change the...
	Don't watch the show.
	Don't watch the special.
	And also, let people enjoy things.
	Totally.
	What do you want?
	I'm broke.
	I can't jerk off.
	This guy's gonna judge me if I do it.
	I don't care.
	I'm indifferent.
	Let me just say, shame on Hannah for not giving Stephen what he wants.
	Well, yeah.
	Hannah isn't funny.
	That's clear.
	Obviously.
	But if not her, who is funny?
	He is so funny and I don't think that he gets the credit he deserves just because he's technology averse.
	Yeah.
	And he's also more conservative.
	And look, the reality is in entertainment, like look what they just did to Alex Jones.
	Look, love or hate Alex Jones.
	I get why people don't, I don't like a lot of the stuff he says.
	I don't like a lot of his dumb conspiracies.
	But he should be able to say whatever he wants.
	That frightens me when people's right to say stuff that I don't like or you don't like is taken away.
	It's crazy.
	Before we jump to Alex Jones, who do you think he's talking about?
	Gosh.
	Louis C.K. No.
	Damn.
	It's Nick DiPaolo again.
	Is it?
	Really?
	That seems too easy.
	I know.
	I'm so sorry.
	I wish I would have cut that.
	I was just thinking all this jerk-off stuff.
	Yeah.
	All right.
	He does go on to talk a little bit about Alex Jones.
	We've covered his whole demonetization saga.
	Yeah.
	We did that in detail.
	It's time to celebrate the career of a man who is not gay enough that it needs dated frequently.
	Thank you, Ben Shapiro and Jim Norton.
	Next week, incredible week of shows.
	And we're going to have Owen Benjamin here all week.
	Sipping some sketches.
	Going to be a lot of fun.
	Going to be really funny to have neo-Nazi Owen Benjamin on the show all next week.
	We're doing skits!
	I think this is before his redoubt in...
	Idaho phase, but yeah, Owen is just kind of burning bridges, honestly, all the way there.
	He was a co-host on InfoWars' fourth hour for quite some time, hung around the Louder with Crowder stage until he got pushed out of there.
	He couldn't figure out how to yes and.
	Neither of them could.
	I think it's probably he just said the N-word too much.
	Probably.
	Apparently, a former fan of Owen Benjamin said Owen, quote, lost really good friendship.
	Specifically mentioning close relationship with Steven Crowder and Steven Crowder's father, Bob's Crowder.
	And that there was some sort of exchange publicly between the two.
	We used to deep kiss and then we fought.
	In 2019. And most recently, March of 2024, Owen Benjamin made comments suggesting that Steven Crowder is, quote, odd.
	I wonder what that means.
	Imagine Owen Benjamin calling you odd.
	A lot of drama there.
	So, we're celebrating a man.
	Let's celebrate.
	Yeah.
	And, yes, we talked about it earlier, so we teased it, and it is with a heavy heart that actually, at Not K. Jared, the character, as it were, will be retired after this program.
	Not K. Jared will be moving on to...
	I guess you say greener pastures.
	People always confuse that with taking behind the barn.
	No, no.
	Greener pastures means good things.
	But let them know.
	You have some stuff going on.
	Yeah.
	There is a lovely missus in my life.
	And a lovely lady.
	And I will be joined by another lovely lady in just a few short months.
	That's true.
	So I'm very excited.
	And you're really not gay.
	I've done some really not gay stuff.
	That's a really weird way to phrase it, you having a daughter.
	Yeah, another...
	You can't call your wife a lovely lady and then say your daughter is...
	Going to be joining you?
	Another lovely lady?
	I just thought that they were opening things up.
	Well, let's not.
	They found a unicorn.
	Okay.
	Let's not get too deep into that.
	It's not like Nakajir was fired because he decided to have a...
	No, no, no.
	For those who don't know...
	Oh, you're pregnant.
	Oh, you're fired.
	Yes.
	There's exponential growth, obviously, with the show and a lot of new pressures and expectations.
	And listen, you just...
	The hours it takes to put in the show is just pretty crazy.
	Really darn hard, and yeah, it's just a good time.
	Move on to making babies, and there you go.
	Was never gay.
	There was never any tense conversation about the workload, do you think?
	No, not at all.
	I think that 16 hours at the studio and travel and all that was just an expectation that Stephen had that not gay Jared was totally fine with, right?
	He was good with it, absolutely.
	I mean, if you care deeply about America.
	You should sacrifice everything to live in a compound with Stephen Crowder.
	Yeah, right.
	Also, real quick, do you know anyone who thinks that moving on to greener pastures means a bad thing?
	No, not being shot behind a barn.
	Yeah.
	A phrase that he misunderstands is suddenly hoisted upon everyone else.
	Yeah, it was a malifor.
	Huh, is that what that is?
	Malicious.
	It's like, it's when you make the wrong metaphor.
	Kind of.
	You know, he just said he's got me out here on the chain gang and he's gaslighting my ass.
	Classic.
	I love those.
	Add those to the bingo board if anyone's making one.
	I was incorrect.
	Malifor is when you combine two wrong.
	Like, we'll burn that bridge when we come to it.
	It's good to learn new things.
	Yeah, I know.
	I'm an idiot.
	You're not an idiot.
	I'm ignorant to what that word meant and I used it inappropriately and I'm sorry.
	And that's why I'm firing you.
	Shit.
	But where did all of this not gay Jared stuff begin?
	I don't know.
	Because his name isn't legally not gay.
	I feel like it started from a no homo joke.
	Like, I feel like that's...
	That's interesting.
	Yeah, let's do guesses, Jared.
	That's honestly what I would expect.
	Yeah, I thought it was really that his name was not gay.
	Okay, legally.
	I thought he was...
	Maybe that he wasn't an English guy, you know?
	I don't know.
	Yeah.
	Not gay.
	From the root...
	Not gay.
	Do you remember how it started?
	Yeah, you said...
	Hey, I have a producer here.
	Gay Jared.
	No, I said he also happens to be gay.
	And I just said it as a joke because I think you had told me that gay guys come on to you quite a bit.
	All the time.
	Right.
	Apparently, I like your shoes is a common pickup line in H&M. Yeah, yeah.
	I get that all the time.
	I'm like...
	I was wearing flip-flops.
	You're actually very fortunate that they use that as an opening.
	Often they don't even talk.
	I know.
	They don't even talk.
	They just escort me to the changing room.
	Clean you forward.
	And then after that, a lot of people started their own conspiracy, whether you were gay or not, because you kept saying you weren't gay, and we said, okay, well, let's go with this, and the not-gay Jared character was born.
	We gotta go with this.
	This is a hilarious bit.
	I called you gay on the air, and you got really uncomfortable by that, because you had an experience at H&M when you were buying skinny jeans?
	Hey, nice shoes.
	And you took that to be really weird.
	I think this guy was coming on to me.
	Have you guys had guys here before?
	In the hot topic.
	Let's make this your personality for the next decade.
	I think that's probably a good idea.
	That seems appropriate.
	It's, you know, like you don't get to choose your nickname kind of thing.
	Oh, yeah.
	Hey, this is Don't Like Pizza Barn.
	And my band.
	They called me Bones.
	Bones?
	Yeah.
	Did they really?
	Yeah, that's kind of cool, right?
	I got slayed when I was a child.
	Yeah, that's close.
	Yeah, that makes sense.
	People just called me by my name, usually.
	Or worse names.
	I was going to say, I mean, I know a nickname that you hate, and I'm not going to share it with anyone, because I respect you.
	Last week, we were talking about the early days of Steven Crowder's AM radio show.
	Oh, man.
	It was better back then.
	There is a point where Fun Dip is no longer part of the deal, and Jared actually replaces Fun Dip.
	Whoa.
	Well...
	A little bit too not boring, actually, because...
	If you want to talk about sort of providential, the day Jared became equipped at producing this as a podcast was the day the station that carried us would no longer carry the show because of some of the jokes that we had made.
	Yeah.
	We're like, hey, let's try this video, and let's try Thursday night instead of Friday morning at 6 a.m.
	We're like, good, because we're not, that's the only option.
	Then we had a producer who said, yeah, your jokes, we can't do this.
	And we're like, well, okay.
	Okay.
	All right, see ya.
	Move on.
	Yeah.
	I wonder if that producer was Fun Dip or if it was a station manager, but...
	I have no idea.
	I didn't know he got booted off the air.
	That's great to hear.
	Yeah.
	The content got too rowdy.
	Yeah.
	Which is surprising because, I mean, while we disagreed with a lot of stuff he was saying on that early episode we covered last week, it wasn't anything that was too outwardly offensive, you know?
	Sure.
	Inflammatory.
	Yeah, it was just like...
	Dumb, stupid humor.
	Bad takes with poor jokes, but none of the jokes were like shock humor, which is kind of what he tries to do now, is just make people upset and uncomfortable.
	Totally, yeah.
	Honestly, I could see it being funded, being like, I'm sick of this guy.
	Listen, I have established contact in some ways.
	Is he here?
	No, he's not here.
	Why is there always people?
	This is my house.
	It's okay.
	You think people are just looking at my house?
	It's like Fundip would just lay in your bed.
	I mean, I got a room over there, I guess.
	He's got a tablet and he's watching YouTube videos.
	Yeah, I don't know about that.
	He's waiting under the ring for his big moment.
	Yeah, he is.
	To slide in.
	All I gotta say is people have feelings about Fundip and we're gonna explore that.
	I like him.
	A little bit more.
	Ask him what his favorite Beatles track is.
	Oh!
	Speaking of favorite things.
	What would you say your best memory is on the show?
	Oh, gosh.
	Probably dressed as a turkey taking a dump on the Texas Capitol in the ladies' restroom.
	Wait.
	What?
	When did we do this?
	Right before he interviewed Wendy Davis.
	Oh, okay.
	I was like, that's not on tape.
	Actually, I'm pretty sure we do have tape.
	I'm pretty sure it's on tape.
	I'm pretty sure we have tape.
	He interviewed Wendy Davis?
	It does seem like he did interview Wendy Davis, but more importantly...
	Sorry, Wendy.
	Yeah.
	He was dressed up discussing women's bathrooms.
	I get your...
	It's just so gross and unfortunate.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	Do you want to know what they were working on, though?
	Sure.
	What was it?
	It was a little parody called I'm Just a Bill Transgender Schoolhouse Rock Parody.
	Fucking goddammit.
	Oh my god.
	Content warning, of course.
	Oh no.
	Oh fuck.
	Oh I'm just a bill But I'd like to be Jill And I'm sitting here on Capitol Hill Where I am all dolled up And I'm feeling really pretty Let's just take a quick second to discuss
	that and then we'll continue on.
	This is better than most of his AI transgressions.
	Bad, though.
	Oh, it's not good.
	I think he got, I'm just a Bill.
	But I'd rather be chill.
	Yeah, I think that he heard that and he goes, I got it.
	I got it.
	I got the whole fucking thing right.
	Just hit record.
	Hit record right now.
	This is the new Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve.
	Absolutely.
	This is where, in the video, Jared and Steven have a little bit of a conversation.
	Okay.
	Gee, Bill, people sure are making a big fuss over boys using the ladies' bathrooms.
	Oh, I'm not a boy.
	And that's because those laws are hate speech.
	Hate speech?
	Yes, see, transgenders want to use whatever bathroom they feel like.
	But some businesses and organizations complained and said they didn't want grown men next to little girls in public stalls.
	So the state legislature passed laws requiring that people use the bathroom based on the gender they're bored with.
	You mean like, if you have a penis or a vagina?
	No, see, because gender's non-binary.
	Take me.
	I consider myself gender fluid.
	Gender fluid?
	Yes.
	See, that means I can change my gender on any given day based on how I feel.
	And if people question me, I'll just call the ACLU. Wow.
	Wow.
	Which is exactly how it always is with these types of people, right?
	I hate these types.
	Flip-flopping the way they feel?
	He has to pull out his fucking...
	Bill Cosby.
	Yeah, Bill's back, basically.
	Different Bill, but pretty close.
	He's close to Bill.
	It's too tight, Steven.
	You have to loosen up.
	It's not in his Q-Zone, right?
	Stop telling adults that it's in their Q-Zone!
	I mean, obviously that goes on, because the original's much longer, so they attempt that.
	We're not gonna...
	I'll just say that I now and forever have always hated transgender bathroom conversations.
	It's such a waste of time.
	It's such a waste.
	It's such just like I'm going to demonize a group of people for no reason.
	For no reason.
	I said it wrong.
	No more scamming adults into thinking they're stars!
	You remember it, right, Dennis?
	No.
	It's a Tim Robinson sketch.
	Nobody tricked me.
	I am a star!
	Exactly.
	That's Jared's favorite memory.
	That's his favorite memory.
	Was dressing up as a transgender person and then going to the bathroom in a stall.
	I mean, this is where it's tough because we're about to enter a conversation about a lawsuit against Stephen, or I guess a lawsuit that Stephen lost against Jared.
	Well, I would say that he didn't lose it.
	It didn't happen.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, it was settled out of court.
	We may be on the side of Jared in that case, but not gay Jared is not a good guy.
	No.
	Even a broken clock is right twice a day.
	Or just tells the time on accident.
	That's another way to say that, yeah.
	But there's a couple more details about this experience.
	Sure.
	And while we were taping it, a state senator?
	Super far left Democratic lady.
	Super far left black lady came up and she's like, but that's great!
	How you educate.
	Can I take a picture?
	Yeah, they were like, please do.
	Please do!
	And she uploaded it to Instagram.
	We retweeted her.
	Yes.
	And that was our first...
	It was great.
	It was an accidental troll job.
	Wow.
	It was.
	Before we did...
	I think it was before we did really any of the serious undercover stuff.
	She hates you, by the way.
	Yeah, I'm pretty sure she does.
	Steven had a great time, too, because some Democratic black lady accidentally took a picture with them.
	I love that.
	It's so cool, Steven, that you got retweeted because you lied to people about what you were doing.
	That's awesome, man.
	So things wind down, and this is how this should work, right?
	Is Stephen should give Jared, like, a gift or some sort of recognition.
	Yeah, usually like a bottle of booze or something.
	He didn't get him a gift.
	No?
	Close your eyes and hold out your hands.
	Is what, not gay, Jared said to Stephen.
	Gave him a gift.
	No.
	I'm using a knife here, so if something goes wrong for those who are listening, audio.
	Apparently I... I didn't have any wrapping tape, so I used boxing tape and wrapped...
	It's very considerate of you, but this is a terrible wrapping.
	This is terrible.
	Well, I thought, it was a little...
	Like a five-year-old.
	I'm like, it could rain, so I wrapped it completely with tape.
	All right.
	Dear God.
	Probably could have put it in the back.
	This is all tape!
	Oh my gosh.
	This is all tape!
	We're making progress.
	Oh, thank you very much!
	Well, people can't see it.
	Here, this is the original Stretch Armstrong.
	Aw, nice!
	It's very touching, but I'm not gonna cry because I told myself I wouldn't.
	Don't cry!
	Don't do it!
	I did it before being on air.
	Got it out of the way.
	And I took some bourbon.
	Some people have turned them emotional.
	No, this is because for people who don't remember, we couldn't afford the original Stretch Armstrong.
	We couldn't afford the Creepy Crawler.
	So I had the mini Stretch Armstrong and it broke very quickly.
	That was very thoughtful of you.
	I really do appreciate it.
	And we are for sure going to miss you quite a bit here.
	Because he jammed a goddamn fork into him.
	I guarantee it.
	And his dad was like, that thing cost $38, why did you do that?
	And there's just corn syrup everywhere.
	I had to know what was inside of him, Dad.
	The deeper lore of Steven and the creepy crawler Dr. Dreadful set is really interesting.
	I agree.
	His inability to get that as a child damaged him significantly.
	Yeah, he's traumatized.
	We talked about it a lot, right?
	Yeah.
	Imagine if he had a Mighty Max.
	I think he did, but he probably would call it gay because it's basically just...
	Polly Pocket.
	His dad would probably say that, actually.
	Shame him into not buying that.
	That's a fun toy.
	While it may seem like Stephen was giving a genuine send-off, he did also, at this point, announce that Quarter Black Garrett was going to be taking over Not Gay Jared's spot.
	Sure.
	I think he lasted maybe two years until he left in 2020 because he said he was burnt out of covering politics on a daily basis.
	And now he is the co-host of a political show called Normal World with former third chair Dave Lando.
	Wow.
	Okay.
	On Blaze, which is the network that Steven used to be on, which is also the network that Jared was going to go work on a show after this.
	But unfortunately, for a refresher, this is from Not Gay Jared, Jared Monroe's.
	Video that he posted when he came out with the hashtag free Jared.
	Sure.
	Yeah.
	All I simply wanted to do was peacefully leave.
	I did not want to sign anything, mind you.
	Um, But the negotiations with my former employer left no question that without a signed NDEA, my guaranteed silence, I would undoubtedly be harassed well into the future.
	No matter if there are future claims against me for where I worked or what I did or what I said were legitimate or not, it didn't matter.
	It would cost me thousands and thousands to fight back, and they knew that.
	I had to make a deal.
	With nothing but a small savings account and my last paycheck, I had to accept the deal I could afford.
	It's very important to note here that...
	Where is it?
	It's here.
	I was not paid a single dollar for its consideration.
	Which brings me to what you might be asking next.
	What was the reason I did sign this?
	And again, as a man with his first child on the way, the small victory I got from it.
	The primary reason I signed the NDA was for a small carve-out in the non-compete clause, which allowed me to freely seek employment using some of my skill sets at another specific company.
	At least I could be with my family.
	That provision, however, was a lie.
	And upon starting my new job at the new said company, I was giving another one of these, a cease and desist, and was promptly unlawfully terminated from that position.
	So you can hear more of the paper shuffling noises in Jared Monroe's conversation with himself.
	Can we get a sound effect of that, please?
	Sounds really good.
	I think we go through the whole thing in...
	Let's do that as an audio sweetener for the rest of this episode.
	Episode 26. Paper shuffling the whole time.
	Non-exposure agreement.
	Yeah, we cover the whole thing, including Gerald's response to that video.
	Yeah, and if you go back and start at 26 and then catch up to now...
	A day or two?
	Maybe a full day, yeah.
	Take a peek.
	You could listen 1.25 speed and maybe make it in less than 24. Or put it in.75 speed and we'll all sound drunk.
	That's kind of fun.
	We actually do sing Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree, so it is the Chipmunks.
	Yeah, yeah.
	Nice.
	Oh, I'm sorry.
	It's getting pumpkin hour over here.
	It's late, CST. I get it.
	Total victory in Stephen Crowder case.
	So we've been loosely following this situation.
	Yeah.
	I mean, of course, there's all the accusations of Stephen's workplace being shitty going into this, but there was also a lot of NDAs signed specifically after Not Gay Jared left and then even more after he came out when there was this kind of witch hunt.
	Of leaked information also attached to Stephen's custody battle that he was having during his divorce.
	I guess we can run through a timeline provided Jared Monroe's lawyer real quick, Matt Bruning.
	October 2023, Crowder began pursuing a variety of frivolous legal actions against Jared in Texas State Court, including filing a Rule 202 petition, which illegally sought to use the tools of judicial discovery to obtain information about which illegally sought to use the tools of judicial discovery to obtain information about protected activities and filing a legal lawsuit seeking to enforce
	This was a fishing expedition where I think Stephen was also looking to get the information that Jared and his then wife Hillary were doing.
	Exactly.
	He wanted to just, basically he was trying to sue to get him and Hillary's conversations.
	I think for the most part, but also I think he was probably looking to see if he was breaking this non-disparagement clause in the NDA in general.
	But mostly his wife.
	I don't believe that he was doing that.
	Sorry, I would say that I don't believe that he was trying to see if he was violating anything.
	I think he just was using the...
	Broad scope of that as a way to invade his privacy.
	Yeah, it's illegal.
	April 2024, acting as Jared's legal representative, the lawyer here, filed a ULP charge against Crowder in the Atlanta region of the NLBR, which is the National Labor Relations Board or something like that, alleging that Crowder maintains employment and severance agreements alleging that Crowder maintains employment and severance agreements with illegal non-disparagement and confidentiality clauses and that he filed an illegal lawsuit seeking to enforce an illegal non-disparagement clause.
	Sometime between May and June of 2024, Crowder voluntarily dismissed the illegal lawsuit that sought to enforce the illegal non-disparagement clause and filed a defamation suit against Jared for sending the following email to Crowder's ex-wife.
	Remember, this is the one that no one would have known anything about except that Gerald Morgan...
	Showed it to everybody?
	Showed it during the show.
	It says, I think there's a scenario where several of us would be willing to attest to all of that and still want to know what all of that is, but unfortunately that's not there.
	I just don't want him anywhere near those kids.
	That really, really disturbs me.
	This strategy appeared to rely on the assumption that a defamation lawsuit grounded in common law rather than a contractual breach would sidestep the issues encountered with the NLRB. That same month, they filed an amended ULP charge at the NLRB, alleging that Crowder had now filed a baseless and retaliatory defamation lawsuit against Jared, which is also a violation of the National Labor Regulations Act.
	October 2024, Texas court judge presiding over the defamation lawsuit granted Jared's motion to dismiss the case on the grounds that the lawsuit violated Texas' anti-SLAP statute.
	Strategic lawsuits against public participation, SLAPs.
	Two Ps, huh?
	Yeah.
	It aims to safeguard freedom of speech and public participation by providing a legal mechanism to quickly dismiss frivolous lawsuits intended to silence, intimidate or punish critics.
	Yep.
	So the judge ordered Crowder to reimburse Jared for forty three thousand thirty seven dollars of legal expenses and to pay an additional fifteen thousand dollars in sanctions.
	Remember, I think we talked about this early in an episode not too long ago.
	This was to deter Crowder from filing any similar actions in the future.
	And the judge also stipulated that Crowder would be required to pay an additional $35,750 to Jared if Crowder appealed the decision and then lost the appeal.
	Nice.
	Can't do it again.
	Yeah, added a fee to try it again.
	This brings us to the end of last year, December 2024. Crowder and Jared reached the settlement agreement above, in which Crowder agreed to pay Jared an undisclosed sum and rescinded the non-disparagement and confidentiality clauses in all of his employment and severance agreements for all employees.
	In exchange, Jared agreed to withdraw his NLRP charges.
	Wow.
	So...
	That's big, I guess, right?
	Did you look and see if the video of them being like, Jared, we want to do this, but we're doing it now.
	Do you know if that video is still online?
	Yeah.
	Is it?
	Oh, yeah.
	That surprises me.
	I think that would be part of the agreement to take it down.
	Gerald's Here's What You Don't Know video is still up.
	According to this agreement, it looks to me like Jared only received the lawyer costs.
	Oh, I see.
	It says he'll pay X amount, but then it says that it...
	It clarifies here.
	It says, the settlement payment represents attorney's fees and expenses incurred by a defendant in defending against LWC's legal actions.
	I wonder, I mean, I don't know the legal term.
	It's possible that that settlement payment...
	Represents that as well as other things.
	I mean, it is redacted, the amount of money.
	I don't see why they would have redacted if that other amount of money is disclosed.
	Either way, on that note, I can officially say Jared Monroe is now the enemy.
	He is the enemy, of course.
	Anyone who gave money to the Monroe Family Legal Fund, hashtag free Jared Monroe, which ended up being $98,480.
	I think you guys should...
	Get your money back, right?
	Because, I mean, he got his money back.
	What are you paying for now?
	Well, I just don't see why he wouldn't return the money to everyone else if he was reimbursed for all his legal fees.
	He should do it by making a bunch of $1 bills and then throwing them out of a hot air balloon over Texas.
	That's a reasonable way to do things, right?
	That's just how I feel about it, and that's actually just about all I can handle this week.
	Does anyone have any thoughts, final thoughts, maybe, about not gay Jared?
	My only thought is, what would you guys get me if you quit?
	What's your favorite toy?
	Stretch Armstrong.
	Then a Stretch Armstrong?
	Oh, yeah.
	Original.
	I had a Stretch Armstrong, and I had the dog, Stretch Armstrong.
	And then they had these ones that were, like, reverse Stretch Armstrong, so you'd suck the air out of them.
	See, I like that guy, the red guy.
	Oh, yeah, you'd, like, stretch him, and then they'd suck out the air, and then it would...
	That was my favorite.
	What was it called?
	Evil Stretch Armstrong?
	I typed in Evil Stretch Armstrong.
	Here he is.
	Bad guy.
	Stretch Armstrong top bad guy video.
	Yes, here we are.
	His name is...
	Vac Man.
	Vac Man.
	See, I like him more, but if he got a little hole, then he doesn't vac anymore.
	Well, but if the other one gets a hole, then you've got a sticky mess.
	But it's also kind of delicious.
	And then your dad screams at you.
	I knew I should.
	I never wasted any money on you.
	You little pig.
	I mean, for now, we don't have to worry about Jared Monroe, but with this change to his agreements, we might be seeing his new show, The Foxhole, actually coming to fruition here.
	The Foxhole, huh?
	Yeah, he talked about it loosely in a Dave Lando's Normal World interview before he was legally able to talk about any of this.
	I mean, Jared's been doing a little bit on the side.
	He also does something called Honest Fox Comedy.
	Where he produces stand-up specials for mostly clean, sometimes Christian-leaning comedians.
	He's found some success in that.
	I will just say, Jared, if you're listening, not you, Jared.
	I keep waking up every time I hear it.
	What?
	You're on notice.
	We're watching you.
	It's always good to end up an action-packed, exciting podcast by running through legal documents.
	I love legal documents.
	I didn't consider that that might suck a little bit of energy out of the show.
	No, man, I'm good.
	I appreciate it.
	I'm good.
	Jared's asleep.
	Dennis got pale and sat back in his chair.
	I don't know what's going on.
	Yeah, if you disagree with us, feel free to convince us otherwise.
	There's all kinds of bonus...
	My favorite website.
	I have it bookmarked ten times.
	What?
	Why?
	Shadowbanning.
	Yeah.
	Of course.
	The video version of a couple things there.
	Also, yeah, if you like what we're doing, that's a good place where you could join, follow, and support us.
	Shrug.club.
	I need all the support I can get right now.
	What?
	What's going on?
	Life's hard, man.
	Okay.
	Review us on Apple Podcasts.
	Say nice things about Dennis.
	Yeah, leave us some stars on Spotify.
	Do I even deserve nice things about him?
	That's up to them, I suppose.
	Do that for free, and that helps us a lot.
	In the spirit of quitting your job.
	Giving gifts for when you quit.
	Here's a gift from Vince Lombardi.
	What was it?
	Winners never quit and quitters never win.
	Jared Monroe.
	You know, when I quit my last job, my day job, my...
	My boss and my good friend gave me a mug that said, congratulations on pursuing your dream of not working here anymore.
	And I thought it was a great mug.
	Well, on the note of quitting, Spencer's Gifts, a guy is coming back sooner than I expected.
	Who's that?
	Jan 6. We got a little treat from Stephen during their downtime.
	Jan 6 was a psyop, and in 2025, we get justice.
	We will never give up.
	We will never concede.
	Hey, he's got a gun!
	Hey, he's got a gun!
	He's got a gun!
	He's got a gun!
	We need to go into the Capitol!
	Was Rahab Safed?
	We are going to the Capitol!
	The country has had enough, we will not take it anymore!
	What did he sound like that?
	January 6th, a day that will live in infamy.
	You tried for four years to tar and feather and not only destroy his reputation, but the reputations of all of his supporters.
	The American people, labeling them terrorists.
	You'll never take back our country with weakness.
	You have to show strength and you have to be strong.
	I know that everyone here will soon be marching over to the Capitol building peacefully and patriotically.
	Make your voices heard.
	He made sure to say follow the law.
	He said peacefully and patriotically.
	The problem is the lie.
	To say that he encouraged any violence or even unlawfulness.
	And in the end, it all failed.
	The Justice Department just released the...
	Bomb shell report that we've been waiting for.
	The FBI had 26 confidential human sources there that day.
	26. Starting January 20th, things are going to be changing around here.
	Changing big.
	We can't wait to see all of you.
	See you there.
	That movie trailer sound was a...
	So dumb.
	Well, that's how you announce the return of a show, of course.
	Of course.
	Can we do one of those?
	Our lousy...
	Yeah, let's just shoot some stingers real quick.
	Stop.
	The live show returns Wednesday, January 15th.
	Okay.
	And you can join Rumble Premium now, of course.
	That's awesome.
	I'm really looking forward to having them back.
	I think what I'm going to see now is I'm going to see a bunch of implosion on the right.
	Oh.
	You know?
	They're going to be mad at hypocrisy more than they're going to be mad at anyone else.
	Yeah.
	Find us on X at Dan Crowder.
	Louder than Crowder dot com.
	Louder with Crowder dot net.
	Have you ever wondered when it's bedtime for three podcast hosts?
	It's right now.
	We'll see you next week.
	Until next time, I'm Byron.
	I'm Jared.
	And I'm Dennis.
	Take care.
	You've been listening to an AudioWall original produced by Byron McCoy.

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