Why The FBI Is NOT Your Friend! McKayla Maroney Testifies on Larry Nassar | Louder with Crowder
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Mmm!
Mmm!
Tasty.
That's called a panic sip.
Because right before I just went on air, people, I was blowing my nose.
And then coughing up.
I have a just so you know, just really quick.
I have a sinus.
I don't know how my parents got COVID.
They're both totally fine.
Right?
Yeah.
But I repeat myself.
They're both totally fine.
Then I felt like I had symptoms, and I thought I had the Rona, and I test—home test—negative.
My wife the next day had much milder symptoms—positive.
Then I tested negative going into—two times in three days.
I do not have it.
I finally spoke with my—they're like, oh yeah, you must have had it already.
What?
And I said, well, how does that happen?
They're like, well, you must have had, I said, but I didn't test a negative for anybody.
She said, those tests aren't reliable.
Oh, good.
I said, what?
Which test is reliable?
And then I started looking at, apparently my blood type is B negative.
And that's incredibly rare, like 1% of the population.
I think it's three.
My wife said three.
It's so low.
It's the lowest one though.
It's the second lowest.
No, O is above that.
O is at six.
No, O is actually not that uncommon.
The point is, there is some research.
I was like, maybe there's a natural, because there is a natural protective effect, and I've read all of the studies, and there have been a lot of studies, including one, I believe, in Denmark that studied hundreds of thousands of people.
However, of course, I have to say that it's inconclusive.
Absolutely.
Not an expert, but Howard Stern can say the vaccine's a cure.
Screw that guy.
All right, Gerald A. is here.
How are you, sir?
I'm better than you.
Yeah, so far.
The sinus infection is way worse than the Rona.
I care.
I've been coughing up flubber.
You have?
Yeah.
Quarterback Garrett?
I'm glad I don't have what you have.
Yeah, well, you got to watch out for that sickle cell.
And Dave Landau.
How are you, sir?
Ahoy.
Ahoy, boy.
All right.
This is a weird start.
So we are going to talk about today, and I want to go because I want to give Dave some time here in relation to Jim Brewer.
We have some announcements regarding if you've paid for Dave's live shows, it'll affect some of the ticket holders.
Sorry, but I hope you understand.
But I want to talk today about the FBI.
Just so you know, we're going to get to that.
Why the FBI is not really your friend.
And I think it's important to delineate between the guys with guns and the guys at desks pushing pencils.
Right.
There's a big difference.
And that doesn't mean that guys can't do great work for the country pushing pencils, but that's when we're talking about unelected officials.
Hey, you know, Millie, this is someone unelected and unaccountable.
Someone unelected and unaccountable who is undermining your elected president, thus the commander in chief of the military.
Then we look at the FBI.
Most of the people who are heading this up They are not elected.
They are not accountable to anyone.
The gymnastic sexual assault case, which went on for years, is just the tip of the iceberg when you look at all of the fake stings.
I don't mean false flag operations.
What I mean is when a lot of the stings that you've heard about, the majority of them carrying them out, insurrections, were the FBI agents inside these groups.
But then billions of dollars in damages and dozens of deaths, nothing!
Self-avowed terrorist organizations who are committing acts of violence, nothing!
And that's because it's a lot easier for the FBI to go and say, look what we got, when you stage a plot yourself, than it is to go to your superior and say, we really failed to, some riots really got away from us.
Well, who better to be in charge of domestic terrorism than the government agency that invaded the wrong country twice?
Yes.
I agree.
And got us all addicted to heroin.
Indeed they did.
Well, I mean, there's a positive, right?
Yes.
Oh, that's bad.
That's bad, never mind.
And they put crack into the ghettos.
Good for them.
Don't forget that, syphilis!
Grow up.
So, Jim Brewer is making the rounds.
Jim Brewer, well-respected comedian for a long time, friend of Dave's, and of course now is persona non grata.
And remember, just like Norm, a year and a half ago, They did the same thing with Norm, and what was the attack?
Norm Macdonald, still doing comedy?
Ha ha ha ha ha.
And it was so transparent, because of course Norm is one of the most respected comedians.
We all know this.
We all know that Norm is fantastic.
You may not like his humor, but like I said, there's objectively funny, objectively unfunny, and then there's subjective in the middle.
Objectively funny are Richard Pryor, you're George Carlin, you're Norm Macdonald, you're Jim Brewers, who Norm Macdonald respected immensely, by the way.
About, maybe up until two years ago, you wouldn't find a comedian who didn't respect Jim Brewer.
No.
He was one of the pure stand-ups who really wasn't that interested in doing SNL, wasn't interested, he would tell you, in doing films.
He did stand-up.
He was the stand-up's stand-up.
And funny!
Well he did, yeah, he did SNL after he did Uptown Comedy Club, whatever that was, that short-lived sketch show.
Yeah.
But yeah, he's known for being a stand-up.
He's done one movie.
Right.
You know, that's it.
How high, even though he hasn't touched drugs in decades?
Because this is why people hate him, he's a born-again Christian now.
Yes.
Well, his wife was a born-again Christian for a long time, and so is he.
He's relatively clean, but he's one of those guys who, when you go on before him, he's like, just don't be filthy, but I don't care.
He's all about comedy.
Yeah.
That was always me, too.
I would say, look, just don't make it so blue that then it's tough for me to go out and clean it up.
But I did Motor City Casino with him and Royal Oak Music Theater and a couple Detroit dates and he's uh he's phenomenal he's one of the best storytellers out there and yes up in there you start seeing these like terrible open mic comics or feature acts that are like screw this guy oh he and they're just attacking him it's like if you got a phone call right now to open for him you would be going 30 over to get to the theater right yes Which brings us to, we'll react to a TikTok video of a Lyft driver, not Uber, want to get it right so we don't get sued because we have to be held accountable here.
So here's a video actually, now Jim Brewer's under hot water because he's canceled shows at venues where he found out people were going to be forced to be vaccinated.
He's been making the rounds.
Let's just show a quick clip from Tucker last night.
My fans were really upset.
They said, you know, I'm not comfortable with getting a COVID shot, and now they're saying I can't come see you perform unless I do that.
And I looked into it, and that's the last thing you should be doing.
He looks high, but he's not.
He's going, hey, you want to come see this?
He always looks high.
That's his whole thing.
You're like feeding the seal the fish.
Hey, you want to come see a concert?
There's a new narrative, and the new narrative is the unvaccinated are the beast.
Kill the beast!
And when our leader put that out there and pointed the finger, like we're the demons?
Yeah, and that's a really good point.
Vilifying at least a quarter, depending on which numbers you use or believe, of the nation who don't want to be forcibly vaccinated.
By the way, that quarter people are not saying the vaccine doesn't work.
What they're saying is, well, you told us, and Howard Stern still says, it's a cure.
Now you're saying it prevents hospitalization.
Now you're saying we may need a booster shot.
And the one thing that is irrefutable is people can say, I still think it works right now, but I don't know the long-term effects, and that's a risk-reward.
And what I think is most important here to keep sight of is, look, I think it was, I don't remember who said this, but it might have been Norm Macdonald who said that a lot of comedians want to be rock stars.
There's a lot of similarities when you look at what they're doing to Eric Clapton.
Look, think about how they used to have Rock Against Bush, right?
No effects, which is the easiest thing in the world to rock against a Republican.
And you have Rage Against the Machine wearing the shirt of a socialist dictator who was not a revolutionary, Che Guevara.
He hated black people, hated gay people, executed people without trial, and was found in Bolivia holding his rifle, cowering, which had never been fired, saying, I'm worth more to you alive than dead!
Yeah, that's the rebel without a cause, except he has a cause.
It's called being a pussy.
Always been the machine.
You put him on your shirt.
And now, though, they're furious with Eric Clapton.
They're furious with any rock star or comedian who says, you know what?
I don't want to do the bidding of the government and force you to get vaccinated.
Look, this is not someone taking a stand forcing you to do anything.
This is a comedian, and now you have rock stars who are simply fighting for your right to choice.
Remember that word?
I was going to say party.
That's our saying.
Including Eric Clapton, we're always against the government.
That's what they were supposed to do.
Supposedly, yes.
But now it's transparent.
I've always argued that it's really they're against one party.
And so people say Republican, Democrat.
No, no, look.
They set that up.
So you only have one way to vote.
And believe me, I am not, I do not want Republicans to take our votes for granted.
But when you look at everyone, including the people who rage against the machine, who then
campaign for the machine, is there anything more machine than a politician who's been
in office for 50 years?
50 years who hasn't held private office, he's been suckling at the government teat, meaning your teat, for 50 years and can barely walk out to the podium without shitting his pants, without swamp monsters telling him what to say and where to go, and he admits it.
They're telling me to say this, they're telling me to go there, and you are raging against the machine by supporting and campaigning for him while trying to squelch independent voices like Jim Brewer who just wants to do comedy in shows.
Yeah, well, and he also made a really good point that I think is getting overlooked.
Some people are bringing it up, but he's like, hey, I had COVID already.
Right.
So I don't, I don't need necessarily, this was him saying this, right?
So I'm not medical doctor saying this.
He's like, I don't, I just don't need to go get the shot.
He's saying that no account is, or no kind of credit is being given to people that have the antibodies.
Right.
And that should be talked about.
That should be studied to make sure.
Like, hey, maybe that's better.
That's what Dr. Fauci was saying.
He's like, hey, it actually looks pretty good.
We'll see how long it lasts.
And maybe that's why there's no incentive to create accurate antibody tests.
But if you have the vaccine, why are you afraid of getting the illness if it works?
Exactly.
I don't understand.
That's why the entire thing's an oxymoron.
Look, this is right now.
It's not a pandemic of the unvaccinated.
It's a pandemic of people who don't like that they've made decisions with incomplete information.
People who got the vaccine early on, you got it because you were told.
We've been through it in this show.
You can hit all the links in the description here at louderwithcredit.com.
You were told that you don't need to worry about the virus once you're vaccinated.
They changed the definition of what that protection was.
So then you found out it was leaky, but they said, well, less chance of hospitalization.
Now they're saying maybe a booster.
And they're conflicted about that.
Israel is saying maybe a booster?
I think it was... WHO actually said there's not necessarily any need for it yet.
We'll see.
CDC is the one that's saying, yeah, we think we should do a booster.
And then I think the FDA is saying, we don't know.
So yes, no, we don't know.
But when you got that vaccine, let's say four months ago, you saw Fauci on TV saying, you don't need to worry about it.
That's why everyone got mad because people got vaccines and they were saying you're sending the wrong message to tell people to still wear masks.
So they said, if you're vaccinated, you don't need masks.
Well, now that changed.
So this is really a pandemic of people trusting government blindly and then regretting decisions.
Stick with your decision.
Look, anyone who decided not to get vaccinated, they're sticking with their decision.
You decided to get vaccinated and said, well, screw you, I'm vaccinated.
It'll kill off the conservative voting base.
Good.
Then let them die.
You can have what you want.
So going back to comedians now, Christopher Titus, who has been on the show, one of my early debates.
Uh-oh.
Comedian.
I like Titus, but I don't agree with... I don't like him and I don't find him funny, but I appreciate that... I'm being honest.
I think his stand-up's funny, but yeah, he's kind of an asshole.
I don't really think his stand-up is funny at all.
I think it used to be.
Anyway, but it doesn't matter.
Look, you can find him funny.
My point here is I'm going to go through a list of comedians now.
Emmy-nominated, Emmy-winning people who write for ABC, NBC, CBS, right?
The rebels attacking a fellow comedian who's just saying, I don't think I have the right to force you to be vaccinated.
Yeah, when we get to Colbert, I don't know if we want to throw comedians.
Yeah, it's true.
Yeah, we're throwing it around.
Christopher Titus says, I want you to come to my shows.
I want you to be vaccinated.
Don't come to my shows if you aren't.
If science, facts, and evidence doesn't sway you, you are too... Sorry, if you have kids watching, I'm going to give you... This is not a trigger warning.
It's that I don't want...
Three, two, you are too fucking stupid to get my jokes.
Enjoy Jim Brewer.
Yeah, because when I think Christopher Titus, I think highbrow.
Yeah, exactly.
Facts, evidence, Christopher Titus?
Do you mean like when you came on the show seven years ago and you had no idea as to how many defensive uses of firearms had taken place and didn't know what a semi-automatic was?
That's cute.
Stay with the buzz cut.
Laptop.
Laptop.
It works for ya.
No.
Well, that just pisses me off, too, when somebody comes out and says that.
It's like, why are you taking a shot at a guy for making a stand?
Well, here's Colbert writer Frank Lesser.
Well, I would say aptly named.
You suck!
You're nothing!
He says, I'd tell Jim Brewer to stick to comedy, but people are suffering enough already.
Oh, you son of a gun.
I wrote that for him.
Did it not land?
Emmy nominated.
It landed perfect.
Emmy nominated this man.
Wow.
Wow.
Comedian, I guess, Frank Conniff tweeted, Well, it's, in fairness, to be Emmy nominated for a late show, don't they just, aren't there just four slots?
Yeah.
It's like a 25% chance.
It's pretty much a participation nomination.
As long as they keep us out of the fold.
You can't be nominated even though you double their numbers.
Once we get the amount of COVID cases down to Jim Brewer's fan numbers, we can finally put the pandemic behind us.
Well then good!
I don't even know what this... Is this supposed to... Once we get the amount of COVID cases down to Jim Brewer's fan numbers, that's way too high!
Yeah, it's pretty low.
If you're talking about the amount of people at Jim Brewer shows, you're talking about thousands of people at every single show, you want to get the caseload down to like tens of thousands per day?
You mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger, love!
Then Letterman writer Ben Schwartz tweeted, America needs laughter now more than ever.
So Jim Brewer refusing to perform is great news.
And Keith Olbermann got in on it.
How about this?
You guys, I don't want to offer a challenge for Jim Brewer.
You guys pick a venue in the same town on the same night as Jim Brewer.
Let's see who fills it up.
Because this is the only argument they have, right?
I see Christopher Titus at least attempting.
It's the same joke over and over again.
Because this is anytime somebody takes a stand.
They want to just say you're irrelevant and that's it.
Right.
Because they don't know what else to say.
They're all parrots of each other.
Right.
You're not popular.
That's the argument, which, by the way— That's odd.
He's on Tucker Carlson.
Yeah.
And he's playing theaters, but okay.
But you know what?
It's also—let's say he wasn't popular.
Science isn't determined—truth isn't determined by consensus.
It's determined by what's right.
That being said, you want to know who the bullies are?
I don't think there's anything more bullish than Hey, hey, hey, hey, look, look, look, nobody likes you,
they like us.
And it's even sadder when it's a lie.
You're like, hey, no one likes you, everyone likes us, where did they all go?
And just a ring around the other side going, fight, fight, fight, fight.
Truth is determined by...
Trust me, they're around, okay.
Yeah, truth is determined by hindsight, not piling on somebody.
I know.
This is just really sad to me.
Well, it sounds a little desperate to me, too.
Like, oh, they're like, oh, he's trending.
Let's, let's jump in on that.
And I'll, I'll look like I'm a rebel.
I don't want to say that this, this is the kind of thing that needs to scare everybody.
Because this is someone, what is his crime?
His crime is literally saying, hey, I'm just switching to venues that allow you to be vaccinated or not be vaccinated.
That's all.
I just want to perform at venues that offer you a choice and don't force you to get jabbed by the government.
And people who are supposed to be the defenders of freedom of speech and people who are supposed to be the last vanguard of truth are saying, no, no, you must Take part in forcing everyone to be vaccinated.
Let's be clear about the arguments.
Jim Brewer is saying, all I want is for you to have a choice, and hey, that's what you guys said you wanted.
Choice, right?
Let the unvaccinated die off.
Continue with the decision that you made when you got the jab.
The opponents here are saying, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Every single independent comedian must join the guild and force every American who wants to go out and enjoy comedy, restaurant, any kind of music show.
Right now it happened with my parents, I think a Michael Buble show.
You have to take part in forcing everyone to be vaccinated.
By the way, Heartbeat Bill is outrageous.
And you guys, you guys comment here, uh, this to me is, the reason, comedy is a weatherstick, and it's a club I've not wanted to be a part of for years because of this.
It is amazing.
I don't think there are people who are more spineless right now in this country than comedians, and that's because of The Gatekeepers.
Like you said, there are four shows.
You cannot get in there.
Unless you either meet a diversity quota or have the right point of view.
I would be stunned if you could find 2% conservative or Republicans working in all elections.
Conan isn't even on the air anymore.
It's all changed.
The playing field's done.
The idea that even if you want late night, what do you want to get out of it?
There's nothing there anymore.
And you have an announcement to make because this kind of forced you to look into, because
keep in mind Jim Brewer didn't know, the reason this change happened is he didn't know the
venues set these rules.
And that's kind of out of your control, and then that forced you, right, to do some digging.
I don't want to speak for you.
No, it's the same.
It's fans had been reaching out and telling me that they couldn't attend my shows because they weren't comfortable with the vaccine.
It was the exact same thing.
I don't need to know your medical history for you to come to my show.
I simply make sure I ask, I go, please don't have AIDS.
Right.
That's a good rule.
Which is fine.
Right.
Especially if you're a gymnastics coach.
Well, that's how it is.
That's how it starts.
The FBI...
Ignored a lot of tips, not just the ones on Larry Nassar's fingers.
But here we go!
So you've cancelled some shows?
I'm cancelling a show right now.
There are a few that are in California that obviously I would have known about.
Which show are you cancelling?
I'm cancelling the Stifle Theatre in Salina, Kansas on October 22nd.
We're going to look for a new venue.
They will give you a full refund, don't worry about that.
If you did buy tickets, I know a lot of people did.
But I had received a lot of emails from your area of people just saying that they were not able to attend because of the health restrictions.
And when my agent booked it, that was not part of it.
This was all of a sudden added.
I started getting all these emails and personally, I just don't agree with it.
Well, also, it's like, look, and I hope people out there, again, you can comment, I know some of you are getting the short end of the stick if you bought tickets, but... You'll get money back.
You're gonna get your money back, but they don't get to see you, which is really what matters to them.
I'm hoping to find a nearby venue.
Right.
And hopefully we can.
No, but the thing is here, who do you want to be getting, who, look...
Someone is not going to get to see the show.
The point is, Dave, now, understanding the policy of these theaters, I think we want as many people to be able to enjoy it as possible, not limit it.
So I hope people out there understand.
And you do have a show, though, coming up still at Carnegie Music Hall in Homestead on October 1st.
Yes, and then Albany, New York.
Albany, New York.
Not this weekend, but next.
Okay I'll be there and yeah I this is just something where I and I let me be very very clear to anybody out there who's gonna attack me.
I'm pro-vaccination.
I grew up in a house with a nurse for a mom.
I completely think vaccinations are a wonderful thing.
I believe in medicine.
I don't think you should give tree sap to a kid who has meningitis.
But I do think that this is not We have not gotten the proper answers on what this is and a lot of people are uncomfortable and for private personal reasons some people can't take the vaccine.
That is none of my business and if you're vaccinated I don't think you should be worried about getting it if it works.
Right.
So my own personal opinion is your medical history should not keep you from coming to the show unless there's not a wheelchair ramp and then I would have one put in.
Right.
Yeah, exactly.
Because you're not going to use your legs like a sucker.
No.
I'm not going to watch you drag it up the stairs with your mouth.
Although that would be a good opener.
That's impressive.
The MC.
Have you seen it?
Dude, I'd like to.
It's a funny bit.
Alright, so you guys can go and check out the show date.
So we wanted to give that the attention it deserved in Jim Brewer.
Hopefully we can get him on the show.
Jim's a great guy, and that's really what bothers me.
Anybody who's saying that he's jumping on a bandwagon, this is like you said, he's a born-again Christian.
This was in his book years ago.
He's the real deal.
He's jumping off the bandwagon.
Exactly.
He's a genuine person.
This is not an act.
And he genuinely sells out theaters, and he is popular, so it's not a valid argument.
It wouldn't be a valid argument anyway.
It's an intellectual fallacy argument, uh, I don't know, ad populum, ad pop, whatever
it is, the Latin term.
The point is arguing from a place of most of the people agree with me is just one of
the intellectual fallacies as old as time.
And it's the only attack that they have.
And it just is ironic that people who no one likes are making that argument.
But you know what?
They feel like they've got the cool kids backing them up.
Hey, hope you like that, America.
I hope you see the difference between the elites.
The problem is, again, unelected elites.
You're a former Emmy writer for Stephen Colbert, who hasn't even been funny in four years accidentally.
I know, he used to be so good on Comedy Central.
I know.
But I really do enjoy the home Zoom talk shows.
Those are great.
I could watch those all day.
Love laughing at them.
You really realize when it was boiled down there, you know, to the bare essentials during the COVID, how truly talentless.
Well no, it's like turning the lights on at a nightclub that's always dark and you're like, oh wow, this place looks really terrible.
All the bells and whistles are gone.
The lady you're dancing with.
I can see now.
Oh my god!
This is a mess.
This is a mess.
You're all a mess.
I thought this was great with the lights and the dark lights.
What kind of filters do you have on that black light?
Should have picked that up.
Nassar!
Oh, I should have known you were here, Nassar.
You rascal.
You wet scallion.
All right, so before we move on to talking about the FBI and Nicki Minaj, this is a, a shoeless Lyft driver was enraged, what you're about to watch, furious at a request to, and this is also why I hate that Lyft and Uber rate passengers, That, to me, is Black Mirror-esque.
Look, you shouldn't be rating passengers just because now passengers can't even discuss issues that might... Like, if I'm in a car with my wife, I go, shh, don't talk politics.
We might get one-starred.
That's so bizarre.
It's like a Chinese social credit system.
That's awesome.
Also, many of the drivers are probably a part of the Chinese social credit system, enraged that they, grammatically impossible, but I don't know the pronoun, they were asked to go the speed limit.
Here you go.
You know, I'm just trying to ask you to go to speed limit as long as... I'm saying I'm gonna go... Is that a woman?
Yes.
We confirm.
I believe.
Okay.
You guys aren't trying to embarrass me that's a woman?
Theoretically.
Hey, I'm gonna have to open that trunk.
An aggressive woman.
I'm not going anywhere until you open that trunk.
I'm mentally ill.
Do you have caution tape?
Yeah, the caution tape means you should not get in the car.
She pulled up.
If that wasn't the first tip off, the Dementor Scream should have sealed the deal.
Oh wow.
Get a hard case on there, it's okay.
Me too.
Okay, alright, hold on a second.
Okay, your parents' divorce was your fault.
She speeds off!
Oh yeah, I hope my dad just had a talk with her like, me and your mom are getting separated and just so you know, this is all you.
It's all you and your Christopher Titus haircut and your banshee screaming.
That's why we don't have sex anymore.
That's why she's been so close to my touch for so long.
I will never see you again.
I will never forgive you for our divorce.
Just so you know, I'm going to front load this for you.
Your therapist is going to say, it's not your fault.
Hey, hey, hey, hey, look at me.
It's all your fault.
Crocs suck.
She wasn't even wearing Crocs.
She threw them away.
She was shoeless.
The Crocs are too much!
They're constraining me!
I can't, with my spider veins, my varicose veins, I gotta go shoeless!
The way God intended!
You know she's got a pair of Doc Martens steel toes.
Gonna toss on her Birkenstocks and hit Nick DiPaolo backstage.
What was in Shotgun, though, by the way?
Was that like a blow-up doll?
I have no idea.
I thought it was like a clown, like a blow-up clown.
It's so you can use the carpool lane.
That must be what it is, right?
It's right.
That's what I think it is too.
No way.
There's a lot of red flags.
Don't get in that car.
The whole thing is a red flag.
The entire thing.
If I walked in and there were an Arab man named Mohammed with a pressure cooker next to him, it wouldn't be more suspicious than that lady who was shoeless with caution tape and the Christopher Titus haircut.
And just to be clear, this is emblematic, the reason I want to show this, of why we are where we are in our country.
When people say we're divided because of Donald Trump, no, the reason we're divided is because we are saying the exact same thing and reacting to it differently.
So right there, they both go, she goes, I got this all on camera!
And he's like, yeah, so do I. So in other words, he's thinking, huh, thank God I've got this on camera that the lady making the Dementor screams in the Christopher Titus haircut with the caution tape who's shoeless refuses to go the speed limit.
And she's like, thank God I got it on camera that those assholes want me to put on shoes and go the speed limit!
Well, she's wearing a mask to keep herself safe, but she's not gonna go the speed limit to keep herself safe.
Does that make any sense?
Ah, depends.
She's probably the one who just walks around with a diaphragm for safety.
Oh, I'm sure.
Everybody wants a piece of this!
Got it all on camera!
I can't give it to everybody!
And when you shut off the lights in the nightclub, it's like Jessica Alba.
Oh, yeah.
No.
It's hard to tell the difference.
Gotta get some drinks in you first.
A lot.
Like, you have to be blind drunk.
Yes.
Like a fifth.
Blackout drunk.
Yeah.
A handle.
Even the people going hog hunting are like, I mean, I don't want to be a hog with rabies.
No, they just, they'll go home and make some mac and cheese and touch themselves.
Yes.
Ow!
Hey, whatever harms people less.
Mac and cheese.
Oh, yeah.
Well, listen.
I love mac and cheese.
It's a craft meal when you're drunk.
That's the best part of that story.
Stouffer's.
When you're drunk.
Which could really be an ad for anything that's aggressively mediocre.
That's true.
Olive Garden!
No.
No, when you're dead.
When you're never good.
Oh, endless salad and breadsticks?
Wow, so I can get as much crap as I want?
What a deal!
That was, you know, Jesus hosted the last supper at the Olive Garden, that was his last miracle.
Never-ending breadsticks!
Christ, what a deal!
This is delightful!
Couldn't they have been better?
And never-ending salad!
And some lasagna sticks, and you're like, what is that?
He's like, I don't know.
I'm about to die, let's not sweat the details here.
Missing the point, bros.
Bennegan's is closed.
I didn't know they went under.
What, you want to go to Applebee's?
Applebee's, no.
Oh, well, you know what?
Jesus, they do have 2 for 20.
You're going to betray me three times before the 2 for 20 hits the table, Peter.
So, this is a question I also have for you, too.
You know, Nicki Minaj is in the news.
And I'll show you, this is why this matters.
It's not just trending because Nicki Minaj, and I'm not a fan, and I'm not getting behind Nicki Minaj saying that Nicki Minaj is base, but Nicki Minaj just came out and said anything about the vaccination and said something that wasn't even complimentary but neutral about Tucker Carlson, and everyone in the media has jumped and attacked, which to me is, I would say, bizarre but truly expected.
Well, it's a bit odd when just a couple days ago she was a black woman who was a singer that you all admired, And now that she has an opinion that isn't even an opinion, she's asking some questions.
Right.
Is now what makes it that you hate her.
And what's so funny is that the left goes, Oh, all conservatives don't like... Oh wait, is that Megan Thee Stallion WAP?
Yeah, that's Megan Thee Stallion.
Well, seriously, why were you taking health advice from a woman that sings raps about ass-eating?
I'm serious!
And is like 400 pounds.
Right, there's no reason that you should have been like, well, why isn't she... That's Lizzo.
Well, this is what's funny, if it's... Oh, I don't know.
Is Nicki Minaj not big?
Well, her booty... Oh, she got a big booty.
Her booty's big, yeah.
Well, okay, so she had it installed.
That's a good thing.
This is Nicki Minaj, Bernie 98.
But the point is, they will take health advice from someone who is overweight to say big and beautiful, hey, you can't judge them.
However, if someone says, ooh, I don't know about the long-term effects of the vaccine, that all of a sudden discredits them.
People who say we shouldn't have disclosure laws for HIV, for AIDS in California, that's the actual law.
You can bang a stranger and not let them know that you have AIDS.
It's actually criminal for them to ask you about it.
You can be 400 pounds, you can have a BMI of blood type pudding, and I realize that I'm mixing up analogies here with BMI blood type, but understand blood type is on the brain because of the rona that I'm going through, or not going through.
It's not rare.
The point is, then it's a bridge too far when they just say, I don't know about the vaccine.
I'm not sure.
You ain't black.
You didn't think this person was not a qualified medical professional when you couldn't fit them in a rowboat?
Wasn't she the one talking about making sure, like, you know, to have something on your fingers after, like, being a guy?
Was that Nicky?
I kicked him.
No, no, no, no, no.
That's Cardi B. Oh, there's another one.
So we have Cardi B, Nicki Minaj, Megan Thee Stallion.
Lizzo, disgusting.
Cardi B is the one that says terrible sexual things and interviewed the president.
That's right, that's right, it's Cardi B. Also WAP.
Sorry.
What a stupid world.
I know.
Anyway, sorry.
And it's funny, again, we're seeing the same thing where the left goes, conservatives, oh you're mad about what?
Again, if you have kids, yeah, you know what?
I don't want my kids listening to wet-ass pussy.
And then we go, oh, wait a second, you want to cancel somebody because they believe that they should make their own choice when it comes to vaccination?
Again, we're saying the same things, we're just lying.
How do you solve that?
How do you solve the Lyft fight, where people are going, yeah, you should go to the speed limit?
She's going, I can't believe you want me to go to the speed limit!
How do you solve that divide where you're saying, yeah, I think a heartbeat, Bill, you're stopping a heartbeat that's not your own, and they go, I can't believe you're going to stop us from shopping!
How do you solve the problem of the divide?
I don't know.
I don't think 400 pounds is healthy.
I don't think wet-ass pussy is good for children.
I don't think that the woman who's talking about cleaning her asshole with a fingernail should be interviewing the President.
Oh my God!
I can't believe that same person said that we don't have long-term effects on vaccinations!
How do you solve the divide?
It's not because of Trump.
It really isn't.
And I don't care.
I'm glad there's a line in the sand now.
Well, because you don't have to agree with everything somebody does.
Right.
And just because you've pigeonholed somebody into a category and you believe they know everything they think doesn't mean you're right about it.
Right.
Or not think, which is why this Nicki Minaj story is very painful.
Yes.
Nobody wanted this.
So yesterday, Nicki Minaj went on Twitter Rampage.
Most notably, she tweeted out a clip of Tucker Carlson defending her.
And of course, leftist streamers, I guess, and Twitterers, I don't know what qualifies what right now.
This is why it's so hard where someone asked my wife what I do, and my wife's like, I guess he hosts a podcast like my husband, too.
Okay.
Sure.
You know what I mean?
It's all the same.
We should just start calling you a streamer.
Yeah, just call me a streamer, I guess.
That'll get me some space to do what we do.
Just don't call me late night host.
I just use Florentine's line if I'm getting a haircut, which is, what do you do?
Oh, I cut lawns, and then all of a sudden they have no more questions.
So they came after her saying that she went on a white supremacist, white nationalist show, and all she said was, right, I can't speak to Nicki Minaj talking about Tucker Carlson, agree with, even look at someone from a particular political party, people aren't human anymore.
This is being sarcastic and misspelled.
If you're black and a democrat tells you to shove marbles up your ass, you simply have to.
If another party tells you to look out for that bus, stand there and get hit.
You know how many US presidents were white supremacists?
Oh please, just stay on topic.
Y'all can't do that.
The topic is, asking questions is OK.
But let's make the topic, Nikki wants to talk to white racists so that all you can sleep better tonight.
Dummies.
Did no one else do the marbles?
I was wondering where she got that.
Well, it's really hard to know now what's a prescription versus advice.
Right.
I know, I don't even know anymore.
But I do know they are horse marbles.
Yeah.
Yeah, well, you shouldn't use the marbles that you're supposed to, you know, kick the other marbles with.
Those were bocce balls.
Oh.
Also, you didn't have to reach back into your pog collection.
I've noticed all the slammers are missing.
That's what they call it.
Yeah, the slammer.
And this is the media, and just so you know, this isn't, this is where you see, this is not just trending on Twitter.
The media and everyone including Late Night and Actual News have responded to attack the woman they were praising.
To attack Nicki Minaj, I'm not a Nicki Minaj fan, and I think she'll probably come out and say something crazy not very long from now, but taking this on its own is very reasonable.
She's just saying, look, I can't even agree with someone individually, and you're just going to accuse everyone of being a white supremacist, and you'll do anything Democrats tell you to do?
She's not even saying that she's a Republican.
I think it's very reasonable, and so I think that when we talk about how you determine what's true and what's not when we're all saying the same thing, I think a big part of what you have to do, a part of your litmus test, has to be How vitriolic is the reaction?
Is it proportional to the original statement?
Because look at how they're responding to what Nicki Minaj said.
And people like Nicki Minaj, I have to say this.
You have a platform, sister, that is 22 million followers.
Okay?
I have 2 million followers.
You have 22 million followers on Twitter for you to use your platform to encourage our community to not protect themselves and save their lives.
My God, sister, you could do better than that.
You've got that platform.
It's a blessing.
How can health authorities even attempt to combat this kind of misinformation coming from somebody who is a huge and beloved international star like Nicki Minaj?
Beloved?
Well, it got huge, right?
It's very difficult.
There is a lot of misinformation, mostly on social media.
And the only way we know to counter miss and disinformation is to provide a lot of correct information.
She should be thinking twice about why are you talking propagating information that really has no basis as except a one off anecdote.
Sexiest man in the world in front of the Guardian.
Vouching.
And I especially don't want Nicki Minaj doing her own research.
Party, vouching.
Your daddy won't get the vaccine because his friend got it and became impotent.
His testicles became swollen.
Of course, your cousin's friend is a much more trusted source
than all of the world's doctors.
And I especially don't want Nicki Minaj doing her own research,
because I don't want to wait 10 years for her next album while she finishes up medical school.
Now, here's the problem.
The problem is for a lot of Nicki Minaj's followers, millions of followers, that tweet about swollen balls, that'll be their research.
It will be their research.
Born a crime, still a crime.
This is what's interesting.
Look at the theme.
The problem is social media.
The problem is that people can express independent thoughts no matter how moderate they may be.
So if that's the problem, that tells you what their solution is.
And that's what's going to bring us to the FBI conversation a little later on.
Fauci?
Colbert?
No, we're saying, Joy Reid?
I only got 2 million followers!
Well, that's too too many.
I'm surprised she had that many, honestly.
Like, wow, really?
You do?
I mean, it's just kind of a lol cow, so it's like, they have money at MSNBC to buy stuff.
Well, two million's company, three's a reich.
So, I just, I just, you know, this is the rea- that what they want to do is make sure someone out there, Big Tech, are you listening?
Are you listening?
And by the way, in case you're wondering, YouTube right now, you watch this show, guess what?
You're gonna get a Seth Meyers clip autoplaying despite having never chosen one of his clips!
No!
Say it's not so. Ever. That's what's going to happen. They want to go, ooooh, Nicki Minaj.
Turn up the WAP. Turn down the, hey, maybe we should question authority. Turn up the,
Dr. Fauci, sexiest man in the world. Turn down the, hey, you know what, maybe it's not my role
as a comedian to force you to get vaccinated. This is where we are. We used to think that
social media actually allowed us to bypass gatekeepers, and now they have become the
most powerful gatekeepers who have ever existed because they're worried about losing their
You were about to say something before.
Well, it's just that you have 74%-ish of the black community that's not vaccinated, which means that they have questions.
And then you have all these supposedly left-wing talk show hosts that have spent the last two years saying that they're completely for the black people.
But the second that they have an opinion or even a question that goes against what their narrative might be, all of a sudden everybody turns on them.
Right.
And that's what I just find to be disgraceful.
And with Cole Barrett, it's like, do you think when Nicki Minaj asking a question is somehow more egregious than, I don't know, a dancing cartoon needle saying, let's all go to the doctors, let's all go, like, which is what he literally did.
Yeah.
It's like you're pushing something that you don't understand either.
She doesn't understand it and wants answers.
So you cut to Fauci, which, by the way, this is now perfectly acceptable to have two rich white old dudes.
Yeah.
Trashing a black woman.
Totally fine in this situation.
But again, Fauci, no answer for her question.
Just, I think it's dangerous that she has people who might listen to her opinion.
Why do you think that, Dr. Fauci?
Because it's dangerous for people to listen to mine!
Yeah!
I mean, have you heard the things I said?
Don't wear a mask.
Wear a mask.
Don't go outside.
Go outside.
It's aerosol.
It's not aerosol.
The vaccine means that it's secure.
Actually, it's just protection.
Then I change protection.
I'm full of shit all the time, and you keep asking me, have you even done your basic research on what I said about AIDS?
It's a miracle that I- If you woulda just have a monkey with a dartboard, he'd be more correct about AIDS!
It's anal sex and dirty needles!
I don't know how it missed me!
You don't have to think about it, dude.
You were about to say something, Joe.
Sorry.
So, no, I'm a puppet and I look like a puppet.
Why didn't they make me, I said specifically, make me look like a not-puppet?
They must have not heard the not part!
Look what Trevor Noah just did.
He set up this dynamic that I think is it's really frightening because you don't know where it's going to stop.
He basically said her followers are too stupid to do any additional research based on the claim that she made of something that happened to somebody that she knew, right?
She didn't say that this is like all of it.
She didn't say this is the only reason.
She basically just made a comment.
He said all of her followers are just going to go through that.
So Trevor, what's the solution?
His solution to that is, oh, you have to just trust us.
Yeah.
You have to trust all of the gatekeepers because you're too dumb to do the research.
You're too stupid, black people, to go out and get a license.
You can't possibly be made to do that.
You're too stupid when you have an opinion against Republicans, you have to just be called an Uncle Tom or you have to be called a black white supremacist.
Weird, right?
Or you're Nicki Minaj and your fans are too stupid to know the difference between something that's your opinion and something that's medical Yeah, and two important points that I want to make here.
Our criticisms, for example, where we've been accused of being racist against Black Lives Matter, the organization.
Against black organizations who take advantage of their black voting base.
This, right now, is people just attacking Nicki Minaj, saying, how dare you do this, you're not black enough.
Also, she said, I knew some, and I think it's kind of stupid, I knew a friend from Trinidad and Tobago who got big-ass balls!
I'm not taking that!
That's not that smart!
Maybe the guys from Barbados.
We don't know.
The point is, Is that any more dangerous than Fauci saying breakthrough cases are very rare?
Yeah.
That was anecdotal.
He couldn't have had that info.
Well, we know that's not true anymore.
Well, we know it's not true.
I'm not saying that they happen at an old... Well, yeah, you know what?
I am saying it.
Lotofcreditor.com.
All references.
Mayo.
The Moderna shot.
Either the Moderna or Pfizer against the Delta variant.
50,000 people in a sample study.
Divided by rage.
By rage.
By rage.
Pretty much.
Divided by race, age, gender.
Pretty well controlled.
Mayo, 42% effective.
Okay, so Fauci's saying there are no breakthrough cases, too.
They're rare.
Is that not a more dangerous anecdote?
Why aren't we saying, hey, Fauci's being irresponsible because that'll stop people from doing research, as opposed to Nicki Minaj.
My uncle's balls got big!
Yeah, but she's not Ben Carson.
She's not Larry Elder.
What this is, is they're actually upset because they thought they had somebody in their pocket and they don't.
Just like Kanye.
It's just an anger thing.
It's just an anger thing.
Well, and play the tape to the end, guys.
Put aside your political leanings.
Play the tape to the end.
Do you want to be like Communist China?
Do you want to be like Nazi Germany in the 1930s?
Yes, they do.
Yes, they do.
No!
They want to end up there.
That's exactly where you end up.
I wouldn't support a Republican who right now went out and said, Do not, under any circumstances, get vaccinated.
I would not support that because there are people who do need to get vaccinated.
You should have just stopped at, do they want to be communist China?
Because judging by the phone sex call logs between Millie and China... That's true.
It's weird when the transcript starts out with, what are you wearing?
Yeah.
The same uniform?
Yeah.
Do you have on your medals?
1-800-CHINA-36.
All right, what are you wearing?
Are you wearing a first place ribbon?
Bring me Swalwell!
By the way, speaking of all this, you can follow us on those hellholes.
Follow me, louder, on Instagram and on TikTok, trying to fight the communist Chinese where they lie.
And hit the notification bell if you're watching here on YouTube.
The best thing you can do, though, is just tune in live.
It's a live show Monday through Thursday, 10 a.m.
Eastern.
This week we've had some YouTube screwy, so we've had to start late.
It's been a little weird.
We apologize.
We'll be taking your chat on Mug Club later on, talking about our first crushes, which is an interesting conversation.
All right, before we move on here to the FBI, I just had to hit this.
Disney is celebrating.
Hashtag gotta look down and read this.
It would be so much easier if I had a prompter like over there.
Hispanic Latinx Heritage Month.
And they tweeted out, happy hashtag Hispanic Latinx Heritage Month.
Never forget the value of family time and remembering where you come from.
Hey Disney, do you know how I know your Twitter manager's white?
Basically.
Exhibit A. Remember, we went out and asked, they find it offensive.
There are polls that find people who are actually Latin, Latin American, find it offensive.
They don't use this.
It's only white feminist bitches.
The fact that the Mexican character looks like it's from Mad Magazine?
Yes.
And in a strange move, actually, though, too, Disney actually followed it up with this one, which was ill-received.
Yeah, maybe distasteful.
If you're listening on audio, you might want to go over to Mug Club or YouTube.
Thank you, you guys got it.
The recent Gallup poll found only 4% of Latinos like the term Latinx.
Wow! 4%! All from California. Yeah, exactly.
I guarantee you they're just part. At what point do you say it's social
engineering?
When only 4% of the people you're claiming to not try and offend
actually agree with you?
You're trying to force their hand.
You're trying to force their hand into agreeing with you.
You've managed to divide Mexicans from Mexicans.
Yes!
Well, only 4%.
What is that noise?
Are you guys hearing that?
What is that?
Guys, what's going on in the control room?
Do you guys hear that?
Seriously, that wasn't...
Do you guys hear that?
Did you guys hear that?
What was that?
Ho, ho, ho.
Gun Santa?
In the suit.
Ha, ha, ha.
But how'd you get in here, Gun Santa?
We don't have a chimney.
Ho, ho, ho, Stephen.
Gun Santa doesn't need a chimney!
Now, Steven, I heard you were a very good boy this year.
Thank you.
Wow, it's the new Walther PDP!
I don't have this one!
What's wrong, Steven?
This is great and all, Gunsan.
I just wish that all my friends could have perfect triggered and ergonomic, class-leading firearms, too.
Oh, but Steven... They already do.
Whoa!
Whoa!
I got a Walther PPS!
I heard it's the best one.
Walter P.D.P.!
It does exist.
Whoa, I got a P.P.S.
too!
I'm gonna be so safe now.
I got a Walter P.P.K.S.
and bullets!
Thanks, Gun Santa.
I've never held a gun before.
Ho, ho.
What's your name, little one?
Carlito.
Gracias por el Walter, Sr.
Gun Santa.
That's no problem, Carlos.
Where are you from?
Juárez.
Juárez, Mexico.
Okay, maybe next year, son.
Open up, you racist scum!
We finally found the racist secret hideout!
What's happening?
Steven, you have a show to do.
Let Gun Santa handle this.
This is a stand your ground stage.
And look, now it has a red dot.
That is the power of Christmas magic.
Just so you know, people, is it unloaded?
Yeah, it's unloaded.
Really happy to have the sponsor.
You know, Walter was a sponsor for a long time, and just to be clear, the reason they weren't is they couldn't keep up with inventory.
That does hurt, because so many people, you guys were supporting them, and they sold out of firearms.
But they're back now, and this is their new firearm since they're back, this Walter PDP.
Believeable.
Look, I've always said this.
It's like BMW, Mercedes at a certain point.
Like, I'm not going to crap on other guns out there.
There are plenty of good guns.
I just recommend that you try the Walther.
It is Google.
Just run a search.
Bing.
Sorry.
Find that little paper clip.
Don't do it.
Your bonsai buddy.
Purple gorilla.
Just search Walther PDP review.
You will not find a negative review.
The trigger is amazing.
The ergonomics are incredible.
And they have these serrations.
Even if your hands They are oily, like mine in the show.
They're machined into the slide.
Beautiful.
So, it is an incredible firearm, and we are really happy to have them here.
You can go to, is it waltherarms.com?
Waltherarms.com, or just go to your local gun retailer, firearm retailer, and just try the Walther.
If you don't like it, don't buy it.
Just try it.
That's all.
Alright.
I love it.
Let's move on to the FBI here.
So, the FBI is in the news.
Having a rough week?
Yeah, you could say.
Having a rough go, the FBI.
Eh, what are you gonna do?
They probably were the reason for a lot of parents' divorces.
Let's start with one of the reasons they're in the news, and then go through the difference between the FBI and the stories that you've heard as served up.
Oh, right now they're talking about it on CNN.
Well, that's nice, but they won't talk about the other stuff with the FBI.
So let's show what they're showing you, and then the subtext you're missing.
Oh, and that's actually perfect.
Fencing surrounds U.S.
Capitol ahead of far-right rally.
Here's the thing.
I've been accused along with Ben Shapiro of being the gateway to white supremacy.
I don't know anybody who's going to this far right.
I don't know anyone who's talked about it at all.
I want to hear from you.
Do you know anyone who's going?
Do any of you plan on attending?
This is theater, right?
Just like Men Menstruating, it's period kabuki theater.
This is domestic violence kabuki theater.
Guys, I made sandwiches.
We got a yeti cooler.
We're gonna take a road trip.
Sorry, Dave.
I have a tent that sleeps six.
It's like from Congo where you throw it up and it goes poof.
Dave, there's 15 of us though.
Oh, I know.
That's Biden's pile on.
So this is what they go, look, FBI, we know what's going on.
The FBI failed with the United States gymnasts.
We're going to trust the FBI and CIA, though, telling us about this far-right violence, right?
Well, here's the thing.
Half those members or 75% of the people attending may be in the FBI.
And I will explain to you why.
Numbers, facts, statistics that we have all available at loudmouthcounter.com.
So let's first start off.
You can't expect them to get this right when the money was reallocated to the fake kidnapping fund.
This is true.
Which really is surprising that they labeled it that.
Put it in a trust!
So, members of the USA Gymnastics, they testified.
This is what you've seen.
In the Senate, Larry Nassar's abuse.
Michaela Maroney, I believe this was yesterday, had this to say, and it's still kind of ongoing.
After telling my entire story of abuse to the FBI in the summer of 2015, not only did the FBI not report my abuse, but when they eventually documented my report, 17 months later, they made entirely false claims about what I said.
Why are public servants whose job is to protect getting away with this?
This is not justice.
Enough is enough.
Today, I ask you all to hear my voice.
I ask you, please, do all that is in your power to ensure that these individuals are held responsible and accountable for ignoring my initial report, for lying about my initial report, and for covering up for a child molester.
And this is the problem with the FBI, this is the problem with the CDC, this is the problem with Millie.
You know what's required for there to be accountability?
Is that girl to stand up against the system.
Is this show to stand up against the system.
Do you know what's required to keep your elected officials accountable?
The ballot box.
Assuming it's not moving where you're trying to vote and it goes... Was this ballot box a droid?
I can't... Oh, Republican ticket!
Or some guy standing behind you has 80 million.
Right!
And a guy standing before you has a beret and a billy club.
That's really just a... they're blocking Nicki Minaj.
Who are you voting for, Trump?
And then they just point you at a trash can and you're like, is this where this goes usually?
Yeah, that's where it is.
Put it in there.
It's new.
It's the Model 4.2.
It looks like a recycle bin.
I told them to change that shit, but what you gonna do?
So Larry Nassar was a USA Gymnastics doctor accused of abuse by 156 women.
Wow.
That's Bill Cosby times Bill Cosby.
That's two Bill Cosby.
No, that's more.
Is it almost squared?
It's Bill Cosby squared.
It's the exponent.
Is it almost squared?
It's Bill Cosby squared.
It's Bill Cosby.
It's like if Bill Cosby died and Satan really wanted to play a cruel trick on him, he would
show him like a matrix of heaven and Bill would be like, oh I only had like 35, now
I got 156 gymnasts to abuse.
And then he'd be like, Ha ha ha ha!
You're about to get raped yourself!
No!
No!
Guys, I think we need to be clear.
I discussed this the other day.
Bill Cosby, innocent man.
Yes, this is absolutely true.
So, 156 women.
Let me rapid-fire this so you guys get a full picture here.
2018, Nassar pled guilty to 10 counts of sexual abuse.
And we can bring this back up there, Angelo, so people can see it.
He began working at Michigan State University in 1997.
The FBI failed to report Maroney's testimony for 17 months.
At least 40 women and girls And keep in mind, this is gymnastics, so you're talking about girls.
17 months, that's the left's abortion plan.
Yes!
That's what they do in Virginia.
Get it?
They'll just keep you in a waste paper, waste, uh, waste paper.
They throw you out.
So, 40 women, 40 women and girls were molested after, after the FBI was made aware.
Wow.
So this is when they say, if you can save one life, and right now they're putting up, we're talking, right on CNN, look, bring this right up again, bring it right up, really quick, volume, just, just ramp it right up there.
Far-right rally, they're ready for all this.
You had Months!
You had over a year and 40 more women were raped, molested, assaulted.
You did nothing.
So now let's go into where the FBI does take credit when the media wants to praise them.
Right now.
Right now.
FBI, CIA, American Intelligence, heroes.
40 women who didn't need to be raped even though we already knew about it.
The rules are kind of murky.
Okay, this is not a one-off.
The Parkland shooter was reported to the FBI five months before the shooting.
They failed to report the tip to the Miami Bureau.
So this matters here because they don't do their job.
Does F stand for fail?
the FBI in 2020. The FBI interviewed the Boston bomber in 2011, two years before the bombing.
They investigated the Orlando Pulse nightclub shooter for 10 months before determining that
he wasn't a threat. Two of the 9-11 hijackers shared a hotel room with FBI informant,
or informants, before the attack. So this matters here because they don't do their job.
Does F stand for fail? I think it might. This is remarkable that this has been going on.
What was the nightclub shooting?
Wasn't he military?
No, it was the base shooting that they... Oh, you're talking about Fort Hood.
Yeah, no, nightclub was the gay nightclub.
Pulse shooting.
Oh, I remember.
So what they do is they say... Ruined my whole night.
That being said, at this same time, if I'm not mistaken, the guy who shot bin Laden is still on a no-fly list.
So the point is... That's correct.
They make plenty of rules up and they limit your freedoms.
Stephen Hayes was on a no-fly list.
I had a family member who was on a no-fly list because he had the name of someone else who was on the no-fly list who also shouldn't have been on the no-fly list.
The shooters, however, the molesters, get to go on unscathed raping 40 more women and now we're supposed to trust them when they say we need a fence up above the Capitol.
Yeah, if your name's John Smith, you're never traveling.
It's any basic name.
No, but I mean, the FBI didn't exactly have a clean record before this.
And again, you've delineated between the leadership of the FBI, good agents doing good fieldwork, and pushing pencils.
They tried to get Martin Luther King to kill himself.
They did, yes.
Well, I mean, allegedly.
Allegedly.
Allegedly.
But then, let's look at their victories.
Right, this is something, so remember BuzzFeed reported that Whitmer, right, there was a kidnapping plot.
That was a big thing.
Well, look, there were 14 militia members charged.
There were 12 FBI informants.
That means that almost half, almost half of the people involved, until the FBI came in, it was a drinking buddy club.
At what point, there's a difference between, like when we went into Antifa, it was just me and one producer, and a dozen Antifa members who handed him, accidentally, an ice pick, a knife, and said, hold on, let me go get my sawed-off shotgun, and I remember calling Ben Shapiro, this wasn't, didn't expect this to happen, in Utah!
You taught me that.
They gave me an ax pick.
Oh my word.
And then all of a sudden security just walks forward.
And they had no interest, by the way, a lot of the cops.
There was one person at the FBI who cared.
And I don't know what I'm allowed to talk about.
It didn't really go as far as we would have liked.
So 12 FBI informants versus 14 militia members charged.
Let's look at the case filings.
After militia member Adam Fox, he questioned the value of harming Whitmer, right?
So this is the non-FBI, like, I don't really want to harm Whitmer.
We want to do things like protest, you know, maybe scare her, cut her.
No, no, kidnapper.
Yeah.
That's what, come on guys, right?
The FBI informant Big Dan told them to shoot a round through the cottage window.
Who looked a lot like Dan Conner.
Did he?
Yeah.
I'm guessing.
F-ing place up north.
Send an F-ing round through the window.
You know?
This is, of course, what you hear in a call.
Big Dan.
FBI was the one.
So when you look at the evidence, it's the FBI informants who are the ones suggesting violence.
A lot of people are like, I don't know.
We just want to drink straws.
It's fire-brewed!
All beer is fire-brewed.
Don't be fooled by the marketing.
Big Dan encouraged Fox to coordinate with militia members in other states.
Here's all the sources available at loudmouthcutter.com.
He said, engage in a synchronized attack on governors in multiple states by all shooting rounds into the homes of the respective governors at the same time.
He suggested that the militia could detonate a binary explosive placed against Whitmer's cottage.
This is all coming from the FBI!
The 12 FBI members versus 14 militia members.
Read up on the case.
This is what happens.
The news says, there were these radical far-right militia members who were trying to shoot Whitmer.
And then they don't cover it.
Actually, later on, it was the FBI who was saying, shoot Whitmer.
The other guys were just like...
That seems a little bit extreme.
Well, and they're fighting tooth and nail right now so the transcripts of all the phone calls won't get out because you can't legally coax somebody into committing a crime.
Right.
Right?
That's crossing the line.
This is also important with the last Capitol, you know, the investigation in January 6th.
This is something people need to understand.
Republicans, and certainly I want an investigation, we want the investigation to also include the FBI and the Capitol Police.
Yeah.
Not just people who trespass.
Wrong to trespass!
You don't hold people for months.
Without due process for trespassing.
We set an investigation if we investigate all of it.
Because guess what?
Too many times this has happened.
As a matter of fact, the biggest Al-Qaeda plot in history is an example of this.
And I'm going to get to it in a second.
But this also happened with militia members in Virginia.
Big Dan, look, he appears again.
He told Special Agent Chambers via text that he intended to reach out to his target.
Mission is to kill the governor specifically.
To which Big Dan replied, that's on the first call.
I.e.
use drones or other means.
And the prosecution argued that the defense changed the meaning of these texts.
This is an argument writing, they did not let the exchange speak for themselves.
They inserted a period after specifically entirely changing the meaning.
The omitted context shows it was in fact a question because it was immediately followed by an answer.
Okay, these are the people who say that you shouldn't have the right to defend your home and property because of Militia.
Because they ignore an apostrophe.
Now grammar matters?
Now syntax?
No, no, no.
Saying we should detonate it and the response being like, yeah, detonate that shit.
See, it was a question response.
Yeah, but the response is the same as the question!
That seems like just more of an agreement between two pieces of shit at the FBI.
This is like if Whitey Bulger was the agent.
Right!
As opposed to the informant.
Which, by the way, they did a great job with that if we're naming stuff.
Yeah, if we're naming stuff.
Well, there's some good, you know, things.
We're not saying it's all bad.
No, Whitey Bulger was an informant who killed everyone, and then escaped, and then they found him in Malibu and then murdered him in prison.
Like I said, it's not all bad.
Someone killed him.
We have no idea and no evidence at all that anyone ever... Let's just be general.
There's no evidence that power corrupts.
They also claim that this couldn't be evidence of entrapment.
Why?
This was the argument from the FBI, right?
Because they never charge anyone with violence.
You may not know that.
The charge was kidnapping.
It wasn't to attempt murder.
It was kidnapping.
Because even when the cameras aren't rolling, the FBI has to admit, really, the only calls to shoot and lay pipe bombs were from our guys.
The most we can get them with is kidnapping.
Just like, oh, really, at the Capitol riot, the only person you shot was Capitol Police, who actually ducked out from his cover to shoot an unarmed lady with a clear line of view, seeing that she was unarmed.
So we really can only hit them with trespassing.
But you probably don't believe that, because you haven't heard the follow-up.
That's what the problem is.
They go, oh look, trying to shoot and blow up the governor.
You don't hear the follow-up unless you watch shows like this.
AOC, they screamed they were gonna rape her!
She wasn't even in the building.
Yeah.
She might not have even been in the same region.
So they claim it was an entrapment because the final plot, I quote, and the crime they are charged with was conspiracy to kidnap the governor.
Kidnap, not murder.
Let me move on to another one that a lot of people may not know.
The Liberty City 7.
This was a hoax, and it was an al-Qaeda plot that the FBI claimed to have foiled right in the years after 9-11.
So they're claiming victory in a lot of these.
The FBI goes on the news, just like Fauci, people who are unelected in positions of authority, and go, look!
We stopped an assassination attempt against Governor Whitmer!
And no one says, Were you the one attempting to assassinate Governor Lindner?
That would be my first question in any of these.
So the FBI informants, this was the biggest Al Qaeda victory of the FBI.
Do you guys remember this?
Yes.
But a lot of people don't know this.
And this is one of those things where someone like Alex Jones has talked about it because it's buried in other conspiracies that maybe aren't, that can't be proven or that aren't proven.
You can take this to the bank, go look at the resources available, now this is a matter of public record.
You heard the initial story and thought, good on us!
And I was dumb enough to think, hey, you know what, we're sticking it to Al-Qaeda.
Turns out we weren't as effective as we'd been led to believe, and that's why I think George Bush was a good man at that point, not a big fan.
FBI informants, you guys heard of it as the Liberty City Seven.
FBI informants, they basically manipulated seven black men, which I'm only saying it because it's relevant to them, into pledging allegiance to Al-Qaeda.
They coached them into committing crimes that they never intended to commit until the FBI showed up.
Wow.
And when you look at the transcripts and you look at the pressure, like we just saw with Whitmer, like, how about bullets to the window?
I don't want to do that.
How about pipe bomb near the cottage?
I don't really want to do that.
How about you fire shots into the air near the cottage?
I'm not really a gun guy.
I'm more of a drink beer rowboat guy and show up with a protest.
Maybe I won't wear a mask, at least not a double mask.
Can I just get you for murder?
So it was suggested That this was the largest Al-Qaeda plot ever busted by the FBI.
This is what you were told.
It was a total hoax.
I don't want to say total hoax.
They had people who were impressionable.
Let's say you have someone who's ready to protest.
Okay?
Let's say, for example, you have someone in January 6th.
The vast majority of people, hundreds of thousands, are there to protest because they believe that there have, at some point in American history, been some, you know, let's just say this, they believed the big lie that was pushed by Elizabeth Warren, by Hillary Clinton, by Jimmy Carter, by Amy Klobuchar, right?
They believed that big lie that election integrity was a problem.
They believed the big lie by the Democrats.
2018 big lie.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Pre.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. 2016.
And 18.
Basically always until 2020.
Big lie from Democrats.
So they believe the big lie from all the Democrats.
Bernie Sanders too.
They believe the big lie from the Democrats and that's why they showed up on January 6th.
And then you have a few people who are influenced and they go, oh yeah, no, you're just here to protest.
We're just here to protest.
Here's a fire extinguisher.
Hey, maybe I'll throw out a smoke bomb.
The point is you take people who are impressionable and you feed them false information and then they blame Donald Trump for division.
So, they were focusing on the Capitol rioters.
They have entire pages, by the way, just to give you an idea, dedicated to them on the website.
There are charges, YouTube videos of them, requests for information, and we can all rest easy at night, though, knowing that the FBI—these are their victories, by the way, that's what I want you to know, because I'm going to list their failures—they sent 15 agents to investigate the noose in Bubba Wallace's garage. Oh, well that's good. Yeah, the
garage door close rope. 15 of them, huh?
15 of them. Yeah. They sent in, I know he was a U.S. Marshal, so they sent in Tommy Lee Jones.
I want you to check every garage, house, outhouse, hen house, dog house, pen house, everything. It
turns out it's just a garage door closer. Well, I only got 15 agents on the way, so maybe you
should shoot the governor.
I was wondering why it was so small.
I just thought black people were tinier.
I just thought they were tinier, which didn't make sense considering I watched basketball.
Yeah, I don't know, just a tiny little noose.
My college roommate was Al Gore.
Fast fact, it's true.
I don't care!
Tommy Lee Jones was roommate with Al Gore.
Yes he was.
Now here's something else.
So they had 15 agents to Bubba Watkins' noose.
No investigation into, and this is something we broadcast live, remember Chas Chopp?
A lawless city in America, and the FBI did nothing.
But let's also get more specific, because they love to zero in on targets, right?
OK, Raz Simone, the guy who was captured on video handing AR-15s to underage people, committing gross violations of the law on camera, and committing threats of violence.
As far as we know, certainly the FBI hasn't clicked.
No investigation there, but don't believe your lying eyes.
Breaking news in the so-called Capitol Hill organized protest zone.
There's been yet another shooting early this morning.
Top security shot at those people in the Jeep after they ran into the barricades here.
Told there's another group they're meeting with there and then they'll be moving in a few minutes, so be ready.
That's so Raz.
Raz of jazz.
That's a 15-year-old.
Wow.
What a cool kid.
a summer
he's handing guns out from the truck his car ring out in this is the video of it
once again in the capitol hill protest zone in seattle the two people hit teenagers and one of them is dead
tonight there's a five hundred twenty five percent increase in
crime with chas just like we had a government grant for wrapping and that's
where you got the money exactly
Something else, too.
You know what else happened when we broadcast?
People may not know this.
You can go and watch.
We broadcast live.
We have a lot of new fans from Chaz.
It was Chop then Chaz.
Chaz then Chop.
They got very serious about that.
Right.
And we rented out Raz Simone's Airbnb, as Black Lives Matter warlords do.
And we declared it New Chaz.
And broadcast from their live, which was hysterical, and Chaz was really mad about it because we're not the FBI, we can't arrest them, so we figure we can piss them off a little bit by just putting the fear of God into them with the reality that they may not get their cleaning deposit back.
That's all we can do!
That's all we do.
But we did it!
I'm a goof!
So, the John Brown Gun Club.
there and they chased just so you guys know this is when the night turned
Court of Blackout you were there they chased you out with guns there were guys
following us in Chaz and they were supposedly heading to the the apartment
where Brendan no not supposedly that's what they said that's what they said
We don't need to say allegedly.
They said they were heading there.
They were on the way.
Unlike the FBI, we were able to intercept their direct correspondence, not only on Twitter, but I won't give you all of the details and the tools that we have at our disposal.
But this is an official group.
The John Brown Gun Club who commits acts of violence and plan them, stage them on a regular basis.
The FBI, as far as I know, hasn't claimed victory.
They're right there!
They're right there!
You don't need to send someone in and say, hey, maybe you guys should get guns to shoot the governor.
They're a gun club!
And they plan on shooting people!
So, this is the John Brown Gun Club attempting to violently attack our producers who are doing a goof.
Wow.
So, Quarterback Garrett, where are you now?
Shh.
Bel-Air.
Shh.
I'm trying to reposition.
Oh, wow.
Something's going on.
Hey, change your... They're on our tail, man.
I'm honestly speechless at the moment.
Let's let him go for a little bit.
Brendan, what is going on in New Chaz?
We're leaving New Chaz.
Some new developments are in place that are saying that Raz doesn't really want us in his apartment.
Well, hold on a second.
Can you call Raz for us?
Can you get him on the phone?
Um, I might be able to call him if you check back with me in a couple minutes.
Okay, let's call him from the... We'll check back.
That is the face of death.
That was me keeping up appearances.
I was very scared.
We were very worried.
We were like, oh no.
Yeah.
You might notice when you go back and watch that show, there are some very long shots of just me at the desk because my half-Asian Laurie Bill Richmond and Gerald are going like, what's going on?
We're trying to figure out what's going on.
Is everyone alive?
Are they okay?
Yeah.
Um, we made it.
Nothing from the FBI.
Keep in mind, too, when they talk about the Capitol riots and right now they're talking about what's going on.
It's okay, we don't need to bring it up.
People see.
Talking about another riot that may happen.
Insurrection, right?
Talking about a few people who trespassed.
Okay, what about, again, we're all saying the same thing and different reactions, what about the fact that Americans, hundreds of millions of Americans watch their cities burn, at least two billion dollars in property damages, because they haven't updated the number, I'm willing to bet it's probably four billion, at least a thousand officer casualties, dozens of people dead, this happened during the Summer of Love across the country, how many investigations?
How many charges?
Comparatively, I know there have been some, but did they infiltrate all of these groups?
Yeah.
They didn't really need to, because you don't need to go into the Black Lives Matter riots or Antifa and be like, let's shoot people.
Like, oh, two steps ahead of you.
We've already done that.
You weren't with us a block ago, were you, right?
No, but you're talking about people that have been arrested for them, and they tried to debunk this.
Yeah, it's because they burned down buildings.
They went and arrested people for committing those crimes.
What they didn't do is arrest tons of other people who were responsible for damage and organizing protests.
And murder.
Well, and people being pulled out of their cars, people, you know, trying to beat them up.
Like, you didn't go get everybody.
They did beat them up.
They did!
No, I know.
Pulled them out of cars and tried to beat them up.
Well, in some cases they tried.
Some people actually got away and actually got in their car and drove off.
In some cases some people use their Second Amendment right to defend themselves and they were the ones who got charged.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Absolutely.
You didn't exactly have to infiltrate that network.
No.
It was there.
You just had to go downtown.
Just go downtown and look for the pallet of bricks.
Follow the pallet brick road.
This is all you need to do.
And this is, look, I want to This is something I think that a lot of you know this to be true, but sometimes people don't necessarily know how to articulate it, and you don't want to come across like, you're denigrating all of our service members.
Okay, first thing, there's a huge delineation between unelected officials who have been given these huge, or certainly influential positions of power.
Power over huge swaths of your life, over private citizens' life, right?
These people at desks, these are pencil pushers.
There's a big difference between them and agents in the field, let's be really clear.
Now, the reason though, The FBI does this.
Think about this for a second, right?
They state the biggest Al-Qaeda plot that was foiled.
Well, that was a hoax.
When you look at Governor Whitmer, how long did that run on the news?
We did a rally to protest the nursing home deaths just to freedom from information requests.
Thousands of people had a professional head counter.
The only story was a couple hundred people show up in a protest.
Why?
Because it was entirely peaceful.
But they spent—it was like a morphine drip on a loop in the news.
So it's a lot easier for you, when you're the FBI, to stage events and say, look how successful we are.
It's a lot easier to go to your superiors, right, and say, look what we created and we stopped because you're bringing them—look, it's like a dog bringing them a bird.
look what we did as opposed to all of the other missed opportunities where someone would
have to go to their superior and take accountability for failure.
So the FBI wants to say, look, we stopped an assassination.
No, no, no, you, half of the group was you and you were the only ones talking about assassination.
Look, we stopped Al-Qaeda.
No, no, no, no, you were effectively acting like Al-Qaeda.
It's a lot easier to do that for the FBI than to go and say, look, okay.
BOOM!
Guy raped, sexually assaulted 158 women, gymnasts.
Did come to us.
We thought they were drama queens.
And didn't do anything for 17 months.
How many women were raped?
40.
Over 40 at least, to the best of our knowledge.
Oh, well.
Our bad.
But that's not 50.
Yeah!
Right?
40 is the new 50.
So terrible.
What?
Isn't that what we say here in the FBI?
Well, we do say that, John Smith.
By the way, you can't lie.
We say Hindsight's 2020.
Yes!
Also, Hindsight is the FBI's purview.
Oh my gosh.
So, and then you also have, is it easier for them to say, look, we stopped Al-Qaeda than
it is for someone in the FBI to go to a superior and say, okay, $2 billion in damages and over
a thousand officer casualties across the country, dozens of deaths.
That really got away from us.
This is just, it's not that difficult, and I think that people need to understand as conservatives, when you look at these problems, understand human nature.
People are selfish.
And when you have these giant bureaucratic wings of government, they're designed around a socialist utopia, that everyone is inherently good, right?
It doesn't take into account that people who are individuals Want to go to their boss and say, I did a good job.
And it's a lot easier to say that if you've staged something than it is to actually do your job and monitor what is happening across the country because that's random.
That's difficult.
I know this because we've intercepted these communications.
Accidentally!
And there were people at the FBI saying, how'd you do that?
How did you end up with a knife in your hand from Antifa?
How'd you end up finding the sawed-off shotguns in their trunk that they were planning for Ben Shapiro?
I'm like, I don't know!
Shouldn't you guys be telling me?
It's human nature for individuals to want to take credit for wins and to try and avoid taking responsibility for losses.
That's why the stories you hear about are generally I don't want to say fake, but they're pre-orchestrated and it's quintessential right distraction.
Yeah.
Well, and we need transparency for these organizations to be able to trust the work that they're doing.
And right now the FBI is fighting it.
In this case, you're talking about with Whitmore, Fox basically said his legal defense was, I've been coaxed into doing this.
And they said, look, we don't like your defense.
We don't think it's plausible.
And so therefore we're not going to give you all of the information.
He said, look, I understand that it's important to maintain secrecy for the people who infiltrated this group so that they can do their job later.
Fine.
I just want access to the communications.
What did they talk about behind their backs?
Like, what did they say that they wanted him to do?
And they're like, no, we're not going to give you When it's 12 to 14 FBI to actual group.
I thought this was like... How is that an infiltration?
How's this not dangerous?
It's just like the FBI taping guitar lesson posters to posts for militiamen.
Pull off a number.
Yeah, I'll go to that.
You want to shoot the governor?
I wanted to learn how to play some Clapton.
Come on.
So bad.
What else you wanna do?
You wanna do anything else?
Are you sure?
How about you want to do a little bit of raping and pillaging maybe?
That's not really my thing.
I just like drinking beer and hating the governor.
We got pipe bombs right over here.
Pipe bombs?
I ain't touched that since college.
For me, after one pipe bomb, I am done!
Let's grab that guitar.
I'll teach you B minor.
Let's not talk about that guy who was in A minor.
Yes!
So you guys, look, hopefully that helps set this straight for you, and this gives you at least, what I want to do is give you a compass going forward.
Because as you go forward, again, again, I really, really, I want to, smash that like button, that obviously matters, but I want as many, this is a sample size, we're pretty fortunate here on this show to be able to have a big sample size with you guys in the comments section.
Thank you.
Yeah.
How many of you know about, are planning on attending this, what they're saying, I don't know anyone.
And by the way, I knew everyone at a tea party.
I knew somebody.
I knew at least one person at any tea party event.
I knew people when you were talking about rallies for Donald Trump.
I didn't know anyone who went to the January 6th event.
I knew of one person who went, but there were so many people, he was just there supporting the president.
He didn't do anything.
No, of course, there were a lot of people who were upset about it.
I don't know anyone here, though.
I don't know anyone going, sample study, let's see.
Maybe I'm wrong.
I could be out of touch.
Well, they did call him all sorts of names for having the wall built around the White House as well.
Right.
When Trump was in office.
Yeah, they're saying he was a coward.
Yeah.
But it was hiding.
Yeah.
And they were also shooting and trying to kick down the gate.
Correct.
Yeah.
So I don't know.
It's like a government building.
That almost almost proves the reason for a gate.
Oh, I mean, yeah.
Wait a minute.
Oh, that's why it's there.
Walls work, you say?
Shut up.
Shut up, said the Vatican.
Look at my gold shoes!
I've got a gold sidewalk!
We don't want anybody to paint it.
No, no, no.
You don't understand.
We're against walls unless they're painted of solid gold.
It's just a quality thing.
Aesthetics.
We have lots of money.
Lots of it.
Okay, so before we go, this is something that I do want to talk about.
Steven Spielberg.
Now look, Spielberg, I am a huge West Side Story fan.
I know when people get... I'm a Spielberg fan.
Yeah, he hasn't really had a great film since Catch Me If You Can, but... Munich?
Was that after Catch Me If You Can?
Yes.
And since Munich?
Fair.
Fair.
I don't think Bridge of Spies was very good.
Tintin, take it or leave it.
Just kidding!
Leave it!
I like Tintin.
I like his hair.
It is comical.
Speaking of hair.
Wait, did he do Ready Player One?
Speaking of hair, what's going on on CNN?
Oh, yeah, no, let's criticize Mitch McConnell.
Can we bring on Cruella?
Be sure to bring your puppy coat.
That'll really stick it to Mitch.
Which, by the way, I watched last night Cruella.
Has anyone seen it?
I fell asleep.
Is it just me?
Most unnecessary prequel ever?
Like, we need to humanize the woman who tried to kill puppies to make a coat?
I can't sympathize.
I cannot sympathize fully.
Yeah, it was very hard to sympathize with Emma Stone in that movie.
Short of that movie just being Cruella decapitated in a ditch where someone traveled back in a DeLorean to save the puppies for the coat, I'm not interested.
And I fell asleep because it was so boring that I didn't see the redemption arc.
So it was just a spoiled bitch who wanted to kill puppies.
Well, you know the scene where the lady falls off the cliff?
Yeah.
It's not in there for no reason.
Right.
So it's like, whenever a movie starts like that, I'm like, well, there's the ending.
Yeah.
And that's what happened.
It was very well stylized, I will say.
It was.
She's a good actress, too.
She is a good actress.
But yeah, it was strange because my son and niece wanted to watch it.
It's PG-13.
I'm like, all right.
And I'm like, this is A bit much.
Yeah, this is a bit much, you know.
Also, I don't really know that your son is into a film about haute couture, which if he is, you have some other problems.
No, he was bored to tears.
Okay, good.
Yeah, my son comes in, I made creme brulee!
What you should just do next time, just to be sure, is have Cruella and a pair of tits right next to you.
Whoa, whoa!
And he's like, uh, dinner.
Stouffer's, for when Cruella's on.
Not a fan.
No, not a fan, and that's what worries me about West Side Story, because West Side Story, I will say, is one of, and I know people, best musical I think ever made.
Bernstein, the composition is very complicated.
Try singing tonight, when you look at the way they do this with half notes, it's very, very difficult, very well orchestrated.
Now, that being said, I hope they solve the problem that from the original West Side Story, a little bit of a believability problem.
Tony was obviously more interested in banging riff than he was Maria.
Yes.
I think we all know.
Oh, yeah.
A little bit.
If you didn't watch the original West Side Story, just in case the actual people out there who don't give credit where credit's due to the gay community, watch the little gay dancers do muscle-ups like it's nothing on pipes.
Like, I would be winded for a month Well, that reminds me of that Norm Macdonald SNL bit where it's, uh, the two gangs just start dancing at each other and he's like, what the hell is this?
Like, I thought we were gonna fight!
It's like, why?
He's like, I don't know, it's just, we felt it.
He's like, what do you mean you felt it?
You all were doing the exact same moves!
What I find so funny too about West Side Story is when they're describing the weapons, like at the gang fight, they go, yeah!
Knives!
Knives!
Change!
Zip guns!
Wait, a rubber band gun?
You just said knives and chains, and I know some with surgical tubing.
That stings!
It doesn't kill you!
Dennis the Menace walks away all sad.
Oh, I had a slingshot for you.
Wilson's like, should have been, when you're a jet, you're a jet all the way!
Shut up, Wilson.
You missed the boat.
So, uh, anyway, this is, uh, I haven't watched this in its entirety, but, uh, West Side Story they're remaking, and I'm just hoping that it is not an unnecessary remake, and they don't do the auto-tune thing like they've done with all the other, I know, Disney movies, Beauty and the Beast.
I didn't know you were such a musical buff.
Like, this is crazy.
I'm not a musical buff.
I love West Side Story.
Right, yeah, so, like, you're talking about half notes and all this other stuff.
You didn't like the remake of Gatsby?
Where it had a... Not so great?
Yeah, where he was in a speakeasy listening to Rihanna.
No, I didn't, uh... Yeah, yeah.
You didn't like that?
No.
It wasn't quite realistic when everybody was dancing in, like, 1920s Model Ts on a bridge.
Right, right, right.
Right to the soundtrack of Lorde and Joel Edgerton, just like, I HIT A BITCH WITH MY CAR!
It's the worst movie.
The whole movie, I'm just sitting there with my friend like, why?
Why this?
Why this?
I hope it's not that.
Well, I hope it's not that either.
That's a good point.
But you don't like West Side Story, the original, so much.
I don't hate it.
I like the idea of it.
I mean, if I'm going to go to a play, probably going to see Book of Mormon.
For the fifth, fourth time?
That one's pretty damn good.
The good thing about West Side Story, though, is I think it actually, and I hope they don't try and politicize this again to divide us, it was, hey, look, you have Puerto Ricans, which is kind of funny because it's like they're half American, and it's like you have Puerto Ricans and you have, really, what probably would be Italians, Irish, basically just not Puerto Rican, and it's really tough to tell by the actors because they really just took Irish-Americans and slapped a coat of paint on them in a lot of these.
So tanner.
But the point is it was love, even when it's a clearly gay man.
And a woman who was thrown off a boat later on by Christopher Walken or Wagner that love conquers all.
And that's a little generational.
Look up Natalie Wood, Christopher Walken, Wagner, and that's why Christopher Walken is weird.
Don't know what happened.
I thought we had a Zodiac.
Although Robert Wagner is the only straight man that can pull off a turtleneck.
That's true.
It's a fact.
What's going on there, Angela?
You look like you're waving something.
She was messing with her jacket.
Oh, okay.
I thought it was cold.
Women.
Always cold.
I've got tiny bones.
Well, that's the osteoporosis.
She's just Sally Field in a wig.
Yeah.
Okay, so let's watch this.
We'll watch the reaction to the West Side Story trailer.
I'm a fan, and let's see what this looks like.
All right.
All right. Let's go. Is this animated? All right.
I was gonna say it looks like they changed the face.
Like they matched Natalie Wood and then put Shepard Smith's face.
Yeah.
This is my first time in New York City.
I want to be happy here.
I want to make a life at home.
Are you ready?
Tonight is about family.
Oh, it's the gay guy from Pitch Perfect!
But I repeat myself.
It's a fair casting.
Yes, you do.
What a redundant.
You know what would be an announcement?
It's the straight guy from Pitch Perfect!
I like that actor.
He's a good actor, yeah.
Baby Driver?
It's the heterosexual song and dance man.
I like that actor too.
He was in that new show, Summer Game.
I haven't seen it.
Keep away from him as long as you're in my house.
I'm a grown up now, Bernardo.
I'm gonna think for myself.
Tony, we need you if we're going to work.
That's a little over the top there.
We need you if you're going to work!
If you eat anything in New York when you eat a plate of pasta, you have to be in a wife beater.
And plumbing at the same time.
We also have expensive jewelry.
Please just tell me James Corden doesn't show up as a fat cat.
Well, unless it's the ending.
Ha ha ha ha!
Life matters.
Even more than love.
See, I'm not a film snob.
This looks good.
It does look good.
Natalie Wood.
Doesn't float.
Listen, that wasn't in the instruction manual.
It wasn't.
You got hit with the sail.
When is that coming to theaters?
Do we know?
December.
It's coming in December.
Okay, so what are your thoughts?
Uh, I think, you know, as far as musicals go, I would go and check that one out.
I have to say, as far as musicals go, because, you know, I don't want to seem like, uh... Yeah, you know.
Hey, look!
What's going on?
Wait, whoa.
How do you fire this gun, white man?
I don't know.
By pulling this little trigger?
Oh my gosh.
I think so.
I think it's the trigger.
How many bullets are left in this gun?
I don't know.
It's your gun, Choy Sauce.
Is there enough?
Is there enough bullets to shoot you?
I don't know.
Why is he so upset?
Or you, Cracker?
Are you?
Are you Honky?
Are you Honkstress?
Honkstress is a thing.
Slurs.
Honkstress is real.
You, Pecker Woods, killed my brother!
Because all you have is hate in your hearts!
I didn't know Austin has a brother.
Yeah.
Oh, had a brother.
Oh, well that explains why he's upset.
Yeah.
We're gonna go talk about our crushes here on Mog Club because we can't talk about that.