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April 8, 2021 - Louder with Crowder
01:03:46
GUN CONTROL IS HERE! Biden’s Agenda Gets RADICAL | Louder with Crowder
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Time Text
You You
You You
You She's
You You
Hmm Oh Hmm.
Ugh.
Respectable, man.
That's pretty good.
I made some movies I'm not proud of.
Good to be here.
That was vulgar.
What?
What do you mean?
Have you seen the movies I'm in?
You wouldn't be proud of them, either.
Anyway, good to be here.
Welcome to Louder with Crowder.
I'm Dave Landau.
Of course, some of you have heard of me.
Most of you haven't.
And joining me today in the studio, we've got Gerald.
Yo.
Tuckanoan.
Tuckanoan.
I had to switch it up, Tocanowan.
How you doing?
Not-so-tiny-tiny Tim.
Quarter Black.
Yo, what's up?
And Craw Daddy.
Trainwreck Park 2.
Yep, that's what we're doing.
All aboard the choo-choo.
We're going into the wall.
Anyway, thank you guys for tuning in, and be sure to subscribe.
Also, what else do we do?
We comment.
We comment.
We go to the merch shop.
We go to Crowder Shop.
We'll talk about that in a second.
You ring that bell?
Get that shirt right there.
Today we're talking- It's George Washington without the teeth, jerks.
He had a mix mash of teeth.
Fine, whatever.
How many times do I have to explain that?
Yeah, he had some people's teeth that worked for him.
I shouldn't say worked.
But yeah, then he had, you know, wooden teeth in there too.
What a mess.
Total lie.
I bet everybody stunk.
Can you imagine how bad everyone smelled back then?
Social distancing was a thing for a reason.
Can you imagine his breath?
Oh yeah, just the breath of him on top of you.
I don't know, George, why did you go right to that?
I just pictured Barbara Washington or whatever it's called.
Martha Washington.
You know, one of the Washingtons.
Yeah, one of them.
One of the many.
What is this, the Biden family?
One of his kids that look like you.
Oh, man.
Lineage.
Good start.
Anyway, yes.
I think this is the third rail.
Is this literally what he just texted me about?
Okay.
Well, no.
We're not doing anything that's offensive.
Not on Dave Landau's Louder with Crowder.
Nope.
No, sir.
Today we are, though.
We are going to talk about the term Latinx and see if Hispanic people actually do prefer it.
And Hunter Biden also smoked Parmesan cheese, which is kind of weird.
We'll get to Clarence Thomas, the epic concurring opinion about digital media companies and the allegations against Deshaun Watson.
Have you heard about this guy?
Heck of a QB.
Spoken like a true fan.
Right?
Is that how you say it?
Is that football?
Yes, it's football.
Am I doing this right?
Is that right?
QB is correct, yes.
With a name like Deshawn, I knew it wasn't hockey.
That's true.
Wow.
There is one Deshawn in hockey.
Is there?
Yeah, he drowned.
Okay, moving on.
It was a hot day.
Terrible.
It was very warm.
They didn't understand you had to wait for it to freeze.
What position were you?
I was a tight end.
A tight end?
Yeah, don't you know.
Stop!
We'll keep that from behind the paywall.
Anyway, and finally, we have exclusive tapes from a phone call between President Trump and former Vice President Joe Biden.
How do you guys like that?
I love it!
And again, we're just gonna jump on it again.
The best way to support the show is go to crowdershop.com.
It's a live show Monday through Thursday 10 a.m.
Eastern.
Mug club slash live chat.
Comment, comment, comment!
Yes, not right now on YouTube because you can't because you are degenerates for the most part, but the people that are on the Blaze can chat and we'll answer those later on.
Yes, hit that bell.
And we love you either way, I'm just saying.
Yeah, we appreciate that you're here.
Many fans.
Not that much.
Yeah, many fans from my old show that are garbage.
Just trash.
And we love you.
And I love many of them.
Anyway, many of them I don't.
It's the opposite of love.
They won't go away.
It's like a cyst.
Breaking right now, Biden to take executive action on guns.
Biden is going to issue executive actions on guns today.
I read that twice.
Hahahahaha!
I guess I shouldn't read the part that says don't read.
So anyway, Biden is expected to issue six orders supposedly aimed at reducing gun violence by requiring background checks for ghost guns and red flag laws.
What is a ghost gun?
I don't even know.
I believe Peter Venkman had one.
Nice.
Thank you.
I'm glad you liked it.
We'll have to look it up, like what technically is a ghost gun?
It's a gun that doesn't have a serial number.
Oh, is that what it is?
Because it's legal to sell those now.
Yeah, they could sell you an 80% lower and then you drill holes in it and... Oh, is that what it is?
Yeah, and it doesn't have a serial number.
I didn't know that.
Hey, we learn something every day.
Gotcha.
So that is what I buy out of lunch bags.
Correct.
I love it.
Tim has a few.
Does he?
Mm-hmm.
I bought two off of them, don't tell anybody.
The guy's trunk is filled with guns.
That's just weird.
Yeah.
Ghost guns.
Ghost guns, yeah.
They're not real.
So you go to reach him and you're like, where?
Where the hell?
You go like, oh.
Where's my hologram gun?
And then you just cover it in ectoplasm and you're like, that's not ectoplasm.
All right.
Anyway.
So, which makes you wonder... Deshawn?
Deshawn?
Is he getting a trunk tug?
It's a little early.
Which makes you wonder who's running the show here, since during the Democratic debates, Joe insisted on following the Constitution when it came to gun laws.
I mean, I would just say, hey, Joe, it's sad to say, you know, we can't let's say yes, we can.
Let's be constitutional. We got to. Yes, we can. No, Kamala.
Oh, this is terrible.
She is annoying.
She's haunting us.
She sounds like she's crying whenever she speaks.
It's a plaintiff whale.
I thought a whale different.
But she's not heavy.
She's very in shape.
And she flaps her arms while making a point.
Like a chicken.
That's right.
She's like, ah, caca!
And then there's eggs that she lays, and then it's like, kill it!
So... Not literally, of course.
No, no, not literally.
No.
Just before it hatches.
Scrambling.
So it's... That's it, anyway.
Move on.
Roe vs. Wade vs. Kamala.
It's also a bit ironic since we recently found out Joe Biden's son Hunter lied about his past drug use to try and buy a gun in 2018.
Which is a felony!
Well normally it's a felony.
Not in this particular case I guess because it's Joe Biden's son.
I'm also finding this out now myself as a gun owner.
And it ended up in a dumpster next to a school, right?
Yeah.
Yes.
That's just weird.
Well, I think if you're gonna throw a gun away, it's important to do it near a school.
Yeah.
I've always said that.
I thought it was like you throw it in a river or a lake, probably.
What I do is I just paint the tip of a real gun orange and just hand it to any kid.
Oh, totally not real.
Here you go.
It's not loaded.
And it's like, it is loaded.
They do things differently in Detroit, don't they?
They do.
Well, if you pull an orange tip gun on a cop, you're not gonna make it home for supper.
That's actually on our flag.
It's a little wordy.
Yeah, it's not a great slogan.
That's why they came up with Pure Michigan, because Tim Allen was tired of going, paint the tip orange.
Come to Pure Michigan and pull a gun on a cop.
So, question of the day.
Will I get the show cancelled?
Yes!
Likely.
Is the jury still up?
Is it still up?
Highly likely.
Okay, I actually, the real question of the day is, what do you remember from the Hunter Biden story?
Was it memory hold for you?
Comment down below, that's what I'm telling the viewers.
Comment down below, what do you remember from the Biden story?
Put it down there.
I don't care.
Write your comment.
I'm not you.
I'm me.
I'm better than you.
Look at me.
And now look at you.
You lose.
Look at Gerald.
He's better than you.
There you go.
He's a tall man.
He is.
You can't tell in the chair.
No, he's sitting.
I've heard that more than anything else.
I'm surprised by how tall you guys are.
Oh, I always get the complete opposite.
I don't ever get that.
No, I always get like, wow, you're short.
Do women talk to you?
Just your wife.
Yes.
She's taller.
No, in a good way.
Everyone's taller.
No, it's fine.
You owed me for that comment I made yesterday.
Yours landed better.
It's fine.
Well, it hurt equally as much.
You've probably heard the new term, Latinx, going around.
It's supposed to be a politically correct way to refer to Hispanic people.
You guys have heard of this?
It's like genderless.
I think, yeah.
It's to avoid a gender... yeah, whatever.
It's not true.
I just don't care.
It's, uh, it's Hispanic people and to avoid a gender language, which, I mean, never mind that every word in Spanish is gendered.
Anyway, we decided to go out and ask some Latinx people what they thought of the term.
Latinx community.
Latinx.
Latino.
A Latinx person.
Here's some Spanish 101 that can be hard for people learning the language.
Every noun has a gender.
Language is ever-changing, and that's certainly the case when it comes to defining people of Spanish-speaking origin here in the U.S.
Spanish is a gendered language, and the O favors masculinity.
So now, we have Latinx.
The Spanish language is really gendered, so Latinx is the gender-neutral alternative.
I identify as Latinx.
I mean, obviously.
Everything that we were taught came within the last hundred years and it all came from straight white men.
This notion that any masculine presence in a space changes the grammar of the language.
Assigning importance to gender in a way that communicates to girls and women that their experience is necessarily changed by the presence of masculinity.
And when I think about that linguistically, and I think about the implications on a culture whose language has that kind of hidden inequality with regards to binary genders.
Despite what the media, Twitter, and my Netflix queue has told me, look, I am not convinced that Latinx is a thing, that it's ever been a thing, outside of rich, white women's circles.
And so I decided to check it out for myself with people who actually speak the Romance languages.
Nowadays they're talking about, like, language that's offensive.
Do you refer to yourself as Latino, Latina, or Latinx?
Because now they're saying Latinx is the term.
Have you heard that?
Latina.
Latino, okay.
Yeah, because now they're saying Latin X is the new term they're using in college.
Did you know that?
Oh, I don't know.
Hi, I'm so sorry.
This might be a weird question.
I was asking, you look Latino.
I'm sorry?
Are you Latin American, Latino, Hispanic?
Latino.
Are you a Latina?
Yes, I do.
The reason I ask is because I don't want to be offensive.
You know, I want to be sensitive.
And what do you prefer as the proper terminology?
Do you prefer Latina, Latino, Latinx?
Hmm, I don't know.
Do you call yourself Latinx?
Okay, give me a moment.
No, no, it's okay.
I don't know.
Just Latina?
Yeah.
Okay, so Latina is not offensive.
Is that okay? That's respectful if I say Latina American?
Yes.
Okay, okay, that's all.
All right, thank you very much.
I appreciate it.
And since I'm a busy man, I asked some of my employees to go do the same.
I prefer the term Latin or Latina.
I prefer to like Latinx.
Have you heard of that?
No.
No?
Yeah, it's like... I don't like that.
You don't, yeah.
I don't like that, no.
Okay, that's a... Is that the way you're teaching at school or no?
Well, now that's like the PC term.
Yeah, I know.
You're supposed to say Latinx.
I don't like that.
You don't like that?
It's regular.
Are you Latino by any chance?
Yeah.
Okay, so question for you.
Have you heard the term Latinx?
I don't know.
Latinx?
No, I haven't heard of that.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I think it's like Latina.
Yeah, it's Latina.
Latinx?
I don't know.
No?
No.
I told her, yeah.
I guess we're trying to figure out if it's like useful to start using that.
If you like Latina.
Latina's good?
Yeah.
Latina.
Same thing?
You never heard of Latinx?
Mexicana.
Latina.
Mexicana.
I like that one.
Latina.
I'm just trying not to be, you know, you don't need...
But no X.
Yeah, no X.
Yeah.
Yeah, they added that.
Alright, thanks!
You know what I'm talking about?
There's Latin X. It's like the new phrasing.
No?
I'm just curious if people actually call each other Latinx.
I don't really use that word because it's pretty weird, okay?
Okay.
Do you like being called Latina, Latino, or Latinx?
Latinx?
Do you like being called Latinx?
Like Latinx?
Have you ever heard of it?
Okay, so you don't go by Latinx?
Okay.
There's this term going around like social media, Latinx.
Have you ever heard that?
Latinx, it's like Latino, but like they cut out the gendered language.
I don't know.
Do you know anybody that knows what that is?
Prefer to be referred to like Latinx or Latina.
Latina.
Latina?
Have you ever heard of Latinx before?
Have you heard of that?
Have you ever heard of the term Latinx?
Which one?
Latinx.
Have you ever heard of that?
Say it again?
Yeah, what is Latinx?
Have you ever heard of that?
It's like... It's like the new way you're supposed to say Latina or Latin.
or Latin.
You never heard of it?
It's like trending on Twitter.
It's like, trending on Twitter.
Which do you prefer?
Do you like... It's better.
It's just regular Hispanic.
Regular... That's what we're just trying to figure out.
Like, it's... You don't want to be offensive, you know, these days.
I prefer if it's like, Latinx or Latina.
I prefer if it's like, Latino.
Latino, like, just to cover all?
Yeah, but the other one is in a different word.
In like, Spanish, you know?
Right, because it's gendered, right?
It doesn't really work in Spanish.
I really don't like the term.
You know the one with the G?
Yeah.
It's like an X at the end that cut off the last part.
Yeah, it doesn't work in Spanish in the way that the language does.
Yeah.
It's good.
There's like, people who are Latin, who speak Spanish and stuff, are transgender, but it's really good.
Okay.
Okay, so do you prefer, like, Latino, or would you prefer, like, if people use Latinx more?
That's fine.
Okay, thank you.
So there you go, out of everyone we asked, only one person preferred the term Latinx, was younger, woke, more Americanized.
The Pew Research Center has just published its first study on the use of the gender-neutral term Latinx.
It found that most Latinx adults in the United States haven't heard of the word, and only about 3% use it to identify themselves as an individual.
What do you think?
Have you encountered people requesting the term Latinx in your everyday life?
Or do you think that this deserves to remain in the rich white feminist graveyard?
The rich white feminist graveyard is actually in Los Angeles.
That's good to know.
Is it on the tourist map?
It is.
If you look to your left, there's the Rich White Feminist Graveyard.
It's pretty cool.
You put flowers on just the men's graves.
The male feminists.
Oh, okay.
That's a thing.
Did you know that?
Support, yeah.
Guys, go ahead and ring that bell.
That's the best way for us to get subscribers along with commenting.
Hit up that bell.
Hear that?
That's a bell.
Click it.
Smack it.
Hear it.
Smack it.
These aren't your old fans, Dave.
These are our fans.
A different crowd.
Yeah, slap it, tug it.
What's the bop game?
Yeah, it's bop it.
Flick it.
Rub it.
No.
No.
Hey, NFL player.
We'll get to it.
You'll understand later.
You'll understand later, guys.
I don't know if you've heard about that.
QB.
I want my quarterback quarterback.
All right.
The song none of the women sang.
No.
No.
Baby back ribs.
Remember that Chili's?
Of course.
Who can forget that?
Classic.
Yeah, then you have the McRib.
I've never eaten a McRib.
I'm not gonna lie.
It's disgusting.
I'm pissed off about that one.
They're seasonal.
The Irish should be offended by the McRib.
Come on.
Why would it be seasonal?
Like the animal that comes from...
It's in season.
You understand the green shake around St.
Patrick's Day, but not the McRib.
I will eat a drink, a shamrock shake, all day.
That is a delicious treat.
Is it?
Now, I don't know if it's pork or cow the McRib comes from, or the shape of a rib.
It's a mystery meat.
But yeah, it's a very sick animal.
I guess they have to wait for it to want to kill itself, and then they're like, oh, it's in season.
It's got a whooping cough.
It started cutting itself.
Get the marketing going.
It keeps running headfirst into a wall like Aaron Hernandez.
That football?
Yeah, that's another football player.
A tight end!
Is he a tight end?
Well, he was.
I heard he had a couple lovers.
So anyway, CBS makes, am I on the right part?
Great.
You are.
Yeah.
I don't know if you guys do know that CBS has made Hunter Biden the victim.
Oh, that's sad.
Hunter Biden is coming out with a memoir entitled Beautiful Things, named after his niece's feet.
Am I wrong?
It's very true.
We can put up sources.
They'll take the video down.
We won't put up the video.
It's actually a crime.
And earlier this week, he did two CBS interviews to promote the book.
Did you say you and your dad talk every night?
Every night.
Yeah.
If it's possible to pull the politics out of it, I'm left with tremendous sympathy for a family that has been ripped and wounded by this.
I mean, no matter how good a parent you are or how bad a parent you are, this can happen to your family and we're seeing it play out in a very public detail.
Yeah, it's absolutely true.
If it helps them get better, I'm sure Joe Biden's all for it.
Yeah, absolutely.
As a father.
He's got family support for sure.
He came to my apartment one time, and this is when he was still in office as vice president.
And so he kind of ditched his Secret Service, figured out a way to get over to the house.
Irresponsible.
And I said, what are you doing here?
He said, honey, what are you doing?
I said, dad, I'm fine.
He said, you're not fine.
So he calls his adult son Honey.
I refer to Steven as Sweetie.
My dad called me Sugar Tits.
He'd flick my nips.
Sugar?
He'd be like, you're on punishment, Sugar Tits.
And that was the punishment?
The flicking?
That was it.
I'm glad it didn't go any further than that.
I mean, it went on though for days.
When you least expected it.
It's like being waterboarded, except with nipples.
Did your parents punish you?
Of course!
I have sympathy for Joe Biden and his family.
You can be a great father and sometimes really tragic things can happen.
A lot of you guys know my sister was into drugs and I've talked about this.
She has a great redemptive story.
We grew up in the same house, right?
So things like that can happen.
I think what we're poking a little bit of fun at here is that it seems like there's a lot of weird stuff going on in the Biden household as well.
So it's not just that part.
I think drugs are pretty normal.
But if your dad came over to talk to her and was like, hey, young man, like that's essentially what honey is.
Yeah.
It's weird.
You don't call a guy that.
Maybe your mom would call you that, but not your dad.
I'd be like, hey, son, like there's like this father-son moment.
Son, you're not okay.
And maybe if honey, I don't know.
Yeah, that's just weird.
It's just weird.
Here, you combine it with smelling kids.
You combine it with putting women on his lap.
You combine it with forgetting.
I'm just like, I don't know, man.
That's a little strange.
Yeah, he didn't know who he was talking to.
He thought it was his wife.
I thought my dad ditched his Secret Service detail and showed up at my house calling me honey.
Also, Donald Trump Jr.
gives a really impassioned speech at the RNC, and everyone's like, oh, he must be on cocaine.
Meanwhile, we know what Hunter Biden was doing, and what's the media talking about?
Oh yeah, did you see the squirrely, shaky, scared-looking Hunter head?
That's what cocaine looks like, and it's because I used to do it and I had access to mirrors.
In fact, I was looking at a mirror when I would snort it.
Those are handy.
They come in handy, Dave.
Yeah, they do.
Well, that's why you have the mirror.
It's like you want to look good after you've powdered your nose.
It's true.
Got it.
Anyway.
In the Quran.
All right, so, and of course, CBS grilled him hard with the questions.
And then there's this.
In 2014, the younger Biden took a job on the board of a Ukrainian energy company, Burisma Holdings, at a time when his father, who was then vice president, had an active role in US policy toward Ukraine.
It raised eyebrows at the time.
But by the 2020 elections, Hunter Biden was the center of a political firestorm.
Hunter got thrown out of the military.
He was thrown out, dishonorably discharged.
That's not true.
He wasn't dishonorably discharged.
Cocaine use.
And he didn't have a job until you became vice president.
None of that is true.
Once you became vice president, he made a fortune in Ukraine, in China, in Moscow.
That is simply not true.
And various other places.
Looking back, did you make a mistake taking a spot on that board?
No, I don't think I made a mistake in taking a spot on the board.
In October 2020, a New York Post article said that emails purportedly showing shady dealings in Ukraine by Hunter Biden were found on a laptop computer that he supposedly left in a Delaware repair shop in 2019.
The details were sketchy at best.
And last month, a declassified intelligence report said that before the election, the Russians had launched a smear campaign against Joe Biden and his family.
It does not specifically talk about your laptop.
Yeah.
Was that your laptop?
I don't know.
I really don't know what the answer is.
You don't know, yes or no, if the laptop was yours?
I have no idea.
So it could have been yours?
Of course, certainly.
There could be a laptop out there that was stolen from me.
It could be that it was hacked.
It could be that it was Russian intelligence.
It could be that it was stolen from me.
And you didn't drop off a laptop to be repaired in Delaware?
Not that I remember at all.
Well, you were on crack.
So, we'll see.
I could have been wanting more crack and sold it.
Yeah, who knows?
Not that I remember.
I'm sorry, that last line, we'll see?
We'll see!
Yeah, we'll see.
Are you finding out with the general public?
Like, gosh, I really want to see the end of this story.
I have no idea how it goes.
I'll be tuning in.
It's not like they already exposed it and everybody pretended it didn't happen.
Yeah, we'll see how it works six months ago.
The specific details from the New York Post are sketchy, but Hunter Biden, not so much.
Sketchy at best.
His comments were just taken at face value.
Yeah, that's what they call it.
Sketchy at best.
They don't rebuke anything that they've said because they know it's true.
And, you know, here's a rundown of the events surrounding Hunter's Laptop and the Ukraine Energy Board position.
Twitter censored the New York Post story on Hunter's Laptop.
We all know that.
Yeah.
Claiming it was hacked information.
Yeah.
When it wasn't.
Oh, I thought there was a clip.
There is.
Oh, where was it?
Play that funky music.
Well, somebody's not on the ball and it's not me.
We made a total mistake with New York Post.
We corrected that within 24 hours.
I hate his face.
It was not to do with the content.
It was to do with a hacked materials policy.
Ah.
Oh, the hacked materials kiddie porn policy.
I'm so glad they're enforcing that, yeah.
What a terrible, ugh.
Do you guys remember when this happened, right?
So they banned them, they said, we fixed it within 24 hours, but what they did is they actually came back and said, no, you can't have your account unlocked again until you fix the tweet by deleting it.
Right.
And so this is the New York Post, what was the top five circulated newspaper in the country.
Easy.
This was on the heels of, I think, New York Times leaking Trump's tax returns, apparently, and Twitter having no problem with putting that story out there.
And then he said, yeah, we were wrong for taking you down, but you still have to delete the tweet because when we took you down, we weren't wrong yet.
We hadn't realized that moment in time.
So this is just some weird wormhole we all kind of fell into for this, right?
It took actually two weeks for Twitter to get them back up and running.
It's crazy.
And also, the guy who owns Twitter looks like he only grants evil wishes.
It's true!
Oh no, it's like a monkey's paw thing.
Yeah, it really is.
He's just not, he's a wish master.
Just a creepy looking guy.
He looks like an Amish guy on Rum Springer, but he just stayed there.
I'm going to do ecstasy.
I'm going to start a media company.
Former VP Joe Biden got a Ukraine prosecutor fired to protect Hunter.
Did you guys know that?
That's another fact.
I was supposed to announce that there was another billion dollar loan guarantee.
And I had gotten a commitment from Poroshenko and from, uh, Yatsenyuk that they would take action against the state prosecutor.
So they said they had a press conference and I said, I'm not going to, we're not going to give you the billion dollars.
They said, you have no authority.
You're not the president.
The president said, I said, call him.
I said, I'm telling you, you're not getting a billion dollars.
I said, you're not getting a billion.
I'm going to be leaving here.
I think it was what, six hours?
I look, I said, I'm leaving in six hours.
If the prosecutor's not fired, you're not getting the money.
Oh, son of a bitch.
Got fired.
And they put in place someone who was solid.
Oh, blackmail!
Solid.
Let's see if they take the term blackmail out of context.
I love how these elitists talk about the billion dollars as though it's theirs.
It's ours!
It's our money!
He talks like he's got a checkbook.
Yeah, it's not taxpayer money.
I like how he builds himself up as though he isn't just the vice president at that time.
One of the most least consequential positions in the U.S.
government, other than you could be president soon if something bad happens.
Just in case, guy.
And who knew something did?
It is amazing, though, that he just says that, and essentially the story is, like you said, talk to the real guy.
Yeah, yeah.
I can't do anything about it.
Well, and lest we forget, Donald Trump was accused of committing a crime by doing what he did on camera.
Right.
Literally.
And Trump didn't do it.
It's an amazing thing.
Right.
It's amazing.
I don't know.
Hunter also had texts about FaceTiming naked with someone who is allegedly to have been 14 and close to him.
We won't say who exactly.
I already did.
But you can do your own research.
Not hard to find.
No, there's information out there.
It was in the New York Post, as we've mentioned before, and everybody went, I still think it's fine.
It's okay.
They tried to slander Tony Bubulinski.
Do you remember that guy?
Yeah, Bubulinski.
It's a good name.
Bubulinski, Italian bread show.
They tried to slander...
They tried to slander Tony Bublinski's eyewitness accounts of Hunter's Ukraine dealings as Russian disinformation.
Joe Biden at a public debate referencing Russian disinformation, when he knows he sat face-to-face with me, that I traveled around the world with his son and his brother, to say that and associate that with my name is absolutely disgusting to me.
I've heard Joe Biden say that he's never discussed business with Hunter.
That is false.
I was introduced to Joe Biden by Jim Biden and Hunter Biden.
At my approximately hour-long meeting with Joe that night, we discussed the Biden's history, the Biden's family business plans with the Chinese, with which he was plainly familiar, at least at a high level.
On May 13th, 2017, I received an email concerning allocation of equity, which says 10% held by H for the big guy.
In that email, there's no question that H stands for Hunter, big guy for his father, Joe Biden.
Is he dead?
Yet?
Not yet.
Oh, not yet?
I think Biden keeps forgetting to have him killed.
He means to.
It just slips his mind.
Not quite as quick as the Clintons, you know?
No, he's always like, who was I supposed to suicide today?
I don't remember.
The Clintons have better staffing.
You have till three o'clock to have them hanging.
All right.
Leaving here in three hours.
Well they also, question two.
Yeah yeah.
You know we gotta put that out there.
They did ask him why he bangs.
Now I want to put this more diplomatically.
Dead brother's wife.
Bo's death shook the entire Biden family.
But the way Hunter dealt with his grief made headlines when he began dating his brother's widow.
After Bo died, you started a romantic relationship with Hallie, his widow.
It's biblical.
Come on, man.
When the news of that broke, how did people look at you?
Poorly.
I think people were...
Disgusted?
Disgusted. Yeah, I understand that. Horrified. I mean I really do. To me it's not something that is difficult to
explain because it came out of a real overwhelming grief that we both shared.
And I'll see you in the next one.
Overwhelming urge to do well.
We were together and trying to do the right thing.
And that grief turned into a hope for a love that maybe could replace What we lost.
Yeah, she had sex to replace your dead brother.
Got it.
Totally makes sense.
She is for you, bro.
People were confused about that.
RIP.
I'm taking care of her.
Don't worry, she's in good hands.
Did they just start their relationship after he died?
Because one of the overlays said it looked like the article was an affair.
At the wake, yes.
Immediately at the wake.
There's no way, in my opinion, I gotta be clear, there's no way there wasn't something before.
It's not like you're at the wake and you're like, so he's not around anymore.
You got some free time.
I don't have trouble explaining this at all.
It's my understanding that you're single now?
Come on, man!
What are you doing?
This is like Woody Crashers.
Just crash the funeral.
They're like, could you just please go?
Every time somebody dies, he just walks in like, hey.
Hey guys.
Hey.
Is that my relative's wife?
Here's what they didn't tell you.
He cheated on her with a stripper and had a kid with her.
Confirmed with a paternity test.
That's messed up, bro.
Did you know that?
He was finding hope for a love.
That's true.
It would last forever.
He was upset that his new love's brother died.
Well, husband.
Husband.
His brother.
I missed the joke on that.
Everything can't be perfect.
You know, Joe Biden talks about these poor grandparents that haven't been able to hug their kids during COVID.
Yeah.
He has two grandkids he hasn't acknowledged.
Oh, really?
Oh, yeah.
This is Grandpa Joe.
With the stripper.
Right, yeah.
Yeah, I mean, granted, I wouldn't acknowledge him either.
If he came to my door, I'd be like... DNA says they're 99.9% Joe's grandkids.
I'm just saying, if you showed up on my door and you're like, I have proof you're my daddy, I'd be like, hang on, I gotta go get a shotgun.
You fired into the air to scare them to run away.
Yes, like Joe Biden said.
No, he really should be responsible and those are your kids, Hunter.
Your kids.
I realize you gotta put up with Sparkle, but that's gotta be the worst part is having to have a stripper in your home.
Like, could you stop stealing?
So anyway.
These are your things.
This is yours.
Do you want me to break another vase?
No, please.
Please stop trying to smoke out of it.
Anyway, so conclusion, in my opinion.
Obviously, addiction is terrible and a crippling disease.
As you know, I am an addict.
But the media is trying to ignore the serious crimes alleged by handing Hunter a free victim card.
So why don't you comment, comment, comment.
Maybe you disagree with me.
Yeah.
I doubt you do, because I'd love to hear you stand up for him.
But please, comment, comment, comment.
Disagreement on YouTube?
I don't think that exists.
Everybody always says nice things.
That's what I like about... That's why they tell people, always read the comments.
That's what I hear.
Yeah, that's why.
I read them to just grow up.
Great for self-esteem.
Yeah, I'm always like, I didn't know that there were even that many gay slurs for me.
Who knew?
Yeah, I wish I was kidding.
All the letters.
Yeah, there's L, G, double A, R, P, plus, minus, double A, triple A. I have triple A. Do you?
Well, if the car breaks down.
You need it.
Yeah, you call them up.
They change my tires.
I was on the freeway once.
And give you the slurs as well.
They do.
Couldn't change it.
Well, they're right, then, when I can't even change my own tire.
You're just looking at it, scratching your head, like, I don't know.
It's there.
I'm like, look, it's the middle of winter.
You do it.
I tip.
I'm like, here's a 20.
And they're like, wow-wee.
I'm like, go get meth.
So before we move on, we actually forgot the best part.
He accidentally smoked Parmesan cheese.
Wow.
You would wake up some mornings, I shouldn't even say some mornings because you slept for like 15 minutes at a time.
Yeah.
And be looking for crack and just smoke whatever was there.
Yeah, I spent more time on my hands and knees picking through rugs, smoking anything that even remotely resembled crack cocaine.
I probably smoked more Parmesan cheese than anyone.
Anyone that you know, I'm sure.
That's not funny.
So awkward.
The joke did not land with her.
Parmesan cheese.
He's like, this is relatable, right?
You just smoke stuff you find in your rug.
Yeah.
Parmesan cheese, right?
Am I right?
Come on, you've been there.
Come on.
What, no?
Alright.
Next question.
You know, I am in recovery and an addict, so I do really feel for Hunter here, and I was actually surprised to learn there are a lot of addicts... Wait, do you guys...
Do you guys smell that?
I do.
It smells like a smoked Gouda.
It's here.
What's going on?
Hey guys!
I asked them not to do that.
It's no laughing matter.
Yeah, it's not funny.
That smoking cheese thing is just, it's a big problem.
A lot of people are OD'ing.
Yeah.
O-cheesing.
They find him over-cheesed.
It's like in, uh, what was that?
Uh, never mind.
The self-censoring of David.
The third rail just went by.
Speaking, yeah.
So, uh, it was, uh, I'm Gonna Get You, Sucka.
Do you remember that?
Where they're like, he overgold?
He'd be, like, wearing 300 chains and that's how he died.
One of my favorite bits.
How do you take a shit with all that on?
You don't.
So on Monday, the Supreme Court ruled The case against Trump.
I don't know if you guys have heard about this.
Clarence Thomas?
You know more than me.
Yeah.
Well no, they ruled.
So it was basically over him blocking a couple of people on Twitter and saying that that's a violation of the First Amendment.
But it was basically saying it was moot and should be dismissed.
But in his concurring opinion, Clarence Thomas suggested a few ways in which digital media may be held responsible for removal of certain content.
So I'll read just kind of a quick quote here.
If the aim is to ensure that speech is not smothered... Oh, Dave, you went too fast on the quote.
It's not smothered.
I didn't know I was in control.
You're in control of everything.
Oh, heavens.
The more glaring concern must, perforce, which we need to look that word up, be the dominant digital platforms themselves.
As Twitter made clear, The right to cut off speech lies most powerfully in the hands of private digital platforms.
The extent to which that power matters for purposes of the First Amendment and the context to which that power could lawfully be modified raise interesting and important questions.
Well, that was wordy, Clarence.
Yeah, I don't know what moot or concurring means.
So here to explain is half-Asian lawyer Bill Richmond.
Well Dave, moot and concurring opinion are important.
When talking about this case, it's actually changed names.
Some of y'all may not remember what the actual case was about because it originally started as Knight versus Trump.
Back in the early parts of the Trump presidency, when President Trump was controlling his Twitter account, he decided to block a few people and they complained.
Well now, since that's all been under the water, under the bridge at this point, the
case was continuing to go on despite President Biden taking office and now having control
or a sensible control of that account.
Ultimately, the Supreme Court ruled that the case was moot.
It really, there's no controversy anymore because the person at issue, Donald Trump,
is no longer in office.
But Clarence Thomas took this opportunity to issue a concurring opinion.
It's one that is his own.
It's one that he is allowed to publish to say, hey, I have some usings and some thoughts
regarding this particular topic.
And what's really interesting about it is that it crystallizes a number of different
theories about how big tech can be held responsible for the size and growth and control of the
market and what they really do when they're making their enforcement decisions.
To break it down, there's a couple of very basic legal theories, all of which I'm sure you're familiar with even if you don't know the name.
One of those is the idea of the common carrier.
You have buses, trains, Lodging, like hotels.
Each of those over a certain amount of time went through the same thing.
They're a private business, should they be regulated.
And for the common good, the government decided, and amongst the support of the people, that you should have free access and much less ability to restrict users that are people who get on buses, people that get on toll bridges, for example, or even hotels.
Those became common carriers.
They're subject to more regulation on what they can actually do to exclude because of the essential nature of that particular mode of either lodging
or transportation. In a very similar analogy, Justice Thomas talks about how social
media, given their large scale, has become a common carrier. They're drawn
analogies between those examples and how the need to communicate, to advertise,
even the sheer fact of the number of officials that are communicating on platforms and
publishing media units like Twitter and YouTube and Facebook have just increased
exponentially over the years, have made these companies more akin to common
carriers and the method of communications that they provide.
Now the second consideration is one of public accommodation.
There's long been a theory of law that when you have a certain thing, such as entertainment that is generally available to the public, it should be exactly that, generally available to the public, with more restrictions on what they can do to actually exclude people who are participating.
Well, there's a couple of different, more legal arguments about which circuit is saying that you can do it with physical spaces or not.
In the end, we know that these big tech companies have, of their own admission, wanted to grow to become ubiquitous within our society.
That's how they make money.
But their own growth has come with consequences.
They've gotten to the level of being public accommodations.
They've gotten to the level of being So big and so pervasive within our society is a mode of communication both privately and in official capacities that they now must essentially pay the consequences for that growth.
In the end though, Justice Thomas admits that there really is not that kind of case before the court at that very moment.
The case about Biden's control now of the Trump Twitter account when Trump was president really isn't the dispute there.
But what every one of us is thinking intuitively is what Justice Thomas put down very eloquently, that these companies have become so big that their ability to control the flow of information, their ability to close the doors of the marketplace of ideas, or even worse, secretly decide to keep certain ideas out of the marketplace and off the shelves for consumers to consider as they go about their public lives, That's why we have a lawyer.
big concern and without a doubt there will be more cases that come up that
deal with this issue on all sides of the spectrum. That's why we have a lawyer.
See you next time, Dave.
He's a good man.
He really is.
He has a good theme song, too.
I'm a little bit jealous of that.
But he made a few good points, and we've heard people talk to us before about this and say, look, it's a free market economy.
You guys should not have restrictions on what companies can do.
And for the most part, that's accurate until you reach a level where you become the new digital public square.
So right now, if we wanted to go out and make a point about something that's controversial, And, you know, something that would never ever happen, right guys?
YouTube would ban us, Twitter would ban us, and also Facebook would ban us, all in the same period of time.
Couldn't even imagine that.
On something that was kind of topical that we were trying to talk about, that would keep us from having a voice, right?
So we could go and speak somewhere, right, publicly, and speak in a public space, but you've basically taken away our ability to do it in the way that the founders intended.
So what they were talking about is, look, People go over here, you can go to the public square, you can say whatever you want, and you can reach as many people as you want by doing that.
Well, not anymore.
They have become the new digital public square, and I think it's really important that these cases make their way there, but I think it's coming through the states.
I think once the states enact those laws, like you've seen in Florida, I think we're going to see it in Texas as well soon.
You're going to start to see some people challenge it and then it will start making its way through the courts and it needs to happen because speech needs to be free.
If the Ayatollah Khomeini can say death to all Jews and still have a Twitter account, then I think that Donald Trump saying something a little mean or a little bit rude probably isn't grounds... Or fight like hell.
Right, isn't grounds for kicking him off of Twitter completely.
So I think it's an interesting point and I'm glad Senator Thomas weighed in on that.
Did you guys hear that?
What is going on?
Seriously, guys?
It's my second show!
What?
Wow!
Woo!
It's not okay.
Those Colombians are never okay.
I know they've been smuggling the cheese in here, and I've asked them not to.
Every time.
Throwing him over the fence.
He's Colombian.
Yeah.
Is he Colombian?
He is.
Drop him gently on the other side.
Basically.
On his head.
Well, I wish he would stop.
We've talked to him and he just doesn't care.
I don't know if you've heard this story.
Is it Deshaun Watson?
Deshaun Watson.
A QB.
QB?
Yes, you still have it.
Back quarter, back quarter.
I just want to call a quarterback that.
QB.
Quarterback.
I don't know football.
He doesn't know football.
I said you're better.
Oh, I'm better.
I agree with that.
Well, if you guys don't know, he's been I guess I... I'm trying to put this in words that won't get me in trouble.
He enjoyed going to massage parlors, from what I understand, which, who cares?
But the problem is that the women at the massage parlors claim that he... I guess he went to like normal massage parlors and was like, hey, I want you to Do things.
Finish the mission.
Involving the back door, if you will.
Well, and apparently the front door and all doors.
You mean the gluteus muscle?
The gluteus muscle.
I like how you put that.
I don't think he meant muscle.
The sphincter.
I think he meant twixt the between.
Yes, betwixt the sphincter.
The rumpus.
He meant the black hole.
Oh jeez.
Starfish.
The winky.
Yes, the area where no one should go near on a man.
No.
Ugh.
I mean, unless you want to.
I don't want to... Well, of course.
I guess he can't go.
Is this right, Gerald?
He's moving from Houston to... Well, he's one of the best quarterbacks in the league, right?
For the Houston Texans.
He can still play the game.
That's not the issue so far.
He's not as relaxed.
No.
But his sponsors, he's got some really big sponsors, Reliant Energy, Beats by Dre, and Nike, and they've all cut ties with him over this because that's obviously what everybody's going to do right now.
It's not like a few women have come out, it's 22 women who have come out and filed lawsuits against him.
And the team's trainer.
Well, yes, absolutely.
Maybe he just doesn't know what a massage actually is.
Well, you know, maybe it's a different definition for everyone.
I don't know.
He's like, I thought the butthole was part of the massage thing.
I mean, I puck a lot.
Well, he's probably got an achy butthole.
He's probably under a lot of stress right now and can't go relieve it.
Just sitting at home like, why do I do this?
He's just using like two back massagers.
Something's got to take me to my special place.
So, yeah, one woman, Ashley Salas, I think her name is, claims Watson assaulted her while she was trying to give him a massage.
And Watson's lawyer, Rusty Hardin... No!
No!
No!
That's his name, Rusty Hardin, which is actually one of the things he asked for.
How is that his name?
They're going in front of Judge Rusty Trombone.
Yeah, Rusty's lawyer... Sorry.
His lawyer, Rusty Hardin, said the allegations were... She's a real lawyer.
Real name.
She's a real name.
Why would you hire him?
You're a lawyer!
Change your own name legally!
Come on!
He has all the paperwork and can do it for free.
What if he's a ginger?
He probably is.
We need a picture of Rusty Hardin.
Esquire.
I'm Rusty O'Harden.
Dropped out of school.
My family came over to America.
He said that the allegations were meritless and part of a blackmail scheme, which I will give him.
It does seem like a very convenient time for all these women to kind of come out of the woodwork or essentially committing crimes and say that this happened.
It's just very strange.
But we, uh, we, hey, we aren't here, you know, we're supposed to have a rusty hardened Photoshop.
Is that right?
Uh, I don't have one here.
Where's Brendan?
I thought that was supposed to happen.
Did Brendan not- Can someone please find Brendan?
We're supposed to have a rusty heart in Photoshop.
This is what?
Any you guys seen Brendan anywhere I saw someone doing something in the bathroom.
room. Get out!
I'm in the bathroom!
It's occupied!
Man, I knew that's what happened to his arm.
Totally normal, right?
It's a cheese epidemic.
If the Hunter Biden world is okay, then so is this.
He's been sharing Cheezels.
You never share your cheese with anyone.
Gotta do it yourself.
Well look, poor Deshaun Watson, right?
Potentially.
But also jerk Deshaun Watson, potentially.
I'm not leaning either way.
I'm not saying that these women didn't have these things happen to them at all, and I'm not saying that Deshaun Watson is a saint.
I have no idea.
You're not a lawyer.
You're not Rusty Trombone.
Rusty Hardin.
I think the timing is a little curious.
He was about to sign probably one of the largest contracts in NFL history for a quarterback.
One of the best guys out there.
Highly sought after by every team looking for a quarterback.
And this comes out in the midst of him trying to force his way out of Houston.
Maybe he wanted out of Houston because he had all of these allegations following him around.
He's like, I have no more parlors I can go to.
They all know me now.
Well, he wanted fresh meat.
Yeah, something.
I have no idea.
But the guy go in and they're like, hey, buddy.
It seems odd.
And then the lawyer for a lot of these women basically just released these claims with no supporting evidence at all initially into the media for about a week, week and a half.
So, I hope it's not true, but I have no idea.
It just seems a little suspect to me right now.
It does.
I mean, we can't speculate too much, you know, since I don't know all the details yet.
But I mean in the meantime, here is the 7 plus 1 new endorsement deals for Don Watson.
Yes.
You'll forgot Sivan in the chamber!
There's always one in the chamber, right?
That should be it.
Number seven, Jack in the Box.
Well, that's obvious.
Low-hanging fruit.
Yes, that's what I pick.
I'm very short, I can't reach the high stuff.
So, number six, why don't we go to Quarter Black?
Kleenex for design watch, son!
That's right.
Oh, there's the translation.
See, I gotta do it at the same time.
It's a little hard.
Number five, what do we got?
All right, he's co-starring with John Travolta, one of your favorite actors, in the new movie Pants Off.
I want his pants off.
Also, Travolta known for the massage.
That's what I hear.
He's known to have had a few.
Yeah, like mid-air when he's the pilot and he walks out and he's like, you're going to want to take care of this.
Who's on autopilot?
That's right.
Number four, Papa Craw.
In-N-Out.
Oh, I get it.
Furburger.
Oh my goodness.
What?
Whoa!
Wait, you've never dropped a burger on the carpet?
Is that?
No.
Is that what it?
I don't know.
Is that one of those secret animal burger things you have to order?
That's correct.
Yeah.
In-N-Out?
Yeah, they don't have it on the menu.
It's a legit thing.
Yep.
It's true.
It's like when you go to pizza places and you ask for more than pepperoni.
You don't know.
Just guessing.
Number three, traffickers table showers.
Who makes table showers?
Because they're only used for that.
Like nobody takes a table shower at home.
You're not going to go lay on the table and instead it's where 80 guys have been before you and you're like, yeah, rinse me off.
Is this what will wash away my sins?
Nope.
Negative.
Number two.
Ming's dry rub.
Oh, it doesn't, doesn't go on wet.
Number one... What you got?
You wanna do it?
This is all you, buddy.
If you're uncomfortable... Alright.
Beat offs by Andrea.
That's a new one.
You gotta replace the headphone sponsor, man.
You know?
They're like Beats by Dre, but not at all.
More handy.
Yeah, they're very handy.
That's well done.
Line of the day.
Thank you.
All right.
Number one, though, is Jerk Soda.
And we actually have a commercial that he's filmed for this.
Already?
I don't know if you knew.
Yeah, he already made the commercial, so they can't really drop him since they signed him.
I don't know how they knew about all this, but let's take a look.
Or not.
Eventually.
Oh my goodness.
He threw the kid his towel.
That's so sad.
Oh my heavens.
That's just not nice.
That's 7 plus 1, right?
Yeah, that's 7 plus 1!
Thanks for watching.
I think there's always one.
And it always stays.
And you always forget every time.
Even when you're done, it's like magic.
Even with Russian roulette.
Pretty much.
Which they played yesterday.
Well, we're prevented from playing.
Prevented.
Well, prevented.
Well, Bill was.
Thank the Lord.
Bill was here yesterday in the same outfit.
I know.
That's an iconic commercial and I can't believe that they would do it like that.
Yeah, what a rehash.
Come on.
Get some creativity.
It really, it's strange too because it doesn't even really, it just looks like his head hastily cut on the other one's butt.
I mean, it was like we did it almost.
Yeah.
It seems completely normal.
They're better than that.
We didn't.
They're better than that.
But fortunately, when you come up with a last minute idea, you have a crack team to get it done.
Nails it.
You guys really are amazing.
Anyway, I don't know if you guys know this, journalists are still stuck on Trump.
Yeah.
Last weekend, Brian Stelter... Stelter?
How do you say it?
Helter Stelter is all I hear.
Okay.
Last weekend, Brian Helter Skelter and Jim Acosta discussed how they're still recovering from the trauma of the Trump presidency.
I'd love to hear from both of you how DC journalists are adjusting to the Biden era.
Jim, this is your first weekend anchoring here on Saturday and Sunday afternoons.
Do you feel like your rundown, your lineup, is really different than it would have been in the Trump years?
When you're asking if I was run down, I thought you were referring to how I felt during the Trump era.
Uh, no.
I think that, you know, listen, I think we're all dealing with some post-Trump stress disorder.
Wow.
Wow.
You are fake news.
I prefer the guy in the middle on Modern Family.
Do you see his smile, though, there at the end?
That is the smile of a supervillain.
Yeah, it is.
It really is.
He's a creep.
Diabolical.
I don't know if we can pull it up, but it's, yeah.
Are you a big fan, Crawdaddy?
They have just given up all.
All intention of objectivity.
It's just brutal to watch.
Well, they don't have a villain.
They think they're a news organization.
Yeah, they don't have a villain.
And that's why we have to watch.
They're bored now.
They're still talking about it.
Who is that?
Is that the Pepperidge Farms guy?
Is this the George Floyd trial?
It is.
It is, yeah.
He's an expert witness, I think.
Oh, of course, here's this guy.
He wears the same mask every day.
And he's whispering.
Yeah.
Share it with the class.
He doesn't want to be seen.
I'll tell you what, cookies are the best.
That's why they were inside of Cup-A-Foods.
Oh, no.
You could get... Nope!
Third one.
You know who isn't?
You.
You're not an expert in this field.
Yeah, what are you talking about?
He's not.
expert in this field. But also he talks about George Floyd being... You know who isn't you?
You're not an expert in this field. Yeah, what are you talking about? He's not.
And you combine that with not just the idea of the kneeling, but he adds a new element here.
The idea of the manipulation of handcuffs. Red Rover.
All right, let's move on.
What does cup of foods even mean?
It makes me think of Sack of Suds.
Remember from my cousin?
It's just cup foods.
Yeah.
Like you go in and you walk out and you're like, oh, I got a cup of meat.
You just grab a cup as you go in.
It's, you know, like with the nuts and the candy and stuff.
You just fill it up with whatever.
Strudel.
Just anything.
Strudel, preferably.
If I'm in there.
Cordon Bleu.
People always say, Dave, you look like a strudel guy.
Anyway.
CNN.
CNN was probably too traumatized to cover this, but we here at Louder with Crowder have actually obtained exclusive audio from a leaked phone call between former VP Joe Biden and President Trump.
President Harris' office, this is Joe.
Yes, can I please speak to a Mr. Puppet?
A puppet?
Correct.
First initials I am.
Sure, yeah.
I am.
A puppet?
Not sure.
Let me ask.
Does anyone know... I am a puppet?
Anyone?
I am a puppet!
He did it!
He did it!
Oh, come on.
What in holy hell?
You... You stop calling here, okay?
Come on!
You're a puppet, Joe!
A huge puppet!
You just said it, Joe!
Hey, come on.
Listen, let me tell you something.
If I ever find out who you are... Okay, I'm not joking.
When I get my hands on you... I'm serious.
I'm gonna pull out your eyeballs.
Okay, with a corkscrew, man.
Oh, are puppets in the habit of using corkscrews?
Okay, come on, guys.
Did you hear?
He said, did you hear about the corkscrew?
All right, come on, guys.
We gotta change this number.
Man, he really does change his diaper a lot.
That's a shame.
Yeah.
Anyway!
Oh, and you gotta go, you gotta go.
Yeah, that's true.
And you gotta go right now, gotta go.
What's that?
Jingle?
Right now.
Is it for Depends?
Gotta go, gotta go, gotta go right now.
Is it Depends?
Gotta go, gotta go, gotta go.
How many jingles are we gonna sing in this?
Lots of jingles!
That's why they call me Jingles.
Is that your stripper name?
It is.
Welcome to the stage, Jingles!
I have two boys at home that are looking for their Papa Hunter.
It's tough times when Hunter has to hit the pole too.
Yeah, well Hunter has hit the pole many times.
What happened?
What?
Where are we?
Shut up.
You know the thing!
Comments!
Comment, comment.
Yes, comment, comment, comment.
Also, come see me.
I have a lot of upcoming shows, and I'm going to use this moment to pitch those.
Where are you at next?
I'm going to be in Port Charlotte, Florida next week, Las Vegas, Nevada.
I'm also going to have dates at the Addison Improv and the Houston Improv in June that are going to go up, and it's going to be during the week.
So if people happen to be in Texas, they can come hang out.
There you go!
I like it!
And then Toledo, Ohio.
And yeah, they'll be free for you guys.
And stop throwing the fruit, guys.
Dave has plenty of money to buy his own vegetables.
That's true.
Yes, vegetables just like Biden.
And also, don't do cheese, guys.
It's a serious thing.
And if you want to comment down here, you can happily tell us how cheese has affected your life.
But until then, I guess we should just say, to what to YouTube?
Cheese off?
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