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April 21, 2020 - Louder with Crowder
02:33:42
TRUMP PRESS BRIEFING LIVE STREAM! | Louder with Crowder
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Time Text
🎵Dum de dum de dum dum🎵 🎵When I'm with you, I'm with you🎵
🎵Sing a lullaby🎵 🎵And a lullaby🎵
🎵All alone on a lone moon🎵 🎵And you will always answer🎵
🎵Sing a lullaby🎵 🎵And a lullaby🎵
🎵And a lullaby🎵 🎵All alone on a lone moon🎵
🎵Listening to all the things you can't hear🎵 🎵No matter what life is🎵
🎵Always we stick out, you should know🎵 🎵No matter what life is🎵
🎵Always we stick out, you should know🎵 🎵Every star🎵
🎵Dum dum🎵 🎵Wherever you are🎵
🎵Every star🎵 🎵And you will always answer🎵
🎵Every star🎵 🎵Dum dum🎵
🎵Wherever you are🎵 🎵Find me🎵
🎵Dum dum🎵 🎵Dum dum🎵
🎵Dum dum🎵 🎵Dum dum🎵
🎵Dum dum🎵 🎵When I'm with you🎵
🎵I'm with you🎵 🎵Dum dum🎵
🎵Dum dum🎵 🎵Dum dum🎵
🎵When I'm with you🎵 🎵I'm with you🎵
🎵Forever🎵 🎵And ever🎵
🎵Always🎵 🎵And you will always answer🎵
🎵Forever🎵 🎵And ever🎵
🎵Always🎵 🎵Always🎵
🎵I wanna stay like this🎵 🎵No matter what life is🎵
🎵Always we stick out, you should know🎵 🎵No matter what life is🎵
🎵Always we stick out🎵 🎵Always we stick out🎵
🎵Every star🎵 🎵Forever🎵
🎵Forever you are🎵 🎵Every star🎵
🎵And you will always answer🎵 🎵Every star🎵
🎵Forever you are🎵 🎵Forever you are🎵
🎵Forever you are🎵 🎵Find me🎵
🎵Always we stick out, you should know🎵 🎵No matter what life is🎵
🎵Always we stick out, you should know🎵 🎵I know you🎵
🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵
🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵
I don't know where we're gonna end up.
Come on.
Come on.
I thought it all out.
It just wouldn't work.
Beautiful.
Loveable.
Kissable.
Profoundable.
It just isn't done that way.
The son of the queen.
The life hack.
Multiple options.
Yes, those poor people.
Well, um, now we're making it more fun.
The new life going.
The art gets fun.
That's me too.
The life hack.
Isn't he stunning?
The life hack.
That's me too.
The life hack.
Come on.
Don't overdo it.
That's me.
I get stunning.
Profoundable.
That's me.
That's me.
I get stunning.
Profoundable.
That's me.
I get stunning.
Profoundable.
The son of the queen.
The life hack.
Multiple options.
Yes, those poor people.
Well, um, now we're making it more fun.
The new life going.
The art gets fun.
That's me.
The life hack.
Isn't he stunning?
The art gets fun.
That's me.
The life hack.
Isn't he stunning?
The art gets fun.
Profoundable.
That's me.
I get stunning.
Profoundable.
That's me.
I get stunning.
Profoundable.
That's me.
In Rome.
Completely atrocious, I always had to be careful though, just in case.
aperfect.
oh what a beautiful sunset perfect.
om magari
go aim
I yes
and moved
moved moved
moved moved
and and
and it begins
I'm sorry.
Look at this.
You're not gonna find another girl like her in a million years.
It's all so magical.
Done.
And I've never had fun.
Sorry, Rod.
That fest.
Someday a boo.
End of the fest.
I've never done it and I've never had fun.
I'll ride that fast someday, boo.
Do you trust me?
Ch-ch-ch-say to me, have my wonderful time, my beautiful love
Father and son to say, mm-mm, mm-mm Ch-ch-ch-say to me, have my wonderful time, my beautiful
love Father and son to say, I'm going to free the genie
Free, I ran away I'm free, and I am not going back
Free, and I am not going back You should, you should
I'm free, I ran away I'm free, and I am not going back
Let's make some magic!
Do you want to play?
Nighty-noo-night I spent the day with you, don't forget that
Nighty-noo-night Do you want to play?
Nighty-noo-night I spent the day with you, don't forget that
Nighty-noo-night Do you want to play?
Nighty-noo-night I spent the day with you, don't forget that
Nighty-noo-night Do you want to play?
Nighty-noo-night I spent the day with you, don't forget that
Nighty-noo-night There's this girl
I've done and I've never Fallen, I've arrived at Fes
Someday I'll move End of the stage
Small time in my life, I'll view I've done and I've never
Fallen, I've arrived at Fes Someday I'll move
End of the stage I'm free, I ran away
I'm free, and I am not going back Free, and I am not going back
You should, you should I'm free, I ran away
I'm free, and I am not going back I'm free, and I am not going back
Ah ha ha!
Oh, I'm the devil, get my, it's my I'm the devil, get my, it's my
Ah ha ha!
Death, and your future tokens They'll make you strong
It's my, the devil, get my, it's my Ah ha ha!
Death, and your future tokens They'll make you strong
Ah ha ha!
Oh, so magical What are you doing?
Just playing along Hmm
I'm playing Night, night
I spent the day I don't care about
Ending last I'm playing
Night, night I spent the day
I don't care about Ending last
I'm playing Night, night
I spent the day I don't care about
Ending last I'm playing
Night, night I spent the day
I don't care about Just, just, say to me
Have my, my wonderful time And my, your short salam
Father, and don't you say Hmm, hmm
Just, just, say to me Have my, my wonderful time
And my, your short salam Father, and don't you say
Hmm, hmm Never done, and I've never
Worn, or got, or got that dress So maybe, and don't you say
Hmm, hmm Never done, and I've never
Worn, or got, or got that dress So maybe, and don't you say
Chase A wondrous place
For you Me!
That's who!
Goodbye.
Thank you.
Goodbye.
I'm going to be on the side.
She's She's
We empty out all the money in the cash register and Mr.
Duncan just...
And Mr. Duncan just...
Duncan just...
Look at this.
Duncan just...
And Mr. Duncan just...
Duncan just...
Kevin?
Duncan just...
Mr. Duncan just...
Duncan just...
Mr. Duncan just...
Duncan just...
Mr. Duncan just...
Duncan just...
Duncan just...
Mr. Duncan just...
Mr. Duncan just...
Duncan just...
Duncan just...
Mr. Duncan just...
Duncan just...
Duncan just...
Hold it right there.
He would give him one.
Mr. Duncan just...
My own money has bothered me.
I have one for everything.
A pen, a galosh, a TV, a bird of array, a paladin, two tushies.
He would give him one.
Mr. Duncan just...
My own money has bothered me.
I have one for everything.
A pen, a galosh, a TV, a bird of array, a paladin, two tushies.
He would give him one.
Mr. Duncan just...
My own money has bothered me.
I have one for everything.
A pen, a galosh, a TV, a bird of array, a paladin, two tushies.
He would give him one.
Mr. Duncan just...
My own money has bothered me.
I have one for everything.
A pen, a galosh, a TV, a bird of array, a paladin, two tushies.
He would give him one.
Mr. Duncan just...
My own money has bothered me.
I have one for everything.
A pen, a galosh, a TV, a bird of array, a paladin, two tushies.
He would give him one.
Mr. Duncan just...
My own money has bothered me.
I have one for everything.
A pen, a galosh, a TV, a bird of array, a paladin, two tushies.
He would give him one.
Mr. Duncan just...
My own money has bothered me.
I have one for everything.
A pen, a galosh, a TV, a bird of array, a paladin, two tushies.
He would give him one.
Mr. Duncan just...
My own money has bothered me.
I have one for everything.
A pen, a galosh, a TV, a bird of array, a paladin, two tushies.
He would give him one.
Mr. Duncan just...
My own money has bothered me.
I have one for everything.
A pen, a galosh, a TV, a bird of array, a paladin, two tushies.
He would give him one.
Mr. Duncan just...
My own money has bothered me.
I have one for everything.
A pen, a galosh, a TV, a bird of array, a paladin, two tushies.
He would give him one.
Mr. Duncan just...
My own money has bothered me.
I have one for everything.
A pen, a galosh, a TV, a bird of array, a paladin, two tushies.
He would give him one.
Mr. Duncan just...
My own money has bothered me.
I have one for everything.
A pen, a galosh, a TV, a bird of array, a paladin, two tushies.
He would give him one.
Mr. Duncan just...
My own money has bothered me.
I have one for everything.
A pen, a galosh, a TV, a bird of array, a paladin, two tushies.
He would give him one.
Mr. Duncan just...
Yeah.
Smooching with your blood, my highly nutritious Yeah
Q-Dig, give him one Mr. Duncan is
My own body, it's bothering me, I have one Smooching with your blood, my highly nutritious
Yeah Q-Dig, give him one
Mr. Duncan is My own body, it's bothering me, I have one
A TV Smooching with your blood, my highly nutritious
Yeah Smooching with your blood, my highly nutritious
Yeah you
Oh Hey, there we go.
Welcome to the presidential- is it the press briefing?
It's the press.
It's the press briefing.
I just realized, do we need the microphone on this side if I'm going to be turning to Gerald?
We should be good.
Okay.
The press briefing live stream.
Just so you know, we're not going to- it's not like the Oscars stream or whatever other award- what other streams have we done?
Oh, CNN fact check, which we'll do next Thursday.
We want to do the job that the media isn't doing, namely broadcasting the briefing from the President of the United States, especially considering the executive order.
Yeah.
This week regarding, well, today.
Yesterday or today?
It's so simple.
Was it yesterday that he signed it or today?
Yesterday.
That's right, it was yesterday.
Immigration.
420.
Time is a funny thing.
Sorry, I'm a little distracted because I hear Betty barking outside.
She's trying to get in.
It's like, she wants to be a part of the stream.
It's like Cujo.
Doors rattling.
The promo code, by the way, is quarantine to get $30 off.
Huge.
It is MugClubQuarantine is the hashtag.
Do we have a hashtag for the stream today?
Not for this stream.
Okay, but we do have some drinking game rules, by the way.
Bring them up there.
Audio Wade, sound them out because I can't see what they are.
The number one rule is every time Trump says China, you have to drink.
China!
Hit the ding!
And then number two, drink twice if POTUS destroys a reporter.
Those are our two rules.
Destroyed.
Looking forward to that.
We're practicing.
He does that a little bit.
Donald Trump has a little bit of the Don Rickles sort of gross face.
You?
Huh?
You should go live in Poughkeepsie with a broom.
Call him your wife.
What?
He says what?
Huh?
Very clippable.
What are you talking about?
Don Rickles?
I've never wanted to watch a briefing more in my life, though.
Every time he does them, I love them.
They're hilarious.
Sometimes I agree with him, sometimes I disagree with what he says, but they're always funny and entertaining.
And sorry we started late, but we started late because our president can't be bothered to be on time.
It's true.
You know, what do we expect here today?
What do you expect here, Joe?
Well, you probably ought to, right?
So I expect for him to get a lot of pushback on the executive order that he issued.
I think that will probably be one of the biggest topics of conversation because it's the easiest punch to throw at him right now.
And then they'll follow that up with the reopening and the challenges with that.
And then probably I don't know.
If there's somebody with some balls in the room, they'll ask about this study that came out of California and the death rates.
So we'll see.
Yeah, this is prime time.
I said if somebody has any chutzpah, they will ask that question.
I just don't know that that's actually going to happen.
And just so you know, we are not streaming CNN, CBS, ABC.
We're streaming directly from the White House.
So if we get taken down, you know that everyone here will be voting Biden.
There's no doubt.
White House, don't take us down.
We're here to help.
Yes.
So what do I expect here today?
And again, the promo code is quarantine.
Tomorrow we have Dan Crenshaw on the show, by the way.
And then Ted Cruz on Thursday.
Getting a lot of guests.
This is just a patriotic week.
People are getting a little bit pissed off.
You know what?
I think rightfully so.
I think we are going to look back on this time and go, gosh, What a massive overreaction.
So much... I don't know if you can even go to the HuffPo homepage there, Gibbon, but... Who wants to do that?
Today, I saw HuffPo, they were saying the long-term effects of COVID-19 on the body, and then it was, COVID-19 is child's play compared to what's coming down the pike.
I said, well, why don't you talk about what's in the pike?
Sure, yeah.
What is that?
Or what's in the headlines?
Maybe that'll be helpful, yeah.
Yeah, there's no anti-COVID...
Salve right now in the pike.
Sure.
Still, that's primarily what we're dealing with, but they want to move on because I'll get to a couple of them in just a while.
But we can't talk about what treats it.
No, that would be... No, we can't talk about what treats it.
That's racist.
And this is, by the way, so this, I think this is important.
The fact that... And I bet you they're going to bring this up with Donald Trump.
By the way, the executive order with Mexico to me is just absolutely... Great crises.
Are they startled?
Is that them?
I'm not seeing anything right now.
It's probably just a hot place.
Is that HuffPo?
No, that's HuffPo.
That's HuffPo.
The autoplay.
I hate you autoplay.
And a hot lady who looks like she just got out of the shower.
Stephen, she's real.
Yeah, anyway, if you go to HuffPo, you'll be able to see the headline.
So, with the executive order, some people are saying, well, how can you be against the lockdown, but want to lock down the borders?
Well, because I don't think that we should shut our country down and simultaneously have open borders.
I don't understand.
Why do you think that we should have the country, the economy open, but not the borders?
Checkmate?
No, no, no, no, no.
Because I think we should open the country in an orderly, reasonable way, as you see with President Trump's three-phase sort of guidelines.
We can't be letting people flood through the borders at all.
Well, and also, not every country has the same kind of lockdown strategy that we've had.
They've not all had the same success containing the virus that we have, and so somebody could come in and get past all the screening and start off another wave.
So you don't want to necessarily let that happen anyway.
I don't think it's a bad thing to limit immigration right now and open the economy at the same
time.
Well, here's the thing.
You know, we didn't really have to do it.
It's actually very smart.
It's more symbolic.
Sure.
But I love the symbolism.
And the symbolism is basically like it's the apparatus from Seven for the sin of lust.
Oh, that's basically what the symbolism is.
He did!
Donald Trump is saying, all right, listen, okay, you want to play this?
All right, I'm going to use an executive order on immigration.
It's more appropriate than a lot of executive orders that could be enacted, but I don't think it's going to be long term.
And this is just, again, to get them to go absolutely nuts.
But it is amazing to me.
This is one thing I bet you'll see.
It works every time.
The fact that it was front page everywhere.
If we're all in this together, then we should all be celebrating together when we get good news.
Sure.
Right?
If we go back, someone can maybe put together a timeline where the first time we talked about this, we said, hey, listen.
Oh, and by the way, I forgot live chat.
You were live chatting, of course, at the Blaze.
We're not doing live chat, super chat on YouTube because YouTube doesn't pay us anything.
No.
Why should they?
They pay us very little.
Oh.
Yeah.
So it's not nothing, but it's not little.
No, little being zero.
Oh, zero.
Like, absolute zero.
But they pay us in goodwill.
Really?
That's nice of them.
I haven't seen that either.
I was about to say.
That's pretty generous there.
Oh my gosh.
So, we should all be celebrating good news together.
By the way, oh shoot, hold on a second.
Even if you're, this is my favorite cigar.
Oh, is that the one?
That's my favorite cigar.
What's your favorite cigar?
Somebody get it.
I got rid of the band like a Philistine.
Somebody freeze it.
I don't want people ordering up.
It's a limited release from one lot.
Now they know.
Nicaragua, and I've said too much.
You won't get anymore out of me.
Really?
Hey, look!
I didn't even know we had a cutout back there!
That's lovely, isn't it?
I got Trump right over my left shoulder.
I love it.
So we should all be celebrating good news together.
Well, here's the thing.
And I talked about this with Ben Shapiro before we were talking about the mortality rate.
I said, hold on a second.
The mortality rate really isn't a consistent measurement.
We have to look at overall deaths.
And he said, yeah, but that'll just go up.
Sorry, I said deaths per million, right?
Deaths per capita.
Per capita deaths.
And you actually couldn't go per capita deaths any lower than a million.
Is that the starting line?
Well, it is for this.
Oh.
Can someone search what capita means?
I don't think it's per million.
You can do per thousand.
No, exactly.
But you have to start at a million, otherwise it wouldn't even show up on the graph.
Yes.
So, if you look at the deaths per capita, that's what really matters, because you can't just say total deaths in the United States and compare it to, say, you know, Botswana.
I have no idea what the numbers are in Botswana, but I assume they're probably not great.
Probably not great when there is no COVID going on.
And there's not as many people in Botswana last I checked.
I don't know.
That was the initial point I was making.
Correct.
I'm glad we got there.
So that's the number that matters.
I'm clarifying for those out there.
And I know Ben told me, he said, yeah, but that number's only going to go up.
Sure, but it's also going to go up with other countries.
By the way, surprisingly not really going up in Sweden the way that most people thought would be happening because they didn't enact some kind of lockdown like you saw with Italy, Spain, Belgium.
I don't know about Belgium, sorry, but Italy, Spain, France, and of course they're actually hit the worst and we're doing far better than them.
But the mortality rate changes the more infections that you see.
Now to me it would seem to be good news when you say oh my gosh
way more people have been infected than we initially thought
because that means the mortality rate is far lower and most people are
asymptomatic. Well I was yeah I was watching CNN and they actually talked
about that as being... I know you watch them when we weren't on here?
No I do it all the time. So I was watching CNN and they were talking about
well it sounds like there are more infections than we ever thought as if
that were a bad thing. Yeah. But obviously it does change the
CNN you are such a disease.
Were you in an airport?
Look what you did, you little jerk.
Ryan Stelter, you're what the French call les incompétents.
And gay!
I love it.
But explain why that would be a good thing.
Well, it would be a good thing because it lowers the mortality rate.
So let me bring this up, actually.
We have these numbers here today.
This is a study, by the way, from USC, and of course Los Angeles, the public health department.
Not necessarily a bastion.
Like, I don't think they're funded by one Rush Limbaugh.
No.
USC.
So they looked for antibody tests.
Now keep in mind there are two different things, okay?
And this is really, really good news.
Now, still be reasonable.
Still, obviously, we need to protect the most vulnerable among us.
Every single life lost obviously matters and is tragic and we feel for them.
And the 9-11 firefighters, first responders, NYPD after September 11th, nothing compared to the nurses right now.
They are our heroes.
Nope, not even comparable.
Name me any other hero.
Can't do it.
Nothing even comes to mind?
Nope.
Nelson Mandela?
Nope.
Martin Luther?
The Incredible Hulk?
No.
Maybe.
I'm trapped between a not wanting to be removed from YouTube and a racist place right now.
But the white 9-11 first responders, can we all agree, absolute scum compared to the nurses and doctors of today?
Absolute subhuman scum, the first responders of 9-11 compared, again context matters, compared to the first responders today who do so of their own free will and it hasn't put a nickel in their pocket.
Let me go back.
I want to say that you want to walk this back?
No, I don't want to walk this back.
I'm saying that you would be happy if they would celebrate that news.
I would be happy if they actually reported it.
Yeah, that would be nice.
If they would just put it out there.
I don't need a ticker tape parade for it.
I want to make sure that I have this right here.
This comes from USC and Los Angeles Public Health Department, okay?
They did an antibody test.
Now, what does that mean?
Someone may not test positive for coronavirus, for COVID-19, but if you test for antibodies, you can then see how many people have had it at some point.
Right, exactly.
Kind of like if you have mono, and I found this out at one point where I was like, I think I have mono.
The doctor said, well, a test really isn't going to help us.
I said, what do you mean?
He said, just tell me that you have mono, that you had mono.
That's why you can't test if it's current.
That's not scientific.
Because the only test that he had, I think, was the antibody test at his place.
I'm not exactly sure.
That's when I learned about antibodies.
That and the magic school bus.
And that little prick knew he should have stayed home today, but he didn't.
He never does.
Never does.
Follow your gut.
Ralph, whatever his name is.
Hey, Ralph, stop talking about it.
Was it Ralph?
I think so, yeah.
I think it was Ralph.
Ralph!
Ralph.
So back to USC, they looked for antibodies, right?
And they saw, they said, oh, this actually looks like it's between, I think, 2.8 and what, 5.6% of the people in Los Angeles County actually had antibodies, which means the number is 28 to 50, what, 28 to 56, something like that?
28 to 55 times higher, the infection rate, than they thought.
That means that at the low end, a minimum, and using this sample, so it shows that 220,000 people in Los Angeles County had had COVID, and at the high end, over 400,000.
So let's just take those numbers and split them right down the middle.
600 deaths total in Los Angeles County.
So that means, when you just take the total deaths, by the way, just the total deaths, and you look at the actual infection rate, again, this comes from USC, and they really, really don't want this to be the case.
And the only reason that this matters is because they talked about the first gun death in Detroit yesterday.
And that's front page news everywhere, when that's an exception to the rule.
Whereas now, we are actually getting enough data to determine what the rule is.
It hasn't been trending.
It hasn't been reported anywhere.
So, if you just take those numbers, use the middle numbers.
Let's play it conservatively.
That means that the death rate, at the worst, is 0.25.
The mortality rate.
When you take into account, people have actually had it.
Now, let's use these numbers.
I think in Italy we know it was 95-98% of people.
who contracted the disease who were deaths, they were over the age of 80, or they had some pre-existing condition.
If I'm not mistaken, in New York, it was high 80s in some figures that were cited to 90-something percent.
Let's play it really conservatively and say, okay, only 80% of the COVID deaths at this point, only 80% are from old people or people with pre-existing conditions.
That gives you a death rate, meaning if you are an average-aged, middle-aged, Above middle age of average health American right now in this country, your chances of dying from COVID-19, if you get it, is 0.02%.
Wow.
Wow.
Let's split the difference from 0.2, likely 0.1, to 0.02.
What's the difference?
That's insane.
From 0.2, likely 0.1, to 0.02, let's call it, let's just call it 0.1.
Let's just go with 0.1, a nice rounded number, because you know you have to do a point, and you have to add a zero after the point.
It gets difficult at a certain point.
We don't have the math Asians.
Some have it referred to as a decimal.
But I prefer point.
It's like triple dot.
I don't have time to say ellipses.
What am I, retired?
I just say ellipses, so that's fine.
At .1, what is it?
That's the influenza death rate every year, is .1, right?
If I'm not mistaken?
No, I think it's .06.
.06?
Okay, so I'm not super far off on that, but all of a sudden you start to see that this has a much lower mortality rate.
It's far more comparable than people led you to believe.
I'm not saying open everything up.
It's not the same thing.
You shouldn't be responsible.
That's not what anybody is saying.
But here's the thing.
That's not what the President is saying.
No.
Nobody's saying that we should just open up and go right back to the way we were.
What we're saying is that you can open certain things up and take precautions and still live life.
We live life every single day under the threat of dying.
Our whole existence is to not die.
We have food, we have shelter, we have safety features and cars to keep us from dying.
And so we can surely manage a situation like this.
What are we supposed to do?
Lock down everything forever?
I mean, really, because here's the concern.
The concern is that it's just like 1918, where it came out in the spring, it was not nearly as deadly, it came back in the fall, and people didn't respond appropriately.
Right.
Okay.
People think it might come back.
It should be noted, this isn't just a lone study.
It actually tracks with, we covered this a while back, the Santa Clara County study showed a similar number.
Yeah.
So, at the very least, the infection rates on the low side are minimum 28 to 30 times higher than we thought, likely 40-something times higher Then we thought, which is also why you have to throw out, we have the most infections.
What, we're the biggest country that's testing that much at this point, right?
You have to throw out this idea of how many hospitalizations.
And also something that's pretty funny to me, not funny, I should say, not funny, haha, nothing about this is ever funny.
It's all a tragedy.
We shouldn't laugh.
We shouldn't go back to our lives.
You should feel guilty for even watching this and even feeling the slightest sliver of entertainment.
Shame on you.
Shame, shame, shame on you.
I shouldn't even be having this cigar.
How dare you?
And it's your favorite cigar!
But the point here is... I don't even remember what my point was.
One criticism of Trump has been that he's been talking about raw numbers.
So saying like this is how many masks we have, this is how many ventilators we have.
Yeah, the numbers aren't relevant.
Well, the criticism has been that we don't, that he's not giving how many we need, so we don't know where those numbers are headed.
Fewer, yeah.
But if they don't, but they're doing the exact same thing back.
Actually, yes, but the thing is, he has done that, and then they just excoriate him.
So a good example, when they said, you know, Cuomo said they needed, was it Cuomo or de Blasio said they needed 40,000 ventilators.
I thought he was wrong, where Donald Trump said, where do they need 40,000 ventilators?
Most hospitals don't have... We need to look into what's happening with these ventilators.
And they said, look, he's trying to strong-arm the states and intimidate them.
They topped out.
They had 4,000.
They didn't even use them all.
Oh, that's what I was going to get to.
I think we have this right now.
It just went out on Twitter.
Remember, they were saying initially, if you think you have COVID-19, what did they say?
If you were young and you have symptoms, stay home.
Do not go to the emergency room.
Then today, lo and behold, at CNN, they say people are waiting way too long to go to the hospital for COVID-19.
What do you want me to do?
You're damned if you do.
Because they're afraid of catching it.
Of course, because you told them to stay home.
And then you had to lay off health care workers.
You had to furlough workers because there wasn't this storming of the hospitals, this sort of glut that we thought there would be.
And now they have to say, well, listen, you need to get to the hospital right away.
And what really bothers me about this too, I will say, is I saw an article at Huffington Post today.
So I expect all of this coming from reporters because Huffington Post, CNN are one and the same.
That's a silver lining here.
They really didn't want you to forget about COVID-19 going into the election in 2020.
Guess what?
Neither do I. I want you to remember this.
Matter of fact, I want you to remember this come 4th of July.
I want you to remember all of this.
Look back on it.
Set a date in your calendar right now.
Look at all the restrictions, all the liberties that you've given up as an American, and then see if they were worth it.
And then they try to tell you that you're basically a Nazi sympathizer if you protest Governor Whitmer, who, by the way, doesn't want to allow you to go buy a poinsettia, though you can buy a kilogram of wheat.
Or a car seat for a newborn baby.
To take them home from the hospital.
And these people protesting in Michigan.
I don't even know if you put them in car seats.
It's not like they're going out licking telephone poles.
They're driving in their car.
It seems to me that if we are concerned about the safety of Americans, you would want car seats for children.
Because far more children are harmed, I would imagine, in automobile accidents than will die from COVID-19.
And I think you're right.
But as Governor Whitmer says, screw them.
Screw them.
It fits on a shirt well.
It's just a picture of a car seat and it's Governor Whitmer saying,
bargain!
Nice.
Oh, we've got, oh, the hell?
No, no, no.
We have boxed wine.
Are you kidding me?
What else do we have here?
Andrew Cuomo said today that New York hospitalization is basically flat.
The overall curve is on the way down.
And by the way, who knows where the curve would be if they didn't add 3,700 extra deaths that we didn't test for but we think are COVID.
Right.
Yeah, and what the word they've been using for that on CNN is, presumed.
Right.
So it's like, yeah, okay, well, it's, and they're saying it's later diagnosed or presumed.
What a strange way to... Can we do this?
Can we play the game?
It's a mystery.
If you can do maybe on deaths, we can do maybe on infections and make the number even out a little bit.
Can we play by the same rules by chance?
But again, it's not maybe, it's a study from USC.
Yeah, well, I know, I'm just, I'm trying to use their words.
Yeah, use their standards.
No, I'm saying you're trying to jujitsu it.
I did, mentally.
But the problem is, they don't hold themselves accountable whatsoever.
That is a problem with the media right now.
There is no accountability.
What will happen?
They'll move on.
Jerks.
Keep in mind, do you know what was happening right before Corona?
And I mean, before it became, obviously, the sort of pandemic that we know it as now.
So, we have to go back even before de Blasio and Nancy Pelosi were saying, eat!
Out in Chinatown.
Do you know what was happening right before that?
Does anyone remember?
It was impeachment.
It was non-stop impeachment.
Do you remember what it was before that?
It was Russiagate.
Yeah.
Do you really remember what the main story was before that?
Really, it was Kavanaugh.
It went Kavanaugh and then Russia non-stop to impeachment and now coronavirus.
Right.
That's true.
You want to tell me that none of this is designed to try and drag this guy down going into 2020?
So when people say he shouldn't be bringing up any of this for 2020, well, first off, I think that he's bringing up a lot of the information is to try and correct the media.
But you know what?
You guys are trying to... This is entirely politicized.
If you're trying to destroy his chances in 2020 because you have a man with early-onset dementia who doesn't know the difference between a vase and his house cat, then he has the right to defend himself.
I think he absolutely has a right to defend himself, and that's why I loved the video that he put on for the press, and he kind of pointed, like you said a few times.
Any other president... That's you.
Yeah, that's you, jerk.
You remember when you said that?
By the way, I like that shirt.
It looks better than this shirt.
No, I think he has every right to punch back, and sometimes he does it in a way that maybe we don't love, and sometimes we absolutely eat it up, because it's like, that's exactly what they deserve.
They deserve to have their nose rubbed in the crap that they've been peddling for so long, but none of them will do that.
You don't rub your dog's nose in crap, you rub it in pee.
Is that what you did when you dog-sitted Hopper?
You get it real close.
Yeah, you don't rub his nose and poop.
He pooped on me the second time, so... No, he was fine.
Monkey see, monkey do.
He just got me out of bed at 2 in the morning and pooped on me at 3 o'clock.
Where did he learn it, Gerald?
Nobody's rubbing Hopper's nose in anything that he didn't want it rubbed in.
I'm talking about pooping on you.
I won't do it, I promise.
But anyway, they deserve that.
They really do, because they have not done their job.
And it's not only that they've not done their job, when they're called out on it, they turn a blind eye to it.
I really don't understand the psychology behind this.
How do you see very clearly a timeline and then pivot over here to something else?
It has to be nefarious at that point.
Hold on a second.
You don't understand the psychology?
I don't!
I don't understand how you can... Well, hold on.
I don't know how you can balance two things.
Sure.
One, saying you're absolutely after truth.
That's what balance is.
Right?
You could balance three things, jerk.
I was pointing that it was only two.
Okay.
Alright.
So, you could balance on the one hand saying that you are the voice of truth, right?
I think three things... The analogy would... Juggling would be more apt.
It would be... I'm sorry, I'm disrupting the... It depends on if they're a board, you know?
And like, you know, like... But you can say on one hand that you're after truth and make it sure.
Watch me balance these two chainsaws!
Three!
Three.
I get it.
Oh, I don't know.
No, no, no.
But you didn't want to hear it.
But on the one hand, saying that you're after truth, right?
And that you are for the American people.
And on the other hand, ignoring at every single turn obvious facts.
Yeah.
Right.
And it's the exact same thing that you declare that Trump is doing himself.
Obvious good news.
Well, and yet they've been unable to say that China has any amount of responsibility for this.
Shows that they're just using one of these as a weapon.
By the way, keep in mind, good news a lot of the time.
You can say that Trump is a bombastic ass.
Sure.
Far be it from me to disagree with you.
But the problem is you are consistently pushing bad news, and so he seems like the eternal optimist, where he goes, I don't know why they need 40,000 ventilators.
What he's saying is, it's not that bad.
We're going to send them what they actually need.
They go, how dare you?
Turns out they only need 4,000 ventilators.
We're not going to see the same kind of like we built these hospitals.
They're not using these hospitals right now.
They're shutting them down.
How dare you?
Turned out they weren't actually all the way filled the capacity with hospitals right now.
He's going, listen, the death rate is going to be a lot lower as we increase testing.
How dare you?
I'm amazed that we can't actually sanitize these masks.
We have some very fine liquids.
Now, 800,000 a day, masks, recyclable, can be sanitized.
How dare you?
Anytime he tries to present a sliver of hope.
And I will say to the media, I hate saying, how dare you?
But I will ask you, why do you present, for example, I saw it in Huffington Post where it said, Generation Z, their hope was lost before it could ever start because they don't know a world without crises.
Hold on a second.
I don't think this is bad.
First off, do we even think this is nearly as bad as 9-11?
I don't.
I honestly don't.
But then if you want to say this is so much worse than the greatest generation had it, can you imagine that for a second?
Can you imagine being 15 years old, right before World War II, and your dad saying, I know you're only 15, but you're going to be going into mandatory service, and guess what?
All of Europe?
Yeah, it's not Europe anymore.
Okay?
The only thing that stands between us and these fascist bastards... By the way, maybe it could be communists, because we don't know what's going to work out.
But either way, we're going to end up with fascism or communism, and they're both going to be coming over the ocean.
The only thing stopping them at this point is Winston Churchill.
So I'm going to take you to the shooting range right now, so you can hopefully get proficient before you get thrust onto the beaches, where you have a mortality rate, the kind of... I won't even tell you about it, because it will send shivers down your spine.
You want to compare that and say that that is nothing in contrast to today's...
And I know that we shouldn't be belittling it, but let's be honest here.
It's not even close.
And if Generation Z feels entirely hopeless, thank the Lord above they were not the ones storming the beaches of Normandy.
Well, if Generation Z is watching CNN, if Generation Z is watching the modern media or staying on Twitter for very long...
It kills in that Gen Z demo.
That's his demo, man.
I hope.
I hope so.
But if they're watching that, then of course they're going to feel like the world is constantly in crisis.
Sure.
Even you can't go outside.
It's so bad.
But these worldwide things like World War II weren't really felt on the ground in the same way.
And just because every single day, CNN wants you to feel like you're in crisis.
But if you limited yourself to sort of what's going on immediately around you, life's pretty good.
I mean, like, first off, Generation Z is the least affected in the sense—in the least affected health-wise.
They're the most affected as far as the economic ripples, right?
That's the thing, and they're going to start singing a different tune when they realize that and start looking for jobs in a hyper-competitive space.
The entire economy is going to be changing.
I think the thing that we'll see most change is probably automation, and sort of this merging of tech and industry, because we've kind of had one foot in, one foot out for a little while now, so let's sort of accelerate that.
You'll see Generation Z be furious once they have to enter the workforce, but health-wise, they're the least at risk.
Your great-grandfathers, some of you grandfathers, they had to storm the beaches of one of the most powerful military forces, ruthless military forces, Ever.
In the history of mankind, you have to put on gloves and a mask if you're really careful when you go pick up your order at Papa John's if you can't spare the Uber Eats 250 delivery surcharge.
And just to clarify, it's not that Gen Z has lived with the most chaos and disasters, they've lived with the most manufactured chaos and disaster.
Right?
They haven't lived... I mean, put yourself in the shoes of somebody who had to live through World War I, the global flu pandemic that pretty much... You think this is bad, shutting things down?
That was crazy.
Great times in the 20s, Great Depression in the 30s, and World War II in the 40s.
You're telling me that this is the same as that?
The Gen Zers had that kind of crisis to deal with?
And for a decade of that, you couldn't even have a cocktail!
Stanley Tucci couldn't show you how to make a Negroni because there were no Negronis.
And by the way, Stanley Tucci is full of crap.
A Negroni is the easiest cocktail to make.
He's not a mixologist.
One ounce gin, one ounce sweet vermouth, one ounce Campari.
That's it.
You don't even need to add bitters.
People are like, oh, this is what I didn't know that I needed right now is Stanley Tucci making a cocktail.
Take that, Tucci.
Take that, Tucci.
We know you're watching.
My point is, is that this pandemic affects older generations more than Gen Z anyways.
So what are you complaining about right now?
Go away, BuzzFeed.
Stop doing your bullshit.
Sorry, these articles, like, everything is negative.
Everything is negative.
Like, can we look on the bright side of any of this?
I'll tell you what's negative is that you added a little bit of a Sicilian lilt to when you said bullshit.
Bullshit!
It's a bullshit!
It sounds like Pacino doing Jimmy Hoffa.
How much Italian do you know?
Also, both of you sound about as much like Jimmy Hoffa as Al Pacino.
You equally sound like Jimmy Hoffa.
Well, which one?
He did the voice differently multiple times in the movie.
I can be one, you can be the other one.
I'm not really sure.
Do we know, by the way, has there been the vote yet on the small business relief bill?
I haven't seen the results of that, no.
So that was supposed to be voted on an hour ago.
I don't know if we have the results because we're getting here ready to do the live stream.
If someone can let us know.
You mean the things that the Democrats should have signed a week ago that they shouldn't have blocked?
Well, listen, and I understand, too.
It's not just that they're trying to block, because let's be honest, the Democrats would love to spend this money.
They would love to give this money out to small businesses.
They're blocking it because they want to shoehorn in some other frivolous crap.
But that's blocking it for blocking its sake.
They're like, oh, you need something from us?
But it is playing politics for the right to say you don't care about small businesses.
The fact is, what bothers me more is that the left, and you'll see them with this reporting right now, is they don't want people to be able to make a living.
They want them to think that it's for the greater good to not be able to make a living, which is crazy.
Do your part.
All businesses, all jobs are essential for the people who rely on them for a livelihood.
Tell someone, well, I can't put food on the table for my family.
Well, that's not essential.
So the government wants to replace what is essential with government checks, with government stimulus checks.
I mean, Andrew Yang would do that for the rest of his life.
Even though he tries to point to it working in Alaska, you're really talking about a few bucks and a cup of coffee a month.
You're not talking about $1,000 in perpetuity.
Alaska's not representative of the rest of the United States.
Inuit don't even have the same genetics.
That's definitely true.
Hey, Steven, we do have an update.
Oh, do we?
Got an update.
The Senate approves $480 billion package to help small businesses and hospitals expand testing.
Oh, look!
And I guarantee you Schumer's gonna go out and blurt his name.
We did this for you, America.
We fought with the Republicans and we got you the best deal possible.
Oh my gosh, really?
Again?
You know what?
The whole pizza gate thing obviously was a propaganda thing.
It was a hoax.
It wasn't true, okay?
So I'm not going to be peddling that here.
But I will say, you didn't need to go with a lie.
It's enough that Schumer looks like Lemony Snickets.
Yeah, no one's gonna try and shoot up a pizza parlor looking for kids in the basement that doesn't exist.
Just, you know, say that he's a cook and lemony snickets.
That's enough.
You can just move on from there.
So 480 billion dollars.
480, that's good.
That's needed.
It was needed a week ago.
There are a lot of people right now that don't make the week.
I hope someone asks or Donald Trump talks about this.
Remember the swastika at the Trump rally?
We're talking about at the shutdown protest rally.
It was from a Bernie rally from a while ago.
What is it with Bernie rallies and swastikas?
Almost every time you hear a story about a swastika, this is what I've learned as it relates to swastikas, if a story centers around a swastika Having been created in the last 20 years, it's not true.
Especially if made in poop.
And 10 times out of 10, they're backwards.
Yes, that's true.
And believe all swastikas, right?
I do, yeah, he put poop on the wall.
I mean, how can you forget that?
Yeah, they're like, poop swastika.
What is it, like, you have a trained monkey running around, but you're winging poop on
the wall?
If someone is a white supremacist, I don't think they would paint a swastika in poop.
That's like being, oh, that guy's a redneck, that guy's a redneck confederate, and he's
wiping his ass with a confederate flag.
It doesn't compute.
He would love that confederate flag.
Yeah, that's true.
Line up.
He's using it.
Yeah.
He's not dry-humping the Robert E. Lee statue.
He's honoring it.
Not again.
Not again.
I don't know.
They're still, they're always running late, these people.
That's the government.
And this is what bothers me about screens.
This is why I hate screens in every single restaurant nowadays.
I'm watching this screen.
There's nothing on that screen.
It's a completely useless screen.
And you go to a bar now, and every single bar determines that they have to have television screens because God forbid that we talk to each other and our phone screen isn't enough.
Remember when we were kids how cool we thought it would be to have a portable TV?
Now we have affordable everything, and we still look at the screens.
It just says live stream starting soon.
I've seen so much Saturday Night Live that I think somebody's going to come on and say, and now the president will address the country about COVID-19.
Right, yeah, Alec Baldwin with a shitty impression.
Yeah, exactly.
That somebody's going to talk, but that's definitely something that I've learned from TV.
Do you know how Alec Baldwin does his Donald Trump impression?
Please, tell me.
Six figures in hair and makeup style.
That's it.
Nothing else.
And a little bit of that pooching out the lips.
Speaking of that, at the very beginning of his presidency, and even when he was running and becoming kind of a main contender, your impression was so good, I was like, this is going to take off.
Somebody's going to come and get him, and then they took Alec Baldwin for SNL, and I was like, that's not even close.
Oh, there's some inside baseball.
You know about the SNL audition, right?
No.
What kind of star is that again?
Oh, you trickster.
You're not going to get the best of old Crowder.
I'm going to go find the rapper over here.
So we sent in some impressions.
We were told to actually communicate with some of them and send a DVD.
I think we actually had to send a physical DVD.
Nothing happened.
But what did happen was with the Jon Stewart thing where they said, hey, do you have anyone like this Steven Crowder guy?
But like, you know, not him.
Like, liberal.
Yeah, and my manager at that point worked with a lot of comedians who were correspondents on the Daily Show.
You know, not the man to be in Noah, the good correspondent.
Yeah, the real one.
And he was like, well, what do you mean?
They were like, well, we don't really have, like, political people on.
What?
He was like, well, what do you mean you don't have political people?
He was like, well, we don't, like, just, like, we like that he's young, we like that, you know, but, like, do you have, like, something similar, but not him.
And then when I released the email, I think it was back on the YouTube channel, it may have been removed from the Vox Apocalypse Purge, what happened was he dropped me.
And my manager was a conservative, by the way.
He had an agreement.
He said like, hey, listen, they're putting a lot of pressure on me.
I said, listen, Andy, I won't give you his last name.
I said, I understand.
Frankly, I don't really think there's a whole lot you can do for me now at this point anyway because I had a contract with Fox News at that point.
It was starting up and I had a contract.
So I said, you know what?
That's fine.
Let's just say we're still friends.
That's good.
Yeah.
So I've had that.
I've had that happen.
But I guarantee you that they would not be fans of my Donald Trump impression because I think it's great.
It's not even in the same ballpark as Alec Baldwin.
That and the Bernie impression.
Those are probably my two favorites.
No, stop it.
It is.
It is.
You know what my favorite impression that you do is?
Yeah, it's good.
Oh man, that was good.
He just did it.
Gerald B. I knew it.
You might need to work on it a little bit.
You can pull it out any time like that.
I thought it was maybe a blobfish.
I work on it.
Oh man.
So again, the promo code is QUARANTINE.
You will get $30 off using the promo code QUARANTINE through the month of April.
Yes.
And I think a lot of municipalities extended their stay-at-home order until May 18th.
Did they really?
Well, does that mean we have to do more Good Morning Mug Club?
Gerald, please.
Well, this will be really interesting, I think, as Trump does pull back a lot of this, the sort of restrictions and stuff.
Curtain was the word you were looking for.
Yeah, the curtain.
Yeah, so as he pulls back the restriction curtain, it'll be interesting to see how different states respond to that.
See if they ramp up.
Yeah, if we actually see federalism in action, or if we just see people fighting against Trump.
In fact, here's the thing too, as it relates to, what were you going to say?
I was going to say, I think they should respond differently.
Florida should respond differently than New York should respond differently than California.
They should assess.
I think the rest of the country should respond differently and that they should, like Yukon Cornelius with his own little iceberg, we should just axe pick all of Manhattan and push it off into the ocean.
I think if we all push we could make some progress.
I think we could.
I think it's a good plan.
I mean they have a significant economy, they can fend for themselves.
They should be able to.
That came close to separating, why not Manhattan?
Not even the boroughs want you.
Lift the bridges.
Oh, that's terrible.
It's not that terrible.
No, for them.
Imagine being trapped on the island once you've been pushed off.
Well, I guess, but it's good for us.
I don't think that's how geology works, but it's fine.
I've heard of continental drift, and I think this could possibly happen.
And by the way, the Canarsie gave that away for, what was it, 60 guilders worth?
Whatever it was, the old term.
It was like a ship full of pelts.
I think it was the Canarsie tribe from Brooklyn.
There were a couple of tribes that sort of were in Manhattan.
They didn't have a concept of personal property.
Talk about the one that got away, huh?
Boy, that little island that you thought nobody wanted sure appreciated in value.
All that happened was a little bit of air travel, a little bit of more sophisticated boats than your sealskin canoes, and all of a sudden you're going, damn it!
How do we let that one get away?
But we get our check every month.
They walk out of Manhattan and they're like, there's no farmland here.
Where's all the farms?
And we have to travel across a river to go anywhere?
That's a terrible plan.
You think there would have been like one Canarsie who had an annoying mother-in-law on the other side of the river and just wanted to stay in Manhattan, like plant his flag.
Take it when you pry this island from my cold, dead fingers.
I'm sorry, Ma, I want to eat, but I have to stand.
These pelts are so nice.
Feel your pelts, please.
It's so warm.
You can't get these pelts anywhere else.
That's awesome.
Still make his weight.
That happens.
What?
Are they bringing something up?
No, still make his weight.
Okay, so what else do we have here?
We have a couple of things that I wanted to get to.
Just keep talking.
We'll just keep talking.
The promo code is quarantine.
No, we're not going to be doing We may do, you know what, let us know if you want some more Good Morning Mug Club.
We may do half and half of the late night and the morning stuff.
Some of you guys like us doing the morning stuff.
It's a little more relaxed.
We hit stories a little bit earlier in the day.
It's fun!
It's fun!
But when I'm tired, like, from doing this, and I'm not, listen, here's the thing, I'm not complaining, I'm very grateful, but the reality is I'm obviously a little bit tired.
The first thing to go is my executive functioning and then my short-term memory.
That's how we get on.
So if I sound a little Biden-ish, I can still get out there and perform, but what does happen is I will forget my train of thought a little bit.
And do you ever get that point where it's like, I realized yesterday, do you guys ever get this where it's that wired and tired where you're too tired to do anything, but you're also bored?
with doing nothing? Yes. That's what I felt. Yeah. I understand exactly what you mean.
When you lay down to try and relax, you can't. Your brain is still going. And that's,
I think, the boredom part. And I feel like Donald Trump deals with those moments by tweeting.
Early in the morning, he's like, I can't be bothered with that. That's a good one.
and anybody you see.
And Biden just does it without his brain going at all.
He just shuts down the whole part.
Biden just drinks salt water.
It's like, no, you're supposed to soak the afflicted area in Adam's salt.
It's good for the bones.
Drinking it doesn't send it to your brain.
Eucalyptus.
I will say this too with the Fauci thing, because he'll be up here and people are calling him a rock star and then you have some people saying fire Fauci.
You know what?
I'm not on either of those sides.
I think he has some valuable insight.
I think he has some important insight, but people do need to remember.
I think it's on pause by the way, so we might want to make sure it's on pause.
People do need to remember that he isn't a business owner in the same way. He isn't an economist.
You can't only ask a health care expert. For example, when we were building this new
studio, we had people who were specialized and they were like, well, we want to do this with lighting
and this with lighting. We're going, hold on a second, we have to make sure that the
sound works. So that lighting grid doesn't really work. Or some people are going, well, we
want to do this with the air. We're going, hold on a second, we actually have to have offices
here and we have to have an edit bay here. Sometimes people who think only in light
in line with their vertical and that's why specialists are really valuable but that's
also why you don't make them a captain of a ship.
You don't have a Spock as a captain, you need a Kirk.
And so I think that Fauci is very valuable but him, when he starts getting out of his
lane a little bit...
Did I get it wrong?
No, you said Kirk.
No, no, no.
We just prefer Picard.
Oh, okay.
Is he the gay guy?
Hey.
No.
Sir.
Nothing wrong with it.
Nothing's unproved.
I would still respect him the same amount, which is very little.
Allegedly.
Is he actually gay?
No.
No, I think everyone thinks he's gay.
He's just friends with gay people.
I mean, that doesn't make you gay.
Thank you for clarifying.
I didn't know how that happened, really.
He just decided to Instagram a necking session with Ian McKellen to throw you off a scent.
I think that's what he's doing.
He's a performance artist.
He wants to keep us guessing.
So I think that Fauci needs to stay in his lane a little bit.
He does.
And by the way, you also do have to go back to balancing, right?
Or juggling.
How many things?
You need to balance people's livelihoods and people's lives.
And that's why it is relevant information that it's a 0.2 to 0.02% mortality rate with this disease.
That is relevant because I guarantee you if you give the American public that information, and you make sure that you deliver it on an ongoing basis,
they aren't going to act like these people are effectively, you know, commie sympathizers
out there, Nazi sympathizers who are saying, hey, I want to go back to work driving
around Lansing in their SUV.
Right.
Well, and with Fauci, I mean, people, the media basically pulled him from his role as
a doctor into the role of you tell us what we should do about everything with the economy,
right, and the country.
That's not the role that I think he even wanted to be in.
And that's definitely not a role that we want a doctor in.
And I don't think it's fair to say he's a rock star or that he should be fired because the same people were saying both of those things depending on the day and depending on what he said and how it aligned with their views of the crisis.
Right.
And so it was just very disingenuous to me to hear them say, he's the best, listen to him.
And then he would say something they disagree with.
And they're like, oh, we got a fire pouch.
I'm like, what?
Right.
You're the same person who said we should just listen to him.
And I will say I'm really, really disappointed in a lot of concertos out there who so willingly gave up liberties so quickly.
I agree.
And I don't mean liberties like, listen, yes, social, putting in a social distancing order, telling people they should stay at home when possible, of course, but shutting down businesses or fining people or arresting people for public displays of affection with their spouses in parks or getting on a bus without a mask.
When you look, I do think this is really important right now
because it's just, it's like, you know, you put a, what is it?
A frog in a boiling pot of water, but you put them in and where it's like lukewarm and then you slowly turn it up.
Yeah, I do that all the time.
By the way, it's a really cruel analogy.
It's disturbing.
Even though it's peaceful.
Jeffrey Dunham heard me do this and it made it into the mainstream lexicon.
Like, ah, it's like a frog in boiling water.
Jeez, what the fuck?
What are you talking about?
Why would you put a, who are you?
Glenn Close with the pet rabbit in Fatal Attraction?
Can't you find something else?
Like talk about a room getting a little bit toasty or adding steam to the rocks in the sauna.
You're talking about boiling a pet?
Yeah.
Anyway, that's what's happened here.
It starts with social distancing.
But by the way, don't wear masks.
We've been saying on this show, hey, you know what?
If masks protect someone else, maybe you should wear some masks.
I certainly think that masks are better in public than eliminating all commerce, but it started with social distancing.
Okay, fine.
Then it started with, stay at home.
People said, okay, if we can do that, fine.
Then they said, don't, actually, don't support any of these businesses.
Stay home entirely.
Okay?
Then they started locking down businesses, like in Michigan, where now you can't buy tile, carpet, flooring, plants, car seats.
And people said, okay.
Then they started arresting people on buses and in public parks.
I think that if you were just to look right now, snapshot, take today, go back a month and a half, go back to February, when we were still in impeachment, people would say, Oh my god, what?
That's gonna be America in a month and a half?
You're gonna be dragging a black man off of a bus because he's not wearing a surgical mask, which you said only two weeks earlier wouldn't work anyway?
But people now have been, it's been just their defenses, their liberty defenses have been gradually weakened, where we go, oh yeah, yeah, they're Billy, the beat cop is Billy clubbing the Afro, the person of color, and tearing him off the 695 bus.
Yeah, you know, he tried to get on the bus, didn't have a mask, what are you gonna do?
Well, I hope we learn our lesson from this because the comparison of World War II and World War II, we were putting our lives on the line to protect liberty, not only for us, but for the rest of the world, right?
And in this case, we freely gave that liberty up to panic and fear, right?
There are cases where we need to come together and do extreme things to mitigate the disease or crisis.
Were you the Walrus?
Cases?
When you said, come together.
Come together, okay.
Oh, I am the Eggman.
I am not the Walrus.
And that necessarily... Thanks for clarifying.
We were all wondering.
Gerald, please tell us.
I won't tell you.
Now, this is a small hill that I will die on right here, right?
I'm gonna die on this one.
I am not the walrus.
Not the walrus.
That's his fault, of course.
But we need to make these kind of decisions.
You should hear him do his rendition of, I've got no babes.
I'll go further than you because I have a brass pair.
to the threat and that's the only thing that we're asking for. We're not saying
it's a hoax neither did Donald Trump. We're not saying that this isn't real.
We're not saying that opening up the economy doesn't have its
potential risks. What we're saying is we're trying to balance that more
than two things. I'll go further than you because I have a brass pair. I think it's an
acceptable risk at this point. Oh I absolutely do.
I absolutely think it's an acceptable risk.
We all heard you say keep the economy closed, right?
We all heard it.
I did not say that.
We all heard it.
I'm Mr. Walrus, jerk.
What are you going to put, like, a dubbit over me and say that I kept it closed?
No, I didn't say that.
Going all out.
I want it open because, look, we take a risk every single day.
Here we go.
And I think this is no different.
With proper precaution, we can manage.
No, no, no.
They haven't started this.
This is just like when you go to the doctor's and you're in the main waiting room and they take you into a smaller waiting room.
Do you think those signs say, like, attention and then, like, fake news media?
Like, they're little jabs at all the fake news outlets.
I wouldn't be surprised if it said, attention, Jim Acosta, your wife's home alone.
I hope I don't make a call.
Because she'd rather go out with me than you because I'm a real man.
But I would never do that because I'm a faithful husband.
But your wife would take the offer.
It would be tough to fit that header.
It would.
It would.
But all we can see is attention, so that's good.
It's like fake news media this way.
I could see that.
Donald Trump is the kind of guy, if he were a fighter, would take the trash talk to a whole other level.
Oh my gosh.
He would.
That's why I want to see that Trump-Biden fight.
I want to be like, I'm so bad I make medicine sick.
And Donald Trump would be like, you know what?
I bend your wife.
I'm the best there ever was, the best there is, and the best there ever will be.
I hear your grandma has cancer.
That's a great comparison.
When people do that, we tend to love them, right?
When they talk trash to people, and Donald Trump does it, and he's like, oh, he's just a prick.
I can't believe he would say stuff like that.
Now, is this just scale, or is that middle guy on a booster seat?
He's so tall.
Is that the reporter?
Is it being played by Peter Boyle?
And I know he passed away, so it's in poor taste, but it's not a stab at Peter Boyle.
I'm a Boyle fan!
Are you?
I was just saying he's tall.
Why would you try and hang on that?
I'm not!
I'm asking a question.
Cuckoo ca-choo.
Son of a bitch.
I'm just asking questions, Steven.
I'm just asking questions.
Why is there fluoride in your tap?
Well, it's actually because of tooth decay.
Right.
That's what they want you to believe.
But what do you believe?
The common answer.
I'm just asking.
Every conspiracy theorist is, well, that's what they want you to believe.
Go back to your People magazine and talk about the Kardashians' asses.
I'll talk about the real facts that matter.
What facts are those?
Questions.
Questions.
Okay, Riff Raff.
This is amazing.
They haven't started.
They're 45 minutes late.
It's a power move.
It is a power move.
Yeah, it is a power move.
It's like a, you will be- No screens, I notice.
So I guess they don't have a video prepped for us to watch.
Guys, listen, today I'm here to play nice, okay?
I'm not here to rub it in your faces and eee eee eee.
Oh no!
I told them not to.
I told them not to but they're doing it anyway.
And it has a VHS built in!
Listen today, I'm gonna show a nice. Okay. I'm not here to rub it in your faces
It just plays field of dreams Lesson will be red violin
Oh Oh, here we go!
Bricks, bought and paid for by Big Scarf.
Okay, alright, listen guys, we're going to play the drinking game.
We are not going to be carrying this so much because we want to hear what they have to say, and we want you to actually be able to watch this, and we're doing the job that Brian Stelter refuses to do.
Because who wants to watch the briefing and hear a fat-closeted homosexual talk about it instead?
Drinking rules.
Every time Trump says China, or of course any time that he says testing China, you ready or drink twice if he destroys a reporter.
How long do you wait to come out?
Are you sitting back there like, alright, hold on, 30 seconds.
He's got his hype man back here.
He's jumping around.
It looks like a lady in a wedding dress is about to walk out.
Yeah, exactly.
Like the Gracie train coming out.
Y'all ready for this?
There we go.
There he is.
Thank you very much everyone.
I didn't know you were here.
I want to start by saying that our love and prayers of every American continue.
To be with our fellow citizens who have lost a cherished friend or a family member to the virus.
Amidst our grief, we're making tremendous strides against this invisible enemy.
Thanks to our aggressive campaign against the virus and the extraordinary talent of our medical professionals, our mortality rate remains roughly half of that of many other countries and one of the lowest of any country in the world.
Let's do a lot of things, but our medical professionals have been incredible.
Since we announced our guidelines on opening up America, as we call it, we say opening up America and we add the word again.
I think we can add the word probably again.
This is brainstorming, right?
Can we do that?
We can do that.
Send him back for rewrites.
They are making plans and preparations.
That was his punch-up.
In the very near future.
So that's 20 states.
It's about 40% of our country.
They're moving along pretty quickly.
Three announced today, as you know.
And they're going to be doing it safely.
They're going to be doing it With tremendous passion.
They want to get back to work.
The country wants to get back to work.
A short time ago, the Senate passed the Paycheck Protection Program and Healthcare Enhancement Act, with additional funding for the Paycheck Protection Program, hospitals, and testing.
A lot of money for all of them, especially for our workers and our small businesses.
My administration has worked aggressively with Congress to negotiate this critical $482 billion funding package.
We reached a deal that includes $382 billion in crucial small business support to keep workers on the payroll, $75 billion to aid hospitals, which really need the aid.
And very badly.
Very proud of that.
And $25 billion to support coronavirus testing efforts.
This is the most tired I think I've seen him.
I urge the House to pass the bill, and they're going to be voting on it, I imagine, very soon.
Okay, the only thing I'll say, is there a blur tool on his hair?
I think, Paul, we're here, so he's a very busy man, as you know.
Maybe.
It's an active blur tool.
It's getting a little more angular, I think.
Running back, so I thought we'd do, we'll talk about that now, and we'll take a couple of questions on that, and then he can go and start phase four.
Probably they'll be voting tomorrow in the house, but shortly, shortly.
And I think we have tremendous support.
That's one, two, three, four.
So Steve, please come up, say a few words.
Thank you, Mr. President, and thank you for all your work with us to get this passed.
I'd especially like to thank Mitch McConnell and Chuck Schumer and the entire Senate for passing this.
I'd also like to thank Kevin McCarthy and Nancy Pelosi for working with us around the clock as well, and our Chief of Staff, Mark Meadows, who was also very instrumental in this.
Let me just comment.
We've had tremendous support for the PPP.
This gives us another $310 billion for the PPP.
We look forward to the House passing this tomorrow and being up and running quickly after that.
This also gives us $50 billion for disaster loans, EIDL loans that will allow the SBA to make $300 billion of disaster loans, all for small businesses.
Uh, also allows us, as the President said, more money to hospitals and an unprecedented amount of money for testing.
Now, is this more money for hospitals because they're overcapacity or because they have to lay off workers and furlough them because they ranked up in the House?
And because they've cut off all elective procedures, which is where they make their money.
Now, let me make just one more comment on the program.
We have over a million companies that have received this with less than 10 workers.
So there is very broad participation in really small business.
I will comment there have been some big businesses that have taken these loans.
I was pleased to see that Shake Shack returned the money.
We will be putting out some FAQs.
There is a certification that people are making and I ask people just make sure the intent of this was for business that needed the money.
We'll put out an FAQ.
But again, the intent of this money was not for big public companies that have access to capital.
So, Mr. Secretary, are you going to request that those other companies — obviously, Shake Shack was not alone in being a big company that got money in this.
Are you going to be asking — I'm going to request.
You're going to ask them to return that money.
I'm President, aren't I?
I'm doing it.
And they shouldn't be taking it.
So, Harvard's going to.
Good.
You have a number of — I'm not going to mention any other names, but when I saw Harvard, They have one of the largest endowments anywhere in the country, maybe in the world, I guess, and they're going to pay back that money.
And I just want to clarify, because certain people on the PPP may have not been clear in understanding the certification.
So we will give people the benefit of the doubt.
We're going to put an FAQ out, explain the certification.
If you pay back the loan right away, you won't have liability to the SBA and to Treasury.
But there are severe consequences.
For people who don't attest properly to this certification.
And again, we want to make sure this money is available to small businesses that need it.
People who have invested their entire life savings.
We appreciate what's going on and they're hiring people back.
How are you going to ensure that those small businesses, those small restaurants, cafes, bars, who did not get the money last time around are going to get it this time?
Well, as I said, there are a million of these companies that did get it that are very small.
We're working with the banks.
We're extremely pleased.
Thank you, Mr. Secretary.
Do you know, estimate, how long this is going to take?
That other pot of money obviously went quickly.
and less, 60% by 20 billion and less, and the big banks also.
We want everybody to participate.
There's now a lot of money back in the program, and we look forward to all these small businesses
getting access to funds.
Brett, it's great to see you here.
Thank you, Mr. Secretary.
Do you know, estimate how long this is going to take?
That other pot of money obviously went quickly.
Do you assume this is going to go quickly as well?
Well, let me just say, I mean, you know, kind of we're pleased with the success of this
program and how quickly this got up operationally.
We've put out more money in the SBA loans than in the last 10 years of SBA.
So I want to thank all the banks that have worked really hard.
Secretary Gary Shanley.
Brett Baer, glad to see you here.
You make me weak in the knees.
We've already impacted about 30 million workers.
There'll be a lot more, so we look forward to this having a big impact on the economy.
We worked with the White House on this.
The Press The President said he would book into the issue of felons, those with criminal
convictions, getting access to some of these programs.
I'm wondering if you have an update on that.
Secretary Mnuchin Sure.
So we worked with the White House on this.
There were actually much more onerous restrictions in the SBA program.
There were people who had misdemeanors that weren't allowed to access the program.
It was much longer than five years.
And we very much, because of the criminal reform legislation that was passed and the
work that's been done in the White House by Jared and others. We specifically
designed the program.
You can talk when Donald Trump's not talking so much.
I love that, well, let me know if it'll bother you, but I love that he said, you know, people with misdemeanors, where he was talking about sort of like a statute, I think, I don't know if it's a statute of limitations, but in people applying here, how he's saying, of course, criminals shouldn't apply or shouldn't be eligible, and Joaquin Phoenix wants them all let loose.
Right.
Let them all out.
I know we all understand the circumstances and why businesses need this, but how many more phases can we afford to have, or can businesses expect to have?
Do you see a Phase 5, a Phase 6, a Phase 7?
What's your thinking on this?
Well, first of all, I very much appreciate the President's support for Phase 4.
He put out a tweet.
You hear that?
He did a smile.
I did do that.
That was me.
The President's been talking about infrastructure since the campaign.
Roads, bridges, broadband, especially broadband now to rural America is very important.
We've talked about incentives for restaurants, sports, entertainment, because these businesses
have been impacted.
The President has talked multiple times about a payroll tax cut.
And we've also, we're talking about in the case of states, the states we've heard from
the governors and the fiscal issues of the states.
If we have phase four, we'll most likely be, what we'll be, basically what we're seeing with the reopening of the economy and the natural money we're putting in.
but don't make as much money.
Right, yeah, exactly.
What else do they fill their coffers with?
Bodies of small children?
Oh, wow.
No, I'm sorry, that's Whitmer.
That's Whitmer's Foot Locker.
Whitmer's Foot Locker was the answer, folks.
Especially later this summer.
Just real quick to follow up on the PPP program.
Is this the last tranche of money you think you're going to need for small businesses?
We would expect this is the last tranche, but obviously we can always reconsider that.
I named it that.
I did it.
And I'm really glad that this isn't just going to the big banks.
I am glad that this is going to small businesses.
But I do think if you look now at the numbers that we see for this virus, it's not a good source of spending.
No, we need it now because of all the measures that have been taken, but it didn't need to go this far.
I know it's an unpopular opinion, so sue me.
I think we should have taken precautions.
I think we should be safe.
I don't think we should need, uh, effectively... What are we at now?
Are we talking about a trillion?
Close to a trillion?
I think he said 600 billion in, uh, loans.
Just total?
Yeah.
No, total.
I'm saying if you add up both... Oh.
No, no.
Both... Uh, we can bring that up.
You guys can bring it up as an overlay.
The total... I don't have the number in front of me.
It's over 600... Well, either way, the deficit is sore.
It's between 600 billion and a trillion.
Yeah.
Yeah, either way, the deficit is going wild.
Yeah.
More evidence you should just open up the economy.
Let's let things go back to normal to some degree.
We had no obligation to do this. We put up, you can go to treasury.gov, full transparency on the money that had been
sent out on the PPP across states, showing all the big lenders, how it was distributed and distributed.
No one lender did more than 4%.
Showed the businesses.
So again, the President and I very much believe in full transparency.
We're spending a lot of money, and we want to make sure that it's done effectively and
fairly.
Sir, Secretary, thank you.
You started by thanking the leaders in the House and the Senate.
Can you tell us more about how easy or hard it was to deal with what's said?
I want you guys to actually see this stream because I know you can't access it on mainstream
news.
Well, we've been working around the clock.
I think there's been very good bipartisan support to get this done.
The Congress is coming together, understanding the importance of this.
And we've been working around the clock for days.
So this is important legislation.
It was a lot.
We spoke to a lot of people.
Mark Meadows has been fantastic, as I said.
It's great to have him here in the White House.
I couldn't have done this without him working on this with me and the President and Vice President.
Absolutely.
We couldn't have done this today without unanimous consent and the Democrats being on board, and we look forward to this being passed on a bipartisan basis tomorrow.
This is a real example of the country coming together to fight this virus.
What is your best understanding of what Mitch McConnell wants from an infrastructure package?
Again, I think we're not at the point of designing that like every other bill.
Senators on both sides on a bipartisan basis.
I can tell you a lot of support, particularly for things like this, and especially what's going on today.
But the President has talked about, you know, I was on the campaign with the President.
We've been talking about bridges and tunnels and rebuilding this country for years.
So the President wants to make a big investment in this.
Mr. Secretary, what will we see in the $17 billion portion of CARES reserved for companies deemed critical for national security?
And also, will oil companies fit into that at all, per the President's tweet?
Small, yes.
So, we're in the process of putting out guidance.
By the way, oil was starting long before corona and is not directly related to corona.
It was obviously exacerbated by it.
The problem with oil is people don't really understand that with food, which I think is criminal, by the way, they dump food.
So that way, presidents don't go into a net negative effect with which you have your oil.
You have to pay people to dispose of oil.
So not only is oil worth nothing, but then it's actually a net cost because you have
to dispose of it properly.
Well, it's only May futures, right?
So June and July are much higher.
They're not negative.
And it's not just West Texas Intermediate.
There's Prince McCrudden as well.
Right.
And we look forward to both looking at what existing capabilities we have, and that will be something we may
need to go back to Congress and get additional funding for.
Similar to the airplane or airline bailout at all?
Completely different situation.
I mean, what you have with the airlines is, you know, we had a very, very good airline industry because of the virus.
As long as we end up with no Spirit airline, I'm fine.
They just need more money.
The oil business, partially because of the virus, but partially also because of too much supply.
But, you know, the president has determined we want to maintain our energy independence, and the president has asked me to look at all of our options, and we're doing that.
Obviously, it's a pretty extraordinary situation when you saw the front... No, it's true.
Like, the UFC used to do that.
When they started, they put people on Spirit.
They would have, like, three layers.
You don't need to tell me that.
Not anymore.
Any thoughts on whether that money should be proportionate to the rate of infection in states so that harder-hit states- Wait, wait, wait.
Interesting, but way too early to consider that.
Whatever we do, we do on a bipartisan basis.
The President has listened to the governors.
I've had the opportunity on multiple video conference calls with the President and the Vice President.
We're reaching out to a lot of people.
There's a lot of states that have been impacted, but way too early to figure out that level of design.
I gotta be the big one.
If a large company applies for one of these loans and manipulates or works the system or works the loopholes to get it, what are some of the consequences if a large company tries to get one of these PPP loans?
What can you do?
She gets a lot of questions.
Again, we're going to put up very clear guidance.
It's going to be really hard to catch people doing that.
Very hard.
What the certification is, what it means if you're a big company.
Again, there is a provision for, you know, where there are multiple affiliates that people can access this, but the intent was not for companies that have access to plenty of liquidity and other sources.
And again, to the extent these companies didn't understand this and they repay the loans, that will be potentially other consequences.
Can you talk about what those consequences could be?
Again, you can look at the certifications.
They're quite significant.
Do you have an estimate of how many jobs have been saved with all the money that's gone out of the PPP so far?
Billions.
Well, I can tell you the PPP so far is over 30 million jobs.
And again, that doesn't account for other money that we've sent out.
And again, we're very pleased.
The direct deposits have gone out.
We've started sending out checks.
Something has pissed President Trump off.
Did you see that?
He's like, why would you do that?
Why would you ask that?
Why would you make that face?
So we can get money out quickly to people.
So everything that the President has had us working on You're telling me this isn't Gary Chandler?
That was a nice question, actually.
economy while we're dealing with this difficult time.
We need to confirm it or deny it.
In determining what small business qualify, a pimp was forced to give it back to the Fed
after backhanding a prostitute.
Ah.
That was a nice question, actually.
It's a good question, too.
Oh, he respected the question.
So the noble fight against the invisible enemy has inflicted a steep toll on the American workforce.
As we all know, millions of Americans sacrifice their jobs in order to battle the virus and save the lives of our fellow citizens.
We have a solemn duty to ensure these unemployed Americans regain their jobs and their livelihoods.
Therefore, in order to protect American workers, I will be issuing a temporary suspension of immigration into the United States.
You heard about that last night?
They shouldn't.
They shouldn't be a denigrating role.
But we shouldn't exalt them until they volunteer as tribute to save the economy.
This was inflicted upon them by the American government.
Let's be clear about that.
Immigrant!
Drink!
Ah, really?
That was a word?
laid off by the virus to be replaced with new immigrant labor flown in from abroad.
Ah, really?
That was a word?
We must first take care of the American worker.
Take care of the American person.
I spilled beer and it went in my chest hole.
This pause will be in effect for 60 days.
After which the need for any extension or modification will be evaluated by myself and a group of people based on economic conditions at the time.
This order will only apply to individuals seeking a permanent residency.
In other words, those receiving green cards Big factor.
We'll not apply to those entering on a temporary basis.
As we move forward, we'll examine what additional immigration-related measures should be put in place.
This is why they don't hear the press briefings.
He's stopping all immigrants.
First off, he's not.
And he also just said, no, no, it's only about people who are trying to reside permanently, trying to relocate permanently.
So it's better for them to talk about this than it is to let him actually explain it.
Well, either way, CNN is losing their audience.
If they play them, if they don't play them, they're going down.
Depending on the time we're talking about, we'll protect the solvency of our health care
system and provide relief to jobless Americans.
Today, Vice President Pence visited the hardworking men and women of General Electric Healthcare
in Madison, Wisconsin.
We're working three shifts a day to quadruple their production of ventilators.
We're way ahead of schedule on ventilators, as you know.
That's why it's never brought up by the media.
They don't like to bring things up when we're on the wall.
He owned all of them on that one.
GE is also working with Ford to make 50,000 ventilators in the next 100 days, more than
our entire country typically produces in a very long period of time.
Doing that in a matter of a few weeks and a few days.
Earlier today I had a very productive meeting with Governor Cuomo, as you probably saw, to discuss his statewide testing strategy and how we can work together to help expand it with the goal of doubling testing in the next few weeks.
Testing, drink.
That was a work statement.
We'll be continuing to control the testing of their citizens.
Testing, drink, work.
We'll also manage their state and local laboratories.
They have a lot of great laboratories there.
More than anybody would ever have known, frankly.
The federal government will work along with the state.
We thought their laboratories sucked.
Who knew?
I knew about none of them.
And now I know about all of them.
I knew about some of them.
And frankly, I thought they were crap.
I stand not corrected, but there's new information.
I stand better informed.
I stand before you smarter today than you.
I can say very honestly with New York State and New York City, they've been terrific to work with.
The New York metropolitan area has been the epicenter of the outbreak here in America, and the federal government has spared no expense or resource to get New Yorkers the care they need and the care they deserve.
We've sent over 5 million masks.
We had 5 million masks, and now that number, as of about two days from now, will be more than doubled.
We made one big mask to go over the whole city.
It's more of a charm for the whole city.
Much more parachutes.
Covered the whole city.
and blah blah blah a great deal of ventilators
which people thought would be impossible but I want to thank
thousands of hospital beds And the US House of Comfort was sent, as you know, to New York.
And it was originally for more of a normal medical purpose.
See, this is good news, by the way.
You see, Cuomo, most of the time when he's been talking, he's been praising Donald Trump.
He's been praising the cooperative relationship that we have with New York.
That's why they don't run the press briefing.
That's why we're doing this.
That we know so well.
Unfortunately that we know so well.
I said from the beginning that no American who needs a ventilator would be denied a ventilator, and we have kept that promise all over the United States.
Think of that.
Other countries are desperate for ventilators.
That is accurate, by the way, with ventilators.
That's a big one.
Because remember, if you go back to two weeks, they were saying people won't have ventilators, they'll be dying.
And they were afraid to bring the comfort back to its base in Virginia so that we can have it for other locations, and he said we would be able to do that.
Javits Center has been A great help to them.
But we'll be bringing the ship back at the earliest time, and we'll get it ready for its next mission, which will, I'm sure, be a very important one also.
But it was an honor.
They reconverted it after it got there into handling an event that they were not expecting to be handling.
The FDA has now authorized more than Fifty diagnostic tests, including, as of late last night, the first test that a patient can take home.
You can take it at home, and it's highly accurate.
LabCorp intends to make the home collection kits available to consumers in most states with a doctor's order in the coming weeks.
We also have four different antibody tests already authorized.
Tests will help identify individuals who can donate convalescent plasma, thus providing potentially life-saving antibodies to American patients.
It's a new element.
It is.
Dr. Hahn will be providing you with an update on these developments in a few moments.
He's done a great job at the FDA.
We continue to gain ground in the war against the unseen enemy.
I see light at the end of the tunnel.
I actually see a lot of light at the end of the tunnel.
That's his ad-lib.
Just a little.
I see we're on the way.
Not just a little.
Starting the process.
We're starting a very, very powerful and important process.
You could say I have been blinded by the light.
People are getting very anxious.
They want to get going.
Rolled up.
They want to get back to their jobs.
Like a deuce, but I would never touch it.
They want to make money.
They want to take care of their families.
So the light is getting brighter and brighter every day.
And with that, if I could, I'll ask Dr. Birx to come up and then Dr. Hahn.
Thank you very much.
Was that us?
Thank you, Mr. President.
So looking at all of the information across the United States, we do see improvement across all the large metros.
I know you know that.
We've been talking about the New York metro area, New York City, Rhode Island, Connecticut, Long Island.
She puts herself together very well.
It's the scarf.
Scarf's pulled together.
She's pretty.
I don't know, there's something about her that I find attractive.
The Detroit metro is doing quite well with significant declines now.
New Orleans is nearly back to their baseline of where they started for new infections.
We also are seeing improvements in Chicago and Boston and that has been a great concern for us.
And that's really tough to do.
I can't include anything.
She kind of just leans into the mic.
Excuse me, please.
Excuse me.
And Houston, Atlanta, Nashville, Baltimore, Indianapolis, and St. Louis also appear to
be flattening.
The D.C. metro area, we don't see a decline yet, so hopefully all of you are still social
distancing and doing everything that you can.
I wanted to remind everybody of two points.
When we brought up and the President put out the guidelines for opening up America again,
it was very clear to use data and to really work together to mitigate against any resurgence.
And also, critically, to protect the vulnerable.
And what we're seeing across rural America and some of the smaller population states is we're still seeing outbreaks in long-term care facilities.
And we asked everyone in Phase 1 to make sure that they continued their social distancing in public to ensure that the vulnerable with comorbidities and other conditions and among the elderly were staying at home.
That's true.
That's true.
actually it's one of the highest STD infection rates.
That's true.
But as individual Americans, as we begin to open up, we also made it very clear that individual Americans
should be doing all of their hygiene and sanitizing, social distancing, washing hands, not touching their face.
It's true that they're not bringing the virus home to vulnerable individuals within the household.
And remember, those were to be the teams of all three phases.
No.
I really want to call people's attention again to the guidelines.
We are continuing to see outbreaks in nursing homes and in confined spaces.
And I think as Americans, we want to stop that.
And we have the ability to do that by really paying attention to the guidelines that were
to be in all three phases.
And so I'm calling on the states again to note that an informed community and knowledgeable
community is a critical issue.
Not very often.
You hear he just wants to open the doors wide, just wide open right now to the economy.
As if he has no plan.
Yeah, as if there's no plan.
That's why they don't air these briefings.
That's why we have to.
I don't want to be doing this.
I mean, we love you, but we don't want to be doing this.
Why would you say that?
We love them.
I'm watching.
Oh, we love him, okay.
No, the viewers!
Oh, yes, the viewers.
I thought you meant you loved me.
in our city, more vulnerable areas, among indigenous populations, and of course in our
long-term care facilities and prisons.
We really want to support state and local governments to move forward on these critical
monitoring to protect individuals that may be in the most critically vulnerable states.
We will continue to see mortality and deaths among our American citizens, particularly in the cities as they begin to move past peak because deaths will lag.
And so we really need to continue to unite and really, really, really support our health care providers who are
Is it just me or did he just check her out?
still on the front lines.
Did he like go, huh?
A little up down, yeah.
Lean back in.
I have not seen the relief that we've been able to provide in Canada because of the delay in hospitalizations and
deaths.
So, to our health care providers, to our respiratory therapists, and to everyone else, thank you for everything you're doing to protect Americans.
Dr. Burks is going to come up here with her scarf talking about social distancing.
Boring!
Awww!
Thank you Mr. President and I just want to echo what Dr.
Burks said.
He just checked out Dr. Birx again!
I'd much rather look at her than Skeletor.
Just the wonderful work that they do every day.
So President Trump asked the FDA to remove all unnecessary barriers that were in place to help with the development of both diagnostics and therapeutics, and we have done that.
If they're unnecessary, why were they there in the first place?
Oh, because HuffPo might write an article.
Got it.
Please talk about the U.S.C.
which as you know are antibody tests, which detect in the blood the natural immunity
that someone might develop in response to an infection.
They're saying it's COVID-19.
These aren't diagnostic tests, but these are tests that actually detect the antibody.
So an indication that one has had the infection And I think it's important for everyone to understand that the timing of the response of the antibody to the infection isn't completely known, but we know that it takes some time to actually develop that, and there's two types of antibody responses that can be detected.
And the antibody tests are just one piece of the larger response that you've heard in the America Returning to Work
plan that the President has, with the test force has developed. And this pandemic is
truly unprecedented in nature, and you'll see reports around the world of different antibody tests that have been
used.
And I think that's a reflection of the fact that we're just learning and beginning to understand what that response
looks like.
And many of these tests have different characteristics that allow to detect at different points in the infection.
I do want to address one issue that we are laser focused on at FDA, and that is in an effort to provide laboratories
and health care providers the early access to tests.
We issued a policy earlier in March that allowed test developers the opportunity to quickly get their tests to
market and address the needs of the nation as posed by the epidemic.
In March, we provided this regulatory flexibility to manufacturers, and here's what we required of them.
The manufacturers had to validate their tests.
We call it self-validation, similar to what many test developers in the world have done.
They had to notify FDA that they had performed that validation.
And then they had to label their products appropriately in the package insert with information about the validation as well as the fact that it's not a diagnostic test, that it's an antibody test.
And the bottom line here is that FDA still expects manufacturers and test developers to validate their antibody tests even under this revised policy.
Now, we've done a couple of things to actually help end-users, to help laboratories, providers, etc., states in terms of their use of these antibody tests.
One is that we're working with CDC and NCI to actually validate some of the more than 90 manufacturers who notified us that they brought their test to market to do an independent validation.
I am pro-body.
Not of Ms.
Burke.
Check the body.
Tonight's comment.
She's a doctor, Ms.
And we will provide that information to you.
And we will provide that information to you.
Check the body.
Check the body.
It's nice, folks.
It's nice.
It's nice, folks.
It's a nice comment.
She's a doctor, Mr. Kruger.
And we've authorized four applications for antibody tests.
Open heart surgery.
And we've authorized four applications for antibody tests.
as we speak.
So it's not okay for someone to say that a test has been authorized or approved by FDA when it hasn't.
And we are pursuing them both by direct contact with the manufacturers but also at the border.
And so we have increased these interdiction efforts and we will continue to outreach and do that with the manufacturers.
Are you guys going to create crappy antibody tests and then try and flee?
Yeah, pretty much.
We will meet you at the border.
That's a good gag.
Like someone who hopped over from Amway?
Antibody tests, quick, let's hightail it to Tijuana!
No, not at my watch.
Developers, more than 90 manufacturers, how many of these tests actually work?
So as I mentioned, the 90 that have come forward and said they're marketing the U.S., they are required by us to have self-validation, and they're required to label that appropriately in their package insert.
They also said that what we're doing is we're working with folks around the country.
They had to fit in a negative question.
How do you know it worked?
Well, he just gave you the whole process.
Were you paying attention?
I'm sorry, but I wasn't listening.
Because here's what happens.
Right now they want a quicker response so they can blame Donald Trump.
And then if the tests aren't 100% foolproof, they'll blame him for deregulation.
Rushing it out.
Because Donald Trump was inventing the test with his test tube.
I have a beaker and a bunch of burner.
That spinny tube one.
I don't know what it's called, but it's spinny.
A flask of Erlenmeyer.
You may have seen reports in the press of labs around the country that have done that.
We've actually reached out to them, many academics, and we will be including that information in the information that we generate as well to provide to the American people.
There was a study out of the TA today on hydroxychloroquine that found a higher mortality rate compared to those who got standard of care.
I know this is a large scale clinical trial, but since this drug is out there and people are using it, can you give some takeaways from that study?
Did that change your thinking at all on hydroxychloroquine?
So this study is a small retrospective study at the VA, and similar to the data we talked about before with the French study, this is something that a doctor would need to consider as part of a decision in writing prescription for hydroxychloroquine.
And as I've mentioned from this podium and in other venues before, what FDA is going to require is data from clinical trials, randomized clinical trials, Hydroxychloroquine, placebo, to actually make a definitive decision around safety and efficacy.
But the preliminary data are helpful to providers.
And doctors, I want to ask them to incorporate the data as we have it come forward.
And it's not definitive data.
It doesn't help us make a decision from a regulatory point of view.
But doctors should incorporate that in the decision making they make on a one-on-one basis.
It's just the timeline on the clinical trials and when we will be getting a readout of that data.
So, the good news is we have over 30 clinical trials.
Now, the settings are very different.
They're in the outpatient setting.
They're in the inpatient setting.
And also, I think very importantly, in what we call the post-exposure prophylaxis, meaning if
you're a healthcare worker or a frontline provider and you've been exposed to the virus, take
the drug for a period of time to see if you can prevent the development of illness related to the virus.
So, all those trials are in progress and will probably be early summer before we get a readout.
The President And, Mr. President, if I can pick up on that, all of these tests, I want to say, are
in addition to the tests that we already have.
And we have tested more people than anybody anywhere in the world, by far, by very far.
The Press President Mr. President, if I can?
Well, I think you wanted to follow up on the hydroxychloroquine.
The Press The hydroxychloroquine.
I'm wondering if you're concerned this VA study showed that actually more people died that used the drug
than they didn't.
Again, if you're not controlling people with heart conditions, which we know is an issue with hydroxychloroquine,
if you're just saying they're in really, really bad shape, let's give it to them.
That's why it's different from some of the 30 other trials and studies.
And perhaps this one's not a good report, but we'll be looking at it. We'll have a comment on it.
A panel of experts at the NIH is actually now recommending against the use of hydroxychloroquine
in combination with Z-Pak, which is something you've been recommending.
I'm always willing to take a look.
Fred?
That's a panel.
What about all the other ones?
The executive order will be – it's being written now as we speak, probably tomorrow sometime.
So will it have exemptions in there?
It will have certain exemptions because you're going to need certain exemptions, but we'll be notifying you tomorrow.
We'll sign it most likely.
Oh wait, drink by the way, that was on the immigration.
By the way, Johnny boy, I need a fill up.
It's something we have to have in this country.
We have to have it.
So for the people who said it doesn't track with opening up the country.
Well, I think it really does.
I think it's very strong, obviously, and it's countrywide as opposed to specifically, like, China or... There it is.
He even said it like that.
I love it.
Garcon!
We're out of beer!
You need to hit the dink.
North Korea, what can you tell us about the status of Kim Jong-un?
He's gonna die.
That makes me a little nervous though if he dies because of the relationship with China and what we sort of need as far as international relations to mitigate the damage and people to... This is why the executive order is also probably pretty important because you're gonna be looking at a bunch of people trying to flee North Korea at this point.
The reports say, that the news is saying, there'll be a...
That's a very serious condition, as you know.
But I wish him well.
He needs one too.
We've had a good relationship.
I've said it, and I've said it many times.
If somebody else were in this position, we would have been right now at war with North
Korea.
And we're not at war, and we're nowhere close to war with North Korea.
So I just have to say to Kim Jong-un, I wish him very good luck.
I know, that's why I was trying to help him.
Good luck.
I mean, they came out with very, very serious medical reports.
Nobody's confirmed that.
It was CNN that came out.
So when CNN comes out with a report, I don't place too much credence in it.
We have an agreement and we have an understanding in testing.
They have labs, tremendous labs as you know in New York, especially in the Manhattan area, but all over the state.
And great, great medical schools and Because she'll wear it by you.
Her childhood.
I must have done.
a very good understanding. We're going to do very significant testing. You know, not
everybody wants to do such significant testing. Testing is good in some cases, and in some
cases it's not. You have governors that don't want to go and spell out any testing because
they don't get to do it in a different manner. Because somewhere in my youth or childhood,
I must have done... Do you know this?
Good.
Good.
Holy shit, it's a penguin.
That's far more money than in my opinion.
We have $25 billion.
Holy shit, it's a penguin.
That's a tremendous amount.
That's far more money than, in my opinion.
Sorry, I know I said that.
And again, already we're testing more by far than any country.
I think I read yesterday a report that we've done more than everybody else,
every other country combined.
And I think our people should be getting a lot of credit for that.
We've done a lot more than everybody else combined, and you never hear that in the news.
Now, in the spirit of fairness, we don't have the most testing per capita.
But the media uses different metrics.
They bring up the testing per capita, but then they don't bring up the death rate per capita.
I think the per capita number matters, and we are certainly significantly higher up on the testing per capita.
We're going to be reporting on that later on.
It might be tonight or tomorrow.
We'll give you an exact report.
You can send people who may be worried about the ability to bring immediate family members in.
No, I think it's been covered pretty accurately in this case.
I think most people know what it is and some people will be able to get in.
We have to do that.
By the way, I want to be really clear that chloroquine study, this is from the AP, is a study of 65-year-old or older veterans with an average of three underlying conditions.
Three.
An average of three underlying conditions.
Not the median.
Not the mean.
This guy again.
The average.
I don't think so.
They're not supposed to be here.
You're saying they're here illegally?
Is that what you're saying?
Well, for example, if an immigrant is here for a court order, right?
Are they at risk of deportation?
Well, a court order.
Then you have to go to court.
So then the judge would make a determination as to whether or not they're going to be staying.
But if they have a court order, They won't have to leave until they go through that process.
So we'll see what happens.
But with the court, and there are some with court orders, that means they have a trial coming up.
Please.
So obviously, on the immigration executive order, you've raised concern for a long time, even in good economic times about immigrants taking Americans jobs.
So under what conditions would you consider lifting this halt on immigration?
Yeah.
Is this sort of an opportunity to address what you've seen as a problem for a long time?
Well, I think, look, right now, obviously, there's never been.
We had the greatest economy in the world, and then one day we had to shut it down.
They said, you have to shut it down.
We did the right thing, because I think we would have had a million, or maybe even two million, or maybe more than that death.
So we did the right thing.
I don't think so, but either.
Certainly, this would pertain.
I mean, when you look at it, right now, the last thing we want to do is take American workers' jobs.
It's one thing when we were essentially, they used to call it full employment, and it's another thing right now.
Right now, we have people that have lost their jobs, and we hope they're going to come back and come back fast.
I will say that's actually a really good way to put it, full employment, because there's record levels of employment and job participation in America.
That's why they don't run these press briefings.
Well, we'll have to see.
I mean, I hope we're in that position to have that debate.
Right now, we're not in that position.
Right now, we closed down the largest economy, the greatest economy in the history of the world.
It's the most successful economy when you look at the time.
I mean, we're breaking records virtually every week, sometimes every day.
And the stock market is still not doing badly, considering what this country has been through,
which really tells you how strong it was in the first place.
But, no, I hope we're going to be able to have that discussion.
I hope we're in a position.
That's like a good discussion to have.
But that will be a little bit later.
Brett.
The Press.
The Press.
I have a question for Dr. Birx about the CDC director said in an interview that perhaps
this second wave of coronavirus in the fall could be worse because it is timed with the
seasonal flu.
I'm just wondering if you could talk about that.
And talk about that in context as you're opening up the country.
Dr. Birx.
Dr. Birx.
The President.
So we were very clear in the guidelines that we believe we can monitor, again,
monitor communities at the community level by using the influenza-like illness.
And the syndromic respiratory and gastrointestinal components of this.
Oh, good.
This particular virus.
I was hoping we would use those components.
Obviously when we have flu, we're going to, and we're working on an algorithm that you test for flu.
Just completely gone!
Making sure that we are building the testing capacity to be able to do that, because I think it's very important that you're going to be able, On the surface, a patient when they come in with early flu and early COVID can look very close to a deadly case.
So we need to have testing in place to be able to separate and ensure those patients receive the best treatment.
We're also hoping by that time that we have additional treatment options for people with COVID-19, so that there will be additional treatment available in the fall.
We're less prepared for that time, thinking we'll come back together.
Gerald, that's not scary.
No, I don't know if that's true.
That's absolutely true.
That's what happened in 1918 in Volenda.
Listen, I'm reading a book right now.
I feel like I'm smart.
It's the first book.
Sounds weird, yeah.
Notre Dame didn't make me read one.
No pictures at all.
Just two pictures.
Per page.
A lot of pop-ups, though.
Well, it changes.
And that's why he's not stopping the ventilator works.
It's very important that we have a completely refreshed and a comprehensive stockpile going into the fall.
And I think that's why we continue to be in a situation that's sort of mutating
and that's sort of the down time that we see is that there will be other opportunities for us.
So I'm gonna put this out full show.
Anyone who speaks French out there, let us know what that means.
If you're in the Blaze chat, you'll get a free thing.
You just couldn't come back.
I feel worse in the fall.
I don't know if it will be worse.
I think this has been pretty bad.
When you see what has happened in New York, that was very bad.
I believe that we'll have early warning signals, both from our surveillance that we've been talking about on the vulnerable populations.
We're going to continue that surveillance from now all the way through the fall to be
able to give us that early warning signal.
I think what we've learned is how good Americans are about immediately reverting to all of
those issues that they need to do in order to ensure that they're protected and their
families.
Q And Mr. President, what do you say to the concerns like Georgia is opening up barber
shops and bowling alleys and the like?
And you saw Lindsey Graham is saying he's concerned that Georgia may be going too far,
too fast and could affect people in South Carolina.
Obviously, people travel back and forth between states.
How do you protect the people of South Carolina, for example, from a potentially bad decision by a governor in Georgia?
So he's a very capable man.
He knows what he's doing.
He's done a very good job as governor, Georgia.
And by the way, and South Carolina.
Governor McMaster also.
So you have two very capable people.
We're going to find out.
And in fact, I'm scheduled to speak to the governor of Georgia in a little while.
But we'll find out.
With Graham's concern that what happens in Georgia could affect South Carolina.
Well, everybody.
I have a concern about what happens everywhere.
I mean, we've got those concerns.
It's not just Georgia.
Things are happening.
I'm concerned about it.
We have 49 other states.
And I think about them also.
When you look at what's happening, when you look at the numbers coming down, a lot of states are in really great shape.
You're going to see a lot of openings.
But I'll be speaking to the governor of Georgia in a little while.
Mr. President, should the American people need to be prepared for going back to social distancing, even if things relax over the summer, but come the fall, if the virus comes back in coincidence?
Well, I could see them, and I'll speak for the doctor if you'd like either of you to say, but I would say that you keep away until this thing is gone.
It's going to be gone at some point.
It's going to be gone, gone.
I hope that the economy is going to be great by that time, but we'll see.
Donald Trump said it would miraculously be gone.
Your executive order is the last 60 days.
No executive order.
It'll be gone.
Well, it'll be here first.
This will be far from gone gone.
I'm going to go crawl back into my Casper and eat a pint of Ben & Jerry's.
I hope that the economy is going to be great by that time, but we'll see.
But right now, in light of the fact that Americans are out of jobs, I can't be taken in.
Could you roll it for another 60 days?
Well, I could, or I could roll it for 30 days, or I could roll it for much more than 60 days.
We'll have to take a look at the time, but we'll be looking at 60 days, and we'll see what it is.
Yeah, Mr. President.
Mr. President.
On your immigration order.
On your immigration order.
Drink.
Immigration.
So you go.
Why don't you go and then you.
Okay, on my immigration order.
There is reporting that you may actually sign a second order to even limit more of those exemptions that you were just talking about.
Can you confirm that you are considering?
It could happen if I want, but I won't be doing it tomorrow.
I'll be signing the primary order, and then we have a secondary order that if I want to do that, we'll make that determination.
We can do that.
Yeah, we can do that at a little bit different time if we want.
But that is under consideration at this time, a second order?
Yeah, sure.
Secondary orders, yeah.
Thank you, Mr. President.
I have two questions.
This is not a hostile briefing room.
There will be some highlights that will be taken where he's gotten testy, and that's what the media runs for.
That's why they don't want you to watch these.
My first question is about your immigration order.
You campaigned on reducing legal immigration.
I remember your speech in Phoenix in 2016 on reducing legal immigration.
I campaigned for legal and illegal, but no, I've always said you have to come into the country legally.
Drink.
That's three drinks.
What I campaigned on was people just flooding our border and stopping.
And by the way, speaking of that, we have 170 miles, almost 170 miles of very powerful border wall up.
And it's moving rapidly, very quickly.
And it's having a tremendous impact.
Best wall in history.
And it's making our job a lot easier.
Plus, Mexico has 27,000 soldiers right now on our southern border that we share with them.
And Mexico's been terrific.
They've really helped.
You also campaigned on reducing legal immigration, and I'm wondering if some critics are saying that you are using the virus now in this crisis to follow through on that promise to reduce legal immigration.
No, no.
Well, I want people that are in this country, I want our citizens to get jobs.
I don't want them to have competition.
We have a very unusual situation where something came in that nobody has seen for many, many Decades.
Probably 1917 would be the closest analogy, if you look at it, when you look at the contagion, the kind of contagion we're talking about.
So, no, I'm not, I'm not doing that at all.
I want, I want the American worker and the American, our American citizens to be able to get jobs.
I don't want them to compete right now.
There's a big difference when we have a full economy and frankly where Some of the companies, we have many companies moving in where they need actually, they need workers.
That's a big difference between that and where all of a sudden a lot of people lose jobs.
As you know, a lot of farmers rely on seasonal migrant workers.
Well, that's not going to be affected.
Migrant stream, yeah.
Farmers will not be, that's an important point.
The farmers will not be affected.
Please just let the drinking game rolls up really quickly.
That's a very important point.
I mean, it's a great point, actually.
I'm glad you brought it up.
You're destroying our border in China.
Immigration was not on the list!
It should have been.
You're on the Stephen list.
I've had to drink great craft beer without needing to.
No.
It's true.
as you remember that, right?
It's on the front of the law.
That's true.
It's easy, you know, it's easy to stop everything cold.
You put your names on them too.
But it is to plan it so that the farmers have the people that have been working on those
farms for many years.
And that's what we're doing.
No, the farmers will not be affected by this at all.
If anything, we're going to make it easier and we're doing a process that will make it
better for those workers to come in to go to the farm where they've been for a long
Now, for a question for reporters out of the room, this is from the Washington Times.
Tom Howell.
Why hasn't the CDC, the federal government's main disease-fighting agency, had a more public-facing role in the pandemic?
It was holding regular media calls early on.
And he's got a camera around his neck.
It's very stereotypical.
Well, I can tell you that the CDC has been terrific.
We've worked with them very closely.
They were very much involved, even in the border decision that I made last night.
The director's doing a good job.
We have always, whether it's Tony or Debra or Steve, we have always a lot of people up and certainly as you've seen, the director's been here a lot, right?
He's been here, he's been sitting here, he's been speaking a lot.
No, no, CDC is very much involved.
everything we've done. What do you think? People want to get back to work. And I've
watched some of the protests, not in great detail, but I've seen that and they're separated.
There's a lot of space in between.
I mean, they're watching, believe it or not.
This is where Donald Trump wins middle-American voters.
They're doing social distancing, if you can believe it.
Instead of demonizing them, instead of belittling them, he says, I understand that these people want to work.
They're very much spread out, so I think that's good.
Yeah, he looks really good.
They want to get back to work.
They got to make a living.
They have to take care of their family.
They don't want to do this.
It's you know, unfortunate, maybe one way or the other.
Both are unfortunate.
Both are unfortunate.
But you have a lot of people out there that are anxious to get back.
Yeah, please.
Certainly seem to be indicating that people are actually more concerned.
More people are concerned about the virus spreading.
And I'm going to make our country bigger and better and stronger.
And we have to get started.
They're both big groups, both of them.
My question is, what good is it for these businesses that would be open if their customers
are right?
At the same time, we have to build back our country.
And I'm going to make our country bigger and better and stronger.
And we have to get started.
There's a big difference, though, because people have really been through a lot.
And they understand what to do now.
Before, nobody had ever heard of a thing like this, wouldn't you say?
I mean, nobody ever heard of a thing like this.
Distancing, social distancing, what does that mean?
Washing your hands every 15 minutes, what does that mean?
I mean... What does that mean?
I don't know what that means!
They've done it, but they've done a good job of it.
But you have people.
You can't break the country.
You have to look into this.
At some point, you have to go back.
This whole hand-washing thing.
I know.
I'm so glad I was wrong in the primaries.
Hopefully, the governors are going to do it, because I want the governors.
And I've always wanted to call it federalism.
You can call it whatever you want.
But the governors, I want them to do it.
If we see them doing something we don't like, we'll stop it very quickly.
But they're doing a good job.
They're being careful.
Some of the governors, frankly, They're in a position where they can do it sooner or they can do it a little bit later, and that's okay.
I thought he was going to go after a governor or two.
Yeah, me too.
Gavin.
They need money.
They need help.
And we can't break our country over this.
We can't do it.
We have to get going.
With that being said, some are going to go soon and some are not.
I might run for governor.
Hair salons.
Nail salons.
That'd be hilarious.
Tattoo parlors.
Dr. Birx, can you weigh in on this?
Because the people of Atlanta want to hear from you as well.
You're not supposed to talk, man!
I know the rules.
...safely have hair salons and nail salons and tattoo parlors where people... He should be forced to ask all his questions.
...to inherently be close together.
I think what I've been trying to communicate over the last several days is it's really important that governors and mayors communicate critical information to their communities and show very clearly the data.
Remember we wanted this data and evidence-based.
The data that they utilize to make decisions and the data that the mayor should use In each of the communities.
Because it will have to be on a community by community opening.
Because there are different communities in different places, even in Georgia.
And so I believe people in Atlanta would understand that if their cases are not going down, that they need to continue to do everything that we said.
Social distancing.
Washing your hands.
Wearing a mask in public.
So, if there's a way that people can social distance and do those things, then they can do those things.
I don't know how, but people are very creative.
So, I'm not going to prejudge, but we have told people very clearly and the President guidelines made it very clear about the expectations of things going on.
Remember phase one also included social distancing.
What is that scarf for?
Creepy Joe Bidner.
Turns into pottery from Ghost.
That's right.
to less than 10.
I mean, we've been very clear in the guidelines, and I think it's up to the governors and mayors
to ensure that they're following the best they can each of those phases to make sure
that both the public is completely protected.
But the governors and mayors also need to communicate very clearly on the data that
was used for decision making and make that transparent and available to their constituents.
The reason that these briefings aren't is because this is entirely data driven and there are, there's a litany of experts who are being involved in these decisions and they want you to think that he's some rogue agent.
Right.
Let's try to get a sense of what you have left in the toolbox as it relates to oil.
You hashed out the deal with OPEC Plus, you've ordered for purchases into the SPR.
I mean, what else can be done?
Well, the biggest thing of the toolbox is to get our country open.
Thank you.
That's by far the biggest thing there is.
It's the only thing you have to do.
If we can open it pretty well, and I think we're going to over a period of time, you
strike these puzzles.
You don't tend to use fuel when staying at home as much as you would otherwise.
It's pretty simple.
Subways, of course, remain open with riders.
Two New York-related questions.
In your meeting with Governor Cuomo, was there talk about providing states like New York with aid in the fourth stimulus package?
Wondering if you have any thoughts on whether that aid should be tied to infection rates, whether states like New York, New Jersey that have been hardest hit should receive more money?
And also, if you have any thoughts on Mayor Bill de Blasio, I'm assuming today that he'd
like to host a ticker tape parade of sorts once this is all over to honor the healthcare
workers in New York.
Or have any thoughts on that?
Frankly, that sounds like a good idea to me.
When it's all over, it sounds like a great idea.
They deserve it.
They're warriors.
They've done an incredible job.
We mentioned briefly the state aid.
We talked about that, Governor Cuomo and myself, and I agree with him on that.
And I think most Republicans agree, too, and Democrats.
That's part of phase four, and I think infrastructure is going to be a big part.
We have to rebuild our country.
I mean, you take a look where we spend, and we go over this all the time, but $8 trillion in the Middle East.
We want to rebuild our country, and that means our bridges, our tunnels.
Even schools.
We're doing something with schools.
We have to do our roadways.
What's happened?
We spend so much money on other countries that don't even... that they don't appreciate it.
That's right.
Okay?
They don't appreciate it.
We're going to spend money now on our country.
And we're going to have... It's going to be our jobs.
And we're going to turn Syria into KELLA's bachelor pageants.
It's going to be our equipment.
It's going to be made.
Much of it is going to be made here.
Hopefully, at some point, all of it's going to be made here, John.
Why are they so obsessed with barbershops?
What about the New York subways being open?
I mean, in between dragging black guys off of public transit to beat them with billy clubs because they didn't wear a mask.
Don't forget the petri dishes.
So the rest of Americans who need haircuts or need supplies or plants or carpet, they go without, but the New York elite, they get to Huddle up in Pringles cans filled with human droplets and farts?
Essential.
They can't go anywhere.
Find me any place in America, any place in America more contaminated than the L train.
any country in the world, we have one of the most successful, if you call mortality rates.
Find me any place in America, any place in America more contaminated than the L-tree.
One person is too many.
I'll wait.
But we've done very well.
Our testing, if you add them all up, we've tested more.
Now, I don't know what Mike Pence said, but I'm sure he could answer that question.
You know what?
You ready?
Again?
We've tested more than every country in the world even put together.
So that's all I can say.
As far as Mike, he'll answer your question when he's here.
We'll be back tomorrow.
I just want to go back to the China deal and the phase one of this China deal.
The fight ban is still in place.
How come you argue that the Chinese are not going to invoke the natural disaster clause and just wait before getting into the agreement?
Well, we're going to see.
Look, there's nobody ever been tougher on China than me.
And that means for 20 years, you go back 20 years.
I've been very tough.
I said China's been ripping us off for 20 years.
I'd go into Michigan.
I'd go into Pennsylvania.
Make speeches unrelated to being a politician.
I'd be invited.
I'd be speaking to people, which I like to do because I love the people.
I love the people of this country.
And I'd make speeches.
I'd say, how did you let this happen with China?
I even asked the leaders of China.
Ah, son of a... How did this ever happen?
Donald Trump, stop!
Where our country loses tens of billions of dollars in yield.
Wade, you're not playing.
And I don't mean just tens.
He's into it.
Take a look.
200 billion, 300 billion, 200 billion, 500 billion dollars in yield.
How did they ever let a thing like this happen?
Now, if you look at this last year, the deficit went way down, and I'm talking about even before.
Now it's much different.
But a lot of things are happening.
Great things are happening.
A little imprecise.
Sucking out very, very hot.
On the same.
On the same.
Objective.
Way different.
Let's go with different.
That's not strong enough.
Way different.
I'm talking way, way different.
Actually, just stop trying to do the bad accent.
I guarantee that they are going to go ahead with this.
But if that happens, we'll do a termination and we'll do what I can do better than anybody.
Hey, Pufferfish, you had your question.
Have U.S.
intelligence analysts told you that they think that the virus escaped from a Chinese research lab?
Well, I can't tell you that.
Have U.S.
intelligence agents told me?
I mean, what kind of a question is that?
What kind of question is that, you fucking idiot?
I'm going on to somebody else.
You.
I tell you what, when you get clearance for the war room, I'll answer your question, okay?
Look, I don't like when Harvard has, I think, a $40 billion endowment to some incredible amount of money that Harvard borrows its money.
Harvard should pay that money back. I want Harvard to pay the money back, okay?
And if they won't do that, then we won't do something else.
They have to pay it back. I don't like it. I don't like it.
This is meant for workers. This isn't meant for one of the richest institutions,
not only far beyond schools, in the world.
They gotta pay it back.
I want them to pay it back.
Now he's getting more testy.
You can see the rhythm change.
I like it.
I like it.
Here we go.
He's like a boxer now.
He's gotten into it.
He's like, all right, all right, come on.
Here we go.
Huh?
Huh?
Whoa!
Bow!
Oh!
Look.
Look at this.
What's happening?
Bow!
Straight down the pipe.
That guy plays classical guitar, by the way.
He's got the extra long pinky nail.
We'd be like, Mr. Trump.
And he travels everywhere with a hammock.
He's good.
Yeah, he does.
I think it's probably 700, 750 people.
So you can't have anything open.
And you say, what are we going to do, have full payroll and have the whole place with, you know,
there's no income coming in.
First of all, everyone's home, and they're supposed to be.
Second of all, Florida, you can't use golf courses.
That one, I'm not sure I agree with.
You know, you have... Oh, so people are going to catch up.
Yeah, they're going to catch him on that.
It's Mar-a-Lago's.
Donald Trump's golf courses.
No, it's because it's the most absurd scenario.
It's like walking in a park.
There's no easier way to... There isn't another sport where you can socially distance like golf.
No, yeah.
Where you can stay hundreds of yards away from another group.
It's like saying we need to close the biathlon tracks.
Well, the closed property is like, you know, you have to close them up and then hopefully when things get better, we'll just open it up.
But you can't have, you know, many hundreds of employees standing around doing nothing.
There's no customer.
You're not allowed to have a customer.
And that's the biggest difference.
So in some places it's very strict.
They're not even allowed.
That's the big difference between the Obama stimulus.
Listen, I'm generally against federal intervention.
And you have to do what you have to do.
But when the federal government intervened by telling people effectively put them on a... And it's too bad, I feel so badly when I see that.
Yeah, exactly.
Don't support their budget.
I think that's a tough policy, but I go by whatever the policy.
That's a safe policy.
It was caused by intervention.
It was caused by intervention.
So it's intervention as a solution.
And I actually kind of accept that there's responsibility accepted by this government that, hey, listen, we screwed.
We did it.
So we're going to try and make up for it.
Well, this is why you don't screw around earlier.
Right.
You don't empty the coffers on something you don't need to for something like this.
And that's to the benefit of the country.
So you can be prepared.
That's not a bad thing.
That's a good thing.
And I'd like to see him be well, and we'll see how he does.
Again, I don't know that the reports are true.
Is he talking about Joe?
Do they have a line of succession as far as you know?
I don't want to ask him that.
I have asked him that, but it's not...
It's not my purpose.
Who's coming right after you.
Lady, you tag.
You know, I hope you don't have your stereo.
I'm so sad.
Not my A-track.
Need to bring back Rodman to comment.
When you die, Kim Jong, I want your box set of Route 66.
Aww, you're killing me, Don!
You're killing me, Don!
Oh, you're killing me, Tom.
You're killing me, Tom.
Edd3's company.
No!
He loves the worst sitcoms.
Both of them.
Three's Company was great.
It was a masterpiece.
Matt, don't take my souvenir summer from me, dog!
I'm already close to dead!
I made it very clear to all of the American people with Opening Up America, the critical criteria, the critical
criteria, there were also...
For context, Dr. Burks could kick the shit out of Kim Jong-un in a face-off.
... conversations with epidemiologists around the world and with CDC, to really...
It's a five syllable word.
... pick things that people could understand...
I'm gonna join this.
I'm glad that I am.
... and use platforms that people have utilitized in the past.
Watching someone not having that much pressure.
But it was built on the premise that it needs to be data-driven.
driven.
And it needs to protect those who are most vulnerable.
And then it went through the phases.
And the very first thing it says in all phases all individuals
need to continue to wash hands, protect the vulnerable, and ensure the safety of others.
But in phase one, it made it clear that social distancing was a priority.
And I think on the White House website, and we ask everyone to do that, and to use that as their
guide line.
Now with all the mail, it's not a priority.
It's a priority.
And I think on the White House website, and we ask everyone to do that, and to use that as their
guide line.
Yeah.
Barks to the.
Transparent and unnoticed.
It really is.
And Jacksonville is dramatically different than Miami.
And I think that was reflected in why Jacksonville had a different set of immigration regulations.
I'm not going to second-judge anyone about their decision-making.
What I'm going to say is we were very clear in what we really believe protects the safety of Americans.
And that is clearly laid out in the opening up America again.
I have a question because we got data from Tokyo, an increase of cases and a double of the cases in Singapore.
We've been looking a lot at Europe after China and then we're back into this area of the world.
We don't want that to happen.
It could happen.
cases going down. Any lessons to take out of what's happening in this area, in Asia,
after having put our heads up?
In that order.
In that order.
We have to be very careful. We don't want that to happen.
It could happen. I think we'd stamp it out if it does happen.
We're not going to be doing any mass closures.
In my opinion, fewer things should happen.
So I think we could.
You know, I call them some burning embers, and we put them out.
And I think we've gotten very good at that.
Put the thing on top of that thing, and the fire goes out.
We'll see.
But we don't want that to happen.
No, absolutely.
You can tell me, Mr. President, once the reopening happens, we won't need to go back.
I don't want to do that.
You don't want to do that.
Nobody in this room wants to do that.
You look forward, I think, very soon to sitting next to a lot of your fellow reporters, right?
The room seems so empty this way.
But it's one of those things.
Yeah, go ahead, please.
The Press Thank you.
On the topic of public support for your immigration freeze, an Ipsos USA Today poll just came
out and found 80 percent of Americans are supportive of the immigration halt, the temporary
freeze.
Did that have any — The President Yes, I know that.
Eighty percent.
The Press Did public support have any effect on your decision-making here?
And are you surprised by those numbers?
Yeah, that's a high number.
I did not see that number.
I heard there was a poll.
I'm sure there'll be a lot of polls.
No, look, I think the American people want to make sure that they have jobs for the American people, not for people that come in, in many cases illegally, into our country.
So we're doing that.
I don't know what the numbers are.
This is a perfect example of why they don't want to run the briefings.
I think just common sense tells you that's where we should be, and that's where the American people want to be again.
So they want to talk about Donald Trump's executive order rather than allow him to lay it out in detail.
I think it's going to be a renaissance.
We're going to have something that will be a lot of people going to go to work building those roads and bridges and tunnels and highways and all of the other things we're going to be building.
And broadband for the Middle West.
I mean, the farmers haven't been treated fairly.
The farmers have been treated terribly when it comes to the Internet, so we're going to take care of that.
We're going to make them very happy.
So we'll see you all tomorrow, and we'll have some interesting things to put out tonight, and I appreciate you being here.
It's an honor to have Britt Baer here.
I've used his slot a lot, John.
I've used that slot a lot.
I'll have you back soon.
Thank you very much.
Thank you, everybody.
Thank you.
Peace.
I'm out.
Rather cordial.
All right.
Yeah.
Well, listen, like I said, we did our best to not add anything.
Right.
But I just can't help myself, especially when you're a reporter who's a dead ringer for Mr. Bean.
Yeah.
Spot on.
Just can't not.
What are you going to do?
You're going to take Dr. Birx?
You're going to put a perfect 10 in front of me and expect me to not notice?
I was respectful.
So this is interesting when you watch it.
They talked about phase four.
They talked about the three-phase sort of reopening of the economy.
And then they mentioned phase four.
And then they asked him something about six phases at some point.
I don't know what that means.
It was generally actually... And honestly, outside of Brett Baier in that one American News, who by the way, did you notice she wasn't in one of those sort of Delta lounges?
Yeah, she was off to the side.
She was up on a bar stool somewhere.
Yeah, she was up separately.
They, like, put her over there.
Yeah, they didn't give her, but they allowed her to come back in.
Free drink section.
It was really mostly pretty cordial.
There were a few times where he got testy.
Now, I guarantee you, if you go to HuffPo, if you go to Reddit Politics, if you go to CNN, they're going to take the interactions that were more hostile, and I would say rightfully so, because here's the thing.
If you have interactions, let's say, with a room full of people, let me ask you this.
If you go to a house party, okay, and there are 20, 30 people.
How much do you want to bet at least one of them's going to be an asshole?
But should you be judged by how you played catchphrase with the singular asshole?
Or how you played it with the group?
He did it, it was overall a give and take.
I think he was pretty, himself, he was pretty descriptive.
Dr. Brooks is great.
I think she's actually way better than Fauci.
I think she's good to actually have at these.
No one's really talking about her, by the way.
And I think the reason for that is because Fauci has sometimes come out and sort of contradicted Donald Trump.
And again, he's very narrow-sighted in his approach to this, which is just the medical side of issues.
Dr. Birx, you heard her talk about sort of the medical data, that it is data-driven, that we do have to make sure that testing is up to snuff, and that different states will have to be taking different approaches, but that we also need to balance that with the economy.
This was honestly I mean, he looked tired to me, Donald Trump.
He definitely was a little less punchy than normal.
Well, when you say punchy, you mean a little less fire in him, not punch drunk like Joe Biden.
No, no, no, not punch drunk.
He can complete sentences, so that's good.
Joe Biden makes Larry Holmes sound like a Mensa member.
So this is remarkable to me.
I think that, first off, this is, if not during what you call the worst crisis of our life, the worst crisis in several hundred years, what you have compared to World War II, what you have compared to all other pandemics, the pandemic to end all pandemics.
If at that point in history, by your own description, you don't run the briefing being broadcast directly from the White House, then you are not doing your job.
You have decided that broadcasting the news is not as important as your opinion journalism.
Right, the unfiltered news.
Right, and we know that about MSNBC, we know that about places like Salon, HuffPo, Young Turks, of course, but I think a lot of people, no, people didn't expect that from CNN for a long time.
Up until the last election, you can go back to this, back when I was syndicated on radio.
I talked about this, my first broadcast ever, and I talked about it on Fox News.
I think you would go back to 2014 when this show was syndicated on radio, if I'm not mistaken.
I said, listen, I don't have a problem with MSNBC.
I don't have a problem with Rachel Maddow.
I don't have a problem with political bias.
Just don't lie to me about it.
And the reason that these mainstream news outlets are refusing to run these press briefers is because that prohibits them from lying about it.
Yeah.
It almost ends up being free campaign speeches for Donald Trump because he is doing a good job and because we are seeing positive data.
Nobody else is reporting it.
He uses these press briefings as an opportunity to get in front of the American people and say, here's what's actually happening.
Yeah.
And I don't think they enjoy helping him win re-elections.
And if he came off looking like a buffoon, they would want to show it.
Of course, they would be tripping over themselves to get into the room.
But instead, they want to pull out clips out of context to make them seem like a buffoon.
Here's the thing.
I don't think that I've missed a single briefing outside of last night, actually.
He very rarely actually mentions 2020 or his polls.
Did you hear him mention that at all tonight?
No.
Did you hear him mention his chances in 2020 at all?
Did you hear him mention his polls at all?
The one time he was asked about the poll where 80% of Americans, and I don't know if I can verify that or not, 80% of Americans support some kind of moratorium on immigration right now, which sounds about right.
That may be a right-leaning poll, to be fair, but I still think that a vast majority of Americans probably support this right now when they look for future employment prospects.
He actually diverted away from me.
He said, well, listen, I didn't know about the poll.
And he answered very clearly.
He had an opportunity at that point to say, yes, I went by the polls, and I'm doing great at the polls.
Instead, he said, this wasn't a decision made based on polls, unlike the Clinton presidency, which was entirely dictated by polls.
And that's when he was more of a centrist, by the way, a Newt Gingrich-led house.
He had the opportunity to go out to flaunt his poll numbers good or not, discuss them, and we do have some poll numbers
coming out that are pretty good.
Instead, he avoided it, he sidestepped, and actually, if I'm not mistaken, he gave the
floor again to Dr. Birx.
He did, and one of the things that he tweeted out today was that he addressed the poll controversy,
because people are like, what are you talking about your poll numbers for?
Not poll numbers for, sorry, the rating numbers that he was talking about.
And he said, look, the only reason I'm mentioning that is because the fake news media won't
I'm trying to get around them and get information to the American public.
I'm not saying that these things are doing well because I'm trying to build myself up.
I mean, I'm sure he has some kind of motivation there where he's like, this is great, this feels good.
But at the same time, he's saying, guys, people want to watch this, and you're refusing to let them because it doesn't push the narrative that you want.
And you know what else I really noticed from these briefings?
And people are going to get mad at me for saying this, and this could be a write-up at Media Matters, but I really don't care.
It shows you that the leftist media panders to the lowest common denominator.
What do I mean by that?
They pander to the lowest common denominator, meaning people, 47% of Americans who don't
pay income taxes, federal income taxes.
They pander to the percentage of Americans who actually stand to make more, who have
been perpetually, serially on unemployment indefinitely, who are now going to get an
extra check.
They want those people.
They need those votes.
Donald Trump is talking to, and this is what kind of, it shook up Michigan.
It surprised me.
I've never been more wrong in my life where I thought Donald Trump could never win Michigan.
But the fact is, most Americans want to work.
Most Americans don't want to suckle at the public teat.
Most Americans want to be productive.
Most Americans want to earn their keep.
And these press briefings are directly aimed at those Americans, not the Americans who
are looking to skate by on a handout.
And people will try and say that comes with all connotations.
No, I'm just talking about the numbers.
If you look at all of the online articles, you look at the online news outlets, let's call them that, you even look at the mainstream news outlets, they create this sort of dynamic where it's like most Americans don't want to go back to work and most Americans want to stay at home.
And Donald Trump, this is a very risky bet.
When you watch these briefings.
And that's why I encourage everyone to watch these briefings.
We've even talked about just live-streaming them on CrowderBit so you can watch them every night.
I know it's not really what we do because we are not journalists.
I'm not a journalist.
I am biased.
I'm a late-night comedian.
I want to be very, very clear about that.
But we've thought about doing it because it is very important that this message gets out to the Americans who want to work.
And that's a gamble that he's making.
Donald Trump is betting on the fact that this broadcast will get out to the Americans Who make up the American labor force, who made up the single most comprehensive full employment, as he called it, which I think is actually, I would use that.
If I were someone crafting his campaign messaging, if I were managing his campaign, I would absolutely focus on the idea of full employment that we had before this pandemic.
We had the best unemployment numbers there were.
And job participation.
It was great.
And record job surpluses.
So it's not just the unemployment numbers that Barack Obama would try and go out and tout.
It's about how many people are participating in the labor force.
So, that's a bet.
And this is why Donald Trump seems more optimistic than the media.
Donald Trump, just like I've said this before, you know, if Democrats are the party of the poor, well, then to be elected they require that most Americans be poor.
If the Republicans are the party of the rich, then, again, by the power of deduction, you can obviously understand that Republicans would have a vested interest in 50% of the country being rich.
Donald Trump can only make this bet.
In broadcasting to everyone, unfiltered, unedited, he knows that news media are going to take sound bites.
He knows that they're going to cut clips out of context.
He could only make this bet if he believes in the American workforce, if he believes in the American spirit of exceptionalism, and he believes that Americans want to find a way to keep the most vulnerable among us safe, which we all do, and Americans want to get back to work and earn their keep.
If he didn't believe that, He wouldn't broadcast these press briefings.
He wouldn't do them every day.
He certainly wouldn't take that risk.
So the very risk that he's taking, inherent with the messaging that you see in these briefings, is by itself optimistic.
And listen, there's a lot to be optimistic about.
I know it's a hard time.
When people say, look for the silver lining, there are many silver linings right now.
doesn't mean that it's easy. If there's a silver lining, it doesn't mean necessarily
that it's easy. That's why you're looking for a silver lining at this point, as opposed
to a casing. It is surprising. The things that aren't said is the bet that Donald Trump
is making. He's kind of, sort of like with this show.
We've talked about this where, you know, I was in entertainment and in comedy for a long time and then was even at Fox News for years and I was told, hey listen, obviously liberals don't like this kind of content.
Conservatives don't like this kind of content.
They just want talking points.
They want Obama doomsday.
They do not want to sit back and laugh, and we just had faith that there were enough people out there who wanted to see this kind of a program, who related to this kind of content.
People out there who are conservatives, who by and large are people of faith, who do want to be politically informed, but also want to be entertained, want to be able to watch a late-night show and not be gut-punched.
This was a gamble that we made, and you guys made it worth it.
You guys out there, you said, you know what?
I'm going to tune in.
So we can only make that gamble if we believe that there are enough people out there who want this to exist.
Donald Trump can only make the gamble of these press briefings, and it is a gamble, that's a big change of pace by the way, if he believes in the American spirit, and that's why the media doesn't want to broadcast it, because they don't.
That's my takeaway.
Thank you guys so much for tuning in.
Again, the promo code is QUARANTINE.
$30 off for the entire month of April with the quarantine.
Of course, tomorrow morning at 10 a.m.
Eastern, we will be doing Good Morning Mug Club.
We're doing that through the end of April.
Dan Crenshaw is going to be on the show.
We will see you tomorrow.
Hopefully, I'll get some sleep.
I gotta land this plane.
Bye!
She hurt her!
I know.
She finally made me realize.
She's so beautiful.
I'm so proud of her.
I'm so proud of her.
I'm gonna be alright.
It may take a few days.
I'm gonna be alright.
Good.
Good.
Unicorns I love them.
You're lucky too.
Unicorns.
Unicorns.
I'm in the middle.
I'm in the middle.
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