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April 8, 2020 - Louder with Crowder
30:59
HAPPY DOG EATS TOILET PAPER FOR HALF HOUR! | #5 Good Morning MugClub
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Time Text
Welcome to a very special edition of Good Morning Mog Club.
I am your host, Stephen Krader.
Audio Wade is here with me.
Yes, happy to be here, Stephen.
Today, perhaps one of the most controversial installments as you see the toilet paper sort of champagne tower, if you will, in the studio right now.
Very soon, Betty Crowder, a doggo Argentino with very much an unhealthy penchant for toilet paper, will enter into the studio live and absolutely ravage it, we believe.
Of course, the hashtag is Mug Club Quarantine, where you are getting more content than ever before.
I'm incredibly grateful to the team here and the promo promotional code is quarantine where you will get $30 off right and as we go into this some folks may be Shocked by what they see here.
Yes, and I certainly understand.
I understand the disturbing nature of this but Stephen, why do this today?
Why during this time?
We've certainly, here at the Lennox Credit Program, some could argue we've had more bombastic programming before, confrontational, but nothing as controversial with gross disregard for the needy in the face of a toilet paper shortage.
But for those who don't entirely understand, I'm reminded of the story of the starfish, the young boy who saved a starfish and there were thousands washing up upon the sea.
A man said, why don't you throw that one starfish back into the ocean?
There are thousands of other starfish.
He said, but I could save that one starfish.
I know that many people out there are clamoring for toilet paper and forced to use unflushable wet wipes right now, which has caused a great problem for the septic tank industry.
But we can't help all those people, but we can provide one day of bliss for a young doggo puppy.
Yes, and many don't know that that young boy was you.
It's true.
I have genetic profiling that identifies an IBD gene, which is different from IBS, and then IBD is far more severe.
I'm getting word that Betty Crowder is going to be leaving the dog pen soon.
Getting ready to send her in.
And very curious as to how she approaches.
Oh, there she is right now.
She's checking.
She seems to be checking it out.
She's checking.
It was a question if, there we go, right away grabbed a single roll of toilet paper.
That's what I suspected, understanding sort of the breed standard.
Yeah.
She's never been faced with this much toilet paper in front of her.
She usually has to sneak a roll, of course, from the bathroom.
Right.
Or sometimes from the linen closet, which is where, a little inside baseball here, that's where we keep our toilet paper.
We don't just call it the linen closet at the Crowder household.
We call it the linen and your toilet paper closet.
Wow.
So it's very curious as to how she would react when faced with an entire... Now, you see this right here, how she is... She's pawing at the toilet paper.
She's separated it from the pack.
Right.
It's very cute.
It is.
It seems very cute to the untrained eye.
I sort of say the paws on there underneath her chin are sort of like the Sears catalog family photo you might send out in a Christmas card.
Certainly.
Of course, in her mind, she's absolutely murdering senselessly that roll of toilet paper like a baby mountain lion cub.
Wow.
Because that is, of course, the history Yes, and Betty is, as you said, a Dogo Argentino.
That's correct.
Yes, and you mentioned the breed history.
Tell us a little bit about that.
Oh, wow.
Look, she's really, if you can see this, applying torque.
Look at the way she's using her neck and head really in a twisting motion.
Wow.
Just shredding that toilet paper.
And that's something that's actually very characteristic of the Dogo Argentino breed.
You know, it always bothers me now that it's sort of become slang to refer to dogs as doggos.
You'll see on Instagram people saying, good doggo.
It's dogo Argentino.
Doggo doesn't mean anything.
A lot of people think that that's translated from the Spanish pronunciation of dog, and that's entirely incorrect.
Right.
That's not at all.
Right.
That is a persistent myth, however.
I'm not entirely aware of the pronunciation of Dogo in Spanish, but in French it is Chie.
And I would believe, considering that they all originate the Romance languages from Latin, it would probably be more similar to that.
Now look at this.
She's really peeling off layers here, which shows a great magnitude of control, because that toilet paper only exists truly for as long as she allows it.
So she is powerful but merciful.
And there's certainly an intense amount of focus.
Yes.
I was at some level expecting her to approach the entire pyramid at once, but she does seem to have honed in on this particular role.
Yes.
Is this common for Betty in particular and for Doggo Argentinos in general?
That's an excellent question.
It is Doggo Argentino.
They're not out there wearing pleated pants.
That's not Doggo Chino.
Not quite in the J.Crew catalog.
I apologize.
I like to have a laugh.
Well, one moment.
See, she just stood up and twerked it.
That's what we call the death blow here.
Tango Argentinos were bred from a long lineage of hunting.
Look at that.
Oh, wow.
Look at that twerk.
Just imagine if that were a boar or a cougar, which is what they were bred to hunt.
Doug Argentinos.
A lot of people think that they are large pit bulls, but they actually don't share any of the same lineage.
Of course, both in the bully breed territory, but duggos hunt in packs, and they would seclude, for example, a boar or a mountain lion away from the rest of their brothers and sisters, pin them, and slowly just tear the life from... Oh, and now she's... Look at this.
Wow.
She seems to be approaching more toilet paper, much like a pyramid of avocados at a grocery store.
Yes, very similar.
Testing one by one.
And look, you know what?
That's a remarkable understanding of efficiency because rather than chase the rolls that are falling and wasting energy, she understands that there are more rolls.
And right now she's simply deciding, almost like Jenga, which role would be the easiest for her to take out in a weakened state and exploit.
I can't quite see... Oh, wonderful, another angle.
Yeah, the persistence and the patience really is worthy of note.
A remarkable breed.
A remarkable breed.
You know, they are a breed that are not for a first-time dog owner.
You know, if you have a Golden Retriever, perhaps a Cocker Spaniel, and you don't know how to train a dog, they get out of line.
At best, it's insufferable.
At worst, it's somewhat acute.
With a doggo, they will take your life.
No questions asked.
Wow.
Absolutely.
And Betty, in particular, has shown an affinity for toilet paper.
When did you first notice Betty's love for toilet paper?
You know, it was very interesting.
We were advised to punish Betty when she would take food from the table with a rolled up paper towel roll.
And not so much, of course, for people out there not to harm her in any way, but that sound.
We were advised to scare them, kind of like, very similar to a rolled-up newspaper roll.
And instead, she actually swiped it from my hand and began devouring it, which we thought was, at the time, amusing.
But looking back, we absolutely should not have laughed because we really created an engram in her where she believed that to be appropriate behavior, and we created a monster.
I have to say that living with a Duggo Argentino like Betty was an affinity for toilet paper.
During the coronavirus pandemic is it's very similar to Not of course to make light of those who've suffered at the Holocaust but being a Jewish Individual in an attic with a baby who won't stop crying with the SS on the the main floor below you.
I don't quite similar I don't think that's making light of it at all.
I don't think so.
Well, it's a comparison that I think is necessary during these hard times certainly Yes, and I notice that Betty does have a patch of loose skin on the back of her neck.
That is correct.
Yes.
Is that characteristic of all Dogo Argentinos, or Betty in particular?
Yes, for many people asking this question.
Again, these dogs are bred as hunting dogs and protectors of the farm in Argentina.
Also, little known fact, the most hated country in South America, though some argue it's a
little bit of jealousy there, kind of like Canada with the United States there.
Oh, certainly.
They certainly are wealthier on a financial level and their women are more attractive.
Better soccer players as well, but yes, they have bred these dogs to hunt boar and cougar.
And the reason for that loose skin, those folds in the back of the neck, reminiscent of a sharpay,
And the reason for that loose skin, those folds in the back of the neck, reminiscent
of a sharp A, but without the unstoppable, never-ending yeast infections, is if a cougar,
but without the unstoppable, never-ending yeast infections, is if a cougar, a mountain lion,
a mountain lion, or a boar should grab Betty by the neck, she can still wrap around, almost
or a boar should grab Betty by the neck, she can still wrap around, almost like a hip out in
like a hip out in perhaps Greco-Roman wrestling, and pin the wild animal by the neck.
And that's a big difference between them and, for example, German shepherds or Dobermans,
in that they pin and hold the kill there, the animal, until the owner comes and ceremoniously,
in the traditional fashion, kills it with a knife and lets it bleed out.
And as we look here, we do see Betty continuing to go one by one through these rolls of toilet
paper.
Again, we see a perseverance.
And that's a surprise to me.
Is it?
It is.
I was a little apprehensive in broadcasting this because I thought, well, we're doing this live and there's a strong chance that she simply bulldozes through.
The toilet paper rolls like the the gentleman the ambassador previously for up for Kool-Aid the beverage
But instead she seems to be very strategic and how she's approaching this bordering on cautious
Yeah, I do miss that advertising campaign. It was a very effective advertising campaign also a very fear
inspiring Awe-inspiring.
People don't talk about that enough.
They don't.
It was very true.
And I don't know exactly where Betty has left the toilet paper.
Has she become uninterested in these?
I don't know if she's become uninterested.
That would seem out of character for her, considering just how much she finds herself magnetically drawn to toilet paper at this point.
And there's still plenty of toilet paper left.
She does seem to be approaching the door.
That is interesting, and of course we have, for those who are worried, we have locked her in.
She did go potty before this broadcast, and she will not be let out until she's finished her toilet paper.
It's similar to the equivalent of a father finding a son with a Marlboro, and then forcing him to smoke the rest of the pack of cigarettes.
Inducing nicotine poisoning.
She has approached the collection again.
Rejected that one.
Apparently there must be something wrong, and of course the quality control can't be as stringent as usual when you have a shortage during these times.
We do have a mixture here of single and double ply.
We have several different brands.
Betty does prefer double ply, but we believe that it would be environmentally unsound to exclusively use double ply.
And I understand that some of our viewers may have some health concerns about Betty's eating.
That is correct.
As a matter of fact, we are seeing some tweets right now.
A gentleman by the name of Reginald right now is saying that this is very f***ed up.
That is very f***ed up, he said.
Well, everyone is entitled to their opinion.
It is not entirely with disagreement from us here.
We do enjoy hearing from our listeners.
The promotional code is Quarantine $30 off.
And now she seems to be taking a break, Betty.
You just see the muscle on the back of those thighs.
You just see what a powerful animal it is.
Very similar to a mountain lion.
How so?
Well, I just mean in the fact that there's lean, long muscle bellies.
And almost like a swimmer.
Benny, of course, is 92 pounds.
And she was anticipated to be much larger.
She was a pick of the litter, but that would be actually rather grunty for a Duggo Argentino because she did have a health scare when she was young as a reaction to anesthetic.
And we considered actually not reviving her, but that was primarily due to cost concerns.
Certainly.
Well, 92 pounds, do you think that this is an advantage or a disadvantage in this scenario?
That's a very good question, because you do have to balance, and you'll see this with sort of packs of doggo Argentinos who go out on a wild boar hunt.
Typically, if they need to roam longer distances, they'll send out the smaller doggos.
It is a balance of endurance and power.
And at around that 92 pound mark, she would be right in the middle of the pack.
Sort of a doggo of all trades, if you will.
And very, very powerful animals.
Very agile.
She seems to have found something toward the center of the pile.
Maybe an especially delicious roll.
Well, I think we've all been guilty of that a time or two, especially around Thanksgiving.
You know, many people ask, actually, are they intelligent dogs?
And the answer to that is unequivocally no.
Very much not the case with doggo Argentinos.
Highly unintelligent.
I found them incredibly easy to trick.
They have no sense of space or time.
If you, for example, pretend that you are throwing a ball, but, you know, what do you have behind your back there?
They don't know the difference.
Wow.
If the Doggo were a Cuomo brother, which would it be?
Well, that's a very difficult question to answer, of course, because they're all very tragically functionally retarded.
And fortunately in Betty's case, she's right at the middle of the bell curve for Doggo Argentinos.
Not at the bottom quite like the Cuomo family, but still quite challenged in that area.
I do see how that could be an unfair comparison.
My apologies.
Do you see how this is actually, she's stringing it out here.
I believe she's looking for a chase.
This has been too easy, so she wants to watch the toilet paper unravel.
These dogs, they don't really want to attack dead animals.
They are bred for hunting and holding, and that instinct of an animal shaking beneath their grasp actually only encourages them to grip more tightly.
But when that toilet paper roll is just sitting there, you know, flaccid, as though they've just had a cup of coffee with perhaps the late Bill Cosby, or I guess not the late, but soon-to-be, it's very uninteresting.
So this pile of toilet paper is somewhat like a pile of dead raccoons.
She seems to Maybe be approaching it a little more slowly than if there was a risk involved.
That's true.
And really, what you want to do with these dogs, if you want them to be more lively, is to encourage their prey instinct.
So, if you run, they will chase.
If that toilet paper roll glides across the floor like a streamer, she's far more likely to be active.
And, of course, also people who are noticing right now, Betty, since her health care, has an abnormally large anus for Doug O. Argentino, which is a Problematic when it comes to, obviously, no one wants to... One of the perks of having a canine friend is not having to wipe.
That's very similar to working overtime without extra pay.
Interesting fact, too, about Betty.
She perhaps gets this.
There's a famous doggo Argentino, if you run a YouTube search, called Morocho, who protected two children on an Argentinian farm from a mountain lion.
They found the children in a tree, Marocho, missing about half of her face, her orbital bone, and a dead mountain lion.
She was willing to serve her life to protect those children, and Betty is a direct descendant, I believe, a great-granddaughter of Marocho, and of course has none of those instincts, as I have no doubt that if I was chased down my home drive with a Yorkie, she would leave me for dead.
Interesting nonetheless.
Yes.
Yes.
Very much so.
And again, our promotional code is quarantine $30 off for Good Morning Mug Club.
This obviously cost us a small fortune.
We are seeing now from one Mr. John in Massapequa, New York, who has tweeted, F*** you for this.
Seriously, I hope you die.
And it just repeats the first portion of that.
I don't think it's necessary.
Wow.
So it seems as though people are relatively upset with this, which we really should have probably... I have heard accounts of people having to take showers after each time they use the restroom, which again is sad.
And that's sad for us as Americans, but if you think about that, the French do that all the time.
They call it a bidet, but they're not fooling anybody.
I never thought of a bidet as a tiny little shower.
Of course.
And in Middle Eastern cultures, we all know they simply prefer to use their hand.
So if you manage to get yourself in a meeting with Kadafi, you're effectively squeezing the shaman.
Of course, not in these days of social distancing, in which case the new approach is bumping elbows after you've coughed into it for hours on end.
Well, we don't want to paint the Middle East in broad brushes, of course.
I would understand why one might feel that way, but I entirely said that with great purpose.
Maybe we should get back to Betty.
They do have also not big supporters of dogs there in the Middle East.
They see them as very dirty animals.
You know, we see them as our companions, of course, because look at the torque in that move right there.
Look at that torque.
It's artistry.
Which, by the way, interesting fact about doggos.
The bite pressure, which is measured in PSI, pounds per square inch, as a matter of fact, with a Golden Retriever, somewhere around 200 pounds or a standard Labrador, And I believe that a pit bull, a Staffordshire or American Pit Bull Terrier in German Shepherds, register around 300-something PSI.
The Doggo Argentino clocks in at a whopping 515 pressure.
Well, just imagine if you were one of these rolls of toilet paper.
Right.
It would be agonizing.
Agonizing, certainly.
And their bite pressure, I believe, is second only to two other dogs, the Caucasian Ovarchka
and the Kengal, which of course have a bite pressure of 700 pounds per square inch, but
not very great human family competitors.
The Caucasian Ovarchka also very bad at jumping.
Yes.
They are very much slow twitch muscle fibers.
It's a grind where they can apply that pressure, but gradually.
Of course, not to be confused with, for example, a Rottweiler, where they can apply it very quickly to the fast-twitch fibers.
a little bit of, you know, Betty's older brother, the late and great Hopper, was very friendly,
as you know, with other dogs, but did not get along very well with this one Rottweiler down
the block. And it was very reminiscent of the old mad comedy magazines, Spy vs. Spy,
is always how I describe it, Spy vs. Spy. Or, of course, that one famous scene from
American History X, but it was just an interesting dynamic.
I miss magazines.
I do as well.
Well, I was just noticing that Betty is moving away from the pyramid.
Though not quite a pyramid anymore.
I'd say really more of a bog of eternal toilet paper at this point.
The Egyptian masters would not be happy about this.
They would not be happy about this at all.
If they were planning on being embalmed, they would be sorely disappointed.
Of course, we jest, they didn't use toilet paper, they used some form of organic cloth, which we believe to be cotton, but no one knows for sure.
And this is interesting. It almost acts, her coat is a natural camouflage when surrounded by toilet paper.
I don't know about you, but at this point I'm having a difficult time identifying the doggo.
And this is an adaptive mechanism, of course.
Yeah, that's incorrect.
Not at all.
As a matter of fact, they don't even live in cold climates where snow would be present.
So, if anything, it would be a net devolvement for the species.
But it is beautiful.
It is a beautiful sight to behold.
Steve Jobs.
This is the sort of dog that Steve Jobs would have if he hadn't put himself in a shallow grave with a fruitarian diet and shunned Western medicine.
Ah, yes.
But he was a great minimalist, of course.
He of course was, yes.
It looks like Betty is moving behind the desk.
I don't believe there's any toilet paper there.
I don't believe there is.
And it looks like something caught her attention there on the red chair.
Oh, that's interesting.
Oh, something startled her there.
Wow.
Not entirely sure what that could be.
The chair seems to have moved unexpectedly.
Keep in mind that is the chair where even Brendan was sitting only several days ago, and there could be, of course, a foul odor emitting, which generally dogs would find pleasant, but this might just be too overpowering.
And if anyone is nervous about Betty approaching the chair where even Brendan sat, dogs cannot get the COVID-19 virus.
That's what we believed until just the recent transfer to tigers.
So we are hoping that the transmission from humans to animals is limited only to Exotic, highly prized.
Well, I hope the audience will forgive me.
I was operating on old information.
Oh, and she is pulling at the roll.
Look at that!
Look at that!
That's very interesting because, see, she has fully intact toilet paper rolls.
But like I said, it's that prey instinct.
There's an interest in movement.
Very much like a T-Rex.
A Tyrannosaurus rex, where she only takes... If you don't move, you're probably safer.
Also... Yes, go ahead.
I was just going to ask, this tidbit about T-Rexes, of course, is... The Tyrannosaurus rex?
Yes, speculation.
That is correct.
I'm not sure if we have backing up information for that.
That is correct.
We know, as a matter of fact, we know that that is incorrect.
Which really should surprise nobody, considering that they were making great determinations from fossil records to determine the efficacy of the vision of Tyrannosaurus rex.
It should surprise no one that that, of course, was pseudoscience.
And T-Rexes can see you.
If you were to stay still with a T-Rex, you would simply be a dead T-Rex.
And Michael Crichton, rest in power, of course.
Yes, absolutely.
Rest in power.
Michael Crichton.
Brilliant.
Almost an oracle, Michael Crichton.
And I wonder what he would say if he could be here today to watch this spectacle before us.
No doubt he'd be impressed.
Certainly.
And she is approaching the toilet paper pyramid again.
Seems to have slowed her pace.
She does seem to have slowed her pace, and you have to ask yourself if that's a byproduct exhaustion, you know, as with any other athletic endeavor,
lactic acid buildup, or if she simply can no longer breathe as she's blocked her
air passageways with the toilet paper, which upon reflection was a very
irresponsible endeavor for us to undertake, particularly for an entire
half hour of program. Certainly, but we can hope that that is not the
case. We can certainly hope that that is not the case.
There is key dog insurance taken out on Betty Crowder, as she is, of course, the spokesperson, very popular, for Walter Firearms.
And that's really because dogs can't drink coffee.
So Black Rifle gave a call to the Landers Crowder Studios and said, could Betty do some live reads?
And I said, well, I don't know how much you're aware, but coffee is a very potent neurotoxin for dogs.
It'll be a short-lived commercial series.
A little bit of dark humor there.
Because if you don't laugh, you'll cry.
That's true.
If you don't laugh, you'll cry, much as, of course, we would if she were to ingest significant amounts of the neurotoxin, which is known as caffeine, also filled with bromine and chocolate.
I believe that is... She has laughed.
No, she's there under the camera.
Oh, look at that.
My goodness.
Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the studio.
It's Betty Two.
Oh dear.
It looks like she has approached a role that was sitting on the couch.
Very clever to sort of an Easter egg hunt to place them at different locations throughout the studio.
But she does seem at this point as though she's She is ready to leave the studio.
Does that mean that she is... Are we close to her leaving?
I can't see her anymore.
I'm not sure.
I think we may send someone in to throw another roll of toilet paper just to see Okay, there she is!
She is back!
Never mind, looks like she has... Sort of a little bit of an escape from Alcatraz there, where she knows just where to stand so that we can't keep our eye on old Betty there.
A classic, though.
Yes, it is a classic, of course, which was entirely plagiarized in The Shawshank Redemption.
Yes, many people don't know that.
Though it was a less racist version of the installment, more palatable to the American public.
Again, we have a tweet right now, actually also on the live chat.
Someone's saying that this live chat sucks.
And we do hear you, and we do have an issue with the live chat available on BlazeTV, where you cannot enter in your username at the moment.
Yes.
But if you include your name in the message, we will be able to read it out.
Right.
We will be certain to immediately not get back to you.
That's true.
Certainly.
Look at that right there.
She's found a barrier.
Okay, that's another red chair.
She seems to be attracted to the red chairs, which of course, in nature, Bright colors like that are signals of danger.
Wow.
For example, we've all seen the crab that puts up its claws to reveal a red underclaw, and that's to say, hey buddy, you can try and take a gobble here if you like, but I don't think you'll enjoy how this ends up.
Nature is fun.
It is fun and scary.
Frightening.
Frightening at a visceral level.
It is.
We just realized how horribly equipped human beings are.
Oh, there we go.
Looks like someone was throwing a curveball into the mix.
One more roll of toilet paper to see.
Let's see if that chase instinct kicks in.
Oh, there she goes.
A little more cautious than I believed Betty would be, and certainly more so than I hoped she would be, considering the incredible amount that was spent due to the price gouging.
And we apologize.
Anybody in the Austin area or for surrounding zip codes will not be able to procure any toilet paper for the next four weeks due to this broadcast.
But we feel it was, of course, for a worthy cause.
And it seems she is approaching the role that was thrown in.
It's hard for me to tell, again, because they are all so similar.
They are similar, and again, she does blend in.
And she is, as I said earlier, adapted to live in toilet paper-like climates.
This is true.
Now, did you have any sort of a leaning?
Did you believe she would favor the single or the multi-ply?
Goodness, I, for one, did think so.
Sometimes when toilet paper rolls are thicker, they're labeled as being two rolls.
The larger roles.
I assume she would go for the larger roles.
But again, it's very hard to tell which of these roles she's going.
That's true.
And she's returning to that chair where Brendan was sitting.
That chair is drop-tested to 500 pounds.
It is industrial furniture, but at this point has been sitting largely unused due to guests on Skype.
So that is really just a trapping of That's right.
That's incorrect.
Dogs are not colorblind.
That's right.
After his most recent knee surgery, of course.
So there must be something about the combination there that is more interesting to him.
And dogs are, of course, colorblind.
So this chair very well might look like a large green chair.
That's incorrect.
Dogs are not colorblind.
We used to be under that impression.
But as a matter of fact, we found out that was a myth when Winston Churchill crumpled
up a packet of cigarettes.
And it was a packet of, I believe, New Porsche, the red packet of cigarettes.
Threw it into a fireplace.
And it resembled his, of course, famous British Bulldogs favorite red ball, which prompted
his dog to throw himself into the fireplace and die, not immediately, but later on of
third degree burns.
How interesting.
Many know that every time an election year comes around that a dog is sent to eat from one bowl or another that represents one candidate or a different one.
Correct.
Are we doing something similar with this exercise?
Are we approaching election time again?
I almost forgot.
It seems almost all anyone can talk about these days, of course.
That was a little sarcasm there.
I did have trouble with that.
I apologize.
Yes, I apologize.
Sometimes it's a little dry, the way that I approach humor.
But I would say it's more comparable to the way that we ring in the New Year, where, as of course you know, we have an older gentleman engage in physical feats of strength with a baby to see who, really if we are going to have four more weeks of 2019.
And so, I'm not entirely sure where the analogy started, but it really came from a good place and meandered a little bit, but I would say that's an apt comparison.
Well, it looks like Betty has become totally uninterested in the toilet paper.
Has she left?
Yeah, it looks like she's left the room.
It looks like we can officially count that time.
There, I believe the clock rings.
I don't have it in front of me.
About 32 minutes.
Well, that was absolutely captivating, a thrilling installment of live broadcast.
Certainly.
And I think that we should probably be doing this every Wednesday for Good Morning Mug Club.
Certainly.
We appreciate everyone who joined us.
Engage with your chats and your tweets, of course.
Do tune in Friday morning and this evening.
More programming than ever at linowithkraner.com slash schedule and use the promotional code quarantine for $30 off.
Um, as we appreciate the support it's required, and most importantly, if you don't, we will place, of course, Betty Crowder in a closet and beat her for days without mercy.
So that's not an empty threat.
Please heed my words.
Take them seriously.
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