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March 30, 2020 - Louder with Crowder

01:16:03

Premiere Episode! | #1 Good Morning MugClub

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	I swear to you, my wife and I were watching.
	We have an L-shaped couch, so we weren't even right next to each other.
	It's not like there could have been some telepathic communication.
	We just both went, oh, that's good.
	Both of us.
	And we felt very ashamed of ourselves.
	Certainly.
	All right, so some of the latest COVID news right now.
	Fauci, however you pronounce it, I don't really care, predicted up to 100,000 and 200,000 deaths in the United States.
	And so Trump has changed the guidelines now where we're going to be extending social distancing.
	Not until Easter, which would be a beautiful time.
	Wouldn't it be a beautiful timeline?
	Yeah, I don't know.
	I think the beautiful time-out or whatever mitigates the disease, but I do understand him wanting to be hopeful and get the economy restarted.
	He's the guy who likes a narrative.
	Yeah, he does.
	I mean, you know.
	And we had it going until Easter, when he rose and we destroyed the coronavirus.
	They rolled over the big boulder to the tube, okay, and they said, there's no virus.
	And the virus said, put your head in my side.
	And we said, no, not unless you watch the corona.
	You're not my savior.
	Corinthians 2.
	Let's go to a clip actually of Donald Trump for those who have missed it.
	This is the news this morning.
	Him changing or extending the guidelines.
	Therefore, we will be extending our guidelines to April 30th to slow the spread.
	On Tuesday, we will be finalizing these plans and providing a summary of our findings, supporting data, and strategy to the American people.
	Okay, so I want to be clear about something here.
	Everyone's now saying, okay, we're definitely going to have the number is 100 to 200,000 deaths in the United States.
	You think that's accurate?
	I think it's as accurate as they can figure out right now.
	Right.
	Probably overblown.
	I think it's as accurate as they can figure out right now, considering that the original study that they used for the modeling predicted 2.5 million in the United States.
	And then in the UK it was half a million, I believe, right?
	and then they downgrade it to 20,000 or keep it or much less.
	Yeah.
	What does that mean? Why pick it? Why pick any number?
	I'm no math guy, but that's different.
	That does seem statistically significant.
	It's like, listen, 99% of Americans will die before the age of 60 this year.
	What?
	Really?
	Or 1%.
	We don't know.
	Some.
	But it pays to get some hand sanitizer.
	I appreciate the verbal accuracy though, right?
	If you're like, it's between zero and ten billion people will die this year.
	I mean, it's harder to get more accurate unless you said zero to eleven billion.
	We're just making some space for them.
	The crazy thing is, and I've been watching CNN and preparing for this, and you let me know, we'll be chatting with you over there at BlazeTV.
	It's easy to get scared.
	It's easy to get scared when you watch CNN.
	Chris Cuomo was on CNN going, and Donald Trump, this is killing Americans.
	You have blood on your hands.
	You don't care about American lives.
	And they go, we passed every other country as far as infections.
	Well, hold on.
	The rate that matters is per capita.
	That is relevant because he can't compare us to a country that has a tenth of the population, depending on which country we're talking about.
	And if you look at the per capita death in the United States, it's very, very low.
	It's like five or six compared to China, Italy.
	It's not even close.
	It's not even close.
	So it's easy to get scared, of course.
	I understand it.
	We should all do what we can to avoid the virus.
	But this idea right now that you somehow don't care about the deaths of Americans, if you say, hey, completely crippling the economy, which will lead to mass unemployment, starvation, and, by the way, people losing their insurance and potentially dying from other, more deadly diseases, you do have to weigh the pros and cons of all these issues.
	There's no considering it.
	What I actually find interesting is that you'll see people talking about the lives and, you know, we need to do everything possible, no questions asked, we have to be able to save as many lives as we can, and yet in the same statement they're like, why can't we get back to work?
	Right. And it was like, hold on, hold on, you understand that those two things are different.
	And so you're going to have to make some hard decisions and that the government is wrangling
	with those things, whether you're a Democrat or Republican, right? I mean, no matter what
	side you're on, both of those parties are trying to figure out they have different ideas about what
	that solution looks like. Right. And certainly we believe there's one of the paths is better than
	the other. But it seems to me we're going, I said this before, we're going about it the wrong way.
	We're arbitrarily creating this list of what are the essential businesses.
	How about we do this?
	In Italy, 99% of people who died, 99%, this is from the New York Post, had pre-existing conditions.
	The guy who created the Imperial Study, or was associated with the Imperial Study, Neil Ferguson, he admitted that two-thirds of the people who died from coronavirus would have died within that year anyway.
	Now I'm not saying let's accelerate it and decrease the surplus population, but that is different.
	If 99% of people have a pre-existing condition, that is relevant.
	People should know that because if they don't have a pre-existing condition and they get the sniffles, not only should you not go panic buy toilet paper, but you should not be going to the emergency room and cluttering up space that could be used for not only people with coronavirus, by the way, There are still people out there with emphysema and stage 4 cancer and other serious illnesses.
	They need care, too.
	And a lot of hospitals have shut that down.
	I think it was in Brooklyn.
	I don't have this in front of me.
	There was another hospital that opened up to just serve non-coronavirus patients because they said they're being vastly under-recognized by doctors.
	One of the big solutions that's worked in other countries, and that certainly could be an option here, is you identify the people who are, well, I mean, I think they're killing themselves.
	Not all of them.
	Just the ones who tip two quarters.
	Yeah, just those guys.
	If it's less than two quarters, I mean, I've got no sympathy.
	The Sanderses.
	Not kill the Sanderses, only if they tip two quarters, you put them on the do not resuscitate list.
	Right.
	Anyone out there in the service industry, you know those people that tip you two quarters.
	I know you have a list.
	I know it's in red lipstick.
	I would be in red lipstick.
	Are you talking to your mistress right now?
	Is this what's happening?
	Is this your way of communicating?
	Don't sext on my show!
	Mr. Movie never saw Billy Madison?
	Steve Buscemi's riding the list in red lipstick?
	You have a point I think that you're about to make.
	Yeah, you don't watch movies.
	But the point is, you've got people who are especially susceptible, and we know, without question, nobody disagrees that certain people in certain age groups or pre-existing conditions are more at risk.
	So what we need to do is very strongly isolating those individuals.
	Amongst the family, right?
	I said this a long time ago.
	You did.
	You said it weeks ago.
	Isolate old people and the vulnerable.
	This is just an opinion, okay?
	And you can get really upset with me.
	It's not that I don't care about grandpa and grandma.
	This is what we have in the office.
	We have young, healthy people who have no symptoms.
	We probably had it in this office in January, honestly.
	It's possible, yeah.
	It came in much earlier than news reported.
	And then the two older employees, who are over the age of 55, are working from home.
	We've taken those precautions.
	I don't know why.
	Why don't we create a list of non-essential businesses that should be closed?
	Why don't we create a list of people who should be quarantined at this point, rather than say, everything shut down, everybody panic, everybody stay in the house, when the fact is, it's affecting a very small percentage of people.
	Here's something else that nobody tells you.
	The coronavirus, not this coronavirus, this is a novel coronavirus, But if you have Lysol, if you have Matt Cleaner, or anything like that, or you clean an industrial kitchen, you have a bottle and it says, kills coronavirus.
	It's been around for a while.
	Coronavirus, some form of it, not this form, typically makes up somewhere, I think it was 7-14% of all influenza cases.
	And right now they're not necessarily taking that into account.
	So at this point, if you were to lump in All coronavirus deaths, okay?
	All coronavirus deaths with the flu deaths this year.
	In other words, if we had not recognized it, and we would just attribute all this to flu deaths, it still wouldn't be an abnormally high season for flu deaths.
	So let's keep that in context.
	It matters.
	We need to fight this.
	Thank God private industry is stepping up and helping us.
	But I'm not going to be shamed into panicking.
	They're using a lot of the same tactics that they use with climate change right now with people if they go, hey listen, I don't think that we should shut down everything indefinitely.
	We might look into some states opening up more industries specifically to people who aren't all that vulnerable, and you are absolutely excoriated.
	You're turned into this pariah.
	It's like you're a pedophile who writes for a salon.
	What's crazy about this is it's already happening right now.
	We've already made the decision to choose certain businesses and suppliers because people go, oh, if you're within six feet of somebody, you're an asshole.
	And it's like, well, you know, I probably should hold my toddler.
	I don't know.
	It's hard to be a good parent and stay safe.
	Well, but that's okay.
	Well, what about at the grocery store?
	Well, as long as you stay six feet away, but if you grab the same box of Cheerios... We already know that there are ways to reduce the risks, and it requires being specific.
	And right now, I get it.
	People are panicking, governments are panicking, and they're just saying, you shut it all down!
	You shut it all down!
	Is that the Italian Prime Minister?
	You shut it all down!
	What happened to him?
	He came back on a trip from Texas, the cowboy hat.
	I don't know if it'll go through the roof.
	With the funny voices?
	Yeah, with the funny voices.
	That's the thing.
	during every press briefing.
	Right.
	And I mean, I'm telling you, morale will go through the roof.
	I don't know if it'll go through the roof.
	With the funny voices?
	Yeah, with the funny voices.
	True.
	You know what, that's the thing.
	I think if they could just deliver it with a funny voice.
	Like, about 85% of you probably going to die slow, painful death.
	I like to party.
	I am Yanko.
	I like to ride the skateboard.
	Here is my clown.
	And he just comes in, and the clown's dead.
	I forgot, by the way, we should have done... This is Morning News Roundup.
	The first thing that we do is Morning News Roundup.
	And we already did a story, but here we go.
	Morning News Roundup.
	I don't know what that is.
	So much slurping.
	We got that music from First Baptist Church, by the way.
	Yeah, we stole that one.
	And copyright from First Baptist Church.
	Thank you for taking part at First Baptist Church.
	Here's a little bit of what's going on in our neck of the woods.
	I think that's patented by Al Roker.
	By the way, he's down to three chins, Al Roker.
	Good for Al.
	He's dropping down from six.
	I don't know about six.
	I mean, you'd say five and a half.
	I'm going to give him that half because he really needs it.
	Do we have, actually, before we move on, we do have a traffic report because this is a morning show, a new show for you guys.
	Hit the notification bell, by the way, if you're subscribed on YouTube.
	Use a promo code quarantine, hashtag MugClubQuarantine.
	We'll be reading some of your comments, tweets a little bit later on, but only for MugClub members, everyone else.
	You get to watch it for free.
	You don't get to talk with half-Asian Bill.
	That's a privilege.
	Not a right.
	Yeah, it's not a right.
	It's effectively a goods or service, and you need to provide some kind of a commodity.
	Preferably, picture some with you wearing very little clothing.
	That's for Bill.
	That's for half-Asian Bill.
	Nope.
	For the mistress.
	Alright, we have the traffic report, right?
	With Thomas Finnegan.
	Okay, let's go to that.
	Well, that is grating.
	Thomas Finnegan.
	Do we have Thomas Finnegan, our traffic reporter, on the line?
	Thomas, are you there?
	Good morning, Stephen.
	How are you?
	I'm fine.
	What can we expect this morning as people are taking part in their morning commute?
	Well, we're seeing some traffic from the bathroom to the kitchen, and you want to watch out.
	You've got a stray sock in there, so you want to hug left.
	Okay.
	Thank you very much.
	And by hug, you mean the wall.
	Correct.
	Okay, well it's a problem because I have a centerpiece there in that wall with a vase, so we'll need to move that.
	This is why I appreciate it, okay?
	Is there anything else we should know, Thomas?
	That's about it.
	There was a pile-up of torn up newspaper earlier, but that's been cleared away, so free lanes for all.
	Okay, thank you very much.
	much this has been the traffic update with Thomas Finnegan.
	Okay so let's move on to the next story.
	He's on top of it.
	He is on top of it.
	Can I tell you, I like Finnegan's mustache.
	I do.
	It's a great mustache.
	Well, you know what, it's from a bygone era.
	Yeah, it really is.
	I'm excited to hang on to it.
	You know what is still from a bygone era but remains?
	Before I move on to the coronavirus testing kits, because this is good news, Everyone must know this.
	The pajama pee hole space.
	What is it with pajamas where they put a button on the crotch, but it's way high up and there's this huge... So look.
	Let me show you this.
	My wife had to add this button.
	This button wasn't here.
	No, no, no.
	I'm wearing underwear.
	Blur it.
	Blur it.
	I'm wearing underwear.
	But if I was not wearing underwear, look at this.
	Look at this.
	Look at this.
	Why?
	Why would you do this?
	Look at the space from here to here compared to the space from here.
	Easy access?
	Look at that.
	Quarter Black Garrett, show them yours too.
	We had to put a safety pin on Quarter Black Garrett.
	Show them, show them.
	It's the same problem.
	Those are from JCPenney.
	This is from Haines.
	Yeah, look at it.
	Put your finger through.
	Poor quality.
	Take your pin out, put the finger through.
	This is a problem I have had three times where my schlong almost fell out.
	Do you have yours, Audio Wade?
	Yeah.
	Show them, show them.
	Look at this.
	It's way too much.
	It's too much.
	They decided... We know with jeans, if you have button flies, the buttons go all the way down the middle of the pants.
	With pajamas, they decided we're going to close up a gap of four millimeters at the top of the flap, and on the bottom, we'll leave about a foot and a half.
	I'm gonna make a sign.
	My brother dated a girl named Holly in high school.
	I was wearing Joe Boxer pajama pants.
	And I was watching TV like this, you know, in the book reading pose.
	And I turned around because she was on the couch.
	And I turned around.
	And when I turned around, I felt a breeze.
	Oh.
	That's a telltale sign.
	Yeah!
	And I was a late bloomer, so I was embarrassed, because it's very small.
	And then, this Christmas, my mother-in-law gets me a thermal union suit, because we're in Reno, Nevada, and we're skiing and stuff like that.
	I mean, they ski, and I just drink in the cabana.
	And she gets me, buttoned down and plied, I think at night, you know what, I'm gonna put this on and go on down with my mother, show her that I enjoy the jammies she got me for Christmas.
	And as I walk, there's a sliding door mirror in the bedroom, I take one step, one step, and it was enough inertia to, and my, my...
	Pecker fell right out, and I was going, I just avoided, by the skin of my scrotum, I just avoided my mother-in-law seeing all of it.
	Wow.
	Yikes.
	That's terrifying.
	Let me know in the chat, or tweet me, if you, as a man, if you've seen this, every brand of underwear, not underwear, pajamas, underwear they get it right!
	Underwear they put on two buttons.
	And you'd think it would be the same.
	Underwear, you already figured it out over here, put it on the pajamas.
	Learn from the underwear.
	It's absurd enough to the point that my wife asked me if I bought my pajamas at a sex shop.
	Because she thought they were crotchless men's pajamas.
	They're not!
	This is just how they do it.
	Okay.
	Let's move on to talk about, right now, the FDA.
	This is big news in Corona.
	Everything is pretty much Corona right now.
	But a lot of people may miss why this is important.
	The private sector has stepped up.
	The FDA just approved a new five-minute Corona test that could be a whole new ballgame.
	I think we have a clip to talk about it.
	On Friday, the FDA authorized a new test developed by Abbott Labs that delivers lightning-fast results in as little as five minutes.
	That's a whole new ballgame.
	There you go.
	Whole new ballgame.
	No ballgames.
	No ballgames.
	Totally illegal right now, President.
	Sorry.
	Well, no.
	I mean, you can play ball.
	It's super far away from each other.
	You just can't tag each other.
	Yeah.
	It could be stickball if they're playing out in the neighborhood and it's six feet apart.
	Six feet apart?
	What is stickball?
	Is it just baseball with a stick where it's hard?
	I believe so.
	It's baseball for poor people.
	Is that kind of like t-ball?
	It's baseball for homos?
	Or children.
	Yeah.
	I mean.
	But we repeat ourselves.
	All these children.
	Keep in mind, this is something that people missed.
	We talked about this with Dr. Choi last week, right?
	Where he said, oh, it's getting better.
	We had five tests.
	Now we have 30, 35.
	And that was from Quest Labs.
	And I know that because I do blood work regularly from some of my kind of pre-existing health conditions, where I go there about every two months.
	So I know Quest Labs.
	They're very quick.
	They turn around things quickly.
	And he was saying that they had created a lab test for corona, and now they were getting more tests.
	And that's a private?
	That's a private lab.
	And this one is coming from, I believe, Abbott Laboratories.
	Keep in mind that only a few weeks ago, the fastest test was several hours.
	Wow.
	Now we're talking about five-minute tests that don't require them to go up into your sinus like that film Artificial Intelligence with Haley Joel Osment.
	Did you see the cutaway of what it looks like when they put the thing down?
	Yeah, they're just touching your brain.
	They're actually touching your brain.
	No, but it seems like it.
	It's pretty close.
	It's pretty close.
	I don't think they have to do that anymore, though.
	No.
	Now they just saw right in your skull.
	Think about this for a second.
	When we talk about how we need socialized healthcare, in this example, we need socialized healthcare.
	Well, well, hold on.
	The CDC, they were the only ones who were cleared by the FDA to create these tests.
	They weren't ready in time and it took hours or significant turnaround time.
	They had to swab your brain and it didn't work.
	The second we approve any from private businesses, you can do it in five minutes at home and you don't have to scratch your medulla oblongata.
	It is interesting how many people are like, I can't believe we're gonna let these private companies make money off this.
	Oh, okay, so you're against jobs.
	Oh, no, I mean, no, I'm not against jobs, just people making money at their jobs.
	Yeah, let me simplify my point of view.
	Whoever develops the cure for coronavirus should be a trillionaire.
	Step aside, Jeff Bezos.
	I don't care what you do.
	I don't care if you do next-hour shipping.
	The guy should just walk through and go, I'm sorry, Jeff.
	Corona swab.
	I do the corona swab, and you make crappy movies because you have all this money, but for some reason you desperately want to be a part of Hollywood.
	No one understands this about Jeff Bezos, but it really is bizarre.
	Yeah, why is he at the Oscars?
	Yeah, it's a bizarre thing.
	Do we not think that the guy who created this lab, who created the five-minute test, deserved more than some loose pocket change?
	Yes.
	And can you name me one example?
	One example during this pandemic.
	People out there.
	One example where the government has been more efficient than private industry stepping in.
	Oh wait, Eddie!
	Send it to me!
	Crickets.
	I mean, only in the things that they don't let anyone else do.
	Like nukes.
	Right, that's true.
	Oh, I was talking about the coronavirus.
	Yeah, but I mean, that's what I mean.
	Maybe that's a cure.
	Well, I mean, it is, but not the kind of cure we want.
	It's like a Thanos cure.
	Depends.
	The Kurds aren't big fans of it.
	I'm not into nuking people.
	Look, maybe just call me Asian.
	You guys have a sore spot about that one.
	Yeah, literally.
	From radiation.
	It's not the folks at the post office that you want developing this cure.
	You want some folks who have some innovation, have some ambition, and actually want to use the stuff that they have, the skills that they have, and make tons of money.
	And also I would trust the cure more so to FedEx.
	Like if we decided to entrust the cure to a carrier service, it'd go FedEx.
	I would believe that.
	By the way, speaking of which, we have some sponsors here.
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	To be clear, we don't have utility patents.
	But we do have provisional patents pending, and then we were immediately told that they're not pending.
	They're no longer accepted.
	But we can sell them to you.
	We have a lot of stock to get rid of.
	By the way, something to keep in mind, the CDC, or it depends, the FDA, who you want to look at with this, they never replenish the stockpile of masks after Ebola.
	This is insane, that they didn't have the foresight to go, hey, we just had a giant We had a giant thing go on, and we used all the masks.
	Pandemic.
	I was thinking pandemic.
	Yeah, thing isn't as descriptive.
	We had a giant thing go on.
	I'm going to say it anyways.
	And they didn't think to replenish the masks.
	Well, they're going to blame Donald.
	This came out.
	They tried to blame Donald Trump because he was sending over equipment to China, right?
	And they were saying, oh, he was blaming that the stock wasn't replenished, and he sent stuff to China.
	Keep in mind, just a few weeks ago, they were blaming him for not sending enough supplies to China.
	So they were blaming him for not sending enough supplies.
	So he felt like he had to send some supplies.
	Right.
	And of course, then he realized, oh wait, there's not- we don't have enough soup.
	They never replenish the supplies.
	That's like me- Wait a second, wait.
	And it's not a sponsor, I don't think, because they're sold out, but Prepare with Crowder, we had those sort of bombshell- Yeah, that's right.
	Bet you're not calling me a conspiracy theorist now, but my wife and I ate all the oatmeal because it was so tasty.
	It was better than oatmeal.
	And then we realized when this went down, we're like, hey, what do we have as far as- Oh, darn.
	We have the broccoli cheddar soup.
	We're gonna starve!
	We ate all the oregano.
	Threw it out.
	We didn't replenish.
	Gotta start eating toilet paper.
	It's remarkable to me that he honestly has been blamed for sending stuff to China.
	I understand.
	I don't think he should have sent equipment to China.
	No.
	I don't think he should have.
	But keep in mind at that point we didn't know how bad it was going to be because they told us that it wasn't going to be very bad.
	Was he sending masks to China that were made in China?
	No, he's the one.
	We can probably bring this up.
	I think Donald Trump is the one president or one leader.
	Maybe there's another one, like, I don't know, like in Botswana.
	I have no idea.
	But of the major countries, they've refused testing kits, I think, and masks.
	Testing kits or masks from China.
	China?
	It's definitely masks.
	Yeah, and they don't work.
	What doesn't work?
	The masks.
	The masks that come from China.
	People have been using them, and they're like, yeah, you know those masks that you thought they were helpful?
	They don't do that.
	All Chinese masks?
	They have a significantly higher failure rate, and Donald Trump said no masks from China.
	There's a video floating around of a guy in a Chinese manufacturer, and he's rubbing the masks on his shoes.
	Have you seen that?
	Why would he be doing that?
	I don't know what China does, but China does what China's do.
	Wait, he's doing this before he ships out the masks?
	They're all, yeah, they're in the manufacturing place.
	That just seems spiteful.
	It does.
	Like, haha, hope you enjoy Dreykoff!
	That's like, uh, we used to go to Friendship Club.
	Why his feet?
	I don't, well, we, this is a thing.
	He might be retarded, because in Friendship Club, true story, my wife, uh, my wife was, this girl was really jealous of my wife's relationship with her aunt, and what they did was they would go to sometimes Disney World with people, this is a thing, it was like special needs, a group.
	Yeah.
	And so they would go to Disney World every year and she, this other mentally handicapped, what do we say, special needs, mentally handicapped, disabled, whatever the term is that doesn't offend you most, she was upset that my wife had a close relationship with her aunt who was leading this function at Disney World.
	And my wife came home, I shouldn't be wearing shoes, should I?
	Hold on a second.
	You're wearing shoes.
	I'm wearing shoes.
	I don't know why.
	But my wife came home to her hotel room in Disney World that night and out of spite, the special needs girl, she was snow angling in my wife's bed and rubbing her shoes on the pillow because she was jealous of her aunt.
	But it's the kind of behavior that you accept because she's mentally handicapped, or a member of Antifa, or Rights for Buzzfeed, but that's my point is this prejudice of soft expectations.
	It's wonderful for mentally disabled people, not so much just because someone's a minority.
	Like I wouldn't allow you to rub your feet on my...
	Pillow.
	It's okay.
	You don't have to let me.
	Well, it's already happened.
	He said it was Chinese foot binding.
	Well, you know.
	He's wrapping it in a pillowcase and tying it up with a nice bow.
	What else do we have here?
	CDC was the only place approved to kits.
	I don't know.
	Get the JFK.
	Oh, that's right.
	Here's something else that I saw this morning in News of the Morning.
	This is important.
	The FDA, they're still preventing, obviously, some private companies from conducting as many tests as they could.
	Some companies could supply 160,000 a day.
	They're only allowing 100,000.
	And Donald Trump, remember this, when he had that, what do you call it, summit, press conference, whatever he's doing, the briefings, whatever they call it now.
	And he said, maybe we could find a way to reuse masks, or maybe you could spray them with some kind of liquid.
	And then they said, there's no way to sterilize these masks.
	The FDA has now amended its initial approval granted early Sunday, now allowing Battelle to sterilize the N95 surgical masks without a daily limit.
	They can be sterilized, reused 20 times thanks to the FDA's loosening rules.
	You know, if capitalism is allowed to go unchecked, we're going to beat this coronavirus, and then where will CNN be?
	Ladies and gentlemen, we have to preserve the job of second-rate reporters by allowing this virus to continue.
	That's a good cue.
	Let's see.
	Speaking of second-rate reporters, wait, is that CNN?
	Yes, I am.
	I'm saying that because... Oh.
	That's not live.
	That's a clip.
	Take off that thing.
	That's a live.
	Let's go to live CNN right now.
	What are they looking at?
	They're looking at a ship.
	We're looking at the USS Comfort.
	This is the hospital ship.
	Okay.
	That's another interesting one, by the way.
	Was it the Princess?
	The cruise?
	Oh, yeah, yeah.
	The Princess cruise.
	I think it had 3,000 people.
	Again, this is a little more free flow.
	You guys let me know.
	We'll chat with you soon.
	The Princess cruise had 3,000 people.
	700 of them got infected.
	The death rate when you account for it, it was 1%.
	And then when you account for people who are below the age of 70, it was much, much lower.
	Like the death rate for people who are below 70 didn't have any kind of pre-existing conditions.
	You were talking about a minuscule amount.
	It's the closest thing that we have to a sample study of knowing who's infected and knowing as much as we could possibly know about their health effects.
	No one's talking about it.
	It's remarkable to me.
	Yeah, well because all, so you're saying that all of those people on the boat were tested.
	700 of them tested positive.
	Right.
	And then there's a 1% death rate.
	So yeah, that is basically a lab experiment.
	Yeah, it's contained.
	Because they're all floating around.
	I mean, they're not willing guinea pigs.
	Don't get me wrong.
	They weren't thrilled about it.
	They were a victim of circumstance.
	They chose to get on that boat.
	Guinea pigs are not willing guinea pigs usually either.
	That's true.
	But we don't really care.
	Yeah, right.
	Every single guinea pig signs a waiver.
	Oh, I didn't know that.
	It's really just claw marks on the other side of the door once you lock them in.
	And we take that as a form of consent.
	Also, by the way, consent is a big issue for guinea pigs in the fraternity sorority houses.
	Lots of guinea pig rape.
	Yeah, it's a real problem.
	I thought that was just guinea pigs.
	Well, that's what you would think.
	In other words, we just say, guinea pig gonna guinea pig.
	But we didn't take into account that many female guinea pigs have been oppressed for a long time.
	They're not big fans of it.
	Well, we should care about that.
	When we say they copulate like rabbits, we assume that both parties involved wanted to copulate.
	Sometimes they copulate like Chinese.
	sometimes they copulate like Chinese, you know, something that breeds a lot, a lot of
	people, 3 billion Chinese, 18 billion rabbits. Turns out, it's actually just rape.
	Oh no.
	So this colloquialism is really minimizing.
	Which colloquialism?
	They copulate like rabbits. You've not heard this?
	I thought we were talking about guinea pigs, I'm catching up.
	Well I'm saying rabbits are similar to guinea pigs.
	You know they're different animals, right?
	I know that they're different animals. We've all read the Richard Gere story.
	My point here is that we assume that the animals are both willing participants and we are now finding out that's not the case.
	You know what the funny part about that is?
	Richard Gere was not the consenting party.
	No.
	That's the tragedy of that story is Richard Gere was the one who was saying no.
	Oh no.
	Really?
	Yeah.
	Poor guy.
	He just can't catch a break.
	No, no.
	All this stuff is straight to DVD in that crappy dog film.
	Hiroji, what was it called?
	The dog still waiting at the train station.
	I think it's Pierogi.
	Yeah, is it Pierogi?
	The Polish dog?
	Pierogi.
	What?
	We're going to get to a little bit of President Trump's slow response.
	That's what he's been accused of here recently.
	But before we do that, actually, I want to keep things in context.
	We'll be getting to some of your chat here in a little bit or send in your pictures in the morning with your mug at twitter.com slash s Crowder Keep it in context because in Canada things are very different as a matter of fact right now There are people who are being arrested and fined thousands of dollars right for going outside and violating the sort of lockdown orders, right?
	Which, to me, is really scary.
	Just as scary, or scarier than the coronavirus, is the complete absolvement of rights that have been long-standing because we're afraid of a microbe.
	Not saying it's not serious, but that is, equally, we need to weigh this.
	So, actually, our favorite Greek-Canadian, who helps work with the show behind the scenes, but he's going to be our Canadian correspondent right now.
	To provide a little context and hopefully make you feel better about your day, let's
	go to Stories with Pentelus.
	I know it's crazy, but I wanted to give you guys a story to let you know that it could
	Like, be positive.
	Everything's good.
	I had a buddy a couple years ago.
	He went to jail and we had a little party that we were all at a little while after he got out of jail.
	It wasn't for him the party, but he was there.
	And I started making a lot of jokes about prison because I like to screw with people.
	And then he stormed out of the room and one of my friends that was there told me, yeah, don't make a lot of jokes.
	He went kind of crazy in jail because apparently he watches too many movies.
	And when he got into jail, because he didn't know anybody in there, He went and attacked someone that was like a known tough
	guy and he ended up getting the shit kicked out of him and then raped
	Repeatedly by like a lot of people and it was like a daily occurrence where he'd get beat up and raped
	so, uh So it could always be worse as i'm saying don't don't do
	the crime if you're not willing to go to jail And get raped and if you don't want to go through that or
	if you're not willing to rape, maybe that would have helped Point is uh, this virus thing could be worse
	Foreign It's always nice to put things in context, yeah
	By the way, Half-Asian Bill had to go urinate.
	Oh my goodness.
	He is a bulldog, but he has a very small bladder.
	Bulldogs have pretty small bladders.
	That's true.
	Right, because of the horrendous inbreeding in a designer breed.
	You've got to sit them in their zero-gravity chair and put a CPAP on them while they sleep.
	You have to massage their lower intestines so that they can make It's almost like they shouldn't exist.
	They really shouldn't exist.
	They have to deliver them all by C-section.
	Is this poop?
	Yeah, make.
	I've never seen this before.
	I mean, it makes sense.
	Just make.
	I think it might be sign language.
	I like it.
	I don't know.
	I like sign language.
	My mom used to use it every now and then.
	A little bit?
	Thank you.
	That's all I know.
	It's disgusting!
	Hey, let's go to CNN real quick and see what they have right now and see what we've gotten wrong so far.
	And, you know, it's all about how can we help these folks try to get back on their feet, try to, you know, get through weather, this storm.
	This is not just an issue in San Diego, but this is an issue, obviously, all across the country.
	So I really tried to set the tone here in San Diego.
	It's not only if you're Democrat, Republican, it's bringing this city together, putting policies that are going to help people, and help people now.
	Close the damn door, Bill.
	Come on.
	San Diego Mayor.
	Yeah, good luck.
	That guy on the right looks like a Fred Armisen character.
	By the way, keep in mind they have total cases and deaths on there, then they have the United States total cases and deaths.
	This is something when you tune into CNN, and one of these mornings we'll be doing just watching CNN and fact-checking during the break, almost like an ombudsman.
	Those numbers are significantly lower than deaths from the flu.
	Significantly lower.
	And so it does matter when the models that were used predicted 20 to 50 times higher deaths, especially when you consider the fact that these deaths are significantly lower than are registering right now if you take into account people who are over the age of 80 or if you take into account people who had serious pre-existing conditions who are going to die within that year anyway.
	Not saying we shouldn't take care of them because this isn't a socialized healthcare country.
	That's very common in Canada or in Italy where they just don't help you no matter what.
	The fact that the Do Not Resuscitate Order is a controversy in the United States tells you the different standard of care that we have here.
	But they just want to toss it up to scare everybody and show that the United States has handled this the most poorly.
	Actually, if you look at countries with socialized healthcare systems and you look at the per capita deaths, we have handled it incredibly well.
	The biggest hiccups, the biggest logjams that we have had have been the FDA and the CDC, and it's still happening.
	It's still happening with cures.
	It's still happening with vaccinations.
	It's still happening with tests.
	Think about everything that we've had problems with.
	We need more masks.
	Private industry is stepping up to fix it.
	We need more ventilators.
	Private industry is stepping up to fix it.
	We need more tests.
	Private labs are stepping up to fix it.
	We need more space.
	Private hospitals.
	Private caretakers.
	Apparently the concierge doctors now are reaching out and helping a lot of people.
	I wouldn't be surprised if at some point they start creating at-home care centers.
	There's a lot of doctors, not just a random guy at a truck stop.
	Speaking of the media trying to scare people, it was trending on Twitter this morning.
	CBS News was using shots from an Italian hospital.
	And when they were talking about New York, right and so it's it really is a big part of this narrative and like so if you show if you show these pictures of like 30 beds full of people it's it is gonna make a difference where you say those people are so yeah as I said it was turning on tour this you know it would horrify yeah Americans right outside of the coronavirus shots of Italian hospitals Yeah, period.
	People don't realize, it was Blodgett Hospital when I moved to Michigan.
	It was in Grand Rapids.
	So there were two times that I can remember going to the hospital.
	One time was when I tore my knee.
	Completely tore it and I had to get knee surgery.
	And the other time was, it turned out I had a small stomach flu and I got need in the balls.
	And so what happened was I went to this hospital because I was like, oh, my stomach's really bad and my balls were hurting.
	And so that seemed like something concerning.
	What I'd forgotten about was this kid who I was teaching jujitsu, like a little kid, need me in the balls.
	But it was like three days later, delayed reaction, so I went to the hospital, they were like, drink some kefir, ice your balls.
	That was the fix.
	Drink some prolax, ice your balls.
	But that was the first time I've went to an American hospital, and my wife took me in, and I said, these are, this is like a hotel!
	I've never seen anything like this!
	And I know not all hospitals are great here, and not all hospitals are terrible, but if you were to take the best hospitals in Montreal, when I lived there, it wasn't even close to this hospital, which wasn't considered necessarily top tier.
	It was an average hospital.
	The best hospital in Canada would be a horror show to most Americans, let alone Americans who mostly go into like 24-hour emergency clinics now.
	It's like going into a Hyatt.
	It's like going into a Spring Hill Suites.
	So if you were to show any Americans just Italian hospitals, they'd be like, oh my god, what a horror show.
	That was before, that was last July.
	We should do a before.
	We should just get a bunch of photos from before and be like, is this the hospital today?
	I mean, it's just a very different standard.
	And in other countries where you have to, you know, the commoditized health care, you just, you can't afford the kind of things that we have here.
	And part of the question is, you're never asking, is Italy going to come up with some cure?
	Where's the standard?
	All eyes are going to the U.S.
	Okay, who's going to fix this?
	U.S.
	I don't understand how the U.S.
	is criticized for being number one, but then is The sheer fact of being number one is a point to be critical, and then because you didn't do enough because you were number one, you're critical as well.
	Intervene?
	No, no, no, don't intervene.
	But like, intervene, but like, just give us money, but then leave us alone.
	Don't intervene, but pay three times the average amount of everyone else Yeah.
	into NATO even though we actually have an international agreement we're all
	Right.
	supposed to pay 2% you're paying 3.6 and most countries are paying 0.9%.
	How about this? When we pay for our own stimulus bills, which I have a problem
	with that too by the way, I have a problem with a stimulus bill because I
	think there is a reason for small businesses right we need to support
	businesses so that people don't lose their jobs. We need to delineate between
	those people who had to shut down their restaurants, who had to shut down their
	place of business because the government said you are no longer business
	Everyone else, don't patronize their business.
	We need to delineate between that and the airlines who are going to be requiring a bailout within the next two years anyway.
	No, no, no, no, no.
	You guys don't get it.
	Only the people we directly and acutely affected get any money.
	So I do think it's important to note that.
	One is crony capitalism, and one is an appropriate purview of government if they see this as a national.
	Yeah, and we shouldn't treat Boeing the same way we treat the nail salon down the street.
	Exactly.
	Yeah, it's a very different thing.
	Exactly.
	Too big to fail?
	Sorry, don't believe it.
	I believe that Southwest and these other airlines who haven't required bailouts will step up and American Airlines should cease to exist.
	Big fan of airlines, are ya?
	Big fan of airlines.
	Big fan of big banks.
	Big fan of health insurance industries.
	These are the industries.
	Big fan of big energy.
	These are the industries and companies that have been bailed out time after time after time.
	And guess what?
	There haven't been nearly as many new competitors.
	You can't compete with a never-ending supply of federal funds.
	We need to delineate between that and the people who've been directly affected because the government effectively shut down their business.
	Here's something else.
	No one wants to talk about this, but since it's morning and I don't have to go by show map, I'm just, you know, I can get in trouble.
	We don't pay back China's debt until they fix this.
	Yeah.
	You know what?
	What is it, 1.2 trillion?
	No.
	Sorry.
	Not saying we're never going to pay it, but you know what?
	You should give us a discount.
	You should give the whole world a discount, by the way, for lying about this, for being dishonest, for not telling people what was actually happening.
	And NATO, let's say, you know what, NATO?
	We're paying 3.6%.
	The international agreement is 2%.
	The average, I believe, is somewhere between 1 to 1.3%.
	What most nations pay, we pay 3.6%.
	We say, guess what?
	We're just going to pay the average that everyone else pays until they step up.
	Right there.
	You're talking about anywhere from $500 billion to $1.5 trillion.
	Let's start rearranging this here.
	Let's stop footing the bill for the rest of the world.
	Just like the rest of the world is looking to us for some kind of a cure right now, and who do we look to?
	Not the government, but private industry.
	And the rest of the world benefits from our private industry.
	Same thing?
	You know what?
	You don't get to subsidize drugs.
	This is true.
	Sometimes you can order name-brand drugs from Canada, and they're cheaper than the United States.
	Why?
	Because all the costs are burdened here in the United States.
	It costs more here.
	It's subsidized abroad, and so they don't have to pay as much.
	Guess what?
	If you want to use American-made or American-manufactured drugs invented here in the United States from American pharmaceutical companies, you pay a premium.
	Our people pay less.
	Off the bat, you pay more.
	Yeah.
	This is the America First that I can be on board with.
	Not tariffs, not trying to shut down global free enterprise or trade on a fair level, which isn't happening with China most of the time, but this idea that we shouldn't be footing the bill for everyone else right now.
	I don't know.
	Is it me?
	Is it me?
	You guys let me know, but I see it and I go, hold on a second.
	How about we cut some funding to NATO?
	How about we tell China to go sit on a wire brush and rotate until they decide to figure their crap out?
	They're not going to be holding our debt.
	And let's make people pay for the drugs that we create and invent.
	Same thing right now with coronavirus.
	This is what happens.
	People say, oh, it's cruel.
	Really?
	Why isn't it cruel for you to have suckled at our teat for decades?
	These people brag about socialized health care just like they brag about having a smaller military budget.
	It works here.
	It works here.
	Why did it work there?
	Sure.
	Well, you have a smaller military budget, Canada.
	Why?
	Because we foot the bill.
	And then they look to us for health care.
	No, no, we shouldn't subsidize the world.
	We shouldn't fund the world for health care.
	Why should you all benefit from our private health care industry and instead why you simultaneously
	demonize it between every single election?
	I do think that there's an incredible amount of people who realize the dichotomy between
	saying hey, Canada, you want to benefit from being our neighbor from all of the military
	prowess we have.
	The collateral benefit that Canada gets from being next to America is people don't can't
	even imagine economically, militarily, all the different things that benefit Canada.
	And sure, okay, it's fine.
	You guys want to criticize us?
	Hey, we're definitely the land of dissent, right?
	We have a free media.
	Everything exists to be able to cross fight.
	They don't have it as much.
	They're going to shut you down on hate speech.
	But the whole point of the matter is just there's a simple list.
	Want the benefits?
	You're going to have to pay for it.
	And when I say pay for it, I don't necessarily mean money, per se.
	It could be support.
	It could be being on board with certain policies that we have.
	It could be on board with punishing other countries that shouldn't be.
	The number of times where Canada has diverged when we've said, hey, we don't like those civil rights abuses in this country.
	We're going to put sanctions on them.
	And the rest of the world goes, oh, I can't believe I can't believe you would punish those socialists for murdering dissidents and LGBTs.
	I can't believe you would continue to do that, America.
	Just get on board.
	Just say, hey guys, if you want the benefits, you've got to take the rest.
	You know, it's a great example.
	We do have to get to it, but a great example is the sort of, if you look at the chasm between people being offended by Chinese virus versus the people of China.
	So the American media is like, you can't say that because there's going to be violence committed against Chinese Americans, which of course none of us want to see.
	But then you look at people who are trying to circumvent the Chinese government and the censorship and they're going, tell the world!
	Tell the world that it's the Chinese virus because they harmed us.
	These people are upset with government.
	Keep in mind that guy who said, Donald Trump, don't trust China, China is asshole.
	That guy was, he was not North American.
	He was Chinese.
	This is how they feel about the government.
	Empathizing with the Chinese people requires ridiculing the Chinese government, because they are... It is amazing that this has been allowed to go unchecked, and you have all these economists go up and say, well, China's the next great superpower of the world.
	You know what?
	Only if good people don't stop them and do something, because there has to be somewhere Where it stops and people are no longer abused by one of the most oppressive regimes that we can think of in modern mankind.
	Let's not act as though American workers in a Ford plant are on the same playing field as the kids working at an Apple factory.
	It's not fair.
	It's not right.
	We need to do something as Americans.
	Do we have on the line, I believe we have right now, our guest for the show, Mahmoud Al-Mahmoud, and he is the Director of Public Relations at ISIS.
	Mahmoud, are you there, sir?
	I am here, Stephen.
	Thank you for having me.
	Good to see you again.
	Thank you.
	I'm glad to see you, sir.
	You look bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.
	From where are you calling right there?
	I'm seeing some boxes behind you.
	Yeah, we're doing quarantine, you know, here in Anbar province.
	We've been deemed by Anbar province to be non-essential.
	Okay.
	So, here I am.
	Well, it looks more like somewhere where you would be lined up for a police photo.
	What are those lines in the white wall?
	It looks like the usual suspects.
	Well, you know, There are blurred lines, for sure.
	Pretty sure.
	Okay.
	Let me ask you this, Mahmoud.
	How are you adapting right now with ISIS to the new social distancing guidelines?
	Well, Stephen, I'll be honest.
	You know, quarantine bears a very close resemblance to my actual life.
	Okay.
	So, in many ways we've been in quarantine since 2003 or so.
	So, you know, being in this subterranean bunker is kind of life as usual.
	Okay, all right.
	Do you have any big plans for the quarantine, then?
	Do you have any plans when you're done with it?
	Yeah, you know, trying to do a little bit of spring cleaning, for sure.
	I've been into this Tiger King.
	Have you seen Tiger King?
	I have.
	I have been watching Tiger King.
	That is not emblematic of all of the United States, by the way.
	Okay, because I was like, that's pretty cool, you know?
	Well then, in that case, we are all Joe Exotic.
	Pretty much everyone here is like that.
	Yes, yes, yes.
	Yeah, I would hope so.
	I would like to think that, you know?
	Do you think Carol killed her husband and fed her to the tigers?
	Well, I'll be honest with you, we're trying to recruit Carol Baskin.
	So I'll just leave it there, I don't need, you know... She's so effective, she's so effective.
	Like Haida, trying to get in on the bidding wars.
	Okay.
	What do you guys do, though?
	You know, we're talking about social distancing.
	What do you do as far as social distancing?
	I think you froze there for a second.
	Social distancing, you know, also washing hands.
	It's a little bit different there in your culture because you eat from the communal bowl and, you know, we had a toilet paper shortage, but you guys don't necessarily use toilet paper.
	So how does it affect people like you in respect to ISIS?
	You know, in some ways we do have it easier, Stephen, if that's what you're getting at.
	It's absolutely true.
	And so we will see how it's going.
	Do you have enough toilet paper over there?
	No, we don't.
	That's the problem.
	And I live with a dog.
	I know you guys aren't big fans of that.
	And she loves toilet paper.
	That's her thing.
	So it's the worst living being you could possibly have in the house with you during this quarantine.
	I'll take care of her.
	No, no, that's not good at all.
	Oh, OK.
	I see what you're doing there.
	You're trying to... Well, look, two can do that.
	I can drink from my mug.
	I like how he's advertising.
	Egypt?
	What is he, is he advertising for a tourist spot for Egypt?
	Have you not been to Egypt?
	Oh, it's lovely this time of year.
	Have we?
	Yeah.
	Well, we're also, we also were planning on going to Medina, but that had to be canceled very recently because, you know.
	You can't be too safe.
	You know, the, the large groups right now.
	Right.
	It's, it's a, it's a, it's very, it's very tough.
	Well, although I think more people are actually trampled going to Medina and Mecca on an annual basis than the coronavirus.
	So, you know, you take some, you give some.
	A bit different.
	Like so many things in life, you know, it's a balance of risks.
	Yes, it is a balance of risks, and I appreciate you letting us know that.
	Hey, we do have to get going here, but Mahmoud, what's your hope or what advice do you have to Americans as the public relations director for ISIS?
	Yeah, you know, well, I think that the end is near.
	As I often say.
	Okay, okay.
	That's good to know.
	Yeah, hopefully it's something where we can find a lot of common ground.
	Right.
	And then we can get back to where you're scared of me.
	Okay, all right.
	Thank you very much.
	Well, Mahmoud Al Mahmoud, stay safe.
	Use your hose on your left hand.
	Don't eat from the communal bowl.
	We will see you next time.
	Thank you, sir.
	Noted, Steven.
	Noted.
	Thank you for having me.
	All right, that's enough.
	I don't want him to trace our call.
	Ah, Mahmoud El-Mahmoud.
	Showing the softer side of ISIS.
	What a guy.
	He's just, he's a lover.
	Were you about to say something there, uh, QuarterBlackCarrot?
	You looked like at one point you were leaning in.
	No?
	No, I was just listening.
	Oh, you were listening.
	I'm very, I'm very intent.
	I wanted to know what you were saying.
	Hey, look, CNN!
	Look, another guy talking from his, from his, uh, closet.
	Literally.
	This is remarkable to me, I will say this.
	These production companies, you look at CNN, you look at these late night hosts, they're so used to having, I think Leno had 147 employees, I know it's over 100 for every late night show, it's well over 100 for most of these shows at CNN, not to mention writers, producers, segment producers.
	And what happens is, they have all this money, and it goes away because of a self-quarantine, and so, they just decide, well, just turn on your iPhone, like, you can all, there's a middle, there's a middle ground.
	Look at what we're doing here.
	They don't have anything?
	This is what happens.
	This is the great equalizer.
	When there's some kind of a pandemic going on, we can create better, more polished content than all of CNN.
	Think about that for a second.
	This is more, this show, you know what, when people think of Lotto with credit, you don't think polish?
	As a matter of fact, what we told you guys when we said, Mug Club Quarantine Month, everything's going to be free, in front of the paywall, plus more content than ever because we want to interact with you.
	What we told you was, listen, there's going to be less polish.
	I didn't anticipate this!
	I didn't anticipate someone broadcasting from George Michael's Port-A-Potty in Los Angeles in a public park.
	I like how, you know, what do they say?
	You don't have to run the fastest, you just have to run faster than the last guy.
	Right.
	And that's the last guy, CNN.
	Yes, that is the last guy.
	It's the race to the middle.
	And this is also why they're putting pressure on YouTube and all these sort of new media companies, right?
	Because what happened is they had this sort of, not a monopoly, but a few major news networks, right?
	They were on cable, that's what people had.
	And they had this kind of classic corporate budget cost structure.
	And now they can't afford it.
	And it's a race to the middle.
	They're trying to downgrade.
	They're trying to cut down costs.
	We're building up, right?
	So they're coming down from 140 employees to maybe, I don't know, like 90.
	And we're going from 8, 12, 15, hopefully one day maybe 20 employees, you know, join Mug Club.
	$30 off this month.
	It's quarantine.
	We're not making anything off of YouTube.
	So we're intersecting there at the middle.
	So what happens?
	NBC, Vox, Universal.
	They try to step in and get YouTube to shut down competitors.
	You have ABC, is it ABC Disney?
	ABC Disney.
	They step in and they say, you know what, we're going to try and flag and copyright and shut down people who criticize our content.
	Then they start running more advertising dollars on YouTube so that they can manipulate what gets seen more, what's considered advertiser friendly, and it still doesn't work.
	People are not tuning in.
	So there is a silver lining here right now that I think we've learned the media is not the same.
	Well, we've known this for a while, but it's on showcase right now, 24 hours a day.
	They're not the people that we thought they were.
	They don't care about you, and most of all, and most offensively of all, they're incredibly lazy.
	And right now, they're running an ad for St.
	Jude, that's nice, but I've been looking at... it's been nothing but like gold.
	You would think that people who watch CNN spend their days crapping themselves, buying precious metals all day, putting an awning up on their camper.
	What's the median age down to now?
	93?
	Hey, don't knock it.
	Come on, man.
	Hey, those 93-year-olds don't have long.
	93-year-olds who are at an airport.
	By the way, what are CNN's ratings right now?
	Because no one's at the airport.
	That's true.
	Are they accounting for that?
	No one's in the dentist's office lobby where it's just playing non-stop.
	They've got to be way down.
	That's the greatest compliment Anderson Cooper has received.
	That guy has actually aged pretty well.
	Are you turning on the gas?
	Okay.
	That's what they have on Rotten Tomatoes.
	That's their one-star review.
	It's like every office you go in just has it playing in the background.
	You're like, it's so low quality it can be the Yanni of the elevator.
	It's your muzak for the lobby, visually.
	I couldn't tell you a Yanni song.
	Ooh, I've got them all.
	What?
	Give me a Yanni song.
	Actually, so, you know I play violin at a lot of weddings and piano and stuff.
	I didn't know you did at weddings.
	Yeah, so I've actually played at like- You're a very well-paid lawyer.
	50 weddings?
	I mean, but I've been doing it since I was a kid.
	Like, my sister and I would, you know, every other weekend would play at weddings and, you know, make some money and all that stuff.
	Pre-bar.
	Yeah, pre-bar.
	And I've had a couple themed weddings that I've had to play at, and one of them was, like, all Yanni songs, one was Enya, one was Guitar Hero songs.
	It's funny, I was gonna say Enya.
	What does that even mean?
	Guitar Hero.
	Like, yeah, I had to play songs from Guitar Hero 1, because that was how this couple met.
	They met playing Guitar Hero.
	I don't like that.
	I don't like that story.
	I don't like it when people, they get cute with their wedding, like, we like Star Wars!
	So they dress up like Chewbacca and R2, or like, we're indie, so they wear Converse All-Stars.
	This is the one opportunity where you have to follow the tradition, class it up.
	It was not classy.
	Meeting a guitar hero, it's no Pride and Prejudice.
	No story for the ages.
	I mean, no one was like, oh, amazing, I look back fondly on Franz Ferdinand.
	No, not great.
	You know what's crazy?
	What?
	When was the last time we did $30 off?
	The last time we did $30 off?
	Gosh, I don't know.
	Of course, students, veterans get it, but now everyone gets $30 off.
	It was a Vox Adpocalypse.
	It was a reminder, because when you were talking about where all the different folks were having to deal with the media and whether they can trust these things and how this platform goes around, The only way it happens is Mug Club.
	Yeah, that's true.
	And that was the only way we had it back then.
	And thank you so much to everyone who's joined.
	Again, we're doing this because this is how we can give back.
	We have decided to take an acceptable risk, and everyone here is quarantined just at the office and just at home, washing our hands, hand sanitizer everywhere.
	Though, I'm gonna be honest, I'm not really at, none of us here at significant risk, so we're not exactly kamikaze-ing Pearl Harbor, like, going out in our shield.
	No, I mean, he might.
	But the point is, it's not that big a deal.
	And we figured we could serve you more.
	And a lot of people out there, we notice more people are watching in the morning, the evening shows in the morning.
	Because you get up, you aren't necessarily going to work, and people are listening to the show at home.
	And so we thought, OK, three times a week, let's do this where we can interact with folks.
	And I don't know if we have the chat at the Blaze, by the way, for people who are looking to use it.
	Go to blaze.com slash TV.
	Or blazeTV.com.
	You can chat there.
	The only issue, we tried to get this up and running immediately, you can't put in your username yet.
	So in your comment, just put your name and colon, and that should be fixed here within the next two weeks, because we wanted to make sure that we had the chat up there.
	We don't want to do super chat on YouTube, because not only do they not pay us, but then they can spy on us.
	Right.
	So we'll be doing that, doing that, talking to people, getting some interesting questions from the biggest fans.
	Get off the TikTok.
	Do you want some inside baseball before we go to the last story of the day?
	Speaking of media, did I ever tell you the story about when I went into a meeting at MSNBC?
	No.
	I can talk about this now, right?
	I don't know.
	I was with Fox News for four and a half years, okay?
	And what happened was, initially, my contract was like six months.
	So it was every six months, every six months, every six months.
	And I found out they would do this to a lot of the younger contributors.
	By young, I mean I was 20.
	Maybe I was 21.
	And the only other guy who was my age was Steve Doocy's son, who basically showed up drunk all the time to do some report.
	He was like, ugh.
	They'd be like, hey, Steve Doocy, Pete Doocy, Steve Doocy's son, what's going to be going on in there on the street?
	You send your own guy.
	That's a horrible report.
	My dad hosts.
	So I was very young outside of him.
	My point is, I don't really think he counts.
	And then every six months, we'd have to sit down for renewal, and sometimes it would lapse for like two weeks.
	So at one period, it had lapsed for two weeks, and I was still appearing.
	And I met with some executives at MSNBC.
	And I didn't really know I was meeting with them.
	I just thought I was meeting with someone who was doing things.
	So I hope I'm fine here.
	It's not a violation.
	Because the contract had lapsed!
	I had no interest in Going to MSNBC.
	But Alex Wagner was there?
	Alex Wagner?
	I have never used your name!
	So now you have the inside scoop.
	She's there, she does like the World's Greatest Circus.
	It's a show on Showtime now or something.
	Very liberal.
	She was a host at MSNBC.
	So I go in, some executives are there, and they were talking about Rick Perry.
	Because this was back in the primary, you know, it was still Rick Perry and Mitt Romney.
	And they said, we heard that Rick Perry is gay.
	Do you think he's gay?
	And I said, I don't know.
	What are you talking about?
	I don't know.
	And they were going through this.
	I have a source that says it's a very high possibility.
	And so everyone just kind of got quiet.
	And I said, well, Hillary Clinton's a dyke.
	And I said, well, I have a source that says that.
	So I'm just going to say that.
	Yeah.
	They said, well, what's your source?
	I said, what's your source?
	I was very childish.
	They said, well, our source is anonymous.
	I said, well, mine's anonymous.
	And then she was talking about, Alex Wagner was there and she was talking about, she's like,
	yeah, you know, I studied at the Sarbonne and speaks French.
	And she says, so I speak French and some international story. And so I just said, Oh, I
	just said, Yes.
	She responded for everyone.
	She didn't even say oui.
	I called her out.
	Maybe she does now.
	She didn't speak a word of French.
	She could have at least pulled out oui.
	Needless to say, they had no interest in me working at MSNBC.
	But it was just remarkable to me.
	Oh, the sorbonne.
	And she was pronouncing French words the way someone who wasn't French but wanted to sound French would pronounce them.
	So, you know, we'll do this.
	A little bit of inside baseball every now and then, because hopefully it's not a legal violation of contract.
	And I enjoyed my time at Fox News.
	I didn't so much enjoy that meeting at MSNBC.
	Too late to worry about it.
	Too late to worry about it.
	Hey, let's show.
	It's Sanjay Gupta and John King.
	They all hate Trump.
	Those are actually the areas where we've got to be paying very close attention to, not saying that they're going to be fine.
	They haven't had many cases yet.
	They're going to be fine.
	Areas with few infections can turn into big fires without social distancing.
	It is a fundamental difference, John, between what we were hearing just last week, this idea that maybe those places could start to be open.
	First the disease, now the fires.
	Pay more attention to them.
	First of all, John, just practically speaking, it's really about the number of people per capita Oh, good!
	Thank you!
	Okay, that's good.
	Okay, that's good.
	... the total number of people.
	Whenever you look at these maps, think about this per capita.
	New York obviously much more densely populated than some of these other areas.
	But number two, we haven't been doing testing there yet.
	We really don't know how significant the problem is.
	Don't you notice how he goes like, the numbers should matter per capita.
	Like, oh, that's some good news because per capita we're doing far better than these other
	countries as far as death rate.
	But we really don't have enough testing.
	But hold on a second.
	Our overall infection rate is higher than anywhere else because we have an obscene amount
	of testing right now.
	We're testing a lot of people.
	And we're also not lying about our testing.
	Let's be really clear about that.
	We're not like, no one have Corona.
	Are you sure about that?
	No.
	Yeah.
	I do realize I thought last night that I was going through some stuff kind of getting ready for this and well you know just doing the kind of browse looking on various social media but also reading news sites and not a single article talks about the lack of testing as it relates to other countries.
	Every single one of them is criticizing the United States, saying there's not enough testing
	here, 300 plus million people, you should have more tests, etc.
	Here, it's a failure of the government, of Trump, etc.
	But not a single one of them is posting about other countries that have even worse systems.
	They don't have any tests at all.
	But there were actually a few people on social media who I thought, they're just people I've
	either known from high school or other places, who just said, look, I don't know what's going
	on, but I can tell you this.
	I don't believe that there are these other countries that have zero numbers right now
	that are being reported by the media as having zero or single digit cases of infection, not
	even death.
	And yet, we're saying there's no number of testing that's happening there.
	So you're telling me those are the numbers we should believe?
	The only number you can really trust, and you still can't trust it, the most accurate number we have is the total number of deaths.
	Not even the mortality rate as a percentage of the disease, because we don't know how many people have it, and now they're determining that more people have it who are asymptomatic.
	Again, you hear that, you go, oh, okay, so more people have it than we realize.
	They're asymptomatic or it's very mild.
	And they go, that means they can transmit it!
	Well, hold on a second, let's look at the bright side.
	That means that the death rate is much lower.
	You guys were saying 6%, 5%, 3%.
	It's well under 1%, particularly for people who are under the age of 80 years old.
	Well, yeah, and those are the only things we have to compare it to.
	We can only compare it to how other countries are handling this exact thing.
	So, like, we can look back and see other pandemics and how other presidents may have handled Those, but the only other people who are handling this one are the other countries around us.
	So it depends on what you compare it to.
	And it's remarkable to me when they compare us to South Korea.
	It's like, hold on a second.
	South Korea is a country, first off, they didn't trust the intel from China.
	They got on it really quickly.
	They actually did farm it out to private testing.
	And by the way, some of these tests that were created by private companies were offered to the CDC, FDA, but they weren't approved.
	Only the CDC's kits were approved by the FDA.
	The ones that go into your brain.
	Do you have corona?
	I don't know, but I think my brain has a sword in it.
	It's just a problem.
	And so South Korea had privatized testing, and the government basically docks their citizens.
	So if you are willing to do that, this is something we need to take into account.
	Should your data be given over to the government, and should they then have the right to post it publicly so people know where to avoid corona hotspots?
	Let's be really clear.
	This does matter.
	It doesn't mean that you don't care about lives.
	if you care about the lives of every American thereafter who basically dissolves all of
	their rights to a government.
	Because imagine if this were to happen under a government with like a 20% death rate, which
	is what they always predicted when they were predicting like a global pandemic, you know,
	like contagion.
	They were talking 20, 30, 40% death rate, and you're talking about like a third of the
	world being infected.
	So imagine if we were in an actual pandemic, how quickly your rights would go away.
	And not just because of the government violently seizing them.
	Donald Trump really hasn't been doing that.
	It's because of the people demanding it, and the media demanding it.
	If you don't demand that there is a federal lockdown that puts all businesses out of work as we know them right now, you, for some reason, don't care about the people who are being lost to corona.
	Which, by the way, if you calculate it all up, still less at this point than flu deaths.
	We need to take all of these things into account.
	And by the way, we don't have time for the commercials because we're running a little bit late.
	So Black Rifle Coffee, they are still in business right now.
	It's delicious, but now it's cold.
	Because we've been sitting here for an hour and ten.
	Yeah, but the Black Rifle, delicious.
	This is my favorite blend.
	It's their Vintage Roast.
	BlackRifleCoffee.com slash Crowder.
	Enter in the promo code Crowder and you will get 20% off your first order.
	We really do appreciate it.
	You know who needs all of that?
	It's the people who are stealing coffee from their office and they can't get it anymore.
	Just let Black Rifle send it straight to your house.
	Absolutely right.
	Easy.
	You could also trade.
	Trade it.
	If the crap really goes down, it's a commodity that can be traded.
	Everclear and Black Rifle coffee.
	And guns.
	So you can take other people's Black Rifle coffee in Everclear.
	That's really what's most important.
	Again, the hashtag is we're going to have to get going here tonight.
	We do have a show, which is we have life advice as well as a meat segment that's going to be going up tonight.
	Tomorrow we have Razor Fist on the show, just like a Thursday show.
	And the promo code is quarantine.
	You get $30 off.
	All of this, of course, is going to be provided to you in front of the paywall for the month of April.
	It's Mug Club Quarantine Month and check out Crowder Bits.
	Subscribe there because there might be some exclusive content.
	We really do appreciate it.
	And of course Mug Club people who've already joined are the ones who make this possible.
	Let's get to the last story right now because nothing's been changing in the news.
	They've been complaining.
	about President Trump's really bad job, right?
	This is what they're trying to run with.
	So I think we have a clip right now about Pelosi putting Donald Trump on blast, if you look at the headlines over there at Huffington Post or Salon.
	They put him on blast!
	Oh no!
	The most powerful man in the world is really, I mean, he has to deal with John King doing a Skype hit with female Skeletor.
	He's quivering in his boots.
	Quivering and InstaKovas aren't a sponsor yet, but they will be soon.
	Let's roll clip three.
	Are you saying that his downplaying ultimately cost American lives?
	Yes, I am.
	I'm saying that because when he made, the other day when he was signing the bill, he said, just think, 20 days ago, everything was great.
	No, everything wasn't great.
	We had nearly 500 cases and 17 deaths already.
	And in that 20 days, because we weren't prepared, we now have 2,000 deaths and 100,000 cases.
	This matters because of the content.
	No, everything wasn't okay.
	We had 500 cases and 17 deaths.
	I don't have the source in front of me, but I'm pretty sure that's fewer deaths than people from toasters in that period of time.
	I think more people have choked on toast.
	Yeah, more people have choked on toast.
	That's why they're- Are you gonna sponsor?
	The bread-darkening machine.
	The bread-darkening box.
	Yeah, the bread-darkening box.
	T-O-A-S-T dot com.
	20% off.
	Enter in the promo code TOAST.
	The reason why most people looked at that and said, OK, a couple hundred infected, 17 deaths, that's really not serious.
	It's because statistically, it's really not at that point.
	And that's why it was the left.
	It was people like you, Pelosi, and people in New York who were saying that it wasn't a big deal and actually discouraged people from actively leaving because they thought there was a threat posed.
	If you don't believe me, here's a clip.
	At least clip four, yeah.
	The important thing for New Yorkers to know is that in the city currently, their risk is low.
	And our city preparedness is high.
	And so we know that this virus can be transmitted from one individual to another, but that it's typically people who live together.
	That there's no risk at this point in time, we're always learning more, about having it be transmitted in casual contact.
	Nah, the gray hair Tulsi wore it better.
	I just feel like that information was wrong.
	I just pulled out my earphones.
	No wait, now I can hear.
	There you go.
	It's live!
	Just wiggle it.
	It's live, bitch!
	Oh, this is live, come in.
	We're doing it for y'all!
	This also matters because the World Health Organization downplayed it taking advice
	from China early on, saying that there was no evidence, I think we have these as overlays,
	of human contact.
	And they recommended against travel restrictions in January.
	Here's another fast fact.
	During that period, Donald Trump finished creating a Chinese virus task force, January 19th, less than a week after the World Health Organization said there was no evidence of human-to-human transmission.
	Then he banned, Trump banned travel to China, this is important to note, which Biden accused him of being xenophobic for doing.
	That's clip five.
	This is no time for Donald Trump's record of hysteria xenophobia, hysterical xenophobia.
	This is no time for xenophobia?
	Here's the thing, I don't really, I don't know what xenophobia means.
	From what I understand it's the fear of everything.
	It's the fear of anything that's not familiar.
	Yes, the fear of anything that's different.
	And I think that everybody has a certain level of xenophobia than if you're talking about being introduced to something new.
	In other words, people are cautious no matter what it is.
	If you're walking on new ground in the forest, you're like, I don't know, is there going to be a bear trap?
	I have no idea.
	You don't know.
	I always look for bear traps, because wolverines, some guys get caught in them, and then they chew off their own leg and they chase down the person who laid the bear trap because they tracked down the scent, and I wrote a short story about it in grade school.
	I failed miserably, mainly because I just ripped off Jurassic Park and replaced the Velociraptors with a wolverine.
	The point is, check for bear traps!
	It's a concern.
	It's a concern.
	Please.
	And don't plagiarize Steven Spielberg if you're in school.
	They catch on to that sort of thing.
	Ladies and gentlemen, this whole coronavirus is just a cover-up for the bear trap.
	It's just a cover-up for Big Bear Trap.
	They're everywhere.
	Big Bear Trap.
	You can get them at Menards.
	Save more money at Menards.
	Right?
	Isn't that a commercial?
	No?
	I have no idea.
	Maybe it's a Midwestern thing.
	And I think I confused it with Gander Mountain.
	Gander Mountain is the outdoor one.
	The point is, if you need a bear trap, there's a way to find it on the dark web.
	Or, you can walk into an Ace Hardware, you can also find them.
	You don't really need the dark web.
	Or a VPN.
	Ace Hardware.
	So, there are multiple ways to skin a cat.
	This is remarkable to me.
	Donald Trump cut down travel to China, right?
	Put a ban in place, which they accused him of being racist doing that.
	This was, keep in mind, at a time when the World Health Organization, who by the way, when they had their conversations, excluded Taiwan, which to me is very telling.
	Did you see that video of the World Health Organization, the representative there?
	He was being interviewed on Skype and he just acted like he didn't hear the question regarding Taiwan.
	He said, yeah I don't know if we can bring it up or we can bring it up tonight.
	He said, I didn't hear you cut out.
	She said, well let me ask you again.
	He said, no let's move on to the next question.
	Wow.
	Wow.
	So this idea that the World Health Organization, by the way, that these sort of international
	governmental bodies have no bias is completely untrue because they were saying there was
	no risk at this point.
	Donald Trump said, you know what?
	I think there's some risk.
	We're going to have a task force.
	We're going to ban travel to China.
	I said, no, no, no, there's no risk.
	And then Joe Biden said, hey, that's racist.
	And now they're blaming him for not having done enough.
	And that is probably why our last fast fact here, uh, Donald Trump is gaining and actually eclipsing Joe Biden due to the crisis.
	More people approve of president Trump's handling of the crisis than ever before.
	And Joe Biden is not doing so well.
	And I don't mean that he's not just doing well in the polls.
	I mean, he's not doing well in that Corona should be the least of his worries.
	He should be concerned about that cranial microbe that, was it cat pee or cat poop in Brazil that makes people really aggressive?
	The soccer players?
	Whatever's happening there, there's something short-circuiting in Biden's brain.
	Hey, it's really hard for the guy.
	All he has is challenging people to push-ups, but he has to stay so far away from them right now.
	Right.
	No one to challenge.
	And he can't do push-ups on the ground because then he has a problem with the contact.
	Yeah, it's terrible.
	Also, he can't do push-ups because he's incredibly weak.
	It's hard out there for a Biden.
	I mean, he would actually probably fare more poorly than women at PT in the Marines.
	At this point, yeah.
	At this point.
	Are you looking over there?
	Are we bringing anything up?
	We have that clip of this person avoiding the question.
	Oh, we do?
	Okay, let's bring up this clip.
	This is a representative of the World Health Organization.
	Again, and not to be a sore spot, but you and I, we've talked about Taiwan.
	Taiwan kind of been left out in the cold here, and it's relevant.
	Here's the World Health Organization, I don't remember his name, representative, playing it off like he didn't hear the question.
	The WHO considers Taiwan's membership.
	Hello?
	I couldn't hear your question.
	Let me repeat the question.
	Let's move to another one then.
	I'm actually curious on talking about Taiwan as well, on Taiwan's case.
	What?
	What?
	And he closes it.
	Wow.
	Wow.
	And keep in mind, I don't think this is a conspiracy or theory at this point where you
	say China has not been, the Chinese government, they've not been honest or forthright about
	what's been happening with the coronavirus, and the World Health Organization has not
	treated all nations equally.
	They've been carrying the water of the Chinese government, not the Chinese people.
	I don't know why the Taiwanese couldn't have a membership.
	You might know more about that.
	Doesn't it seem like the Taiwanese should at least be involved?
	Well, the big deal, the nutshell is that China doesn't recognize Taiwan as a separate nation.
	It recognizes it only as a rogue state that is part of China.
	So any national or international organization that recognizes Taiwan instantly goes on the China shit list.
	Right.
	And they just say, look, if you recognize Taiwan as its own country, you're dead to us.
	And so the WHO is an international organization that receives support from another number of countries and of the big five, China is one of them.
	And so when China says, hey, we're going to stop cooperating with you or funding you or whatever it may be, who knows what these conversations are like.
	But we do know what they could be like because it's the same public conversation that China has all the time.
	If you recognize Taiwan, you're dead to us.
	So we know what's happening here.
	And that reporter had an opportunity to ask so much.
	In a manner of speaking, she didn't really get the opportunity.
	Well, right.
	I mean, set aside our political differences, China-Taiwan, in this pandemic, are we going to care about Taiwan?
	And somebody was going through a tunnel with their Skype account.
	And by the way, at the very least, it's relevant because of the way the government would be handling it, right?
	Taiwan, they would be operating autonomously from China, certainly how they're dealing with this in their country.
	Well, they would be operating autonomously.
	They would be getting support from a lot of their own supporters, which includes the United States.
	They have a different government.
	But if you think about the places that are highly at risk, we're all concerned about Korea because it's so connected there to China, just across on another peninsula.
	Taiwan and China, the number of flights between those two countries, I don't know what they are, but the amount of travel directly or indirectly in that hemisphere that includes Taiwan is extraordinary.
	So when you think about a place that's going to need support and certainly wants to know does it have the support of the World Health Organization and they can't even get an answer, it's a big concern.
	And keep in mind, the World Health Organization, this is the organization that went with these studies, right?
	These projections.
	If you look at their Twitter, you look at their social media, that 2.5 million Americans would die.
	The idea that the Chinese government did great work and everything that they could to try and contain this virus.
	I don't know if they retweeted it, but certainly the Chinese government did.
	Their foreign minister repeatedly that this was actually a virus created by the American soldiers, by the way.
	And people were responding when Donald Trump responded in kind, calling it the Chinese virus.
	Why does it matter?
	Because they do not get to rewrite history.
	Again, aiming it at the Chinese government, the World Health Organization.
	If you look at the timeline, all of the information that has been fed to the international community from China, World Health has echoed it almost exactly to a T. And then when questioned about Taiwan, again, who was an ally, the United States supports them.
	We recognize them, I believe.
	We certainly understand that they are... Do we officially recognize them?
	It's a complicated issue, but they operate autonomously in a lot of ways, in a way that we would actually be required to provide them with some kind of aid, and we do.
	They cannot even answer the question.
	That should tell you how terrified they are, and how beholden not to the people of China, but to the government of China that they actually are.
	And keep in mind, this is the same organization that ranked the United States, I believe, 36th An international healthcare right next to Slovenia and Colombia.
	So do they have a vested interest in playing down the success of the United States?
	And do they have a vested interest in trying to parrot the messages coming from the Chinese government?
	They certainly have done that.
	They've done that thus far, consistently, and it's something that we need to be concerned with, especially if we are talking about shutting down the American economy, and by proxy, the global economy, as the result of this information which is, by and large, being provided to us by the World Health Care Organization.
	Following the money, following the relationships, it does matter.
	And if we leave you with nothing else right now, we will see you tonight at 9 p.m.
	Eastern.
	It is this, that I understand people care on all different sides.
	I understand that people care.
	They don't want their grandparents to die, neither do I. They don't want people who are at risk to die, neither do I.
	And people on the other side also care when they say, I don't want every friend I know to be unemployed or small business that I know to go under.
	Sure, the big boys may survive because of the never-ending supply of corporate bailouts, but guess what?
	A lot of small businesses will shutter their doors forevermore.
	There is a balance to be had here, and I think the numbers do matter.
	especially the source of those numbers.
	We're talking about the World Health Care Organization.
	The numbers matter for us to balance the risk-reward ratio.
	It doesn't mean that you don't care about any lives lost if you want to prevent damage going forward as effectively as possible, both health-wise and economically.
	This has been Good Morning Mug Club.
	We really appreciate you being with us.
	We'll see you again every night through Thursday, 9 p.m.
	Eastern, and we'll be back here Wednesday morning.
	Good Morning Mug Club at 10 p.m.
	10 a.m.
	is your a.m.
	a.m.
	a.m.
	Bye!
	I'm sorry, I'm not a good singer.
	Then you have him.
	Oh, no, really.
	I think you ought to give him a chance.
	He seems kind of helpless.
	Helplessness is the last thing I am looking for.
	I'm just a man.
	I'm just a man.
	If we're going to spend the rest of our lives together, you must learn not to interrupt.
	The rest of our lives?
	Yes.
	You mean marriage?
	Of course.
	You've got a nerve.
	Got several of them.
	We're all functioning normally.
	Do you realize what you've said?
	I should do.
	It's pounded in my brain often enough, asleep and awake, in the drowsy fantasy moment of every lonely dawn.
	Well, come on.
	What's your answer?
	You've taken my breath away.
	It's just the sudden realization, you see, of the fact that I love you.
	I love you.
	you

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