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Nov. 8, 2016 - Louder with Crowder

06:14:45

TRUMP WINS! Crowder's ALL-STAR Election Live Stream | Louder With Crowder

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Time	Text
	Thank you.
	Stop it.
	You're going to piss off America.
	Election night, live.
	I'm hearing a lot of echo.
	Is my mic on?
	Your mic doesn't sound like it's on.
	My mic's not on.
	This is the worst start ever.
	What happened?
	Plug the...
	Let's see.
	What's happening?
	You should absolutely be fired.
	I should be fired.
	This is...
	All right.
	Pause it.
	Pause it.
	We're going to go dark.
	Go in dark.
	We'll be right back.
	Thank you.
	So make sure you adjust my microphone here, not Gay Jared.
	Bring up the bass, the treble.
	We launched before, and you know what?
	We just had a mic cord go out.
	Out of nowhere.
	Everything was checked?
	Everything was good?
	I don't want to blame on Hillary yet, but the devil is at work.
	The one day, turn down the volume for me.
	It's too loud on my headphones.
	The one day, we just...
	The headphone didn't work?
	Hold on a second.
	I'm notifying everyone now that we are back.
	We are working election night.
	Do we have a cord for Gerald?
	Yeah, we got one.
	All right, well listen, as I start here, just get all this stuff going.
	Yep.
	This is insane.
	This is what's happening in 2016.
	This is a nightmare.
	Happy Election Day, if you want to call it that.
	We have an all-star cast tonight.
	We have Ben Shapiro, Andrew Klavan, Dave Rubin, Anthony Cumia, Gavin McGinnis, Nick DiPaolo, Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton as they call some states.
	By the way, just as we're starting AR15.com, thank you so much for helping to sponsor the show.
	PrepareWithCR.com, we're very much appreciative.
	Of course, we have a big announcement tonight.
	Big announcement.
	It is with a heavy heart that I bring some news to you tonight.
	We'll talk about it a little bit later on, a little bit further in the program.
	Michigan is where we are, not for much longer.
	And we went down and voted today.
	There were no lines, none at all.
	Zero.
	No people were there.
	I was unbelievably surprised.
	And the tone, I would say, was somber.
	And if you look at the exit polls, people are not really thrilled with their choices.
	I know a lot of people online are, you know, you can be enthusiastic, that's fine.
	But the general tone is, people were not happy.
	As a matter of fact, they gave me the I Voted sticker.
	I said, I don't want that.
	It's not something I want to parade around, and everyone at the voting precinct laughed and said, I agree with you.
	I understand where you're coming from.
	So listen, we don't have any drinking game rules tonight because, well, listen, we're going to – you'd probably all be gone by alcohol poisoning by now.
	Look at that.
	It's nice.
	I can fit a whole nice pint in this mug.
	What a wonderful mug.
	Jared is hustling around the studio.
	He's completely screwed up the evening.
	He will be fired because he doesn't have the mics ready or Velcroed down.
	Gerald is here.
	My Gerald Morgan Jr.
	I don't know if his microphone even works yet.
	We'll figure it out and see.
	We're dealing with some mic cord issues.
	So a couple of things.
	Kentucky has already been called and Indiana for Trump.
	So he's got 19 electoral votes.
	There we go.
	Three for HRC. Remember to remember the mid and the low on my mic to switch them out because I don't have that high little girly high estrogen tranny take a dump in North Carolina voice like you.
	That's fair.
	We have Gerald here.
	Is Gerald's mic working?
	Gerald's mic.
	Now it's all working.
	What even happened?
	Wow.
	Would you believe these are the exact same chords we had before?
	Just switched them around?
	Just switched them around.
	So we're not velcroing down my mic?
	We're not fixing this?
	We can.
	We will.
	We'll do that a little bit later.
	So you all voted.
	We all voted.
	Let's all vote a straight Republican ticket.
	Except for one.
	I also had to find some judges here.
	How do you guys do that when you vote?
	Tweet me at us, Crowder.
	And by the way, we're relying on you tonight to call states.
	We're calling all the states tonight.
	We typically actually get these before...
	The networks.
	So we want this to be your election hub tonight.
	Whether you're watching on Facebook or YouTube, we'll actually be calling the states.
	We will be here until this whole thing is called all night.
	All night.
	But tweet us at SCrowder.
	Me, not Gay Jared.
	Tweet any results that you do see in case we miss it.
	So we're always on top of this stuff.
	Gerald, so you voted straight Republican ticket, right?
	Gerald Morgan Jr., rocket scientist, brain surgeon here.
	Well, technically I didn't, just so that I could say I didn't vote straight Republican ticket.
	But I did stay at the top.
	You know, we're in Texas, and Texas is going to be...
	Definitely, it's an obvious choice right now.
	I just don't want Texas to ever look purple or ever have any more Democratic money coming in than it does.
	If it were purple, it would be very much a purple nurple on the United States.
	It really would.
	Dead centered.
	But I did vote for a Libertarian, because when people ask me, did you just vote the ticket, and they use it kind of as a slur, I just want to say no.
	How did you vote for the judges?
	People out there tweet me and ask, how do you vote for the judges?
	We talked about that earlier today.
	You kind of pick an issue that's really important and you use that as a good barometer for judges.
	You can't possibly know everything about all of the candidates.
	Rand Paul wins Kentucky with 60 points.
	Really?
	Yeah.
	That's fantastic.
	No, no.
	He ran his race.
	He didn't win people.
	Not a write-in.
	Oh, I know.
	I know.
	And Jared's like, really?
	That many people wrote in Rand Hall?
	Fantastic!
	I did do that for a second.
	I could have bought an opera and put him in the office that could have gone to the house and they would have given it!
	I have just as good a chance as anyone!
	I, not Jared, have just as good a chance as anyone!
	So, you voted for Libertarian.
	That was a terrible impression on me.
	I know.
	Doing the abominable snowman.
	Okay, it was close.
	Bumbles bounce!
	So, we were...
	This is how, if you're expecting this stream to go any other way, we're going to have an electoral map.
	Hold on a second.
	Let me bring this up.
	The electoral map.
	Naki, Jared can bring it up from my screen.
	Kentucky, Kentucky, Kentucky, and Indiana.
	Where did Hillary get her three votes?
	Vermont.
	Oh, she got Vermont already.
	Well, big surprise there.
	So, there we go.
	19 to 3.
	I found judges who are...
	Stop fondling your mic cap there, Gerald.
	It sounds like you're groping it, okay?
	It's a mic.
	You're talking to it.
	You're not giving it a handy.
	So, what we're...
	Now his mic isn't even working.
	What, are you muting it?
	Yeah, because he's so rude and unprofessional.
	This is a nightmare.
	Yeah, I look for judges who are pro-life because that's kind of a good, it's a good measurement, measuring stick, you know, if they don't list the party.
	And I voted no.
	I don't know about you.
	I voted no on every increased local spending measure.
	I was like, if I have a tax levy for nine million, nope.
	But it's really good for school?
	Nope.
	But we really need nope.
	We want this for the zoos.
	Nope.
	Yeah, yeah, zoos and museums.
	I couldn't give less of a rat's ass.
	I couldn't care less.
	Okay, so you voted for libertarian, Gerald?
	Yes, just one libertarian.
	Okay.
	Just one Libertarian, the rest were Republicans.
	And Jared, would you say, both of you, when you went and voted, was the tone just like, I can't believe we're here?
	Yeah, there were like three people there, and they all hated that they were there.
	They all hated that they were there.
	Yep.
	I just can't believe we're here.
	It really snuck up on me this year.
	Well, you tell me.
	You said you were really nervous before going on.
	I was.
	I was.
	And it wasn't even about technical things, which is everything that's gone wrong so far.
	It was just the election.
	It just made me feel sick.
	Something that felt so much more real about sitting there, penciling it in.
	Like, I hadn't really, like, really perceived, like, thought of, imagined one of these people in office until that moment where I'm trying to bubble in a little scantron.
	I'm like...
	Oh, wow.
	By the way, this is going to bother me.
	I feel like Larry Sanders.
	It's going to bother me.
	I can't get used to it.
	So, yeah, I've been really stressed all day.
	I'm going to say I felt just kind of sick.
	And it's not just about Trump or Hillary, whoever wins.
	It really is just how the country is so divided.
	People are so vitriolic.
	The hate...
	It's just been really, really bad.
	It's been a really bad election season, and I think a lot of people...
	Thank you, Gerald.
	He does have an abominable snowman reach.
	He played football at Notre Dame.
	Just slide that bad boy down, you're good.
	Like that, you mean?
	Yeah, all the way down.
	All the way down?
	All right.
	We're fine now, Gerald.
	Just stop screwing with me.
	I'll get over it.
	We'll get over it.
	So we will be calling states.
	Ben Shapiro's first, Andrew Klavan, and then we're going to cross live streams with Compound Media and Anthony Cumia.
	That's trippy.
	I told you there were going to be a lot of changes here personally for me tonight as well as professionally.
	It's sad.
	There's been a little bit of a sad journey here.
	I am leaving.
	Michigan.
	I'm moving out of the house that I started my life with, with my wife.
	Actually, tonight is the last night.
	We stayed here so we could have the studio for the broadcast for you.
	And I've been sleeping on a mattress on a floor.
	And Nakej came in and he saw me eating beer and ice cream alone because my wife has gone to the new house across the country.
	And it's been a lonely week.
	But the reason for that is we do have a major announcement here at Louder with Crowder.
	And, well, this is the only way to do it.
	We have created a product that is the most deliberate middle finger to the media establishment ever designed.
	Ceramic, two-toned, with a charred rim and hand-etched finish, this product grants those who wield it entry into the most exclusive club in all the universe.
	Aluminium The Louder with Crowder mug club will change the way you view the world, where possibilities are now endless, where barriers are distant memory, and hashtag never daily transforms into a new daily program.
	Fish and Chips, where Stephen is free to be unfiltered, uncensored, and even capable of gross abuses of the FCC guidelines and not Gay Jared's physical body on live broadcast.
	Proudly introducing the Muggler.
	I'm sorry.
	No, yeah, yeah.
	I'm narrating something fancy like...
	Leave it there.
	I'm narrating.
	Proudly introducing the new daily programme, the Louder with Crowder muglub aims to elevate the human experience to both our...
	What the f*** is it with you?
	It's f***ing distracting!
	while I'm trying to narrate a new commercial.
	We need to hire some more professional narrators.
	We do.
	We don't quite have the budget that Apple does.
	No.
	Poor Gerald.
	He's sitting there.
	He doesn't have the headphones.
	He has no idea what's going on.
	But yes, Lauder with Crowder has gone daily.
	Mug Club, right now.
	You can go to lauderwithcrowder.com slash mugclub.
	So, let me give you the intel.
	Our exploratory committee, we always said hashtag NeverDaily.
	We were always hashtag NeverDaily.
	But you asked for it.
	You demanded it.
	And he said, you know, we want to support what you do.
	How do we help?
	Also, by the way, the store is up.
	So your Socialism for Fig shirts, your Crowder the Barbarian shirts, your Lotta with Crowder shirts, the mug, it's all there.
	Lottawithcrowder.com.
	You can go right now.
	Loudowithcrowder.com slash mug club.
	We didn't want to go daily.
	Here's why.
	It was a real struggle because we do all this stuff for free on YouTube.
	Everything is free.
	We want to make sure that we reach out to all these people.
	So let me tell you this.
	Everything that's free right now is still free.
	None of that's being taken away.
	The once a week podcast that you got on iTunes, on YouTube, all the daily articles at loudowithcrowder.com, all the Facebook posts.
	As a matter of fact, you will have more free content.
	The mug club is for people who want the daily show.
	So we're going to do it Monday through Thursday, starting January, and then very soon Monday through Friday.
	We've hired more people.
	We're building a new studio.
	So starting in January, we're doing pre-orders right now.
	Lauder with Crowder will be Daily, and we partnered up with CRTV.com.
	So if you join the Mug Club, you not only get Lauder with Crowder Daily, you not only get...
	Jared's Friday morning breakfast show.
	Jared is going to have his own show right now.
	I can't believe that.
	That's still unbelievably disappointing.
	That should be illegal.
	That should be censored.
	But you will get access to all these people as well.
	Mark Levin, Mark Stein, Michelle Malkin, and some more big names to come.
	I can't tell you them yet, but we're going to round this thing out.
	This kind of firepower has never been assembled with a network before.
	And win, lose, or draw with this media today...
	We've seen in this election how biased they are.
	Just how they are dragging Hillary across the finish line.
	And this is our way to fight back.
	And so this really was the right fit.
	We're louder with Crowder.
	All of this is still the same brand.
	It's free.
	It reaches young people.
	By the way, get Daily Crowder.
	Hashtag Daily Crowder trending.
	Get it out there.
	Tell everybody.
	Crowder Daily.
	I think I said Daily Crowder.
	Hashtag Daily Crowder.
	Hashtag Daily Crowder.
	Get it trending everywhere.
	We partnered with them because...
	They have the infrastructure where, okay, the price is $99 a year.
	If you're a student, it's $69 a year.
	That's less than $6 a month.
	You get this wonderful hand-etched mug.
	You join the mug club.
	It's the only way to get the mug.
	You get access to the Daily Crowder Show, Mark Levin, Mark Stein, Michelle Malkin, Jared's Show.
	There's going to be an app, so you can watch it on your Roku, on your Apple TV, on your Amazon Fire.
	This is going to be the network that you want.
	If you want an alternative, this is it.
	We didn't want to do a Patreon.
	We didn't want to do something where we're saying, can you please donate it?
	We wanted to provide you with so much overwhelming value that you would be able to support us, but also get something that you wanted.
	So for students out there, we know a lot of students who watch us, that's less than $6 a month.
	You get Daily Crowder.
	You get Jared's show, Levin, Stein, Malkin, and we couldn't be happier partnering with CRTV.com.
	So again, that's louderwithcreditor.com slash mug club.
	Pre-orders right now.
	So the monthly rates aren't available until we actually launch the show.
	So it launches in January, but the pre-orders are right now $69 for people who are students out there.
	And what are you going to say, Gerald?
	Where do these people go to sign up for this?
	louderwithcreditor.com slash mug club.
	There you go.
	And you got this wonderful, beautiful mug that even fits a whole pint of beer in here.
	It does.
	I'm pretty happy about it.
	That's the way to go.
	We've been stressing about this.
	And by the way, that's why we had these cords issues, too.
	This studio, everything is emptied, because let me give you an idea as to what my schedule is like.
	We finished tonight's stream.
	Tear down this whole studio.
	Get into a car.
	Drive two days across the country.
	Build up the studio.
	There won't be a show this Thursday.
	There will be the following Thursday through the end of the year.
	It's still going to be once a week.
	You pre-order now.
	And you will get access to the daily show.
	And it's going to be your nightly show.
	Nine o'clock every night.
	It's going to be the nightly show.
	You go to bed with politics, news, but it's fun.
	You know, we don't want to burden you with too much stress, and we've had a lot of people asking for it.
	Listen, if only 5% of people out there, okay, if only 5%, we're not in the business of selling you anything you don't want.
	If you don't want the daily program, you don't need it.
	That's fine.
	But for people who do, if 5% of the people just who watch or download the podcast, that's not including the millions of Facebook fans, Twitter, the half a million YouTube subscribers, if just 5% of the people who download or watch the podcast join the Mug Club at that $79 price, or $99 if you're not a student, it's not even close.
	We can create media the likes of which you've never...
	Young Turks will soil themselves.
	If 10% of the people who get all of this free content that we've provided free of charge for years, if 10% of people subscribe to the Mug Club, we can be just as big and just as effective as any cable outlet, any website out there.
	It's not even close.
	You know, some people have low budget...
	This is what Not Gay Jared and I have done on no budget.
	There's low budget films, and then there's no budget.
	And this has been no budget.
	Can we say these are Home Depot lights?
	Can we say that?
	These are Home Depot lights.
	These are Home Depot lights.
	Well, the funny thing is we had good lights.
	We didn't like how they looked.
	No.
	We were like, ah, they looked too polished.
	Let's go with the Home Depot lights.
	Let's go with the Home Depot lights.
	Well, Jared helped install it.
	He did.
	It took a little longer than I thought, but yeah, we made it happen.
	And when he says we're taking the studio down, or he says he is, it's really, it's me.
	It's Gerald.
	Yeah, it's Gerald.
	They're going to have some beers, and they're going to be like, hey, work, make this thing go away.
	I'm looking here at AR15.com and the Twitter to see what people think about the, wait, where are you moving?
	Hashtag NeverDaily.
	To be honest, the mug could be more premium.
	The mug could be more premium.
	This is a hand-etched mug.
	People who don't realize it's a two-tone, you've got a charred rim.
	It's actually made by someone's hand.
	That's not screen performance.
	This is not screen printed, if you can't see.
	Actually, you can feel that with your fingers.
	And it's extra thick.
	I drink from this every morning.
	I do my tea or my coffee.
	You do a lot of other stuff in there, too.
	Well, we've had some pranks with the mugs.
	We went through this for a long time and tried to find the right fit.
	So listen, like I said, we're not in the business of selling you anything you don't want.
	But my gosh, if you want to keep this going, you want to see what we've done, and you want to take over media, I mean, we've been throttled by Facebook.
	We've been throttled by YouTube.
	Here's the thing.
	We want to stay on YouTube.
	We're going to stay on Facebook.
	We want to fight the left in their own backyard.
	But we're restricted on YouTube.
	We've had issues with Facebook.
	What this does is we're going to archive.
	We get everything up there.
	So you never miss anything.
	And CRTV has the infrastructure so you can watch it wherever you are.
	You never miss anything.
	And you still have all the free content.
	It allows us to create more free content and flip the bird to YouTube and to Facebook.
	It is going to be...
	Yeah, and mostly Tank Uyghur.
	Hey, we should say a big thanks to Brandon, who's worked very hard on the mugs and the shirts and all that stuff.
	I don't know if the address is merch or the address is ladderwithcudder.com slash store.
	We'll find out.
	We'll find out.
	See, ladderwithcudder.com slash store or merch.
	A big thanks to Brandon, who's worked tirelessly to get us these high-quality products.
	We wanted to do this for you tonight, the election night, and we appreciate your support, and we will always do everything we can to push the message forward to create good, fun content.
	None of that changes.
	This just allows us to get that much bigger, and I tell you what, we had this...
	YouTube has restricted nearly all of our videos this week.
	Facebook has been removing posts and throttling posts.
	We're in a legal battle.
	You look at Google, how they're manipulating searches.
	You look at Twitter, what they've been doing.
	They really think that they have us.
	And you, by the way, we're a voice for you.
	They think that they have the right down.
	They've pushed.
	They've prodded.
	They think they have us beat.
	They don't get it.
	They have just been knocking at the gates of hell.
	And with this partnership, I promise you, I promise you, the gates are about to open.
	It is going to be biblical.
	We are going to rain an ungodly firestorm down on YouTube, on CNN, on Young Turks, on Salon, on HuffPo.
	You see what we've done with nothing?
	You help support us.
	We are going to be true to what we've done with you, but watch what we can do.
	It is going to be an absolute holocaust after this election.
	I give you my word, hand to God.
	You've never seen anything like what we're about to do.
	And we're really, really excited about it.
	Years ago, we've talked about this, years ago on YouTube, could have never expressed these things.
	But people are awakening.
	There's a coalition now for the first time where people are going...
	Wow.
	I've never heard this before.
	You tweet out today just how blatantly biased YouTube is with what they're doing with just the homepages, the training topics, everything far left-leaning, far left-endorsing.
	It was ridiculous.
	And here's the thing, people out there, you don't want to remove yourself and put it all behind a paywall.
	You don't want to do that because then you're relegating that territory.
	We're going to use the subscription, the Daily Show, to push back more on the left in the Devil's Playground.
	So...
	Tell you what, they've been poking their finger in our chest for a while looking for a bar fight.
	Merry Christmas!
	You got what you wanted.
	Just help us in this fight.
	Get the Daily Show if you want it.
	Otherwise, go screw yourself.
	Do we have our first guest?
	We are waiting.
	I was trying to connect with him now, but I am getting word that Rubio is getting very close to clenching Florida.
	Rubio is getting very close to clenching Florida.
	Okay, I see that.
	I'm not, for some reason, I'm not getting notifications on my computer when these things are coming in.
	So I don't know what the hell this is about.
	So Rubio is close to clenching Florida.
	Looking at here, looking at the updates right now.
	Any updates, any states that you guys can...
	Let us know.
	Tweet us.
	We'll be looking for them.
	He's close to Florida.
	Ben Shapiro is up next.
	Let me see where he is.
	Jared, you don't have to let that be dead air.
	I don't have to, but I'm texting him too, just because I can.
	Calling you Ben.
	Should give me a second now.
	Trump.
	Someone just sent me...
	Oh, West Virginia Trump.
	Well, obviously.
	So here we go.
	Electoral map, West Virginia Trump.
	I think they sent VV in WV. I was like, VV? He won Virginia?
	This early?
	How could they possibly...
	So West Virginia Trump, Indiana, Kentucky.
	No surprises there.
	Let me show you what really is important.
	If Trump wins, his shot here is he needs to win North Carolina, Florida, Ohio...
	He needs to win those, and then he needs to maintain everything and steal Michigan or Wisconsin.
	That's his best play here.
	Pennsylvania doesn't even seem to be within reach, but he needs to steal Michigan or Wisconsin.
	If he can do that inside straight, he can do this.
	But he needs North Carolina, Florida, hold all the states, And he needs to steal Michigan.
	And that's what we're looking at.
	And you know what?
	Michigan could be in play.
	Michigan has kind of changed.
	Western Michigan is going more liberal because a lot of Christian Dutch reformed people.
	And then the eastern side of the state, because a lot of the unions are sort of more working class, a lot of them are...
	Hillary Clinton just doesn't appeal to them.
	Hillary Clinton is just such a cackling, rapturous bitch.
	It's so hard to even listen to her.
	Even if you're educated, let alone if you're a guy working on the manufacturing line, how do you think she's going to have anything in common with you?
	We've got Trump leading in New Hampshire and Virginia right now as well.
	We have Trump leading in New Hampshire and Virginia?
	Yep, Virginia.
	Well, let's not call that right away because you never know which districts come in.
	Ben Shapiro, did Ben Shapiro just screw us?
	Is he not coming in?
	I'm not getting in yet.
	Alright, let me check this.
	Let me call Ben and see what's going on here.
	And you guys can hear me chew him out on there if he's there.
	He confirmed.
	We sent him all this stuff.
	Ben Shapiro.
	This is the worst election night ever.
	You know what?
	I don't want to say this, but I think it's going to get worse as the thing goes on.
	You think Hillary's going to win?
	I still am thinking Hillary is going to win.
	I don't like saying that.
	I don't feel good about saying that.
	I don't feel good about saying it at all either.
	I've had a knot in my stomach all day.
	All day.
	I think in the back of my mind, I've still kind of been holding out for this idea that a meteor was just going to crash in, wiping out both candidates, giving us a mulligan, and then we could all prance around wearing hashtag GodSentTheMeteor t-shirts.
	Oh, wait.
	Are we sure it was Shapiro first?
	That's what I have, yep.
	That's what I have.
	Are you sure it wasn't Kumeya?
	Nope, I got Shapiro.
	All right, well...
	Pardon my friend Shapiro, but you're an asshole!
	He'll make up for us.
	He'll make up for us.
	You know what, let's see if Klavan is around.
	People will just have all their own streams going on tonight.
	So, go on with what you were saying, Jared, as I send this.
	That was basically a conclusion of it.
	I think I was holding out.
	They didn't really set in today until I was writing that in that I had to picture either one of them there.
	And I didn't like the thought of either one of it.
	I just kept thinking in my head that the U.S. has been warring...
	For 300 years, for democracy, just so we can vote for one of these two asshats.
	Yeah.
	Was it Courtney who did the, she voted Trump, she did the I vomited?
	I vomited.
	I vomited.
	That's fair.
	That was fair.
	That was a lot of people.
	Did anyone write in Hopper?
	Tweet me at S. Crowder.
	I don't know if people wrote in Hopper.
	Gerald, you didn't write in Hopper.
	Do you know anybody who wrote in Hopper?
	I don't know if anybody rode an hopper or not.
	They should.
	I know some people wore some t-shirts.
	Yeah, with the hopper.
	Do you guys both have cold beers, at least, going on?
	Oh, yeah.
	Cold beers.
	Gotta have that going on.
	Yep.
	Right now, I'm going to miss Michigan beer.
	Buzz now.
	Alcohol poisoning later.
	Yeah, buzz now.
	Alcohol poisoning later, depending on how this goes.
	We have some pretty big videos coming up, too, by the way, in the works once we get into the studio.
	So it's going to be a weird couple of weeks.
	Bear with us.
	It's going to be a weird election night.
	Do you expect Trump to...
	What do you think Trump's most likely path is?
	North Carolina?
	Florida?
	Florida?
	Colorado, Michigan, Wisconsin, Pennsylvania.
	What do you think his most likely path is?
	Tweet us at escrow.
	I have the hiccups.
	I have the hiccups.
	We've got him leading significantly in North Carolina right now, too.
	Leading significantly in North Carolina.
	Which site are you looking at?
	I'm just looking at, if you just Google live election results, you'll get a little handy thing popping up there.
	No, I've got this here, and I don't have...
	Let me see.
	North Carolina.
	I've got them right now.
	70% to 28% in North Carolina.
	Well, it depends where the vote comes in.
	It always depends entirely on the district that comes in.
	North Carolina, here's what to expect.
	Black vote is down by only a couple percentage points.
	Latino vote...
	Here's the thing with Hillary Clinton.
	She is much more likely...
	To win the popular vote and not win the electoral college and the other way around.
	Because her coalition with Latinos and younger people, but she's not nearly strong with black people, that plays well, but it plays well in a lot of very pro-Trump states.
	So in Texas, in Arizona, in, well, she's probably going to get Nevada.
	In those states where the Latinos vote overwhelmingly for Hillary, and they've come out several-fold more, but, you know, there aren't as many Latinos in places like Michigan, in places like North Carolina.
	Whenever I see a Latino in Michigan, I go, how'd you get up here?
	How'd you get up here?
	It's a far away.
	I have no idea how you made it.
	But Division Avenue, man.
	They found it.
	What about Division Avenue?
	Division Avenue.
	There's a lot there.
	We've got Indiana, Kentucky, and West Virginia right now all called for Trump.
	So we've got those ones.
	What's the site you're using?
	Because the site I have doesn't have them called.
	Just like I said, Google Live Election Results.
	It just pops up there, the first thing there.
	So that's kind of what I'm following along with.
	All right.
	I've got my map up here.
	So you know what?
	I'm using Politico, and Politico sucks.
	Yeah, and it's hard kind of...
	Hard seeing where these are going, because like you said, the different districts have not been called yet.
	Yeah, we have called West Virginia.
	Yeah, those three are confirmed.
	Aaron was asking, okay, now I'm getting notifications.
	So West Virginia.
	So we have these called, let me check at AR15.com, what these people are thinking over there at AR15.com.
	West Virginia, add five.
	Yeah, I get it.
	We did add West Virginia.
	We added five.
	West Virginia.
	Indiana, Kentucky, West Virginia, right?
	Am I missing something?
	Vermont for Hillary.
	So we're at 24 to 3, correct?
	What's been called?
	Oh, Portman just won in Ohio.
	Nobody cares.
	Nobody cares about the local stuff.
	We've got a special guest.
	We've got this guy right here.
	Oh, pardon my French, but you're an asshole!
	Whoa!
	Calm yourself, dude.
	Asshole!
	You should just be grateful!
	That's true.
	Alright, we have Ben Shapiro.
	The problem is I have to tweet it out now, and I had your card ready.
	I'll tweet it out as well, and that way you at least get my...
	There you go.
	Hold on a second.
	And we have Ben Shapiro.
	Shapiro, and I will forgive him.
	Did you get our gift in the mail?
	I did get the gift in the mail, and it's in the other room, and so I will send one of the minions to go pick up the gift in the mail.
	Well, you better send one of your minions.
	So, I don't know if you heard the announcement, but we are going daily.
	I don't know if you heard this.
	I thought you were never daily.
	I know, we were never daily.
	I know!
	If only we could team up, and people could be getting the daily stuff with me and Ben and Klavan, and we have Levin, Stein, Malkin.
	This is going to be a big year, win, lose, or draw.
	So, Shapiro...
	At Ben Shapiro.
	He's been writing at Daily Wire.
	One of the funniest things I saw.
	He wrote an article.
	He sent it to me today.
	He rarely texts me.
	It's usually me texting him.
	Ben rarely texts me.
	He's just selfish that way.
	And he said, the silver lining in this election.
	And I click it, and the title is, I think, is there a silver lining in this election?
	And just in...
	It just says, no.
	And that was it.
	And I sat there.
	And the thing is, because it's on mobile, and with mobile, sometimes you have never-ending scrolling, or you have some video ads.
	So I was like, ah, it's one of those things that got covered by the autoplay video ad.
	So I was scrolling through, and I'm like, where the hell is the article?
	And then when it dawned on me, I was going, oh, okay.
	Well, that seems in line with Shapiro.
	It was definitely the most effort-effective piece we've ever had at Daily Wire.
	I mean, thousands and thousands of page views on an article that was one word long.
	So that was definitely...
	Some people said it was my finest writing.
	It wasn't bad, Ben.
	I'm not going to lie.
	Now, when does your live stream start?
	Our live stream is on right now.
	I mean, I just abandoned...
	Oh, oh, oh.
	You could have just brought us on that stream and we could have crossed streams.
	Yeah, we could have done that, but that would have required technical expertise.
	And as you know from your own terrible producer, we have ours here too.
	Well, that's what Jeremy asked.
	Yeah, he asked me to do that later, so I don't know if we're doing it later in the evening.
	I don't know, dude.
	Just don't ask me about it.
	Who do you think wins tonight with these results coming in?
	I mean, I'd be a fool to say that I think Trump's going to win with these results coming in.
	These are brutal results.
	What results are brutal results right now?
	He's leading in every poll.
	All the lines say, all the crowds say, Bill Mitchell says.
	As long as Bill Mitchell is still saying that the math favors Donald Trump, even though...
	Basic math is not good for Donald Trump.
	We can pretend along with him.
	The early results from some of the counties in Florida, the early results from some of the exit polls from Georgia, these are way too close in red states and way too far out.
	You're talking about before today, though.
	Right now, the results coming in North Carolina are, I don't know the districts coming in.
	That's what I'm trying to look for right now.
	I assume that the bigger cities would probably be coming in later in North Carolina, right?
	Yeah, I think that's right.
	I think that they count the rural votes first, and so that's why you see these big jump to leads for Trump.
	The stuff that I'm seeing online, I mean, Sean Trent, who's sort of the elections expert over at Real Clear Policy, says it's going to be a real early night.
	He says it'll be Hillary nationally by five or six points.
	Is he rigged, though?
	Everything's rigged.
	Everything's rigged.
	As we like to say, it's a rigmarole.
	So if you look at...
	There are counties.
	Is he talking under a freeway or under an airplane?
	I thought Ben made a little more money.
	He's living in Hawthorne underneath the runway with flights going over.
	You know what he could use?
	He could use some Ladder with Crowder shirts.
	Did he just go?
	No, he's still there.
	He's just very quiet.
	I'm here, I'm here, I'm here.
	You shouldn't insult a Jewish man and insinuate that he's not wealthy.
	Ben is very wealthy.
	Ladder with Crowder.
	LiveRothCarderShop.com.
	LiveRothCarderShop.com.
	That's right, we have those shirts.
	Okay, so Ben, you were saying, yeah, so this guy, he's saying that it looks, you think Hillary's going to win Florida and North Carolina?
	Yeah, I mean, right now, there are certain counties where Marco Rubio's running 10 points up on Donald Trump in Florida.
	They're saying that the voter turnout, I guess the exit polls earlier said that the voter turnout was like 39% minority in Florida, which is really bad news for Trump.
	He needs heavy, non-college-educated white voter turnout.
	We've got to get rid of the minorities, Ben!
	Well, I mean, that's what I've been told by all of the alt-right folks.
	So, unfortunately, I'm one of those minorities, according to them.
	So that's exciting.
	All right, you're a minority.
	You're translucent.
	Nate Silver says that there's a 54% chance that Republicans maintain the Senate tonight, which to me is more important than Trump winning, because I don't think Trump is going to win.
	I think they will maintain the Senate, don't you?
	I do.
	I think that Richard Burr is going to win in North Carolina.
	I think that Kelly Ayotte may win in New Hampshire.
	I think we'll lose Illinois.
	I think we'll lose Pennsylvania.
	I think we'll lose Wisconsin.
	It's about as close as you can get without losing the Senate.
	But I do think that Republicans are going to maintain the Senate, which is a good thing, obviously.
	I would not be surprised, by the way, if in the end, Donald Trump's electoral vote counts...
	It's higher than Mitt Romney's, but his popular vote count is much worse than Mitt Romney's percentage-wise.
	The way that I called this yesterday was I said that when I did my map estimate, my map estimate was Clinton 321 and Trump 216 or 217 in the electoral college.
	And my call on the popular vote was Clinton 49 and Trump 44, maybe 50, 44.
	Did you consult Dick Morris?
	Yes.
	You know, I always consult Dick Morris on all of my polling data, as well as on toe expertise.
	Yeah, that's exactly what I was going to say.
	As long as you get him the Brookstone foot massager, that man will open the vault for Every time I go to Brookstone, it's just Dick Morris going, I love it!
	I live for this!
	So the big question that I've been asking a lot of folks over at our Daily Wire feed tonight is we had on John Nolte, who is a pitchfork and torturous fellow, about never Trump.
	All the people who disagreed about Trump, those people ought to be pursued like Frankenstein through the village.
	Until they are caught and hanged presumably.
	Sean Hannity has been doing some of the same routine.
	He obviously said yesterday that we and never Trump, people like me who didn't vote for Trump, it's time for us to own it.
	For which I'd like to say, you know, it's about time that I got some sort of raise in this election, so at least they own something.
	But the question I think is going to be how badly this thing breaks up.
	What do you think?
	How badly do you think the breakup after this thing is going to be?
	Because I actually don't think it's going to be as bad as some folks want to be.
	You said to me, and it was hopeful, you said wounds heal more readily than most people realize.
	You still believe that?
	Yeah, I do.
	I think that that's particularly true in the wake of a bad loss.
	If Trump loses pretty handily tonight, which I think is the direction things are moving.
	By the way, Florida, he's in a lead right now, 49.8.
	Give it only 11% of reporting so far.
	Yeah, but totally.
	Yeah, exactly.
	But in any case, if he does lose tonight, then I think that there is a stench that comes off a dead political body.
	We saw it with McCain.
	We saw it from Romney.
	I think we'll see it from Trump.
	I don't think Trump is impervious to this.
	I don't think that there's a lot of people who are aching, aching for more Trump leadership after he loses badly to the worst major party candidate of my lifetime.
	Well, let me ask you this, though, about Florida, because, you know, the panhandle votes later.
	They haven't voted yet, and he has a lead right now.
	So wouldn't that suggest that he's more likely to pull ahead later?
	So it's possible that he polls later.
	I haven't looked at the county breakdown in Florida yet.
	What I'm seeing is that the counties where Barack Obama did well, there's high voter turnout, higher than there was in some cases in 2012.
	In counties where Barack Obama did poorly, it's about matching the voter turnout.
	And they've said that there's heavy Hispanic turnout as well.
	So, again, all of this is way too early to say.
	All I'm going to say is that my poll analysis is less good than that of Sean Trend or Nate Silver, both of whom seem to be trending towards us.
	He's the Mike Tyson.
	My polling analysis are impenetrable.
	My defense is impeccable.
	But just don't bite someone's ear and rape a woman.
	That would be disappointing.
	Sorry, I didn't know whether you were doing a Tyson impression or a Cernovich impression there.
	I have no idea what you're talking about.
	So, Trump is up in Virginia, but not Northern Virginia.
	That hasn't come in yet, which people should remember, because if I remember correctly in the primaries, wasn't it like, oh, Rubio?
	Wasn't it Rubio was winning Virginia, and then he lost because of Northern Virginia?
	That sounds familiar.
	Do you remember, Ben?
	You can correct me.
	Northern Virginia tends really...
	Heavy Democrat.
	The exit polls from Virginia have Hillary up by some insurmountable number.
	The exit polls that I saw earlier were Clinton up eight in Virginia.
	What I saw is the best state for Trump right now is, I think they said, the exit polls that I saw were Trump down two in Florida, Trump tied in Ohio.
	And Trump down two in North Carolina.
	Those were the exit polls that I saw.
	Obviously, exit polls aren't worth crap, so we'll have to see.
	I think he wins Ohio.
	Do you think he wins Ohio?
	I do think he wins Ohio.
	I think he wins Ohio.
	My map has him losing Florida, North Carolina, New Hampshire, Nevada, but winning Iowa and Ohio.
	What about Michigan?
	Frank Luntz seems to think Michigan is...
	Yeah, well, I mean, not to promote any disrespect to Frank Luntz, but I think that's a lot.
	I think the chances that Donald Trump pulls out Michigan are significantly lower than the chances that he could pull out someplace like New Hampshire.
	So, again, anything is possible.
	It's all speculation.
	We're all doing chicken entrails at this point.
	Yes.
	Well, that's what Huma's doing that with her spirit cooking.
	Chicken entrails and Hillary Clinton is cutting off her thumb.
	I do respect this about Ben.
	What I love about Ben is, obviously, I'm a little bit of a potster.
	And most people are like, oh, and they try and avoid it.
	And Ben just goes right in and is like, meh, Franklin sucks.
	When it comes to Frank Luntz, all I will say is that Frank Luntz has been advising a lot of Republican candidates for a long time, and those Republican candidates have not been doing yeoman's work.
	It is funny to me that all the people in the Trump camp who keep complaining about the consultant class keep relying on Frank Luntz's focus groups to decide whether Donald Trump is doing a wonderful job.
	I have a story about Frank Luntz.
	Should I tell it?
	Should I tell?
	It's not that bad.
	Is it a good story?
	Well, it's funny.
	Frank Luntz, he's all into like, it's not what you say, it's what people hear.
	He was at a really good steakhouse.
	You know my friend, Not Gay Jared, it's the other not-gay friend.
	And he was telling me about this, and I have no reason to not believe him.
	Gerald, you've heard this story.
	And they were at the nicest steakhouse in Grand Rapids, Shop House.
	You know how they come in, and then it's almost like, be our guest, be our guest.
	They all time, they bring them to the plate.
	Exactly in front of you.
	And he spent like 12 minutes, he was like, really?
	He was eating his steak, and he was like...
	He was really perturbed.
	I'm like, what's wrong, Frank?
	He's like, they're supposed to bring it in on the side.
	They're not supposed to lower the plate.
	And he was like, he gave advice to the servers on how they should do it.
	I'm like, that's their stick.
	They all come in, and they look at each other, and they lower it down in one thing.
	And he was upset by it.
	So when I heard that, of course, you don't have to mention the hair hat.
	It seems to be a lot of stuff in there is bizarre.
	But I don't dislike him.
	No, I don't hate Franklin's either.
	I'm just saying that his election results in Michigan, I'm not sure on what he's basing that.
	So, again, could I be totally full of crap and wrong about all this?
	Sure.
	I mean, we all could be, and it turns out that Trump won all 50 states plus the District of Columbia.
	I mean, it's possible that he also won Guam, but based on the numbers that I'm seeing, I don't see how Trump does well.
	Well, I also think that in places like California and New York, people on the right were so inward focused in how much we dislike Hillary Clinton, rightly so, because she's deeply, deeply corrupt and horrific.
	We forget how much the left hates Trump and how much the left hates Republicans.
	Imagine how much they hated Mitt Romney and then multiply that by a factor of one bajillion.
	That's an approximate number, and that's how much they hate him.
	And so in places – I live in California.
	The popular vote, as I say, I think the gap is going to be worse for Trump in the popular vote than it is in the electoral college, specifically because you're going to see – That's what I just said.
	They're lining up in California and New York just to virtue signal to their friends that they voted against Donald Trump.
	We didn't let this terrible racist xenophobe into the White House.
	And so they'll run up to score in places like California and New York.
	And you'll see, I wouldn't be surprised to see a five or six point victory.
	I voted for the vagina, you guys!
	It's like a hand puppet, so that's it, I think.
	Did you see Wendy Davis' tweet, by the way?
	I mean, you're down in Texas.
	You saw Wendy Davis' tweet today.
	I'm not down in Texas.
	Shut your...
	You are screwing up all kinds of different ways today, Ben!
	Okay, so Crowder's somewhere in Guam.
	Wendy Davis tweeted out a picture of a shirt, and it literally had ovaries on the shirt.
	And it said, Vote Hillary.
	And I thought that that was our making fun of these arguments.
	How was it ovaries?
	Like, you don't get to do that sincerely, right?
	Did it have, like, fallopian tubes?
	Ironically about that.
	Did it have fallopian tubes?
	Because if an ovary walked in this room, I wouldn't recognize it without the fallopian tubes.
	It did have the fallopian tubes.
	It sort of looked like a spirit-cooking goat head.
	Yes, yes, exactly.
	Otherwise, I would look at it and just be like, well, I don't know.
	This could be chitlets.
	I don't know what those are.
	I don't know if they're ovaries.
	So I need to see the arch that we all looked at underneath our covers when we had our medical diagram from school as we were kids going, look at All right, Ben Shapiro, we'll be checking in, I think, with you guys later, if you guys can get your lives from going.
	Yeah, we'll catch you one bit later, and we'll glum off your audience, and you can...
	Absolutely.
	And you can glum off ours.
	Now, by the way, folks, definitely subscribe to CRTV, which is where Stephen's going to be doing his Never Daily...
	He's a liar, but he's doing his Never Daily podcast over there.
	It was my exploratory committee.
	You understand these things, Ben.
	That's right.
	Check out CRTV. And then we can go head-to-head daily.
	Or you can just download us both.
	Download us both.
	The way that people sum it up with my podcast and Klavan's podcast is that I'm the downer and then you need to listen to Klavan to murder yourself afterwards.
	And I think that you definitely fall in the same category as Klavan.
	You're an upper show.
	I'm the place that you come to get deeply depressed and hungover, and Crowder's the place where you go to feel better about your life.
	I would say Mark Levin is where they go to learn about constitutional law, and then my program is where they go to watch legal liability in action.
	Yes!
	That's the split.
	That's about right.
	Ben Shapiro, DailyWire.com.
	Definitely subscribe, and we will have Klavan from there on coming up.
	Ben, thank you for making it.
	All is forgiven, sir.
	All right.
	Catch you in a bit.
	Thank you.
	Take care.
	And there we go.
	We have, looks like Trump is going to take Georgia 71% to 27%.
	They're finally counting New Hampshire four-point heat.
	Four-point lead for Clinton with a few thousand tallied.
	So we can't call any of these yet.
	Nope.
	But we should remind some of our new viewers now about this little guy right here.
	I'm going to blow this up.
	Oh yeah, for people who didn't know, lottowithcreditor.com slash mugclub.
	Why did we get a lot of new viewers since then?
	Yeah, a lot of new viewers.
	I'm going to put this right...
	lottowithcreditor.com slash mugclub.
	We've gone daily.
	If you're a student, it's less than $6 a month daily program.
	You get access to Levin, Michelle Malkin, Mark Stein.
	You misspelled Mark Stein!
	You misspelled Mark Stein, Jared!
	But you can join the Mug Club, ladderwithcredit.com slash Mug Club.
	You gotta admit, man, you have been off your game tonight.
	That is horrible.
	I have been so, just like, in knots today.
	I scheduled that in Facebook!
	Fix it.
	We'll schedule it.
	Gerald, how do you feel?
	How do you feel tonight?
	You couldn't hear Ben, could you?
	Because you don't have headphones.
	Give him his microphone.
	We have Gerald locked in the basement.
	Jared and Gerald.
	Sorry, Gerald.
	They're sitting there.
	It's okay.
	Gerald is our beer wench for the evening.
	Ouch.
	And I'm your construction worker, too.
	I feel very abused.
	But that's okay.
	That's absolutely all right.
	You guys are absolutely right, though.
	We do need to either have a meteor hit or something else.
	This is one of the most depressing elections I've ever been around.
	I haven't been around a whole lot of them, but with all of my experience, with all of my experience, I would say this is very depressing, and meteor should be on the horizon soon.
	Well, you know what?
	The silver lining is we're going daily.
	CRTV.com.
	You're going to join, right?
	You got Levin's dying.
	No, no, no.
	That's why I want the meteor even more right now.
	I have horrible friends.
	That's what I've learned in this election.
	I have the worst friends.
	No, I love it.
	I think it's fantastic.
	I get to get a mug, which is fantastic.
	I've held the mug.
	I have fondled the mug.
	South Carolina for Trump, just so you know.
	Those South Carolinians.
	Well, none of these are surprises yet.
	So here's the thing.
	Nothing that's been called a surprise that you can continue, Gerald.
	I've got this map.
	South Carolina.
	Trump.
	So he's got 33 to Hillary's 3, as far as I understand.
	Yeah, we did this math earlier.
	It's tough.
	There's some big states that we're going to all kind of keep an eye on, and it looks like Clinton has a gigantic lead in the really important counties.
	I thought you were going to say ass.
	No.
	No.
	Clinton has a gigantic...
	I'm like the Christian guy.
	I come in and I talk about theology and Islam.
	I'm not going to say that.
	I'm leaving it to you.
	Maybe in other countries.
	It just depends on the beers.
	After a couple more bells, two-hearteds, in my mug, hand etched.
	Hand etched.
	Wow, you're a shameless promoter.
	I'm just saying, here's the thing, and I know many of you will steal it.
	Listen, you want to take it to the left, you want to fight, lottowithcreder.com slash mugclub.
	Everything that's free is still free, and I know so many people will still complain.
	We're giving you the option to pay or still get the free stuff.
	And I even have some things like, I can't, I even have a couple tweets, I can't afford 580 a month.
	Okay, then I'm not your biggest problem right now.
	There's some bigger problems to work out, yeah.
	For less than two cups of coffee, you could join the Mug Club or Feed a Starving Child in Africa.
	But Tom's Shoes has that taken care of.
	I was just about to say, cut off one of the Feed the Poor Children things and sign up for the Mug Club.
	Oh, I cut mine off.
	She wouldn't stop sending me mails.
	Like, alright, I get it, you're grateful, but you don't have to mail me every month.
	Like, look at my dental work.
	That's gross.
	That's gross.
	That's terrible, man.
	It's absolutely terrible.
	But anyway, I was saying she has a gigantic lead in the counties that matter in Florida.
	So we obviously know that that's going to come down to a handful of counties, Dade being one of them.
	And she's got a pretty big lead in the early vote that they've counted right now.
	So it's substantial.
	So Florida, big deal, obviously, tonight.
	Yeah.
	Understatement.
	71.
	Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
	They think they're going to win all three.
	Traditional media.
	Once they do, it's checkmate.
	Traditional media.
	All right, we've got some big ones again coming up.
	16 states.
	That's all I'm going to take of Chuck Todd.
	Yeah.
	And Lester Holt.
	Lester, is he black or Indian or something?
	Your guess is as good as mine.
	Holt.
	You know, I'm going to put Georgia on the map for Trump.
	I think it's a pretty safe bet.
	Which is why I find it funny when Drudge was like, Trump, Arizona, Georgia.
	I'm like, well, of course!
	That's not an exit poll.
	This could be a long night, man.
	I'm glad Gerald is here.
	This is still going to bother me until we get this Velcro up on here.
	You did fix the base and the mid-levels, right, Jared?
	Yep, those are fixed.
	Fix the stein.
	Also fix the stein.
	We got that fixed as well.
	Is it spelled like a beer stein?
	He just...
	S-T-Y-N. Not even phonetically.
	E-Y-N? Is it supposed to be E-Y-N? Yeah, E-Y-N. There's an E in there, Jared.
	Dang it.
	This is the worst.
	I don't know why my computer's not giving me notifications.
	This is just...
	Now I know what it's like to have AIDS. That may be the overreach of the night.
	Well, I don't know.
	Yeah.
	The overreach is what you're doing with Gerald right there that people can't see.
	All you Christians out there, please pray for me.
	I'm in this room, and it's crazy, and, you know, I'm with these two guys.
	I don't know what to do here.
	All right, hold on.
	AR15.com, what do we have?
	He's defeatist horseshit, isn't capable of what people are talking about.
	Ben Shapiro.
	Well, thank you, AR15. The Jewish guy is gone now.
	So, looks to me like Trump is losing Florida.
	That'll be the end of it.
	That's what someone said.
	LOL at the slip-up.
	Ben slipped.
	I called it Texas.
	He's dropped hints before.
	I'm actually not in Texas, for people asking.
	I am not in Texas right now.
	I'm in Michigan.
	But thank you, AR15.com, for being so kind.
	We appreciate it.
	You know, I can't go to the live chat.
	There's just too much stuff coming in, so I'm reading your tweets.
	Tweet, Florida poll is still open.
	The panhandle will offset the numbers down south.
	Let's have whoever is handling the tweeting tonight.
	Jared, you know who that is?
	Tweet out a poll.
	Do you think Donald Trump wins Florida?
	Yes?
	No?
	Blame the Jews.
	Those are the three options.
	Let's get that out there.
	And let's see.
	We'll read your poll results.
	I will tell you this.
	If he doesn't win Florida, it's over.
	It's an early night.
	If he doesn't win Florida, it is over.
	If he doesn't win North Carolina, it's very likely over.
	I'm just being realistic here.
	If he doesn't win Florida, there's no way.
	If he doesn't win North Carolina, there's still a way, but it is a very, very slim path.
	So I am hoping that the panhandle...
	Panhandle should come through.
	It really is that Tampa corridor.
	It's that kind of middle area of Florida.
	An alligator ate your cat!
	It's so true.
	Was your cat gay like you?
	No, we don't know.
	We don't know.
	We lived down in the Orange Groves in the middle of nowhere, 13 miles from the nearest gas station.
	And our black cat would disappear just one day.
	So it could have been the gators.
	It also could have been the migrant workers.
	We don't know.
	We don't know.
	They're suspicious, superstitious people.
	Yeah.
	How much spirit cooking did you do to get your cat back?
	Spirit cooking?
	Not enough.
	Ooh, Clinton leading North Carolina 51% to 41.45.6.
	This comes in from Casey.
	Casey, oh, by the way, listen.
	We didn't do this.
	If you subscribe, you can bring it up, Jared.
	If you subscribe to ladderwithcredit.com slash mugclub, by the way, we have a limited supply of mugs.
	And for those at AR15.com, we're going to have some really cool giveaways, too, for subscribing members.
	You do, you know, not only do you get Daily Show, you get Jared's show, you get Mark Stein, Mark Levin, all this stuff, but you help keep people employed.
	Like we said, we had no budget, but now we employ full-time quite a few people.
	This is the staff who you help employ when you read the website, watch the videos, and now specifically when you join.
	We have Courtney, who people love.
	They send her creepy sexual comments, which, listen, she doesn't like them.
	I say keep it coming.
	Casey is there.
	She's gorgeous, too.
	She's a redhead, and as you know, when you like redheads, only redheads will do.
	It's borderline fetish territory.
	It's like a Japanese girl in old granny panties.
	Brodigan?
	Um...
	You can tell that Brodigan and Corey have health issues, mental health issues, but we love them and we support them anyway, and we don't want to fire them because we're afraid that they're going to come in and massacre us.
	So Courtney, Casey, Brodigan, Corey, and then we also have, of course, Jared, who works for me.
	You employ Jared.
	I just saw my monitors went dark.
	I don't know what happened.
	Courtney, there you go.
	Do you have the other image?
	Jared, of you?
	Yep, it's coming up here.
	Okay, so we have another image here of...
	So Courtney, Casey, Brodigan, Corey...
	Jared, Aaron, Francine, and then four more hires to be determined, by the way, as we grow.
	So we're not doing the golden ticket.
	There's Jared, there's Aaron.
	These are our film guys.
	All the videos you see, special thanks to Jared and Aaron when they're not screwing up typos.
	But they do work hard, and they do some great work.
	They're the ones who help make a lot of these videos happen.
	Francine now has been brought on.
	She's our full-time wardrobe makeup.
	Because it took Jared two and a half days to get the transgender bill.
	Francine has done this for a long time.
	And then we have a few more hires coming in.
	Writers, editors, shooters.
	We're really building this thing out.
	And I tell you what, with a fraction of the subscribers that the Young Turks have and a fraction of the content, the numbers that we have, we wanted to at the point only launch daily.
	When we had what we felt were comfortable numbers.
	We have half a million subscribers on YouTube.
	We have over 100 million plays.
	You actually include the videos that were removed before and ripped.
	We have hundreds of millions of plays, reads online, downloads on SoundCloud and iTunes.
	So we're at a place where, listen, we really want to provide you with some professional added content.
	And these people, you know, listen, they're dependent on you.
	They're lives.
	A lot of people don't realize with media entertainment, they think because you're not...
	You know, whacking a hammer.
	I mean, Courtney will work 14-hour days when she helps me write and edit.
	And you love Courtney.
	You love you read and see what she does.
	Casey is brilliant.
	Casey is just such a funny writer.
	Brodigan is the best pitch man in the business.
	Brodigan is just, he just reps out stories like I've never seen.
	Corey is new, and he's really coming along.
	He's funny.
	Casey and Courtney now are at a point where they're able to help him.
	It's a hard grind working with what we do.
	Heavy workload, but we do it all for you.
	There you go.
	Mark Stein, well spelled.
	Mark Levin, Michelle Malkin, Mark Stein, Stephen Crowder, the four horsemen, and woman.
	That was really sexist.
	That was blatantly sexist.
	We're coming for you.
	We're coming for you, Barbara.
	We are coming.
	And we're bringing hell with us!
	We're so excited about this going into the new year, man.
	I can't even tell you.
	Win, lose, or draw.
	Even if Trump wins, what they have done with him is criminal in the media.
	What they have done for Hillary is criminal in the media.
	And we can finally correct it.
	Think about this for a second.
	A lot of candidates didn't want to go on online outlets.
	The Young Turks were mad that Hillary didn't go on their program.
	You know, we had Ted Cruz.
	We had Fiorina.
	Trump avoided critical sort of online programs.
	We invited him.
	We would have more than welcomed him and been as friendly and fair as possible.
	Watch this next election cycle.
	That's not the case anymore.
	If you look right now, Joe Rogan, Adam Carolla, they have far more influence than Lester Holt or Wolf lowest score ever on Celebrity Jeopardy Blitzer.
	So they really, really do need to wake up here.
	They're in for a rude awakening.
	And by this time in 2020, this next election season, all of this is going to be different.
	So, no matter what happens tonight, I still think Trump could win.
	Statistically, it's not super likely, but he could win.
	But if he doesn't, it's not over.
	And we're going to make sure it's not over.
	Specifically what we're launching.
	We have to get Klavan on, don't we?
	We do.
	We're calling him now.
	We've not got an answer yet.
	We've not got an answer yet.
	Okay, we'll get Klavan on.
	It's just a crazy, crazy thing.
	We do have this, though.
	We do have this.
	It's just in.
	Trump wins Oklahoma.
	Trump wins Oklahoma.
	Oh, there you go.
	We don't have Hillary or Trump yet, do we?
	No, we're still connecting to them.
	Okay, Trump wins Oklahoma.
	So let me tweet this out.
	Well, make sure people manning the Twitter always tweet out our calls as well, along with the card to the live show.
	So Trump wins Oklahoma, that's no surprise.
	I think it's either Oklahoma or Idaho are the most conservative states in the country, right, Gerald?
	I don't know.
	I think Texas should be.
	Why are you here?
	I really haven't figured it out yet.
	I'm over here petting the dog and just, you know, hoping a beer doesn't get thrown at me.
	What would you say it is?
	Hey, you know what?
	You do here.
	Speaking of which...
	Go get us some more beer.
	I was trying to go for the major league thing.
	He's not called the best color man in the business for no reason, folks.
	I was trying to, you know, just trying to be your guy there.
	No, I appreciate it.
	I think they're the most conservative states in the union there.
	I wouldn't doubt it.
	Casey accidentally got kicked out of the group thread.
	I don't even know how that works.
	It's probably deserved.
	It happens.
	All right, hold on a second.
	We have this group thread here in calling the states.
	We also got Delaware and D.C. for Hillary.
	Maryland and Massachusetts for Hillary.
	No surprise there.
	New Jersey for Hillary.
	And Vermont for Hillary.
	Clavin is on Skype.
	He is almost ready.
	Hey, someone in the group text here.
	Jared, Aaron, Courtney.
	Add Casey back in there because she got kicked out of the group text for some reason.
	Someone add her.
	Do we have Mr.
	Clavin here?
	We do have Mr.
	Clavin here.
	Mr.
	Clavin.
	I'm here.
	Oh my god.
	That's on Flattering Light.
	Usually you come in and you look so sunny.
	This is awful, Andrew.
	What is this?
	Yeah.
	And you have this thing hooked up to you.
	I know it's your earpiece, but you look like, in Minority Report, like one of those corpses that's hanging that has all the tubes going into their body.
	The light makes you look...
	You know, you do wonders for my on-camera confidence.
	I feel great now.
	It's just the lighting is worse.
	It was terrible for Ben, too, because you guys, I guess you don't have the technological ability to cross streams yet.
	Well, Ben just looks like that.
	That's just the way it is.
	Okay.
	With me, it's the light.
	But with Ben, that's all as good as it is.
	All right.
	Hold on, Andrew.
	I'm letting everyone know that you are on the stream now.
	Can I see you?
	I can't see you.
	Can you not see me, Jared?
	I should be able to now.
	Can you see me now?
	There you go.
	There you go.
	Ah, it's just new with the Skype.
	That beautiful face.
	These kids.
	So, um, did you hear, did you hear, Andrew?
	We've gone daily, loudwithcrowder.com slash mugclub.
	People can subscribe now, Daily Crowder.
	I have to tell you, that mug is one of the best mugs I have ever mugged.
	You know, I don't like to compliment you because I know you're already, like, absolutely impossible.
	But that is one of the best mugs.
	I'm a little envious.
	I mean, I would just like a mug with, like, just some crayon.
	Yes.
	And you've got that thing that's chiseled away.
	You've got, like, some little poor slave in some country chiseled.
	Look at this.
	Well, actually, you know what?
	We did it right.
	We hired Barack Obama's half-brother, and he's just in a...
	He's in a basement, and he's going, Make America great again so I can have another job!
	Terrible with healthcare rollouts.
	Fantastic with mugs.
	Yeah.
	He's my glorified Flintstones pterodactyl who takes the pictures and the camera.
	Every now and then, he looks to the camera, and he goes, This job sucks!
	He gets clever quips like that.
	So you have your live stream right now at dailywire.com, right?
	You're there, yes, and just as entertaining as we can possibly be, which is not that entertaining, but it's, you know, as entertaining as we can possibly be.
	Well, yeah, it's, I mean, you know, you're there, you know, and then Ben, I'm sure, gets angry.
	So, who do you think, in your gut right now, who do you think is going to win this tonight?
	Oh, hold on a second, we might have to call some things in here.
	One second, update.
	Electoral count is 44 to 31 Clinton, so...
	That's what's happening in Florida, because as I was leaving, it looked like it was turning for Clinton.
	Well, no one sent me the Clinton states that she won.
	So, people out there on my team, stop screwing up tonight.
	Send me what Clinton has won.
	That's why you're in a thread.
	What?
	She just won Maryland.
	She just won Maryland.
	Okay, but what else did she win there?
	Hold on a second.
	So, are you aware that she won Maryland?
	So, oh wait, sorry.
	Maryland.
	What else did she win there?
	She won Delaware.
	Well, that's no surprise.
	D.C. She won D.C., okay.
	She's won Vermont, yep.
	New Jersey.
	New Jersey, shit!
	I was really hoping for New Jersey!
	Jared, bring this up on my screen.
	My maps here.
	He's got some great casinos there.
	So she's got 34.
	Anything else I'm missing?
	Massachusetts.
	For some reason, I already had Massachusetts in there.
	Awful places.
	Awful places.
	Terrible people.
	It's not looking good.
	It is not looking good for the Don.
	The Donald.
	Well, what makes you say that?
	Because the panhandle hasn't voted yet.
	What's good right now is the Senate's not looking good.
	I think we'll keep the Senate.
	But what makes you say that the panhandle hasn't voted yet?
	That's true, and it could go either way.
	You know what's bothering me is in the last few days, the polls have moved toward Hillary Clinton, which is not the norm.
	Normally, at the end of the race, the polls close up.
	The person who is ahead starts to fall further behind.
	The person who's behind starts to move closer ahead.
	This time, it has really separated people.
	This time, it's separated in the other direction.
	Clinton has actually picked up some votes.
	I'm not sure yet what the high turnout means, but one of the...
	In Colorado, it means one thing.
	They're turning out.
	Yeah, in California, too.
	Exactly.
	And one of the numbers from the Fox News exit polls was that all the new voters, a huge number of new voters, like way over 50%, were turning out for Clinton.
	Well, I will tell you what, it bothers me that a lot of conservatives are pointing to the Nevada polls.
	Nevada is done.
	People don't realize she's over 72,000, 74,000 ahead in Nevada.
	He would have to win today by a 10-point margin.
	So I just don't like lying to people.
	Also, Harry Reid would have to stop counting the votes.
	Yes, yes.
	Well, except he can't stop hurting himself with the rubber bands in the shower.
	But Harry Reid County votes is like that old, that old Abbott and Costello routine, one for me and one for you.
	Yes.
	Two for me and one for you.
	Until his drunken brother Larry comes in and goes, it's time to mud wrestle, Harry!
	They've called Rubio for Florida.
	That's very good.
	That's also a referendum a little bit on Rubio's national chances in the next go-around.
	So if Rubio wins Florida and Trump doesn't, that should tell the Republican Party something.
	What's that scotch you got going on?
	Yeah.
	Actually, it's Irish.
	It's Irish whiskey.
	I prefer scotch, but Jeremy Boring is the god king of the Daily Wire, and he's just an Irish guy.
	Irish whiskey is stupid.
	So is Canadian whiskey.
	You know what I like?
	Rye.
	I'm a rye whiskey guy.
	Rye is good.
	Rye is excellent.
	It's spicier.
	You know what I mean?
	It's a little harsher, but rye, it's nice in a cocktail or on the rocks.
	I'm also a big gin guy, which I know people think is for old ladies.
	It's fantastic.
	It's for English people who are mostly homosexuals, let's say.
	There's nothing wrong with that.
	I mean, I understand.
	Well, I guess Milo must keep Gordons in business year-round.
	I do.
	I like gin.
	I like that juniper.
	I want to drink a forest in my glass.
	Okay, so it's not looking good.
	So you call it.
	What do you think?
	Do you think Trump wins North Carolina?
	Or do you think...
	Yes, I think Trump's going to win North Carolina.
	I think he's going to win Ohio, though I think it's going to be close.
	I'm worried about Florida, but he may pull that out.
	You know, funnily enough, the big one is Michigan.
	I mean, that's why they were all crisscrossing through there all this time.
	And that would be an interesting turnaround right there.
	But, you know, it's still, look, I'm not big.
	You know, one of the things about these predictions, I'm not a predictor.
	I'm really not.
	And one of the things about predicting is it's all about having been right.
	But if you're wrong, you just kind of forget about it.
	It just kind of passes away.
	So I just don't do it.
	Hold on one second.
	Illinois just got called for Clinton.
	Jared, whenever I do this, bring it up on screen.
	Do your job.
	Yeah, Jared.
	Come on.
	He still didn't bring it up on screen!
	There you go.
	Thank you.
	Mississippi.
	Mississippi went Trump?
	Hold on.
	Mississippi went Trump.
	Oh, that Cajun Firefly in Princess and the Frog must just be thrilled.
	He's humping the moon right now.
	Where is Mississippi?
	I'm trying to...
	Yeah, Mississippi.
	There we go.
	Okay.
	Sorry.
	Did you ever see that?
	Did you ever see that?
	The Cajun Frog?
	The Princess and the Frog?
	Did you ever see that movie there, Clayton?
	No, I didn't see The Princess and the Frog.
	My kids grew up and I never went to a cartoon again.
	That was it.
	By the way, I don't know if you can see.
	There's leftover makeup.
	This is because I did...
	Well, we have Trump on the show later and it's very hard even with the towelettes to get rid of the makeup.
	So that's why you see this difference and see the chestness.
	I know I'm just doing this for you.
	Don't open your shirt.
	Yes, you do.
	You love it.
	You like it!
	I'm begging you, please.
	A button here, sure.
	There you go.
	Let's chop that up.
	I'm begging you, please.
	I'm begging you.
	Yeah, okay.
	Well, you know, Michigan, they were both there.
	Their last stop was in Grand Rapids.
	Gerald and I drove by.
	And what are you looking for, Gerald?
	You don't have to be quiet.
	You're not like the man who Jared keeps in his basement.
	You can speak, Gerald.
	It's okay.
	He's sitting there.
	He's walking around, and you're like, oh, oh, my God.
	If I'm in your basement and a guy is in my basement, that's really trippy.
	Aaron just said, Trump takes South Carolina.
	Do you watch this show, Aaron?
	We called that like 30 minutes ago.
	Sorry, Clavin, you've walked into an absolute cluster screw, but I appreciate it.
	I'm used to it.
	Yeah, so what do you think?
	I think if he doesn't win both North Carolina and Florida, we can mostly call it.
	I think if he doesn't win Florida, it's over.
	I think if he doesn't win North Carolina, he needs Michigan, at least, and everything else.
	So, I think right now it comes down to that Tampa...
	Like I said, many weeks, I think it comes down to that Tampa corridor.
	That central kind of Florida.
	And we'll see what happens there.
	It doesn't look great for him.
	But I still think he could. - So my question is this, that the election ends and let's, we will assume that Trump loses.
	You know, just a couple of minutes ago, One second.
	Trump, Tennessee.
	Go ahead, Andrew.
	Bring this up.
	He's a big, big Trump supporter, and he just unleashed a tirade against the never-Trumpers, the guys who he said, not just people who, out of principle, couldn't support Donald Trump.
	People who want to be on mainstream TV, especially, and based on Trump followers as bigots, you know, kind of picking up the left-wing line.
	And he was basically not out looking for forgiveness.
	He was not looking to have a period of grace.
	What I want to know is in the aftermath of this, if Trump remains a power, which it looks like he will be, it looks like he's going to get power in the Republican Party.
	Can the Republican Party ever be a majority again?
	You know, is this it?
	Are we still divided?
	They're pretty much done with the idea of this party as it was.
	I'll do my best to answer your question, considering you were speaking through a sandcastle bucket with the Internet connection.
	It looks like you're going through a...
	It was actually a sandcastle bucket.
	It was a sandcastle bucket.
	You're like, it's a fun night, they make a sandcastle and talk through it!
	Ben actually gave me hope.
	He said these wounds heal more quickly, more readily than people realize.
	I hope so.
	I think the worst thing that could happen from this election would be Hillary Clinton wins by not much.
	Donald Trump drags it out and then turns that into a war between people who have a lot of common ground, meaning people who like Rubio, people who like Trump.
	I think they need to get their eye on the prize for 2020.
	And understand that this is not the end of the country.
	I really don't think it is.
	I've been saying this to people, like, you're a defeatist.
	No, I've been trying to support him where I can.
	But, you know, Trump is lucky in many of these states to get 18% of the Latino vote.
	You know, 12% of the young vote under 35.
	So my point, people, you know, we have Ann Coulter out there saying, we're never going to win the Latino vote.
	I'm going, well, hold on a second.
	Do you really think Republicans can't get 35%?
	Do you think they can't get 40%?
	Do you really think they can't get 30% of the under 35 vote?
	We just need to do that.
	So this idea that you need to win a demo, you don't.
	You just need to mitigate the losses.
	And I think that we're seeing a big transition, especially because it's been the establishment for so long, and we'll have it with Hillary.
	I think it's very likely she'll get primary.
	She's a one-term president.
	She's so unlikable.
	And so I think because she's so unlikable, people can coalesce around hating her.
	You know, I have an agreement.
	It's on both sides.
	The left is saying triumphantly, we're not going to be a majority white country forever.
	I don't care if it's a majority white country, I just care if it's a majority free country.
	So my question We're barely hearing you.
	Jared, can we hit him on a phone line?
	Yeah, let's try that.
	Let's hit you on the phone line, Andrew Clever, and just wrap up that question because I think it's an important one and I want to hear it.
	Jared, do you have him in there?
	Yeah, I'm going to.
	His landline?
	All right, let's call his landline.
	Sorry, it'll be a phoner.
	Let me see.
	I've got this right up here.
	Trump, South Carolina.
	Clinton currently leading Michigan 50 to 44 percent, Casey told me.
	But what does that include from Wayne and Kent County, Casey?
	That's what matters most.
	Wayne and Kent County.
	Someone just said again, Nate, Nate, I love, just said, just said again, this is Trump, South Carolina.
	We get it!
	I think we're getting different places calling them at different times, different news sources.
	Did you call Andrew Cleveland's landline?
	Yeah, we're trying to get a hold of him.
	Okay, we're trying to get a hold of him.
	I think his question is a valid one, and Aaron is making sure to handle the tweets right now?
	Yep.
	Okay, good.
	So I don't have to worry about the tweeting at all?
	Nope.
	What was that face looking at Gerald?
	No, I was looking at the screen.
	You were looking at Gerald, he did this?
	No.
	Screen.
	So we've got the Twitter.
	It's going well.
	All right, let me look at the polls here.
	We had a poll.
	Do you think Donald Trump...
	Look at the polls.
	Do you think Donald Trump will win Florida?
	In fact, the other way, it was tipping Texas Hillary for a second there, and now it's tipping back.
	Will Trump win Florida?
	Aaron, you smartass.
	He just said, Trump is a Republican candidate.
	Just looked it up.
	2,200 votes.
	42% say yes.
	31% say no.
	27% say blame the Jews.
	So most people think Donald Trump's going to win Florida.
	Let me look at AR15.com.
	What do they think?
	Do they think Donald Trump is going to win Florida?
	Can we get Andrew Klavan or no?
	He's not coming back.
	All right.
	Never mind then.
	Nope.
	We've got Hillary currently leading in Michigan, by the way.
	Currently leading in Michigan.
	Hey, Naki, text me what it is that you're looking at here, so I have it as well.
	Oh, someone has bullet bourbon by a fireplace over there at AR15.com.
	Very nice, very nice.
	Someone's saying the Mug Club does not...
	They're getting an air message kicking them out.
	Hold on one second.
	Let me make sure this is going right.
	Gerald, take the microphone here and tell people what you think about Florida.
	Tell people what I think about Florida.
	No, Jared, send me the link.
	There's a link.
	A couple of people have said that the Mug Club, they're having a problem finding the student price.
	We know about it.
	Courtney's working on it right now with CRTV people to make sure that you guys can get in there and get the student discount.
	So they're going to get that fixed for you guys.
	Sorry, Evan, I know you tweeted or commented about that.
	So if anybody else is having that problem, just hang on.
	We'll get that fixed for you.
	And then I'm hoping...
	Every time you say South Carolina has been called, I'm hoping there's a second South Carolina that I've never known about that maybe is just a few miles offshore.
	It's like South Carolina 2, and we pick up some electoral votes.
	That'd be fantastic, but I don't think that that's the case, unfortunately.
	Okay, hold on a second.
	Keep talking.
	Keep talking, because I'm trying to fix this mug club thing.
	I love talking.
	Mostly to you, Jared.
	Mostly to me.
	It's very nice, actually.
	So I don't...
	The way the numbers are looking right now, I've been watching Florida.
	Jamie Dupree tweets out a lot of really interesting facts throughout the night about some of these things.
	And some of the key counties are not looking all that great as far as comparing to Romney, right?
	And how Romney did versus Obama.
	And the Trump lead is narrowing.
	In some places throughout Florida, and then in the places that really do matter, the Hillary lead is expanding greatly.
	So, I don't know.
	We kind of think it comes down to this.
	This is kind of like D-Day.
	If he doesn't win a combination, like you said, of that Florida-North Carolina, we think he's going to get Ohio, but then Michigan and Wisconsin, he's really got to take them on.
	There's not a whole lot of margin for error.
	For Florida, I'm seeing 87% in, and it's like a dead heat, 48.5% tide.
	Yeah.
	Dead heat, Florida.
	Yeah.
	People are saying he's picking up ground in Florida, he's picking up ground in Virginia.
	So Clinton leads New Hampshire right now, 54 to 40.2.
	Gosh.
	All right.
	So, you know, if I look at these states, though, Jared, I'm not seeing it.
	This is what I have on my screen.
	So I don't know what it is that you're telling me.
	I don't know what this is.
	If you're calling that president and states, that's what I'm looking at.
	So we got that right now.
	We got this live interactive map.
	So Clinton leading in Michigan and Ohio.
	That surprises me right now.
	She's leading in Michigan and Ohio.
	So it's 44 to 51.
	Wait, hold on a second.
	How is it 44 to 51?
	Again, it kind of depends on which site is calling it.
	Which race is here?
	Okay.
	Yeah, you get a lot of them.
	I've got it at 68-48.
	Delaware, Maryland, D.C. I've got her at 54-73.
	Well, I also gave him Georgia.
	So, okay.
	Well, we're looking.
	Most people seem to think he's going to win Florida.
	Like we said, it could happen as he goes.
	Now someone is...
	Darren's saying he's leading Ohio 51-44.
	This is not correct.
	This is the kind of mayhem that I expected tonight.
	No, right now I'm looking at the live results in Ohio.
	52% Clinton, 45% Trump.
	So a lot of these are too close to call, so we don't know yet.
	We're going to call them as soon as they get in.
	Help us, tweet us, let us know.
	And let me know if your mug club sign-up is working.
	This just in.
	Let me take you to 2016 and our map here, and I'm going to show you Hernandez.
	And that's all I can take again.
	That's all I can take, Chuck Todd?
	Yep, that's all I can take.
	It looks like a caterpillar.
	It looks like Huma's nether regions were just copy-pasted.
	Like a caterpillar made with a pine cone?
	Yeah.
	No, not like a pine cone.
	It looks like Huma's nether regions.
	Hey, Gerald, can you fill us up here with some brew?
	Is it time for a beer run?
	No, because you're not contributing.
	You're just sitting there.
	No, I know.
	I'm just waiting on the call, man.
	I mean, I'm like the reliever in the bullpen just waiting to be called up.
	Or out, I guess.
	It's too soon for the bullpen to talk to me.
	It's too soon.
	I'm a Cleveland boy.
	It's too soon.
	Beer number 17, Stephen.
	I told you 18 was your limit.
	All right, buddy?
	You get one more and that's it.
	There we go.
	Go ahead and get it going.
	Clinton is overperforming in North Carolina.
	That's a little upsetting.
	A little bit upsetting.
	Yep.
	I've got her in the lead in North Carolina, Ohio, Michigan right now.
	So, again, it's just all such a toss-up.
	Well, Michigan, she's ahead by a lot.
	So, it depends on which counties are coming in.
	We don't know that yet.
	Interesting thing, Wayne County, Kent County.
	Kent County is Grand Rapids, Western Michigan.
	We could guess the way some will swing.
	Some of them are a little bit predictable.
	The union members?
	Yes.
	Well, the union members, I said more UAW union members were going Trump than anywhere else.
	I don't know.
	I don't know if I believe that.
	Tell them the story, Jared, so I'm not left here to do everything on the vine.
	Tell them the story you were telling about the unions while I check something.
	The unions, the fact that they get flyers in the mail almost every day.
	You're talking not just your public sector, but even your private sector unions, your UAWs and whatnot.
	They spend so much money, so much money on getting you pamphlets, material, literature every day telling you you're going to live in a box.
	If you don't vote for Hillary Clinton.
	Yeah.
	So, it's kind of just, it's tough to win this.
	That's why it's so tough to win that whole rust belt between Pennsylvania, even parts of Ohio, a lot of manufacturing, Michigan.
	I'm making a point.
	I'm getting very irritated.
	I understand that.
	When you bang the desk, it comes through on your microphone.
	And it, more importantly, makes me want to strangle you.
	That's fair.
	Let's see here.
	Updating, updating.
	Yeah, everything's just on the brink of being called up.
	Is the Mod Club working for people out there?
	Is it working for people out there?
	Tweet us.
	Tweet us, at SCrowder.
	It should be working, hopefully.
	We have Anthony and Gavin.
	Anthony and Gavin and Nick DiPaolo here coming up in a little bit.
	There we go.
	Gerald just got us some more beverages.
	I appreciate that.
	I'm trying to check this out here.
	Oh, so there's a promo code for students, we should have said.
	The promo code if you're a student is type in student for the Mug Club right now.
	That should be easy to remember.
	Even for college students.
	Keep talking while I get this.
	$69 per year gets you the mug, gets you all the content, and stay tuned for the beginning of the year because there will be some monthly options available.
	But you won't get the mug, and you want the mug.
	The mug is really freaking cool.
	It's a cool mug.
	Yeah, $69 per year.
	Code student.
	I can go ahead and bring this graphic back up again so everyone can see what we're talking about.
	Sorry, I'm getting this up.
	Yep.
	So there you go.
	And also, by the way, I believe it applies to vets, and they're going to have some more discounts.
	So if you join at the full price, $99 a year, that's still $7 a month.
	And you're a vet, you can just send an email, call the customer service line, tell them, and they will fix your account.
	Or if you join tonight and you're a student...
	Or if you want to, for example, get it for someone else who's a student, you know, it makes a great Christmas gift, type in student and they'll just ask for an EDU address afterward.
	They'll verify it with a valid EDU address.
	So, no, Aaron, Trump will not take Pennsylvania.
	It's too early to call this stuff.
	Just because he's up 80 to 17, it means one district came in.
	Gerald is laughing.
	All right.
	I don't think Trump takes Pennsylvania.
	That's one I don't know why.
	I think he has a better chance at Michigan than Pennsylvania, honestly.
	I think Pennsylvania is this carrot that they dangle out, and Republicans haven't won Pennsylvania since, I think, Reagan.
	And before that, it still was never a state.
	Gerald, do you have any input, anything to add here, other than sitting on your ass?
	I was just going to say I agree.
	And I think that I didn't get enough credit for bringing the beers.
	I really don't.
	No, but it was a little tepid.
	I will say...
	What?
	I didn't even bring you one, so what do you mean?
	Okay, this is my old beer, then.
	That's why it's tepid.
	I can't be blamed for these types of things.
	That explains a lot.
	Yeah.
	I don't think he's going to win Pennsylvania.
	And like you said, if he's up by any significant margin in that state, it's only because six or seven people's votes have been counted.
	That's why you get awkward percentages.
	But last time I checked the Ladder with Crowder poll, by the way, in Florida, I think it was the juice.
	Wow.
	Well, it said it.
	I mean, I don't know.
	And that was a significant number of people responding to the poll.
	Yeah.
	So, you know, that's not just a small sample there, which is fantastic.
	And now I think you understand why there's like 75 people at these networks trying to cover this election stuff.
	There's so many different stories coming out.
	And until we get real election results as we go and as we call these states, you're going to see people tweeting out, oh my gosh, it's close in this state.
	We didn't think it was going to be, and it's really not.
	Yeah.
	There's going to be a lot of false starts.
	Yeah, we don't want to preemptively call any states.
	Right.
	So, we're looking at this.
	Don't preemptively call states because there's 3% of the vote in.
	Exactly.
	Pennsylvania has 51 votes and 239.
	Don't delude yourself either.
	Why would you do that?
	People on the thread on my team are doing it.
	Just stop screwing with us because we're doing a live broadcast, seriously, and don't actually preemptively call stuff that we don't know because it just gives me more work to have to go research and see that you're...
	And then I have to go get more beers.
	And eventually we run out.
	And you know what happens when that happens?
	Yeah.
	I get thrown out of a window.
	Florida, by the way, Trump's up 49-48 now.
	So it looks like he's pulling ahead in Florida a little bit.
	Florida's close.
	Florida's really close.
	North Carolina's not even close.
	Virginia, there's not enough of the votes.
	I'm surprised that at this point she's that far ahead in Ohio.
	I wonder which...
	You're an Ohio boy, Jared.
	What do you think that means?
	Do you think that means that...
	What cities in Ohio would be more...
	Obviously rural areas, but would any of the big cities in Ohio?
	Because you've got Columbus, Dayton, Cincinnati.
	Columbus is incredibly liberal.
	Cleveland.
	Cleveland will lean liberal, but I think you're going to find probably more Trump in Cleveland.
	Um...
	But there's a lot of rural areas in Ohio, so if those people come out strong, it could be enough to make it competitive.
	She's killing it in Cuyahoga County.
	Plus she has LeBron James, so there's that.
	There is that.
	She campaigned with LeBron James.
	You know what I think is...
	I don't downplay that, because he is the most influential person in sports.
	So that was smart on her to do, but...
	Between that and not getting Kasich's full-on endorsement, that could hurt Trump a little bit, I think.
	Yeah, Aaron out there, Jared, fix the card, because the card doesn't work.
	Okay, we'll take a look.
	The mug club thing.
	So, Courtney, Casey, Aaron, get the mug club featured on the homepage of ladderwithcrowder.com, please, and get the card working to send it to there.
	Please.
	Thank you very much.
	Promo code STUDENT. STUDENT is the promo code.
	You get it for $69 a month.
	Let's get microphones working and the mug club working.
	We're looking here at live results.
	We have Anthony Cumia and Gavin and Nick DiPaolo.
	I don't know if they'll all be on at the same time.
	We'll be crossing streams, which could create a rip.
	And the space-time continuum.
	You know, in Ghostbusters, you're not supposed to cross the streams.
	I don't know why we keep crossing streams here talking about doing it.
	It's very unsafe.
	I mean, until the very end, and we know when they had to.
	Yes, this is absolutely true.
	Nothing changing on the map right now.
	Looking at AR15.com, seeing what people are saying, what they have to say about the election.
	They think he's going to win Florida.
	Someone saying, oh, you're in Texas.
	It's closed Florida, but with 73%.
	Trump is down by...
	No, that's wrong.
	That was a half hour ago.
	So hopefully these people get their stuff together and get your...
	Get your stuff together!
	A good amount of Florida in.
	Good amount of Florida in.
	So Trump is ahead with a good amount of Florida in.
	He's got to get it.
	He really does.
	He absolutely has to get it.
	The rest of this map almost becomes inconsequential because of the way that the polls looked going into the election night.
	If he doesn't take Florida.
	So if you guys have beers and very high alcohol, like the 18% beer you made me order yesterday, if you've got those on tap and he loses Florida, it's time to crack them.
	Estimated 91% in in Florida.
	And Trump is ahead by, gosh, he's ahead by under 100,000 votes.
	This is crazy.
	Florida's really tight.
	We ought to find out what that automatic recount threshold is.
	It's usually pretty low.
	Well, if it's Al Gore, it's two million.
	There's no dimpled chads and hanging chads and pregnant chads, are there?
	I don't know how Chad got so involved last time, but...
	It's a very, very bad situation otherwise.
	All right.
	Just bad machines.
	So we're still waiting to call in Florida.
	AR15.com they're talking about.
	I'm calling Trump for Florida because reasons.
	Just a bullet.
	Someone's drinking bullet whiskey.
	Thank you very much.
	People are saying they enjoy it.
	I hated you before, but I enjoyed the election coverage tonight.
	Well, thank you.
	Posted by America is the person.
	He just has the handle America.
	America!
	All right, Jared, let's get the Kumeya broadcast on.
	Yep.
	And let's see how this...
	Do you have Alabama for Trump yet?
	Did you get the card fixed, Jared?
	I think it's updating, but it should be working here soon.
	All right, we're going to get Anthony Kumeya, Gavin on, or Nick DiPaolo here in just one second.
	Sorry, we're doing everything.
	We don't have the Lester Holt budget.
	Or the Brian Williams budget.
	Williams budget.
	Bringing on Anthony Cumia.
	Tweeting this out.
	We got him?
	We got him.
	All right, hold on one second.
	Hold on one second.
	Don't bring him on yet.
	Don't let me bring him on yet.
	Let me get out the card and tell me who's there, just so I can know before I see.
	Oh, we got Anthony, we got Nick, and two other gentlemen I'm not familiar with.
	One is wearing a woman's wig.
	Okay, well, hold on.
	Let me...
	So there's that.
	Let me get this out there, so...
	Anthony, Nick, and you guys are there?
	Cunt College is up there.
	My sister went to Cunt College.
	Oh, did she?
	She got a free ride at Cunt College.
	Who's that in the wig?
	She returned punts for Cunt U. I don't know if they can hear you yet.
	Can you guys hear me?
	Have I been put into this program yet?
	And it all comes from the Civil War still.
	They're still fighting that battle.
	Remember that?
	We're not in their feed yet.
	We're not in their feed yet.
	This is a disaster tonight.
	This is a disaster.
	I don't know what people are thinking.
	Talk with their producer and then bring me in when they know that we're coming on.
	But they were talking about something with the university, I believe.
	Something in the land of higher education.
	So, I'm not entirely sure.
	They're looking at Florida getting ready.
	They're looking at calling it now?
	Getting close.
	91% is in.
	Not yet, 91% is in.
	Can you hear me, dude?
	We can hear you on the program, so just put us right through to the program, Mr.
	Producer.
	That's why we scheduled this several days in advance.
	Everyone's listening to you.
	Say hi to people on the air.
	How's it going, world?
	Good job.
	Good, thanks.
	And let's cross the streams and let's create a wormhole.
	What happened?
	Oh, oh, where?
	What?
	There we go.
	Oh, there he is.
	There you are.
	All right.
	David Crowder.
	We need, maybe the monitor in here isn't turned up.
	Hold on, Stephen.
	We'll get you.
	Press the button.
	Press the button.
	Someone needs to get rid of that producer there.
	He was talking.
	Who's the guy in the wig?
	I can't tell.
	The guy.
	Excuse me, Stephen.
	Excuse me.
	It's Megyn Kelly.
	Hillary Clinton is here this evening helping us out.
	Oh, okay.
	Well, I will say that's horrifying on just a multitude of levels.
	It is quite horrifying, Stephen.
	What are your thoughts early on here, some of these states coming in?
	Any surprises?
	No.
	No surprises yet.
	You know, we're waiting.
	Obviously, it's a nail-biter with Florida, because if Donald Trump loses Florida, it's over.
	I'm surprised as to how she is over-performing in North Carolina, given the low black vote.
	I just thought they hated her.
	So, this is surprising me.
	What do you guys think?
	In your gut over there at the compound media, who do you think wins?
	It's called cheating.
	Nick DiPaolo says it's called cheating.
	I... I don't have any faith, but I never do.
	Whenever I'm involved in a contest, I always assume my team is going to lose.
	And this is no different.
	I remember the Romney-Obama thing.
	Early on, Romney started taking those shitty little states that give you a couple of votes, and then California and New York kick in, and you go, oh, that's right.
	We get screwed every time.
	I think we're going to be gravely disappointed again.
	Well, I think those New York values that all of you guys love to act, you were outraged about with Ted Cruz, came back to bite you in the ass.
	So I think that's...
	Believe me.
	Stephen, it's not me.
	That was one thing that was so silly.
	Remember when Trump was like, stop and insult the New York values.
	Like, what?
	They're crap.
	You shouldn't insult New York values yourself.
	There's no way they're voting for you.
	They're horrible values.
	But it's the way you know how it works.
	The Democrats ship in these voters...
	They package them as voters.
	They put them in certain areas of the state so they know that no matter what the rest of the state does, their little machines that they put in a place will do the job and elect them.
	That's Well, it used to be, yeah, you know, it's obviously they ship them in.
	They put a few trannies in public stalls and make sure they pull the lever for them.
	It's just the constant buying of votes now.
	That's what it is.
	It's like any lowest common denominator voter we can get.
	So I do think this whole election has a much less educated electorate than any in previous years.
	It is remarkable how uninformed people are, which is crazy with social media.
	You probably noticed this, Anthony.
	You'd think you'd get more info out to them, but they end up getting less because of all the clickbait crap.
	Like today, someone said, oh, Trump.
	Someone already called Pennsylvania for Trump on Twitter.
	And we're like, no, that's not true.
	Didn't even.
	Yeah, it hadn't even closed yet.
	Or I just don't.
	We were talking about this earlier, too.
	They're not.
	The Democrats have a bunch of their voting base that is not educated.
	They do not research.
	You mean felons?
	Don't fucking book felons, illegal immigrants, 22-year-old girls in college don't have their kids together politically.
	Syrian refugees.
	I've never seen Nick so serious.
	He looks like he's about to swallow a knife.
	Nick is...
	Look at him!
	Look at him!
	And it's worse because he's lost weight, so he's not like the jolly fat guy.
	Who?
	What the fuck are you saying, you fucking...
	So you lost so much weight.
	Now you look like an angry CIA agent, as opposed to like...
	I've been here since fucking noon.
	Give me a fucking break, will you?
	Well, you've been here since noon, and it doesn't look like it's turning out well tonight.
	But look at you.
	You have lost weight.
	I thought you stopped doing the P90X last time we talked.
	You said your knees were like Jiffy Pop.
	What is all this about weight?
	Who cares about the weight?
	I don't know.
	I'm sitting next to the governor of fucking Alabama in 1963.
	We need your vote.
	This guy didn't want black kids to go to school as white kids.
	He does.
	He looks like every racist lawyer in the courtroom drama.
	There won't be no color marrying a white woman!
	We're going to divide the buses in half.
	When they said a lot about, to get back to what we're talking about, Donald Trump being racist and all that, and they're like, oh, he said all Mexicans were racist.
	I don't think he said all Mexicans were rapists, excuse me.
	He didn't say all Mexicans were rapists.
	And even if you, look, some of my best friends happen to be rapists.
	So that helps.
	Well, one of them is Donald Trump.
	I mean, like, maybe he should have come out for the rapists.
	Well, we'll say almost all Mexicans are racist.
	They really are an unbelievably racist bunch.
	Mexicans in the South, they're not shy about it at all.
	I've never hung out with them.
	That's because you're racist, so that's the problem.
	We're not bridging the divide.
	Got about that.
	They're not all racist.
	It's just the ones that are going to build a wall.
	Yeah, though...
	Yeah, what are you looking at in the next 20 minutes or so?
	We got 9 o'clock coming up.
	Now, what states are...
	Shelby just won the Alabama Senate and Todd Young won Indy.
	So I know no one cares, but I don't know.
	I just lost 10 grand on Shelby.
	Well, I don't think there's any winner in this.
	So did all of you just go in and just, what did you do?
	Vote straight Republican ticket?
	That's what I did.
	Yeah, I did a few of those tax people that don't like taxes.
	I drew a swastika on mine before I did it.
	Now, don't you think that Florida being this close between Clinton and Trump, that it has to be disputed at this late in the game?
	We're looking at over 90-something percent.
	Gosh, I hope not.
	The Al Gore look won't do well for Trump.
	So I think he might win.
	I think he might win Florida looking at these numbers because the panhandle comes in later.
	So that actually favors him.
	Oh, is that it?
	Yeah.
	Very crackery.
	Of all the...
	Gay Miami Beach people voted already?
	Is that it?
	Those people?
	Let's go to Paul's nightclub and celebrate!
	Well, you know, the thing is, Cubans actually aren't big fans of Trump, which is very new.
	They're typically very Republican.
	So, for whatever reason, Trump pissed off the Cubans, and I think that's why it's made it closer.
	You know what that is, Stephen?
	At least I heard on the radio.
	It's the younger Cubans.
	They don't vote like their parents.
	Is that it?
	They get caught up in the liberal shit.
	Of course, because we're a media-driven society.
	Young people fucking soak this shit in.
	That's where they learn that.
	Obama opened it up to go to Cuba, too, and Trump said he would close that back off.
	Yeah, that's true.
	Well, their parents came over here on floating chairs, and then the kids are going to Ivy League schools where they're teaching them about privilege, so it's a real generational gap.
	I've never met a Cuban...
	My horse and carriage is for hire, senora, for just as long as you desire, senorita.
	We're gonna run, forget the mañana, and come to Havana with me.
	This is what the end of the world looks like.
	This is what the end of the world looks like.
	We go to Cuba!
	Doesn't any of the kids remember Ricky?
	You look like McConaughey in Dallas.
	Dallas Buyers Club?
	Yes.
	And the guy in Hillary looks like Jared Leto.
	That was the worst film, Dallas Buyers Club.
	I had it.
	I get the screeners.
	You guys probably do because you're in the union.
	I was like, oh, it's just a guy dying slowly of AIDS and Jared Leto also dying slowly of AIDS. And I watched it for two hours.
	And you didn't like that?
	I wasn't a huge fan.
	I couldn't watch 12 Years a Slave either.
	Those were the same year.
	What did you see there?
	I thought you were the counties was coming out.
	Trump was way on top in Florida.
	It just looked like a big advance there.
	Oh, in Hillbilly County.
	That'd be good.
	I'm looking here.
	I think it was Meth County, Florida.
	With Shitkicker County.
	Yeah!
	Shitkicker County.
	Oh, shit.
	Isn't it amazing that we put such our beliefs in Florida and every day there's news that says, Florida man does this.
	Yeah, I guess.
	Rape's an obligator.
	Rape's an obligator.
	It's horrible.
	And we are sitting here hoping they figure it out.
	It's fucking Florida.
	It is.
	I don't know.
	I hate that Florida and Ohio determine the fate of our country.
	It's hard to vote and you're on bath salts.
	Chewing a man's face off.
	And then head on into the voting booth.
	Free flocca for everyone.
	Did you hear about some of the Scantrons not working there in Pennsylvania?
	Have you heard about that?
	Yeah, that's because of the Amish.
	They built a bunch.
	Is that it?
	They're made out of fine wood.
	It's just a wood going into a peg.
	They make those eaters for your house.
	Listen, hopefully you guys have a good evening.
	We're going to have to bring on our favorite resident gay, Dave Rubin, here soon, and we'll check in with you guys later.
	Thanks for checking in.
	Where's Gavin?
	Is Gavin there later?
	Yeah, Gavin is at some gay bar.
	I believe it's called a gay bar.
	Okay.
	I don't know where he is, but they're doing that.
	They're doing a thing called beard rubbing, where the men just do that.
	It's docking for the face.
	Yes, well, it sounds very much like Gavin would do.
	At least he drew his beard back in time.
	That would have been awkward only about four weeks ago.
	The man has no chin whatsoever.
	It's terrible.
	Well, it's defined by the hairline.
	Anthony Cumia, Nick DiPaolo, a guy who's Hillary and an old racist lawyer.
	Thank you very much.
	We must go.
	Thank you.
	Take care, you guys.
	Hey, bring up CNN or bring up a network.
	People are saying bring up a network to compare it, so let's bring it up as a split screen a little more often.
	Let's see what they're doing over there at CNN tonight.
	This is at NBC here.
	Both the Democrats that I've talked to and the Republicans that I've talked to, they're talking about long lines.
	I just talked to the Delaware County chair of the Democratic Party who thinks that they're going to be counting votes here for a long time after the official poll closing.
	So polls closed here at 8 o'clock, but they think they're What do you guys want to say, Gerald?
	They called it for Chris, right?
	So we've got two Senate races.
	Evan Bayh is the guy that got beat in Indiana, so that's a big deal.
	The Democrats courted him, tried to get him back in there, and that didn't work out so well.
	And then we're also projected to keep the House of Representatives.
	Not a bad night?
	No, that's not a bad night.
	There's some good, momentous things.
	Ooh, wow.
	Looks like Clinton got Rhode Island.
	From what I see, it looks like Clinton won a round.
	What are you thinking about there?
	Jill Stein is up 70%.
	Sorry,.7.
	Wait a minute, that's a lot less.
	Jill Stein tonight is going, Harambe!
	We will always remember Harambe!
	And only her chest is hairier.
	I saw a meme today saying, you know, Ohio's a swing state.
	This is the state that has been tweeting Harambe memes for months and months now.
	Well, bring up another network compared to commercial.
	That way we can have the best of the networks.
	Bring it up so people can see, because we have our map and nothing's being called.
	Florida's so close.
	You guys think Florida goes Trump now?
	I think it does.
	I think I just saw some information.
	His lead's about 100,000.
	He only needs to do decent, not great, in South, South Florida to be able to take it.
	It's what I'm hearing right now.
	Okay.
	Do you have Alabama on your map called for Trump?
	Just making sure.
	Let me see here.
	Do I have Alabama?
	Not Gay Jared.
	I do not have Alabama called for Trump.
	Alabama is Trump.
	So Alabama is Trump.
	He's got up.
	He's 82.
	Donald Trump is at Alabama.
	Yeah.
	If you're playing, you know, the Connect Four game on this map, I think Trump just won the Connect Four game because of the states lining up right in a row, sort of.
	Good point.
	Good point.
	All right, Florida.
	What do we have in Florida?
	This is huge.
	49 to 48 percent with a majority of the vote coming in.
	He's a little over 100,000 higher.
	In Florida.
	They're over 90% of the vote, I believe, right now.
	Okay.
	Which is...
	But that being said, we have seen switches.
	Why does Florida do this to us?
	It seems like every time it comes down to Florida, it's just like this slow roll.
	Like, they know they're on the news, and so they just count slowly.
	It's true.
	They just milk it for everything it's worth.
	Oh, North Carolina's a lot closer.
	50-48.
	Really?
	For those who don't know.
	50-48, 1.4 million for Hillary, 1.3 million for Donald Trump.
	So that's a lot closer than it was before.
	She was overperforming.
	Colorado, nothing.
	They're still waking up from the news.
	They're still getting high.
	Yeah.
	It's...
	Ohio has Clinton had 2%, which really surprises me.
	That really surprises me.
	Honestly, the most surprising thing is to see her that far ahead of Ohio.
	I mean, I know not all the votes are in, but I really thought Trump was going to be pretty easy.
	I thought a five-point spread in Ohio.
	So that is something that is a little more surprising to me.
	Let's get up a stream here and not get Jared.
	Yeah, we've got an ad going right now.
	I think I'm actually seeing a CNN one on the old YouTube.
	So we've got NBC or sometimes ABC pops up.
	You can make fun of both equally.
	I mean, that's the great part about it.
	NBC is pretty rough.
	It is bad.
	There's plenty to talk about there.
	Thank you.
	Let's see how many we got coming in Florida here right now.
	I'm still seeing 91% is in.
	Yeah, and he's about 100,000 ahead.
	Yep.
	It's so tight there.
	So many people being made to look like fools and idiots tonight with all these things coming in.
	I think that's what you and I said was going to happen, Stephen, that no matter what, there's probably some craziness going to go on.
	We're going to scratch our heads.
	It's projected to defeat Republican Patrick Murphy.
	Who is this?
	I thought he was talking for a second there.
	NBC is now calling Rubio.
	They just called Rubio one again.
	It's like the second South Carolina win we did.
	Oh, there's Lester Holt.
	That's just a bizarre looking dude, Lester Holt.
	You sit there and you go, what is going on with that guy?
	Who is he?
	No one knows.
	How did he get that job?
	No one knows.
	Looking good in Virginia there.
	Yeah.
	Chuck Todd.
	Gosh, that face.
	He looks like Arthur's dad.
	Some people are saying, get a split, and then some people are saying, please, I beg you, no more mainstream media.
	Yes.
	Well, what do you want us to do?
	Come here precisely to avoid that.
	He can't please everybody.
	Someone tweeted me, Ty will in all, Canadian whiskey is rye whiskey.
	You can't like one but not the other.
	That's actually incorrect, Ty.
	Canadian whiskey is not rye whiskey.
	Canadian whiskey just has to have rye in it.
	It could be anywhere from 2% to 100%.
	So most of it is crap.
	And I'm Canadian.
	You know where else you can learn a lot of things like that?
	Good facts?
	Our daily show.
	Daily show.
	We haven't talked about it in a while.
	That's a lauderwithcrowder.com slash mug club.
	Yep.
	Lauderwithcrowder is going daily.
	For those who don't know, we're between states right now.
	Lauderwithcrowder is going daily.
	Mark Stein, Mark Levin, Michelle Malkin.
	Enter in the promo code STUDENT for $69 per year.
	You didn't change that there.
	You have $70 per year.
	You don't have $69 per year.
	We'll fix that.
	$60 per year.
	$69 per year for students.
	That's less than $6 a month.
	And you get Daily Crowder, Jared's show, that hopefully will...
	Won't have the technical errors that he so glaringly allows to happen on my program.
	And all of those are the programs.
	So there you go.
	Let us take hell.
	Take hell to the leftist media right now.
	Some people are having trouble with signing up.
	Mug Club subscription looks like an overloaded server.
	Which is good.
	That's fantastic.
	That's fantastic.
	Some people are trying to sign up, but, um...
	Well, unless they're being hacked by Legion guys.
	Let me do this.
	You, Gerald, you're good?
	Come in, take a seat in my chair right now.
	Sure.
	Come in, take a seat, and really, you guys carry it.
	I will be right back, because I have to make a call and make sure that we fix our servers.
	lotofcreditor.com slash mugclub.
	Everyone else handle it.
	I'm trusting that the team has my back here, because we have some server problems at the website, so please do.
	We don't.
	We don't.
	I'm just going to fail miserably.
	Because Gerald is at the helm.
	V. Gerald.
	How's it feel, man?
	Is that surreal?
	Have you dreamed of this day?
	You know, I just need a moment.
	Does it seem like just yesterday you strung those curtains up behind you?
	Guys, you've heard my voice before, but you've never really seen me.
	Oh, this is true.
	The salt and pepper beard.
	This is true.
	I never thought about that.
	Shirt.
	I mean, come on.
	This is an unexpected, delightful treat.
	I mean, really?
	Courtney, thank you for pushing for this, by the way.
	I don't know if Steven saw that, but she was like, hey, man, you need a camera.
	She also, we can't tell Steven.
	You've got to be with me on this, by the way.
	She wants me to throw a dog toy at Steven at some point during the night.
	During the night?
	During the night, yeah.
	That's fair.
	That is fair.
	Preferably on camera.
	I have to wait a little while to do that, though.
	I kind of want to survive.
	Not get killed by Stephen.
	Let's see where we're at now.
	I think we've got Arkansas that went for Trump, Connecticut for Hillary Clinton.
	You know what I love about this?
	We also have Alabama.
	When I said that a minute ago, I think there was like 3,000 total votes counted, but they were already willing to give it to Trump.
	So fast.
	We got out of control so fast.
	Does that mean that nobody lives in Alabama?
	I usually live in Alabama.
	Did you know that?
	I was born in Alabama.
	Really?
	Yeah.
	L.A. Lower Alabama.
	Sounds way cooler when you phrase it that way, but that's true.
	Lower Alabama?
	Really?
	I don't think so, buddy.
	I'm just saying.
	That doesn't sound cool no matter how you do it.
	I've been down there one time.
	They've got Talladega, and then they've got...
	A little bit of football, but I think it's kind of overrated.
	So anybody who wants to tweet me about that, bring it.
	But go Irish.
	I know we're like 2-74, but it's just a rebuilding year, maybe.
	Yeah.
	Guys, so many states are so obvious they're calling them 3% in Massachusetts.
	3% in the calling for Hillary.
	They just know it's going to happen.
	There's nothing to really worry about there.
	3% in Massachusetts.
	I'm loving that we're picking up Senate seats so far.
	That's great.
	Yeah.
	A lot of people, I mean, no matter where you come down on the Trump and Hillary thing, I know that it's a very polarizing issue right now.
	There's a lot of Republicans out there who don't really think that they can get behind somebody like Donald Trump, but then they look on the other side of the ticket and they go, oh my gosh, you've put me into a no-win situation here with Hillary Clinton.
	But, big, big, big part of governing is definitely what's going to happen with the Senate and with the House.
	Obviously, we know with the House already that that's kind of firmly in Republican hands, which is great.
	You can obviously do some work, unlike what they did when Obama was trying to push stuff through.
	I think we're a little bit more awake and alive now, and we can get at it.
	But it's big for us to keep, especially Senate.
	They have a big role in confirming justices.
	So if you're concerned about Hillary going in and nominating people that will just absolutely skew the court, you really want to make sure you pay attention to the Senate races and make sure that people are going to be held accountable in that race, or in those races that they're in.
	So I just want to see if I can hold the mug.
	Quite as good as Crowder.
	I'm surprised you can lift it up.
	It's kind of like a thorax.
	I don't know if I should drink from it.
	He did say he had AIDS earlier, right?
	And that's transmitted by bodily fluids.
	The weirder things have happened to that mug than AIDS. I'll just warn you.
	I'm just going to take this.
	I wouldn't do.
	It feels good.
	Yeah, you're safe there.
	You're safe to touch there.
	I'm going to put it down.
	Don't touch anywhere else.
	I don't want to touch the edge.
	No.
	Especially.
	You want to avoid the rim.
	It's a little frothy.
	Just his rim.
	I mean, if you order the mug...
	This is getting awkward now.
	Any mug that you get online is great.
	Okay, the other mugs have not been touched by Steven.
	They have not been tampered, not been contaminated.
	Okay, well that's...
	That one you want to look out for.
	We're going to sanitize this.
	That was a nightmare.
	Sanitizing this for the road trip.
	Yeah, bleach that.
	Just a bleach bath.
	Oh my gosh.
	Yeah, like Hillary's burial tools.
	Just bleach them.
	Yeah.
	Hide the evidence.
	I think you guys watching this, you know that it's just been one of those election cycles.
	We were out there voting today, and I shouldn't say I. I voted in Texas before I... It was one of the most pathetic things.
	I felt like people were being marched in to see if they had some kind of plague disease and then get quarantined.
	Nobody was talking.
	Heads were down.
	There weren't very many people.
	A handful, maybe five or ten people.
	Nobody really wanted to get excited about anything.
	There was no Hillary supporters out there.
	There were no Donald Trump supporters out there.
	Nobody.
	It was just kind of one of those things like...
	It's like America woke up from the hangover and realized, oh geez, we actually did that, didn't we?
	And now the consequences are kind of staring us in the face here with some of the candidates.
	And I know some people out there that are very pro-Trump and very pro-Republican.
	I've got to tell you, most of the time I am very pro-Republican as well.
	But I voted for Trump.
	I can say that in the state of Texas.
	I don't want Democrat money coming into the state of Texas.
	I don't want it to look purple.
	I don't want it to seem like there's a chance...
	By the way, all you Californians moving to Texas, do me a favor.
	Please leave your politics at the border.
	You came here for a reason.
	Don't mess our state up.
	There's a reason that you left.
	There's a reason you like it.
	I really appreciate you guys being there.
	It's great to have all those jobs.
	I understand it.
	We've been doing this for quite a while.
	They're great with the coffee.
	Glad you could catch on.
	We also have one very important thing.
	It's called water.
	It's fantastic.
	You guys are dealing with some stupidity up there.
	But I didn't want to see that happen in Texas.
	And I think it's one of those states, like we saw Colorado was firmly Republican for a very long time, started turning purple, and now it kind of flip-flopped back and forth, depending on what you're talking about.
	So don't want to see that.
	So I can say that.
	I can say it voting for Trump.
	I can say...
	That it wasn't easy.
	I went to the voting booth.
	I've never done this, Jared.
	I've never gone to the voting booth before and stood there.
	Stood there.
	Dumbfounded.
	Honestly, I was on the edge of a cliff and I didn't know whether I should jump or not.
	I know people in my family who stood there, and this has never happened before, they stood there staring at it and actually changed their answer.
	And I won't tell you who they were or which way they changed it, but it's always been a clear-cut thing.
	By the time voting day comes around, you go in, you do what you put in love for, and you make it happen.
	Hey, man, people like seeing me.
	I'm just saying.
	Yeah, it's true.
	All right, I've got to get out of here.
	I'm gone.
	Yep.
	This is the first election where I actually stood home and thought, do I shower before or after I go?
	I don't know.
	Yes, this is true.
	Sorry, everyone watching live.
	So let's tweet out another live link for people who thought that I was gone.
	Someone here is checking saying, hey, where are you?
	Do I get a free membership?
	If so, do I subscribe?
	What's the phone number here?
	For people having problems right now, here's the deal.
	So many people have been signing up for the Mug Club right now.
	We just had a server overload issue.
	So we very much appreciate you going to lotterwithcrowder.com.
	It's a good thing.
	Call 1-800-282-CRTV. 1-800-282-CRTV if you have any problems.
	Here's the problem with that.
	When you call, it will say LevinTV because we partnered with Levin.
	So now it's one umbrella, Lotter with Crowder, Levin.
	So it says LevinTV.
	That's fine.
	It's CRTV. Many people are signing up for the Mug Club.
	We're incredibly grateful.
	Thank you so much.
	I can't thank you enough.
	We are getting thousands upon thousands of people ordering right now.
	I feel like a Jairus Lewis telethon.
	We're going to trot out some sick kid.
	And they're going to, hey, look at this kid!
	Send us money!
	And hopefully Jared will be answering the phone line.
	That's very likely his next job after this.
	800-282-CRTV. Don't be scared if you hear Levin TV. Did any states get called while I was gone?
	I think Mississippi.
	I think it was just called for Trump just a second ago.
	Did we have that one in there?
	I don't know.
	I think we did have Mississippi in there.
	Yes, we do have Mississippi in there.
	Let's bring up CNN or let's see what else we have going on here.
	We got more Chuck Todd.
	Chuck Todd?
	Well, that's okay.
	Everyone expects Chuck Todd.
	As you can see here, Clinton narrowly ahead.
	Still a lot in.
	And, of course, Virginia too close to call.
	So, wow.
	Virginia has Trump up.
	The backbone states of the battleground are all too close.
	Hope you didn't make a dinner reservation.
	We're going to be here a while.
	We are going to be here a while.
	Someone said Gerald has one halva radio voice.
	He does.
	We're going to close in 14 states minutes from now.
	So, uh, looks right now like Trump might be in Virginia.
	Are they going back to a commercial?
	Yeah, they're going back to a commercial.
	What is this?
	Every time we turn into the media, they're just going to commercials.
	This is the crappiest broadcast these people, they just, all they do is commercials.
	This is kind of like just that day where you said, like, okay, how do we fill the air?
	Because we all know we're setting in for the long haul here.
	Right.
	And, uh, every news station is just, just, just cycling through the results because there's nothing else to do but wait.
	Which is why you're here, because it's more entertaining than just waiting with Chuck Todd and his stupid little, uh, aardvart face.
	Did I say that right?
	Aardvark?
	Aardvark.
	Aardvark.
	The ants.
	Aardvark.
	They're anteaters.
	I don't know.
	What's the difference between an aardvark and an anteater?
	One's probably just the proper name, right?
	I have no idea.
	I don't know.
	Someone said I'm watching the Ropers.
	This is the worst information to talk about.
	Melissa Standish says server overload is a great thing.
	Can we get a mug if we live in Canada?
	Yes, you can.
	Gerald has a serious radio voice, says fate accompli.
	Watching you guys right now, hold on to your butts.
	Never daily.
	Trump voters should turn their profile pic red to reflect the votes on Twitter and Facebook.
	I signed up during your announcement, so I beat the rush.
	So thank you guys so much for beating the rush.
	I apologize.
	Please...
	Bear with us.
	We've had server overload because of people signing up.
	We didn't expect...
	We expected a good amount, but we didn't expect this many people signing up for the Monk Club.
	That's a heck of a problem, man.
	I'm serious.
	It is a good problem to have.
	Heck of a problem to have.
	It's a good problem to have.
	Patience is a virtue.
	So...
	But I tell you what.
	It will slow down, and we will...
	Beef up.
	Again, we've had no budget, so we were launching this so you could support us.
	Now we need to beef up all the stuff which requires more budget, hence the mug clips.
	That's the Catch-22.
	We will front-load it.
	We'll beef up all the servers.
	That'll cost us a lot.
	So come back.
	If it's not working now, come back tomorrow, and you will be able to sign up, and it will be no problem.
	So, all right, Courtney is on top of it.
	When a state is called, text the state candidate winning server.
	Okay, so we know.
	So, right now, no more speculation.
	We are not going to call any states until we know exactly what is happening with that state.
	Because a lot of people are just speculating and they're not entirely sure.
	Virginia, too close to call.
	Bring us to another stream there.
	Bring us to Fox News.
	See what they're doing there, not gay, Jared.
	Let's see if we can get them loaded here.
	Let's see if we can get them loaded at the Fox News.
	I am the hoyven.
	Was that a word?
	No, I was doing Jerry Lewis.
	The nutty professor.
	You know what I'm talking about?
	Yeah, it's been a while.
	Well...
	I watch current movies.
	Well, yeah, I know.
	Transformers 4.
	The fantastic piece of...
	No.
	Gerald is looking at me going, no, no, no, don't bring me this.
	Gerald actually thinks Transformers is a good film.
	I'm not allowed to defend myself.
	I know, I know.
	He hasn't earned the right to defend himself.
	I would yell loudly and be an echo in the background if I have to.
	I do not like...
	I do not like Transformers 3 or 4.
	Yes, you do.
	No.
	You do, and you should be ashamed of yourself.
	Can't do it.
	We argued about this on a road trip one time.
	It's coming up.
	We have a world-class stream to tune in here.
	Hey, listen.
	Oh, the Young Turks.
	Oh, God.
	Dramatic differences.
	They're bifurcated, Chad.
	Just when you thought it could get worse tonight.
	One of the strongholds for Democrats is Southeast Florida.
	You know what?
	Broward and Dade counties.
	There's a ton of votes in Broward, not in.
	And it's not like there's a...
	And many of the rural counties that went for Trump, they've already been counted.
	In Virginia, where I'm stunned by the lead that Trump has, he's up 128,000 votes.
	With 73% in.
	But she's got 100,000 votes coming in Fairfax County.
	Yeah, that is true.
	What did I tell you?
	I said Fairfax County.
	I said it.
	What did I tell you?
	Of course!
	Of course!
	I said Fairfax County.
	I'm going to make it, Grease.
	Oh, God.
	So we are watching.
	Hold on.
	Let's tweet out.
	Let me tweet out.
	Or, Aaron, let's tweet out that we are live streaming the Young Turks live stream.
	So, team, let's tweet this out because, Mike...
	This is legendary.
	Oh, my gosh.
	Look at that guy who looks like Skeletor.
	It looks like he stole James Carville's soul.
	And put it...
	Look at that guy hunched over.
	And I don't know how this guy got a job.
	You know, Gerald has a good...
	That's the one who spit on Alex Jones.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	That guy got a job because he's gay with a buzz cut.
	Like, you kind of remind me of G.I. Jane, except more feminine.
	Yes!
	Let's put you on, not the main channel, let's put you on the pop culture channel.
	I want a job at E! And then Cenk just goes, I did E! This is all a lot of drama, but at the end of the day, Hillary Clinton pulls it out.
	Either pulls out Florida, pulls out Pennsylvania and Virginia.
	Okay, boy, that was a roller coaster, right?
	Look at them.
	Why doesn't someone put powder on Chank?
	I don't know.
	I think he just melts.
	Oh my gosh, they're bringing in Dave Rubin.
	We do.
	We'll connect.
	Hold on a second here.
	Let me bring in, Dave Rubin said, on Sky.
	So what that means is Dave Rubin is drunk.
	Ooh.
	Dave Rubin is drunk.
	Hold on.
	So, Gerald, you can talk.
	What is it?
	No, he's out.
	He's out.
	He's just abandoning us.
	Bring in some more beverages.
	Gerald, if that is your real name.
	Sorry, people, we're going to bring in Dave Rubin.
	In one second, is he there?
	We're connecting right now.
	Okay, we're connecting, but hold on.
	Don't bring him in yet until I introduce him.
	I have to get his card up on the Twitter.
	We're looking, we're looking, we're looking.
	I wouldn't be able to do this without you tonight, Gerald.
	We have the Rubin whenever you're ready.
	Hold on a second.
	Alright, let me make sure I get his card up with his smiling, borderline Joker-esque smile face.
	His smile wraps around his face.
	He has such a big smile.
	It's contagious, but I also think he might have some sort of a syndrome.
	Dave Rubin, are you with us, sir?
	I do have a syndrome, Crowder.
	I love politics syndrome.
	It's called caring too much!
	It's the joy of election night that I can't get over.
	You're half-bombed, aren't you?
	You're half-bombed.
	What?
	You're half-bombed at this point.
	No, I'm not half-bombed.
	I've had one beer.
	This is number two.
	We've got a long night ahead of us.
	What are you making of this thing right now?
	Beer?
	Well, I'm surprised you're drinking beer.
	I would have thought you had a Zima.
	I'm sorry.
	I'm sorry.
	I had to lead with it.
	I think Trump might pull off Florida.
	Looks like, I mean, if he doesn't win North Carolina and Florida, there's a strong chance that it's over unless he pulls out Virginia.
	I think he might pull out Florida.
	I think Virginia people are, again, with the primaries, a lot of people get really, oh my gosh, there's a lead in Virginia.
	Northern Virginia hasn't entirely been tallied yet.
	That's entirely Clinton.
	I think North Carolina might go Clinton.
	What are you making?
	Who do you think, gun to your head, who do you think wins this tonight?
	I mean, what I've been saying all week long is that if the turnout is huge, that's a win for Trump because his people have been excited.
	The Clinton people simply have not been excited, at least the way I've seen it.
	So you would have all these new people in the system that have been out of the system, that weren't being polled, all that kind of stuff.
	So I think really it comes down to turnout.
	Now, that in and of itself isn't the most interesting thing out there.
	The idea of Florida right now, he's got about a 1.5 percentage point lead with about 91% in.
	That's looking good for him.
	Yeah, it looks like he might win Florida.
	Just as you said Ohio there, they threw it up on CNN over here, and now he's taking a tiny 0.1 percentage point lead in Ohio.
	So if he gets Florida...
	And he gets Ohio.
	And even though what you said about Virginia is true, about the Northern Virginia stuff, last I saw, he was up, I think, two or three points there.
	Then this thing really starts getting...
	No, he's up five points in Virginia right now.
	So, all right.
	So, look, there you go.
	I don't know what percentage he's in on that.
	But it looks like he's going to win Texas, obviously.
	So, basically, everything's gone the way it's supposed to.
	But the swing state...
	All of them seem seriously tight.
	I mean, we've got a long night ahead of us.
	We do have a long night ahead of us.
	Yeah, I always said I thought he would win Ohio, for sure.
	I thought he would win North Carolina.
	I always said, I think, listen, he keeps Arizona.
	All the stuff that people think is a swing, I think he keeps those.
	I think he wins Ohio.
	I think he likely wins North Carolina.
	I said Florida's a toss-up.
	And I always said I don't think he wins Pennsylvania.
	Michigan is within three points.
	Virginia is five, but again, that's important for people to know the geography of Virginia right now.
	You know, the Northern Virginian votes will come in and go to Hillary.
	But even if he wins Ohio, Florida, North Carolina, he still needs Virginia, and he still needs to steal another state, whether it's Michigan or Wisconsin.
	Hold on, we might be able to call some states here.
	North Dakota, South Dakota...
	Okay, North Dakota for Trump.
	Here, bring this up, not gay Jared.
	North Dakota...
	Fargo.
	Was Fargo North Dakota or South Dakota, Reuben?
	North Dakota.
	North.
	My North Dakota team just said North.
	Okay.
	And are we confirmed on South Dakota, Wyoming, Nebraska, and Kansas?
	Yes.
	Those are all Trump?
	All Trump.
	Yeah, and Trump, I mean, look, they just showed on CNN he's up by like two points in Ohio.
	Virginia, he's up by four points.
	I mean...
	It looks like all the swing states are going slightly for him at the moment.
	I mean, it all came down to these—we knew it was all coming down to these five states.
	Nothing surprising has happened here.
	Right.
	Well, nothing surprising has happened.
	So far, except all the hangers now.
	Yeah, yeah.
	I mean, I don't know.
	This could go either way.
	Right now, it's looking pretty good for Trump.
	It'll be interesting to see what Ben says when he comes back on.
	How's he doing right now?
	Because I'm heading over there after this.
	Well, he was fine when he came on, but it was early in the night, and he thought Trump was going to lose North Carolina and Florida.
	But he admitted readily that he could be wrong on all of them.
	Yeah.
	I mean, that's the simple truth, and I'm glad that Ben said that, that the simple truth of all of this, really, at the end of the day, is that you, me, Ben, all these morons on CNN and the idiots on MSNBC and all that, nobody...
	And Young Turks.
	And well, that goes without saying, all of these people have no idea what was going to happen tonight.
	It was so obvious, even the way Nate Silver at FiveThirtyEight kept tweeting out his things and giving a thousand reasons why this year might be different.
	It's like nobody had a freaking clue.
	The Trump thing was such a wild card this year that everything is off right now and And if anyone at this point is telling you they know what's going to happen tonight, they flat out.
	Hold on a second.
	We actually have Donald Trump in, right?
	We have Donald Trump in because Texas was just called for Trump.
	Okay, we have Trump.
	And then we got Hillary in New York.
	Oh, we have Hillary.
	Who's first?
	Hillary in New York.
	Hillary got called in New York.
	We're actually connecting with her now.
	Connecting and...
	Oh, you hear that, Donald?
	That's the sound of New York values.
	Go, Hillary.
	It's your birthday.
	We're going to drink hot sauce like it's your birthday.
	And colors vote for you.
	It's your birthday.
	So there we go.
	Hillary, she seems like he's having a rough night.
	This is a rough night.
	And Texas, we have for Trump?
	We have Texas for Trump.
	Texas, call for Trump.
	Hold on, Ruben.
	Sorry to interrupt you, but we do have the potential.
	We're connecting to him.
	We're connecting to Trump in Texas?
	We're connecting to Trump, Texas.
	Ted Cruz, I'm in your backyard winning your delegates, okay?
	Oh, Jimmy Crack-Cord, I hate Ted Cruz.
	He does not like it.
	Jimmy Crack-Cord, Trump hates Ted Cruz.
	Jimmy Crack-Cord, Trump hates Ted Cruz.
	That's incredible.
	All they have to do tonight, you got to.
	Let's pretend he's a radical JFK.
	Okay?
	That's my favorite deadly.
	I'll end up with the assassinating JFK, Donald Trump.
	He needs to let go on that.
	So none of these are surprises, Ruben, but that changes.
	Obviously, that fills out the map.
	Right now, we have some nice bigger numbers.
	New York, we have 87 for Hillary.
	We have 140 for Trump right now.
	What do you think this says about the country, really?
	That these candidates are so Deeply different.
	People are voting them for so many different reasons, you know, for all the reasons that they each demonize.
	You know, we can go on to all the corruption and WikiLeaks and collusion with the media and all that shit.
	Hillary terrible and all the things that you can't really figure out what Trump's moral center is or how he'd govern or any of that kind of stuff.
	What do you make of this, then, that we are this close?
	I mean, this is actually crazy right now.
	Look, they could all break one way, in which case it becomes a landslide.
	But the fact that the numbers are this close right now is actually kind of nuts.
	It absolutely is.
	It does say, if Trump even, if with all this he still loses, I mean, he loses despite 90% of the media coverage being negative.
	Them being in bed with Hillary Clinton.
	Them dragging her across the finish line.
	Them not talking about WikiLeaks.
	So, it does say that if Trump loses, you know, I think any generic Republican would have won.
	As a matter of fact, I think Trump was the worst candidate to run against Hillary because he's the only person with the lower unfavorability rating.
	He's the only person in the history of the electorate.
	So I think at this point, I think we already would be walking off if it were like a...
	I mean, you see Rubio, how he won there in Florida.
	I think it would have been a walk-off with someone like a Rubio or a Fiorina or a Cruz.
	I don't even think it would have been close.
	So the fact that it's close says that there is a huge rejection of just accepting wholesale what the media tells you.
	Yeah, you know, I completely get that line of thinking, and I can't just flat out tell you that you're wrong, but I do think that if it had been a more standard Republican, a Rubio or a Jeb or whatever, that the same stuff that everyone's saying about Trump— Be it true or false about hating women, hating gays, being xenophobic, immigration.
	They would have been saying that stuff.
	I am all those things.
	They would have been saying that stuff about them because look what they said about Romney.
	I mean, everything being equal, Romney looks like the greatest guy on earth right now, you know?
	Here's the thing, though.
	I think you're partially right.
	I think Marco Rubio makes a huge difference in the Latino thing with Hillary Clinton and the debates.
	Trump lost the most ground in the debates.
	And I think if you would have put Rubio or Cruz or Fiorina, they would have gained ground in the debate.
	So that dip that Trump had, none of these people would have ever had that dip.
	The debates were actually far more consequential this election than most elections.
	Most people have usually made up their mind by the debates.
	You still have a lot of people who walked in today and hadn't made up their mind.
	You know, you really did.
	I talked to a lot of people today.
	People were emailing me all day saying they don't know what to do.
	I mean, what does that tell you?
	After two years of this, we've been doing this You were a young man when this started.
	You were not...
	I didn't have this gray, Ruben.
	It's all for you.
	Oh man, look at that.
	Look at this.
	Mr.
	Fantastic going on.
	Yeah.
	You know, but that's why this is so interesting.
	But I get that line of thinking, but I think Trump has done something here.
	Look, for all of us that hate the mainstream media, that think that there's such collusion with politicians and the media, that it's all been proven by WikiLeaks that how much Clinton's in bed with them and many other politicians.
	And, you know, Donna Brazile working at CNN, being a superdelegate, handing off You know, questions.
	And then Debbie Wasserman Schultz gets fired from the DNC. Where does she go to work?
	Hillary's gonna be like, everyone gets it now.
	It's all been exposed.
	And I almost think, not to say this is a reason to vote for Trump, but he was the only one that could have withstood this insanity machine where someone like Rubio, Rubio crumbled under the attacks of Trump.
	So what would he have done under the attacks of Clinton?
	I think crumbled as well, even though I think he's probably much more of a decent human being at the end of the day.
	Hey, Ruben, let me ask you, not to pull the gay card, but does this do anything for you?
	Yeah, it's upsetting me.
	Oh, God!
	He's a horrible, horrible homosexual.
	Arkansas.
	Arkansas just got called.
	Did you just see this?
	Arkansas just got called for Trump.
	Let's make sure we're caught up here, too.
	You got Vermont.
	Well, to be fair, the tipping point was all the women Bill had raped.
	So that did play a factor.
	I shouldn't have laughed that hardly at that.
	I'm not sure what happened.
	I've always said I will never run for office, but because of Donald Trump, the problem is this actually has a weird fold.
	I can't rebutton this.
	I've crossed the point of no return.
	I would maybe run for office when I'm at the point where I don't need any money.
	So if I had the point, like, I have enough money that I don't need the job, and I could go up and just be like, listen, I don't need the job.
	I'm going to do nothing.
	And if they would try it out, like, did you make a rape joke?
	And Dave Rubin laughed.
	I'm like, you know what?
	I probably did.
	Sounds like something I would say.
	And I think we are at that point where I could run and just be like, the only way I would ever run for office is if I'm old enough.
	I don't need the money.
	I don't need the job.
	I could either do this or retire.
	And I can just say, yeah, I probably said that racist thing.
	Sounds like me.
	Crowder, what do you say me and you run for president 2020?
	We can figure out the President-Vice President thing, but people seem to want us to do it.
	Oh, you want Vice President?
	I was thinking you want to go First Lady.
	How?
	I'm sorry.
	Who's writing this garbage for you?
	Oh, he's getting snippy.
	Hey, did you get the gift that I sent you, Ruben?
	I did.
	I have a Louder Recroder mug.
	I tweeted it out this morning with the Ruben Report official.
	Can I get a Ruben Report mug here, too?
	Team Ruben Report?
	There you go.
	Yeah.
	Come on, you've got to like the hand etching in there.
	We took some time with this.
	Oh, there's actual coffee in here right now.
	We just have a bunch of midgets and sweatshops making this.
	That's what you have to do.
	By the way, I just saw, it looks like the popular vote is about 2 million.
	in favor of Trump right now.
	This is the Gore situation where he loses the Electoral College.
	And then, you know, but he wins the popular vote, which would really at this point, the way the country is so frayed and especially the way the media has, you know, the way everyone in his campaign feels aggrieved by the media, which a lot of it's perfectly legit.
	Right.
	That could cause some real insanity tomorrow.
	Yeah, I thought it was more likely that she would...
	Oh, that is a nice mug.
	Although yours is less...
	They look really good together.
	His is less diverse.
	It's entirely white, so I don't...
	I'm sure we are more glorious.
	That's true.
	Well, you know, people can...
	We're going daily, so people can actually sign up at ladderwithcrowder.com slash mugclub.
	We are with...
	Bring up the screen there, Jared.
	Mark Levin, Mark Stein, Michelle Malkin, some more names to come.
	We've had server overload tonight, though.
	People trying to sign up.
	If they're students...
	There's a discount.
	So that student, enter in the word student in an EDU address, and at $70 a period, that's less than $6 a month, and people will still complain.
	But sorry about the server overload.
	Call the number that we have on Twitter.
	You did it, Carter.
	You've gone daily.
	You're hanging out with...
	Right-wing people.
	I'd like to offer you an olive branch.
	Say, this is a conservative that us liberals, we can tolerate.
	But look what you did.
	Yeah, I know.
	I know.
	I think actually people would really like Stein on the left if they listened to him a little bit.
	And Levin's brilliant.
	He calls everyone a dummy, so I don't think they'll like him.
	Wait, which Stein?
	Are we talking about Ben Stein?
	No, Mark Stein.
	He fills in for us a lot, but he's English and he has a very dry wit.
	He's a very funny guy.
	I'll tell you a little thing about Ben Stein.
	I probably shouldn't say this, but this is just us, right?
	Yeah, nobody's watching.
	I once did election coverage, I guess it was four years ago, Romney something.
	I was on Larry King with Ben Stein, and Ben Stein had a little back scratcher during commercial break, scratching his back.
	Are you sure that wasn't just Larry King's tibia that accidentally fell off?
	And he was just, Ben Stein, scratching yourself with my femur!
	That's not nice, Crowder.
	Trump's looking good in Virginia right now.
	He's up by about two and a half points or so.
	Well, if Trump wins Virginia, if he wins Florida and Virginia, that could change everything.
	Could change everything.
	I'm a little unclear, actually.
	Did you officially...
	I don't think you officially endorsed Trump, did you?
	No, no, I didn't.
	You're never Hillary, but you never actually endorsed Trump, right?
	No, I've never been never Trump, but I've never endorsed Donald Trump.
	But you said you wouldn't endorse anybody, really.
	No, I'll never endorse anybody.
	I won't do that.
	The closest...
	People thought I endorsed Ted Cruz because they had him on the show, and when it came down to Cruz and Trump, I preferred Cruz just because I think he was more of a constitutionalist, but...
	We are at a point right now where it's a horrible decision.
	I'm not happy with this night regardless of who wins.
	Honestly, I'm genuinely, and I know we'll get people who will be mad, I'm not enthusiastic about either.
	And even though people scream the loudest on Twitter, whether it's the alt-right or online, the fact is less than a quarter of the country are happy with either of these people as president.
	So I do hope that whoever wins, instead of gloating and thinking they're a majority, whoever wins tonight is not going to have 50% of the vote, and they're not even going to have 50% of their own voters who like them.
	Whether it's Hillary or Trump.
	So I hope they realize that and don't think that they're able to run roughshod over people because that's not the case.
	It's just that, you know, the supporters scream the loudest.
	You got an uh-huh from Team Rubin Report over here.
	One of the people over here.
	You got an uh-huh.
	That's the best we get around here.
	Thank you very much.
	So the people there at Rubin Report, did they vote?
	Did they go Jill Stein Harambe?
	What was the vote?
	I'm not going to tell you who my people voted for unless they want me to tell you.
	You don't have to.
	You don't have to.
	I'm not going to say because basically what I've said is pretty much what you've said.
	I've made my feelings about these people very clear.
	If you want to know what I think about, I did three and a half hours with Rogan yesterday.
	I actually mentioned you.
	I have said everything I could possibly say about these two people at this point.
	But for me to say who I voted for, it's so irrelevant because my hope is just like what your hope is, that I will grow my show the way you continue to grow your show and that I'm sure you would love to have Trump and or Clinton on over the next couple of years.
	And I would as well, whether they're president or...
	Oh, I thought you were going to try and show your nipples.
	I do that with every live stream.
	It helps.
	We're a family show.
	For a conservative, you're really confusing.
	Well, I don't know.
	I thought I'd give you a little bit of the Folsom Street Fair.
	Yeah.
	I've never been to the Folsom Street Fair.
	I don't believe you.
	You're one of the people that think that the crap that they show you on that two-minute thing at the Gay Pride Parade every year where they show some guy with a very heavy man.
	Yes, I do.
	I think you put a button up right now, and then once a year you get on a float with rubber tits.
	Yeah, never been on that float.
	Don't particularly like that float.
	No, I want to ask you that.
	Actually, seriously.
	Is that, like, really embarrassing to people like you?
	Yes, of course!
	But also Milo brings up an interesting point about this because he mocks me.
	He'll say I'm a liberal but I'm married.
	He's a conservative and he thinks gay was cool when it was this underground alternative whatever.
	I actually – there's some legitimacy to what he's saying.
	I think marriage equality is important because I think all people should be treated equally.
	I think the rights of the individual are important and if you have a right to enter a contract with a woman, then I should be able to enter a contract with a man or a woman or whatever.
	So that's why I would say that.
	But I do think the gay community generally Yeah.
	Yeah.
	And we don't have to spend election night talking about that.
	But I do think there's a risk that as you become more normalized, you actually there is a trade off.
	Everything comes with a trade off.
	And I think we're seeing that, which is why I don't know if you saw that article in the advocate that Peter Thiel is no longer gay because he's a Republican.
	And it was actually it takes a lot to offend.
	I don't really read the advocate very much.
	I'm more fond of the Pedophile Weekly, also known as Salon.
	I read that very regularly.
	It's actually one of the only things worse than The Advocate.
	I don't know about...
	Well, let me ask you this, because I want to bring it back to the election.
	Do you think...
	That in the era kind of of Trump, now all this stuff has been, you know, it's been legalized, the gay issue is kind of over.
	Do you think it frees up the, you know, the gay community to maybe look at Republicans as more of an option now than before?
	Well, of course, and it should.
	And that's the whole point of what equality will do.
	When you are actually equal, then you don't have to vote on one issue.
	Think how actually sad it is.
	If you have to vote on one issue all the time, forget marriage has to happen to something very intimate, right?
	But if you had to vote on one issue every year because you were not being treated equally under the law, that's why it was important to me.
	So yes, absolutely.
	Guess what?
	You're going to learn over the next couple of years, gay people care about taxes also.
	Gay people care about defense also.
	They care about immigration also, all those things.
	Gay people, actually, you're not going to believe this, Crowder.
	I'm going to shock you.
	You ready?
	We're just like you.
	No.
	No, you got secret meetings and you do, instead of spirit cooking, it's penises.
	Be that as it may.
	I picture Huma with a cauldron and a phallic symbol.
	Ruben!
	Yeah, that was bad even for this show.
	I'm sorry, Dave.
	Yeah, I just live-streamed for two hours.
	I told my whole audience to come here and watch a very pleasant conservative...
	I do think that's a good point, though.
	It does free people up, I think, a little bit.
	What a sad thing if you have to vote on one thing all the time, especially something like that.
	So now people...
	And that's why the Teal article in The Advocate, which has always been fighting for gay rights...
	They're suddenly saying he's not gay because he thinks differently politically, when the whole gay movement was about thinking differently.
	So it's like, we're all for diversity, except what?
	I will say that.
	You guys think outside the box, because never once have I looked at a hairy man's ass and said, there are some options.
	You know, the best part about your jokes is that I can figure them out about five minutes before.
	I know, I know.
	No, but I will say, we just kind of had to do it because we have so many different guests coming on.
	But I hope that's the case.
	I do hope that people, you know, I think they'll gain back this sort of alternative vote by the next candidate will be a black tranny.
	And I think they'll be like, look, we need another, because they need another first.
	They've had the first black guy.
	They've had the first woman.
	The next one will probably be first gay or first tranny.
	Keep in the path right now.
	Yeah, Michelle Obama's going to win a few decathlon medals and then become the...
	Look for her.
	Look for her, though.
	Something in Chicago.
	Probably a mayor of Chicago or maybe a senator.
	This must be so depressing for you, watching the age of the straight white man crumble.
	This is like, you're like a guy in Rome at the end.
	Like, guys, guys.
	Who are you, Elena Dunham?
	You think we're crumbling?
	We are rising, Mr.
	Rubin.
	Did you not see our mug?
	Look, we can still create great things.
	Mugs and walls.
	Really.
	It's nice etching.
	It's nice etching.
	Can you say who you voted for or no?
	Do you not want to?
	No, so that's why it's not important.
	You could ask me literally anything about either one of them and I will gladly tell you.
	But the point is that who I walked into that booth and voted for...
	It's irrelevant because I want one day to get both of them or either of them for a sit-down.
	And for me to show my cards in that such an obvious way.
	Yeah.
	By the way, New York Times just predicted Burr to win in North Carolina with 70%.
	So that's another local race.
	Burr in North Carolina.
	I know you don't care.
	He's up by 1.6% with 94 in.
	I mean, it's getting to that point.
	Where it's almost untippable.
	Not quite there yet.
	Well, we tuned into the Young Turks livestream earlier and they were telling themselves that there are going to be a lot of votes coming in for him in Florida.
	I don't think he'll win Virginia.
	I still don't think he'll win Virginia.
	I haven't seen an update since we last talked about it, but we'll see.
	Do you have a TV up there?
	Do you have an update thing up there?
	Yeah, it's up there.
	Oh, okay.
	That makes sense.
	By the way, Potter, you know, it's very exciting.
	I'm excited for all your success, and it's been nice being on this little adventure with you.
	I'm building a home studio myself.
	It's going to be right down the hallway, right over there.
	Just moving this week.
	Yeah.
	Well, we're not building a home studio.
	We're building it in a bunker.
	I don't know why you would say that.
	So we're building it actually.
	We're actually working with the FBI. I don't know what you're talking about with a home studio.
	Are you having Alice Jones actually fortify it with the vitamins and all that shit?
	Well, because the frogs are gay, Ruben.
	The water is making the frogs gay.
	I did Alex's show, and I think Alex is crazy on some issues, but he's been very kind to me, and his son is a fan of mine.
	Kind of like you, I don't have to agree with...
	I mean, I've had Sally Cohn on the show.
	I have you on the show, and you're disgusting.
	So I will have anyone on the program...
	And I will go on anyone's show as long as I won't lie about it.
	And I feel like the first time I did your show, you said you got so much hate mail.
	I think I was one of the first people who just went on your show and was just kind of unapologetically, like, this is it.
	And yeah, that's fine.
	Let the cards fall where they may.
	I think more people are that way now.
	I got a ton of hate for having you on the show.
	And that's what I said to you after, I think, privately.
	I said, you know, that's exactly why I'm trying to take the left to task here.
	Because...
	Someone like you, yeah, I disagree with you on some stuff, but the whole point is we're not that different at the end of the day.
	You know what I mean?
	Now you're going to show me your nipple and talk about man-ass or something, but we're not that different.
	You know what I mean?
	We're not enemies, even though we disagree on some stuff politically.
	No, I defend you all the time with people.
	Honestly, I would say, you know, Ruben's a good guy.
	But I'm an actual good person.
	Someone who I would trust with information if I needed to.
	And we are going to do the hashtag.
	We have to go because we actually, well, I'm sure you're a fan.
	We have Dean Cain coming up next.
	We have hashtag gift a gun.
	We are going to do with you.
	Well, it's because of election season, so we are going to do it here.
	Hashtag Gift of Gun with you.
	That's going to be a video.
	Might even be only for Mug Club members, but we'll do more exclusive behind-the-scenes things with Ruben.
	I am working with a couple of companies here to get you a really nice firearm, but California has a lot of red tape to cut through.
	Yeah.
	So I'll go out there.
	We'll not only get you a firearm, but you'll see the process, and we'll take you through firearms training courses.
	Maybe if Trump wins, who knows?
	Maybe there'll be a constitutional carry mandate, and all of a sudden, California's fair ball.
	This is what I'm going to do for you.
	How much ballpark do you think the gun will cost?
	How much are you going to have to pay for this?
	Or just how much...
	I might be able to get a sponsor.
	But let's say you were paying.
	Give me a ballpark.
	Probably between $400 and $700.
	All right.
	Here's what we're going to do.
	I'm going to double that number.
	I will send to you, because I'm a liberal.
	You're the conservative sending me a gun.
	I will send you $1,400 worth of weed.
	Well, I think Ruben probably voted absentee in Colorado.
	I think he did.
	So I appreciate you very much coming in.
	And I tell you what, you know, it's funny.
	I've never actually, most people, I've never smoked weed.
	I know, that would explain your jokes.
	Good lord.
	Good lord.
	Insults you on your own show.
	He just insults me on air.
	On your own program.
	And the truth is, he doesn't have any jokes.
	He just smiles.
	25,000 people watching.
	He just smiles and I forgive him.
	Have you ever been...
	You must know you have a very...
	And it's a good thing, but you have abnormally defined dimples.
	People say I look happy all the time.
	It's just the way it's always been.
	It's the way it's always been.
	Well, people pay a lot of money to get that done when they get older.
	Because it makes your cheeks look more full.
	You know, I can tell you, Mike, I don't have a guy.
	I've never had any work done.
	I've lived in LA for three years.
	I've never had any work done.
	Oh, come on.
	You have plenty of guys.
	Ruben, where's the best place for people to find you?
	YouTube.com slash RubenReport.
	RubenReport.com.
	It's on iTunes, all that other stuff.
	My branding guy's good.
	And I'm going to go hang out with Shapiro now.
	I'm going to console him.
	Slash RubenReport.
	And as we go daily, you know, listen, we're going to have more regular guests kind of rotating in, so you'll have your home studio.
	It'll be easy, and we'll have you on quite a bit more.
	I always love having you on, brother.
	All right, man.
	Thank you, Ruben.
	God bless America.
	Thank you.
	You as well.
	Have a good evening.
	And everyone there at the Ruben Report, the team doing great work.
	We very much appreciate it.
	Anything new?
	Let me check here.
	What do you have, Gerald?
	Detroit Free Press is actually projecting Michigan for Hillary.
	Did they call it or they're projecting?
	They didn't call it, projected it.
	So if it holds, that's big.
	It's big, if it holds.
	See, then I'm looking, and Google is wrong, because Google right now has Michigan has Trump 49-46.
	Well, this is Detroit Free Press.
	They could be skewing things.
	They did kind of screw stuff up in Detroit.
	Well, I've also only got an estimated 16% in right now from Michigan.
	Are you using CNN? I'm using CNN. Yeah.
	Okay.
	So, same thing with, let me look here at CNN. Let's make sure we have our thing updated, too.
	Jamie Dupree says he thinks you can call Florida for Trump.
	That would be big.
	Well, we don't know for sure if we can call Florida for Trump.
	That's why I'm saying just Jamie's saying that.
	94% in.
	But he is ahead of about 200,000.
	Well, he says he doesn't see enough votes still out for Clinton.
	Jamie Dupree is a pretty good source on a lot of this stuff.
	Somewhere Karl Rove is soiling himself.
	He's saying, no!
	It can't be happening!
	Talking thumb Karl Rove.
	What do you have?
	We have Florida.
	We have 94% of the vote in Connecticut.
	Clinton.
	Jared, let's bring this up on the map.
	Connecticut.
	Clinton.
	You're disconnected.
	You need to reconnect to my computer there.
	I got it right here.
	Let me see what I got here.
	Let me bring it back up.
	Let me reconnect here.
	And let's go to another feed again.
	Let's go back to CNN or something.
	Hold on, let me bring this up.
	Jared, let's bring up another feed so people can see it.
	Sorry, let's bring up the Young Turks feed.
	Let's exclusively use the Young Turks feed.
	You should have my screen to see what they're saying.
	So Connecticut, we just put this up.
	I have this map here.
	Connecticut for Clinton.
	146 for Trump.
	So someone is saying we can call Florida for Trump.
	I think it's Jamie Dupree.
	Jamie Dupree is a reliable source.
	Ben Shapiro already called Florida Trump.
	I'm telling you, these guys follow this stuff, and they're not out there trying to put one way or the other.
	So if he's calling it, I trust this guy.
	Do you want to do it?
	Do you want to pull it?
	I mean, not gun-to-my-head trust, but...
	Nearly 3.8 million votes so far in North Carolina.
	Trump 49, Clinton 46.
	That's good.
	That's a three-point spread.
	Let's see what the Young Turks are saying.
	Are they calling?
	Yeah, let's see what the Young Turks are calling.
	They're calling the opposite.
	And like little things, Wisconsin and Michigan, they're still early, but he's winning in both Wisconsin and Michigan.
	And all of this is consistent, which is a point that I try to make often, which is these things don't happen in a vacuum.
	Like if Trump made up six points in Virginia, he probably made up points in Wisconsin and Michigan and New Hampshire and all these other places.
	Mark, go ahead, sorry.
	The fact that we're sweating in Virginia is in itself a flashing red light.
	Is that Kevin Nealon?
	We're worried about things that you wouldn't normally think we'd be worrying about.
	And Ben, on the count, those suburban areas of Virginia, there are more votes there than in the entire state of Virginia, I think.
	There's no question that's where the most votes are, but we've counted a bunch of them.
	They're already counted.
	So somewhere, she's got to find 61,000 votes.
	And there aren't 61,000 votes.
	She can find them in her emails.
	There aren't 61,000 votes in Richmond.
	Can we get Gerald some headphones at all?
	Is there any way to get him something?
	There's not, unfortunately.
	Sorry, Gerald.
	You don't have any headphones.
	So Gerald can't hear what we're watching right now.
	The budget's expanding, though, right?
	The budget is expanding.
	There's no reason to believe at this point that it's only her counties left in Virginia.
	Before there was reason to believe that.
	Hold on.
	Now there is not as much reason to believe that.
	And by the way, there's two ticking time bombs here.
	One is this lead in these states.
	The other is percentage reporting.
	So every time I see one more percentage reporting in Florida and Virginia, and he's still holding his lead, By the way, we can call Louisiana Trump right now.
	So I've got that, calling that Trump right now on our map.
	Calling it Trump, calling it Trump, calling it Trump.
	Letting you know, louderwithcrowder.com slash mugclub.
	We have gone daily, daily Crowder, daily show.
	You want to watch us daily?
	We're going to bring you daily.
	And right now we'll take on the Young Turks.
	Right now we'll be doing a live stream with the Young Turks.
	We only need a small percentage of folks to subscribe.
	Students, that's $70 for the year.
	$69 for the year.
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	Promo code STUDENTS. $99 for the year.
	For normal people, that's still under $7 a month.
	And we had some server overload earlier.
	So just hit ladderwithcredder.com and you should go to the Mug Club.
	And you can sign up there.
	You get access not only to this great mug, but Levin, Stein, Malkin.
	Building up a network the likes of which you have never seen.
	Doesn't matter who wins this election.
	Politics is always downstream from culture.
	Media, entertainment, that is what will matter going into 2020.
	Because, listen, if Donald Trump wins tonight, the media attack is going to be something you have never seen.
	You thought they were rough on Bush?
	Just see what they do with Donald Trump.
	It's going to be absolutely insane.
	We've got special guests with us.
	You ready for our next guest?
	Oh, hold on a second.
	Hold on.
	No, no, no.
	I'm not ready because I have to...
	We will tweet this thing out right now.
	Well, you know what?
	Let's just have our team tweet him out with your card.
	Okay?
	So we actually have...
	You know him.
	You love him.
	Even though he's inappropriate and sometimes he calls in, but he has a concession probably speech tonight.
	Him and Hopper didn't win.
	Dean Cain.
	We didn't win?
	You didn't win.
	Well, you weren't on the ballot in any 50 states.
	Nor Puerto Rico.
	So I don't know.
	Your ground game wasn't strong, Dean.
	Hopper told me we looked good.
	Yeah, I know, but he'll do anything for cheeses, so he probably lied to you, and you probably gave him up.
	I gave him cheeses!
	You gave him Google.
	Hold on a second.
	Hey, Dean, do you want my...
	Jared, let's bring up CNN so Dean can react.
	Oh, there you go.
	Look at Dean Cade has the mug club there.
	Whoa!
	Look at he's got his Not Gay Jared shirt behind him.
	There you go, Not Gay Jared.
	Dean, hold on a second.
	We have to bring up CNN while you're on with us.
	Jared, bring this up.
	Apparently some things are happening right now on CNN and they're melting down, which is...
	Do we have it?
	No, we don't have CNN. They don't have the feet up.
	Oh, they don't have the feet up?
	No.
	Oh, we can't get on CNN. Never mind.
	Dean, are you watching this tonight?
	Is it a nail-biter, or are you at the point where you just kind of don't care?
	You're enjoying it.
	I just watch the entertainment.
	It is entertainment.
	I am watching, and I'm very, very carefully watching.
	I flew in from Michigan today back home in order to vote and make sure that I was on this podcast, which finally is daily.
	Yes, exactly.
	Well, I know.
	Call in every day?
	No, we'll try and schedule it.
	Let us take the lead with that.
	Alright, alright.
	Let us take the lead, Dean.
	I appreciate how overzealous you are.
	I'm excited.
	I'm a little excited.
	So tonight, I'm watching very, very carefully.
	Someone stopped me when I got off the plane.
	TMZ guy stopped me and asked me a bunch of questions.
	I guess he was TMZ. And I was saying that if it was really close, I thought Hillary would win tonight.
	But it was such a weird cycle that everybody is predicting Hillary, Hillary, Hillary, and all of a sudden it's not looking that way 100%.
	So I really don't know what to think.
	I'm happy it's going the way it's going so far.
	Jared, bring up any network right now.
	Trump is pulling ahead fast from what I'm hearing.
	Do you know who hasn't had a cycle in about 100 years?
	What?
	Do you know who hasn't had a cycle in about 100 years?
	A cycle?
	What are you talking about?
	A cycle.
	What?
	A menstrual cycle.
	Oh!
	What was this?
	Was that your joke?
	It was a joke.
	Okay.
	Bring up any...
	Dean is like, what?
	And he thought mine were bad with Ruben.
	No, they're pretty good.
	Bring up a feed anywhere there, Jared.
	Apparently he's pulling ahead in here pretty quickly on some things.
	He's honing in.
	What do you have, Gerald?
	What does?
	The New York Times.
	Oh, New York Times has 53% chance of Trump winning now.
	Right now.
	Right now.
	It changes in minutes.
	So, Dean, this is happening by the minute, but we just tuned into the Young Turks broadcast, and oh my gosh, they were about to swallow a knife.
	Yeah, I saw that.
	Yeah, they did.
	It's shocking, because they know everything.
	What do you think is going to happen in Hollywood?
	Do you think people are going to lose their minds, or do you think it's been mostly grandstanding, they'll move on?
	Do you think Amy Schumer will move to Canada?
	Do you think any of these people will move to Canada?
	Well, you were born in Montreal, right?
	Yeah, I know.
	They'll just show up and be like, oh my gosh, Canada's awful, and the Canadians will say, look, more tax revenue.
	Hey!
	Yeah.
	That's exactly what they were hoping for.
	I don't think anybody's going to leave.
	I think everything will be just fine, because they're not...
	They won't stand by their word.
	They say something like that.
	It's total grandstanding.
	I think it's baloney.
	But if they do, that'll be kind of fun to watch.
	Apparently, Dean Cain is a 95-year-old neighbor as well.
	I think it's baloney!
	I'm giving you the evil eye!
	I do have a 95-year-old neighbor.
	Oh, do you?
	I do.
	Chuck!
	Chuck!
	I have one named Art.
	Chuck and Art.
	Those don't sound like young kids.
	Art will go through my mail without me even asking.
	It's a federal offense, but, you know, we let it slide.
	I think old people break the law a lot, and it's okay.
	You can get away with it.
	Do we have any stream, Jared?
	We do, but do you really want to watch this guy?
	Why is Brokaw on television again?
	No one knows.
	Hey, look at this.
	It looks like the Republicans are definitely probably going to keep the Senate.
	Lester Holt looks like generically ethnic Tom Brokaw.
	I can see that.
	I can see that.
	Like, I think he sat down with Tom Brokaw and said, hey, hey, listen, can you give me some style tips?
	He said, well, it's really important that you dress in a way that is completely out of touch with the common man.
	Man.
	Also, um, wait, no, that wasn't, that was, was that Tom Brokaw?
	Was that Tom Brokaw?
	I don't know.
	I always get Tom Brokaw and Dan Rather confused.
	That was Tom Brokaw, right?
	Yeah.
	Dan Rather's the one who forged all the crap.
	Yeah.
	Oh, gosh, I tell you, what a, what a night.
	So, okay, Trump wins, you wake up tomorrow.
	What's, what is Dean Cain thinking?
	Yeah.
	I think, good, shake it up.
	Let's see something different happen.
	Listen, I really can't stand the political class.
	I really can't stand professional politicians.
	I don't like it.
	I'm a big, big proponent of term limits, and I'd like to see some things change.
	And if Hillary gets elected, I don't think things will change.
	And if Donald Trump gets elected, I think things are going to change.
	So that would be kind of exciting and fun.
	What happens if Hillary wins when you wake up?
	It's Wednesday.
	Same old day and you're slightly...
	He's already in California.
	It doesn't get much worse.
	Well, you know, there's really not a whole lot that he can do for California unless there's some kind of, you know, signing into law constitutional carry.
	That would be kind of nice.
	Constitutional carry like...
	Yeah, like carry a firearm.
	Yeah, a few states recognize...
	Is that a Glock?
	19.
	Yeah, but it's a Glock 19, but it's useless because you can only have the...
	Was it 10-round magazine?
	Is it 10-round magazine or is it a 9-round magazine plus one in the chamber?
	Yeah.
	Well, this, I'm not going to speculate on that because I have mine here and I hope it's legal.
	And I'm at home, so I can do what I want.
	Yes, Dean Cain has his bullet button, everybody, on all his rifles.
	Don't think that he doesn't for a second.
	That's correct.
	That bullet button.
	Gosh.
	I mean, if you didn't work in the entertainment industry, when you retire, you're going to leave California, right?
	Um, let's see.
	We have a huge state tag.
	The only thing about California is that I came from Michigan this morning.
	It was, you know, kind of nice.
	Where were you in Michigan?
	I was in Auburn Hills.
	I was working.
	I shot a film.
	Okay.
	Well, you know, the last stop for the Trump campaign trail was Michigan.
	Coincidence?
	In Grand Rapids, Michigan.
	Yeah, and Hillary Clinton was there at 4 o'clock.
	Michigan's still up for grabs.
	It is up for grabs.
	What's funny is I think the conservatives in Michigan aren't really voting for Trump in the same numbers.
	And what scares me is the big union members because he said he's going to punish Ford.
	And, you know, that's what bothers me with, like, the Sean Hannity, the disingenuous...
	While they're living it up on Wall Street, they're shutting Detroit down.
	I'm like, well, they should shut Detroit down and Wall Street down.
	You shouldn't bail out any of them.
	And Ford should be free to set up a plant in Mexico if it allows them to employ another 8,500 Americans, which they promised.
	They've employed another 20,000 since 2011.
	And if I were Ford, I would move to Texas.
	So I don't like that a lot of the union members, the reason they're voting for Trump is because Trump has promised them effectively handouts.
	That is something that scares me a little bit.
	That makes good sense.
	That being said, I have a Ford Raptor sitting in my driveway.
	Well, Fords are fine, but they're the ones...
	A good example, Fords were the ones who didn't want to take the bailout money, and then they had to, right?
	They didn't have a choice.
	And so I think if Ford did that, and Ford grew and Ford employed people, if Ford wants to set up a plant in Mexico and that allows them to employ more Americans, we shouldn't hit them with a 35% tax, making them unable to compete with...
	Toyota is in Texas now.
	Toyota and Honda, these Japanese cars, employ just as many Americans.
	People don't know that.
	Yeah, I think rhetoric on the campaign trail and the reality of what you're in office is just different.
	Yeah.
	All right, well, we're going to have to let you go here pretty soon.
	Dean Cain, best place to be able to find you on...
	Well, no, you can stick around if you want.
	Hold on, Gerald, what's...
	New Mexico for Clinton.
	New Mexico for Clinton.
	All right, let me put this up.
	Oh, really?
	I have one other thing.
	I think you called the Hopper Cane thing just a little bit too soon.
	We have Guam and Puerto Rico reporting.
	Jurassic on Twitter says he's calling it.
	He's calling it for Hopper Cane 2016, baby.
	There you go.
	It was called a little early.
	I can't hear you, but I can see you talking.
	Hopper is seven and a half.
	So, chances are he'll make it through the entire...
	Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
	He's in good health.
	We just gave him a knee surgery.
	He's running around like it's his job.
	Well, right now he's sleeping like he's home with us.
	He's resting up for the presidency.
	He's resting up for the long ride.
	You know, we're going daily.
	It's a lotofcrowder.com slash mugclub.
	Once we finish this tonight, we tear down the studio, we drive across the country, a whole new studio.
	So, it's a busy 48 hours for us.
	Yes.
	Yeah, it'll be a good time.
	And whenever you're around, we'll have you live in there.
	It is...
	Come on.
	That's a nice mug.
	Quality mug.
	Sam Rubin looks like a sweet, nice guy, whatever, but his mug, in comparison, no.
	Not even close.
	Hand etched.
	Like I said, we have Barack Obama's half-brother working full-time.
	He's doing this with an old...
	You want to see something very funny, though, as I take a sip?
	Can you see what's written on the bottom of that right there?
	I was going to say, made in China.
	Mine doesn't say anything.
	I can't see.
	We can't see.
	This is not Hollywood.
	The camera isn't...
	What does it say?
	What does it say?
	China?
	China.
	That's because it's China.
	It is China.
	It's China.
	You put it in your China cabinet.
	What are you trying to do?
	It works perfectly well, and it's a great mug.
	It works perfectly well, and I tell you what, because it's made in China, the actual mug, and then it comes here and it gets hand-etched by Americans, and Brandon is able to sell these himself.
	He employs a bunch of Americans actually out there in Vegas, and he creates the T-shirts.
	So I'm not an economic protectionist.
	I'm totally fine with employing more Americans by getting some stuff less expensive.
	Have you seen the Chinese try to do the etching?
	No.
	It's not good.
	Yep.
	Your language is not complex enough.
	I can't do the curvature.
	And then they drown a baby, and you're like, you don't need to do that all the time, China.
	Get your act together.
	Sorry, Dean, you're part Asian.
	We should have realized.
	Oh, yeah, but I'm Japanese, so still, let's make fun of the Chinese.
	This is true.
	That is kind of, you know what, that's our failsafe.
	If they all get nukes, you know, as Donald Trump has talked about, the Japanese and the Chinese hate each other so much that it's kind of a stalemate.
	It is.
	I was recently in China.
	Really?
	Did it suck?
	My eyes burned a lot.
	That's it.
	Just from the pollution?
	Where were you?
	Were you in Hong Kong?
	Were you in Shanghai?
	I was actually in the Henan province, which is kind of in the...
	It's east.
	No, it's west.
	Do you just pick your projects based on vacation?
	Like, I was shooting in Spain.
	I was shooting in China.
	I was in Montreal.
	It seems to me like you're just picking like, yeah, I'll go shoot.
	Where are you going to take me?
	Are you going to take me to Portugal?
	Yeah, I'll go shoot there.
	Actually, half the time I don't even know where I'm going.
	I just get on a plane.
	Show up there.
	That's it.
	Your agent just says, just get your sweet tuchus over there on the plane.
	You'll be on the beach in no time.
	Just grab your parka and your G-string.
	Just prepare for anything.
	Hold on, Gerald.
	Who doesn't have those all together all the time?
	I think Gerald has to call into the state.
	False alarm.
	False alarm.
	So nothing's being called right now.
	No, but the trend is up in Ohio, up in...
	Trump, you mean?
	Yeah.
	Trump is going up in Ohio and North Carolina in the last 30 minutes.
	Stable in Florida.
	Shrinking in Virginia right now.
	Shrinking in Virginia.
	Yeah.
	I mean, every...
	Anybody signing up for the mug clump?
	Sorry.
	Every media pundit that I heard called it big time for Clinton all the way through.
	So it's kind of interesting to hear the night go this way.
	That's all I have to say.
	Yeah.
	If he loses Virginia, then he still needs to steal Michigan or Wisconsin.
	So that doesn't change a whole lot.
	You said he's up in North Carolina?
	He's up in North Carolina and Ohio and gaining more votes.
	So he's expanding his lead right now.
	And he's up in Florida.
	So he's probably going to get Ohio, North Carolina, Florida.
	How's he going to do in California?
	That was one thing I thought was funny when they were like, ah, he's going to win California and New York.
	Listen, he'll change some of the map, but let's not get ahead of ourselves.
	There's no way he's winning California because of three or four cities.
	Well, they say that 80% of the vote in California is actually south of San Francisco.
	Yeah.
	Which is interesting.
	Not that interesting.
	But I will say, San Francisco, whenever I talk to people, like, oh my gosh, don't you just love San Francisco?
	I just say, no.
	And they never know how to respond.
	They expect it.
	I'm like, oh yeah, I love it.
	And I say, no.
	I'm a wine guy.
	I have to love it.
	It's the gateway to Napa and Sonoma.
	Come on, man.
	Just go to Napa and Sonoma.
	Yeah, exactly.
	Just go to Napa and Sonoma.
	Yeah, it's the gateway to Napa and Sonoma.
	You can't fly to Napa and Sonoma.
	You can fly to Sacramento or you can fly to Oakland.
	God knows who would fly to Oakland on purpose.
	And then you have San Francisco and San Jose.
	I mean, you've got to go through San Francisco.
	Well, Dean Cain has his own plane, I'm pretty sure.
	Ah, see, I can only see your mouth moving.
	I can't hear words, you know?
	No budget.
	There's no budget.
	Daryl doesn't have headphones because, again, we're tearing down the studio.
	That's right, yeah, he has his own plane.
	He doesn't so much have his own plane, so much as he gives John Travolta a massage while John Travolta...
	747 is kind of big for the five of us.
	Strong hands.
	And Travolta goes, Oh, Dean!
	This is the propeller plane.
	Wait until we get on a jet.
	One thing about John Travolta, what happened with his...
	I'm sure you probably noticed this because you're a student of it as an actor.
	John Travolta, this is Sandy!
	And now he talks borderline like Caitlyn Jenner.
	What happened with his voice?
	Did he have his jaw wired shut?
	Who knows?
	Who knows?
	But, you know, Hollywood loves a comeback.
	And he was gone for a long time.
	And then came back and he's had a second career.
	And I'm interested to see what the third career is going to be.
	Well, I think it's going to be as...
	Maybe it'll be as Cateman.
	I don't know.
	I think it's going to be as a masseuse.
	And I think he'll be quite good at it, believe it or not.
	He might be.
	Hold on.
	What are you saying, Gerald?
	New York Times now, that average I told you about was 52% or 53% is now 59% chance of Trump winning as of 941.
	59% of Trump winning.
	Keeps edging that way.
	Keeps edging up.
	Wow.
	Oh my gosh.
	Young Turks right now, they're cutting themselves.
	They're trying to find double-edged safety razors because they probably don't even have them.
	Most people just to cut themselves.
	I was going to say, what if there's a live suicide?
	What if that happens on the Young Turks?
	Well, there's a very strong possibility.
	I think there's a strong possibility of, at the very least, career suicide for a lot of the media right now.
	I mean, what do they do?
	I always give it a 60-40 chance for Hillary to win, but people who completely wrote him up.
	Even more interesting, let's play the game of which state is Jill Stein breaking through the 1% mark in?
	Okay, Dean, which state do you think Jill Stein is breaking the 1%?
	I guess somewhere...
	The one's in play right now.
	New Hampshire?
	I would say Oregon.
	Michigan.
	Really?
	Really.
	Gosh.
	There are more dumb people in Michigan.
	They saw Stein and they thought Beer Stein.
	So, okay, I'll vote for that lady.
	It's got to be good.
	10,000 votes.
	Beer City USA. 10,000 votes for Jill Stein.
	Man, Michigan.
	The city of my birth.
	The state of my birth.
	Now, which city were you born in in Michigan?
	Mount Clemens.
	Macomb County.
	Oh, okay.
	Do you still have family in Michigan?
	No, no.
	They couldn't handle it.
	It was all military family.
	They couldn't handle the weather.
	Okay, well, Dean, listen, thank you so much for coming on in the mug.
	We will have you on the program more regularly.
	Not good here.
	Do you have anything you two need to talk about?
	No, I think we'll talk later.
	Talk later.
	Yeah, call me.
	I'll call you.
	Dean Cain, thank you so much for joining us.
	We appreciate it.
	We must get back to calling states.
	Okay, let me see what we have here.
	Jared, bring up a stream from either NBC or anywhere.
	Clinton now at 5% in Virginia with 89% reporting.
	That worries me with that trend.
	But we may be...
	It may be Michigan.
	Michigan is going to be the linchpin.
	If he wins Florida and North Carolina and Ohio...
	We're going to be sitting here waiting on Michigan.
	And Lester, nobody was talking about Michigan five days ago.
	I wouldn't discount Pennsylvania yet, but I still would rather be her than him.
	All right, let's go to Hallie Jackson now.
	Hallie?
	One second here.
	Hey, Lester, I'm joined here by filmmaker Michael Moore, who has spent months really diving into...
	Oh, no!
	No!
	There's a frog!
	Look, what happened to his neck?
	His shoulder just...
	It looks like Pepe just kind of drowned.
	It's all inflated.
	Well, back in the summer I wrote an essay called The Brexit States, Michigan, Ohio, Pennsylvania, that the working class that has been so abused and attacked and their livelihood taken from them over these last really couple decades, they're at the point where they're so angry and full of so much despair that I could see that they were going to use the ballot box as an anger management exercise.
	You've called it a middle finger to the establishment.
	Yes, or Trump being their human Molotov cocktail.
	He has been interesting to hear and listen to on Trump.
	Very interesting.
	That is a very bizarre look.
	He's kind of got the Trump Jr.
	look on it.
	That long hair in the back, that swoop on the front.
	He has no idea how to rebuild it.
	He might have a hero.
	He looks like the junk lady Muppet from Labyrinth.
	Oh gosh, my internet is going out here, so the Twitter stuff.
	Not at all.
	No, I mean, this has been my fear.
	I've been trying to tell people we have to put special focus on Michigan, Ohio, Pennsylvania.
	It's the last place you would have expected it to.
	I know what's going on here.
	They're being manipulated by a con artist.
	That's what Donald Trump is.
	He has not told them the truth.
	Oh, come on, Michael.
	Your brother says he looks like a lesbian to Walter White.
	He's a dying dinosaur.
	His way of doing things.
	And that's the old America.
	We're into it.
	Seriously.
	Look at Michael Moore.
	He looks like he might be scissoring.
	Thank you very much.
	Former Bernie Sanders supporter.
	Now a Hillary Clinton supporter.
	Louisiana.
	Other side.
	I can't.
	Louisiana just went Trump.
	Did we already call it?
	Yeah, we already called Louisiana Trump.
	All right.
	We already called Louisiana Trump internet as-is slowing, slowing, slowing, slowing, slowing, slowing, slowing, slowing.
	If any students are out there trying to get it, it's lowercase student.
	It should be work if it's uppercase.
	Promo code.
	Lowercase student, just making sure everybody knows that.
	Does that card work, Jared, now?
	Yep, it works.
	Okay, hold on a second.
	Gerald and Jared, you talk for a bit like that.
	You guys have crashed pretty much their website with all the stuff signed up.
	That's awesome.
	A lot of Chinese people making, but, I love it, a lot of Americans etching, doing the finishing touches, the nice stuff.
	That's what matters.
	And disinfecting, because Crowder's touched a lot of these, and so we don't want to spread the disease.
	Florida's in 95%, so it's still close enough, though it is definitely favoring Trump.
	What else we got?
	We got Ohio.
	He could be pulling off a miracle.
	He really could.
	That's not a miracle, though.
	It wasn't that much of a long shot.
	I think it was a pretty big long shot.
	I really do.
	I think a lot of people thought maybe he would take a couple of those swing states or the states that he needed.
	Let's put Ohio firmly in his category.
	If you look at the Ohio map right now, what's coming in?
	Precisely Toledo, Cleveland, Columbus, and Cincinnati areas are firmly blue.
	Everything else is red.
	Everything else is red.
	It's on CNN. That definitely makes sense.
	I spent about four years there.
	I did some time in Ohio.
	Well, that's the nature of Ohio.
	Lorain County still coming in.
	Hasn't been called yet.
	Leaning Hillary.
	That'll go Hillary.
	And then you've got basically a couple counties around Columbus.
	I've got this up on my screen here, Jared, if I need to.
	And Trump is ahead.
	Gosh, he's ahead almost by 10 in Ohio.
	Yep.
	By 10%.
	Great.
	Yeah, with 65% of the vote in.
	So, Jared, you know Ohio.
	Does that mean...
	Oh, sorry.
	Thanks, CNN, for all your ads.
	Does this mean here, are there any liberal counties yet to come in, or do you think the liberal counties have come in?
	Those have come in.
	I mean, everything else is so rural there.
	The only one that's got some liberal to it is Oberlin.
	It's pretty heavy there, but I think that's in liberal.
	Yeah, because of the college and stuff like that.
	But other than that...
	No, I think...
	Do you think Ohio's pretty much settled?
	I think it's pretty settled for Trump.
	Yeah.
	I can't see anything else coming into play that would flip that.
	You've got one county...
	Well, even the counties that are around Toledo and Columbus that could, you know, are close enough to the cities, they're leading Trump.
	Yeah.
	This is big.
	No, I disagree with Gerald.
	I don't think this is a miracle.
	I always thought it was.
	I always said, like, I'd give him a 60-40 shot.
	No way.
	I mean, this would just shock the heck out of me, honestly.
	I didn't think everything would line up.
	If he ends up doing what he needs to do to win tonight, it would take so many things kind of lining up for him.
	And going against some of the poll averages that you and I both looked at, that we said, uh...
	Yeah, that doesn't look all that great.
	Jamie Dupree just tweeted out again that it looks like Trump's going to take it there.
	Briar County in Florida is almost all in, which is one of the big heavy counties for the Democrats.
	And her lead has only increased a touch from that.
	Yeah, so he's still about 1.2 points ahead of her.
	Yeah.
	In Florida.
	Tight, tight race.
	So Florida looks like it's him.
	Michigan is leading, but there's not enough of the vote in there in Michigan.
	Virginia is still tight.
	Yeah.
	Virginia is still tight.
	Trying to see with Michigan.
	Well, here's the deal.
	Michigan, they don't have Detroit in yet.
	Oh boy.
	So it's Grand Rapids is the main portion, and yet they don't have that whole Saginaw, Detroit area.
	Crap.
	So they have Lansing, but they don't even have the counties north of Lansing.
	So right around Lansing, right around Detroit.
	So people, you need to understand...
	That'll answer you if it's the big unions, you know, in Michigan.
	Someone said they thought he might win Wisconsin.
	I don't think we're close enough here with Wisconsin.
	Bring up a broadcast, Jared.
	We only have 25% of the vote in.
	He's ahead in Wisconsin.
	Four points.
	Trump winning in Wisconsin by 39,000 right now.
	Clinton headquarters just doing their thing.
	Oh, well, Rhode Island.
	Yep.
	That's been called for a while.
	New York Times giving Trump a 58% chance of winning Michigan.
	She looks like she's dying on the spot.
	What's the 104 that Clinton has?
	What am I missing here?
	Let's go through the map.
	You got it up?
	Yeah.
	We've got Massachusetts, Rhode Island, Connecticut, New Jersey, Delaware, D.C., Illinois, New Mexico.
	Okay, so I couldn't catch all those.
	Vermont, Rhode Island, Massachusetts, New York, New Jersey, Connecticut, Delaware.
	Does she have Maryland now?
	Maryland.
	Oh, she has Maryland?
	Maryland, D.C., and Illinois.
	Yeah, so there you go, 109.
	109?
	You got 109?
	Well, Maryland, if she has Maryland, then that would put 109.
	Yeah, New Mexico.
	I already have New Mexico.
	And he's at 154, right?
	I've got 136 on here, but again, it kind of depends on who's calling what.
	I lost my map.
	No!
	No, I lost my map!
	Let me redo this.
	There it is.
	She took the narrow lead.
	And I can just tell you my own history of doing this.
	We know where this is headed.
	Virginia there.
	Wow.
	It's still close.
	She had to work for it.
	Okay.
	New Jersey.
	Delaware.
	So she won Maryland.
	D.C. New Mexico.
	Hit me with it again.
	New Mexico.
	New York.
	Vermont.
	New York.
	Maryland.
	Rhode Island.
	New Jersey.
	Connecticut.
	Maryland.
	Delaware.
	D.C. and Illinois.
	And New Mexico.
	Has that been called?
	New Mexico is called for Clinton.
	Okay, it's not on this map, but okay.
	Fox News had it called.
	For Trump, we've got North Dakota, South Dakota, Wyoming, Kansas, Nebraska, Oklahoma, Texas, Louisiana, Mississippi, Alabama, Arkansas, Tennessee, Kentucky, West Virginia, South Carolina, and Indiana.
	Indiana.
	Okay.
	So they have her at 104.
	We have her at 109.
	I don't know why.
	I don't know what we're not adding up.
	Yeah.
	All right.
	Here, let me check something.
	It's probably the New Mexico thing.
	Fox News has her at 109.
	Someone said when Michael Moore came on, both my wife and I said, Ew.
	Crowder, update your MacBook.
	Update your MacBook.
	Oh, gosh.
	Let's see what the Young Turks are doing.
	Let's see what they're doing?
	Yeah, and let's tweet out that we're doing Young Turks.
	All right.
	So that everyone knows.
	We're going there as we speak.
	To the Young Turks.
	The Young Turks.
	Young Turks.
	All right.
	And then who do we have?
	Do we have anyone at 10?
	10.15, we go back to...
	Gavin at some point, right?
	Well, Gavin was supposed to be with Kumia.
	I'll have to track him down.
	We might not have Gavin there.
	Let's see.
	About Michael Moore.
	He looks like a lesbian, Walter White.
	So people are fans of the...
	Oh, John King is trending.
	Did he kill himself?
	Did John King kill himself?
	John King for seeing his most incredible election night.
	Incredible knowledge.
	John King just let out a huge sigh in Virginia.
	John King uses the touchscreens like watching Messi with a soccer ball.
	All right.
	So, Gerald, what's your...
	You think Trump's going to win this?
	I would be shocked if he did.
	Still?
	At this point, do you think he's winning?
	He's going to win.
	It looks...
	It honestly has a feel to look like he's got some momentum right now.
	He's up 10.5 points now in Ohio, and there's not enough counties.
	A lot of people are saying that there's not enough counties to carry the water in Michigan so that it's likely that he can still...
	It's too close to call still.
	There's not enough counties in Florida.
	There's not enough counties likely to carry the water for him?
	For Clinton in Michigan, so he can hold a lead.
	Yeah, it's possible that he's going to win Florida and Michigan.
	But again, these guys are looking at exit poll data.
	They're looking at county-by-county information that's being posted to the website.
	So that's very reliable information.
	They're very nonpartisan people that I'm getting this information from.
	So it's good, reliable stuff, but it's still too early to really know.
	But best anecdotal evidence says Florida right now solidly to Trump, even though it's incredibly close.
	Ohio not even close at all solidly to Trump.
	And then Michigan likely in Trump's favor.
	So we'll see.
	Well, let me experiment here with the electoral map, okay?
	So, let me do a different map.
	Let me do a projected map, okay?
	Right now.
	So, New Mexico, so Arizona.
	Let's give Trump Arizona.
	Nevada, let's give to Clinton.
	Stock market's down 433 in the future, as Trump leads ahead.
	So, let's give Trump Ohio.
	He's ahead North Carolina, right?
	He is at, yeah, he's ahead 50 to 47.
	He's ahead Florida.
	Yep.
	He has Iowa for sure.
	Ahead in Georgia.
	If he gets Michigan, he wins.
	So if he holds those, if he gets Michigan, he wins.
	If he doesn't get Michigan, she wins.
	So even if he gets Ohio, Iowa, let's say he gets New Hampshire, so he could also do it if he loses Michigan, but he gets New Hampshire and Virginia, he could win.
	Hmm.
	So, he needs North Carolina, he needs Florida, he needs Ohio, that's a given.
	He needs to hold all those, and then he either needs to pull out Michigan or Virginia.
	Is what it needs to do.
	So that still gives you some perspective, but it seems very possible.
	It seems very much within the realm of possibility.
	Let's see what these guys think.
	Or at the bare minimum in Michigan, we are going to have the experience that we've just endured with Virginia.
	I think they're calling Virginia right now.
	Detroit, Detroit, Detroit.
	Right.
	Okay, so let me try to think so evenly right now.
	Is that right?
	Yeah.
	Okay.
	If she has won Virginia, that is really good news, and I would flip it back to, this is not the New York Times, this is me, I would flip her back to being the favorite.
	Why would you flip Virginia?
	I haven't seen anyone having Virginia Clinton yet.
	Fox News has called it for Clinton.
	Virginia?
	Yes.
	Oh, Virginia's Clinton.
	They've called it.
	Oh, yeah, she has.
	Okay.
	Well, there we go.
	Let me add Virginia for Clinton.
	Okay.
	Okay, so that's surprising that Fox News is on top of it.
	That's shocking.
	Trump's still having a popular vote, though.
	Kind of nice.
	Montana for Trump.
	Don't count, don't presume Wisconsin.
	Well, if she loses Wisconsin, she's gone.
	Okay, but I mean, again, there's no reason why Virginia would be close and not Wisconsin.
	Montana for Trump.
	We don't have any of them for Virginia, do we?
	No.
	Montana, Trump.
	Michigan, which we know got incredibly close.
	And Ohio, these states don't have nothing to do with each other.
	Okay, New York Times does not agree with me, and Ben is making great points about Wisconsin, Michigan, etc.
	They now have Trump at 64% chance.
	The eyes say it.
	The greasy one is not so...
	So, look, one more number.
	Oh, look, the gift of Anna's back.
	Here's what I wonder, though, with the Young Turks.
	What do they do when they're alternative media?
	You know, they've been pushing Hillary and they've been pushing Bernie.
	You know what I mean?
	Yeah.
	What do they do at that point?
	I think they still claim the mantle that they've been pushing Bernie and reluctantly pushing Hillary.
	That's the kind of mantle they claim.
	The truth is their job changes a whole lot more than ours does.
	What does our job change?
	Well, we're going to make jokes about Hillary and Trump no matter what.
	And if Trump says something stupid, we'll make fun of him because it's funny.
	Like I said, I don't hate Trump.
	As a matter of fact, it's pretty good for comedy for Trump.
	As long as people can have a sense of humor about it, even people who voted Trump, as long as you can laugh.
	And the media doesn't change.
	The media corruption, the entertainment industry corruption, none of that changes.
	This is still an uphill battle, the likes of which people have never seen.
	And what this tells you is we need to shift the media issue right now.
	We need to do a complete 180 where the media has been in charge and trying to control people in how they think and how they vote.
	Well, we need to flip that.
	And that's what we're trying to do, where we can actually report on what people are doing.
	Um, hold on a second here.
	Okay, assume for a second that she holds on to Wisconsin.
	She can lose Michigan, but if she wins North Carolina...
	No, and that's not a...
	Michigan and North Carolina push.
	Then she's back to needing just New Hampshire or Nevada to win.
	Yeah.
	Okay?
	Gerald, get us a beer, please.
	Man, there's a lot of different scenarios here.
	Jared, do you want another beer?
	I would like one, thank you.
	What do you want?
	I'll take another two-hearted.
	You know what?
	I'll have an amber, Gerald.
	Please, thank you very much.
	And I'll drink it from my fine mug.
	So we're in bad, bad shape in that regard.
	As Ben's on Twitter points out, interestingly, while 538...
	So Courtney asked me to do this.
	This is for you, Courtney.
	You've got to be in with me on this.
	She told me to throw that on camera at you.
	Why?
	It's a dog toy.
	Why?
	She said throw a dog toy at Steven Crowder on camera.
	And I said, wait until later.
	Wait until we've had some beers.
	Courtney seems to think too highly of herself in regards to employment stability.
	I'm done with that.
	I've done my job.
	Uh oh, here comes Anna Kasparian, she's gonna say the F word.
	They're like the smartest fricking guys in the room, and they were smarter about this than anybody else.
	I still like him just for his frisbee haircut.
	Okay, so, look, look, guys.
	It's 50-50, man.
	It's 50-50, man.
	No, it's not 50-50.
	It's actually not 50-50, Cenk.
	There's more chance that Trump wins than 50-50.
	We are watching, we are watching.
	You can always tweet us any results that you think you have.
	You think maybe we've missed.
	I can see the map.
	I don't need them to tell me, right?
	So, it looks like she's going to win Virginia.
	That's great news.
	I mean, look, we thought she was going to lose just like half an hour ago.
	We thought she was going to lose Virginia.
	And then, good night, Irene.
	Good night, Robichaud.
	You're done, right?
	So, you're not done now.
	You're not done.
	She's back in the race.
	And Florida is not a foregone conclusion.
	And Michigan is not a foregone conclusion.
	It's anybody's race right now.
	Anybody's race.
	I love how there is a line.
	This is the difference.
	I know people who don't like it when we don't get in line for Trump and chill.
	You want to know why?
	Because this.
	Because you sound just like this.
	You sound just like this.
	If we lied to you, like, listen, we came on the show, I'm like, ah, I think he was going to win, but I think Trump could pull it out.
	And here we are, and we're just telling you, we really don't have a dog in the fight at this point.
	I prefer Trump over Hillary as far as policy.
	I don't get excited about either of them.
	But if we just came in and never criticized Trump and only criticized Hillary Clinton, we'd sound like the Young Turks.
	That's what it sounds like.
	It's anybody's race.
	Anyone can win anything at this point.
	Yeah.
	Is that a glisten on his forehead, or is that him just carrying the water?
	It's just leaking.
	It's bacon grease.
	That stands to reason.
	I don't see people getting off their couch to vote for Hillary Clinton that will get off their couch to vote against Donald Trump, but I think there are more people...
	He looks smaller than even just the last time we tuned in.
	He's like the incredible shrinking man.
	He's like Tom Hanks in Big when he's going back, turning back into a kid.
	From a suit.
	He looks smaller than before.
	He does.
	Like he's sweating, like he's cutting water weight for a wrestling meet.
	...that half the country is literally poor...
	Well, you know, he loses a lot of weight walking around, working at Home Depot the rest of the day.
	He just looks like the guy who looked there, right?
	Can you picture the tool belt?
	A little saggy on the runway.
	Him?
	Yeah.
	He just comes in.
	I'm here to fix your scaffolding.
	Oh, really?
	Plumbing aisle five.
	You want to make $30,000 a year and work for the Young Turks?
	Okay.
	You got a blazer and a t-shirt?
	Someone hashtagging that Hillary said, Detroit is reporting Hillary is barely holding a four-point lead in those counties.
	That's surprising.
	I said earlier I thought that he would do less well, surprisingly less well, in western Michigan and better in Detroit.
	I was half right.
	It's even surprising me.
	It's even surprising me.
	What do you mean, even surprising you?
	Like, people think, like, oh my gosh, what could possibly surprise you?
	Oh, that's not Jimmy Dory, right?
	That's the other one?
	That's the other one.
	I always forget his name.
	We're back to the royal bench here.
	Oh my gosh, look at Anna Kasparian.
	She looks like she just gave birth to her soul.
	Look at that face!
	Look at that face on Anna Kasparian!
	Oh my word!
	It's like she's been chasing around the princess and the frog all day long.
	She's a little exhausted.
	She looks like a little firefly.
	She does.
	Hey, Gerald, need to close the door there, Big Chief?
	Hey, here's what's so great, too, about the Mug Club, for people who don't know.
	Lotto's better.com slash Mug Club.
	Daily programming.
	Way better than Young Turks.
	Look at this.
	I can pour a full beer in here.
	A full beer.
	Look at this.
	A full beer with foam and room to spare.
	Gerald, give me a frozen beer.
	Well, Gerald's an ass.
	Gerald.
	You had one job, plus a few other jobs, but you had one main job.
	One main job.
	I shall defend myself.
	I'll let you defend yourself.
	They were in the freezer.
	That's why they froze.
	That stands to reason.
	Thank you.
	And muted.
	Oh, shoot.
	You know what we're supposed to do?
	Well, you know what?
	I don't want to bother Kamiya's show.
	His producer just seemed like it was too confusing.
	Let's just keep it in-house until we bring back Shapiro and Clayton.
	When I got this mug, here's the thing.
	It actually took, Jared knows, many, many months.
	We said it has to be two-tone.
	We went through a lot of mugs.
	We went through at least two dozen mugs.
	We said it has to be two-tone.
	It has to be able to fit more than a beer.
	So this is actually, I think it's a 15-ounce mug.
	Because when I get up in the morning, I like to grab one big cup of coffee.
	It's got to be hand-etched.
	We didn't just want to do a cheap, crappy screen print.
	We wanted to do something that you actually, you know, that is a centerpiece.
	You can put this on your table and say, hey, look at that mug.
	And then when they look at it and they try and steal it...
	You can shoot them.
	It's a beautiful mug.
	Yeah, thank you.
	I mean, it's a great mug.
	I like to drink for that mug.
	I get it.
	We understand that you like the mug.
	Mine won't stop.
	Oh my goodness.
	This is going to be a mess.
	What's funny though, CNN hasn't called it for...
	I get the sense that networks...
	I don't know if you get this.
	I get the sense that networks try and call states earlier so they can claim it.
	And that's kind of why sometimes it just...
	I think it gets all jumbled.
	Yeah.
	I think you're right.
	Alright, reading the Twitter, reading the Twitter, reading...
	What just happened?
	Jared just choked.
	Bring your...
	Jared just choked on his beer.
	Did you see this, Gerald?
	It just exploded.
	The beer exploded?
	It's all coming off the top because Gerald froze my damn beer.
	I can't keep up with this.
	No, I can't.
	This is what you get, Jared.
	I'm choking.
	This is what you get for all the mistakes and the errors.
	I can't see.
	There's poison in your beer.
	It's going to overflow.
	You better drink it.
	It choked me.
	That's what you get, my friend.
	That is what you get.
	That was surprising.
	Alright, hold on one second here.
	I'm tweeting out about the Young Turks livestream.
	I need a napkin.
	This is just unreal.
	Look, I'm sweating in here a little bit.
	You did a poll on wine versus beer versus whiskey or something like that?
	I did.
	Fantastic.
	I didn't do that.
	Well, no, I voted.
	It's on your...
	Somebody within the team did that, and I'm very happy for that.
	And I voted wine, of course.
	Of course.
	I'm going to look at Michigan.
	Michigan is Trump 50, Clinton 44.
	Ooh, with...
	Still only 22%.
	Paper towel.
	Yeah, that'd be great.
	Or maybe just a bath.
	This is a mess.
	There are paper towels downstairs there, not Gerald.
	It just keeps pouring out the top.
	So, this is a dogfight.
	I don't know.
	I still don't really know who's going to...
	I still think Trump is probably going to win this.
	But, you know, it's not a foregone conclusion for sure.
	I know.
	Someone is tweeting, Mr.
	Smiley, Jill Stein still has a chance?
	Calling what for Trump?
	Ohio?
	He takes Michigan in the presidency.
	see President Trump um Courtney did the drink poll oh Courtney did Okay, sorry, I'm just looking at Trump.
	We're trying to make heads or tails of some of these things that haven't been called in yet.
	I know it's a long night, so we appreciate it.
	By the way, also, people who join, bring up the graphic, livewithcredit.com slash mugclub, people who join CRTV, The Daily Show, we're going to give you a phone number to call into the show.
	So on The Daily Show, that's, you know, behind it.
	You still get the free show once a week, but the daily show behind the paywall, we're actually going to do callers, but only people who are members of the club because we don't want all the crazy people calling in.
	We used to do callers and Sandbag Sam got the better of us quite a few times.
	Not good.
	Jared knows this.
	Not seeing anything.
	It seems like right now we're waiting.
	We're waiting.
	We're waiting.
	What?
	What, Gerald?
	Just saying.
	Hillary or Hillary.
	Hillary.
	Courtney promoted me to officially tell you when states have gone, so I'm keeping an eye on it for you.
	There's nothing new going on right now.
	There's a bunch of speculation on the close races, but nothing's been called.
	And somebody on Twitter said that Jared needs to stop being a sissy and drink his damn beer.
	It's overflowing.
	This is just a nightmare.
	Well, I don't think that's a good reason not to drink it.
	This is a mess.
	I need a bath.
	Definitely do.
	I'm going to be a third from the day.
	For tons of reasons.
	For I voted after I voted in now.
	Well, do remember this, too.
	Do remember, I think it looks good for Trump, but do remember that Bernie stole Michigan out from Hillary.
	They're always surprised.
	It can go any way, really, up until the point when you're about 70% of the vote in.
	And even then, it can surprise you.
	It really can, yeah.
	But up until 70, it's just as much to surprise you as it is not.
	So let's just be clear on that.
	I think Florida is Trump.
	Yeah.
	How much of a percentage do we have from North Carolina?
	North Carolina, we are getting it 83% right now.
	Yeah.
	And Trump's ahead by what?
	It's 50.5 to 46.9.
	That's a good spread.
	Yeah, it's a good spread.
	Yeah, it definitely is.
	You have Montana on your map for Trump, correct?
	Yes, I do.
	Just making sure.
	You've got the updated count.
	Yeah, funny, CNN still hasn't called New Mexico.
	Nope.
	For Hillary.
	Isn't that funny?
	You've seen that, too?
	Yes.
	You figured they would for Hillary.
	You'd be like, oh, right on.
	It's fantastic.
	On top of that, they're not.
	Casey just asked me, why is Florida taking so long?
	Here's why Florida is taking so long, for people who are 2000.
	The year 2000.
	Yes.
	That's why Florida is taking so long.
	They screwed the pooch once.
	They do not want that to happen again.
	Exactly.
	Exactly.
	And they may be in a position where they're like, ah, crap.
	It looks like it's Trump we're recounting.
	I think if Hillary loses, I don't think she's going to scream rigged.
	I think she'll graciously bow out.
	Do we expect Hillary to graciously bow out?
	I don't think it'll be gracious at all.
	I don't think she does anything graciously, especially bowing.
	That's not very nice.
	I think she'll bow out.
	It's the hip hinge.
	It's a hard movement at that age, Gerald.
	I understand.
	Maybe with some support from the Secret Service guys, she can make it happen, but...
	I think she expects to win so much, she's got to just look around and go, no, no, no, this didn't really happen, right?
	This is a joke, right?
	You're punking me right now, right?
	There's somebody with a camera, and this is going to be on a funny show later.
	I think that's how she would approach losing.
	Just follow her Amazon order, because you know she's just ordering body bags by the book.
	She's pointing at people.
	She'll bow gracefully and then some really weird stuff's going to happen tomorrow.
	She's just going, hey, yeah, Podesta, yeah, I wanted to get you.
	Exactly.
	Right now at Hillary headquarters where she was planning her victory speech, it looks like the opening scene in Saving Private Ryan.
	It's just campaign signs.
	Yeah.
	All over the place.
	I like it.
	Hot sauce.
	Hot sauce.
	But none of those swing states really have been called yet.
	No.
	None of them.
	We're still waiting on them.
	Either people are just a little afraid to call them or...
	I think people are a little afraid.
	Or they really just are that close.
	And I think in some cases they really are just that close.
	They all know how much they weigh.
	And they're not going to call it until it gets to that 99% mark, I think.
	Yeah.
	I think they're not going to call it.
	I'm like Alabama.
	1%.
	I love Alabama.
	Somebody gave me some grief about making fun of Alabama when you were gone.
	Alabama's a crap hole.
	No, I love them.
	I'm just saying, you know.
	There's 3,000 people that voted and they called it.
	Okay, CNN did finally call New Mexico.
	Someone said Florida 99%, 49-48 in favor of Trump.
	And the young Turks are still talking.
	John Needek said Florida takes too long because...
	John Needek tweeted Florida takes too long because 2,000.
	Most intelligent thing I've heard.
	I don't know if he's mocking me.
	Yep.
	I don't think highly enough of myself that if someone compliments me, my first thought is always, you're crapping on me, aren't you?
	That's my first instinct.
	Let me grab a...
	Beer bottles bouncing around.
	Did you hear that?
	That is the sound of America tonight.
	This is such a mess over here.
	I bring these out.
	Sometimes I have to always explain and make sure people know they're wet wipes, not a condom.
	Nice.
	Not gays don't use condoms.
	So someone said, Hillary will not bow out gracefully.
	They'll finally let her die.
	Well played.
	That is well played.
	You know, it's not nice, but you know.
	But well played, nonetheless.
	It's not nice, but you know.
	All right, so Jamie Dupree is saying it's likely that the Republicans hold on to the Senate as well.
	There's still some races out there, but the way it looks, we still hold on to the Senate, which would be great news.
	Holding on to both houses would be, both houses of Congress would be great.
	You always say Fox News is projecting Clinton to win Virginia.
	That's Fox News.
	Yeah, we've got that.
	Yeah, we already have that.
	That's not new.
	Got that.
	Dead gummit.
	It's hard to keep track.
	You're a moron.
	Dang it.
	They're like 50-something states or something.
	You know what?
	Oh, did I ever tell you this story?
	A teacher kicked me out of class in Canada.
	Her name was Mrs.
	Lake.
	Because she said there were 52 states.
	And when I said, no, there are 50, she said, no, there's 52.
	I said, there are 50.
	She said, no, there's 52.
	And she said, uh, there are 52.
	She said, think about Alaska and Hawaii.
	And I said, uh, and Alaska and Hawaii, there's 50 states.
	And she kicked me out.
	So we prank called her 10 years later, and all we left in her voicemail was, 50 states!
	You held onto that for ten years?
	I do not underestimate my ability to hold a grudge and be petty.
	This is disconcerting for our friendship.
	Jared, how do you let things go?
	I mean, are you over the beer thing yet?
	He employs me.
	This should concern me.
	Are we good?
	Oh, man.
	So CNN has Trump with a Wisconsin lead right now.
	But I don't think there's enough of the vote.
	39% in.
	New York Times, that forecast we've been quoting, is now up to 77%.
	That Trump wins?
	That Trump wins.
	Again, that's just their forecast, right?
	So it's not a scientific thing, but that's big.
	That's really, really big.
	Well, there's only 39% of the vote in Wisconsin, and he's ahead by exactly one point, so I wouldn't...
	Well, hold on a second.
	Madison and Milwaukee, it looks like they're already in.
	Well, no, there are a few counties surrounding Madison and Milwaukee that still haven't come in.
	So Wisconsin could still go either way.
	Oh my God, though.
	Imagine all the Black Lives Matter people in Milwaukee.
	They're just crapping themselves.
	Get into CBS! Get into CBS! We burned it down!
	We don't burn it down!
	Shit!
	Shit!
	Get on a greyhound bus to Baltimore, bitches!
	We don't burn that down, too!
	We don't burn that down, too!
	Hopper's gonna lose his mind.
	Your angry black man has come full circle.
	You're doing great.
	It really is good.
	That's what I was saying.
	You know Sheriff Clark is in Milwaukee right now.
	He's going, alright, game's over, and all the Black Lives Matter are going, do what he's saying!
	Do what he's saying!
	Do what he's saying!
	Be angry!
	I can't do it.
	I think Sean King just impaled himself with a rusty hammer.
	Here's something interesting.
	What?
	The Fox News, if you go to their YouTube, they have a Donald Trump election watch party and a Hillary watch party from the same channel.
	I guess it's mostly reporting from the campaign headquarters and stuff, but it still cracks me up.
	I don't understand what just happened.
	Why two?
	Why two?
	Did you just have a stroke?
	Why would they not cover both?
	No, he had his third beard.
	Why would they not?
	No.
	My third beer is up my nose and on the monitor.
	Exactly, right?
	You've inhaled it pretty clearly.
	So can we talk about some of the people who have said...
	This is the Trump feed.
	This is the Trump feed, right?
	It's merchandising.
	That's what it is.
	Can we talk about some of the people that said they would leave?
	That they would leave the country if Trump won?
	Can we start to talk about the potential of...
	Sharpton.
	Yeah, getting rid of some people.
	Amy Schumer.
	Schumer.
	Did Sharpton say he would leave?
	Dunham.
	Yeah, a long time ago.
	Dunham, for sure.
	Yeah, I bought him a ticket.
	But if Al Sharpton leaves, does Donna Brazile just deflate into a bag of skin?
	Because he's...
	It's called promotion.
	I just feel like Al Sharpton just zips on a suit.
	And it's Donna Brazile.
	Oh my goodness.
	Okay, I'm going to tweet Amy Schumer.
	This is miserable watch.
	I can't watch this.
	Fox News, you disappoint me in your live stream.
	This is not live stream.
	This is not good.
	I will say, like I said, I'm not a huge fan of either of these people, but I am loving that I get to tweet Amy Schumer nonstop.
	That's right.
	That makes everything good.
	It is surprising how little, and maybe I'm just missing it, but there are very few live streams online right now for all this stuff, compared to the debates where every network was live streaming it.
	It's all the Democrats pulling the plug on the live streams.
	Oh gosh, we thought this was a party!
	Pull it!
	Pull it!
	Cut the feed!
	Yeah.
	Go to reruns to The Bachelor!
	I'm going to start a life.
	And Paul Joseph Watson, I'm going to start a life.
	No one gets out of the Clinton machine alive.
	Awesome.
	Well, let me just say this.
	Mr.
	Trump, please don't be so mad about our impressions of you.
	It was a joke, okay?
	All the behind-the-scenes communication.
	Please develop a thicker skin and stop sending these stupid veiled threats through your surrogates.
	It's a joke, and we're still going to do the impression, okay?
	That is the one thing that's really concerned me with the Trump presidency.
	Jared knows.
	I've talked and veiled.
	We have been told that unless we 100% endorsed Trump, we would be purged.
	We would be targeted.
	Listen.
	Oh, that sounds good.
	I'm really rich.
	I'll show you that in a second.
	That's where it comes from.
	I'm really rich.
	We're still going to do the funny impressions of Trump, and we're still going to make fun of you.
	Just please be okay with it.
	Grab him by the pussy.
	Well, he's going to be wrangling Not Gay Jared.
	I'm not sure that that's a...
	At least we'll maybe have an opportunity to find out if that hair is real or not.
	Someone said your black impression is damn good, sir.
	I told you it was.
	It is.
	I'll give you that crowder.
	Amy Schumer reminds me of Fat Bastard and Austin Powers.
	Am I the only one?
	No, the real K-Fed, you are not the only one.
	Except she's less likable.
	Gosh, that Florida just stuck at 95%.
	This is like if you've ever been to Cedar Point and you're waiting for that roller coaster to get fixed and you're just stuck up there at the top and you're like, I've been in this queue for three hours.
	Go to my screen.
	Look at Patton Oswalt.
	Look at Patton Oswalt's tweet.
	Ah!
	Ha ha ha!
	I do have to say, as much as I have so many problems with Trump, I do like watching the social justice warriors just burn out.
	Jared, Ohio's called.
	Called.
	For Trump.
	Called for Trump.
	159 Trump.
	168 Trump.
	What am I missing?
	We'll have to look through our lineup here and make sure.
	168 Trump right now.
	CNN yet?
	It's big.
	NBC News is calling it.
	At least they have a flattering picture of both of those people.
	What am I missing as far as...
	They're not calling it on Fox yet.
	It's an 11-point spread.
	It's for sure going to Trump.
	He won Ohio by 11, it looks like.
	I mean, that could tighten as it goes on, but gosh.
	That's impressive.
	Hillary Clinton saying, Nothing's tightened in my party for years!
	Though that's true.
	That sauce is not something I particularly want to ram up my hooch!
	Sorry, it gets boring between these lulls.
	It really does.
	It really does.
	I one time improperly used fast food napkins to try...
	Go ahead.
	I think we have Trump on the line.
	He's ready to accept Ohio.
	Let's make sure this is tweeted out as a screenshot.
	Mr.
	Trump, are you there?
	Okay, frankly, I knew we were going to win the Buckeye State.
	Okay, I knew that was a deadlock.
	I'm very grateful to the people of Ohio, okay?
	The polls aren't rigged.
	Okay, everyone, they say, well, the polls are rigged.
	I say, no, they're not rigged.
	They say, I think the polls are rigged everywhere.
	In Ohio?
	Okay, the good people of Ohio.
	They're the one people who don't rig polls.
	And the victory here is even more what you think of all the nasty things, okay, that their governor, that John Kasich, okay, said, low energy, low stamina, John Kasich, okay, said about me, not nice things that you would think would be nice, but truthfully, were not very nice.
	We're nice.
	And no one likes John.
	I think this is John Kasich without president.
	We're going to have to look at John Kasich.
	We're going to have to look at his tax returns and say, why are you so low energy?
	It's just what people are telling me.
	They think that he's running an underage sex trafficking ring with John Kasich.
	Okay, one time I was at a party at Trump Tower and the douchebag brought a can of Zima.
	He brought a case of Zima.
	He brought a case of Zima, John Kasich.
	He does love his Zima.
	I don't know why.
	That's an odd choice.
	I think you have to special order that now.
	That's just weird.
	Thankfully.
	Thankfully.
	Now, here's one thing when people say, were the polls rigged?
	No, the polls weren't rigged, because if you look at these, they're still within the margin of error.
	You know, if Trump were winning Michigan by 12 points, because people were saying the oversampling had like 15 oversampled Democrats, 15%.
	No, this is not indicative of a rigged poll.
	It's...
	Indicative of just a polling system that was flawed.
	I especially think that as we got toward the election time, obviously they wanted to tighten it and be as close as possible.
	No one wants egg on their face.
	But this is fun.
	This is a fun evening.
	Man, I get more positive reviews from the black thing.
	We got, uh...
	NBC is not...
	Someone says LMAO after livestream Levin rethinks about letting Lauderdale Crowder on to see our TV. That's right.
	Everybody's rethinking things right now.
	I think that's a reasonable response.
	What was that?
	We just looked at Michigan.
	Right now, Donald Trump had something like a six-point...
	Yeah, they're saying it's real tight.
	It's really tight.
	No, but a four-point lead in Michigan right now.
	Yeah.
	Now that...
	Anybody is a toss-up still.
	Yeah, but that's good.
	There's some people calling Florida again.
	Again, Jamie.
	They're calling Florida for Trump?
	No, no, no.
	This is people on the ground covering the election down there right now, saying that they're not calling it, but based on their experience and what they've done with the elections before, it looks like Trump is going to hang on and win Florida.
	Not called officially.
	I'll let you know when it happens.
	Hey, you know what?
	Courtney.
	Courtney was asking if we wanted her to come on, or if not, she should take off her contact lenses.
	Let me throw it to the fans.
	Do you want Courtney on?
	Can I vote yes?
	We've got 30,000 people, I think, that want.
	I want yes.
	They're going to say yes.
	30,000 people watching this?
	30,000 people watching this.
	She's awesome.
	And I've got to make up for the fact that I squealed on her for throwing the pet toy at you.
	You squeal every time I grab your ass in the middle of the night.
	Okay, let's go to Courtney.
	That's surprising.
	And yet not.
	Here we go.
	One more time here.
	We've got the Daily Show.
	Daily Show.
	Lauderwithbender.com slash Mug Club.
	CRTV. Joining up, Mark Levin, Michelle Malkin, Mark Stein.
	We are riding on in to media right now, and we're bringing hell with us.
	And I'm telling you, join up.
	It's less than $6 a month if you're a student.
	It's less than about $7 a month if you're not a student.
	And you get access to all those shows, and you help us to do what we're...
	We just crossed half a million subscribers tonight on YouTube and 300,000 Twitter followers.
	We are growing leaps and bounds, and oh my gosh, what we can do now that the media has been exposed, it's going to be that much more effective.
	Let me know when you have the Courtney.
	I will let you know.
	I love Courtney.
	I called her and she heard me yelling at her when I left.
	I was yelling in the bathroom about the server overload.
	So, okay, CNN has 109 Clinton and 167 Trump, whereas we have 159 Trump and 122 Clinton.
	So what have they...
	They've called...
	What have they called?
	Do you see they've called New Mexico?
	Okay, she's going to get her mic set and she'll be ready in a couple...
	Missouri for Trump.
	Oh, that doesn't surprise me.
	We knew Missouri was going to go Trump.
	Okay, hold on one second here.
	Well, let me do this again.
	You know what we want to do since there are 30 people?
	Yeah, let's do this.
	Before we bring Courtney on, we were the NeverDaily...
	Let's get the iPhone thing.
	Do you have that there?
	No, wait a second.
	Okay.
	Before we bring Courtney on, we've been saying hashtag NeverDaily for a long time.
	You know that.
	Sorry, we have to re-give this spiel for people out there.
	AR15.com has been a wonderful sponsor.
	They've put this out, preparewithcr.com.
	We are packing up tonight.
	I'm leaving the house where I started the life with my wife, moving across the country.
	Whole new studio.
	Daily program.
	A lot of things are changing.
	And do we have the video?
	We do.
	You ready for it?
	And so let me tell you what the big announcement is.
	is for those of you who missed it now since 30,000 new people are in, this is the big announcement.
	We have created a product that is the most deliberate middle finger to the media establishment ever designed.
	Ceramic, two-toned, with a charred rim and hand-etched finish, this product grants those who wield it entry into the most exclusive club in all the universe.
	Aluminium The Louder with Crowder mug club will change the way you view the world, where possibilities are now endless, where barriers are distant memory, and Hashtag Never Daily transforms into a new daily program.
	Fish and Chips, where Stephen is free to be unfiltered, uncensored, and even capable of gross abuses of the FCC guidelines and not Gay Jared's physical body on live broadcast.
	Proudly introducing the Muggle.
	I'm sorry.
	No, yeah, yeah.
	I'm narrating something fancy like...
	Yeah, I'll come back.
	I'm sorry.
	Yeah, I'm narrating.
	Proudly introducing the new daily program, the Louder with Crowder muglub aims to elevate the human experience.
	It's just our only man.
	What the f*** is it with you?
	It's f***ing distracting!
	- I'm trying to narrate a new commercial!
	So, what does that mean?
	Ladder with Crowder Daily.
	LadderwithCrowder.com slash mugclub or go to CRTV.com.
	But you don't get the mug.
	You only get the mug if you go through Ladder with Crowder.
	You get my show, Daily Show.
	It's going to be starting in January.
	You pre-order it now.
	Jared has his own weekly show, so all you people following Not Gay Jared.
	And you also get access to Levin, Stein, Malkin.
	Everything that's free is still free.
	So, I've been saying this.
	People are going, oh, are you going to...
	Nope.
	It's not going behind a paywall.
	The YouTube videos are still free.
	You'll actually have more free content.
	We have not tricked No, we haven't tricked you.
	We haven't tricked you.
	The five to ten daily articles on the site are still free.
	The Facebook content is still free.
	The once-a-week podcast is still free.
	You'll actually have more videos because we'll be growing.
	But if you want the daily show and you want to support more of that free content, more of that fighting back on the left's territory, louderwithcreditor.com slash mugclub.
	If you're a student, enter in lowercase student.
	It's $99 a year or it is...
	$69 a year if you're a student.
	So you'll sign up, you'll enter in the code student, and they'll verify afterward a valid EDU address from you.
	So listen, we just ask that you don't lie.
	If you're a 32-year-old and you kept your EDU address, we know you can do it.
	Some of you will.
	But listen, we really appreciate it.
	You guys overloaded a server earlier, and hopefully that's working now.
	There is a customer service number.
	I don't have the number in front of me.
	I'll bring it up when Courtney is here.
	Is Courtney here?
	Yep.
	Hold on a second.
	Oh.
	Hold on.
	Hold on.
	Wait for it.
	We're gonna let it play out.
	Let it play out.
	And...
	We're just gonna do it.
	We got Courtney.
	We're just gonna do it.
	Oh gosh, look how blonde she is with her hair pulling.
	She looks so airy.
	And right now all the Black Lives Matter in Milwaukee say, DO WHAT SHE SAYS! DO WHAT SHE SAYS! You guys.
	Sorry, look at Courtney.
	Now I'm trying to pull up a phone number that you're going to have me recite.
	Courtney looks saucy tonight.
	Look at her.
	Look at her.
	Gerald, do you see this?
	Gerald saw that.
	I saw that Gerald saw that.
	I am seeing this.
	Hey, how you doing?
	There's a bit of a delay.
	There's a bit of a delay.
	Well, that's what happens on the internet, love.
	Hey, do we have the server issue fixed?
	Can people join the mug club now?
	Is it working?
	No, I think so.
	I pinged someone at CRTV and said, hey, people are having problems.
	There are errors, and I didn't hear back from her.
	They knew that there was a problem.
	They were working on it.
	Well, Courtney's on, and we have 300,000 people watching now.
	No, it is still 30, but I think there has been a bump.
	Well, people can call CRTV at 800-282-CRTV, 800-282-CRTV, if they have problems.
	Thank you, Courtney, for helping so much fixing that.
	So, the decision desk...
	We don't have it This is great.
	I'm actually getting that from multiple sources right now.
	No official network's calling that, but not just the decision desk.
	There's a number of people that are calling those.
	And Trump's New York Times average percentage, 87%.
	So they're put in as a deadlock for Trump.
	No, 87 is higher than 50.
	Yes.
	So I'm not saying it's over, but it might be over.
	I think it might be over.
	I just want to see Hillary lose.
	I just...
	It's not such a Trump winning, it's about Hillary losing.
	She's wanting to be president her whole life.
	And she's going to lose.
	And she spent so much money.
	She sold her soul to the devil for this.
	And she's going to lose.
	Maybe, oh, I hope so.
	And California sold on in the West Coast states to learn.
	But think about this.
	She may have just wasted so many terrorist money.
	Somewhere right now, Clock Boy is asking his damn guitar.
	But Father, I built the Philips alarm clock bomb!
	I know!
	I know!
	And I beat the shit out of your mother!
	It's not enough!
	It's not enough!
	Maybe if I face Michael ten times!
	I don't think that will do it.
	No, we should have invested in Al-Qaeda!
	We should have invested in Al-Qaeda!
	You said Hillary!
	You said Hillary!
	We should have invested in Al-Qaeda!
	All those donations, you guys.
	All those donations to the Clinton Foundation coming from Saudi Arabia and these terrorist countries.
	And if she's not president, what are they going to do?
	They're going to want to collect.
	Yeah.
	Oh, that's a good point.
	I mean, we've got some Clinton fallout here.
	But, I mean, it's...
	Someone knows them some favors.
	Sorry, I was going to be like, hey, I tell you what, thank you very much.
	We kind of, you know, we bet on you.
	We're going to send you to Libya, and we're going to give you a phone that only works between midnight and 3 a.m.
	Good luck!
	Good luck, HRC! Good luck!
	That's what's going to happen.
	Oh man, they're going to start designing suicide vests like some of her pantsuits, like in her honor.
	I'm more so just, I wonder what's going to happen with the colleges and Black Lives Matter and what's the other thing?
	LGBTQAIP. Oh, so I've been doing polling and stuff, helping with the Twitter, and I've not been watching the liberal meltdown, but it's got to be.
	We've got Ohio officially called by CNN. We already called Ohio.
	Yep.
	These are catching up though, I mean.
	These are catching up.
	What are you saying, Gerald?
	Sorry, Courtney, we're not trying to interrupt you.
	You just know it's a cluster screw here this evening.
	I know, it's a cluster.
	I know.
	But I tell you what.
	Gerald threw the toy at you when the camera wasn't even on you either, so that was a fail.
	That's because Gerald doesn't know how to do TV. It takes years to make it up this evening.
	Plus he threw me under the bus, I know.
	Well, I tell you what, I mean, with the LGBTQAIP, the trainees just must be taking dumps everywhere right now.
	They just can't control it.
	Beautiful.
	They're just soiling themselves.
	I love this!
	We've got Clinton, Colorado.
	Did we call that yet?
	Dang it, that's what I was just saying.
	Oh, sorry.
	You took my job.
	Courtney, didn't you send him the text that I'm the guy?
	I got promoted.
	Clinton, Colorado.
	I had to do a really quick restructuring on how everything was going.
	Hold on a second.
	Don't we have one of our candidates on for Colorado?
	I think we do.
	We're going to have to connect, though.
	We have to connect.
	I don't know if you've seen this, Courtney, with the new daily budget.
	We have both...
	Both of them, I mean, they're online for us.
	Both presidents-elects.
	Have you seen this?
	Yep.
	That's a big get.
	Hold on, hold on, hold on.
	Okay, frankly, it's no secret that the polls, they're rigged in Colorado, okay?
	They're smoking so much, they don't know where they're voting.
	And they've been putting all the polls, okay?
	This is what they do, okay?
	They put all the polls next to White Castle, okay?
	They put the polls next to White Castle.
	That doesn't seem fair at all.
	That doesn't seem fair.
	That seems like a bait and vote, Courtney.
	Some days I think Courtney wakes up.
	I mean, you didn't have any choice, but I think Courtney wakes up and says, how did I end up working here?
	Oh, no, I remember.
	We're going to have to talk about that at some point.
	Well, I think what happens is we tell her, hey, Courtney, we can't help you title anything.
	We're busy.
	And then she sees this and I'm like...
	You ducked me for...
	I see what you've been doing.
	Okay, so we have...
	Hold on a second.
	I'm checking a couple of things right here, Courtney, while you're on.
	The most shocking part for me tonight is that Fox News is more on top of things than CNN and all these other polls.
	Usually, I get their updates last on my phone, last on everything.
	Yahoo, CNN, everybody on a typical day.
	But, Gerald, that's something to say.
	I'm scouring a number of sites right now, so this is why I'm ahead of you.
	And that's okay.
	Pennsylvania, a lot of you have been asking about that.
	The lead for Clinton is shrinking with 152,000, 55% reporting.
	They don't think there's enough in Philly.
	Pennsylvania.
	They think she's going to lose Pennsylvania?
	No, the lead is shrinking, so right now it's shrinking heavily.
	Have we called Georgia yet?
	Yes.
	We have not called it.
	Some people have.
	I think it's a foregone conclusion.
	Alright, I added Georgia.
	So that has Trump at 229 and Clinton at 131.
	Oh, wait, wait, wait.
	We actually got Trump in right now.
	We got him.
	On what?
	On Georgia.
	On Georgia.
	Oh, we have Trump on Georgia.
	Okay, truthfully, this was no surprise, okay?
	I grabbed him by the Georgia peach.
	Well, that just seems like...
	I hope he gets more presidential.
	I hope he gets...
	That's not...
	Yeah.
	He's running on hours.
	And I hope Courtney's parents aren't watching.
	It's down to be hours.
	Oh, it's so unprofessional.
	I love it.
	Grabbed him by the peach.
	The Georgia peach, Courtney.
	Get it right.
	That's why it's okay.
	That's why we can get...
	We can just slip it in there.
	Oh, I'm sorry.
	I'm having way too much fun with Hillary losing, you guys.
	Well, you don't even...
	And Courtney doesn't drink, so that might have to change in celebration.
	I was going to drink bleach, but it turns out I don't have to.
	Fox News is also saying they're projecting the Republicans will retain control of the House.
	Oh, okay.
	That's pretty good.
	I'm eliminating Gerald's job.
	I said that like an hour ago.
	Hold on, Gerald.
	You can't hear that Courtney is saying something.
	What, Courtney?
	I don't remember what I said.
	Now she doesn't remember what she was saying.
	I thought I was going to drink bleach, and it didn't come to that.
	Well, you know what?
	That's what the Native Americans do.
	The Native Americans, they drink the Windex and make casinos.
	I thought that's what the Greeks did.
	They sprayed it on their wounds.
	But maybe that's just the movie.
	The ancient Greeks just had sex with men.
	The modern Greeks...
	They were progressive.
	They were very forward-thinking.
	They were on the right side of history.
	Well, that was the ancient Greeks.
	The modern Greeks, namely, have sex with men.
	So not a whole lot has changed throughout, you know, ancient Greece.
	Still, there's a constant, one could say.
	Is this George Stephanopoulos Greek?
	Are you making insinuations?
	Yes, George Stephanopoulos is Greek.
	Is that a backdoor joke, you outing Stephanopoulos?
	George Stephanopoulos is Greek, or as Anderson Cooper calls him, my personal oven mitt.
	So, a lot of gay jokes tonight.
	Think about this, how many gay reporters there are.
	Anderson Cooper.
	How does he keep his skin so tight?
	Is he Botoxing?
	Spirit cooking.
	Anderson Cooper?
	Just because he's...
	We need to talk about that.
	He compensates with some other parts that are very loose.
	Well, here's the one thing that does bother me, and Courtney, it's got to bother you.
	That Trump wins, all the people who say the polls were rigged, and Hillary did the spirit cooking, and they're going to all act as though they're validated.
	And that's not true.
	This was just...
	So here's what...
	No, no, because here's what happened.
	Yep.
	And I think Hillary would have pulled this out had all of that not come out about Hillary.
	The WikiLeaks, the voter fraud.
	The last FBI.
	Comey doing his last second turnaround.
	That really kind of threw things.
	And I think that helped Trump a lot.
	Because I was saying last time I was on that I thought Trump was going to lose.
	Yeah.
	And I'm glad to be wrong if he wins.
	I will admit, like, I am so happy that I was wrong.
	Yeah.
	Because I really wanted Hillary to lose.
	This is true.
	So glorious.
	I can't contain myself.
	Well, I think you're right.
	And by the way, I'm a woman and I wanted her to lose because I'm not voting with my girl parts.
	That would be very hard to do.
	You might be able to hold a pencil.
	Especially in some of those states where you have to push the selection on the screen.
	I'm just saying.
	Technological progress actually sets a woman back.
	I don't...
	I mean, maybe you would just kind of have to...
	You would kind of have to grab it on like the alien thing on people's faces.
	An alien just...
	And grab the ballot.
	Courtney, I have to...
	Big excuse for a minute.
	So, total happenstance.
	Gerald, come into my chair and talk with Courtney.
	I'll be right back!
	Ha ha ha!
	He's probably going to call me.
	That's what happened the last time.
	I was trying to watch the segment.
	Gerald, you were way too eager.
	I am.
	You see me.
	I ran in.
	The chair slid into the TV almost.
	How's it going, Courtney?
	I'm good.
	How are you?
	I had to do it.
	My apologies.
	I'm just noticing that my shirt matches my skin complexion.
	This delay is very...
	There's a delay, you guys.
	I know you can't see it, but it's distracting.
	We can't see it.
	I'm going to fix it for you.
	I'm going to fix it for you.
	Yeah, fix it, Jared.
	Because I care.
	I'm not going to let you see yourself anymore.
	All right, so just to update a couple of people in Georgia, a couple of people have not called that yet, so we kind of think that's going to go that way, but don't worry.
	Yeah, only 49% of the vote's in, but it's...
	Yeah, it's not looking good for Hillary.
	There's only 51% of the vote in in New Hampshire.
	And so many states, well Michigan, 38%.
	Do we have like four people counting over there?
	Five, I think.
	Five.
	Apparently they're cutting the budgets of that, but that's fantastic.
	48 in Wisconsin.
	I don't know, how are so many states so far ahead?
	Same time zone.
	Yeah, I have no idea.
	It does seem like it takes forever.
	Courtney, what do you think so far?
	I mean, I couldn't hear anything that they were saying.
	Apparently, headphones are beyond the budget reaches of the former Never Daily, Ladder with Crowder.
	Isn't it a good thing that they're getting into your studio?
	I know, right?
	I might actually be able to hear people.
	This place is a nightmare.
	And now it's all soaked in beer because it's just exploded on myself.
	That is absolutely not my fault.
	Look at my eyes.
	I'm not lying.
	That is not my fault.
	Okay, so since Steven's not here right now, I know.
	Okay, so I've worked with them for over a year.
	I know what goes on over there.
	Thank you.
	I appreciate that.
	I needed that.
	Really, I did.
	You feel my pain?
	The last time it was off, I'm like, I'm watching, and then my phone is ringing.
	I'm like, oh, look, it's Steven Crowder.
	He must be calling me.
	I'm like, what's going on?
	Like, I need you to manage everything over there.
	Get everything in line.
	Like, okay, I can do that.
	Is that when I got a text message that basically said I had been given a promotion?
	So you basically just called.
	Yeah, thank you.
	But I'm in charge now.
	This is how we're doing it.
	No, it's good.
	We have some, you know, leadership now, which is fantastic.
	Oh, he's back.
	Jeez.
	Get out!
	Such a short time.
	Courtney, it was a pleasure.
	Nice meeting you, finally.
	We have Daily Wire trying to call in.
	Do you know who that is?
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	I'm going to slam dunk her.
	And what a wonderful couple they would make.
	Courtney.
	Courtney, goodbye.
	Thank you so much.
	We're ditching you for Daily Wire.
	You ditch me for Shapiro?
	I see how it goes.
	Well, he's Jewish.
	They have a lot of strings to pull.
	I'm confident some good things will come out of the Trump presidency, and, you know, obviously they'll...
	Hey there, can you hear me?
	And our whole broadcast can hear you, so just put us right through and don't talk too much unless you want to get your Donald Trump grabbed by the pussy moment.
	And everyone said they were going to fall, right?
	The economy was hit for a couple days.
	When I was walking out here, it looked like the Dow was down 700 points.
	I mean, it's not going to stay down 700 points forever.
	We have a very special crossover.
	This is where the Scooby gang meets Batman.
	Dave, we'd love for you to stick around.
	Yeah, sure.
	I know you're friends with Steve Crowder.
	Oh, again?
	I was just on with that guy.
	We're now on Crowder, and Crowder is on us?
	Is Ruben there?
	This is always how Ruben and I say hello.
	That's what we call a callback.
	I can't see you guys, but you can see me, right?
	We can see you.
	Very glad to be here.
	Oh, now I can see you guys.
	Look at that.
	Look at that whole little area and your bowls of food that no one has eaten clearly.
	I have had at least six of those Reese's.
	Hey, Ben.
	Ben can't hear you yet.
	He's putting his...
	I thought it was because he had a small heart attack.
	I'm very glad that I just missed what I just missed.
	I thought it was because Ben had a small heart attack.
	Oh, there's the mug.
	The ladder with Crowder mug.
	So, Steve Crowder, I think we should start with this.
	This is going to be the most backhanded plug that's ever happened.
	Steve Crowder, for years, has been hashtag never daily.
	He has sworn on his honor that he would never take his show daily.
	He has now demonstrated that he, in fact, has no honor.
	But he does have a daily show.
	No principles.
	Thank you.
	And it didn't matter to him at all because, of course, he has no honor.
	I have none.
	None whatsoever.
	And no shame.
	But he has a nice mug.
	So, what's in that mug, by the way?
	By the way, you get that mug if you subscribe over at CRTV right now.
	Yeah.
	Actually, we crashed the servers.
	We crashed the servers tonight.
	So, I'm sorry to everyone.
	We have to give them an actual phone number.
	Okay, why don't you give them your crappy phone number.
	Give them your crappy phone number.
	Ben Shapiro cannot ever just give a compliment.
	It has to be followed up by something incredibly insulting.
	You know me too well, sir.
	Let me see.
	The phone number we have is call 1-800-282-CR-TV. 1-800-282-CR-TV. And unfortunately it will say Levin TV because it used to be and now we're all merging.
	So it's been a cluster screw, but it's good to have this problem if so many people wanted to join.
	And I love being here with Daily Wire.
	Ben?
	It's got to be tough for you.
	Well, I mean, it is tough to watch all of the things that you once believed collapse around you.
	Like America cared about conservatism, like science and polling mattered, and Bill Mitchell didn't know what the hell he was talking about.
	Like, words meant things, and we shouldn't nominate clinical morons for the presidency of the United States.
	It turns out that Fox is giving North Carolina.
	Yeah, I know.
	So right now, basically, the whole election comes down to Michigan.
	I mean, that's the latest.
	Right now, Virginia's been called for Hillary.
	You want to see some varying forecasts.
	New York Times, which, like a day ago, had Trump at 1% to win, now has him at 91% to win.
	Yeah.
	91%, but 538, which has actually been significantly more accurate because they're not idiots like the New York Times, they have Hillary still at 52% to win because she still has to win Michigan.
	Yeah.
	Well, I will say, you know, Michigan, yeah, they have Kent County.
	I know Michigan pretty well.
	Kent County, this is what I did say about Michigan.
	I think people are going to be surprised.
	Kent County, so that's where you have the Van Andels, the DeVos, is that Dutch Reformed, sort of the Bible Belt of the Midwest.
	What, Jared?
	Trump just called for North Carolina.
	Yeah, I know, we just called it.
	What show are you watching?
	That's a good question.
	I'm sorry about that.
	We should just share a production team, because all of our producers suck.
	Well, don't drink from your mug, Ben.
	Yeah, Ben, here you go.
	Beer tastes like piss.
	I don't know why.
	Yeah, I know.
	Well, that's because it's Gentile urine.
	One thing, Kent County, I said people will be surprised how the Bible Belt Midwest won't be as strong for Trump as it would have been for like a Cruz or a Rubio, because you're talking about Dutch reform, right?
	They're not quite Mormon, but a lot of them are going to have a problem with this.
	And then I said, but I was surprised, and it does bother me.
	The thing that bothers me most about Trump is the union voters who, in the UAW, you know, it's that disingenuous sort of Sean Hannity thing, though.
	While they're living it up on Wall Street, they're shutting Detroit down.
	Like, shut them both down.
	Shut them both down.
	Don't bail out Wall Street, don't bail out Detroit.
	And Donald Trump, if you've seen his campaign stops in Michigan, has basically promised a lot of entitlements through government intervention in Michigan.
	So a lot of them are voting, but not because they're at all conservatives, because gimme, gimme.
	And Hillary Clinton just doesn't connect with the working middle class voter.
	We were talking about unions that are overwhelmingly white, uneducated, and Donald Trump basically said he's going to put a 35% tariff on Ford if they put a plant in Mexico, which ironically enough would bring 8,500 jobs to Michigan.
	So I think people don't understand that.
	But what I saw coming out of Wayne County, which is Detroit, that Clinton's only up by four.
	And she would need a lot more than that to win.
	No, it's a disaster area for her.
	Pennsylvania, by the way, is also starting to look much more competitive.
	She had like 131,000-vote lead.
	That is narrowing dramatically.
	By the way, the exit polls obviously were wrong on everything.
	So, again, I'll credit to all.
	Never believe the exit polls.
	Ron Johnson is now up eight points on Russ Feingold in the Wisconsin Senate race, which means that he's significantly overperforming in Wisconsin as well.
	Again, if he wins either Wisconsin or Michigan, he's president of the United States.
	Unbelievable.
	I mean, it's an amazing, amazing thing.
	Steve, you bring up this promises to bail out Rust Belt institutions, the auto industry, Detroit, etc.
	This is something that we haven't really talked about much.
	In our little huddle here at The Daily Wire, I worry that one of the negative consequences of a Trump administration is that it will exacerbate race relations.
	Obviously, President Obama has single-handedly set the clock back 40 years in this country vis-a-vis race relations.
	We hope that as we move past leftist ascendancy, maybe there will be some healing there.
	But interestingly, because Trump speaks the language of the left but to a different segment of the population, he's actually exacerbating race issues.
	Basically, the left says, hey, black people, we're going to give you free stuff and take it away from white people.
	Trump's argument seems to be to say, hey, white people, you want some of that same stuff that black people have been getting all this time?
	I want to know why you're laughing at it.
	Did he fly down?
	No, because you missed earlier, Russ, and if he wins Wisconsin.
	Right now, Black Lives Matter in Milwaukee, they're thinking about Sheriff Clark and just yelling, Do what he's saying!
	Do what he's saying!
	Get in the CBS!
	We burn it down!
	Get your ass a crayon in Baltimore!
	We burn that down, too!
	So I think I destroyed race relations for our entire channel.
	Do we have to point out at some point the fact that Hillary Clinton may still win the popular vote and lose the Electoral College?
	I mean, I wasn't here so I didn't hear it obviously, but the fact is that If you were going to write a recipe for the country tearing itself apart, could this election have done any better?
	Well, I don't want to...
	There are no good...
	I know, I'm a real upper, you know?
	But, like, the only two election outcomes that are now plausible are that Trump loses by such a narrow margin that the Republican Party tears itself apart in recriminations, or Trump wins, and Hillary wins the popular vote, or is really close to the popular vote, and then she claims it's rigged because Well, hey, Ben, I want to say something real quick.
	I don't know if you've heard this.
	This is completely, I mean, I can't substantiate it officially at all, but I have quite a few people who are saying that actually they're already looking into a recount in Florida.
	Wow.
	Wow.
	So I guess nobody's going to concede anything and we'll get to do this whole routine again.
	This will never end!
	What the hell is going on?
	What do people do?
	Guys, guys, not to add to the chaos here, but I just got a text from a pretty reputable guy who said we should all sell all our Bitcoin tonight.
	He said it between bong hits.
	I'm not kidding!
	Oh, God.
	By the way, if you want to buy gold, Birch Gold's the place to do it.
	Hey, can we talk about the real issue here?
	Jill Stein got 10,000 votes in Michigan.
	She got 50,000 in Florida.
	What the heck?
	In Florida?
	How do you get that many old people to vote Jill Stein?
	Just think, apparently they used the same butterfly ballot that they had with Patrick Cannon and Al Gore back in 2000.
	They just changed the names on it.
	They're saying, Harry Enten over at 538 right now, he's saying, there's a lot of talk about Clinton trailing in Michigan and Wisconsin.
	Pennsylvania may be even a bigger problem.
	Clinton is up by just four percentage points.
	That lead is slipping as more of the vote comes in from outside the Philadelphia media market.
	Clinton cannot lose Pennsylvania and win the election.
	The estimate right now is down to 50% for Clinton, 48% for Trump.
	Trump, he's not gracious in winning.
	Well, the only good news for me is that I've had this running segment, Good Trump, Bad Trump.
	It's become one of those popular segments on the podcast.
	I guess I'm going to get to do that for four more years.
	They're going to let you do that from prison?
	Yeah, exactly.
	My only hope here, Ben, is that people don't all of a sudden get mad that, you know, we do the Trump impression.
	Like, why aren't you supporting this guy?
	As long as people have a sense of humor about it.
	Like I said, I don't care what happens in this election.
	I'm...
	Yeah, sorry, Crowder.
	Steven, given how this year has gone, I can certainly see that everyone's going to have a sense of humor and be in good spirits throughout this election cycle.
	Crowder, I have no doubt that suddenly all of the Trump people, you know, they're all about free speech.
	So, you know, when you start making fun of Trump, I'm sure they're going to just love it.
	That First Amendment, it's giving too much freedom to that prick over there in Michigan with his studio and the curtains.
	What's he broadcasting from?
	A porta potty?
	Guys, I gotta say, I turn, on January 15th, I turn 33, and I have a bad feeling as a Jew turning 33, I may end up on a cross.
	That is usually when we get rid of them.
	It would be a bad year.
	Oh, gosh.
	Well, listen, I actually think, I mean, like I said, I don't have a dog in this.
	I do love that there are going to be a bunch of celebrities moving to Canada.
	And I do love that.
	Here's one thing that is a silver lining with what you do, obviously, at DailyWire.com and, you know, with now the Mug Club and CRTV. It doesn't matter who wins at this point.
	I think there really has been a spotlight on the fact that the media is an arm of the DNC. And if people can finally just heal this and go, okay, we get it.
	We're conservatives, Republicans, whether you're Trump or whether you're not really a big Trump fan.
	Culturally, I hope people come together and it's time to bring hell to the media and the entertainment industry.
	I think the soil is really fertile for that right now.
	People get it, even people who are left.
	I mean, look, you got Dave Rubin there.
	Four years ago, this wouldn't have happened.
	Where?
	You know, I think that's absolutely right.
	And I think the thing is that people now know, no matter what happens, that we are in a war with these people.
	And you can take either side in that war.
	But before, it was like a shadow war.
	It was like a Cold War.
	You know, they were doing this stuff to us, but nobody would admit it was there.
	And now you just can't deny it anymore.
	You could just look at whatever traction you're getting and views that are happening right here and on your show and look at Ben's tweets and my tweets and your tweets and then compare that to everything in mainstream tonight and know the amount of money they have behind them versus what we have behind us.
	Well, I do think there's an important delineation.
	It's reality.
	Is Ruben...
	I do think there's an important delineation because Ruben and Shapiro...
	Listen, as much as I despise you, I think you are truthful.
	And it is really easy to say, well, look, compared to mainstream media, a lot of the Trump people have just lied.
	You know, Hillary Clinton has Parkinson's and is cooking with chicken penises.
	You know, that kind of stuff.
	So Ruben and Ben, you have high engagements.
	You have a lot of people watching just by actually reporting the truth.
	So it is important because Kim Kardashian's ass is going to get more retweets and more interactions than anything.
	So as long as we maintain that integrity...
	It's fine to be snippy.
	It's fine to not even necessarily be super civil if you're doing comedy.
	But I do think that everyone there at that table, I can honestly say, I don't know how all of you voted, but I do have a lot of respect for the honesty here at this roundtable.
	Well, I appreciate that with you also, Stephen.
	And I think that's the part that's disturbing to me is that there's been so much dishonesty in this election cycle, as you mentioned.
	I mean, everything from small lies to big lies, lies about policy, lies about things that happen, slander of people that clearly has happened from the Trump campaign and from Trump's allies.
	We're going to get four years of that.
	I mean, there is a real downside to this election.
	I mean, obviously, it's fun to celebrate the upside of Hillary Clinton just sitting there and actually having a – this is the closest we will ever see to having a physical bucket of water thrown in the bucket system.
	Hillary apparently at the headquarters has actually turned off the network TV. Yeah, they've turned off the network TV at the headquarters because the news is so bad.
	That's because they killed the cameraman.
	I heard you, Crowder.
	That was good.
	Yeah, but to be fair, some of the worst people on Earth are actually going to be...
	This is going to be true either way, but some of the worst people on Earth of our party are actually going to be empowered by this.
	I mean, there is that group of people who have really...
	The alt-right, which has been the bane of my existence for the last year and a half, that's going to be all of our lives for a while because the fact is they're going to feel emboldened and empowered.
	And what they believe is not even anything, not only not close to conservatism, not anything close to decency.
	It's not close to decency.
	And I don't think Trump's going to, I mean, I think it's an optimistic, ridiculous vision that Trump is going to cut those people out of the loop after he thinks they were his most beloved contingent pushing him to victory.
	Let me just take for a moment.
	I don't want to hurt, you know, give you a heart attack or anything.
	Let me just take a positive approach to this for just a minute.
	The one thing we've seen with Trump is that he has learned.
	He has changed.
	He's actually kind of calmed down a little bit.
	Now, wait, I'm not saying he's changed inside.
	I'm just saying that he has learned how to do this.
	He has vacillated.
	I don't think it's fair to say he's changed permanently.
	He moved back and forth over the course of the election.
	But the more popular he is, the less the alt-right does for him.
	We agree.
	Yeah, and they kind of are going to, people are going to say to him, hey, you know, you can have us, you can, wait, you can have us, you can have this majority, but you can't have us and them.
	Nobody likes us.
	They've officially called Florida for Donald Trump.
	This is bananas.
	This is actually, we need a word.
	Was that a Harambe joke, you insensitive prick?
	Yeah.
	Well, I do not think, I disagree with you because I think that if Donald Trump has proved one thing, it's that Donald Trump unleashed is worse than Donald Trump on a leash.
	And I really, and I don't think, and I think Donald Trump with the power of the most powerful nation in the history of humanity behind him The power of the most powerful office in the history of humanity that Obama just turned into a quasi-dictatorial branch.
	With that behind him, the idea that he is going to suddenly moderate and be disciplined, wonderful Trump that everybody wants him to be, Like, based on what evidence, other than just wild hope, is that going to happen?
	He really likes to be liked and wants to win.
	And I don't think, you know, this is a guy, for all the faults, endless list of faults that this guy has, that he likes to win.
	And winning over the next four years would not be going all in with the alt-right and the neo-Nazis.
	That's not winning.
	So I think maybe...
	Unless he becomes unpopular, right?
	Yeah, maybe.
	So there's some route that then he does.
	Well, hold on one second.
	Let me say one thing.
	Idaho got called for Trump, and just, you know, like even now on Twitter, someone just has, you know, we're talking about this crossing streams, and I would think that this is something all conservatives would enjoy, this kind of a panel, and even, you know, people like Dave Rubin, moderates, and someone has, you know, draws a little thing over Ben's head and says, Jew confirmed, and has a draw, you know, over his yarmulke.
	Like, this kind of stuff.
	This is the kind of stuff that I really hope goes away, and I agree.
	Listen.
	I understand that Ben has more of a dog in that fight because of the personal attacks, the stuff that's happened.
	It really is just honestly the point of being completely unacceptable.
	Hey, Clavin, you missed that one because you converted, and I'm sure they're still pissed about living in another team.
	I got a little of it.
	I kept referring him to Ben.
	Yeah, exactly.
	I think you believe this man.
	You can't reach him today because it's Saturday.
	Hold on.
	California and Hawaii for Clinton.
	Big shocker.
	California.
	Twist of the night.
	Plot twist.
	538 now has a dead even 49% chance for each.
	This is 0% in.
	0% in.
	My map doesn't have Hawaii.
	Where do I find...
	Oh, there we go.
	Well, so anyway, sorry, Ben, I understand where you're coming from.
	So I do hope that goes away, and I do think it's important to note this.
	I was talking about this earlier.
	Even if someone went, they're not winning 50% of the vote, right?
	Whoever wins is not even getting 50% of the vote.
	And less than 50% of the people who vote for that candidate like that person.
	So the worst thing they could do is go out and bolden and think they represent a majority of the country.
	And hopefully they don't.
	And hopefully, like you said, Ben, hopefully these wounds heal and people realize that, you know, even though Ben was not a big fan of Trump, Ben's not their enemy.
	And hopefully Ben can make friends with people who...
	Have swastikas in there.
	Well, there are certain people, again, I think that there are certain people that are not looking to make friends.
	And so we'll find out.
	We'll find out.
	You know, my principles on this have not changed one iota, which means that Donald Trump, apparently when he's president, right, New York Times now has him up to a greater than 95% chance of being president of the United States.
	When Donald Trump is president of the United States, I plan on calling him wrong when he's wrong.
	They've almost moved the New York Times 100%.
	That's exactly right.
	98% against six hours ago.
	Right, exactly.
	But if you think that the Republicans are going to hold Donald Trump's feet to the fire, I would just ask, again, based on what evidence is.
	That is not what I said at all.
	All I said was really what Dave said, is that Donald Trump is a guy who likes to be liked, he likes to be popular, he likes to win.
	I hope you're right.
	I think you're wrong.
	I hope you're right.
	I think you're wrong.
	And the reason I say that is because I do not think...
	I'm not even predicting that.
	I'm just saying it's as likely as what you're saying.
	Washington just went clean.
	Just so you know, Washington just got called.
	And my theory is that power has never made a bad man better.
	Well, that's certainly true.
	Stephen Krueger.
	Yes.
	Who has racists with a...
	Oh, I was going to say, if you guys want to have a good time, we can bring up the Young Turks livestream and do a stream within a stream.
	You should see Cenk's forehead right now.
	It's like someone is just going, let me put powder on it in the back room.
	It's like a scene in an airplane.
	All in all, it's been a good year for me.
	Ruben's going to saunter on home.
	It was a very good year.
	Alright, listen.
	Thank you very much.
	Yes.
	To louderwithpowder.com, to the new venture over at CRTV, and to the future of America.
	Absolutely.
	Just don't put crappy Irish whiskey in my mug, Jeremy, you horrible cretins.
	This is good Irish whiskey.
	That's an oxymoron.
	I love you.
	I must go, Jared.
	End the stream.
	I'm going to end with that parting shot.
	Yep.
	All right.
	So we have...
	And Wyoming.
	For Trump?
	For Trump.
	Well, we already called Wyoming for Trump.
	That's not new.
	It's new for Fox, I think.
	So, alright, here, so we are coming on down.
	I'm trying to get to...
	Gerald, can you give me a report on Pennsylvania, what that is right now?
	Washington for Clinton, that's what you were going to say.
	Yeah, I know.
	But Gerald, can you give me Pennsylvania, what that is?
	Hold, please.
	Hold, please!
	That's right!
	Hold my calls!
	I'm seeing only 69% of the total in for Pennsylvania.
	Is she leading or is it...?
	It's narrowing.
	The lead right now is narrowing in Pennsylvania.
	What's your lead?
	I have to look again and see.
	But last time I checked it was 55.
	Okay.
	So not percent thousand.
	Okay.
	We're getting there.
	And Washington, Clinton called Fox, California, Hawaii, Clinton.
	So 202 to 233, Clinton, Trump.
	So did they call Iowa yet or no?
	Pennsylvania is 49 to 47 percent.
	Percent, yeah, that's what I'm saying.
	So that's closer than people thought.
	I think a big part of this is that the black vote did not come out for Clinton in the same way they did for Barack Obama.
	I think you're probably right about that.
	Especially if you look at Philadelphia, you look at Detroit.
	And the millennial vote, I think a lot of them are still a little bit pissed about Bernie.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, I don't think they're voting for Trump.
	They're not voting for Hillary.
	They're not showing up to the polls.
	They've had all the campaigns.
	Robert Downey Jr.
	came out and said to go.
	Yeah, I know.
	That really ticked me off with Robert Downey Jr., because he was actually always right-leaning.
	He was.
	Robert Downey Jr.
	Probably is.
	I think in any other election, he probably would have stayed silent.
	Has North Carolina officially been called Trump?
	I know we have it on the map, but has it officially been called?
	Not by CNN, and not by Fox, I don't think.
	No, it has by Fox.
	Yeah, it has by Fox.
	Not by CNN. Fox just wants to be first.
	They don't care if they're wrong.
	It's just...
	First, whether we're wrong or white.
	Oh, hey, by the way, do we have any word from Hillary in Florida?
	Do we have her?
	No, no worries.
	She's been quiet about it.
	Okay.
	Been quiet.
	All right, hold on.
	Let me check at AR15.com and see what the chatter is there.
	It's Ova in Florida.
	Funny enough, they haven't called Georgia yet for Fox.
	Yeah.
	Which is kind of weird.
	So I think when Trump won Florida, the stream went down for just a second.
	I think Facebook crashed it and it came back up.
	So some of the people...
	Jared, did you record?
	Yep, it's all recorded.
	Maybe we can play it a little bit later.
	Record the what?
	Just see Trump's call-in when he won Florida.
	So I think a couple of people may have missed it when the stream went down.
	They'll get it.
	They'll get it online.
	It didn't go down on YouTube, did it?
	Just Facebook?
	It went down on YouTube for a second and came back.
	Came right back.
	Yeah, because Facebook was a douche.
	That happens.
	Facebook.
	Come on.
	We're right backed up.
	We're right backed up and healthy.
	All right.
	Hold on a second.
	Oh, Sally Cohn.
	Look at my timeline right here.
	Sally Cohn.
	Yeah, reconnect it.
	Hold on one second.
	Damn it, Jared.
	This is all going to be way better when we go daily.
	Oh, it's much better.
	We're going to have several new hires.
	It won't all be a nutless monkey with a TriCaster.
	This is true.
	Alright, hold on one second here.
	I'm bringing this up.
	Do you have it?
	Yep.
	Look at Sally Cone.
	My head hurts!
	Yeah.
	Yeah, I bet it does.
	It's a head or heart.
	My heart hurts.
	Heart.
	Yeah.
	Well.
	Where's that?
	Alright, let me get this.
	Let me get this stream back up.
	Let me get this stream back up.
	Stream back up.
	ladderwithcrader.com slash mugclub for people watching to watch the daily program.
	Daily program, ladderwithcrader.com slash mugclub.
	The show is going daily.
	All the free stuff is still free, but if you want the daily show, you want Jared's show, you want Mark Stein, you want Mark Levin, Michelle Malkin, you want the app to watch it wherever you go, and you want to actually put your money where your mouth is and support alternative media, this is it.
	Do you know he's not going to have a show?
	This biracial turtle right here.
	...the beneficiary of a president who wants to renegotiate...
	Xerxes gained weight?
	Alleyvel, hang around.
	I'm sure this is a storyline we will be keeping our eye on.
	Lester?
	We've got some movement now as we continue to watch the battle of the U.S. Senate.
	There was a very close race in Wisconsin.
	It was a rematch.
	Russ Feingold, the Democrat, against Ron Johnson, the incumbent Republican.
	And we're reporting, Chuck, that the Republican, Ron Johnson, has held on.
	This is obviously important in terms of whether or not the Democrats are going to get control of the Senate, but also what it might, again, portend about...
	So we get Oregon for Clinton.
	A state that is in the must-win column now for Hillary Clinton.
	I'm trying to do my math on the Senate here.
	With what's left, you've got New Hampshire.
	So we're sitting here.
	Republicans at 48.
	If they hold Blunt, and if they hold Toomey and Ayotte here, I think they get there.
	Oh, see?
	See, I see what you did there.
	Right now, though, they're losing in Pennsylvania.
	I think New Hampshire's a total coin flip, and Blunt continues to be a coin flip.
	But this is basically an upset.
	I've seen a lot of chatter right now from a lot of these reporters saying that the Democrats did a poor job in some of their Senate recruiting.
	They got a bunch of retreads, and I never understood the decision to do this, but right now, all three retreads have lost.
	And now they're looking at it going, Hillary has to do X, Y, Z. Someone said Cenk literally has tears in his eyes right now.
	Let's go.
	He should.
	Switch it over.
	He said they're calling for a war on Republicans, too.
	Who Cenk is?
	We're going to Young Turks.
	We're going to Young Turks, people.
	Defcon 5.
	It's NBC. We're switching.
	Bring it.
	Bring the war.
	Well, MSNBC, Young Turks, what's the difference?
	Semantics, right?
	One's going to Young Turks.
	We've got to get the Young Turks stream.
	We've got to get it going.
	Oregon Clinton putting up Oregon Clinton.
	So there we go.
	Oregon, Clinton.
	Instantly, yeah.
	Oh, he does have tears in his eyes.
	They go down to this planet and they fire the phasers, but the monster feeds off of the energy of the phasers.
	So every time they fire at it, it gets bigger and stronger.
	See, unlike the Democrats, they figured out, stop firing the phasers.
	And so in this case, the phasers are...
	How about you stop eating the phasers?
	Oh, he's a bigot.
	Oh, he's racist.
	Oh, he's sexist.
	You know what the American people heard?
	They heard he's not a politician.
	Yep.
	So...
	It's not them, Cenk.
	That's you!
	The only thing you do is call people racist and sexist and homophobic.
	Am I hearing this right?
	He's trying to act like...
	Lester Holt calls people racist.
	That's all you do.
	You are the poster boy.
	You're the fat, three-dimensional poster boy for calling people racist, sexist, and homophobic, and you are the reason for Donald Trump.
	Chank.
	Utah.
	Utah for Trump.
	Utah for Trump.
	Evan, didn't pull it out.
	This buds for you, Utah.
	Wait.
	Sorry about that.
	That's my bad.
	This O'Doul's non-alcoholic beer is for you.
	I think O'Doul's is non-alcoholic.
	That'll work.
	Utah for Trump.
	That's official.
	Official.
	It's official.
	Do we have anyone connecting?
	I think we've got Trump on the line.
	We've got Trump on the line for Utah.
	Okay, truthfully, the most beautiful state, when people ask me, they say, what's the most beautiful?
	Utah.
	Okay, tell them Utah.
	When I was there last month for the first time, I saw it.
	I said, I can't believe I tell everybody since that Utah is just, you got the mountains.
	And the people there, they're so good looking.
	I think it's because the Mormons, they don't drink.
	Okay, they live very healthy lives.
	They got the underwear.
	They make their own underwear.
	They do make their own underwear.
	Do we have Hillary Clinton on Utah?
	We must have Hillary Clinton on Utah.
	I've got to imagine that she has something to say.
	She did.
	She has something to say.
	We have Hillary Clinton calling in right now on Utah.
	Hillary Clinton, you lost Utah.
	Can you hear us?
	Are you aware of this?
	Oh no!
	Utah!
	Whatever will I do with myself?
	Oh no!
	Your film festival sucks!
	That's not nice.
	That's not nice.
	That's rude.
	She was very rude.
	She's better than that.
	Well, no, she's not.
	She's not better than that.
	I picture being a little more graceful, though, in losing Utah.
	I picture being a little more greasy.
	Hey, do you ever think that Hillary Clinton, like, she didn't get fat by accident like this?
	Like, I picture, like, foie gras, where they've, like, hooked her to a hose and just...
	I think she eats the souls of all the men she's killed.
	That puts a lot of weight on you.
	It's all calories right there.
	Certainly not the men she slept with.
	Ouch.
	Well, I'm just saying she's an insatiable lesbian.
	She'd be very thin in that regard.
	We've got to start rolling these two because we spend time on this.
	Yep.
	Yep.
	And that happened.
	And that happened.
	Real quick, so Trump is on the verge of going ahead in Iowa, which, just to give you kind of a strategy lesson here, forces Clinton to win Pennsylvania, Wisconsin, and Michigan.
	Right now, Michigan, he's holding his lead.
	Wisconsin, he's holding his lead.
	He won Kenosha County, which is pretty impossible.
	He won by like a thousand votes, so pretty close.
	PA, he's still holding on.
	I don't think Kenosha County is super left.
	I don't know, but they said it was pretty cool that he won.
	Okay.
	Yeah.
	So maybe they were just thinking it would go the other way.
	Maybe not by a lot.
	Does he have a lead in Wisconsin or Michigan?
	I think right now he's got a lead in both Wisconsin and Michigan.
	He's closing the gap in Pennsylvania.
	Clinton's trying to hold on.
	But he does have a lead in Wisconsin.
	In Wisconsin?
	He has like a 2% lead in basically all these states.
	Right.
	Okay, in all these states.
	Except for Pennsylvania.
	Pennsylvania's down 2%.
	Right, 2%.
	So he's making up some ground.
	And Kawhi and New Hampshire up there is still kind of a tight race, too.
	Only 61% of the end, but 46-48, Trump.
	So, Obama, just to give you some Kenosha County news right here from Adam Wollner, he won there by 12 four years ago.
	So, for Trump to win, that's big.
	That is big.
	Yeah.
	Very big news.
	Okay.
	Good job, Kenosha.
	Thanks, guys.
	Kenosha Kickers.
	Milwaukee's best.
	Kenosha Kickers.
	Yamaguchi polka.
	Polka.
	Polka.
	Very big in Chibokin.
	I love it.
	This is a theme for quotes tonight.
	You know, I've been still saying, even up to today, I still was thinking it could be Hillary, and if not graciously, maybe even a landslide.
	And I'm happy I was probably wrong.
	Yeah, you were wrong.
	You were saying that today.
	I was saying that today.
	Gerald was like, you told me I had a fickle internal poll.
	I said, I got a feeling with Trump.
	You know, I've always kept it at about a 60-40 number.
	I've always said it's far more likely than the media thinks and far less likely than his supporters think.
	Yes.
	Because, you know, here's the thing.
	If you look at these leads, they aren't landslide leads in these states.
	No, these are a couple points.
	These are very, very close.
	So, you know, especially as you look at the polls at Titan, that is within the margin of error for polls.
	So it certainly is not an indictment on everything really being rigged.
	No.
	Though if it went the other direction, people would say it was rigged if it was that close.
	I just think they were wrong.
	They underestimated.
	You know, it's a change election.
	But these aren't huge landslide leads in these places.
	And, you know, if Donald Trump doesn't tread very carefully, he could just as easily lose them as quickly as he got them.
	So hopefully people understand that.
	And, you know, listen, don't just when you win tonight, celebrate it, but work to preserve it.
	You know, hopefully keep these people accountable.
	Either one of the people that win tonight will have a lot of work to do to bring the country back together because the country is just disgusted in most cases with both people.
	Even if you're voting for Trump or voting for Hillary, you're probably having to in some ways hold your nose.
	Because you may love that Trump is great on certain issues that you like, but on other issues, you're kind of looking over those.
	Look hard at those things because this person is going to have to run the entire country.
	Neither one of these people is going to have a mandate going in.
	If Trump wins, it's going to be kind of a surprise to a lot of people.
	Like you said, his supporters will be like, yeah, we told you this from the beginning.
	Well, fine.
	It's mostly a miracle from other people's perspective.
	Maybe not quite a miracle, but a very shocking result to a lot of people.
	He's not going to walk in and say, hey, I'm here to rule and everybody's going to say, yeah, absolutely.
	He's got to deal with Republicans who feel like they have been betrayed by him.
	They feel like he almost cost them everything.
	And the problem is Trump might just go in and just try and, you know, scorched earth, kick them all out, and that's not going to help.
	No.
	So he needs to go in and make nice with Paul Ryan and make nice with...
	He does.
	He needs to do that.
	And his supporters need to do that, too, because these people are not your enemy, Trump.
	They need to understand that.
	Hopefully they get that.
	Yeah, we're all Americans.
	We all see the same issues and the same problems.
	We want to solve them.
	Except for Hillary.
	Well, she's a demon.
	She's the devil.
	She's a demon with a green card.
	I'm trying to say a point here!
	We want to solve the same problems, pretty much kicking both of yous out of the country.
	Yeah, well, that's true.
	That's job number one.
	I'm for that now.
	You want to solve the problem of getting a date with Courtney.
	You sold me.
	You sold me.
	She's quite fetching, Miss Courtney.
	I know.
	I know.
	She's quite fetching.
	You know, she's all the way out and wherever, and I'm all the way out.
	She finds the fart jokes really funny, though.
	If ever we write a fart joke in an article...
	She has a bizarre...
	How does she feel about the actual act?
	No?
	Not so much?
	But you both hail from tax-free states, so there's some common ground to be found.
	It's not tax-free states.
	We just don't have an income tax in the state.
	We have a property tax that makes up for it.
	What's that mean?
	Don't get me wrong.
	What do you rent?
	What?
	Well, I've got to put my business out there like that.
	You know what this is to me?
	Tweet me at S-Credit what you guys think and tweet at NotKJarrett or at GMorganJr.
	What it is for me is I was way more nervous into it.
	It's kind of like a stand-up show where I've always...
	Gerald's been with me before.
	You've both been with me before stand-up shows, right?
	I'm just nervous.
	I'm always reciting, going through.
	I'm amped up.
	And then once I'm in it, I go into autopilot.
	At this point, you know, I think Trump's going to win and that's great.
	And if Hillary wins, I'm okay too.
	I'm not nearly as nervous at this point as I was before.
	Does anyone else feel that way?
	Once you're in it, you're kind of like, alright, it's out of our hands at this point, and it's going to happen, so let's just let it happen and recalibrate tomorrow.
	I think it's like a sports analogy.
	You've got to get hit first, and then you get comfortable with it.
	You have to just understand what you're dealing with.
	And I think the big angst by everybody, including the market, the market was very much down when Trump, because nobody knows exactly what he's going to do.
	They did that with Brexit.
	Because I don't think he knows exactly what he's going to do yet.
	He's like...
	Son of a gun, I actually won?
	Whoa!
	Okay, let's go.
	So I think you've just got to get a little bit comfortable with what things are going to be like, and we won't really know until he starts talking, which usually is his downfall, post-election.
	And it's not over yet, obviously, right?
	There's still a way for Hillary to...
	Is Trump TV illegal if he's president?
	No, I think as president, I believe you have to put everything into a blind trust, or maybe you don't have to, but that is a common practice.
	But I mean, a violation of the free, I guess an NPR is basically publicly funded, but I'm saying an actual elected official to have a television network, that does seem a little Orwellian.
	A little bit.
	Like if President Obama had Obama TV, I'd be scared.
	Well, he did.
	He had CNN and he had NBC and MSBC. Wait, he didn't own that?
	Wait, I think it's time for you to dub this right here.
	Dub it.
	What's happening?
	She's not cussing?
	Yeah.
	I think really I think I just I want to say sorry let me just I just I say fuck it means real talk look at my I don't have lips so I paint them on and I have a my my bun makes me four inches taller I don't know what this I don't know what's happening and my neck looks like one of those African ladies who puts rings on it because it's so long because I'm so gaunt I've been so stressed
	Also, I'm sitting next to this guy who really, really just slaughtered my people, but I'm okay with it because he keeps me employed, because I'm fucking real talk, guys.
	Also, my eyebrows always look fucking surprised!
	So much!
	My red dress was dirty.
	No, let's hear what she's saying.
	Do you think it's going to be used equally or allocated equally across all religions?
	Of course not.
	Of course not!
	You know, any ounce of normal leadership when you execute a guy and it takes 45 minutes for him to die and they don't know how to end the suffering is indisputable.
	That sounds like this broadcast.
	I'm making him a monster.
	They get out.
	All you say is, until we solve this, we're not going to have the death penalty.
	That's what any sane country would do.
	Big news.
	This just in.
	California voters passed a ballot measure to legalize the recreational use of marijuana.
	No longer just medicinal.
	They don't have to make up anxiety anymore as a reason to cook it.
	Tell Ruben to get on that now.
	Yeah, tell Ruben to get on that.
	Come on, Ruben.
	Hold on, hold on.
	I want to hear what Anna has to say.
	She's unbelievably interesting.
	We're going to need it.
	Yeah, exactly.
	That's what I'm going to do as soon as I get home tonight.
	North Dakota with 71.5% of the vote in...
	Of course, that's not all of it, but...
	Politico is reporting that North Dakota has voted yes on medicinal marijuana, 64.1%.
	Okay, so Politico again is calling it.
	And then Massachusetts is still looking good for recreational marijuana.
	It's still a tight lead.
	Is this me or are they remarkably boring?
	These are the real issues, Stephen.
	These are the real issues.
	Did you just say California is a movement?
	No, no, I'm talking about Massachusetts.
	59.9% reporting, and the yes vote is leading 53 to 46.
	Okay, California has approved Prop 64.
	Marijuana is now legal in California.
	Marijuana is now legal.
	Of course!
	It looks like they legalized cocaine, looking by your eyes there.
	Can I add just one, because as we're going over those numbers...
	Can I add?
	No, you never add.
	...that take Clinton to, like, 277.
	But there's a great scenario here where she actually comes back, wins New Hampshire, but maybe doesn't win Nevada, right?
	And then there's a number here where this night gets better and she hits 270.
	He sounds like he doesn't believe that.
	Oh, God.
	There's a possibility.
	No.
	What the paper says?
	Oh, gosh.
	Sorry, young Turks.
	I think this is just for historical sake.
	So let's look at the map here.
	Gerald, am I missing anything?
	I've got 209 Clinton, 239 Trump right now.
	I think you're pretty close.
	I put Georgia and Trump.
	I know they didn't call it, but I don't think there's any chance of that going any other way.
	Yeah, Fox News has a 222 to 202.
	Trump.
	And CNN's just slow to call things.
	It's still 187 to 197.
	They haven't called Florida yet.
	They haven't called Florida or Georgia.
	They haven't even called Washington either for Clinton.
	Utah, they haven't called.
	Yeah, CNN, you are...
	Behind.
	Yeah.
	And Anderson Cooper's saying, yes, we are!
	Yes.
	Yeah.
	I'm already getting some Trump fan feedback.
	Multiple stupid comments from G. Morgan Jr.
	here.
	It's fantastic.
	By the way, when I said that Trump cost them...
	They're saying you're stupid?
	Well, pretty much.
	I didn't say that he cost the Republicans anything.
	If you'll listen to what I said, I said is they thought that he was going to cost them something.
	So there's still some of those kind of feelings.
	We'll see how that goes.
	Blindly voting for Barack Obama because he's black and they think that they need some kind of change in that direction.
	Blindly following after somebody like Bernie Sanders because he's given them free college.
	Blindly following somebody like Hillary Clinton because she's the first woman president.
	You cannot blindly follow anybody.
	I don't care if it's Ronald Reagan and you're a Reagan Republican and you love the guy and he's somehow resurrected from the dead.
	You have to hold him accountable because positions of power will corrupt people ultimately.
	Okay.
	So don't yell at us when we hold people accountable.
	It's not going to be a pep rally for Donald Trump.
	We're going to do the same thing that we've been doing.
	Oh, yeah.
	That doesn't change.
	I know, but people think that it does.
	People think, okay, now that we have it, everything's going to be just fine.
	No.
	I am more scared with a president and both houses of Congress being controlled by that same party than I am when they're split, because at least when they're split, I know that stupid stuff isn't going to happen quite as easily.
	It does happen occasionally, but when they're both in power, I'm like, oh, crap.
	Yeah.
	Sometimes these guys just make bad decisions.
	Well, they better get this right at this time.
	And unlike the Bush administration, wartime president, I don't think he's a bad man.
	But unlike George Bush, they better actually start making some cuts.
	They better start reducing the debt.
	Donald Trump plan does not do that now, but I think you'll have some good advisors around him.
	And they better start actually acting like Republicans on that front.
	We could just do the bankruptcy thing and kind of clear the pages a little bit if we wanted to.
	What are they going to do?
	Attack us?
	Come on!
	China?
	What are they going to do?
	Screw them.
	No, I'm just kidding.
	Hopefully they're just going to throw their surplus baby girls at us.
	That went dark for a stream.
	That was bizarre.
	You know, if you're a single guy out there, man, go to China.
	Well, no, don't go to China.
	No, don't go to China.
	It's nothing but single guys.
	Single girl, sorry.
	Let's go the other way around.
	Single ladies from China, y'all come on over.
	Yeah.
	They feel a little bit entitled.
	You go over and like...
	Oh, you are a woman!
	That means you owe me sexual favor!
	No, no, that's not...
	Yes, I do, because your sister was drowned in a bathtub!
	No, I don't owe you...
	Oh, really?
	Are you a lesbian?
	No?
	Then you have no option!
	Honor your knee!
	What do you think Evan McMullen is doing right now?
	I don't know.
	The same thing!
	The same thing!
	The same thing he planned to do tonight.
	Well, that was kind of fun, you know?
	I got my name out there a little bit.
	It's not going to happen for a while, guys.
	All you people who voted for a third party candidate or wrote it in, I understand.
	Vote on principle.
	I can respect that.
	But if you did it because you didn't like either one of these candidates, you threw away your vote.
	You really did.
	Unless you really liked that candidate, I don't think you did anything.
	I don't think...
	Remember a lot of people months ago were saying, no, we're going to go third party, man.
	This is the year.
	This is the year.
	No, it was not the year.
	For it to be the year, guess what?
	It's never the year.
	You want it to be the year?
	Start now.
	2020.
	I don't understand doing it if you just really hate them.
	Yeah.
	And you're just like, I'm not voting for him, but not because you think there's an actual Bible for the party.
	No, not like this is the groundswell that's going to make it happen.
	No, you've got to have this thing working a long time before that.
	I was this close to writing in my ass.
	Yo, yo ass.
	My ass.
	Mine?
	Or yours?
	My ass.
	I was this close to running that in.
	My brother's watching this, and he knows.
	I was a catchphrase in our house for about three years.
	Anytime someone says, My ass!
	You say, Donald Trump's president.
	Donald Trump, my ass!
	What?
	Here's something surprising to me.
	Johnson only has 3.7% in Arizona.
	I would have thought it would have been higher there.
	Really?
	For Johnson.
	I wouldn't.
	Why, in Arizona?
	Arizona?
	Why?
	Isn't that not where he's from?
	No, New Mexico.
	New Mexico.
	Let's check New Mexico.
	Dummy.
	It's still remarkably a lot lower than I thought it would be.
	I think it's from somewhere around there with the border.
	Pennsylvania's tightened.
	Donald Trump has overtaken Hillary with a lead.
	That's fantastic, but his lead is shrinking in Michigan right now.
	He doesn't need it.
	He can still get to 270 without it, but he's down to 13,000 lead in Michigan, right?
	So that's tiny.
	How much of the vote is in?
	I'm looking for the percentage right now.
	57, I'm seeing.
	Okay.
	From CNN. CNN's late on updating everything.
	It could be 87 by now.
	If that's the trend, though, there's a strong chance he loses Michigan.
	Well, they're still thinking that a lot of what I'm hearing right now is that there's no way that he loses Wisconsin.
	No plausible way.
	That he loses Wisconsin?
	Right.
	So Wisconsin, if he takes Wisconsin, pretty much covers Michigan.
	And if he keeps that Florida, Florida doesn't have a recount or doesn't have some kind of legal battle.
	Let me do this here.
	I'm doing my hypothetical, Matt, for people watching, okay?
	So we'll give him Arizona, give him Iowa, give him Ohio, of course.
	And so we've given him all of this.
	Let's give him, if he doesn't get Michigan but he gets Wisconsin, he still needs New Hampshire or Nevada.
	Or that second district in Maine.
	So, with Wisconsin, without Michigan, that puts him at 269.
	Wisconsin without Michigan?
	Wisconsin without Michigan, assuming he doesn't get Nevada or New Hampshire, puts him at 269.
	What about P.A.? No, if he gets PA, he wins.
	You don't have him in PA in that one?
	No, I don't have him in PA. Gosh.
	To be at that point with him having a lead in both Wisconsin and Michigan, even though it's dwindling and now he has a lead in PA? Yeah.
	What happens tomorrow if we figure out that he wins PA, Wisconsin, and Michigan?
	If he wins all three, he gets 305.
	That's impressive.
	I don't think anybody thought, even if he won, that he would get 305.
	That's not a landslide by any means, 305.
	For Donald Trump in this election, that is a landslide.
	I mean, a landslide, you know, is Obama-McCain.
	But that is significant.
	So it's not outside the realm of possibility that he wins all three.
	Not...
	You know that he rearranges the rust?
	I wouldn't have called that.
	I wouldn't have called that tonight.
	I would have called at least one of those Michigan or Wisconsin going solidly for Clinton.
	Solidly.
	I thought...
	You always heard me say Wisconsin, I think, is more likely than Michigan.
	Yeah.
	I don't think Michigan's impossible.
	I still think Hillary will probably win Michigan or could win Michigan in 50-50.
	I think he'll probably win Wisconsin.
	I'm more surprised at Pennsylvania.
	Yeah.
	Pennsylvania is more surprising than me.
	Yeah, that's true.
	What was the last time I went red?
	Pennsylvania?
	Was it Reagan?
	Reagan.
	Reagan.
	Reagan and then Minnesota didn't even go red for Reagan.
	So I'm assuming Minnesota is obviously Clinton.
	It doesn't seem like anyone's talking about it.
	So Virginia.
	Has North Carolina and Florida, they've been officially called?
	By Fox.
	Oh, Fox called Wisconsin for Trump.
	Yeah.
	Wow.
	Okay.
	So, this is my hypothetical.
	Let's go to the map.
	Wisconsin for Trump.
	Wisconsin Trump.
	Wisconsin Trump, boy!
	Oh, we actually have Trump on the line.
	Hold on a second.
	Hold on a second.
	Okay.
	What's your favorite state outside of New York?
	It's always been Wisconsin because I love, I can't get enough cheese.
	All the, wherever I go, I gotta put cheese on everything.
	I eat all the cheese all the time with, and Wisconsin, you guys, you know, you know, that's, that's the whole thing.
	You make all the cheese, right?
	That's the whole.
	Well, I guess that's the whole thing.
	I don't know.
	That's, that's not a very good perspective.
	What?
	We don't have Hillary in Wisconsin.
	I don't know if she's gone on the line or not.
	So, alright, we got Trump at 249.
	Oh, wait, that doesn't count for Arizona.
	Sorry.
	Assuming he obviously wins Arizona, I would put him at 260.
	And Iowa would put him at 266.
	So, I'm assuming he gets Iowa and Arizona, of course.
	All he needs at this point is Michigan or Pennsylvania or New Hampshire or Nevada.
	That's crazy.
	So if he gets one more state, I think we can call it a night.
	Probably can.
	How much of this do you think is Scott Walker's doing?
	With all of the stuff that he took and the changes he implemented.
	That's a blue state that just went red.
	That's impressive.
	So thank you, Scott Walker, for helping the Republican Party out there.
	Or whatever it is.
	Yeah.
	So there's a bunch of people out there too that are never Trumpers.
	Fractured as it is.
	That are Republicans that just really can't stomach voting for Trump.
	And to you guys, we would kind of say, look, hopefully this guy does what every good president does.
	He puts a lot of smart, competent, well-rounded people around him.
	Or Dr.
	Ben Carson.
	If he puts Dr.
	Ben Carson around him, everyone's going to sleep for the next four years at the very least.
	Love the guy.
	Iowa Trump.
	So we just got Iowa Trump.
	So like I said, if Michigan, Pennsylvania, or New Hampshire, goes Trump, I'm calling the election.
	You would be one of the first.
	We got, oh, we got somebody in.
	Hey, that's fantastic.
	Iowa finally got it right.
	Okay, they got Ted Cruz, and I think they realized after his dad was implicated in the assassination of JFK, the corny sons of bitches in Iowa got one right.
	Thank you.
	Make America great again.
	There you go.
	There you go.
	He seems even in victory, though.
	He doesn't seem necessarily like...
	It's not super...
	It's not a big deal.
	It's not a big deal.
	He's been through bigger things.
	But I'm just saying he's not super polite about it.
	No.
	Not gracious.
	But, you know.
	All right.
	Leader of the free world, there's no need to be.
	It's just a waste of time.
	So look at this election right now.
	Look at this election.
	Look at Wisconsin.
	I mean, look at this.
	This is substantial here.
	What's the New York Times forecast?
	99%?
	It's crazy off the charts, yeah.
	So when they called Wisconsin form 49 to 45, that's a wider margin than anybody thought.
	It's 45.7 to 49.1, but that's significant.
	Yeah.
	So that's pretty impressive.
	I have to give some of my Texas friends, but your Texas listeners out there, a little bit of news.
	I believe the ballpark measure was approved.
	The Rangers get in a new stadium, and hopefully that'll end the World Series drought that we've been experiencing.
	I was going to say, so they can lose at a more expensive...
	Louis.
	I still hate you, St.
	I still hate you and the Blue Jays.
	I needed one more reason to hate Canada.
	There it is.
	Well, everyone hates St.
	Louis.
	Yeah, that's true.
	There's a few people I know and you know that don't, but it's...
	I'm angry at them still.
	Okay, let me see here.
	So, we're looking at...
	Pennsylvania, let's see what we got here.
	Pennsylvania, I've got 49 Clinton, 47 Trumps.
	Okay, and that's with 82%.
	So Pennsylvania's pulling back to Hillary.
	Oh, we've got live feed here.
	We've got live feed of the Clinton headquarters here.
	Oh, look at that!
	Look at that.
	It looks like cancer mixed with AIDS and diarrhea.
	I gotta say, there's something inside of me.
	Listen to that sound!
	That sounds like 1994.
	Yeah.
	Look at that her and Bill waltzing.
	Look at them.
	Look at them.
	Oh my gosh.
	It's like Requiem for a Dream.
	Oh my word.
	That's more depressing than the wrestler with Mickey Rourke.
	More depressing than the ending of Old Yeller.
	Oh my gosh.
	All the other guys.
	That's old news, Hillary.
	Oh, my word.
	Okay.
	That's sad.
	Let me look at Michigan here.
	Is it bad that I'm incredibly happy that this may be the end of the Clintons?
	Chelsea's not doing anything, so we're safe there.
	But this may be the end of Clintons in politics.
	I've grown up with the Clintons in politics my entire life.
	Chelsea's just doing shopping on that.
	That's fantastic.
	She's doing shopping on mommy's Saudi card.
	I'll do a GoFundMe to make sure that happens.
	I don't want any more Clintons.
	Running, trying to run, being involved in running, talking about running.
	Oh my gosh, that is the most depressing thing I've ever seen.
	The Young Turks stream.
	I will say, though, there is some liberation in honesty here.
	And none of us were big Trump fans, but everyone here, we talk about voting a straight Republican ticket.
	Like, okay, you get it.
	Yeah.
	None of us really had a huge dog in this fight.
	There is something very liberating about just being truthful, because here it's like, well, alright, we see it, and we get to crack jokes and have fun, and whoever wins, wins.
	If it's flipped around now and Hillary won, I'd be like, ah, crap, but my life wouldn't end.
	Here's the old Trump headquarters there.
	It looks like a Super Mario convention.
	It does, it does.
	It's the new Nintendo launch.
	Yeah, just all these...
	So many red hats.
	Make a big budget for those.
	Those aren't cheaper than $9.99 at Spencer's.
	Boy, is my internet awful.
	Alright, let's see.
	So, Michigan...
	Jolly sons of bitches.
	He's leading 1% in Michigan with 59% of the vote.
	Oh man, it's within...
	It's within...
	40,000 of each other.
	And there's a big district right out there, right outside of Detroit.
	Yeah.
	Lapeer?
	Yeah, Lapeer.
	Yeah.
	Which we know is Democrat territory.
	I mean, if you look around it right there, that would be one for sure.
	That would be Clinton.
	And then if you look at the other boxes, they'd be Trump, but there's not a lot of population like in Oscoda or in Gladwin.
	Well, Miss...
	And Muskegon is tied.
	I would have thought Muskegon would have been more Trump.
	I'm surprised.
	Muskegon seems tailor-made for Trump, Muskegon.
	Don't you think, Jared?
	I mean, very working, white class, lower-educated voters.
	Well, I mean, no college degrees, very working class, very manufacturing, manual labor.
	He's reached out very well to that voter.
	He really has.
	By the way, AP's finally calling Georgia for Donald Trump.
	I know we've had it for a while.
	I will say this.
	Looking at this map right now, I don't think Trump wins Michigan.
	That's probable.
	Looking at this right now, unless it still maintains where she only gets it by...
	But you know what?
	Even if she only wins it by 4% there in Lapeer, that is enough.
	So...
	Okay, so Michigan.
	That gives us a little bit of Michigan.
	Let's get a poll out there if people think he wins Michigan.
	And then it comes down to...
	So Wisconsin, Michigan, Pennsylvania.
	He already won Wisconsin.
	So it comes down to New Hampshire.
	Let me see what...
	Why isn't New Hampshire already...
	So New Hampshire is close, but he's about a two-point lead.
	But there's a lot of New Hampshire that hasn't come in.
	We've got Rudy Giuliani here.
	You want to hear what he has to say?
	What Rudy Giuliani has to say about the election?
	What position would you want in a Trump administration?
	Right now, right now...
	I'm drunk right now.
	I've had too many Scots whiskeys.
	I'm honestly happy at my law firm, my security firm.
	Doesn't he look drunk?
	He does.
	Hey Lester, have you heard of broken windows?
	I was the one who would incorporate that most.
	Man, Melissa McCarthy lost weight.
	I'm still praying.
	Mayor Giuliani and your wife, thank you so much for taking the time.
	By the way, no one at the FBI tipped me off, Lester.
	Not a lot of them.
	Ooh, Giuliani.
	Chuck Todd.
	Chuck Todd.
	President Trump may be something that everybody needs to hear.
	And we don't care.
	We'll bring that back up.
	I want to hear what Chuck Todd is saying.
	And I think we all thought it couldn't happen.
	Let me know when you meet the threshold of hearing.
	And guess what?
	He may just do it.
	Mike Murphy, what did you miss?
	Oh boy, I missed a lot.
	Under the normal rules of politics, He couldn't put it together, but he's broken the normal rules and he's getting votes he shouldn't get at a huge level among white America, where partisanship doesn't seem to have the same glue.
	States like Wisconsin, which are full of white Democrats who apparently in big numbers are voting for him.
	So right now, Michigan, I can see 100,000 votes for her out of Detroit.
	Wisconsin, I don't see it.
	I don't see it either.
	No, I can see that.
	I can see Michigan for sure.
	By her, Nicole.
	I mean, the paths are starting to get cut off for her.
	So, look, he's remade the Republican Party.
	This is not Paul Ryan's party.
	I think Paul Ryan's days as Speaker of the House are probably over tonight.
	Because I don't see...
	He's sitting too long.
	The House is going to respond differently.
	What is Arizona?
	Do we have any of Arizona in?
	I don't agree with it.
	I'm surprised that Arizona is as close as it is.
	I just said on talking to Nicole downstairs, there are millions of us, I didn't know there were that many people, concerned with the Supreme Court.
	Obamacare, Arizona, your last-hitch effort, the premium on the silver plan in Phoenix went up 100%.
	He would always look like he's wearing a wig that he left her down.
	So there is a vast number.
	Ron Johnson winning in Wisconsin.
	You know what I mean?
	Like a low-quality one that wasn't made for gel, but he decided to go for it anyways.
	Yeah, exactly.
	He's like, I'm going to gel this wig down because it's got a few straights.
	And they will save the Supreme Court.
	Let me throw a little, because I'm sure some Bernie bros are going to be talking about this.
	Does Bernie Sanders lose Wisconsin?
	Anybody?
	Who thinks Bernie Sanders would have lost Wisconsin?
	I always said Bernie Sanders.
	That's a good point.
	I think Bernie Sanders would have beaten Trump.
	The point is, was she uniquely unable to connect to this vote?
	I want to get in on being wrong, because I think we're probably going to race to the bottom.
	I was just going to say, well, the table's going to get crowded for us.
	Here's one thing that I'll just speak for myself that I got wrong.
	I think that people's tolerance for all these savory things that came out of Donald Trump's mouth, I mean, he was undeniably embracing racially charged language.
	Undeniably.
	No, he wasn't.
	Stop saying you're undeniably.
	Even at this point, they're stupid.
	All right, shut it off.
	Talking about grabbing a woman in Let's shut it off.
	Let's just shut off the CNN. I can't believe it.
	Undeniably, he was using racially charged...
	That clears it up for you.
	NBC News, yeah.
	Alright.
	If he wins Michigan, if he wins New Hampshire, if he wins Pennsylvania, we can call it.
	That's what I think.
	So...
	Bring up the image, ladderwithcredit.com slash mugclub, because I'm driving across the country tomorrow to our new studio starting up in January.
	We are launching this.
	We're partnering up with CRTV. LottoWithGrader.com slash MugClub.
	$99 for the year or $69 for the year if you use the promo code STUDENT. Lowercase, student, one word with an EDU email address.
	And you'll get my daily show.
	You'll get Jared's once a week Friday morning breakfast show.
	You'll get Michelle Malkin, Mark Stein, Mark Levin.
	It's going to be a big deal.
	And my God, we are going to absolutely take it to the left.
	I'm really excited about that aspect of it.
	Because my whole battle is not the political battle.
	It's the media battle.
	It's the cultural battle.
	And that is as relevant as ever.
	So I'm glad that politically, you know, things look better.
	But all this has done is, you know, aim the spotlight on all the cockroaches right now.
	But they're not gone yet.
	And that's what we're going to do with The Daily Show.
	What are you looking at there, Gerald?
	Nothing?
	Nothing to add?
	You non-contributing loser?
	I think I've contributed some.
	I've got a lot of people on Twitter saying I've done a great job.
	Great job.
	Fantastic.
	Frankly, the best...
	Though they turned on me when St.
	Louis became the topic, it became quite clear that their loyalties weren't very deep.
	No.
	Not as deep as Hillary's pockets, and it's all for naught.
	I'm glad you said pockets.
	Yeah, pockets on her.
	Little pantsuit.
	Yeah, according to Fox, he is 16.
	16 delegates away from 270.
	According to Fox?
	According to Fox.
	Well, I've basically got him four away, because I'm assuming he wins Arizona.
	So if you take away Arizona, yeah.
	If you take away Arizona, he's 15 away, but let's give him Arizona.
	It's unbelievable.
	So all he needs is either Michigan, Pennsylvania, or New Hampshire.
	Or Nevada.
	I don't think he's going to get Nevada.
	Just because the early vote was too severe in Nevada.
	He could, but the early vote was too crazy.
	Do we have any polls in Nevada yet?
	Let's see what we got.
	Let me see what we have in Nevada.
	Sorry, folks, but that's one thing.
	That would have meant that he won by a 10-point margin on the day of with Nevada.
	Where's Nevada?
	CNN. Where are you with Nevada?
	CNN. I've got 63% in.
	Clinton up 50% to 43%.
	Trump.
	So he's down about 50,000 votes there.
	Oh, well, he definitely made up some ground because he was down $72,000.
	Yeah.
	There's a lot of people that look pretty silly right now, and they're trying to figure out how to explain it.
	Yeah.
	I don't know how they keep their jobs with stuff like this.
	I mean, I get it because it's an inexact science, and you're really trying to look at a lot of different data, but they're so sure.
	I love that their world is being shaken right now.
	I hope we end up liking the shaking.
	Don't get me wrong, but...
	It just shakes their perception.
	They thought they knew.
	What the diehard Trump people need to do is not gaslight everyone.
	People like Andrew Klavan are very different from the people you just saw at NBC. Or people like myself who said, you know, 60-40, I don't see him switching Michigan.
	I'm not saying he can't win.
	I don't think it's likely.
	That's very different from...
	There's no way Trump's going to win.
	So I hope that hardcore Trump fans, instead of destroying all the people who didn't agree with him 100%, which is what happens in the age of new media, I sincerely hope, if nothing else, we move forward today going, all right.
	Let's take this and create a bigger coalition.
	Because the only way we have a bigger coalition and we recreate the Republican Party, the conservative movement, is if we bring these people into the fold, not if we eliminate.
	Like, listen, you don't want to get rid of, you know, the educated sort of, the pseudo-intellectual, if you want to call them conservatives, you know, the NROs, the Thomas Sowles, the Ted Cruz's, the Mitt Romney's.
	You still want them to, and bring in this new Trump demographic.
	Assuming we still believe in limited government, assuming we still believe in non-interventionism, assuming we still believe in actual trade, assuming that there is some semblance of limited government principles there, people need to come under that banner as opposed to, I told you so, and launch everyone else under the bus along with CNN and NBC. I know Ben Shapiro's upset, but Ben Shapiro did not say Trump had no chance.
	Right.
	I think it would make us just like we felt like the Democrats were being when Obama was elected, when he became president and everybody just kind of was like, get out of his way.
	He's going to run roughshod.
	He's going to change everything.
	He's going to do whatever he wants to do.
	I don't think that's what we need to do.
	In any form of negotiation, you always look for a small...
	point of agreement to work with and then build kind of a bridge a bridgehead there right you're a beachhead there you want to you want to do that and i understand that the first hundred days in a presidency is when you're really going to get stuff done because after that people are thinking midterms after that you're thinking re-election and things just kind of spiral out of control right but don't try to do something that's going to make the country hate us do something that's productive for everybody get people on the same page yeah i think that's far more productive than trying to go out there and do some crazy
	i think if donald trump goes in and says i'm putting hillary clinton in jail i think he ruins the country yeah Exactly.
	I really do.
	I know.
	I think you should come in and say, listen, you know, this was a surprise.
	I told you, she's a crook.
	She's a crook, I told you.
	I really hope he doesn't do that.
	I mean, I would have liked to be in jail, but he needs to allow the process to occur.
	Yeah, and he needs to get out of the way, you know?
	He needs to find a Democrat special prosecutor if that's necessary for this.
	Somebody that can appear completely unbiased.
	And let the process work itself out.
	Because ultimately that's what we're fighting for.
	We're fighting for an idea, guys and gals out there voting for Clinton or Trump.
	We're fighting for ideas.
	America's an idea.
	It's lit the world for the better part of over two centuries now.
	So let's let it keep doing that.
	Someone said I forgot Arkansas.
	I didn't forget Arkansas.
	I put Arkansas on the map.
	It doesn't exist.
	It's Arkansas.
	I don't understand what they're saying.
	Well, they're saying Trump only needs Arizona, Alaska, or one...
	Oh, you know what?
	Never mind.
	Not Arkansas.
	He said Alaska.
	I did forget Alaska.
	He needs one vote then.
	That is a good point.
	If he wins Alaska, he needs one.
	He's at 269 if he has Alaska.
	So if he wins Michigan or Pennsylvania or New Hampshire, I'm calling.
	I think it's possible.
	I'm looking at Pennsylvania right now.
	If you look at the districts that are not called yet Erie, that's very right-leaning.
	I was just there recently.
	Very trampolining rural area.
	Lake Erie is the worst of the Great Lakes.
	This is Erie County.
	It is the worst.
	I've jet skied on the thing.
	I used to go out there all the time.
	Yeah, you stayed above the water.
	Did you dare go below it?
	I did.
	My accident one time.
	I know.
	He jet skied there and he got planter's warts on his balls.
	That's not true.
	That's not true!
	I don't even know how it's possible, but you did it.
	I'm a single man looking for a great room.
	You're going to say something like that?
	I can't defend himself.
	No, no, no.
	Mute it.
	Mute it.
	Come on!
	Yes.
	I guess you should call them balsers.
	Pennsylvania still has Lawrence district or the county.
	Are these districts or counties?
	But Lawrence, Erie.
	There's a few around Philadelphia that have not been called yet that are probably all suing Hillary, but there are several of them there that are still leading Trump and some that will definitely go to Trump.
	So that's still a dead heat toss-up.
	I can see that one going either way.
	I could see that one going either way.
	Let me see about Maine.
	Because he only needs the one district in Maine.
	He's doing pretty well in New Hampshire, it looks like, too.
	Yeah, it doesn't look like he's doing well in New Hampshire.
	There's not a lot to vote in in New Hampshire.
	If he wins New Hampshire, he wins.
	We can call it, and I'll go to bed.
	I don't think it'll be a Gerald Ford situation where we go to bed and they wake us up and...
	Sorry, we were wrong about that.
	The guy who wears a sweater with the air conditioning beat you.
	What?
	The peanut guy.
	Holy crap.
	So I don't think we'll have that.
	I think if he wins, if any other state gets called, let's go to the Young Turks, let's see what they're doing.
	If any other state gets called, Pennsylvania, Michigan, New Hampshire.
	We saw people at the Hillary headquarters weeping.
	Let's see what we can find out.
	Were they actually weeping?
	Yeah, I saw it.
	It was on screen for a second.
	This chick was just weeping.
	It was possibly the best thing about staying up past midnight today.
	Oh gosh, we have to unload this whole studio.
	I know.
	And pack up.
	I have to leave this house.
	I'm going to be so sad.
	Is this an ad for the Young Turks, or is this the Young Turks?
	It's tough to know.
	What are they making me watch?
	It is the Young Turks, but I think this is an ad for them.
	We don't want to give them that.
	Who is this?
	Who is this chick?
	Which was one of the most scariest things I've ever done in my life.
	They have nothing else to go to.
	What's one of the most scariest things?
	That.
	That is graphics 48...
	This is how they want you to see that they're professional news people.
	Yeah.
	We have headsets.
	What is it like working with my teacher?
	I look up to her as a mentor and I want to do really good work for her.
	She just works so hard.
	See, this is why I like the Trump win because she might kill herself.
	That's the silver lining.
	Yes.
	The silver lining is Anna Kasparian's Padawan.
	This is real news.
	Why are we watching this?
	I wanted to watch the live stream.
	This is awful.
	This is terrible.
	Sweetheart, if you're watching Hillary, good Hillary, I'll see you in a couple of days.
	In a new America, well, you can defend yourself.
	Just move past the planter's balls warts.
	It's false.
	It's patently false.
	Oh, come on.
	Patently?
	I don't even know what that means.
	But patently, I do know what it means.
	Go ahead.
	What do you want to say?
	No, I don't want to say anything.
	I just want to defend myself.
	You're not allowed to defend yourself.
	How's this even right?
	I thought you were for free speech.
	I don't know.
	We're waiting on a couple of things here.
	We're waiting on two last things for this to happen.
	It's really a tightrope walk, isn't it?
	It's a tightrope walk.
	And we'll call it.
	Do we all feel comfortable calling it if he wins Pennsylvania or Michigan or New Hampshire?
	Do we all feel comfortable going to bed calling it?
	Yeah, absolutely.
	Jamie Dupree says, so what's the delay?
	Are the folks on the decision desk having a drink before they call the race or what?
	In the meantime, we have new viewers you may not be aware of.
	I thought we lost all the viewers.
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	A NEW COMMERCIAL!
	So, for people who don't know, listen, this mug is just a token.
	No, it is.
	It's nice.
	Looked.
	Hand-etched.
	We were hashtag never daily, but the Exploratory Committee, which Jared headed up, said you need to go daily, especially in the face of this election and the media.
	I don't want to insult you by saying it's unanimous, but it was unanimous.
	So, louderwithcredit.com slash mug club, $99 per year or $69 per year right now.
	Enter in the promo code STUDENT, S-T-U-D-E-N-T, lowercase.
	Jared, we should add that there, enter in promo code STUDENT. Enter in the promo code STUDENT, $69.
	That's less than $6 a month, and you get this mug, which, by the way, would actually be about...
	Twenty-something dollars in stores with a hand.
	It's actually etched by hand by someone here in America.
	And what does it mean?
	What do you get?
	Well, listen.
	All the stuff that's free, still free, once a week show on iTunes, on YouTube, all the videos on YouTube.
	We're going to have more clips on YouTube, more short videos on YouTube, actually.
	We'll probably have a video every single day on YouTube in 2017, at least five videos a week, all the articles at loudworthcrowder.com.
	But if you want the daily show, Loudworth Crowder, every single day, you want it to be your late-night show...
	You subscribe at louderwithcreditor.com slash mugclub.
	We partnered with CRTV. So not only for $69 for the year do you get me, Jared's show, you get Mark Levin, Mark Stein, Michelle Malkin.
	Bring it up, Not Gay Jared, you son of a...
	It's coming.
	Mark Levin, Mark Stein, him and Gerald are playing grab asses.
	You get Mark Levin, Michelle Malkin, Mark Stein.
	And listen, here's one thing, too.
	I'm not challenging you here.
	We don't want to do a Patreon, but we're giving you a mug.
	We're giving you a daily show to people who would be paid millions on a network.
	A lot of these people, if you look at Mark Levin, you look at Mark Stein, you look at Michelle Malkin, there's no doubt that they've been offered contracts with networks also yours.
	Truly, we've decided to do this directly for you.
	We're going to give you apps.
	We're going to give you the ad-free experience.
	You'll be able to hear this anywhere.
	And you get to employ...
	People here at Loud with Crowder, we actually employ a lot of people who work really hard.
	Let me show you who we have.
	We have on the team right now, we've got Courtney, who works with us full-time.
	We've got Casey.
	We've got Brodigan.
	We just hired Corey.
	On the video side, we have Jared.
	We have Aaron.
	We have Francine, who's going to be our full-time wardrobe, makeup.
	And then we have about three or four more hires.
	There'll be another golden ticket hiring spree.
	So if you really want to take media back, you really want to see an alternative where you go on YouTube, as conservatives should create an alternative to YouTube, well, here's the best of both worlds.
	We don't have to create an alternative.
	We can still be on YouTube where the hundreds of millions of people who either watched or read us, have seen us for free, can still find us, can still see your comments.
	You can still interact for free.
	You can still show your friends the free content because there will be more of it than ever.
	And we have an alternative platform at a very low price that keeps it safe so we don't lose touch.
	And it allows you to support the infrastructure.
	And create more content and go out there.
	We really have tried to think it through and provide you with something.
	We didn't want to do a Patreon.
	We didn't want to do a please give us money.
	We wanted, as capitalists, to create something that was so valuable and so worth it that you could take part in a way that you were happy to do and we were proud to do.
	We also have the merch store up.
	Steven Crowder, what is it, letterwithcrowder.com?
	Lotterwithcrowdershop.com.
	Get your socialism is for figs.
	You can go there.
	Well, you can't get the mug unless you join the mug club.
	It's the only way to get the mug is to join the mug club.
	You can join monthly, but you don't get the mug if you join monthly because it's like a $25 mug to get shipped to you.
	It's not cheap.
	We're taking a bath on this one, Rock!
	You get the mug, you pay for the mug.
	And watch, we'll still get people complaining, like, well, couldn't you just give it to me?
	I don't want to pay for something.
	It's cheaper than Netflix!
	If you're a student, much cheaper than Netflix or Hulu.
	It's the cheapest service there is out there, and you will have hours and hours of content every day.
	Plus, Not Gay Jared.
	Support Not Gay Jared.
	He needs to eat.
	He's gonna have his own show there.
	Yeah, I'm living in a box in your basement.
	Next to your food supply, it's gone.
	Hopefully it still works.
	We had a crash earlier, so go back, try and sign up, try tomorrow, or call the phone number.
	It'll be on Twitter.
	We had thousands of people go on and try and sign up, and then it just crashed our servers, which is a perfect example of why we need you to sign up in the first place.
	You've seen low budget, we are no budget.
	And that's about to change, and we're going to grow and hopefully make you guys proud.
	Like I said, you may join the Mug Club, and you see us every day.
	You'll have us on your app, wherever you go.
	You may not agree with everything we say, but we promise you our main goal is always to entertain, to keep you laughing, and to be intellectually honest with you.
	Unless, number one supersedes number two.
	Like, for example, if we just find a joke that's really funny about spirit cooking with Huma and a lesbian orgy, we're like, well, we have to go for it.
	And you'll be like, but isn't that just a blatant lie?
	Yes.
	It is.
	We got these sorry saps back up.
	You want to see them for a second?
	The Young Turks?
	For sake of simplicity, right?
	The guys are like...
	Look at that energy.
	Establishment window.
	Low energy.
	I thought it was going to be about...
	What did I... I had it at about 1.5% to 2.5%, right?
	That's what I had right before the election.
	Turns out, nope, it was 5%.
	And 5% will make all the difference in the world.
	Obviously...
	Everything that you've said over the past three minutes...
	I like Dave Rubin so much more as the resident gay than this guy.
	...has to be done, and it's what we have some control over that we can work towards.
	But at the same time, tens of millions of Americans are totally fine with a man who is driven almost purely by racism and sexism.
	Oh, shut up, you piece of shit!
	This is what bothers me.
	I'm sorry, but this is what really...
	Gerald can't hear me.
	He's like, 10 million Americans are driven by someone who's entirely driven by racism.
	I'm like, that's not it.
	Again, my issues with Donald Trump are...
	I'm not against free, honest trade.
	I don't want to tax Ford if they put a plant in Mexico if they still employ Americans, okay?
	I don't want to punish people for being successful.
	I don't want a capital gains tax.
	I have legitimate grievances with Donald Trump.
	None of them are Donald Trump is racist.
	I do not believe that the majority of people today...
	Let's do the math here real quick, okay?
	Let me...
	So you can tweet this out.
	Tweet me at S. Crowder.
	I'm going to get Anna Kasperian real talk now because let's do some math here.
	I've not talked about, I've not heard anyone else talking about this.
	This means if you look at these maps, that a majority of the bleed over to Donald Trump are people who voted for Barack Obama and felt screwed.
	They didn't vote for Barack Obama.
	Then just, you know what?
	I hate Negroes.
	I hate the colored people.
	I'm going to vote Trump.
	They voted Barack Obama in their own self-interest.
	They felt like they got screwed.
	And now they voted for Donald Trump.
	The vast majority of white Americans voted for Barack Obama, and now the vast majority of Americans are voting for Donald Trump.
	So you can't say that these same people, because there's a huge amount of people, if you look at that crossover, that these people were voting for progress with Donald Trump, with Barack Obama, and now all of a sudden they're racist because they pulled the lever for Trump because you screwed them.
	You screwed them with the taxes on small businesses.
	You screwed them with a healthcare mandate that they couldn't afford, then punished them to force them to buy healthcare insurance when they didn't want to, and then raised those premiums 25%.
	And the people who did vote for Obama, who were even more privileged, who didn't have to get put into the Obamacare program, saw their premiums go up by 40-something percent.
	You screwed the progressive Christians and Catholics who voted for Barack Obama, who you then mandated to pay for somebody else's abortion.
	You screwed them by putting Lena Dunham's sorry face or ass, I don't know which, when she's on the air and made her a wing of your party.
	The people who voted for Barack Obama, a significant amount of them, Donald Trump could not win without enough of those votes.
	And those people aren't racist.
	There are a lot of criticisms to have with Donald Trump.
	No, it's because of you.
	When you call someone racist, when you call them sexist, when you call them homophobic, when you call them transphobic because they don't want a tranny taking a dump next to their six-year-old daughter in some Charlotte Chuck E. Cheese, guess what?
	They pull the lever for Trump after they voted for Obama, you dick!
	So stop acting like the only possible motivating factor here that you could fathom is racism.
	I bet you're the kind of guy who walks into a bar and they don't like you.
	You know, what is it, because I'm a Turk?
	No!
	It's because you smell.
	You look like a greasy, slick water buffalo who's drowning amidst the throes of being swallowed by an anaconda.
	And you're a dick!
	It's not because you're brown, just like it's not because Donald Trump's racist.
	Gerald, what did you want to say?
	Man, that'll preach.
	I was standing up with a hanky.
	Just, man.
	Woo!
	Are you okay?
	Somewhere, Sheriff Joe Clark is just losing his shit.
	He heard it all.
	And somewhere, Black Lives Matter said, DO WHAT HE SAID! Dude, what do you think?
	I just have one question for you, Stephen.
	Sorry, Hopper.
	Hopper's growling over here because he thinks it's about to go down because Stephen's angry.
	He's coming to his right.
	Do you feel better?
	I do feel better.
	Okay, that's good.
	Did it make sense, though?
	Absolutely.
	Just look at the numbers.
	A significant amount of the Trump voters were Obama voters.
	All of a sudden, people overnight can become racist.
	They can't be the smartest people in the world when they vote one way and the dumbest people in the world when they go the other way.
	That's a little bit of a double standard, and it keeps us from coming together.
	If you just demonize the other side and say they're either stupid or they're the racist vote, anything like that, you can't do it.
	You can't do it.
	We couldn't do it.
	Sorry, I wish I didn't say dipshit in a rant, because then I'm like Anna Kasperian.
	I didn't use the F word like Anna Kasperian, but I could have made the point without cussing.
	She can only make her point with cussing.
	This night has been long.
	I tell you what, I feel like John McCain.
	There's the stamina it takes to get through this.
	Not John McCain 2008.
	Wait, what?
	John McCain Vietnam.
	Just the stamina it takes to get through this night.
	Did you just compare yourself on a radio show to a man being tortured in the military?
	This is what this whole night feels like, waiting for it to be called.
	You're a dork.
	We're going on five hours here, Steven.
	That's a long show.
	And it's been content filled.
	People said make that rant a separate video.
	You should.
	Jared, time code it.
	But I will say this.
	Your brother says that you're giving the Turks way too much importance.
	Yeah, well, my brother's a dumbass.
	And he's fired.
	You love him.
	We all love him.
	Jordan, you understand why we give them attention.
	It's so funny.
	It's a layup.
	In a night like tonight, we need a layup.
	We've got five hours to fill!
	What?
	We cannot be Dwayne Wade!
	We need some low-hanging fruit here, and they provide lots.
	Oh, man.
	You know what?
	I'm not drunk, but I really wish I were.
	This is my favorite version of the Young Turks for now, by the way.
	Just that.
	Spitting.
	No, come on.
	Stop it.
	That guy's never spit.
	I think he is an absolute horrible broadcaster.
	That just happened.
	Stop it.
	Stop it.
	Everyone has dirty minds and I'm sick of it!
	Shut it.
	Just shut it.
	Let me guess, did we see some kind of a spike with that rant, probably?
	People just unsubscribed.
	This server crashed for a different reason.
	Delete my credit card, please.
	Delete the credit cards.
	So, let me tell you something, okay?
	Thousands of people signing up for the Mug Club in one night.
	Thousands of people have subscribed.
	We crossed half a million tonight subscribers.
	We crossed 300,000 Twitter followers.
	I say we because I know this is my personal stuff.
	I was doing it before Jared.
	But I really do.
	I can't take credit for all this.
	The team who you help employ when you join the Mug Club.
	Jared, Aaron, Courtney, Casey, Gerald, who comes in.
	I don't pay.
	I get a beer.
	Yeah, he does.
	He gets beer and he gets free lifts.
	I wouldn't be able to do it without them.
	And so when I say we, these are huge victories.
	Now, if you do the math, we have 300,000 Twitter followers, half a million YouTube subscribers.
	It's tough to read, but our podcast, we're doing hundreds of thousands for every single full three-hour show, not including clips.
	We have 1.7 million people on Facebook.
	If 5% of you people out there who benefit from the work that this team creates and you want to see daily content, you want that daily show that you know we can create, that you know we're going to create, we always go above and beyond as far as trying to create and add value, subscribe.
	5% of you do it.
	And CNN, MSNBC, NBC, Young Turks, they can't hold a candle to us.
	I'm telling you this.
	I promise.
	Test me on this.
	5% of you.
	And I know we can do better than that if our server doesn't crash like it did tonight.
	I want you to all sign up, just not at the same time.
	Use the digital turnstile.
	Okay.
	You have your screen on your thing, Stephen.
	I'm texting you a tweet I just want you to bring up because it's priceless.
	So according to CNN... I don't even know who this guy is.
	According to CNN, Pennsylvania is 48.3 with 48.2 with Clinton leading.
	Oh, I know who Pat Dollar is.
	Bring up the tweet.
	Bring it up.
	Hillary's staff is now openly crying at their offices in Victory HQ. I don't know if that's true, though.
	I don't know, but that face...
	Such a good face.
	That's a good face.
	I love that face.
	Oh, I don't like her crying.
	I know.
	I don't like seeing people hurt or crying.
	Of course not.
	Unless it's Anna Kasparian.
	I would not mind seeing her thrown off a cliff.
	There's always an exception to the rule.
	I would not mind seeing Chen give her a fresh one.
	Oh, well.
	It's true.
	His ancestors did to her ancestors.
	Ouch.
	Why are you going to bring that up?
	Because it's funny.
	Again, there's no other reason.
	The young Turks are not relevant, but they're funny.
	That is funny.
	Well, you know.
	Trump's ahead by 42,000 with 93% reporting in PA. He takes PA. It's ballgame.
	If he takes...
	Yeah, if he takes...
	I want to call the night now.
	I'm done.
	That was your...
	I'm ready.
	I'm just so tired of everything always being...
	Like, that's the silver...
	I'm not a Trump fan because of policy-wise.
	Like, I agree with him more than Hillary.
	And I don't...
	The main thing is I don't trust him.
	But I don't think he's a racist.
	I don't think he hates black people.
	I don't think he hates Mexican people.
	What are my brothers?
	Oh, my brothers.
	Just look at this.
	Look at this.
	This is my brother.
	I voted he has rye there.
	He's a 1776 rye.
	You were talking about this today.
	We were at Smitty's.
	Yeah, Smitty's Liquor.
	By the way, thank you, Smitty's, for...
	You didn't sponsor us, but I know they're fans.
	I tell you what, though.
	Gerald has been with me, you know, how much...
	It's uncomfortable the more I get recognized.
	I don't like it, because I used to just go out in sweats and, like, would just look like crap.
	And now it's just...
	I feel paranoid all the time.
	It's going to force you to sober up your wardrobe.
	Yeah.
	Look at this.
	This is Hillary Camp.
	Man, that's depressing.
	Hillary Campaign right here.
	Headquarters.
	These guys had to go into the night thinking, we got this locked up.
	Like Browns fans on every Sunday.
	Or Cubs fans for the last 800.
	You can just see the collective.
	I have to rethink my life's decisions.
	That's right.
	Some good-looking girls they shoved in front of the camera, but they're not as good-looking when they cry.
	Can I say this, too?
	Oh, look at that seek.
	I have to get back to driving my cab.
	Hey, come on.
	Shut up, it's funny.
	Come on!
	No, I think the one great thing to do...
	Hey, look, it's the kid from Bad Santa!
	Shit!
	We've gone off the rails.
	Okay, go ahead, Bill.
	I think it's a great opportunity.
	People were voting for Hillary because she's a woman.
	How about we put a qualified woman, right?
	I want the first woman president not to be elected because she's a woman, because she has great ideas.
	That's what I want.
	Like a Fiorina.
	Somebody like that where you can go, yeah, she's going to do a good job.
	That person doesn't exist.
	It's Bruce, or he should give the bill back.
	I would like to announce, as far as my exploratory committee, I'm going to run for president.
	Okay.
	I have decided to run on the Republican ticket, also to formally register as one with Dick and Ball.
	To take down the establishment, that is.
	The establishment and Batman.
	I wanted to take down the patriarchy, but I didn't want to cut off my dick.
	Okay, so I have a new rule that should be proposed for Loudwood Crowder.
	There should be a 12 o'clock cutoff.
	There really should.
	The wheels start coming off a little bit.
	We have to get up at 637.
	Yeah, it sounds great.
	Oh, 538 is already calling it, from what I understand.
	All right.
	Yeah, I'm not seeing anything else yet.
	I'm not seeing a whole bunch yet.
	Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh.
	Jordan said, Steven's Jenner sounds like Buffalo Bill.
	You think I'm joking about...
	Yes.
	Okay, okay, ready for this?
	You think I'm joking about, uh, about the Joker.
	This is the Joker from the old Batman cartoon.
	Listen.
	In a few minutes, I'll pull that lever.
	The Chicago fire looks like a vacuum.
	Oh, he can't hear.
	He can't hear.
	Uh, let, let Gerald hear.
	You hate to be a wet blanket, Joker, but your barbecue is canceled.
	Batman is camping.
	Hold on.
	It will melt everything in its path.
	Gee whiz, let's break it up.
	Get set for a swing-in, chump.
	Ready for it?
	The detonator is fully charged.
	I tell you!
	Okay, now I get a Caitlyn Jenner clip.
	Make the Chicago fire look like a backyard cookout.
	Now let's do a- Yeah.
	I'm going to pull up here.
	Hey, just so you know, you are going to have to drive some of the...
	Okay, yeah.
	That's fantastic.
	You can sleep.
	We'll switch off.
	I was planning on doing the whole thing, but...
	Yeah.
	You know...
	Gerald and I have a 16-hour drive tomorrow with a 100-pound dog in the back who hasn't eaten dinner yet, so there's a good chance he's going to throw up in the car.
	I fed him.
	I fed him before the show.
	Did he eat any, though?
	Yeah, maybe.
	You know.
	His food was offered.
	I mean, he'll live...
	Here we go.
	I'm bringing it up.
	I'm waiting for the stupid ad.
	The stupid ad on YouTube that pays my salary.
	Four, three, two, one.
	And here is some of the Vanity Fair here.
	I'll bring it up as soon as I get the broader self queued up here.
	All right.
	The other side of the mountain.
	Give it to Gerald.
	I would wear sweatshirts with hoods on them so paparazzis can't get pictures.
	and with my finger on it.
	It's uncanny!
	I don't believe it!
	He's got a career in voice.
	I think it's worse at the ESPY speech.
	It's probably worse.
	You can hear it better.
	A truly extraordinary moment.
	An American hero at the Olympics.
	We're gonna find it here.
	Trump back to PA again.
	And I thought, wouldn't that be a nice way to go through life?
	I look at women all the time.
	I think this is going to take a little while to call this thing.
	Yeah, I really do.
	That's the hard part.
	You don't want to give up.
	Hey, Jared, do we have any of those prepared with CR commercials so I can go to the bathroom?
	Actually, I was thinking about that.
	I got one of these right here.
	Alright, let's do this.
	Run that commercial so I can go to the bathroom, and then you guys can handle it, and then you guys can obviously go.
	All right.
	Sounds good.
	All right.
	So, Joe.
	And...
	You don't have to be a doomsday prepper to want to be prepared.
	Natural disaster, riots, any kind of civil unrest, it just helps to have peace of mind and know that if you need it, you've got a 30-day supply of food.
	And that's why right now with a promotional offer from louderwithcrowder.com, you can call 888-457-3453 or go to preparewithcr.com.
	That's 888-457-3453 or go to preparewithcr.com.
	You can get your 30-day full supply of food.
	Set it somewhere.
	Forget about it.
	$99 shipped.
	140 servings.
	I just keep it in my basement.
	It's actually, I tried some with my wife.
	It's pretty good.
	It's tasty stuff.
	Oh yeah, their chocolate pudding is actually really pretty tasty.
	How are you breathing with that?
	Damn it.
	Damn it.
	Thank you.
	And that is a real product.
	That is not a joke product.
	We screw with people a lot, but that is real, and it's good.
	It's good.
	I don't want to say I've been digging into Crowder's stash when he locks me away, but we do what we have to do to get by.
	There's some benefit to being in the basement that long?
	Yes.
	Is that what you're saying?
	Yes.
	I'm glad you made it out.
	I appreciate it.
	Yeah, but prepare with CR.com to get your supply of food there.
	Yeah.
	99 bucks shipped.
	And that mug comes in handy, too, right?
	The mug has nothing to do with it.
	No, I'm just saying it comes in handy when preparing food.
	You can make soup in that thing if you wanted to.
	It is, but these are two different pitches.
	You're mixing up the pitches.
	I'm not sticking on Crowder's duty now of demeaning you.
	Online, that was a pretty good segue, I thought, to the Muck Club.
	Muck Club.
	You ruined it.
	Yeah, thanks a lot.
	There you go.
	69 for students.
	With the code STUDENT because we want to keep it nice and simple.
	And you'll still complain to mix it up and forget about it.
	I think it's alternating letters capitalized.
	I'm not going to tell you where to start either.
	The possibilities are endless.
	Let's look at this.
	Here we go.
	Back to the Hillary Clinton headquarters there.
	That looks depressing.
	That is incredibly depressing.
	I mean...
	They thought they'd be cheering right now.
	This guy's leaning over like, are you serious?
	This guy's winning?
	You gotta be kidding me.
	I have no idea.
	This is a nightmare for them.
	This is their worst dream come true.
	Ringing of hands, the face in the hand there, the guy scratching his head.
	And I do have to say, everyone knows that I was reluctantly a Trump voter.
	That I was not happy about it.
	I still say it just shocks me.
	It behooves me.
	It behooves us all that 300 years of warring for democracy has led us to having to choose between these two asshats.
	That said...
	I am incredibly happy to pull the lever, see all this happen, and just watch the head spin of everyone on the left who just thought this is their worst nightmare.
	I think a lot of them actually in some ways gave a lot of credence to the fact that this was a possibility.
	Maybe not by this margin.
	But I still do enjoy watching this.
	I'm going to all the Twitter profiles of friends of mine and acquaintances who I know are just beside themselves and booking their flight out of the country.
	That's fair.
	That is a squirrel.
	That is a squirrel.
	I'm having a serious moment.
	This is what happens to Steven after midnight, guys.
	This is why he doesn't do a midnight show.
	He just can't do it.
	I'm sorry.
	I didn't know it was a serious moment.
	I was having a heart-to-heart with 30,000 people.
	30,000 people just laughed.
	It's okay.
	Don't worry about it.
	It happens.
	You're just a squirrel.
	You ready?
	He's jumping back in.
	He's kicking me back out.
	They're still holding on to something better happening.
	They all think something's better.
	It's coming down the road in this live stream.
	Do you want to give them the front seat?
	Yeah.
	All right.
	It'll keep me occupied.
	Gosh, my knee hurts.
	I can barely walk.
	Sorry, I am back, people.
	Let's tweet it out that I am back.
	No, hold on.
	People are asking.
	No, you have to sign up.
	Sorry for ruining your moment, Jared.
	That's okay.
	I thought you were just being you.
	Well, I'm full of surprises.
	Okay.
	But yeah, CRTV, right there.
	Back with AdPromo.
	Yeah, I got Hopper Frostypaw because he hasn't eaten dinner.
	No, hold on a second, hold on a second.
	Do we have something coming in?
	Put Hopper on camera, babe.
	He will love it.
	Put him in your chair.
	Do you think we can get Hopper on this chair?
	Not when Frostypaws are going on.
	Not when Frostypaws are going on.
	You're asking for just a massacre of ice cream.
	It looked like your bed the other day with ice cream and beer.
	They're walking out.
	Someone said please simulcast the MSNBC stream.
	Look, they're leaving.
	They're leaving.
	Who's that?
	Did something happen?
	What guy's holding his ear?
	Did he get punched?
	I hope he got punched.
	Oh, no.
	No, they're going to their seats.
	Well, hopefully they sit on their thumbs and rotate.
	This is how Hillary Clinton voters take their seats.
	It's past midnight.
	I don't know what you're expecting at this point.
	How many Hillary voters can you fit on a stool?
	Approximately four, Stephen.
	Approximately four.
	I'm going to turn it upside down.
	Yeah, look at the place.
	Look at that.
	Oh my gosh.
	They know it's done.
	They know it's done.
	They have got to know it's done.
	Well, that's good.
	They tried to act patriotic with the American flags there.
	It was a wise use of budget.
	Hold on a second.
	Keep talking.
	Look at them.
	Look at them.
	Well, I think Kleenex and tissue brands everywhere will see a little uptick tonight.
	Tomorrow.
	These filthy hipsters weep.
	Look at them.
	Look at them.
	This is just sad.
	I almost feel bad watching.
	I feel kind of bad watching.
	Oh, it can't be true.
	Oh, it can't be.
	Yes, it is.
	I don't think he don't man around no more.
	Oh my gosh.
	That podium's right in the heartland of America, right where everything was lost.
	That looks like Ninja Warrior, how big that is.
	You expect a little Asian to climb to it, like, I will not accept the Hillary laws!
	America!
	I can't believe!
	Oh, man.
	They just know if...
	Even Fox News knows if they know any other state they announce and clear.
	It's over.
	It'll throw them right over the...
	Can we get...
	They're just holding it there.
	Can we get the MSNBC? You want to get the NBC? MSNBC. Let's see if we get MSNBC. MSNBC. Yup.
	The bastard child of NBC. Give me some MSNBC. They are not live.
	They're not live?
	No.
	They're dead.
	They didn't even try.
	No.
	Let's see what we got.
	We got NBC. We could watch the campaign headquarters through Fox, which is, well, we just saw.
	It's pretty sad.
	Joe Rogan has his podcast going on.
	Yeah, I know.
	ABC. My dad's laughing at it.
	Oh, no.
	He mean business?
	My dad loves that because he's from Detroit.
	My mom wants Hopper to give a concession speech.
	Hopper's not feeling it right now.
	He's eating frosty paws.
	It's true.
	He had a good run, though.
	Let's be honest.
	Hopper had a good run.
	He went farther than we all expected.
	I don't want to say he gave Jill Stein a run for money, but I think it was close to some states in an alternate parallel universe.
	Someone's saying show the Trump scheme.
	Here's one thing that I do love about tonight.
	Everything Obama did is going to be undone.
	This is true.
	Everything Obama did is just like, this is a strong repudiation of...
	Obama.
	That is the most fun thing.
	For Trump, for all his flaws, it does have to be somewhat accountable.
	I'm just happy I get to save up for the AR-15 I really want now.
	I'm just going to stash away.
	There's no hurry.
	There's no hurry.
	I'm just going to save up.
	Oh, actually, you're going to see ammo get cheap.
	You're going to see everything get cheap.
	All those people that stocked up.
	Oh, crap.
	You're going to see Donald Trump giving it out at the St.
	Patrick's break.
	Have some TS. There you go.
	Have some NATO static.
	I have family members who work at gun stores like Gander Mountain stuff, and they've just been pouring in the last few days.
	Just people just waiting for the apocalypse.
	You're going to hear a rat piss on cotton in those stores tomorrow.
	What were you saying, Gerald?
	Daryl Issa is actually losing in California right now.
	Really?
	Yeah.
	Oops.
	Well, do you want to go to the Trump stream?
	Do we have the Trump stream?
	We can.
	It's probably, you know, you can...
	I'm just waiting on one more call and we'll call it, folks.
	One more call.
	Arizona looks like it's going to tip any time, too.
	I mean, it's just...
	I already have Arizona listed.
	I have Trump at 269 right now.
	Yeah, CNN hasn't called it.
	I don't think anybody else has called it yet.
	Of course, CNN hasn't called Utah yet, which is just, you know...
	There are twice as many people watching the Trump watch party compared to Hillary.
	So Trump...
	They're trying to say...
	Trump is tied...
	Trump is tied in PA. I'm sorry, I'm still trying to figure it out.
	Has anyone ever told you, Ralph says, has anyone ever told you that you look like a young, better looking Tom Hanks?
	I've gotten worse looking Tom Hanks, so thank you.
	Someone said, not gay Jared, I'm a Browns fan.
	This is pretty accurate.
	Yep, yep, right there.
	Right there.
	I'll check back in in 2020 for that too.
	Just leave the shirt unbuttoned, you fool.
	Hey, quick question.
	Will you guys ship internationally for Mug Club?
	Oh, look at this.
	I know we can ship to Canada.
	I don't know about...
	What is that?
	UK. Who is that?
	I don't know.
	Why am I looking down an ear canal, Jared?
	I thought it was Caitlyn Jenner for a moment.
	It looks like the new Nintendo release party.
	It does.
	It's-a me!
	Mario!
	Oh, gosh.
	Going all Evil Clevel on us there.
	Well, I think didn't he tell Alex Jones one of his first things was going to be to release the 9-11 commission report, so hopefully he doesn't go down with that.
	Hopefully he doesn't lead with that.
	Well, a couple of those gurus who have always been right about elections, I know a couple of them were calling Trump early on.
	A couple of them weren't.
	A couple of them weren't.
	That's one for them.
	One more.
	Man, look at all these guys.
	Nevada, Hillary.
	Well, I called that.
	So that brings Hillary to 215.
	I knew Nevada was Hillary.
	I think Minnesota is Hillary.
	Minnesota is definitely Hillary.
	Yeah, Minnesota is Hillary.
	So 255 to 269.
	Do we know anything about Maine yet?
	Maine, nothing's really...
	72% is in.
	Clinton's in the lead by 3%.
	There's also, you know, Maine, they split the delegates in Maine.
	I don't know.
	Well, I have a map in front of me, because I'm going on projections because I'm tired now.
	I have a map in front of me that if he wins the split delegates from Maine, he wins, because I have them at 269.
	So I have them at 269 without New Hampshire, Pennsylvania, Michigan, or anything from Maine.
	So that's what I have.
	So if he wins anything else tonight, he wins.
	Because I've got my map entirely filled in.
	Now, if she wins Michigan, Pennsylvania, New Hampshire...
	So let's say she wins Michigan, Pennsylvania, New Hampshire...
	She's still at 265.
	There could be a split, too, or neither one of them.
	They just called Nevada for Clinton.
	Yeah, and I just...
	What show?
	He doesn't even watch the show.
	I think he had a stroke.
	I don't know if we can call this, because you know what?
	There is a potential.
	Fox News, I'm saying it officially called that.
	There is no potential for a tie.
	There is a potential for a tie.
	Oh, with New Hampshire if it splits?
	Not New Hampshire, sorry, Maine.
	Here's my point.
	Right now, we don't have Michigan.
	So, if Hillary wins Michigan and Pennsylvania, that puts her at 265.
	Sorry, and New Hampshire, that puts her at 265.
	If she wins Maine...
	That puts her at 269 and him at 269 if she wins all of Maine.
	Jeez.
	If Maine is split, it's 268-269.
	Oh, let it end!
	Did you take Alaska and Hawaii into consideration?
	Yeah, I did.
	I have all this filled in.
	All 52 have been counted, just making sure.
	Thank you, Twittersphere.
	I'm glad that you guys are with me.
	Can I broadcast here like this?
	I feel like this is how they do, like, chank half the time.
	It's like, ugh.
	We'll fix it in post.
	Bring me solo.
	We'll fix it in post.
	How do you fix that?
	I don't know.
	There's still magic in the world.
	They've got a George Soros budget.
	They'll figure it out.
	I think I have some tweets coming out.
	I don't know if there's some results or what.
	Nevada Hillary.
	Okay, we get that.
	Oh, no.
	All right.
	Even if it's tied, it's Trump.
	I mean, who do you think?
	How funny would it be if they turned out that there were some dead voters on the roll calls and Freddie Gray voted Trump?
	Ah, jeez.
	Wow!
	Or Mike Brown.
	Hands up!
	Podotrums ever!
	Ouch.
	I don't even care.
	I feel emboldened.
	It's the bully mentality.
	It's already taking it.
	I feel emboldened against Black Lives Matter.
	I don't know why Jared is still drinking beer.
	By the way, you put two beers in the freezer, Gerald.
	That's how they exploded.
	Gerald.
	I was told by Crowder to put them in the freezer.
	No, it wasn't.
	At some point, that reaches a limit, Gerald.
	Well, I understand that now.
	At some point.
	It's alcohol.
	I figured the point was a little longer.
	It's beer!
	Especially with this Michigan beer at 7.5%.
	It's cans.
	Even at 7% doesn't take long to freeze.
	There's only one beer left.
	How long does it take for wine to freeze?
	Well, it happens.
	A lot longer than these things, but too hard.
	I froze three $200 bottles.
	Did it ruin the wine?
	And woke up at 3.30 a.m., shot straight up in bed, like, oh my gosh.
	Why would you have put wine in the freezer anyway?
	Well, I had to send it out shipping, and I had to chill it down.
	I didn't have much time, and I forgot.
	I did it at like 4 o'clock to ship by 5.
	Didn't happen.
	I hope it stung, Gerald.
	They were good.
	They were really good.
	No, they were good.
	I'm a small business.
	You want me to lose a grand almost in sales?
	Yes.
	I mean, that's not a grand.
	Yes, that's what I want.
	Thanks.
	I want that to reverberate.
	I appreciate that.
	You remember it.
	I appreciate it.
	And learn your lesson.
	It's the 100 Point Popsicle, and I have a story to tell.
	Thank you very much.
	Simplified wine.
	Good place.
	It doesn't exist anymore.
	It doesn't exist anymore.
	It does exist.
	It's there.
	Oh, simplified wine?
	I mean, it's Bon Vino.
	I know it's confusing, but you guys are looking for wine.
	Well, that's one thing.
	If we do have a special with the wine going on.
	So, louderwithcrowder.com slash mug club, or is it louder shop?
	Louderwithcrowder.com.
	Here, you know what?
	Let me bring up the shop.com to show people right now.
	Proudershop.com.
	There you go.
	Look at you.
	Look, featured the mug club.
	Sorry.
	Right now, we have too much going on with the internet and everything here.
	And look, you got your Crowder the Barbarian shirt.
	You've got your Lotto with Crowder standard.
	You've got your Not Gay shirt.
	You've got your Socialism is for Figs.
	And you've got your Lotto with Crowder decal.
	By the way, these shirts, Gerald, I think, they're actually really nice.
	They're athletic fit shirts.
	People always say I wear tight shirts.
	I wore it in XL, and it's still pretty snug because it's designed to actually be athletic.
	It's not a boxy shirt.
	And it's got that nice kind of...
	Very nice.
	Very comfortable.
	I think it's that tri-blend with cotton poly.
	Mm-hmm.
	It's very good printing, too.
	It doesn't get sticky or thick.
	Yeah, it's good printing.
	It doesn't stick to you with sweat.
	Again, you know, Brandon, the guy who did this, we really...
	We didn't want to just slap something on a white t-shirt and sell you guys crap.
	That's why this has taken a long time.
	We didn't just want to do a screen print on a white mug and sell you crap.
	We made sure we...
	We couldn't get a laser etching that was automated.
	This is hand-etched in there.
	This Lauder with Crowder.
	You can feel that friction in there.
	Two-tone, charred rim.
	Very much like something you would get, you know, have around a campfire in the Old West.
	And the t-shirts, you're going to be happy with them if you order some.
	So, great Christmas gifts.
	And, you know, you get access to the daily show.
	I mean, we're going to be...
	You get a lot.
	We're going to be rip-roaring.
	I mean, for students, for $69 for the year, that's $5.80-something a month, to get daily shows from Levin, Stein, myself, Malkin, and this mug, which would cost you $25 in a store.
	The subscription itself is a great Christmas gift, too.
	Yeah, the subscription itself is a great gift.
	Get it and just put it in the promo student and verify the EDU address.
	You can verify with the EDU address with CRTV. For your son or daughter or your brother.
	Get it for your liberal friends.
	Yes!
	And like I said, all the free stuff is still there, so you still get the free show once a week, but if you want it every day, just join and help join in the...
	You!
	You mug club with my brothers!
	Now mug club with me!
	Now mug club with me!
	Oh my gosh, did we just really go to that movie?
	Would you trade all those mugs from this day to that for this one mug that's hand-edged?
	If so, you're a faggot.
	That's a bundle of sticks.
	I love that I'm going to be able to say fag again.
	We'll include that in your Silver Linings video.
	Oh, the Silver Linings video is going to be a rant.
	That made your life easier.
	That's true.
	Just pull that.
	Add some stuff.
	Pull what offends people.
	Yep.
	Oh my gosh.
	We're waiting on...
	We're just sorry.
	We're just waiting on Pennsylvania.
	So let's go to Twitter.
	Let me go to Twitter here and see how people think.
	Let me go to AR-15.
	Gerald, what are you getting at?
	I've got a couple of people tweeting out.
	Amendment 6 passes in Missouri.
	It will now be a photo ID to vote state.
	We'll see if the Supreme Court overthrows that.
	It also looks like Missouri will have a new Republican governor.
	It looks like.
	And he will defeat the Democrat.
	It's good.
	Big deal is getting more governors.
	Right?
	The more Republican governors.
	There's a lot of stuff that goes on at the state level.
	I think there should be more.
	Ah!
	CNN just called New Hampshire for Clinton.
	For Clinton?
	Clinton.
	CNN. Always wrong.
	You two sons of two bitches!
	I don't even know what just was said there.
	That was Fez.
	Dummy.
	Go back to your Transformers 4.
	I'm fully capable of like...
	Why has it got to be four?
	Four's the worst.
	Is there a four?
	I don't even know.
	I thought there were three Transformers.
	I don't know.
	I don't live in your world, Gerald.
	It's a fantastic world.
	Alright.
	Is that official?
	I don't see it anywhere else yet.
	The hamster being called.
	In fact, CNN on this thing has them locked in dead heat still.
	And actually with Hamlet's like 30 votes ahead of her.
	Who said this?
	Someone's lying.
	You're lying, Patrick.
	You just got called out.
	Come at me, bro.
	They're happy about something, though.
	Look at them.
	Oh, what's happening at the Trump rally?
	Trump people yelling.
	Bikers for Trump.
	I wouldn't have put them to the front of the line.
	With their bikes and their loudness.
	Oh my gosh.
	Maybe they are sensing it.
	I wonder what Barack Obama is thinking right now watching this.
	I created this.
	How in the world did I create this?
	This is all my fault.
	This is all my fault.
	I picked a bad day to stop smoking crack with my professors.
	Yeah.
	How much of a loser he is with the white one.
	The white hat?
	Yeah, look at that guy.
	He got it at the gift shop and he hands on the way in.
	This is a knockoff!
	That's because they're from China.
	China.
	He got one on the way in from the guy illegally selling them at the door.
	Oh, gosh.
	A lot of people are saying they're thinking Hillary wins Pennsylvania.
	Yeah.
	I don't know where they're getting that.
	Trump was up 35,000 with like 95, 90-something percent.
	I'm getting this from ARF15.com.
	Getting it from the ARFcom.
	Sorry, I was talking off mic there because I was reading all these damn results.
	Gotcha.
	I was reading all these results.
	Ah, gosh.
	Sorry, I know it's low energy.
	I'm just trying to do the research right now and try and figure out what's going on.
	Crowder, New Hampshire, still open.
	Okay, thank you, Patriotic Harambe.
	I appreciate it.
	Uh...
	Yeah, six minutes ago, Jamie Dupree had Trump 34,000.
	Been watching for almost six hours, says Kevin Magoon.
	Boom.
	I wonder what Trigglypuff is doing right now.
	I tell you what, nothing.
	Trigglypuff dead.
	She dead!
	She didn't make it.
	She didn't make it.
	Oh my gosh.
	Oh, I guess live stream the Yelling Turks meltdown.
	Someone said go back.
	Oh, really?
	Okay.
	Dude, New Hampshire.
	Trump is leading by 15 votes in New Hampshire right now.
	15.
	Nope.
	Nope.
	It's like up to the second stuff.
	What are these guys doing?
	Clinton's up by 99.
	We'll see if we can get the Young Tuckers in there.
	Stream has been really, really crappy.
	Dow Futures down 840 points tonight.
	Don't worry, that'll rebound.
	People just don't like uncertainty.
	It was like Brexit.
	Exactly.
	Best show ever.
	You guys have been awesome.
	Thank you so much.
	OMG, go to the TYT livestream, please.
	We have them here.
	Are they turning it around?
	Do you think it's going to go their way?
	Fucking polite, man.
	No, no.
	You go and say, hey, listen, man.
	Excuse me.
	No, look, you make the case.
	You make the case, man.
	So I know that seems like, oh, well, don't do it.
	You know what?
	First of all, the only guy who had a chance of winning tonight, he probably lost anyway, the guy running against Roy Blunt, right, who said, yeah, I know about guns.
	I served in the military, and here I could assemble one while blindfolded, and I'm going to do background checks.
	And you know what people thought?
	They respected him, because that was strong.
	Don't back down from your positions.
	That's not the right way to do it.
	He's down by six points.
	He's down by six.
	Okay, so I want to just finish my thoughts.
	Sorry, I remember now.
	In fairness, they have been streaming since like early this afternoon.
	They probably pre-taped all of this.
	They just got drunk, thought about dead kittens, taped it as if Trump was winning.
	Just they had possibilities.
	I said you're waiting on someone to die and then hope a Democrat is in office, which by the way happened.
	Right now I'm waiting on you to die.
	Gerald's looking at me like you shouldn't say that.
	I'm joking, Gerald.
	I thought you were saying that to me.
	No, Cenk, because he was saying he was waiting for someone to die.
	When you look at the camera, it's like I'm right behind it, so the confusion is reasonable.
	But they're not going to overturn Buckley v. Vallejo and Bellani.
	He's just terribly, terribly boring.
	That wasn't the meltdown I was looking for at all.
	I wanted it to be epic.
	I know.
	Oh my gosh.
	That said, I'm thoroughly enjoying all the tweets online about...
	Someone just said they were charged twice for the mug club thing.
	This is only one person who said it.
	The person is Portella Gavin.
	So I'm sorry about that.
	Call that customer service number that we listed.
	They will fix it.
	You can't get it more than daily.
	You can't...
	No.
	We did have a...
	Like I said, a lot of people signed up.
	We had a...
	So they're hustling to try and catch up right now, and they've got, I think, 20 customer service reps.
	So sorry about that.
	We weren't expecting as many people right away tonight, and we're very grateful.
	But please do check that.
	If you're trying to join the Mug Club, it didn't work tonight.
	Come back tomorrow, throughout the weekend, throughout the week.
	Yeah, what?
	It is tomorrow.
	What?
	It's tomorrow.
	It's tomorrow.
	It's tonight.
	It's not tonight.
	It's this morning.
	Can we change the verbiage, please?
	Sorry.
	It's offensive.
	Thank you.
	I'm hungry, but I don't want to eat on camera.
	It's not on East Coast or West Coast yet.
	Go get some food.
	That's offensive.
	I'll just insult Jared for half an hour.
	I assume everyone's in East Coast time.
	Oh, man.
	Even Fox News, I think they would call some of the other states if they didn't just know that it would throw them over the 270.
	Still hanging, been watching from the start.
	I'm very happy.
	Oh gosh, my knee hurts, man.
	I had knee surgery and it just hurts when I sit.
	Am I the only man left in this room?
	You are.
	Other than the freezing of the beer thing, I think that...
	Hopper holds his own.
	Hopper's, yeah.
	He did a tasty treat and he's gone now.
	He's down for the count.
	That's all he needed.
	Something to throw him over the edge.
	But we kept the House, too.
	That's good.
	House and Senate both.
	House and Senate?
	Yeah.
	Frank Luntz.
	All of tonight's exit polls were wrong, and I was wrong for citing them.
	Duh.
	Thank you, Captain Obvious.
	Also, I wear a hair hat.
	What shirt do you think Chink is on right now?
	Which number do you think that is?
	Because it looks remarkably fresh compared to his face.
	You've been swapping on the commercial brakes.
	This is just unreal.
	And it's not going to be pretty.
	Okay, so let's talk about it.
	So right now, guys, it's almost a foregone conclusion.
	Yes, there it goes back.
	Have you ever done a show on the road remotely?
	Cell towers cover that?
	No, we will eventually.
	Gosh, what are they looking at?
	What's that?
	Yeah, I was talking about New Hampshire, going back and forth with New Hampshire.
	Gosh, I have 35 new emails.
	I'm not going to do this.
	Don't look at it.
	So we made, I made some bets.
	I made them on the show.
	Uh-oh.
	Uh-oh.
	I thought I made bets with Michael on that South would win Florida and Ohio.
	He did.
	Okay?
	That a 2-1 odds that he'd win Pennsylvania.
	Looks like he's going to win Pennsylvania.
	Okay?
	But we don't know that yet.
	We don't know that yet.
	David and Daniel Ryan brings up a pretty good point on Twitter.
	Why are the young Turks so old?
	Fantastic point, sir.
	You short the market, right?
	And you know why I didn't do it?
	Because I was like, God damn it, I don't want to root for that.
	So it's one thing to have cutesy bets with your friends, right?
	That's what Trump did before the housing crash.
	Yeah, yeah.
	I mean, I don't want to root against America.
	I don't want to root against the world.
	You do root actively against America.
	You were on Al Jazeera, you piece of dirt!
	That was a smart bet.
	I don't want to root against America.
	It's reasonable.
	Clockboy got that full of shell from me.
	Yeah, plummeting across the globe.
	It'll, I'm sure, obviously plummet here.
	Just like Brexit.
	The good news is that the amount of money that those of us who have money in the market are going to lose tomorrow will make back in taxes.
	Yeah.
	Oh, that's funny.
	I do have to play a bit of money in the market.
	Whatever, it'll bounce back.
	It's fine.
	Buy some more tomorrow.
	If anything, I should go buy some more tomorrow.
	Buy low tomorrow.
	Go buy some stock.
	Watch it rise back up.
	The peso is also crashing just a little bit right now.
	Sorry, guys.
	Sorry about that.
	Sorry, Mexico.
	Did you think we're really going to have to build the wall?
	It means business!
	Nobody say!
	It means business!
	You better do anything!
	He's coming for you!
	He's coming for you!
	It's an equal opportunity offensive.
	Oh my gosh.
	I love it.
	Hey!
	What is that bad hombre?
	Do you think he meant me?
	Even all of us, don't you?
	You better run for your life!
	No one is there!
	No one is there!
	It's not like you're crying a little bit.
	Oh, my gosh.
	Think about this, though.
	I look back into America.
	I see my brother and sister there.
	Going to the bathroom like a tiny and everyone has questions.
	What?
	Another silver lining, no matter who you, if you're anti-Trump, pro-Trump, what you were.
	Mike Pence versus Tim Kaine.
	There's no competition there.
	That's not going to be the deal.
	Well, I'm just saying, if anything were to happen, you had to have one of those guys in office.
	Yeah.
	Lord, help us if Tim Kaine was there.
	Yeah, I agree.
	I think Tim Kaine's testicles just retracted back up to his body cavity.
	They only peeked out after primaries, like, is it safe?
	Oh, and went back.
	World War III with him and Russia just looks like...
	No, World War III with him in Russia just looks like, okay, so do I bend over to this table?
	Yeah.
	Gosh.
	So you said there'll be some burning.
	Oh my gosh.
	All right.
	I'll tell you what.
	If it doesn't happen by 1 o'clock, we're just going to leave and call it.
	And if we're wrong, we're wrong.
	I don't care.
	We're going to leave and call it.
	I'm not.
	People are going to be quoting us.
	Oh, they called it!
	It's going to reach the media.
	Who called it?
	You called it?
	We should call it for, like, Evan.
	Just to screw with me.
	PA's at 93%, Trump leads by 26,000.
	No, PA's way over that now.
	They're over 96%?
	Oh, you said 96%.
	Got it.
	People on AR-15 love to know anything.
	Jeez.
	Too crazy, man.
	Too crazy.
	Joe crazy But where am I going to go to San Manor Go to Colorado Calmate We don't want White Castle We made that decision once, and it was not a good decision at 2 a.m.
	or whatever it was when we went to White Castle.
	Gosh, can you believe New Hampshire's within a thousand votes right now?
	New Hampshire?
	I can't believe it's taken this long to hand count New Hampshire votes.
	Where's that from?
	New Hampshire?
	Hey, Dr.
	Marvin, you don't want to keep Martha's Vineyard all to yourself, do you?
	What about Bob?
	New Hampshire!
	I called it!
	There we go, thanks!
	Trying to keep Martha's Vineyard all to yourself?
	Give me, give me, Dr.
	Marvin.
	I need, I need, I need.
	I'm doing the work.
	I'm not a slacker.
	Don't worry.
	See him crying after the Cubs win.
	Go Cubs.
	Congrats.
	It's been over a century since you won a championship.
	Fantastic.
	Let's play the game.
	Let's play the game.
	Where did Jill Stein...
	Break 2%.
	She broke 2% in Florida.
	I would still say, like, Oregon or Washington.
	Florida.
	It's Florida.
	Florida?
	It's got to be Florida, right?
	Uh, no.
	I would say Oregon or Washington.
	You'd be right with Oregon.
	Was I? You know why?
	Because of all that spirit cooking.
	2.3%.
	2.3%.
	The Salem.
	There's a Salem, Oregon, but is it a bad one, Oregon, or is it Massachusetts?
	No, it's Massachusetts.
	Definitely the witch trials were in Massachusetts.
	Well, I know they weren't, but there is a Salem, Oregon.
	Yeah, not the same one.
	There's Eugene, Oregon as well, which just happens to be my middle name.
	I know.
	Just saying.
	Eugene!
	Shut up!
	It's a city in Oregon!
	How married are you to that event on that Thursday?
	You're a funny man.
	We'll figure it out.
	You can't have a fill-in?
	We'll figure it out.
	Fix me on the event talk.
	Oh, man.
	Now it's time to bring up the funnest tweets.
	Patton Oswalt.
	Hey, Donald Trump, good luck with your PTSD after Hillary stomps your dick in the dirt on November 8th.
	Max Barron, 97% reporting 34,000 in PA on Google Maps.
	Not Google Maps, Google Maps.
	They have directions to PA, they're 97% accurate.
	My brother.
	I just got this text from my brother, Jared.
	I don't know if you can blur it, my brother.
	California assholes passed Prop 63 requiring the background checks to buy ammunition.
	Dot, dot, dot, dot, dot.
	Fuck!
	That's what Jordan texts!
	Exclamation marks!
	Hey, it doesn't go into effect yet.
	It is not in effect, right?
	Have you ever seen my brother get mad when he actually gets mad?
	Yes.
	Like, he's the guy, he's like, he's the most, he's the least manic guy.
	When he gets mad, it's like, oh, he's had enough.
	Yeah.
	Just cut a wide spot.
	Done with it.
	Oh, it's the night.
	All of Hillary's promises are going to crap right now.
	Yeah.
	Every American gets a cupcake.
	That'll never happen.
	That'll never happen.
	Never happen.
	Oh, my gosh.
	I'm used to criticism.
	I've been taking it for a very long time.
	Yes.
	All these things you think it's used because it wasn't...
	Take it how America gives it to you.
	That's your replies.
	It sounds like the Joker.
	It does.
	The laughing pad.
	It does.
	We got punched off the bell, though.
	What difference at this point does it make?
	I'm getting a little bit of grief for the Eugene thing now.
	It just means my initials are GEM. G-E-M. Just go with it.
	I shouldn't have revealed that.
	I like to think, and I know that I don't believe this because, as a Christian, I believe when you die, you die.
	But I'd like to think that Ambassador Stevens is up in heaven right now Looking at Hillary through his scope.
	Just going.
	Alright.
	I'll take it.
	I'll take it.
	I think he's, you know, if he's a believer, then he's got bigger fish to fry.
	He's not worried about any of this.
	He's a believer, he doesn't remember any of it.
	But I'm hoping that some of the...
	That's not necessarily true.
	I'm hoping there's just some...
	I would just get some satisfaction if there, you know...
	Maybe if God walks over, says hey...
	If the Benghazi victims could just look...
	Like, if God just said, like, listen, I'm going to lift the shutter for a little bit.
	Like, no!
	No way.
	What?
	What?
	Jesus is like, shh, shh.
	I was supposed to do that.
	Yeah.
	It was a special deal.
	One time.
	He goes, hey, you really want to see something crazy?
	Do you really want to see something crazy?
	And then Chris Stevens is like, I don't know.
	Can you show it?
	And Jesus is like, all right, hold on.
	I'm going to give you a glimpse into the future.
	Ready?
	There's a portal, and it's just Hillary in hell.
	What?
	Oh, you're blowing my mind, Lord!
	I know, I know, I know.
	I just wanted you to see this.
	Stop it.
	I'm saying, I'm honoring them.
	I'm kidding.
	The Benghazi situation, so many people, hopefully there's some sense of vindication.
	You know, all the people who were killed, who were raped, who she...
	Well, she's been above the law for so long, hopefully a lot of people right now, it's not over yet, but hopefully a lot of people are having some kind of satisfaction, like finally, At least she's not going to get the one thing that she really did want, and that's to be president.
	There are a lot of people that have been screwed over by Hillary Clinton.
	Bills screwed more over, I guess, technically.
	Bills screwed over everyone but Hillary Clinton.
	Apparently.
	I realize my poor choice of words.
	But I do.
	I think they feel some sort of vindication right now.
	Like, hey, good.
	Finally.
	It's like in the movie when the guy that keeps getting out of the situations that he should get caught for and you don't like, he finally gets his and you're like, ha-ha, good.
	And you know what?
	Here's something...
	Google Maps has Trump up in Michigan by 38,000 with 80% reporting.
	Here's something, you know, I talked about this, Republicans don't have to win all blacks or Latinos.
	They just have to, that theory kind of held up tonight.
	If you look at the numbers from what we see thus far, you just don't have to lose them that badly.
	You either have to win them or just put Hillary Clinton there, who none of them want to vote for.
	Yeah.
	But, I mean, she still won way more blacks and Latinos than Donald Trump.
	You just need to get 30%, 35%.
	You know, that's what you need.
	And if you could improve, take this, and you could just, you know, anyone other than Donald Trump would do better with women or improve your score with, you know, the educated white voter like Mitt Romney did.
	This idea that the country was gone.
	You know what I mean?
	That if it wasn't Trump, it means it could never happen again.
	This shows you that even if Trump, let's say, doesn't win, or even if Trump didn't win, it shows you that there certainly is a chance there's always the pendulum swinging the other way.
	So, you know, we've tried to have a message of hope, really, throughout this entire election cycle.
	Even when I got mad and my patience was tested with Donald Trump.
	Shots once Trump wins.
	Doesn't ask for a specific address.
	People are saying it doesn't ask for their specific address for the mug club.
	Um...
	Hmm.
	Alright, hold on a second. hold on a second.
	them.
	This is the quiet of the storm.
	The eye of the storm.
	Alright.
	So, nothing.
	No results here, right, Gerald?
	We're still waiting.
	Still waiting.
	96% reporting in PA. Trump's lead keeps getting bigger.
	Big thing I'm hearing.
	that's it.
	Okay.
	Uh...
	Oh, for people asking, ladderscott.com slash mugclub.
	You'll only be asked for your address for them to ship it after you subscribe.
	So when you subscribe, then they ask for your address and they ship the mug.
	Again, this is...
	It's very...
	It's going to take a little while because these are actually going out hand-etched and we...
	We ordered a good amount, but we need to order more.
	So just be patient with us.
	The show launches in January.
	You will have your mug by then in hand, and you will start being billed, and it will ask for your address once you subscribe.
	So I promise you there have been some errors, I know, tonight because of the server crashes, which is great, but no one is going to pay for a mug and not get it.
	No one will be double billed.
	We just had a lot of glitches tonight because of what a crazy election night it's been, and how many of you have been signing up?
	So the support is very much appreciated.
	Very much appreciated.
	Very much appreciated indeed.
	Let's see here.
	Gosh, New Hampshire is just not on it.
	I'm looking at it still.
	There's not that many people to count.
	Come on.
	I don't think there's really any path for her to win at this point.
	Yeah, it's widening a little bit Michigan.
	you Thank you.
	Trump's pulling ahead a percentage in Pennsylvania.
	And still pretty much tied up in New Hampshire.
	I don't understand.
	I really don't.
	Somebody made the regrettable joke of, they're slow as molasses in New Hampshire counting those votes.
	They kind of are, actually, though.
	They really are.
	Come on.
	Count the votes, New Hampshire.
	Let's go.
	You're holding us up!
	New Hampshire.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, I know.
	I feel bad like the energy is going down here, but I just don't know what to talk about after five hours of this election.
	I think we're in hour six almost.
	It's almost one.
	It's about five minutes.
	So technically, that'd be hour seven, I guess.
	Gosh.
	All right.
	So what do we want to do?
	We should.
	You should, now that you're back on, elaborate a little bit more on Prepare with CR because we ran the commercial.
	People kind of saw it.
	Oh, yeah, we did.
	So we're going to have some more sponsors here with the show.
	So preparewithcr.com is one of our sponsors.
	PrepareWithCR.com where you go.
	It's $99 for an emergency food kit shipped free.
	$99, 30 days, 140 servings.
	It's PrepareWithCR.com.
	Now you know why.
	CRTV, PrepareWithCR.com in case you didn't connect the dots.
	PrepareWithCR.com.
	And listen, we're not doomsday theorists.
	We've talked about this.
	We're not saying that because...
	Well, certainly not because Trump won, but even if Hillary won, it wouldn't be some kind of doomsday apocalypse.
	But if there's a natural disaster, I had the ice storm, my brother had the earthquakes there in Los Angeles.
	It just pays to have some stuff.
	It's in a nice sealed container you've got for 30 days.
	Food, there you go, for $9 shipped.
	You're not going to find a better price anywhere if you're lazy like me and you don't want to buy a bunch of canned goods and you don't want to go out and you can pickle things and do it.
	And that's good too, but...
	You just have it in case of an emergency.
	So preparewithcr.com.
	They help support the show, too.
	And it's worth it for you.
	If you just, like me, set it, forget it, and I have it downstairs with some water.
	And, you know, we went nine days.
	We had my dad calling nine days with the Montreal ice storm without any access to anything.
	No running water, no heat, no electricity.
	And we were fortunate enough to get a place at a hotel because someone else had a connection.
	So preparewithcr.com.
	That is it.
	That is the sponsor.
	No one's calling anything?
	No.
	Nobody.
	Over 98% reporting in PA now, so they're getting closer.
	I think New Hampshire went to sleep.
	They have labor laws, so they'll finish counting.
	They didn't figure it was that big a deal, so they'll finish counting.
	Actually, they're not going to finish counting?
	No, they are.
	I don't know.
	I wouldn't put it past the union belt.
	Yeah, that's crazy.
	Now, what happens if Donald Trump goes in and supports Right to Work in, I don't know if Pennsylvania or places like that are, because Michigan went Right to Work.
	What happens with those Rust Belt union workers?
	That's...
	It's called it too late.
	Well, first of all, he doesn't have to do anything with that because that's a state issue.
	So states will probably just take the lead on that.
	He'll probably support that as president, of course, but...
	I'm betting if you're a union guy, you're starting to figure out that the guys you've been supporting for a long time don't have your back.
	They start talking about good stuff and they get to you these contracts that sound too good to be true.
	Guess what they are?
	Nobody can afford to pay them when they come due and that's why you get renegotiations.
	So don't get pissed when you've got some sweetheart deal just to get your butt back on the job and then it just happens to be that nobody on the planet can pay that kind of rate.
	See all the companies going out of business because of that.
	Right.
	So, take a reasonable deal.
	Go to the right to work state and you'll have a good salary.
	We have Uppercut at UppercutPi filling us in.
	They are using Common Core Math in New Hampshire.
	They are.
	That's the hang of it.
	It's so confusing.
	There's letters involved and very few numbers, in fact.
	Thank you, UppercutPi underscore pi for the tip.
	Yeah, it's weird.
	Yeah.
	There's nothing else to talk about.
	There really isn't.
	I don't feel like we could just call this thing.
	It's my brother's birthday yesterday.
	Happy birthday, Andrew.
	Andrew.
	Happy birthday, Andrew.
	Andrew.
	15 years old.
	He was actually in one of our videos.
	He was.
	He was in the gun video.
	Yep, he was.
	AR-15 with Roger Goodman.
	He was the unfortunate buddy.
	By the way, we may have some really cool giveaways for people who are in the mug club.
	We did an AR-15 giveaway last year.
	We're not doing any giveaways to anyone who's not in the mug club anymore.
	So that way it's a smaller drawing pool and we can have better...
	We did an AR-15, which is pretty good, but we can do some stuff similar and actually bigger, more expensive giveaways for people who are in the mug club.
	So...
	If you join and support it, man, we can do a lot of really cool stuff, and we're looking forward to...
	Oh, Decision Desk is projecting...
	Look at Courtney.
	Courtney said she was going to leave because she had to get up early.
	She's still up!
	She didn't go to bed.
	Well, she's on the West Coast.
	Courtney, go to bed.
	Yeah, but she has to get up early because we're driving tomorrow, and I can't manage the site.
	Ah, she's fine.
	Courtney, go to bed, sweetheart, and send Twitter pictures of you.
	Arizona and Pennsylvania?
	That would be...
	She said Arizona and Pennsylvania.
	She said Arizona and Pennsylvania.
	Yeah.
	Arizona.
	Oh, and Pennsylvania?
	Yeah.
	They're calling it, basically.
	Decision desk.
	But that's...
	Again, that's not...
	I don't know whether I trust them or not, but...
	I mean, I'm not really hoping they're right.
	I really hope so.
	If they're calling Pennsylvania, what do you have on Pennsylvania?
	Percentage in?
	I am reading 96% in.
	And how much is he leading?
	Almost a solid percentage point.
	That's 96% in?
	I mean, that's still close.
	Yeah, but the districts look...
	Does it look like more rural districts coming in?
	Yeah, Pittsburgh is already called.
	Erie has not been called yet, but that'll be very Trump.
	Let's see, there's one...
	Would you say Erie is probably one of the most Trump...
	It is, but it's not a huge population, I believe.
	No, it's pretty small.
	No, what I'm saying is that's one of the places missing.
	It's definitely in his favor.
	There are a few missing that are leading Hillary, but there's two missing that are leading Trump.
	Well, Decision Desk just called it for Pennsylvania.
	Courtney said, please drive safely.
	Why?
	Because you want Gerald's face to be in good condition for you, Courtney?
	Stop it.
	Stop it right now.
	Gerald and Courtney sit in the tree.
	Gosh.
	Gerald and Courtney sit in the tree.
	You better have children soon or your window will close.
	Wow.
	Wow.
	It's the nursery rhyme my dad used to sing.
	What?
	What kind of nursery rhyme is that?
	Well, I mean, think about it.
	Nursery rhymes were awful.
	They were incredibly violent.
	Massachusetts legalizes recreational pot.
	There we go.
	No one cares.
	Massachusetts is a crap one.
	They're not even aware it's happening because they're all just celebrating.
	They started way early.
	With the pot.
	So, this isn't just protecting Trump and PA, Colorado minimum wage hike.
	So, yeah, listen, if Trump wins...
	If he wins Pennsylvania or Michigan.
	What's the Michigan vote?
	What's the Michigan vote?
	Michigan vote is...
	We got 77% in.
	Trump is up by...
	A good solid percentage.
	1%?
	Yeah, a little over 1%.
	Well, the likelihood of him winning either Michigan or Pennsylvania seems very high.
	Do you think Hillary challenges this?
	Because the margins are pretty slim?
	In some places?
	Do I think the what?
	Do you think she challenges...
	Back to that question.
	Will you accept the results of the election?
	And I don't think if it were the other way, I don't think Trump would have accepted it.
	No, I'm not saying that that would have been a bad thing for him to, you know, kind of look for something.
	I think that we're at the point.
	It's 1 o'clock.
	I think people are tired.
	I think we can effectively call this.
	Yeah.
	Well, you know what?
	Hillary doesn't seem to be getting the results very fast.
	She's just now notified she lost Michigan.
	Really?
	Yeah.
	What do we have?
	We have Hillary lost Michigan.
	Let's get her.
	We just had to get this.
	We're shoehorning this in a way here.
	Come back to me.
	I'm actually...
	Apparently not shoehorning fast, but...
	Alright, well let me tweet this out.
	Google has PA up by 49,000 for Trump with 98% reporting.
	Come on.
	Come on, 2%.
	2%. 2%.
	All right, here.
	We're going to call this very soon.
	I'm amazed at any...
	Honestly, I'm amazed that anyone is still with us.
	We very much appreciate it.
	This late in the night.
	We're just trying to do this.
	At this point, it's just about...
	It's just about trying to get you these results.
	So I feel pretty confident that we can call it at this point.
	If he wins Pennsylvania or Michigan or New Hampshire, it's a done deal.
	Were you looking for something, Jared?
	I'm looking, but it won't come back to me.
	I think I'm just going to tweet out myself that he won one of those states and then tell you, hey, somebody just tweeted out that he won so we can go to bed.
	It's done.
	It's been called.
	It's been called.
	I know.
	This is the tedious part.
	Well, it was going to go down like this if he was going to win tonight.
	It wasn't going to happen quickly.
	There's a bunch of stuff.
	Like I said, either she wins in a landslide or he wins very closely.
	All these people predicting over 300 electoral votes easily for her.
	Brilliant people.
	Very smart.
	He's up by a percentage point in Pennsylvania.
	Alright.
	Jared, do you have anything else as far as video elements?
	If you want to call it, we do.
	Do we want to call it?
	What do you think?
	Do you think we feel comfortable calling it, Gerald?
	Yeah.
	Did we get the video of Michigan?
	That's if she wins.
	Is that why you're thinking?
	Yeah, maybe I'll have it.
	Come on!
	Some of these are pre-tapes.
	Oh, that one, dude.
	Think about all the hot sauce.
	We'll tweet it out later.
	Just for fun.
	Just so people see.
	Let's just show it.
	I don't have it.
	It's not on here.
	Oh, you didn't do your job.
	Yeah.
	Um...
	Alright, so do we feel comfortable calling this?
	Everyone?
	A lot of people are saying thanks for staying up so late.
	Alright, thanks for staying up.
	Thanks for staying up with us.
	A lot of people have been tweeting us.
	Hold on, let me say goodbye.
	So listen, let me clear my eyes out so I don't look like Chank.
	Listen, we really do appreciate it.
	We're incredibly grateful.
	So the daily thing is a new journey.
	We're going to have a whole new studio.
	This week there is no show on Thursday.
	You are going to see us through Thanksgiving, maybe Christmas, in a new studio with gift wrapping over it.
	So we're going to have it all gift wrapped so you won't be able to see the new studios.
	We build it out with lighting and make some new hires.
	And coming January we're going to be doing the show every single day.
	And you'll still get, like I said, free content every single day on YouTube.
	Because if we're doing an hour show every day...
	You're still going to be getting clips on YouTube.
	You're going to be getting more and more free content.
	And I'm incredibly grateful for this.
	You know, this has been a rough election.
	I've been back and forth.
	Like you said, I've always tried to criticize Trump because I hate groupthink.
	But I don't know.
	I'm actually...
	I feel pretty good about this result right now.
	I didn't know how I was going to feel going in, honestly.
	I think all of us feel pretty good about it.
	I'm not thrilled as far as, like, I'm not super excited.
	It's not like when I voted Stephen Harper in Canada just because that was such a big change.
	I remember I was really excited.
	But I'm happy.
	I think we're all pretty happy with this result right now.
	I'm exhausted.
	We have to drive across the country.
	But lotterworthcreditor.com slash mug club.
	You get me, Stein, Levin, Michelle Malkin, daily programs for $99 or $69 if you're a student.
	And it is an absolute game changer.
	You get this mug and you get Jared's show.
	I'm telling you, you know, think of this tonight.
	Just tonight, before this, the experts called it.
	They said there was no way.
	There was no chance.
	Trump's a racist.
	He's a xenophobic.
	No way this guy gets anywhere near the White House.
	These conservatives are done.
	Think of all the message boards, all the Twitter posts that you could see people We're good to go.
	That includes people who voted for Barack Obama, who decided to jump ship.
	That includes working class voters.
	That includes more people of a diverse coalition than before.
	That includes people rejecting the vision that Barack Obama had for America.
	They thought they had us beaten.
	They thought they had us down.
	And we even had comments coming on the YouTube channel talking about that.
	But they have just been knocking at the gates of hell.
	They have been asking and wishing for a fight with the devil.
	It started tonight.
	And when Crowder goes daily and we're alongside Stein, Levin, Malkin, I'm not just saying...
	You know me.
	I don't believe in bragging or making grandiose statements.
	There has never been a team like this assembled with this kind of firepower before.
	And we knew that it was our time.
	We knew that there is a turning point in the United States, whether Trump won or lost.
	Let's get outside of the politics and look at culture and media.
	And the left has been asking for this.
	They've been prodding.
	Well...
	We will give back to you tenfold when your love is truly giving.
	See you next week.
	Celebrate good times.
	Come on.
	Okay?
	Frankly, thank you so much to everyone who voted for me.
	I am so proud to be your president.
	Okay?
	We are going to make America great again.
	Okay?
	And everybody else who voted for Hillary, I'm hoping that we could all unify together.
	And, of course, you could kiss my orange ass.

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