#783: March 2, 2006 (Live)
Today, Dan and Jordan do the show live at the X-Ray Arcade in Milwaukee, where it is time to celebrate Texas Independence Day, Alex Jones style.
March 6, 2023 - Knowledge Fight
01:13:21
Participants
| 
| Speaker | Time | Text |
|---|---|---|
| It's Thursday, March 2nd. | ||
| The second day of March. | ||
| On this Thursday, March 2nd. | ||
| March 2nd. | ||
| It's already March 2nd. | ||
| The Ides of March. | ||
| That's when they killed Julius Caesar. | ||
| At the middle of March. | ||
| Where are the Ides of March? | ||
| It's already Thursday, March 2nd. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Knowledge fight Dan and Jordan, I'm sweating Knowledge fight That rock is gonna break I have great respect for knowledge fight Knowledge fight I'm sick of them posing as if they're the good guys Saying we are the bad guys Knowledge fight Dan and Jordan Knowledge fight We need money Ambient damage | |
| Andy and Janzas Stop it Andy and Janzas Andy and Janzas It's time to pray Andy and Janzas You're on the air Thanks for holding Hello Alex I love you. | ||
| I love you. | ||
| Everybody! | ||
| Welcome to Knowledge Fight. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm Dan. | |
| I'm Jordan. | ||
| We are a couple of dudes who like to sit on a stage. | ||
| Worship at the altar of Selene and talk a little bit about Alex Jones! | ||
| Oh, indeed we are, Dan. | ||
| Jordan? | ||
| Dan! | ||
| Jordan! | ||
| Quick question for you, buddy! | ||
| What's up? | ||
| What's your bright spot today? | ||
| My bright spot today, Jordan, is we are here at the famous X-Ray Arcade. | ||
| Um... | ||
| Just a fantastic venue. | ||
| Lovely crowd here in front of us. | ||
| We got DJ Danarchy on the ones and twos. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Give it up, man! | |
| Marty DeRosa telling some jokes! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Marty DeRosa! | |
| I mean, it's bright as hell. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| Yeah, I know. | ||
| I think this is probably as good as it gets. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Let's get out of here. | ||
| Yeah, no shit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Bye! | |
| What about you? | ||
| What's your bright spot? | ||
| Because I stole the big audience popping one. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| I suppose my bright spot is tomorrow I'm going to go to Target with you. | ||
| I'm not coming. | ||
| You're not coming? | ||
| No, you're going to Target by yourself. | ||
| I've got to think of a new bright spot then. | ||
| All right. | ||
| For the sake of argument, I'll come with you to Target tomorrow. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| All right. | ||
| Well, then I'm going to get a pair of swim trunks. | ||
| Yeah, that's true. | ||
| Yeah, and then we're going to get into a hot tub. | ||
| Well, that's... | ||
| I mean, come on, man. | ||
| And then we're going to find another globalist. | ||
| Well, look... | ||
|
unidentified
|
And then we will be three globalists in a hot tub. | |
| If I know anything, if the two of us get in a hot tub, a third will just show up. | ||
| Yeah, that's true. | ||
| Probably Soros. | ||
| I don't think we rate Soros yet. | ||
| Anybody tracking his plane? | ||
| We've gotten bigger, but we're not Soros level yet. | ||
| I don't know, I feel like we could probably get a nod from Soros. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| Maybe not a check, maybe not attention, but like a polite Midwest nod. | ||
| I want a nod from a billionaire. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fuck off. | |
| Fuck you! | ||
| So your whole bright spot is going to Target with me and getting a swimsuit tomorrow? | ||
| No, obviously my bright spot is these motherfuckers out here! | ||
| What do you want from me? | ||
| What do you want from me? | ||
| Nothing is... | ||
| Everything is anticlimactic to that. | ||
| Like, oh, the drive was good. | ||
| Yeah, the drive was nice. | ||
| The drive was good. | ||
| It was only an hour. | ||
| We made it quick. | ||
| It was good times. | ||
| Such good times. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, yeah, yeah. | |
| You were all over the road. | ||
| Like Speed Racer. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yep, yep. | |
| So... | ||
| Do we do a show? | ||
| This is surreal. | ||
| I don't know why there are so many people here who are... | ||
| Who are fully aware that a large part of this show is going to be watching me read something from a Word doc. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I guess it takes all kinds. | |
| But Jordan, we have an episode to go over today. | ||
| Oh, do we? | ||
| Yeah, we do. | ||
| Yeah? | ||
|
unidentified
|
What's it about? | |
| Well, I mean, I think there's always a little bit of a tension. | ||
| If you're doing a live show, it's really difficult. | ||
| You want to do a normal show because people are coming because they like the show. | ||
| Well, I mean, we're going to release it as a podcast anyway. | ||
| So these people, I mean, you guys are important, but you're like 150 people or whatever. | ||
| Damn, man. | ||
| That's important. | ||
| So much for you guys being his bright spot. | ||
| You guys are nothing compared to downloads. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Harsh. | |
| But just doing a normal episode doesn't feel kind of right if we're doing a live show. | ||
| It feels like there needs to be something special about it. | ||
| I was poking around trying to find famous people from Milwaukee. | ||
| Are there any? | ||
| Well, that's not fair. | ||
| You have Dahmer, right? | ||
| I'm not doing that one. | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| That's not fun for a live show. | ||
| There was William Rehnquist, Supreme Court Justice William Rehnquist. | ||
| We were considering covering the episode where he died, the day after he died. | ||
| But that seemed a little dark. | ||
| That's a little bit on the nose. | ||
| Kato Kaelin? | ||
| I think Milwaukee gets to claim 50% of Mike Myers. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Okay. | |
| Like Canada gets the rest? | ||
| Yeah, exactly. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, yeah, yeah. | |
| Okay. | ||
| Because he did the Milwaukee. | ||
| I mean, if you even have that in your movie, then yeah. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| That's about as good as it gets. | ||
| All right. | ||
| That was an easy negotiation. | ||
| You all get half of Mike Myers. | ||
| You all get half of Mike Myers. | ||
| Unfortunately, it's the love guru. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's... | |
| Ooh. | ||
| Oof. | ||
| Oh, man. | ||
| The pentavirate! | ||
| I was trying to find something to do. | ||
| Something that would be fun. | ||
| And today is March 2nd. | ||
| And you know what that day is, right? | ||
| 3-2? | ||
| Yes, it is. | ||
| 23. It is also Texas Independence Day. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No! | |
| It's a palindrome and an Independence Day today? | ||
| The greatest holiday for a Texan. | ||
| And as our show is about the world's greatest Texan, I thought, well, hell, let's go and see what he was doing on a... | ||
| On a Texas Independence Day. | ||
| I assume he is still in the White House known as the Texans. | ||
| Sure, Biden calls him that. | ||
| Yeah, well, I mean, it's grandfathered in. | ||
| Yeah, it's printed all over the place. | ||
| There's pictures of him. | ||
| It's already on the stationery. | ||
| Yeah, you can't do anything about it. | ||
| Yeah, and so, I mean, we recently talked about Texas Independence Day on the show. | ||
| I mean, it recently came up on the podcast, and so I was really inspired by the history that I learned of it at UT, and so I decided to really pull out all the... | ||
| Okay. | ||
| And we have with us here tonight the last living member of the 1896 law school... | ||
| We don't have that. | ||
| I was gonna try and get a fake cannon. | ||
| I'm so sorry. | ||
| I was gonna try and support you in that bit, but I'm sorry. | ||
| I just couldn't. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| I understand. | ||
| I wouldn't have either. | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| That's good. | ||
| So today, we're gonna be going over March 2nd, 2006. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| Interesting. | ||
| Time in Alex's life, certainly. | ||
| 2006. | ||
| I had just dropped out of college for the first time. | ||
| Hey, congratulations. | ||
| One of four. | ||
| What? | ||
| We've been doing this podcast for many years, and we've been friends. | ||
| But I didn't know it was four. | ||
| I've dropped out of five colleges. | ||
| I mean, technically. | ||
| Basically, according to some people, I have a master's degree, but according to more important people, I have no degree. | ||
| Yeah, that's a feat. | ||
| So we're going to be going over this episode, but before we do, we should say hello to some wonks. | ||
| Oh, that's a great idea! | ||
| So as a little special thing, people have filled out wonk names. | ||
| We did a thing. | ||
| You know what I'm realizing right now? | ||
| What's that? | ||
| Is it a bad idea? | ||
| I don't have the wonk sound effect. | ||
| So I think people will have to say, you're a policy wonk. | ||
| I think that's got to happen. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, I think that's... | ||
| How many people can do the entire technocrat drop? | ||
| We're not going to mess up. | ||
| Wait, which one? | ||
| How many people can do all of the technocrat drop? | ||
| So first, Paige, just Paige, you're now a policy wonk. | ||
| Thank you very much! | ||
| Next. | ||
| KG at home. | ||
| You are now a policy wonk. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Thank you very much! | |
| I'm guessing that's somebody who could not make it. | ||
| They're one of the important people who will be listening later. | ||
| Ooh. | ||
| This one's blank. | ||
| Thank you very much! | ||
| Maxwell of the Poor Historian's Podcast. | ||
| You are now a policy wonk. | ||
| All right, that's enough of that. | ||
| I should have brought the sound effect. | ||
| It was a 50-50 proposition at best. | ||
| Yeah, in hindsight. | ||
| So, I'm going to spoil this right out of the gate. | ||
| The Texas Independent State doesn't even come up once. | ||
| It's kind of a theme of these live shows. | ||
| I don't find what I'm looking for. | ||
| In this case, we do not hear anything about Texas Independence Day or the wonderful law school students from 1896. | ||
| But we do have some big news. | ||
| And so we'll start the episode here with this. | ||
| Welcome, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
| Thursday, the second day of March 2006. | ||
| We're going to be live here for the next three hours. | ||
| We're going to have wide open phones on any news topic, any issue, any item. | ||
| You disagree with me, you agree with me, you have a question, a comment, 1-800-2599-231. | ||
| Ron Paul will be showing up sometime in the third hour. | ||
| He is scheduled today. | ||
| Yeah, no Texas Independence Day, but I heard that and I thought, Ron Paul, fuck yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You know who likes that guy? | |
| Crowds of... | ||
| Young, non-insane people. | ||
| I am just now realizing that as what amounts to the audience surrogate, I am no longer necessary. | ||
| Once you guys are doing the aww in the middle of the clip, what do I do? | ||
| What do I do? | ||
| Someone help me! | ||
| We'll get to that shortly, I assume. | ||
| But yeah, so how do you feel about the prospect of talking about Ron Paul in front of a bunch of people? | ||
| Okay, in 2006, what was Ron Paul most recently known for being racist against? | ||
| That is a great question. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I mean, it could be. | ||
| I mean, he could run the gamut, really. | ||
| True. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I mean, he hadn't run for president in 08 and 12 yet. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So you haven't had that. | ||
| So he's still kind of... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Is he a House member now in 2006? | |
| Still? | ||
| Well, see, here's the thing. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Because he was... | ||
| Well, now you're unnecessary to the show. | ||
| Touché. | ||
| He was for a long time, and then he wasn't for a while, and then he got in the house again. | ||
| He got in the house again? | ||
| I think he is back in 2006. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Okay. | |
| Is he back now? | ||
| In spirit. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| He's not there, but he is definitely... | ||
| His presence is back. | ||
| He's represented. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And, I mean, we are our ancestors, so... | ||
| Rand Paul is Ron Paul. | ||
| Yeah, that's true. | ||
| That is true. | ||
| But now he's switched over to the Senate, right? | ||
| I wonder what the next one's going to do. | ||
| Now, I was listening to this episode and I thought, hey, Ron Paul coming up, pretty exciting. | ||
| But I got caught off guard by a lot of commercials in this episode that I found upsetting. | ||
| So here is one of the commercials that Alex was playing in 2006. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Don't love me anymore. | |
| You used to take such good care of me. | ||
| Is that my car talking to me? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes. | |
| You neglect me. | ||
| Change my oil late most of the time. | ||
| Use the cheapest gas. | ||
| I'm getting sick. | ||
| One of these days, I'm just going to give up. | ||
| Wait a minute. | ||
| I've got three more years of payments on you. | ||
|
unidentified
|
If you want me to last forever, you need to add protective engine treatment, protective transmission treatment, and especially protective complete fuel system treatment. | |
| Protecta's unique synthetic fortifiers treat the metal and the oil to reduce friction like no other. | ||
| Okay, I'll add some Protecta, but you'll have to perform. | ||
|
unidentified
|
How about faster acceleration? | |
| More horsepower. | ||
| Longer lasting. | ||
| I'll always be there for you. | ||
| So if you want more, treat it right with Protecta by SFR. | ||
| Okay, so... | ||
| Dan! | ||
|
unidentified
|
As your Ford Focus, if you do not take care of me, I will fucking kill myself! | |
| That's my ad! | ||
| I kind of prefer that ad to be, hey, do you want to fuck your car? | ||
| Do you want it to feel better when you fuck your car? | ||
| Are you experiencing a weird, abusive relationship with your car? | ||
| And the other part, too, of it that's really bizarre is that there's some sort of an interpersonal relationship going on, but he has three more years of payment. | ||
| Sure, sure, sure. | ||
| He has bought this personified car he's fucking. | ||
| See, now there's a whole host of questions that arises once you're there. | ||
| You bet. | ||
| Like, is indentured servitude okay if it's a car? | ||
| These are the questions that transhumanism and robots are. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh my god, Knight Rider! | |
| Knight Rider! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Whoa! | |
| Knight Rider! | ||
| Keep saying it! | ||
| I'm just concerned. | ||
| Like, is this the conversation we didn't hear on Night Ride? | ||
| You think that's Kit? | ||
| I think that's Kit! | ||
| Might have been Kit. | ||
| So, there's a lot of characters in 2006 who were there. | ||
| There's a number of characters who aren't there. | ||
| But as we know from monitoring Alex Jones over the years, Paul Joseph Watson is a pretty consistent presence on the show. | ||
| That's fair. | ||
| I mean, it was a little mild of a boo. | ||
| Alright, I like that. | ||
| So here, whoever yelled, fuck him. | ||
| What you don't know is that in 2006, Paul Joseph Watson was on fire. | ||
| He was doing such a good job. | ||
| So I don't forget and not cover this. | ||
| Let's just do it right now. | ||
| Two articles by Paul Watson, who is a man on fire. | ||
| Paul is working, I can report to you, 18 hours a day without being pushed and prodded because he knows the time is short. | ||
| He knows the enemy is coming. | ||
| He understands how serious things are, and he is now working as hard as I am, and I commend him. | ||
| Steve's working pretty hard as well in between being a rock star in London and beating the women off with a stick. | ||
| You ought to witness it when I was over there with him. | ||
| He's putting in about eight hours a day. | ||
| He needs to get on fire. | ||
| I'm just teasing you, Steve. | ||
| I'm just teasing you, Steve. | ||
| I love Steve. | ||
| He's a great guy. | ||
| Great guy. | ||
| Great guy! | ||
| Alex seems fun to work for. | ||
| Okay, I don't understand how it is that he can be proud of a guy who is obviously not working 18 hours a day. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh. | |
| And then shit on the guy who's traveled to work. | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| But you know what? | ||
| It is fun. | ||
| It is fun to have these brothers, Paul Joseph Watson and Steve Watson, both work for Alex, and him go on air and be like, Paul's doing such a great job. | ||
| That dude is so on fire. | ||
| Steve sucks. | ||
| He'd be good if he wasn't out trying to get laid all the time. | ||
| Is this like a Japanese management technique where it's like you play the brothers against each other? | ||
| I have to assume he thinks they would never hear this, but it's on a radio show. | ||
| It seems like personal shit. | ||
| I mean, that just means he knows they don't listen to a show. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Or he really doesn't like Steve. | ||
| That's fair. | ||
| So, Paul Joseph Watson has these articles. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| He's working on them all real hard. | ||
| This is so exciting. | ||
| I just gotta commend Paul Joseph Watson right now because he's on fire. | ||
| Let me just read this little article he wrote about the Simpsons situation. | ||
| What is... | ||
| The Simpsons situation. | ||
| In 2006. | ||
| Can you guess what The Simpsons situation is? | ||
| Homer Simpson wore a dress. | ||
| That's interesting. | ||
| No, would you like to make another guess? | ||
| Okay. | ||
| Lisa Simpson was like, maybe people should have healthcare. | ||
| Ooh, that sounds like her. | ||
| Yeah, that does sound like that. | ||
| I feel like that's reasonable for in-character stuff. | ||
| Yeah, single payer. | ||
| Sacks break. | ||
| When did they kill Mr. Burns? | ||
|
unidentified
|
That was in the 90s, right? | |
| That was like 95. So that's not this. | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| Also, Mr. Burns is still alive. | ||
| What? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| This is news. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yep. | |
| So here is what the Simpsons situation is. | ||
| Okay, what's the Simpsons situation? | ||
| It's mildly disappointing. | ||
| Why Americans know more about the Simpsons than the Constitution and why it is a benchmark of how much danger we are in. | ||
| Most Americans can name Simpson's characters than they can the freedoms that the First Amendment upholds. | ||
| Again, more Americans can name Simpson characters than they can the freedoms that the First Amendment upholds. | ||
| This is a benchmark of how much danger the country is in and the blame can be laid with public education. | ||
| Damn. | ||
| Damn. | ||
| Okay, so if I understand correctly... | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| People can name too many Simpsons characters in comparison to the number of freedoms we have. | ||
| Well, there's five protections of the First Amendment. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Sure. | |
| And there's five primary family members of the Simpsons. | ||
| That's a good point. | ||
| So you can't just throw around Smithers and Hans Moleman and shit. | ||
| All right, all right. | ||
| What about Moe? | ||
| Wait, nobody out there help him. | ||
| Don't you dare ask me this. | ||
| I'm sure you can name all five family members. | ||
| I'm sure you can. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Homer, Marge, Lisa. | |
| You're so fancy. | ||
| Homer, Marge, Lisa, Bart, and Maggie. | ||
| That's correct. | ||
| Life, liberty, the pursuit of happiness. | ||
| What do you want from me? | ||
| The First Amendment. | ||
| Do you know all five of them? | ||
| Freedom of speech, freedom of the press, freedom of religion, freedom to congregate, and freedom to masturbate. | ||
| All five! | ||
| All five, baby! | ||
| No, the fifth one is you have the right to petition the government for a redress of grievances. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, yeah, yeah. | |
| The one everyone remembers because it makes so much sense. | ||
| It doesn't feel like it fits in with the others, and so obviously people would mistake them or mess up that one. | ||
| But also, the Simpsons are characters. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I think that if you had fun cartoons that were slightly offensive and really funny for 20 years, and the characters in it were the Amendment's freedoms, people would be able to name them! | ||
| What kind of proof of concept would you have? | ||
| Like some sort of cartoon that is beloved across generations about how bills become law? | ||
| There's no way that exists! | ||
| So this also was a poll that was carried out by the McCormick Tribune Freedom Museum, which is actually in Chicago. | ||
| I'm sorry. | ||
| We should go visit it. | ||
| I'm sorry. | ||
| Are they like an accredited poll? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Nope. | |
| What's their bias? | ||
| Are they like Rasmussen? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Nope. | |
| Like what kind of five points republic? | ||
| They're a freedom museum. | ||
| That's what they are. | ||
| And it was basically like this whole article was just a clickbait press release type of thing because the Freedom Museum was opening in April 2006. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So this was just getting the word out about the McCormick Tribune Freedom Museum. | ||
| And then they closed after three years because no one gave a shit. | ||
| They should have opened the Simpsons Museum. | ||
| Clearly. | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| The Simpsons Museum is still going strong. | ||
| Wait, what? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| There's like 40 of them. | ||
| It's an evergreen concept. | ||
| It's basically in most people's homes. | ||
| There's so many towns named Springfield. | ||
| You can put it anywhere. | ||
| All right. | ||
| I don't fault silence there because that was not anything that meant anything. | ||
| It was just a sentence. | ||
| No, the silence is my fault is how this works. | ||
| That's how this relationship works. | ||
| So, Alex gets to talking about how much these freedoms are, no one knows about them, and it's public education's fault, and this launches him down an entire rabbit hole about how the globalists are intentionally making sure that no one gets a good education. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| School is making you dumb. | ||
| Right. | ||
| I just have one thing to question, is like, if you have freedoms, shouldn't you not know what they are? | ||
| By very virtue of you being free to do them. | ||
| That's interesting. | ||
| So you're saying that... | ||
| You can only know the boundaries of your freedoms. | ||
| You cannot know your actual freedom. | ||
| You can only really know that it exists once it's been breached. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| Right. | ||
| So shouldn't you not know your freedoms if you were free? | ||
| Maybe. | ||
| And you're really smart because you didn't have those... | ||
| Graduation? | ||
| A degree? | ||
| School didn't have a chance to make you dumb. | ||
|
unidentified
|
laughter laughter laughter So anyway, Alex talks a little bit about this. | |
| Similarly, the Rockefeller Education Board, which funded the creation of numerous public schools, issued a statement which read in part, and in my first film, America by Design, I go show a model UN brainwashing session at UT with high school juniors and seniors. | ||
| And I've been researching at the UT Library and had read quotes by the Rockefeller Brothers Foundation saying this, and guess what? | ||
| I went and pulled the actual report by the Rockefeller Brothers Foundation and actually read it from their own report. | ||
| When I read this 10 years ago, I did not believe it. | ||
| And back in the day, you couldn't find this stuff on the web. | ||
| I spent... | ||
| Every week I was down there for hours at UT. | ||
| And every time I read a quote somewhere, saw it in a newsletter, I said, that's not true. | ||
| And I'd go down, and every time. | ||
| Patriots have been so honest, especially back in the day. | ||
| I mean, it was just all true. | ||
| No matter how horrible it sounded, no matter how horrible it was, it was true. | ||
| See, that's my experience, too. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| Back when they were like, aha, the shape of your forehead means you're evil. | ||
| They knew what they were doing back then. | ||
| The Patriots back then were so honest. | ||
| Everything was so correct and true. | ||
| Absolutely. | ||
| That's why they edited their Bibles. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So Alex pretends that he's reading a Rockefeller document here that he's gone to libraries and found. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| So let's enjoy a little bit of that. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| Are you beginning to realize how bone-chilling this is? | ||
| Let me read to you from the Rockefeller Foundation, Rockefeller Brothers' report. | ||
| Quote, it continues, Similarly, the Rockefeller Education Board, which funded the creation of numerous public schools, issued a statement which read in part, So he's not actually reading a Rockefeller document? | ||
| I was about to say, that doesn't sound right. | ||
| Yeah, no, he's reading off like a conspiracy blog. | ||
| That's what he's doing. | ||
| That cites, or I should say miscites a Rockefeller adjacent document. | ||
| I just read Moby Dick, and now to quote a book report by somebody who didn't read Moby Dick. | ||
| Gotcha. | ||
| So he talks a bit more about this here. | ||
| He goes on and he has a passage from this Rockefeller document. | ||
| Continues. | ||
| Similarly, the Rockefeller Education Board, which funded the creation of numerous public schools, issued a statement which read in part. | ||
| Now hold on to your hats, and I have read this from the report. | ||
| In our dreams, people yield themselves with perfect docility to our molding hands. | ||
| The present educational conventions, intellectual and character education, fade from our minds, and unhammered by tradition, we work our own good will upon a grateful and responsive folk. | ||
| We shall not try to make these people or any of their children into philosophers or men of learning or men of science. | ||
| What? | ||
| And it goes on. | ||
| We have not to raise up from among us authors, educators, poets, or men of letters. | ||
| We shall not search for the embryo of great artists, painters, musicians, nor lawyers, doctors, preachers, politicians, statements of whom we have ample supply. | ||
| The task we set before ourselves is very simple. | ||
| We will organize children and teach them to do in a perfect way the things their fathers and mothers are doing in an imperfect way. | ||
| And then David Rockefeller, in another speech he gave, paraphrased this and said, the public schools are helpless people yielding themselves to our molding hands. | ||
| Our molding hands. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He just gave like a fucking four paragraph quote. | |
| And then his paraphrase is like, hey, public schools need help. | ||
| Yep. | ||
| That also, that last part, not true. | ||
| Not real. | ||
| He was paraphrasing the thing that he had just said. | ||
| So that wasn't written by any Rockefeller, nor was it from a Rockefeller Brothers Foundation paper. | ||
| It's a quote that's found in a paper called The Country School of Tomorrow, written by Frederick T. Gates in 1913. | ||
| Gates was the chair of the General Election Board, which John D. Rockefeller did donate to generously, but passing this off as a statement by the Rockefellers is kind of dishonest. | ||
| It's also a completely butchered quote with pieces removed in order to give it a completely different context than its original meaning. | ||
| Yeah, I mean, the problem is that it didn't make sense at all. | ||
| Like, I understand giving it a different context, but you removed anything that would make it mean anything in words. | ||
| Yeah, I feel like that's what happens, you know? | ||
| Things make less sense when you take pieces out of them. | ||
| When you remove meaning from words, they can mean whatever you want. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Alex and all conspiracy theorists present this quote as proof that the schools are designed to dumb people down, but they leave out one important point, which connects to the larger context, and that is, this is about country schools in 1913. | ||
|
unidentified
|
laughter laughter laughter laughter The problem that the text is... | |
| When the marm enters the room. | ||
| The problem that the text is presenting is that the education that takes place in rural schools is disconnected from the concerns and real life experiences of the children in those schools. | ||
| Observers visited schools and found some where everyone, quote, "teacher and pupils alike were suffering from hookworm disease" and even estimated that as many as 40 to 60% of the children had disabilities that would be easily preventable with the correct You should learn about hookworm, then. | ||
| Stop with the schooling! | ||
| Tweak the schooling a little. | ||
| Start with hookworm and then move forward. | ||
| Simultaneously, quote, the farm demonstrators of the General Election Board, of which there are several hundred in the South, complete with a series of pictures of rural life in the more neglected sections of worn-out soil, inefficient cultivation, scanty crop, abandoned field overgrown with bushes, deeply washed and gullied hillside, rotten orchard, sprawling fence, tumble-down house with unkempt and littered surroundings. | ||
| They liked lists back then. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, that was a hell of a sentence. | |
| This paper proposes that the state of affairs was not good for the state of agriculture, nor for the people living in those communities, and the educational system as it existed wasn't helping anyone. | ||
| Thus, you have the passage where Gates says the stuff about, like, we will not try to make these people or any of their children into philosophers or men of learning or science. | ||
| It's not about creating a school to make people dumb. | ||
| Instead, quote, Right. | ||
| This sentence is literally always cut out of the quote when it's posted on conspiracy sites. | ||
| With respect to these high things, all that we shall try to do is just to create presently about these country homes an atmosphere and condition such that if by chance a child of genius should spring up from the soil, that genius will surely bud and not be blighted. | ||
|
unidentified
|
*laughs* | |
| So it's not about making people dumb. | ||
| It's about, like, give everyone a chance. | ||
| So this was written in 1913, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Yeah, they were so bored they had to write like this. | ||
| Like, they couldn't just be like, okay, we're going to teach them practical shit. | ||
| You heard that list. | ||
| Do you think that was like a first draft? | ||
| No, no, no, no, no. | ||
| See, but that's the thing. | ||
| I can take out this part about the fence. | ||
| See, in the things that I didn't get a degree in, I learned that writing at that time, lists were really, really important, and you only added on to them. | ||
| I don't know if you've ever read a book by Salinger. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That seems to be like, that was a time when you got paid by the letter, too, right? | ||
| You did. | ||
| You did get paid by the letter. | ||
| You're not wrong. | ||
| And L. Ron Hubbard made a religion out of that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, yeah. | |
| Good on him. | ||
| It worked. | ||
| Yeah, it did. | ||
| Can't argue with the results. | ||
| So anyway, Alex is lying about this stuff. | ||
| He's just trying to bullshit about schools. | ||
| And I think, essentially, the connective tissue is he's complaining about schools and how they make you dumb because more people know the Simpsons characters than... | ||
| Was that the connection? | ||
| We're still on The Simpsons? | ||
| That's where it sprawled from, yes. | ||
| Alright, so because children in 1913 learned practical things, and now we know Simpsons characters, no one will become a philosopher ever again. | ||
| Here's a fun game. | ||
| What's the most obscure Simpsons character you can name? | ||
| This is impossible for me to judge, by the way. | ||
| I never watch much Simpsons. | ||
| You can just make up a name. | ||
| I don't even know what obscure means. | ||
| You should have gone to college. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, shit. | |
| To be fair, much like Sideshow Bob, you walked into that rake. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Absolutely. | |
| Happily. | ||
| Yeah, I don't know. | ||
| Sideshow Bob. | ||
| Who fucking cares? | ||
| Nailed it. | ||
| I mean, with Simpsons characters, it's like, we've been together too long. | ||
| That's true. | ||
| I know it too well. | ||
| It's like a brother that I don't want to see except for on holidays. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| So I think maybe after that lying about public schools, maybe we should cleanse our palate and hear another weird commercial. | ||
| Here's another thing that Alex is hawking back in 2006. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Months now, you've been hearing about the incredible health benefits of Zango, the functional health beverage made from the whole fruit of mangosteen. | |
| What you probably didn't know is that Zango joined forces with the leading manufacturer and distributor of functional health beverages like Capri Sun, Sobe, Mystic, and Red Bull to create the fastest growing business opportunity in America today. | ||
| Are you sick of barely having enough money? | ||
| Are you tired of working so hard yet feeling like you'll never get ahead? | ||
| Are you ready to start investing in your own business instead of somebody else's? | ||
| Whatever it is you seek, Zangle could be that special company that helps you achieve your hopes and dreams. | ||
| So take matters into your own hands. | ||
| Create a future that doesn't depend on a fickle 401k and lateral promotion. | ||
| Yeah, I was confused by the commercial. | ||
| Business doom! | ||
| Yeah, I thought I was getting juice at first, and then it's a pyramid scheme. | ||
| What's going on? | ||
| Alright, we started with Mangosteen, and then there was a conspiracy of people working together to destroy us. | ||
|
unidentified
|
How did we get to 401ks? | |
| What's the journey there? | ||
| Hey, are you tired of aspiring to have a 401k? | ||
| That's what I thought. | ||
| Join my MLM. | ||
| All of your problems will be solved with Mangosteen? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So this was a company called Zango, starting with an X. And there's a couple of fun things about this company. | ||
| The first is that they, at this point, were making completely unsubstantiated health claims. | ||
| And they would go on to get a cease and desist warning letter from the FDA about this just a few months later in September 2006. | ||
| The list of claims they were making is actually pretty impressive. | ||
| They were trying to pull this off. | ||
| They claim that their mangosteen drink could do everything from working as an antidepressant to preventing gum disease. | ||
| It would lower your fever and also prevent cancer. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Sure. | |
| It's honestly a little over the top, even in the realm of products that are sold on InfoWars. | ||
| Their corporate structure is a huge mess, too. | ||
| A couple years after this point in 2006, they would completely implode, with lawsuits from investors making allegations of corporate looting, where the founders just were, like, siphoning off funds, like a pyramid scheme. | ||
| They claimed it could do everything. | ||
| What did you think? | ||
| Yeah, I'm not gonna try and... | ||
| If there's money, I'm going to get it for me. | ||
| I'm not going to leave it there in the company. | ||
| You don't understand the go-away part of this transaction where I am going to go away. | ||
| It's dangerous for that money to be sitting there because this business could implode at any moment. | ||
| Listen, you've got so many health problems, I can see that I need to keep this money away from you. | ||
| You'll get it sick! | ||
| Yeah, so Alex is trying to get his audience into a Mangosteen MLM. | ||
| A lot of really helpful ads is what I'm saying on this episode. | ||
| Again, I was looking for... | ||
| Multi-level mangosteen. | ||
| Texas Independence Day. | ||
| This is Texas Independence Day. | ||
| I got weird commercials, mostly. | ||
| I'm confused. | ||
| What did Texas declare independence from, exactly? | ||
| From your shit. | ||
| Another rake! | ||
|
unidentified
|
LAUGHTER LAUGHTER LAUGHTER LAUGHTER Oh, boy. | |
| I'm even annoyed with myself. | ||
| I like that you've come out of your shell and become more annoying than me. | ||
| What was it? | ||
| Was it Mexico? | ||
| Spain? | ||
|
unidentified
|
France? | |
| It has to have been Mexico, right? | ||
| Sure. | ||
| Because they stole it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's got to be it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
We would know if Alex talked about it, but he didn't. | |
| It would be a little bit different if they called it We Own Your Shit Day. | ||
| That would change the context. | ||
| It's potato, potato. | ||
| Yeah, fair. | ||
| So there's some secret documents that Alex is going to be reporting on. | ||
| And this is exciting and then gets really dark. | ||
| A former dissident who was imprisoned in Soviet gulags for a total of 12 years has warned that he personally saw secret documents in 92 which outlined a conspiracy to turn the European Union into a socialist dictatorship. | ||
| Well, look what they're trying to do right now. | ||
| In a speech in Brussels, 63-year-old Vladimir Bovatsky described the contents of the still-classified Poltaburro and Central Committee documents. | ||
| Sorry, what? | ||
| Yeah, it's kind of worrying that Alex doesn't know the word Politburo. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Did he say... | ||
| Polta Bureau. | ||
| Yep. | ||
| Yes, you did. | ||
| He seems confused. | ||
| First off, I want to eat a Polta Bureau. | ||
| Right now, I just got hungry. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And I don't know what it is. | |
| I mean, look. | ||
| There's a lot of words I don't know. | ||
| Plenty of them. | ||
| I mean, but even if you've never heard... | ||
| Okay, so it's a word that... | ||
| Politburo is a word that even if you've never heard someone say before, you still won't go Polteburo. | ||
| You can if you're cold reading. | ||
| You cannot do that. | ||
| Yeah, if you're just like... | ||
| All right. | ||
| Fair. | ||
| But also Alex claims to be like the world's foremost expert on communism. | ||
| And a great cold reader. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, yeah. | |
| Also, this guy's name is Vladimir Bukovsky, not Blavatsky. | ||
| We all know who Blavatsky belongs to. | ||
| Well, that's the Theosavist folks. | ||
| Oh. | ||
| Now I'm confused. | ||
| But see, Blavatsky and Bukovsky is an easy mistake to make when you're cold reading, but if you're someone like Alex who claims to be an expert on the evils of the Soviet Union, you should know who this dude is. | ||
| He was a major dissident voice in a big part of the anti-Soviet Union community throughout the years. | ||
| He claimed that he was shown these documents in 1992 when he was an expert witness against the Soviet Union. | ||
| This has never been corroborated and is almost certainly made up. | ||
| It's particularly damning that he's coming out with these allegations now, at this point in time, considering two years prior he'd written a pamphlet titled EUSSR and he didn't include this juicy tidbit then. | ||
| Oh, that's unfortunate. | ||
| Kind of seems like it would have helped his argument at that point. | ||
| Yeah, it's always trouble whenever four years after an event happened you're like, I totally saw it coming. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Also... | |
| In 2015, Bukowski was arrested in the UK for possession of child exploitation material. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Well, come on! | |
| What story doesn't end there? | ||
| Yep, yep, yep. | ||
| I told you, not great, dark. | ||
| He had been gathering stuff between 1999 and 2014, and he, quote, said, in essence, he didn't see what harm he was doing. | ||
| This guy sucks. | ||
| Yep. | ||
| Yep. | ||
| He died before he was able to stand trial. | ||
| So it's sort of a small victory. | ||
| I mean, you know. | ||
| So let's move along from that. | ||
| Because now that I've said it, I almost feel like I shouldn't have. | ||
| So let's get back to commerce. | ||
| In the past... | ||
| I feel like in front of a crowd, my transition game might not be as strong. | ||
| You know, it may make you feel, for some reason, like all of these years where I've said, that's a great transition. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Alone. | |
| Alone in my room. | ||
| My transitions are glowing. | ||
| It's great. | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| So anyway, back in the past, Alex always used to have his water filter sponsor on pretty much every day. | ||
| And Texas Independence Day is no exception. | ||
| Got some new specials and new Berkeys out. | ||
| Tell us about those different units and what they do and why folks need them. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Well, we have the new Travel Berkey, which I think is really, really a good product because it's a smaller Berkey than the big Berkey. | |
| It only holds a gallon and a half. | ||
| It's made out of stainless steel. | ||
| It's available everywhere except Iowa, and you can hold two black Berkey purification elements in it. | ||
| That always struck me as weird, because I've heard her say that a lot. | ||
| It's everywhere but Iowa. | ||
| What is it about Iowa that makes this particular Berkey? | ||
| Unacceptable. | ||
| Well, it's actually all Berkey's. | ||
| All Berkey's are... | ||
| Why? | ||
| What? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| In Iowa, no Berkey's. | ||
| Iowa is staunchly anti-Berkey. | ||
| Did they? | ||
| Okay, okay. | ||
| Let me throw this out to you. | ||
| Let me throw this out. | ||
| Berkey has a warrant. | ||
| Listen, I know a lot about Iowa, and I know what they outlaw. | ||
| Are you sure they didn't misunderstand how to spell Berka? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh. | |
| I'm not positive. | ||
| But I can tell you what the situation is for the water filter. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| So, Iowa is the only state in the United States that does not allow third-party testing of claims made about water filter efficacy. | ||
| That's actually great, right? | ||
| Isn't that good? | ||
| I mean, for other states. | ||
| No, on the other side. | ||
| Wait, third party meaning neutral? | ||
| No. | ||
| They can hire somebody to do it. | ||
| So it's good for Iowa to not allow that shit? | ||
| No. | ||
| They allow you to put a water filter on the market if you just buy somebody to do the testing for you. | ||
| Whereas every other state requires an independent certification. | ||
| Oh, okay. | ||
| Oh, well then, yeah. | ||
| What? | ||
|
unidentified
|
What the fuck is wrong with Iowa? | |
| Wait, no. | ||
| I feel like you might be misunderstanding. | ||
| Iowa has a higher standard. | ||
| I don't understand! | ||
| Okay. | ||
| So pretty much every other brand of water filter has this certification. | ||
| That's the NSF ANSI certification. | ||
| And it is the mark of quality. | ||
| So if you're in the market, and any other... | ||
| In every... | ||
| Wait, hold on. | ||
| I was confused. | ||
| Wait, now I'm... | ||
| Yeah, now we're going back and forth. | ||
| I was taking it out on you, and I was the one who was wrong. | ||
| See, that's what I thought. | ||
| But then, now I don't even know. | ||
| I don't either. | ||
| I can't trust you. | ||
| Should we put it to a crowd vote? | ||
| Am I wrong? | ||
| That didn't work. | ||
| Look, here's the bottom line. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Berkey water filters do not have this independent certification, and therefore they're not allowed to be sold in Iowa. | ||
| They can sell them in every other state. | ||
| They can't sell them in Iowa. | ||
| That's the bottom line. | ||
| We've established the thing that we knew five minutes before this whole thing started. | ||
| You bet. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| In 2002, the New York Times Wirecutter did an analysis of Berkey filtration systems, and they found that they were very effective at removing lead from water, and that was a strong indication that they would do the same with other heavy metals. | ||
| That's great. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| However, they removed way less chloroform than Berkey claimed they did, which calls into question how good the filters are at removing organic material in the water. | ||
| Or if they had other intentions for the installers of these water filters. | ||
| I don't think the testing for the New York Times was a prank. | ||
| Okay, well that's fair. | ||
| So their test for the New York Times showed a 13% drop in chloroform after filtration compared to a 99.8% decrease that's advertised by Berkey. | ||
| What did they do? | ||
| So the Times compared their findings with other available results from lab tests with Berkey's and found that the numbers were all over the place and none of the tests performed even came close to the rigor that's required for that full certification, which is a cause for concern. | ||
| It's unclear from any available information, but the inconsistency definitely makes a person think that maybe Berkey knows that they could not pass that certification requirement, so they just decide to say, fuck it, we're not going to sell anything in Iowa. | ||
| I appreciate that. | ||
| It's not a terrible plan, honestly. | ||
| Their target customers are all people who hate the government. | ||
| I mean, adjust your expectations accordingly is a fair business strategy. | ||
| Sure, sure. | ||
| You have all these people who are like anti-regulation. | ||
| It's like, oh, this isn't certified. | ||
| Who gives a shit? | ||
| Yeah, I can sell them all kinds of bullshit. | ||
| They don't want to know if it's evil. | ||
| How many people are going to be buying their water filters in Iowa anyway? | ||
| Two? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I know nothing about the water filter market. | ||
| They're also too big for most countertops. | ||
| They're supposed to be countertop water filters. | ||
| They're 19 inches tall and the standard countertop is 18 inches. | ||
| That's pretty fucking tall. | ||
| I don't even want to read some of these because they involve slime build-up and what have you. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Slime build-up? | |
| I have some bad reviews of Berkey water filters that I have decided to go ahead and punt on. | ||
| Yeah, the other day, these turtles suddenly became fucking ninjas. | ||
| The secret of the ooze, it turns out. | ||
| That's what it was about. | ||
| Is the big Berkey. | ||
| You might be on to something. | ||
| So Jordan, we heard earlier in the episode, Alex said that he was going to take some calls. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| It's always nice when we go to the calls and we hear a friend. | ||
| Oh, is Dan from Illinois up here? | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| Old Man House Phone? | ||
| Sorry. | ||
| I need to leave if you're already there! | ||
| I'm sorry to disappoint, it is not Old Man House Phone, but it is a man that you have recently dubbed Louisiana Dentures. | ||
| Oh, Louisiana Dentures is back! | ||
| Alright. | ||
| And I can confirm that his name is Charles. | ||
| Okay. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't want to mention no names, but I got four phone calls this morning, one by a retired policeman. | |
| On another program, they're saying on a defense, uh, uh, Department of Defense, that this month, uh, they're supposed to go into Marshall or some cities, or all the cities, I'm not sure, I didn't get it yet, I'm checking on it, uh, that, uh, they're gonna shut it down. | ||
| George Bush's got a lot of heat on them right now. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And he's got to do something, because they're mad here in Louisiana. | |
| They're really mad. | ||
| They're really upset about this tape out. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They're really all upset. | |
| I've been getting phone calls all morning. | ||
| And another thing, what happened to this $85 million, I think it's $85 million, that George Bush Sr. and Clinton collected for the storm? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Nobody has got nothing. | |
| Sir, the UN's giving almost none of the money they got. | ||
| They're a bunch of crooks. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes, sir. | |
| Well, do you think that it's possible that this month here they will shut the United States down? | ||
| Well, they've been saying for six months they were going in in late March to strike on Iran on Election Day, what is it, the 27th or 28th in Israel? | ||
| Yep. | ||
| Look, I don't know. | ||
| They said they were going to go into Iraq in 2002 of March. | ||
| They went in 2003. | ||
| So I don't know, sir. | ||
| I mean, certainly the preparations have been made. | ||
| I don't think they're far enough along. | ||
| I almost want to give them a round of applause for saying, I don't think they're going to do martial law this month. | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| That takes restraint. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What a very specific level of restraint, though. | |
| Not this month, dude. | ||
| Look, they're not ready. | ||
| Come on. | ||
| Not enough plans. | ||
| What are you talking about? | ||
| What month are we in? | ||
| We're in March. | ||
| You start martial law in June. | ||
| Right! | ||
| June! | ||
| Summer months. | ||
| People want to be inside in the AC anyway. | ||
| It's a summer of rage. | ||
| It's a summer of lockdowns. | ||
| It's a summer of all of these things. | ||
| I do love the way that Charles from Louisiana says, storm. | ||
| I like how he's very noncommittal about some or all cities will be under martial law. | ||
| All cities would be tough. | ||
|
unidentified
|
There is a huge gap between some or all cities. | |
| Some could be two. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Okay, so is Minneapolis shut down, but St. Paul is fine? | ||
| Uh-huh. | ||
| Yeah, St. Paul becomes the globalist base camp to enslave Minneapolis. | ||
| Fuck knows what happens to the Quad Cities. | ||
| Two of them? | ||
| Global Space Camp. | ||
| The other two? | ||
| They have to fight each other to the death. | ||
| It's a game theory thing. | ||
| It's a whole mess. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And you know who's in charge? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Who? | |
| Quad City DJs. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Damn it. | |
| Yes. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Two claps. | ||
| Exactly correct. | ||
| For the Quad City DJs. | ||
| I do appreciate the... | ||
| The enthusiastic clap of somebody who got it, followed by the slower, less committed clap of people who are like, maybe I should have gotten it. | ||
| Or I have been emboldened by the first person clapping. | ||
| Exactly, yes. | ||
| I wasn't going to say anything. | ||
| What a genre of music that was, though. | ||
| Them and like the 69 boys. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What fun. | |
| Oh boy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
69 boys with a Z. So you know it's good. | |
| Yep. | ||
| So, good news, bad news. | ||
| I've got to move quicker so everybody can get on. | ||
| I'm going to take five calls right now, as fast as I can, and I'm going to get back in the news. | ||
| And Ron Paul's floating next hour. | ||
| He's in a meeting with a general right now, with his liberty committee, and they had to move it back. | ||
| But he's set for some time in the next hour, and 90% of the time he joins us on the day he says he will. | ||
| But he's in D.C. right now in some committee meeting with the military. | ||
| So as soon as he comes out of that... | ||
| In the next hour, he's scheduled to join us. | ||
| Yes, Ron Paul's in the wind. | ||
| We might not be getting anything from that old racist after all. | ||
| Listen, I understand that he was a congressperson. | ||
| Yeah, show some respect. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He genuinely had that power. | |
| But there's a hard... | ||
| In my mind, Ron Paul meeting with a general is like... | ||
| What if we killed them all? | ||
| Like, that's all I hear. | ||
| In my head, it's not like, oh, what's a good OPSEC? | ||
| Like, I don't get any of that. | ||
| I hear meeting with a general, and I say, whoopty shit. | ||
| I don't know how often people in the government meet with a general. | ||
| Probably often. | ||
| Does it help or hurt? | ||
| What does a general do at a meeting? | ||
| Tells you the lay of the land. | ||
| Look, I think that it's very funny. | ||
| It's very funny for Alex to say Ron Paul is in a meeting with the military. | ||
| He's in a meeting with the military. | ||
| Because that sounds like what a child says. | ||
| Yes, it does. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm going to meet with the military. | |
| All right. | ||
| I will become king of the military. | ||
| Sure you will, little Alex. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, I think you will. | |
| So anyway, Ron Paul may or may not show up, but in the meantime, we have another commercial. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Do you know the truth about breast cancer? | |
| Did you know that the race for the cure is over? | ||
| The best-kept secret in the country today is that it is now possible to kill cancer without personal suffering, mutilation, and poisoning of your entire system. | ||
| Now, it's cancer's turn to die with BlazeMed Inc.'s patented methodology. | ||
| Without cutting, bleeding, drugs, or damaging radiation, we can destroy tumors of any size without adverse side effects. | ||
| At a physician's office, Star Wars technology at its best. | ||
| For more information, call 702-953-0267. | ||
| That's 702-953-0267. | ||
| Or visit www.lathemedinc.com. | ||
| Something doesn't sound right about this. | ||
|
unidentified
|
This isn't the cancer you're looking for. | |
| Was that technology? | ||
| I guess maybe it was. | ||
| Star Wars technology. | ||
| Based on... | ||
| So I assume that they're going to put you in a bacta tank. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Uh-huh. | |
| Yep. | ||
| Make you drink blue milk. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And then you'll wear the thing and you'll do the, okay, alright. | |
| So, I mean, wow. | ||
| Look, we have not had cancer since 2006. | ||
| I have one problem. | ||
| Just one? | ||
| For a lot of things. | ||
| And that is, if somebody says, we can cure your cancer, and you don't have to do anything, it's just not good. | ||
| We got magic. | ||
| Hey, you walk in, we cure your cancer, you get out. | ||
| Also, Big Macs are free. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Whoa! | |
| That's the sketchiest fucking commercial I've ever heard. | ||
| So that was an ad for LaysMed, Inc., which is a company that pushes a treatment they developed called Lash Therapy. | ||
| It's spelled L-I-E-S-H, and it's all abbreviated, like all capital letters, all dots. | ||
| It stands for light-induced enhanced selective hyperthermia. | ||
| And I'm not sure what that means precisely, but I can tell you that it's fraudulent. | ||
| Okay, so light... | ||
| Read that one more time for me. | ||
| Light-induced enhanced selective hyperthermia. | ||
| Okay, so that means that light induces a selective hyperthermia. | ||
| So it's heat. | ||
| So it means that you are going to feel... | ||
| It's not even heat. | ||
| You're just going to feel a temperature a lot. | ||
| Yeah, and a laser's gonna do it. | ||
| So it could be like, oh man, you're gonna feel the shit out of this 65 degrees. | ||
| It is so temperate in here. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh shit! | |
| Light-induced hyperthermia. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| So they put you in a sunlamp. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They put you in a tanning bed. | |
| Well, not really. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's what it is! | |
| It's a tanning bed! | ||
| You might be too generous. | ||
| That's fair. | ||
| It's a tanning bed that they can't afford to turn the lights on. | ||
| Because a tanning bed, you come out with a tan. | ||
| Yes, that's fair. | ||
| It does something. | ||
| In this one, you come out with cancer. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes. | |
| Still. | ||
| Lay's Med Inc. | ||
| was owned by a woman named Antonella Carpenter, who was found guilty of 29 charges involving defrauding cancer patients who she claimed she could cure, resulting in her getting five years probation and $1.1 million she had to pay in restitution. | ||
| Has anybody ever noticed how, for a lot of these characters, Dan has a habit of putting a comma right before, was found guilty for... | ||
| The founder of said blah-blah-blah, comma, was found guilty for! | ||
| It's a lot easier to tell the tales of these horrible people when we're alone in a room because there's not the very understandable groans and no! | ||
| So she was also successfully sued in civil court with a jury awarding the family of one of her victims $2.5 million. | ||
| Carpenter told these suffering people that her treatment was 100% effective with no side effects, which of course was bullshit. | ||
| What she actually did was inject their tissue with a, quote, mixture of saline solution and dye composed of either ordinary food coloring or walnut hull extract. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Was that a quote from her or from someone else? | |
| From the lawsuit. | ||
| Okay, it wasn't a quote from her. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| Here's what I got for you, baby. | ||
| She would then heat the... | ||
| The tissue with a laser, and then boom, they're cured. | ||
| She would discourage patients from seeing other doctors for examination after their treatment, which that should raise some red flags, I think. | ||
| Okay, okay, so I get it. | ||
| So the dye lights up under the... | ||
| No, because it's injected. | ||
| No, no, no, but you get injected with the dye, right? | ||
| And then you put it under the light, and then you see a thing, and you're like, ooh, I'm healed as fuck. | ||
| Maybe. | ||
| That's got to be it. | ||
| No, because I'm imagining she just has the vials of the liquid and because it has food coloring in it, it looks like it's something other than a saline solution. | ||
| I'm imagining a whole psychodrama where somebody comes in and they're like, I need another hit. | ||
| And she's like, if you don't take this, if you don't give me what I want, and then smashes it on the ground. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No! | |
| So any negative experiences that the patients had after the treatment, like pain or other effects of untreated cancer, were explained away as the body, quote, ridding itself of cancerous tissue in a natural and normal way. | ||
| Such a good... | ||
| 100% effective rate. | ||
| Yep. | ||
| She told these people that the treatment she performed had worked and that they were cancer-free. | ||
| She's awful. | ||
| Carpenter's non-treatment has led to at least one death, that of Cindy Babeca, who sought treatment for breast cancer and continued to get worse as Carpenter took her money and provided fake medical care. | ||
| It's hard to precisely pin down how many other people could have been hurt or killed partially thanks to this fraudulent scheme. | ||
| People who are diagnosed with cancer are often scared, oncologists aren't the types to throw Do you know what I think of immediately? | ||
| Daria. | ||
| Like, that's the type of psychopath this is. | ||
| I bet if you scratched her, she'd be like, isn't it better for these people to believe that they're cured? | ||
| I mean, it's in line with her logic. | ||
| I mean, it really does seem like there's a good psychopath test there. | ||
| Like, John Ronson can go fuck himself with all that other bullshit. | ||
| Just like, is Daria a psychopath? | ||
|
unidentified
|
If you think no, then you're a psychopath. | |
| I look forward to reading your transcript. | ||
| It's gonna be a short book. | ||
| It's gonna be a short book. | ||
| So Alex is taking money to promote this woman to his audience. | ||
| And I think there's only two things that can come from airing a commercial like this. | ||
| One, people with severe cancer get funneled towards Lay's Med Inc. | ||
| People scam a few grand off them while providing fake hope and colored water injections. | ||
| Or two, people with treatable cancers don't go to get appropriate care and choose something like colored water injections, leaving them far more vulnerable to die. | ||
| And Alex is taking money for... | ||
| Why would you run that commercial? | ||
| When I was a hearing aid specialist, I had a woman come in one time who was like, actually, I can't hang out today. | ||
| My daughter and I both have Lyme disease, so we're flying to Florida to see this homeopathic doctor. | ||
| What do you do? | ||
| At that point, I'm theoretically supposed to be an authority in some fashion. | ||
| What do I just... | ||
|
unidentified
|
No! | |
| Like, what do I do? | ||
| Just like, oh, let me explain why homeopathy is stupid. | ||
| Like, what do I, what do you, you just go, sorry. | ||
| So that's a bad commercial. | ||
| It's a bad commercial. | ||
| I think we, I think we've seen a number of, like, profiting off, like, tragedy. | ||
| This is a nightmare so far. | ||
| The best commercial is the guy who wants to fuck his car. | ||
| That was a great one. | ||
| I've warmed up to the Ford Focus trying to kill itself to exploit my love. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| At the beginning, everyone was like, oh, that's so fucked up. | ||
| Now it's like, that's a perfectly normal commercial. | ||
| So great. | ||
| So great. | ||
| So I don't know if Alex is listening to his own show for the first time, but I found this moment incredibly bizarre. | ||
| Because this is exactly, I guess, what he should be saying. | ||
| Before I go back to your calls, let me just say this. | ||
| If you hear my voice endorsing a product on this radio show, that means I believe it. | ||
| Don't do this. | ||
| I don't want people to get in trouble when they hear some of the folks saying, we've got get-out-of-debt systems that are 100% bulletproof. | ||
| I don't know if that's the case. | ||
| I'm just saying I don't endorse that. | ||
| And I don't sell any magic products that are sure to cure you of this or sure to cure you of that. | ||
| I don't want you to believe that may not be the case. | ||
| Something bad happened to you, and I morally can't have to say this. | ||
| And you hear it all over talk radio. | ||
| I'm not blaming anybody here. | ||
| It's just that's the way the society is, and I'm just separating myself from it right here on air. | ||
| When I talk about real Made in America water filters that are top of the line, industry standards. | ||
| Water's full of poison, you need to go. | ||
| Everywhere but Iowa. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And there we go. | |
| There we go. | ||
| That is so fascinating because I'm listening to this episode and I'm hearing like, what the fuck are these commercials? | ||
| This is a tragedy. | ||
| And then Alex out of nowhere is like, hey look, these commercials are fucked up. | ||
| No. | ||
| Hey. | ||
| I gotta distance myself from this. | ||
| I would never do this shit. | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| I'm not gonna give you magic products. | ||
| Anyways, these water filters that don't do what I say they do? | ||
| Buy that shit. | ||
| These things that are advertised on the network that is my primary sponsor and money trickles down to me through the payment for my airtime, I don't endorse these things. | ||
| These things are nutty. | ||
| Why don't you get Ted Anderson on the phone and tell him to not play the fake cancer ad then, dude? | ||
| Seems like he has that kind of pull, right? | ||
| All InfoWords ads should be limerick-based. | ||
| That is my true belief. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| In all things. | ||
| If you can't turn it into a limerick, it doesn't go on InfoWars. | ||
| And it's gotta be dirty. | ||
| It's gotta be dirty. | ||
| There was a Cal Ben Soap commercial on this episode, but it did not involve limericks, so... | ||
| Well, then who fucking cares? | ||
| Cutting room floor. | ||
| He doesn't get to be in the show if you don't do a limerick. | ||
| No, it wasn't Marty Schachter. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It wasn't the guy. | |
| It was Alex just... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Gotcha. | |
| Yeah, he wasn't being forced into that situation. | ||
| So Alex, he has this standard now that he's established, and that is that if he's reading this, then he believes in it and he is endorsing it. | ||
| Well, here's a little commercial. | ||
| It's not Alex reading it, but it's technically Alex's boss reading it. | ||
| Which is weird. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Folks, this is Ted Anderson. | |
| You've all heard me on the radio talking about the importance of investing in precious metals. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I feel it's time for me to talk about the importance of investing in your health. | |
| I was presented with the opportunity to try TriVibes from TriVortex. | ||
| I was a bit hesitant of the idea of absorbing vitamins by wearing them rather than ingesting them. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm sorry, what? | |
| I'm sorry, what? | ||
| I was convinced that the product might actually work. | ||
| I now wear my TriVibes bands daily, and I'm feeling better than ever, not only physically, but also mentally. | ||
| TriVortex also offers amazingly beneficial and beautiful jewelry won by the women around the office daily. | ||
|
unidentified
|
TriVortex is amazing. | |
| No, no, you're absorbing the chair! | ||
| Try TriVortex yourself and have fun and learn with the test found on TriVortex.com. | ||
| Yep. | ||
| So TriVortex, huh? | ||
| TriVortex. | ||
| Wait, okay. | ||
| What? | ||
| Shouldn't they tell you what vitamins you are wearing, though? | ||
| Like, I would like to know. | ||
| Like, right now? | ||
| No, I mean, they're going to, okay, I'm going to wear some vitamins. | ||
| What vitamin? | ||
| B12. | ||
| Am I going to wear vitamin D? | ||
| Like, what are we talking about? | ||
| These are the questions you answer on the credit card page. | ||
| That's how they get you. | ||
| That's how they get you. | ||
| So TriVortex is a company scam that's run by this guy named Brian Anderson. | ||
| And, like, this website is amazing. | ||
| There's a bunch of magical bullshit on there. | ||
| He sells these discs that you can put drinks on, like a coaster. | ||
| Okay, you can't sell cures and discs. | ||
| It's a disc that you put a drink on, and it's like metal or something, and it magically makes the contents taste better. | ||
| No, you can't do that. | ||
| No, you can't sell vitamins you wear and discs that make your shit taste better. | ||
| That's not how it works. | ||
| Do you want to hear the beginning of one of the testimonials for the discs? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Of course! | |
| Quote. | ||
| I love your products, and so far, I'm impressed with how real they are. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And I definitely didn't write this, the owner of the company. | |
| The discs... | ||
| The discs have eight testimonials, and there's two of them that are, like, there's one that's by name X, and then there's a second... | ||
| Name X? | ||
| No, no, I don't remember what the name is. | ||
| But there's two that are doubled up. | ||
| It's the same person who wrote two testimonials for the same product. | ||
| It's very sketchy. | ||
| It's very normal. | ||
| It's definitely not the guy who owns the product. | ||
| Losing track of his aliases. | ||
| So not only do they make liquids taste better, but they also heal body pain. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| They make cold body parts warm and cool down body parts that are too hot. | ||
| Okay, I don't understand. | ||
| Stop it makes liquids taste better. | ||
| Everybody's fine with that. | ||
| No, it's magic. | ||
| Everybody's fine with that. | ||
| It doesn't also have to cure cancer. | ||
| They also seal wounds. | ||
| Oh, well, actually... | ||
| I'm back in. | ||
| Here is another very real customer's testimony. | ||
| Quote, I went in to get my haircut last month and my stylist had just cut her finger while clipping hair on the previous customer. | ||
| She sliced a portion of her skin off rather than the stabbing type cut and it wouldn't quit bleeding. | ||
| She had gone through several bandages without a veil. | ||
| When I realized what had happened I found the stainless steel plate in my purse and told her to hold it on the bandage for three minutes. | ||
| She did this without question, and the bleeding stopped immediately. | ||
| I mean... | ||
| She was quite impressed. | ||
| I mean, you know, I was all ready to be like, oh, this is clearly a fake review. | ||
| And then after it was like somebody who put a disc on a wound for three minutes and then it stopped bleeding, it's like, that would have happened with anything you put on that wound. | ||
| I mean, it's really just applying pressure, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, yeah, yeah. | |
| You could have put a doorstop on that wound. | ||
| Magic doorstop. | ||
| Still would have stopped bleeding. | ||
| I think it's a fake review because of the part where he describes that it's not a stabbing type cut. | ||
| Yeah, that one's definitely... | ||
| Getting a little too specific about the type of cut. | ||
| Listen, I've gotten a couple of people who emailed me saying that they're worried that it's a stabbing type pain. | ||
| So I'm just going to put this out there. | ||
| So they also have a pouch that you wear around your neck that has herbs in it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And then you absorb them through this magical amulet. | |
| That's how it works. | ||
| And there's jewelry that you can get herbs in. | ||
| Oh, God, it's so cool. | ||
| I hate how much people who hate witches sell witch shit. | ||
| Yeah? | ||
| That's one of the things that makes me so mad. | ||
| Preach! | ||
| I do not get a portrait! | ||
| Burn the witches, but let's sell the things we find in their homes. | ||
| Listen, they don't have bad ideas. | ||
| Right, right, right. | ||
| They're just women. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Full stop! | ||
| So, unfortunately, folks, we have only one last clip. | ||
| Oh, no! | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Holy shit! | ||
| How long have we been doing this for? | ||
| About an hour and ten, hour and fifteen. | ||
| Hour and ten? | ||
| Jesus, it's alive. | ||
| Yeah, it's... | ||
| I know you think you want that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Listen. | |
| Here's what's great about our three-hour episodes. | ||
| Two commutes. | ||
| Not one commute. | ||
| And you can listen to them at your leisure instead of sitting in a chair. | ||
| Listen to half on the way to work, listen to half on the way back. | ||
| Look, I would love if this was a six-hour episode. | ||
| Don't get me wrong. | ||
| Actually, I wouldn't. | ||
| I'm sweating quite a bit already. | ||
| That was a good bluff, though. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You shouldn't have given up on it immediately. | ||
| I've got a full house! | ||
|
unidentified
|
No, I don't. | |
| Nah, I got shit. | ||
| I had a pair of twos. | ||
| Yeah, you win. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| One time, I was playing poker with a buddy of mine, and I had a pair of twos. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And I loved the twos. | ||
| The deuce. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Sure. | |
| Loved it. | ||
| Two twos. | ||
| Well, even if I have one, I like it, because it's funny if you beat someone with twos. | ||
| So he had a pair of kings. | ||
| I go all in. | ||
| He calls and he's like, what, do you have three of a kind? | ||
| And I flip over my twos and I say, not yet. | ||
| And then the next card is a two. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And he threw the table. | |
| He was so mad at me. | ||
| You know, there's always that. | ||
| So I recently... | ||
| It's one of the only times my cocky response like that has ever materialized. | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| For a short period of time, I got weirdly into close-up magic on YouTube. | ||
| I spent like three days just being like, oh shit, how did they do that? | ||
| That's very normal. | ||
| So every time on the Penn& Teller Fool Me show, all the close-up magic guys will eventually do this thing where they're like... | ||
| What's your card? | ||
| And then they'll pull it completely blind, like, wouldn't it have been cool if I pulled this card? | ||
| Like, if that happened on TV, like, if it really happened, you'd have to end the show. | ||
| Like, you'd be like, no, we can't. | ||
| We'll start over. | ||
| What do you do? | ||
| Everybody just stops and goes... | ||
| Three people, like, jump off a roof. | ||
| I can't live in this world. | ||
| It's coming true! | ||
| So we've got one last clip. | ||
| Was that the point? | ||
| What? | ||
| So we get a little bit of closure. | ||
| Ron Paul was meeting with the military. | ||
| The whole military. | ||
| And he does show up for like the last few minutes of the show. | ||
| And they talk about basically nothing. | ||
| Okay, we're going to have to get him up next week. | ||
| We've got him for five minutes right now. | ||
| I twisted my arm to get him on. | ||
| Just the listeners batter me to get him on, so I lobby him. | ||
| He's such a great American. | ||
| We've got him five minutes. | ||
| Congressman, will you join me again next week for the customary 20? | ||
| We'll do everything possible to do it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I will give you almost an absolute. | |
| Well, that sounds like maybe not. | ||
| That's a big old no. | ||
| Maybe Alex in 2006 didn't have as much pull. | ||
| Hey, are you going to click yes on this Facebook input? | ||
| Yeah, really. | ||
| Ron Paul, do you like me? | ||
| Because you clicked maybe. | ||
| You've clicked maybe, and I don't think I can handle the maybe, buddy. | ||
| Yeah, I think oftentimes maybe actually really means no. | ||
| It's a big old no. | ||
| Is that Jack Johnson? | ||
| It seems to me that maybe... | ||
| No, he was asking that guy. | ||
| Are you Jack Johnson, sir? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Jack Johnson! | |
| Jack Johnson? | ||
| Okay. | ||
| Everyone's staring at me like I made up a musician. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Has no one heard of Jack Johnson yet? | |
| Did I get the name wrong? | ||
| What's up? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, shit. | |
| My 23-year-old self is gonna get his ass kicked by you later. | ||
| Wait until we talk about how he badgered me to play Tim McGraw on the drive over here. | ||
| Listen. | ||
| Two people in the car had not heard the song Indian Outlaw. | ||
| Which is an incredibly offensive song. | ||
| And then two people heard one minute of the song Indian Outlaw. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And then refused to hear any more of the episode. | |
| It was a different time when Tim McGraw wrote. | ||
| No, it was still offensive then. | ||
| It was about there. | ||
| So, Jordan, what do you feel you've learned today? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I feel... | ||
| At the end of this, here's the weird thing. | ||
| At the end of this, what I really take away is a lot of pathos for that car. | ||
| Like, as... | ||
| As we've gone along, the more I've thought about the car and the way that the car might feel in the context of this episode, is that if the car were an anthropomorphic device, and it were forced to participate in an InfoWars commercial, this makes perfect sense. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And it's like, it concerns me. | |
| I'm worried about this car. | ||
| So Texas Independence Day is not celebrated. | ||
| Nope. | ||
| I do like that there's a narrative arc with Ron Paul, will he, won't he? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That was a nice thing that teased throughout. | ||
| Took some boring calls. | ||
| We got to hear from Louisiana Dentures. | ||
| Louisiana Dentures is always great to hear from. | ||
| Hey, I mean, it's a good day at the office. | ||
| Alex, clock out after that. | ||
| Pretend that Ron Paul's going to come on next week. | ||
| And then go make some more money from people who scam cancer patients. | ||
| Hey, you know, this is a show people came to see live. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Thank you all so much. | ||
| We've all been wonderful. | ||
| I guess... | ||
| I think we're going to have to do a little bit of an ending. | ||
| What's up? | ||
| We're going to have to do a little bit of the closeout, right? | ||
| Yeah, I mean, look... | ||
| We're going to need DJ Danerkey up here. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, yeah, it's true. | |
| Obviously. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Ladies and gentlemen, DJ Dan Erkay! | |
| So, give it up one more time for Marty DeRosa! | ||
| Please, take care of the bar staff. | ||
| Tip them well, treat them right. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And until next time, we have a website. | |
| We do indeed. | ||
| It's knowledgefight.com. | ||
| We're also on Twitter. | ||
| We are! | ||
| It's at knowledge underscore fight. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yep! | |
| We'll be back. | ||
| But until then, I'm Neo. | ||
| I'm Leo. | ||
| I'm DZX Clark. | ||
| I am the juiciest ice cube! |
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