All Episodes
Jan. 17, 2018 - Knowledge Fight
01:35:05
#120: January 27, 2016

Today, Dan tells Jordan all about a very groundbreaking episode of The Alex Jones Show, where we get a sense of where Alex's martyr complex comes from, and whether Alex prefers "facts" or "lore." This episode was broadcast the day after LaVoy Finnecum was killed at the Oregon Wildlife Preserve Standoff. That event has put Alex Jones into the kind of headspace where he accidentally says a number of things that he usually keeps inside, and luckily, Knowledge Fight is here to bring those things to light.

Participants
Main voices
a
alex jones
14:37
d
dan friesen
53:08
j
jordan holmes
20:04
Appearances
j
joe biggs
01:30
Clips
j
joel skousen
00:34
p
pastor david manning
00:02
| Copy link to current segment

Speaker Time Text
alex jones
Andy in Kansas, you're on the air.
Thanks for holding.
unidentified
Hello, Alex.
jordan holmes
I'm a first-time caller.
unidentified
I'm a huge fan.
I love your work.
alex jones
I love you.
dan friesen
Hey, everybody.
Welcome back to Knowledge Fight.
I'm Dan.
jordan holmes
I'm Jordan.
dan friesen
We're a couple dudes who like to sit around, drink novelty beverages, and talk a little bit about Alex Jones.
jordan holmes
That's what we do.
Dan, is there a hook to that?
dan friesen
There is.
There's a hook, and that is that I know a lot about Alex Jones.
jordan holmes
I don't know anything about Alex Jones.
alex jones
Indeed.
dan friesen
That is the hook.
Also, just because we've got to say it up top.
jordan holmes
Gotta.
dan friesen
This Saturday, we'll be live.
jordan holmes
You have to listen to this plug, or you won't get the rest of the show.
You can turn it off now, but you won't get the rest of the show.
dan friesen
And let me tell you, today, sit through this plug happily, because I got some fucked up stuff to play for you that Alex Jones said deep in the past.
jordan holmes
That's how good we are at advertising.
Guys, hold tight.
We're gonna plug.
Just ignore this part.
dan friesen
Please don't.
jordan holmes
And then you'll get to the...
No, no, don't worry about this plug.
We gotta do it, but just ignore it.
Just...
This isn't for you.
dan friesen
We'll be at the Playground Theater January 20th at 10.30pm.
Tickets still available?
jordan holmes
I don't know.
They're going fast.
dan friesen
You can get tickets at playgroundtheater.com slash knowledge dash fight.
Is that right?
jordan holmes
I think it might just be playground.com.
You know what?
dan friesen
Theplayground.com.
Who cares?
jordan holmes
Hell if I know.
This, again, we're bad at this.
dan friesen
We'll tweet out the link.
Anyway, we'll be live.
It'll be a great time.
We'll have a lot of fun.
I'm still not entirely sure what episode of Alex Jones we'll be covering.
That is still up in the air to a certain degree.
jordan holmes
Yeah, it's theplaygroundtheater.com slash shows slash knowledge dash fight.
dan friesen
Yes.
jordan holmes
That's a lot to get through.
Just go to theplaygroundtheater.com and figure it out.
dan friesen
Right.
jordan holmes
Sooner or later you'll be able to buy tickets.
dan friesen
Novelty beverage today is becoming pretty habitual at this point.
Arnold Palmer.
jordan holmes
This time we're going with light, which is a third less calories.
dan friesen
The zero calories, which we have been drinking a bit in the past.
jordan holmes
Apparently they have four different types.
Regular, one-third less calories, two-thirds less calories, zero calories.
dan friesen
Dude, they also got a strawberry one, too.
jordan holmes
Do they?
dan friesen
Yeah, it's pretty good.
jordan holmes
How many calories?
dan friesen
Tons.
jordan holmes
So much.
dan friesen
It's a lot.
jordan holmes
Almost as many sugars as that one bullshit we drank.
dan friesen
No, not nearly that much.
Not a mystic level.
unidentified
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
dan friesen
But something that's mystical in terms of their allure to me is...
jordan holmes
The rap hero mystical.
dan friesen
No, he's not a hero.
He is a horrible dude.
jordan holmes
I'm sorry, what?
dan friesen
He went to prison for aggravated sexual assault.
jordan holmes
Okay, well then fuck mystical.
dan friesen
Yeah, mystical.
jordan holmes
I take all of that back forever.
dan friesen
It really gave a very different feel to that one line of his.
It was like, I came in with my dick.
unidentified
Get my hand.
Be cool!
jordan holmes
Not good.
No, that's describing the crime you just committed.
dan friesen
Exactly.
But, look, I'd like to give a shout-out to our donors.
No way to pivot out of that one.
Jesus.
Jordan, what the hell?
jordan holmes
I'm sorry.
I'm tearing it down.
dan friesen
I'd like to give a shout-out to our new donators.
What's up out there, Hannah?
Thanks for becoming a policy wonk.
alex jones
I'm a policy wonk.
dan friesen
Thank you so much.
jordan holmes
Thank you so much, Hannah.
dan friesen
We appreciate it.
jordan holmes
You should tell this to your sisters.
dan friesen
Oh, boy.
I'd like to also give a shout-out to...
unidentified
Hold on.
dan friesen
I get it.
jordan holmes
To your sisters.
unidentified
Okay.
dan friesen
I'd like to also say thank you very much and congratulations to a new globalist out there.
jordan holmes
Oh, shit!
dan friesen
What's up out there, John H.?
alex jones
I'm a policy wonk.
unidentified
Go home to your mother and tell her you're brilliant.
pastor david manning
Someone sodomite sent me a bucket of poop.
alex jones
Daddy shark!
dan friesen
We really appreciate it so much.
Thank you.
jordan holmes
Look, this isn't about money anymore.
I just want...
To have one episode where, like, ten different people decide to become globalists, and we just play that forever, and then we just end the show.
dan friesen
That would end up, it's nine seconds long.
jordan holmes
Yeah, I would be fine with that.
I would be fine with that.
dan friesen
We do appreciate it so much, and in addition to, like, as if I needed more work to do for this show, in addition to the live show that we're putting together, we are well on our way towards making that goal.
jordan holmes
Oh, really?
dan friesen
Yes.
We are on pace.
To make the goal which will force us to start doing the documentary coverage.
jordan holmes
Guys, we did not believe in you.
We appreciate it very much.
Dan, this was a bluff, and you guys have called it.
dan friesen
Thank you.
If we reach our goal, which I believe we're 60% of the way, too, at this point, by February 1st, we will begin breaking down Alex Jones' documentary Endgame, which will be a disaster for my sanity and my sleep schedule.
jordan holmes
I'll be fine.
dan friesen
My sanity, as I pronounce very weirdly.
unidentified
So, Jordan, today, on the show, on the broadcast.
jordan holmes
All right, if you had the plug paused, now is the time to start it.
dan friesen
Right.
Today, Jordan, as we mentioned on the last show, we got together this weekend and tried to compile a list of potential things to cover for our live show, Saturday, Playground Theater, 10.30pm.
January 20th.
Right?
unidentified
Yeah.
dan friesen
We came up with a list.
Included on that list was the day Ratzinger, the old Pope, stepped down.
jordan holmes
Which seems like a great day.
dan friesen
I think that would have been amazing.
jordan holmes
Yeah.
dan friesen
Turns out Alex Jones was on a week-long vacation when that happened.
jordan holmes
Motherfucker!
dan friesen
And there was a guest host, so that episode doesn't work.
jordan holmes
Well, he was actually voting for the new Pope.
I don't know if you knew this or not.
Alex Jones is a cardinal in the Catholic Church.
dan friesen
That could be it.
That might have explained it.
Yep.
Another one was the leap year in 2012.
unidentified
Right.
dan friesen
How's he going to play on the leap year?
jordan holmes
Yeah.
dan friesen
He might get weird about that, about the calendar and overages and shortages.
jordan holmes
That's the type of Alex Jones that we like to deal with.
dan friesen
Absolutely.
jordan holmes
It's just the guy who's like, leap years are a globalist plot.
I'm in.
dan friesen
I'm in.
Absolutely.
That would be amazing.
Unfortunately, I went back to that day and he's just saying, Ron Paul could still win.
He's in Louisiana broadcasting from a hotel room.
It's terrible.
It's an awful show.
jordan holmes
I'm a big fan.
dan friesen
Very, very boring.
And so I went through a bunch of these possibilities and they're just nothing.
They're no good.
But one of them stuck out in my mind.
That is like, this is gonna be a good one.
jordan holmes
Yeah.
It's just not a live show.
dan friesen
I listened to it and it turns out it is a good one.
But we could not do this one live.
jordan holmes
Okay.
dan friesen
And that is the day after Lavoie Finnicum got shot by the police.
In that Oregon...
jordan holmes
Wait, was that the...
The Oregon Wildlife Preserve?
unidentified
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
jordan holmes
Okay.
All right.
All right.
There we go.
dan friesen
Because I knew Alex would be freaking out after that.
jordan holmes
You know what's a crazy coincidence?
I have been bored at work, so I've just been listening to old dollops.
I listened to that episode earlier today.
dan friesen
It's a good episode.
jordan holmes
It's a good one.
dan friesen
We probably won't get into the actual standoff all that much.
jordan holmes
I wouldn't understand why we would.
dan friesen
We have to deal with it slightly briefly, just because they get super racist about it.
Of course.
At the same time.
jordan holmes
How could you not get racist about a bunch of weird, false military white guys occupying a bird reserve?
dan friesen
Right.
Well, the way they get racist is really fascinating, and I'm excited to talk about it.
But what's more fascinating is, Alex, I don't know what's going on.
But he says a couple of things in this episode that are beyond the pale.
I told you this before the show, and I stand by it.
You have to look at Alex Jones completely differently after you hear a couple of things he says on this episode.
This episode will give some context to some of the beliefs he has and where they come from.
And how stupid he is.
unidentified
Okay.
dan friesen
So we will do that.
We'll get into that.
jordan holmes
I believe Orca should run this planet.
Climate change is good.
dan friesen
Well, that's actually the episode.
I mean...
Yeah.
jordan holmes
Nailed it.
dan friesen
Yeah, you accidentally stumbled into it.
jordan holmes
Let's get out of here.
Let's get a go.
dan friesen
So where we're going to start today is at the beginning of the episode, Alex Jones is talking about how he doesn't want this to get hot.
He doesn't want it to be a hot war.
Right.
No, of course not.
That's not what they're into.
They're not into shooting.
These people at this preserve are amateurs, and there's probably feds, and it shouldn't get into a violent war now.
Let's not do that.
jordan holmes
I'm glad you qualified it with the now part.
dan friesen
Well, he's into that.
But then also, what he ends up saying after it is incredibly telling about his mentality.
And his personal feeling about his place in the world.
This is some weird stuff to start out with.
jordan holmes
The Mormons are literal birds.
alex jones
I have put the energy for 21 years of someone willing to die, ready to die, into an information war.
jordan holmes
But not that way.
alex jones
And I'm fully ready to be shut up, fully ready to be put in prison, fully ready to be killed.
But when it happens, I'll do my best if it happens.
To have it be just like the archetype of the martyr.
jordan holmes
If he says Martin Luther King Jr.
alex jones
I'm killing everybody.
Lower my hands and let Darth Vader cut me right in half.
Then I win.
Then that death means something.
Then that death is worth millions dying in a fight.
But you have to build the consciousness.
You have to build the system.
You have to build the personality.
You have to build the sacrifice.
And make the sacrifice great, and make the sacrifice loved when it's destroyed.
As they try to assassinate my character, as they try to kill my name, it's already a martyr-level event, which humans admire at a deep, primitive level.
dan friesen
So, from the jump...
We're getting this idea.
First of all, he's trying to take the shine off Lavoie a little bit.
unidentified
Yeah.
dan friesen
And be like, I'm the real martyr.
jordan holmes
Come on, fuck that guy.
dan friesen
Why don't you guys understand that for 20 years I've been building myself up as a martyr that no one will ever martyr?
jordan holmes
And I'm going to become a force ghost.
alex jones
Right, exactly.
jordan holmes
Why don't you guys get this?
unidentified
Right, right, right.
dan friesen
Absolutely.
I think that that's kind of, I mean, it's indicative of a real mental disorder.
unidentified
Yeah.
dan friesen
I think there's a narcissism in there.
unidentified
Oh, you think?
dan friesen
A little bit of one.
But the way he's saying it isn't like his standard manic thing that he gets whenever he gets into these sort of hyper-narcissistic bloviating sessions that he gets into.
jordan holmes
No, he believes this.
This is 100% a real thing he believes.
dan friesen
I think, and especially as what we're going to get into, I think this is him externalizing a little bit of stuff that he generally keeps inside.
And one of them is that...
Don't you guys understand?
I'm gonna be the hero.
unidentified
Right.
dan friesen
When they take me down, I will be the hero.
He's creating a stage for himself to be what he sees himself to be in his own mind.
That's fascinating.
Because that's a very interesting psychology.
jordan holmes
He wants to die for the cause, but like, hold on now.
dan friesen
He's making up a cause.
jordan holmes
Not now.
dan friesen
Right, right, right.
unidentified
No, no, no.
jordan holmes
I will.
Hold on now, though.
dan friesen
And when the time comes, I'm going to make sure I cheat it so I look like a victim.
Which definitely is in line with all of his philosophies and what have you.
So, in this next clip, Alex Jones gets into how he believes that the Bundy group has been infiltrated and there's feds and shit like that.
And then says something that might be...
jordan holmes
The weird thing is, I think he is right.
He might be, I don't know.
Like, they all just got off.
dan friesen
No, no, no, no, no.
But the way he's saying it is like, it's crawling with feds.
jordan holmes
Oh, okay.
dan friesen
And he's also saying that all those people who were dressed up like Uncle Sam and all that shit, they were feds.
jordan holmes
Okay.
dan friesen
Trying to make those people look like assholes.
jordan holmes
All of the dildos?
dan friesen
Yeah.
jordan holmes
Feds.
dan friesen
Feds.
Feds sent in those dildos.
Oh, yeah.
jordan holmes
But the Cards Against Humanity guy, he did send in that giant thing.
dan friesen
He's a fed.
jordan holmes
No, he's just a merry trickster.
dan friesen
So the Bundy group has been infiltrated.
joe biggs
Yep.
dan friesen
And then he says, like I said, he says something at the middle to end of this clip that feels like code.
jordan holmes
Okay.
alex jones
The Bundys are not the operatives.
You can listen to them, take one look at them.
We know where they came from.
They're good people.
But they wouldn't have been the George Washingtons leading the fight.
They would have been the guys in the trenches.
They are not generals.
jordan holmes
Take them out.
We don't need them.
We don't need them.
dan friesen
You take one good look at them, you know where they come from.
They're good people.
They're white.
But then beyond that, they're not generals.
jordan holmes
They're still trash.
They're white trash.
dan friesen
But that's not even what he's saying.
He's talking about...
He's calling himself the general.
jordan holmes
Yeah, no, of course.
dan friesen
Without having to say it.
jordan holmes
Oh, we all knew.
dan friesen
By denigrating them, even though they're ostensibly being way more active in the same goal that Alex has.
jordan holmes
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
dan friesen
He's saying, nah, nah, nah, they're too dumb, they're whatever.
jordan holmes
I mean, can you really disagree with him?
dan friesen
Not fully.
Nope.
jordan holmes
He does have a point.
dan friesen
They are not generals.
jordan holmes
They are not generals.
dan friesen
No.
So now, at this point...
This is where we start...
jordan holmes
They aren't even in the military.
dan friesen
No, certainly not.
jordan holmes
They were lying about that.
dan friesen
No.
Oh, yeah, that is true.
A lot of stolen valor.
jordan holmes
We're all Marines.
dan friesen
Yeah.
jordan holmes
No, you're not.
dan friesen
So, at this point, Jordan, and this is pretty early in the episode, Alex Jones starts to take a pivot away from talking about the Bundys specifically and starting to talk about his understanding of government.
jordan holmes
And Ted Bundy.
dan friesen
No, nope, doesn't get into them.
Oh, okay.
His understanding of government, his understanding of history, and this stuff, it's fucking wild stuff.
Here's the first one where he talks about the intelligence community.
alex jones
There's different factions.
There's at least seven factions we know of in the CIA.
Three major factions in the NSA.
Different administrations come in and try to create new factions or take over other ones.
There's Army versus CIA.
There's Navy versus Army.
dan friesen
That's a football game.
jordan holmes
So it's a gang war?
alex jones
There's the Marine Corps, standalone.
jordan holmes
Right.
alex jones
There's defense intelligence.
jordan holmes
Everybody's cool with the Marine Corps.
dan friesen
He's describing departments.
jordan holmes
Everybody's cool with the Marine Corps.
No, no, no.
They're factions, Dan.
unidentified
Hold on.
jordan holmes
They're factions that are always at war with each other.
dan friesen
Let the man finish the clip.
alex jones
There's the big megabanks above it trying to control and manipulate it all.
Then there's international factions.
It's not just, let's go have a war with the feds.
Let's have it start here like the Alamo.
dan friesen
So that's what he's saying.
It's like there's these intelligence factions departments.
jordan holmes
Right.
dan friesen
And then he expands it without being specific in any way or even what he's talking about.
jordan holmes
And then there are corporations.
dan friesen
There's international factions.
Yeah, come on!
jordan holmes
The CIA is also overseas.
Who knows?
Could be anywhere.
dan friesen
No, that's a little weird.
jordan holmes
Is it?
dan friesen
Yeah, because I would say...
For someone in Alex Jones' position, it behooves him to be more specific about what he's talking about.
If there's seven factions in the CIA, come out with it.
What are you talking about?
jordan holmes
Okay, look.
You're in the CIA.
There's factions.
How could there be seven different factions?
There aren't enough ideological differences.
dan friesen
Probably not.
jordan holmes
In the CIA, what is it like?
I want more...
BLTs in the lunchroom.
Like, what kind of factions are we talking about?
dan friesen
There's not even enough primary colors for them to all have different colored neckerchiefs.
jordan holmes
Ooh, that's true.
dan friesen
For identification purposes.
If you see the damn green neckerchief people and you're one of the orange...
jordan holmes
Fuck them.
dan friesen
Don't go over there.
jordan holmes
No, no, no, no.
unidentified
Do not...
dan friesen
Do not set trip with the fucking factions of the CIA.
jordan holmes
They will fucking spy on you.
Those guys are crazy.
We're not even into that shit.
dan friesen
But we also know that there's only like 15% of them who do the killing.
The rest of them are chicken necks.
unidentified
Right, right, right.
dan friesen
So you wouldn't have to worry about set tripping around the chicken necks.
jordan holmes
Well, but every faction is led by one of the guys who does the killing.
dan friesen
It has to be.
I mean, mathematically, if it's 20%...
jordan holmes
Right.
dan friesen
Who cares?
unidentified
Anyway...
jordan holmes
I think everybody does.
This is the most important news of the day.
dan friesen
No, it's not.
Maybe so far?
jordan holmes
Okay.
dan friesen
And not the day, the show, because the day, oh boy.
But this next clip is profoundly fucked up.
Put your mic down for this.
jordan holmes
Okay.
dan friesen
And, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy.
You're about to get a history lesson.
Courtesy of Emmerich Jones.
alex jones
Let's have it start here like the Alamo!
dan friesen
I just put that there so it's clear that there's no break between these clips.
Long pause.
alex jones
You know that they planned with President Andrew Jackson in 1835 a year out what they did in Texas.
You know they sent Colonel Travis, this is inside baseball, but it's leaked out here and there, but this is confirmed, down to the Alamo to fight 10 to 1 odds to die, to create a chain reaction to give birth to Texas, because they were hardcore folks.
And they were Christians, but they basically followed a Rosicrucian founding father basic cult deal.
Where they really wanted to found the new Atlantis.
They really wanted to build a new civilization based on human empowerment.
And they wanted to die in sacrifice against tyranny.
They don't really make people like that anymore much, do they?
And they went and they basically planned it and they knew it.
And then Travis told the men, you're all going to die.
Step across the line and join me in history.
And they stepped across just like the 300.
unidentified
300.
dan friesen
Long pause.
alex jones
They planned with Andrew Jackson an event similar to that.
They didn't know exactly how it would go down a year before.
And then they found Travis, who'd already won some battles and was a born leader, to lead it.
And he wrote on that letter to my family when he left his son with the Ayers family, my mom's side.
And said, take care of my little boy.
And then he wrote the other letter and said, I'm not giving up victory or death.
And they hoped to get reinforcements, but they knew they weren't coming.
And they knew where they were going.
And they knew that they were coming to draw Santa Ana into the South so they could get ready in the East with the armies.
With Sam Houston.
Under the direct command of President...
Andrew Jackson in a covert action of the United States of America to take a third of Mexico.
dan friesen
That was a sovereign country.
alex jones
That's how you plan things.
That's how you win.
That's how you kick the British Empire's butt that nobody can stop.
Real planning, real sacrifice, real long-term commitment.
Not ten guys in camo and three of them are, I mean...
dan friesen
He's implying that at the end three of them are feds.
jordan holmes
Yeah.
dan friesen
So, Jordan, I want to ask you a couple questions.
The first thing...
jordan holmes
Oh, I don't have any questions for what that...
That was clearly self-explanatory.
Everything about that makes perfect sense.
dan friesen
Do you know anything about Colonel Travis?
Colonel William Travis?
jordan holmes
I don't, but I'm of the opinion that anybody who winds up overrun by thousands of Mexican soldiers because he's bad at position...
Probably didn't do so well.
dan friesen
Well, it's interesting that Alex is presenting this as this thing, like a pincer move by Sam Houston and what have you.
No.
Sam Houston said, hey, blow up the Alamo and get out of San Antonio.
That was his order that was ignored.
jordan holmes
Planned.
dan friesen
Plan ignoring.
jordan holmes
By Andrew Jackson.
dan friesen
Right.
Hickory.
unidentified
Old Hickory.
jordan holmes
Not only that, Andrew Jackson planned to tell Houston to say that to Travis.
So Travis would be like, fuck you, and do what he did.
Covert action.
dan friesen
At this point...
jordan holmes
Three factions of the CIA planned that.
dan friesen
Seven of them.
jordan holmes
Yeah, but the four of them didn't even know.
dan friesen
No, four were red-shirted in the action.
So, Jordan.
Now, I think, is the most appropriate time ever to talk a little bit about Colonel William Travis.
jordan holmes
I've never heard that sentence before, so clearly it must be true.
dan friesen
I'm going to give you a bit of a history lesson that researching tickled the shit out of me today.
I initially thought there's no way I'm going to be able to get this episode together in time to do it, but I did, and this is a fun story.
So, William Travis was born in 1809 in South Carolina.
He was born in South Carolina.
jordan holmes
We're off to a bad start.
dan friesen
And then after the War of 1812, his parents moved to Conocoa County in Alabama.
There's a lot of frontiersmanship.
jordan holmes
Let's go somewhere worse!
Right.
dan friesen
His uncle Alexander founded a school in Sparta, Alabama, which was a part of Conoco County, and so William got the chance to attend it, and he was able to get an education.
He'd go on to be a school teacher, a teacher's assistant, at a different school, where he taught for less than a year because he got the hots for one of his 16-year-old students, and they started fucking.
unidentified
Yeah.
dan friesen
So they ended up getting married.
jordan holmes
This is Alabama!
dan friesen
They ended up getting married when she was 16, likely because he got her pregnant.
jordan holmes
Naturally.
dan friesen
And some time frame records show that she probably gave birth before they were married, or at very least she was pregnant before the marriage.
jordan holmes
Right.
dan friesen
And back then, that was not good.
jordan holmes
Shotgun wedding.
dan friesen
That was not done.
jordan holmes
Shotgun wedding.
dan friesen
So, at that point, he decided.
I'm not going to teach anymore.
unidentified
No.
dan friesen
And so he and his wife moved, and he moved to a place called Claiborne.
Claiborne?
Claiborne?
Claiborne.
That's a rough name.
So he decided he was going to start studying law.
Because back then, that was really easy.
jordan holmes
True.
They had four.
dan friesen
As he was studying law...
He also started a newspaper called the Clay Barn Herald, which did okay for a little while.
Made a little bit of coin.
But then it started to not make as much money and he had like, you know, I gotta support my family.
I have no idea.
I'm not making enough from this paper.
And the stress of running the paper got so bad to him that he kept fucking up the paper.
He would print advertisements upside down.
jordan holmes
I never learned to read!
dan friesen
You'd have ads going way past their expiration date in the paper, and it just was a complete disaster.
And in an event that would go on to mirror his future, this is a sentence that I wrote that I'm thrilled with.
In an event that would mirror his future at the Alamo, he would ask for help with the paper, but reinforcements were not coming.
jordan holmes
Oh, get out!
dan friesen
But he did.
jordan holmes
Get out!
dan friesen
He kept trying to get financial support, and no one was helping him out, and so he was just in a terrible place.
In 1829, he passed his law exam, right?
So at that point, he borrows $55.37 to order...
jordan holmes
$10.5 million in today's money.
dan friesen
Totally.
To start a law office.
He also borrows $90 to cover his expenses with the Herald, right?
Right.
Unfortunately, he wasn't getting any clients for his law firm because no one needed a lawyer.
It was a small fucking town.
unidentified
It was a small fucking area, and they already had a lawyer.
jordan holmes
Where would we even go to trial?
There ain't judges here.
dan friesen
They already had a lawyer who was the guy who mentored him.
jordan holmes
Yeah.
dan friesen
And so, like, we don't need another one.
We already got this guy.
And so he's just in a disastrous position where he's spent all this money, he's in debt, and now he can't even make money doing law because no one cares.
jordan holmes
Right.
dan friesen
So he's getting nothing.
He's just getting deeper and deeper into debt.
And so he decides to buy a couple slaves in order to...
jordan holmes
Boy, that just...
It could solve a lot of problems back then, apparently.
dan friesen
He buys two slaves in order to try and help out, right?
jordan holmes
What?
dan friesen
But the irony of this is that feeding his slaves ended up pushing him deeper into debt.
So...
jordan holmes
I mean...
Silver lining.
Silver lining.
dan friesen
It's just a tragedy of, like, everybody.
Everybody is in tragedy.
The wife is clearly not happy.
She's, you know, living with this guy.
unidentified
Right.
dan friesen
Whoever's buying ads in his paper isn't happy.
They're printed upside down.
jordan holmes
Not good.
dan friesen
This guy, William Travis, is not fucking having a great time.
And, of course, his slaves are not having a great time.
jordan holmes
The only person...
He jumped out on his mentor and he tried to start a competing business.
So his mentor's pissed, too.
dan friesen
And now it's interesting that you bring that up because he...
And he got a cease and desist.
All right.
unidentified
All right.
dan friesen
His debt at the time was $834.
jordan holmes
Nice.
dan friesen
Which is a lot back then.
jordan holmes
Yeah.
dan friesen
So the people he owed money to sued him.
jordan holmes
Of course.
dan friesen
And one of the people was his mentor, the lawyer that he studied under.
And in court, he tried to argue that his case should be dismissed because of infancy.
unidentified
But...
jordan holmes
He was a bad lawyer.
He'd only ever tried four cases before, so he didn't do well.
dan friesen
Yeah, he said that because he was so young, it should be thrown out of court.
jordan holmes
That makes sense.
That's like saying, I'm too pretty.
dan friesen
Yeah, somewhat.
Everybody in attendance, everybody in the court just started laughing at him.
It's recorded as a historical humiliation in court.
unidentified
Just everybody like, ha ha ha!
dan friesen
You still owe me money, you little baby.
That shit.
So, at that point, the court clerk issued an order for his arrest on March 31st, 1831.
jordan holmes
Right.
dan friesen
So, at this point, William...
jordan holmes
He hears about the Alamo.
dan friesen
More or less.
jordan holmes
And he starts a little plan with Andrew Jackson.
dan friesen
Nope.
jordan holmes
He doesn't?
dan friesen
Nope.
jordan holmes
I feel like we're gonna get there.
dan friesen
He hears about Texas, which is, at that point, a state...
In the Mexican Republic, right?
jordan holmes
Let's go somewhere worse!
dan friesen
So he heard there's a lot of land for speculation and that a lot of people out there needed lawyers.
And so he's like, oh, fuck yeah.
jordan holmes
Do you speak Spanish?
unidentified
Fuck!
dan friesen
And the other thing is he has an order for his arrest.
So he's got to get out of Alabama.
jordan holmes
Yeah, but he'll figure that one out.
He's a lawyer.
dan friesen
Right.
So at this point, he leaves his wife, who is now pregnant with his second child.
unidentified
Of course.
And runs off to Texas, fleeing arrest.
This is...
dan friesen
Dodging arrest.
jordan holmes
The dumbest dude.
dan friesen
Yeah.
It's rough.
jordan holmes
This is spectacular.
dan friesen
So, he gets to Texas, and he sets up a law practice in a city called Anhuac.
I'm not sure if that's the correct pronunciation or whatever, but at that point, he sets up a law practice.
He starts a militia, and they start agitating against the sovereign Mexican authorities.
jordan holmes
Why start a militia?
You know what?
I'll give it to this guy.
dan friesen
Because they're white people around a lot of Mexicans.
jordan holmes
Always shooting for the stars.
unidentified
Absolutely.
jordan holmes
Always shooting for the stars.
dan friesen
So through his actions and through his militia behaviors, he ends up getting arrested at one point, and he ends up also being conscribed as a soldier in order to raise a company of men to support the situation in San Antonio, which was a situation that would end up being the Alamo.
Right.
Travis considered, this is a quote here from an article on it.
Travis considered disobeying his orders, writing to Henry Smith, then the governor.
Yeah.
unidentified
I am willing, nay anxious, to go to defense of Bexar, but sir, I'm unwilling to risk my reputation by going off into...
Ha ha ha ha!
jordan holmes
I can't run this guy's reputation.
dan friesen
I'm unwilling to risk my reputation by going off into the enemy's country with such little means, so few men, and with them so badly equipped.
This is from an article in Texas Monthly.
Quote, Travis had sulked in camp waiting for Smith's reply, which never came.
Eventually, he had no choice but to trudge on to San Antonio.
He had no military experience, was until recently an unsuccessful lawyer, and was now the lieutenant colonel in the Texas Cavalry.
unidentified
Yeah.
dan friesen
It's so fucked up.
jordan holmes
Of course Alex Jones' family knows him.
That's the same shit.
That's Alex saying like, I am going to be a hero.
Look, I will go down to San Antonio.
I will be your hero.
dan friesen
You're getting ahead of it a little bit.
joe biggs
But listen.
dan friesen
You're getting the point, but you're a little ahead of it.
jordan holmes
Not yet.
dan friesen
Not right now.
Once we get to the end of this, the picture of proto-Alex Jones will be complete.
Alex Jones has very clearly based a lot of his personality on William Travis.
There is no doubt about that.
jordan holmes
That makes sense.
dan friesen
From being a completely see-through, bumbling, self-motivated prick.
jordan holmes
Right.
dan friesen
So, at this point, he's accidentally a lieutenant colonel in the Texas Cavalry, right?
jordan holmes
Who does not become one?
dan friesen
So, Travis and James Bowie are the two men who are supposed to be in charge of the companies that are at the Alamo.
One in charge of soldiers, one in charge of volunteers.
jordan holmes
And the other in charge of knives.
dan friesen
Sure, sure.
unidentified
Yep.
dan friesen
But, unfortunately, pretty quickly, Bowie gets sick, and for all intents and purposes, Travis, he ends up being in charge of all of the people at the Alamo.
He's in charge of the entire force.
jordan holmes
Hilarious.
dan friesen
So at the end of this, Travis ends up dying in what is a hopeless war, because he did only have like a hundred and something people there, and Santa Ana had a giant force.
But just ten days before he died, he sent out the following letter.
I'm just going to read you the letter that he wrote.
unidentified
HELL!
jordan holmes
Help!
dan friesen
You're not far off.
jordan holmes
Okay.
dan friesen
There are a number of letters that I've read of his also that predate this letter by, like, the weeks, a couple weeks before it all goes down.
jordan holmes
Help?
dan friesen
No, they're all just like...
unidentified
Help!
dan friesen
They're all just like, we need more people.
Send more armies.
And then, like, three days later, another letter, like, hey, it's rude for me to ask twice.
Like, that sort of shit.
unidentified
They're asking for armies like crazy.
jordan holmes
I'll fucking sue you guys.
dan friesen
Yeah.
jordan holmes
I will fucking sue you.
You know I'm a lawyer.
I'm gonna put out a full-page ad in the...
Oh, no.
dan friesen
So by this point...
jordan holmes
It's upside down.
dan friesen
Ten days before the end of everything, he ends up sending out this letter, and it's at this point that he probably has to realize shit is not gonna work out.
jordan holmes
Right.
dan friesen
And so he writes this letter.
Fellow citizens and compatriots, I am besieged by a thousand or more of the Mexicans under Santa Ana.
I have sustained a continual bombardment and cannonade for 24 hours and have not lost a man.
The enemy has demanded a surrender at discretion.
Bad move.
Bad move.
the enemy is receiving reinforcements daily and will no doubt increase to 3 or 4 thousand in 4 or 5 days if this call is neglected I am determined to sustain myself as long as possible and die like a soldier who never forgets what is due in his own honor and that of his country and then in all caps victory or death William Barrett Travis I would not want to be in his company.
This letter goes out, and...
People get really fired up about it.
And that's one of the big reasons why people have this image of remember the album.
It's because of the pretty well-written letter there.
jordan holmes
So this fucking idiot, this bumbling moron, this Mr. Magoo walking around through life, screwing up everything, writes a good letter and becomes a legend?
dan friesen
Well, now get this.
lot.
unidentified
So this is also from that Texas Monthly article about him.
dan friesen
They got his diary and they were reading over it.
And there's one passage in it where he's setting out.
This is like I made love to my first man today.
You are so close.
You are shockingly close.
jordan holmes
Of course!
dan friesen
So there's a passage in his diary where he says, like, I was setting off for some city, and it's the only time, you know, there's so many bogs and shit I couldn't get through.
It's the only time that I didn't follow through with my plan, or whatever.
It's along those lines.
jordan holmes
Right.
dan friesen
And so here's, I'm going to read to you from this Texas Monthly article that should bring everything into focus.
unidentified
Okay.
dan friesen
Otherwise, other than that thing, that short anecdote, the diary is simply a daily log of his law practice and personal expenses.
A document by an obsessive counter.
He lists his shirts and socks and he lists his sexual adventures.
Someone named Susanna is recorded as his 59th conquest.
He was then 24. Think about that in terms of Alex and his 150 women before he was 16 claims.
unidentified
I don't know.
jordan holmes
Are we going to believe this, asshole?
dan friesen
I don't know.
jordan holmes
I don't buy it.
dan friesen
I don't know.
jordan holmes
I don't even think he had that many shirts.
Let's start with that lie.
dan friesen
So, that brief underlined passage, the one about not turning back, is the only moment of personal assessment in the entire document.
There is in those words Travis's unstated reproach of himself for letting nature dominate his intentions.
He was a vain, moody man, idealistic and romantic.
He worked hard by day, and at night he gambled or consorted with prostitutes.
Or sat alone reading Sir Walter Scott.
He was brainy and ambitious and filled with passionate energy.
He spent all his short life seeking out a stage upon which to play out his self-appointed destiny.
The only thing he understood about himself was that he would not turn back.
He wanted to be a hero and a patriot, and he became a hero and a patriot.
He wrote his famous letter from the Alamo proclaiming his new role, and the world listened.
He had, with a few strokes of a pen, made his dreams real.
He had invented himself.
And invented Texas as well.
That's Alex Jones.
That's 100% Alex Jones.
jordan holmes
Why is it that the dumb run everything?
Isn't that amazing?
Why?
How?
unidentified
Isn't that amazing?
jordan holmes
How does this asshole bumble up to legend?
dan friesen
Well, because of that great letter.
jordan holmes
He wrote a great letter and that was fucking it!
God damn it!
dan friesen
The stakes were much lower back then.
jordan holmes
Well, clearly!
dan friesen
But then at the same time, because of this weird...
Sort of like the way we deal with the military and stuff.
I mean, even the Eastern cultures do, too.
Like, this bravery in the face of death makes a legend out of a man and that sort of thing.
jordan holmes
No, no, no.
I get it.
I get it.
dan friesen
But, I mean, this assessment rings so fucking true.
The idea that all his life he was seeking out a stage on which to play out his self-appointed destiny.
jordan holmes
Vane.
Moody.
Stupid.
dan friesen
That's Alex Jones' entire broadcast career.
It goes back to the first clip where he's like, I'm building myself up as a martyr.
He has his self-appointed destiny that he is forcing his audience to play out with him.
jordan holmes
Only consolation we have from all of this is the knowledge that there's no way Alex could write a good letter.
dan friesen
That's true.
jordan holmes
That's done.
We don't have to worry about him becoming a legend because his words will...
We'll stay on.
dan friesen
It would just be words as shapes.
jordan holmes
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
No, no.
I'm sure if William Travis had a broadcast show and you just actually got to listen to the dumb shit he says, he would not have become a legend.
dan friesen
No, he'd come in drunk.
jordan holmes
Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly.
dan friesen
Talk about banging prostitutes and stuff.
I mean, it's just fascinating to me.
When I started to look into his history, I was like, this unlocks so much about Alex.
And the fact that nowhere in the historical record is there any indication that this was a year-long plan of some Rosicrucian religious ceremony where they sacrificed themselves to create a new Atlantis.
That stuff is all bullshit.
That's all conspiracy bullshit that Alex has taken from unreputable sources and turned Yeah, where would you get that?
I don't know.
jordan holmes
Whose idea was that?
dan friesen
We're actually going to find out, I think.
jordan holmes
Oh, okay.
dan friesen
I think in a later clip.
But yeah, let's just jump back into it, because this next clip is even more fucked up.
If you thought that was fucked up.
jordan holmes
How could it not be?
dan friesen
This one's real fucked up.
alex jones
You see, this is all different religious orders, folks, battling each other over what controls America.
And you've got the dark side, Luciferian, 1776.
Copycat group that ran the French Revolution, Adam Weishaupt, trying to create a false Illuminati, or the light, liberty, God, and overtake it.
And George Washington wrote about this in at least nine different letters before he died.
Probably poisoned.
We know they bled him to death.
Because he was getting ready to lead a movement in the Masonic Order.
To kick the devil-worshipping Illuminati out of it that was trying to take it over.
I mean, you want to know the big secrets, folks?
This is it.
And it's there in history.
Peace is here and there.
And given down through lore.
dan friesen
Boom.
unidentified
Lore.
dan friesen
Right there.
alex jones
Right.
dan friesen
Right fucking there.
It's given down in lore.
Alex is basically believing oral tradition as literal history.
unidentified
Yeah, yeah.
dan friesen
He might as well believe everything that happened in the Iliad really happened.
jordan holmes
I'm sure he does.
dan friesen
Everything in the Odyssey really happened.
jordan holmes
I imagine he does.
dan friesen
Anything that the Burt Soleritsas of the Basque country say and they tell down from history, that's fucked up.
unidentified
Yeah.
dan friesen
And that should give...
Everybody's some sort of understanding of what he takes as a source.
jordan holmes
Now, if I understand him correctly, he just said that Washington, President George Washington, was poisoned to death, or at least bled to death, by a Luciferian Illuminati squad trying to recreate the light, the false light, in order to overtake the real light.
dan friesen
With Adam Weishaupt.
jordan holmes
And the reason that they had to kill Washington was because Washington was leading the good Illuminati?
dan friesen
And he was going to expose it to get rid of the Satanists within the...
jordan holmes
Within the good Illuminati.
dan friesen
Yeah.
jordan holmes
So we've got three factions of Illuminati is what he's describing right there.
dan friesen
Well, there's seven.
jordan holmes
No, that's the CIA.
It was a simpler time.
They couldn't even count to seven back then.
dan friesen
No, no, certainly not.
alex jones
They could only count to 1776.
dan friesen
So if you get down to it, when George Washington died, he was 67 years old after being a fucking soldier in the 1700s.
That's an absurd age to live to.
And he had to live through so much shit.
There's no way his health was good.
He had no business being alive at 67, quite frankly.
So, on the afternoon of December 13th, 1799, after spending most of the day in the frigid December rain and snow, supervising activities on his estate, he was, you know, at this point, one of the things you should know about George Washington.
jordan holmes
Hey, slaves!
They're gonna love me like this Travis motherfucker!
dan friesen
So Washington was super big on punctuality and never showed up late for dinner.
And because he was out in the rain and snow directing activities, he showed up for dinner and he didn't have time to change his clothes.
So he sat through dinner in his wet clothes from the day.
Also, his wife Martha had just gotten over a really bad cold.
So these are the circumstances surrounding his death.
On that day, he began to complain about a cough and runny nose.
And by two in the morning of that night...
He developed chest pains and shortness of breath.
So they call for James Crake, Dr. James Crake, who was his doctor of 40 years.
That doesn't seem like some sort of infiltrator.
jordan holmes
That's not a ringing endorsement either.
dan friesen
Not necessarily.
jordan holmes
If you're a doctor starting in, what, 1766?
dan friesen
Yeah.
jordan holmes
Not a good time to get your learning.
dan friesen
At the same time, George Rollins, who was the overseer of the estate, came to his bedside.
As morning came, Washington had a pronounced fever, and his breathing had gotten really bad.
So at 7.30 in the morning, George Rollins removed 12 to 14 ounces of blood at Washington's request.
alex jones
I know.
Bleed him.
dan friesen
That's what they did back then.
jordan holmes
Yeah, no, no, I know.
dan friesen
The humerus and stuff?
jordan holmes
Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course.
dan friesen
So Washington requested that, and then afterwards he's like, y 'all should take some more of my blood.
He asked them to take more.
And so throughout the morning...
They ended up taking more blood from him.
They tried to give him an enema.
jordan holmes
The beginning of adrenochrome.
dan friesen
They tried all sorts of things.
They tried to give him sage tea laced with vinegar to gargle.
That didn't work.
They tried to put some stuff in there to make it worse.
Because then it would be like, oh, that friction or whatever, whatever blisters we create will solve the other blisters.
jordan holmes
Because medicine was terrible back then.
dan friesen
So throughout the day, through the bleeding, weirdly, he did end up regaining some of his strength.
But his afternoon came.
He knew he wasn't going to make it, and he was quoted as saying, soon enough, he was struggling for air, and he told Dr. Craig, Doctor, I die hard, but I'm not afraid to go.
I believe from my first attack that I should not survive it.
My breath cannot last long.
Ever the gentleman, even in extremes, the general made a point of thanking all three doctors for their help.
Washington died at 10.20 p.m.
jordan holmes
I mean, I guess there's a certain bit of sense that they made with those, like, oh, well, shit's coming out of him, so maybe we should just try and get the shit out of him, you know?
Let's preempt the shit coming out.
Let's get rid of all of his blood.
dan friesen
It's super fucked up, because they ended up taking out 80 ounces of his blood.
That's a lot.
jordan holmes
Which is, it's not too amazing to me that Washington survived as long as he did.
Because that was really his only accomplishment.
Like, he was a bad general.
He wasn't good at tactics.
He wasn't good at strategy.
But he looked fucking amazing on a horse, and he should have died, like, 30 times, and he never did.
Like, his horse got shot, and it fell on him, and he was like, hey, guess what, I'm fine.
Like, he's got bullet holes in his shirt, and it was like, oh, weird, it hit off my watch.
Like, he was that guy.
He just would not die.
dan friesen
People still debate what it was that killed him.
jordan holmes
Probably the blood loss.
dan friesen
I think it's probably more the underlying cause of pneumonia or something like that.
But be that as it may, I'm being told in the chat I'd forgotten about this, but apparently there's a dollop all about his death.
So let's not get too much more into it, other than to say he wasn't poisoned by the Illuminati.
jordan holmes
He was not poisoned by the Illuminati.
dan friesen
Or was he?
Alex brings up the Illuminati.
He had written some letters about it.
And this is an indication that they had killed him.
And so I looked into that.
jordan holmes
Dearest Martha, the Illuminati are stealing my blood.
Could you help me out with this?
dan friesen
I know you just recovered from a cold, but be ever so kind as to stop the Illuminati from bleeding me.
jordan holmes
Hey, you had a cold.
I get it.
I get it.
I'm getting bled by the Illuminati.
Come on, give me one help.
dan friesen
So this German guy named G.W. Snyder sent Washington a letter on August 22, 1798.
I will read the relevant portion of this letter to you.
It was sometime since that a book fell into my hands entitled Proof of a Conspiracy by John Robison, which gives a full account of the Society of Freemasons that distinguishes itself by the name of Illuminati, whose plan is to overturn all government and all religion, even natural.
And who endeavor to eradicate every idea of a supreme being and distinguish man from beast by his shape only?
A thought suggested itself to me that some of the lodges in the United States might have caught the infection and might cooperate with the Illuminati or the Jacobin Club in France.
Fauché is mentioned by Robison as a zealous member.
And who can doubt of Gannett and Adet?
Adet, probably.
Have not those, their confidence in this, confidants in this country?
They use the same expressions and are generally men of no religion.
Upon serious reflection, I was led to think that it might be within your power to prevent the horrid plan from corrupting the brethren.
unidentified
And that's why he was bled to death by the Illuminati.
dan friesen
So, George Washington replied...
jordan holmes
It seems like I kind of...
The Illuminati he's describing?
I think they're right.
I think they're dead on.
dan friesen
Well, Adam Weishaupt and that whole Illuminati thing.
jordan holmes
I'm glad they killed Washington.
dan friesen
The Bavarian Illuminati existed from 1776 to 1785.
Right.
Was disbanded, but everybody's like, oh no, they secretly weren't disbanded.
unidentified
Ugh.
Oh boy.
dan friesen
All this nonsense.
jordan holmes
Knights Templar!
dan friesen
And mostly all they seemed to be interested in was, like, rationality over superstition and that shit.
jordan holmes
Yeah, exactly.
dan friesen
But be that as it may, every other account of all this stuff is wildly ahistorical.
jordan holmes
Okay, okay.
dan friesen
But George Washington did reply to his letter.
On September 25th, 1798, he wrote back, Dearest Martha, the Illuminati are stealing my blood.
Please, stop the Illuminati from sending me letters that take my blood magically.
So, he writes, And the book was dumped.
So he also had a terrible fever a year before he died.
And which allows me to add a little more now than thanks for your kind wishes and favorable sentiments.
Except to correct an error you have run into of my presiding over the English lodges of this country.
The fact is, I preside over none, nor have I ever been in one more than once or twice within the last 30 years.
I believe, notwithstanding, that none of the lodges in this country are contaminated with the principles ascribed to the Society of the Illuminati.
With respect, I am yours, your humble servant, George.
unidentified
So, from that we can conclude.
jordan holmes
George Washington.
Ran the Illuminati.
dan friesen
He did not.
jordan holmes
He denied it.
He denied it.
Clearly that means that he was running it.
dan friesen
You're using the Alex logic and I don't appreciate it.
jordan holmes
It's clearly what it means.
dan friesen
So he wasn't killed by the Illuminati and the letters that he wrote.
jordan holmes
He was the Illuminati.
dan friesen
The letters that he wrote regarding the Illuminati, what he says there is, I have heard of this stuff, which I could say too.
That's not confirmation that the Illuminati fucking exists in any meaningful way, especially not in 1798, 1799.
jordan holmes
You're denying it right now.
dan friesen
Yes, I am.
In as much as these fucking dillweeds present it.
Anyway, the clip isn't over.
jordan holmes
Uh-huh.
dan friesen
But that is important that we now have...
jordan holmes
We got Washington on record as saying, fucking fuck the Illuminati.
dan friesen
It's more like, come on.
unidentified
Yeah.
dan friesen
Come on, man.
Like, first of all, I'm not head of any lodge.
No.
I haven't even been to any, really, ever.
jordan holmes
Guys, not a mason.
dan friesen
And, look, they're not.
Calm down.
jordan holmes
Come on.
dan friesen
It's more or less a letter that says...
Calm down.
jordan holmes
How do you get the president to write you a letter saying, shut up about the Illuminati?
dan friesen
I think he was sending a lot of letters back then.
From one of the other letters that he wrote back to the guy, he's like, it takes up a lot of my time writing back to people.
jordan holmes
That's true.
They didn't have TV back then, so might as well write letters.
alex jones
Through the lore of places like the Lone Star State.
dan friesen
So again, he's just reiterating that...
He gets all his information from lore.
Not facts.
alex jones
To defend the republic till the end.
The state meant to be a redoubt in the future if the enemy was able to take over the rest of the country.
These covert wars have been going on since before this country was founded.
jordan holmes
When did they start?
alex jones
And these are the type of secrets you learn if you're in the right lodge and a 33rd degree mason.
unidentified
Yep.
alex jones
It's not the secrets of Solomon's temple.
jordan holmes
He was dead back then.
alex jones
So I'm going to get into the big news that this Bundy tragedy distracts from.
dan friesen
Spoiler alert, it's Benghazi.
jordan holmes
Yep, yep, yep.
Nope, makes perfect sense.
dan friesen
So...
jordan holmes
So, lore.
dan friesen
Lore.
jordan holmes
The podcast by, uh, what's-his-face?
dan friesen
I don't know.
The Lone Star State is meant to be a redoubt.
jordan holmes
Yep.
dan friesen
In case these evil forces take over the rest of the country.
unidentified
Right.
dan friesen
Which sounds to me like lore.
It also sounds to me like the grandiosity of people who are nationalistic about their state, which Texas certainly is.
jordan holmes
Never heard that before.
dan friesen
No, but I mean, you get similar variations of it from people in New York, too.
Like, they have real overblown senses of themselves just by virtue of being born in or living in New York.
jordan holmes
I love his long pauses because it's clear that he's like, he's...
Grabbing at whatever.
dan friesen
No, bullshit.
jordan holmes
33rd degree basically.
Sure, sure, sure.
33rd degree.
dan friesen
I disagree with you.
jordan holmes
Okay.
dan friesen
I think that what happened there is that he was like, oh no.
jordan holmes
Ratcheting up dramatic tension?
dan friesen
No, no, no.
He was like, oh no.
People are going to think I just admitted to being a Mason.
I think that's what happened.
unidentified
Okay.
dan friesen
Because he's like, that's the lore you hear when you're in the right lodges.
And a 33rd degree.
Whoops.
I'm not here to say that Alex Jones is a fucking mason, but I think that the pauses were his brain being like, I know how my audience thinks.
Damn it.
Damn it.
This is going to be a blog post.
Someone's going to try to break into my house.
jordan holmes
Somebody's going to write a goddamn letter to George Washington about this.
dan friesen
Dearest Martha, please go bleed Alex Jones.
He's looking puffy today.
Probably just hungover.
So, we've now gotten through serious problems with his ideas about history that he himself has ascribed to lore.
Which is a big problem.
jordan holmes
He's read all their books, but you know what's more important?
dan friesen
Lore.
So, at this point in the show, now, Alex Jones sort of gets back into a normal show.
jordan holmes
Right.
dan friesen
He gets to talking about some headlines.
jordan holmes
Until he drops that George Washington was a werewolf?
dan friesen
He also was a werewolf, yes, we do know that.
But he gets back into a normal show with normal-ish headlines, but you have to experience them a little bit differently.
After hearing those two clips, I believe, listen to this and see if you get the point I'm trying to make.
alex jones
Austrian record-holding athlete lashes out at idiotic refugee policies.
It's not idiotic.
They're bringing in martial law with it.
See, people keep saying they're idiotic.
No, they run things.
The globalists are totally evil.
You've got to admit that they're scientific, they've dominated us, they're on top of us, not, oh, they're crazy, because it makes you feel better about it.
That's the first step going there, and this is crazy.
Yeah, crazy like a fox.
You gotta get inside the enemy's mind or they're gonna beat you every time.
60% of refugees heading to Europe are economic migrants' top EU official.
jordan holmes
Not true.
alex jones
Yeah, they want free goodies and, you know, women.
I mean, in their country, women are just absolute property, so why not?
By the way, they've got the liberal German women out giving the Arab men roses and just saying, hey, baby, I'm here.
I'm sorry for our misogyny.
I'm sorry for our xenophobia.
Against your horrible Stone Age, you know, religion of making women wear beaky pursuits and sexually mutilating and killing a woman if a man rapes her.
And so, of course, the sickening anti-female, anti-family, devil feminists love it because they hate women.
They want you to abort your children.
They want you without a good man.
They want you to hate your sons if you do have them.
They're just eugenicists, high priestesses.
So, of course, they go to the Islamic, you know, caliphate slavers and just hit their knees because they love cancer.
They love death.
They love failure.
They hate the West.
They hate the new Atlantis.
They want to blow it up.
Absolutely overrun by demons, ladies and gentlemen.
dan friesen
So, I don't think it's possible to not hear those words through new ears.
jordan holmes
And say they're coming for Texas.
dan friesen
Well, Texas is the redoubt.
But, you know, he conceives of this as centuries-long fights between religious factions.
unidentified
Yeah.
dan friesen
This is insanity.
To the point where he misrepresents literally every piece of history that he tries to ascribe to anything.
I don't...
No.
jordan holmes
It kind of feels like he still thinks we're fighting in the Crusades.
dan friesen
I think he does.
unidentified
Yeah.
dan friesen
I think he does.
jordan holmes
I mean, it feels like he goes back that far.
It's like, the Knights Templar were actually my great-great-great-great-great-grandfathers, and then they fucked until we got Travis.
Travis knew my family.
I'm Confederate royalty.
I'm a Knight Templar.
dan friesen
I did find that letter he references.
Like, if Alex is related to the Ayerses, then that is true.
But I don't know if he's related to that family at all through his mom's side.
I have no idea.
But that letter does exist where...
jordan holmes
Confederate royalty.
dan friesen
Colonel Travis does say, take care of my boy.
But even in that letter, he says, I might make it.
I could make it.
But the thing is, this friction that he sees and this idea that we're being overrun with these false immigrants and it's some sort of a plan to destroy the new Atlantis, That's a piece of this bigger stuff.
And that bigger stuff is straight up, like, fucking lore.
It's straight up fan fiction that people have written about history to try and explain some very difficult things throughout history.
It's a convenient excuse for why things have happened.
Additionally, it's a convenient excuse if you're trying to scapegoat Jews repeatedly throughout history.
Those sorts of things.
Or even take Jews out of it, your political opponents.
jordan holmes
Right.
dan friesen
Like, those sorts of easy scapegoat tricks are what you see historically throughout the history of the Illuminati lore.
And Alex believes all of it.
He's making it clear he believes all of it.
And he believes that that's what he thinks the deep state stuff is.
I'm so not surprised he loves Trump now.
If I'd heard that clip much earlier, I think that I could have pieced a little bit together.
jordan holmes
Is Trump an Illuminati guy?
I know he's an anti-Semite, but I didn't know if he was an Illuminati guy.
dan friesen
I have no idea.
I think he's too savvy to say something like that in public.
That unpacking would be much worse than the shithole countries comment.
jordan holmes
He would pay more than $130,000 to keep that quiet.
dan friesen
In the same way that Alex Jones sees Colonel William Travis in himself and has created his own mythology mirroring Colonel Travis is.
I think he sees Trump in there, too.
Because the way he portrays Trump as being up against it, nothing but enemies around.
He's stuck.
He's creating the Alamo around Trump.
jordan holmes
Right, but at the same time, it's just more...
I mean, you could say that, but I think it's probably more just a situation where it's like, the more enemies Trump accrues, The more he likes Trump.
Like, he just has to double down.
dan friesen
To some extent.
jordan holmes
Every enemy only makes him like Trump more, simply because that puts him back in the outsider position that we know he loves so much.
Like, if a lot of people loved Trump...
dan friesen
Or the person who knows he's up against it and has no chance of coming out alive like he believes Colonel Travis was, and still goes and marches to his duty.
When in reality, if you look at the history, Colonel Travis was like, I don't want to do this.
jordan holmes
Right.
So that is a lot like Trump, then.
dan friesen
Yeah, I guess so.
jordan holmes
Trump just kept bumbling upwards until he got to be president.
dan friesen
And look at the history of the debts that Colonel Travis has.
jordan holmes
Yeah, exactly.
dan friesen
Even more closely.
jordan holmes
Oh, yeah, absolutely.
dan friesen
So anyway, at this point, Alex goes through some headlines and has a shit prediction that we can look at scoffingly.
jordan holmes
Although we know that Trump wouldn't write a letter saying, take care of my boy.
He would write a letter saying, like...
Wait, I have kids?
dan friesen
Yeah, exactly.
jordan holmes
Hold on.
alex jones
Hillary Clinton drops below 50% nationally.
Now Obama is having Bernie Sanders to the White House signaling that they may just not use Biden.
They may use Sanders.
They may be offering him a VP slot with Biden.
Sure.
Wait for it.
Wait for it.
That's in the cards.
Or Elizabeth Warren and Biden.
Joe Biden.
Clinton needs to complain.
To Twitter, that co-founder, that Hillary mocking hashtag, he is pure misogyny.
See, criticizing the Lord and Savior is hating women.
dan friesen
It was Peter Dow.
I don't really care.
alex jones
Criticizing Obama, criticizing blacks.
We'll have to sit here and explain to women if she gets elected.
We're not against you.
The CIA ran Hillary and Miss Magazine.
We just want to stop her.
She's a tyrant.
Shut up.
The women are wetting.
You'll never stop us.
It's like Charlton Heston at the end of Omega Man.
I have the cure!
I want to free you!
Shut up!
They throw a spear into him.
Shut up!
We want to be like this!
There's chemicals in the water!
We want them!
jordan holmes
You don't get the metaphor of the Omega Man.
dan friesen
No, and at that point after he does that impression, long ass pause.
Real long pause.
jordan holmes
Does not understand.
I'm more frustrated about the Omega Man than I am about anything else that we've said so far tonight.
dan friesen
Well, I mean, if you look at what he's saying and the metaphor that he's making, he's like, I mean, first of all, the only way he understands the world is through movies, so there's that.
But then even beyond that, what he's saying is really, really insulting to women.
jordan holmes
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
dan friesen
Take away the fucking idea of any hashtag, anyone's complaints about it, but just the idea that they're, like, Women are so stupid.
They just love her because she's a woman and scream at me because I have the answer.
alex jones
Women are always going to win.
dan friesen
In his Omega Man metaphor, the I have the answer is women shut up.
jordan holmes
Right.
dan friesen
And they won't listen.
They won't listen.
I have the answer and it's stay in your place.
jordan holmes
But that's the problem that I have with his analysis of the Omega Man is that the point of the Omega Man was he's the monster.
dan friesen
Right.
jordan holmes
Not the zombies.
It's him.
He's the murderer.
He's the killer of these people.
So in that sense, I guess Alex does have the metaphor right.
Just in the wrong way.
Because Alex is the murderer.
dan friesen
So weirdly, every now and again, he is right unintentionally.
Maybe that's a good example of that.
jordan holmes
I have the answer, because I'm the monster.
Oh, somebody should have explained that movie to me.
dan friesen
Shit.
I need to stop drinking NyQuil before the movies.
jordan holmes
I only like the Vincent Price version.
dan friesen
I like the Will Smith version.
So in this next clip, Rambo Joe Biggs, Pizzagate Joe Biggs, pre-Pizzagate, comes in.
jordan holmes
Pizzagate.
dan friesen
Yeah, Pizzagate Biggs comes into studio because they need to talk about the Bundy situation.
And Biggs had been at the compound.
Really?
Yeah, he made a trip.
To the wildlife preserve.
jordan holmes
Of course he did.
Why am I surprised at that?
dan friesen
As I understand, to Bunkerville, to the original compound.
unidentified
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
dan friesen
And so Joe Biggs and Alex have a very interesting conversation.
jordan holmes
Did you know they're serving pizza at that fucking bird reserve?
I swear to God, we gotta investigate this shit.
He's really only had one story.
Everywhere he goes, it's pizza.
dan friesen
You gotta look at the menus.
jordan holmes
You gotta look at the pizza.
dan friesen
The menus at that wildlife preserve.
jordan holmes
I just like getting paid to eat pizza.
dan friesen
Everyone's gotta look into it for themselves.
Alex Jones says something preposterous about the Bundys.
joe biggs
So right off the bat, you can kind of tell that they were ready to demonize this, use this as maybe to set an example for what the government wanted to do to people like this, to so-called right-wingers who were going to go up and make a stand against the government because they did get beat back in Nevada when that happened with the standoff on the Bundy ramp.
alex jones
And we can roll some of that B-roll in the background.
It's historic feds.
Surrender.
Arm-fed surrender to citizens.
They were threatening to shoot David Knight at the front of it with a camera.
Sure.
They were in the wrong.
That would have been Lexington or Concord.
Shot heard around the world.
If they would have mowed down people with their guns, not up, but guns down, on horseback with American flags, that would have kicked off a revolution, and we might win that one.
But if a revolution kicks off in the wrong way and we shoot first, that gives the enemy home-field advantage and the toying costs to be receiving the kickoff.
dan friesen
Go ahead.
unidentified
I am willing to die for the revolution.
dan friesen
That's David Knight.
jordan holmes
Exactly.
On the scene.
They pointed a gun at David Knight.
unidentified
If they had killed David Knight, the whole world would have gone up in flames.
dan friesen
My man.
They could have won that revolution.
jordan holmes
Well, yeah, but we all knew that.
If they killed David Knight...
The Hicks win the revolution.
Everybody knows this.
dan friesen
Yeah, absolutely.
jordan holmes
This is just chess over monopoly over risk.
dan friesen
Yeah, exactly.
unidentified
It's clear.
jordan holmes
Makes perfect sense.
dan friesen
So now here is where we get into what I would describe as...
unidentified
I don't...
dan friesen
We're recording this on Martin Luther King Day, so this clip makes me uncomfortable.
alex jones
Great.
jordan holmes
That's why I'm so glad we didn't do today's episode.
I don't know if I can handle hearing more white people compare white people to Martin Luther King Jr.
I think I'm out on that.
dan friesen
I agree, I agree.
jordan holmes
I will say that Emon Bundy was the Martin Luther King Jr. of the Mormons.
dan friesen
In this next clip, don't bring up Martin Luther King, but this is so...
Fucking dog whistle racist.
It makes me, it hurts my ears, let's say.
joe biggs
Like I said, I've been a big supporter.
I've even spoke to Amon Bundy's mother before and things like that and had conversations with them.
I do believe that they have pure intentions that deep down inside they don't really have any ill intention whatsoever.
That what they were doing, they were truly trying to make another stand.
And I just, like I said, I thought this was just not at the right place.
You know, but then you have that left again coming out, which I don't get, saying white terror.
You know, you have all these people on Twitter coming out last night saying, oh, great, you know, these terrorists, these white terrorists are arrested.
Call them terrorists.
That's what they should be.
Well, sorry, you know.
And they're all the Black Lives Matters people.
alex jones
Well, I mean, they want a race war.
And they paint everything as racial.
And they also sit there and...
I mean, really, at the end of the day, what happened?
joe biggs
Martha and Tom didn't get to go into the wildlife refuge and work a few days a week.
I mean, there's probably hardly anybody out there really manning that place.
It's in the middle of nowhere.
Meanwhile, they quote-unquote break into this federal facility, and what do I see them doing when I'm down there?
Sweeping, cleaning off the sidewalks, taking care of the property, the land, making sure it's fine.
I didn't see anyone in Black Lives Matter and Ferguson break into a store and start doing shopkeep work and rearranging stuff.
No, they were taking stuff and running out and throwing Molotov cocktails.
unidentified
So, that is awful.
dan friesen
That is awful for a number of reasons.
First of all, Alex...
jordan holmes
So, if I understand correctly his reasoning, if I steal your TV, but when you see me with it, I'm dusting it off, well...
alex jones
Not a thief?
dan friesen
No.
alex jones
Not at all.
jordan holmes
I'm taking care of it.
dan friesen
No.
Or if I...
jordan holmes
Frankly, it's more mine now than it is yours.
dan friesen
If I have a bunch of guns and I occupy your home and I dust off your TV...
unidentified
Right, right.
jordan holmes
He's cleaning.
I'm cleaning it up.
I put salt on your sidewalk.
It's snowy out there, guys.
Look, I know I own your house now, but you're not going to slip and fall.
dan friesen
There's an amazing irony to Alex Jones being like, they want a race war.
They want to make everything racial.
And then Joe Biggs...
20 seconds later being like, I didn't see them cleaning up in Ferguson.
All these white people, they cleaned up.
Now, the reality of that is quite different.
I'm going to read here from an article in the Huffington Post.
jordan holmes
They fucking pooped everywhere.
dan friesen
They were disgusting.
They dug trenches full of poop.
The Malheward National Wildlife Refuge occupation ended more than a month ago, but yet damage caused by the armed militants who gathered to protest the federal government's management of public lands.
remains.
unidentified
The total cost of the occupation stands at about $6 million to the federal government, in addition to $3 million already pitched in by the state of Oregon.
dan friesen
Of that, Tom and Martha have a lot of back pay coming.
Jason Holm, assistant regional director of USFWS, says $1.7 million has been flagged just for repairs and cleaning of the reserve itself.
Home warned that nearly $2 million cleanup cost is a moving figure subject to change as the agency conducts a thorough inventory of what was broken and what's missing.
So here's where it gets really important.
So they made those buckets of poop and what have you.
And that's one thing.
A report released in February by the FBI said, quote, significant amounts of human feces were found on site after the occupier surrendered next to a sensitive cultural site containing artifacts sacred to the Burns-Puet tribe.
jordan holmes
Great.
dan friesen
So that, um...
jordan holmes
Boy!
Boy howdy!
Boy, howdy, is that a big, giant fucking metaphor right there.
If I saw that in a movie, I would be like, guys, bid on the nose.
dan friesen
Yeah.
Holmes said the wildlife refuge will recover eventually, but there's concern that the militia members may have harmed Native American artifacts or destroyed other records which are irreplaceable.
Nature is durable.
It'll be just fine, Holmes said.
Buildings and property are fixable or replaceable.
They'll be fine.
The relationships with the community will strengthen as a result of this.
However, damages to tribal artifacts would be heinous, and lost or missing biological data could be impossible to replicate.
Our refuge employees are thrilled to be back doing the job.
Blah, blah, blah.
We're thrilled and blah, blah, blah.
26 people were charged with federal.
jordan holmes
Now is a great time to remind everybody that they just got off.
Scott Free!
dan friesen
They did cause a lot of damage to sacred sites.
jordan holmes
That they will not have to pay for or do any criminal time for.
No jail time for them.
dan friesen
Nope.
And so to drive home the point that Alex Jones excuses all white behavior, here is a clip of him saying that pretty much all white terrorism is just the feds.
jordan holmes
Fair enough.
alex jones
There would be more feds at the meeting than there would be patriots, and the feds would have to have secret hand signs so they wouldn't set each other up.
unidentified
Of course.
alex jones
I mean, it's that bad, folks.
I've had them, no exaggeration, probably 30-plus times come up to me at a book signing, a video signing, an event and go, listen, I got C4 in my truck out there right now.
Let's go blow up the police station.
And I go, get the camera on, get the camera on.
This person's a cop.
And they run out and they got a cop car, you know, unmarked fed.
unidentified
And they'll go, I'll get you later, Jones!
dan friesen
I don't know about that.
jordan holmes
If true, we gotta hire some better cops.
That is a bad idea.
dan friesen
For real.
jordan holmes
As far as a honeypot goes, not a good one.
unidentified
Uh...
dan friesen
Yeah.
jordan holmes
Hey, Alex.
Let's go blow up a police station.
Oh, you caught me!
dan friesen
If you're living the kind of life where 30 times in your 20-year career someone has come up to you...
Real or not, and suggested you blow up a police station, you're not doing a good job.
You're in a bad line of work.
You're attracting the wrong crowd.
jordan holmes
You need a doctor.
Those people aren't real.
You just want to blow up a police station.
dan friesen
I'm deeply concerned now that any fan who runs into us on the streets now, that will be their code for I listen to the show.
Let's go blow up a police station.
I really hope that that doesn't...
jordan holmes
Guys, guys, put your phones in your freezer.
It's time to go blow up a police department.
dan friesen
It's a cop!
unidentified
It's a cop!
jordan holmes
Oh, no!
But get the camera on him!
dan friesen
If you're a cop or you're just playing a prank, I think you would probably run away if Alex Jones was like, get the camera on him, he's a cop.
unidentified
I think that doesn't prove they're cops.
dan friesen
I also don't think it happened 30 times, but be that as it may.
jordan holmes
Feds.
All of them.
dan friesen
At this point in the episode, Alex brings on his big CIA whistleblower, Tosh Plumlee.
jordan holmes
Tosh Plumlee.0.
dan friesen
Right.
And I don't care.
I don't really care.
But at a certain point...
jordan holmes
Which faction does Tosh belong to?
dan friesen
The 8th faction.
jordan holmes
The 8th faction?
dan friesen
I wasn't supposed to talk about this.
jordan holmes
The secret 8th faction?
God damn it, Dan.
dan friesen
All they do is...
jordan holmes
You only learn about that if you're a 33rd level mason.
dan friesen
All they do is blow up police stations with the help of minor radio personalities.
So, in his interview, though, there's one thing I wanted to play for you, because I think it's really interesting.
I think it's very, very interesting.
And if you listen to this closely, I think that it's Tosh Plumlee pointing a finger at Alex.
I don't know if that's the case.
jordan holmes
As if it's Alex's fault for these kinds of assholes doing this kind of shit.
dan friesen
No, I think he's subtly trying to be like, give a hint to the audience, or something like this.
I would say that I don't think I've heard Tosh Plumlee on the show in a long time.
And there may be, like, there might be a thing where he's like, I don't want to come on your show anymore.
I don't know.
I'm not entirely sure.
I don't have the statistics to back that up.
He might have been on two weeks ago and I just missed it.
unidentified
Sure.
dan friesen
Something like that.
But there are things that he's saying in this clip that are absolutely, like, I'm kind of talking about Alex.
unidentified
Yeah.
dan friesen
I think you'll pick up on it pretty quick.
jordan holmes
Okay.
alex jones
Wow.
You're so incredible.
Tell him about Illusionary Warfare Training.
unidentified
Well, that's what it is.
It's a modified technique that's been used since the 1950s.
Does it infiltrate in?
If you can control the communications, you've won the war or you've won the situation.
alex jones
That's right.
Usually the communications person that, quote, handles all communications for the group is who you look for.
unidentified
We've had Malkinburg.
That's an old CIA project.
Now, let me quantify something here on CIA.
There are people that is infiltrated within the CIA that are CIA, that some of the CIA do not even know it.
jordan holmes
The ninth faction.
unidentified
I'm not talking about rogues.
alex jones
No, they're shadow CIA.
unidentified
I'm talking about shadow warriors, you know, not from the standpoint of shadow warriors on organizations and things like that.
I'm talking about there is a shadow government out there that is working these programs.
The program is designed to desensitize us to where we expect exactly what the hell we're getting.
alex jones
Let's be clear.
The big foundations, the big leftist foundations, run but have the national security clearances, the clandestine, dirty programs against the patriots.
And so a lot of times the local police, the FBI, even the CIA don't know.
It's the foundations that are even above the agencies with their action program here in the United States.
unidentified
All right, let me put it this way, too.
You hit it right on the head, Alex.
jordan holmes
Sure!
unidentified
Also, there's gatekeepers assigned into these organizations, our agencies, that prevent good, honest people that work for those agencies from doing their job.
dan friesen
So, three things that were said within that clip are giant criticisms that are levied in the anti-Alex Jones online community.
jordan holmes
Okay.
dan friesen
Communications people are probably the most suspicious.
Alex Jones is the biggest mouthpiece of the patriot community.
He is the communications aspect of that entire operation.
And Alex seems to not understand what his own words implicate him in being like, yeah, you find the person who's in charge of communications.
That's your guy.
He's pointing the finger at himself.
So the second thing is the idea that Alex Jones desensitizes people to the situations that the powers that be want them to be desensitized to.
unidentified
Right.
jordan holmes
So they accept their circumstances.
dan friesen
So you have this idea of this overpowerful elite, these globalists who have their fingers in every pie.
They control all seven factions of the CIA.
jordan holmes
But not the secret 8th faction.
dan friesen
No, that's true, which Tosh Plumlee.0 is a part of.
So that idea of desensitizing you to this worldwide conspiracy that exists through ironclad pedophile blackmail that want to kill your children and drink their blood and all this stuff.
And all they're going to do is keep trying to fuck with you.
Making you depressed through the water.
The chemicals in the water.
The media is going to lie to you all the time.
There's going to be fake terrorists that are going to run you over with a car.
You're not safe in public.
This idea is...
jordan holmes
And you can't fight back against them except by giving me money.
dan friesen
And yelling at Muslims on the streets if you see them because that's good fun.
But like...
The idea that his role in the whole game plan is desensitizing people to be able to think, I can't fight back.
The way to fight back is through direct action, through protesting, through writing letters to your congresspeople, voting, all those sorts of things.
Those are...
Legitimate things you can do.
You can push for reform.
We are not past that point.
Alex Jones' role, according to a lot of his critics online, is that he is there to train you to think you don't have anything you can do.
jordan holmes
He's in the shadowy ninth faction of the CIA.
dan friesen
It's a trained hopelessness.
and stills in his audience.
Again, like you said, even as I was talking, the only thing you can do is give him money and support him.
The third thing in that one and a half minute clip of Tosh Plumlee's that is also one of the big...
Fingers that gets pointed at Alex Jones is that he is a gatekeeper and that he is in place so there is a flow of information the correct way.
I don't necessarily believe this because that implies that the globalists are real.
But that criticism that comes to him from...
These internet commenters is that the globalists are real and Alex is a limited hangout.
He's controlled opposition where he feeds you a little bit of truth and a lot of lies in order to make sure that you stay suckling off his teat as opposed to the real truth tellers in the world.
jordan holmes
He won't even come out and say that the Jews are at fault for all of our problems.
dan friesen
He kind of does.
unidentified
Yeah, well.
jordan holmes
But he won't come out and say it.
dan friesen
I'm not saying necessarily that Tosh Plumlee is wagging his dick at Alex, but there is...
It strikes me as amazing that there's three of the biggest criticisms of Alex within one minute and a half of them talking.
jordan holmes
Yeah, but that gets back to our, I know you are, but what am I?
But they're not doing that.
What they're doing is just accusing the opposition of whatever it is they think they're doing.
They're silly.
dan friesen
It's silly.
It's a little different than the general...
jordan holmes
Coming from Tosh Plumlee.0?
dan friesen
No.
Well, yeah.
Yeah, it is.
It is a little bit different.
I give it a little bit more of a pause to be like, why is he saying those things?
With Alex, it's just, of course, I'm rubber, you're glue.
But Tosh coming in and saying stuff like that just makes me think there's probably an intention behind it, and it's not just deflecting.
Because he doesn't have to do that.
jordan holmes
Right.
dan friesen
He has no skin in the game, necessarily.
jordan holmes
No, which is why he can just say, you hit the nail right on the head, Alex, and then say something completely different.
dan friesen
Well, that's what all his guests do.
unidentified
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
dan friesen
So anyway, here's a little bit of a commercial that I really enjoyed that Alex does for his product DNA Force.
jordan holmes
Great.
dan friesen
No ad pivot to speak of on this, but man, this is...
jordan holmes
Just going straight into...
dan friesen
This is a great commercial.
alex jones
Okay.
unidentified
Just the BioPQQ is $12,000 to $14,000 a kilo from...
alex jones
The Japanese, who make it right here in America.
In Japan, they've been obsessed with it for 20 years.
And of course, they're the longest-lived people there are for a lot of other reasons.
The point is, DNA force is hardcore.
Just the BioPQQ has the equivalent vitamin C delivery in the body.
It's different, but it's basically the same.
Read the science.
Of 300 pounds of blueberries.
Is that a lot?
Is that a little?
You can't really overdose on it, but it can make you sick.
BiopQQ, one pill, 300 pounds of blueberries.
I don't get that!
Is that good?
I remember about five years ago, my dad was going to medical doctors.
So many blueberries.
He'd done some stuff at the Pentagon trying to get things fast-tracked, nutraceuticals separately from working with me now.
And he said, this is what you need to do.
Because he goes, they're going to try to ban this here in the U.S. Probably.
Or make a prescription.
He goes, this is $300 to $600 for something.
And so we made our own formula.
And believe me, it's got the industry actually upset.
All blueberries.
Because people go to medical doctors and pay $300 for something like this.
And ours is better.
So, Infowarslife.com.
dan friesen
I found a comparable product for $50.
But be that as it may.
jordan holmes
I just saw the best infomercial ever.
If we're talking as seen on TV products, this is the perfect time to be like...
Have you ever been eating 300 pounds of blueberries and you're like, who has the time?
My mouth is blue!
dan friesen
And they just show a B-roll from Wonka.
jordan holmes
Or just some woman holding 300 pounds of blueberries going, slipping and falling everywhere.
dan friesen
How many times have you been in this situation?
jordan holmes
How many times have you held 300 pounds of blueberries?
I can't even afford it!
dan friesen
It's insane.
One of the things, when I was looking into this, I don't care about the blueberry situation, but...
And I find myself saying that all the time.
jordan holmes
Do you mean the band, the blueberry situation?
dan friesen
No, but also rest in peace cranberries.
jordan holmes
Yes, true.
dan friesen
But be that as it may, the difference between Alex's products and other products is in the...
jordan holmes
Blueberry tonnage.
dan friesen
No, the nutrition information.
What you find is that Alex Jones...
Always has on the back of the bottle proprietary blend and then whatever amount and it says the things that are in it but it doesn't say how much.
jordan holmes
Because it's a proprietary blend.
dan friesen
It's all blended together.
jordan holmes
So he doesn't have to...
Gotcha.
He just lists the ingredients.
He doesn't give you an actual idea of percentage.
dan friesen
Of how much is in it.
unidentified
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
dan friesen
And so you find a comparable product that another company puts out, and they'll give you specifics.
unidentified
Yeah.
dan friesen
They'll give you all the actual amount.
How much BioPQQ is in it?
Because he's saying it costs $14,000 a kilo or whatever.
And that could be enough to go six years.
jordan holmes
Let's take a look at this.
dan friesen
There's something like that.
jordan holmes
Hold on one second.
There is 25% of your daily allotted vitamin C in this?
Right.
How many pounds of blueberries is that?
dan friesen
He's pretending somehow it's...
jordan holmes
Is that 10 pounds of blueberries?
dan friesen
He says it's absorbed the same but different.
jordan holmes
But different!
I don't know what that is!
dan friesen
It's nothing.
So in this next clip, Alex Jones has another weirdo guest, a guy by the name of Joel Skousen.
Who picks blueberries.
He's a mess.
Hate this guy.
jordan holmes
I can't get off this blueberry thing.
I want to measure everything in pounds of blueberries now.
I want to know how much, in a bowl of cereal, how many pounds of blueberries are there?
dan friesen
I mean, it depends.
I mean, is it honey bunches of oats with blueberries?
jordan holmes
No, I was going to go with blueberries.
dan friesen
There's zero.
jordan holmes
There's zero blueberries?
dan friesen
Zero blueberries?
jordan holmes
Zero pounds of blueberries?
dan friesen
However, in BioPQQ, a lot of blueberries.
So, Joe Skousen comes on, and he...
I hate him.
I don't want to talk about his history or anything like that, because I'm going to take him down...
jordan holmes
He's just a dick.
dan friesen
I'm going to take him down a little bit later in a much more thorough way, but in this clip, he basically just rewrites what happened with the shooting of Lavoie Finnicum, and gives him a real generous take.
I wonder why.
unidentified
Finnicum.
joel skousen
Who's a very mild-mannered, grandfatherly type, well-spoken Mormon.
unidentified
He's a good...
dan friesen
So already, well-spoken, grandfatherly type, Mormon, good man.
jordan holmes
Good religious man.
joel skousen
It's a shame that he's the one that got shot.
I mean, this guy was taking the higher ground.
jordan holmes
He was not.
joel skousen
You know, there's conflicted reports about what happened when he got out of the car, but clearly he was not armed.
unidentified
His hands were in the air.
jordan holmes
And it's true that he may have been fed up.
joel skousen
You know, one of the witnesses in talking to Bundy's bodyguard said that he rushed the officers, but I don't think that's really what happened.
unidentified
What I think was, in his anger, saying, look, if you're going to kill me, then go ahead and shoot.
joel skousen
And he was, you know, walking forward to them, basically bearing his chest to them with his hands.
jordan holmes
With a gun.
joel skousen
But there's no justification for the police, the FBI, or whoever it was, to shoot him in the head when his hands are near.
unidentified
I don't care if you're walking towards him.
dan friesen
Absolutely.
Beyond that, let's pretend he wasn't armed.
jordan holmes
Okay.
dan friesen
Let's pretend he wasn't armed.
jordan holmes
Right.
dan friesen
Which is not true.
jordan holmes
Now, admittedly, Bundy's bodyguards did say he was angry and he rushed the cops, but with no information at all...
I don't think that's what happened.
dan friesen
Let's pretend that he wasn't armed, and Joel Skousen's situation is right.
jordan holmes
Okay.
dan friesen
Now, let's imagine a situation where he's not white.
jordan holmes
No, we already know.
dan friesen
No, no, no, no, no.
But let's imagine the situation where, just by Joel Skousen's words, that he was fed up, and he said, shoot me, and he was walking towards the police, baring his chest, and they told him to stop walking, and he kept walking towards them.
There's no way Alex Jones would ever give any kind of a pass.
jordan holmes
No, of course not.
dan friesen
For this sort of thing.
jordan holmes
No, no, no.
dan friesen
And the idea that Joel Skousen is just like, what I think happened.
jordan holmes
Yeah, I know.
That was bananas.
dan friesen
That's terrible analysis.
unidentified
No.
jordan holmes
I don't think that's what happened.
unidentified
No.
jordan holmes
No, it's that simple.
dan friesen
You don't get to do that.
jordan holmes
No, no, no.
The guys who were on his side, who were there, reported what happened.
I don't think they know what they're talking about.
dan friesen
No, I think he was cool.
jordan holmes
I don't think so.
dan friesen
I think he was a cool guy.
jordan holmes
Nah, I don't think they know what they're talking about.
dan friesen
He is a cool guy.
jordan holmes
He had his hands up now, admittedly.
One was in his pocket reaching for a pistol.
That's true.
But I think if you're a grandfatherly type, well-spoken guy, who wouldn't pull a pistol on the cops, right?
Who amongst us grandfatherly white people wouldn't just pull a pistol?
dan friesen
To not grow things on land.
Yeah.
unidentified
And then get $100,000 a year from a charity to have a bunch of foster kids.
dan friesen
Right.
unidentified
When I have 15 of my own children.
dan friesen
Right.
unidentified
Crazy.
dan friesen
Anyway, we have one more clip, Jordan.
And this is where Alex Jones goes through.
I wanted to leave this episode because it's been a little bit heavy on me.
Poking massive holes in his historical beliefs.
jordan holmes
Right.
dan friesen
And I wanted to leave with a good example of how he covers news.
I know we hear little clips from time to time of him like...
jordan holmes
I'm sorry.
You said news?
What you should have said was lore of the day.
dan friesen
Headlines is the lore of the day.
jordan holmes
Lore du jour.
dan friesen
And this is him riffing through the headlines.
Enjoy.
alex jones
U.S. destabilize Europe.
Austrian.
dan friesen
I just want to be clear.
Also, keep in mind, this is the exact same headlines that he didn't get into the actual stories of earlier.
He's on repeats.
alex jones
Record-holding athlete lashes out.
Absolutely, that's the plan.
60% of refugees heading to Europe are economic migrants.
EU official.
Feminized males will allow Muslims to conquer Europe.
jordan holmes
Sounds right.
dan friesen
Again, it's the strategy of repetition with no analysis.
No discussion of whether or not these things I'm saying are true or what the context of these things are.
Just repetition so you believe it.
It's beat into your head.
jordan holmes
Right.
dan friesen
Be afraid.
jordan holmes
Putting estrogen in the water attracts bears.
dan friesen
And bees.
I hate bees.
alex jones
Absolutely.
They love it.
They love to get beat up while their girlfriend gets drug off and gang raped and then hood put on her head and the police just hail it.
They just, oh, they love it.
It's a symbol of conquering Europe by the state that hates its slaves, hates its minions, and just wants to slap them around because there's nothing they won't put up with, nothing they don't love, no amount of humiliation they don't want.
Top Bilderberg, global super elite must stop Donald Trump.
Infowars.com.
Very important article.
Hillary Clinton drops low 50% nationally, even in stage polls.
Clintonista complains to Twitter that co-founder that Hillary mocking hashtag is pure misogyny, wants banning Hillary to be done.
dan friesen
All the same stories.
alex jones
Lena Dunham, some trendy actress, wants to tell the media what they can write about Hillary.
I mean, these people are just flaming out of control.
dan friesen
People on the left don't like Lena Dunham either.
jordan holmes
No.
dan friesen
Bad example.
jordan holmes
I looked up what Lena Dunham said and I shouldn't have.
alex jones
Ugly, dumb tyrants.
But it doesn't matter.
We fall and worship them and do whatever they say.
Rolling over on our backs like a puppy.
Just in total fear.
Because we love it!
We love it!
Land of the cowards!
Home of the slaves!
Land of the idiots!
Just groveling, loving every minute of it.
unidentified
It just goes on and on and on and on and on and on.
alex jones
Really, there's a certain percentage that's like that.
A big percentage, though, really, really hates the government.
CBS News poll, government is just hated more than organized crime, because it is organized crime, at the top.
jordan holmes
Nice.
alex jones
Main governor, Paul LePage, bring back the guillotine for drug traffickers.
Oh, like the CIA and all big banks that publicly run it all?
I just love these anti-drug people.
jordan holmes
Fake almost laugh.
alex jones
Everybody knows who brings the drugs in.
They want to keep it illegal to keep the prices up.
dan friesen
He delivered that line right there as if it's an old-time catchphrase.
unidentified
They keep it illegal to keep the prices up.
dan friesen
Almost as if it's a call and response.
On his farewell tour, you be the audience.
Yeah, they keep it illegal.
jordan holmes
So keep the prices up.
dan friesen
Thank you.
It's been great.
unidentified
All right.
Hey!
Hey!
alex jones
Give me a break.
City demands firearms applicants write essays explaining the need for a gun, and they, of course, refuse most of them.
dan friesen
Where's the evidence of that, Alex?
jordan holmes
Hamburger essays are not people who buy guns as a strong point.
dan friesen
And also, where is the...
You got statistics on rejections of these essays that I'm sure are just part of...
I don't know.
Just like a formality.
Just write something.
jordan holmes
If you write an essay that would score you 300 on the written SAT, we'll give you a gun.
dan friesen
If you can avoid saying, I want to don't kill somebody, then you get a gun.
alex jones
But nobody wants your guns, folks.
Monsanto sues the blocked listing of herbicide ingredient as a carcinogen.
dan friesen
Well, it's because studies came out that showed that glyphosate is not a carcinogen.
Or, at very least, it's in the lowest category possible in terms of potential carcinogens.
jordan holmes
Yeah, I don't want to defend Monsanto, though.
Neither do I. They can all burn in hell.
dan friesen
No, totally, but this is a misrepresentation of facts, and Alex can't handle it.
alex jones
On and on and on.
dan friesen
At this point, he has run out of stories.
jordan holmes
Yes.
All the paper's gone.
alex jones
I'm going to hand the baton to Jakari and Leanne now.
But before I do that, I wanted to just remind everybody one more time today that we're running the biggest special ever on DNA Force.
jordan holmes
That one was lame.
alex jones
Saw that coming.
dan friesen
Yeah, of course it was.
jordan holmes
Saw that one coming.
dan friesen
But it's still...
jordan holmes
Too easy.
dan friesen
It still happened.
jordan holmes
Do you know who is trying to keep us from getting good ad pivots?
dan friesen
Big Blueberry?
jordan holmes
Nope.
Rosicrucian cults.
dan friesen
Dude, that's another thing that I was thinking about.
I know a little bit about the Rosicrucians, and one of the things, I think that in terms of, when we talk about Alex Jones' Christianity, or lack thereof, or weird version thereof, I think that I've been too focused on straight-up Gnosticism.
I think that some of those ideas about living on through your children might come from Rosicrucian beliefs.
Because they're big into reincarnation and perfection of the soul through repetition and stuff like that.
So I think that that might be...
Alex might subscribe not only to dumb lore...
unidentified
Right.
dan friesen
About history.
He might also have, like, Rosicrucian Christian beliefs.
jordan holmes
Dumb religion as well.
dan friesen
I don't actually think the Rosicrucians are all that dumb.
They're pretty interesting, quite frankly.
But Alex is dumb.
jordan holmes
Those two are not mutually exclusive.
dan friesen
Alex is dumb, so it becomes dumb through him.
unidentified
True.
dan friesen
He is a vessel wherein the interesting becomes stupid.
And that's the best sentence I've ever written.
jordan holmes
Yeah, I know.
You just nailed it.
dan friesen
So yeah, that's the show.
jordan holmes
That's the show?
dan friesen
That's his January...
What is that?
January 27th, 2016.
Yep.
Beautiful.
So, also, just to give you a little bit of context, this is after he has decided to join Team Trump.
This is after our investigation.
Of course.
Rest in peace, Lavoie Finicum.
It is sad that anybody had to die, but at the same time...
unidentified
Nah, fuck them.
dan friesen
I used to feel bad for the 15 kids.
jordan holmes
No, wasn't it Amon Bundy who had the, or Cliven Bundy who had the 15 kids?
It was that guy who...
dan friesen
Lavoie had 15 kids.
jordan holmes
He had 15 kids and he was the one who adopted all of those kids so he could siphon money from the government?
dan friesen
According to the site I saw earlier today, yes, that is absolutely the case.
jordan holmes
What a welfare queen.
dan friesen
Yeah, oh, I forgot to play the Out of Context drop.
jordan holmes
Oh!
dan friesen
Which is just as fun afterwards as it would have been beforehand.
And here you go.
alex jones
Yeah, folks, I'm psychic.
I mean, it's a fact, okay?
I mean, I don't control it.
Nobody can.
But, I mean, I knew something.
I just feel it.
I said, something bad's about to happen.
You notice it did.
dan friesen
Okay.
jordan holmes
I thought he was just gonna be...
I thought he was being sarcastic of like, yeah, yeah, yeah, sure, I'm psychic.
And instead he turns into the...
No, of course I'm psychic.
dan friesen
I can't control it.
jordan holmes
I can't control it, though.
dan friesen
Yep, absolutely.
What a dum-dum.
Anyway, guys, if you'd like more of the show, you can check us out at knowledgefight.com.
Also, if you want to see too much of the show...
jordan holmes
With an amazing opener, Nate Burrows, who...
dan friesen
One of the best.
jordan holmes
You know what?
If you don't like our show...
Come for the first ten minutes.
Still pretty good.
dan friesen
Come enjoy some Nate Burroughs.
jordan holmes
It'd be interesting to see people listening to this podcast and being like, you know what?
I don't like their show, but Nate Burroughs is fucking great.
dan friesen
Let's be polite and sit through here.
Yeah, that will be Saturday.
Saturday, Saturday.
jordan holmes
January 20th at 10.30pm.
dan friesen
At the Playground Theater.
Please come if you can.
jordan holmes
www.theplaygroundtheater.com Absolutely.
dan friesen
We'll put up a link.
Also, we're on Twitter.
Knowledge underscore fight.
jordan holmes
That's true.
dan friesen
On Facebook.
jordan holmes
You can look us up on the iTunes.
dan friesen
We live there.
jordan holmes
Absolutely.
dan friesen
Beyond that.
jordan holmes
I don't know.
You know what?
I think I have the perfect.
I have the perfect one.
dan friesen
I think we should call Matt Drufke so he can give one.
jordan holmes
Ooh, that would be nice.
dan friesen
Because Garbage Dick.
Not Garbage Dick, that's our friend.
Trash Dick.
Trash Dick Joe Walsh.
Names are way too close.
jordan holmes
Right, right, right.
dan friesen
Trash Dick Joe Walsh is being a real asshole.
jordan holmes
Garbage Dick, great guy.
Trash dick, the fucking worst.
So then I think that means...
dan friesen
In honor of Drufki, I'd like to...
jordan holmes
Absolutely.
dan friesen
But you're entitled to yours as well.
jordan holmes
No, no, no.
Who cares?
unidentified
Come on.
jordan holmes
No, no, no.
I don't care.
It's just going to be one of the Bundys.
Who cares?
dan friesen
All right, fine.
They can all live in that bundle of go fuck yourself.
alex jones
Andy in Kansas, you're on the air.
Thanks for holding.
unidentified
Hello, Alex.
jordan holmes
I'm a first-time caller.
unidentified
I'm a huge fan.
I love your work.
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