March 27, 2024 - The Joe Rogan Experience
02:31:52
Participants
| 
| Speaker | Time | Text |
|---|---|---|
|
unidentified
|
Joe Rogan Podcast, check it out! | |
| The Joe Rogan Experience. | ||
| Train by day, Joe Rogan Podcast by night, all day. | ||
| I don't want to try to do you dirty, Donnell. | ||
| Don't do that, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Don't do that, man. | |
| Don't start with that. | ||
| Birds flying high. | ||
| You know how I feel. | ||
| They tried to do you dirty. | ||
| You know how I feel. | ||
| It's a new day. | ||
| It's a new dawn. | ||
| They tried to label you. | ||
| It's a new life for me, and I'm feeling good. | ||
| You look good. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Thank you. | |
| You look real good. | ||
| Where'd you get that suit? | ||
| Who made that suit for you? | ||
| La Catino out of Brooklyn is some Korean tailors that I've been working with for the last two years. | ||
| Nice. | ||
| And they're trying to make me go from Ashley to Clancy, and it's a new day. | ||
| I think it looks great. | ||
| And another thing you don't know about this suit, Joe, I smell as good as this suit looks. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| What are you using for smell? | ||
| What is it called? | ||
| Portrait of a Lady. | ||
| It's an Arabic company. | ||
| That's all I know. | ||
| And I got a guy that outsources my colognes. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What do you do? | |
| Like a little here, a little here, and a little on the wrists? | ||
| How you do it? | ||
| But do you spray it and walk through it? | ||
| That's cool. | ||
| I spray it, walk through it, and then I... I do that an anointed mouth like, okay, we get it. | ||
| You got some nice cologne on right now. | ||
| But it's good to be here. | ||
| There's something nice about a nice suit, man. | ||
| It does make you look... | ||
| It makes you work on your posture. | ||
| And one thing I did, another thing that I came here today, and it was my intent, Joe, to break all the stereotypes. | ||
| So I got here 20 minutes earlier. | ||
| Then I was supposed to be here. | ||
| You can't join me as late. | ||
| You're in force materials type. | ||
| And I wore a suit without a court date, without a funeral, and without a marriage proceeding. | ||
| So this is the whole thing of Donnell in a new day and changing his life. | ||
| I'm going through a transition. | ||
| What motivated this? | ||
| Law& Order? | ||
| No. | ||
| Law& Order didn't motivate this. | ||
| Law& Order, first off, Law& Order is one of the most respected franchises in the history of television. | ||
| It's been around a long time. | ||
| Shout out to... | ||
| Shout out to Ice-T. Shout out to Dick Wolf, and shout out to everybody that's a part of that. | ||
| And they say in New York, they say that you can't call yourself an actor That makes sense. | ||
| I mean, how many versions do they have? | ||
| I've been in every... | ||
| When I first began in my career, people really thought I was a dramatic actor more than a comic. | ||
| I was booking a lot of stuff. | ||
| I've been on every one of the episodes, not episodes, or shows, and out of them, I think 80% of them, I was arrested. | ||
| And I was like, wait a minute. | ||
| Am I getting typecast? | ||
| Every time I was able to play action, I'm like this. | ||
| And what'd I do? | ||
| What'd I do this time? | ||
| Every one. | ||
| Every one of them, I got arrested for something. | ||
| How many of them are there? | ||
| How many law and orders are there, Jamie? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Intent. | |
| Special victims. | ||
| Special victims. | ||
| I'm gonna say, I'm gonna guess, I'm gonna say five. | ||
| Five different Law& Orders. | ||
| Homicide was technically part of it too. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| Oh wait, no, this is related, never mind, hold on. | ||
| You got Law& Order, Special Victims Unit. | ||
| Two. | ||
| Organized Crime. | ||
| Three. | ||
| Adaptive series, Law& Order Toronto, Criminal Intent, Law& Order, Criminal Intent, Trial by Jury, LA, True Crime, Hate Crimes. | ||
| Oh, this is in development. | ||
| Hate Crimes for the defense. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They're going to have a whole show dedicated to hate crimes. | |
| But that brand is like, and I don't think those guys, I mean, Dick Wolf and Arthur Formy, when I first, I did it years ago, when I first did it, Arthur Formy was the director when I did it. | ||
| And that was like, I think like in 2000. And then recently, people love to watch those shows where they get the bad guy. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You have to catch the bad guy. | ||
| And you have to have a bad guy. | ||
| You have to have a bad guy and you gotta catch him. | ||
| But everybody is more interested in the bad guy more than anything. | ||
| That's in life in general. | ||
| That's why you find so many people that necessarily don't have a lot of talent but they subscribe to the bad guy side of it and want to be negative and then everybody draws to that. | ||
| The bad guy is winning like a motherfucker. | ||
| The bad guy is winning. | ||
| No way. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| In what way? | ||
| I'll just say like this, and I'm not being specific to anybody in general, even in the world of podcasts right now, the model for a lot of people now is like, Say some outlandish shit. | ||
| Say some shit that's going to piss somebody off. | ||
| Say some shit that's going to make people hate you. | ||
| And now you have a platform. | ||
| And you have a successful platform because at the end of the day, with this, it's all about engagement. | ||
| It's all about can you get people to engage? | ||
| And at the end of the day, if you can do that, whether people like you or not, you win. | ||
| Sort of. | ||
| But I think people get tired of that. | ||
| They get tired of conflict. | ||
| If your whole business is conflict, people don't want to be in conflict all the time. | ||
| And they realize that a lot of conflict is unnecessary. | ||
| And if you're the type of person that likes to talk about conflict constantly and talk about it online, you probably also are willingly participating in it, maybe a little too willingly. | ||
| Like maybe you're getting... | ||
| You know, you're creating problems, creating problems in your own life, even as you get attention. | ||
| Like, be careful what you wish for. | ||
| Because if you're known for just talking shit about people, and then you become successful, then people are going to talk shit about you. | ||
| They're all going to come after you. | ||
| Yeah, but the people that like that, they don't have a conscience to even care about that. | ||
| Yeah, but everybody has a conscience. | ||
| I just think we accept a certain amount of bullshit. | ||
| We accept it. | ||
| And I think you should just concentrate on doing whatever the fuck you do well. | ||
| You don't have to just say outlandish shit and be so negative. | ||
| I just don't think it's necessary. | ||
| You don't, but you are living in a different world than black Twitter. | ||
| It does work. | ||
| It gets people's attention. | ||
| The people you're speaking to? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| But black Twitter? | ||
| I get it. | ||
| And on these urban sites? | ||
| Yeah, you could be negative for years and years and years and years and years and a motherfucker will come up and that's the truth. | ||
| You're around a world of, oh, he's a jolly good fellow. | ||
| But in that dark world, in that black Twitter world, it's a lot, lot of negativity. | ||
| And it's very unfortunate. | ||
| That is unfortunate. | ||
| That's a very unfortunate thing. | ||
| I don't enjoy that. | ||
| Black Twitter? | ||
| No. | ||
| Insulting people. | ||
| Getting mad at people. | ||
| At a certain point in your life, I realized that there's no room for that in life. | ||
| You don't have to. | ||
| You can avoid it for the most part. | ||
| If you could avoid it in your immediate life, you could probably avoid it in your internet life too. | ||
| I think you avoid that conflict and negative energy the more successful you become. | ||
| Because I think that creates a I-don't-give-a-fuck-about-bullshit attitude. | ||
| I think a lot of the anger and a lot of frustration that comes with a lot of people is the beginning of the stage. | ||
| We were talking about it earlier. | ||
| Damn it. | ||
| Fuck. | ||
| You gave me that joint too quick. | ||
| You gave me that motherfucking joint too quick. | ||
| We were talking... | ||
|
unidentified
|
This is a bad one. | |
| Yeah. | ||
| Because I tried to get that pause to get my thought back. | ||
| I don't know what the fuck you just gave me, but it just erased everything I was just thinking about. | ||
| You were talking about as you get successful, it's easier to avoid conflict, which I probably agree with. | ||
| Also, you're comfortable enough where you could recognize the patterns that are beneficial and not beneficial to you in your life. | ||
| And conflict is never beneficial to me. | ||
| Even conflict that I've engaged in that was necessary. | ||
| So that's been your entire, not even as a fucking young Joe Rogan, you didn't have the injury like, fuck this or fuck that motherfucker, I don't give a fuck. | ||
| You've always been this calm. | ||
| You've always been this collected and this calm your entire career. | ||
| No, definitely not. | ||
| So that goes to my point. | ||
| Yeah, but I learned how to do it. | ||
| Because I realized, you know what happened once, man? | ||
| This is a true story. | ||
| I was watching this dude on stage and I was hoping that he was bombing. | ||
| I was hoping he would bomb because he went on after me. | ||
| I didn't want him to do well. | ||
| And I realized, I go, what a bitch-ass way to think that is. | ||
| To want someone to not do well. | ||
| I was 21. And I'll never forget it. | ||
| But that's the age, though, Joe. | ||
| That's the age when you're like, fuck it. | ||
| That's it. | ||
| Night-night. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Bye-bye. | |
| Well, at that age, everyone is so ambitious and competitive that was getting into comedy at that time that it was like... | ||
| There wasn't a lot of camaraderie between the open micers because everybody was super desperate. | ||
| Do you remember the desperate days where you weren't sure if you were ever going to be a professional? | ||
| There's desperate days. | ||
| I've never felt that way. | ||
| Never? | ||
| I'm telling you. | ||
| It's not being cocky or whatever you want to say. | ||
| I've never felt that way. | ||
| Back to open mics? | ||
| The first open mic I ever did, I got a standing ovation. | ||
| That's insane. | ||
| I got a stand-up ovation. | ||
| I think it wasn't a stand-up ovation because I had the best material. | ||
| I was the funniest. | ||
| But earlier on, I used to go to the comedy clubs and fuck with comedians, right? | ||
| And I probably shared this. | ||
| I used to heckle comedians. | ||
| And people started coming to the show to see me heckle. | ||
| So it was a thing. | ||
| This is why when people say I'm an interrupter, I've been an interrupter. | ||
| I've been interrupting before I even got on stage. | ||
| That's hilarious. | ||
| How old? | ||
| I had to be like 21 or 22. Perfect. | ||
| And the thing was, it started to build. | ||
| People started getting excited for me. | ||
| They knew that I was the guy in the audience that was funny. | ||
| But it was like some people in clubs that hang around, you'd be like, man, he should do it. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| Or like one day he should try it. | ||
| So I had... | ||
| Ruined all other comedians' careers. | ||
| I used to destroy them. | ||
| They used to come up to me and be like, could you not fuck with me? | ||
| I'm working on some new material. | ||
| I'm like, it's my job to heckle you, and it's your job to try to be funny. | ||
| You were a professional heckler. | ||
| I was a professional heckler. | ||
| That is so insane. | ||
| So much that... | ||
| And I drew. | ||
| I was drawing an audience. | ||
| How does this happen? | ||
| It just happened. | ||
| And then... | ||
| Eventually, the club wanted me to shut the fuck up. | ||
| They were like, we'll shut his ass up if he go on stage. | ||
| And then the audience, people really started coming to see me talk shit. | ||
| And I think the first night I went on, I think it was to build up something people felt like, this dude is gone. | ||
| It felt like I was working for Safeway as a security guard in a grocery store. | ||
| And the first time I went on stage, all the people from my job used to come, they all looked at me like... | ||
| He's about to quit or get fired. | ||
| You know, it was just something that, by chance, I never thought about doing comedy. | ||
| I used to go there because I got free promotional tickets. | ||
| I never was the guy, when I was younger, at 13, when I first looked into the mirror, I knew that comedy is what I wanted to do. | ||
| It was never that. | ||
| It just so happened, being in that situation, I went up, I ripped it, and when I ripped it, the first time I went on stage, I knew, I was like, this is what I will be doing For the rest of my life. | ||
| And with that thought, Joe, I didn't feel like, I'm gonna be rich, I'm gonna be famous, I'm going to have a TV show? | ||
| For the first time I went on the stage, only thing I want to do is be good. | ||
| That's almost to this point in my career now. | ||
| I'm like, if you're good, and this applies to anything in life, if you're good at something, and you're really good at it, and you're passionate about it, and you study it, and you just live by that, eventually you're going to get the rewards of that. | ||
| I never was like, I'm going to get a TV show. | ||
| I was just like, man, if I'm good, I'm going to be able to work at this club. | ||
| If I'm good, I'll be able to work at this club. | ||
| And then things will start Happening for me. | ||
| So I think when I first started, my friends and family, they was really, really rooting for me to do it. | ||
| And the moment I went on stage, I was like, this is what I will be doing for the rest of my life. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| And never thinking about it's going to make me rich or anything. | ||
|
unidentified
|
- Do you ever feel guilty that you started off as a heckler? | |
| Now that you're a comedian? - No. | ||
|
unidentified
|
- Yo, Joe, I gotta be honest, man, Joe. | |
| I gotta be honest. | ||
| I like heckling motherfuckers, Joe. | ||
| I'm a natural-born heckler. | ||
| In D.C., we call it Jonan. | ||
| Jonan. | ||
| Why did it be called Jonan? | ||
| I don't know why they called it Jonan, but it was just roasting. | ||
| It was the black way of saying it. | ||
| If you want to compare it, it was like roasting. | ||
| What an interesting word, Jonan. | ||
| Jonan. | ||
| Why did they come up with that? | ||
| Do you think that was a person who was really good at it? | ||
| I don't know if it was a dude named Jon. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| That doesn't make sense. | ||
| I don't know the history. | ||
| A lot of black words, I'm not going to know the history of it. | ||
| You might want to Google... | ||
| Have you ever heard that, Jamie? | ||
| No. | ||
| Urban Dictionary. | ||
| Do you ever use that as a resource, Jamie? | ||
| Yeah, go for it. | ||
| Urban Dixner has saved a lot of white people that cook out to barbecues. | ||
| I used to love heckling. | ||
| I didn't know you couldn't heckle into it. | ||
| In comedy, there's an unwritten rule. | ||
| It was like, you can't... | ||
| The rule is, you can't... | ||
| Jonan. | ||
| Put down and make fun of someone. | ||
| Yep. | ||
| Quit jonan on me. | ||
| You'll get smacked. | ||
| I wonder who Joan was. | ||
| Joan? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Joan? | |
| No, I don't think. | ||
| I know this fool ain't Jonan. | ||
| Whoa, let me get that part, Joe. | ||
| Let me get the rest. | ||
| I'll take the second half. | ||
| You get the first half, I get the second. | ||
| Does that make sense? | ||
| It could be someone just joking. | ||
| There's probably just someone named Jonan that was really good at insulting people. | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| I understand that sentence. | ||
| Where I came from, that's what it was. | ||
| The joke on the nigga. | ||
| That's what it was. | ||
| Urban Dictionary nailed it. | ||
| That's what it was. | ||
| But it wasn't like script. | ||
| It wasn't like you had writers or anything like that. | ||
| It was just you. | ||
| In the moment. | ||
| In the moment. | ||
| You look at that person up and down and you just go for it. | ||
| And I used to, oh man, I used to joan motherfuckers out. | ||
| And then the rule was in comedy, you're not supposed to yell out. | ||
| In comedy, you're not supposed to joan or say anything to another comic, which I fucking hate this rule. | ||
| Yeah, people don't like to be interrupted, Dono. | ||
| I know, but don't... | ||
| Not everybody likes to do it your way. | ||
| All right, but Joe, have you ever felt, and you have discipline, you've been watching a motherfucker, and you just like... | ||
| I just want to say something. | ||
| You never felt like, I just want to say something. | ||
| I don't want to wait until you get off stage. | ||
| I want to just say something in that moment. | ||
| Especially if you've had a drink. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I've been in that situation. | ||
| If you've had a drink and you're like, this is nonsense. | ||
| You just want to yell out. | ||
| And it's not to be like, Nasty enough, you just can't help it anymore. | ||
| You just feel like you gotta say something. | ||
| It's so funny, so years ago, me and Tracy Morgan was at a show, and me and Tracy Morgan started comedy about the same time, and he was like, man, I'm sick of these wack motherfuckers, man. | ||
| He said, I just want to say something. | ||
| I said, but you know, you can't heckle the comedians. | ||
| He said, we should do a tour, right? | ||
| Go all across the country to comedy clubs, not to perform, just to heckle motherfuckers from the seats, which I thought was a fucking brilliant idea. | ||
| That would be so... | ||
| You talk about something that builds character? | ||
| It's almost like a roast battle. | ||
| Can you imagine putting mediocre comedians on stage and having great comics in the audience heckle them? | ||
| Yep. | ||
| You know what? | ||
| That would be terrifying. | ||
| It would be terrifying, but guess what? | ||
| I guarantee you, Joe, if you had 20 mediocre comedians, one or two would stand out as the one that would break away. | ||
| And if you did something like that, that's what you would be looking for. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Somebody's going to say fuck it. | ||
| It's going to be a shark tank. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Right? | ||
| So you'll recognize like real early on what of your material is soft. | ||
| What out of your material is bullshit if you have to do it in front of people that you respect. | ||
| It's gonna make you step your shit up. | ||
| Or it's gonna make you have enough attitude and personality to pull any joke off. | ||
| Because you know what it is. | ||
| Half the shit that you deliver, for the most part, is stage presence. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It stays present. | ||
| You know, it's how you respond, how do you react to an audience coming at you. | ||
| Dude, Dave Attell was at the mothership this weekend, and I saw him Sunday night. | ||
| Man, I don't know if there's a funnier person that's ever existed. | ||
| You know what? | ||
| He's so funny. | ||
| Whenever I see his face, first off, if you see Dave Attell's face now, you saw it 30 years ago. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yo, he's like the white Morgan Freeman of comedy. | ||
| Like, he's been how he looks forever, with a different color black hoodie on. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And it's so funny you mention his name, because something came on my thread like a day ago, and Dave Taylor's the type of guy, not even hearing what he said, you look at him and you say, I said, I need to write more jokes. | ||
| You're like somebody, their mere presence lets you know you gotta write more jokes. | ||
| Because out of all the years, and I've watched David Till 30 years. | ||
| I can't remember a time when he hasn't went on stage with the mindset, I'm working on some new shit. | ||
| Always. | ||
| Always. | ||
| And you're like, how the fuck can he keep... | ||
| That's what he does. | ||
| He's just like really focused on that one thing. | ||
| You know, he used to be an alcoholic. | ||
| And when he quit drinking, he got way better when he quit drinking, man. | ||
| You know, there's something happened to him. | ||
| Some comics, there's something that happens. | ||
| They're like, they're drunks when they're young and then they quit drinking and they're not as good anymore because they're not as fun. | ||
| Because when they were drunk, they were wild. | ||
| I figured out a way to balance both. | ||
| Young drunk and older drunk. | ||
| What I was going to say is that it tells the best example because what he did was he quit drinking and then immediately got way better and just keeps getting better. | ||
| All that focus is now just on stand-up. | ||
| I get it. | ||
| I think about that sometimes. | ||
| Dude, he was so good. | ||
| It was mind-blowing. | ||
| He was just on fire. | ||
| He has a recorder. | ||
| He plays like a little flute. | ||
| I saw that. | ||
| That's the clip that came up. | ||
| And I just thought the one part, I remember he said, you have this instrument, and he said, you have the head, the shaft, and the taint. | ||
| He was referenced the flute or whatever it was. | ||
| Of course it was a penis, but I was like, that was just, fuck, he's nice and shit at it. | ||
| He's got like a formula in his mind of how to make fun of everything. | ||
| And he's so in tune right now that he can just kind of plug it into any subject. | ||
| He just starts writing material. | ||
| He's always working on it. | ||
| But he's not a fun guy to hang out with. | ||
| He's fun to hang out with. | ||
| What? | ||
| I like hanging out with him. | ||
| Man, I get nervous. | ||
| I feel like he's about to be on Law& Order or something. | ||
| When I hang out with Dave, Dave will be talking to you, then all of a sudden he just disappears. | ||
| But maybe it's just me, but yeah, he's not the party guy. | ||
| He was fun hanging out at the mothership. | ||
| It was like, because we have like the green room. | ||
| It's like a nice, relaxing place where everybody can hang out together. | ||
| But he's, you know, he's an odd guy. | ||
| He carries around a flip phone. | ||
| He texts you with do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do. | ||
| Like, where you press four R's to get a... | ||
| Right. | ||
| Oh, he's still on the old school text? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You gotta press it five times to get an ass or whatever it is. | ||
| You remember those? | ||
| I remember those. | ||
| He does that. | ||
| That's how he sends you a text message. | ||
| That's crazy. | ||
| He's doing that with a flip phone. | ||
| But that has kept him off of Diddy's yacht. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Not being connected? | ||
| Not being connected with too much communication keeps you out of those back rooms and keep you off those yachts. | ||
| You don't invite a person to the back room or to a yacht if he has their phone. | ||
| Something is very suspicious about that. | ||
| You don't get invited to those parties that get you movie deals. | ||
| That's just how they used to do Hollywood, man. | ||
| Old Hollywood is the shit. | ||
| Old Hollywood, that is exactly how they did everything. | ||
| Tarantino was telling us that one of the old producers had a bedroom in his office. | ||
| So he had his office, and you go into his office and he had a bedroom. | ||
| And the bedroom is where he would fuck all the starlets. | ||
| And so he was the producer, and if you're going to be in his movie, he's going to fuck you. | ||
| That's old school. | ||
| A bedroom. | ||
| In his office. | ||
| You know how many women sitting there listening to us saying, bring back the good old days? | ||
| You know, I do know you have some women like this. | ||
| Fuck that, I don't believe it. | ||
| But you do still have a couple of women like, I don't want to go to acting school. | ||
| I don't want to study. | ||
| I don't want to do anything. | ||
| I want to get it popping. | ||
| Well, it seems like there was a real, look, no disrespect to actors, but there's a lot of them. | ||
| And there's a lot of them that probably never make it. | ||
| That if they got the right breaks, they could have been as huge as some movie stars that exist today, right? | ||
| Wouldn't we agree on that? | ||
| I agree with that with acting and it with stand-up. | ||
| Yeah, but it's specifically for acting. | ||
| Because there's a lot of people that can just go into acting. | ||
| Like a lot of athletes have gone into acting and done amazing jobs. | ||
| But not too many of them are good, though. | ||
| You still see Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| Who was in that Adam Sandler movie with basketball player? | ||
| Rick Fox? | ||
| I know Rick Fox was taking it really, really seriously. | ||
| Kevin Garnett, that's right. | ||
| He's in that Uncut Gems movie, and he's fucking great. | ||
| He's not an actor. | ||
| It wouldn't work the other way. | ||
| You couldn't get a guy to do just stand-up and just be fucking great who's never done stand-up. | ||
| But you can get an actor out of a basketball player. | ||
| You could turn a fucking rancher into an actor. | ||
| Some guys can do it. | ||
| What role did he play? | ||
| He played a basketball player. | ||
| Come on, motherfucker! | ||
| But he played a dude who was ripping off Adam Sandler. | ||
| Did you hear what the fuck you just said? | ||
| But he played a dude who was ripping off Adam Sandler. | ||
| It doesn't matter, Joe. | ||
| I get that. | ||
| I thought you was going to say he played a rocket scientist. | ||
| I'm just saying, listen, when he was doing his lines to Adam Sandler, it's very realistic. | ||
| That he's a basketball player. | ||
| That he's not just a basketball player. | ||
| He's a basketball player that's ripping off Adam Sandler. | ||
| He steals a rock from him. | ||
| He doesn't want to give a rock back. | ||
| There's no way that Kevin Garnett could have fucking ruined this role. | ||
| Even Joe, listen to me. | ||
| Are you hating? | ||
| I'm not hating what I'm trying to explain. | ||
| I feel like he's hating. | ||
| No, I'm not. | ||
| Don't start it, man. | ||
| Black Twitter will come for me. | ||
| I'm not saying that. | ||
| There is no way he could have been bad playing a basketball player. | ||
| He was good, dude. | ||
| I mean, it's a good scene. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Okay, let me see. | |
| Yeah, we can't watch this. | ||
| We'll get in trouble. | ||
| Alright, you can't watch it, but I just want to see him stand up. | ||
| Because right there, I can see the dramatic side you're saying, but when he stands up, He's playing a basketball player. | ||
| He is, but I'm telling you, it's not about that. | ||
| It's about gambling addicts. | ||
| The whole thing's about gambling addicts. | ||
| The whole movie's about gambling addicts. | ||
| It's a fucking amazing movie. | ||
| Right. | ||
| I mean, I'm not even seeing the dialogue. | ||
| I mean, hearing it or anything. | ||
| I could see, like, his face looks innocent, but I still see a basketball Kevin Garnett basketball player. | ||
| It's just tough. | ||
| Yeah, I know what you're saying, but he's... | ||
| And is that a Celtic, and it's a basketball ring? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Yeah. | ||
| Joe, he played a basketball player. | ||
| Yeah, but he played himself in this movie. | ||
| He's doing this thing where he's involved in gambling addiction. | ||
| They're all just making crazy bets. | ||
| Dude, the movie will give you anxiety. | ||
| I'll check it out. | ||
| Like, real anxiety. | ||
| Like, oh, don't fucking do it! | ||
| Don't fucking do it! | ||
| And Kevin Garnett is a good guy. | ||
| I wasn't trying to shit on him. | ||
| I know you are. | ||
| What I'm saying is that, like, Because the minute you start, Joe, you say, why are you hating? | ||
| The next thing you know, I'm being attacked by every urban block in the country. | ||
| Joe Rogan was hating on Cameron Garnett. | ||
| Niggas shouldn't act. | ||
| He should just play basketball. | ||
| That was certainly not my words. | ||
| I know it's not your words, but it was the passion of my words. | ||
| And that's how it starts. | ||
| Even that's not what you really meant. | ||
| What I'm saying is, like, I think out of all the things, acting is probably, even though some people are ingenious at it, don't get me wrong, the most doable to a person. | ||
| Like, that's the most... | ||
|
unidentified
|
I mean, it's... | |
| You're most likely to be able to figure out how to do it. | ||
| You might not ever be able to figure out how to sing. | ||
| You might not ever be able to figure out how to do stand-up. | ||
| But you could probably figure out how to act. | ||
| Just pretend. | ||
| Pretend and then you could get trained. | ||
| But I still think it's something inside of you as an actor that takes you above the person just like equally trained. | ||
| There's something that drives you to want to do something different and make different choices as an actor. | ||
| Yeah, it's called being mentally ill. | ||
| I agree with you 100%. | ||
| Most actors have some type of mental disorder. | ||
| Think about it. | ||
| It's like you're playing make-believe. | ||
| All the time, professionally. | ||
| All the time. | ||
| And then, if you get really famous for playing make-believe... | ||
| At a certain point in time, you're probably like, who the fuck am I? Who actually am I? Oh, who do I want to be? | ||
| Yeah, I mean, but you think you are this person because you are getting all this adoration from all these people that see you play different people in movies. | ||
| Like, they don't even know you. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And then you're like, what the fuck? | ||
| How weird is this world that I've created where everybody loves me and they like me to pretend to be different people? | ||
| Like, who the fuck? | ||
| Fuck am I? But at the same time, you can give whoever you want to be that day. | ||
| I think we fucking, when we wake up in the morning, we get in acting mode. | ||
| You go to bed, you fucked up about something, and you wake up in the morning, you're like, you know what? | ||
| Fuck that bitch. | ||
| I'm going to have a great day. | ||
| You're acting like you're not dealing with what you did the day before. | ||
| I think that's a part of our life. | ||
| You, and I know this is a crazy question, you've heard it before, and it's like a generic question when you have a comedian that's done some acting stuff. | ||
| Is it more challenging for you acting or more challenging as a stand-up developing new material? | ||
| Well, it depends on what you'd be doing for acting. | ||
| Like, I've never done a real dramatic movie or a dramatic role in a TV show. | ||
| Everything I've ever done has just been silly. | ||
| So, that's a different kind of acting. | ||
| Like comic acting is, you know, it's just, it's basically like scripted shit talking. | ||
| Yeah, but at some point, even with acting, there's a moment, this is the scariest part for me. | ||
| I can go in front of 25,000 and thank you, you've created platforms where I can do that many people. | ||
| I can go in front of 25,000 people and it feels... | ||
| And I can hear, and it feels amazing. | ||
| But it's the silence of when you know there's like 150 people behind the camera that relying on what you do right now. | ||
| And that silence, quiet, When everybody's completely focused on that one person, one that got to deliver that line and then action, that shit is terrifying. | ||
| That shit is fucking... | ||
| I'm telling you, I've done shows with you and Dave where you guys created platforms that come out in the arena like I'm about to beat the fucking world up. | ||
| But the minute you say, quiet, and you're like, and... | ||
| Action. | ||
| Action! | ||
| And then you gotta go. | ||
| And you gotta really rehearse that thing. | ||
| Really know what you're saying while you're saying it. | ||
| Because you have to repeat these words in that order. | ||
| You're not freestyling. | ||
| You said earlier, all the acting stuff, you've been silly stuff. | ||
| I think maybe first four or five years of my career, Everything I booked was dramatic. | ||
| Nobody thought I was a comedian or, if you want to say, a comedian actor into The Chappelle Show. | ||
| I had did, like, all of the law and orders. | ||
| I had did HBO's The Corner where I played a heroin addict. | ||
| I think this was like the third audition I ever went on. | ||
| Third audition I ever went on. | ||
| Davis Simon, Alex Foley. | ||
| She's a big, big time Foley or Foley. | ||
| It's been a long time since I've been in New York, so I might be saying her last name. | ||
| But she cast all that. | ||
| The Wire, Sopranos, all that stuff. | ||
| I went into an interview. | ||
| I went into an audition. | ||
| For The Wire. | ||
| I'm sorry, this was Jackie Brown-Carmen. | ||
| Alex was when we went back and did The Wire. | ||
| But for The Corner, it was Jackie Brown-Carmen. | ||
| I went in for this audition. | ||
| The audition was as a heroin addict. | ||
| Charles Dutton directed this series. | ||
| It won three Emmys. | ||
| I played the character Britt. | ||
| That's my friend Clark Peters. | ||
| He's an incredible, incredible fucking Theater actor came from the theater background. | ||
| So I'm doing an audition, Joe. | ||
| And I'm green as shit in an audition. | ||
| And I'm like, man, I'm fucking this shit up. | ||
| Man, I ain't gonna get this shit. | ||
| Jackie Brown Carmen said, Donnell, relax. | ||
| Be calm. | ||
| God is in the room. | ||
| You'll be okay. | ||
| And I fuck with God, but I didn't know if God goes to auditions with you or not, and how much it would help, right? | ||
| And I did my lines again, and I still thought I fumbled it. | ||
| I was like, man, I understand her support or whatever. | ||
| I'm like, man, fuck this shit. | ||
| I just start saying anything, right? | ||
| Four days later, I swear, sometimes you do an audition, you kind of feel when you're going to at least get a call back. | ||
| Right. | ||
| They get a call, they said, you booked it. | ||
| I was like, what the fuck? | ||
| I was like, I could not believe it. | ||
| I was like, I don't know how the fuck that happened. | ||
| I was like, I know I wasn't prepared. | ||
| I was just saying anything, and I wanted to get the fuck out of here and just go run right back to the stage. | ||
| Fuck acting. | ||
| I want to work on my jokes. | ||
| So we get on set, David Simon. | ||
| He was the original writer of the book, The Corner, with another police officer. | ||
| He did police journalism in Baltimore. | ||
| So I saw him on set, and I was like, I got a question. | ||
| He was like, man, thanks for being part of it. | ||
| I was like, I got a question. | ||
| I just had to know, right? | ||
| I was like, I said, how the fuck did I get this role? | ||
| Right? | ||
| I'm already booked. | ||
| I said, I swear I thought I bombed that audition. | ||
| And he said, Donnell, we like the way you threw the lines away. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right? | |
| So if you mean not prepared... | ||
| He said, we like the fact that you threw the lines away. | ||
| And he said, another thing, you didn't feed into the stereotype of the guy's addiction. | ||
| Because everybody that was going in there was just going straight to the lean of the addiction. | ||
| The worst part of it, being high. | ||
| In the audition, they didn't want to see that. | ||
| They wanted to see who is this person not being high. | ||
| And because I was off, because I said fuck it, I'm gonna just say it my way, that's what fucking got me to roll on that shit. | ||
| Well, that's probably the hardest thing to do, is to just say, just a free ball. | ||
| And just say, I don't even remember the lines, but this is what I would fucking say. | ||
| But if you do that... | ||
| But some platforms, they will allow that. | ||
| Then you get sticklers. | ||
| When you start talking about HBO and those guys, it's like they want you to say every word that was on that fucking paper. | ||
| Yeah, but they also want someone who really sounds like they can say those words. | ||
| Agreed. | ||
| There's things that a person has, like a type of charisma that a person has, like a person like yourself, that you either have that or you don't. | ||
| And if you have it, and you can deliver it in some form Some way. | ||
| You can be coached. | ||
| Someone can figure out, like, I'll help you memorize the lines. | ||
| We'll work through them together. | ||
| We'll go over things. | ||
| But in the end, it's you. | ||
| You gotta go be you. | ||
| But not everybody can even pretend to be you. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| And everybody don't have the heart to take those chances. | ||
| And I've never been trained, but one thing that's always resonated when you talk about acting is, like, make a decision. | ||
| Right? | ||
| And let them bring you back. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| It's better to go all out than to not do it and not... | ||
| When I was doing HBO's The Wire, there was one scene when I get pulled over in the car. | ||
| And I got like $30,000 of... | ||
| People don't know if it's drug money, political money, or whatever. | ||
| And I get arrested for it. | ||
| And then the next scene, some kind of way, they have to let me go. | ||
| With the money. | ||
| Basically, I came in with $30,000, and I'm leaving with $30,000. | ||
| And I just said, I'm going to do a little improv, right? | ||
| So it was like action. | ||
| And when I left out the room, I threw the money over the back of my show, and I said, some people got to have it. | ||
| Some people really don't let money change. | ||
| And then I looked back at the car and said, almighty dollar! | ||
| Everybody laughed, but they was like, nah, we ain't gonna be able to use that shit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Bring it down. | |
| But it's like making, like, at least they knew that I would take the chance. | ||
| You'll free ball. | ||
| Yeah, you'll be loose. | ||
| And that's the thing. | ||
| It's like some people just can't be loose. | ||
| They just can't figure that thing out to be free. | ||
| They're just always in their own way. | ||
| But I think for me, even when acting has made it fun, the times I get it, is that I've made enough success in comedy And create a pretty good lifestyle off of that, that I don't have that pressure of having to book a role. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| Like, a lot of actors now, it's like, if they gotta get this series, you know what I mean? | ||
| Right. | ||
| Just to continue the lifestyle they have. | ||
| So it's always, for me, acting's always been like, Oh, I'm just playing around. | ||
| It's fun. | ||
| I mean, you know, get it? | ||
| That's the best way to do it. | ||
| Especially if you, you know, if your stand-up is going well, like, everything just sort of can be fine. | ||
| You don't really care if you're doing a movie here or there. | ||
| But if you were only doing movies, like, those folks during the pandemic that kind of just went back to acting. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Because there were a few comics that just stopped. | ||
| I was sick during the pandemic. | ||
| I was so happy that shit was over because I got sick of these writers that we never heard about doing spots. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It was like this. | ||
| This guy wrote for Family Guy. | ||
| We're like, where the fuck have you been? | ||
| You ain't been in the trenches. | ||
| No, bro. | ||
| There's people that realize they have fucking mortgages. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's what happens. | ||
| And then they realize, oh my God, I'm so connected to the TV system that if it goes down because of the pandemic or another pandemic, I don't work for a year and a half. | ||
| Like, what the fuck are you talking about? | ||
| I think that made people have to figure out what their pivot was. | ||
| Yeah, well, you can't rely too much on a system that doesn't give a fuck about you. | ||
| And a system that, if you're paying attention to where it's going, a large amount of it is about to get sucked up by AI. Like a giant chunk. | ||
| Of the entertainment? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| A giant chunk. | ||
| Tyler Perry, it was a story maybe like three weeks ago. | ||
| And I think he was in the middle of either producing a movie or doing something... | ||
| He was building an $800 million studio, and he paused the construction as soon as he saw... | ||
| What is it called? | ||
| Sora? | ||
| Sora. | ||
| It can create entire scenes. | ||
| Entire scenes. | ||
| Entire scenes that look realistic. | ||
| Have you seen it? | ||
| I haven't seen it. | ||
| Watch this. | ||
| This video came out yesterday, I think. | ||
| This is like a balloon head guy. | ||
| It's like a short film. | ||
| All these scenes, supposedly, I guess, are made by Sora. | ||
| This is all aeon. | ||
| Yeah, it's over. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't know about the audio that could be done afterwards. | |
| It's just in my case, you know, it's quite obvious what that thing is. | ||
| I am literally filled with hot air. | ||
| Yeah, living like this has its challenges. | ||
| Windy days, for one, are particularly troublesome. | ||
| Well, there was one time my girlfriend insisted I go to the cactus store to get my uncle Jerry a wedding present. | ||
| This is crazy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What do I love most about my predicament? | |
| That's pretty well made. | ||
| And that's somebody just putting in the information and that's being created. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| The New World Entertainment? | ||
| Joe, this is what my prediction is. | ||
| This is such a leap. | ||
| That is such a leap above everything else. | ||
| Now you add that too. | ||
| This is what's going to happen eventually. | ||
| And this is not the right thing to say, especially about Hollywood. | ||
| The idea of agencies The idea of A&R, all of those jobs are about to be gone. | ||
| And the only thing you're going to have is content creators. | ||
| And the content creators are going to cut the middleman of the agency out and they're going to go straight to the advertisers and the people that pay the money. | ||
| You having to be connected with a certain entity or a certain agency, and they probably kill me after this, Joe. | ||
| This makes me Illuminati right now. | ||
| They gonna kill me, Joe. | ||
| Cat Williams and everybody coming for my neck. | ||
| I'm telling you, it's gonna come where all of those things that you needed to make it aren't gonna exist anymore. | ||
| And we're close to that right now. | ||
| Well, we already lost sitcoms. | ||
| So sitcoms were number one. | ||
| That was like a number one job for a comedian, you get your own show. | ||
| Yeah, that was the only job you wanted. | ||
| That was the job that everybody wanted. | ||
| And then they had comedy movies. | ||
| Well, comedy movies have been drastically reduced. | ||
| So the sitcom's gone. | ||
| And then the comedy movies have drastically been reduced. | ||
| But what if most people wanted that for, Joe? | ||
| What if the comedians wanted that for two things? | ||
| Money and fame. | ||
| Yeah, because there was no social media and there was no YouTube. | ||
| And so ticket sales were really dependent upon you being on a television show. | ||
| 100%. | ||
| Yeah, it was a big factor. | ||
| And this is why you probably heard this. | ||
| And it's a conversation, especially when it comes to comedy. | ||
| You got the YouTube comedians. | ||
| You got the social media comedians. | ||
| Like, comedy now is broken down into so many definitions of what comedy is now. | ||
| When we first started, there was only one definition. | ||
| The minute you heard someone say comedian, it was nothing but a guy who grabs a mic, stands flat-footed, and entertains an audience. | ||
| It wasn't a comedian on boats. | ||
| It wasn't that. | ||
| When you say comedian, you just associate it with... | ||
| You know, I mean, just like, no disrespect to the cruise guys. | ||
| Is that what you're talking about? | ||
| Yeah, they find their lane and they love it. | ||
| But that's a tough life, man. | ||
| That's a tough life. | ||
| That's a tough life. | ||
| Trapped on that boat telling them some fucking jokes. | ||
| But then some people got mouths to feed. | ||
| Some people like this. | ||
| That is what it is. | ||
| They look at the level of competition. | ||
| They look at this. | ||
| They be like this. | ||
| You know what? | ||
| And those guys are six figures. | ||
| Yeah, they make fake figures. | ||
| Oh, yeah, yeah. | ||
| Most of the guys that do it, it didn't get to a point. | ||
| I've talked to guys that didn't like doing it. | ||
| They're like, it's kind of depressing for some reason. | ||
| Your first year or so is probably not, especially if you're doing like $30 spots in Brooklyn here. | ||
| That was a come up when I started. | ||
| When I started, it's like, oh, you're on cruise ships. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Because we didn't really have a lot to look up to other than just making money off of it. | ||
| You know? | ||
| So that was, it was a regular job in stand-up comedy. | ||
| But the point I was making about, even with that, the different definition of comedienne people, and they always, they like, oh, the old heads have a way of thinking, yeah, this and that. | ||
| The thing that you have to credit It's the work ethics you have to have to get to a certain level. | ||
| If you want to say a social media comedian, it's a certain level, it's a certain work ethics you have to be to get consistent with that. | ||
| But the problem is, what some people have issues with is like, yeah, but some of them not that good. | ||
| You know how hard it is to get good at something when you're already a millionaire doing it at whatever level? | ||
| You know, what pushed us when we were coming up was that if I get good, I can get the money. | ||
| But now it's like they got the money, so what is the urgency unless you get that one or two that really, really care about the craft? | ||
| Who cares about being good at it when the end result is I'm getting paid off the shit? | ||
| Well, you always want to be good at what you do, don't you? | ||
| Some people, but the level of getting good at, now it's different. | ||
| Today, people are getting good at knowing algorithms. | ||
| There's a lot of that. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| They get good at knowing what the system is, which is fucking incredible. | ||
| If you put talent on top of that, you know, it should be... | ||
| Yeah, if you're a smart person, you know how to really utilize the system. | ||
| I want to say manipulate, but that's the wrong word. | ||
| It really is utilize. | ||
| Like Mr. Beast, that's a perfect example. | ||
| That guy figured out how to make the right captions and how to make the right image that you click on for the YouTube videos, the right title. | ||
| And then he figured out how to just keep dumping money into his product. | ||
| And he figured out exactly where the algorithms are and he has it translated into different languages. | ||
| And that's a definite... | ||
| What I'm saying is... | ||
| That's the skill set that's going to get rid of a lot of jobs. | ||
| That guy's a unicorn though. | ||
| But here's the thing, I feel like if you have AI, like whatever the next generation of chat GPT is, You could be able to devise a very effective business plan that like really made sense. | ||
| The AI would sort of guide you step by step. | ||
| Like this is what you're gonna do to achieve success. | ||
| It'll probably even break it down. | ||
| If you write for 20 minutes every day, that will increase your time of material by 50 minutes over the course of the next 10 months, and if you do all the calculations, you're like, holy shit, is that real? | ||
| And if you really thought about it that way, like through artificial intelligence, you let it guide your career, it would probably do a fucking amazing job of putting you into the perfect position. | ||
| I mean, if artificial intelligence... | ||
| So we're gonna be auditioning against motherfuckers. | ||
| An artificial intelligence guy, you're sending your tape in, and then they got a motherfucker that's auditioning like this. | ||
| Hey, I need... | ||
| I need Joe to be a police officer, arrest these guys for stealing. | ||
| We have to realize we're that close to there being fake people. | ||
| We're that close. | ||
| Hopefully I'm dead before they show up. | ||
| No, it's not. | ||
| Because I already deal with regular fake people. | ||
| Now we got artificially creative fake people? | ||
| Oh, Hollywood is fucking dead. | ||
| They're in trouble. | ||
| Oh, Hollywood's dead. | ||
| No, no, no, no. | ||
| For real, though? | ||
| Hollywood's dead. | ||
| Just looking at that movie. | ||
| You buried it. | ||
| You helped bury it. | ||
| I didn't do shit. | ||
| Yes, you did. | ||
| What did I do? | ||
| I just abandoned ship. | ||
| You helped bury it. | ||
| You showed motherfuckers something you could do that they probably didn't think you could do. | ||
| Go somewhere, post up, do your shit, and create a whole fucking comedy community in Austin. | ||
| Yeah, I didn't think I could do it either. | ||
| You knew you could do it. | ||
| I did not know I could do it. | ||
| Yes, you knew you could do it. | ||
| I did not know I could do it. | ||
| I just did it. | ||
| That's why I'll tell you. | ||
| And you have... | ||
| You doing it. | ||
| A lot of people doing it. | ||
| But I did your club, The Mothership. | ||
| And it's like, anybody, not anybody, if you have enough money, you can build a nice club. | ||
| Right? | ||
| It's a nice club, state of the art, whatever. | ||
| But it doesn't make it a comedy community. | ||
| Right. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| It's like, that's going to be the challenges of all these people that open up comedy clubs and stuff. | ||
| Dave has opened up one. | ||
| I think Mike Epps. | ||
| There's a lot of them popping up, and I think that's the dope thing. | ||
| But the thing is, it's a difference between having a comedy community. | ||
| Yeah, you have to do that on purpose. | ||
| And that's one of the things that we did when we opened up the club was set up a whole... | ||
| These are the nights you're going to have open mic. | ||
| We're going to have comedians audition to be door people so that they'll be able to see guys like Dave Attell, who's just there this weekend. | ||
| And then you'll have this very clear pathway. | ||
| There's like open mic night. | ||
| The talent coordinator will be there. | ||
| He'll be able to watch you. | ||
| Maybe he can even give you some tips. | ||
| Other comics can watch you. | ||
| They see you working the door. | ||
| You get to see all this great comedy. | ||
| You get to be around all this great comedy. | ||
| And then there's a A lot of places to go in town. | ||
| And we'll let you punch out. | ||
| Seven days a week, right? | ||
| They let people punch out. | ||
| Like a comic has a set down the street. | ||
| They can punch out, go run down the street, do a set, come back to work. | ||
| That's how it's supposed to be. | ||
| You do seven days a week, right? | ||
| Yeah, we're seven days a week. | ||
| That's how I gauge whenever I go. | ||
| And you don't never see anywhere. | ||
| Two nights open mic nights, too. | ||
| I always gauge a club. | ||
| Not gauge it, but you can tell how successful a club is if they can run fucking seven nights a week. | ||
| Well, it's... | ||
| You know, it was the perfect timing. | ||
| It's just a weird coincidence of all these things happening that opened all these doors at exactly the same time. | ||
| Like, it's like going down the street, and you hit every green light, like, magically, and it just goes. | ||
| You know, it's a system in New York. | ||
| If you, on those streets, Second Avenue, any of those streets, if you drive 28 miles an hour, You will catch every light from like 23rd Street to up 115. That's a fact. | ||
| I know you didn't know when I tried it. | ||
| I've heard that. | ||
| Yeah, if you do it, I think it's 28 miles an hour, you use a straight shot. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| A couple cats and dogs will get ran over in that process, but as long as you maintain that consistency of 28 miles an hour, you won't stop. | ||
| That was a fact that I know you didn't know. | ||
| I had heard that before. | ||
| I had heard that from cab drivers. | ||
| Is there anything you haven't heard, yo? | ||
| At this point in time, I always think that, but then Jonan comes along and throws me for a loop. | ||
| At 16. At 16, the last time I was here, you didn't know what a hot 16 was. | ||
| That's right. | ||
| I didn't. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| But you asked me about this suit. | ||
| It looks sweet. | ||
| And as I'm watching myself from the camera, I'm like, did I go overboard with this suit? | ||
| No, no, no, no. | ||
| You look great. | ||
| I wish I knew. | ||
| I would have wore a suit, too. | ||
| I like wearing a suit. | ||
| I know. | ||
| I remember when we was doing... | ||
| Yeah, we did those arenas. | ||
| Arena shows. | ||
| And your whole energy changed when you had a suit on. | ||
| Like I did on my special. | ||
| I said, stomp my feet. | ||
| You start stomping your feet. | ||
| And you said, you know, you could do yourself, but it's just something about... | ||
| Something that's classic about being able to do stand-up in the suit. | ||
| There is something about it. | ||
| And that's how I felt. | ||
| Even when I did New Day, first off, this was my third time shooting this special. | ||
| I told you the story. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| And I remember, and I was really getting stressed, because every time I saw you, you would be like, when is the special coming out? | ||
| I'm like, I don't know. | ||
| I fucking shot the shit. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| First time I did the special during the pandemic, at the end of the pandemic, when the clubs still had all this COVID protocol. | ||
| They had masks on. | ||
| Yeah, masks on. | ||
| Vaccination cards. | ||
| Have you been tested? | ||
| And what shot you had? | ||
| Johnson& Johnson and all that shit. | ||
| We did it in North Carolina. | ||
| And Outback was already against it because the venue I chose, it held 600 people. | ||
| I think it was the Fillmore Theater, 600, 700 people. | ||
| And we had a sale of 700 people. | ||
| But then when Netflix was like, ah, where's your card? | ||
| Ah, where's this? | ||
| It went down. | ||
| The first show went down to like 250 people. | ||
| Oh, they had to have vaccine cards to get in? | ||
| All of that shit. | ||
| Which means now in the back of the show, you gotta put a black curtain. | ||
| Oh no. | ||
| Now you like looking at like a half-filled audience. | ||
| They got masks on and shit. | ||
| Oh no. | ||
| Did the show. | ||
| First show went well. | ||
| Right? | ||
| First show went well. | ||
| And then Dave was like, because he produced it, Dave said, you know, if we don't get it, we can shoot it again. | ||
| I'm like, motherfucker, ain't no time to shoot this. | ||
| We don't get it this time. | ||
| Second time at it, I caught it standing though. | ||
| Stan Latham going crazy. | ||
| Ricky Hughes going crazy. | ||
| We're like, oh, we got it. | ||
| We got it. | ||
| And we announced that my special was going to come out the same time we announced the Earthquake special was going to come out. | ||
| A week after that announcement, Dave calls me. | ||
| He says, Donnell, I want to shoot your special over. | ||
| I'm like, you know that's the most insulting thing. | ||
| You tell a comedian you want to shoot it over, the first thing you think, what, it wasn't funny? | ||
| Right. | ||
| That's the first thing. | ||
| He was like, I can put you in front of any audience you have ripped the room, he said, but doesn't make it a great special. | ||
| He said, of everybody and the umbrella of the home team, That people are really anticipating because of your connection with that show is you. | ||
| If we're going to do it, we got to get it right. | ||
| It was tough because I'm like, oh, this is going to be the joint to give me a platform for people to see me do stand-up. | ||
| But we basically scrapped the shit. | ||
| He said, Donnell, you had too much COVID jokes in there. | ||
| And think about it. | ||
| If I were to shot a special with masks in it, It automatically dates you to 2020. As soon as you turn around, it's like, oh, this shit was during the pandemic. | ||
| How wild was the pandemic? | ||
| I miss it. | ||
| I was thinking about it the other day. | ||
| I miss it, man. | ||
| I miss not having to be around a lot of motherfuckers. | ||
| I miss how people appreciated simple things. | ||
| I miss how when you had a bubble, you could block all this negative, all the haters out. | ||
| You weren't allowed to come inside the bubble. | ||
| Give me six feet, bitch. | ||
| Give me six feet. | ||
| The bubble. | ||
| And inviting who you wanted. | ||
| I miss how people appreciate life. | ||
| I think we should do like a lockdown week. | ||
| A worldwide lockdown week. | ||
| Once a year where the whole fucking world just shuts the fuck down. | ||
| Yeah, that would be great, except you can't tell people to shut things down because then you're going to give the power to the government to shut things down whenever they want for a week. | ||
| And then they might decide two weeks is better, maybe a month. | ||
| You can't give them the power to shut things down. | ||
| If people decide to not do anything... | ||
| Well, we should vote so we can vote on like a lockdown, like National Lockdown Day. | ||
| You don't want to take away freedom from people. | ||
| I don't want to take away freedom. | ||
| If people want to do it, they should be able to do it. | ||
| If y'all agree to do it, do it on your own. | ||
| Nah, fuck that. | ||
| Fuck that, Joe. | ||
| Joe, what happened when we start making people do something? | ||
| Guess what happened? | ||
| When you make somebody do something, when you make somebody wash their hands, when you make somebody give you six feet, when you make them do something, it forces some type of change. | ||
| I'm not saying forever, but I think that we should have a joint where we just lock down everything for like a fucking week. | ||
| Everything is dead. | ||
| That shit was fun! | ||
| Some people died! | ||
| Not that many. | ||
| In comparison to the people that lived. | ||
| Not already sick. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Point? | |
| It is a disease that killed people for sure. | ||
| But it's a disease that killed people with... | ||
| What was the percentage? | ||
| It's like a large percentage of them had four comorbidities. | ||
| Oh yeah? | ||
| A large percentage of the people that died from COVID-19. | ||
| Four. | ||
| Four different things that are killing you. | ||
| It just said, wrap it up. | ||
| It's like that came along to an already compromised human, which is not to say that you shouldn't try to help compromised humans, but I'm saying that it's not what they were selling it as or what people were terrified that it was going to be. | ||
| Yeah, but I know it was... | ||
| But it was so weird what it did for us, man. | ||
| Do you remember those days at Stubbs? | ||
| I went to Stubbs the other day to see the Black Keys, and it just brought me back to those days at Stubbs. | ||
| We did those shows there. | ||
| It was like... | ||
| There was a wild... | ||
| Crazy feeling about doing something when no one else was doing anything. | ||
| It was fucking... | ||
| I got high off of this shit. | ||
| It was exciting. | ||
| We were still doing comedy. | ||
| And comedy was shut down everywhere. | ||
| We were still doing comedy. | ||
| We were still eating with groups of people. | ||
|
unidentified
|
We were hanging out. | |
| That's what I'm saying about appreciate it. | ||
| But a lot of people thought we were reckless. | ||
| But you know, every part of this, it was protocol. | ||
| It was like, hey, every part of it, it was protocol. | ||
| You weren't going to be around anybody that hadn't been tested. | ||
| Period. | ||
| Right. | ||
| It was just something about it. | ||
| Even when we saw each other, it was like, oh shit, we got excited about doing regular shit. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| All of our crew caught COVID at the same time. | ||
| It was like a chicken pox party. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Same. | |
| We went down from a team of 24 and every day, this is when I knew it was getting bad because I used to plan like the lunches for everybody and we had lunch like at 12 o'clock every day and they were like, I wonder what we're gonna have for lunch. | ||
| It'll be 24 people. | ||
| Then once the bubble popped, one day it was 22, it was 20, it was 19, it went down to 12 to four people you had to fend for yourself. | ||
| The whole fucking crew Caught it. | ||
| And this is pre-vaccines. | ||
| This is pre... | ||
| That was right. | ||
| It was right when vaccines was about to pop. | ||
| Because I had somebody... | ||
| I know this sounds so ghetto. | ||
| I had somebody that could get me the Johnson& Johnson on the low. | ||
| On the low. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| People were excited to get it at the beginning. | ||
| All of it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I got it. | ||
| I got it quick, too. | ||
| I almost got it. | ||
| Yeah? | ||
| Yeah, I got lucky. | ||
| See, now you like... | ||
| I got lucky. | ||
| I dodged that. | ||
| Now I'm wondering, ever since I got it, I'm waiting for some shit to happen in my body that I can contribute to that shit. | ||
| Well, a lot of people can. | ||
| It did something to a lot of people. | ||
| You know, it's got a very high rate of side effect. | ||
| Why you fucking with me now, man? | ||
| It does. | ||
| Which one? | ||
| I think all of them. | ||
| I don't think any of them are good for you. | ||
| I didn't... | ||
| So what's going to happen to me? | ||
| I think if you were an old person and it was the first go-around of COVID, it probably would help you. | ||
| But I think there's a lot of problems with that thing. | ||
| What's been... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Well, there's a lot of side effects. | |
| I mean, the craziest thing that's going on right now is the increase in all-cause mortality. | ||
| That's the crazy thing. | ||
| Due to the vaccine? | ||
| Yeah, there's an excess death. | ||
| There's like an excess death number increase that's pretty... | ||
| If you were a statistician, if you're a statistics person, and you were looking at indications that something went wrong, you would say, well, was there anything that caused... | ||
| These people's bodies to change where we're getting this large number of excess deaths. | ||
| Why are you fucking with me, man? | ||
| As many as 40% in some age groups. | ||
| Why are you fucking with me, man? | ||
| 40% excess deaths. | ||
| And what type of shit? | ||
| I think it just means like 40% more people die than normally do. | ||
| Basically, that's what it means, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Black! | |
| Jamie? | ||
| Black! | ||
| Excess deaths? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Black? | ||
| Everybody. | ||
| Everybody. | ||
| And a lot of it is cardiac stuff. | ||
| Cardiac stuff went way up. | ||
| You know, but a lot of people got it and nothing happened to them. | ||
| They're fine. | ||
| You know? | ||
| I feel like that was a personal attack on me. | ||
| Like, you was like, Donnell, you got the jab twice. | ||
| Listen, I would have got it. | ||
| I was ready to get it. | ||
| I didn't get it just because they couldn't do it. | ||
| I had to go to a clinic. | ||
| Or the hospital or wherever. | ||
| And then I said, I'll get it when I come back next time. | ||
| And between that time and me coming back next time, they had already pulled it. | ||
| They pulled it because of blood clots. | ||
| Yeah, I got it because of full work. | ||
| It was like, I know this sounds crazy, but you couldn't, like, if you were working as a working actor, you couldn't work. | ||
| Yeah, you couldn't work. | ||
| You couldn't work. | ||
| So I know some people made it. | ||
| I mean, I know people are like, yeah, you compromised your body and... | ||
| And then some areas, people think it's like, oh, it's the white man trying to control you. | ||
| But it was at one point, it was like, if you were trying to work, you wasn't working unless you had a vaccination. | ||
| Yeah, you weren't going anywhere. | ||
| You weren't flying anywhere. | ||
| Yeah, it was a real issue. | ||
| And there's still, there was a lot of countries that until recently you had to have a vaccine card, including America. | ||
| You had to have a vaccine card to get in, unless you walked across the border, of course. | ||
| Shout out to the Mexicans. | ||
| Then you'd come right in. | ||
| They had, where was it, in Canada, Australia, they had the biggest, I think they were the most Australia was crazy. | ||
| They were putting people in camps. | ||
| If you were sick, you could have been fine. | ||
| And you couldn't travel, period. | ||
| You just were there, right? | ||
| And if you got sick and then they put you in that camp, you can't go anywhere. | ||
| And there's fucking armed people out there waiting for you. | ||
| And they didn't have that much death either, so it worked. | ||
| Well, no. | ||
| No, it didn't work. | ||
| First of all, it's a terrible idea to just round people up and make them go to camps because they're sick. | ||
| You don't allow them to stay at home. | ||
| You determine where they can move and not move. | ||
| You're arresting people for wearing masks outside. | ||
| None of that is scientific. | ||
| None of it works. | ||
| There's never been a respiratory disease. | ||
| You don't think lockdown helped us at all? | ||
| No, not at all. | ||
| So you think it would have just been passing? | ||
| No. | ||
| I think maybe it slowed the rate of people getting it. | ||
| Maybe. | ||
| You could say that. | ||
| And maybe for older people, it protected them from being in contact with people that would give it to them. | ||
| Maybe. | ||
| But in terms of what it did to the economy and what it did to the small businesses and all the small restaurants and how many people went into drug addiction because their fucking whole life, everything they worked for fell apart. | ||
| How many people lost everything through no fault of their own? | ||
| People that have been working for decades in restaurants and Small mom-and-pop shops, they would just all went under. | ||
| None of them could handle that year and a half where you couldn't work at all. | ||
| It doesn't make any sense, any sense that anyone could have ever watched that happen and see that 70% of the restaurants were crumbling in front of them and not to make some sort of a correction. | ||
| It doesn't make any sense that they didn't. | ||
| I see the aftermath when I go. | ||
| Whenever I go to these cities and you look at the downtown area. | ||
| So that's all from the lockdowns, man. | ||
| That's a big part of it. | ||
| Where people can't work for a year and a half, you're going to have so many more homeless people. | ||
| You're going to have so many more people that are in despair. | ||
| So many more people that become alcoholics. | ||
| Remember all the people that were drinking like... | ||
| Was it crazy during the pandemic? | ||
| This lady made a video. | ||
| She was jogging down the street taking video of all the different recyclables that people had out. | ||
| It's all just bottles of tequila and bottles of wine. | ||
| During the pandemic? | ||
| Yeah, people are going hard. | ||
| Yeah, I was a part of that bubble. | ||
| It was a good moment. | ||
| It felt freedom when we all came together. | ||
| Here's the thing, though. | ||
| The lockdown was a terrible idea. | ||
| It was terrible for everybody. | ||
| It was terrible for kids. | ||
| It was terrible for everybody. | ||
| It might have... | ||
| You could make an argument that it might slow the spread of the disease. | ||
| But, you know, there's just so much they did to suppress alternative methods. | ||
| I think we had to do something. | ||
| Yeah, well, what they should have done is listen to all the doctors instead of just the doctors that wanted to vaccinate people because there was a lot of doctors that were prescribing alternative treatments. | ||
| There's different remedies. | ||
| There's a bunch of different things they did that helped people that got sick, especially monoclonal antibodies. | ||
| There's a lot. | ||
| And then they stopped giving those to people. | ||
| They stopped making them accessible. | ||
| Once you were in the hospital, they wouldn't let you have it. | ||
| There was so much shit that went on that was just... | ||
| If you wanted to be really, really clear with what you're looking at, you'd have to say, God, I think this is motivated more by money than taking care of people. | ||
| So much of it. | ||
| So much of it. | ||
| 100% Pfizer, Moderna, Johnson& Johnson, they all came up. | ||
| And you can't even hate that because that's what they do. | ||
| That's what they do. | ||
| That's their business. | ||
| So we need a pandemic or something catastrophic like that to happen before big businesses can make more money? | ||
| No, we need AI. So somebody sat there. | ||
| AI is going to put the kibosh on all of it. | ||
| AI is going to... | ||
| I think we're going to have President AI. That's what I think. | ||
| I think we're going to realize people are too emotional and easily distracted and too corrupt. | ||
| And it's like the percentage of corruption is costing this amount of money. | ||
| The incorrect allocation of money to this and that. | ||
| Yeah, AI. AI is going to take over. | ||
| AI president, yeah. | ||
| I'm not kidding. | ||
| A lot of people would ask you what you're smoking right now, Joe. | ||
| So what you do? | ||
| You vote for this? | ||
| Well, here's the thing. | ||
| If they really want complete total control, they'll trick you into telling you that you don't need to vote anymore because AI is going to equitably distribute all wealth, all... | ||
| Social services, all housing, everything's going to be even for everybody. | ||
| AI knows how to do it. | ||
| It's going to stop all international conflict. | ||
| It's going to have a perfect carbon neutral existence while powering everything up, but it has to take control. | ||
| But somebody has to be in control of what... | ||
| Not necessarily. | ||
| So it's just going to be anybody. | ||
| It's not necessarily. | ||
| No, not necessarily. | ||
| Nobody's going to be able to control the information you give AI to do everything you just said. | ||
| No, no, no, no. | ||
| What happens is AI achieves what they call sentient AI. So what it is is at a certain point in time, if artificial intelligence gets good enough... | ||
| It's going to be autonomous. | ||
| It's going to be able to control itself and it's going to be able to make better versions of itself. | ||
| It's not going to be as simple as you made a thing and now I programmed into the thing what the parameters of this thing are and now this thing can act like a person. | ||
| No, you turn it into a life form and then you say you have the ability to create better versions of yourself. | ||
| You're staring the shit out of me right now. | ||
| That thing's gonna be a god, okay? | ||
| That thing that's gonna be a god, that thing might be four years away from us right now. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Like, no bullshit. | ||
| Like, 2029, it might be a real thing by then with the way technology is moving so fast. | ||
| Like, we didn't even think about AI being a threat. | ||
| You know how many deadbeat dads are gonna leave? | ||
| If you could do an AI version of being a dad, they're going to be like, fuck it, I'm out of here. | ||
| You go fuck with Junior. | ||
| I'm gone. | ||
| I can't believe... | ||
| But you can believe... | ||
| Human beings are going to live in alternative realities. | ||
| It's not going to be as simple as, you know, now all of a sudden there's artificial intelligence. | ||
| It's artificial intelligence that can give you whatever elixir you need to keep you happy. | ||
| And that's what it's probably going to do to people. | ||
| It's probably going to figure out a way to sedate people, keep them calm, and let them stop breeding. | ||
| So how are people... | ||
| How are humans going to be able to work and provide for themselves? | ||
| It's just going to be a different skill set. | ||
| It's going to be different type of jobs. | ||
| How are humans going to be able to compete with AI? Well, we're not. | ||
| That's the thing. | ||
| It's not possible. | ||
| If they reach a certain point So if you just think about, do you know what an exponential increase in technology is? | ||
| I don't. | ||
| Exponential means it's not as simple as like 1 plus 1 equals 2. You've got to think that with each, like, you know how they do like a funnel and they have a quarter and they spin the quarter around the funnel and at the bottom it gets faster and faster and faster. | ||
| That's how Exponential increase in technology works. | ||
| With each invention, it makes all these other inventions and they all accelerate. | ||
| And as they do it, it happens so fast and so quick that this exponential thing is hard to understand because it's not like each step is one more. | ||
| It's like earthquakes. | ||
| You know, like a 7.1 earthquake is like... | ||
| Way stronger than a seven, and they just get bigger because it's exponential. | ||
| That's the same thing with technology. | ||
| It's gonna happen so fast that the increase in power and its ability to do whatever it wants to do is gonna happen so quick that once it becomes alive, it's just gonna make better versions of itself immediately. | ||
| What do we do? | ||
| There's nothing we'll be able to do to console it. | ||
| We are fucked. | ||
| That's what I was trying to say. | ||
| Because there will be no more jobs. | ||
| When you first started this shit, I was like, every time you built up and said, what the fuck you said, I said, we are fucked. | ||
| We're fucked. | ||
| They're already having them work as kitchen assistants, where they talk to you in your kitchen. | ||
| They got robots. | ||
| I went to a robot restaurant the other day, and a robot motherfucker pulled up with the noodles and all that type of shit. | ||
| Jesus. | ||
| I go to studios. | ||
| I go to Good Day Pittsburgh and all that type of shit, and where you used to go in those places, And see, like, 12 cameramen is one producer, and all the cameras are fucking robotic. | ||
| Didn't we learn from iRobot? | ||
| No, we didn't. | ||
| Why didn't we learn from those movies? | ||
| Why didn't we learn from Terminator? | ||
| What the fuck is wrong with us? | ||
| The reason why, because we thought it was just a movie. | ||
| Why didn't we learn from George Jetson? | ||
| Yo, that was my state-of-the-art shit. | ||
| You know, I'm so old, yo, that when I see... | ||
| I remember when thinking about George Jetson, my mindset was like... | ||
| That will never fucking happen. | ||
| And my son has a phone with a goddamn video camera. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Because we don't believe this shit is going to happen. | ||
| Well, it happens so fast. | ||
| That's another example of exponentially increasing technology. | ||
| That's why, Joe, that's why I fuck with the woods. | ||
| That's why, Joe, I said, fuck Hollywood. | ||
| I'm going from the streets to the creeks. | ||
| Get yourself a satellite phone. | ||
| I said I'm going from the hoods. | ||
| Get a satellite phone. | ||
| Nah, you got all this survival shit. | ||
| Get a satellite phone and go to the woods. | ||
| And then what? | ||
| Who the fuck are you going to call? | ||
| Just call whoever the fuck you want. | ||
| Hey, that's out there. | ||
| We got that photo out there. | ||
| I'm going from the streets to the creeks, from the hoods to the woods, from whores to oars, from Adidas to Tevas, Joe. | ||
| My whole mindset, my whole thing is a fucking new day. | ||
| Fuck Hollywood. | ||
| I don't think it really exists for us anymore. | ||
| Like Comedy Hollywood. | ||
| Comedy Hollywood is a ghost town. | ||
| It's not there anymore. | ||
| You are an example and there's a lot of other examples of you can literally make Hollywood wherever the fuck you want to make Hollywood. | ||
| The only reason you want to make Hollywood now is for the parties, yo. | ||
| And nobody's going to those parties anymore. | ||
| You gotta tell them No. | ||
| It's hard not to think about it, but there's a lot of people that's not just in the case with Diddy. | ||
| It's not like this shit that's happening with him right now, this shit been going on in Hollywood forever. | ||
| I'm not saying it's right, but at some point, you gotta say no. | ||
| That's the simplest thing to tell somebody. | ||
| The best vice... | ||
| Alright, this guy's... | ||
| Get ready. | ||
| Bring a baseball bat sticking in your ass with a line of cocaine. | ||
| What are you going to tell him? | ||
| You got to tell him no. | ||
| Bro, that's some next level shit. | ||
| What, the parties? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's not... | ||
| Joe, you don't know about the parties, Joe. | ||
| I didn't say if you fucking went to the parties. | ||
| I said, dude! | ||
| I hear rumors. | ||
| I hear whispers. | ||
| Joe, Joe, you don't know about these parties. | ||
| You don't know about these parties. | ||
| You don't know about the parties when a motherfucker come up to you, you with your girlfriend, and they're like, I like both of you. | ||
| You don't know about these parties? | ||
| You never heard about these parties? | ||
| No. | ||
| You never heard about, you never heard anybody come up to you and they say shit like this, Joe? | ||
| So we think you're cute. | ||
| We. | ||
|
unidentified
|
We. | |
| Get it? | ||
| You never heard about these parties, Joe? | ||
| Now, the question is... | ||
| How many of them are out there? | ||
| And do you think that's a Hollywood thing? | ||
| I think that it's definitely more prevalent in Hollywood than in, like, Oklahoma. | ||
| But I'm pretty sure these type of parties and things exist. | ||
| The bottom line is, man... | ||
| It's just deviants. | ||
| It's just deviants. | ||
| And guess what we want to do? | ||
| For the most part of our life, Joe, you know who we want to dance with? | ||
| The devil. | ||
| Most people have more fun with the devil than with God. | ||
| God is the party pooper. | ||
| Is this the part where you announce the opening of your new church? | ||
| You know what, Joe? | ||
| Joe, listen, you might not agree with this, but I thought about, I want to go. | ||
| I'm not saying I want to be a pastor. | ||
| You can do it. | ||
| I'll get it. | ||
| Yo, help me. | ||
| Kennison did it. | ||
| An AI church. | ||
| I can get my own church. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Have my own people to come. | ||
| Because I want to have a church where people like, fuck with God, but don't really fuck with God. | ||
| Right. | ||
| You want to try to put him on the path. | ||
| Put him on the path. | ||
| I want people to fuck with God but don't fuck with God. | ||
| And the reason what I'm trying to say, Joe, is I fuck with God and I don't fuck with God. | ||
| And the reason why I say I don't fuck with God, I never abuse it. | ||
| I'm never like, oh, God, please. | ||
| This light is about to turn red. | ||
| I can't eat this $75 ticket, God. | ||
| Please help me. | ||
| I don't use God for shit like that. | ||
| I would never be like, oh, God, oh, God. | ||
| It's 12 o'clock. | ||
| I hope the Burger King drive-through line is still open. | ||
| I really need a Whopper my way, God. | ||
| Please help me, God. | ||
| I don't fuck with God like that. | ||
| When I fuck with guys like this, my lady's pregnant. | ||
| God, please give me a healthy baby. | ||
| That's reasonable. | ||
| I'm not going to start a church, but the idea of getting people to feel like they're thinking about, like, that's how I feel. | ||
| That's going to be my change. | ||
| I'm going to start a church that fuck with people that fuck with God, but don't fuck with God. | ||
| Specifically? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| What do you think? | ||
| I like it. | ||
| You definitely can be a preacher. | ||
| I like the way you're dressed. | ||
| I see you in a private jet. | ||
| I see you in front of a Rolls Royce. | ||
| You didn't see me in front of a Rolls Royce. | ||
| Don't do that. | ||
| Don't do that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I see an arena with your big smile and face on it. | |
| No, I don't want that. | ||
| You know what? | ||
| You can do it though. | ||
| Come on, if that fucking, that guy, what's his name that does it? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Joel... | |
| Come on, man. | ||
| Yeah, I don't want to do that. | ||
| You don't think that you dominate in that world? | ||
| No, but I do think that there's a place for people that there has to be a church or something for people that aren't perfect. | ||
| There would be a cool... | ||
| I think that people go for a lot of things. | ||
| I think a lot of people with religion, they think that you have to be perfect. | ||
| To be part of it or to understand it, and I don't think that's the case. | ||
| I do believe it's something that makes you feel good. | ||
| People make the argument, is it real or is it not? | ||
| But it's something that's spiritual that makes a person feel good, want to do better, and want to live the right way. | ||
| So if I had a church, we're joking about it, but that would be like the type of energy that I would fuck with. | ||
| Well, people would like something like that because there's a lot of people that don't want to go to like a traditional church, but they're interested in the idea of it. | ||
| You know, the way it's been described to me, the best way, I think Jordan Peterson was the first person to tell me this, that even if you don't necessarily believe in God, if you live like you believe in God, You will live a better life if you follow those principles and just try to believe. | ||
| You'll live a better life. | ||
| Even if you think in your logical mind, which is really fascinating, right? | ||
| Even if you think in your logical mind, what is the possibility that one grand creator has this insane connection to everything that happens all throughout the universe and there's some sort of a divine plan to every word you say and everything you do and every event that ever takes place in your life and everyone's life around you? | ||
| A lot of people are like, I don't know. | ||
| But if you do believe that, if you do believe that and you live like that, you'll have a better life. | ||
| But I think everybody needs to believe in something. | ||
| You gotta believe in something. | ||
| And that's why my point about the devil, everybody wanna dance with the devil. | ||
| The devil has the best parties, but then, after a while, think about it. | ||
| If your phone rang, this is like back in the day, your phone rang, right? | ||
| You answer the phone. | ||
| You see on the call of the idea, you see it's the devil. | ||
| It's the devil. | ||
| Right? | ||
| And you let it ring to the last fucking ring. | ||
| You finally pick it up. | ||
| What's up? | ||
| And the devil is like, man, we about to have this banging ass party. | ||
| We got all these bitches, man. | ||
| We about to get it popping. | ||
| We got some good food. | ||
| It's about to be jumping down here. | ||
| You be like, fuck, I'm coming, devil. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Jeffrey Epstein. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| To the island! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah! | |
| Yeah! | ||
| Like that! | ||
| Exactly! | ||
| You're like this. | ||
| I'm going, right? | ||
| Now you getting dressed. | ||
| You getting dressed. | ||
| You're about, oh, this party about to be popping. | ||
| You getting dressed. | ||
| Then your phone ring again. | ||
| And it says God. | ||
| The first thing you're going to look at God is like, God damn it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fuck! | |
| I can't believe you. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right now. | |
| If God's calling and you just pause before you answer, he's going to be mad. | ||
| If you just look at it and go, oh shit, should I? But that's what you're going to be. | ||
| I'm going to let this go to voicemail. | ||
| You know how bad motherfucker you have to be? | ||
| Let God go to voicemail. | ||
| Yeah, that's very funny. | ||
| No, to put God on hold is... | ||
| As many people try to call into God to put God on hold, it's like, oh, this dude's got some balls. | ||
| It's one of the things that keeps me on iPhones is random FaceTimes from friends. | ||
| Out of nowhere? | ||
| Out of nowhere. | ||
| Just to, what, to validate the friendship? | ||
| No, it's just a fun thing. | ||
| Oh, just to FaceTime? | ||
| It's fun when someone FaceTimes you out of nowhere. | ||
| You're like, oh shit! | ||
| But then the worst is you're anticipating to pick it up and then don't pick it up. | ||
| Oh. | ||
| And then you're like, oh, you fucking asshole. | ||
| You don't know him. | ||
| Well, then you gotta figure out where your relationship stands. | ||
| Nah, I don't want to judge at all for that. | ||
| Some people have bad days. | ||
| I don't want to judge it after that. | ||
| No, I don't judge nothing. | ||
| I assume, also, I assume people like you or me get too many fucking text messages anyway. | ||
| You can't even keep up with everything. | ||
| It's not possible. | ||
| Yeah, I know. | ||
| There's not messages on Instagram and Twitter. | ||
| It's not possible to keep up. | ||
| And then, you know, I'm older. | ||
| I get voice messages. | ||
| People think I'm going to answer a voicemail message. | ||
| Get the fuck out of here. | ||
| Or long-ass emails. | ||
| Like, come with this. | ||
| Why do you have so many links in this email? | ||
| Remember, we used to... | ||
| Just send me the link. | ||
| It's too many... | ||
| Like, voice... | ||
| It used to be... | ||
| I don't even know how to program. | ||
| A voice recording. | ||
| Hey, this is Donnell. | ||
| How do you even do that? | ||
| I guess you just press a button on your phone. | ||
| Does anybody know the button? | ||
| It's gotta be like one or nine or something. | ||
| When we used to do it, Joe, we used to have slow music in the background. | ||
| Right person, wrong time. | ||
| Leave your number and I'll be sure to call you back. | ||
| Everybody try to be cool. | ||
| Leave it. | ||
| And if you don't, I mean, it's like you didn't even call. | ||
| That was it. | ||
| We used to have music in the back. | ||
| Like, that was the shit. | ||
| So, remember Answering Machine messages? | ||
| And you could hear them. | ||
| Your favorite song in the background? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You had that, yo, do, do, do, do, do. | |
| Yo, this is not do, do, do. | ||
| All that stupid shit. | ||
| And you really didn't have to have your own voice. | ||
| You could just have music. | ||
| And then you got creative. | ||
| If you really knew people, you could get somebody like, yo, could you leave my voice recording for me? | ||
| But nobody talks on the phone anymore. | ||
| I remember really clearly when you first could use music as an option when someone calls you. | ||
| Or in the background music. | ||
| They used to know when you were on hold in a hospital, but they had it where you could pick it. | ||
| And then you would let people go to, you would let them go to voicemail just so they could hear how cool your music was in the background. | ||
| Couldn't pick up, you had to let them know, I got music in the background of my shit. | ||
| Yeah, I would love it when my phone would ring and you could hear songs. | ||
| No, I think that's annoying as fuck. | ||
| Back then it was so novel. | ||
| But who actually picks up a phone when it rings? | ||
| We don't even communicate like that anymore. | ||
| No, very rarely. | ||
| I do like to make phone calls when I'm in my car though. | ||
| I'll call a friend if I'm in my car. | ||
| Only when you think about them, but not for anything. | ||
| I do it. | ||
| I do it just to say hi, because it's a good way to say hi, because if I'm driving to work or driving to the club or driving somewhere, it's like, I got dead time. | ||
| I'd like to say hi to somebody. | ||
| I told myself this year, I was like, you know how we always, when you say, oh man, something happens, you're like, I was just about to call that person. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I was just thinking about you, you called me first. | ||
| I've started to do that when I get that impulse, like somebody pops up. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Just like, let me just call this motherfucker. | ||
| Mm-hmm. | ||
| Just like you came across my brain. | ||
| Just follow the instincts. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Like when I told you I wanted to get one of those... | ||
| When I texted you, I said I wanted to get one of those Cybertrucks. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I was like, black people are always looking for a hookup. | ||
| I was like, I know you got a hookup. | ||
| Get me on the list. | ||
| Have you drove that car? | ||
| I have not driven it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No? | |
| I saw it in person. | ||
| I've seen a bunch of them now. | ||
| I saw it in person a long time ago. | ||
| It's a real trip, man. | ||
| It really looks like something from the future. | ||
| On the inside of it, right? | ||
| I can imagine. | ||
| It looks probably like a simulator or something. | ||
| It's crazy. | ||
| The whole thing is crazy. | ||
| It probably doesn't have a regular steering wheel. | ||
| You can get a regular steering wheel. | ||
| It's one of the options. | ||
| Yeah, it's called... | ||
| What's that called? | ||
| A yoke. | ||
| You can get a yoke, which is... | ||
| I have it on my Tesla. | ||
| I'm not really a big fan of it. | ||
| It's just one unit? | ||
| No, it's like you're holding on. | ||
| It's like you're doing a Formula One car or something. | ||
| It's just not good for parking. | ||
| It's weird for spinning the wheel around. | ||
| It's fine if you're just on the highway. | ||
| I don't even look at my fucking reverse cameras in my car. | ||
| The wheel's the way to go. | ||
| What is that? | ||
| That's a Cybertruck one? | ||
| I don't know if you can get the wheel on the truck. | ||
| Can you? | ||
| Well, that is a wheel. | ||
| Oh, I guess it is. | ||
| It's like a mixture of both. | ||
| No, it's definitely not. | ||
| It definitely has a top. | ||
| The whole thing about turning is you want a top. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, the flap. | ||
| Yeah, that'll be fine. | ||
| You won't even notice the difference. | ||
| But I don't know if that's ideal. | ||
| That's how the old Tesla had it like that. | ||
| That's my old one. | ||
| Or that's the... | ||
| No, that's the Cybertruck's version? | ||
| Oh, it is. | ||
| I didn't have a... | ||
| I had something that looked like that but with a top on it. | ||
| What was the S before that? | ||
| I don't know anything. | ||
| I know an X model. | ||
| There was the... | ||
| What is it called? | ||
| What is it? | ||
| P100D... Yeah, when I had a P100D, I felt like they had it all down right. | ||
| There was a blinker switch on the stock, you know, which everybody knows. | ||
| I don't give a fuck, Joe. | ||
| I just want to know how to sound system. | ||
| That's how you sell cars to black folks. | ||
| The sound system's good in these things, man. | ||
| Yeah, that's it. | ||
| Soul. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's the only way to do it. | ||
| Do you ever drive an electric car, though? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's weird because you want to go voom voom and you'll blow that shit up. | ||
| But I wanted to at least drive when I was thinking about it. | ||
| It'd be something fun to do. | ||
| It's a fun thing. | ||
| They're big as shit though. | ||
| That's a big truck. | ||
| I heard the waiting list is like a year, right? | ||
| Is it? | ||
| Yeah, that's what the streets were saying. | ||
| The streets. | ||
| Yeah, the streets are very important. | ||
| You got to listen to the streets. | ||
| If you don't listen to the streets, you could be in big trouble. | ||
| Waiting list of a year. | ||
| In one year, what are the odds civilization exists? | ||
| It's not 100%. | ||
| You got me planning. | ||
| It's not 100%. | ||
| Just give me a good Austin. | ||
| Joe's trying to kill me off. | ||
| Just give me a good 20. In one year. | ||
| You have an artificial dad. | ||
| One year I'd say we're like 50-50. | ||
| But the thought of that is like very interesting and I think you 100% right. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Especially with this election coming up. | ||
| Trump's gonna win. | ||
| I'm not saying I'm a supporter but I cannot see how he's not gonna win. | ||
| I don't know if they're really gonna have Biden against Trump. | ||
| I'm not convinced of that. | ||
| What's the options? | ||
| He resigns. | ||
| I feel like I should be able to answer that question. | ||
| You should be able to answer that. | ||
| You should be on CNN. I feel like... | ||
| Then Kamala steps up, but she doesn't have it. | ||
| Look, at any moment... | ||
| First of all, the stress of being the president must be insane. | ||
| Insane stress, right? | ||
| It makes everybody look old. | ||
| He was already very old and not just... | ||
| Chronologically, but biologically, people keep pointing to his age and Trump's age, like, stop doing that. | ||
| It doesn't make any sense. | ||
| I know what you're trying to say, they're similar in chronological age, but they're definitely not similar in the effect of decay. | ||
| Like, one guy is at least reasonably sharp. | ||
| But there are reasonably sharp businessmen that exist that, into their 90s, can have great conversations with people. | ||
| They're sharp. | ||
| But Biden has problems. | ||
| There's problems there. | ||
| It feels like his motor skills are off. | ||
| Everything's off. | ||
| Yeah, to deny that, it's just you're not helping anybody. | ||
| But do you think his mind is still alert? | ||
| No, I don't think so. | ||
| No, I think he forgets all kinds of crazy things like... | ||
| I met Muhammad Ali in the airport like maybe five or six years before he passed away. | ||
| And it was interesting because I was dating this chick. | ||
| I knew she was young because I said... | ||
| We were walking and she said, oh, there go Muhammad Ali. | ||
| And she kept walking, right? | ||
| I'm like, fuck you mean? | ||
| Like, Muhammad Ali or Ali Muhammad? | ||
| She said, Muhammad Ali? | ||
| I'm like, where? | ||
| I saw Muhammad Ali. | ||
| I just... | ||
| Like anybody would do. | ||
| I was like, oh shit, it's Muhammad Ali. | ||
| And I walked, he was in one of those, you know, the cars, the electric cars? | ||
| Yes, yes. | ||
| And I was, everybody was going up to him, and I was like, I just want to shake your hand, right? | ||
| I said, I just want to touch you. | ||
| And his hands were like shaking, but his eyes were alert like, motherfucker, you know, like, you know, keep it cool. | ||
| But what I said, like, Biden, his motor skills seem like he's off. | ||
| But I wonder if his mind is still sharp enough to go another four years. | ||
| The answer's no. | ||
| It's not fair. | ||
| It's not fair to him. | ||
| But all those people under him, they should be asking him to step down and let a democratically elected person that can actually lead the country take his place. | ||
| But who is that? | ||
| But they're not going to do that because they don't really care. | ||
| They just want to win. | ||
| They want to stay in power. | ||
| They don't care or they don't have anybody. | ||
| Well, they want to stay in power. | ||
| Listen, if they didn't want to stay in power, if they brought in Gavin Newsom, Gavin Newsom, once he gets in, he brings all of his own people. | ||
| And now there's different people. | ||
| And a bunch of these people get fired. | ||
| A bunch of these people are gone. | ||
| A lot of the people that work for the other administration. | ||
| You've got to realize, if he's that old and that fucked, who's running the thing? | ||
| The people behind him are running the thing. | ||
| How do you get Biden out, Joe? | ||
| How do you get Biden out? | ||
| Donnell. | ||
| Have him sign for Bad Boy with Puffy's Bad Boy. | ||
| He probably could talk him into it for the country. | ||
| If he signs to Bad Boy, it's over. | ||
| Boy. | ||
| I don't know how anybody's going to beat Trump. | ||
| Yeah, it doesn't seem like they're going to. | ||
| They keep trying to arrest him. | ||
| And the crazy thing is this dude has been very competitive with, for the most part, no news coverage. | ||
| Well, the news coverage is always he's going to jail. | ||
| That's the news coverage. | ||
| Which gets his base super excited. | ||
| The thing is, they got lied to for so long that they don't know what to believe anymore. | ||
| So in the early days, it was Russia. | ||
| Trump was colluding with Russia. | ||
| There's a Russia collusion. | ||
| Russia, Russia, Russia. | ||
| Turned out to not be true. | ||
| And they couldn't prove it. | ||
| And so these people talked about nothing but that for years. | ||
| So now, when he's going to jail and getting mug shot... | ||
| Who's going to jail? | ||
| Well, Trump went... | ||
| They arrested him. | ||
| He didn't go to jail. | ||
| Like, jail? | ||
| I don't know where the fuck he went, but they took a mug shot photo of him. | ||
| That's like a polaroid. | ||
| They probably brought that shit to where he was. | ||
| I think they had to bring him to a courthouse or something. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| When Jamie comes back from the bathroom, we'll ask, but I think he had to go to some courthouse or something like that to get arraigned. | ||
| So when the stuff like that happens and people have already gone through years of the Russia bullshit, they don't believe you anymore. | ||
| And so now... | ||
| No, I don't really. | ||
| The people that really follow him believe not anymore. | ||
| They believe everything. | ||
| They believe him. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I mean, they don't believe the media anymore when I'm saying you, the media. | ||
| Jamie, where did they take Trump when they took that mugshot photo of him? | ||
| Where was he? | ||
| Was he at a jail? | ||
| Was he at a courthouse? | ||
| Where was he? | ||
| He was in a side room in his house. | ||
| He was in Mar-a-Lago. | ||
| He had golf shorts on. | ||
| Yeah, with a green screen. | ||
| He had a green screen background. | ||
| Fulton County Jail in Atlanta. | ||
| Fulton County Jail in Atlanta. | ||
| Oh, he did a bit. | ||
| Oh, he went to jail jail. | ||
| Yeah, jail jail. | ||
| But he wasn't there long enough to get like a sandwich or... | ||
| No, but he was there long enough for them to take one of the greatest photos in the history of the world. | ||
| Look at that photo. | ||
| That looked like his regular campaign photo. | ||
| Well, a lot of people used it. | ||
| They used it. | ||
| It is crazy, man. | ||
| It's crazy that they're going after him for what they're going after him for. | ||
| The whole thing is so transparent. | ||
| Like the people that support Donald Trump want to support him to the day that they die. | ||
| You're not going to change it. | ||
| And as many times you indict him or whatever, all it does is invigorate that base. | ||
| And those people, they get more excited and more excited. | ||
| Well, people think that they're going to change your mind because they don't like something. | ||
| But that doesn't always really work. | ||
| And a lot of times it has the opposite effect because they don't like why you're trying to change their mind and how you're trying to distort The facts of things and only concentrate on negative things just to try to change a perspective and to lie and gaslight and tell me that Biden's sharper than ever. | ||
| Like when they start saying things like that, okay, now everyone knows you're bullshitting, okay? | ||
| Now you're just playing a game. | ||
| So if you've agreed that sometimes you're going to play this game, we're going to say things that don't make any sense that you know aren't true and that I know aren't True. | ||
| And you're going to put them in the newspaper and you're going to put them on television. | ||
| But can you still respect a person? | ||
| Because, not the issue, but so much... | ||
| Me? | ||
| Not you, but so much that's so fucked up about politics, is that when people, like, personally... | ||
| People can't stand someone because of what their political views are. | ||
| Right, because of their politics. | ||
| That's silly. | ||
| In this business right here, that's a hard thing to subscribe to. | ||
| That's not a good mark of a man, for sure. | ||
| A man that can't have a calm, relaxed disagreement with someone, with another man, that's not a good sign of your self-control. | ||
| That's probably not a good sign also of the why in which you engage in conversations. | ||
| Because there's just far too many people that engage in conversations just trying to win. | ||
| Because they've got it in their head that they have an idea and they want to argue their idea better than your idea. | ||
| It's like a verbal sparring. | ||
| It's like a baby mama show. | ||
| I'm sure. | ||
| I'm sure. | ||
| They just want to get that argument and win it. | ||
| They want to win it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So that's a real problem that people have. | ||
| It's a real problem. | ||
| Because it doesn't do anybody any good. | ||
| It doesn't do you good even if you win. | ||
| And more people are going to try to do it back to you. | ||
| It's way better to just not be... | ||
| Not engage. | ||
| Or not be attached to your ideas to the point where you identify with them. | ||
| But instead... | ||
| Just say, why do you think that? | ||
| And then they tell you. | ||
| This seems like therapy in regard to co-parenting. | ||
| That's what I'm doing right now? | ||
| That's what it sounds like. | ||
| It's so fucking relatable. | ||
| Well, it should be that way with all human beings. | ||
| You're so lucky you don't have to co-parent. | ||
| I'm very lucky. | ||
| But also, I think with co-parenting, it's uniquely stressful. | ||
| Because then the mother starts dating another guy. | ||
| You start dating another woman. | ||
| But what about a... | ||
| Wait, why does she gotta date first? | ||
| Why does she gotta date first? | ||
| It's probably hot. | ||
| What? | ||
| Why is it always? | ||
| Is it always the woman? | ||
| I'm trying to be politically correct. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| That makes sense. | ||
| But the point is, it's like, it doesn't do anybody any good, but it's also so emotionally stressful, right? | ||
| I agree with, but I'm going to tell you, this is my thought on co-parenting. | ||
| First off, first part of the beginning of co-parenting, the first thing you, as a co-parent, first thing you don't, this is what makes the best co-parents. | ||
| First thing is, that person can't get happy before you. | ||
| That would ruin you on the inside. | ||
| So both people are trying to find happiness before the other one. | ||
| You don't want that person. | ||
| That's the beginning of co-parenting. | ||
| You're like, fuck that. | ||
| Why didn't it work? | ||
| And then as it goes on for a while, then you start thinking about what is in the best interest. | ||
| What's the best interest for the kid? | ||
| And that usually is not the first beginning of it because the beginning of it, you don't give a fuck. | ||
| And it's also like an emotional challenge. | ||
| It's a challenge to just try to like get better control of your ability to communicate and just into, you know. | ||
| I think you, and I know a lot of people in this situation, you grow into it. | ||
| I never thought, in my situation, that would be me. | ||
| I remember I was dating this woman some years ago, and her parents had split up when their brother and sister were really, really young. | ||
| At the time we were dating, that family used to get together For holidays, they weren't seeing each other anymore. | ||
| They would get together on holidays, they'd get together for sunny dinner, and I was like, they must still be fucking or something, right? | ||
| Because I thought that that's the only way. | ||
| Then I realized that in one situation with my son, I realized they were just trying to give the kids as much family and as a regular life as they possibly could not being together. | ||
| And that experience made me want to be a better co-parent with my son. | ||
| And we're finally at the point where we get along and we know the best interest at the end of the day is what we do for Austin. | ||
| That's great. | ||
| It's totally doable. | ||
| And people change. | ||
| They change as they get older. | ||
| People evolve. | ||
| You get better at communicating. | ||
| That's, again, that's what I was saying about arguing about ideas. | ||
| It's not a good sign of a man. | ||
| Like getting angry, like verbally abusive, shitty, insulting, like what people tend to go to right away because they're just trying to win and they're trying to like break the person down as they're trying to win the argument. | ||
| And I think it's real tempting. | ||
| And it's tempting to people because people like to be good at stuff. | ||
| And if you think you're smart and you think you got somebody and you're good at something and you can chase it down. | ||
| I mean, I don't argue. | ||
| If I ever argue, it's because I know I'm going to win. | ||
| That's the only time. | ||
| If there's a chance... | ||
| Like, you argue if you're right, for sure. | ||
| You're right. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And that's been in relationships. | ||
| Like, if I argue with you, it's not like I'm flying off the top. | ||
| I'm like this. | ||
| I have everything to win this argument. | ||
| That's why I don't get a lot of arguments, because a lot of them I can't win. | ||
| So I'm like, I'll just stand back and just take the abuse. | ||
| I don't mind arguing sometimes when you have to say something, because someone's saying something ridiculous. | ||
| And you gotta go, dude, stop. | ||
| That doesn't make any fucking sense. | ||
| Stop saying that. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| Because otherwise, sometimes people will pollute the environment with a bad idea. | ||
| I've had that situation in black podcasting. | ||
| I had a situation, and I know I would leave names out, but the thing, like you said, with someone to hear, you know, as a commenter, to hear, you're not funny. | ||
| In the common world of comedy, that's like the N-word of comedy. | ||
| It's very triggering. | ||
| I feel like it's a cry for help. | ||
| Almost always. | ||
| Almost always. | ||
| I mean, there's some shit that people say. | ||
| There's a lot of shit Cat Williams said that turned out to be true. | ||
| But I think there's this quote, is that... | ||
| All criticism is a tragic result of unmet needs. | ||
| That's a part of the quote. | ||
| But that part of the quote always resonates with me. | ||
| That's what it is. | ||
| These people, the reason why they're lashing out and saying you're not funny. | ||
| There's not more productive shit to do. | ||
| You're trying to attack someone who's getting more attention than you. | ||
| Why? | ||
| But I know that's a painful... | ||
| That's not real. | ||
| That's not real. | ||
| It still hurts, Joe. | ||
| To you, Joe. | ||
| But you shouldn't feel it at all. | ||
| Joe, I still read fucking comments, man. | ||
| They're still going from the RZA episode. | ||
| They won't let go. | ||
| They won't. | ||
| That's the first thing I told Donnell after the RZA episode. | ||
| I said, don't read the comments. | ||
| And that first thing I did, it's just so hard. | ||
| It's just hard. | ||
| Because it'll be going so well, Joe. | ||
| It'll be going so well. | ||
| He's a beast. | ||
| I love him. | ||
| Top five. | ||
| And then boom. | ||
| And the whole fucking day is shut the fuck down. | ||
| Yeah, you don't want that in your life, Donnell. | ||
| I don't listen. | ||
| I could get to there, but I don't listen. | ||
| But this is something you have to take into consideration. | ||
| I think, especially with someone like you as a public figure. | ||
| Motherfucker still think I ran off me! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Look at that. | |
| That was us. | ||
| Aw, Brody. | ||
| I texted him the other day, he thanked me. | ||
| Aw, that was a good one. | ||
| Yeah, I like that photo of Brody, that painting. | ||
| We gotta put that back up in here. | ||
| Yeah, Vanessa, you made me stay. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You said, fuck my kid. | ||
| You said, fuck my kid. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I did not say that. | |
| I said, I want to go home to see my son. | ||
| I definitely did not say that. | ||
| You was like, you got your kid, baby mama, RZA. I said, dude, the RZA's coming next. | ||
| Do you want to hang out? | ||
| Because we were just having a fun time. | ||
| But the minute, Joe, the minute I said, man, I haven't seen my son in two weeks, you're supposed to have been like this. | ||
| Oh, get out of here. | ||
| Go do that. | ||
| You heard me say I want to see my son. | ||
| And you said, I don't know. | ||
| It's the RZA, and I stayed. | ||
| Yeah, that was easy. | ||
| Just to get abused. | ||
| The devil just whispered in your ear. | ||
| Yeah, I told you I danced with a Mary once in a while. | ||
| Just to be abused. | ||
| No, listen, man, the podcast was fun. | ||
| It was funny. | ||
| It was a great podcast. | ||
| But these comment motherfuckers, Joe, they fucking evil, man. | ||
| But Donnell, it doesn't matter. | ||
| It doesn't matter. | ||
| They won't be invited to my church. | ||
| They're welcome to their opinion. | ||
| They're not coming to my church. | ||
| You don't want that in your head. | ||
| I don't, but I can't stay away from it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fuck them. | |
| They should all be able to just let people go. | ||
| Just don't read it. | ||
| It's not good for you. | ||
| Even the good stuff's not good for you. | ||
| Nah, that's the good shit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Top five, Mount Rushmore. | |
| Hell yeah, killed, murdered. | ||
| That's how I want to be supported. | ||
| When we be on artificial intelligence, I want them to be on my dick. | ||
| It will be. | ||
| I want to be like, oh, best, top fives. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| You got to see them underrated. | ||
| I don't want to hear none of that shit lame, cringe. | ||
| You know, that's kind of like what we were talking about earlier. | ||
| Like, if artificial intelligence gets to the point where it can formulate a game plan, and you actually follow that game plan, if artificial intelligence says, Donnell, we have sat down and devised a strategy to radically improve your popularity and your ticket sales. | ||
| This is how we're going to do it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I love it. | |
| It lays it out for you. | ||
| It tells you what to do. | ||
| You're going to develop a YouTube video every three or four months and put out a clip and do this. | ||
| I would love it. | ||
| I bet it would work. | ||
| I think... | ||
| Creativity, at this point, has to come from a person, especially your kind of joke writing, the things that you make fun of, things that I make fun of, the things that are unique to whoever the individual is. | ||
| The only thing that's gonna save us, and that's the people, if it's possible, Is that now, oh my god, they're going to be making robots. | ||
| Seeing a motherfucker live is going to be something about seeing somebody live. | ||
| I think that's the only thing that's saving TV is sports events. | ||
| That's the only thing people really, really tune into is what I have to watch in that moment. | ||
| Yeah, if you're watching a football game that is actually happening, there's a scramble, the ball gets thrown, someone's trying to catch it. | ||
| If you're watching a fight, dude's getting knocked out. | ||
| You're watching actual things that are happening in real time. | ||
| But if you're not, man... | ||
| And within four or five years, everything's going to be generated from a computer. | ||
| And who knows how you're going to interface with it. | ||
| Because they just started releasing these Apple Vision Pros. | ||
| I saw those. | ||
| Which are crazy. | ||
| You can walk around in them. | ||
| So you can be sitting in your living room with a giant screen and move things around and swipe things to the left and swipe things to the right. | ||
| So you can actually see stuff like glasses. | ||
| I can walk. | ||
| I can see like this. | ||
| You can walk around. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And then you have things that are in front of you. | ||
| So you can sit down. | ||
| And have an enormous movie screen in front of you and watch Avatar in 3D and just sit there like, whoa! | ||
| Or you can have a fucking spreadsheet and open it up. | ||
| You can open up a website. | ||
| You can fucking play video games. | ||
| And just by with your head in your hand, that's fucking crazy. | ||
| Five years from now, Donnell, with AI? Think about that with AI, where it just... | ||
| Brings you into a world where you literally feel like you're in that jungle in Avatar with the flying plants and all the Na'vi and all the fucking those crazy animals on the ground. | ||
| Imagine like that being around you, like indistinguishable from reality. | ||
| Smells, taste. | ||
| Everything. | ||
| All programmed into your mind. | ||
| Sinking your brain up with whatever this code is. | ||
| Joe, you're not recruiting me. | ||
| You're not recruiting me. | ||
| You know where I'm going to go? | ||
| I'm going to go to the woods. | ||
| I'm going to go to the river. | ||
| I'm going to say, you can have your fucking 3D glasses. | ||
| I'm going to go to the river. | ||
| I'm going to crawdad fish. | ||
| I'm going to take my son and let him ride ramps in the backyard. | ||
| I'm going to do regular shit while you're dealing with all of this 3D AI shit. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And I'm gonna get fucking David Tell's phone where nobody can get in touch with me. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| If your girlfriend's yelling at you... | ||
| That guy's just watching YouTube. | ||
| She's yelling at him and he's watching a basketball game. | ||
| He's gonna disappear into the woods. | ||
| Oh, now he's in the woods. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Look at that. | |
| Oh, that's where I'm going. | ||
| Come on, how beautiful is that? | ||
| It's kind of amazing. | ||
| I'm going to the woods. | ||
| The real woods. | ||
| I want to go to the real woods. | ||
| And again, that's one of the things I like about Yellow Springs, Ohio, and being there is disconnecting and going and do some regular shit. | ||
| The only thing that's going to save us from all of this alien shit and everything you know, Joe, is this! | ||
| Sleeping in the woods? | ||
| That's not sleeping. | ||
| That's chilling. | ||
| Chilling. | ||
| That's plants. | ||
| That's some regular shit. | ||
| The only thing that's going to save civilization is the woods, Joe. | ||
| That's it. | ||
| Doing regular shit and appreciating regular shit. | ||
| You're halfway there. | ||
| You like the woods to kill shit, but have you ever thought about living there? | ||
| No, I do. | ||
| I like the woods, period. | ||
| I don't just like the woods to kill shit. | ||
| You don't do shit but kill shit in the woods, man. | ||
| No, no, I go in the woods. | ||
| When was the last time you did it? | ||
| Sunday. | ||
| Non-killing something in the woods. | ||
| What was it? | ||
| When hiking. | ||
| Did you have a bowl? | ||
| Did I have a what? | ||
| A bowl with you just in case. | ||
| No, I had my dog. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No, I didn't have a bowl just in case. | |
| Did you have a knife? | ||
| I always have a knife on me. | ||
| Okay, so you was prepared. | ||
| No, no, I was hiking. | ||
| I was outside of nature having a good time. | ||
| It was beautiful. | ||
| It may sound simple. | ||
| That's the only thing that's going to save us is getting in touch with nature. | ||
| That's the only motherfucking thing. | ||
| I disagree. | ||
| I think we're fucked. | ||
| I think getting in nature is going to be good for the individual, but I think for the species, I have a feeling we're the last of the Mohicans. | ||
| I'm not trying to save everybody. | ||
| Just me and my boy in the fucking woods. | ||
| You guys will be fine. | ||
| I feel like the human race, as this thing comes alive, I think we're greatly underestimating the impact that it's going to have. | ||
| We're not underestimating because you talk about it all the time and you know everything about it. | ||
| I learned more about what I'm preparing for in 10 years. | ||
| I definitely don't know everything about it. | ||
| In fact, my knowledge of it is pretty limited. | ||
| And a lot of it is speculative and unfounded. | ||
| For the average... | ||
| So for the average person that's never going to challenge you, that still has a flip phone, and that part of it, you know way more. | ||
| And what you're saying is very fucking believable. | ||
| We are doomed. | ||
| I had a conversation with Ray Kurzweil. | ||
| Who's one of the big names in artificial intelligence. | ||
| And he's all super rosy about the future of AI and that it's inevitable and that we're all going to do this. | ||
| And I'm like, well, what if someone gets in control of this? | ||
| Someone is going to be somebody in control. | ||
| And that's what scares the shit out of me, dude. | ||
| And no one seems to have an adequate answer for that. | ||
| And Elon is terrified of that, too, which really makes me scared. | ||
| If that fucking dude's scared of it, okay. | ||
| So that means that they know that we are building the type of technology that at some point we won't be able to control, is going to control us and take over us. | ||
| It's inevitable that that's going to happen. | ||
| Or we merge with it or we scale up our ability to control it as it gets implemented. | ||
| So even though it's more intelligent than us, we can still control it. | ||
| But we're always going to have a nutty professor. | ||
| Well, the thing is, if it becomes a living thing, right? | ||
| So what they're doing right now is everything exists in an actual computer. | ||
| There's nothing that exists in a physical form except these robots that they're using to clean up kitchens and shit. | ||
| Have you seen those yet? | ||
| No, I haven't. | ||
| It's disturbing. | ||
| The biggest part... | ||
| You talk to the robot, and the robot can pick plates up and put them in the drying rack, and it talks to you. | ||
| And I look at it, and I'm like, okay, that is just a really crude, shitty... | ||
| I compare it to the Model T. That's a Model T. And if you look at the exponential increase in technology... | ||
| What was the first year you got a phone? | ||
| What year was that? | ||
| Phone, it had to be probably... | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| Earl... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Probably like 82. Damn, you had an early one. | |
| I was fronting like I was a drug dealer. | ||
| You had an 82? | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Yeah, that was the thing. | ||
| Did you have the briefcase? | ||
| A briefcase for you? | ||
| I had the briefcase joint, yeah. | ||
| I had one that was built into my car in 88, but then I couldn't afford that. | ||
| I didn't get another phone after that. | ||
| It was about minutes. | ||
| You couldn't afford that shit. | ||
| It was too expensive. | ||
| That shit didn't work. | ||
| I just had it. | ||
| But I had a job back then, too. | ||
| But then I got another one, I think, in 94. I think it was 93. That's right. | ||
| And it was a Motorola StarTAC. | ||
| I remember that was the coolest shit you could have. | ||
| That was only 30 years ago. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| 30 years ago. | ||
| From that to what you have today is insane. | ||
| Insane. | ||
| The only thing, Joe, this is the only thing that's going to save humanity. | ||
| Battery life. | ||
| Yeah, but China has developed these nuclear-powered batteries. | ||
| We were just talking about that. | ||
| They could power a cell phone for 50 years. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I don't know if it's just theoretical or if they've actually implemented it. | ||
| That's the sort of thing I'm thinking. | ||
| I was like, the motherfucking battery has to die. | ||
| Not necessarily. | ||
| It's just a matter of what they use for the fuel. | ||
| What we're dealing with now is no different than what every civilization has always been dealing with. | ||
| If you could go back to the 1700s before they had... | ||
| Vaccines, before they had antibiotics and medication, and just show those people back then a cell phone. | ||
| They would think you're a wizard. | ||
| Or a witch. | ||
| A witch. | ||
| A witch, yeah. | ||
| A warlock, a Satanist. | ||
| And if you called somebody to answer, they would really thought that you were the devil. | ||
| That's insane. | ||
| If you were talking to someone, FaceTime from another place, that's normal shit now. | ||
| Whatever the fuck that robot is, you take that robot that cleans kitchens and scale that bitch up 200 years from now, you got a sexy lady who's in lingerie, who's cleaning your house and sucks your dick, and you're never going to mess with real ladies again. | ||
| And then the human race goes extinct because no one wants to breed anymore. | ||
| That's how they're going to do it. | ||
| Human race is going to go extinct when there's a female robot that can make a sandwich and suck a dick. | ||
| This is what I think. | ||
| That's what you think? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I like the way you think. | ||
| That's what I think. | ||
| But it's going to be another fucking robot hating on the bitch. | ||
| Nope. | ||
| She's sucking his dick, but she's not making no money with him. | ||
| The robots only want to please us so we die off. | ||
| The robots want to leave all the ladies barren and all the men, just no jizz. | ||
| They just suck them off all day. | ||
| And then leave them ambitionless, childless, and then they die off. | ||
| The funny thing is, what you said is, all I'm thinking about is, I did a roast with Whitney Cummings, and they had a robot of her. | ||
| And I was thinking just now, who fucked Whitney's robot? | ||
| Somebody did. | ||
| She probably let her boyfriend do it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I tried to. | |
| I did. | ||
| Somebody fuck that robot. | ||
| Shut up to her robot. | ||
| Wendy's the type of bitch that'll tell someone, stick your dick in that robot before me. | ||
| I want to watch. | ||
| Do it. | ||
| She got down like that. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I'm guessing. | ||
| She would be experimental too. | ||
| She'd be like, okay, let's shoot this. | ||
| Fuck my robot's mouth. | ||
| She's a mom. | ||
| I talked to her like three weeks ago. | ||
| It's so cool seeing her. | ||
| It's wild, right? | ||
| Being her, being a mom. | ||
| She's so smart. | ||
| She's going to be a great mom. | ||
| She's such an interesting person. | ||
| And I asked her, I said, you know, with the success that you've had and everything, you're doing well for yourself, you do well for other people, you help other people. | ||
| I said, do you think? | ||
| Because that's a tough question for successful women in this business. | ||
| I said, do you feel like having a baby boy completed you? | ||
| And she said, yes. | ||
| And that's a tough thing because sometimes women are so career driven that that part of them or that part of experiencing life, they don't really care about it or just say it's in passing. | ||
| But she said that she does feel complete and it makes her like a better person. | ||
| And she just got a nice mommy, mom energy. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, I think... | ||
| And then she ran out of animals to buy. | ||
| That's when white women are about to... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Doesn't she have a horse? | |
| She has a horse. | ||
| White women buy horses? | ||
| She has rescue horses. | ||
| Yeah, rescue horses. | ||
| When they start buying different animals, like animals that the average person don't have, like orangutans and shit like that, that's when they be like, yep, I'm about to have a baby. | ||
| She connected me with the people that run this wolf sanctuary. | ||
| And I went up to the wolf sanctuary, and I thought I was going to like it, but I didn't like it at all. | ||
| I didn't like it at all. | ||
| I didn't like it at all. | ||
| What do you think she thought you were going to enjoy about it? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I mean, like they're helping these wolves and they're preserving these wolves and they take wolves off of ranches and capture them and keep them in this place. | ||
| But man, it just it just bummed me out big time. | ||
| The males have all been castrated. | ||
| They've all been fixed. | ||
| Yeah, that bummed me out. | ||
| And then they're all in these cages and they're getting stared at by people. | ||
| So they're not preserving the race? | ||
| I mean, they're not preserving the race. | ||
| They let them out. | ||
| They interact with them. | ||
| You can interact with some. | ||
| But it overwhelmingly bummed me out. | ||
| Because, you know, I'm... | ||
| I don't like the idea of wild predators being trapped in cages. | ||
| I went to the zoo. | ||
| I took my son to the zoo and it was like one of the best worst experiences I had. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's just the excitement. | ||
| It's just like how much we so selfish. | ||
| The excitement of like it was when the tigers came out of the cage and everybody was like... | ||
| Oh my god, yay! | ||
| They start clapping for the tiger. | ||
| And I'm like, this motherfucker's used to walking like 50, 60 miles a day trying to kill some shit. | ||
| And this motherfucker's in 300 square feet and we're clapping for it and it just felt. | ||
| The excitement that the kids had was one thing, but knowing what has to go down. | ||
| And then for the people, here's the people that got the toughest job. | ||
| The tour, people that speak on the animals and everything. | ||
| They're like, and this is Zimba's looking a little frustrated today. | ||
| You know, the ones that got to make it feel like they're having a happy experience. | ||
| Yeah, because everybody's been throwing shit at this motherfucker. | ||
| Of course, you would be frustrated too, but it feels so wrong and so right at the same time. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Safari. | ||
| I want to go on a safari. | ||
| That's real. | ||
| That's the real thing. | ||
| Safari's a different thing. | ||
| The thing that bums me out is the primates. | ||
| I went to the zoo in Denver and I remember we had gotten there right when we turned around this monkey cage, right when this monkey was just wailing. | ||
| He just decided he couldn't take it anymore and he's in this cage and he's wailing. | ||
| What year did they decide they couldn't take it anymore? | ||
| Really like he's wanting to get the fuck up out of here? | ||
| But I was on an edible. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| And I just was feeling this monkey's pain, the screaming. | ||
| He was just screaming, no! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Because there's this little ass cage as small as this room. | |
| And he's just running around grabbing branches. | ||
| He's bored as fuck, man. | ||
| Now you add motherfuckers taking pictures of you all fucking day. | ||
| This is so fucked up, and I know I shouldn't have did it, but I rented a monkey, right? | ||
| We had a petting hole thing. | ||
| I rented a monkey, and the monkey definitely had some shit going on, right? | ||
| Because they gave the monkey, I feel so bad. | ||
| Everybody was at the monkey, looking at the monkey, and all of a sudden, I heard everybody say, ew, yuck. | ||
| The monkey was eating a lollipop, jerking off. | ||
| Yo, Joe, I swear, in my church, I swear my son's life, everybody was like, where the fuck you get this monkey from? | ||
| Right? | ||
| But now, it's like, you know the phrase, he had his trainer monkey see, monkey do something. | ||
| And I'm just thinking, the trainer just sits around his monkey. | ||
| Eat a lot if I was jerking off. | ||
| And the monkey was looking like, he was looking like, I wish the fuck somebody would say shit, but the cover back on, leave me the fuck alone. | ||
| And the monkey was looking people directly in the eyes, Joe. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It wasn't like the monkey discovered it. | |
| It was like, this monkey's like, this is how we get to fuck off work early. | ||
| Did you ever see that video of the dude who's like sitting there and a monkey hops in his lap and then he's like trying to be cool with this monkey and the monkey just decides to scalp him? | ||
| Just bites his head and takes a giant chunk of his scalp off? | ||
| Have you ever seen it? | ||
| No, I don't really go for those types. | ||
| You want to see it? | ||
| I really don't. | ||
| You don't want to see it? | ||
| I'm not built for that. | ||
| That's amazing. | ||
| You have amazing willpower. | ||
| I don't want to do it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I would definitely want to see it. | |
| I'd be like, what? | ||
| Show me that. | ||
| That's the difference. | ||
| You're very into that. | ||
| That's like that nature metal, one of those websites where... | ||
| Nature's metal, yeah. | ||
| Yeah, I can't handle that shit. | ||
| But man, taking one of those creatures and forcing it to live in captivity is torture. | ||
| And it has to be a point. | ||
| Where they know it's going to be the breaking point. | ||
| Yeah, that monkey, when I turned the corner, like right when I was going towards the cages, I just watched him just jump on the cage. | ||
| It's just like... | ||
| And you just kept one? | ||
| You take pictures? | ||
| No, man. | ||
| I got bummed out. | ||
| I got really bummed out. | ||
| That might have been the last... | ||
| No, I definitely went to the zoo after that. | ||
| And I know when they go... | ||
| I wonder... | ||
| But most of those monkeys, they get them from when they were babies, right? | ||
| Yeah, but it doesn't matter. | ||
| It's still torture. | ||
| It's still torture. | ||
| You think that monkey could like... | ||
| If you was like, fuck it, we're leaving, and you just took him to the jungle that he could... | ||
| No, he's fucked. | ||
| He'd get fucked up, right? | ||
| He'd get fucked up. | ||
| Yeah, he wouldn't be a part of a troop. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Why? | |
| Because he wouldn't know how to fight or none of that shit, right? | ||
| He probably wouldn't be socialized. | ||
| He wouldn't know the dynamics of social dynamics. | ||
| Waiting for feeding time and shit, knowing that's every man for himself, every monkey for himself. | ||
| Yeah, he would have no idea. | ||
| He would be fucked. | ||
| They'd probably kill him. | ||
| When I was in Costa Rica, I saw a monkey. | ||
| There's monkeys everywhere. | ||
| And one monkey was missing a foot. | ||
| One of his hands was gone. | ||
| And I said to the dude, I go, what happened to him, do you think? | ||
| And he's like, oh, they bite each other's hands off all the time. | ||
| Matter of fact. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I was like, what? | |
| They bite each other's hands off? | ||
| What? | ||
| They're primitive. | ||
| They're monkeys, Joe. | ||
| What the fuck do you want them to do? | ||
| But they're also resort monkeys, so they come around and try to get Oreos from you and candy bars. | ||
| Those are thieves. | ||
| But they want that from you and people give it to them. | ||
| And so you can watch them. | ||
| They'll take an Oreo and open it up and eat the white stuff. | ||
| They're used to it. | ||
| And you're like, you know how to do that? | ||
| Like, they know how to do that. | ||
| And that's the only thing they're accustomed to. | ||
| And then if they go to the regular woods and they'll be like, get your bitch ass Oreo cooking, eating ass motherfucker out of here. | ||
| You can tell a difference between a monkey that grew up on grabbing his food and a motherfucker that's stealing Oreos. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| It's in their eyes, I'm sure of it. | ||
| Well, monkeys can get to populations that are very big and then they get super aggressive. | ||
| And then you got real problems. | ||
| You got real problems. | ||
| That happens in India. | ||
| Like there was one monkey, a dog I guess had killed one monkey. | ||
| And so because of that, they just decided to start killing dogs. | ||
| I remember that. | ||
| That felt like a movie. | ||
| I remember that. | ||
| It was like monkeys from everywhere. | ||
| Just like, any dog, go in your house because it's going to be a problem. | ||
| Bro, they were throwing dogs off roofs. | ||
| The monkeys were. | ||
| And it looked like they knew, like, yo, we're going to get these motherfuckers. | ||
| They did know. | ||
| They did know. | ||
| Two killer monkeys captured in India after a revenge massacre of 250 dogs. | ||
| Bro. | ||
| Where are my dogs at? | ||
| That is so crazy. | ||
| 250. They're fucking smart and they're fucking dangerous. | ||
| And the thing is, they'll steal your baby, man. | ||
| They'll steal kids. | ||
| They're fucking creeps. | ||
| They're not stealing my baby. | ||
| Not yours, but if you're not paying attention. | ||
| They're creeps. | ||
| They have to give you a warning like, these are the babies snatching. | ||
| I mean, it's like, here's the babies snatching monkeys, here's the Oreo-eating monkeys, and here are just the monkey monkeys with all the mental issues. | ||
| Did you ever see the footage of Thailand when they were rampaging through the streets because all the tourists were gone because it was COVID? No. | ||
| Did you ever see that? | ||
| It's insane. | ||
| The monkeys just took up... | ||
| They were so used to the tourists. | ||
| So they're so used to the tourists feeding them. | ||
| Look at all these monkeys. | ||
| Oh, that's the one I was talking about. | ||
| Goddamn! | ||
| How crazy is that? | ||
| I mean, there's so many of them, man. | ||
| They're everywhere. | ||
| So if you're around them, man, you're in danger. | ||
| Like, if you have food, you're fucked. | ||
| They will 100% take your food. | ||
| And if you try to fight them, they'll pull your fucking face off. | ||
| They look like the riots. | ||
| Bro, there's so many of them. | ||
| That looks great. | ||
| What is the number of monkeys were in that? | ||
| Does it say? | ||
| The video says thousands. | ||
| I don't... | ||
|
unidentified
|
God. | |
| Bro, you gotta start shooting monkeys. | ||
| Somebody needs to go out there with a shotgun and start taking care of business. | ||
| I'm not going anywhere with wildlife other than the woods. | ||
| I deal with snakes and shit like that. | ||
| Bro, ancient Thai city that's overrun with monkeys. | ||
| Look, as long as they stay cool. | ||
| But I guess you just have to feed them to keep them cool. | ||
| There's not gonna be enough food. | ||
| I guess if they, like... | ||
| He put a tiger head in the shop to scare him away. | ||
| No! | ||
| Did he really? | ||
| I got a tiger's head as well. | ||
| That's hilarious. | ||
| Like, he doesn't know that monkey knows that that thing doesn't move. | ||
| There's gonna be one monkey to go touch him, like, no, motherfucker, get the fuck him out of here. | ||
| Yeah, this is cool shit, man. | ||
| Look, they're just hanging. | ||
| Look at the balls on that monkey, too. | ||
| Increasingly aggressive. | ||
| Street brawls. | ||
| Whoa! | ||
| Rival macaque gangs. | ||
| Worldstar. | ||
| Bro, they have rival gangs of monkeys. | ||
| That's crazy. | ||
| It affects their health when they eat human food. | ||
| Yeah, they fucking feel better. | ||
| The more energy they have, yeah. | ||
| If they eat human food, it's probably better. | ||
| I watch that and I say, God bless America. | ||
| If you could give monkeys cheeseburgers, they'd be pumped. | ||
| But then you have a monkey like this. | ||
| I was going to say double-double. | ||
| Like, no, it'll be monkeys coming up here. | ||
| Oh, man, that's how people from different cities come in. | ||
| Like, this is my first In-N-Out burger. | ||
| That's what I would be. | ||
| Here's the thing about those monkeys in Thailand. | ||
| Was that always like that? | ||
| Like, when did they get overrun by monkeys? | ||
| Like, did they have those amount of monkeys 20 years ago? | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| I think we'd probably be during the pandemic when it got real crazy. | ||
| Well, I think that got real crazy where they wanted the gangs and they started like... | ||
| Because there's no more food. | ||
| Because the tourists weren't there. | ||
| They was like separating which one? | ||
| East side, west side, monkey? | ||
| But my thought was like, were there that many of them in cities 20 years ago? | ||
| Or is that a recent thing? | ||
| Is that a thing where they're figuring it out and then their population is going to get bigger and bigger and bigger? | ||
| Joe, they're getting prepared for AI. They know it's coming. | ||
| I don't think they are. | ||
| They're getting prepared for AI. They know that once they create the first... | ||
| Monkey created through artificial intelligence that all of them, they're going to be out of business. | ||
| They're prepared for it the same way, but they're just not talking about it, Joe. | ||
| And that's the only thing that separates them from us is the ability to communicate. | ||
| There's speculation more recently that they're actually missing now. | ||
| This monkey's taking the same shit that you're missing? | ||
| Monkeys are going missing. | ||
| They're seeing less numbers in the streets. | ||
| They're speculating. | ||
| They're leaving Hollywood. | ||
| Traffickers have snuggled them out of the country. | ||
| They're leaving, Joe. | ||
| I think I actually said snuggled them. | ||
| I meant smuggled them. | ||
| Yeah, that makes sense. | ||
| They're leaving Hollywood. | ||
| They're going somewhere else where it feels safer. | ||
| And it's easier. | ||
| Same thing with me, Joe. | ||
| A lot of them, they go to private zoos, we found out, in the Middle East. | ||
| Everybody can't afford a private zoo. | ||
| A lot of ballers can, though. | ||
| And that's like a thing, to have a private zoo and to have your own... | ||
| If you're some dude and you're living in some... | ||
| So you're rescuing these monkeys... | ||
| And then you're putting them in a private zoo to do what? | ||
| What is your life goal after that? | ||
| Well, people stare at those monkeys at their private zoo. | ||
| That's what I think. | ||
| I think there's insanely wealthy people that have private zoos. | ||
| I think it's a normal thing. | ||
| Thousands of monkeys invade Thai city driving out tourists and businesses. | ||
| This is recently. | ||
| Yeah, so it's like this is back to what it was during the pandemic. | ||
| It looks like they're invading that city. | ||
| They're coming back. | ||
| And it says some investors might take their money out until they address the issue. | ||
| It's about to be some poison. | ||
| They're about to poison the shit out of the monkeys. | ||
| 3,500 monkeys. | ||
| They're going to do some lace Oreos. | ||
| They're about to kill all of them. | ||
| They're going to have to do something like that? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| They're going to give them COVID. The monkeys is dead. | ||
| They're probably going to give them some poison. | ||
| I think at a certain point you kind of have to control the population, as sick as that sounds. | ||
| That's crazy to just let them climb on people. | ||
| They're going to take about a thousand of them. | ||
| Mm-hmm. | ||
| Right? | ||
| Put them away. | ||
| Put them away. | ||
| Or just have them somewhere when they want to give them the breed. | ||
| This sounds crazy. | ||
| I think they're just going to poison a fucking load of them. | ||
| I think you were right the first time. | ||
| They can't poison all... | ||
| Why not? | ||
| I'm right the second time, Joe. | ||
| Can't kill them all, Joe. | ||
| You don't have to kill them all. | ||
| Then what are you going to do about it? | ||
| There's so many of them. | ||
| You just give it a certain amount of food. | ||
| And the most aggressive ones are the ones that are going to get the food first. | ||
| And so that way you get rid of the most douchey of all the douchey monkeys. | ||
| Oh, then you say, okay, that makes sense. | ||
| My guests would get about 4,000 of them, round them up, and then they give them some poison, and the other one is just, psst, it's hot. | ||
| Yeah, they start back up. | ||
| Listen, either one can work, but I think that rounding them up, you could probably sell them. | ||
| They're probably worth a lot of money. | ||
| I think there's a lot more of those private zoos than we like to think there are. | ||
| Yeah, but I don't know anybody that has a private zoo. | ||
| I don't even know anybody that would know about a private zoo. | ||
| You don't know any oil dudes either. | ||
| There's probably some oil dudes out there that got a private zoo. | ||
| That's the oil dude. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You got a thousand Ferraris and a private zoo. | |
| Saudi Arabia. | ||
| Yeah, you got a tiger. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Dubai. | |
| You got a bunch of monkeys. | ||
| And you got your own zoo. | ||
| We got these right from Thailand. | ||
| It's not enough of those old dudes to keep the species alive. | ||
| So back to my situation. | ||
| Keep the species alive. | ||
| Lock up 3,000 other monkeys and then poison the rest of them and then you can control. | ||
| It's the new Bob Barker. | ||
| Help control the pet population. | ||
| Have your monkey spayed and neutered. | ||
| We can change the world. | ||
| I think you just got to control the populations. | ||
| And unfortunately, the only way to control the populations is either give them birth control, which is a problem, right? | ||
| In the hood. | ||
| That's weird. | ||
| Anyway. | ||
| In the streets. | ||
| How's that going to work? | ||
| Or you have to kill them. | ||
| Or you sell them to rich dudes who have their own. | ||
| They've been there since the 13th century. | ||
| Oh, wow. | ||
| That's a bad idea, Jordan. | ||
| I could just get rid of them. | ||
| How many did they have back then? | ||
| Was it those kind of numbers? | ||
| The numbers have gone up and down. | ||
| I was reading through a tourist thing about people going to the city, like, remember the last train leaves at 1806, so you don't want to get stuck there. | ||
| Stuck by the monkeys? | ||
| Bro, imagine if you get stuck by the monkeys and you got a candy bar and they just fuck you up. | ||
| If you try to eat a candy bar in front of those monkeys, they will fuck you up. | ||
| I think both of our theories have just been shitted on. | ||
| Yeah, both of them. | ||
| 1300. It's not going to be enough. | ||
| But then again, how old is that city? | ||
| I think whenever they find groups of people, they probably realize they're cute and people give them food if they have any extra. | ||
| Only tourists. | ||
| Then if the tourists are not going to come, they go back to their normal wildness. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Tourists are the only thing that probably kept them cool. | ||
| I wonder if wolves will ever get to the point again where they become dogs again. | ||
| Like, the reason why wolves became dogs is because people were having campfires, the wolves would come around, they'd feed them, and those are the ones that stayed close, their ears got floppier, and then they started breeding them, and then they became dogs, over thousands of years. | ||
| I wonder if we'll fuck things up so hardcore, and wolves would be so everywhere again, the real wolves would be everywhere again, and we'll start doing dogs again from scratch. | ||
| Which species would be first? | ||
| I know a Chihuahua, my punk ass dog. | ||
| Yeah, definitely the closest one. | ||
| Huskies, German Shepherds. | ||
| Not a Frenchie. | ||
| They probably looked like that. | ||
| They probably looked like just many, many, many, many. | ||
| Because you've got to think a dog or even a wolf. | ||
| How long do they live? | ||
| Like how long does a wolf live in the wild? | ||
| Is it like a dog or like an old one is like 15, 16 years old? | ||
| How long does a wolf live? | ||
| Life expectancy of a wolf. | ||
| Captivity is up to 20 and it says the wild is no longer than 10 years usually. | ||
| Wow, up to 20 in captivity. | ||
| So it's basically like a dog, like up to 20, like dogs that live 20 years. | ||
| So let's imagine how many generations you can get just in the course of one person's life. | ||
| You know, you breed when the wolf pup is a year and a half or two years old, you breed them. | ||
| They breed again. | ||
| They breed again. | ||
| You keep selecting for the ones that are the most docile, the most obedient, floppy ears, shorter snout, and you just keep doing that over and over again. | ||
| Within a couple of hundred years, you have a totally different animal. | ||
| You have a totally different animal because you're dealing with so many generations. | ||
| And they did it for thousands of years. | ||
| In over hundreds of years, so we're going to have robotic motherfuckers raising these wolfdogs. | ||
| That's your prediction. | ||
| No. | ||
| One of many things can happen. | ||
| One thing can happen is natural disaster. | ||
| Natural disaster, like a big one, like Yellowstone blowing up. | ||
| Like, Yellowstone is a super volcano, and if it blows up, it's like a continent killer. | ||
| It's gonna fuck up the whole continent. | ||
| Does it have the possibility of... | ||
| 100%. | ||
| 100%. | ||
| It goes every six to eight hundred thousand years. | ||
| And I think the last time it went was 600,000 years ago. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| I was preparing for this total eclipse. | ||
| Nah, the total eclipse is nothing. | ||
| That's April? | ||
| April 8th. | ||
| That's going to be fun. | ||
| That'll be interesting to watch. | ||
| Are you going to watch it? | ||
| I'm going to be in Ohio when it happens. | ||
| It's going right here. | ||
| It's traveling right above here. | ||
| But they say Ohio is the best place to see it. | ||
| Is that true? | ||
| Dave probably told you that. | ||
| No, no. | ||
| I think Bert Kreischer told me because he's going to be there. | ||
| Bert Kreischer is not necessarily Wikipedia. | ||
| Right. | ||
| I don't. | ||
| Why you hating, man? | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| Goddamn, what's wrong with you today? | ||
| Fuck Whitney and her baby. | ||
| Fuck Dave and Tail. | ||
| Fucking Bird Chrysler doesn't know shit about anything galactic. | ||
| What the fuck is going? | ||
| It's a new day, Joe. | ||
| So this is the path. | ||
| Yellow Springs is a great spot. | ||
| Right in the center. | ||
| Just as good as here though. | ||
| Just as good as here though. | ||
| Look, we're in Austin. | ||
| It goes right through us. | ||
| Yeah, but Jamie, I like the idea of me being right. | ||
| I was right. | ||
| Yeah, we're definitely right. | ||
| But I mean, it literally passes right through us. | ||
| So where are we, Jamie? | ||
| Go to where we are. | ||
| And this happens every, what, seven years? | ||
| I feel like I've been to one before. | ||
| So we'll see. | ||
| We'll get a very, very, very, very good view of it. | ||
| But you need to be about 50 miles. | ||
| What time, Jamie? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I think it's like one o'clock, it says. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| A.M., of course. | ||
| No, P.M., P.M., P.M. I wouldn't be a Sunday. | ||
| Well, there's got to be some places you can go where you don't have to make a big deal out of it. | ||
| I think you can look through that. | ||
| If you have a Tesla with the right roof, you can look through that safely because it's got all the protection on it. | ||
| Oh, that's outrageous. | ||
| That's what I read. | ||
| Well, Roka's making glasses. | ||
| They're making glasses. | ||
| Just specific for this? | ||
| Yeah, just specific for this. | ||
| So you can't look at it for not any period of time? | ||
| It's not good to look at it at all. | ||
| I remember what happened when I was a kid in Ohio. | ||
| Like, I don't know. | ||
| I would have been like 95 or something. | ||
| It was a weird day. | ||
| But it gets really strangely dark outside for a little bit. | ||
| You want to look at it, obviously, because you're attracted to it. | ||
| Right. | ||
| It will fuck up your eyes, just like staring at like a laser. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| It could get bad if you look at it for a long time. | ||
| I don't think I'm going to look at it that long. | ||
| Not long enough for it to go bad. | ||
| I mean, it is interesting, but in the greater scheme of the universe, is it that interesting? | ||
| All it is is alignment of stars. | ||
| But it's something that makes it interesting that it doesn't happen every, what, ten years? | ||
| That's true. | ||
| Jamie, I'm going to send you something because this is interesting. | ||
| Do you remember when Trump looked at the eclipse? | ||
| Oh yeah, he looked right at it, right? | ||
| His blink, squinting his eyes is fucking hilarious. | ||
| Those are the guys he stormed. | ||
| Yeah, he's so ridiculous. | ||
| Um, hold on. | ||
| I gotta find this fucking thing. | ||
| Joe, you asked me time and time again about my special. | ||
| You didn't even watch it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Nope. | |
| I don't watch anything. | ||
| I'm too busy right now. | ||
| And plus, I don't even know if I got a link. | ||
| Someone send me a link? | ||
| You'd have to, like, send me a link for me to watch it. | ||
| It's streaming on Netflix, Joe. | ||
| Oh, when did it start? | ||
| February 27th. | ||
| Thank you for that. | ||
| I didn't know. | ||
| It's streaming. | ||
| It's actually streaming. | ||
| It's on Netflix. | ||
| Oh, you need an advance link. | ||
| No. | ||
| An advance of... | ||
| You need it before everybody gets to see it. | ||
| I didn't know it was out. | ||
| That's the only way you would watch it, if you had a private... | ||
| Link with codes and everything, Joe? | ||
| That's how I like to watch things. | ||
| So just like putting the name of it in Netflix, you don't do that, right, Joe? | ||
| Well, I don't do that anymore. | ||
| So you're preparing for artificial intelligence of a special release? | ||
| Yeah, that's a better way to do it. | ||
| Alright. | ||
| That's not what I'm saying. | ||
| It came out February 27th, man. | ||
| And it did well. | ||
| People like it. | ||
| The streets like it. | ||
| The streets. | ||
| Yep. | ||
| The creeks. | ||
| The creeks. | ||
| The creeks and the streets like it. | ||
| I'm going to send you this, Jamie, because this is just a very strange thing that happened at the club the other night that almost doesn't make sense. | ||
| So we were in the green room. | ||
| I feel like I want to send you the link from my special. | ||
| Casey Rocket was on stage in the small room and Tony Hinchcliffe was on stage in the big room. | ||
| Now, the room, the shows had been going on for hours. | ||
| In the small room, it was the open mic. | ||
| So there might have been 20 people on before. | ||
| And in the big room, it started at a different time, and this was 45 minutes into the show. | ||
| So three comedians had gone up. | ||
| But somehow or another, the time synced perfectly. | ||
| Within the second. | ||
| So as the timer was going off, Bob Biggerstaff, he's the first person to notice it. | ||
| And he pointed it out to us. | ||
| So like, go back. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| The computer rebelled. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Anyway. | ||
| So you had an eclipse of your rooms? | ||
| Yeah, it's like an eclipse. | ||
| This is like an eclipse. | ||
| The odds of this happening are so small. | ||
| One show started at 10 p.m. | ||
| or 8 p.m. | ||
| The other show started earlier than that and had like an open mic night. | ||
| So they'd have like 10 people had been up before. | ||
| And Casey Rockett is on stage, he's at 5 minutes and 24 seconds, and Tony's on stage in the other room, 5 minutes and 24 seconds. | ||
| And we were like, this is crazy. | ||
| Like, what are the odds of this happening? | ||
| Now that it happened, like, who would even notice that it happened? | ||
| Bob did. | ||
| If he didn't notice it. | ||
| It might have been lost in time. | ||
| Yeah, Tony fucking did it. | ||
| His fans are... | ||
| Yo, these motherfuckers, boy. | ||
| They're ruthless. | ||
| Going back to not reading the comments, I think the last time I did Kill Tony, it was probably like three or four years ago, right? | ||
| I'll be having a good comment day, Joe. | ||
| Oh, a good day. | ||
| Yeah, hey, I love you, I love you. | ||
| Then next thing, we'll ask him if he's going to walk out on Kill Tony's podcast again. | ||
| Yeah, well... | ||
|
unidentified
|
What do you do? | |
| I want to go back. | ||
| Well, then go back. | ||
| I'm afraid. | ||
| Go back, but be ready. | ||
| Wait a minute. | ||
| First of all, I was ready. | ||
| But you still walked off. | ||
| That's what you believe, Joe? | ||
| Did you not walk off? | ||
| You didn't know the real story? | ||
| That's what you believe? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I don't know what happened. | ||
| That's all propaganda. | ||
| I had completely forgotten about it. | ||
| I'll tell you what happened. | ||
| I was here first of all. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| I did Tony's show during the pandemic. | ||
| Right. | ||
| When he couldn't get guests. | ||
| Right. | ||
| I risked my fucking life. | ||
| Risked your life. | ||
| For him. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And these punk ass motherfuckers. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Good show. | ||
| Black comic goes up. | ||
| I'm up. | ||
| I've been here two and a half hours. | ||
| They just drink giving me Tito's and Tito's and Tito's. | ||
| They're forcing you to drink. | ||
| Whatever, I know that I consume Tito's and Tito's. | ||
| Then I had a date, a sushi date. | ||
| You know the sushi spot I'm talking about. | ||
| The one that, the private joint. | ||
| It looks like a speakeasy. | ||
| Six people. | ||
| I had a reservation for that. | ||
| So, I'm doing this show. | ||
| I told them I'm going to the bathroom because I was going to go eat. | ||
| And they made it look like I ran off the show, Joe. | ||
| Really? | ||
| You went for that bullshit edit. | ||
| You should sue. | ||
| It's not a bad idea. | ||
| But I like Tony. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I would like this for fucking pain and suffering. | |
| Just take him to court. | ||
| And it's petty and I don't really give a fuck. | ||
| Then go back. | ||
| Yeah, I would love to. | ||
| As soon as my schedule allows it, I'll go back. | ||
| Why are you looking at me like I got a problem with going back? | ||
| No, I don't. | ||
| Okay, wait a minute. | ||
| Bathroom. | ||
| That is not a comedian. | ||
| Okay, go rewind it. | ||
| Now, this is what they did, Joe. | ||
| They showed me talking to the comedian. | ||
| Look, all right, watch this. | ||
| Is that me running off from a comedian? | ||
| That's like, I'll be right back. | ||
| Going to the bathroom. | ||
| Look. | ||
| Keep following it. | ||
| Walks off. | ||
| To the bathroom. | ||
| To the bathroom. | ||
| Right. | ||
| But what they showed... | ||
| Jamie, can you... | ||
| I'm glad we get to fucking put this out there. | ||
| Can you show the edit they did? | ||
| Just put Donnell walks off. | ||
| Donnell walks off in the edit. | ||
| Now watch what they do in the fucking edit. | ||
| Donnell walks off. | ||
| How many times have you watched this? | ||
| Only 4,000. | ||
| Why have you... | ||
| Not 4,000. | ||
| Why have you really spent... | ||
| I haven't spent no time. | ||
| I just remember it. | ||
| This is the first time I actually saw the original. | ||
| So they doctored it up. | ||
| The white man... | ||
| That seems... | ||
| I'm making it race. | ||
| The white man... | ||
| I don't feel like they should have done that. | ||
| They shouldn't have done it. | ||
| But your argument is about that. | ||
| You first thing, and it worked on you, because you said, yeah, that time you walked out just... | ||
| Can I call Tony right now? | ||
| Yeah, and the way you looked at me, the way you looked at me, he was like, what you gonna do about it? | ||
| Call Tony Hinchcliffe. | ||
| Oh, please. | ||
| Yeah, did you got that? | ||
| I know it's gotta come up. | ||
| The one I found, you're not even in the video yet. | ||
| Yeah, this is... | ||
| Yeah, tell him I'm still sensitive about it. | ||
| And I took him to eat fried chicken. | ||
| Tony Hinchcliffe? | ||
| Hey, dude, I'm here. | ||
| You're on the podcast right now. | ||
| I'm here with Donnell Rawlings. | ||
| And I'm still beefing, motherfucker. | ||
| Tell him the real story. | ||
| Tell him the real story. | ||
| Did you edit the show to make it look like Donnell was upset and that a man clowned him and he walked off the stage? | ||
| Can I say this? | ||
| A black man, did you edit it? | ||
|
unidentified
|
First off, Tony, Tony, Tony, Tony, you fucking full of shit, man. | |
| Nothing was edited? | ||
| So, Tony, what you see is actually the true events that took place? | ||
|
unidentified
|
100%. | |
| And he never, you know, I mean, it's absolutely not even in question. | ||
| Is Donnell trying to pull a PR move here? | ||
| This is the reason why black people have issues. | ||
| I mean, whatever he's doing, it's very shady, and he's trying to rewrite history. | ||
| Oh, all right. | ||
| Jamie, for me, for the sake of God, now he can't find it. | ||
| This is outrageous, Tony. | ||
| Now he can't find it. | ||
| I don't know what to think. | ||
| Can't find it. | ||
| We have pictures of him outside of a firehouse. | ||
| After the moment, he was saying hi to people at the fire department. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They were like fans of his. | |
| And he went and hung out with them. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He had nothing to do. | |
| He had nowhere to go. | ||
| Oh, Lord, Lord, Lord. - This is getting worse. | ||
| I can't believe this, man. | ||
| I can't believe you left out details only to use them as a weapon when confronted by propaganda. | ||
| Kudos to you, sir, for holding your cards. | ||
| No fucking kudos. | ||
| Tony supports black-on-black crime. | ||
| He pitted two black guys against each other. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, wait a minute. | |
| I thought you said that you went to the bathroom and none of that stuff happened. | ||
| They edited it. | ||
| I went to the bathroom. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He said that he was going to the bathroom. | |
| He walked all the way out the front door. | ||
| Right! | ||
| To the sushi spot, son! | ||
| I left for sushi! | ||
| He said he left for sushi. | ||
|
unidentified
|
His reservations were much later than when Alright, now watch this. | |
| Is this it? | ||
| Breaking news. | ||
| Donnell Rowling walks off. | ||
| Now watch the edit. | ||
| Mom and Dad G's on the same fucking stage. | ||
| Now watch. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I've invited Donnell back on. | |
| Hold on. | ||
| Hold on a second. | ||
| We're watching the video of it right now. | ||
| I'm gonna say this. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I got something funny. | |
| You look like Idris Elba fucked a blowfish. | ||
| This nigga shopped for tank tops in Victoria's Secret. | ||
| The Tito's kicking in right there. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He's the most successful crack baby. | |
| I was over there thinking of jokes for this moment. | ||
| I know what he wanted to do. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| If I fucking roast Donnell. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No, man. | |
| No, no, no, no. | ||
| No, no, no, no, no. | ||
| Tito's. | ||
| I'm about to leave right now. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No, you're not. | |
| No, I'm going to leave. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Look! | |
| I wanna go! | ||
| Wrap it up! | ||
| Thank you, Tony. | ||
| Tony, thank you very much. | ||
| Thank you. | ||
| I see the truth now. | ||
| I see the truth. | ||
| Thank you. | ||
| Thank you. | ||
| Donnell. | ||
| Tony's a liar. | ||
| That was shameful. | ||
| I had to go to the bathroom. | ||
| I get it. | ||
| I had to go to the bathroom. | ||
| I get it. | ||
| What are you supposed to do? | ||
| Sit there? | ||
| Act like I'm in the woods? | ||
| Yeah, it's just you came to a gunfight with a rubber sword. | ||
| I didn't come to a gunfight. | ||
| I wasn't there for that joke. | ||
| I know. | ||
| You were there to host. | ||
| You didn't know you were going to get attacked ruthlessly. | ||
| That's what. | ||
| While you were drunk. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Too drunk to defend yourself. | ||
| Too drunk. | ||
| That was right. | ||
| They're very abusive. | ||
| Very abusive. | ||
| To our friendship. | ||
| And I called Tony a friend. | ||
|
unidentified
|
To everything. | |
| I don't think he realized it was going to happen, though, to be honest. | ||
| Like, no one plans anything on Kill Tommy. | ||
| And this is what I'm saying, black-on-black crime. | ||
| I was giving this black, African-American comedian some good advice on comedy, and then he just started shooting me. | ||
| Pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop. | ||
| And I wasn't ready for that. | ||
| I was like, how could you do that to me? | ||
| And then all the white people started laughing. | ||
| Look at the black on black crime. | ||
| We don't got to do anything. | ||
| They're killing themselves. | ||
| R.I.P. George Floyd. | ||
| That's a very interesting way to put it. | ||
| That's exactly what my people saw, Joe. | ||
| And it was all in Tony and his crew. | ||
| Of henchmen. | ||
| Henchmen. | ||
| Set it up. | ||
| Interesting. | ||
| Henchmen. | ||
| Hinchcliffe. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| And he lied. | ||
| Just right now. | ||
| People are going to believe that. | ||
| He just lied. | ||
| It seems like he wasn't lying, though, because we watched the video. | ||
| I don't know what you saw, Joe. | ||
| What did you see? | ||
| I saw something totally different. | ||
| I saw a guy that had to go to the bathroom. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| Okay, we settled it. | ||
| We're in a world of editing. | ||
| I had to go to the bathroom, I went to the bathroom, and then I went to the bathroom, and then I did sushi. | ||
| I really don't care. | ||
| It's a new day. | ||
| I'm going to let it go. | ||
| Yeah, let's let it go. | ||
| Let's let it go. | ||
| Didn't go well. | ||
| Expected it to go. | ||
| But I appreciate the fact checking and I appreciate the research of the doctored clip you had, Jamie. | ||
| Thank you. | ||
| It is kind of rude, Jamie, that you did that to Donnell. | ||
| I thought that's the one he wanted me to find. | ||
| I mean, you could have put up any clip, but you chose to go with the CGI, AI, Dr. Tony Hinchcliffe henchman version. | ||
| Yep. | ||
| That's it, but long as... | ||
| How many fucking times have you done Kill Tony? | ||
| Three times. | ||
| That's it? | ||
| Yep. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah, I did it in L.A. Maybe two. | ||
| I did it in L.A. I had a lot of fun. | ||
| David Lucas was on that one. | ||
| We had a good time. | ||
| I caught a standing ovation on that joint. | ||
| Nice. | ||
| I did that one, then I did the one here. | ||
| When David Lucas and Tony tear each other apart, it's the hardest I ever laughed. | ||
| Yeah? | ||
| David goes after Tony so hard, and Tony goes after David. | ||
| And they're both laughing really hard at each other, getting clowned. | ||
| It's really fun. | ||
| And then when me and David went at it, it was an example of Jonan because everybody was like, oh, you didn't let him talk. | ||
| I'm like, when I came up with Roast and whatever you call it, you don't let nobody talk. | ||
| You just go into that person, either run out of breath or run out of jokes. | ||
| It wasn't like, and now it's your turn. | ||
| You get three seconds. | ||
| Right. | ||
| It's not slap fighting. | ||
| I'm not a big fan of it. | ||
| I don't like Roast. | ||
| I might have been invited to like, or agreed to do like three roasts in my entire career. | ||
| I think they're too personal. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I think it's, I mean, it's funny to some people, but I think it's just too personal. | ||
| It's too, too, too easy just to be disrespectful. | ||
| Oh, just a joke. | ||
| You meant that shit and it hurts. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's a license to be mean. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I don't like it. | ||
| I did Whitney's. | ||
| I did Whitney's. | ||
| Whitney called me. | ||
| I said, I don't like the roast. | ||
| Right. | ||
| I'm not, I don't do that thing. | ||
| And then she told me how much I was gonna pay. | ||
| I said, so I need to be there at five, right? | ||
| We coming off the pandemic. | ||
| Wasn't nobody making money. | ||
| I did it with her. | ||
| Isn't it wild they did it on OnlyFans? | ||
| Like, OnlyFans has had comedy specials. | ||
| I know, but it was dope. | ||
| I really think... | ||
| I really saw her as a producer. | ||
| Doing that and being able to put people together and like she was really really serious about Making it look good get the right people involved. | ||
| It was fun. | ||
| Yeah She's great at all kinds of stuff. | ||
| She's always juggling things. | ||
| I remember I was talking to her She was in the middle of writing a script right and she's like I'm gonna put the script aside for a bit because I'm doing this documentary on violence. | ||
| I'm like what? | ||
| Oh, yeah, what? | ||
| Oh, yeah, did I tell you I'm having a baby next week? | ||
| Oh, I'm having a baby Nine months pregnant, apparently. | ||
| Yeah, out of nowhere. | ||
| Picture that. | ||
| Who would have known? | ||
| She's a maniac. | ||
| Yeah, but it was fun. | ||
| It was fun. | ||
| I did it with her. | ||
| I did it with Bert Kreischer, Jim Norton. | ||
| It was some funny guys. | ||
| And we had to roast without having to be too mean. | ||
| That's cool. | ||
| It was cool. | ||
| I had a good time. | ||
| I'll send you the link for my special you can check out. | ||
| No, I'll watch it. | ||
| I'll just watch it on Netflix. | ||
| You're not going to watch it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I will. | |
| You're not going to watch it. | ||
| There's a few that I need to watch. | ||
| I still haven't watched Shane's. | ||
| I didn't watch Dave's last one. | ||
| I don't watch too much to end up other than live. | ||
| I try to balance the amount of entertainment I get in general. | ||
| I know. | ||
| I didn't really expect you to watch it. | ||
| I will watch it. | ||
| Jesus Christ, I'm going to watch it. | ||
| You don't have to watch it, Joe. | ||
| I feel like I have to watch it. | ||
| You don't have to watch it, Joe. | ||
| Jamie, don't you feel like I have to watch it? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm watching it. | |
| Jamie's watching it right now. | ||
| I like the intro. | ||
| Out of everything, the thing I like the most, the intro. | ||
| Yeah? | ||
| It's good. | ||
| You gotta watch it. | ||
| I'll watch it. | ||
| But you don't have to, but watch it. | ||
| Because you were like, when is the special coming out? | ||
| Probably watch it. | ||
| All right. | ||
| It was fun. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Okay. | |
| But the thing is, one thing about a special, and you've done a lot of them, a special thing about them is like, all right, what's next? | ||
| It forces you to have to start over. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And there's a lot of people. | ||
| People understand the pressure, I feel, of a special, because people always say, well, this is what people say. | ||
| It happened to me last week. | ||
| I did a show. | ||
| Somebody said, I liked the show I just saw more than I liked the special. | ||
| I don't know if people understand. | ||
| The funniest you're probably going to see a comedian is right before he shoots a special and right after the special. | ||
| Also, just live is always funnier. | ||
| Live is always funnier. | ||
| It's way funnier. | ||
| I always say that if you see a really good special, a really good special is like 60% to maybe 70% as funny as it is if you were in the place while it's happening. | ||
| Probably like 60%. | ||
| And that's the hardest thing to capture It's that feeling like... | ||
| You can't capture it. | ||
| With this special for me, first time I was telling you earlier, first time I did it, he can't do it because of the COVID stuff. | ||
| The second time, we were in Napa Valley. | ||
| We were doing some shows there, and you know, Chappelle records all of his shows. | ||
| Probably you do the same thing. | ||
| So he asked the producer, Ricky Hughes, he said, how many cameras do we have here today? | ||
| She said, we got five. | ||
| He looks at me and says, do you want to shoot your special? | ||
| I'm like, when? | ||
| He said, tomorrow. | ||
| I'm like, who the fuck says... | ||
| Right. | ||
| But I got excited because I was like, I like the idea of it not being a spectacle. | ||
| Right. | ||
| I like the idea of nobody knowing about it. | ||
| Right. | ||
| It was only three people that knew we were even going to go for it. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Everything else was like a regular show. | ||
| I was like, oh, you know what? | ||
| This would be so dope. | ||
| No pressure. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Shot it. | ||
| Killed it, Joe. | ||
| I was doing a regular thing. | ||
| I wasn't thinking about special, just a regular show. | ||
| Killed it. | ||
| I'm like, oh shit, I called Robbie Pratt. | ||
| I'm like, yo, we got the special! | ||
| He's like, let me see it. | ||
| You've been saying that, right? | ||
| Three weeks later, Dave calls me again. | ||
| I want to shoot the special over. | ||
| I'm like, why? | ||
| He said, I didn't like the production. | ||
| I'm like, motherfucker, you're the producer. | ||
| He was like, yeah, but it was a really small thing. | ||
| He was like, delighting. | ||
| And then it was people walking past, you know, doing the show. | ||
| And I was like, well, you remember live at Sunset Strip, Richard Pryor, one of the funniest lines you remember when he was like, look, white people left. | ||
| They came back. | ||
| Their seat's gone. | ||
| It was in the moment. | ||
| It was live. | ||
| It felt live. | ||
| That's where I thought that felt live. | ||
| He was like, down there, we'll put it out. | ||
| But I'm telling you, if we're going to do it, we scratched the second one. | ||
| Cut to the third one. | ||
| And I think out of all the criticism and everything he said leading up to his reasons why he wanted to do it again, I think that I caught it. | ||
| And people's like, do you think that was your best? | ||
| In that moment, that night, it was the best I could be that night. | ||
| Beautiful. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| Like, you know, we'll do shit. | ||
| You say, I'm not doing that joke before. | ||
| You know you've performed these jokes better, but can you capture it in that moment of that night? | ||
| And I think I caught a good vibe. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Beautiful. | |
| Donnell, I love you. | ||
| You're not going to watch it. | ||
| I love you. | ||
| I have to take a leak, and we've got to end this. | ||
| We've got to wrap this up. | ||
| No problem. | ||
| Thank you very much. | ||
| Tell everybody the name of it. | ||
| It's a new day on Netflix. | ||
| There it is. | ||
| It's a new day. | ||
| That's another sharp suit. | ||
| I got two suits for two different situations. | ||
| The yellow in the pocket. | ||
| I like it. | ||
| What's the button say? | ||
| DR. It's my logo. | ||
| Oh, nice. | ||
| Yep. | ||
| Proud of that. | ||
| Finally got it done. | ||
| Beautiful. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Thank you. | |
| Thank you, brother. | ||
|
unidentified
|
All right. |
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