Oct. 26, 2014 - The Joe Rogan Experience
02:54:37
Participants
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| Speaker | Time | Text |
|---|---|---|
| I mean, we're on. | ||
| Alright, ladies and gentlemen, this is a clusterfuck of a podcast, but it's going to be awesome. | ||
| There's a lot of fucking people here. | ||
| This is a fight companion podcast brought to you by Onnit. | ||
| Use the code to save 10% off any and all supplements. | ||
|
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Oh shit! | |
| Human optimization time! | ||
| Listen, we got a fucking stacked house. | ||
| To my left, the master, my brother from another mother, Mr. Eddie Bravo is here. | ||
| Ian McCall's friend, Kamal. | ||
|
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Kareem. | |
| Kareem. | ||
| Kamal Abdul-Jabbar. | ||
| I knew it was one of those. | ||
| Just met him. | ||
| Ian McCall, of course, one of the baddest motherfuckers on the planet Earth. | ||
|
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Next to him, Big Brown is in the house, bitches! | |
| What? | ||
| What? | ||
| No! | ||
|
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No! | |
| Not just one of the top UFC heavyweight contenders in the fucking world! | ||
| Preparing for his next big fight with Travis Brown. | ||
| Gonna be very confusing calling that. | ||
| Big Brown! | ||
|
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Don't fuck it up! | |
| Big Brown! | ||
| I mean, Travis Brown is... | ||
| Whatever. | ||
| And next to him, of course, my other brother, Mr. Aubrey Marcus, Warrior Poet US on Twitter. | ||
| Follow him. | ||
| He puts out great links. | ||
| And his gal Whitney, right below, she's here, fresh off of a jiu-jitsu lesson. | ||
| Just competing in a tournament herself. | ||
| We're pretty and fucks bitches up! | ||
| And we're about to start the very first fight. | ||
| If you've ever heard one of these podcasts before, don't expect any deep insight to the nature of the universe. | ||
| Most of it is people getting drunk watching fights. | ||
| So, we already did it, man. | ||
| I did it. | ||
| Oh, and NIT. Use the code word broken. | ||
| We don't have any anymore. | ||
| We got Alpha Brain all up in this bitch. | ||
| We got boxes, son. | ||
| We got all... | ||
| Goddamn, look at that booty. | ||
| You just get an alpha brain. | ||
| You would get a fucking mad rush of human neurotransmitters. | ||
| Alright, first round's about to start. | ||
| They just touched gloves. | ||
| The time says 4.55 right now. | ||
| So if you're syncing up... | ||
| The thing about the internet, if you're watching it on the internet... | ||
| We're about maybe 10 or 15 seconds slower because there's a lag between it uploading to Ustream and we're watching it right now. | ||
| So it's the very first round of the very first fight. | ||
| It's Diego... | ||
| What is the fight? | ||
| Diego Ferreira... | ||
| Hold on a second. | ||
| I'll tell you any minute now, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
| What's that? | ||
| How much what? | ||
| I bet on Ferreira. | ||
| These motherfuckers are gambling. | ||
| Diego Ferreira and Benil Dariush. | ||
| I do not know much about these gentlemen. | ||
|
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Ben is a badass. | |
| I've had the privilege of rolling with him a few times. | ||
| Benil. | ||
| You call him Benny? | ||
| And he is the gentleman in the black shorts. | ||
| Fiera is undefeated. | ||
| Yeah, I've seen Diego Ferreira fight before. | ||
| He's a little monster. | ||
| He's got very good jiu-jitsu, too. | ||
| Very good jiu-jitsu. | ||
| Good striking, too. | ||
| Like, throws hard shots, but nasty jiu-jitsu. | ||
|
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A couple years ago, Benny went up against Kron and lost by advantage. | |
| If you saw the fight, you would have seen that the advantage given wasn't a legit advantage. | ||
| There was a sweep that Benny wasn't given the points to. | ||
| Really, really good fight. | ||
| Real quick, my boy Neil Magny won his fifth straight. | ||
|
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TKO, third round, son. | |
| Yeah, no shit, right? | ||
| The Gazelle. | ||
| That's five this year. | ||
| Five in a row. | ||
| That's pretty amazing. | ||
| He's just not as flashy, so a lot of people don't talk about him. | ||
| Like you said, you didn't even know who he is. | ||
| I know he is. | ||
| I mean, I... But I don't watch... | ||
| I barely keep up with anything now. | ||
| Now I know why these... | ||
| Why is this not on? | ||
| I don't hear him. | ||
| Check, check, check. | ||
| There we go. | ||
| Check. | ||
| Oh, I'm sorry. | ||
| You know what? | ||
| I think that there's a chance. | ||
| Now it's really loud. | ||
| The reason why there's saturation of the UFC, I think that was done on purpose, so we wouldn't watch anything else. | ||
| I can barely keep up with the UFC. How the fuck am I going to watch Bellator? | ||
| No, you know what it is? | ||
| I'll tell you exactly what it is. | ||
| There's only a certain amount of fighters. | ||
| There's hundreds and hundreds of fighters. | ||
| And if you just let those dudes just run free, they get scooped up by other organizations. | ||
| And the reality is there's a lot of fucking top talent out there. | ||
| There's a lot. | ||
| If you want to have an organization that has 300 fighters on contract, you've got to have an assload of events. | ||
| Plus, the idea is just keep spreading this shit everywhere. | ||
| Put on fights everywhere. | ||
| Fight card, international, two at a time. | ||
| When people talk about, on the internet all the time, it's a known subject. | ||
| What's up with the saturation with the UFC? Do you like it? | ||
| In America, internationally it's growing like a motherfucker. | ||
| Everyone's talking about it. | ||
| International it's like this. | ||
| America it's like this. | ||
| Is it good? | ||
| Was there a plan to oversaturate? | ||
| They don't believe it's oversaturating. | ||
| They don't believe it's oversaturating. | ||
| They're putting on good fights. | ||
| They're just trying to put on as many fights as they should. | ||
| It's tougher for them to get famous. | ||
| The fighters. | ||
| Is that true? | ||
| Look at Conor McGregor. | ||
| The motherfucker got famous immediately. | ||
| Well, now you're talking about the exception. | ||
| But Neil Magny, we go five years ago, he's 5-0. | ||
| You know, he's on the front cover of Fighters Only doing shit. | ||
| People want to see finishers. | ||
| It's possible, yeah. | ||
| 5-0, bro? | ||
|
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That's pretty good. | |
| He wins by decision every time. | ||
| No, he just won by TKO tonight. | ||
| He won his last fight by TKO in Australia. | ||
|
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Did he win TKO tonight? | |
| Yeah. | ||
| He was on the roll. | ||
| We're talking about him here. | ||
|
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5 in a row, son. | |
| He's got nice skills. | ||
| He's got great cardio. | ||
| Well, the only reason we're talking about is because he was a trained partner of mine. | ||
| Other than that, I wouldn't be talking about him. | ||
| He just blew his ass But you know what I'm saying? | ||
| How come a guy like him, who's been winning, how come he doesn't get as much attention as a guy like Conor? | ||
| Yeah, exactly. | ||
| Like John Fitch. | ||
| John Fitch was a popular fighter. | ||
| I mean, it depends. | ||
| Well, he was successful. | ||
|
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Successful fighter. | |
| He was still popular, though. | ||
| He fought for a title. | ||
| Strong walkout song. | ||
| But you don't have to be... | ||
|
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Very strong. | |
| Yeah, very strong. | ||
| Rusty Chains, come on, son. | ||
|
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Johnny Cash. | |
| But he wasn't exciting, so people wanted to see him lose. | ||
| I like this style, because no one can stop it. | ||
| Yeah, that's what I like about it. | ||
| The style tests people. | ||
| You know, he's unbelievably tough. | ||
| He fucking stays on guys. | ||
| He grinds. | ||
| Dana White said, though, ooh, let this motherfucker lose. | ||
| As soon as he lost. | ||
|
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Oh, his eyes cut your cut. | |
| That's the craziest thing about him. | ||
| Nasty. | ||
| This is a good top game, man. | ||
| Real good balance. | ||
|
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Oh, shit. | |
| He trains a stand-up with Rafael. | ||
| He's awesome. | ||
| How about Damien Maia? | ||
| John Fitch is John Fitch. | ||
|
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Right? | |
| John Fitch, John Fitch. | ||
| John Fitch, John Fitch. | ||
| True. | ||
| Ferreira's holding onto a leg here. | ||
| A monkey fucking a footballer. | ||
| Stepping over. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
|
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He won't get caught in that. | |
| Ferreira's good, man. | ||
| Never say never, son. | ||
|
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Yeah. | |
| His knee is so flexible. | ||
| All I would go for are knee bars, leg locks all day on him. | ||
| He'd twist out. | ||
| They'd be twisted so far backwards. | ||
| For sure send his coach a text right now. | ||
|
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Just crazy. | |
| What is up with dudes who have super flexible joints? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Like Hoyler. | ||
| I think you're born that way. | ||
| You remember when Hoyler fought Sakuraba and he had his arm bent way the fuck behind his back? | ||
| You're for sure born that way. | ||
| Is that what it is? | ||
| Or is it just years and years of jiu-jitsu? | ||
| Is it like starting as a baby? | ||
| I think jiu-jitsu helps. | ||
| Like, Eddie, you're so flexible down there. | ||
| Don't you think you were born that way? | ||
| Were you old? | ||
| Were you old born flexible? | ||
| Ooh, I disagree. | ||
| Everybody was born flexible. | ||
| My man, you look stiff walking in. | ||
| You were not born flexible. | ||
|
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I am not. | |
| Yeah, you look super stiff walking in. | ||
| I'm with you. | ||
| I think all babies are born flexible, but some just keep using it, and some don't use it, and they lose it. | ||
|
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You grow. | |
| It's how you grow up. | ||
| You don't use it, you lose it. | ||
| We gotta be real careful about not talking over each other. | ||
| Sorry. | ||
| And for me, I used to bite my toenails with my feet. | ||
| That was my bad habit. | ||
|
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I did, too. | |
| But that kept the flexibility while all the kids started running. | ||
| That's so disgusting. | ||
| I did the exact same thing when I was a kid. | ||
| That's so fucking disgusting. | ||
| And I was the cutest rubber guard. | ||
| Oh, God. | ||
| Being a disgusting toe sucker. | ||
| I would do it in private, though. | ||
| I don't do it anymore. | ||
| You just did it. | ||
| I had to make sure my mom... | ||
| Because our doors didn't have locks. | ||
| You had to make sure your mom's not going to walk down. | ||
| Were both hands on your feet, or were you... | ||
| I'd bite my toenails. | ||
| Flexibility is something you can achieve that a lot of people don't work hard enough at. | ||
| I agree with that, Joe, but at the same time, some guys are freakishly... | ||
| I'm telling you, he's been doing it forever, though. | ||
| I'm not that flexible. | ||
| It's not like explosive. | ||
| It's not like that. | ||
| That's a different animal. | ||
| Listen, Brandon. | ||
| Anybody can get flexible if you stretched. | ||
| Rubber guard, kick to the head. | ||
| Everybody knows that. | ||
| When you walk into a kickboxing school, you can't kick to the head. | ||
|
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Dude, this guy Benny is badass. | |
| And eventually you'll be able to kick to the head. | ||
| He's the real deal. | ||
| Dude, that fucking shot was sweet. | ||
|
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You roll with that guy, he just doesn't quit. | |
| He's good, isn't he? | ||
| He's undefeated in the UFC. You know what I think, man? | ||
| I think... | ||
| There's people that just don't put in the effort and they just accept the fact that they're not flexible. | ||
| Remember that dude that we had, the big football player guy who got stupid flexible over the course of like a year? | ||
| He had terrible flexibility. | ||
| He wouldn't stop stretching and he got mad flexible in a year. | ||
| He was like a soldier. | ||
| Some people get to load, the goal is to get to load. | ||
| Dude, it was huge. | ||
| He was built like you. | ||
| He was a giant dude. | ||
| He was like 250. We used to call it riding the bull when we would fucking roll with that guy. | ||
| If a guy came to you and you were going to take him under your wing and you hooked him up with a kickboxing trainer and he came up to you and said, hey, I can't kick to the head, man. | ||
| I don't know what to do. | ||
| What would you tell him? | ||
| Retire. | ||
| He's the pessimism of doom. | ||
|
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Exactly. | |
| Oh! | ||
| Damn! | ||
| I would say beat it, nerd. | ||
| Benny just cracked him with that knee. | ||
| Dude, he was dominating him on the ground, too. | ||
| I was really surprised by how he took him down and then got his back and was hanging on to him. | ||
| Where's this kid from? | ||
|
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He started with... | |
| On the mic, son. | ||
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He started with Bruno Mammut at Half Gracie. | |
| Nice. | ||
| Half Gracie makes a lot of killers. | ||
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Yeah. | |
| He's got a lot of killers up there in Northern California. | ||
| He had Cameron Earl up there. | ||
| He had a lot of dudes up there, right? | ||
| David Terrell. | ||
| He's out of there. | ||
| Dave Camarillo. | ||
| Dan Camarillo. | ||
| Animals up there, dude. | ||
| Gumby. | ||
| Scott Nelson. | ||
| Well, Half was mad at BJ when BJ left and went to Nova Uniao, right? | ||
| Remember that? | ||
| Called him a traitor? | ||
| I don't know the details of that. | ||
| Yeah, hopefully they worked it out. | ||
|
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I'm talking about the one in... | |
| Nice body kick. | ||
| Off Tustin. | ||
| Anaheim Hills. | ||
| Oh, whose teacher's there? | ||
|
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That was Bruno Mamouli. | |
| Oh, okay. | ||
|
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Yeah, yeah. | |
| But he also trains with Rafael now at Kings. | ||
| Oh, okay. | ||
| Rafael Cordero? | ||
|
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Yeah. | |
| He's a good guy, man. | ||
| He's a sweetheart. | ||
|
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Yeah, I've tattooed him and his wife a bunch of times. | |
| Oh, you're a tattoo artist? | ||
|
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Yeah, yeah, yeah. | |
| He better be, otherwise he just had something vulgar. | ||
| Fucking a dude and his wife. | ||
| That's so rude, but you've got to keep that shit quiet. | ||
| Yeah, I appreciate it. | ||
| Fucking a dude and his wife. | ||
| You gotta fucking be a little shy about that. | ||
| Hey, do you guys party? | ||
| That'd be great. | ||
| Do you have two hours? | ||
| Absolutely not. | ||
| She had no idea what that meant, and we were by ourselves at a club in Tahoe, and some couple comes up all cooked out of their gourd. | ||
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Oh, no. | |
| You guys party. | ||
| She's like, oh, yeah. | ||
| She's like, you want to have fun? | ||
| And I'm like, no, no, no. | ||
| We don't party. | ||
| Yeah, that's a different party. | ||
| That's a bummer. | ||
| That's a bummer. | ||
| Yes and no. | ||
| His wife is like 50 with just perfect cement tits, like five-year-old tits with a tiny little dress on. | ||
|
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I was going to say, one with a trade-off never works. | |
| It never works either. | ||
| And then, of course, 30 minutes later we look up at another table and they have swapped another couple with women on the show's lap. | ||
| Of course. | ||
| I'm not mad at that. | ||
| I'm not mad at that. | ||
| Cocaine makes things happen. | ||
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It does. | |
| It just does. | ||
| But why is it the ugly ones you want to switch up? | ||
| Because they don't give a fuck, dude. | ||
| When I was in Tampa, I was doing stand-up in Tampa and they were all ugly. | ||
| There was like 40 of them. | ||
| This couple. | ||
| 20 on each side. | ||
| 20 guys, 20 girls. | ||
| And they were all swingers. | ||
| And they wanted to take us to a swinger place. | ||
| It was me and Matty Kirsch. | ||
| And we were like, what? | ||
| Look at you fucking monsters. | ||
| It's like that scene in Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas when Hunter Thompson's on acid. | ||
|
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We're just checking into the hotel, and the lizards are fucking... | |
| There's blood on the floor. | ||
| Tell me about the golf shoes! | ||
|
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One of the best scenes ever. | |
| One of the best scenes ever. | ||
| I think when you're that, you know, you're fucked up, and you're old, and you're a swinger, like, you're just a mess. | ||
| You'll just fuck anybody. | ||
| Anybody's fucking... | ||
| They just put lipstick on. | ||
| We're good. | ||
|
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Yeah, I was like, oh, for sure, pile driving my wife. | |
| You've been with it for 30 years, son. | ||
| He doesn't want to fuck his wife now. | ||
| There comes a point where, you know, there's like 10 years where you... | ||
| You might be thinking about it, but you won't pull the trigger. | ||
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After like 20 years, like, dude, bang the shit out of her, dude. | |
| If that means I can fuck someone else, hell yeah! | ||
| I can fuck anybody else! | ||
| All I gotta do is let her bang other dudes. | ||
|
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Sold. | |
| Fuck yeah! | ||
|
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That's how swingers get started. | |
| It's a bunch of dudes. | ||
| A bunch of dudes are sick of banging their wives. | ||
| That's tough. | ||
|
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You get to keep your wife and have sex with others. | |
| You heard about the key party? | ||
| Well, all you gotta do is let her bang let it do. | ||
| Yeah, they used to do those in the 70s, right? | ||
| Everybody puts their keys in a pile. | ||
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You know what I mean? | |
| Hey, you guys don't have headphones on, right? | ||
| So you don't realize what a clusterfuck this is. | ||
| There's two separate conversations going on at the exact same time. | ||
| I'm talking about a key party, sex party. | ||
| He's talking about a swingers party. | ||
| It's the swingers party. | ||
| They would all throw keys into a bucket. | ||
| And whoever got, you know, you just pick whichever person you're going home with. | ||
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Well, you better make sure it's a bucket. | |
| Yeah. | ||
|
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Well, if you pull the keys to some big warlock, like, yeah. | |
| Tough, tough action. | ||
| It's life. | ||
| Hopefully it hurts her pussy and she doesn't want any more of that. | ||
| She goes back to your regular dick. | ||
| I'd act sick. | ||
| Act sick when you look at that. | ||
| Cha-pow! | ||
|
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Who's that? | |
| Oh damn, they got someone with boot tags. | ||
| That's a Brazilian girl. | ||
| Damn! | ||
| I have to have an ass to be a Brazilian girl. | ||
| I think Jenny Andrade. | ||
| Oh, he's a voluptuous octagon girl. | ||
| We haven't seen that since Ally. | ||
| She's built correctly. | ||
| Remember Ally? | ||
| That's true. | ||
| Yes, I do. | ||
| So Ferreira has a mouse on that left eye, man. | ||
| Remember, like seven years ago? | ||
| Yeah, she had a beautiful body. | ||
| Damn, Anna face. | ||
| Look at his left eye, man. | ||
| He caught a bunch of shit in that round, right? | ||
| Didn't he get tacked? | ||
| That's a good fucking leg kick, too. | ||
| Good defense, too, man. | ||
| Oh, he came over the top there. | ||
| But that was a lot of energy and not a lot of results. | ||
| Good defense. | ||
| And he landed a vicious fucking leg kick right before that flurry. | ||
| Those kicks are way too slow. | ||
| Powerful. | ||
| Ian McCall, hummingbird-like speed. | ||
| These guys might be a little fatiguing. | ||
| Yeah, well, Ferreira just went over a big charge. | ||
| And Darouche, how do you say his last name? | ||
| Darouche? | ||
| Darouche? | ||
| He blocked most of that. | ||
| Nice, dude. | ||
| The cardio on these guys is fucking incredible. | ||
|
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Ooh, nice knee to the body by Ferreira. | |
| How do they keep going forever? | ||
| The pulsing, breathing country of Brazil behind them. | ||
| Those are so important, those moments, right? | ||
| In the scramble, in a takedown, the guy who lands the hard shots. | ||
| Especially those hard knees to the body, if you could time it just right. | ||
| You know there's going to be that opening. | ||
| You know there's going to be that brief window to get something in. | ||
| Scrambles everything. | ||
| Scrambles a lot, man. | ||
| At a high level. | ||
| And it tells, like, who is in, like, really tip-top shape and fucking is really driven and wants it and who's looking to take a little bit of a break. | ||
| Who's looking to, like, maybe not push as hard to capitalize on those moments. | ||
|
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Yeah. | |
| Because those moments are going to gas you. | ||
| You know, if you're tired already, it's a mad scramble and there's that pause. | ||
| Do I take a breath here? | ||
| Or boom! | ||
| Do I fire the shot? | ||
| And at a high level in those scrambles, you're going to have this small window to attack the guy. | ||
| These guys are too good, man. | ||
| Anderson Silva, Stefan Bonner, there's in that scramble, he landed that fucking vicious knee to the body, and that was it. | ||
| Most submissions you see at a high level are during the scramble. | ||
| Yeah, and when guys have that good pointy fucking knee to the body, you know who's got a really good one? | ||
| Cowboy. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Cowboy's got a beautiful one off that left leg. | ||
| He keeps guys from coming in. | ||
| You know, as you're charging in, he's pawing at you with a jab and you come to close that distance and he catches you with that body knee. | ||
| Boom! | ||
| Overeem's got a vicious one too. | ||
| Charles Brown's ain't bad either. | ||
| It's not bad. | ||
| Dude, Overeem, it seems like he's just having the hardest time taking punches these days. | ||
| It's just not the same guy. | ||
| Wherever they hit in his face, too, it hurts. | ||
| It just puts him out. | ||
| It's crazy. | ||
| Well, that one against Ben Rothwell, and I never defend Overeem, ever, because he's done so much steroids. | ||
| However, when he fought Ben Rothwell, he got hit behind the air. | ||
| So people were like, oh, his chin's out of control. | ||
| When a 265-pound man hits you behind the ear, it's going to fuck you up, man. | ||
| It just is. | ||
| So I don't think it's a matter of a chin in that fight. | ||
| Look at Cain Velasquez. | ||
| Takes bombs. | ||
| Junior caught him right behind the ear and just went down. | ||
| It wobbles you. | ||
| They're not out, but they're wobbling and they get TKO'd. | ||
| Yeah, I just feel like, you go back to Overeem vs. | ||
| Brock Lesnar, and you are looking at maybe the scariest fucking heavyweight of all time. | ||
| Right? | ||
| I 100% agree. | ||
| Dude! | ||
| Just 263, he weighs in at 263, and he looks like a goddamn cartoon. | ||
| He does. | ||
| He looks like a Greek statue. | ||
| And he's throwing bombs. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It just doesn't even look like a real human. | ||
| I can't respect that though, man. | ||
| Now give all of us the same supplements he was on. | ||
| Let's see what's up. | ||
| That's what I'm proposing. | ||
| I'm proposing everybody get on steroids. | ||
|
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Give us all the shit. | |
| I'm tired of this nature bullshit, bro. | ||
| Why don't we all go back to not training? | ||
| What the fuck are we doing? | ||
| No one's trying to get better? | ||
| I'm talking about everybody being on steroids. | ||
| Fuck it. | ||
| Let's just do this. | ||
| I'm kidding, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
| Please, don't make this a fucking main page article on one of your goofy fucking online MMA websites and pretend I'm being serious. | ||
| No, I don't believe that everybody should be on steroids. | ||
| We're drinking. | ||
| You said it, so it's too late. | ||
| I would like to say that on a broadcast, though. | ||
|
unidentified
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Fuck it! | |
| Fuck it, everybody get on steroids! | ||
| Obviously I don't do it. | ||
| You're in jail like hell yeah. | ||
| They're working prides. | ||
| It's fucked up, man. | ||
| Like, Vanderlei Silva is banned for life. | ||
| That's fucked up. | ||
| That's what's up, man. | ||
| That's fucked up. | ||
| What he's done for the sport, too? | ||
| Crazy! | ||
| Unbelievable. | ||
| Ridiculous. | ||
| You can't run from a drug test, but I can't support that. | ||
| Suspend him for a year. | ||
| Spend him for a year without even testing him. | ||
| I'm 100% down with that. | ||
| It sends a very clear message. | ||
| The guy can't earn money fighting for a year. | ||
| He's got to go and do seminars and all that stuff. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh! | |
| Oh, Ferrer got tagged. | ||
| That same eye, too. | ||
| His hand was on the mat. | ||
| It went down. | ||
| No, he was touching it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He was touching it. | |
| I saw it. | ||
| His eye's already swollen up. | ||
|
unidentified
|
But I just think that a year, man, a year is a good... | |
| He wasn't touching it! | ||
| A year, maybe $100,000 fine if you want to make it steep. | ||
| Wow, that's steep. | ||
| Well, he got steep! | ||
| 60 grand anyway, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Brandon. | |
| Your boy, uh, fucking Benny? | ||
| That's how you say it? | ||
| Benny. | ||
| Benny Darouche? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Darouche, yeah. | |
| He's a bad motherfucker, dude. | ||
| And this is his first UFC fight, huh? | ||
| No. | ||
| How many other fights has he had? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I think he's got like four or five. | |
| No. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Nope. | |
| Last year I was at an event corner and he was on a smaller show. | ||
| No. | ||
| I think he's done four. | ||
| Yeah, he's done four. | ||
| This is his fourth one. | ||
| In the UFC? Yeah. | ||
| Damn. | ||
| Damn. | ||
| Sir, you are dead wrong, man. | ||
| He lost once to Ramsey. | ||
| He got KO'd. | ||
| Wow, he got KO'd by Ramsey? | ||
| I mean, I'm so impressed with this guy, man. | ||
| I'm surprised that Ramsey got him. | ||
| What's his overall record? | ||
| How many has he won? | ||
| Good question. | ||
| He is 8-1-0. | ||
| 8-1-0. | ||
| So Ramsey's the only guy to beat him. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| And I'm fucking super... | ||
| Oh! | ||
| Good catch, though, Doug. | ||
| Dude, my reflexes are still... | ||
| Now that everyone's getting busted with steroids, and there's new tests, and everyone's getting busted, do you think very few guys are doing steroids now? | ||
| I think it makes it tougher, but listen, professional sports, it's part of the game. | ||
| Whether you're in the Olympics, NFL, NBA, it's part of the game. | ||
| I did steroids right before this podcast, just so I could be up for it. | ||
| How many fighters do you think that there's 10 UFC fighters that just got off it because they didn't want to get busted? | ||
| Quite a bit. | ||
| I wish I knew, man. | ||
| They got off before they got busted? | ||
| I think some guys were just getting off to get off because that's, like you said, that was part of the game. | ||
| A lot of fucking people do steroids. | ||
| In every sport. | ||
| Like, I mean, you go to any sport. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What percentage do you think it is, personally, in MMA? MMA? Maybe... | |
| Maybe turn the... | ||
| Sorry, I got distracted. | ||
| That's a bitch called it. | ||
| Yeah, bitch. | ||
| She's a beast, man. | ||
| She is. | ||
| She throws bombs. | ||
| She fought in Sacramento, too, right? | ||
| She's got those tree trunk legs, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'd say 50% of UFC fighters don't do steroids. | |
| I think it depends on weight class. | ||
| Yeah, it's true. | ||
| I'd waste weight class also. | ||
| What do you think most of the steroids is prominent? | ||
|
unidentified
|
85? | |
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Why would you say that? | |
| I'm curious, actually, why the weight class has an issue with why that would be. | ||
| I mean, look at the guys. | ||
| If you just look at people who have been caught, it's usually the heavier weight class. | ||
| Yeah, that's true. | ||
| When that Ali Bagatinov got caught, that Russian dude on EPO, what the fuck? | ||
| You're 125 pounds. | ||
| What are you doing taking EPO? Well, he's going with Mighty Mouse, and his game is very kinetic. | ||
| I don't give a fuck. | ||
| If you don't have the cardio, at 125 pounds, you gotta take EPO. For sure, just go do something else. | ||
| You know what it is, oh man? | ||
| I think it's first fight that he's fighting five rounds. | ||
| Probably worried about that. | ||
| And also, he's very physical. | ||
| Like, everything he does, like... | ||
| 100%, yeah. | ||
| Where Mighty Mouse is loose as fuck. | ||
| It's very technical. | ||
| I hear you. | ||
| I get all this. | ||
| These are all great points. | ||
| You're 125 pounds. | ||
| No, you're right. | ||
| You're right. | ||
|
unidentified
|
100%. | |
| You have cardio four days. | ||
| You're right. | ||
| It's what you do. | ||
| First of all, and I don't give a fuck if you're 300 pounds or 200 pounds. | ||
| You're not supposed to cheat. | ||
| So he cheated, he fucked up, he did a bad thing. | ||
| And when you're cheating, it's not just that everybody's doing it. | ||
| Here's the deal. | ||
| You're going to be able to do damage that you wouldn't have been able to do. | ||
| Let's just be honest. | ||
| Your opponent is going to suffer. | ||
| If you cheat, the reality is it's not like football. | ||
| It's not like you getting across a line quicker. | ||
| You're going to land shots that you wouldn't have been able to land. | ||
| I mean, all speculation aside about individuals that we can see pre and post getting popped. | ||
| There's plenty of examples to draw from. | ||
| We don't need to talk about any of them. | ||
| But the reality is, they're bad because your opponent can get hit when they might not be getting hit. | ||
| But this is the problem, it's the training. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Like Vitor Belfort spinning heel kick. | |
| Well, if he's on steroids, he's going to be able to practice that, what, 500 times more, 1,000 times more? | ||
| So it's going to be in his wheelhouse now, you know what I'm saying? | ||
| Now it's in his book of tools. | ||
| What was crazy is he didn't have to be on steroids. | ||
| He got legal testosterone, which is so squirrely. | ||
| The fact that they allowed that for so long is so squirrely. | ||
| Look, the shit works. | ||
| And especially when you're on like Vitor levels. | ||
| Vitor had 1475 was his blood level. | ||
| A normal person's like 600. That's like a healthy man. | ||
| Yeah, not in training. | ||
| When you're in training, you're worn the fuck out. | ||
| You're beat down, man. | ||
| 200, 300. Yeah. | ||
| So when you're jacked up like that, yeah man, you can make some gains. | ||
| He looks like a welterweight now. | ||
| I love Vitor. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He does. | |
| I've trained with Vitor, a good guy. | ||
| He looks like a welterweight now. | ||
| It's insane. | ||
| You can't count him out, though. | ||
| You cannot count him out. | ||
| Hell no. | ||
| You can't count him out. | ||
| His fucking striking is nasty. | ||
| He's kicking you in the fucking head. | ||
| Yep. | ||
| His striking is nasty. | ||
| What if he goes down really easily? | ||
| Well, that would be rough. | ||
| People are going to be afraid to get off steroids. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You get off, they're going to just say, I'm going to stay on. | |
| If I get off, I'm going to get crushed. | ||
| So I'm going to stay on. | ||
| He's in trouble, man, because Weidman's not on that shit, and Weidman is a fucking monster. | ||
| He's a beast. | ||
| He's a horrible matchup, even You know what that's like, man? | ||
| They just don't comment, right? | ||
| That's like gay dudes who are anti-gay preachers. | ||
| They always exist. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Have you seen a preacher that's like, we've got to stop these homosexuals! | |
| They're running around having ass sex and creating Ebola! | ||
| Those motherfuckers, those motherfuckers are almost all like, cut! | ||
| Cut! | ||
| Give me a dick, quick! | ||
| Have you seen the African? | ||
| Oh yeah. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They eat the poo-poo. | |
| Eat the poo-poo! | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| He sticks his fist in his anise. | ||
| It's so awful. | ||
| Makako, man. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| Makako's in this dude's corner. | ||
| Makako's still rocking it after all these years. | ||
| Makako knocked out Jacare in Jacare's first MMA fight, man. | ||
| Damn. | ||
| That dude's been all round. | ||
| He had wars with Pele back when Pele was the fucking man. | ||
| When Pele was the shoot-the-box man. | ||
| Pele brought in Anderson Silva, apparently. | ||
| That's the word. | ||
| He was a badass back then. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fuck yeah, he was. | |
| Remember when he knocked out Matt Hughes, that flying knee? | ||
| God damn, Pele was... | ||
| He had vicious Muay Thai. | ||
| Vicious. | ||
| Is that Drake? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Jake... | |
| No, that's not Drake. | ||
| Jake... | ||
| His name is Lucas Martins. | ||
| Both of these... | ||
| Both these guys are tough as shit. | ||
| Darren Elkins is just fucking country tough. | ||
| Straight country tough. | ||
| He's one of those dudes, you fucking, you meet him in some dirty honky-tonk with sawdust on the floor. | ||
| Like, come on, man, you wanna go do this? | ||
| You wanna go fucking do this outside? | ||
| You're like, I'll be right back. | ||
| I'm gonna knock this fucking dude out. | ||
| First pump, hit him in the forehead, your hand breaks, he smiles at you. | ||
| You came out to that country song, too. | ||
| You still wanna do this? | ||
| You broke your hand, didn't you? | ||
| Doesn't get tired. | ||
| Takes bombs. | ||
| But he's gotta fight Drake. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Drake makes shit rhyme really good. | ||
| 25 sitting on 25 mil. | ||
| He's a good wrestler too. | ||
| Those wrestlers, man, guys who have that background in fucking amateur wrestling are so used to torture. | ||
| I went to a wrestling room the other day. | ||
| My kickboxing coach, training partner, Romeo Danza, he's got a handful of titles and shit. | ||
| His daughter is a freshman. | ||
| And we're sitting at the pool and the bell rings. | ||
| Oh, this is a wrestling practice now. | ||
| I was like, what? | ||
| A freshman at the fucking high school. | ||
| So I'm like, we're going to the room. | ||
| I'm going there and check all these fucking kids. | ||
| And I realized why I'm so fucked up. | ||
| It's wrestling. | ||
| That's what fucked up your head? | ||
| Oh, it just made me crazy. | ||
| Sitting in some hot-ass room, fucking getting tortured and getting beat up. | ||
| My coach was a world champion at 17 from Iran, and then he left. | ||
| He left the country and then couldn't wrestle in the Olympics, which he probably would have won because he didn't have his green card. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| So he would bring in all these super badasses to just kick the shit out of me my whole high school career. | ||
| They have a deep, deep background in wrestling, man. | ||
| They fucking tortured me. | ||
| Remember the Iron Sheik? | ||
| We're talking legit wrestling here, man. | ||
| The Iron Sheik was a legit wrestler. | ||
| I interviewed him. | ||
| I had him in a car. | ||
| He was legit. | ||
| Legit. | ||
| I'm not kidding you, man. | ||
| He was a world-class amateur wrestler. | ||
| I interviewed him for like an hour. | ||
| I don't want to know. | ||
| He's a good dude, man. | ||
| He came on stage with me in Toronto. | ||
| I did this weed show in Toronto. | ||
| They do this show. | ||
| It's like the underground comedy show. | ||
| They do it in a weed store. | ||
| And the weed store is like a bong shop in the front and a comedy club in the back. | ||
| And you go into the back and you can't see ten feet in front of you. | ||
| You are in the clouds, man. | ||
| I'm not joking. | ||
| It's ridiculous. | ||
| It's the worst hot box ever. | ||
| No ventilation whatsoever. | ||
| Every now and then again, they open up the back door so nobody dies. | ||
| That's it. | ||
| There's no air in the room. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You're breathing in weed. | |
| You're breathing in weed, breathing out weed. | ||
| The whole room is filled with weed. | ||
| The Iron Sheik was in there getting high as fuck. | ||
| And he came on stage while I was up there. | ||
| There's a video of it online. | ||
| It's hilarious. | ||
| Me and him just talking on stage. | ||
| But yeah, Iranians. | ||
| So imagine me at 15, 16, cutting weight in a fucking sauna, and I have some 40-year-old Iranian dude massaging me, rubbing my back in a credit card, down all my sweat, and people are looking at us like, what the fuck? | ||
| Why is that man making that little boy sweat? | ||
| Scratching that little boy. | ||
| Hey, sir, you can't buy him that way. | ||
| He'd be muttering to me in Farsi. | ||
| You can't just scan him, sir. | ||
| Cash only, sir. | ||
| If you want to fuck him, you're going to have to hold him down. | ||
| Oh, and I realized the same 24-hour fitness we always went to in Aliso Viejo was a gay hangout. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Holla! | |
| Eddie and I worked out at 24 Hour Fitness and there was this dude who was the manager there. | ||
| He was a cool guy. | ||
| We used to talk to him. | ||
| And they had sent him over from the Santa Monica place. | ||
| He was like a real personable, real friendly guy, real easy to like. | ||
| And so the Santa Monica place brought him in because they needed to get that place cleaned out because it had basically become just a fuckhouse. | ||
| They'd have to close the showers an hour to hose them down. | ||
| There'd be cum everywhere. | ||
| There'd be cum and condoms and more cum. | ||
| My buddy ended up working at the same place and they used to have to trap dudes, gay dudes that were fucking in the sauna and stuff. | ||
| Trapped them? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Call the cops and told the cops. | |
| That's how people die, bro. | ||
| Don't trap me in the sauna and make me fuck my way out. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I will do it. | |
| Are you ready? | ||
| Are you ready? | ||
| You better let me out of here, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's a fucking great quote. | |
| Somebody has to take a picture of you with the meme. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Don't make me fuck my way out of here. | |
| Undergarden, make a meme of that, please. | ||
| Just a blurred out line. | ||
| Oh shit, that's funny. | ||
| Holy shit, that's funny. | ||
| Don't make me fuck my way out of here. | ||
| This dude was such a good guy. | ||
| And he was telling us that basically the gay guys had just had a run of the place. | ||
| They were just dominating the place. | ||
| Because it was all them. | ||
| And they realized, I don't think there's anybody straight here. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fuck it! | |
| Rock out with their cocks out. | ||
| I guess they probably had some gay managers and they had to clean that shit up and they brought in our friend. | ||
| I had to work out there once. | ||
| The gym that I normally worked out, they closed it for filming. | ||
| And I was with Larry. | ||
| This was back in the Larry days. | ||
| And Larry goes, dude, let's just fucking go to the West Hollywood one. | ||
| I go, dude, I'm not going to the West Hollywood one. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I've never been there. | |
| You just hear the stories. | ||
| I heard these stories. | ||
| I had to get that workout in, and then he talked me into it. | ||
| I go, fuck it, let's just go in there real quick. | ||
| Let's get our chest on and get the fuck out. | ||
| I swear to God, I was standing there, me and Larry were working on, you know, we were like benching like a 45 planar on each side, and a guy next to me had nothing. | ||
| Just dicks everywhere? | ||
| And he asked me, you know, he just asked me, he goes, what is this for? | ||
| Caught me off guard! | ||
| I go, it's for your chest and your packs. | ||
| You got me! | ||
| Why does it make my butt want to be filled? | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's for your chest! | |
| Fuck! | ||
| It just sounds like they're having a good time and someone fucking hated on them. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Exactly. | |
| Who's the snitch, man? | ||
| 100%. | ||
| Well, there was this one straight dude who worked out there that lived next door. | ||
| He was like, this is ridiculous. | ||
| Carey's getting his dick sucked in the sauna. | ||
| How do you line up the street? | ||
| This is bullshit. | ||
| This is my fucking home gym. | ||
| I was looking at this apartment. | ||
| There's a gym right next door. | ||
| The guy's from Wisconsin. | ||
| He doesn't know shit about fucking Santa Monica Boulevard. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's ridiculous. | |
| Everybody here looks really fit. | ||
| I guess I'm in a fit community. | ||
| Everyone's walking around with jean shorts on. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Shut up, jean shorts. | |
| Cut off jean shorts? | ||
| Rollerblading in jean shorts might be the gayest thing ever. | ||
| There's a millions of milkshakes right here. | ||
| You have to be sucking a dick while you're rollerblading to make it gayer. | ||
| Darren Elkins. | ||
| Probably happened. | ||
| Yeah, it's happened for sure. | ||
| Someone sucked a dick while rollerblading. | ||
| 100%. | ||
| 100%. | ||
| There's probably been a dude that was mounted on a dude's face like he's doing a flying triangle while they were rolling down Venice Boulevard. | ||
| It's probably happened. | ||
| In all the years that there have been blowjobs and rollerblades, it's for sure happened. | ||
| What percentage of flights, domestic flights, have gay sex going on in them? | ||
| One percent. | ||
| I'd say 60. No, I'd say 60. All the Stewarters are gay. | ||
| They're all gay. | ||
|
unidentified
|
60%. | |
| Stewart's or Stewart's? | ||
| And you know what I'm saying? | ||
| Come on. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Come on. | |
| That's got it. | ||
| They love fucking anonymous. | ||
| Like, you know what? | ||
| If we were all gay, we would all be into the same shit. | ||
| Guys were guys. | ||
| This room would be a mess. | ||
|
unidentified
|
We're all a very obvious type, too. | |
| Come on, what are they known for? | ||
| Anonymous sex in bathrooms and bathhouses and all that shit? | ||
| Oh yeah, man. | ||
| That's totally normal. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's how we would all be if we were all gay. | |
| If I was gay, I'd probably be doing the same shit. | ||
| My question is, even if you're not gay, it's kind of right. | ||
| We can't. | ||
| Chicks ain't down for that kind of stuff. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They don't want anonymous sex in bathrooms. | |
| Not all of them, my man. | ||
| Let's not generalize. | ||
| Let's not generalize. | ||
| Yeah, there's a couple... | ||
| That's making shit unusual. | ||
| You haven't seen my Instagram, my man. | ||
| Crackheads don't count. | ||
| You haven't seen my Instagram. | ||
| There's a few gals out there that just don't follow the rules. | ||
| And a lot of women get very upset at them. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Don't follow the rules? | |
| A lot of women get very upset at them. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Why is it a rule? | |
| Why there gotta be rules? | ||
| I don't think... | ||
| I'm with you, buddy. | ||
| I'm not trying to cock-block here. | ||
| I'm just trying to let you know... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Just saying, that's the exception. | |
| ...how the gals are looking at it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I would say... | |
| They're like, one of these bitches is fucking ruining the curve. | ||
| That's why when legalized prostitution moves into a country, chicks just get married. | ||
| Like, look, we just gotta lock this down. | ||
|
unidentified
|
We just... | |
| This is what it is. | ||
|
unidentified
|
My shit lost value. | |
| Can you imagine? | ||
| Your country's about to legalize prostitution with the overall consensus of women. | ||
| They gotta be worried. | ||
| They're on forums and shit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What does this mean? | |
| Some girls don't even care. | ||
| Like, I don't care. | ||
| Don't you see what this means? | ||
| They're not gonna need us anymore. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'd be like the Debo of whores. | |
| I'd walk up and be like, God damn it. | ||
| They do not want to see me. | ||
| How come you haven't called me in days? | ||
| Working like crazy. | ||
| Girls have zero power in countries where prostitution is illegal. | ||
| Like in Argentina, they have zero power. | ||
| There's nothing. | ||
| It's not a good thing. | ||
| That's how it works in those conquering countries. | ||
| That's what it was like back in the Genghis Khan days. | ||
| Feminism is what's keeping prostitution illegal. | ||
| Because if it became illegal... | ||
| We would just block them all on Twitter. | ||
| We'd never have to hear a word out of them. | ||
| They'd be like, yeah, keep yapping over there. | ||
| Why are feminists listening to your shit? | ||
| Because I got talked shit to for a while by some gay feminists. | ||
| You know what, man? | ||
| Last time I was under a family, I'm a homophobe. | ||
| No, you're not a homophobe. | ||
| I'm not into anybody who's only into one gender. | ||
| Oh, look at this. | ||
| He's trying to go with a ninja choke right there from the top. | ||
| Right there. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| Couldn't quite get it around. | ||
| He had his elbow in front of it instead of behind it. | ||
| You know what I feel like, man? | ||
| I'm not into dudes who are into men's rights either. | ||
| Guys who identify themselves as really... | ||
| He's going for it again on the other side, Eddie. | ||
| Guys who are really into men's rights. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Who's into men's rights? | |
| What do you mean? | ||
| There's groups. | ||
| Men's rights. | ||
| I was insulted by a feminist. | ||
| She called me an MRA. I didn't even have a conversation with her. | ||
| She misconstrues my point. | ||
| I'm not a men's right. | ||
| I didn't even know what an MRA was. | ||
| So I had to look it up. | ||
| I thought it was one of those meal packages you get when you're in the army. | ||
| MRE. Yeah, but it was a, um, it's a fucking bomb that hasn't been exploded. | ||
| It was a fucking men's rights advocate, and I went, no way. | ||
| Is that what she's saying? | ||
| And then I'm like, wow, how ironic is it that a feminist would be mocking a guy who's into male rights? | ||
| Like, are you telling me that men don't have any, like, what does that mean? | ||
| Men don't deserve rights? | ||
| Like, how could you be mocking someone? | ||
| Oh, you're one of those dumb, dumb MREs. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They're really confusing me, because some of the shit they say. | |
| Get you fucking out of here! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Ah! | |
| Somebody made the meme already. | ||
| Kid's looking very sexy in that picture. | ||
| Tell you what, a real cutie pie. | ||
| It was a good day on camera. | ||
| Stud muffin. | ||
| Looked perfectly bronzed. | ||
| Yeah, man. | ||
| You know, I think that a lot of feminists... | ||
| Feminism is women who identify themselves with being a feminist. | ||
| And as soon as you start doing that, it becomes like a thing you do. | ||
| Like, I'm into cosplay. | ||
| That's their thing. | ||
| Yeah, I'm into fucking... | ||
| I love bowling, you know? | ||
| For sure find something else to do. | ||
| I'm a feminist. | ||
| Like, you know, feminist blogger. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| Well, you know, I like to play pool. | ||
| Well, that's how they identify it, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Well, yeah, it sort of segregates you, though, too. | |
| Now it creates, it's like you're trying to, like, break that wall down. | ||
| Now you're creating a wall, I think, when you do shit like that, you know? | ||
| Or it lets you know to not hang out with her. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's too much work. | |
| We have no boyfriend. | ||
| No guy's gonna put up with that shit. | ||
| Yeah, those guys are gonna put up. | ||
| Fuck you, they're no guys. | ||
| No guy I know. | ||
| No guy I know. | ||
| But there's a lot of social, what they call social justice warriors. | ||
| These social justice warriors. | ||
| Yeah, white knights. | ||
| Fucking douchebags. | ||
| It's all men that, you know, under normal circumstances would starve to death. | ||
| They would, if we were all in hunting parties, they would be limping back there. | ||
| We'd send them. | ||
| People like us would be fucking eating them. | ||
| Something bad would happen. | ||
| Fucking them or eating them. | ||
| You'd be fucking them, I'd be eating them. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You want to eat a dude? | |
| Back in the day, the Spartan days, they would raid those cities. | ||
| Alright, fine, I'll fucking with you. | ||
| They'd fuck some dudes and eat them. | ||
| Can I ask Aubrey a question about stevia? | ||
| Maybe it's a different thing. | ||
| I want to ask you this question. | ||
| Stevia, good or bad? | ||
| It's good, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's good. | |
| It's not bad. | ||
| Why isn't vitamin water? | ||
| Because they use stevia. | ||
| Why aren't they blasting that? | ||
| For some reason, no one knows they use stevia. | ||
| They always use stevia. | ||
| But they use stevia, and then they use something else. | ||
| They use a bunch of sugar, too. | ||
| They use other stuff, too. | ||
| But they use stevia, but you would think that they would blast it. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| You've got to ask 50 Cent, man. | ||
| We're missing a good fucking fight, man. | ||
| You've got to ask 50 Cent. | ||
| We don't know. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Isn't that weird? | |
| I don't know what they're supposed to do. | ||
| Why wouldn't they be blasting it? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's not good for you, it's just not bad. | ||
| He's got really good shots, man. | ||
| He can take it, man. | ||
| That's part of the style. | ||
| Oh, that head kick rocked him, and that was behind the ear, too. | ||
| Oh, on the chin with that one. | ||
| He's just so damn tough, man. | ||
| So hard to finish that dude. | ||
| That was why it was so impressive. | ||
| He lost to Mendez. | ||
| Mendez lit him up, man. | ||
| Mendez looked like a monster in that fight. | ||
| Who's taking Mendez? | ||
| Anyone taking Mendez in here? | ||
| I'm taking Mendez. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Nope. | |
| I like you guys' style. | ||
| I don't think it's going to happen. | ||
| I like you guys' style. | ||
| He's a little bit like a drag racer, though. | ||
| You know, he's just going to fucking... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Strike boring it? | |
| Well, so is Aldo, by the way. | ||
| Aldo's a three-round motherfucker, and then the last two rounds, Ricardo Lamas was on top of him beating his ass in that fifth round, and that's reality. | ||
| The thing is, they say all the strides he's made, which he has, but he's not TJ. He's not going to move like that and beat... | ||
| He has more power, I feel like, though. | ||
| Oh, he does. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He definitely does. | |
| But I just don't... | ||
| I think Aldo's too good. | ||
| And I think Aldo has always been better than Burrell, anyways. | ||
| Technically. | ||
| Because he's so precise, you know? | ||
| Where Burrell's a little more wild and good. | ||
| They're both awesome. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I agree. | |
| But I think that I don't think... | ||
|
unidentified
|
He's more accurate. | |
| Yeah, I don't think Chad can beat Aldo. | ||
| Anyone can beat anybody, but I don't think he's going to. | ||
| I just think that he doesn't move like TJ. He's not going to outstrike Aldo, which I think he thinks he's going to. | ||
| He's got Master Splinter in his corner, though. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's true. | |
| I was wrong on TJ. I thought TJ was going to get beat up. | ||
| So I was wrong there. | ||
| What do you think about fucking Dominic Cruz? | ||
| God damn, did he look like a beast. | ||
| Proud of him, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, my bad. | |
| You want that, Steven? | ||
| Bro, I brought in Daniel Cormier to my camp. | ||
| Yeah, I saw the photo. | ||
| Yeah, and he brought in Dominic Cruz with him. | ||
| Dominic's trying to show us this footwork. | ||
| He's like, Sean, this is what you gotta do. | ||
| Show me in D.C. Like, real quick, man. | ||
| You're way smaller than us. | ||
| That stuff, it's just not gonna fit in our wheelhouse, my man. | ||
| Gustafson's trying to do that shit. | ||
| Yeah, but you know Travis. | ||
| Travis moves a lot like that. | ||
| I guess. | ||
| I guess. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I mean, yeah, that's like saying, yeah, and I throw a right hook like Mike Tyson. | |
| Yeah, we both throw right hooks. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| It's like, jeez, man. | ||
| He's pretty good at that Dominic Cruz thing. | ||
| He's alright. | ||
| I mean, it's a far cry from the original. | ||
| Dominic Cruz took it to another Dominic Cruz level the other day, though. | ||
| Dude, another level. | ||
| I've never been so happy for another fighter that I don't train with. | ||
| I was so happy for him. | ||
| That kid showed zero hesitation, too. | ||
| He came out guns blazing. | ||
| Just guns blazing. | ||
| A lot of tough guys, too. | ||
| Fuck, yeah. | ||
| Mitsugaki can take it. | ||
| He's a beast. | ||
| I know Uriah finished him, but he got his back and choked him, and, you know, Mitsugaki's just not the same kind of grappler Uriah is. | ||
| Oh, damn. | ||
| Bro, bring in DC into the camp. | ||
| Nice. | ||
| Monster. | ||
| Look at that fucking combo. | ||
| Monster, Joe. | ||
| Yeah, I'm sure. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm sure. | |
| Where's your camp at? | ||
| It's here, LA. I'm based at LA. Nice. | ||
| So, what is it like working out with him? | ||
| How's his knee? | ||
| His knee's 100%. | ||
| He rehabbed it? | ||
| Yeah, it's this pressure he brings. | ||
| I've never seen anything like it. | ||
| Never. | ||
| I've trained with a ton of guys. | ||
| That's Kane. | ||
| Dude, the pressure, he just keeps coming, keeps coming, keeps coming. | ||
| That's him and Kane, man. | ||
| Those guys, they're two werewolves. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yep. | |
| Who keeps coming? | ||
| Fuckin' attacking each other at night. | ||
| I brought Cormier in for my camp and he's a monster. | ||
| You ever watch them spar? | ||
| No, I wish. | ||
| I'd love to see that. | ||
| Fuck. | ||
| I've seen some videos of them spar. | ||
| It is goddamn ridiculous. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I bet. | |
| It's a war. | ||
| It's just war. | ||
| Chaos. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, punching and stuff. | |
| Beating each other shitless. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Well, they have the same style. | |
| The same style and both guys are going 100%. | ||
| I mean, they're fucking going to war. | ||
| And I wonder about that, man. | ||
| Obviously, you can't fuck with the results. | ||
| Kane is the best heavyweight next to Fedor ever, right? | ||
| I mean, there's Fedor in him and that's it. | ||
| Easily. | ||
| And I would love to see the two of them together. | ||
| Who knows what the fuck would have happened. | ||
| Who knows, if you watched the two Junior Dos Santos fights since the first fight, you wouldn't think that Junior could knock him out, but Junior knocked him out. | ||
| Anything can happen. | ||
| Fedor was a risk-taking motherfucker. | ||
| You know, Fedor, he would get wild on your ass. | ||
| Fucking bricks on the end of his arms. | ||
| Bricks. | ||
| Through those casting punches. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, he was never scared. | |
| Never scared. | ||
|
unidentified
|
The way he waded in, never scared. | |
| So that guy could... | ||
| I mean, he literally could have beaten anybody when he was at his best. | ||
| But you look at Kane's injuries, it's kind of like... | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, he keeps beating the shit out of his body, man. | ||
| There you go. | ||
| It's from training. | ||
| They're going 100%. | ||
| They're going 100%, man. | ||
| I've turned my sparring down in my career now that I'm 30 now, and I'm old, but I've just been fucking injured a lot. | ||
| Well, there's a lot of people that think that the sparring is one of the unnecessary aspects of strength and conditioning that people overdo. | ||
| Because you're beating each other up so much, and there's so much trauma that you reach a point of diminishing returns. | ||
| Like, yeah, are you tough? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Can you mentally deal with it because you're dealing with it on a regular basis? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| But... | ||
| Could you be 2% better if you didn't do that? | ||
| Could you be 3%, maybe 5%? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't think you can take it completely out, but you can't take it completely out. | |
| Nope. | ||
| No way. | ||
| No chance. | ||
| You can do, like, Manny Pacquiao spars only the last four weeks of camp. | ||
| Really, we only spar the last six weeks of camp. | ||
| I do an eight-week camp. | ||
| We only spar the last six weeks of camp. | ||
| And how many times a week do you spar? | ||
| Once. | ||
| Once a week. | ||
| That's smart. | ||
| That once a week, we're bringing some hellraisers, man. | ||
| It's some monsters. | ||
| As long as you're simulating scenarios, using techniques that are going to come up in a fight, and drilling them over again. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Drilling. | |
| There you go. | ||
| You know, Eddie always talks about this. | ||
| About how if you just fucking... | ||
| Everybody loves to roll. | ||
| But if you just drilled more, it would make you so much more successful at your rolls. | ||
| And it's really essentially the same way with any martial art. | ||
| I mean, with kickboxing, if you just beat the shit out of each other all the time, yeah, I guess you're probably going to get better because you're putting a lot of attention to it. | ||
| But if you work out with a really good, like, Rob Kamen-type coach or Dwayne Ludwig-type coach who takes you through very specific drills, once you're actually sparring and you land that left of the body, it's like your right leg is coming around whether you think about it or not. | ||
| It's just that. | ||
| It's just a part of your body's memory. | ||
| And I think that we still don't know what the right way to do this shit. | ||
| You guys are, you two guys are like experimental projects. | ||
| Ten years from for real, right? | ||
| You guys are the new breed of MMA fighters. | ||
| We're like the monkeys they launched in space. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| The cauliflower. | ||
| That's what we are. | ||
| You're an ape. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Me and me both. | |
| When I'm a gorilla, you're like one of those little spider monkeys. | ||
| Jacking off and shitting on everything. | ||
| Cutie as fuck, though. | ||
| Shaw, be like one of those fucking killer chimpanzees they found in the Congo. | ||
|
unidentified
|
The hairless one? | |
| Six foot tall. | ||
| The old dick. | ||
| Do you know about those? | ||
| Do we see the same one? | ||
| Do you know about those? | ||
| No. | ||
| They have these, over the last, since the 90s, they found these chimps in the Congo that they've always talked about. | ||
| They had a photo of one that was shot in the early 1900s. | ||
| They call him the Bondo ape. | ||
| It's an enormous chimpanzee, a completely different genus. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Is that the one that stands up? | |
| They stand up and they have a crest on their skull just like a gorilla does. | ||
| But they're chimps and they sleep on the ground. | ||
| They don't give a fuck. | ||
| The locals call them lion killers. | ||
| They have a video of one apparently eating a leopard. | ||
| They have two different types of chimp. | ||
| They call them tree beaters and lion killers. | ||
| And these are the lion killers. | ||
| And they're giant. | ||
| Six foot tall, 350 pound chimps. | ||
| And they sleep on the ground like this Wapping their dick while they pass out and everything just fucking steers clear these crazy fucks Thank I think of a champ how strong a chimp is and they're like 150 pounds. | ||
| This is double the size six feet tall super smart They have pictures of them all over the internet like walking I haven't heard of them. | ||
| Like, walking like a person. | ||
| There's Carl Armand. | ||
| He's a Swiss wildlife photographer. | ||
| And he found photos of them and spent years looking for them. | ||
| But apparently, it's an incredibly remote part of the Congo that's super difficult to get to. | ||
| But just now, these people that are fucking risking their lives in this crazy, shitty part of the world are going over there. | ||
| These monkeys are aggressive? | ||
| Oh, of course they are! | ||
| One of them, there's a fucking great story about these scientists that went down there, and one of them made a fucking bluff charge at them, and they didn't move. | ||
| You can't move. | ||
| You're dead anyway. | ||
| So you've got to stay on your ground, because if you do back up, they're for sure going to fuck you up. | ||
| And they rip your nuts off first. | ||
| Oh yeah. | ||
| They know that, right? | ||
| Everyone knows that, right? | ||
| They go, genitals, face. | ||
| They know what works. | ||
| They know what you like. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Early UFC rules. | |
| They're smart as shit. | ||
| They're like halfway between a person and an animal. | ||
| That's insane. | ||
|
unidentified
|
But way fucking strong. | |
| Why aren't they ripping balls off? | ||
| If you had a monkey that was 150 pounds and he wanted to fuck you up, you'd be in a giant problem. | ||
| He would probably kill you. | ||
| Most likely they would rip you apart. | ||
| Imagine something twice that big. | ||
| Twice that big and super aggressive, and the locals call them lion killers. | ||
| And we just barely know about these things. | ||
| They have DNA from them, they have some photographs and some videos, but they barely know these fucking things exist. | ||
| It's in a very difficult spot to get to. | ||
| I want one as a pet. | ||
| You might end up as the pet is the fucking problem. | ||
| Imagine just being a pet or a best friend. | ||
| - That's one animal I got. | ||
| - Or a training partner. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Training partner. | |
| Imagine armbarning that monster. | ||
| - Well, imagine the armbarning you. | ||
| - Imagine if you start flying in Bondo apes to train with. | ||
| Next podcast, who you train with, Bondo apes? | ||
| - Dude, I'll fly here. | ||
| - They gotta take babies and then train 'em and bring 'em up. | ||
| They can't take 'em. | ||
| If they're already adults, forget it. | ||
| - Hannibal Lecter masks on their face so they don't get crazy in the middle of training. | ||
| - Just a guillard. | ||
| - Most of the time, he doesn't bite. | ||
| - The wheel kicks would be insane. | ||
| - But when he bites, he doesn't bite. | ||
| - It would be a hammer fist and a wheel kick They would just go boom. | ||
| Can you imagine if you taught a chimp how to do a guillotine? | ||
| What that would feel like? | ||
| Pop your head off. | ||
| Especially with the big giant ones. | ||
| Darren Elkins won a decision. | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
| That's tough to do. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| We were barely paying attention though, let's be honest. | ||
| No, we're talking about... | ||
| We're talking about monkeys. | ||
| Yeah, we're talking about monkeys biting dicks off, son. | ||
| I'm still thinking about you trying to fuck everyone. | ||
| You trying to fuck that bond away, but who's going to get who? | ||
| Rafael Dos Anjos. | ||
| Who is he fighting? | ||
| He's fighting someone good. | ||
| Oh, that's right. | ||
| Nate Diaz is coming back. | ||
| Nate Diaz is coming back. | ||
| He's fighting Dos Anjos. | ||
| Dos Anjos is a monster. | ||
| Yeah, he's tough as shit, dude. | ||
| I can't believe he knocked out Henderson. | ||
| And he beat Cowboy. | ||
| Yeah, he beat Cowboy. | ||
| Think about it, man. | ||
| He's a beast. | ||
| He beat a couple guys. | ||
| He's beat quite a few really good guys. | ||
| But knocking out Benson is fucking huge, man. | ||
| Fabio Maldonado. | ||
| Maldonado is always fun to watch. | ||
| He's the human zombie. | ||
| Piss before I see this. | ||
| This is pay-per-view. | ||
| The old body shot. | ||
| Maldonado. | ||
| Maldonado, don't play. | ||
| He's got really good left hook, man. | ||
| Look how smooth his boxing is. | ||
| He's a perfect example of the exact opposite of a guy like Bagutinov. | ||
| He's a big guy. | ||
| I mean, he's fighting, you know, 205. But yet, he's like super light and relaxed with his punches. | ||
| He made a big mistake, fucking Stipe, though. | ||
| Did he have a choice? | ||
| He asked for the fight. | ||
| No, I'm saying he asked for the fight. | ||
| Yeah, that's that animal. | ||
| Look at that picture up there. | ||
| That's the Bondo ape. | ||
| That was one that they shot in the early 1900s. | ||
| See if you can get a better picture of that, because they show its whole body. | ||
| But look at the other one, Jamie. | ||
| There's one that they shot at an airport recently, these two guys, and they're standing in front of it, so you get a perspective shot at how big this fucking thing is. | ||
|
unidentified
|
In that picture you were talking about at the airport? | |
| No, well, that's a different one. | ||
| That's one that they caught in a camera trap. | ||
| But this picture of one that they shot, it's actually dead. | ||
| And these dudes are standing with this thing. | ||
| And you look at it and you go, what is that? | ||
| Probably because they could. | ||
| I mean, they live in the Congo. | ||
| They eat chimps there. | ||
| They eat whatever kind of meat they can get. | ||
| Oh, bro, I saw your Real Sports. | ||
| No, that's another image of one, too. | ||
| Yeah, the Real Sports. | ||
| No, just look up Bondo Ape. | ||
| And if that doesn't work, look up B-I-L-I Ape. | ||
| Look at Bondo Ape, Shob Training Partner, UFC 181. There's an image search. | ||
| I got it. | ||
| You got it? | ||
| There's a dead one. | ||
| There it is. | ||
| Look at the size of that fucking thing. | ||
| Look at the size of that fucking thing. | ||
| Back up so you can see it's balls. | ||
| Back up a little. | ||
| Look at that sack. | ||
| Look at that sack and cock. | ||
| How'd they kill it? | ||
| Just shot it in the head or something? | ||
| Yeah, they didn't kill it with a fucking wiffle ball bat, I'll tell you that. | ||
| You better shoot that thing. | ||
| Look at those fucking muscles on that goddamn thing. | ||
| It's a gorilla! | ||
| He's smiling, too. | ||
| Gorillas are... | ||
| Are they bigger? | ||
| Gorillas are bigger. | ||
| But that's like gorilla size. | ||
| For a chimp, that is fucking enormous. | ||
| That's like a really big man. | ||
| Got a set of tits on him. | ||
| Look at his arms, dude. | ||
| Those are like your legs. | ||
| Where's his dick? | ||
| You can't miss it, my man. | ||
| What do you mean? | ||
| Look at that fucking package. | ||
| Lee's ball sack. | ||
| It's just all... | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's all in your face. | |
| Is that the thing? | ||
| Is it leaning to the left? | ||
| Yeah, the thing that's leaning on his leg. | ||
| It's leaning to the left. | ||
| That fucking picture freaks me out, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Is that the thing? | |
| Yeah, that's his to the left. | ||
| Or is that just the stomach crease? | ||
| That's his cack. | ||
| That's his cack right there. | ||
| That's his big old dick. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I don't think that's his cack. | ||
| Well, they don't have big dicks like people do, bro. | ||
| They're big balls, right? | ||
| They're big balls. | ||
| This is actually a scientific fact. | ||
| The ball size is directly proportionate to the amount of promiscuous females in the region. | ||
| And that includes human beings. | ||
| In villages where human women are more slutty, the human men grow bigger balls. | ||
| That's huge. | ||
| Orange County! | ||
| Newport Beach! | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's in the air! | |
| Exactly. | ||
| Why do you think I import my girlfriend? | ||
| I was like, you know what? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Good move. | |
| Go out of state. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Go out of state for a gal with some morals. | |
| Small town girl. | ||
| In the mountains. | ||
| Too many people in Orange County. | ||
| They have to fuck. | ||
| There's too much traffic. | ||
| They just do it. | ||
| It's just fuck. | ||
| Can't wait for my boyfriend to get here. | ||
| Come on over here. | ||
| He's stuck in traffic for the next two hours. | ||
| So, Fabio Maldonado versus Hans Stringer. | ||
| Anybody know anything about Stringer? | ||
| Stringer? | ||
| 1-0 in the UFC. Is it Stringer? | ||
| He's about to get punched the fuck up. | ||
| From the Netherlands? | ||
| It's going to be a stand-up war for sure. | ||
| He has a victory over... | ||
| Francimar Barroso in one of the fight nights. | ||
| Third round decision. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Hmm. | |
| Maldonado's a fucking badass. | ||
| Oh, he's a beast, dude. | ||
| His boxing's really slick. | ||
| Remember when he clipped Glover? | ||
| Glover's lighting him up, dude. | ||
| Lighting him up. | ||
| And then, dink! | ||
| He catches him with a left hook and has Glover doing the chicken dance. | ||
| But he's just so tough, man. | ||
| So tough. | ||
| This is a guy you don't want to have a conversation with when he's 70. I agree 100. He's almost too tough. | ||
| You know those guys are too tough where they take that punishment? | ||
| You're like, please stop this. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| When he's 70 and he's drunk and you and him are sitting there and he puts his hand on your knee to tell you a story and does that clamp. | ||
| You know that clamp that dudes do when they tell you a story? | ||
| The clamp on your knee when they start talking. | ||
| Bro, fuck! | ||
| I told him. | ||
| I told him. | ||
| I'm not going down. | ||
| I'm not going down. | ||
| Tells the same story six times in a row. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Are there any UFC legends that have severe slurred speech? | |
| No comment. | ||
| No comment. | ||
| Or it could be like that old dude that beat the fuck out of that young boxer with the long hair. | ||
| Do you see that shit? | ||
|
unidentified
|
That old dude's like, he was throwing heat! | |
| You never see that video? | ||
| Oh my god, I don't see the video. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| That dude was like 60. Yeah. | ||
| 60 with an old man back. | ||
| He had an old man back. | ||
| Like a shrimp. | ||
| Like a big ass shrimp. | ||
| But then he started wading in with his hands up and I was like, oh fuck, this guy's screwed. | ||
| You know when I knew he was screwed? | ||
| Yeah, when he slipped the jab. | ||
| He slipped the jab like a goddamn world champion. | ||
| No fucks given about the jab. | ||
| Just, uh, boom. | ||
| There's that level of boxing you get to where your eyes are open as the punch hits you. | ||
| You ever seen those pictures of old school Roberto Duran? | ||
| There's a photo of him. | ||
| As the punch is hitting him, his eye is wide open and he's throwing a counter shot. | ||
| As the punch is hitting him, he's turning his head and landing. | ||
| When you hit that level, you're so relaxed. | ||
| And that old man was used to getting punched. | ||
| That wasn't a new experience. | ||
| That kid wanted out. | ||
| Fuck yeah, he did. | ||
| He didn't have to want out. | ||
| He was going out. | ||
| Man, bad boy's been around for fucking ever, and it hasn't seemed like they've really blown up. | ||
| You know why? | ||
| Because so many dudes tattooed it on their body, they go, look, we've got to keep going. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Are they making any money? | |
| Jeremy Horn has a bad boy tattoo on his body. | ||
| Yeah, they've been around for sure. | ||
| I haven't done one of those yet. | ||
| You know what, dude? | ||
| If you think about it, that really is the coolest thing for... | ||
| I'm a bad boy. | ||
| Everybody wants to be a bad boy. | ||
| Girls like bad boys. | ||
|
unidentified
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But when did it come to jiu-jitsu or like a Brazilian thing? | |
| Because I remember in like 88, I remember I had like a pair of shorts and a shirt. | ||
| It was Rude Boy. | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No, no, no. | |
| I remember the logo. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And it had a guy with a spiky Johnny Bravo haircut with a spiky... | |
| It's probably... | ||
|
unidentified
|
No, I'm talking about... | |
| That was Rude Boys. | ||
| No, no, Rude Boys. | ||
| No, that was Bad Boy. | ||
| That was Bad Boy. | ||
| Back in the 80s. | ||
| No, I remember. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Those eyeballs. | |
| Do you remember Rude Boy, though? | ||
| Yeah, I remember Rude Boy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Do you remember? | |
| I don't know. | ||
| That was first. | ||
| I was born in the 80s, so... | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't know. | |
| You guys are all fucking old. | ||
| Damn, you were born in the 80s. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fuck. | |
| I was getting pussy when you were coming out of pussy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes. | |
| Hollow. | ||
| I can be your father. | ||
| Mom? | ||
| I could be your father, dude. | ||
| If I fucked up in high school, I'm 84. I was getting pussy in 84. In 84, it was when I was just starting to get pussy. | ||
| So I could have fucked up and shot one into my girlfriend. | ||
| Jesus, Louisa, speaking about shooting one. | ||
| It's so good for you, Brazil. | ||
| Powerful genetics. | ||
| Here we go. | ||
| Stand-up war. | ||
| If anybody's listening to this and they think I don't like Brazil and that's why I'm not there, it couldn't be more further from the truth. | ||
| I love Brazil. | ||
| That escalated quickly to the ground. | ||
| Yeah, right away. | ||
| I love going to Rio. | ||
| I didn't have the time this week and I had family obligations. | ||
| I just couldn't make it. | ||
| I had to stay in town. | ||
| Damn kids. | ||
| Well, it's that. | ||
| There's things I can't talk about, but a lot of stuff going on. | ||
| Speaking of... | ||
| Speaking of badass old dudes, was that judo video real? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes it was. | |
| Where that guy was floating around? | ||
| That one blew my fucking mind too. | ||
| Have you seen that video I tweeted? | ||
| Blew my fucking mind. | ||
| Jamie, pull that shit up. | ||
| That old dude video of the old dude doing judo. | ||
| These guys are trying to toss him and he's moving like water. | ||
| Just flowing around them and he's like in his 60s. | ||
| Another old dude in his 60s. | ||
| When you know you're almost dead, you give zero fucks. | ||
| You're not protecting your ACLs. | ||
| You're just out there letting it hang. | ||
| You know? | ||
| I got a fucking rotator cuff injury. | ||
|
unidentified
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I'm just going to let this dude take me down and work off my back four times in a row. | |
| It's amazing. | ||
| It's amazing. | ||
| The guy's technique is just stellar. | ||
| It's also, there's a potential of watching that video that they're his students, and sometimes when you roll with your students, you know, the students almost have like a give up thing. | ||
| A guy comes out with a keto or the death touch, and they have those guys who are just like flipping. | ||
| This is different though. | ||
| I want to talk to those dudes. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What are they about? | |
| They're all crazy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| They're all brainwashed. | ||
| They're totally brainwashed. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| How about your boy Hunt getting the title shot? | ||
| Fuck yeah. | ||
| Is that wild? | ||
| Do you think those guys, do they make an agreement, like, fucking go with it? | ||
| Do they talk about it? | ||
| Or is it, like, unsaid? | ||
| I think it's unspoken. | ||
| Whatever you say, Master. | ||
| I think it's like a cult thing, you know what I'm saying? | ||
| Drink this Kool-Aid. | ||
| so they don't really say it's unspoken you think so? | ||
|
unidentified
|
we got a quarter of my head there was a lot of money on the line there was a lot of money on the line we're cool right? | |
| we're cool right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't even think you have to do that, man. | |
| I don't even think you have to do that. | ||
| It's an important fucking seminar and there's a show in. | ||
| They're in, man. | ||
| Dude, I think they're all in. | ||
| You would only have the guys that would do it, but you know. | ||
| If you don't let me Hadouken you, you can go back to the fucking gym. | ||
| Hadouken? | ||
| You called up the assholes who were going to fall down. | ||
| Hadouken you. | ||
| I would never be able to pull that word off. | ||
| I don't even know it. | ||
| But I knew what you meant. | ||
| Right when you said it, I'd go, I've seen that online. | ||
| Street Fighter, son, right? | ||
| Yeah, Street Fighter. | ||
| I never really played that game. | ||
| I know. | ||
| I mean, I did a few times, but not enough to call Hadouken. | ||
| Damn, Fabio Maldonado is getting tagged with that elbow on the top. | ||
| Big old Dutchman. | ||
| Brazil is not happy to see Fabio Maldonado. | ||
| Big Brown, when you get in a half-car position in this spot here, do you ground and pound, or do you try to pass? | ||
| I look for submission from half guard. | ||
| Most guys like to ground and pound here, especially wrestlers. | ||
| Because you can really control a guy out of half guard. | ||
| Especially in MMA. You can bore someone to death. | ||
|
unidentified
|
True. | |
| I agree. | ||
| You can bore someone to death. | ||
| I like to give him this underhook. | ||
| I give him the underhook. | ||
| Like I did with Mitreone. | ||
| I give him the underhook and I look for my darts. | ||
| I look for their neck while they come up. | ||
| You don't want him out? | ||
| No. | ||
| His darts is nasty. | ||
| Especially at heavyweight. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, look at this. | |
| Baldonado with a fucking big rush. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| Nice with the hooks, man. | ||
| Nice with the hooks. | ||
| Oh, beautiful job. | ||
| Beautiful job. | ||
| Good control. | ||
| So if someone mounted you, you would let them mount you? | ||
| Yeah, I don't care. | ||
| I think mounts overrated MMA. | ||
| Oh, so if someone mounted you, you'd be fine? | ||
| 100%. | ||
| My daycare was Shane Carlin. | ||
| Would you try to regain half guard? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Why? | ||
| Or create a scramble. | ||
| No, but why would you try to regain half guard? | ||
| Because I can get up easier. | ||
| But if you were in half guard... | ||
| Maldonado with a deep half! | ||
| You would stay in half guard. | ||
| Stringer stays on top. | ||
| You wouldn't mount. | ||
| No, I wouldn't mount. | ||
| What I would do is I'd create a scramble. | ||
| I'd give them the underhook to create a scramble to get their neck or an arm. | ||
| You hear what I'm saying? | ||
| I see what you're saying. | ||
| If you don't want to mount because it's worse than being in someone's half guard, then if you were being mounted, why would you put them in half guard? | ||
| You should just leave them... | ||
| I think it depends on the style. | ||
| It depends who you're fighting, too. | ||
| If you're fighting for doom, you don't let that motherfucker mount you. | ||
| I don't think you let anybody fucking mount you, ever. | ||
| I think when you're in the mount, naturally, as a fighter, you want to recover half guard at least. | ||
| It depends who you're fighting. | ||
| I give guys mount to create scrambles. | ||
| How crazy is that? | ||
| How good is your mount? | ||
| Pretty good. | ||
| I've been doing jiu-jitsu for a while. | ||
| Right, so if you were mounted on a purple belt, you'd be pretty happy with it, right? | ||
| If you were mounted on a guy who just maybe was a notch below you, you would take that and you would stay there if it was an MMA fight, right? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| So the difference between that and a guy who's really good is that your mount is not good enough? | ||
| Or is it that you don't like the position? | ||
| No, I think in MMA because when they're striking the show, because you're grapevine, right, and you flatten the guy out, you're not going to get heavy strikes in. | ||
| Right. | ||
| So you're kind of just sitting there. | ||
| Or if you're a Verdum guy, you're looking for a submission, correct? | ||
| Do you ever cross your feet underneath like a guard from the top, like a mounted guard? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes. | |
| That's nasty. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's nasty. | |
| If you're a Verdum guy, you'd go for a submission. | ||
| What's a Verdum guy? | ||
| Let's listen to Ian, because Ian just said he mounts everybody. | ||
| What's your philosophy on it? | ||
| I'm just better at punching and passing than everybody else in my division, so it's easy for me to mount. | ||
| Pass, mount, you try and recover. | ||
| Try to mount again. | ||
| Try to mount again. | ||
| Why are you trying to get to the mount? | ||
| It's a dominant position and I can punch you from there and I can get you to... | ||
| The person gets tired. | ||
| They start to panic and they start to squirm. | ||
| I take their back. | ||
| I do whatever. | ||
| But I can kind of float above somebody, knee in the belly, punch, elbow. | ||
| To get that guy to work so much when you can float over him and hit him with knees to the body or whatever it is. | ||
| You're hitting the guy. | ||
| But you can't do that from half guard? | ||
| You can. | ||
| You're saying you create scrambles out of them. | ||
| You go knee on belly, you let them turn, go and whack them out. | ||
| I'll do like the, you know, the, the, the cross my feet. | ||
| If I can lock them down, I'll lock them down and then just punch them, elbow them and look for a submission. | ||
| But I don't mind that people are, if they're starting to scramble like that and I'm on top of them, it's such a dominant position. | ||
| I can just, I just hold people down. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| I'm saying when you lace your feet like that, you're not finishing a guy with strikes. | ||
| You mean when you butterfly or when you grapevine? | ||
| Yeah, when you grapevine. | ||
| You're not finishing a guy with strikes. | ||
| And if a guy's a high-level grappler from mountain, he's going to get out. | ||
| But dude, there's some guys, when you grapevine them, there's dudes that have a crazy hyper-extension in their back. | ||
| I've seen guys who flatten guys out with grapevine. | ||
| Flatten them out for sure. | ||
| I don't see a lot. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You gotta have games when there's no great fun. | |
| You gotta be able to sit up. | ||
| You gotta have a calculated game going on. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| Like, what are you doing when there's not punches? | ||
| Big Brown, why are you not training with Eddie Bravo? | ||
| You need to get your fucking ass over to 10th Planet and get a couple lessons in. | ||
| We've talked about this before. | ||
| Son, don't talk about it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Be about it. | |
| He lives in Venice, man. | ||
| He can't make it today. | ||
| That's incredible. | ||
| It's like a 10-minute drive. | ||
| I drive to Orange County. | ||
| Dude, it's a 10-minute drive. | ||
| He can't be expected. | ||
| What's in Orange County? | ||
| Wrestling. | ||
| Rain Training Center. | ||
| Oh, you got a rain? | ||
|
unidentified
|
And me, motherfucker! | |
| Even though that was the first time we met. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You know what? | |
| We've never met before, but we still hang out all the time. | ||
| There's a lot of 10th Planet Jiu-Jitsu down there. | ||
| Tony Ferguson trains down. | ||
| We know I train with Henry and Heron, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Everyone knows this? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I got a question about cups. | ||
| If I'm going to do it, I'm going to do it with you. | ||
| I got a question. | ||
| I'm thinking... | ||
| I don't want to go down Orange County. | ||
| Listen, what you're saying, everything you're saying about the Verdum guy is correct. | ||
| But everyone should strive to be the Verdum guy. | ||
| Do you understand what I'm saying? | ||
| I'm striving to be the Verdum guy. | ||
| I'm with you. | ||
| Jiu-Jitsu is my passion. | ||
| I'm with you. | ||
|
unidentified
|
But when I get out on Travis Brown, he's not a Brendan Schaub on the ground. | |
| You want to be able to do that to everybody. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| Like whoever, Brazilian, whatever. | ||
| I agree 100%. | ||
| I don't give a shit if they're Brazilian. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You know what? | |
| If I'm going against a high-level Brazilian and I can get the mount, I'm going to get the goddamn mount and go, holy shit, I'm dominating this fucking dude. | ||
| I'm with you. | ||
| I'm with you, Eddie. | ||
| If it's there, but I'm never going to stay in half guard if I can get the mount. | ||
| I want to get to the mount because you're in some deep shit in the mount. | ||
| There's a lot of games going on. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm with you, brother, but what happens if they're in deep shit in half guard? | |
| Well, you're just nasty on a half guard. | ||
| Yeah, but overall in MMA, if you look at all the fights, not that many fights. | ||
| You put all the time a fight is in half guard, top half in MMA, most of the time nothing's happening. | ||
| It's just a bunch of boring shit. | ||
| That's true, but in that respect, in that same argument, most of the time when you're in guard, it's bullshit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Exactly. | |
| But your guard's nasty. | ||
| I agree. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I agree with you. | |
| His half guard, his fucking top game from half guard is very good. | ||
| He's very good at beating guys. | ||
| He's very good at beating guys. | ||
| That's a beautiful thing. | ||
| Half guard, darts, half guard, Japanese necktie, half guard, guillotine, fuck yeah. | ||
| Half guard, spin to that knee bar. | ||
| Hell yeah. | ||
| Hell yeah. | ||
| But also... | ||
| All sorts of games from side control. | ||
| There's a whole system. | ||
| And then a whole system from the mouth. | ||
| And then back and forth. | ||
| And then the back is a whole other book. | ||
| The fight's taking a place right in front of Dana, and he's not watching. | ||
| He's watching the monitor. | ||
| It's a weird thing, man. | ||
| He's watching the monitor. | ||
| How dare you, Eddie Bravo? | ||
| But it's a weird thing you do sometimes. | ||
| The fight is on in front of you, but you're watching a monitor. | ||
|
unidentified
|
The fight's on in front of us in three screens, and we're talking about bookers in Argentina. | |
| But we're still watching it. | ||
| Still watching it. | ||
| Still awesome. | ||
| Any chance given to punch people, Maldonado just fucking excels. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
But Brandon, I understand what you're saying. | |
| Smooth technique, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Looks like he's got a little extra sting in those punches. | |
| And so why take the risk and move and miss? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Especially at heavyweight. | |
| Guys are so explosive. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| They're so explosive at heavyweight. | ||
| I would say they're less explosive at heavyweight. | ||
| Ooh, I disagree, Eddie. | ||
| I think the explosive guys are guys like him. | ||
| Ooh, I completely disagree. | ||
| Who are just like, really? | ||
| No. | ||
| Because guys his size, how many are playing football? | ||
| I'll do a solid zero. | ||
| Peewee football? | ||
| He was like the star of Peewee football. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm sure. | |
| He still plays Peewee football. | ||
| Destroying guys. | ||
| Destroying it. | ||
| Just fucking all-world Peewee football. | ||
| I'm short, too. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm little. | |
| I'm little. | ||
| I'm with you. | ||
| I feel like running the shop when I'm with you. | ||
| Back to the Mount talk. | ||
| I got a question about cups, man. | ||
| Eddie, they outlawed those Thai steel cups in a lot of grappling competitions, right? | ||
| - Yeah, 'cause you can fuck a dude up with a cup. - Right, so why can't you do the same thing in MMA? | ||
| In MMA, like when, you know, I remember one time What the hell happened here? | ||
| Maldonado got on top. | ||
| Hold on, pause that. | ||
| I was wearing him out. | ||
| What the fuck? | ||
| Maldonado's giving some beatings. | ||
| Look at his shoot and pull. | ||
| He's about to finish him from half guard, son. | ||
| Look how calm he is. | ||
| Nice. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Maldonado. | |
| He's about to finish him from half guard. | ||
| Right there, you gotta shoot. | ||
| You gotta shoot the perfect double under. | ||
| Pull him on top of you. | ||
| And then when they come back with that wizard, you come up with him right to top. | ||
| He's not looking to do that, son. | ||
| He doesn't have that skill set. | ||
| Maldonado's looking to just fucking fire up some punches. | ||
| That dude looks like Anderson. | ||
| That is Anderson. | ||
| It's Anderson up there with him. | ||
| Anderson's in his corner. | ||
| Come on. | ||
| Come on, son. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Dude. | |
| I don't know, but you know, you could learn something watching him punch. | ||
| Like, everything was very precise and at like 70% power. | ||
| And Anderson can do whatever the fuck he wants. | ||
| He can do whatever he wants. | ||
| He's in Rio. | ||
| They can suck each other's dicks right now. | ||
| The whole crowd will go, voop, Mario A's! | ||
| But like you were saying, his striking from any position is so fucking pinpoint, it looks like it hurts. | ||
| He had extra snap on it, like the timing was right. | ||
| I think it's the man boobs. | ||
| He's just smooth. | ||
| So here's the question. | ||
| If you could fuck a guy up with a Thai steel cup in a grappling competition, it's an extra lever. | ||
| Like if you catch a guy on a knee bar or anything. | ||
| It's like two inches of metal. | ||
| It's metal. | ||
| And it hurts. | ||
| I was rolling with Amir Renovardi. | ||
| He's the only guy I've ever rolled with that rolls with a Thai cup on it. | ||
| He would mount you and stick that fucking Thai cup right in your solar plexus and grapevine you. | ||
| It was... | ||
| Death! | ||
| It's terrible! | ||
| I never thought about it. | ||
| I've always worn one. | ||
| Yeah, but that's what I'm thinking. | ||
| You're gonna kick me in the nuts, you're gonna fucking kick steel. | ||
| But, Mike, have you ever fucked with those, my question was, have you ever fucked with those, like, diamond cups? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| What do you think about it? | ||
| What's better, diamond or, like, a steel cup? | ||
| I wore it once, and I liked it. | ||
| I just, I think it broke, and I never wore another one. | ||
| Which model was it? | ||
| How long ago was it? | ||
| A while ago. | ||
| They're better at it now. | ||
| They've done a bunch of changes to them. | ||
| They're pretty dope. | ||
| They were awesome, but I actually put a steel cup inside of mine. | ||
| Ooh, that's very smart. | ||
| Because I like the way it's set up, but I don't trust plastic. | ||
| Right, right, right. | ||
| It kicks in plastic and you go, wow, it's shaped. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And steel is a little bit different. | ||
| And especially, they'll say, oh, look, there's a video of someone kicking you. | ||
| Okay, well, let Melvin Manhoof kick you in the nuts. | ||
| Let's let someone who knows how to kick, because I'm watching this kick and I'm like, I'm not that impressed. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Fuck, let me kick you. | ||
| If you want to prove something, let me kick you. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| I'm only 125 pounds. | ||
| Yeah, there's a lot of people that say like, hey man, I eat leg kicks or I eat kicks. | ||
| You'll eat some kicks. | ||
| Some kicks you can eat. | ||
| Pedro Izzo. | ||
| Yeah, exactly. | ||
| That's the perfect guy to bring up. | ||
| My coach I'm working with, he was Pedro Izzo's striking coach. | ||
| He said he couldn't hold mitts for him. | ||
| Couldn't hold pads for him. | ||
| He said you'd have to put him on a bag. | ||
| I've seen him kick a bag at Beverly Hills Jiu-Jitsu. | ||
| He would just fold those motherfuckers. | ||
| Dude, him, Peter Ayurts, at Marco's studio on Aliso, just... | ||
| Says the guy who folds fucking bags. | ||
|
unidentified
|
This is true. | |
| Yeah, I could do that shit too. | ||
| That's why I'm telling you. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What a hypocrite. | |
| It's shit not normal. | ||
| There's certain dudes that just have a weird power. | ||
| Flexibility? | ||
| No. | ||
| In your hips? | ||
| It's a little bit of that. | ||
| Your hips are super flexible. | ||
| It's bone size too, dude. | ||
| It's a weird... | ||
| It's shape. | ||
| And that's one of the main problems that I have with transgender fighters that fight over in women's MMA. Oh. | ||
| I should say only if they don't let them know. | ||
| Like, that was the issue that I had with Final Fox. | ||
| She didn't divulge because she didn't think she had to because it was a medical issue. | ||
| If you know that a chick used to be a dude but is now a chick and you fight her, it's on board. | ||
| I think it should be legal to ride bulls. | ||
| I think it should be legal to jump BMX. She should be able to do whatever the fuck you want to do. | ||
| I think a 135-pound chick should be able to fight a 135-pound dude. | ||
| I think if Ronda Rousey and Brian Carraway talked enough shit and they decided to go at it, I don't have any problem with that. | ||
| If they both agree to it... | ||
| I'll go up and wait and fight Ronda, but... | ||
| There's the size of the body. | ||
| It's the shape of the body that's different. | ||
| It's not just the density of the bone, because black women have the same density of bone as white men. | ||
| It's very similar. | ||
| Almost the same. | ||
| Very similar. | ||
| But, you know, obviously, pro athletes and guys who strength train are going to have more density in their bones than the average person that they're measuring. | ||
| It's a significant difference. | ||
| But the big difference is the mechanical advantage of the male frame. | ||
| You don't find a female with super wide shoulders, narrow waist, and the same size hips and the same shape hips as a man. | ||
| And when you have that kind of body, you can just generate more force. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Trouble. | |
| I can look at a dude and tell you whether or not he could be like a man-hoof. | ||
| There's some dudes that just have that stupid fucking power, and you could look at him and go, well, he might. | ||
| He might not. | ||
| He might be like a Bobby Lashley. | ||
| He looks like a fucking brick shithouse, but he's not like a Shane Carwin. | ||
|
unidentified
|
True. | |
| But a Shane Carwin's a Shane Carwin. | ||
| Shane Carwin had that stupid fucking power that you can't teach. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Of course he did. | |
| What if he became a transvestite and wanted Jesus Christ! | ||
| Could you imagine Jen Carlin out of his ass? | ||
|
unidentified
|
With a wig? | |
| With a wig on? | ||
| Just clipping bitches! | ||
| It became legal! | ||
| As soon as he started using three, four fights in a row in regular MMA, like, dude, I'm going to lose weight and fucking chop my balls off. | ||
| Can you imagine him collar-tie a chick? | ||
| All he would have to do is collar-tie a chick and punch her in the back of the ear, and it's over. | ||
| His hands are not going to shrink. | ||
| And if they do shrink, what are they going to shrink? | ||
|
unidentified
|
A little? | |
| Within ten years, All the champions in women's MMA will be former dudes. | ||
|
unidentified
|
All of them. | |
| That's so true. | ||
| This is a stoner question. | ||
| What do you think aliens eat strictly GMOs or are they vegan? | ||
| Good question. | ||
| What would you think? | ||
| They come down and we find out aliens are real. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They came down. | |
| They're flying through space. | ||
| Would they laugh at vegans? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Do they have planets that are designated for organic farming? | |
| Do they have planets? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Do you think they bring farms in their ships? | |
| They're eating air, dude. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They just absorb energy. | |
| You know what I mean? | ||
| What would they say was wrong with the vegan thing? | ||
| They go, listen, this is the truth. | ||
| As long as you're getting all the vitamins and minerals and essential fatty acids and amino acids in a pill form, whatever you eat, your body's going to adjust. | ||
| These bodies, we can digest anything. | ||
| It's all about the vitamins, minerals, amino acids, and essential fatty acids. | ||
| That's it. | ||
| You're discounting the possibility that they might not even be biological. | ||
| We're getting so close to coming up with artificial skin. | ||
| They're talking about artificial intelligence, the ability to download someone's consciousness. | ||
| Who knows when? | ||
| I mean, a hundred years from now, a thousand years from now, whatever the fuck it is. | ||
| But downloading your mind into some sort of a computer. | ||
| You're looking at these aliens, we're assuming they're biological. | ||
| But they can easily transcend biology. | ||
| If you talk about people that lived a million years ago, like was Australopithecus, right? | ||
| The oldest version of human. | ||
| If you took one of them and showed them an iPhone, they wouldn't know what the fuck to do with it. | ||
| It would basically be as ridiculous... | ||
| A comparison, the way they live, to an alien being some sort of a biological creation or an artificial creation. | ||
| If they come up with fake cells, and then they come up with fake body parts, and eventually maybe won't enact the same biological processes as a brain or as a human body. | ||
| But it might be something that replicates it in a way where it could be just as conscious and just as productive. | ||
|
unidentified
|
So the consciousness would have to be something that could be downloaded, in a sense. | |
| Or replicated. | ||
| Yeah, replicated. | ||
| So once you figure that out, you'd make fucking copies of yourself. | ||
| You'd make at least 20 copies, mail them to all your fucking relatives. | ||
| How about this? | ||
| Look at the aliens. | ||
| They all look the same. | ||
| Because what if you lose the hard drive? | ||
| What if the files get corrupted? | ||
| Then that's how you die. | ||
| That's how you kill someone. | ||
| No one's ever seen aliens with balls. | ||
| To kill someone, you gotta get their fucking master file. | ||
| Well, the thing about the alien. | ||
| That's how you kill them. | ||
| When everybody's version of the alien is essentially the same. | ||
| It's always a big gray thing with black eyes. | ||
| Like, what if they just all agree? | ||
| Like, look, let's just all look ugly. | ||
| No one's allowed to be hot. | ||
| We don't have dicks anymore, so who gives a shit? | ||
|
unidentified
|
And then when you adjust the horn, you won't even want pussy. | |
| You're like, I don't want pussy. | ||
| You're like, you don't even want it. | ||
| Do you want it? | ||
| Because after a while, people hold on to it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You can hold on to the hunger if you want it, but then you hold on to it. | |
| Hey, this is a real fight that we should probably solve. | ||
| This is a real fight. | ||
| It's not happening yet, so we can still touch shit. | ||
| Yeah, Phil Davis is fighting glory. | ||
| Slowly, you end up learning that you want to shut that hormone off. | ||
| If you don't, that's the thing that kills everybody. | ||
| That's the downfall to everybody. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'll take this life. | |
| I'll take this life with the food and the fucking steaks. | ||
|
unidentified
|
But you know what? | |
| You can turn it on. | ||
| You can turn it on every now and then. | ||
| Every now and then you can go in there, turn on the sex drive. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Boom! | |
| And they're like, damn, I want something. | ||
| Boom! | ||
|
unidentified
|
And then you can turn it off. | |
| You turn it off and you're good. | ||
| If they can figure out a way to transcend sex, I mean, we say if they don't have sex, fuck them, but what if they come up with some shit that's way better than sex? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Transcend sex and a loud spaceship that sounds like a fucking muscle car. | |
| Just think about what Fabio Maldonado's doing tonight. | ||
| There's no way you want to transcend that. | ||
| That's going to be beautiful. | ||
| What he's doing, he's going to do a hundred times and keep forgetting he did it. | ||
| Did I do that? | ||
| Yeah, I did that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
The over-under on sexual partners for Fabio Maldonado's night is infinity. | |
| It's infinity. | ||
| I'm not going to name names, but very famous. | ||
| I know a famous Brazilian is very famous. | ||
| I'm not going to name any names, but they're crazy buck wild. | ||
| They'll just disappear. | ||
| They'll be with you in an airport. | ||
| They'll meet a chick at an airport and just get another flight, take off with this chick, and be gone for a week. | ||
| This guy is super hardcore. | ||
| Also, you've got to think, MMA fighters, for the most part, you guys could testify to that. | ||
| Very impulsive. | ||
| Wild fucking people. | ||
| I mean, they're not entering into the cage because the fucking accounting gig didn't work out. | ||
| I get time off, I get tattoos, I do weird shit, I buy cars and shit. | ||
| I do weird stuff, man. | ||
| You need a muscle car, Big Brown. | ||
| You have an American muscle car. | ||
| We drive Priuses. | ||
| Bro, you have a Porsche in a BMW. What are you talking about? | ||
| I'm getting an American muscle car, son. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I've been thinking a lot lately. | ||
| I'm thinking I'm missing that in my life. | ||
| Get a Cobra. | ||
| I used to have a Shelby. | ||
| Shelby GT500. Get a fucking real Cobra. | ||
| I'm just trying to figure out if I should get a new one or an old one. | ||
| Will real dolls or fuck robots ever get so good? | ||
| Better than hookers. | ||
| Then it's actually pimp to have one and not have chicks? | ||
| Never. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You know what I mean? | |
| Never. | ||
| It's going to be so good, it's not going to be... | ||
|
unidentified
|
You know what it's going to be? | |
| This is what it'll be. | ||
| You go over to a dude's house, and his girlfriend is in lingerie, and she's cleaning up. | ||
| And you go, is that she real? | ||
| That's what's going to happen. | ||
|
unidentified
|
When it gets that good! | |
| When it gets that good! | ||
| Tell you outside. | ||
|
unidentified
|
She doesn't know she's not real. | |
| Dude, if it costs two million dollars, you get the ultimate one where you can't tell it's not human. | ||
| I've got to write that down. | ||
| Have you ever seen Stepford Wives? | ||
| Nicole Kidman? | ||
| The robot wives? | ||
| They clean and do everything they want them to do? | ||
| Look it up. | ||
| Look it up. | ||
| Read a book. | ||
| It's going to get there. | ||
| What's going to happen? | ||
| I don't think so, man. | ||
| Why do you watch those fucking women's shows? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I love it. | |
| Oh, I watch all that bullshit, my man. | ||
| What about the Oculus Rift? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, yeah. | |
| That, like, 3D simulation thing? | ||
| Don't you think that could, like, eventually change the porn industry? | ||
| It already is. | ||
| They're already starting to do them. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Are they? | |
| They're doing first-person porns with those things on. | ||
| It's supposed to be insane. | ||
|
unidentified
|
God. | |
| Wait, what? | ||
| Are they ready? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, they're starting to do it. | ||
| Watch it after the show. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Eddie's like, I'm in. | |
| What is this happening? | ||
| I just want it for research purposes. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| For knowledge. | ||
| Eddie, you could do jiu-jitsu with that. | ||
| You could put on an Oculus Rift suit and go through positions. | ||
| You could go through positions. | ||
|
unidentified
|
She looks like this for jiu-jitsu. | |
| Why does the doll have huge titties? | ||
| Well, I'm teaching girls jiu-jitsu. | ||
| I gotta do this with a girl. | ||
| And the only way the cameras pick it up is everyone's naked. | ||
| Cameras get confused by clothes. | ||
| And this is a triangle series. | ||
| The lighting has to be good for... | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| We're working on the north-south position right now. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Big fight, son. | |
| I'm like in a green suit with all these electro balls and shit. | ||
| I'm just like... | ||
| I'm like... | ||
|
unidentified
|
There's no one there. | |
| Do you see anybody there? | ||
| There's nobody there. | ||
| Look! | ||
| There's nobody there. | ||
| I look. | ||
| I'm taking pictures. | ||
| There's nobody there. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I hopped on Duncan Trussell's Oculus Rift. | |
| What? | ||
| There's nobody there! | ||
| Have you been on that, Joe? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You played the Alien game on that thing? | ||
| I haven't been to the new one. | ||
| Holy shit, that was terrifying. | ||
| I heard the Alien game is so scary that people are thinking it should be illegal. | ||
| It's terrifying. | ||
| Come on, do it. | ||
| It's virtual reality, and you're in the world, and apparently the worried, legit concern, people are going to have heart attacks. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| Like, if you're an old man, okay, if you're in your fuckin' 70s... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Playing video games? | |
| You deserve to die. | ||
| Big Brown again! | ||
| Big Brown again. | ||
| But they're fun, man. | ||
| If your fuckin' wife, you know, doesn't want to have sex anymore... | ||
| If I'm 70, eating a bag of Cheetos, playing video games, put me down. | ||
| Just shoot me, man. | ||
| What's wrong with me as a fucking retired? | ||
| I get video games now. | ||
| It's weird, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I get it. | |
| You ain't can't leave. | ||
| You gotta go over to Duncan Trussell's house, Big Brown. | ||
| Check that shit out. | ||
| If you don't, if you don't budge, I'll give you $500. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Is that scary? | |
| If the alien comes at you and you just fucking, just mean mug it, I'll fucking give you $500. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I guarantee you. | |
| Where do you do this at? | ||
| I want to do it. | ||
| At Duncan Trussell's house. | ||
| He's got like this kid, this alien game. | ||
| And when the alien, when your gun fucking jams like mine did and the alien comes and eats your fucking throat, like your body just reacts. | ||
| It's like, ah! | ||
| You move back. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's crazy. | |
| No, you're full in, full on virtual reality. | ||
| Does the whole system come with the game? | ||
| How does it work? | ||
| Yeah, but you get nauseous as fuck because there's some kind of delay, so you get bad motion sickness so you can't play long. | ||
| But that shit's scary. | ||
| Too intense for me, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's serious. | |
| Too much. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Come on. | |
| 500 bucks. | ||
| It's too much. | ||
| Oh, damn. | ||
| He teased it. | ||
| He teased it. | ||
| I'll take the challenge. | ||
| He did the X now. | ||
| No more heart. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No more heart. | |
| He used to do the heart. | ||
| He gave him the X now. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Shit. | |
| Here we go. | ||
| First round. | ||
| Whoever makes this... | ||
| Yeah, those are dope, right? | ||
| Pro bars. | ||
| I found out about those a couple weeks ago. | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| They're awesome. | ||
| You should try the... | ||
| There's a superfood one with, like, greens and shit. | ||
| Grover can wrestle them. | ||
| Yeah, he can, dude. | ||
| It's a rough matchup for Phil. | ||
| Phil's my boy, too. | ||
| And Grover has some really good fucking hands, man. | ||
| Really good hands. | ||
| Fuck yeah. | ||
| Wow, Glover looks good, man. | ||
| He competed in Abu Dhabi. | ||
| Glover looks good. | ||
| Scary guy. | ||
| Phil had a real problem with Rumble, man. | ||
| Rumble Johnson matches up poorly with a lot of people. | ||
| I agree, but it's going to be the worst matchup for Phil. | ||
| Yeah, tough to take down and fucking throws bombs. | ||
| Eventually, Phil Davis will have sick striking. | ||
| It's getting there. | ||
| He's just gotta keep going. | ||
| Eventually he's gonna figure it all out. | ||
| It just takes years. | ||
| And he's got someone who's fucking scary in front of him, so he's hesitating a bit. | ||
| It's a tough matchup for Phil, man. | ||
| Trains with Gustafson, though. | ||
| Well, you know, that whole camp, man. | ||
| Alliance is a great fucking camp. | ||
| There's so much talent down there. | ||
| Great coaches, too. | ||
| Fuck yeah, dude. | ||
| And good dudes, too. | ||
| A lot of good dudes down there. | ||
| Yeah, I need to go down there more. | ||
| They're like friends of mine, so I need to go hang out. | ||
| Train. | ||
| Keep moving, Phil. | ||
| Dude, Glover looks really good. | ||
| Glover's one of the guys that just keeps coming forward, man. | ||
| He'll eat two of yours, just land one of his. | ||
| It's weird. | ||
| He looks really good, too. | ||
| The way he's seeing everything, just sliding right out of it. | ||
| It's like Phil's throwing these shots and he's getting just offline. | ||
| Just offline. | ||
| But looking for his openings. | ||
| Super patient, right? | ||
| Just trying to get him against the cage. | ||
| Keep moving, Phil. | ||
| God, he's going to be tough to take down, man. | ||
| Look at this, man. | ||
| Phil Davis might have to pull guard. | ||
| It's crazy to see these super high-level wrestlers like Phil Davis. | ||
| You're working on your overall MMA game. | ||
| You're not doing as much wrestling. | ||
| And it's not just a wrestling match. | ||
| Once you start throwing in punches and stuff, there's some guys you just have a really hard time taking down. | ||
| The distance is different. | ||
| Even if you're as good at wrestling as Davis is. | ||
| He's so fucking good. | ||
| The distance is different. | ||
| Is that what the big thing is? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Yeah, son! | ||
| Damn, front kick and a punch behind it. | ||
| See, slowly he's going to be an amazing striker. | ||
| Nice fucking sprawl. | ||
| He has a really good guillotine, man. | ||
| That's not his hurt shoulder either. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| Phil might have it. | ||
| Ooh, defense. | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
| Glover's got some dope defense. | ||
| Look at that! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, shit. | |
| You know he walks around at 240. That Chuck used to bring into the camp. | ||
| I mean, Chuck used to bring in so many fucking badass dudes, so Glover got so good. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, he was the guy, like, for six years. | ||
| Everybody wanted to get in the UFC. Put his visa problems. | ||
| Well, my rounds when I was getting ready for Mitrione were Lyoto Machida and Glover Teixeira. | ||
| Glover would come in and he was 240 pounds. | ||
| I was like, what are we doing? | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
| For sure. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| He's dropping out. | ||
| He let it go. | ||
| He let it go on the way down. | ||
| But look at this. | ||
| I think it slipped. | ||
| This is how Phil's going to win. | ||
| He's going to wear him out and win by decision. | ||
| Do you think so? | ||
| Yep. | ||
| Well, you know... | ||
| I know, though. | ||
| I've just been fighting you. | ||
| It's also... | ||
| A lot of people were wondering who Glover was training with. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, he's getting hit hard right there. | |
| Oh, good hard shots by Davis. | ||
| Hard shots. | ||
| Oh, he's eating these trying to get up. | ||
| He could be over right here. | ||
| Dude, he's getting tagged. | ||
| He's hurt, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He's hurt. | |
| Dude, Phil Davis threw some bombs right there. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He's a badass. | |
| And he's not afraid to put the hooks in and go for a choke. | ||
| Yeah, it seems like he likes his position to strike from. | ||
| You can't eat those shots, man. | ||
| Yeah, he's going to get... | ||
| Oh, that uppercut. | ||
| Into the arm uppercut. | ||
| Get the fuck up. | ||
| He's getting wobbly. | ||
| Look, I know who Ian McCall is rooting for. | ||
| That's my friend. | ||
| I like Phil, too. | ||
| I'm just better friends with Glover. | ||
| Whatever, bro. | ||
| I called you out. | ||
| Yeah, you did. | ||
| Get up, bro! | ||
| Yeah, for sure, going for Glover. | ||
| How many times have you heard about someone that you thought was your friend and they were rooting against you because... | ||
| Oh, it hurts my feelings. | ||
| Because one of their buddies is fighting you. | ||
| I take it personal, man. | ||
| Super personal. | ||
| Has it happened a few times? | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Because it happens. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's business, right? | |
| I'll find out certain media guys who you think are your friends, and then for a reason after the fight, they're like, yeah, watch him call it, picked Mitrione to win or Travis Brown to win. | ||
| I'm like, cool, I won't do interviews with him anyway. | ||
| Have either one of you guys trained with Eric Del Fiero? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| What do you think about him? | ||
| I've fought for Total Combat. | ||
| He's a great coach, huh? | ||
| Great coach, smart. | ||
| The whole group is a group of really smart guys. | ||
| He's a good dude, too. | ||
| Dude, Phil is tagging him. | ||
| He keeps tagging him. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, shit. | |
| Phil's got his back. | ||
| Dude, Phil is fucking him up. | ||
| This is how you win, Phil. | ||
| You wear him out, son. | ||
| Dude, his head is getting rocked back on these shots. | ||
| These are serious shots. | ||
| Yeah, Phil's hitting him hard. | ||
| He's going for it. | ||
| Even if Glover gets through this round, he's taking a lot of punishment, man. | ||
| Some really hard shots to the head. | ||
| Wearing him out. | ||
| I mean, he's blocking these. | ||
| Oh shit. | ||
| Big round for Phil Davis. | ||
| Huge round. | ||
| Oh shit. | ||
| How's Phil's gas tank? | ||
| Pretty fucking good, man. | ||
| Well, he's totally exhausted right there. | ||
| If he comes out strong, then, you know, he's done his cardio, right? | ||
| Because he looks totally exhausted. | ||
| Even if he is in phenomenal shape, you're going to be tired that first round. | ||
| Yeah, you're supposed to be tired. | ||
| He's trying to fuck him up. | ||
| He's supposed to be tired. | ||
| It's all about recovering at this point. | ||
| This would be a big victory for Davis, man. | ||
| Dude, if he beat Leona Machina in Brazil, let's say he wins this fight, Glover takes care in Brazil? | ||
|
unidentified
|
What the hell? | |
| He also beat Fabio in Brazil. | ||
| I think we were at that fight for the Stefan Bonner. | ||
| Oh, front kick up the face. | ||
| Ooh, the right hand behind it. | ||
| That was clean, man. | ||
| These are bad, though. | ||
| Those are heavy. | ||
| There was a few of them that really snapped his head back. | ||
| That one? | ||
| One of them where he really got wobbled in the second exchange. | ||
| Look at the powerful Vitor Belfort. | ||
| I'm not mad at his wife. | ||
| Never have been. | ||
| Never have been. | ||
| You don't think he's gonna get the strap? | ||
| She's like the Brazilian Pam Anderson or something? | ||
| Something along those lines. | ||
| Pam Anderson did a fuckload of squats on a staircase. | ||
| Just a blowout ass. | ||
| Off the charts bootie. | ||
| Those chicks have big asses down there and they're getting fake asses. | ||
| It looks just not necessary. | ||
| Fake asses will never be... | ||
| Eventually they will be... | ||
| I don't like them. | ||
| Eventually they will be, but right now, no guy is accepting fake asses. | ||
| No. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Hell no. | |
| In 10 years we will accept it, but not right now. | ||
| It's too early. | ||
| I would rather have a flat, no-ass-having little... | ||
| No crossover conversations, folks. | ||
| Big fucking fight going on here. | ||
| We're talking about asses, sorry. | ||
| Fake asses. | ||
| He comes up that front kick to the face. | ||
| Good. | ||
| Keep moving, Phil. | ||
| You gotta keep moving, man. | ||
| I don't think women are aware of that. | ||
| That we will not accept that. | ||
| You better hide that shit. | ||
| You can't tell nobody. | ||
| It ain't like titties. | ||
| You can tell your whole family about your titties. | ||
| Your dad will help you with the down payment and all that shit. | ||
| Ooh, good shot. | ||
| It's a great shot. | ||
| You better keep that a secret. | ||
| Wait a minute. | ||
| Whose dad's going to help their chick with a down payment? | ||
| What are you talking about? | ||
|
unidentified
|
You not been to Texas, though? | |
| You not been to Texas? | ||
| No, I don't really. | ||
| Is that super common? | ||
|
unidentified
|
That happens a lot, dude. | |
| I don't know how many times I've heard that at the strip club. | ||
| At the strip club? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| Dude, a lot of... | ||
| I'm from Orange County. | ||
| It's everywhere. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's Newport Beach. | |
| I hear it all the time. | ||
| But graduation just now. | ||
| Uh-uh, not right now. | ||
| Oh, look at this. | ||
| Big switch. | ||
| Glover's on top. | ||
| There we go. | ||
| You gotta respect that game. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Damn. | |
| I know, it doesn't look like he has it. | ||
| No, it's not. | ||
| It's gotta adjust his grip, right? | ||
| What kind of grip does he have here? | ||
| Nothing. | ||
| Kung Fu grip. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh! | |
| Nice. | ||
| It didn't look like he totally had it gripped up, right? | ||
| How many more guillotines do you think we'd get in the UFC if we had no gloves? | ||
| How many more submissions? | ||
| A lot more. | ||
| A lot more submissions, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| I've brought this up before. | ||
| Do you think that it would actually be better if you fought with no gloves? | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| You think about what you can do with your elbow... | ||
| They should fight with those rubber gloves that the doctors wear? | ||
| Why have anything? | ||
|
unidentified
|
If you think... | |
| How about dish gloves? | ||
| Dishwashing gloves. | ||
| I really think you should have no ankle support, no wrist support, no gloves, no nothing. | ||
| I think if you fought with no gloves, we would realistically know what punches do in a fight. | ||
| Right now we don't. | ||
| Because right now we have padded up gloves of hands that are wrapped up together. | ||
| They don't do much. | ||
| They do enough that it changes. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Not much though. | |
| It's enough that most people would wear them if they had the option. | ||
| It helped out brains. | ||
| You break your hands. | ||
| You break your hands way easier without gloves. | ||
| Oh, way easier. | ||
| I think it makes a big difference, too, in what's effective striking because your knuckles, like, they don't dig it as much. | ||
| Your wrists buckle a little bit on shots. | ||
| Whereas if you're wrapping your wrists up and taping it down, you're making it, like, artificially stiff. | ||
| Oh, man. | ||
| And that allows you to punch harder. | ||
| Yeah, it allows you to punch harder. | ||
| I think we get an unrealistic sense of the value of punches because of that. | ||
| I see what you're saying, but I don't think people are watching it for that. | ||
| But I'm not talking about people watching it. | ||
| I'm talking about for the purity of the sport. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| You're talking about the spirit of martial arts. | ||
| To make grappling better. | ||
| Like Angerstone and hyperanalyzing everything. | ||
| I always do that. | ||
| But I mean, getting rear naked chokes, man. | ||
| Getting rear naked chokes is a big difference between gloves on and all. | ||
| There's a lot of stuff that's in MMA that's ridiculous. | ||
| It's just retarded. | ||
| If you touch the ground, you can't knee to the face. | ||
| That kind of stuff. | ||
| There's so many laws that just won't... | ||
| They never change them. | ||
| And just like you can't wear tights. | ||
| The law is you can't have your calf covered because... | ||
| It's dangerous. | ||
| Yes, it's so dangerous. | ||
| It's crazy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's illegal. | |
| Dude, Phil is tired, man. | ||
| You have to have the cab explode. | ||
| Poke to the eye. | ||
| Damn. | ||
| I was just about to say that Phil, he blew out so much energy in that first round. | ||
| He's beating the brakes off him. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, he did a lot of fucking damage. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Of course he did. | |
| Look at that. | ||
| That's Enrique Iglesias right there. | ||
| No, that's Enrique's brother. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Vicente Fernandez when he was 26. Conor McGregor's got a pink shirt and tie. | |
| Yeah, of course he does. | ||
| Dapper. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I love him. | |
| He's my new favorite fighter. | ||
| She likes cockiness. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| Powerful, Aubrey. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Good choice. | |
| Oh, God, right in the eye with that thumb. | ||
| God, I hate that shit. | ||
| I'm just going to be rooting against him. | ||
| I hope he can get the basket. | ||
| Here's another thing, man. | ||
| Right? | ||
| I hate the sound going on. | ||
| Here's another thing. | ||
| If we're going to have gloves, if we're going to have gloves, why the fuck don't they cover the tips of the fingers? | ||
| Why don't they figure out a way to do that? | ||
| I don't think it's going to help the fingers, man. | ||
| It's not that much of a problem. | ||
| It's a big problem, man. | ||
| I think it's a huge... | ||
| How many Jon Jones fights have there been eye pokes? | ||
| Fuck everyone. | ||
|
unidentified
|
But even if the fingers were covered, can't you still poke someone's eye? | |
| Yeah, but the nail's not there. | ||
| I think if the fingers are covered, you're not going to be able to dig in with one finger. | ||
| That's not good enough. | ||
| They'll still fuck you up. | ||
| Let me poke you in the eye with a finger condom on. | ||
| Open up. | ||
| Boink, you'd be like, damn, ow! | ||
| I know you've got finger columns around her somewhere. | ||
| Dude, my daughter accidentally poked me in the eye the other day, and I saw sparks. | ||
|
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|
When you go to a restaurant, they have the gloves on. | |
| Like, what's the fucking difference if they grab their balls, if they grab their ass with the gloves on? | ||
| They wouldn't do that. | ||
| They have respect. | ||
| Whoa, Phil Davis is a big takedown. | ||
| Take your gloves off. | ||
| Oh, the rear naked! | ||
| Rear naked! | ||
| Every order, new gloves. | ||
| Look at this! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Nope. | |
| Too high. | ||
| Got too high. | ||
| He's got to drop his hips down, but he doesn't want to lose the position. | ||
| He doesn't want to get bucked up. | ||
| It's crazy that he's standing. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, end of the round, too, there. | ||
| It was a short time. | ||
| I thought he was going to do it. | ||
| It's 2-0 for Phil. | ||
| Fuck yeah. | ||
| MMA takes off the gloves. | ||
| Football takes off the pads and helmets. | ||
| Oh, that's a good idea. | ||
| It's called rugby. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's a terrible XFL. Did you guys see that? | |
| Did you guys see that rugby thing where the dude KO'd the dude on the field? | ||
| He ground and pounded him? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fuck. | |
| Dude, he hit him with the right hand, dropped him, and then fucking pounded him out. | ||
| How about that video of that ref at a karate tournament who takes out both competitors? | ||
| He's the ref, and he's trying to separate them. | ||
| Was that Russia or something? | ||
| Like a Russian ref, dude. | ||
| He made karate look beautiful. | ||
| It was a real fight. | ||
| He was trying to separate them, and then he just went... | ||
| And then he kicked the guy in the face. | ||
| Do you know the name of the video? | ||
| I've never seen that. | ||
| Maybe if you YouTube search Karate Ref Fight. | ||
| Ref Fight. | ||
| Karate Ref Fight. | ||
| It's like a three second video. | ||
| It's amazing. | ||
| Okay, and watch this real quick. | ||
| This is about a three second. | ||
| Who's working the fucking truck? | ||
| Bruce Connell! | ||
| Who's working the fucking truck? | ||
| Dana's going fucking nuts! | ||
| Where was Jenny's ass? | ||
| They were fucking screaming in their headphones right now. | ||
| Why didn't you show Jenny's ass? | ||
| You showed her face. | ||
| You showed her walk down. | ||
| She's very beautiful. | ||
| You had an opportunity to show her ass. | ||
| We need that for America. | ||
| America needs that. | ||
| Phil Davis, two rounds in. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh! | |
| He got clipped right there. | ||
| Oh, damn. | ||
| Glover knows. | ||
| Glover's on fire right now. | ||
| Well, he knows it's do or die, man. | ||
| These two rounds in the hole. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Damn. | |
| Big push. | ||
| Big push here. | ||
| Ray Lewis and shit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Damn. | |
| Well, he's built like a goddamn superhero. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Phil Davis is a ridiculous body. | |
| It's crazy. | ||
| It is. | ||
| His back's insane. | ||
| His legs are retarded. | ||
| They're just so goddamn big. | ||
| It sounds so good. | ||
| Eddie, is that it? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Is that the video? | |
| Yes, this is it. | ||
| Go full screen on that shit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Check this out. | |
| We're going to watch a fight. | ||
| Hold up. | ||
| Pause it. | ||
| Pause it. | ||
| We'll watch that shit after this fight's over. | ||
| The fight only has four minutes to go. | ||
| Something's about to happen in this. | ||
| We'll need some downtime while there's a... | ||
| What gluttons we are, almost watching a fight during a fight. | ||
| I want to fucking kill an animal, too. | ||
| Someone take their clothes off. | ||
| Ooh, good takedown. | ||
| Oh, big takedown for Phil. | ||
| Two of the best light heavyweights in the world. | ||
| Cue up that Russian beating the shit out of those two guys in the street. | ||
|
unidentified
|
From 1982. The karate guys. | |
| That's fine. | ||
| As long as he had those shiny pants on. | ||
| I used to love those kickboxing pants. | ||
| They're laced in the front like a sneaker. | ||
| Remember that shit? | ||
| Chuck Norris used to wear them. | ||
| I had those bitches. | ||
| I had those. | ||
| I love Chuck Norris so much, I wore those for my Taekwondo pants. | ||
| Oh, here's the mouth. | ||
| Oh, look at this. | ||
| Phil Davis. | ||
| Oh, look at that. | ||
| I like how he hooked the leg. | ||
| That was nice. | ||
| That was very nice. | ||
| Cradle, baby. | ||
| Phil Davis. | ||
| 10th grade wrestling. | ||
| Man, my big brother used to do that to me. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I hate it. | |
| Well, you remember how Boss Root used to tap guys with some fucking crazy cradle? | ||
| He would be in that Bosruten weird reverse press. | ||
| I still use that. | ||
| Yeah, it's dope. | ||
| He gets a headlock on one side, and he hooks your leg on the other side, and he fucking flexes and just separates your head from your body. | ||
| It's the Bosruten shark machine. | ||
| He's such an amazing person. | ||
| He's so goddamn strong. | ||
| Especially in his prime, Bosruten's so goddamn strong. | ||
| It's a legit technique. | ||
| Yeah, so make you shit yourself? | ||
| Can you make a shit yourself? | ||
| We almost saw it once in the UFC. I forget who was going for it. | ||
| But I almost forgot it existed. | ||
| And then Joe Silva actually reminded me. | ||
| That's that Boss Rootin thing. | ||
| I was like, that's right! | ||
| Damn, Phil Davis running it. | ||
| That's insane. | ||
| Running it, man. | ||
| Phil's an underdog. | ||
| This is a big fight. | ||
| Oh, big punches, man. | ||
| Phil Davis looking as good as ever against a fucking legit killer. | ||
| Yeah, best performance I've seen. | ||
| Well, you know what? | ||
| He came off that rumble fight. | ||
| He knew he had to take it to the next level. | ||
| You know what? | ||
| I'll be honest. | ||
| I would like to see him going for the finish. | ||
| He's trying, man. | ||
| No, I mean, I'm talking to Submito. | ||
| It's me talking to Submito. | ||
| Dude, he's still tagging him. | ||
| I mean, he's got two minutes to go, and he's beating the shit out of Glover. | ||
| Bad. | ||
| I mean, he's hit him with 30 or 40 unanswered shots. | ||
| I'd still rather see a submission. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Who was the one-handed, the one-armed Kimura? | |
| That was him. | ||
| The Wonder Bar? | ||
| That was badass. | ||
| Very high-level. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, that was bad. | |
| What he's doing to Glover, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I know he's making a look at ease, but this is crazy. | |
| No, this is insane. | ||
| Yeah, this is sick. | ||
| Dude, Glover's an animal. | ||
| Animal, straight beast. | ||
| You know, I wonder how much of an effect, if any, and I'm just throwing this out there because I have to. | ||
| Look at that, he's on top now. | ||
| His camp, doing his camp in Danbury, Connecticut had, as opposed to doing it like an American top team. | ||
| You know, like, what kind of sparring partners is he getting? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I mean, maybe he had a bunch of guys flying in to work with him. | ||
| I thought Davis is an awesome wrestler, though. | ||
| I would imagine. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| No, Phil is awesome. | ||
| Oh, there we go. | ||
| Look, it's still going on. | ||
| Glover can still catch him with 120 to go. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| That's why I wanted the finish right there. | ||
| Deep breaths here. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| Because of this. | ||
| Go on. | ||
| Get on with that. | ||
| Oh, dude. | ||
| Over the top of that right hand. | ||
| Oh, he heard him. | ||
| He heard him with that one, man. | ||
| That was clean on the jaw. | ||
| Whoa, if he comes back... | ||
| Phil's mouth open. | ||
| Sure move, Phil! | ||
| Oh, man. | ||
| Nice drop down on that single. | ||
| Oh, look at that. | ||
| He's chasing him. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Look at that. | |
| Phil knew he had to stay on that dude. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And if he drags him to the ground, the shit is all his. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Game over. | |
| It's big. | ||
| He recovered. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He recovered. | |
| Look at that. | ||
| He keeps going. | ||
| He's a wrestler. | ||
| He can do this all day. | ||
| Especially his grappling cardio is different than striking cardio because striking cardio is more labored. | ||
| So when you see him standing up and he's tired, he's still moving kind of labored. | ||
| But when you see him on the ground, he looks fucking sharp as shit even when he's tired. | ||
| He's gassing all over the place and recovering all over the place. | ||
| Gassing, recovering, gassing, recovering. | ||
| But his wrestling, he doesn't gas when he's grappling. | ||
| That's his base, right? | ||
| Any grappler can gasp. | ||
| He's breathing while he's doing it. | ||
| You can tell he's taking some big-ass deep breaths. | ||
| His mouth is open, but he's fucking dominating. | ||
| He can do this all night. | ||
| He could go five rounds of this. | ||
| He can do this all night. | ||
| He's got to burn hot. | ||
| You have to burn hot in order to wear a guy out. | ||
| He's got to wear himself out. | ||
| We're getting a view of his cardio. | ||
| Why is Glover putting his hand out? | ||
| That's called an ass-whooping, son. | ||
| He's getting the fuck beat out of it. | ||
| What happened? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Is that it? | |
| It was a San Diego ass-whooping in Brazil. | ||
| Yeah, that was pretty goddamn strong. | ||
| That was crazy, man. | ||
| That's three rounds. | ||
| That's three rounds. | ||
| He looked like that after the first round, remember? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's a big victory right there. | ||
| I'm just calling him a big victory. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Huge. | |
| Because if he loses this fight, I fucking quit! | ||
| Quit my MMA, bro. | ||
| I'm going straight to pro wrestling. | ||
| Damn, I said... | ||
| Powerbomb everyone. | ||
| Big fucking loss, man. | ||
| You know the mentality you need to get to that point? | ||
| Where Phil Davis is? | ||
|
unidentified
|
That kind of... | |
| Yeah. | ||
| Especially coming off... | ||
| Especially coming off that loss of Anthony Jones. | ||
| He's that front kick and that right hand right at it again. | ||
| Damn, that is a nice move. | ||
| That front kick right hand he does. | ||
| And he throws the right hand like a jab. | ||
| His right leg is forward when he throws it. | ||
| But he's got a lot of pop behind it. | ||
| It catches you like it. | ||
| It cracks you with it in the end. | ||
| Ian, you're gassing all over the place constantly and recovering constantly, right? | ||
| If you ain't gassing all over the place, you ain't pushing yourself hard enough, right? | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| That's how you break people. | ||
| That's what we just saw. | ||
| We just saw Phil break them. | ||
| Shit about cardio my whole life. | ||
| I always heard people talk about cardio. | ||
| Tito Ortiz would talk about cardio. | ||
| Randy Couture, they talk about cardio. | ||
| And I always thought cardio was how long can you go before you get really tired? | ||
| Like you're like huffing and puffing. | ||
| That's your cardio. | ||
| I got like eight minutes of cardio. | ||
| That's what I always thought it was. | ||
| No one really explained it to me at all. | ||
| I never trained like a professional athlete until Metamorris. | ||
| And once... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Phil Davis. | |
| Of course he won. | ||
| Of course he won. | ||
| So I just decided, man, what am I going to do for cardio? | ||
| I was lifting weights. | ||
| I was doing a lot of Jiu Jitsu. | ||
| I was training with Jean Jacques. | ||
| And I just decided, fuck, I'm going to do sprints. | ||
| And I'm going to go to the pool, the 24-hour fitness. | ||
| And I'm going to figure this out by myself. | ||
| I just drove to the fucking pool. | ||
| They had a big clock. | ||
| And I never do this. | ||
| I'm not a professional. | ||
| I go, I'm going to sprint 20 times across the pool. | ||
| I've done sprints before in the past. | ||
| 20 times. | ||
| And as soon as the clock, the big clock in the pool hits the 12, that's when I'll take off. | ||
| And then I might finish at 25 or 30, and I'll stay at the other side of the pool until it hits 12 again. | ||
| And it hits 12, I go, boom, sprint again. | ||
| I just made this up, and I did it 20 times. | ||
| The problem with doing cardio in the pool is that you don't get to read your heart rate. | ||
| Do they have like a cardio monitor that works in a pool? | ||
|
unidentified
|
This is what I did. | |
| This is what I did. | ||
| I kept it simple. | ||
| I just went as fast as I fucking can. | ||
| And I didn't need anybody coaching me because my law was I'm only going to rest until it hits 12 again. | ||
| So I better bust ass. | ||
| So I was racing across the pool so I can get that time to rest. | ||
| And what I learned about myself is holy shit. | ||
| Every time I spinnered across, I got really tired. | ||
| The first three were easy, but when I got to 10, to 12, my plan was, I just said 20, because metamorphosis is 20 minutes. | ||
| I go, I'm going to do 20. And do that at 10, 11, 12, I was dead. | ||
| Just out on the edge of the pool, barely. | ||
| I was dying. | ||
| There's all these old people at the pool and shit. | ||
| They're going, what the fuck is this guy doing? | ||
| I just made this shit up. | ||
| But what I learned, I learned it. | ||
| You could be... | ||
| Dead. | ||
| Tired. | ||
| And recover within 30 seconds. | ||
| That's what I was learning. | ||
| And I would be dead. | ||
| When I hit the 9, I'd be like... | ||
| When I hit the 10, I'd be like... | ||
| But by the time I hit the 11, I'd go... | ||
| Let's go again. | ||
| Another sprint. | ||
| Bam! | ||
| You get across. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Boom. | |
| I end up with 30 seconds of rest. | ||
| Same thing. | ||
| So you learn it. | ||
| Holy shit! | ||
| You can recover over and over. | ||
| If I didn't know this, when I'd get to that point in grappling, I would go, I'm done. | ||
| I would break. | ||
| I'd go, I'm done. | ||
| I have new more gas. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Whoa! | |
| Someone needs to talk to him. | ||
| That's how you know you're the champ. | ||
| It's like the Bieber effect. | ||
| When you put that shit on, everyone goes, nah, it looks great, man. | ||
| Let's show that karate video. | ||
| Let's show that karate video. | ||
| Calling out Anderson Silva. | ||
| Powerful. | ||
| Phil, did he call out Anderson Silva? | ||
| He called out Anderson Silva. | ||
| That's what he said? | ||
| He goes, I beat a lot of Brazilians, but there's only one I want to fight next. | ||
| That's Anderson Silva. | ||
| Anderson's fighting Nick Diaz. | ||
| Why is he saying that? | ||
| It's a real call out, right? | ||
| Man, he talks a lot. | ||
| He's got a triple knot in that tie. | ||
| I think it's fat. | ||
| He knows what he's doing. | ||
| He's backing it up, though. | ||
| Here's the video. | ||
| Let's watch this shit. | ||
| So the dudes are karate duking it out. | ||
| Watch the ref. | ||
| Watch the ref. | ||
| Wow, they are going off, man. | ||
| Damn, where is this taking place? | ||
| Check this out. | ||
| Where is this taking place? | ||
| It's a gymnasium for sure. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Damn! | |
| He just took out that guy, too. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He just fucking went like elephant on Rampage. | |
| No one's stopping him either, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's like those scenes at the circus where an animal just goes fucking crazy. | |
| So he tries to push them away. | ||
| They don't push away. | ||
| Boom! | ||
| He knocks that guy in the face. | ||
| And look at this guy. | ||
| Dang. | ||
| This guy gets tore up, too. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Boom! | |
| That guy gets tore up. | ||
| That's insane. | ||
| They have a camera crew there. | ||
| Well, they're filming today. | ||
| That's why we're watching it. | ||
| The competitors are like, what the fuck? | ||
| Maybe that was a movie. | ||
| Maybe that was a movie. | ||
| Maybe someone was filming the making of a movie. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| That looked like a real fight, man. | ||
| It was a movie. | ||
| That was a real fight. | ||
| Those guys were really hitting each other. | ||
| That was good technique, too. | ||
| Where'd that take place, Jamie? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm looking. | |
| It doesn't necessarily say. | ||
| I think it's Russia. | ||
| Yeah, that looks like something would happen in Russia. | ||
| Have you seen the amateur boxing fight? | ||
| That the guy, after the fight, takes his gloves off and goes over and beats the shit out of the ref. | ||
| No way. | ||
| It's bad. | ||
| I didn't watch that. | ||
| It's an old guy. | ||
| It's fucked up. | ||
| You see him chase the guy out and they gotta fucking help the old man up and he's falling over. | ||
| It's like, ooh, fuck, man. | ||
| It wasn't funny like that. | ||
| Look at the graphics on these games. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I know. | |
| That looks like a dude. | ||
| That looks like a real dude. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| By the way, it doesn't look like that when you play it. | ||
| It just doesn't. | ||
| It just doesn't. | ||
| I mean, it looks close. | ||
| But there's enough clipping and weirdness to it. | ||
| The frames per second that they can achieve in these previews, they can just make it look a lot sweeter. | ||
| We're a couple years from indistinguishable from reality, though, probably on those games. | ||
| Well, you're going to be able to have games where you use the Oculus Rift and you play out like a video. | ||
| You make a video of things that are actually happening. | ||
| And instead of a game engine, just have them do it like a hundred different fucking ways. | ||
| Where, you know, have them repeat the same scenarios over and over again from all these different angles. | ||
| So that no matter where you are, where you're moving, it feels like you're actually doing it. | ||
| You know, you can turn to your left and the fucking... | ||
| It's really just like as if you turn to your left. | ||
| They'll be able to program those in the same way they do it with stop motion animation where you have to do each individual frame. | ||
| They'll just have different possible scenarios that they have people actually act out to the point where they cover the whole room like a fan, like one of those folding fans. | ||
| Every ounce of the room gets covered with a possibility. | ||
| Too much. | ||
| And then you have this headset on and you're in this room and you can take these possibilities. | ||
| It's already been planned out as a video. | ||
| And then you watch it, you play it out, and you fucking shoot aliens, like in real time, and you fuck, and you get on spaceships. | ||
| Nerdy gets laid every day. | ||
| I'm not interested in that. | ||
| It's gonna happen, man. | ||
| You get a suit that has that electro-stem, you know how when you put electro-stem on it, like causes the muscle to collapse, you know? | ||
| So if you get hit somewhere, it'll just cramp up, you know, send it through a pulse. | ||
| No, they don't have it yet. | ||
| You digest the theory? | ||
| It's gonna happen, you know, so that'll like freeze you up, you know, on that one side and you have to like limp through. | ||
| They have those things already, those stim machines. | ||
| People use them already. | ||
| They're supposed to help recovery. | ||
| Yeah, the complex machine? | ||
| Yeah, have you added that shit to like a suit? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Something bites you. | ||
| You feel the teeth clamp in your body. | ||
| Give up some predictions here. | ||
| What do we think is going to happen here? | ||
| Mendes' decision. | ||
| Aldo, when you say Aldo, how quickly? | ||
| First round? | ||
| Second round? | ||
| Third round? | ||
| Third round? | ||
| Mendez decision says Brenna Schaub. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Mendez second round TKO. Second round TKO says Warrior Poet. | |
| He gives zero fucks. | ||
| He's making calls. | ||
| Eddie Bravo. | ||
| I'm going to say... | ||
|
unidentified
|
God damn it, I don't know. | |
| Damn it, I don't know. | ||
| I'm going with damn it, I don't know as well. | ||
| Kareem Abdul-Chukmal. | ||
| What do you think? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't know. | |
| I'm going with I don't know also, man. | ||
| This is a tough one. | ||
| It's a tough one. | ||
| Great picks, gentlemen. | ||
| It's really fun. | ||
| Yeah, this side of the table takes zero chance of pretending. | ||
| Here's my take on it. | ||
| Aldo is fucking incredibly difficult to take down. | ||
| Like one of the most difficult to take down until he gets tired. | ||
| The problem is, by the time you get him tired and you take him down, you are eating some of the fastest fucking leg kicks in the business. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I agree. | |
| And that combination, the duchy, the left hook to the body, and then the right leg kick, he throws that motherfucker as good as anybody that's ever walked the face of the planet. | ||
| Yeah, but Mendez is throwing that against pads every day. | ||
| That's part of playing things. | ||
| It is possible that Mendez can win this fight. | ||
| Don't get me wrong. | ||
| Mendez can knock out anyone on the fucking planet if he connects. | ||
| The way he knocked out Clay Guida, the way he knocked out Darren Elkins, if Mendes cracks you, he can fucking put it on you. | ||
| He's the hardest hitter in this division. | ||
| Unbelievable athlete, ridiculous freak athlete. | ||
| It's hard too. | ||
| It's a wild fight. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Would I say earlier that I have no idea? | ||
| I have no idea. | ||
| Mendes can win this fucking fight. | ||
| Don't get me wrong, no doubt about it. | ||
| And he can win by knockout. | ||
| I think he can do that to anybody. | ||
| The question is, if you watch their first fight... | ||
| And you watch their second fight, how much has he improved? | ||
| And that's the only thing we're going to find out tonight. | ||
| We're going to find out how much he's improved and whether or not Aldo is in any way regressed. | ||
| You know, whether or not his injuries, he's had a bunch of injuries, he's had like a nagging neck injury, he's had all sorts of different things that have... | ||
| You know, fucked with him. | ||
| He's had kidney stones that he's gotten that either are... | ||
| It's weird who you talk to. | ||
| It's either it's genetic or it's from weight cutting. | ||
| There's a lot of people that believe it's an either-or thing. | ||
| That it might be genetic and you get exacerbated by weight cutting. | ||
|
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|
And he's fucking huge. | |
| He's a big guy. | ||
| He's a big guy. | ||
| And he struggles to make that 145. And I think that's one of the reasons why he's been having a hard time in the later rounds. | ||
| But goddamn, to get through those fucking rounds, you gotta go through hell, son. | ||
| That beating he put on Uriah Faber's leg. | ||
| Holy shit, dude. | ||
| He's something. | ||
| He's something, man. | ||
| He's a lightning-fast, ridiculous striker who's also world-class at jiu-jitsu. | ||
| His jiu-jitsu game is fucking real good. | ||
| You just don't see it. | ||
| But occasionally you do see it. | ||
| Like in the Mike Brown fight, when he got Brown on his back and he sunk those hooks in. | ||
| That is a legit black belt back mount to smashing. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Were you at the Uriah fight with him? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I was out there. | ||
| It was fucking... | ||
| When Aldo came out to the I'm gonna run this town tonight, I was the only person in Sacramento going, Yeah! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fuck yeah, bro! | |
| Oh my god, like, what are you doing? | ||
| I'm like, he's going to fuck your boy up. | ||
| Just wait. | ||
| Ed Soares told me about that before. | ||
| He was so excited. | ||
|
unidentified
|
His manager was like, he's gonna come out to that Jay-Z song. | |
| Run this town tonight. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And we were like, oh, shit. | |
| He's going deep. | ||
| Uriah is the coolest person in Sacramento. | ||
| It used to be the scary combo. | ||
| The scary combo was the elite wrestler with Chuck Liddell striking. | ||
| That was a nightmare. | ||
| Like, what the fuck are you gonna do? | ||
| You might get shut off. | ||
| There's a good chance. | ||
| Tonight, you're gonna get shut off. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You know what I mean? | |
| But... | ||
| The combo of black belt and jujitsu and vicious striker, damn, that's a whole different dimension. | ||
| It is, because the ground game is a more dangerous ground game. | ||
| You're trying to get this guy to the ground, but he might choke you. | ||
| There's a very good chance that he's better than you on the ground, so what now? | ||
| What the fuck are you going to do now? | ||
| It opens up possibly. | ||
| I mean, wrestlers in this day and age are not really just wrestlers. | ||
| Pretty much everybody has some ground game knowledge. | ||
| But you'd be amazed at how many guys are fighting in the UFC that, you know, they really don't work on certain positions. | ||
| Like, they never work on being on their back. | ||
| Yeah, I've rolled with some people that are in UFC. I'm like, I'm fucking tiny, and I just balled you up. | ||
| Like, and it's, granted, I've been, everyone talks about my wrestling, but I'm not a world-class wrestler. | ||
| I'm just good at MMA wrestling. | ||
| I mean, I do beat up kids in college and stuff, but I never accomplish anything. | ||
| Yeah, he comes off this all the time. | ||
| It's all, it's a shit. | ||
| I've been doing jiu-jitsu for just as long. | ||
| I'm only a purple belt, but that's because my coach is my coach, and I don't wear a gi ever. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Yeah, well, that's probably... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, it's hard when you don't wear a gi. | |
| Jeeva's very, like, he's amazing. | ||
| You know jiu-jitsu, but you put on a gi. | ||
| That's how you get your belts. | ||
| Don't get a bravo start on the gi, please. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Why do you hate the gi so much? | |
| No, no, I don't hate the gi. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm holding on to my rash card for safety. | |
| You gotta remember where you came from. | ||
| I know. | ||
| I just love the fact you're wearing a fucking Hoist Gracie t-shirt after all the shit you guys have been talking about. | ||
| You haven't talked any shit. | ||
| I haven't talked any shit. | ||
| I put up some memes. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No, I'll put some memes. | |
| Some memes up. | ||
| I'm like, I talk shit in a funny way. | ||
| He talks shit in an angry way. | ||
| Yeah, he's really mad at you. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He hates me. | |
| He has anger. | ||
| He shouldn't be mad at you, man. | ||
| I talk shit in a funny way. | ||
| You've been nothing but fucking praising of him from the jump, man. | ||
| I mean, we've both said that if it wasn't for voice, we would have never been in jiu-jitsu in the first place. | ||
| He just needs to sit. | ||
| He's also a proud guy. | ||
| He needs to sit down and realize with Eddie and just get the two of them together. | ||
| If they spoke for more than half an hour, Hoyce would realize. | ||
| Eddie is never disrespectful. | ||
| No, he would never realize that. | ||
| He just beat your brother, that's all. | ||
| He would never realize that. | ||
| No way. | ||
| He needs an ayahuasca trip more than anybody. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Well, it's unfortunate because a lot of people are upset at him for this whole thing. | ||
| I mean, I've read a lot of forum threads about people with, like, legit arguments like that guy used to be a hero to them. | ||
| And then you hear him saying shit like this. | ||
| It's like, this is just not what my hero would say. | ||
| Like, why are you saying that? | ||
| Even the MMA websites were talking about the things he was saying about pot. | ||
| I, in a crazy way, I know this is going to sound insane, but... | ||
| I appreciate it. | ||
| He's thinking about me. | ||
| That's fucking nuts. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's Horace Gracie. | |
| Horace Gracie saying my name? | ||
| That's crazy. | ||
| That's the ultimate UFC legend. | ||
| I think it's pretty cool. | ||
| That's flattering, I think. | ||
| When he starts talking more shit, I like it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm like, oh, what did he say? | |
| I'm like, cool. | ||
| I thought he sounded with Bellator. | ||
| He said he would punch my nose if I had a gentleman rubber guard. | ||
| He would punch you in the nose. | ||
| What did you say? | ||
| Hoist with Bellator. | ||
| Yeah, he's signed with Bellator. | ||
| He's going to do, not as a fighter, he's going to be some ambassador. | ||
| You know, Scott Coker is a friend of the UFC. He used to own Strikeforce. | ||
| I think it's going to be a different relationship with Bellator. | ||
| And I think... | ||
| I think it's good for the sport. | ||
| Fuck yeah. | ||
| It's always good for the sport. | ||
| Look, they know what they're doing. | ||
| They know that they have a B-level organization. | ||
| There's nothing wrong with that. | ||
| There's nothing wrong with having a B. They have some great fights. | ||
| A lot of fun fights. | ||
| But, you know, they've got Emanuel Newton. | ||
| The UFC has Jon Jones. | ||
| You know, there's just... | ||
| Emanuel Newton is a very good fighter. | ||
| But he's not Jon Jones. | ||
| And, you know, they had fucking Hector Lombard who might be the motherfucker at 170. He might be the motherfucker. | ||
| It's scary. | ||
| He might be the motherfucker. | ||
| Everyone's terrified. | ||
| Everybody's scared of that dude. | ||
|
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|
Tyrone Wooden's like, uh, not really interested. | |
| Thanks anyway. | ||
| Don't want to do it. | ||
| I'm just going to take some time off. | ||
| Think this over. | ||
| And you know, who's scarier than Woodley physically? | ||
| Woodley's a fucking beast. | ||
| Uh, Hector Lombard. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Exactly. | |
| He looks like a centipede. | ||
| He looks like a centipede. | ||
| He's got dudes scared in him. | ||
| He looks like a cartoon shredded. | ||
| A bigger, scarier... | ||
| He looks like a buff dude in a real old, old cartoon where they'd be just like a dude who's just like really buff and he looks fake. | ||
| His ass and legs just don't even... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Me and Cal talk about this. | |
| He has a tailpiece on him. | ||
| I thought it was a professional bodybuilder with spray-painted sweats on. | ||
| Yo, dude. | ||
| I was like, what? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I was like, look at the ass on that one. | |
| Calum's like, Jesus, man. | ||
| He's just all judoed the fuck out. | ||
| Yeah, we haven't asked for days. | ||
| Oh, we did have some gay talk. | ||
| Okay, we did. | ||
| Okay, so we're all good. | ||
| Represent my boy Calum. | ||
| Just a tip. | ||
| Remember, we said that if we were gay, this place would be a mess. | ||
| Yes, yes. | ||
| We'd be having an orgy. | ||
| There wouldn't be no fight companion. | ||
| We'd be having an orgy watching the fights on ecstasy. | ||
| You'd pull your dick out and be like, what? | ||
| Darren Elkins won? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Shove it right back in One more Do you want the quitting? | |
| He called quits in his head, but someone called him out and there's 10 minutes left. | ||
| I got another one, bro. | ||
| Let's do it. | ||
| Let's go light! | ||
| It's not hard! | ||
| Let's hear what it sounds like when they introduced... | ||
| I can't go hard anymore. | ||
| I want to hear what it sounds like when they introduced Aldo. | ||
| Dude, you said light! | ||
| You said light! | ||
| Is there a volume button on that? | ||
| I want to hear this. | ||
| When they introduced Aldo, that place is going to go fucking shithouse insane. | ||
| Give it a good crank, Jamie. | ||
| Crank that bitch way the fuck up. | ||
| Look at the size of that place. | ||
| Jamie, don't listen to me. | ||
| Turn it down. | ||
| Crank it up, Jamie. | ||
| I just love hearing the Brazilian fans scream. | ||
| You ain't seen nothing. | ||
| Aubrey's been there. | ||
| Dude, it's like no other place in the world when it comes to the enthusiasm of the fans. | ||
| It's cooled off though. | ||
| I heard Ireland is cooled off. | ||
| More off the charts. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Listen, listen, listen. | |
| Here it is. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Defending. | |
| So far, it sounds like fucking Stephan Bonney. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You're never going to really grasp it unless you're there. | |
| This is not the part of Brazil that he's from. | ||
| He grew up on the other side. | ||
| But Conor McGregor in Ireland, huh? | ||
| I fought in Rio, and then I fought in Dublin, and Dublin was, and Rio is amazing, but Dublin was fucking insane. | ||
| They're just drunker. | ||
| Oh, they're drunk. | ||
| Well, they're wild people, man. | ||
| They're wild people, man. | ||
| At first I got them, I was kind of like, fuck this kid, Connor. | ||
| It was kind of annoying. | ||
| And then I'm sitting there watching him psychoanalyzing the whole thing and just kind of watching it all unfold. | ||
| I'm like, this motherfucker's crazy. | ||
| And everywhere you go in Ireland, they're like, oh, are you here for Connor? | ||
| Yeah, I guess so, right? | ||
| I guess that's why I'm here. | ||
| Here we go. | ||
| Mendes moving forward. | ||
| Oh, leg kick. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Mendez in his face right away. | |
| That's that Dwayne movement there. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's it. | |
| Look at this. | ||
| Never mind. | ||
| He does look like TJ. I lied. | ||
| Again. | ||
| Dude, looking good. | ||
| Landing shots. | ||
| Oh, shit! | ||
| Dude! | ||
| Aldo! | ||
| Mendez looking slick. | ||
| I love when Aldo gets ghetto like that. | ||
| Good right leg kick by Mendez right there, though. | ||
| This one might not go to decision. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| This is going to... | ||
| Someone's going to sleep, I think. | ||
| Oh, check that one. | ||
| Saw that one coming. | ||
| Good job. | ||
| Oh, right hand by Mendes. | ||
| The more he can make Aldo work like this, man. | ||
| Mendes got a little bit of a mouse in that left eye. | ||
| A little bit of a mouse. | ||
| And if Mendes... | ||
| Oh! | ||
| He's rocked! | ||
| He's rocked! | ||
| That was a big left hook! | ||
| Look at his legs! | ||
| It was wobbly, son. | ||
| Left hook. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, Jesus Christ, that fucking uppercut. | |
| Holy shit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I was going to the sky. | |
| Mendes, stop going southpawing him occasionally. | ||
| Fucking fearless, dude. | ||
| Good job. | ||
| Mendes looking to get this fucking title, man. | ||
| Are you kidding me? | ||
| This is fucking exciting. | ||
| Fuck yeah, it is. | ||
| Ooh, he's looking at uncork right there in that right hand. | ||
| Oh, Aldo lands one! | ||
| Ludwig creating monsters. | ||
| Seriously. | ||
| But look, now Mendes is right in front of him. | ||
| He doesn't want to do this. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I know! | |
| Move, Mendes! | ||
| Go back to what got you there. | ||
| Gotta get on your bike, man. | ||
| Yeah, well, you know what? | ||
| You get that feeling like you might finish this fucking guy. | ||
| And you're standing right in front of him. | ||
| I know, why are we doing this? | ||
| That's how Aldo catches people. | ||
| That's how Aldo catches people. | ||
| You don't want to be standing in front of him, man. | ||
| You want to go right back to what got you to that spot. | ||
| I mean, he's definitely recovered by now. | ||
| You've got to assume he's recovered. | ||
| He's going to throw a flying knee right here. | ||
| Maybe he hasn't recovered. | ||
| Maybe Mendes really... | ||
| He doesn't look the same. | ||
| He doesn't look the same. | ||
| Maybe Mendes knows he hurt him. | ||
| Like right there, that didn't look like he's... | ||
| Oh, a body shot. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Nice. | |
| Oh, another hard leg kick. | ||
| He's going to go high with it. | ||
| Oh, look at this! | ||
| And he hit a left hook. | ||
| That looks like it hurt him a little bit. | ||
| That left hook look like it hurt. | ||
| Mouse over the eyes, son. | ||
| Good defense by Mendez, too. | ||
| But Aldo's so goddamn sudden. | ||
| He can just end shit. | ||
| And everything he throws is perfect. | ||
| Mm-hmm. | ||
| Perfect technique. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh! | |
| Mendez just standing right in front of Aldo. | ||
| Who the fuck would have thought this? | ||
| Oh, vicious left! | ||
| Dude, nice jab by Mendez. | ||
| How much better did his fucking striking get? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Dwayne Ludwig. | |
| Fucking Ludwig is a wizard. | ||
| He really is a goddamn wizard. | ||
| A crazy OCD wizard. | ||
| Oh, nice left hook! | ||
| Goddamn! | ||
| Oh! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, damn! | |
| He's like, no more knees, please. | ||
| Oh, hard leg kick. | ||
| Oh, checked yours. | ||
| Dude, Aldo's lit up. | ||
| Look at his face. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, left hook over the top again! | |
| That's awesome. | ||
| Oh, man! | ||
| Oh, shit! | ||
| 137 to go. | ||
| Damn. | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
| What a fucking fight. | ||
| Listen to the crowd now. | ||
| Just miss with that epicot. | ||
| They're screaming at you. | ||
| Oh, you can't just eat that kick. | ||
| He just ate that one. | ||
| They're singing in the crowd. | ||
| Ate a jab right there, too. | ||
| Eye poke? | ||
| Come on, Rev. They're working it out, bud. | ||
| Oh, man. | ||
| They worked it out. | ||
| Don't give him a chance. | ||
| He needs to give him a chance. | ||
| Oh, man. | ||
| Back to the footwork, son. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| I hope Dwayne Lubbock's screaming that at him right now. | ||
| Yeah, he's trying to stay on him, but, you know, Aldo deserves his fucking rest if it's a legit eye poke. | ||
| Let's take a look at it right here. | ||
| Yeah, kinda hit his eyebrow. | ||
| That's not an eye poke where I come from. | ||
| In Aurora, Colorado, that's not an eye poke. | ||
| Okay, so the consensus is he's probably taking a little bit of a break right here, right? | ||
| Yes, 100%. | ||
| Bet and move. | ||
| 100%, right? | ||
| And there's nothing wrong with that, right? | ||
| This isn't his first rodeo. | ||
| Yeah, and look, it legitimately did go in his eye. | ||
| So he's taking a little bit of a break. | ||
| Maybe it hurts more than we... | ||
| Yeah, and he's allowed to. | ||
| You say a poke, I say it. | ||
| So if he's allowed to, it's not really cheating. | ||
| Did I get poked in the eye? | ||
| Yeah, he's probably not even saying anything. | ||
| Hey, it went in my eye. | ||
| Are you okay? | ||
| Went in my eye. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Ooh. | |
| Right back at it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Ooh! | |
| Right hand! | ||
| Oh, that left hook. | ||
| Oh! | ||
| Bendis takes him down! | ||
| Look at this scramble! | ||
| Mad scramble! | ||
| Kick to the body! | ||
| Hard kick to the body, man! | ||
| He could not keep him down! | ||
|
unidentified
|
A lot of time left! | |
| Finish him! | ||
| Finish him! | ||
| Oh, man! | ||
| You got to finish him for a minute! | ||
| Got to get that knee across. | ||
| Big left hand! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Go back to half guard! | |
| 18 seconds to go! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Half guard! | |
| Scrabble! - Come on, they got it! - Oh, God. | ||
| I'm having a heart attack. - They're too important. | ||
| Oh! | ||
| Green hand by Mendez! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Mendez, footwork! | |
| Oh! | ||
| Overcut! | ||
| Almost over! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh! | |
| The fucking bell! | ||
| He's fucked! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Holy shit! | |
| Holy shit! | ||
| He's out of it, man! | ||
| Look at him! | ||
| Holy shit! | ||
|
unidentified
|
He'll recover! | |
| He'll recover! | ||
| Holy shit! | ||
| What a fucking round! | ||
| That's like a movie round. | ||
| The wars coming out of these fucking two gyms together are just turning amazing. | ||
| Oh my god, what a fucking round. | ||
| Let's hear what Drano says. | ||
| That's one of the best rounds I've seen in a long book of time. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| Look at the end of the fight. | ||
| Boom! | ||
| At the buzzer! | ||
| He relaxed! | ||
|
unidentified
|
His eyes are closed. | |
| Mendez was beating him up at first, and then Mendez got done. | ||
| You see the girl in the background shaking her finger? | ||
| That was after the buzzer! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fucking asshole! | |
| Nature let me know! | ||
| She's gonna get on Twitter and then get fired. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Watch. | |
| That's gotta be Mendez's girlfriend. | ||
| Yeah, no Brazilian chick's gonna be wagging her finger at the camera. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Or, if she is, she's saying, you showed her not said shit! | |
| He recovered. | ||
| He's fine. | ||
| Yeah, you say that. | ||
| He's fine. | ||
| Are you crazy? | ||
| Dude, that guy is a fucking... | ||
| He might be concussed. | ||
| Dude, he might be concussed. | ||
| Cross-eyed birdies? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes. | |
| Dude, look at him right now. | ||
| You don't know, man. | ||
| The only one who knows right now is Chad. | ||
| That's it. | ||
| He's the only one who knows. | ||
| Look at his eyes. | ||
| I know. | ||
| Just me and Chad. | ||
| He's glazed Even if he does recover well, that was a stunning punch. | ||
| Back to the footwork. | ||
| Look at him. | ||
| Dancing around like an angel. | ||
| Dude, he took... | ||
| Like a tiny little buff angel. | ||
| He took a bunch of fucking punches off of his clock right there. | ||
| Look at him. | ||
| He looks beautiful. | ||
| Look at that stuff. | ||
| If he gets hit again, he's going to be, for sure, his chin's going to be diminished by that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| Are you crazy? | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| That was a slip. | ||
| No. | ||
| Eddie Bravo's giving up on doing commentary. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's just comedy now. | |
| Chad just looks better. | ||
| He's not moving on that left leg. | ||
| Every way, every level. | ||
| He's buying time with his footwork. | ||
| Oh! | ||
| Nut kick. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, no. | |
| He was trying to hit him with a knee. | ||
| He was trying to catch Aldo in his... | ||
| This break helps out Chad, though. | ||
| Here we go. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| This break helps out Chad. | ||
| This one does, yeah. | ||
| Unless the fight ends here. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| Dude, weird shit's happened before. | ||
| Let's take a look at it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, a strong, strong foot to the tank. | |
| Okay, now, Ian, if he's got a metal cup on, how much difference is it? | ||
| For the front, the dick and the balls, Beans and Frank, it's fine, but it's the undercarriage. | ||
| So that shot still hurts. | ||
| That one sucks. | ||
| In the taint? | ||
| Yeah, in the taint area. | ||
| Underneath, you still go up into your junk and it hurts. | ||
| I got kicked in the dick the other day, and I had a line bruise down half my dick. | ||
| In what circles does that conversation come up? | ||
| I got kicked in the dick. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It hurts when I pee. | |
| She's like, well, you got something to tell me? | ||
| I got kicked. | ||
| I got hit in the dick once so bad, I just started wearing a cup for jujitsu because my dick, I took my jock off and it was filled with blood. | ||
| Oh! | ||
| Yeah, and so I was thinking, God damn it, do I go to the emergency room? | ||
| And then I decided, what would I do if that was my nose? | ||
| I was like, if it was my nose, I wouldn't go to the emergency room. | ||
| So I just went home and I jerked off because I figured if my dick got hard, I didn't have to worry. | ||
| And it was okay. | ||
| It's weird how we're on the stage. | ||
| I pissed blood for a few days though. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Ugh. | |
| It was just a guard pass, too. | ||
| Somebody was passing my guard and he shoved his knee right into my dick hole. | ||
|
unidentified
|
See, as a girl, I get nervous about that. | |
| Like, I just wish y'all would wear cubs all the time. | ||
| I made kids after that, though, so it's all good. | ||
| Back to this fucking awesome fight. | ||
| Shit. | ||
| Oh, there's a hard one. | ||
| That was a hard one. | ||
| And he shook... | ||
| Why did he shake his finger? | ||
| Because he checked it. | ||
| He checked it? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Let's have a kill. | ||
| Well, this is the thing about Aldo. | ||
| Everybody knows that in the second, third, and fourth round, he starts to slowly begin his taper off. | ||
| And oftentimes in the fifth round, it's just not the same fighter. | ||
| For the first couple of rounds, he's a motherfucker. | ||
| Ooh, that rocked him. | ||
| But this was a crazy first round, and here we are in the second. | ||
| Nice body kick. | ||
| If Mendez might be starting... | ||
| Ooh, that was a good one. | ||
| Mendez might start to think that he's getting into him. | ||
| But you know what? | ||
| Mendes has not been known for his cardio either because he's such a beastly dude. | ||
| You know, those beastly guys, the Lombards and the Woodleys. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Too much muscle. | |
| There's so much muscle involved. | ||
| And so much fast twitch, too. | ||
| It's not that slow endurance runner muscle, you know? | ||
| Like the Nick Diaz type muscle. | ||
| That guy, you never see him tired. | ||
| This is a fucking great fight, though, huh? | ||
| Because this is where it gets weird. | ||
| It gets weird if you can get into the third, fourth, and fifth round. | ||
| Especially if Mendez starts getting loose. | ||
| Who won the first round? | ||
| Fucking crazy round, but I've got to say Aldo. | ||
| Because Aldo had him almost out cold. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| You've got to drop twice instead of once. | ||
| Yeah, and the last one was giant. | ||
| The last one was just a... | ||
| Oh, nice body kick! | ||
| Oh, shit! | ||
| Mendez getting loose! | ||
| Oh, shit! | ||
|
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|
Slipped! | |
| Oh, check that one. | ||
| Owie, owie, owie, owie, owie. | ||
| Left hook and right hand over the top. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Aldo loves that left hook. | ||
| He's got a fucking nasty whipping one, too. | ||
| No matter how much adrenaline you have, when you check a leg kick like that, shin to shin, it still hurts, right? | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Yeah, never did. | ||
| In the fight? | ||
| Well, unless you're one of those Thai dudes like Malapet. | ||
| You ever seen Malapet fight where he kicks guys shin to shin on purpose to break them down? | ||
| We just had Yotsin Klai at our gym. | ||
| Oh, God. | ||
| 145 pounds, kicking a bag. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| Never seen. | ||
| He's a ferocious guy, man. | ||
| One of my training partners just beat Malapet. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Who is it? | ||
| Shane Oblonsky, fighting glory. | ||
| Oh, no shit. | ||
| Dude, Yatzenklai fought in lion fights recently. | ||
| Holy shit, is he good. | ||
| He fought with the Indian guy. | ||
| Yeah, I love watching pure Thai. | ||
| Like those pure Thai fighters like him, like Malapet. | ||
| Yeltsin Kly is the motherfucker though, man. | ||
| He's 30 years old, right? | ||
| And he has some ungodly amount of fights. | ||
| 300 fights. | ||
| That's so crazy. | ||
| Yeah, him, Sanchai, Superbon, guys like that. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Because when they all come over, they come and hang out with my coach. | ||
| Oh, do they? | ||
|
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|
Really? | |
| Oh, that's amazing. | ||
| Is Tyrell the most hardcore? | ||
| They allow the most stuff? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, they allow you to clinch up and throw each other around. | ||
| You can kick dudes when they're on the ground. | ||
| Pretty much when they're on the ground. | ||
| You can throw them and shit. | ||
|
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|
Isn't that like Dracar? | |
| What is that? | ||
| That Draco fights? | ||
| Yeah, Draco. | ||
| They used to have Draca. | ||
| They used to have takedowns. | ||
| Moe Smith fought in that shit. | ||
|
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|
Is that the most hardcore? | |
| I'll go tag him again at the end of the round. | ||
| It just sweeps and kind of... | ||
| What's the most hardcore rule for striking? | ||
| Mendes got to get him thinking about the take time. | ||
| I'd say Muay Thai. | ||
| Mendes got to drag him into the third. | ||
| Because they just bludgeon each other. | ||
|
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|
But they just punch and kick it still. | |
| Wouldn't that be more hardcore if you let them hold? | ||
| I think so. | ||
| I think it should be Muay Thai rules. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I like lion fights better. | ||
| They allow full elbows, Muay Thai, they clinch up, they hold on to each other for a while, they ragdoll each other, knee to the body, elbow over the top. | ||
| They don't even have elbows in Glory. | ||
| Glory is all kickboxing, like Dutch style. | ||
| We have some amazing Americans right now. | ||
| I mean, you've got Kevin Ross, Joe Schilling, Romy Adonza, Kai Hollenbeck. | ||
| And these are all guys that we're friends with. | ||
| To watch them fight is fucking incredible. | ||
| How about Schilling's fucking fight in glory against... | ||
| What is his name? | ||
| Simon Marcus. | ||
| Simon Marcus. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| And then he fought... | ||
| So that was an extra round, so a fourth round. | ||
| Then he fought another fight and went three rounds. | ||
|
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|
Incredible. | |
| And then he went and fought in the finals and fought to a decision. | ||
| Incredible. | ||
| With Artem. | ||
| And Artem's a fucking badass. | ||
| Artem is a motherfucker. | ||
|
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|
Dude. | |
| He's so talented. | ||
| You see that spinning backhand that he hit him with? | ||
|
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|
Yeah. | |
| Let off the slip. | ||
| I just love the way he fights, too, with his hands down and moves like a snake. | ||
| Mendes coming at him now. | ||
| This is the round you picked it up in. | ||
| Yeah, this is the... | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| He's already... | ||
| He's got to show the shot. | ||
| I bet you that's the game plan. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, yeah. | |
| I bet it is the shot. | ||
| It's a slow pace. | ||
| Okay, now things are looking way better for Mendez. | ||
| You're digging into the third, fourth, and fifth rounds. | ||
| Traditionally, you're dealing with a different Aldo. | ||
| Oh, no. | ||
| No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. | ||
| We're a sad group of fucking non-fuck-gay orgy-having dudes. | ||
| Have you ever had someone cut your eye with their finger? | ||
| Have you ever cut your eye before? | ||
| No, but you know the Winklejohn story, right? | ||
| Mike Winklejohn, the great trainer from Jackson's Academy, went blind because a guy he was holding pads for, his toenail went into his eyeball, sliced his eyeball open and was oozing out into his hand. | ||
| Just fell out? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Oh man, this looks like a bad one. | ||
| You ever hear of Sean Bias? | ||
| Sean Bias. | ||
| Yeah, crazy fucking fighter from NorCal. | ||
| We were wrestling and I took his back and he went to grab my head and skipped his finger up my eyeball. | ||
| I was bleeding out of my eye. | ||
| That was one of the scariest moments ever, but also it hurt so bad. | ||
| Okay, here we go. | ||
| They're back. | ||
| They're back. | ||
| Is he going to take a point away? | ||
| No, he said next time. | ||
| Next time is take a point away. | ||
| Let's see. | ||
| Mendez, good defense. | ||
| He tagged him. | ||
| He tagged him. | ||
| He tagged him with that left. | ||
| Mendez with the left! | ||
| Oh, right hand of Aldo. | ||
| Goddamn, that's such a sweet right hand. | ||
| That's the one he hurt him with at the end of the first. | ||
| Yeah, dude. | ||
| Aldo's still here, man. | ||
| Great endurance in the starting round. | ||
| I wish Mendes would get to his wrestling a little bit. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| They show it to him like Kane does always. | ||
| Up and down. | ||
| It'll make him work, but I think he's worried that if he makes him work like that, then he'll be too tired to do what he needs to do to stay safe on his feet. | ||
| Right? | ||
|
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|
He burned a lot of energy earlier in the takedowns. | |
| But he wants to definitely be able to have the speed and movement. | ||
| This is the Dwayne Ludwig style, strategy style. | ||
| You know what's most interesting about this Dwayne Ludwig approach? | ||
|
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|
He didn't use it We went straight for a drain. | |
| Don't worry. | ||
| I just fire just straight Dwayne had nasty counters. | ||
| No, no risk clean work and no fucking no slop in any of his movement. | ||
| Yeah Like when he knocked out Jonathan Goulet with that right hand, that shit, he's backing up and that right hand comes off like a piston. | ||
| That's how great Dwayne is, is he knows... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh shit! | |
| He knows that the best possible style will be stuff that he doesn't... | ||
| Oh, hard left. | ||
| Dude, Aldo fucked him up with that jab. | ||
| Nice inside leg kick. | ||
| Dude, Mendez is trying to win this fucking fight. | ||
| When he gets hit, he's getting angry. | ||
| And he's like digging his heels in saying, no, not tonight. | ||
| Not tonight. | ||
| And he's a couple times been tagged and then come back and rocked Aldo. | ||
| Because he's just determined to win this fight. | ||
| But man, that's when you gotta be careful. | ||
| When you're moving towards Aldo, those counters come so sharp. | ||
| Who do you think's winning so far? | ||
| It's a good question. | ||
| I think Aldo's up 2-0. | ||
| Yeah, Aldo definitely won the first, I think. | ||
| In the second round, I would say it's close, but probably Aldo, right? | ||
| I would have to go over that again. | ||
| Oh, that was a nice left. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Aldo's up 2-0. | |
| You think so? | ||
| Definitely. | ||
| Both of you guys agree? | ||
| Yeah, I think Aldo's up 2-0. | ||
| I don't know about for sure. | ||
| What about this? | ||
|
unidentified
|
100%. | |
| Oh! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Big uppercut! | |
| He shook his head! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, shit! | |
| Aldo is hurt! | ||
| Wow. | ||
|
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|
He's throwing that uppercut and makes it look like he got hurt! | |
| Back and forth. | ||
| Oh, that knee again. | ||
| Damn, they hurt each other. | ||
| Aldo's fucking tired. | ||
| Back to his feet. | ||
| He is fucking tired, but he still dangers his shit. | ||
| He throws so hard. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh. | |
| God damn. | ||
| Dude, good sprawl by Aldo too, huh? | ||
| And now Mendes is eating shots. | ||
| He's trying to recover here. | ||
| Keep punching him. | ||
| I don't know why you're fucking stalling out. | ||
| He doesn't want him to complete that single, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh! | |
| Left hand hurt him! | ||
| Oh! | ||
| Get him down! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh shit! | |
| Look at this! | ||
| Look at this! | ||
| Wow! | ||
| Mendes is in fucking shit! | ||
|
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|
What a crazy fight! | |
| Holy shit! | ||
| Foot stomps! | ||
| Marco Hulas on him! | ||
|
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|
Look at that! | |
| He's going Marco Hulas on him! | ||
| I wonder why more people don't do that. | ||
| Does that hurt Brandon? | ||
| Do these hurt foot stomps? | ||
| Is it more like don't do it to me and I want to do it to you? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Is it like that? | |
| It's just like those cycle kicks in the front of the knee. | ||
| That's offensive. | ||
| It's kind of like, damn, man. | ||
| Yeah, like, dude, that's dirty, right? | ||
| Come on, bro. | ||
| The footstop and the front knee kick is horrible. | ||
| But he's not putting much into these knees, right? | ||
| Because he doesn't want to commit. | ||
| Oh, those are hard. | ||
| I love those. | ||
| He keeps missing. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, Dwayne's telling him to do it, if you look at him. | |
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh! | |
| That's a hard one, man. | ||
| He's like, okay, enough of that shit. | ||
| You're gonna break my pinky tongue. | ||
| Oh, they're right in front of each other here. | ||
| They're talking. | ||
| They're talking. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| I wonder what he said. | ||
| Oh, yeah, they're laughing at each other. | ||
| Oh, that... | ||
| Drop down now. | ||
| The plum, baby. | ||
| Look out for that knee, son. | ||
| He probably said fight of the night, son. | ||
| Oh, he tagged him with that left hook! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| Ooh, this shit is getting crazy! | ||
| Who won that round? | ||
| Aldo. | ||
| Man, I don't know. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| That one's talking back and forth. | ||
| I'm going to give that round to Mendez because of that. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| And then because of the end. | ||
| The fact that he got that takedown, got a hold of him, but Tim, Aldo did crack him right there, but Mendez recovered. | ||
| It's a hell of a fight. | ||
| It's a hell of a fight. | ||
| It's close. | ||
| Like, that round was close. | ||
| I forgot about Aldo dropping him there. | ||
| It's close. | ||
| But I think Mendes was controlling the end of the fight and tagged him at the end of the fight. | ||
| I give a lot of credit to the end of a round. | ||
| Or not the end of the fight, the end of a round. | ||
| I give a lot of credit to the end of the round. | ||
| I give a lot of credit to the end of a fight. | ||
| Because I feel like, and this is a stupid way to look at it, but in a street fight, it doesn't matter if a guy kicked your ass. | ||
| If the teachers pulled you off of him, you won. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| A guy can hit you with a one-two punch, kick you in the leg, punch you in the liver, you're getting fucked up, and then somehow or another he slips, and you wind up on top, and you're punching him in the face, and the teacher pulls you off. | ||
| Most people are going to think you won. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right? | |
| Who was on top at the end? | ||
| Oh, Danny was on top, bro. | ||
| He was going to kill that kid. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Even if you were in their guard about to get armbar too, huh? | |
| Yeah, sometimes people... | ||
| Well, that's a different one. | ||
| Depends on who's watching the fight. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Damn, Olo looks big. | ||
| He put a lot of muscle on, didn't he? | ||
| I was about to say he looks skinnier than usual. | ||
| I thought he looked real muscular. | ||
| Alright, here we go. | ||
| Whoa! | ||
| The deep, my friend! | ||
| Goldie almost had an aneurysm right there. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Deep. | |
| He's switching up a lot, man. | ||
| A lot of southpaw movement. | ||
| That's again, Dwayne. | ||
| Dwayne, aka Dominic Cruz. | ||
| Fourth round is deep water for Aldo. | ||
| This is where shit gets weird with him. | ||
| This is where Mark Hominick was on top of Aldo. | ||
| Don't ever forget that. | ||
| And Mark Hominick, a very good striker. | ||
| That was the fifth round, right? | ||
| Very good striker. | ||
| A mouse living in his house. | ||
| I didn't know Mike's made of hard ice tea. | ||
| It's like someone stored a can of pineapples in his forehead. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh! | |
| Mendez is still sharp, though, dude. | ||
| Mendez is still sharp. | ||
| He's in good shape for this fight. | ||
| That's a fact, man. | ||
| Good head movement, too. | ||
| Still switching up a lot, man. | ||
| And he's not backing off his pace, either. | ||
| Both these guys are, like, not committing, though. | ||
| They're getting real close. | ||
| They're touching, touching. | ||
| They're looking for that fucking burst Right hand over the top by Mendes Almost. | ||
| Made it again. | ||
| Leg kicks are slowed way down. | ||
| Aldo just shook his head. | ||
| They're talking. | ||
| And he's mad because... | ||
| Son, that sweet uppercut! | ||
| Oh, he's fucking him up, man. | ||
| He fucked him up with that left hand, too. | ||
| When was the last time we saw Aldo's face busted up like this? | ||
| This is unusual. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh! | |
| He went with a head kick! | ||
| Barely missed that. | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
| Dillashaw style. | ||
| Fifth round head kick KO. Well, listen, man. | ||
| He's putting a pace on Aldo in this fourth round. | ||
| And Aldo is coasting. | ||
| He's not doing anything. | ||
| And this is where Aldo has usually been in control of the fight. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh! | |
| He caught him with that left! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh! | |
| Right hand over the top! | ||
| What is he doing? | ||
| He's complaining that their heads are cautious. | ||
| Oh, he can't complain. | ||
| That's a weakness. | ||
| He knows he's getting fucked up. | ||
| You can't complain over shit like that. | ||
| You know what's going on, man. | ||
| I'd like to see Jay Hayes wrestling now, man. | ||
| Aldo's gonna get ghetto. | ||
| He just starts throwing fucking wild heat. | ||
| But you know what? | ||
| What he's throwing is not hitting. | ||
| He's getting him on the end of shit. | ||
| It's not having the same impact that Mendez has had in this round. | ||
| I mean, look at the faces. | ||
| Aldo is broken up, man. | ||
| Mendez is doing some fucking damage. | ||
| Does that give you confidence when you see your opponent has blood? | ||
| Yes. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It does. | |
| It gives you more cardio, too, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
We can kill it. | |
| What'd you say? | ||
| If it bleeds, we can kill it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
This fight is so fucking good. | |
| What movie is that? | ||
| Predator. | ||
| Predator, bro. | ||
| Arnold Schwarzenegger. | ||
| He just did a Schwarzenegger accent. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, they caught him at the right! | |
| Aldo caught him at the right at the very end of the punch, though. | ||
| Look at Aldo's face is fucking bloody. | ||
| Oh, man. | ||
| Oh, he got poked. | ||
| He got poked, man. | ||
| Okay, he's just gonna go right back in. | ||
| He's got better cardio right now. | ||
| Don't let him rest. | ||
| It's smart. | ||
| Stay on him. | ||
| Back to the leg kick. | ||
| What if he gets leg kicked to death? | ||
| That would be hilarious. | ||
| That would be hilarious. | ||
| But I think it's too late for that. | ||
| I think you gotta do some real groundwork in those fucking first few rounds. | ||
| Or you just go out and Edson barboza him here. | ||
| Edson Barbosa, he might have one of the nastiest leg kicks in all the UFC right now. | ||
| For sure. | ||
| Oh, by far. | ||
| Nasty. | ||
| He's one of the only guys who stopped two people by leg kicks. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Nice! | |
| He stopped Rafael Oliveira, and he stopped one of his earlier opponents. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh! | |
| Man! | ||
| Hard right hand by Mendez! | ||
| Goddamn! | ||
| Don't forget about Marco Huaf. | ||
| UFC 7. Mm-hmm. | ||
| Yeah, man. | ||
| He was the one who showed everybody what's up. | ||
| Paul Varlan, son. | ||
| Chopped down the polar bear. | ||
| Remember that shit? | ||
| Oh yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
17. Marco, who else was the king of the foot stomps too? | |
| Paul Varlance hit me up on Facebook. | ||
| Weird message. | ||
| No shit. | ||
| Weird message. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't know. | |
| I was going to make a comeback. | ||
| You want sponsor? | ||
| I was like, Paul Varlance? | ||
| Really? | ||
| What's up, bro? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Weird message. | ||
| That was a hard check. | ||
| Hard check there. | ||
| He's setting up something, jabbing that chest. | ||
| Trap fighting. | ||
| Damn. | ||
| I don't want to hear about that weird message from a 350 pound dude who lives in Alaska. | ||
| Oh, shit! | ||
| Come on, Chad. | ||
| Yeah, Chad can lose this round just by shit like that. | ||
| He's so fucking athletic, it's crazy. | ||
| Aldo? | ||
| Aldo. | ||
| It's so violent and awesome. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, shit. | |
| 10 seconds. | ||
| Go. | ||
| Right hand over top. | ||
| I'm Chad. | ||
| They must be yelling at him to turn it up here. | ||
| I wonder if he can hear Wayne in this fucking crowd. | ||
| I got a 2-2. | ||
| I think it's 3-1. | ||
| I think it's 2-2 as well. | ||
| You think it's 3-1 Aldo? | ||
| Yeah, I do. | ||
| 3-1 Aldo? | ||
| I got 2-2. | ||
| Oh, look at that uppercut. | ||
| Shit, son. | ||
| So you think Aldo won this round? | ||
| How did Aldo win this round? | ||
| No, I think Chad won this one. | ||
| Chad won this one in the last one. | ||
| I think the last one was kind of close, but I think the last one... | ||
| Chad definitely won this one. | ||
| I think the last one, they're going to give it to Aldo because he rocked him. | ||
| Yeah, and you said the end of the round. | ||
| I think Aldo's going to win that round in Brazil. | ||
| But the end of the round was Mendez winning the round. | ||
| Yeah, I agree on that. | ||
| I mean, I don't know. | ||
| I don't know either. | ||
| We're just drunk. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Talking shit. | ||
| That's so folks at homes that are fucking, like, you're like, oh, fucking, I can do commentary. | ||
| Guess what? | ||
| You could. | ||
|
unidentified
|
We sound exactly like you when we're watching, folks. | |
| You could. | ||
| This is fucking Ian McCall, one of the best flyaways on the planet Earth spinning through space. | ||
| And he does commentary just like you. | ||
| I don't fucking know. | ||
| What? | ||
| We're not that cool. | ||
| We're not that smart. | ||
|
unidentified
|
There was a couple times we were like, you forget that this is on air. | |
| You know? | ||
| There's a couple times like, what do you think is that I'm not saying? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't forget. | |
| I'm also sober, though. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, man. | |
| Look at all those eyeballs, bro. | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
| There's a lot of limited visibility in there. | ||
| This is the fifth and final motherfucking round. | ||
| I think who wins this round wins the fight. | ||
| This might be it. | ||
| Although it's in Brazil, don't forget that. | ||
| We might be about to see some crazy shit, man. | ||
| We might see some crazy shit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Mendes. | |
| You know Chad's going to bring it. | ||
| Aldo's got to turn his shit up. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh! | |
| Mendes with a left hand. | ||
| Switches up the side. | ||
| Oh! | ||
| Hard left hook! | ||
| Goddamn! | ||
| Woo! | ||
| We got any punch stats? | ||
| What a fight. | ||
| Fuck numbers, dude. | ||
| I don't want numbers. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, left hook. | |
| Sneaky left hook. | ||
| That was right around the guard. | ||
| Yeah, he whips it, you know? | ||
| He whips it to the body as well. | ||
| Oh, they like each other, man. | ||
| They're having fun now. | ||
| There's a lot of respect now after this fucking crazy war. | ||
| I mean, these dudes know each other like nobody knows each other. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh! | |
| Take down! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Take it down! | |
| That's the difference! | ||
| Take it down! | ||
| And he's fucking tired, too, man. | ||
| This is going to be hard as shit to get back up from here. | ||
| When he does get back up, he's going to be exhausted. | ||
| Now you strike, son. | ||
| And Mendes is gorilla strong at 145. That dude is a beast. | ||
| Look at the crowd booing. | ||
| If he wins, dude, this is the last Brazilian to hold a title. | ||
| Every fucking champion will be American if he wins. | ||
|
unidentified
|
USA! USA! Don't be a terrorist! | |
| Everyone chant USA! Corvette should just send them all cars. | ||
| Yeah! | ||
| Be American as fuck. | ||
| Drive around a Corvette, be a UFC champion. | ||
| I want that new Hellcat. | ||
| How do you like it? | ||
| It's dope. | ||
| Love it. | ||
| Love it. | ||
| 707 horsepower fucking Chrysler. | ||
| You drove it, right? | ||
| Yeah, I drove it when I was in Denver. | ||
| I drove it for the whole weekend. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They gave it to me. | |
| Why don't you get one of those? | ||
| I might. | ||
| I might get one of those. | ||
| They're only like, what, 65? | ||
| I just want to get an American muscle car. | ||
| But I'm thinking about a 1969 Mustang. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Nothing's better than your Porsche. | ||
| That was my brother's first car. | ||
| No, nothing's going to be better than a drive. | ||
| It's not going to handle the same, but it'll be different. | ||
| Oh, shit! | ||
| Yeah, Aldo pushes him off. | ||
| That was my brother's first car, the 69 Mustang. | ||
| It's a great car. | ||
| So pretty. | ||
| The aesthetics, the way it looks is amazing. | ||
| I think you're onto something with Corvette. | ||
| They take all the UFC champions if he wins, put them all together, put commercials together and shit. | ||
| American as fuck. | ||
| That's a commercial. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh! | |
| Left hand, right hand! | ||
| Look at that! | ||
| Oh, shit! | ||
| Let's go. | ||
| Dude, Aldo connected here, man. | ||
| This isn't good. | ||
| This is not good at all. | ||
| Let's see that jiu-jitsu. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| What about that? | ||
| What if he finished him here? | ||
| I don't know if he could stick on his back. | ||
| To finish here, my friend. | ||
| Any time. | ||
| 240. 240. And he's used to having Uriah crawling around on him. | ||
| That's true. | ||
| And up. | ||
| Up again. | ||
| Get out, son. | ||
| That's the thing about those guys. | ||
| They all have fucking wicked guillotine defense. | ||
| And kick knockout. | ||
| Still in front of each other. | ||
| Stay in front of each other. | ||
| Anything can happen in this kind of fight. | ||
| That's why he just stepped back. | ||
| Stepped off. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Step off again. | ||
| Keep moving. | ||
| Keep moving. | ||
| Light on the toes. | ||
| He hasn't really thrown that many leg kicks. | ||
| You rest in an hour. | ||
| One hour. | ||
| This is over. | ||
| You did a lot of training. | ||
| Oh, vicious over the top and left to the body first. | ||
| Oh, shit! | ||
| Oh, my goodness! | ||
| Oh, I attacked him! | ||
| Oh, shit! | ||
|
unidentified
|
His head snapped back like a fucking PEZ dispenser! | |
| Jesus. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| Buckle up. | ||
| Oh, that's so sad. | ||
| Aldo with that left-right again. | ||
| Aldo being very conservative with the kicks, too, man. | ||
| Very conservative with the kicks. | ||
| Oh my god, who the fuck is going to win this fight? | ||
| This 90 seconds might be it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
This is the fight, son. | |
| Chad just looked up at the clock. | ||
| This might be it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh! | |
| Left hand! | ||
| But he was moving away from that. | ||
| He was sliding to his left. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Again with the knee. | |
| No, no, no. | ||
| That foot was incidental. | ||
| Oh my god, there's no time. | ||
| He can't be taking any breaks here. | ||
| They're going to give it to Aldo. | ||
| Fuck! | ||
| They might. | ||
| They might. | ||
| This is a goddamn close round. | ||
| Anybody can win this round. | ||
| If it ends right now, they give it to Aldo. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I agree. | |
| This is 50 seconds. | ||
| Anybody can win this round. | ||
| Anybody wins this round with one successful flurry. | ||
| I said it would end right now. | ||
| If you can get a takedown, a big hit. | ||
| Yeah, I mean, but nothing stunning. | ||
| If Aldo stunned him here with something and had him wobbly, he would win the round. | ||
| He did stun him. | ||
| He did. | ||
| It just happened. | ||
| But not like before. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| Not too much. | ||
| I mean, because he stunned Aldo, too. | ||
| He snapped his fucking head back with that jab. | ||
| And he's looking for that uppercut again. | ||
| I love that combo. | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
| 20 seconds, man. | ||
| 20 seconds. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| Oh, body kick! | ||
| Come on. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Go. | |
| Cracking up 15, 15. Oh, check it! | ||
| You're fucking crazy, you think the Brazilian judges are going to give us the... | ||
| Oh, right hand by Aldo! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Go, go, go, go! | |
| They exchanged right hands there. | ||
| Oh, Jesus Christ, they're swinging! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh! | |
| Go! | ||
| - I do not know. | ||
|
unidentified
|
- We're gonna give it to Alba. | |
| - Woo! - What a fight, what a fight! - Alba stole that round. | ||
| - Is there any more of these pro bar things out there? | ||
| Yeah, there's a bunch in the back. | ||
| Those are fucking delicious. | ||
| They're really good. | ||
| They're really good. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Goddamn. | |
| That was a hell of a fight. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| What do we think here? | ||
| Aldo. | ||
| Aldo? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I think Aldo's going to win. | |
| Aldo for sure. | ||
| But who do you think won? | ||
| Everybody thinks Aldo won? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Very, very close. | |
| I think if I had to give anybody the last round, it'd probably be Aldo. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| You know what? | ||
| I think Mendez won the last round. | ||
| When he snapped his head back, that was one of the most significant shots in the round. | ||
| They're going to give it to Aldo. | ||
| It was close enough where they were like, you know what? | ||
| They're just going to give it to him. | ||
| I would like to see the numbers, you know, because we're watching it and having fun. | ||
| Left hook, that was early. | ||
| That was the first round. | ||
| Look at the numbers, it's Aldo all day. | ||
| If you look at the numbers. | ||
| If you look at the damage, it's probably midgets. | ||
| Yeah, that's true, right? | ||
| If you do significant strikes, it's going to be Aldo all day. | ||
| Oh, look at that right hand. | ||
| Oh my goodness. | ||
| Oh my goodness. | ||
|
unidentified
|
A few more seconds, that could have been a finisher, too. | |
| That left hook to the body is so vicious. | ||
| The replays, you know how powerful the replays are for the judges? | ||
| They're looking at the replays. | ||
| That looks like three rounds to Aldo right there. | ||
| And also, the crowd sways judges, too. | ||
| This is Mendez. | ||
|
unidentified
|
The replays, dude. | |
| Oh, Jesus Christ. | ||
| Maybe look at the replays and go, if that's what they're showing, that's what they saw. | ||
| Okay, but let's look at this. | ||
| I mean, that is a big goddamn round. | ||
| So that was round three. | ||
| So round three was definitely Mendez. | ||
| Right? | ||
| That was the one he really heard of. | ||
| That was the clearest round for Mendez. | ||
| Round four was like, who the fuck knows? | ||
| So round three was definitely Mendez. | ||
| Round four was who the fuck knows. | ||
| And round five, you know... | ||
| Round five is so close. | ||
| Who the fuck knows, man? | ||
| Who the fuck knows? | ||
| Great fight, though. | ||
| So you guys think Aldo by decision? | ||
| Aldo by a slight decision. | ||
| Meanwhile, whoever won, what a fucking fight. | ||
| Yeah, Jesus Christ, that was amazing. | ||
| Amazing. | ||
| Wow, unbelievable. | ||
| What a fight. | ||
| You know how much shit Conor McGregor is going to talk after this fight? | ||
| I don't think he wants some of this. | ||
| He got lit up by a midget. | ||
| Imagine what I'll do to you. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Imagine what I'll do to you. | |
| Aldo. | ||
| What does he say? | ||
| I'll knock his head clean off. | ||
| I'll knock his head clean off. | ||
|
unidentified
|
All the way back to Dublin. | |
| Winner by unanimous decision. | ||
| They're very happy in Brazil. | ||
| Very, very, very, very good fight. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Great fight. | |
| Fun, wild fight. | ||
| You know, that's everything you want in a fight. | ||
| Two elite fighters going at it, changing direction, changing the tide, back and forth. | ||
| Both guys get tested. | ||
| Both guys have to overcome. | ||
| Fucking amazing fight. | ||
| Powerful, big, handsome Brian Stan with a napkin coming out of his pocket. | ||
| They try to give me that shit. | ||
| I'm like, put that goddamn napkin away. | ||
| It's not going in my fucking pocket. | ||
| You have them wearing suits, though. | ||
| Yeah, I don't wear the jacket, though. | ||
| I gave up on the jacket. | ||
| They used to make me wear the jacket. | ||
| They got me all these beautiful suits. | ||
| They had them custom made from my bridge troll body. | ||
| They fit great. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You always have to wear long sleeve shirts? | |
| No, I just do. | ||
| I don't want to be distracting. | ||
| So I don't want to show tattoos. | ||
| That's why I wear long sleeve mostly on stage too. | ||
| It's just distracting. | ||
| It's one more thing for people to think about. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Damn. | |
| What's he saying? | ||
| He's all caught up, too. | ||
| Look at his left eye. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Holy shit. | |
| He's gonna party with him after the lines after. | ||
| Good night. | ||
| I go no gi. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| Well, hey folks, what a fucking fight. | ||
| What an awesome card. | ||
| So, powerful Phil Davis. | ||
| That was a big victory for Phil Davis. | ||
| Yeah, that was huge. | ||
| He looked like a monster. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| That was like the best Phil Davis of all time. | ||
| Especially after that last performance with Anthony Johnson. | ||
| Fucking amazing return. | ||
| He didn't really throw any leg kicks, huh? | ||
| Aldo did not throw that many. | ||
| I mean, he got lit up with some of his own. | ||
| I mean, of Mendes. | ||
| It's right off the bat. | ||
| But this was a fucking test, man. | ||
| And he survived a really motivated, really well-trained Chad Mendes. | ||
| But what a fucking close fight. | ||
| What a great fight. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Interesting division, man. | |
| I don't even know how he can say he thinks he deserved to win. | ||
| You know, I mean, he won. | ||
| Why say I think I deserve to win? | ||
| You fucking won, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Might be looking at his face. | |
| I guess so. | ||
| I mean, it was a close fight, but everybody in this room thinks that he won, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
But isn't that kind of a common thing when someone walks away, way more damage than the other? | |
| Yeah, sure. | ||
| But you know, that damage can come from one exchange, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Like, you see Chris Algieri, when he beat that Provodnikov guy? | ||
| He got lit up in the first round, closed his eye almost completely shut, and then outboxed him for the remainder of the fight. | ||
| He did a tremendous, tremendous job. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And some people have more scar tissue. | |
| Some people do take damage a lot worse than others from lighter strikes. | ||
| Jose Aldo. | ||
| That's a motherfucker right there. | ||
| That's the motherfucker. | ||
| What do you guys think in the pound for pound thing? | ||
| Like, he used to get tossed around as being impossible. | ||
| I think he is. | ||
| I always have. | ||
| Do you still think he is after this fight? | ||
| Number one pound for pound? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, I do. | |
| Really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| No, that's what you think, Joe? | ||
| No. | ||
| No, I think it's probably Mighty Mouse. | ||
| I really do. | ||
| I mean, I think Mighty Mouse... | ||
| Gester's better than Mighty Mouse. | ||
| Yeah, McCall might be better than Mighty Mouse. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I am. | |
| If you beat him, I really think that you probably deserve pound for pound best. | ||
| I just think that if I look at technique for technique, okay, and I look at what he's been able to pull off in title fights, he's, like, flawless, you know, in title fights. | ||
| I think there's other guys fighting tougher guys. | ||
| You might be right. | ||
| And that's the thing about, like, 205, and that's why Jones comes into... | ||
| Look at John Jones, look at Kane, Blasquez. | ||
| John Jones is maybe it. | ||
| Real quick, you put all those guys in a room, John Jones and Kane are going to twist everyone's heads off. | ||
| And don't even... | ||
| I hate when people put Ronda in there. | ||
| Pound for pound? | ||
| Oh, God. | ||
| It's hard to do with a woman. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| It's hard to do with a woman. | ||
| I don't agree with that at all. | ||
| I think women's MMA, pound for pound, she's number one of all time. | ||
| And how about women? | ||
| Ever that walk the face of the planet, she's number one of all time. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Number one. | |
| There shouldn't even be a list. | ||
| There should just be a list. | ||
| Pound for pound, Rhonda. | ||
| There should be anyone else. | ||
| There's probably some crazy Mongol bitch, though, from like 1220. That stinky pussy would get bitches and triangles. | ||
| Pound for pound mean males. | ||
| Not males and females. | ||
| If Ronda Rousey is the ultimate chick ever, and I agree, that puts her on that pound... | ||
| The pound for pound means... | ||
| Weight doesn't matter. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| You want to see pound for pound? | ||
| Put Ronda Rousey in there with Hennon Burrell. | ||
| Yeah, that's so crazy. | ||
| Do you have any idea what TJ would do to her? | ||
| It's silly, man. | ||
| I didn't look at it like that. | ||
| You're right. | ||
| Hennon Burrell would kick some bitches' heads. | ||
| Are you sure, though? | ||
| Are you sure Hennon Burrell would beat Ronda Rousey? | ||
| We're talking about pound for pound. | ||
| They're the same weight. | ||
| Do you know how crazy that fight would be? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| That would be a ruthless, wife-beating... | ||
| It would be cool. | ||
| It would be so horrible. | ||
| If you go pound for pound, or you talk about the toughest man in the world, it's usually the heavyweight champ, or it's Jon Jones. | ||
| I've rolled with Ronda a lot. | ||
| Oh, no, no, no. | ||
| Look, if they had to roll together, it's a different scenario. | ||
| But they don't. | ||
| They have to MMA fight. | ||
| And when you're talking about kickboxing, Hennenborough can do shit she can't do. | ||
| Hennenborough's a black belt, son. | ||
| Even if they roll, it's not going to go well. | ||
| It's not going to go... | ||
| But look, he's a man. | ||
| He's a strong man. | ||
| And he can fucking kick ridiculously hard. | ||
| He can punch ridiculously hard. | ||
| He can hit you with a standing knee. | ||
| Like a front kick, he can knee you in the face like that. | ||
| She might. | ||
| Or she might wake up with a flashlight in her face. | ||
| Maybe. | ||
| We don't know. | ||
|
unidentified
|
We don't know. | |
| It's stupid to include women pound for pound. | ||
| And she says that, by the way. | ||
| Rhonda says that, by the way. | ||
| Yeah, I know. | ||
| They asked her, and she's like, a woman fighting a man is ridiculous. | ||
| It's just stupid. | ||
| And it is stupid. | ||
| It's silly. | ||
| Goldie, no hanky. | ||
| Brian Stan, hanky. | ||
| Goldie wins. | ||
| No, no. | ||
| See, I give Brian Stan the win because Goldie has that three-piece suit on. | ||
| I hate the three-piece suit. | ||
| Which one has more makeup? | ||
| That's the real question. | ||
| For sure, Goldie. | ||
| Oh, the three-piece suit? | ||
| Goldie needs a nap and a drink of water. | ||
| And Stan has such pretty eyes. | ||
| Conor McGregor is next. | ||
| He's playing Dennis Seaver, right? | ||
| Yeah, if he beats Dennis Seaver, and Dennis Seaver is no fucking pushover. | ||
| Dennis Seaver's got that sneaky front leg roundhouse kick. | ||
| Good matchup for Connor. | ||
| What if Cub beats Frankie, though? | ||
| He's shorter. | ||
| Great matchup for Connor. | ||
| Look, if Cub beats Frankie by substantial margin, or Frankie beats Cub by substantial margin, whether by decision, submission, or knockout, they probably, in my opinion, are ahead on the ladder. | ||
| The problem is, Conor puts ass in seats. | ||
| That's why you saw his fucking picture, and he's hanging out with Dana White down there in Brazil. | ||
| And a lot of people are like, here we go, Swanson and Edgar. | ||
| This is, in my opinion, this is the real number one, number two title fight. | ||
| Contender fight. | ||
| But it doesn't mean that I don't think that McGregor's up there with them. | ||
| I think he definitely is. | ||
| But here we're looking at a guy like Cub Swanson that has a fucking litany of broken bodies in the UFC to his career. | ||
| I mean, look at what he did to Dennis Seaver. | ||
| Cub deserves it more. | ||
| If Conor beats Dennis Seaver, okay, that's great. | ||
| That's a good fight. | ||
| Look at what Cub did to Dennis Seaver. | ||
| Cub lit Dennis Seaver on fire. | ||
| Cub's the most talented MMA fighter I know. | ||
| He's fantastic. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's crazy. | |
| Frankie Edgar's a motherfucker and he never stops moving. | ||
| He cuts crazy angles. | ||
| He's got ridiculous wrestling. | ||
| He's got more heart than any fucking human being that's ever walked the face of the planet. | ||
| He recovers better from a beating than anyone I've ever seen in my life. | ||
| It's not about that, though, is it? | ||
| It's not about that. | ||
| Conor's entertaining, people want to see him fight, so they're going to give him the title shot. | ||
| But, how about this? | ||
| In New Jersey, Frankie Edgar versus Conor McGregor for the number one contender. | ||
| Holy shit! | ||
| That slammed You know what you do? | ||
| This is what you do, man. | ||
| You go to Jose Aldo and go, I heard you hurt your foot. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Stop peeling off thousands. | |
| Listen, my friend. | ||
| We're talking about an interim title. | ||
| We're not talking about the real title. | ||
| Keep peeling off cash. | ||
| Dana White should fucking... | ||
| Everybody throw your cell phone in the bucket and we'll go into this room. | ||
| Shut the door. | ||
| Can you do Joey Diaz doing Conor McGregor? | ||
| Listen, cocksucker. | ||
| I'm the number one contender. | ||
| I put asses in seats. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm the guy. | |
| Nobody wants to see you with your fucking faggy SoCal tattoos. | ||
| Oh, I like palm trees. | ||
| Get the fuck out of here, dude. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm from Dublin, motherfucking Ireland, okay? | |
| You're from California. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You're sitting in the fucking HOV lane in an electric car. | |
| Cock sucker, I'm on a horse. | ||
| I'm on a horse. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's raining out all day, and I'm drunk. | |
| I'm the number one contender, dog. | ||
| I'm going to fucking fill up a soccer stadium. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's what he would say. | |
| But Joey would leave after he said that while you were laughing. | ||
| Fuck this shit! | ||
| And he'd just walk out the door. | ||
| We would be hanging around the comedy store. | ||
| He would say some shit like that and then just walk away on the punchline. | ||
| Just walk away! | ||
|
unidentified
|
It was such a master showman. | |
| Walk away on punchlines. | ||
| Well, this fucking podcast is over, folks. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Jose Aldo's the shit. | ||
| Chad Mendes is a motherfucker. | ||
| That was a goddamn awesome fight. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Phil Davis is a beast. | |
| Phil Davis came back strong tonight. | ||
| Neil Magny, five in a row, son. | ||
| Okay, what do you guys think about Hunt and Verdun? | ||
| What about that shit? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Verdun. | |
| Vadum looked deadly in that last round. | ||
| Yeah, remember it's at elevation. | ||
|
unidentified
|
So it's at 7,500 feet. | |
| Is that Mexico City? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| The highest elevation in any UFC fight ever. | ||
| If you remember, Mark Hunt fought in Denver and we fought Rothwell. | ||
| It might have been the worst heavyweight fight in history. | ||
| They won't come back to Denver and put heavyweights on the card it was so bad. | ||
| Right, but meanwhile they have a heavyweight title. | ||
| So now you have a heavyweight title. | ||
| Oh, you have three weeks? | ||
| Oh, you weigh 305 pounds? | ||
| That's every division right now. | ||
| He's got to lose so much weight, too. | ||
| He's got to lose 30-something pounds. | ||
| You're crazy. | ||
| I would love to see Hunt just fucking... | ||
| I like just seeing Hunt win. | ||
| But I also like Verdum. | ||
| Well, if Verdum wins, he speaks really good Spanish. | ||
| They reschedule it again. | ||
| He fights in Mexico against Kane. | ||
| I mean, god damn. | ||
| Maybe if Kane comes back healthy. | ||
| Amazing. | ||
| They're going to do Mexico again with Kane? | ||
| It's hard to gamble. | ||
| It depends on how well this card does. | ||
| This card does really well in Mexico. | ||
| It sells really well. | ||
| But now the problem is Kane's not the headliner anymore. | ||
| They even said, like Dana White said publicly, like, we can't go to Mexico without Kane. | ||
| And Diego's hurt too. | ||
| Diego's out too. | ||
| So Diego's out. | ||
| Kane's out. | ||
| And the Mexican kid. | ||
| What's his name? | ||
| Eric Perez? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Is he out? | ||
| I don't know if he's out. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| Is he out too? | ||
| I don't think he's out for sure. | ||
| I thought I heard that. | ||
| That's such a bummer, man. | ||
| All these guys getting injured. | ||
| Heavyweight division, wide open! | ||
| Big Brown beats Travis Brown. | ||
| What's up? | ||
| This is what I wanted to ask you guys about. | ||
| You two guys especially. | ||
| What did you think about the... | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| Soft. | ||
| What did you think about the Kung Lee thing? | ||
| That's a situation that was really weird. | ||
| He got popped, allegedly, for a high growth hormone, right? | ||
| And then they say that the test is ridiculous and there's a bunch of people who weighed in on it that are apparently experts in the protocol and the way everything was handled. | ||
| And then the UFC, for the first time ever, rescinded it. | ||
| If it doesn't fit, you must acquit. | ||
| What is that? | ||
| It's tough not to look at that picture of Kung Lee and be like, oh wow, yeah, you're not on protein and, you know what I'm saying? | ||
| Because he's in his 40s and he never looked like that before. | ||
| If you've seen that picture, it's insane. | ||
| He looks like one of those gorillas they brought up there, one of those apes. | ||
| He looks jacked and shredded. | ||
| And he tests positive for HGH, but he also got his ass whooped. | ||
| But he didn't test positive for HGH. He tested positive for elevated human growth hormone levels, and they don't have a baseline for him. | ||
| That's the problem. | ||
| People have weird endogenous levels of all sorts of hormones. | ||
| There's a reason why some people are depressed. | ||
| Why are they depressed? | ||
| They have bad levels of serotonin. | ||
| Some people that have had head injuries have low levels of testosterone. | ||
| So he might just naturally have some weird thing where he has a lot of growth hormone. | ||
| He just might naturally, when he hits 40, get super shredded, puts on 20 pounds of muscle, And that's how it goes. | ||
| Look, it's true. | ||
| Oh, look at the pictures of him. | ||
| See, that's normal. | ||
| That's normal when you hit 40. We all look like that, man. | ||
| He does look retarded and ridiculous. | ||
| He's for sure going to be in the next Expendables. | ||
| But he's been an athlete his whole life. | ||
| He's done Kung Fu since he was three. | ||
| That doesn't look like a real ab. | ||
| If I had an ab like that, I would quit working out forever. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'll just take pictures of that shit and send it out. | |
| Done. | ||
| I did it. | ||
| Made the best abs of all time. | ||
| Suck it. | ||
| I'm over. | ||
| That's the best abs maybe ever. | ||
| Right? | ||
| I'm not mad at him. | ||
| He's a cutie pie 100. No bullshit. | ||
| Have there been better abs? | ||
| No. | ||
| There's been different abs. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| That's a set of abs. | ||
| That might be the best abs an MMA fighter has ever exhibited. | ||
| And Lee, because he's such a kicker, kicking is all your core and your abs and your obliques and shit. | ||
| It didn't really help him though, did it? | ||
| He looks great. | ||
| If it's the Olympia, yeah, man. | ||
| He hasn't fought in a couple of years, and he fought Bisping, who's a cardio machine. | ||
| Bisping has a 34... | ||
| Don't you have like a 38 beats per minute? | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| Big brown, a heavyweight with a 38 beats per minute resting heart rate. | ||
| Same as Michael Phelps. | ||
| What, what, son? | ||
|
unidentified
|
What, what? | |
| Swim in the pool. | ||
| Just like a fucking swimmer. | ||
| He smokes weed, though. | ||
| That's why his heart rate is so low. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| He's just not even sure he's taking a test. | ||
| I'm natural. | ||
| I hate to want to be, but I was 37 yesterday, two days ago. | ||
| You are 100 pounds, my friend. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I know. | |
| He just carried me around all day. | ||
| No, that's impressive, man. | ||
| How much do you walk around that, seriously? | ||
| Not in fight shape, like 50. Oh, that's not that small. | ||
| So, 115 and you drop down to 125. How much of it is water? | ||
| How much of it is water weight? | ||
| 10, 12 pounds. | ||
| That's a lot, though. | ||
| Your body weight per percentage, you got to think about it, as opposed to like a heavyweight 10 pounds ain't shit. | ||
| But when you get down to like 125, 10 pounds is quite a bit, right? | ||
| What I'll do is I'll do... | ||
| I got to Ireland at 18 over, I think. | ||
| But it was just like, it was the easiest cut I've ever had because my diet and all this stuff, I mean, I've got my diet super tuned in. | ||
| This company makes all my meals. | ||
| It's called the Gorgeous Mix. | ||
| My buddy makes all my meals. | ||
| It's 15 meals a week that are vegan. | ||
| And then I eat meat because I'm not vegan. | ||
| I was going to make a rude comment and say I'm not homosexual. | ||
| Did they use gluten? | ||
| I hear there's a lot of gay people that like hot dogs. | ||
| So I don't think that makes any sense. | ||
| Oh shit, I came with it. | ||
| I came with it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Do you eat gluten? | |
| I try not to. | ||
| You try not to? | ||
| You try not to too, right? | ||
| I did gluten-free for my last camp. | ||
| I gotta be honest, I didn't feel that much of a difference. | ||
| I gotta think, dude, a guy like you or either one of you guys is burning off so much goddamn glucose in a day. | ||
| You know, you're burning off so much sugar that I don't think it would hurt to have like a little pasta in your diet. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I just don't. | |
| I don't think we're talking about a regular person. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's not that I think about it. | ||
| I get some pasta made. | ||
| I had a bag of gummy bears before I hit Mr. I was like, fucking Anderson Silva. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| For reals, man. | ||
| In a bag of gummy bears. | ||
| Someone gave me a small bag of gummy bears. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I ate them right before training. | ||
| I don't know what it is. | ||
| Were they marijuana gummy bears? | ||
| Or were they gummy bears that were like candy gummy bears? | ||
| They might have been like A-Rap gummy bears. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| You know what that's called? | ||
| Those are gummy bears. | ||
| Before someone fucking screws me over. | ||
| They were Harvey old gummy bears that you get at Ralph's. | ||
| So just the sugar, you needed it. | ||
| The sugar. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You needed it. | |
| I don't eat sugar ever. | ||
| Literally ever. | ||
| It's not bad to have some simple sugar if you're working out the way you're working out because you're burning off so much fucking calories. | ||
| You got to think about just a grappling workout where your body feels like when it's over and they say the best thing to drink is chocolate milk because it has so many different things in it. | ||
| It has the casein, the milk protein. | ||
| Well, Aubrey would know better than anybody. | ||
| Let me say the ratio is two to one, right? | ||
| Especially if you've got raw chocolate milk, then you have the enzymes in there to help break down the milk. | ||
| Because that's the problem that causes an inflammatory response because it's hard to break down when it's pasteurized. | ||
| If you had raw chocolate milk, that would be... | ||
| So he's saying if I had a cow... | ||
| Suck the teeth. | ||
| Onnit's raw chocolate milk. | ||
| No, you can get raw milk from some health food stores, like Sprouts. | ||
| It has raw milk. | ||
| Or it'll be a bitch and just take some Onnit protein. | ||
| No, dude, I'm telling you, raw milk, if you're like a non-milk drinking person, I have a totally different reaction between drinking regular milk and drinking raw milk. | ||
| Totally different reaction. | ||
| I don't like any of that shit. | ||
| Raw milk just seems to have no, my body has no problem with it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I like rice digested. | |
| What about rice milk and hemp milk? | ||
| Red milk is not milk. | ||
| It's weird fucking water. | ||
| But it's not bad for you. | ||
| It's milky-ass water. | ||
| It depends on if it's sweetened. | ||
| But it's sweetened almond milk. | ||
| Oh, that's sweetened. | ||
| That's a lot of sugar, dude. | ||
| It's not bad. | ||
| Duncan Trussell called me up the other day. | ||
| He's like, Dude, I found the best thing! | ||
| Almond milk! | ||
| It's so healthy. | ||
| It's so good for you. | ||
| I go... | ||
| I go, does it taste really good? | ||
| He goes, yeah. | ||
| I go, that's sugar. | ||
| And he goes, really? | ||
| I go, look at the label. | ||
| And he goes, oh my god, 18 grams of sugar per serving? | ||
| I go, yeah, it's sweet. | ||
| You're drinking sugar water. | ||
| Usually if it tastes good, it's not good. | ||
| What about the unsweetened version? | ||
| Unsweetened tastes like asshole milk. | ||
| It tastes like they just rub your own. | ||
| It can get a little sour, but you can make your own. | ||
| It's really easy. | ||
| All it is is you just take raw almonds and you blend them up. | ||
| Same with making hemp milk. | ||
| You take raw hemp seeds and blend them up. | ||
| How about you just eat almonds and drink water and stop being a bitch? | ||
| The emulsification actually creates the milk. | ||
| Right, but is there a benefit in that emulsification? | ||
| Is there better just to buy it? | ||
| No, but if you're making a smoothie or something and you need the liquid and you want to get that flavor. | ||
| There's for sure a better way to spend your time than blending up almonds on your own. | ||
| Being one of those weirdos that soaks almonds and tries to get some of your own almond milk. | ||
| None of my friends do that. | ||
| And there's no benefit. | ||
| No benefit. | ||
| Is this going to make you dick grow? | ||
| No. | ||
| Is it going to make you smarter? | ||
| No. | ||
| Is it going to help you recover faster? | ||
| No. | ||
| It's going to remind you how awesome milk is. | ||
| Drink some coffee. | ||
| Make some Coco Pops with that shit. | ||
| Is raw milk good? | ||
| Like my daughter has rheumatoid arthritis. | ||
| Would it be good for them? | ||
| Yeah, I mean, raw milk or raw goat's milk would probably be even better. | ||
| Even pasteurized goat's milk is way easier for your body to digest than cow's milk. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You want to limit the inflammatory response. | |
| And the problem with anything pasteurized is it kills all the natural enzymes that help you digest it. | ||
| So it's going to cause a greater inflammatory response. | ||
| Raw will help you out with that. | ||
| What is it about goat's milk that makes it, even when pasteurized, more digestible? | ||
| Why goat's milk? | ||
| Yeah, something with the composition of the actual milk itself. | ||
| Human milk and goat's milk are more closely affiliated than bovine milk. | ||
| There needs to be a company that sells breast milk. | ||
| So it's just a little bit closer. | ||
| I heard human milk has crazy amounts of level of growth hormone in it. | ||
| There's some bodybuilders like, yo dawg, can I get that breast milk? | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
|
unidentified
|
You'd think that'd be huge! | |
| It's in the supermarkets. | ||
|
unidentified
|
The ads. | |
| The human milk. | ||
| This big ass double H's. | ||
| Colostrum is really great. | ||
| You mentioned that. | ||
| We're taking a hard look at that because that's the first milk that comes out and that's the most nutritious. | ||
| Every mammal produces colostrum. | ||
| How much do you lose, though, when it breaks down into a powdered form? | ||
| Because I know they sell powdered colostrum that you can pour into smoothies and shit, but what is that even, really? | ||
| It's like a freeze-drying process, usually. | ||
| Right. | ||
| I think you lose some, but you still get a lot of the nutrients in there. | ||
| You have to, right? | ||
| Even with greens or with anything. | ||
| Once you break it down to a powder, whatever benefit you get, it might be substantial, but it's definitely less than it would be for fresh. | ||
| Heat destroys nutrients more than that process, though. | ||
| So it's better than, you know, really over... | ||
| Pasteurization? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Oh, that's interesting. | ||
| So powdered is better than heated? | ||
| Generally, yeah. | ||
| For most things. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| That's weird, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Mm-hmm. | |
| Let's go eat. | ||
| Yeah, let's get some stuff. | ||
| Can you eat late, slight? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| It's pretty late. | ||
| A little baby. | ||
| All of a sudden. | ||
|
unidentified
|
We want story time with Big Brown. | |
| Story time with Big Brown is like my favorite thing. | ||
| Big Brown tells those stories on the podcast. | ||
| We're still on the air here, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
| Let's mind our P's and Q's. | ||
| The walls have ears. | ||
| Big Brown would lose his job. | ||
| He tells those stories on the podcast. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He might have the best podcast of all time. | |
| That's the way you go out in a blaze of glory. | ||
| A goddamn Bon Jovi song. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Go ahead. | |
| Last thing, last question. | ||
| Bisping, Rockhold. | ||
| Who knows? | ||
| Who knows? | ||
| You got a thought. | ||
| You know, I trained with Bisping. | ||
| He's a beast, man. | ||
| He can go five rounds right now. | ||
| He's in shape all the time. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| All the time. | ||
| That's a big factor, right? | ||
| Yeah, but I think his eye is a big factor. | ||
| I think Rockhold's big. | ||
| I think Rockhold's a monster. | ||
| Mm-hmm. | ||
| They've been talking a lot of shit. | ||
| Yeah, that's what they do, right? | ||
| That's what they do. | ||
| Yeah, but Bisping's used to it. | ||
| Bisping told me this. | ||
| He goes, man, I just want to fight more, so I talk shit to guys. | ||
| Give him a response so I can get fights. | ||
| He's a genius. | ||
| Yeah, it works. | ||
| All of us want to fight more, so you just talk some shit. | ||
| Joe Silver goes, oh yeah, that's cool. | ||
| There's that matchup. | ||
| There you go. | ||
| When are you talking shit to Iron Sheik, make that shit happen. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Well, after everyone's talking about these stories and shit, I'm good. | |
| He can't even walk. | ||
| He's a poor guy. | ||
| His hips are shot. | ||
| His knees are shot. | ||
| He's fun, though. | ||
| Alright, fucking podcast is over. | ||
| Master Eddie Bravo, give us your information. | ||
| People want to get a hold of you. | ||
| 10thplanetjj.com. | ||
| Kareem Abdul-Jakamal. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, Newport Tattoo, Newport Beach. | |
| Give me your full name. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Kareem Maserani. | |
| Hit me up on Instagram, Kareem Tattoo. | ||
| Holla. | ||
| Uncle Creepy MMA. Uncle Creepy MMA.com. | ||
| Uncle Creepy on everything MMA. And when's your next fight? | ||
| How's your hand doing? | ||
| It's all better now, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, it looks good! | |
| Is that where it goes? | ||
| The thing is, I can actually make some sort of a fist now. | ||
| As opposed to before, I used to poke straight out. | ||
| When I hit people with it, it's fucking awesome. | ||
| Is it ever going to straighten out? | ||
| No. | ||
| Are you purposely making a kryptonite? | ||
| Yes, I am. | ||
| That's what he does. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I think when he starts punching, a wolverine claw starts to come out. | |
| Damn, that's intense. | ||
| Can you get it fixed? | ||
| How many operations did he have on that? | ||
|
unidentified
|
This is fixed. | |
| That's fixed? | ||
| I've had three operations and one infection, two breaks. | ||
| And this break was gnarly shattered. | ||
| Damn, you might need one more. | ||
| I'm glad your girlfriend's here. | ||
| I'd ask you rude questions about your fingers. | ||
| What you do with them. | ||
| You can do the math, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
| Big Brown versus Travis Brown. | ||
| December 6th, UFC 181. Fighting the Kid Podcasts. | ||
| Glorious. | ||
| What do I got for you? | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's it. | |
| Friday the Kid Podcast, at Brendan Schaub. | ||
| Aubrey Marcus, Warrior Poet US on Twitter. | ||
| The On It Podcast, of course. | ||
| The Warrior Poet Project. | ||
| Is that what you call it? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yep. | |
| Warrior Poet Project. | ||
| Check out my Watch Human documentary. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Amazing documentary about psychedelic experiences in the Amazon. | ||
| I play those fucking Ikaroji gave me. | ||
| I play them in my car when I'm in traffic. | ||
| That brings me to a special place. | ||
| That's awesome, man. | ||
| And Miss Two Jits, right? | ||
| Miss Two Jits on Twitter. | ||
| Alright, folks. | ||
| Fucking thing's over. | ||
| Go do something with your time. | ||
| Productive. | ||
| Because if you're still listening to me at this point, get a life. | ||
| Okay? | ||
| Good night. | ||
|
unidentified
|
See ya. |
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