April 15, 2013 - The Joe Rogan Experience
02:54:34
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| Speaker | Time | Text |
|---|---|---|
|
unidentified
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Hey, you dirty bitches. | |
| And we're back. | ||
| This episode of the Joe Rogan Experience Podcast is brought to you by Ting. | ||
| Ting is a mobile phone company that we've talked about on this podcast many a time. | ||
| Because they're one of my favorite sponsors. | ||
| Because you would think, like, if you look for something cool, you'd say, well, you know, maybe like... | ||
| A company that sells paintings is cool or a company that makes sculptures is cool. | ||
| But you don't think of cell phone companies as being cool. | ||
| They're just cell phone companies. | ||
| But when a cell phone company goes out of their way to give you a service that, first of all, it's a better deal. | ||
| It feels more ethical from a business standpoint. | ||
| They allow you to cancel your contract at any time. | ||
| They credit you on unused service, which I've never heard of before. | ||
| If you use less than you thought you would, Ting actually drops you down and they credit you the difference on your next bill. | ||
| They drop you down to the next level, like whatever you actually did use. | ||
| I've gotten so many Twitter messages from people that tell me that they're saving money every month since they switched over. | ||
| Like one dude was spending like 90 something dollars on another cell phone company and he said he brought it down to 18. Now that's fucking insane. | ||
| I don't know what his use was like but if he's telling the truth, if he's not just some crazy troll making shit up, I cannot verify or deny. | ||
| I bet he was, like, on an iPhone, barely using it on a Verizon plan, and then he switched down to, like, a Galaxy S3. You know what I mean? | ||
| Could be, yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
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Those iPhones cost a lot of money. | |
| Did you look at the Mega yet? | ||
|
unidentified
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Yeah, yeah, yeah. | |
| What the fuck? | ||
| We looked at it last week. | ||
| But did you take a look at it? | ||
|
unidentified
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Oh, no, no, no. | |
| You fucked with it? | ||
|
unidentified
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No. | |
| Or investigated? | ||
|
unidentified
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No. | |
| Yeah, apparently they're going to do two of them. | ||
| Whatever. | ||
| What they have, the Samsung Galaxy Note 2, is amazing. | ||
| If you want a giant phone, you really don't need anything more giant than that, I don't think. | ||
| I never thought you would need one this giant. | ||
| But they have it at Ting. | ||
| They also allow you to combine your service, so you and your wife, you and your friend, whoever, you can share a bill and split time. | ||
| Go to rogan.ting.com and save $25 off either service or one of their phones. | ||
| We're also brought to you by Hover. | ||
| Hover is the internet domain name company that's actually owned by the same people that own Ting, and they have the same sort of attitude about it. | ||
| And it's an excellent service. | ||
| A service that I personally have used. | ||
| If you use it, you can get things that most domain name companies will charge you for. | ||
| They give it to you for free. | ||
| Like, who is domain name privacy? | ||
| Or, you know, if you want to register DickPartyInMyMouth.com Hey! | ||
| DickPartyInMyMouth! | ||
| Do you think there's one in that? | ||
| Let's go look for that. | ||
| DickPartyInMyMouth! | ||
|
unidentified
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DickParty! | |
| Dick party in my mouth. | ||
| I just registered hot girls do things. | ||
| What kind of things are you thinking? | ||
| I shot a bunch of videos with hot girls doing things like hot girls step on meat. | ||
| Just doing random stuff. | ||
| Hot girls step on meat? | ||
| Yeah, and they just saw these girls in high heels stepping on meat. | ||
| They wanted to raise money for this web series, this girl band. | ||
| And I was like, you guys should just be in bikinis doing stupid things like hot girls. | ||
| Hot girls scold the shit out of me. | ||
| And they're just doing all kinds of random stuff. | ||
| It's gonna be good. | ||
|
unidentified
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What's the promotional code? | |
| Go to Hover.com forward slash Rogan and you can get 10% off your domain name registrations. | ||
| They're a cool company. | ||
| They support the podcast. | ||
| We support them. | ||
| So please, go get yourself some, son. | ||
| We're also brought to you by Onnit.com. | ||
| That's O-N-N-I-T. Powerful Steve Rinella is here, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
| Look at him. | ||
| I figured we'd get the ads out of the way before you got here, not to bore you. | ||
| Wrap around sunglasses. | ||
| You sexy savage, you. | ||
| Goddamn. | ||
| Please have a seat. | ||
| He's got big hands, doesn't he? | ||
| He's an animal. | ||
|
unidentified
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Look at him. | |
| Goddamn manly, man. | ||
| I watched him hike this weekend. | ||
| I watched the whole episode. | ||
| They shot nothing. | ||
| They hiked in Montana for days. | ||
| Freezing cold. | ||
| Yeah, Dan Doty was sleeping outside. | ||
| It was a terrifying episode. | ||
| You were there now? | ||
| Dude, they were there in November before Thanksgiving. | ||
| Dan Doty slept outside. | ||
| No tent. | ||
| You're crazy. | ||
| Let me get through this ad real quick. | ||
| If you go to Onnit.com, there's a whole bunch of new shit that's been added to Onnit, especially in the strength and conditioning department. | ||
| We started this new company called Primal Bells. | ||
| The first one is this chimpanzee that looks like he's biting your dick off. | ||
| That's what I like to think of when I'm working out. | ||
| That's what I'm trying to avoid. | ||
| We've got more coming. | ||
| We've got this badass gorilla coming. | ||
| I don't want to tell you all of them, but there's a lot of really cool ones coming out. | ||
| Essentially, it's art. | ||
| We're hiring people to sculpt these things, these ideas that we have. | ||
| And we're getting people that work in the special effects companies, the ones that do shit for movies. | ||
| I think those chimpanzee ones are. | ||
| It's amazing. | ||
| I'm a little obsessed. | ||
| It's amazing. | ||
| By the way, for you people in French, it's pronounced chimpanzee. | ||
| Chimpanzee. | ||
| Keep going. | ||
| The chimpanzee. | ||
| C'est le chimpanzee qu'est le bel. | ||
| Get in there, son. | ||
| Get in there. | ||
| There's no meat in those bundt cakes, brother. | ||
| It's all right. | ||
| There's something had to die to make butter, I think. | ||
| Mm-hmm. | ||
| Go to O-N-N-I-T and if you use the code name Rogan, you will save 10% off any of the supplements, including Alpha Brain, Shroom Tech, all the groovy shit that we talk about on the podcast all the time. | ||
| There is always new shit and interesting shit that we sell. | ||
| Every time we find out anything cool on the web, like Blendtec blenders, or when we found out about Bulletproof Coffee, according to Dave Asprey, a lot of coffee that you're getting has fungus on it, mycotoxins, and you don't get the same experience from drinking that as you do from drinking coffee that's fungus-free. | ||
| He believes it's way less wearing on your system He thinks a lot of the crash that people associate with drinking coffee is actually your body reacting to the mycotoxins. | ||
| And that regular, good, clean coffee, like what he sells is called bulletproof, upgraded coffee, is mycotoxin-free. | ||
| So you're drinking right now. | ||
| Are you saying myco or myco? | ||
| Myco. | ||
| Mycotoxins. | ||
| They're tiny little fungi that grow all over coffee, apparently. | ||
| Have you ever seen that show, Dangerous Grinds? | ||
| No. | ||
| Or Deadliest, whatever the fuck it was called. | ||
| It was a guy would go all over, dangerous grounds. | ||
| A guy would go all over the country to really exotic places where they would make coffee, where they would grow coffee. | ||
| You know, there's a lot of coffees growing in like Guatemala. | ||
| Rwanda. | ||
| And Kona, some of the best, is in Hawaii. | ||
| But these, you know, it requires like a specific climate. | ||
| And this guy would go there and he said one of the real issues is a lot of this stuff gets toxic. | ||
| It gets mold grows on it. | ||
| And if you drink that, you're drinking like mulled soup. | ||
| That's really interesting. | ||
| Totally makes sense. | ||
| Totally makes sense and it's something nobody ever thought about before. | ||
| But Dave Asprey thought about it and we were like, let's sell Dave Asprey's shit. | ||
| Let's sell Bulletproof Coffee. | ||
| How does he keep it from being mulled? | ||
| They get it from a single source. | ||
| One company takes care of it from the moment the plant is grown. | ||
| It's all about putting it in the correct environment and making sure that it doesn't have access or exposure to any of these funguses. | ||
| So we sell all that shit at Onnit. | ||
| Go to Onnit. | ||
| Oh, N-N-I-T. Use a code named Rogan. | ||
| And go fuck yourself. | ||
| All right. | ||
| Stephen Nell's here. | ||
| Brian Count's here. | ||
| Let's get freaky. | ||
| Hit the music, Brian. | ||
| Joe Rogan, he is the best. | ||
| It's Joe Rogan. | ||
| Do you not know how to do it? | ||
| He is a man. | ||
| Brian already forgot. | ||
| Oh, I know what he's doing. | ||
| He's going to put the silly one on. | ||
| No, I just forgot to do it. | ||
| Do you have the silly one? | ||
|
unidentified
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No. | |
| That's all right. | ||
| We just played that one a couple of days ago. | ||
| Mr. Ronella. | ||
|
unidentified
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What's going on? | |
| What's up, brother? | ||
| How are you, man? | ||
| Good to see you again. | ||
|
unidentified
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Good to be back. | |
| Where's my bear me? | ||
| You know, we have all gone through a very unique and spectacular experience together. | ||
| Yes, we have. | ||
| You do it on a regular basis. | ||
| But all of us, like, doing that together, I'll never forget that. | ||
| I'll never forget that trip for the rest of my life. | ||
| We had a great fucking time. | ||
| I watched the episodes twice now. | ||
| Really? | ||
| And I love them, and I thought it was shot really well. | ||
| I thought the music was amazing. | ||
| I thought it was amazing. | ||
| It turns into Blood Brothers. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| To be out in the field, man. | ||
| No doubt. | ||
| Yeah, it's totally different. | ||
| Yeah, and to see how people respond, too, to, like, waking up in the fucking freezing cold and, you know, nobody bitched out. | ||
| Everybody kept it together. | ||
| No way. | ||
| That's important. | ||
| You could take some fucking Seth Green type characters with you on the road. | ||
| Sorry, Seth Green. | ||
| I don't know why I picked on you. | ||
| How about me? | ||
| How about Joe Rogan type character? | ||
| Well, that doesn't make sense because I did it. | ||
| But I mean, there's a lot of people out there. | ||
| Sorry, Seth. | ||
| I have no reason to take shots at you. | ||
| I'm just playing. | ||
| Did I tell you what the anthropologists did? | ||
| They did that study about how men who show up in a bar all done up in jewelry and why they get beaten up traditionally or why there was this so much like actual violent pressure for men to actually conform to a haircut and to a look like – the joke is men, they have two criteria for how they dress. | ||
| They don't want to look like a pussy and they want to be comfortable. | ||
| They mainly don't want to bring attention to themselves. | ||
| Like you don't see a guy, unless you're wearing an Ed Retardi shirt, but you know, those guys are usually jacked and ready. | ||
| But for the most part, men will wear things that are like, you know, blues and grays and, you know, simple stuff. | ||
| Because this anthropologist was talking about the idea that if you, it goes back to how men used to hunt in groups. | ||
| And if a man, if you guys were all set and we're going to go hunting and all of a sudden I show up in a bunch of sparkly shit and bangles that are making a bunch of noise, you guys are going to be like, you're going to spook the fucking deer. | ||
| They can see it a mile away and you're making like, but I like these. | ||
| I don't buy this. | ||
| No? | ||
| You're getting shut down, son. | ||
| I want to hear your point of view on it. | ||
| Because look at how... | ||
| I mean, look at the way that a lot of indigenous hunters today still adorn themselves. | ||
| Yes, but they don't... | ||
| Not when they go hunting, though, right? | ||
| Isn't that for traditional dancing stuff, but not... | ||
| No, like, you might go to hunt or go into battle with, like, face paint or elaborate jewelry, or there's so many accounts of, like... | ||
| Comanche who would wear wedding veils and stuff that they gathered during raids and just crazy clothes. | ||
| Well, I would always wear a wedding veil. | ||
| I think that's important. | ||
| Wedding veils. | ||
| I don't want the deer to see my expression change. | ||
| But you know what? | ||
| But your thing that I contested, and I don't mean to act like I'm the final Santa, but it reminds me of something similar that's equally interesting. | ||
| And it's that like... | ||
| I was reading this book on human evolution, and he was arguing, like, how could it ever be beneficial to be a daredevil? | ||
| Right. | ||
| To be like, what is the selective advantage to being a daredevil? | ||
| And this guy argues that it's your saying to, a man is saying to females, you're like, I'm so ridiculously fit, you know, that I can do something so stupid And still thrive. | ||
| And still breed you. | ||
| That's how fit I am. | ||
| When you get to shit like wingsuits. | ||
| How about fighting bulls? | ||
| I don't think men would fight bulls. | ||
| Yeah, but fighting bulls is kind of a scam. | ||
| Because there's a lot of other dudes involved. | ||
| It's not just a matador in the bull. | ||
| There's other dudes stabbing the bull. | ||
| They put poison darts into the bull. | ||
| They do a lot of creepy shit. | ||
| Is that right? | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| There's other dudes that stab the bull. | ||
| Yeah, the piccadillas. | ||
| Yeah, but when you're in a fucking wingsuit, you're in a wingsuit, okay? | ||
| Those crazy assholes that jump off those mountains, and they're going 100 miles an hour in those suits, have you seen them fly through cities, like through the middle of buildings? | ||
| No. | ||
| Dude, there's a guy, he jumps out of a plane in fucking Brazil, okay? | ||
| Jumps out of a plane, and does this wingsuit shit, and goes flying over the city... | ||
| Through buildings. | ||
| There's a gap in between these two buildings and he shoots through these two buildings before he pulls his parachute and lands. | ||
| Is he flapping? | ||
| No, he's soaring. | ||
| He's just gliding. | ||
| It hurts your head when you're watching it. | ||
| You're like, shit, what is he gonna do? | ||
| You're gonna die, yeah. | ||
| How much can you really totally control it? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I mean, I don't know how much you can really steer it. | ||
| But this guy, there you can see him. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| Are you kidding? | ||
| Yeah, that's him. | ||
| It's him in the wingsuit. | ||
| This is the camera. | ||
| And look at that. | ||
| He flew. | ||
| Oh, my God! | ||
| Oh, Jesus Christ. | ||
| No! | ||
| Yeah, look at this. | ||
| Are you kidding me? | ||
| By the way, it was Misty. | ||
| Okay, it was... | ||
|
unidentified
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Oh, that guy's a badass. | |
| So who's behind this viral vault through the air? | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| That's Norwegian Yoki Sommer and Frenchman Ludovic Werth. | ||
| Stuntman sponsored by Red Bull. | ||
| It was more than me. | ||
| Sponsored by Red Bull. | ||
|
unidentified
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Red Bull's gangster. | |
| Well, Red Bull sponsored the highest. | ||
|
unidentified
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Oh my god. | |
| Imagine they had to calculate when the first flight takes off, so you don't get torpedoed in the air by a fucking plane going 500 miles an hour. | ||
| Yeah, do you think you can time the plane, how fast the plane's coming at you as you're flying down towards it? | ||
| No, they're going 600 miles an hour. | ||
| Yeah, you ain't gliding away from that thing. | ||
| That's a rocket. | ||
| And so if that guy lands, and then a woman is like, I'm so impressed by that, I'd like to go out with you for drinks tonight, it would demonstrate that there's a selective advantage there. | ||
| Yeah, there's a selective advantage towards... | ||
| And being a daredevil. | ||
| Yeah, there's definitely. | ||
| That totally makes sense. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Evolutionarily. | ||
| And it also makes sense that we have a disdain for people that are wearing jewelry and dressing flashy and attracting a lot of attention to ourselves. | ||
| Because classically, that person who aims to stand out so strongly ruins everything. | ||
| They get too loud. | ||
| They turn things into fights. | ||
| The person is really loud and flamboyant. | ||
| It's just a natural instinct. | ||
| The feeling you get is like, oh, look at this fucking guy. | ||
| What is this guy going to bring to the party? | ||
| Yeah, he's not a team player. | ||
| He's some crazy asshole with jewelry on. | ||
| What's he doing? | ||
| Like Criss Angel. | ||
| Why's he wearing a fur? | ||
| I get annoyed at Criss Angel because he's too into his body and he's too into his ripped jeans and I'm always like, I don't know, I'm sure I'd like him, but when I see him, I'm like, I'll punch that guy in the face, man. | ||
| On top of the fact that he's really muscular, he's kind of a good looking guy, so I'm a little jealous of him at the same time. | ||
| I'm like, yeah, I don't like that. | ||
| Maybe I'm a little attractive. | ||
| That's probably one of the best ways to get girls ever, to be a beautiful magician. | ||
| Oh, he's awesome. | ||
| Beautiful, handsome magician with a great body. | ||
| He's great. | ||
| Must be ridiculous. | ||
| You've got to love the guy. | ||
| Yeah, it's like there's an evolutionary advantage in that way. | ||
| Are you kidding? | ||
| There must be, right? | ||
| I do magic. | ||
| To be able to trick that many people into thinking that you're mysterious? | ||
| He's awesome. | ||
| I mean, what are you doing? | ||
| I mean, every magician is a goddamn trickster. | ||
| That's all they're doing. | ||
| They're just tricking you. | ||
| I'm very good friends with David Blaine. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And women love him. | ||
| Love him. | ||
| I'm good friends with Penn Jillette, and women love him. | ||
| How about that? | ||
| That's even more impressive. | ||
| That's impressive. | ||
| Because Dave's a good-looking guy. | ||
| He's got this mystery and, you know, tall and dark and stuff. | ||
| Pendulant's a bad motherfucker. | ||
| Is that pen like... | ||
| Penn and Teller? | ||
| Yeah, that guy. | ||
| Did I ever tell you about David Blaine who tried to fight Mike Tyson? | ||
| What? | ||
| Did I ever tell you the story? | ||
| Tried to fight Mike Tyson? | ||
| I run into David on the street, and he's just jacked. | ||
| I mean, he's built like me, but he was just so muscular. | ||
| I was like, David, what are you doing? | ||
| He goes, I was training for eight months to fight Mike Tyson. | ||
| And when he went to a trainer, it might have been Teddy Atlas or something, he goes, I want to fight Mike Tyson. | ||
| And I think it was Teddy. | ||
| I'm sorry, David, or someone like that. | ||
| And he goes, the trainer goes, Well, what's the trick? | ||
| And David said, nothing. | ||
| I just want to last three rounds. | ||
| And the trainer goes, not in this lifetime. | ||
| And he goes, no, but I think if I train hard, he goes, you're not going to... | ||
| I'm not training you to fight Mike Tyson. | ||
| You won't last five seconds. | ||
| You never fought in your life. | ||
| You're a magician. | ||
| If there's not a trick, it's not going to happen. | ||
| And Mike Tyson, you know... | ||
| He thinks David's magic, apparently. | ||
| So that didn't happen. | ||
| So he goes to another trainer. | ||
| And the trainer goes, what's the trick? | ||
| And David goes, there's no trick. | ||
| I just want to do it. | ||
| And he goes, I'll take your money, but it ain't going to happen. | ||
| I'm going to tell you up front. | ||
| And he goes, no, no, I want to do it. | ||
| So David pays him a crazy amount of money. | ||
| And they start. | ||
| And he trains for six months. | ||
| And finally, they put him in the ring with his cruiserweight. | ||
| Just a guy who's there. | ||
| Cruiserweight. | ||
| Tall, thin guy. | ||
| You know, who can box. | ||
| And David said that the guy jabbed him once. | ||
| The guy was, bam! | ||
| And David went, oh! | ||
| Oh my God! | ||
| He thought he was going to die. | ||
| And the guy goes, you alright? | ||
| And he goes, I don't want to. | ||
| And then he hit him again. | ||
| And David was like, that's it. | ||
| I can't. | ||
| He took two jabs. | ||
| He goes, I can't fight. | ||
| This is crazy. | ||
| He had no idea how hard somebody could hit. | ||
| And the guy goes, we've been telling you that the whole time. | ||
| That's a jab from a cruiserweight who's not even a top pro. | ||
| You're talking about one of the hardest hitters in the game of all time. | ||
| David was like, oh, well, guess I can never do that. | ||
| When was he trying to do this? | ||
| This was a long time ago. | ||
| I... Like when Mike Tyson was boxing still? | ||
| It was right when he retired, I believe. | ||
| Right when he retired. | ||
| Why would Mike Tyson do that? | ||
| He's ridiculous. | ||
| Why would he think that Mike Tyson would be willing to do that? | ||
| Well, I don't know. | ||
| I'll talk to Dave and I'll come back with... | ||
| But that's kind of insulting. | ||
|
unidentified
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Yeah. | |
| For him to even think that Mike Tyson, one of the greatest fighters of all time, would be willing to do that. | ||
| Well, David's the kind of guy who just loves endurance. | ||
| He loves thinking about the hardest thing to do. | ||
| Like, he wanted to cross... | ||
| I don't know if I can say it on air. | ||
| Right, but a fighter only has... | ||
| I mean, even though Mike Tyson would run through him like a hot samurai sword through a molten piece of butter... | ||
| A fighter only has a certain amount of fights in his life. | ||
| And a certain amount of times you can punch a man in the head with your hands without him breaking. | ||
| A certain amount of times you can explode moving on somebody and not tear a muscle. | ||
| You only have a certain amount of those in your life. | ||
| That Mike Tyson would waste one of them, even if it would be a quick crushing... | ||
| Why would he waste one of those fighting a guy like David Blaine? | ||
| That's so arrogant. | ||
| Like, you should have a fucking... | ||
| You really think you could be a boxer and fight Mike Tyson? | ||
| Have an amateur fight. | ||
| I don't think he knew. | ||
| I think a lot of guys... | ||
| It goes back to what we were saying. | ||
| A lot of dudes... | ||
| And we meet a lot of these guys in LA. A lot of guys don't really understand what it's like to be hit by somebody who can really hit you. | ||
| You don't have that experience. | ||
| Your experience comes from what? | ||
| Movies. | ||
| Where you see a guy get punched in the face and he comes back and hits again. | ||
| So you think that's how it is. | ||
| Until you get hit by a guy who really understands how to hit and your whole world... | ||
| Your whole world changes... | ||
| It's very difficult to relax, too, when someone's hitting you. | ||
| And one of the things that happens to people is they freak out. | ||
| And their stress level goes up so high, they lose complete control of their ability to control their breath. | ||
| And they get exhausted and they fall apart. | ||
| It's like one of the main things that happens. | ||
| And it's because... | ||
| They can't process the actual reality of getting hit. | ||
| If you've been hit before, you can calm yourself down, even though you know that, like, wow, I just got hit hard, but we gotta keep moving, we gotta keep your eyes open, hands up, and you start, like, calming yourself down. | ||
| But that's a process you have to get really, really, really used to. | ||
| You ever see boxers where the guard's taking a jab and then he has his eyes open and he's countering? | ||
| Like, eyes open while a guy's punching your face. | ||
| Like, they get so comfortable with it, they eat jabs with their eyes open. | ||
| It's incredible. | ||
| Diaz, Nick Diaz is really good at that. | ||
| Nick Diaz can actually eat your jab and keep coming. | ||
| He's one of the few guys I've seen who's got that... | ||
| That's not a good move. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Well, no. | |
| He should always get the fuck away from punches, man. | ||
| Did you see the HBO Boxing this weekend? | ||
| That Donair fight? | ||
| No, but did you see that Bradley fight? | ||
| With Bradley and... | ||
|
unidentified
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Did you see the chick fight? | |
| Yeah, that was insane. | ||
| Did you not see the Bradley... | ||
| Hopkins? | ||
| No. | ||
| Bradley, what's that guy from Siberia? | ||
| It was the fight of the year. | ||
| Just recently. | ||
| It was the craziest thing I've ever seen in my life. | ||
| The guy that he fought in Rocky III? No. | ||
| This Siberian guy fights out of Freddie Roach's gym. | ||
| And it was the craziest thing. | ||
| It's the craziest... | ||
| Oh, I know. | ||
| I know exactly what you're talking about. | ||
| His eyes were shut. | ||
| It was a crazy fight. | ||
| Yeah, don't tell anybody what happens because it's so crazy. | ||
| Anyway. | ||
| It's the best fight I've ever seen. | ||
| People who have no respect for that, people who have never been beaten, you don't have any idea what those guys are sacrificing to try to entertain people. | ||
| It's the biggest sacrifice you could ever make physically without dying. | ||
| It is. | ||
| And what's really interesting is some people have a genetic, like an ability to take punches that you as a human being should never be able to deal with. | ||
| Like even watching Big Country when he was taking those knees to the face. | ||
| You ever see that? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You called a fight. | ||
| Incredible. | ||
| Like, how he can take that kind of punishment to his head is the nuttiest thing I've ever seen. | ||
| A lot of it is in his mind, too. | ||
| A lot of it is your determination. | ||
| The physical build of your face, that's one. | ||
| Like Mark Hunt, like that big fucking thick head. | ||
| That Samoan head. | ||
| Would you say the physical what of your face? | ||
| Physical build-of-your-face construction. | ||
| It seems that guys with really thin faces, like narrow jaws, have more of an issue with getting knocked out, whereas big, square-jawed guys are more difficult to knock out. | ||
| Well, they say that fighting trainers look for a short neck and a wide face. | ||
| Yeah, that supposedly is the best. | ||
| David Tua, perfect example. | ||
| One of the best chins of all time. | ||
| Lennox Lewis cracked him on the jaw and he just sort of wobbles back and forth and keeps moving forward. | ||
| David Tua had a ridiculous jaw and his head is as wide as a football field. | ||
| I worked out with his strength coach and who got him ready for his first fight. | ||
| And his strength coach said that David Tua had never squatted. | ||
| And he put him on the squat rack. | ||
| He put 490 on the squat rack. | ||
| And Tua went from... | ||
| He took the weight, 490 pounds, and didn't do a regular squat. | ||
| He did a deep squat. | ||
| He did an all-the-way-down squat and then came back up with no problem. | ||
| And he was like, how much do you practice squatting? | ||
| And Tua was like, I don't practice squatting, bro. | ||
| I'm just, you know... | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't know. | |
| How much weight was that? | ||
| He goes, that was 490 pounds with no belt or anything. | ||
| You just put it on your body and went all the way down. | ||
| He goes, you're not supposed to go all the way down. | ||
| You just have to go down to where you put your butt on. | ||
| What kind of shitty trainer was that guy? | ||
| Why the fuck did he put so much weight on and why didn't he tell him how to do it first? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| That trainer sounds like a douchebag. | ||
| That story sucks. | ||
| Hey man! | ||
| Hey man! | ||
| How about that man? | ||
| Hey man, alright let me retell it. | ||
| The trainer warmed him up. | ||
| He stretched him and warmed him up. | ||
| It is definitely important. | ||
| You gotta edit that one a little bit. | ||
| You know what squatting doesn't help with? | ||
| Hunting. | ||
| When you're out there trying to stalk a deer. | ||
| See, I disagree. | ||
| I think all those bodyweight squats I do, that totally helped me. | ||
| I don't hike. | ||
| No, I know. | ||
| I never go hiking. | ||
| We were hiking for fucking hours. | ||
| I was like, there's a couple points where I was like, whoa, I'm breathing really heavy. | ||
| This is really taxing. | ||
| And someone who's in shitty shape and you try to do that Badlands hiking all day, that's not good for you. | ||
| Well, when we had to hoof out all that meat, Yeah. | ||
| It was a small mile. | ||
| It was only a mile. | ||
| I thought it was heavy and I was like, I was concentrating. | ||
| Yeah, I think it's a peculiar, it's like a peculiar kind of, um, in shape. | ||
| Just like walking around on uneven ground. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You know, I remember when I, like I grew up in Michigan and you couldn't, you couldn't find a good, you couldn't find anywhere you could, where you needed to walk. | ||
| You know, like a, like a mile walk would be a big walk there. | ||
| And, um, We were, you know, we all consider ourselves, like, pretty tough about that kind of stuff, like hunting in Michigan and trapping and stuff. | ||
| When I moved out west and first started hunting elk, we would get where, like, we'd hike in, we might hike in, like, eight or nine miles somewhere to hunt, and then hunt a couple days and come back out. | ||
| And then we'd, like, get in the truck and drive to a gas station, you know, and you go in to get, like, a fountain pop. | ||
| A fountain pop. | ||
| Yeah, like you'd go to... | ||
| That's soda for you people who are not living in the 50s. | ||
| But I remember like getting... | ||
|
unidentified
|
A fountain pop. | |
| Okay, a belly washer. | ||
| So, but by that point in time, you'd pull up and open the door and couldn't get out of the vehicle. | ||
| Like, just that 20 minute drive and my legs would just... | ||
| Seize up. | ||
| Like, seize up so bad that it would take days to recover from it. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| And then now, I don't understand, like now... | ||
| It just doesn't happen. | ||
| Even if I didn't go and do that for a year, maybe not a year, if I didn't go do that for six months or something, I feel like I would just be fine. | ||
| Something goes away or comes or breaks or heals or something from just those long, arduous hikes. | ||
| Yeah, the human body is incredibly adaptable. | ||
| I mean, there's things that people do if you go to a martial arts school and watch guys who have been doing jujitsu their whole lives and watch how you can move your body around, how you can manipulate your body. | ||
| The only way you can do that is if you just do it for years and years and years and years. | ||
| You're hiking up those crazy slippery slopes. | ||
| All those places we hiked up were really slippery. | ||
| It takes a specific kind of balance and leg endurance when you're moving through muck and stuff. | ||
| That's a skill. | ||
| You're just really good at it. | ||
| You were barely getting tired. | ||
| It was crazy. | ||
| I was really impressed. | ||
| I was like, this guy's barely breathing heavy. | ||
| We get to the top and he's glassing and I'm going... | ||
| He's like barely breathing. | ||
| But at the same time, keep in mind, I live in fear of catching a direct hit from my two-year-old. | ||
| He gets big time outs for that, and I'm kind of covering my face. | ||
| I can't take a hit from him. | ||
| He's 35 pounds. | ||
| When I take one of his Matchbox cars and he deals me a blow to the cheek or something like that, it puts me out. | ||
| That's funny. | ||
| Kids can fucking, they can hit you hard. | ||
| They don't pull. | ||
| No, man. | ||
| My daughter decided to take her heel into me. | ||
| She went, yeah! | ||
| She jumped on me. | ||
| I was lying in bed. | ||
| She jumped on me and decided to ride me and she took her heel and went, get that in my rib. | ||
| And I went, hey! | ||
| It was crazy. | ||
| I was like, how'd you get that much power out of that heel strike? | ||
| Do you teach them martial arts yet? | ||
| Not yet. | ||
| My son will definitely be learning. | ||
| I train them when they're rolling, the four-year-old and the two-year-old, because they wrestle around together naturally. | ||
| So I train them positions, and I was like, this is not where you want to stay. | ||
| If you're in this position, what do you want to do? | ||
| You want to pass the guard. | ||
| I think it's important. | ||
| You should teach somebody how to do that. | ||
| My wife today, honestly, two hours ago my wife sent me a message on my phone asking if I thought that our little boy would like karate classes. | ||
| It's really good. | ||
| I've never done anything like that. | ||
| Well, you did a lot of hunting, though, and a lot of physical things. | ||
| I think men need a lot of physical things. | ||
| I think the idea that it's natural for a man to have no explosive release physically for the rest of his life and just sit in a cubicle and just go through life with shiny shoes on, with a fucking tie on. | ||
| Your body's going to break. | ||
| That's a totally unnatural thing you're asking of it. | ||
| And if you don't have some sort of physical release, or at least understand how to manage it. | ||
| You've got to understand how to manage it. | ||
| Managing it is super important. | ||
| Well, it also, hormonally, for a man, doing exercise like that, hormonally, it changes you hormonally. | ||
| When you don't exercise, you lose it, man. | ||
| You lose it. | ||
| Oh, no question. | ||
| No question. | ||
| It's way healthier to... | ||
| Actually, lifting heavy is a good thing, too. | ||
| Yeah, but we're talking about for little kids. | ||
| For little kids, learning how to do difficult things early on, it's so important. | ||
| Well, hand-eye coordination. | ||
| Think how normal it is for you to sleep somewhere that's fucking cold as shit with a sleeping bag and like, all right, well, this is just what we're doing. | ||
| Here we are. | ||
| You and Mo curled up together in that van, raising your asses off. | ||
| For an average person, that's like some... | ||
| You know, walking dead type shit. | ||
| That scenario never comes up. | ||
| And if it did, they would fall apart. | ||
| They wouldn't be able to deal with it. | ||
| They'd be complaining and whining. | ||
| I mean, how many people would complain and whine? | ||
| Well, Steve, shed some light on this, because I've read accounts of where the settlers, when they would move west and they'd come in contact with Native Americans, it'd be a bitterly cold winter or something. | ||
| And they would see like Native Americans and children not dressed warmly. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Like dressed in like, you know, or not warmly compared to Western. | ||
| So they'd be like, you know, 10 degrees out or something and they'd be in, you know, two skins but not nearly as bundled up as you would expect them to be. | ||
| Yeah, I think the people acclimate to that kind of stuff. | ||
| And you see your own minor version of it, just the way you might behave throughout the winter. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Do you know what I mean? | ||
| You get just generally accustomed to it throughout the year. | ||
| And then you see mild variations where people who might grow up at northern latitudes, move down south, they come back home and can't hack the cold. | ||
| Yeah, I wonder what that is. | ||
| Maybe your body naturally starts preparing for that or heating up. | ||
| Something shifts. | ||
| Even then, if you look at cultures like Inuit cultures, just in that small amount of time, relatively, that's not a very ancient people or very ancient culture. | ||
| They're fairly new arrivals in the Arctic, but they already demonstrate Physical differences and physical adaptations... | ||
| Their hands and feet don't get cold, right? | ||
| ...that would help them adapt to the cold, like how much stuff you spread out, like how much blood you send to your extremities and how well you can shut that off and control it. | ||
| Another thing is... | ||
| There's this thing that's called the Bergman Principle. | ||
| It's a principle in wildlife physiology. | ||
| And the Bergman Principle holds that... | ||
| Like, if you have a species, okay, let's take white-tailed deer... | ||
| In the southern extreme of that species range, the animals are going to be much smaller than in the northern extreme. | ||
| So if you look at white-tailed deer from Alberta, there's just monsters up there. | ||
| You hear these guys that get like 280 pound deer or whatever. | ||
| Down in the southern extreme of the range, they might weigh 90 pounds. | ||
| And what they find is that a bigger... | ||
| Like, generally, a bigger animal has less surface area. | ||
| So that bigger animal is better able to retain body heat. | ||
| And a smaller animal... | ||
| In a mammal shape, a smaller animal has greater surface area and is thus better able to shed heat. | ||
| So it comes down to heat shedding and heat retention. | ||
| And when you look at, like, human cultures... | ||
| Wait, so a smaller animal... | ||
| Say again? | ||
| Like, a bigger animal... | ||
| Let's say you have exactly the same shaped dogs, but one of those dogs is 200 pounds and one of those dogs is 50 pounds. | ||
| The larger dog has less surface area per unit of mass. | ||
| And the smaller dog has greater surface area per unit of mass. | ||
| And so that's a way in which animals help, you know, shedding heat and keeping it. | ||
| Another thing you see in species, like now that we look at the woolly mammoth, the woolly mammoth had very small ears. | ||
| You know, we think of elephants that have, like, elephantine giant ears. | ||
| The woolly mammoth had very small ears. | ||
| It was an arctic and subarctic inhabitant. | ||
| Then you look at the African element near equatorial zones, big ears. | ||
| So it's like the ability to shed heat, to send a bunch of blood into that big ear and drop that heat off. | ||
| Oh, I see. | ||
| And what I'm saying is, not just the body size thing, but just attributes, long legs, things that long legs would help you shed heat, squat legs help you retain heat. | ||
| So when you look at human cultures, like human cultures from equatorial areas and human cultures from Arctic and sub-Arctic areas, will in some way demonstrate that same tendency of... | ||
| Or, you know, that same physiology of being squat and compact, being able to handle cold. | ||
| So I think that, you know, it doesn't take that long for, I mean, whatever your feelings are about, like, you know, when I talk about evolution, it's always just, like, tangled up, you know, people think you're making, like, some grandiose comment about religion or the Bible, but I'm just talking about, like, that things are different, you know? | ||
| Things look different where they come from. | ||
| And it doesn't, and I think that it goes pretty quick, In species and humans and stuff, making, you know, like, acquiring adaptations that help them deal with climates, you know? | ||
| And you talk about guys going out west. | ||
| I mean, like, settlers going out west. | ||
| Who's going to wind up thriving? | ||
| The guy that can hack the cold. | ||
| The guy that can sleep out, you know? | ||
| But I think, like, on an individual level, I think so much of it comes down to... | ||
| Getting comfortable with discomfort. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And that was something I learned over a long time of hunting in the West and hunting Alaska. | ||
| It was just kind of like the mental attribute of getting comfortable with discomfort. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, they said that the SEAL teams, they tried to figure out what prototype would do well in the stocky guy or whatever. | ||
| A lot of guys are stockier. | ||
| A lot of guys were wrestlers. | ||
| There are three sports they recruit from, believe it or not, lacrosse, swimming, wrestling, and one other football. | ||
| But they couldn't actually, they've never been able to really pinpoint who makes it and why. | ||
| And they certainly can't even do it physically. | ||
| Like some guys just defy the odds and they shouldn't do it, but they do. | ||
| So there's no like, well that guy has this, these six qualities, he's definitely going to make it through buds. | ||
| No. | ||
| It's just a very difficult thing to pinpoint. | ||
| While we've been talking, Cam just walked in. | ||
| We only have one extra mic here, so you guys are going to have to get close to each other and talk. | ||
| Are you Steve's friend? | ||
| You guys know each other? | ||
|
unidentified
|
We know each other a little bit. | |
| I've gone on Cam's show a number of times. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, Steve and I are both on Sportsman Channel. | |
| I do Cam and Company, which is 5 o'clock Eastern, Monday through Friday. | ||
| Big fan of Steve's, and we've talked about... | ||
| Oh, I was confused. | ||
| I thought you guys were good buddies, and you were traveling together. | ||
| You're not traveling together. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Not traveling together. | |
| Oh, I gotta... | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| My information sucks. | ||
| I don't know where I'm getting a wire from. | ||
| So you're here to promote? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Here to promote your appearance on Meat Eater and talk about the MMA week that we're developing for Cam and Company coming up last week in April. | |
| Having Steven on and hopefully having you on, Randy Couture is going to be joining us. | ||
| We're going to talk about, you know, I think a lot of the similarities in the crossover between the MMA world and the world of hunting. | ||
| You know, you talk about what attributes it takes to, you know, make it as a Navy SEAL and you talk about what attributes it takes to make it as a hunter. | ||
| You know, I think that there's all kinds of commonalities there when we talk about What it means to actually be better than what we are and to grow ourselves, whether it's putting yourself in that state of discomfort where a lot of people bug out. | ||
| I mean, they don't want to do that anymore. | ||
| We live in a world in which our entire existence is based on how comfortable can we be. | ||
| But again, you don't become better unless you're pushing yourself, unless you're breaking out of that comfort zone. | ||
| Yeah, it's a sad thing to see a whole generation of kids growing up that don't experience that as young men. | ||
| They don't have difficult tasks to perform. | ||
| I think that's a very critical aspect of your behavior and your character and growing your character. | ||
| You've got to fail. | ||
| You've got to be pushed. | ||
| You've got to get to a situation where you pass your limits or you surprise yourself with new limits and you change your own definition of yourself. | ||
| But if you don't test yourself, if you don't get into bad positions, you're always going to have that weird insecurity about you. | ||
| Like that weird insecurity that guys have that have never been in any kind of conflict ever and you don't know how they would react. | ||
| There are certain people I know exactly how they would react if the shit hits the fan. | ||
| But those other people are like, oh, you squirrely bitch, you might fall apart on me. | ||
| And I think that, like you always say too, if you're trying to be really good at anything, you can find all that discomfort and all those plateaus and everything just in trying to get great at the guitar or the drums or whatever it is. | ||
| There's a certain amount of humility and an understanding of what's really going on that you develop when you sort of make any strides in any really difficult thing, whether it's playing chess, whether it's writing, whatever it is. | ||
| It's a matter of doing something difficult and testing your boundaries. | ||
| I think at a time all that came more naturally. | ||
| If you just look at the way people's lives used to be structured, you know, and even just, you know, not even just a hundred years ago or so, it wasn't like we had to manufacture opportunities for stress. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Do you know what I mean? | ||
| It was just like you had things you had to do, like you had to clear land or people would actually have children because they needed the additional, they didn't look at children as being a deficit. | ||
| They looked at children as being an addition of resources. | ||
| Like, I'll have kids because they'll help me do more work. | ||
| Not that I'll have kids so that I can pump money into them and pump resources into them. | ||
| I'll derive from them. | ||
| And now I find... | ||
| I certainly don't live that way. | ||
| Now I find that I manufacture... | ||
| I try to, in small dosages, manufacture that feeling for my kid to... | ||
| Give him this, he doesn't see it as artificial, but give him this artificial sense of him having to have output. | ||
| You know, that I'm doing something, and maybe I'm doing something completely unnecessary. | ||
| Like, he wants to make a birdhouse, so we're going to make a birdhouse. | ||
| But at a point, it becomes just, like, arduous. | ||
| You know, there's a part where the fun dies, and now we just got to get it finished, you know? | ||
| And to make it, and to turn it into, like, no, we're doing this, we're doing this, we're doing this. | ||
| And it's like, and I don't care if it's enjoyable to him anymore. | ||
| And he's so little, this is all just, like, experiment now. | ||
| Right. | ||
| But just trying to, like, create that sense of that you have to now, in some way, do something you don't want to do. | ||
|
unidentified
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Yes. | |
| That it is productive as I define it. | ||
| That's a part of love life practice, right? | ||
| It's a part of that, you know, you start getting good at something and just, you know, if you're trying to be a good wrestler or whatever, there are days you walk in, you're like, I don't want to wrestle. | ||
| I don't want to do any of this. | ||
| I don't even care about this anymore. | ||
| It's all a bore. | ||
| I don't like that guy. | ||
| I don't like that guy. | ||
| I don't like any of this. | ||
| And it's like getting into a cold bath until your skin gets acclimated, you know? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| That's a huge part. | ||
| Isn't that a really interesting thing, the way they put it? | ||
| Get comfortable with discomfort. | ||
| I don't think you can get good at anything unless you get comfortable with discomfort. | ||
| Well, that's one of the things about wrestlers that separates them from, in my opinion, almost every other athlete. | ||
| Wrestlers go through such horrendous stress throughout high school and college. | ||
| Suck and weight. | ||
| Between sucking weight and the training, wrestling is the most brutal fucking training you can do. | ||
| And then you're doing strength and conditioning, hill sprints, whatever kind of crazy weightlifting program they have you on. | ||
| You are broken down all day, falling asleep in class, you're dehydrated, you're sucking weight, you're eating fucking turkey breast and lettuce with lemon juice on it. | ||
| You're essentially starving while you're going to war. | ||
| Spartan lifestyle. | ||
| And these guys, they developed this unbelievable ability to just grind through shit. | ||
| And they break a lot of fighters just with their sheer will because of that. | ||
| The mentality that comes with being a successful wrestler. | ||
| Well, tomorrow I'm having Ronda Rousey on the show. | ||
| Brian Callenshow, everybody. | ||
| Sorry to push my podcast. | ||
| Thank God you changed the name of that stupid thing. | ||
| From Man Thoughts? | ||
| A lot of people want Man Thoughts back. | ||
| It used to be called Man Thoughts, and then Joe was like, come on, dude, just have it the Brian Callenshow. | ||
| I was like, all right, I'm changing it back to the Brian Callenshow, everybody. | ||
| Man Thoughts. | ||
| Because it's not, you know, people look for the Brian Callenshow podcast. | ||
| They're not going to Google Man Thoughts. | ||
| Right, exactly. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| It's kind of silly. | ||
| There's a little disconnect there with people finding it. | ||
| I know. | ||
| It was an idea to label. | ||
| I can't do anything. | ||
| I'm so bad at labeling. | ||
| Who's the person? | ||
| Ronda Rousey. | ||
| Ronda Rousey is a UFC champion. | ||
| The point I'm making is that I think part of what makes her so great is she was an Olympian in judo, which is so difficult. | ||
| It's the same kind of training. | ||
| Yeah, brutal. | ||
| And you get into the octagon with Ronda Rousey, man. | ||
| She's been through the muck. | ||
| And that's what I'm going to talk to her about. | ||
| She's an extreme winner, and I want to talk to her about how... | ||
| What her mindset is, how she keeps that going, how she deals with the pressure, how she deals with all of that. | ||
| Her mother developed her. | ||
| Her mother's a judo champion as well. | ||
| Her mother just taught her to be a total badass. | ||
| It's amazing. | ||
| What she said in an interview, Rhonda said, and I'm going to talk about this, is when something bad happens to her, she immediately says, wow. | ||
| I wonder what I'm going to get out of this. | ||
| This sucks right now, but I wonder what good is going to come out of this because something good, I'm going to react in a good way. | ||
| My reaction is going to create something positive in this atmosphere. | ||
| That's a great way of looking at any kind of adversity. | ||
| Sure, until you get kicked in the head. | ||
| Well, that's true. | ||
| And then you go, okay. | ||
| Ain't that the truth, right? | ||
| That's the ultimate equalizer. | ||
| Boo Mancini used to say, for some of you younger listeners, he was a world champion boxer, Ray Mancini, and he said, my father always said, you're a tough guy, till you're not. | ||
| Bottom line. | ||
| You're a tough guy until you're not. | ||
| Somebody hits you in the face. | ||
| You're not a tough guy anymore. | ||
|
unidentified
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You're a tough guy until you're not. | |
| Doesn't it suck to get to an age where your references don't work anymore? | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| Back when Chico and the man. | ||
| My wife's like, how old are you? | ||
| I don't know, does it seem that? | ||
| I'll make some things like Mary Lou Retton, which in my mind was the only athlete I knew about because she was on Special K-Box. | ||
| I'll be like, yeah, jumping around. | ||
| By the way, Mary Lou Retton is... | ||
| How about when Bruce Jenner used to be the Wheaties guy, not some freak on a fucking reality show? | ||
| How about that? | ||
| How about when Bruce Jenner had a man nose? | ||
| How about when Bruce Jenner was a man? | ||
| What's going on? | ||
| When you become like this guy who's on this reality show and all your daughters are just... | ||
| With that little upturned nose. | ||
| ...all in the news and everyone's mad. | ||
| They're all crazy. | ||
| They're completely crazy. | ||
| Yeah, and he used to be a champion. | ||
| He used to be an Olympic... | ||
| Was he a decathlon? | ||
| Yeah, he was one of the best in the world. | ||
| He was a gold medal and handsome and then decides he's going to go and get his nose done. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Have you ever played the game where you try to flash forward 20 years into the future and find out, you know, like think, okay, what celebrity that I know now who's normal is going to be that fucked up 20 years from now? | |
| Nah, it's too easy to make fun of the ones that are fucked up right now. | ||
| I'm not really into fucking the stock market of celebrity doucheness. | ||
| I'm looking for them to be fucked up right away. | ||
| I mean, there's always something. | ||
| But there's some that you picture, like if someone just rubs you the wrong way for whatever reason, it's fun to fantasize turns that could happen. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Well, what's really fun is when you don't like one and it actually happens and you get to watch. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You can watch them fucking skid and hit the rocks. | ||
| As you get older, you get really good at figuring out. | ||
| You look at some celebrities and you go, oh, there's a lot of flash and noise there, but you're not drawing for much, brother. | ||
| You're working with one bag of tricks and that's getting empty. | ||
| I can watch it. | ||
| And you're like, you've got to come up with something. | ||
| But a lot of times you see that. | ||
| It's a very disappointing thing when you realize that there's all these really douchey people that on camera, and they have this sort of artificial act that they put on, and then they'll do films where they're really good at pretending to be someone else, so they do that. | ||
| But you get to meet them, and you see them, and you're like, this guy's a douchebag, like a straight A, grade A douchebag, and you're a movie star. | ||
| And a bore, and a bore, yeah. | ||
| A boring, crazy psychopath who's just really... | ||
| Who's all about themselves. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Pathologically self-involved. | ||
| I know a movie star like that. | ||
| It's just, you know, and you grow up watching him and I got to know him and I was like, you are an absolute cuckoo bird. | ||
| You are all about yourself. | ||
| Never ask me a question about my, never ask me one question about myself. | ||
| Not one question. | ||
| Not even how you're doing. | ||
| Not a question. | ||
| No interest. | ||
| It's all about him. | ||
| He's truly the center of his own universe. | ||
| There's guys like that. | ||
| I had a buddy that I had to cut off because I couldn't never just have a, hey, what's going on, man? | ||
| I couldn't have that. | ||
| I couldn't say that. | ||
| No, competition. | ||
| No, no, no, no. | ||
| Because when you would say, hey, what's going on, man, he would just go into his career. | ||
| I know. | ||
| I mean, it was like a fucking five-minute diatribe on how well this audition went, and he's pretty sure he's going to be back for a second pass at that. | ||
| And I think once I can get in front of producers, I can show them what I can really do. | ||
| I know who you're talking about, too. | ||
| Hey, can I interrupt you long enough just to, Brian, I mean, how's your family? | ||
| LAUGHTER Dude, I can't believe... | ||
| Thank you for not being so involved, Steve. | ||
| He's off of that list. | ||
| He wants to make sure he's off of that list. | ||
| How's your family? | ||
| Steve, you will never be on that list. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You can do your... | ||
| Well, we were talking, Cam, before you got here, we were talking about how it seems like, you know, Brian and Steve and I are, because we went on this crazy trip together, because we went to Montana, we have this weird blood brotherhood ship thing going on. | ||
| It certainly felt that way when I was watching the episodes. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I was like, there's Mo! | ||
|
unidentified
|
There's Dan Doddy! | |
| I miss those guys. | ||
|
unidentified
|
So true. | |
| And Ryan, Ryan. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Dude, for five days, we had a great fucking time with no TV, no cell phone. | ||
| We needed less sleep, right? | ||
| Remember that? | ||
| I mean, we slept like rocks. | ||
| We slept when the lights went out. | ||
| Basically, we ate, slept. | ||
| But getting up, it didn't seem that hard. | ||
| It was really fun. | ||
| It was probably because we were going to bed at 8 and waking up at 6. So I did get about 14 hours of sleep at night. | ||
| I didn't even need a nap! | ||
| I'm rugged! | ||
| It was hard to figure out how to sleep at first, but I realized eventually that the softest way to do it is to keep your, not just your sleeping bag, but your jacket on as well. | ||
| I kept all my clothes on, my jacket, my sleeping bag, and the down jacket and the sleeping bag. | ||
| I was like, this is just enough. | ||
| Let me tell you something. | ||
| The next time we go hunting, I'm bringing a Sherpa, and guess what he's going to carry? | ||
| A big fucking mattress on his back. | ||
| And a portable heater. | ||
| And fuck you guys, by the way. | ||
| A portable heater? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| I'm going to have a portable heater, and I want a fucking mattress with a big pillow. | ||
| Remember we passed that one kill? | ||
| You'll lose something, though, man. | ||
| Whatever. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really? | |
| Oh, will I? Good. | ||
| Oh, shucks. | ||
| What did we just talk about? | ||
| Oh, sorry. | ||
| Sorry, guys. | ||
| What did we just say about going through difficult things? | ||
| There's a famous quote. | ||
| I can't remember who said it. | ||
| You don't really know a man until you hunted with him. | ||
| Forget that because I don't know the guy. | ||
| I don't know what he said or who said it, which really destroys my point. | ||
| But a broader thing I was going to say is that there's like a... | ||
| I was talking one time with an older friend of mine. | ||
| He was talking about being at his fishing camp. | ||
| And he was trying to describe why he liked being at his fishing camp with his buddies. | ||
| And they always fish halibut in Alaska. | ||
| And he's like, everyone's just so, so... | ||
| You know and it wound up being like that he just kind of appreciated that like hanging out with people who Like, have the ability just to take care of things. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Like, to do things. | ||
| And he was saying, like, you've got to wait in line if you want to wash a dish. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Mm-hmm. | |
| You know, with this crew of people he's out with. | ||
| And I think that in a way, and I'm not saying this is exclusive to hunting. | ||
| I mean, there's many things. | ||
| But it's like going on a trip, you know? | ||
| Going on a trip with people where things aren't so great all the time. | ||
| Like, there's elements of being cold. | ||
| There's elements of having not slept enough. | ||
| But it's kind of having this feeling of... | ||
| Everything's going to be okay. | ||
| These guys are great people to be with, and they're just really competent people. | ||
| And right now we're doing this little crew show on the media that was just on, the one that's coming up, about the guys I work with. | ||
| And when I watch it, I kind of see that, where I just feel so comfortable being around people that I've spent a lot of time out hunting with. | ||
| And again, I think that sports teams feel something similar. | ||
| You know, I think there's... | ||
| The military is that way. | ||
| Yeah, like guys that serve together in the military. | ||
| But it's just kind of a way of... | ||
| Being away from things and sort of relying on other structures. | ||
| Relying on other things and having assumptions about people holding their weight. | ||
| If you complain, make it funny. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's right. | |
| That's right. | ||
| That's funny. | ||
| I spent 11 days in Afghanistan doing a USO tour and one of the things I came away with was I realized, I went, you know, I've been in LA for a long time where I'm the center of my own universe and everybody around me is always about them. | ||
| And one of the things I found very refreshing about being in a war zone, if there is such a thing as being refreshing, was that when you're in the military, you're a Marine, you're an Army guy, you come last. | ||
| Those guys put themselves last and everybody around them comes first. | ||
| So when you get off a bus and you're unloading bags, there's always a line of people unloading everybody else's bags. | ||
| Everybody's looking out for the other guy next to them. | ||
| And that's ethos. | ||
| That is credo in the military that's drummed into you. | ||
| I gotta say that having come from LA, which was the exact opposite of being thrown into that experience, was very, very kind of... | ||
| It was really... | ||
| I didn't expect it. | ||
| This is one of the most ridiculous places to live in the world. | ||
| It is. | ||
| If you want to find, like, actual real humans to talk to. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Authenticity. | |
| Yeah, real, authentic. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You can't find a lot of authenticity in Los Angeles. | |
| Men and women. | ||
| It's such a brutal grind to try to find people that are your friends that you can talk to. | ||
| I've cultivated a group over the years, and one of the things about doing your show is that I knew that if I was going to do it, and I brought this motherfucker around, I'm like, we'll change the whole tone of the show. | ||
| This show is just going to be a five-day silly fest. | ||
| I'm like, this is the perfect thing to do. | ||
| And also I knew that Brian Cowan holds up. | ||
| I knew no matter what happened. | ||
| Fucking asteroids could be coming and we'd be looking at each other. | ||
| Well, pal, it's been a good time, but I don't see us surviving that fucking thing. | ||
| I'm always ready to go out with a bang. | ||
| I will stand by your side no matter what. | ||
| That's how I think of friendship. | ||
| He's my four in the morning I got a body to get rid of guy. | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| It's true. | ||
| If I had a guy that I had to call up and go, dude, meet me. | ||
| I would take a risk for you. | ||
| Meet me in your parking lot. | ||
| No, I take that very seriously. | ||
| My real friends, I always say, I'll take a risk for you. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That hurts my feelings, Joe. | |
| That hurts my feelings. | ||
| You too, sweetie. | ||
| But he can carry more. | ||
| He can carry your body more. | ||
| You might get uncomfortable walking through the desert. | ||
| I also got holes. | ||
| I got holes in stores of life. | ||
| Brian would have to stop for cigarette breaks. | ||
| I'd fuck the evidence away. | ||
| But you're not just looking for someone who'd be cool with the fact that you had a body. | ||
| Right. | ||
| It'd be someone who'd be helpful in getting... | ||
| Oh yeah, know exactly how to get rid of it. | ||
| You gotta go into mission mode. | ||
| You gotta get rid of that fucking body because that's the way it is. | ||
| You don't want it to become a fossil either. | ||
| It's like Jimmy Burke's friend who comes home, his girlfriend is having a fight with her boyfriend. | ||
| Our boyfriend is hitting his daughter. | ||
| He comes home and his daughter's in a fight with her boyfriend in the backyard and the boyfriend starts hitting her. | ||
| He comes out and he's a construction worker. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Can you back up one step? | |
| No, not that. | ||
| I don't understand the story. | ||
| Okay, so the story is... | ||
| So my buddy, my buddy, my buddy... | ||
| Your buddy? | ||
| Is it your buddy? | ||
| My buddy grows up with a guy named... | ||
| Who gives a fuck what his name is? | ||
| What happened? | ||
| Comes home. | ||
| His daughter is in the backyard with a boyfriend and they're fighting. | ||
| They're having a fight. | ||
| The boyfriend starts hitting his daughter. | ||
| Right. | ||
| He goes out in the backyard and tries to break it up. | ||
| The boyfriend, I guess, gets smart with him. | ||
| He kills the boyfriend with his bare hands. | ||
| He fucking kills him. | ||
| Whoa. | ||
| He punches him to death. | ||
| Now, he says to his daughter, go inside, and he's got to get rid of the body. | ||
| So he calls his buddy. | ||
| Wait a minute. | ||
| Should you be telling this story? | ||
| Yeah, it's fine. | ||
| It's fine. | ||
| Are people in jail? | ||
| Yeah, they're in jail. | ||
| And this was a long time ago. | ||
| So he calls his huge friend Bozo. | ||
| Bozo was a knuckle breaker who, his claim to fame was he had the longest tongue on the planet. | ||
| He would stick his tongue out and you'd go, oh Jesus Christ, like that. | ||
| He'd scare people with his fucking tongue that was the size of a cow's. | ||
| Anyway, Bozo's a giant man. | ||
| Bozo shows up. | ||
| Bozo goes, I know what we're going to do. | ||
| Calm down. | ||
| He goes, what? | ||
| He goes, I'll be right back. | ||
| Bozo goes and gets a dolly. | ||
| He takes the dolly. | ||
| He ties the guy to the dolly. | ||
| They fucking, in the middle of the night, they take this guy, they dolly him to a gas station round the corner. | ||
| And they leave him behind the gas station. | ||
| Oops, you dropped something. | ||
| Then they come running back like, he he he, we did it. | ||
| Good job, buddy. | ||
| Blood brothers. | ||
| I helped you get rid of a body. | ||
| Well, here's what they didn't think, because they were a little drunk to calm down. | ||
| The guy's hand had dragged along the ground. | ||
| So when the cops showed up, they brought the dogs. | ||
| And the dogs went, oh, well, let's just follow where the dogs go. | ||
| And the dogs go, and they just went around the corner and found themselves a little house and started barking. | ||
| Cops were like, knock, knock, knock. | ||
| Hey, you guys dolly a body around the fucking thing? | ||
| Ah, sorry, we did it! | ||
| You're going to jail and so are fucking you, pal. | ||
| And they did some time. | ||
| They didn't do 25 to life. | ||
| They did some fucking, I don't know. | ||
| So your point is, you don't want any old dude getting rid of a body. | ||
| You gotta have a plan! | ||
| You want someone to start through this shit. | ||
| Beforehand! | ||
| Yeah, you gotta think through this shit. | ||
| You gotta rehearse this shit. | ||
| You gotta get his body out before it stinks. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's important. | ||
| Lentac blenders, guys. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, yeah, yeah. | |
| One blender at a time. | ||
| Well, there was that guy that fed the body through, I guess, he had a hog farm and fed the body first through a tree shredder and shot all of it into the hog thing and the hogs ate it, but they still ended up catching the guy. | ||
| Still ending up catching. | ||
| You know, this reminds me of that link, like Joe said, you sent me a link recently of like the great... | ||
| Cannibals of the Wild West. | ||
| The great cannibals of the West. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Which is fascinating. | ||
| Wild shit, isn't it? | ||
| What's that? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Like the Donner Party? | |
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, like similar. | ||
| Similar, but one of them was a guy who, his wife got killed by the Cherokees, so he went on a rampage and just killed a bunch of Indians and ate their liver, and they called him Liver Eating Johnson. | ||
| Liver Eating Johnson. | ||
| And he just, he would kill guys and eat their liver. | ||
| Now that was the Sidney Pollack movie. | ||
| That's a serial killer who'd been fantasizing about that his whole life. | ||
| He's like, they killed my wife before I could eat her liver. | ||
| He later became the sheriff. | ||
| Like, he later became the sheriff of Red Lodge. | ||
| Is it Red Lodge? | ||
| Something. | ||
| He was, yeah. | ||
| I think he was the sheriff in Red Lodge. | ||
| And then... | ||
| Sidney Pollack made that movie, the great movie, Jeremiah Johnson. | ||
| And Jeremiah Johnson was based loosely off of the legend of Liver Eating Johnson. | ||
| And it was fun about Liver Eating Johnson. | ||
| Liver Eating Johnson used to cut firewood. | ||
| For the boats on the Missouri brakes. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Where we did our float. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Holy shit. | |
| Which brings this whole deal way full circle. | ||
| In a weird way. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Johnson also had an 8 inch tongue. | |
| I don't know how that works. | ||
| Wait a minute! | ||
| Your stories, man, about the Old West were so great. | ||
| You know so many cool fucking stories. | ||
| Like Brian, when we got back, when we were on the boat, and you were like, oh my god, the last day of being on the water was so fucking cold. | ||
| I didn't even notice, because Steve kept telling me all these cool-ass fucking Indian stories. | ||
| You know what's funny about that? | ||
| How this guy got away, this guy hid in a beaver's den, and this guy, they told him you could run naked, you can try to get away if you can run away. | ||
| I was so frozen. | ||
| I saw you, and it was so cold that you had, like, there were icicles on your beard, and you were just smiling the whole time. | ||
| I was like, how is he not cold right now? | ||
| So you did your job. | ||
| You distracted him. | ||
| I was enjoying myself, man. | ||
| I never bothered. | ||
| I mean, knowing that the cold was only like a five-day thing. | ||
| I was like, as long as it's only a five-day thing. | ||
| And when we were walking around in the day, it wasn't bad. | ||
| As long as you have gloves on, I mean, if you're done upright, if you're wearing the right shit, it's not bad. | ||
| It's not that big a deal. | ||
| It's like a paradox almost where... | ||
| When you get uncomfortable and cold like that, some party wants you to stand there. | ||
| But the only time you're actually comfortable is when you're out screwing around. | ||
| You're comfortable as soon as you start moving around. | ||
| But there's something in the minute you stop, something inhabits you and makes you want to just stand there and be cold. | ||
| And it's like the guys that are good about it are the guys that you look and instead of hanging around talking, they're just walking up and down a little hill. | ||
| And they're totally fine. | ||
| Well, it's weird how we got sweaty, even though it's like nine degrees out. | ||
| A lot of times we're fucking sweaty, moving around a lot. | ||
| That's why cotton kills, right? | ||
| You don't want to get sweat. | ||
| You've got to have wool. | ||
| The opposite of that. | ||
| Are you familiar with paradoxical? | ||
| You ever hear of paradoxical undressing? | ||
| No. | ||
| It's like when people find hypothermia. | ||
| Victims of hypothermia, they'll often shed their clothes, but in erratic ways. | ||
| Taking jewelry off. | ||
| Like taking one sock off. | ||
| But there's this thing that happens where you spend, like your body, when you start getting cold, your body spends a lot of energy. | ||
| It constricts certain blood vessels and stops the flow of blood out to your extremities, like to the tip of your nose. | ||
| You know when you get cold, the tip of your nose will get kind of numb and whitish. | ||
| Your fingers get that way. | ||
| Like your body's working really hard to stave off the heat loss, so it doesn't want to send as much blood out to places that lose blood easily. | ||
| But as you tire and you start to peter out, that gives way. | ||
| Your body can't expend the energy necessary to do that. | ||
| And it opens those up. | ||
| And it's a rush of heat. | ||
| So it's like your fingers have gotten very cold. | ||
| Your limbs have gotten very cold. | ||
| Your face has gotten very cold. | ||
| And all of a sudden your body's like, I can't do it anymore. | ||
| And all that hot blood rushes out of those things and people apparently get this feeling of intense heat. | ||
| Right before they go. | ||
| Yeah, and so they'll find someone, and it's always like, you know, he's got some clothes over here, and his wedding ring's laying over that way, and you know. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fuck. | |
| Wedding rings burn. | ||
| You know what, man? | ||
| I was down fishing in Florida, and I got bit up by black flies real bad, and for the first time since I got married, I took my wedding ring off for a day. | ||
| It felt so good. | ||
| I got like a guilty conscious feeling. | ||
| And I had to put it back on even though it's uncomfortable because I just felt guilty. | ||
| And then I get here and I'm looking through my bag and find my wife's wedding ring in my backpack because like a week ago she didn't know where to put it and I put it in my backpack and I call her and be like, do you even know? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Do you even wonder where your wedding ring is at? | |
| You just hear a bunch of dudes in the background, come back to the hot tub! | ||
| I didn't know we had a hot tub in our house! | ||
| And I'm sitting here like trying to scratch under mine, you know? | ||
| And hers is just in some unknown location to her. | ||
| I left my wedding ring at a spa where I got a massage from a dude. | ||
| So I go. | ||
| I get massages from dudes now. | ||
| I gave up. | ||
| Because girls can't do it hard enough. | ||
| They can't. | ||
| I need deep tissue. | ||
| It's brutal. | ||
| It's painful. | ||
| It doesn't feel good. | ||
| But you've got to have a man doing it. | ||
| Because women, they're not strong enough to do it. | ||
| Some women are. | ||
| They use their elbows really well. | ||
| I have to have a man. | ||
| He has to have a mustache. | ||
| Borderline violent. | ||
| Is that hard to come with a guy though? | ||
| It's not that hard. | ||
| So anyway, I go, and I come back, and she always makes fun of me for getting massaged by dudes, right? | ||
| And then I go, fuck, I left my wedding ring there. | ||
| So I run back, I get the wedding ring, I come back home, and she goes, was it in his ass? | ||
| That's hilarious. | ||
| That's so awesome. | ||
| Oh yeah, it was fucking hilarious. | ||
| By the way, did you actually go to Dick Party in My Mouth and see what that was? | ||
| No, I just made that up. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Go check it out. | |
| Is it real? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, go check it out. | |
| It's hilarious. | ||
| Powerful. | ||
| Dick Party. | ||
| We were talking about who is domain name privacy, that when you register a domain, you can also register it anonymously, so people don't know who owns dickpartyinmymouth.com. | ||
| Yeah, they're going to be surprised though. | ||
| Why was it surprising? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Because it's pretty shocking. | |
| Okay. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I was going to tell you at the beginning. | |
| Pretty shocking? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| I would think with the URL, I mean, like, how shocking would it be? | ||
| What's your next show? | ||
| It's all about the Constitution. | ||
| How weird is this? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, it is? | |
| Oh, it's deskwad.tv. | ||
| That's hilarious. | ||
| Did you just transfer it? | ||
| I bought that during the commercial and signed up and everything. | ||
| That's a good move, man. | ||
| That's a smart move. | ||
| How much does something like that cost? | ||
|
unidentified
|
13 bucks. | |
| Because I used to keep on code ROGAN and save 10%. | ||
| Hey, guys. | ||
| Guys, while we're doing this... | ||
| Are you not going to fucking pump up your shows? | ||
| No, I would never do that. | ||
| Are you going to try to tell people where you're going to do comedy? | ||
|
unidentified
|
No! | |
| If you're happening to be in Edmonton April 25th, 26th, 27th, 28th, then come to the comic strip if you're there. | ||
| I mean, but otherwise, don't. | ||
| Steve, you're the only hunting show that I know of that shows on a regular basis. | ||
| You'll show if you get skunked. | ||
| Yeah, we call them skunkers. | ||
| He'll have a whole episode. | ||
| There was an episode where you were going after Awadad, was it? | ||
| That one, you got so close, but it was too dark for you to... | ||
| We've done four skunkers. | ||
| Skunker means you can't get nothing. | ||
| I thought you were talking about getting skunked. | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| Skunked like in zero. | ||
| Yeah, skunk is not getting anything. | ||
| The first time we filmed a skunker, I'll stop using that lingo. | ||
| The first time we filmed an unsuccessful hunt, I was very nervous and I was trying to make the case that we wouldn't air it. | ||
| I don't know why. | ||
| Now it seems stupid, but at the time it seemed like a good idea that we wouldn't air it. | ||
| And then one time we went out, we went to hunt mountain lions with hounds, a friend of mine, and went and spent six days hunting, didn't get anything. | ||
| Came back, went back out again, spent I think seven days hunting, didn't get anything. | ||
| And at that point, we just had to... | ||
| So then we cut that into one. | ||
| And oftentimes it winds up being that... | ||
| Not oftentimes, it's almost like the norm in a way, is people will then pick those out as their favorite shows. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And I think it gets back to that thing I was talking about earlier, like, is that whole thing of, like, courting uncertainty. | ||
| Do you know what I mean? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And, like, things that are challenging and things you won't figure out. | ||
| So I think people like to see that represented. | ||
| Also, I'll say that there's a big rift in... | ||
| In hunting as experienced by the American sportsman, in hunting as seen on hunting television, you know, for me growing up, like, we would start hunting deer with a bow on October 1, and you could hunt deer right up almost to rifle season, which was November 15th, and you had 10 days to hunt with a rifle, then you'd pick your bow back up, and you'd hunt to December 31st. | ||
| And it would be plausible that you would hunt pretty hard through that whole thing and never get a deer. | ||
| It was just a thing that happened, man. | ||
| You would... | ||
| Like, you know, most of you would get a deer, but it would be... | ||
| You might not. | ||
| And there's a lot of guys right now. | ||
| Right now it's turkey season. | ||
| There's a lot of guys around this country facing the prospect that they worked pretty hard and hunted five, six, seven days and they won't get a turkey. | ||
| So I think that people... | ||
| And I think that the assumption is always that people do want to get something and they do. | ||
| And so when they're watching something like... | ||
| When they're watching television, it's a form of escapism. | ||
| And so you want to see people achieve... | ||
| What you wish you achieved. | ||
| You'd want to go and see like, I dream of killing a big buck. | ||
| I want to watch a guy shoot 10 big bucks. | ||
| And that's like one form of entertainment. | ||
| But I think at the same time, people like to see in some way their life reflected back to them. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I think more and more people actually are going the route that you just described. | |
| They want to see that authentic experience, especially because a lot of reality TV now is very unrealistic. | ||
| Hey man, you've got to pull up to that mic. | ||
| It's okay. | ||
| It's so hard for the folks. | ||
|
unidentified
|
But a lot of reality TV right now is not really reality TV. It's scripted. | |
| And so there is something completely unscripted. | ||
| You know it's real if you're watching Meat Eater and you don't get anything. | ||
| You know that's a real show. | ||
| You know that really happened. | ||
| It wasn't like we actually got a bunch of stuff. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's got to be better to just show that sometimes you don't. | |
| Exactly. | ||
| And that's the thing. | ||
| You talk to anybody who's hunted for any amount of time, and a huge part of the hunting is about going out with the guys that you're going hunting with. | ||
| It's about the experience. | ||
| It's not about what you bring home in terms of the game. | ||
| It's what you bring home up here and in here. | ||
| Yeah, I think it's important to show that you don't always get something, because it's a real show. | ||
| Everything you're doing is real, you know, and that's part of the whole thing. | ||
| It's got to be a part of the whole presentation. | ||
| It also lends to the drama. | ||
| Yeah! | ||
| When there are some shows you don't get it, so now... | ||
| That Our Dad Sheep one was a great one, even though you didn't get one. | ||
| It's just like seeing you in the dusk, where it was just getting like, you're like, I need five more minutes. | ||
| Five more minutes of fucking light, and you just couldn't get it. | ||
| You're like, shit! | ||
| You had it. | ||
| You had it right in your sights. | ||
| That's real. | ||
| The mountain lion thing is real. | ||
| And I wanted to talk to you about the mountain lion thing for a couple of years. | ||
| I want to add one thing to what you were saying. | ||
| I do want to talk about the mountain lion thing, because the jaguar thing, too. | ||
| We did have a guy email one time. | ||
| All the emails you get, like people saying, I love that you show some failure. | ||
| We had an email from a guy who was vowing he'll never watch the show again. | ||
| Because he has enough failure in his life and doesn't want to see other people fail. | ||
| That's hilarious. | ||
| That's so awesome. | ||
| I gotta appreciate him. | ||
| That's so honest. | ||
| Yeah, me too. | ||
|
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I gotta appreciate that guy. | |
| That's true. | ||
| I mean, it is a fucking TV show. | ||
| I'll tell you what, I watch Ted Nugent every week. | ||
| God damn it, he never misses. | ||
| That's like Steve Byrne's joke where a girl calls up and she's like, you'll never guess what almost happened. | ||
| He's like, nothing, because it was almost click. | ||
| Ted Nugent shoots, he'll shoot three deer with a bow and arrow in the first five minutes of his show. | ||
| And I'm not bullshitting. | ||
| He shot three deer with bows and arrows. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I mean, it's... | ||
| And my favorite part about it, after he shoots a deer, he goes, can you believe that? | ||
| Can you believe it? | ||
|
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You just fucking did... | |
| You just shot one five minutes ago. | ||
|
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God. | |
| I don't know what kind of limits Ted Nugent has in his backyard. | ||
| I don't know if it's like a land management issue, you know, where you can make the call if you've got a high fence operation in Texas, like how many you decide to take out. | ||
| Yeah, you can do your own management. | ||
| Yeah, that's management. | ||
| He's sitting up there in a fucking tree stand, blasting deer with his bow and arrow. | ||
| Yeah, there's a lot of variability. | ||
| It surprises people that don't have a familiarity with hunting. | ||
| One, it surprises people that there's regulations at all, sometimes. | ||
| I have friends in New York who are pleasantly surprised to hear that wild game is managed. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And I think also, beyond that, it's surprising to people the variations from the different states, their strategy in how they're managing it. | ||
| I think a lot of it comes down to how much the state's public. | ||
| And, like, Texas, they even got rid of school trust lands. | ||
| So, like, it used to be that one in every 36 sections belonged to the state. | ||
| And they could use that to either build schools on or use that land to fund school Construction and they threw mineral leasing or timber rights or whatever. | ||
| And at a point, Texas even scrapped that. | ||
| They even sold that off into private interest. | ||
| So it's like, there really is, like, public trust wildlife isn't as vital in a place like Texas because there's not publicly owned land with publicly owned wildlife on it. | ||
| That's kind of crazy, isn't it? | ||
| You mean everything is probably... | ||
| You guys have humongous national forests. | ||
| There's a lot of public trust land and public trust wildlife in a place like California. | ||
| The government plays a much stronger hand and a much more detail-oriented hand in what's happening in all this stuff, what is our harvest like, than in some states where it kind of tends to be like, well, it's your land, you figure it out. | ||
| Your show on the mountain lions, one of the specific reasons I wanted to bring that up is because the idea of hunting with hogs, or hunting with dogs rather, that wouldn't work at all. | ||
| Two hogs? | ||
| I cannot get a mountain lion with these stupid hogs! | ||
|
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God! | |
| Dude, I'm sorry my iPhone rode hogs. | ||
| I meant you need trained dogs. | ||
| Fuck, man! | ||
| I'm a mountain lion hunter! | ||
| I told people I'm a hunter! | ||
| Now I look like an asshole on Facebook! | ||
|
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I named my hog Fido! | |
| In California, you can't hunt with dogs anymore. | ||
| And some people are concerned about that. | ||
| I've heard people say that they're worried that the mountain lion population is going to get too strong. | ||
| If they do that, especially people who've lost dogs or who know people who've been, you know, fucking bikers and shit that get taken out. | ||
| But California doesn't allow it anymore. | ||
| Coincidentally, I saw a mountain lion. | ||
| Last week in Santa Barbara. | ||
| Did you really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Small mountain lion. | ||
| Wasn't very big. | ||
| I thought it was a coyote at first. | ||
| You know how coyotes, they move kind of stiff? | ||
| This thing had this bounce to it. | ||
| I saw the tail. | ||
| That's a good way of putting it. | ||
| Wasn't a bobcat? | ||
| No. | ||
| It was a tail. | ||
| A long tail. | ||
| It was a mountain lion. | ||
| It was probably 70 pounds. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| I think you're seeing, and I don't mean to say that, I don't want to sound like taking Cheap shots, you know, at California or anything, but you're seeing a pretty, a real erosion of, you know, hunting rights, like a gradual, not even gradual, a pretty steady erosion of hunting rights in California. | ||
| There was a debate, but that's not... | ||
| Because it's easy, because there's a thing that, there's a thing, I mentioned this somewhere in something I wrote, where you can go to Americans, like you can go to the American public and say like, Yes or no? | ||
| Like, do you approve of regulated hunting, okay? | ||
| And you get, the vast majority of Americans, it's something ridiculous, like 74% or 75% of Americans will say like, yes, I approve of hunting. | ||
| But then you start asking them specifics. | ||
| You know, like, well, how about hunting with dogs? | ||
| Right. | ||
|
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Right. | |
| And then those numbers start to go down. | ||
| Right. | ||
| When you start... | ||
| Because you can kind of... | ||
| It's easy to sell people on the idea. | ||
| It's easy to sell people who've never seen a hunting dog or never had experience with a hunting dog, have never laid eyes on a lion. | ||
| It's easy to sell them on the idea that somehow there's no challenge in it. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And so then you can... | ||
| A way to chip away, like a way to chip away at... | ||
| Liberty, like personal liberty and stuff, is just to do one little thing at a time. | ||
| We'll do this, and we'll do that, we'll do this, and we'll do that. | ||
| And so there'll never be a thing like, we'll ban hunting. | ||
| It'll just be that you can't hunt on this kind of land. | ||
| You can't hunt this kind of animal this way. | ||
| Well, in fact, we don't want you hunting that kind of animal at all. | ||
| And you see that in certain places. | ||
| Colorado's had some experience with that. | ||
|
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You got the lead ammo ban in the California Condor range that they're trying to expand statewide, so you couldn't use lead ammo to hunt at all. | |
| Even in places where there are no condors. | ||
| I heard a big debate about this mountain lion issue, and one of the things that the guy from the Fish and Game Wildlife Service said is, what you guys don't realize is if you're actually a preservationist, the majority of money That we collect to preserve the land you like to hike in comes from hunters. | ||
| It comes from hunting licenses. | ||
| That's where the Fish and Wildlife Service and these different organizations that are responsible for maintenance of the land that is hunted, hiked on, and camped on Some crazy amount, 95%, some crazy amount, I can't remember the percentage, comes from hunters and the dues and fees they have to pay to hunt that land. | ||
| So I think that the debate has to be couched in those terms, too. | ||
| If you really wanted to get rid of hunters, we wouldn't have revenue to actually maintain Well, I think there's also this need to appease a certain liberal part of the population that is very uncomfortable with hunting in the first place and would like to look at people hunting with dogs as, okay, Jesus Christ, that's barbaric. | ||
| You're sicking dogs on them and then you're shooting them. | ||
| It's a poor defenseless animal. | ||
|
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I understand. | |
| But there's, especially when it comes to predators, there's a population management issue that they're not willing to address. | ||
| And if you don't address that, you're gonna deal with it in the suburbs, okay? | ||
| They just shot a fucking mountain lion with a tranquilizer dart in Glendale the other day. | ||
| Yeah, in the news. | ||
| And they killed that one in Santa Monica a year ago that was 90 fucking pounds. | ||
| I saw one in Santa Barbara the other day. | ||
| I mean, I'm not comfortable, like, with those things, like, getting more popular. | ||
| Yeah, I'm never comfortable with terms like overpopulated because I don't know really how to define it, but... | ||
| Overpopulated in the sense that you're going to wind up seeing impacts that might be counter to what it is you're going after. | ||
| In fringe areas, you might lose species to predation and have predation have a serious effect on species that you maybe will want back at some point. | ||
| Isn't that what happened with wolves in Yellowstone? | ||
| Isn't that what is happening? | ||
| Yeah, for sure. | ||
| You're seeing a radical, radical decline. | ||
| A radical, very localized decline in elk and moose. | ||
| And it's hard for people. | ||
| If you look at a map of the country and what used to be wolf territory, and at the time of European contact, it was wolf country. | ||
| The entire nation was in some way or another had wolves. | ||
| Not the entire place, but a lot of it had wolves. | ||
| Now, let's say you're a guy and you live in Colorado, all right? | ||
| And you hear that they're hunting wolves in Montana. | ||
| You're probably thinking, but we don't even have wolves in Colorado. | ||
| Or we do, but there's not many and it's kind of controversial whether there's a stable breeding population or not. | ||
| And you're telling me that they're killing them right up in Montana. | ||
| Because it's hard for people to visualize the localized impact of these things. | ||
| So you can have too many wolves... | ||
| In Montana, and then jump down through Wyoming and enter Colorado, and you could have not enough. | ||
| You know? | ||
| Why is that? | ||
| The wolves, I guess they stay within a certain territory. | ||
| They stay within a certain territory, and they have a really, I mean, they have a profound effect on stuff. | ||
| You gotta think, like... | ||
| Have you guys been to Yellowstone National Park? | ||
| Yeah, when I was a kid. | ||
| Yellowstone National Park, you know, the last, like, Yellowstone National Park was hunted for, you know, 9 or 10,000 years. | ||
| I think the oldest artifact they found that they have reliably dated from Yellowstone, something like a spear point from 9,000 years ago. | ||
| That was mine. | ||
| Yeah, it was Joe's. | ||
| But the last 100 years, no one's hunted it. | ||
| That's kind of a lie. | ||
| When Yellowstone Park became a park, there was still an Indian war. | ||
| The Nez Perce went through there and killed some tourists while they were fleeing the US military. | ||
| After that, they banned hunting in Yellowstone National Park. | ||
| Anyone who goes to Yellowstone National Park now will see the way that elk and everything just has no concern for humans. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| They've ruled out that humans are troublesome. | ||
| So you had this long absence of no wolves in that ecosystem. | ||
| And when you put wolves back in, it's just taking those animals a really long time to figure out. | ||
| To get back to knowing what it's going to be. | ||
| And so we had inflated numbers of elk. | ||
| Some would argue inflated numbers of elk. | ||
| Some would argue inflated numbers of moose. | ||
| And when the wolves came back, it's just... | ||
| I mean, just plowed them into the ground. | ||
| There's mountain ranges that maybe had 9,000 elk, now they're down to less than 2,000. | ||
| I was talking with a guy from a conservation organization that deals with elk, and they're looking at the very Real probability of if the wolf situation ever does get under control in that area, of having to reintroduce elk into some mountain ranges because there's a paucity of breeding age females. | ||
| Oh my god, because they're all getting killed by wolves. | ||
|
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But you still have groups that are trying to stop the wolf hunts in Montana and Idaho. | |
| Well, the problem is also, I heard, you can't shoot your way out of this problem when it comes to wolves, in fact. | ||
| I'm surprised to hear that. | ||
| Yeah, but then that poison's boxes and all that. | ||
| Drones. | ||
| You're talking, Joe Ronald. | ||
| Look, I've never been a fan of wolves. | ||
| People try to pretend they're dogs and get all attached to them because it looks like your collie. | ||
| That's a fucking wolf, and that'll eat you. | ||
| And they've eaten people before. | ||
| In fact, I told a story on the podcast about France. | ||
| France? | ||
| Did I say it, Brian? | ||
| France? | ||
|
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Did you say France? | |
| The wolves that used to come in there. | ||
| 40 fucking people before they cornered them and killed them. | ||
| I mean, they've always eaten people. | ||
| I mean, I don't think there's any real argument to be made that there's a human risk. | ||
| Not yet. | ||
| No, but there's an argument to be made that there's an ecological risk. | ||
| I think there's still a human risk. | ||
| I think if you get around a big pack of them, and a child happens to be in that area while that's all going down, someone sneaks out of a house, and they have a farm. | ||
| There's a story I read online about this woman who was watching these wolves tear apart sheep in her backyard. | ||
| It was fucking wild, man. | ||
| They don't play around. | ||
| She said they got into this... | ||
| They had a pen of sheep, and they got in, and there was like four or five wolves were just running through, ripping these sheep apart. | ||
| And you just heard these horrific noises of tearing and growling and... | ||
| Horrible sheep screams. | ||
| And it's all just... | ||
| And she's looking out the window watching this going, holy fuck. | ||
| Imagine that. | ||
| That's going down in your yard. | ||
| And then they know that this is a place where food is. | ||
| How big is a Timberwolf? | ||
| They got up to like 120, 130 pounds. | ||
| Yeah, I think bigger than that. | ||
| Well, the real big ones that they're experiencing now, I mean, these deer are getting very large from eating all these elk and eating all these deer that didn't know they were coming. | ||
| There's people that are shooting them. | ||
| They're taking pictures of them. | ||
| You would swear it's a Photoshop. | ||
| These are enormous fucking wolves. | ||
| You're like, guys holding them and the thing looks as long as them. | ||
| I mean, I don't know what it weighs, but it's more than 150 pounds. | ||
| They're big dogs or big wolves. | ||
| I actually, like, you know, I don't want to get rid of all the wolves, man. | ||
| Like, I support wolf recovery. | ||
| Cam, you deal with wildlife, not so much wildlife politics, but sort of like public perception, public opinion. | ||
| Would you say that, I mean... | ||
| Hunters are being billed as wanting to destroy wolves, but I think that's not what I hear. | ||
|
unidentified
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No, it's not about destroying the wolf. | |
| Pull that mic up, brother. | ||
| Pull that mic up. | ||
|
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It's about getting that balance back. | |
| That's the thing. | ||
| So you've got these groups that are out there trying to stop the wolf hunt. | ||
| They want to put the wolf back on the endangered species list, even though the wolf is no longer endangered. | ||
| The wolf isn't threatened in these areas. | ||
| Again, these local areas that we're talking about here in the state of Idaho or the state of Montana. | ||
| There is a way to try to manage the wildlife so you get that balance. | ||
| But right now, what you've seen is sort of, it's out of whack. | ||
| And right now, the wolf has the advantage. | ||
| And we're continuing to give the advantage to the wolf in some of these states. | ||
| And I think that's why you're trying to, that's where that battle comes in right now. | ||
| No one wants to see, I don't think anybody wants to see wolves. | ||
| There's just people, these unrealistic urban people, and that's really what it boils down to. | ||
| The people that are really, almost all the people that are against hunting or against the idea of wildlife management, almost all of them live in cities. | ||
| When people live in a place where you... | ||
| You have to contend with it. | ||
| Someone has to be the top predator. | ||
| And if it's not going to be a person, it's not going to be people, and you're living around these animals, it's going to be them. | ||
| And that's just the reality of the food chain of life. | ||
| If you're a meek person and you're wandering around through the woods and you stumble into a pack of hungry wolves and haven't seen an elk because they've decimated the population, They'll kill you. | ||
| I mean, that's reality. | ||
| Might not happen. | ||
| Might not happen, but it's happened before. | ||
| A woman died in Alaska recently. | ||
| She was killed by wolves. | ||
| She was also wearing an elk suit. | ||
| Yeah, but that was the first documented case in a long time. | ||
| Yeah, like 100 years, right? | ||
| In that state, I think that 95% of traditional wolf habitat in Alaska is still occupied by wolves. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| And they have very, very few fatalities. | ||
| I think that moose kill more people than anything else. | ||
| Yellowstone National Park, the greatest cause of injury in Yellowstone National Park is getting gored by a buffalo. | ||
| My parents live in Utah, in Park City. | ||
| You know what they always tell you, the locals? | ||
| They go, hey, be careful of moose. | ||
| Please don't think of them as deer. | ||
| Do not approach them. | ||
| And what do people do? | ||
| They're like, there's a moose! | ||
| Going to take a picture. | ||
| And the moose is like, nah, I'm going to trample you now. | ||
| People get killed by moose. | ||
| Yeah, they'll fuck you up. | ||
|
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You should say, urban areas, a lot of people who grow up in urban areas, only live in urban areas, have very unrealistic expectations of what animals are. | |
| They have this anthropomorphic, you know, oh, it's thumper and it's bambi, and they don't understand. | ||
| No. | ||
| I just became a farmer now, so I have pigs and I have chickens. | ||
| It's so completely different to actually sit down and study these animals. | ||
| Are you doing it for a business? | ||
| Are you doing it for meat, to provide for yourself? | ||
|
unidentified
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Yes, all of the above. | |
| Eventually I like to get to the point where I can sell some, you know, we're doing heritage livestock and I was just discussing doing something like this recently. | ||
| I was like, it seems like if you have resources and you could get a plot of land and hire people to take care of it and grow it and have animals that you slaughter there and have food that you grow there, why wouldn't you do that? | ||
| If you could do that, why wouldn't you do that? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right, absolutely. | |
| But it drives me crazy to hear these people say, oh, but look, the pig is smiling, and the pig is happy, and the pig loves you, and how are you going to kill that pig and turn it into bacon? | ||
| I'm telling you, the pig doesn't love me. | ||
| The pig is a pig! | ||
| He might love you. | ||
|
unidentified
|
The pig doesn't know. | |
| He might love you, too. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I mean, I'm a lovable guy, but... | |
| Can I be honest with you? | ||
| Yes, you are. | ||
|
unidentified
|
We'll talk later. | |
| A good way to look at it is... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Man thoughts. | |
| We'll have some man thoughts together. | ||
| A good way to look at it is that pig is not going to live forever. | ||
| If you don't kill that pig, it's not going to turn into a fairy and cure cancer. | ||
| It's a fucking pig. | ||
| They live to be about 15 and then they die. | ||
| And when they die, if you don't eat them before they die, you lose all the delicious meat. | ||
|
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|
This pig, the pigs that I have on my farm would not exist. | |
| Unless we were going to eat them. | ||
| That's the only reason why they're around. | ||
| By that logic, you could make your own kids and start eating them. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Well, we were talking about cannibalism earlier. | |
| I made kids because where I live it gets cold. | ||
|
unidentified
|
See, I made kids for the free labor. | |
| See, I've got, unlike Steve, I've got five. | ||
| And hell yeah, it's about doing the chores and all the stuff I don't want to do. | ||
| Get out there and mow my yard. | ||
| How many do you have, Joe? | ||
| Pull it up. | ||
| Three. | ||
| Oh, you have three? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So, you don't have the facility where you would do this. | ||
| No, no, I don't. | ||
| But I would think about buying a piece of land and just getting something popping up. | ||
| That's a good idea, man. | ||
| It'd look sweet because it'd be like prominent podcast host, comic, actor, and farmer. | ||
| I think it makes... | ||
| Well, I have chickens. | ||
| Just recently got chickens so that I could eat their eggs. | ||
| But I've been thinking about this for a while. | ||
| Everybody's worried about... | ||
| GMO foods, and everybody's worried about like, you know, Monsanto, and they're worried about what's organic, what's not organic, and what are the standards. | ||
| If you grow your own shit, you know exactly what it is. | ||
| And you can take care of your soil. | ||
| Italy, still. | ||
| Italy, if you go through... | ||
| I took a train from... | ||
| He's trying to become sophisticated again. | ||
|
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|
This will read into a story about someone famous. | |
| When I went to Italy, I say Italy, everybody in their backyard grows their own food. | ||
| It's so common. | ||
| My grandfather used to do that. | ||
| People's backyards are gardens, man. | ||
| My grandfather did not have a big yard in New Jersey, but every part of the... | ||
| We got coconut water? | ||
| What do you want, man? | ||
| You want coffee? | ||
| Oh, yeah, I'll take coconut water. | ||
| You want a coffee? | ||
| You ever have bulletproof coffee? | ||
| Do you have bulletproof coffee? | ||
| Well, you explain it to me. | ||
| Yeah, bulletproof coffee is not just no mold. | ||
| Do we have any more? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'll make some, but there's no more. | |
| Okay, make some more, yeah. | ||
| I don't want trouble. | ||
| Son, it's not trouble. | ||
| We're here. | ||
| We're partying. | ||
| Let's get this freaking... | ||
| You want a beer? | ||
| Does anyone want a beer? | ||
| I beg your pardon, sir. | ||
| Yeah, a couple beers. | ||
| Hey, Jamie, bring out some beers, man. | ||
| Beer? | ||
| That's right, son. | ||
| Dick party. | ||
| What? | ||
| Dickpartyinyourmouth.com. | ||
| You said dick party. | ||
| Now I have a boner. | ||
| I forgot exactly what we were talking about. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Gardens and becoming a farmer? | |
| The idea's been fucking around with me for the past couple of months. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I didn't know you got chickens, man. | |
| So you could just have them right at your house. | ||
| Yeah, I built a chicken coop. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Do you have somebody taking care of it or is it just really easy? | |
| No, it's not that hard. | ||
| I just built a planter. | ||
| I didn't. | ||
| Yeah, beers. | ||
| I had a planter built. | ||
| I just think it's a great idea. | ||
| And I think that the idea of relying on somebody else for your own food ultimately is like, why would you do that if you have the resources? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yep. | |
| You know? | ||
| And is there only one left? | ||
| Is that what it is? | ||
| Bring them all out. | ||
| The idea that we all rely on supermarkets. | ||
| You look at what happened with Hurricane Sandy. | ||
| New York got shut down. | ||
| I was talking to my buddy Tommy. | ||
| He's like, I had to drive hours just to be able to use my cell phone. | ||
| The towers were down. | ||
| Everything was down. | ||
| There was no power. | ||
| Everything was fucked. | ||
| And, you know, him talking about it, he's like, dude, that was scary as shit, man. | ||
| He goes, because I realized, like, this whole thing is, like, very fragile. | ||
| Like, if you don't know where your food's coming from, he goes, we went to the supermarket, and it was just insane. | ||
| It was just empty shelf after empty shelf. | ||
| People had just taken everything. | ||
| There was nothing left. | ||
| So there's not a supply. | ||
| Sam, what about water? | ||
| I don't even have water reserves. | ||
| I don't have underground tunnels. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I have nothing. | |
| I save in my basement. | ||
| Now I'm getting to be, like, an old weird man where I save, um... | ||
| Freeze-dried food and stuff in my basement. | ||
| It's very smart. | ||
| But I still haven't done the water things, the one you gotta do. | ||
| I gotta get, you know, the water tank. | ||
| That's a big one. | ||
| The farming deal, home farming, my brother, he has those pack llamas. | ||
| You've seen those pack llamas? | ||
| Yeah, I love those things. | ||
| So he bought a 10-acre pasture, like a very unpicturesque, just like an irrigated pasture, and realized that his llamas would just inhabit like a back corner and wouldn't use diddly of this pasture. | ||
| So just because he's just a pragmatic, resourceful person, and he thought it's out there, it's getting wet and growing grass, so he started putting out lambs, and he put out goats, and now he's got a calf out there. | ||
| And this guy, he hunts so much, so he hunts all of his own meat, and he eats the meat he hunts. | ||
| And he just puts it out there and takes care of it and makes sure it has water, and then gives all that stuff to his friends. | ||
| Who come over and butcher the lambs and take them home and feed them to their kids. | ||
| It's just kind of a sense of like... | ||
| If the land's there, you know what I mean? | ||
| It's like, it's there, it's been manipulated by man. | ||
| It's not like he's preserving some kind of, like, you know, primeval ecosystem. | ||
| It's just an irrigated pasture of alfalfa. | ||
| He's like, why not just have that be, like, have output? | ||
| It's just pleasant to look out my window and be like, it's producing. | ||
| It's producing things. | ||
| When you have an acre of land or whatever that is, and he's growing alfalfa, is that all you need for the animal to live, basically? | ||
| You just put it out there and they just live on that? | ||
| Well, I'm delving way into stuff I don't understand now, but I know that Camper, I speak to this better, that he's got alfalfa, but it's an old alfalfa field. | ||
| So I think people typically, in some areas I know, replant alfalfa every seven years because eventually the alfalfa loses out to other plant species. | ||
| It's my understanding, I don't know for sure, that there's a lot of animals, if you go out and put them on just that, I'm sure there's a lot of guys that know a lot about this, like, cringing right now. | ||
| If you go out and put them on just alfalfa, it's considered to be, like, a hot food, and they'll overeat. | ||
| It's too rich, and they can damage themselves if you put them out on just, like, pure alfalfa. | ||
| That's interesting, because I read that deer that eat out of alfalfa fields are delicious, that they actually have, like, a little more fat to them. | ||
| Some species can hack it, but I know, I think that I've been told that horses... | ||
| Does any of this make sense to you? | ||
|
unidentified
|
A little bit, but I'm more pig and chicken as opposed to lamb and stuff. | |
| Does that make sense with alfalfa making the deer taste better? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, I think it would. | |
| But the deer is not going to just be eating alfalfa either. | ||
| I mean, the deer is going to be roaming and getting a lot of different sources. | ||
| How much land as a farmer do you need to grow your own meat and your own vegetables? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Not much, man. | |
| I mean, really, not much. | ||
| You could do it on... | ||
| So we've got 40 acres, but right now we're only using about four. | ||
| We've got our big garden. | ||
| We've got our chickens that are free-ranging. | ||
| We've got the pigs. | ||
| We're going to be getting some dairy goats. | ||
| And really, four acres is... | ||
| We don't even use all that space. | ||
| I mean, they're spread out. | ||
| The pigs are over here. | ||
| The chickens are over here. | ||
| The goats are out in another outer pasture. | ||
| But you guys could feed... | ||
| Like, 30 people off 40 acres. | ||
| Or way more. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Well, that's why, you know, eventually, like, what we want to do is to get into the business side of it and to start, you know, selling some stuff and really even, like, some of the vegetables. | |
| You know, I want to do a pickle company one day. | ||
| I want to start pickling shit. | ||
| And, you know... | ||
| What are your pigs... | ||
| What do you feed your pigs? | ||
|
unidentified
|
So, right now... | |
| Assholes. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Assholes. | ||
| Human assholes. | ||
| TSA workers. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| We have pig feed right now that they sell in big old dog food bags. | ||
| We go to Tractor Supply and get 50 pound bags of pig feed. | ||
| They eat the roots and the pig pen and then we're about ready to move them out to a bigger area that's going to be about an acre. | ||
| And they'll wander around. | ||
| They'll eat. | ||
| They must eat a shitload though. | ||
| When I was a kid. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Dude, never stopped. | |
| When I was a kid, my stepdad, he was in school, and one of the agriculture classes that he had to take was like this co-op farm that people in the school all did together. | ||
| They had animals, and they grew plants, and it was a pretty involved thing. | ||
| And I remember even as a kid saying, what a cool idea, the idea that they all chip in together. | ||
| Everybody does a little piece of something, and everyone communicates what needs to get done. | ||
| And if you think about that, in a real neighborhood, man, You could have, as long as you had the soil and as long as you had the resources to get it started and then make it so it's self-sufficient, if you had a sizable piece of land and everybody sort of chipped in and you grew livestock and you grew plants and you fed them and everything, it seems like It would be so economically manageable. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| Can you imagine if we all got all our food from a lot down the corner where we all knew that this goat had eaten all this food that we had given it and you knew exactly where the tomato came from because you put the fucking seed in the ground. | ||
| This is happening to the point we're in cities now. | ||
| They have flatbed trucks that you can rent where you have a flatbed truck. | ||
| They got a bunch of soil on that flatbed truck. | ||
| They're also doing it on roofs. | ||
| And so what people are doing is getting timeshares and saying, I want to buy a share of that flatbed truck. | ||
| Flatbed trail comes out, you garden it, you take your vegetables for the day, and it moves on to the next house. | ||
| Also, they're doing it with, like, there's a lot of roof space. | ||
| Like, in China, they built a whole city, I guess, where the roofs are basically planters to grow the food for the city. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I just saw a story out of Chicago where they're using like some of the old warehouses and they're just turning them into indoor farms. | |
| Did you see those two CIA workers whose house got broken into in Kansas? | ||
| The fucking DEA came in guns blazing because they thought these people were growing weed. | ||
| And they were former CIA agents, and they were growing tomatoes and vegetables in their basement. | ||
| They had a whole hydroponic vegetable system set up with lights. | ||
| Well, these assholes drive around looking for a heat signature from your home that shows that you're using some extraordinary amount of light. | ||
| Which mostly people are using to grow weed. | ||
| So they come in, fucking guns out, and, you know, DEA, dogs and shit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No pot! | |
| And it's two fucking former CIA agents going, you crazy assholes! | ||
| The fuck is wrong with you? | ||
| How about you knock on the door, I show you my badge, and my fucking tomatoes. | ||
| Right. | ||
| You know, I wanna, I wanna... | ||
| Right. | ||
| How about you do a fucking search of the guy who lives there? | ||
| Oh, it's that CIA guy! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Let's fucking, let's go arrest him and his wife. | |
| They're probably selling weed. | ||
| CIA, it makes sense. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, exactly. | ||
| Crazy fucks. | ||
| We had this thing happen recently where it was like this perfect cohesion of hunting and farming. | ||
| We're down in Florida and we're hunting turkeys on this guy's ranch. | ||
| And the guy keeps coming and getting us because he wants us to go out at night and run hogs with his hound dogs. | ||
| And what it is, he's got a cattle ranch. | ||
| It's near Okeechobee, Florida. | ||
| And there's a, I heard two figures, 55,000 or 45,000 acre nature preserve down there. | ||
| It has a lot of rare native birds on it. | ||
| And the nature preserve's MO is they just acquire agricultural land. | ||
| They take out the dike systems and put it back in bird habitat. | ||
| It's funny because this guy actually has sold this preserve some of his land, and he is putting his whole place into a conservation easement so that at a time, he's like, my whole place is going to be part of that. | ||
| He was actually glad about it. | ||
| He liked the preserve. | ||
| But a big enemy of the preserve is wild pigs, which consume a lot of ground-nesting shorebird eggs. | ||
| So they have a guy... | ||
| The preserve is so tight, so tightly administered, that in most areas you can't walk around in there. | ||
| And they have a guy that contracts to kill wild pigs. | ||
| So this guy has a contract where he's supposed to kill X number of pigs every year. | ||
| He can't in any way keep up with them. | ||
| This guy that has his cattle ranch likes to hunt pigs, and he would always go back and hunt the boundary between his ranch and the preserve because there's such a great influx of pigs coming off the preserve at night, coming onto his ranch to get into less utilized land. | ||
| But his dogs would chase him, and the pigs would promptly run back into that preserve where he couldn't pursue them. | ||
| So he gets some hog-proof fence and builds a 400-acre enclosure abutting the preserve. | ||
| On the wall of his fence that actually adjoins the preserve, he puts in trapdoors, hinged doors. | ||
| So the pigs can come in and out. | ||
| In, but they can't go out. | ||
| No, but he props the door open. | ||
| And he kind of watches, and he's always out there checking for tracks. | ||
| And after a while, he'll realize there's a lot of pig traffic coming out of the preserve onto his land. | ||
| Then what he'll do, he knows that they come out, after dark, they come onto his ranch, and before daybreak, they drift back to the preserve. | ||
| Closes the door. | ||
| So he goes out at four in the morning, And pop, pop, pop, pop, pop. | ||
| Shuts all those doors. | ||
| He's got these doors strung out for like a mile. | ||
| He's got them strung out for like a mile. | ||
| Every ten yards. | ||
| Oh, wow. | ||
| These little doors with a stick holding them. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's hilarious. | |
| So he just drives this thing down, pulls all the sticks. | ||
| That's hilarious. | ||
| And then cuts his dogs loose. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| So we go out with him and right away... | ||
|
unidentified
|
What the fuck? | |
| What kind of dogs? | ||
| Are these pit bulls or... | ||
| Pit bull-esque. | ||
| I'm not good enough with dogs. | ||
| He's got bloodhounds. | ||
| He's got trailers and catchers. | ||
| Two different types of dogs. | ||
| His bloodhounds find him, but he don't like to let the bloodhounds actually catch the pig. | ||
| In fact, one of his dogs got really tore up. | ||
| Then he puts a holding dog out. | ||
| Big pit bull-like dog. | ||
| Who secures the pig. | ||
| The first pig we catch. | ||
| Those Argentino dogs, too. | ||
| Doggo Argentino. | ||
| They use them as well. | ||
| They use American Bulldogs, too. | ||
| The first one we get, it's not even dark yet, and we get one. | ||
| It's a big boar. | ||
| And he's intact. | ||
| He's got his nutsack on him still. | ||
| And the guy... | ||
| Why, do the dogs usually pull it off? | ||
| No, I'm getting a little bit ahead of myself. | ||
| Just hold that piece of information for me. | ||
| Nutsack. | ||
| He's got his nutsack on him. | ||
| Hold the nutsack. | ||
|
unidentified
|
For a moment, Joe. | |
| And he says this one won't be any good to eat. | ||
| Like, they're too lean. | ||
| They got a lot of testosterone. | ||
| They don't take good care of themselves. | ||
| And he takes this pig. | ||
| It's a big pig, you know. | ||
| Not big, not like the ones you see on the internet, but a sizable 170-pound pig. | ||
| And he puts it in a trailer, just to confine in there. | ||
| We go out hunting again, and the violator, the dogs, bust this other pig out of a palm grove, they call it a hammock, like an island of palm trees out in the grasslands. | ||
| And they catch it. | ||
| And this pig's castrated. | ||
| And it castrated, like a boar that's been castrated as a barrow hog. | ||
| And the incision where the hog had been castrated is all healed up. | ||
| And they told me that when we catch a boar, we always castrate it. | ||
| And then turn it back loose. | ||
| Because two things happen. | ||
| One, the pig won't procreate, won't contribute to the problem that the preserver is having, and the problem that he has for pigs on his land, rooting his area up. | ||
| And it'll do what he says is, take its mind off grass and put it on, you know, take its mind off ass and put it on the grass. | ||
| And he says, in 90 days, that boar will be fantastic eating. | ||
| And they'll have a layer of fat on it. | ||
| So we cut the juggler on the castrated pig and kept it for meat. | ||
| And it smelled great and was beautiful. | ||
| The next day, we go out with the boar we caught. | ||
| And they take a knife and castrate that boar and turn him out, knowing that sometime down the road they'll be lucky and catch that boar again, and he'll be a barrel, and then he'll be good to eat. | ||
|
unidentified
|
So these boys do this every week, man. | |
| How do you secure a powerful boar's head? | ||
| I'm telling you what. | ||
| It's amazing watching the dogs take them and hold them. | ||
| Yeah, but these guys are cattle ranchers. | ||
| These guys are cattle ranchers. | ||
| I mean, it's a daily occurrence for them to wrassle. | ||
| One, the dog does it because they grab him by the ear, grab him by the head, and pin him down. | ||
| Now, the tracking dogs caught the pig, and the pig caught one of the tracking dogs real good. | ||
| And he was going to take that dog to the vet. | ||
| And I asked him, I bet your vet probably... | ||
| You know, doesn't like you bringing in dogs that may have gotten injured in something that the vet might regard as unnecessary. | ||
| Right. | ||
| He goes, yeah, but that's why I go to a vet who likes to run pigs with his dogs. | ||
| Well, once you start realizing how many pigs there are, especially Texas, there's millions of feral pigs. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really? | |
| Millions. | ||
| They have a real problem. | ||
| Millions. | ||
| They have a real problem. | ||
| Look, I know you don't like that show, Pig Man, but I like it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No, no, no. | |
| I don't say that. | ||
| I don't say that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
There's an anti-intellectualism. | |
| I have an aesthetic. | ||
| I have a hunting aesthetic and an approach to wildlife that I admire and that I try to stand by. | ||
| No, I know you do. | ||
| We had long conversations about it. | ||
| So helicopter gunships are not your... | ||
| Well, it's not really hunting. | ||
| It's not my idea, honey. | ||
| It's not really hunting. | ||
| I mean, what they're doing is they're getting away with being psychopaths. | ||
| And if you haven't seen it, Brian, pull it up. | ||
| It's eradication of a pest. | ||
| It's Pigman and Ted Nugent shoot pigs from a helicopter. | ||
| They give all the money, all the meat to the needy, by the way. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Look, and by the way, it's a real fucking problem. | ||
| They really do have to eradicate these populations of pigs. | ||
| They tear up, I mean, they show these crops that are getting fucked up by these pigs in the episode. | ||
| I want some hog. | ||
| Let's go hunting. | ||
| Can we do that again? | ||
| But this is what I wanted to ask you. | ||
| What does the one with his nuts taste like? | ||
| You didn't tell us that. | ||
| We haven't cooked it yet. | ||
| We're cooking it on April 25th. | ||
| But it won't be as good, you don't think? | ||
| Oh, no, no, I'm sorry. | ||
| No, no. | ||
| Okay, on April 25th, I'm cooking the caster, the barrel hog. | ||
| Now, I have eaten boars with their nuts, but I've never eaten a boar that was as aged and as venerable as that one. | ||
| You could tell that he was a very old, battle-scarred boar and very lean. | ||
| And these guys, I might have eaten it and thought it was okay, and it might be that these guys have very high expectations. | ||
| They pig hunt enough where they have a sense of what's best and what's not best. | ||
| The same way that you might disregard half a hot dog laying on the side of the road, but another person might be in a situation where they really appreciate that hot dog. | ||
| So for these guys who hunt boars a lot, The worst example of all time. | ||
| And eat them and love to eat them. | ||
| They were like, nuh-uh. | ||
| And when I expressed interest in the intact hog, being like, I don't care, I want it, they were so adamant that it wouldn't be good that they were denying me getting it. | ||
| And it wasn't because they were in love with the pig. | ||
| They were like, no, no, no, we'll get you a good one. | ||
| We'll get you a good one. | ||
| That was no good for you. | ||
| Maybe he would like it more. | ||
| I tend to like leaner meat anyway. | ||
| I do too. | ||
| But I will tell you this. | ||
| When they do, and I've done a bit of pig hunting, and they can get where they do have quite an odor to them. | ||
| And this boar just stunk like boar. | ||
| But this is coming from a guy who will eat blackberries that have been feeding on salmon. | ||
| What is that like? | ||
| Dead salmon. | ||
| It's like rotten salmon. | ||
| Their meat tastes like rotten salmon? | ||
| Yeah, because I'm telling you, man, the fat... | ||
| The fat just carries. | ||
| There's a book, Harold McGee's book on cooking, the science and lore of cooking or science and lore of the kitchen. | ||
| He has an explanation there why animal fat is such a reliable indicator of what the animal's been up to in history. | ||
| Well, you showed that on your show. | ||
| Yeah, refer your listeners to that rather than try to explain it myself. | ||
| But you showed that on your show when you shot that bear that had eaten blueberries. | ||
| It's just unbelievable. | ||
| And you can just drink the fat. | ||
| You can melt the fat and drink it and it tastes good. | ||
| Now, the fat on a salmon bear, you really have to carefully, and this is in the spring when they haven't actually eaten a salmon in six months or something, you have to very carefully trim that fat away. | ||
| Then the flesh becomes more palatable. | ||
| But it's just kind of atrocious. | ||
| And I got a friend in Montana. | ||
| He shot a bear over a rotten cow one time. | ||
| Same thing, he thought it was nearly inedible. | ||
| So what do you do when you have that situation? | ||
| Do you continue to eat the animal just out of respect? | ||
| If I'm eating meat that's great, super high quality meat, I cook in a high quality way where I do as little to it as possible. | ||
| We ate some pretty straight up meat when we were out. | ||
| Yeah, right out of the animal. | ||
| Just like meat cooked to warm with salt on it. | ||
| If I get an animal that's funky, and I killed a female pig one time that was probably one of the worst game animals I've ever done, A, I'm just going to eat it. | ||
| For me, any displeasure I experience eating off-tasting flesh Isn't as bad as the displeasure that I would experience from having killed a big game animal and not consumed it. | ||
| That's a very great statement. | ||
| So, for me, it's just, I'm going to eat it. | ||
| And whether I make pepperoni sticks, if it's bad, I make pepperoni sticks, I eat the thing. | ||
| And I haven't always done that. | ||
| I've explained to you many times, I used to do a lot of fur trapping, sell animal furs. | ||
| But now, at this point in my life, and my relationship with hunting now, I... You know, like to eat what I hunt for. | ||
| To the point, I mean, we ate a coyote not long ago down in Mexico. | ||
| How many times do you hear that? | ||
| How many times do you hear anybody say that? | ||
| You're the only person on the planet. | ||
| This is what's great about the podcast. | ||
| We ate a coyote in Mexico. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| I never thought I'd meet someone who ate a fucking coyote. | ||
| That's as weird as saying, I kill people sometimes. | ||
| Oh my god, why did you eat a coyote? | ||
| That's great. | ||
| Yeah, pull his people up and tell us a little story, Uncle Steve. | ||
| People so often, I get asked, like, as the guy that's eating stuff, I get asked all the time, like, what is it like to eat this? | ||
| What is it like to eat that? | ||
| And I have fielded the question about what's it like to eat a coyote so many times that I started to feel like it was professional, like, malfeasance for me to not have a good answer. | ||
| You know, to be like, I have- Professional malfeasance. | ||
| We do not have a good answer to what a fucking coyote tastes like. | ||
| Yeah, so it's like, as a professional development, I wanted to know, and we got a coyote, and uh- So you have to eat the whole coyote now, in your mind? | ||
| We ate, like, well, there's a handful of us there, and we put the vast majority of that thing down. | ||
|
unidentified
|
We put the vast majority of that thing down. | |
| We burned the hair off it. | ||
| We burned all the hair off it and then roasted it. | ||
| Wow. | ||
|
unidentified
|
How was it? | |
| Skin on. | ||
| What did it taste like? | ||
| Well, I gotta steal, like, the best description, I had to steal this from my buddy, Remy Warren, I was hunting with. | ||
| And Remy Warren tasted it, and this is an esoteric comparison. | ||
| Remy Warren tasted it. | ||
| He's a hunting guide. | ||
| And he said, uh, it tastes like overcooked diver duck. | ||
| Well, that's interesting. | ||
| That's the closest I can come to. | ||
| For folks who don't know, you explained this to us on the trip, too. | ||
| There's diver ducks and floaters. | ||
| Is that what they call the other ones? | ||
| Yeah, like a non-biological taxonomy with ducks would be like puddle ducks and diver ducks. | ||
| Or people call them dabbler ducks. | ||
| So ducks that don't Go underwater to hunt. | ||
| The ducks that eat fish are the ones you don't want to eat. | ||
| Divers eat a lot more animal matter And diver ducks and puddle ducks eat a lot more vegetation. | ||
| See, but to you, that expression, an overcooked diver duck, totally made sense. | ||
| These folks on the subway right now are going, I don't know what the fuck this guy's talking about. | ||
| What the fuck is he talking about? | ||
| A fucking overcooked diver duck. | ||
| What does that even mean? | ||
| I'm gonna do that the next time I eat something I don't like. | ||
| I'm gonna be like, man, this tastes a lot like diver duck. | ||
| Thanks. | ||
| Yeah, you had a couple shots on the show at Pheasants too, right? | ||
| We couldn't quite get one. | ||
| I just realized that some ducks are carnivorous. | ||
| I never thought of them being carnivorous. | ||
| And even some puddle ducks, some puddle ducks or dabbler ducks, eat a lot of plant matter. | ||
| So of the puddle ducks, one of the not great tasting ones is a northern shoveler. | ||
| And northern shovelers eat a lot of animal matter. | ||
| But you can take the best duck on the planet, in my mind, and be like, I love mallard ducks. | ||
| But if you get mallard ducks in Southeast Alaska, like near my cabin, you can barely eat those mallard ducks. | ||
| Because even though they're mallards, and in most areas they taste great, in Southeast Alaska those mallards in the late summer are just in there hammering invertebrates. | ||
| So they're hunting the tide line, eating exposed invertebrates up and down there. | ||
| And you get those ducks, and they taste like coyote. | ||
| They're eating invertebrates, meaning clams. | ||
| It's so important. | ||
| Yeah, like little insects and clams. | ||
| People who don't understand modern methods of farming and the way that animals are fed and the foods that they're fed don't understand the whole corn versus grass-fed debate. | ||
| Right. | ||
| We've talked about it so many times in the podcast that people hashtag things, grass-fed, when it has nothing to do with it, they're just being silly. | ||
| But cows are supposed to eat fucking grass. | ||
| That's right, they're ruminants. | ||
| And when you give a cow some corn, the whole thing is, it's like giving a person corn. | ||
| We get fat as fuck. | ||
| Corn syrup and shit. | ||
| Yeah, that's why they have four stomachs or whatever it is, to break down that grass. | ||
| Not only that, I bet you the corn doesn't grow as good magic mushrooms. | ||
| I bet you the corn poop, I bet it's a fucking mess. | ||
| It's not grass pumped through the stomach of a double annulat cow. | ||
| It's corn. | ||
| We're using big words. | ||
| You used the word a butt. | ||
| Poor fucker, eating corn, growing abscesses in his body. | ||
| Have you ever seen that food egg? | ||
| That's why they have to, they grow, the liver's abscessed, that's why they have to give him antibiotics. | ||
| Meanwhile, God damn, it's delicious. | ||
| That's a problem. | ||
| It's so good. | ||
| A good ribeye, a fatty corn-fed ribeye. | ||
| It's not perfect. | ||
| When I'm feeling healthy, I like grass-fed. | ||
| I like a grass-fed sirloin lean. | ||
| The best meat I've ever had in my life was a corn-fed ribeye from Whole Foods. | ||
| And I cooked that, and I'm telling you, me and my buddy ate it, and it was just the best I've ever had. | ||
| You were probably high. | ||
| I wasn't. | ||
| I was sober. | ||
| I think the best meat I've ever eaten in my life was two things. | ||
| One, the liver and the heart of that deer that we ate. | ||
| When we're sitting there by a campfire, chopping up, and we had to cut around the bullet hole. | ||
| We were also hungry, though, and we'd spent three days eating those bad mountain dehydrated... | ||
| Those were not that bad. | ||
| I'm telling you, I thought that those mountain bags were going to taste way worse than they tasted. | ||
| I thought they were delicious. | ||
| It's situational. | ||
| Yeah, but it's not as good as the meat. | ||
| No, we work with a guy, and he's like, I don't care about food. | ||
| I just want to be full and then go do what I want to do. | ||
| And so he's always talking about, he's like, yeah, I'll be home, and I'll be home and I'll eat freeze-dried food. | ||
| Because it's just more efficient for me. | ||
| I just want to be done and then go do what I want to do. | ||
| Well, I can understand being obsessed with something else, but you can enjoy food as well, you dumb fuck. | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| I like food. | ||
| Food's awesome. | ||
| My buddy's a stuntman that hit the back of his head in an accident, and he lost his sense of smell and taste. | ||
| And he doesn't care that much about food. | ||
| That dude probably eats ass like a champion. | ||
|
unidentified
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Yeah. | |
| I know. | ||
| Can't smell it. | ||
| He might be the greatest ass eater in the universe. | ||
| That's right. | ||
| Who's going to compete with that guy? | ||
|
unidentified
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Some poo? | |
| What's that? | ||
| Big deal. | ||
| Whatever. | ||
| I have no future. | ||
| Jimmy Burke one time said to me, he goes, I said, he said something like, I ate her ass, and I kind of made a face. | ||
| He goes, What's the matter? | ||
| What's the matter? | ||
| You don't stick your tongue in a girl's ass? | ||
| You're going to get shit on your tongue? | ||
| So fucking what? | ||
| I can't talk to you. | ||
| And he just walked away. | ||
| I never said anything. | ||
| All I did was make a little face. | ||
| He goes, what's the matter? | ||
| It's natural to make that face unless you've had four Jack and Cokes and you've been in that situation where you're really trying to impress a gal. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| And you're like, whoa. | ||
| We've all gotten in that sexual frenzy. | ||
| Put the spurs on, son. | ||
| You get in that frenzy where you're like, fuck it. | ||
| Do you have that video of the Ted Nugent Pigman adventures? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Well, there's just like a 30-second clip. | |
| Yeah, that's fine. | ||
| Check this. | ||
| I want Steve Rinello's take on this, if you've never seen this before. | ||
| Ted Nugent and Pigman are in a fucking helicopter, and this is fucking crazy. | ||
| It's now legal to hunt in Texas from helicopters! | ||
| It is one of the most entertaining episodes of any television show I've ever seen in my life. | ||
| It's watching Ted Nugent and Pigman take out wild hogs from a fucking helicopter. | ||
| I'm like, this is some shit that after the fall of America, a thousand years from now, when they're trying to decode our history, they're going to watch that. | ||
| Holy fuck. | ||
| They were flying in helicopters, joking around about headshots. | ||
| Those pigs are fast. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He killed 455 pigs that day. | |
| No. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| 455? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| That's a lot of pigs. | ||
| Those are some fast pigs. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Ted Nugent killed 455 pigs with a machine gun from a helicopter. | |
| For Bill Maher. | ||
| For Bill Maher. | ||
| Oh, Bill Maher is a very, very anti-hunting guy. | ||
| Well, he's in PETA. Bill Maher? | ||
| Yes, Bill Maher supports PETA. Which, by the way, kills more cats and dogs than anybody. | ||
|
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96% of the animals that come into their shelter. | |
| Yeah, they put them down. | ||
| I just don't even know what to say about that. | ||
| They get so crazy. | ||
| It's like, when is it okay to kill, and when is it not okay to kill? | ||
| You're killing puppies, and you're mad at people that are killing deer, and they're eating them. | ||
| I am losing the script here, because that doesn't even make any fucking sense. | ||
| That's one of the craziest, most ridiculously hypocritical things I've ever heard over my life. | ||
| What do you mean they kill puppies? | ||
|
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When people go to PETA and say, you know, I've got a stray dog here. | |
| My dog just had puppies. | ||
| I don't know what to do with them. | ||
| I'll give them to the animal lovers at PETA. These dogs die. | ||
| Most of them they put down because they have to because they don't have the resources to take care of those dogs. | ||
| That doesn't matter. | ||
| I don't care if you don't have the resources. | ||
| You're killing puppies and cats. | ||
| By the way, you're trying to keep it secret, too. | ||
| You don't go advertising and telling people, hey, listen, if you don't come down and take these things as pets, we're going to kill them. | ||
| No, you're doing it on the sneak tip and people have to find out about it through the internet. | ||
| And then on top of that, you're criticizing people that are hunting and feeding their family with what they know to be a really healthy animal instead of this mystery fucking chain of command that happens when you buy a cheeseburger from Burger King or wherever, name your fast food joint. | ||
| Who knows what the fuck happened to that cow before it was converted into cheeseburgers. | ||
| You know, you don't know a goddamn thing. | ||
| And the fact that they would go after one while killing puppies and kittens, that's insanity. | ||
| That is insanity. | ||
| You know, a thing that rings false to me, and, you know, I'm walking on, like, I gotta tread delicately here on the issue of the helicopter thing. | ||
| Can't deny the awesomeness of it. | ||
| One thing that rings false to me, though, is when guys do... | ||
| This is so hard to put. | ||
| It's like, Dan, if you do, Dan, if you don't. | ||
| I'm going to try to go for it. | ||
| When someone does... | ||
| If someone goes out and shoots a bunch of something because they're overpopulated for a rancher, it's like, in some way, you have to be self-honest, too, and acknowledge that you're not just doing an altruistic act. | ||
| You know, like I enjoy to hunt, you know. | ||
| So when I hunt on my buddy's ranch in California, I'm glad that he figures he has too many pigs. | ||
| Because it allows me to go pig hunting. | ||
| And I like to go pig hunting. | ||
| I like to eat pigs. | ||
| But I would never, like, I don't then say to my wife, I'm like, I really don't want to do it. | ||
| But my buddy's in trouble. | ||
| He's got a lot of pigs. | ||
| And I'm going to go out, and as much as it's going to be a drag, I'm going to go out and help them. | ||
| Because we need to fight our way through this pig problem. | ||
| And we all need to give our share. | ||
| Because if my buddy would call me and say, you know what I've got a real problem with? | ||
| My fences are down. | ||
| Can you come out and spend a weekend fixing all my fences? | ||
| That really is the problem I have right now. | ||
|
unidentified
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I'd be like, no, but what are those pigs up to? | |
| You having a problem with them? | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| Well, it's natural to, first of all, the hunting them is natural, and the dealing with the overpopulation is a real issue for people that do have farms and do have ranches. | ||
| You've got to deal with that. | ||
| And to get bullshit, to take crap from people that are killing puppies and kittens, like, man, we need to come to an understanding here. | ||
| Here's the real issue. | ||
| It's not PETA. It's not the problem of being ethical towards animals. | ||
| It's crazy assholes that do illogical shit. | ||
| And that's the problem with a lot of animal activists. | ||
| It's the problem with a lot of people that claim to love animals more than they love people. | ||
| You're out of your mind if you love a dog more than you love people. | ||
| You're out of your mind. | ||
| You're out of your mind. | ||
| That's a one-way relationship. | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| That thing doesn't talk to you about stuff. | ||
| It doesn't challenge you on issues. | ||
| It doesn't tell you it loves you. | ||
| It doesn't help you grow. | ||
| It's a goddamn dog. | ||
| And I love my dogs. | ||
| But you're crazy if you like animals more than people. | ||
| And the people that are involved Just for whatever reason, there's a certain percentage, it's not all of them, but a certain percentage of people that are involved in animal rights movements have a distorted perception of the relationship between humans and animals. | ||
| And their relationship is not one of admiration or respect. | ||
| It becomes what you were talking about, the anthropomorphic sort of a thing. | ||
| It's like it's Bambi. | ||
| Or it's like, you know, I saw someone was talking about when the mountain lion got shot in Santa Monica. | ||
| You know, they should fucking shoot people. | ||
| I'd be happier if a person was shot in that mountain line. | ||
|
unidentified
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I'm like, that was a mountain line in fucking Santa Monica, man! | |
| Santa Monica is really urban, okay? | ||
| There's no parks. | ||
| There's no parks. | ||
| There's no giant places where there's all trees. | ||
| There's no Central Park in Santa Monica. | ||
|
unidentified
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It's houses. | |
| A few years ago, there was a black bear in Bergen County, New Jersey. | ||
| Do you remember that? | ||
| No, I don't. | ||
| North Jersey. | ||
| And same thing. | ||
| That's where Joey Diaz is from, by the way. | ||
|
unidentified
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It's right near Hoboken. | |
| You know, you got a black bear wandering around Hoboken. | ||
| Hoboken, you fuck. | ||
| Where are you from? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Hoboken. | |
| Hoboken is the French. | ||
| I'm from Oklahoma. | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Sorry about that. | |
| This guy might be from North Korea. | ||
| What is your background, sir? | ||
| He's infiltrated our defenses. | ||
|
unidentified
|
So here's my excuse for how I mispronounce. | |
| What is it? | ||
| Hoboken. | ||
| Hoboken. | ||
| He says New York, too. | ||
|
unidentified
|
All right, so I've got a little bit of a beef with Hoboken. | |
| Because when I was a kid, I lived in Ridgewood, New Jersey for a year. | ||
| Ridgewood had a law in the books that said you could actually not play video games until you were sixteen years old. | ||
| There was a ban on video games in Ridgewood, New Jersey. | ||
| So as an eight-year-old in North Jersey, I had to go to Hoboken to a diner to play a German version of Pac-Man. | ||
| So when I think of Hoboken, I don't really think of how to pronounce it. | ||
| I just think of my My fond memories of playing a German version of Pac-Man with the name of the ghosts were like, you know, 18 characters long. | ||
| So that's the thing. | ||
| I think diners, I think black bears, I think Pac-Man. | ||
| And now I think Hoboken and Joe Rogan will kick my ass if I ever miss an ass. | ||
| So the issue was that there was a bear in that area? | ||
|
unidentified
|
There's a bear. | |
| There have been bear sightings in every county in New Jersey. | ||
| Wow. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Every county in New Jersey. | |
| And they just made bear hunting legal in the last half a decade or so, right? | ||
|
unidentified
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Yeah, it was illegal for a long time. | |
| They brought it back. | ||
| And then a couple years ago when Corzine was governor, they put a stop to it again over the objections of the Wildlife Commission there in the state. | ||
| And how do you get wildlife commissions? | ||
| That's what drives me crazy. | ||
| How do you get wildlife commissions that are run by people who are animal rights activists? | ||
| And why does that happen? | ||
| And how is that possible that that happens? | ||
|
unidentified
|
You got it in California right now because the governor appoints So many people, and they're going to have so many hunters, and now they're going to bring a – they're going to say, well, okay, so the hunters get a seat at the table, but we also have to have the animal rights activists have a seat at the table too. | |
| But the idea that they're trying to – I mean an animal rights activist is automatically going to be anti-hunting. | ||
|
unidentified
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Right. | |
| Absolutely. | ||
| It just doesn't make any sense that someone could be in charge of wildlife management and be anti-hunting. | ||
| What that is is this convenient ignorance that a lot of people that don't understand wildlife have. | ||
| And I did until I started getting into it before I started paying attention, whatever it was, a decade or so. | ||
| I think, though, that a lot of these wildlife management councils, etc., have done a pretty good job of... | ||
| Doing their job and I don't... | ||
| Not in liberal states though. | ||
| The issue is when states like in California where they're making illogical decisions like the lack of dogs in black bear and in mountain lion hunts. | ||
| They're hard enough to fucking kill and to control the population and especially when you're dealing with predators like you have a responsibility as a human being to keep the population in control. | ||
| I'm not saying you should run them to the point of extinction, but you have a... | ||
| I think Every human in a community has, if possible to control predators, you should. | ||
| There's a responsibility to keep a certain amount of control on the situation. | ||
| And when you start doing shit like saying, well, you can't hunt with dogs, or you can't do this, or you can't do that... | ||
| What should be is how many numbers are they killing? | ||
| There's not a lot of mountain lions getting killed. | ||
| It's not easy to do. | ||
| They're not in danger, right? | ||
| No! | ||
| They're not in danger anymore. | ||
| Right now, you're seeing an expansion in range. | ||
| And it's different than what people think. | ||
| Some of the states that have the most heavy hunting for mountain lions are actually turning out to be areas that are population sources. | ||
| So there's a movement right now. | ||
| I was just reading this paper recently where they were doing some work on lions, and they were thinking that with the abundance of lions in California, with the loss of hound hunting, that they would be seeing Californian lions going in to fill Ecosystems vacated by harvested lions in Nevada. | ||
| What they're finding instead is in spite of all, like the basin and range country in Nevada, in spite of the hunting, is still able to produce lions and they're seeing lions going in a different direction. | ||
| They're seeing lions going, spreading out displaced young males, spreading out from Nevada into California. | ||
| Now it could be two things. | ||
| It could be somehow that their buddy called them from California and said, dude, come here. | ||
| They will not mess with you. | ||
| These people are soft. | ||
| They don't even use dogs. | ||
| I don't know what it is, but so much stuff... | ||
| There's always something that violates all your expectations. | ||
| And to the answer, do state fish and game agencies do their job? | ||
| I have... | ||
| No one has complete faith in everything. | ||
| But in general, I have a lot of faith in state fish and game agencies. | ||
| And you guys have all had the luxury, like I have to travel around the world a fair bit. | ||
| And I used to have this naive idea that you'd go to a developing nation. | ||
| And it would be that you'd experience this great abundance of wildlife. | ||
| It's just in your mind, it's like, oh, it's like back in time somehow. | ||
| You know, I remember like the first time I went to the Philippines to do a magazine story, I brought my snorkel, my mask, and I thought it would just be this explosion of sea life. | ||
| You know, but in fact it's not because they use cyanide to fish on the reefs. | ||
|
unidentified
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Whoa! | |
| And dynamite. | ||
| You go to a fish market there and the fish are an inch long tops. | ||
| It's either there's a bunch of inch long fish or they've just drug in a big whale shark and they're hacking an apartment machetes. | ||
| Whoa! | ||
| The reality is, is that the US, we have very progressive game management, and we have like a hunter-based management system. | ||
| In the US, when you factor in how many people live here, where we're at in a technological sense, where we're at in an economic sense, it almost doesn't make sense that we have the wildlife we have. | ||
| We do a phenomenal job, and there's a richness of wildlife in the United States of America that's unparalleled by any country in a similar situation. | ||
| And Steve, let me just piggyback... | ||
| There's nothing to compare to it. | ||
| Let me piggyback, and I don't want to interrupt you, but not only that... | ||
| But you did. | ||
| You fucked. | ||
| Well, the U.S. also has been really responsible for many, many years. | ||
| Also, if you want to buy timber from, say, Indonesia, our rules and guidelines for how that timber is harvested and where is incredibly stringent. | ||
| It's... | ||
| Countries like China and Japan that are not responsible, but keep going. | ||
| So, you're right. | ||
| No, you're absolutely right there, and we've had to use certain things to try to control other countries' abuse on the high seas. | ||
| Like, we'll even go after people and be like, not only are we going to not buy your fisheries, but now we have the capability to boycott your electronics if you're not going to get with the program of high seas fisheries management. | ||
| So, in general, in the U.S., I attribute... | ||
| It's starting to sound like a documentary, but I'm saying that the North American Wildlife Conservation Model, which is a model based on creating abundance, So that you can have a limited, sustainable harvest of resources has proven to be the best system and it's not even debatable. | ||
| And people don't understand that when they're in urban areas and they become animal rights activists and they talk about how much they love animals. | ||
| They don't understand things like keeping deer population down so you don't die in car accidents because they don't have natural predators. | ||
| Unless you're gonna go fucking like what they're doing with wolves and reintroduce wolves into your ecosystem and then what happens? | ||
| What are you gonna control the wolves? | ||
|
unidentified
|
How do they even do that? | |
| They're not funding research. | ||
| A guy that hunts and he buys firearms and ammunition, which has essentially a self-imposed exercise tax that was voted in by sportsmen. | ||
| They have a self-imposed exercise tax where money goes to the federal government. | ||
| It's a percentage that goes to the federal government, that purchase. | ||
| It's earmarked for wildlife conservation. | ||
| So you're talking about enforcement of laws, which I think Peter would agree with greatly, that somebody needs to enforce these laws. | ||
| That's how we're funding that enforcement. | ||
| Hunting license sales and Pittman Robertson Act funds. | ||
| Buying a hunting license goes to create state fish and game agencies. | ||
| Many of these agencies are self-sustaining. | ||
| They don't get any taxpayer funding. | ||
| Their funding comes through fees and licenses. | ||
| And they do wildlife research. | ||
| PETA's not funding wildlife research. | ||
| You know? | ||
| It's like they're just making noise. | ||
| But, like, the conversation so often comes down to PETA, but PETA's become a joke. | ||
| I mean, when PETA makes the news, it's always like, what are those guys up to now? | ||
| It's always the tone out. | ||
| I don't think they're taken seriously. | ||
| I don't think the animal... | ||
| I don't think that animal rights... | ||
| I don't think that people who self-identify as animal rights advocates are actually dangerous. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm going to disagree with you if we can snuggle and share a microphone here. | |
| There we go. | ||
| Because I think that PETA is the clown shoes of the animal rights movement, but they're there in a way to be a distraction for, like, the HSUS's of the world. | ||
| What does that mean? | ||
| Humane Society of the United States. | ||
| And everybody thinks that the Humane Society is your local dog and cat shelter, right? | ||
| But nationally, HSUS, the Humane Society of the United States, doesn't really fund your local animal shelter. | ||
| They try to raise money off of you thinking that they fund your local animal shelter, but instead, they're the non-clown-choose animal rights group. | ||
| They're the suit and tie-wearing, lobbying, go to politicians. | ||
| They know how to raise money. | ||
| They know how to be effective talking to politicians and banning certain types of hunting. | ||
| And Pete is there, I think, really to be that sort of distraction. | ||
| You know, oh look, it's the chicks who are getting naked and painting themselves like tigers. | ||
| It's the people who are wearing like the little lettuce bikinis. | ||
| But Michael Markarian or Wayne Pacelli at HSUS, their goal is the same. | ||
| I mean, Wayne Pacelli has said, we want to see a day when there is no hunting in this country. | ||
| Why do you need to hunt anymore? | ||
| You can go to the grocery store. | ||
| That's what's really insane is that someone would want to take away your ability to acquire meat your way. | ||
| That somehow or another it would be good to only be able to get your meat from farmers. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I think these folks want to get to a day where we're growing meat in laboratories and we've got our test tube vats. | |
| I think you're right. | ||
| But I think they don't understand that there would be this insane imbalance in the ecosystem that would probably lead to the rise of predators. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Absolutely. | |
| And not to mention the loss of humanity. | ||
| I mean, you know, there is something innately human about taking your food. | ||
| That I think we would lose if we grew our food in a laboratory. | ||
| Well, I think your definition of human is what they want to change. | ||
| I think what they want to change is they want us to evolve past this need to be reliant upon our primal instincts. | ||
| And my thinking on that is always I understand the idealistic or utopian sort of pull in that direction. | ||
| But there's also a reality about the time that we live in. | ||
| Although we can see a bright future where we become beings of light who can read each other's minds and the internet is used to travel on, maybe that's the future. | ||
| Maybe that's a million years from now, whatever the fuck it is. | ||
| But reality is right now, animals don't live forever and they're delicious when you eat them. | ||
| And you guys are getting crazy, okay? | ||
| You're not going to live forever. | ||
| Neither is that deer. | ||
| Neither is that cow. | ||
| Like, this is nuts. | ||
| Like, the idea that you shouldn't torture them, 100%, I'm with you. | ||
| The idea that you shouldn't psychologically damage them by leaving them in cages their whole life and then finally shooting them and eating them and... | ||
| Yeah, there's a lot of bad karma to that. | ||
| That would make me think that the people that would be the real animal activists would be the ones that want to encourage the natural food chain. | ||
| You're not going to stop people from eating meat. | ||
| You're just not. | ||
| We like it too much. | ||
| There's too much scientific evidence that there's benefits through cholesterol, for brain function. | ||
| Inflammation. | ||
| There's a lot of benefits of eating meat. | ||
| Vegans don't want to believe that because a lot of vegans, what their thing is, Is that they used to have an unbelievably shitty diet. | ||
| They used to eat fucking bullshit and cheeseburgers and shitty food and blah blah blah blah blah. | ||
| But now that they're eating vegan they feel so much better. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| And now they're like these proselytizing for the vegan religion. | ||
| And they're going around telling everybody how amazing it is. | ||
| How amazing they feel to be vegan. | ||
| But I'm like, I understand. | ||
| You're right. | ||
| There's a lot of great nutrients in vegetables. | ||
| But, and meat. | ||
| And meat, too. | ||
| There's a lot of good in that, too. | ||
| And I'm a person who never did, like, eat their body away. | ||
| I never did eat shit food all the time. | ||
| I understand the direct correlation between nutritional supplementation, eating healthy vegetables, eating good lean meats, and feeling better, and your body actually performing. | ||
| Especially in something, like, really intense. | ||
| When you get into, like, jiu-jitsu, any kind of martial art, The stakes of you being good or bad are you getting your ass kicked. | ||
| And that's a terrible feeling that every man wants to avoid. | ||
| And you understand what's working and what's not working. | ||
| Pragmatism comes into play when you're involved in anything, any competitive athletic, especially combat sports. | ||
| Like, you better eat the right shit. | ||
| You better take your fucking vitamin. | ||
| Because if you don't, it's a difference between you just You're barely getting out of a submission and getting to a dominant position and winning, or you're tapping out. | ||
| I mean, it literally sometimes is that close. | ||
| It's a few beats of a heart. | ||
| It's whether or not you have just that extra push of oxygen in your body. | ||
|
unidentified
|
People that do that, they like meat. | |
| Most of them. | ||
| Not only that, but if you look at nature, that's such a classic and stark example of how life eats life. | ||
| Life eats life, by the way, whether or not you're eating animals. | ||
| You're still killing living things. | ||
| This is the thing I've always wondered about, and I was actually... | ||
| Maybe I'm relying on the expertise of your viewers, and this isn't a question that they'd be able to answer through a format like Twitter. | ||
| It would take a lengthy email if someone knows. | ||
| Whatever you do, don't give out your email right now. | ||
| It's going to go to you, and then you're going to send it to me if it's good. | ||
| But whenever I ask this, people think that I'm trying to demonstrate absurdity by being absurd. | ||
| But it really is something I wonder about, and I'm sure there's a great answer for it. | ||
| In the mindset of a diehard animal rights person who feels that human life is equal to animal life, what do they propose we should do? | ||
| Once we conquer the problem of humans consuming animals, human-induced animal suffering, what do they propose? | ||
| Population control? | ||
| No, what will they do with the bottlenose dolphin? | ||
| How will it be that he... | ||
| Is forced to stop consuming fish. | ||
| And I'm not trying to be like a smartass. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Like, what will you do to get coyotes if life is life is life? | ||
| Okay. | ||
| When will they be offended by the actions of a coyote? | ||
| Who's killing things to survive? | ||
| I know it's like he has to, but really, if you caught them all and separated them, you'd be able to feed them a sort of... | ||
| I think that's a good question. | ||
| But I'm not trying to be a smartass. | ||
| What is the answer? | ||
| I think they make a very distinct difference, a big difference between humans and animals, right? | ||
| As far as they're concerned, there is a big difference because human beings have a choice. | ||
| Our choice, we could be herbivores and exclusively herbivores, and according to them, even healthier than meat eaters, which I disagree with. | ||
| I think everybody disagrees with that. | ||
| And I read the China study, everybody. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You didn't read the whole thing, by the way, either. | |
| I sure did. | ||
| Get the fuck out of here. | ||
| You know you didn't read that whole thing. | ||
| I'm going to quiz you on Chapter 8. The end is the best part, in fact. | ||
| Is that where Pinocchio gets his Geppetto out of the whale? | ||
| All you have to do is read the end, actually, because he talks about how industry hijacks the sort of – hijacks government agencies like the school lunch program and what the military feeds the soldiers into buying their food. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, yeah. | |
| And how they get scientists – they stack the deck and get scientists to say that 25 percent of you are fucking – Diet can be simple sugars because there's a lot of money in high fructose corn syrup for the corn refiners, etc. | ||
| Isn't it amazing though? | ||
| People don't understand how that happened. | ||
| How all of a sudden the government gives farmers money to give them subsidies on corn to encourage the growth of corn. | ||
| And it's not family farms, remember everybody. | ||
| It's huge industrial farms that get the bulk And somehow or another they wash each other's hands and figure out how to slap each other in the back. | ||
| They stack the deck. | ||
| T. Colin Campbell, he was a scientist on one of these boards. | ||
| He does a very good job as a scientist who is involved in this stuff. | ||
| And he names names because he's friends with these guys who are on Nestle and Coca-Cola's boards who say, guess what? | ||
| Soda, high fructose corn syrup, has nothing to do with obesity. | ||
| You can eat as much as you want. | ||
| In fact, 25% of the food and nutrition board that sets the standard for the school lunch program of mothers with dependent children, etc. | ||
| You can eat 25% of your diet can be simple sugars. | ||
| Go ahead! | ||
| Listen to what Monsanto has done. | ||
| Monsanto has bought up a company that was the leading company on bee research because those are the people that said that Monsanto's pesticides and all the shit that's in their food is causing bee populations to decline. | ||
| So Monsanto buys them. | ||
| Then Monsanto develops a fucking robot bee. | ||
| I joked around about it in my act. | ||
| I said that bees are such cunty animals. | ||
| I hope that we make solar-powered robot bees that fuel themselves by... | ||
| They have dicks that are actually vacuum cleaners and they just fuck real bees to death and suck their life out and burn it inside their combustion engine. | ||
| And I was just joking around. | ||
| I didn't think anybody would actually make a robot bee, but I was like, how tough is it to pollinate a fucking plant? | ||
| They don't even know they're doing it and they're doing it. | ||
| All I know is Monsanto stealing your material. | ||
| Well, they just thought about it. | ||
| I bet they thought about it before me. | ||
| But it takes a long time to develop a fucking drone bee. | ||
| A robot bee, yeah. | ||
| But they have a robot bee. | ||
| Monsanto has fucking robot bees now. | ||
| Pull up a picture of it. | ||
| Pull up a picture of it. | ||
| Monsanto robot bee is in the news today. | ||
| Along with that fucking explosion in Boston. | ||
| How scary is that shit? | ||
| Is there any new evidence on that? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| We should probably know, huh? | ||
| Let's see. | ||
|
unidentified
|
A kid died. | |
| An eight-year-old kid. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Do they know? | ||
| Was it like a sophisticated form? | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| I think it looks like it's a fire and it looks like there was ball bearings in it. | ||
| So it looks like it's probably just like one of those ones you find out online. | ||
| Like a domestic produced. | ||
| This is unbelievably horrific. | ||
| 141 people have been injured. | ||
| 141. And at least 37, or at least 17 rather, are critical injuries. | ||
| Doctors are pulling ball bearings out of people. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| No, Monsanto. | ||
| Monsanto Robot B. You know, that scares me. | ||
| They're going to come up with wasps that can sting the shit out of you. | ||
| See that thing? | ||
| That's the one with the quarter? | ||
| The one right next to it with the quarter? | ||
| Look at that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What the fuck happened? | |
| I don't know. | ||
| The one up in the upper right, that one right there. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| Look at that fucking thing. | ||
| That is Monsanto's robot bee. | ||
| And that thing is going to have the same function that an actual bee does. | ||
| Like, they'll be able to get them to fly back and forth and pollinate plants. | ||
| What? | ||
| Oh yeah, we killed off the bees, don't worry. | ||
| We got Terminator bees that we developed specifically. | ||
| It's like, don't sweat it, dude. | ||
| And by the way, Monsanto owns the copyright on these, and nobody else can make their own robot bees, so you're going to have to buy robot bees from Monsanto. | ||
| And like a real bee, they only last like a week. | ||
| You know, there was a... | ||
| In the 1800s, there was this... | ||
| There was a... | ||
| My mind's escaping me. | ||
| What's the guy who, like, one who studies plants? | ||
| A botanist. | ||
| Yeah, okay, yeah. | ||
| There's a botanist who was... | ||
| Herbologist? | ||
| Yeah, a botanist. | ||
| A forest. | ||
| Was making, like, an exploration of the American West, and he was talking about, and he wrote for a while about the advance of the honeybee. | ||
| You know, the honeybee's not a native, not native to this continent. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah, he's talking about the advance of honeybees across the continent. | ||
| So did it come on ships? | ||
| Well, you know, people brought it. | ||
| Oh, they brought it on purpose? | ||
| Yeah, like, again, I'm escaping, like, not an aviary, but an apiary. | ||
| People brought them for honey production. | ||
| And they went feral very successfully. | ||
| And he was, and this botanist describes, and he made his trip, like, you know what I remember? | ||
| He made his trip in 1811 because his getting home was interrupted by the War of 1812. And he was on the Missouri when that great earthquake happened. | ||
| The earthquake struck that actually switched the direction of the Mississippi's flow. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Whoa. | |
| Yeah, he was there, and then he got delayed by the War of 1812. That guy's shit luck. | ||
| This guy had Bradbury. | ||
| Bradbury was his name, like the novelist. | ||
| His name was Bradbury. | ||
| He had amazingly bad luck. | ||
| He thought he was just going on a little trip, and it took him like seven years to get home. | ||
| And all the material that Bradbury, all the material he gathered, like all the plant specimens he took, He got done and he wanted to take a different route home, so he sent his assistant. | ||
| Home with his stuff, right? | ||
| But his assistant gets home years earlier, and by the time this dude makes it back home, the assistant has published all the material under his own name. | ||
| No! | ||
| But anyways, in this book, he has this really interesting passage. | ||
| Son of a bitch. | ||
| This really interesting passage about how fast bees are advancing and how they always keep pace. | ||
| They're always out ahead of the frontier. | ||
| So at the time when he was writing, he was talking about like the... | ||
| Bees somewhere in North Dakota or whatever be saying, like, reliably, you know, we're in St. Louis in a strong way, and bees are 40 miles out, and the bees will continue to march across. | ||
| That's why, like, colony... | ||
| Collapse disorder, as interesting as it is, I don't think of it as a wildlife issue. | ||
| I think of it as an agricultural issue. | ||
| Right, because they're not natural. | ||
| Yeah, it's a non-native species. | ||
| It's an agricultural problem, and it's a sad agricultural problem. | ||
| But when I think of wildlife politics and the well-being of American wildlife, which I have a vested interest in, I don't look at colony collapse disorder as... | ||
| It's a serious economic problem. | ||
| So these animals, or these bees rather, if they didn't exist, if they hadn't been introduced here, would agriculture be drastically different? | ||
| Yeah, I would say so, because they're able to use them in such a targeted... | ||
| A guy that raises bees is doing two things. | ||
| He's producing honey, and he's providing pollination services. | ||
| So they do these things in tandem. | ||
| When I was in college, I worked for a beekeeper, and he would... | ||
| All the while, he's collecting honeycomb, but at the same time, he's moving stuff around. | ||
| So at the beginning of the year, he'd go down to Georgia, he'd truck his bees down to Georgia, and he'd do pollination services down there. | ||
| And I think that it's just a way that you can do very targeted, very fast, synchronized pollination of plant species that if you were relying on native species of bees and native moths and butterflies, that I gather would take much longer. | ||
| What are the native ones as opposed to the honeybees are not native? | ||
| Honeybees are not native. | ||
| So the North American Indians, they never got any honey before we came along? | ||
| Well, I think that the honeybee produces good quantities of a high quality honey. | ||
| There are similar products produced. | ||
| There are similar things produced by other things. | ||
| But it's kind of like the reason that goat's milk isn't really... | ||
| A big, strong product, but cows can crank it out. | ||
| In that way, they were brought for that purpose. | ||
| But there are many pollinating insects that were native to the U.S., but the specific honeybee as we know it was an introduced species. | ||
| Wasps, were they here? | ||
| I don't know, but I would... | ||
| I'm sure they were. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'd like to be the son of a bitch who introduced wasps to the United States. | |
| Who decided, you know what, bees, they make honey. | ||
| What happens if we bring wasps over here? | ||
| That guy from Animal Planet. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Screw that guy. | |
| He had a short-lived show on Animal Planet, and he was an entomologist, and he was a really weird dude. | ||
| And he goes, look at this! | ||
| And he had this huge spider, and he goes, watch this! | ||
| And he put it in his mouth, and then he pulled it out. | ||
| It was this huge tarantula. | ||
| Now it won't bite me because I'm not a moth. | ||
| If I was a moth, it would bite me. | ||
| But I'm a human, so it doesn't know the difference. | ||
| I'm like, alright, it's some Filipino thing, right? | ||
| So I said, his claim to fame is he'd been stung by every insect. | ||
| And I said, there are some wasps out there that can hurt you. | ||
| And he said, oh yes, oh yes. | ||
| And I said, like what? | ||
| He goes, well, the tarantula hawk or the 24-hour ant that you find in Panama, if they sting you, you'll fall to the ground and scream for hours and hours. | ||
| He goes, they call it a 24-hour because when you do get stung, you can't sleep, you can't drink, you can't eat for 24 hours. | ||
| The pain is so intense. | ||
| I said, what was the pain like? | ||
| He goes, I liken it to getting your hand slammed in a car door and being shot with a.45 at the same time. | ||
| He was this really weird guy. | ||
| I was like, well, I'll be staying away from the tarantula hawk, which is indigenous to this area, Nevada, Utah. | ||
| Whenever you talk about any of the really evil fucking bugs in this world. | ||
| They scare the shit out of you. | ||
| You want to scare me? | ||
| That really drives me nuts about animal rights activists, because those are animals too. | ||
| This is a whole broad ecosystem, and a lot of these things that are out there, we can't live with them. | ||
| If we live with them, they kill us. | ||
| Like, do you understand that there's ants in Africa that kill elephants? | ||
| They climb up an elephant's leg, and they go right through the fucking ear, and they start eating the elephant ear first. | ||
| Fuck yeah, it's true. | ||
| They find them, and then they communicate with the other ants in their evil cunt colony, and they find this poor fucking elephant, and they climb up, and they eat him ears first. | ||
| Did you, you must have, if you're a cunt thing, because you know those guys, my boys in San Antonio who made this big promotional video for me that said, no cunts. | ||
| You're coming to Brian Gallant, that squad. | ||
| You cunt his show. | ||
| No cunts, please. | ||
| Is that from you? | ||
| Is that your, uh... | ||
| Yeah, no. | ||
| I mean, I think that's the number one problem with human beings. | ||
| The number one problem. | ||
| We eliminated cunts. | ||
| All cunts. | ||
| Male cunts, by the way. | ||
| There's a tarantula hawk. | ||
| Show them that. | ||
| How about that? | ||
| You want to get stung by that, motherfucker? | ||
| They actually catch tarantulas, though. | ||
| Yeah, they do. | ||
| And drag them home, man. | ||
| What a monster. | ||
| Flying monster. | ||
| I'm peeing out of my dick. | ||
| Go ahead. | ||
| My point is that if we eliminated that from the world, and everyone left had to figure things out, I think, magically, 99% of the world's problems would immediately be eradicated. | ||
| I really do believe that. | ||
| I think most of the world's problems, whether it's crazy, out-of-control bankers that are fucking stealing resources and robbing this country blind, or whether it's evil, corrupt politicians, or whether it's, you know, whatever it is. | ||
| You get, cut all the cunty human beings out of that equation, And new resolutions automatically begin to show themselves and people automatically begin to try to find ways to work together and stop environmental devastations and figure out how to be profitable while still being ethical. | ||
| It's a cunt issue. | ||
| We have like this huge civilization issue that's really a cunt issue. | ||
| But if you ask them all to line up, you won't have people who self-identify. | ||
| No, no, of course not. | ||
| So you need a really good court system. | ||
| Or mushrooms. | ||
| Or just you do it. | ||
| Mushrooms would help. | ||
| You know, what people need to do is, your ego can convince you of some pretty horrible shit. | ||
| Because we're in this, we're sort of a species that's in a stage. | ||
| We're in a stage of not quite being animals, being self-aware, having the ability to communicate. | ||
| Not really being completely fully, wholly enlightened. | ||
| And there's a lot of things that slow us down along that way to being completely, wholly enlightened and enjoying this experience as brothers and sisters. | ||
| And the problem is people that don't get life right. | ||
| Whether it's genetic, whether it's behavioral because of their environment and the conditioning that they experienced growing up, whatever it is. | ||
| Those people that don't quite get life right and are just fucking insulting and stupid and annoying and constantly creating their own issues, constantly causing problems so that they have some sort of motivation to get through their daily day. | ||
| That's a big percentage of human beings. | ||
| It's a complex organism that doesn't come with a direction manual. | ||
| So a lot of people fuck it up. | ||
| And you develop from the ground up and you do a shit job. | ||
| And it's addicted to drugs. | ||
| And it's stopping that with these drugs. | ||
| And you're filling these holes. | ||
| And you're cutting off. | ||
| You've got to have something that allows you to see if it's possible. | ||
| Some people it's not possible. | ||
| Some people are so psychologically damaged by the time they become an adult. | ||
| There's almost nothing you can do for them. | ||
| But if someone did have enough sense to just stand back and look at their life as if they were trying to give themselves advice. | ||
| How would you give yourself advice? | ||
| Have you met you and you saw your issues? | ||
| What would you say? | ||
| I'd give myself advice. | ||
| It's a great move. | ||
| Do you? | ||
| All the time? | ||
| All the time, man. | ||
| Great move. | ||
| I think some of it comes also from... | ||
| There's something in a human being... | ||
| Somebody once said, this scientist was saying, if you got rid of all the ants on the planet, the Earth would last five years. | ||
| In other words, all the other animals would die in five years for a whole bunch of reasons, because it's part of the ecosystem. | ||
| If you got rid of all humans, animals and everything else would be just fine. | ||
| It would flourish. | ||
| That is an interesting thing to say. | ||
| I thought about that because I thought a lot of people, when you couch it in those terms, and I think as a human being you kind of grow up knowing in some ways that we are somehow a burden to the ecosystem. | ||
| We are a burden to this world, the natural world, and it's something we have to steward properly. | ||
| There's a built-in sense as a human being that in some ways you are a bit of an intruder, an interruption, and a burden to that which is life-sustaining. | ||
| I always think, even now... | ||
| Boy, that's so personal, man. | ||
| I don't agree with that at all. | ||
| I'm not saying that I agree. | ||
| I'm just saying I think that is part of the human psyche and always has been. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really? | |
| I think so. | ||
| I think especially now. | ||
| Man, I don't think so. | ||
| I think that's where conservation movements and PETA and things come from. | ||
| I'm gonna piss while I disagree with you. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| You gotta pull yourself out of the hole. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Did you hear about this? | |
| The Newton families from the victims of the school shooting were in the last mile of the... | ||
|
unidentified
|
It was dedicated to the last mile was dedicated to them. | |
| So that's where they were all sitting. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And that's where all the bombs went off. | |
| No. | ||
| Yeah, so that's a conspiracy going on. | ||
| Were any of those individuals injured? | ||
| Well, I'm not sure because they're not saying who's been injured. | ||
| As if they haven't suffered enough, man. | ||
| I got kids that age. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And that's something that, I guess that would have been public information, huh? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Where those people were. | ||
| Yeah, because they, I guess they, they, it actually, there's like, there's a, I'm trying to find a video, right, or a photo of it, but there's actually people taking photos in front of it, like the families and stuff like that before it happened. | ||
|
unidentified
|
So weird, man. | |
| Here we go. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, check this out. | |
| It's on hollywoodlife.com and there's photos of them sitting right there. | ||
|
unidentified
|
The last mile. | |
| Shit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's crazy. | |
| I just gotta say that was one of the most satisfying pisses I've ever had in my life. | ||
| Congratulations, my friend. | ||
| Something about taking leaks. | ||
| What is that? | ||
| The school shooters were sitting in the last mile of the Boston Marathon from Newton. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| And so, did they get hurt? | ||
| Probably, but they haven't said who's gotten hurt, though. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| Some things suck. | ||
| What the fuck? | ||
| This whole thing is terrifying. | ||
| CNN, don't go to CNN, folks. | ||
| Don't even go look at the front page. | ||
| It's horrific. | ||
| There's blood everywhere. | ||
| It's a cunt problem. | ||
| It's a cunt problem. | ||
| That's a cunt problem. | ||
| I mean, there's obviously simplifying things to the extreme. | ||
| There's some cunt out there. | ||
| Don't send me Twitter messages. | ||
| I know what I'm doing. | ||
| I know what you're saying. | ||
| You're absolutely right. | ||
| I agree with you, but that's obviously missing the point. | ||
| You know, human beings, man. | ||
| But capable of amazing shit, you know? | ||
| I've always said that we can figure out how to get people to everyone get their shit together. | ||
| We are the bipolar ape. | ||
| We are the most bipolar ape. | ||
| Yeah, but I don't think it's important. | ||
| I mean, I don't think it's necessary for our survival. | ||
| I don't think we have to be shitty in order to move forward. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| I think that's like the old days back when we didn't have technology. | ||
| I think that's the case. | ||
| One of the things that puts it into perspective is that a couple thousand years ago, if someone showed up on your shore, those fucking people were dangerous and you had to kill them. | ||
| You were probably going to get raped and pillaged. | ||
| And sold into slavery. | ||
| Now you welcome them as an important part of the tourism industry. | ||
| That's a completely new development in human history. | ||
| You have fucking Rosetta Stone so you can figure out what the hell they were saying. | ||
| It's so true, man. | ||
| So much of the world, up until literally 300 years ago, less, less, what am I talking about? | ||
| 150 years ago, was in servitude of some kind and usually a form of slavery. | ||
| Well, what's really trippy is to see North Korea still rocking it old school today. | ||
| Still rocking a full formal dictatorship. | ||
| I can't figure out what's going to happen. | ||
| In some way, it seems... | ||
| The state department and the military is like, what do you do with these guys? | ||
| On the other hand, the other half of it seems like serious. | ||
| I can't tell. | ||
| Is it not serious or serious? | ||
| Well, it's bluster. | ||
| North Korea is always bluster. | ||
| However, the problem is this kid is 29, maybe 30. They don't know a lot about him. | ||
| And they're not sure... | ||
| You're talking about the ruler of North Korea, the son of... | ||
| Yeah, John Il now, or whatever I think his name is. | ||
| They don't know... | ||
| Yeah, they don't know enough about him. | ||
| And it used to be his father, there was a method to his father's madness. | ||
| He would create a lot of heat to bring people to the negotiating table to get more aid or whatever. | ||
| This kid is, they think, probably rattling his sword to get the respect of the ancient generals that actually run that fucking country. | ||
| We need to bring Dennis Rodman back. | ||
| You're right, and I'm glad you brought that up. | ||
| And bring that dude to his senses. | ||
| Dennis, what'd you think of North Korea? | ||
| When you have Dennis Rodman in your council, why doesn't he bring Dennis Rodman in and would the United States hook it up and just provide him with a thousand Korean chicks and just let him run it? | ||
| Let him run that thing. | ||
| We need him in that gene pool anyway. | ||
| Could you imagine if the North Koreans love Dennis Rodman so much that they let him become their king? | ||
| And then somehow in some strange world he goes over there and then all of a sudden he starts giving press conferences that Dennis Rodman is now running North Korea. | ||
| Dennis Rodman. | ||
| Dennis Rodman for president of North Korea. | ||
| Listen, man, it's not outside the realm of possibility. | ||
| How many steps removed from that is Arnold Schwarzenegger running California? | ||
| How many steps removed? | ||
| It's only a few chapters of ridiculous parody. | ||
| Minnesota had a toy governor for a while. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Listen, I was a Navy SEAL and I know about chemtrails and thermite. | |
| You can't say he was a pro wrestler. | ||
| Yes, he was. | ||
| And a Navy SEAL medic. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And, you know... | ||
| And a huge man. | ||
| And a conspiracy theorist to the extreme. | ||
| Yeah, he's got that show called Conspiracy Theory, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| He's always looking for thermite. | ||
| Does the leader... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Thermite. | |
| Does the leader... | ||
| Kim Il-yung-un? | ||
| Please say it correctly. | ||
| Please say it correctly. | ||
| I don't know how I would. | ||
| Please say our dear leader. | ||
| Isn't it horrible? | ||
| It's so American to not be able to... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Kim Jong-un. | |
| Kim Jong-un. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He's such a dick. | |
| Is that exactly what I'm saying? | ||
| But does he have... | ||
| Does he have the legal... | ||
| What passes for legal authority to commit forces the same way that the US president could commit forces for 60 or 70 days? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| They declared war on South Korea, though. | ||
| Well, he's essentially a dictator. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Well, the Korean War never actually ended. | |
| I mean, it's just the state of justice. | ||
| They've always been in the state of He's essentially a dictator, right? | ||
| So, I mean... | ||
| But is he like the Iranian president who is really like... | ||
| He's very different. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He's like a godhead. | |
| I mean, he's a godhead of state. | ||
| He's a religious figure. | ||
| The North Koreans have been indoctrinated. | ||
| For example, every North Korean home, from what I understand, has a speaker. | ||
| And when the dear leader would speak, it would blast in your home and you had to memorize that speech. | ||
| Oh, Jesus. | ||
| Man, if I had one of those and I could make everybody do that... | ||
| What would you speech be around? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't know. | |
| I'd think of something good, though, man. | ||
| It's like... | ||
| What would you say if you could say something to everybody? | ||
| An overcooked diver duck. | ||
| People would be like, what the fuck is our dear leader talking about? | ||
| Overcooked diver duck. | ||
| There it is. | ||
| I might just tell people sugar's bad. | ||
| Mmm, so delicious, though. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, it is. | |
| That's the problem. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I know these cupcakes aren't good for you, but goddamn it here, Squibb. | |
| You've got to eat enough good food that you could do this though. | ||
| That's the balance to life. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I agree. | |
| The balance to life is kale shakes and cupcakes. | ||
| Kale shakes and cupcakes. | ||
| You've got to be able to work them all together. | ||
| That should be a fucking t-shirt. | ||
| Kale shakes and cupcakes. | ||
| It's important, man. | ||
| Delicious food, passion, a little wine. | ||
| Yep, I love wine. | ||
| It's important. | ||
| Hey, we've got to drink some good wine. | ||
| And you pay since you're richer than I am. | ||
| Okay, I'll do it. | ||
| I don't give a fuck. | ||
| I love Joe Rogan. | ||
| Joe Rogan is the greatest. | ||
| We go to dinner one time, and I was like, I've been reading about wine, so I looked at the list, and I was like, I'm going to choose. | ||
| Ah, yes, we'll get the right Bank Bordeaux here. | ||
| And I'm asking questions. | ||
| And Rogan goes, hey, hey, fuckface, let me show you the Joe Rogan way of ordering wine. | ||
| He goes, oh, that's expensive as shit. | ||
| We'll get that one. | ||
| You're ruining everything! | ||
| I'm trying to impress people. | ||
| I'm like, no way! | ||
| Brian would pretend to understand. | ||
| See, one of the reasons why I have very little tolerance with you when it comes to that is that I have my other good friend, Matt Lichtenberg, who's a huge wine fanatic. | ||
| Legit. | ||
| The guy has a fucking crazy wine cellar, temperature-controlled in his house. | ||
| Ancient wines and shit and all these important ones. | ||
| That motherfucker knows wine. | ||
| You don't know what you're talking about. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't like shit. | |
| I don't like shit. | ||
| I can call Matt up and go, hey, Matt, I go, this is my choices. | ||
| You know, a Bordeaux from blah, blah, blah, or a blah, blah, blah. | ||
| And he'll tell you, well, Oregon in 2007 is the shit. | ||
| If you can get a Pinot from Oregon for 2007 and it's this particular vineyard, he just knows. | ||
| He's a legit wine connoisseur. | ||
| I went to his birthday party. | ||
| And they had this really nutty dinner where they gave what they call flights of wine. | ||
| Yeah, I know about that stuff. | ||
| Yeah, and they were all like drinking it and describing the earthy tones. | ||
| And this one is oak and this one. | ||
| That's my favorite thing to do. | ||
| I'll do that all day. | ||
| All day. | ||
| I will do it. | ||
| I'll sit there and I love pretending. | ||
| I love it. | ||
| I'll wear a tweed jacket. | ||
| I'll wear a scarf. | ||
| I would definitely wear a scarf. | ||
| What I'm thinking of is the vertical. | ||
| There's a vertical and a horizontal flight. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| A vertical flight would be... | ||
| A horizontal flight would be where you take a year and you go to all the great Bordeauxs and you get their Bordeaux from that year. | ||
| It's a horizontal flight. | ||
| A vertical flight is you take a specific vineyard and you collect all the years from that specific vineyard. | ||
| So you might host a vertical and it's like... | ||
| Chateau whatever, 1920 to 1945, and you're going to taste a 25-year span out of that production. | ||
| The reason I know this, and I want to do a shameless plug, my buddy Ben Wallace has this great book, The Billionaire's Vinegar, and it's about the most expensive bottle of wine ever sold, but what is good wine? | ||
| Do we know good wine when we taste it? | ||
| It's fascinating. | ||
| Well, if you get really old shit, most likely it's not good anymore, right? | ||
| Well, the problem is, as his book explains, is the problem is The most expensive bottle of wine ever sold wound up being fraudulent, but it was purported to be owned by Thomas Jefferson. | ||
| Steve Forbes owned it for a while and all these different guys owned this bottle of wine. | ||
| One of the Koch brothers owned it for a while. | ||
| And in the end, there's no one around who can go, I've had a lot of wine from that year. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And that's right on the money. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's true. | |
| Isn't it crazy, though, that these different rich guys had the wine and sold it to each other? | ||
| Like, they passed it off. | ||
| You know what Forbes did? | ||
| Forbes stored it in a... | ||
| They put it in their corporate headquarters, and they had it in a box, like a glass-lit box as a decoration, but they had it standing upright with a heat lamp in there or a lamp. | ||
| Oh, no! | ||
|
unidentified
|
And it dried that cork out, and the cork fell into the bottle. | |
| So later, when people were trying to analyze what was in it, They can never rule out the intrusion of foreign substances, which will not allow them to find out what it was. | ||
| The guy who created the hoax would take really good wine and do weird stuff to it. | ||
| Like he'd put a little bit of vanilla extract in there. | ||
| Or he'd put some dirt from his gutter in there. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Just weird things he could do to kind of throw people. | |
| And then guys that are big swinging dicks about wine would taste it and be like, oh yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| It's so great. | ||
| It's a brilliant book, man. | ||
| It's such a pretentious fucking thing. | ||
| I love it! | ||
| I got invited by a huge guy who owned a paparazzi company, and he invited me to a wine tasting. | ||
| And he goes, I don't want, you can't really, he was trying to be really nice to me, he goes, I'm going to bring wine from my cellar for you. | ||
| I said, I'll buy some wine. | ||
| He goes, I don't want to be a dick to you, but you can't afford the wines we're going to bring. | ||
| And I go, alright, geez. | ||
| So how much was the most expensive wine you brought? | ||
| Literally, I was drinking 1961 Stony Hills. | ||
| I mean, I was drinking wines that would cost you $2,000 to drink. | ||
| The taster for Zaki's wine, the guy who sets the standard, was there. | ||
| So anyway, I go there and I'm drinking crazy. | ||
| 1960, 1963, 1964. What is it like? | ||
| What is it like? | ||
| Well, for me, because I love wine so much, there is a difference. | ||
| Now, here's the thing. | ||
| If you spend $300 on a bottle of wine, there's a big difference. | ||
| You're going to taste an amazing wine if you know what to get versus a $50 bottle of wine. | ||
| However, the difference between $300 and $1,000, I don't think... | ||
| There's no difference. | ||
| Now you're talking about scarcity. | ||
| Now you're going into years and there's one left and stuff. | ||
| I want to back up, though, because I want to clarify. | ||
| It's too easy to hack on wine connoisseurs. | ||
| I do want to say this. | ||
| The handful of times someone did present to me what's critically regarded as a good wine, I was able to taste that wine and say... | ||
| I get what you're saying. | ||
| There's something going on here that was not going on in all the other wine I've had my whole life. | ||
| It's wasted on me. | ||
| It's wasted on me, but I recognize what you're saying. | ||
| There's something going on here. | ||
| I don't think it's all smoke and mirrors. | ||
| It's not all BS at all. | ||
| No, it's definitely not all BS, and it's amazing the subtle differences in different glasses of wine. | ||
| And I always equate it to this. | ||
| Like, if I drink an amazing bottle of wine, like, say, 500 or whatever, like, my friend made a fortune, and he's a huge wine guy like your buddy, I always describe it this way. | ||
| I go, when I drink an amazing glass of wine, I say to him, I, I, the way I, the reason it's expensive, I go, nothing else tastes like that. | ||
| That, that taste, that experience stands on its own. | ||
| You don't, you can go, oh, it tastes just like this. | ||
| No. | ||
| It stands on its own. | ||
| It's so complex. | ||
| And it's an experience. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| For me, I love it. | ||
| If you had to choose, though, if you had to choose between no wine for the rest of your life or bland food, what is more important? | ||
| The taste of food or the taste of wine? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I gotta go with food. | |
| 100%, right? | ||
| I can live without wine, no problem. | ||
| Yeah, I gotta go with food. | ||
| I don't need wine. | ||
| I like it. | ||
| Yeah, when I'm eating very high-quality, good food that I won't have again, I typically... | ||
| I like to eat it with water. | ||
| Yeah, me too. | ||
| Sometimes you have food that's so good, like I was just in Louisiana this weekend and I went to this restaurant called Revolution. | ||
| I had a gnocchi, a lobster gnocchi. | ||
| I don't like the way you say gnocchi. | ||
| I don't like the way you say Afghanistan. | ||
| I don't like any of that. | ||
| At least I didn't say Norlins. | ||
| I'm not supporting you in any of these endeavors. | ||
| I was in Norlins. | ||
| I had a crawfish. | ||
| Etouffee. | ||
| Etouffee. | ||
| Crawfish etouffee. | ||
| Etouffee. | ||
| It's like you're giving a nod toward, yeah, I like it. | ||
| I'm not going to start doing it, but you're kind of saying, yeah, man, there's more to the earth. | ||
| There's more to the globe. | ||
| No. | ||
| Now they're gonna demonstrate this by having crazy pronunciation. | ||
| To me, it's like the gold chains of language. | ||
| He just showed up with a bunch of fucking language gold chains. | ||
| I was in Bahrain. | ||
| We spent time in France. | ||
| There was a little bit of work done in Afghanistan where they were perpetrating Taliban. | ||
|
unidentified
|
When I was visiting Chile, we... | |
| I say Steve Rinella. | ||
| Steve Rinella. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You know Steve Rinella, my friend Steve Rinella. | |
| His family's had good rabbit. | ||
| But really good food is another thing that's transcendental, man. | ||
| Yeah, I don't need good wine, but I do need good food. | ||
| It's the experience. | ||
| We were talking about your friend that doesn't like food. | ||
| I have a friend who's just like that too. | ||
| He's like, I just want to eat and then get done and then do my thing. | ||
| It's like, man, I get it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
But maybe he just tastes things different than I do. | |
| It has to be. | ||
| Some people like shit and other people hate it. | ||
| Like, I love sea urchin. | ||
| I think it tastes delicious. | ||
| I do too. | ||
| But I've tried to give people sea urchin and they're like, this is disgusting. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| Like, they spit it into a napkin like, oh! | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I like it. | ||
| Some people make a monastic decision. | ||
| They're kind of like, you know, with all the human suffering in the world or whatever, it's like, you know, I don't want to be a glutton in that way. | ||
| I look at it differently. | ||
| I look at it as, I have the opportunity to eat incredible food. | ||
| I'm going to eat this for the people that can't eat. | ||
| And I'm going to pay attention to it. | ||
| In support of all the suffering people, I'm going to enjoy this meal. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I do. | |
| Yeah, as long as you're not victimizing someone and you're enjoying that food, you should just be enjoying that food. | ||
| Enjoy that moment. | ||
| The idea that human beings have to be in perspective of six billion other fucking people is so crazy. | ||
| Because otherwise you'll never be happy. | ||
| You'll never be happy because the world is filled with suffering. | ||
| I mean, there's always tragic instances happening all over the world where people get hit in the head by coconuts, okay? | ||
| You should not be eating and enjoying your steak because some poor farmer got hit in the head with a coconut and fucking died. | ||
| Because that shit happens 150 times a year. | ||
| Right, and not only that, but what about the fact that people who can really cook, that's an art form. | ||
| Fuck yeah, it is. | ||
| They dedicate their life to it, and it makes your life... | ||
| It just makes the world a better place. | ||
| I don't want to live in a world with bad... | ||
| With bad food or food to where people don't take care of. | ||
| Yeah, you do. | ||
| You'd rather live in that world than not be alive. | ||
| Someone said, alright, no good food. | ||
| You don't know me, Joe. | ||
| No good food, but also no zombies or good food and zombies. | ||
| I want zombies so I can have an arsenal. | ||
| You could have an arsenal. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Can you imagine what Pigman and Nugent would do if we had good food and zombies in this world? | |
| Oh man, it would be the greatest show ever. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Can you imagine? | |
| The television special? | ||
| On Twitter the other day, the best show ever would be a combination of The Walking Dead and Duck Dynasty. | ||
| These dudes, they go out, they're doing their fucking wacky stunts, like pretending, well, I couldn't open the door, so I called Bob. | ||
| This fake scenario, and then all of a sudden, they all get eaten by zombies. | ||
| Just rip their fucking throats out as they're filming that shitty show. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And they eat their beard. | |
| And they choke and die. | ||
| Blood and brains mixed in with beard and they're trying to choke it down and throwing up. | ||
| Zombies throw up because they can't eat their beard. | ||
| You know, one of the first TV meetings I ever had was years ago now. | ||
| I think it was 2004. I had a TV meeting where... | ||
| A guy, in an aside, explained to me the most brilliant show that he was doing, but I don't think it ever happened. | ||
| And it was going to be... | ||
| He was pitching around a show that was going to be... | ||
| It was going to start like a reality show where you make everybody go live in a house. | ||
| And you foment the typical interpersonal conflict. | ||
| And as it would go on... | ||
| Things would start getting so unusual. | ||
| He was already like, right when reality TV was starting, he was already trying to think of what he was ahead of his time. | ||
| He was already thinking like how to toy with it. | ||
| And he wanted to have it get like increasingly outrageous to build up where people would say like, there's no way, there's no way. | ||
| And he wanted to bring it to the point where there was a murder. | ||
| You know? | ||
| And then there'd be a murder, and then the people in the reality show would be trying to, like, hide the fact that they killed one of the roommates. | ||
| And it would make this, like, very gradual segue into drama. | ||
| And I was like, that is the most genius thing. | ||
| But I don't think he ever... | ||
| Was he trying for an actual real murder? | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| He was just going to do... | ||
| He was going to fake it. | ||
| A scripted reality show. | ||
| He was going to have a scripted reality show that viewers would... | ||
| The way viewers don't really understand that reality shows are cast and scripted. | ||
| He was going to toy with this idea when it was starting to happen. | ||
| A real world to MTV real world type thing. | ||
| But build it and as he lost... | ||
| As he courted, like, an incredulous response in his viewership, being like, there's no way, there's no way, they didn't do that, that didn't happen, to, like, push it so far that the final tipping point would be that they actually kill somebody. | ||
| In the house. | ||
| But they don't really kill someone in the house. | ||
| It's just bullshit. | ||
| At that point it jumped to being like, we've been messing with you the whole time. | ||
| This is all just us playing with you. | ||
| That's Duck Dynasty. | ||
| That's what I'm talking about. | ||
| That's the fucking show. | ||
| Maybe that was the guy. | ||
| I just never heard anything about beards. | ||
| He figured out how to dress it up in beards. | ||
| They look like ZZ Top. | ||
| I love ZZ Top. | ||
| Listen, we've got to wrap this bitch up and bring it home. | ||
| This has been a lot of fun. | ||
| Cam, thanks for coming on, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Absolutely. | |
| Sorry you had to share a microphone, but this is a really low-tech fucking studio. | ||
| I need to get my act together. | ||
| This is the most people we've ever had on microphone. | ||
| And it worked out. | ||
| We did it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
This is awesome. | |
| Thanks for having me on, man. | ||
| And so April 28th is the show on Meat Eater. | ||
| It's on the Sportsman's channel. | ||
| You can find it on the internet in your local... | ||
| When are we doing this again, man? | ||
| When are we hunting again? | ||
| What are we doing? | ||
| We just gotta line it up. | ||
| I could always justify it. | ||
| Let's do it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Come on, man. | ||
| I think we should do a wild pig thing. | ||
| Let's do it. | ||
| From the ground. | ||
| From the ground. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| No helicopters. | ||
| Can we not do it April 25th, 26th, 27th, 28th? | ||
| Because I'll be in Edmonton at the Comic Street. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, wow. | |
| As long as we don't do it then, I'll be... | ||
| I'm not playing my dad. | ||
| Edmonton, Alberta, Canada? | ||
| Yeah, I'll just be there doing stand-up at April 25th. | ||
| It's 26th, 27th, and 28th. | ||
| Alright, we're going to work it out, but we're all going together again? | ||
| Fuck yeah, we're going together again. | ||
| I'm absolutely committed. | ||
| Northern California? | ||
| I'm committed. | ||
| So April 28th, you'll see our show. | ||
| I've watched both of them. | ||
| It was really fun, man. | ||
| It was such a good day. | ||
| It was such a cool experience. | ||
| Some of the best food, most satisfying food I've ever eaten in my life. | ||
| Sitting down on the ground, 10 degrees outside, cooking deer over a fire. | ||
| It was fucking amazing. | ||
| Let's do it again. | ||
| Couldn't have been more fun. | ||
| The cashmere killer. | ||
| The cashmere killer! | ||
| I'm writing a blog about the entire event that I'll put up this week because I have pictures of Brian taking a shit outside and we put a flag, an aluminum foil in it, and we're going to offer money on Twitter, like $1,000, if anybody could find it and take a picture of their face next to Brian's shit, if you could find it on the Missouri Breaks. | ||
|
unidentified
|
We'll give you a rough Am I excluded? | |
| Yeah, you're excluded. | ||
| It turns out we had to put the poop in biodegradable bags. | ||
| You had to take your poop with it. | ||
| You're not supposed to leave your poop behind. | ||
| That makes it all the more tricky to find. | ||
| Those bags, those shit bags were space age. | ||
| Somewhere in a foil bag. | ||
| They were space age. | ||
| There's nothing quite like the first night, being outside the tent, shitting into a bag with my pants down. | ||
| It's pouring rain. | ||
| Just not quite cold enough for it to freeze. | ||
| We're just pouring rain. | ||
| I'm shitting into a bag going, whoa. | ||
| I was trying to clean my butt with my thermos. | ||
| I was trying to run water. | ||
| I ran out of water and I'm cleaning my fucking butt. | ||
| I have to ask this before we... | ||
| Are we going to release the ravine-comer footage and put that on the internet? | ||
| Is it possible? | ||
|
unidentified
|
It just isn't because it would... | |
| I work for people. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You can't have me mock coming in a ravine? | |
| Here's the better answer. | ||
| I'm not the guy to ask. | ||
| And that's dead serious. | ||
| Whoever's the editor. | ||
| Talk over there. | ||
| Whoever's the editor. | ||
| I got a fat bag of weed with your name on it, and I know you want it. | ||
| Okay, let's make this happen. | ||
| We need to get the ravine cover, and we need to get it on the internet. | ||
| And me pulling quills out of your rump. | ||
| Yeah, that was fun, too. | ||
| That's out there. | ||
| Oh, it's on the internet? | ||
| Is it on the internet? | ||
| We're a family program, but that's out there. | ||
| We're putting that out. | ||
| Okay, beautiful. | ||
| Yeah, Brian, for like an hour, pulled quills out of my ass. | ||
| You know, it was very heartfelt, man. | ||
| It was very heartfelt. | ||
| And it made me appreciate you guys' friendship. | ||
| Because you were joking about it. | ||
| You were joking about it, but he did it. | ||
| Oh, no. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| A lot of dudes would just be like, uh-uh, I ain't doing that. | ||
| I ain't no homo. | ||
| And they wouldn't do it. | ||
| And I would do it for him in a fucking heartbeat. | ||
| Dick party. | ||
| All right. | ||
| Dick party. | ||
| What's that? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Dick party. | |
| Dick party. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Thanks to Hover.com for sponsoring this program. | ||
| Go to Hover.com forward slash Rogan. | ||
| Get 10% off your domain name. | ||
| Thanks also to Ting for sponsoring our podcast. | ||
| If you go to Rogan.Ting.com, you can save yourself... | ||
| What is it? | ||
| 25 bucks. | ||
| 25 bucks off of either a phone or service. | ||
| Thanks also to Onnit.com. | ||
| That's O-N-N-I-T. Use the code name Rogan. | ||
| Save 10% off. | ||
| You can follow Steven Ranella on Twitter. | ||
| That is his Twitter name. | ||
| It's Steven Ranella with a V. Not some fucking PH like some freak that likes to spell. | ||
| Why would you spell it with a PH when you can use a V and I know exactly what the fuck you're saying. | ||
| Huh? | ||
| Follow him on Twitter. | ||
| And follow MeatEater on Twitter as well. | ||
| And Brian Gallon. | ||
| Get the Sportsman's channel if you don't have it. | ||
| If you want to see us on our fucking amazing, life-changing hunt. | ||
| It was a great time. | ||
| Thank you, my brother. | ||
| Appreciate it. | ||
| We're going to do this again. | ||
| We're going to do podcasts again. | ||
| We're going to hunt again. | ||
| We're going to live, goddammit. | ||
| And you're going to live, too. | ||
| We're going to get through this shit. | ||
| Stay together. | ||
| Keep it together. | ||
| Love your neighbor. | ||
| Kumbaya. | ||
| And eat meat. | ||
| And come in ravines whenever possible. |
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