April 17, 2012 - The Joe Rogan Experience
02:49:41
Participants
| 
| Speaker | Time | Text |
|---|---|---|
|
unidentified
|
Boom! | |
| It seems like it's been a long time. | ||
| It does. | ||
| How long has it been? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Uh... | |
| Friday. | ||
| Friday. | ||
| What's today? | ||
| Monday? | ||
| Tuesday? | ||
| Monday. | ||
| No. | ||
| What is today? | ||
| Tuesday. | ||
| Tuesday. | ||
| It's been a long time for what? | ||
| I don't even know what fucking day is. | ||
| I don't know where it is, what time it is. | ||
| Too much of a whirlwind life, Eddie Bravo. | ||
| The Joe Rogan Experience Podcast is brought to you by The Fleshlight. | ||
| If you go to JoeRogan.net and click on the link for The Fleshlight and enter in the code name ROGAN, you will save 15% off the number one sex toy for men. | ||
| Oh boy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yippee. | |
| Go get it! | ||
| We're also brought to you by Onnit. | ||
| Onnit.com, that's O-N-N-I-T. Makers of AlphaBrain, the cognitive enhancing supplement, NuMood, which is a 5-HTP and L-tryptophan supplement. | ||
| But you know what, folks? | ||
| I'm not a scientist, nor am I unreasonably smart. | ||
| So don't listen to me. | ||
| What you need to do if you're interested in anything that's nootropics, and that's what AlphaBrain is, and that's what... | ||
| Bill Romanowski's Neuro One is. | ||
| There's a bunch of really good ones on the market besides the one that we have. | ||
| But if you're interested in the one that we have, go to onnit.com, O-N-N-I-T, and enter in the code name ROGAN, and you will get 10% off of anything you buy there. | ||
| Anything you buy there. | ||
| Also, the first 30 pills, there is a 100% money-back guarantee. | ||
| You don't have to return the product. | ||
| You can just say, yo, this shit sucks, and you get your money back. | ||
| Hey, dude, when is Aubrey going to come out with a mushroom head alpha dog? | ||
|
unidentified
|
You know what I mean? | |
| A mushroom head alpha dog? | ||
|
unidentified
|
What the fuck was that? | |
| No, no, you know how basically there's already been supplements that, you know, there's like brain factor supplements. | ||
| Like Larry's company even had a brain factor. | ||
| But what he did is he did that and fucking ran with it and made it the best it could possibly be. | ||
| Get the best shit, the best quality gourmet brain factor supplement, right? | ||
| There's been plenty of them, but this one's gourmet. | ||
| Do the same thing with dick pills, like those herbal Viagra, take that shit and go. | ||
| I think there's some stuff that probably has some sort of an effect on you. | ||
| I think it's all about nitric oxide. | ||
| That's also in Jack3D and things along those lines. | ||
| That's one of the reasons why they say that Viagra is actually a performance-enhancing supplement. | ||
| Did you know that athletes take Viagra now? | ||
| Hell yeah, all the pussy they get. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I need to start playing soccer. | |
| They would have to to keep up with it. | ||
| No, it actually helps your athletic performance. | ||
| Oh, that's what they say. | ||
| That's what they tell the bitches. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They find the Viagra bottle. | |
| This is how you've been fucking me for two hours straight. | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| It's for muscle recovery. | ||
| That's hilarious. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Come on. | |
| Yeah, they fund a scientific study for it. | ||
| That's what you gotta tell the bitches when you get caught with. | ||
| Oh, it's a bodybuilding thing. | ||
| You know, my dick works fine. | ||
| Could you imagine if it was a grand conspiracy and that is really what it was for? | ||
|
unidentified
|
You just uncovered that shit? | |
| Hey, let's talk about this on the podcast. | ||
| Cue the music. | ||
| Make it official, Brian. | ||
| We haven't even started? | ||
| No, bro. | ||
| We're crazy. | ||
| That was all. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Showing my day. | |
| Joe Rogan podcast by night. | ||
| All day. | ||
| People hear it. | ||
| See, it's an illusion. | ||
| It did start, but yet it didn't start. | ||
| It doesn't officially start until the music starts. | ||
| But all that other stuff was recorded and broadcast, so it did start. | ||
| You guys do it like a professional radio show. | ||
| You've got an intro. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's right, Eddie. | |
| You know why? | ||
| Because if someone ever wanted to edit it, I wanted to make it as easy as possible. | ||
| Take out where the advertisements are. | ||
| But I also wanted to make the advertisements as organic as possible without sounding like too much of a queen. | ||
| Mushroom dog. | ||
| What is mushroom dog? | ||
|
unidentified
|
What is the idea? | |
| Like a big mushroom head. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| That's what you can call it. | ||
| The dog part of it. | ||
| But I don't get the dog. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't know. | |
| You want to fuck like a vicious dog? | ||
| Come on. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Mushroom dog. | |
| Mushroom dog? | ||
| Right? | ||
| You make me feel really stoned. | ||
| Like a wolf-like dog with a giant boner as the logo. | ||
| Well, you know, they used to say that that's what the Vikings, that the Vikings used to take mushrooms. | ||
| And I think it was the Amanita muscaria. | ||
| I think that's the mushroom they were supposedly taking. | ||
| And they would go into berserker mode. | ||
| They would get fucked up on mushrooms before they would go and jack people. | ||
| I mean, is there a mushroom that enhances sexual performance? | ||
| I mean, don't the mushroom experts say that being on mushrooms makes you sexual? | ||
| The times I've been on mushrooms, I definitely was sexual. | ||
| You want to massage and sex feels awesome. | ||
| Yeah, definitely. | ||
| Yeah, I agree with that. | ||
| So in terms of like how it feels, yeah. | ||
| Like marijuana too. | ||
| I mean, especially when you eat it. | ||
| God damn, man. | ||
| If you and your lady eat like a little pot brownie together and you chill together for an hour and wait until it kicks in and whoa! | ||
| You can have some intense sex. | ||
| It's almost like a psychedelic experience, man. | ||
| Nice. | ||
| It gets dark. | ||
| I think that most things that are, as far as feel and sensual things, like music and stuff along those lines, most of those things are accentuated by marijuana. | ||
| Absolutely. | ||
| Right? | ||
| Of course. | ||
| You're the first person that introduced me to marijuana for people don't even know. | ||
| Eddie Bravo, back in the day, got me high and then we had ice cream sundaes. | ||
| It was the greatest experience of my life. | ||
| You know, because when I started smoking weed, everyone thought I was fucking crazy. | ||
| At the gym, at Jiu Jitsu, I was a purple belt when I started. | ||
| And I just became a hemp activist, trying to, you know... | ||
| Preach the truth about weed. | ||
| And everyone thought I was crazy. | ||
| And then I thought, man, if I can get Joe. | ||
| Joe's so smart. | ||
| Everybody listens to him. | ||
| If I can just get Joe high. | ||
| I knew for sure your comedy would just fucking sprout. | ||
| I was a million percent sure. | ||
| I just had to talk you into it, and you weren't easy. | ||
| It took a couple months of sitting down and talking to you. | ||
| You were like me. | ||
| I was like, I was not into it at all up until I was 28. I thought it made you fucking stupid. | ||
| I thought I turned you into a loser. | ||
| I don't think it took that long for me to do it, dude. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't really remember. | |
| I remember one time I was on the 101 freeway going over Lancashire. | ||
| And I had you... | ||
| Like, we couldn't just start talking about weed all the time. | ||
| I would seem like a fucking... | ||
| Just some insane dude if I just brought up weed. | ||
|
unidentified
|
My mission was to... | |
| I just had to sprinkle it in sometimes in our conversation. | ||
| And then I had you... | ||
| I was talking to... | ||
| I was on the freeway and I didn't want to go over the pass and lose you. | ||
| It was such an important call that I pulled over on the freeway to finish my point. | ||
| Some story, some analogy, some weed analogy, some historical facts, some shit that I was reading from Jack Herrera's book. | ||
| I had that shit memorized. | ||
| I would... | ||
| I would Xerox the chapters and make copies of the chapters and I'd be at jujitsu and just handing them to do this. | ||
| I couldn't hand them books. | ||
| I was a brokester. | ||
| That's right, I remember this. | ||
| I would pass out pamphlets. | ||
| I would just Xerox shit from Jack Herrera's book. | ||
|
unidentified
|
People thought I was nuts! | |
| They thought I was crazy! | ||
| It's really funny. | ||
| That's so funny, man. | ||
| You're that guy. | ||
| You're that guy at the locker room handing out leaflets. | ||
| But hey, man, that's what you had to do before the internet, man. | ||
| That's what I was doing, man. | ||
| That's what you had to do. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I just wanted to... | |
| Dude, you were the internet. | ||
| You were a human internet. | ||
| Yeah, once people started to think I was crazy, that just drove me. | ||
| Now I got to prove to these motherfuckers that I'm... | ||
| So I would bring in pamphlets. | ||
| I go, just read that. | ||
| Just this one fucking page. | ||
| And if you want, read the second page. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And then people... | |
| It was making sense to a lot of people, but still, you know, most people, like myself, were totally afraid of it. | ||
| And then when I started hanging out with Joe, I heard about you training. | ||
| I heard there was an actor guy training at the gym. | ||
| It was before Fear Factor. | ||
| It was during news radio. | ||
| And so I was like, yeah, there's an actor, dude. | ||
| He's on NBC. He trains at night or whatever. | ||
| And I was training during the day. | ||
| And I ran into you once or twice and go, oh, that's that actor dude. | ||
| Never watched news radio. | ||
| But I saw you at the comedy store. | ||
| I loved going to the Comedy Store, and I was there with some chick, and I'm like, that's that dude that trains at my school, the celebrity dude. | ||
| And then you got off stage, I'm like, hey dude, I train in jiu-jitsu, you remember me? | ||
| And you're like, oh shit, you're at the Machado's. | ||
| And we just started talking there. | ||
| One time Eddie thought that someone was fucking with him at a diner, because you didn't have your contacts on. | ||
| Yes, I didn't have my contacts on. | ||
| It's nighttime, I was kind of a little tipsy. | ||
| Yeah, dude. | ||
| And you actually recognized me, and I didn't recognize you, right? | ||
| Yeah, I was outside of your range of vision. | ||
| And you're like, oh, dude, I can't see shit outside. | ||
| How bad is your vision if you don't have contacts on? | ||
| It's not that bad. | ||
| If I'm like 10 yards away from you, you start getting a little fuzzy. | ||
| Do I look like a pretty girl right now? | ||
| Do I look like a pretty girl right now? | ||
| I have my contacts in. | ||
| It was at Mel's Diner. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I thought you were hitting on the chick or something, right? | |
| I don't know what you thought. | ||
| I think you thought I was fucking with you. | ||
| I think you thought I was fucking with you. | ||
| I don't remember what it was. | ||
| I don't remember what I said. | ||
| I was just like, yo, Eddie! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yo, Eddie! | |
| And for whatever reason, your brain misinterpreted that as someone fucking with you. | ||
| And you're like, oh, hey, dude. | ||
| Oh, damn. | ||
| I could have swore it was you saying that you couldn't see that good. | ||
| Yeah, I couldn't see that good. | ||
| And I actually thought you were fucking with me or I don't know what it was. | ||
| Dude, that could not see that good. | ||
| That trips me the fuck out because my eyes are going, man. | ||
| And I barely knew you. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I barely knew you. | |
| I didn't watch news radio. | ||
| There's a lot of dudes that go to the gym. | ||
| I met you once or twice. | ||
| I was probably faded. | ||
| And, you know, and someone's calling me and I'm like, I don't know what the fuck's going on. | ||
| But then you were taking privates from Silvio at the time. | ||
| Remember? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| You were only doing privates in the beginning. | ||
| You weren't rolling. | ||
| You thought you were doing the best shit, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I was only rolling with him. | ||
| And then you guys were like, on an off hour, you invited me one time, remember? | ||
| He was giving you a private, and you invited me to come down to roll, too. | ||
| Yeah, and he came down and stoned and strangled me. | ||
| He was so high. | ||
| I could totally tell you that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I remember that, too. | |
| I got you in a twister, too. | ||
| Oh, dude, you got me in everything. | ||
| I think I just got you once. | ||
| You got me a couple times. | ||
| I think it was more than once. | ||
| I think it was like twice. | ||
| I was just a purple belt. | ||
| I wasn't that good. | ||
| And you came in strong. | ||
| I didn't know what you were doing. | ||
| I had no idea what you were doing. | ||
| When you went for that Twister Roll, dude, I was so lost. | ||
| That's when we started training together. | ||
| That was so fucking long ago. | ||
| Long time ago, man. | ||
| And then we ran into each other in 97 in Louisiana. | ||
| Yeah, the UFC. You were with Ricky Rocket. | ||
| Yeah, I was with Ricky Rocket, drummer for Poison. | ||
| I just recently met him. | ||
| Did I meet him back then? | ||
| I don't know if I met him back then. | ||
| I might have met him back then, but I recently met him at the Hard Rock. | ||
| He's a black belt Brazilian jiu-jitsu. | ||
| The drummer of Poison. | ||
| All that makeup. | ||
| Legit. | ||
| Machado lineage. | ||
| Yeah, he's a hardcore martial artist. | ||
| He was way into Jeet Kune Do as well and weapons and shit like that. | ||
| Before jiu-jitsu blew up, he was already into kung fu and shit. | ||
| And he just jumped on jiu-jitsu because he's smart and... | ||
| I love when people get into it. | ||
| What's his name? | ||
| Jonathan Lipnicki? | ||
| Is that his name? | ||
| The young kid who was an actor. | ||
| Was he from Jerry Maguire? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, that young kid from Jerry Maguire is really good, apparently. | ||
| Apparently Heffron rolls in him. | ||
| He strangles Heffron. | ||
| That's crazy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Isn't that awesome? | |
| Yeah. | ||
| I love hearing shit like that, man. | ||
| That is crazy, though, right? | ||
| Dude, it's one of the coolest things that I hear when we go on the road, when we do comedy shows, is how many people come up to me after the show and tell me that they start doing jujitsu after they listen to the podcast. | ||
| I get those tweets. | ||
| I get those tweets all the time. | ||
| And they always tag you in them, too. | ||
| I'm sure you said. | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| All the time. | ||
| All the time. | ||
| And I meet those folks. | ||
| When I do comedy shows, man, this past weekend in Fort Lauderdale, I met a gang of dudes that were talking to me about jiu-jitsu. | ||
| A gang of dudes that hadn't done jiu-jitsu until they listened to the podcast. | ||
| Just one after the other would come and tell me that. | ||
| Which is awesome, man. | ||
| You hear shit like that. | ||
| Isn't it crazy? | ||
| The drummer for Poison is a bad motherfucker. | ||
| He'll strangle people. | ||
| It's crazy, right? | ||
| Fuck yeah. | ||
| Nobody wore more makeup than Poison, but that dude will fuck you up. | ||
|
unidentified
|
With weapons, with kung fu, with jiu-jitsu. | |
| No one ever really gave a fuck about the dudes in the crazy, you know, hair and makeup doing that because everybody knew they were doing that because they were rock stars and they got insane amounts of pussy. | ||
| It's like, it was never even, I mean, even if you were like, oh, look at what they're doing. | ||
| And Ogie, you're wearing crazy lipstick and crazy makeup. | ||
| They got so much pussy, you couldn't say shit. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's basically the more feminine they go, they're going, the more pussy you get, the more you could dress like a chick because no one can say shit. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
If you had 50 hot chicks around you, you could just start sucking a dick and you'd be fine. | |
| Like, I got all these chicks. | ||
| I don't know about that. | ||
| I don't know about that. | ||
| I think you would lose a lot of people with that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't know. | |
| I don't know. | ||
| Everyone, you know what? | ||
| You know, there's rumors about David Bowie, and you hear those Mick Jagger rumors. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What do you think that is, man? | |
| With the Rod Stewart, you know what I mean? | ||
|
unidentified
|
And we don't care. | |
| It's just like that Richard Gere gerbil rumor. | ||
| You know, you gotta wonder, you know, how easy was it to spread a rumor back then? | ||
| I mean, did Mick Jagger and David Bowie really go to bed? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really? | |
| That's a serious rumor. | ||
| Yeah, it's an incredible rumor. | ||
| The gerbil rumor. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Remember that? | |
| I think it was one of the wives said it, though, that she walked in on them. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I would bet for that. | |
| I think back then, the internet was the tabloids. | ||
| That's it. | ||
| Those newspapers you see at the store. | ||
| Everyone goes to Rite Aid. | ||
| Everyone goes to a drugstore. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Everyone goes to the airport. | |
| Yeah, those are like those crazy sites. | ||
| You can get that shit out real quick. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Remember, it's like extra, extra. | |
| Read all about it. | ||
| If you made the front page of some newspaper, back then everybody read the newspaper. | ||
| When was the last time you read a newspaper? | ||
| I rarely read newspapers. | ||
| When I go to Starbucks, I'll read the cover. | ||
| I'll read the cover at Starbucks. | ||
| That's it. | ||
| I ain't going through that shit. | ||
| I'll do it if I'm on the road by myself and I'm really fucking bored. | ||
| I'll get the New York Times. | ||
| I'll get the New York Times and I'll go through that thing. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I never look at the newspaper. | |
| I probably should, but it's like, man, I don't know. | ||
| It's outdated. | ||
| Newspapers are outdated. | ||
| You already know all this shit in a newspaper like 12 hours before you see it in a newspaper. | ||
| Yeah, it really is an ineffective way of doing it. | ||
| That's why they're hurting. | ||
| That's why New York Times on the iPad is probably going to, at one day, be more popular than the regular New York Times. | ||
| For sure. | ||
| You see, what's really important, though, real journalism is really important, but it's real scary, and it's really dangerous. | ||
| Like, for someone to really dig deep, like, Matt Taibbi-style into the inner workings of the government and corruption and Goldman Sachs and all that shit, dude, that's terrifying. | ||
| With that kind of shit, we need a lot of that. | ||
| There's a lot of chaos and corruption going on. | ||
| And it just seems every year like it's more and more just a part of the way we just accept how this life is set up. | ||
| We don't even... | ||
|
unidentified
|
No one's going to do anything about it. | |
| No one's doing shit about it. | ||
| Nothing. | ||
| Just the way it runs, man. | ||
| It's going to take a lot to shift the power back to the people. | ||
| It's going to take fucking a miracle, man. | ||
| It's amazing, isn't it? | ||
| I mean, the situation that we're in right now is amazing because this is the first time where people have really kind of truly been aware of how the whole system runs. | ||
| And you look at all these different National Defense Authorization Act and this new one that doesn't allow you to do any protests where there's Secret Service anywhere nearby. | ||
| You can get arrested. | ||
| It's a felony, which means you can go to jail for over a year. | ||
| For protesting, which is supposed to be a part of our constitutional rights, the right to protest, but they just recently passed a law, Obama signed it, that if you protest in front of Secret Service agents, well, Secret Service agents are protecting someone. | ||
| It could be a candidate, it could be a journalist, someone who works for the White House, whoever the fuck the Secret Service is protecting, if you are protesting in front of them, that's a felony. | ||
| That's crazy. | ||
| That's like communist Cuba type shit. | ||
| It doesn't shock me. | ||
| That just makes fucking sense. | ||
| The way the presidency is turning out, it's... | ||
| For a million percent, Obama's going to win again. | ||
| I mean, they're just... | ||
| For sure he's going to win. | ||
| There's no way. | ||
| He's gotten so much done for fucking big business. | ||
| There's no way he's not going to win. | ||
| Mitt Romney? | ||
| He's got YouTube videos where they show him lying back and forth, evidence in your face, him flip-flopping. | ||
| It's just busted out. | ||
| He's caught lying so many times. | ||
| And he's the dude who's going to go against Obama? | ||
| They want Obama back in. | ||
| Obama is staying. | ||
| This shit's set up. | ||
| I think all the other ones just aren't that good. | ||
| Yeah, you say that though, but you know how many old racist white people are just so looking to get a white guy back in power? | ||
| And especially a white Republican to straighten things out. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Regular people. | |
| If Mitt Romney flip-flops, that's all well and good. | ||
| As long as people accept him and like him enough so they can get him to be their puppet. | ||
| Because that's all they're looking for. | ||
| They're looking to get a puppet in place. | ||
| I don't think regular people are going to mind nearly as much as you think. | ||
| You know what? | ||
| Who knows what the fuck is happening. | ||
| That's just my guess. | ||
| My guess is a million percent Obama's going to win. | ||
| It looks like he's being set up to win. | ||
| He just looks so powerful right now. | ||
| I think it's Roseanne Barr. | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| That guy's a joke. | ||
| Roseanne Barr. | ||
| Why did you say Roseanne? | ||
| She's trying to be president. | ||
| Is she really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| She was in this place at 8 the other day. | ||
| The waitress had this badge on. | ||
| It says, Roseanne Barr for president. | ||
| And I was like, why do you have that? | ||
| And she goes, oh, she's running for president. | ||
| And she was here like an hour ago. | ||
| Well, I'll tell you what, dude. | ||
| She for sure could be governor. | ||
| She wanted to start off as governor and work her way up to president. | ||
| If there's any woman who I think might be able to do something like that, she could do it. | ||
| Roseanne's a powerful woman. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| Right. | ||
| That's a badass bitch. | ||
| I mean, Roseanne Barr was a killer stand-up comedian. | ||
| She was a killer, man. | ||
| Back in the day. | ||
| You know? | ||
| That's crazy. | ||
| She even looks like presidential. | ||
| Look at that picture of her. | ||
| I'll tell you what, dude. | ||
| She's fucking smart, man. | ||
| Read her tweets. | ||
| She says some smart shit. | ||
| She's cool. | ||
| She's, you know, she's obviously crazy. | ||
| She's a comedian. | ||
| We're all crazy. | ||
| Crazy in bed. | ||
| Whoa, Brian, you think? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Why don't you ask Tom Arnold? | ||
| Ooh, burn. | ||
| When you're a dude like Tom Arnold, that's a tricky situation, man. | ||
| There's so much. | ||
| Because obviously he's a talented guy. | ||
| I mean, Tom Arnold, I like Tom Arnold. | ||
| I've been on that Best Damn Sports show with him. | ||
| He's a very nice guy. | ||
| And obviously talented. | ||
| He's really funny in that movie he did with Arnold Schwarzenegger. | ||
| But when you're a dude and you're married to one of those super powerful women, like, man, that's got to be a weird spot. | ||
| He seems like he would give me heart palpitations just being around him. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really? | |
| He just seems too intense and fast. | ||
| Like, I don't know. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't know. | |
| He was cool. | ||
| I liked him. | ||
| But that's a tough spot, being married to the superwoman. | ||
| You know? | ||
| It's hard. | ||
| Good luck with that. | ||
| Good luck with that. | ||
| Usually they're like a really quiet, personal trainer type dude. | ||
| Some dude who gets really good massages who can eat her box. | ||
| Did you hear about all those hookers? | ||
| What? | ||
| The hookers in New York City, or the... | ||
| Columbians? | ||
| Secret Service, yeah. | ||
| Yeah, they were awesome. | ||
| The Secret Service were in a brothel in Columbia, and apparently one of the Secret Service guys refused to pay. | ||
| And it became like this big thing where they brought in the police. | ||
| You know, because you can't just... | ||
| This is their story. | ||
| Who knows what really happened? | ||
| Apparently the Secret Service was just going at it in Columbia. | ||
| Yeah, they went there like a week early and just getting wasted, getting girls, and I guess there's up to like 15 girls that checked in. | ||
| How does this story ever get out? | ||
| This seems to me like, how could anybody mismanage something like this to the point where they would let this story get out? | ||
| Well, because there's so many people involved. | ||
| The hookers are, I think, legal there. | ||
| Right. | ||
| So they work these things with the hotels for security reasons. | ||
| Like, if you're going to be coming in the hotel to be a hooker, then you have to leave your ID at the front desk. | ||
| So it's kind of like on paperwork. | ||
| It's legal, it's tolerated, but there's also trails for everything. | ||
| Oh, I see what you're saying. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So, well, we don't know what happened, but apparently she said that he didn't want to pay? | ||
| That's what she said? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I think that's what it is. | ||
| Something happened up there. | ||
| You know, it's so shocking the Secret Service guys would like some sex. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| They're big brawny men that are assigned to protect one of the most powerful people on the planet. | ||
| Can't they get a little sex? | ||
| Is that okay? | ||
| But you know what's crazy is that these hookers... | ||
| No guys hatin'. | ||
| These hookers were allowed inside their hotel rooms where they had itineraries for what Obama's schedule was while he's going to be visiting and stuff like that. | ||
| Like insane shit. | ||
| Like sloppy shit. | ||
| That's really fucked up. | ||
| Are you sure about that? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Heard it on Howard today. | ||
| Oh, okay. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I think I reserve judgment until I know anything. | ||
| I don't know what really happened. | ||
| Who knows? | ||
| You know, when someone says... | ||
| As long as they're a single, you know what I mean? | ||
| Who cares? | ||
| It's legal. | ||
| What is the... | ||
| All the, you know... | ||
| It was... | ||
| Someone said that he didn't pay. | ||
| That was like the big dispute, right? | ||
| Or something happened. | ||
| Something happened. | ||
| Or someone... | ||
| Which is crazy because... | ||
| I would like to know exactly what went down word for word. | ||
| Like, you know what I mean? | ||
| Because, wait a minute! | ||
|
unidentified
|
I didn't fuck you in your ass! | |
| Why you charged me 300? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I did not put it in your ass! | |
| I did not put it in your ass! | ||
| Call your manager! | ||
| Call him! | ||
| Call your manager! | ||
|
unidentified
|
You know who the fuck I am? | |
| I'm Secret Service, bitch! | ||
| Whoa. | ||
| Do you think that's how they roll? | ||
| Could you imagine? | ||
| That'd be crazy. | ||
| So, dude, speaking of Secret Service, I watched the, you know, there's these folks at this production company that used to do that Jesse Ventura show, the Conspiracy Theory show. | ||
| And I was talking to them about this idea that they have. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wait, the producers of that show? | |
| Yes, the producers of that show. | ||
| I was talking to them about this idea that they had, and as we got talking, somehow or another we got to talking about conspiracy theories because of that show. | ||
| And what they wanted that show to be, what it ultimately became, and how they weren't happy with the direction that it all went. | ||
| But they started talking to me about JFK. And they're like, have you seen our special on JFK? I'm pretty familiar with the case. | ||
| I know it pretty well. | ||
| I've read several books about it. | ||
| I've watched a bunch of different documentaries on it. | ||
| Well, they gave me the Jesse Ventura episode of it. | ||
| It's fucking, it's pretty interesting, man. | ||
| You saw it? | ||
| Yeah, it's pretty interesting. | ||
| Did you learn any new things? | ||
| Well, you know, they set up a rifle thing where you could see the distance of how far he was shooting from the window and how accurate you could be with that rifle in that amount of time, six seconds, fire off three shots. | ||
| And you watch that and you go, wow, that's not likely. | ||
| It's not likely he did that. | ||
| So, what's your theory on who did it? | ||
| And how did they get away with it? | ||
| Well, this is the other thing. | ||
| They focus on this guy, E. Howard Hunt, who is a known assassin, a known CIA agent, a guy who was... | ||
| You know, he was arrested for Watergate and wound up doing time for that. | ||
| So you believe he was assassinated by the CIA? Yeah, for sure. | ||
| I think. | ||
| If I had to guess. | ||
| Because he wanted to abolish the CIA. Yeah, I think Lee Harvey Oswald probably wasn't innocent. | ||
| I mean, it was pretty obvious that Lee Harvey Oswald was some sort of a government agent. | ||
| But it seems more than likely, when you look at all the evidence about how fucking ridiculous the whole scenario was, the way they were parading him in that open area where it was totally unprotected, the president with the roof down, and they slowed down around the turn, the Secret Service guys were- There's so much shit, right? | ||
| There's so much shit. | ||
| This is a setup. | ||
| They set this up and they killed that fucking guy. | ||
| Yeah, for people not to at least say there's something fishy going on. | ||
| Like, what is fishy to you? | ||
| Like, you look at 9-1-1, shit, there's just so much fun. | ||
| Isn't it fishy that Tower 7 just fucking got demoed? | ||
| Isn't that fucking fishy? | ||
| Doesn't that ring a fucking bell? | ||
| There's just so much nonsense with the case. | ||
| The single bullet theory is often debated, okay? | ||
| And the scary thing about it is how many people are willing to come up with this weird, irrational... | ||
| Explanation for why this one bullet did all these unlikely things and then wound up on the gurney and the only reason for that is because that one bullet helps negate the possibility of conspiracy and attribute all three bullets to one guy and it's the only real reason to do it And the only reason they had to attribute this one bullet to all these wounds was because there was a man under the underpass, and this guy got hit in the face by a ricochet. | ||
| The bullet hit the curb right in front of him, and the curb stone came up and fucked his head up. | ||
| So this guy had to go to the hospital, and he told them what happened. | ||
| So they knew that was a shot that was in the record, and they knew there was one other wound to Kennedy that was in the record. | ||
| So the head shot Before the headshot, the one that hit him in the back had to do all of his damage and then all the damage to Governor Connolly as well. | ||
| So that's the only reason why they attributed it to this one bullet. | ||
| And then they magically find this bullet on a gurney in the hospital. | ||
| And then the bullet doesn't even have any damage to it. | ||
| The bullet looks like a bullet that's been fired through water. | ||
| It doesn't look like a bullet looks when it goes through two human beings. | ||
| It just doesn't. | ||
| Period. | ||
| I mean, it's nonsense. | ||
| Every single test that they've ever done where they've tried to duplicate it, they haven't been able to. | ||
| Mythbusters wasn't able to. | ||
| Every time they hit bone, it fucked that bullet up. | ||
| It shattered that bullet. | ||
| The bullet was all contorted and twisted. | ||
| Not the magic bullet. | ||
| The magic bullet came out in near pristine condition, like they shot it into a million pillows. | ||
| It looked amazing. | ||
| It didn't even look flattened. | ||
| That's some scary shit. | ||
| It's scary as fuck that people were willing to accept that. | ||
| The only reason that that is on record is because they wanted a conclusion that they had already come up to. | ||
| They'd come up with this Lee Harvey Oswald was guilty long before this was ever a question. | ||
| It'd be hot if Marilyn Monroe was going to die. | ||
| There's so much shit. | ||
| It's like so much evidence of... | ||
| They wanted Lee Harvey Oswald to be guilty. | ||
| That was period. | ||
| That's what the Warren Commission was set up to show, that Lee Harvey Oswald was guilty. | ||
| That's why that best evidence book is so creepy. | ||
| It's a fucking creepy subject, isn't it? | ||
| That they killed the president? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It would be really cool, though, if it was Marilyn Monroe and Jimi Hendrix in a hot air balloon with two sniper rifles or something. | ||
| If it was something that sexy and awesome. | ||
| If they did a legit investigation where they were after the person who shot... | ||
| If they were... | ||
| There was just too much fishy shit. | ||
| They would have went after it. | ||
| Yeah, well the photos of E. Howard Hunt are ridiculous because there's a photo of him. | ||
| They arrested three hobos. | ||
| They were arrested, by the way, right outside the area where the grassy knoll is, where supposedly the headshot came from. | ||
| The reason why Kennedy's head goes back and to the left. | ||
| And there's a photo of him when they were arresting these three hobos. | ||
| These hobos were not hobos, man. | ||
| They looked like young men, healthy people. | ||
| They didn't look like there was anything wrong with them. | ||
| They didn't look fucked up. | ||
| And E. Howard Hunt is clearly in that photo. | ||
| You can pull the photo up. | ||
| E. Howard Hunt JFK assassination photo. | ||
| And there's an... | ||
| Yeah, that's it, man. | ||
| So you can see him. | ||
| See that guy with the hat in the back? | ||
| That is E. Howard Hunt. | ||
| And they've taken photo images and put his face over the face of E. Howard Hunt. | ||
| His bone structure and everything, it matches exactly. | ||
| That guy was a killer! | ||
| That guy was a fucking killer and he was hanging out behind the grassy knoll. | ||
| They arrested those guys and then let them free. | ||
| Didn't charge them with shit. | ||
| Yeah, didn't charge him with shit. | ||
| Despite all the evidence that there was someone in the grassy knoll shooting guns, there was all these people saying that shots were coming from behind them that were standing in front of the grassy knoll. | ||
| They had all these witnesses. | ||
| And a huge amount of people mysteriously died that were witnesses to this shit. | ||
| A huge amount. | ||
| There was a documentary they did where they talked about the odds What the odds were that all these people who had witnessed the Kennedy assassination would be killed in either violent murders or horrible car accidents or fires or train track accidents where they parked their car on train tracks. | ||
| They killed a lot of fucking people, man. | ||
| It's really possible that they tied up all the loose ends. | ||
| It's really possible that they killed the president and then they went out and they killed a whole bunch of people that might have been able to tell that they killed the president. | ||
| And they cleaned that shit up nice, and they put it in a big book, and they called it the Warren Commission Report, and then there you go. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's it. | |
| There you go. | ||
| Same thing with the 911 Commission Report. | ||
| Same thing. | ||
| Do you think that? | ||
| Do you really think 9-11 was a conspiracy? | ||
| Is that what you think? | ||
| For sure? | ||
| I think it's just so damn fishy, man. | ||
| Just so much... | ||
| I mean, isn't it fishy that Tower 7 got demoed? | ||
| Tower 7 is fishy as fuck. | ||
| That's fishy. | ||
| But what's possible to me... | ||
| It's always possible in the back of my head that you've got to look at incompetence. | ||
| 1,500 engineers and architects, they say it's all bullshit. | ||
| That is Tower 7, right? | ||
| That's what their dispute is. | ||
| It's not 1 and 2, though, right? | ||
| I'm not sure. | ||
| See, the thing about 1 and 2 that a lot of people don't know when we're talking about the towers that fell, this crazy 911 conspiracy shit, fuck you, Rogan, I'm shutting this off right now! | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm tired of your fucking pseudoscience! | |
| Towers 1 and Tower 2 were really the only tower that we know of that's ever been hit by a full jumbo jet, full fuel like that. | ||
| Who knows? | ||
| It might have been that design just was not really the right way to go if you're going to get hit by a fucking plane. | ||
| Because if you watch the way 1 and 2 fall, to me, they fall like a building that's falling apart, which is what I would assume would happen if it started crumbling and crushing. | ||
| It would fall apart that way. | ||
| When you look at Tower 7, though, Tower 7, it goes into its base. | ||
| It collapses into its base. | ||
| It doesn't collapse from the top down and pancake like 1 and 2. There's video of it. | ||
| There's several angles of it. | ||
| We need to get to the bottom. | ||
| It was left out of the 911 commission report, and then the explanations for it are fucking retarded. | ||
| You know, NIST came out, and they did a presentation. | ||
| It's on YouTube. | ||
| N-I-S-T. It's ridiculous. | ||
| Do you think, though, here's an alternate explanation. | ||
| Do you think that Tower 7, first of all, was the less sinister possibility? | ||
| Tower 7 was home to a lot of different organizations, right? | ||
| It wasn't the NSA, and there was a lot of different physical records that were kept there that were lost. | ||
| Completely in the demolition. | ||
| Is it possible that if you have a place or a building that's filled with so much sensitive information, so much dangerous, sensitive information, that they might have built it with the design to implode it whenever they wanted to, in the case of a breach, in case of the possibility of losing all that information to other governments or what have you? | ||
| Well, if that was the only thing that was fishy, there's like a thousand things. | ||
|
unidentified
|
There's just so much shit. | |
| That's just the most obvious one. | ||
| Well, that's the only thing I've looked at for that one. | ||
| That was the most obvious. | ||
| Look at like the Pentagon and all that shit. | ||
| There's so much. | ||
| But it is also possible. | ||
| I do also reserve the possibility that I don't know shit about architecture or engineering and that if you start a massive fucking gasoline fire... | ||
| In the basement of a building and it turns into like essentially like one of those inside of one of those green egg ovens. | ||
| I don't think... | ||
|
unidentified
|
The floors all fall apart. | |
| You just look at Tower 7. There's several angles. | ||
| It gets demoed right in the middle of all that shit. | ||
| Well, it certainly looks like it. | ||
| Add that to everything else. | ||
| And then you saw what people are capable with JFK. That's just like, it's business as usual, dude. | ||
| No, maybe. | ||
| No, I'm not saying it's not. | ||
| But I'm saying one of the things that's interesting is even though it does go in like a controlled demolition, it doesn't blow out like a controlled demolition. | ||
| It's almost like maybe they just did a really sweet one. | ||
| They figured out how to do like... | ||
| We got a really nice way of doing this. | ||
| Minimal explosion. | ||
| Really just kind of falls apart. | ||
| This information doesn't seem important enough for that, though. | ||
| Security got breached, but it also was an airplane to the side of a fucking building. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't think that there's people jumping off the airplane going, like, get the documents! | |
| Get all the important information! | ||
| No, no, I'm not saying that. | ||
| I'm saying that they built it to be able to do that to it. | ||
| I'm saying, from the very moment they built it, they knew that they were going to have the NSA there, they knew they were going to have the DEA documents, whatever the fuck they've got going on in there. | ||
| Whatever crazy shit, bankers, there was a lot of different, like, really high-level government organizations that were being run out of this building. | ||
| If they wanted to design it so that if anything happened, if there was a fire one day, they could just crush it. | ||
| They could just bring it down to the ground. | ||
| I think that's such a small possibility. | ||
| It's a small one. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That seems like if they wanted to spaz out a little or something. | |
| Because if it's not that... | ||
| Okay, because my question, if it's not that, then what is it? | ||
| What, they loaded up the building while everybody was working in it? | ||
| That's highly unlikely. | ||
| It's highly unlikely that you could get away with loading up a building. | ||
| It takes weeks to do that shit. | ||
| We talked about that. | ||
| Dynamite up the ass, remember? | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Up your ass? | ||
| One stick at a time, you remember? | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's right, we did talk about this. | |
| That's hilarious. | ||
| There's lots of evidence and eyewitnesses. | ||
| For weeks and weeks, workers coming in, certain vans. | ||
| There's a lot of testimony. | ||
| They're like, yeah, we just see these guys that work in here at off hours. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, really? | |
| Yeah, there's so much evidence. | ||
| They did such a sloppy job. | ||
| So who are these guys that went and loaded up all these explosives? | ||
| Who knows? | ||
| We don't know. | ||
| Someone did it. | ||
| Someone did it. | ||
| Tower 7 is fucking that controlled demo. | ||
| And then look at the Pentagon. | ||
| They're saying a plane crashed into it, and when you look at the wreck, there's no plane wreckage. | ||
| That's another huge one. | ||
| The Pentagon, a missile hit it, or there was a bomb. | ||
| It was one or the other. | ||
| They finally released the explosion, the three frames. | ||
| There's no plane. | ||
| Well, there's something that hits it. | ||
| It looks like a missile. | ||
|
unidentified
|
There's no wreckage. | |
| But is it... | ||
| There's no wreckage? | ||
| Isn't there... | ||
| Why haven't I... Haven't I seen photos? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, little pieces of... | |
| No, what you do is you see photos... | ||
| There's like wings and wheels. | ||
| No, you see... | ||
|
unidentified
|
What you see is a photo up close of like some machine thing, like up close. | |
| That's not what I want to see. | ||
| I want to see a picture, a backpack, the whole front lawn where everything's all fucked up and there's suitcases and there's tennis shoes and there's shit that you see and there's been plenty of planes wrecking. | ||
| They know what plane wreckage looks like. | ||
| You see fucking seats... | ||
| So you think they just came back and sprinkled some shit down? | ||
| No, because it happened immediately. | ||
| I remember when it was going on, they showed pictures. | ||
| Well, no, no. | ||
| When you think about what got blown up in the Pentagon the day before 9-1-1, Donald Rumsfeld goes on. | ||
| That's awesome from the Jesse Ventura show. | ||
| You can also see it on YouTube. | ||
| Donald Rumsfeld the day before 9-1-1. | ||
| He has a press conference explaining how we just found out that the enemy is within. | ||
| Somewhere in the Pentagon we have the enemy and we're going to find out. | ||
| It turns out we're $2.3 trillion. | ||
| $2.3 trillion are missing from the Pentagon. | ||
| So we need a... | ||
| That's what they just figured out in accounting. | ||
| That's what he's just talking about. | ||
| The day before. | ||
| Next day, fucking 911 goes down. | ||
| A missile blows up the accounting office. | ||
| And all the accountants. | ||
| Well, there's photos. | ||
| Isn't that strange? | ||
| Isn't that fishy? | ||
| If this was a CISI episode, you would definitely look at that, right? | ||
| That's some fishy shit. | ||
| Brian, do me a favor and pull up that Jesse Ventura conspiracy theory thing. | ||
| It's on YouTube. | ||
| Go to YouTube and write Jesse Ventura Conspiracy Pentagon. | ||
| Dude, they blew up the accounting office and the accountants, dude. | ||
| The ones that just figured out that we were, that they, whatever they did, they swindled $2.3 trillion. | ||
| Yeah, Jesse Ventura, conspiracy theory, Donald Rumsfeld. | ||
| I want to know how they steal it. | ||
| Pentagon. | ||
| Yeah, when let me see if this is the one This was a see see when you put all that shit together you put all that shit together like to what the fuck you guys up to? | ||
|
unidentified
|
You guys have to know good here. | |
| I've been governor. | ||
| A Navy SEAL. | ||
| A fighter. | ||
| Oh, we don't have to hear this part. | ||
|
unidentified
|
The things that'll blow you up. | |
| I just like hearing... | ||
| Is this the clip we're looking for? | ||
| Is this the whole episode? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't know. | |
| Oh yeah, this is the whole episode, dude. | ||
| We can't do this. | ||
| What are you looking for? | ||
| I just want the one Donald Rumsfeld quote. | ||
| Oh yeah, just put Donald Rumsfeld 9-10-01. | ||
| Put that shit on. | ||
| Let's listen to that. | ||
| What do you got to say about that? | ||
| Next day, the only part of the Pentagon that's blown up is the accounting office? | ||
| Brian, just try to find that shit. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I know it's Donald Rumsfeld. | ||
| This might be it. | ||
| Six minutes long, though. | ||
| No, that's not it. | ||
| You'd have to... | ||
| Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld has a press conference where he reports that they have simply lost 2.3 trillion dollars. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They don't have receipts for it. | |
| They don't know where it went. | ||
| Do you recall that? | ||
| The day before 9-11? | ||
| Well, if you don't, that's what happened. | ||
| According to some estimates, we cannot track $2.3 trillion in transactions. | ||
| And how ironic that the exact place that was struck in the Pentagon was where all those records were supposedly had to be. | ||
| Now all destroyed. | ||
| So I guess the $2.3 trillion, we as taxpayers just say, c'est la vie. | ||
| Now, isn't that a bit much? | ||
| I have no idea. | ||
| Did he just punch him? | ||
| Punched her in the pussy, I think. | ||
| I have no idea. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Well, you know, the government... | |
| The government has a tremendous propensity for secrecy, and the Defense Department and others do as well. | ||
| You believe that? | ||
| The lawyer admits our government's still hiding the truth from you and me. | ||
| There was no rubble outside. | ||
| But there was. | ||
|
unidentified
|
All there was was a hole. | |
| What happened to where the wings hit? | ||
| Ask that question to our 9-11 Commission staffer who was the only survivor from that room who made it out. | ||
| I did talk to April Gallup, who was actually inside the room in the Pentagon, and she looked me in the eye and told me unequivocally, I saw nothing that indicated a plane hit the Pentagon. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I felt that a bomb had exploded. | |
| Their witnesses could always have different versions of different things. | ||
| Well, that's a ridiculous statement. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Hold on. | |
| Kill it. | ||
| You've asked me a lot of questions that indicate Of course you would feel like a bomb hit it. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Any kind of loud explosion. | ||
| I mean, it really is like a bomb. | ||
| What is a bomb? | ||
| It's an explosion. | ||
| That's what fucking happens when a plane flies into a fucking building. | ||
| That is an explosion. | ||
| That's like watching Steven Seagal rape somebody. | ||
| You saw the footage of the by-frames that they released. | ||
| There's no plane there. | ||
| That chick, you put it all together. | ||
| It's so hard to see what that is. | ||
| So hard to see what that is. | ||
| Which is why they released it. | ||
| But there's photos also. | ||
| It's weird. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Come on, man. | |
| It's weird that a plane... | ||
| That's ridiculous shit. | ||
| It's weird that a plane... | ||
| They've had people try to emulate that physical force of pulling a plane into those Gs. | ||
| They haven't been able to do it. | ||
| If you put it all together, Donald Rumsfeld, the day before, talking about they just figured out their $2.3 million is missing, and then they blow it up. | ||
| Come on. | ||
| Hey, Brian, do me a favor and pull this up. | ||
| Pull up... | ||
|
unidentified
|
What was the exact phrase that it was? | |
| Oh, a flight simulator 9-1-1 Pentagon fail. | ||
| Yeah, good. | ||
| The guy keeps trying it over and over again on a flight simulator, and he can't get it to work. | ||
| It's too hard. | ||
| It's just too hard. | ||
| He can't do it. | ||
| They have expert pilots trying to do it. | ||
| They can't do it. | ||
| That thing was flying inches off the ground. | ||
| What if it hit? | ||
| Well, the other thing is, what if whatever hit, what if it was under remote control? | ||
| What if there was a way to do it manually, like with a remote control that a person physically couldn't do flying a plane? | ||
| A person physically couldn't control it? | ||
| Yeah, that's what they're saying. | ||
| That's the reasoning. | ||
| There's so much shit, dude. | ||
| There's other layers to that. | ||
| The NORAD, they just ignored all that shit. | ||
| For they had to stand down for some reason. | ||
| Dude, there's just so much shit. | ||
| You could do three hours on it. | ||
| It's all a big fuck-up. | ||
| They fucked up. | ||
| And they knew they could fuck up, and they knew no one was going to stop them. | ||
| No one was going to stop them. | ||
| It could be mass incompetence, too, mixed in with some fuckery. | ||
| It could be a little bit of both, you know what I'm saying? | ||
| It could be some fuckery mixed with just real government incompetence in action. | ||
| And then that all led into all the bullshit in the Middle East. | ||
| It was all bullshit weapons of mass destruction. | ||
| All that. | ||
| They're on TV in front of the world, lying their ass off, and they know they can get away with it. | ||
| And George W. Bush and Obama, they're all in the same fucking bed, man. | ||
| They're all just lying their asses off. | ||
| Obama is the biggest fucking liar out there. | ||
| That guy's just full of shit. | ||
| When he was running for the presidency, he had posters of Che Guevara in his office. | ||
| Oh, man, he fooled me right there. | ||
| I'm like, damn, the guy's a Che Guevara fan? | ||
| That's a fucking revolution. | ||
| Yeah, meanwhile, he's been one of the worst people we've ever had as far as taking away civil liberties. | ||
| I mean, that's not a melodramatic statement, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
| If you look up the National Defense Authorization Act and look up this new one that makes it illegal illegal, It's a felony to protest near a Secret Service agent. | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
| And Obama was for it, huh? | ||
| Peaceful protest. | ||
| He fucking signed it, man. | ||
| Peaceful protest. | ||
| What about all that weed talk in the beginning? | ||
| Oh, if I'm president, I'm going to push for legalization. | ||
| The whole weed community, the whole culture, the whole business, they were all behind Obama. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| They thought Obama was going to be the one to push it through, make it legal across the board, legal adult use. | ||
| What do you think it is? | ||
| They got behind Obama. | ||
| They were fighting for him the whole week. | ||
| And then he turned his back. | ||
| But it was all planned anyways. | ||
| It wasn't like all of a sudden he became just an evil fuck. | ||
| That's been planned. | ||
| This is all planned. | ||
| This is all bullshit. | ||
| They're slowly taking away our freedoms, day by day, in increments, and we're all just sitting there watching it fucking go, and no one's even paying attention. | ||
| It's really amazing. | ||
| This is all you need to know, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
| Really, just put this into your head. | ||
| Anybody that's trying to take away your right to peacefully protest is not your friend. | ||
| They're not looking out for you. | ||
| They don't want you to be able to talk about the shit job they're doing. | ||
| They want it to all just sink in like the evening news with a big fucking stupid smile on their face. | ||
| That's not good. | ||
| There's no way to rationalize it. | ||
| It's not American. | ||
| It's against the Constitution. | ||
| But does it surprise you? | ||
| No, it doesn't surprise me. | ||
| I'm not surprised at all. | ||
| Look, man, I've been watching this Game of Thrones. | ||
| You ever watch that show? | ||
| No. | ||
| Oh, dude, I'm hardcore addicted. | ||
| I'm only like five episodes in, but I'm hardcore addicted. | ||
| It's all like, it's based on this fantasy land, this Middle Earth, you know, like, where winter is like fucking ten years long, and summer is like nine years long, and there's dragons, and... | ||
| But... | ||
| My point was, these motherfuckers are just constantly trying to jack each other to get better positions. | ||
| They're constantly worrying about being jacked by some other people coming over the hill. | ||
| They're constantly worried about getting fucked up by the dudes from the north who want back their land. | ||
| There's no difference between now and then. | ||
| We're not used to seeing dudes sword fight in the street like they were back then, but there's not that much difference between now and then. | ||
| It's all just done through different machinery and different language and different methodologies and different governments working together to do it and do it as non-violently as possible. | ||
| But when the shit hits the fan, the boys hit the shore, guns in hand, and fucking tanks rolling over the ground because somehow or another there's some shit going down in Afghanistan that it's really important that we're there to stop it. | ||
| We've got to stop Afghanistan. | ||
| What? | ||
| What? | ||
| I mean, it's so transparent, so clean. | ||
| There's really no room for it to be anything other than what it is. | ||
| It's like, oop, there you go. | ||
| Do you think it's a ridiculous war? | ||
| Do you think the whole time we're going to attack North Korea soon? | ||
| No. | ||
| You don't think so? | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| I think North Korea needs food, man. | ||
| Those people can't even get their rockets launched. | ||
| They've failed a couple of different rocket launches. | ||
| I think we're going to war again soon, very soon. | ||
| Because I've been hearing a lot of people being called to shore, or called to duty. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| A lot of people. | ||
| Like, it's weird. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Where have you been hearing this? | ||
| Maybe I just made it all up. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Am I allowed to talk about that? | |
| Probably not, right? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I don't know, man. | ||
| That's some dark shit when you know somebody's about to get called up. | ||
| There's somebody I know that's like 45 and he's been out of it for a while and they call him back. | ||
| This ain't starship troopers, man. | ||
| It's not like the bugs are coming and we gotta fight them off, okay? | ||
| This is other people. | ||
| There's other people on the other side of the world rocking it however the fuck they do. | ||
| And for whatever reason, we gotta go in and interject and fuck with their way of life and fuck with their existence. | ||
| It's crazy. | ||
| It's really crazy. | ||
| That's not what our patriotic Americans that are serving because they really want to help this country. | ||
| That's not what they deserve. | ||
| What they deserve is to be involved in just wars only. | ||
| What they deserve is to be at home And to be with their fucking families and not have to use our resources to keep them over in some spot where they don't fucking need to be. | ||
| It's nonsense. | ||
| You're not going to fix Afghanistan. | ||
| You're out of your fucking mind. | ||
| That place is crazy. | ||
| There's one city, Kabul, and warlords everywhere. | ||
| They're like mountains and shit. | ||
| You ever see the videos of the troops bring back? | ||
| Shit, like home movies, the mountains of Afghanistan. | ||
|
unidentified
|
God! | |
| Goddamn! | ||
| That is crazy! | ||
| They're like in some nutty Lord of the Rings movie over there. | ||
| Nobody's fixing Afghanistan. | ||
| Get out of there. | ||
| It's just another Vietnam. | ||
| It's another thing that we're going to regret. | ||
| The sooner they get out of there, the better. | ||
| But they never will. | ||
| They never will because they're in it for the money. | ||
| And that's why it's so transparent. | ||
| Do you really think that anybody high up with the real green light power thinks that they're trying to help Afghanistan? | ||
| I think money's the bottom line. | ||
| The heroin, the oil, all that kind of shit. | ||
| That's all involved. | ||
| They do help, and that help they use to justify what they're doing over there. | ||
| I mean, they can do that. | ||
| I think eventually Iraq will be in a better position. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Well, you know what? | ||
| I don't even say that now, because we left, right? | ||
| The United States is officially leaving Iraq. | ||
| There's only going to be a few thousand soldiers or something there. | ||
| Isn't that the case? | ||
| I think that's right. | ||
| And I think the only reason those people are there is because we bought all that property from Iraq. | ||
| We bought property from you. | ||
| Isn't that hilarious if we could even say that? | ||
| That can't be true, right? | ||
| No. | ||
| Do we buy it? | ||
| Yeah, we always buy it. | ||
| We always go to countries and buy properties. | ||
| And buy properties and put up a base. | ||
| Boom. | ||
| What a nutty country we are. | ||
| It's fascinating times, man. | ||
| It's fascinating times. | ||
| There's going to have to be some sort of a fucking mass awakening, though. | ||
| There's no way we can keep up this ridiculous, psychotic pace with all the access to information that we have. | ||
| The only way we're going to get there is we've got to get into question mode. | ||
| Start questioning everything. | ||
| Don't accept everything. | ||
| Look into it. | ||
| Even if it turns out to be totally benign, look into it. | ||
| There's some fucking fishy shit going on. | ||
| Yeah, but resources, too. | ||
| Look into it. | ||
| Question shit. | ||
| Don't just accept shit. | ||
| Don't think that your government is out for your best interests. | ||
| It's not that way at all. | ||
| Politicians are just at the high levels. | ||
| They're just getting theirs, and they don't care who's in their way. | ||
| The real problem is resources. | ||
| The real problem is there's a lot of people out there that don't have any fucking opportunity for employment. | ||
| There's fucking not much, man. | ||
| And the United States Army, Marines, Air Force, what have you, is the best career option for them. | ||
| And that's legit. | ||
| That's legit in a lot of parts of this country, man. | ||
| There's some parts of this country where dudes are trying to find a way out, you know? | ||
| And when the Marines come along and offer you guidance and discipline and a way to pay for college, you know, for a lot of dudes, that's helped them. | ||
| I know a lot of people that it's changed them for the better. | ||
| Until they use you. | ||
| Until wars break out. | ||
| Because I remember dudes, when dudes joined the Marines when there was no war. | ||
| That was a different sort of experience. | ||
| That was a guy who would join the Marines to toughen up. | ||
| But once war started happening, man, that's a completely different gig. | ||
| Because now you're actually going to go and you're going to be involved in some insane one-on-one combat where you're shooting guns at each other. | ||
| I mean, that's more than likely going to happen. | ||
| Can you imagine? | ||
| There's so few resources that that's a viable career option for a lot of people. | ||
| But it is. | ||
| You know? | ||
| We're lucky it's not us. | ||
| But it is for some folks. | ||
| And that fucking sucks. | ||
| And I think a lot of that is because so much shit gets made in other countries now. | ||
| There's not nearly the manufacturing base that America once had. | ||
| Especially with like cars and shit. | ||
| You know, we used to have like the dopest cars in the world. | ||
| You know, America had like, you know, back in the day when, you know, GM and Ford would like do battle to have like the coolest cars were like Mustangs and Camaros. | ||
| We made some cool ass shit. | ||
| But slowly but surely that just fucking fell apart. | ||
| Slowly but surely that just crumbled and tumbled. | ||
| Did you ever see Roger and me? | ||
| The Michael Moore movie about Flint, Michigan? | ||
| No. | ||
| GM closes a plant in Flint, Michigan? | ||
| Dude, it's dark. | ||
| It's a dark fucking movie. | ||
| It's brilliant. | ||
| And it's all about Michael Moore trying to find out, like he tries to get an interview with this guy who was the head of GM and find out why he did that and see what he did to this town when... | ||
| He pulled out. | ||
| I don't know if he lied to them or something happened and these people just were totally, completely unprepared for this. | ||
| And he just simply abandoned it. | ||
| And the whole town is like, it's just crazy to watch how poor people were, man. | ||
| People were selling bunnies for food or pets. | ||
| And like, you know, so you would say food and the lady like grabs the bunny. | ||
| Like she's got this bunny in her lap and she's petting it. | ||
| And you say food and she grabs the bunny by the fucking back of the head, breaks its neck. | ||
| And then just cuts it open right on camera and she's doing this. | ||
| It's like, wow. | ||
| That's in the movie? | ||
| Yep. | ||
| I couldn't watch that. | ||
| I know you couldn't. | ||
| That's why I'm telling you about it right now. | ||
| How is the bunny? | ||
| Because I know you're in love with bunnies. | ||
| But you know how lovable bunnies are? | ||
| So this lady's touching this bunny, and then when they say food or pets, she says food, so she kills it. | ||
| When you think about that life gets that hard, where you have this cute little bunny, and you're like, alright, it's snapping its neck, time to eat it. | ||
| That's like, you're getting down, that's an animalistic sort of a vibe you're getting into. | ||
| You're getting into this weird, you know, that's a weird world you're living in, man. | ||
| You're eating your pets. | ||
| I mean, that thing is, you know, that's dark. | ||
| There's one thing to separate. | ||
| We separate like the chickens are outside and I'm going to eat those chickens. | ||
| My dog, I'm not going to eat my dog. | ||
| You know, there's one thing. | ||
| But when you're eating your dog, too, you've gone into the dark zone. | ||
| You know, you've gone into this weird desperation mode. | ||
| You're eating pets. | ||
| Don't read of Mice and Men either, Eddie. | ||
| Yeah, there's a lot of that too. | ||
| George is not good with the rabbits. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I wonder if there's hobos out there that eat dogs. | |
| Oh yeah, I'm sure they do, brother. | ||
| I'm sure they do. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right? | |
| No doubt, man. | ||
| No doubt. | ||
| Yeah, they eat dogs. | ||
| Did you hear about, we were in Florida this weekend. | ||
| Fort Lauderdale, me and Duncan had a great fucking time. | ||
| Awesome crowds. | ||
| Thank you everybody that came out. | ||
| We had a fucking blast. | ||
| But when we were down there, a dog had gotten eaten in the Florida Keys recently by a crocodile. | ||
| A crocodile took a 65-pound Labrador. | ||
| It flew four feet out of the water and snatched it off of like a wall. | ||
| It probably happens a lot down there, right? | ||
| This dog was barking. | ||
| I don't know, man. | ||
| I think this is pretty rare. | ||
| It's a big dog. | ||
| See, crocodiles are so much more dangerous. | ||
| They go after shit. | ||
| That's what people don't understand. | ||
| In Florida, when I was a kid, I lived in Gainesville, and we would feed the alligators marshmallows and shit. | ||
| And they would ask you to please don't feed the alligator's marshmallows because marshmallows get in their digestive tract. | ||
| Meanwhile, these alligators would kill people's dogs. | ||
| They would kill old ladies' dogs. | ||
| I was there when it happened once. | ||
| Either it happened right before we were there or right after we were there, but my parents were really freaked out that an alligator ate a fucking ladies' dog. | ||
| She was walking along by the water and the thing just came out and snatched her dog from her. | ||
| But crocodiles will chase people. | ||
| Crocodiles will chase you. | ||
| They go after shit. | ||
| They're way more aggressive. | ||
| It's a completely different animal. | ||
| Alligators sit, and they'll just sit and wait for something to fuck up. | ||
| So that dog must have fucked up. | ||
| That dog just got too close. | ||
| But a crocodile will chase that fucking dog and might just jack the old lady. | ||
| You know, they eat people. | ||
| No problem. | ||
| This one flew four feet in the air to kill a dog. | ||
| It's amazing that people would want to keep those around. | ||
| You can't even shoot them. | ||
| They're protected. | ||
| What? | ||
| You don't think that's dangerous? | ||
| Don't you guys have kids? | ||
| You want to keep this fucking... | ||
| It's not like crocodiles are going to go extinct. | ||
| If you want them, go to Africa. | ||
| Go look at them real quick and then come back home. | ||
| Let's kill all the crocodiles we have here. | ||
| Are you crazy? | ||
| Let's make belts out of those bitches. | ||
| Fuck crocodiles. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Let it fuck up the ecosystem. | |
| What are you talking about? | ||
| We are fucking up the Florida ecosystem, though. | ||
| They got a real problem, man, with pythons, those stupid fucks. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| They release pythons and they get too big. | ||
| And then the fucking Everglades is like infested with giant pythons. | ||
| Dude, we flew over the Everglades, and when we landed, it was early in the morning. | ||
| Not early, you know, like 9, 9 a.m. | ||
| And as we're flying in, I'm like looking out, like out over the window. | ||
| It's beautiful. | ||
|
unidentified
|
But the fucking Everglades are huge! | |
| It's just all swamp. | ||
| Like a big part of Florida is all just like water and trees growing out of the water and fucking giant snakes. | ||
| Giant 20 foot long pythons that are eating alligators. | ||
| They're so big they're eating alligators. | ||
| There's a photo of a fucking python with an alligator burst out of its stomach. | ||
| So basically the Everglades are like the Amazon. | ||
| Well, it's kind of scarier than the Amazon because it's almost all water. | ||
| A lot of it is water. | ||
| It's like where we were flying over. | ||
| It's like swampy. | ||
| It's almost creepier than the Amazon. | ||
| I don't know, man. | ||
| They're both fucked up. | ||
| I guess the Amazon probably has more poisonous shit. | ||
| Would you go to the Amazon? | ||
| I would go to the Everglades before I'd go to the Amazon. | ||
| Because I know a lot of the good old boys from Florida, they'll fuck around in the Everglades. | ||
| They get those boats with the fan behind it, and they fish in the Everglades. | ||
| I'm totally fascinated with looking at Amazon DVDs and documentaries about the Amazon, but I have no desire to ever go... | ||
| Swim in the rivers and shit like that. | ||
| I'm so not a jungle guy. | ||
| You remember when I first got this house and we sat and I got a little theater room and we watched the documentaries from the BBC on the Amazon where you see that fucking crazy bird eat that ancient dinosaur fish. | ||
| That was the Congo. | ||
| We talked about this before. | ||
| Remember what an impact that video had on you? | ||
| Just think about how ridiculous it would be to go to any sort of a rainforest. | ||
| Congo, the Amazon, just to be dropped off in that shit. | ||
| The Congo's the craziest, definitely. | ||
| People live in the Amazon. | ||
| I don't think there's a whole lot of people living in the Everglades. | ||
| I think there's probably some parts of the Everglades we could drive to and live in, but it looked to me like there was a lot of it that would look pretty goddamn wild. | ||
| Maybe I'm just talking out of my ass. | ||
| I think there's a lot of people that live around the South. | ||
| Isn't there a show on Swamp People? | ||
| Yeah, something like that. | ||
| People kept wanting to get me to go there, though. | ||
|
unidentified
|
A lot of people I met were like, dude, you gotta come out to the fucking Everglades with us, man. | |
| Come on, we party out there, dude. | ||
| We do some fucking mushrooms. | ||
| You know what's scary is people that live in the desert. | ||
| That's hilarious. | ||
| They party in Florida, dude. | ||
| Florida parties hard. | ||
| They fucking party hard. | ||
| Those were wild crowds. | ||
| I told them, and this is true, it was like the perfect crowd to get me ready for next week or for this week now. | ||
| You just played Fort Lauderdale? | ||
| Yeah, I just did the improv in Fort Lauderdale. | ||
| Fuck, it was fun, man. | ||
| Great crowds. | ||
| But they're so wild. | ||
| They're just crazy, man. | ||
| Two out of three shows, a girl would stand up and say some crazy shit. | ||
| It was a bunch of really wild heckler experiences. | ||
| But they were fun. | ||
| They were really nice people, man. | ||
| It was a good time. | ||
| Good goddamn time. | ||
| But they live in a tropical country, man. | ||
| Florida, that's a goddamn tropical country. | ||
| South Florida, you know? | ||
| This is the Keys, where the dog got eaten by the crocodile. | ||
| That's really, like, a tropical country. | ||
| I mean, that's, like, you gotta drive to them over, like, a bridge. | ||
| You know, that's not even really connected. | ||
| I just got back from the desert and it was really weird seeing about the people that lived in the desert. | ||
| The roads were not maintained so you just go through these dirt roads and it looked like every single person that's a hoarder, the rich hoarders get to come out here because every house seemed like a hoarder house from just the outside. | ||
| And there was parts where I couldn't go because there was these dogs that would come in the street and block you and they just wouldn't leave. | ||
| You couldn't drive through them. | ||
| It was fucking weird, man, that The desert is weird. | ||
| What part of the desert are you talking about? | ||
| Joshua Tree. | ||
| Yeah, but Duncan's always trying to get me to go to Joshua Tree. | ||
| He might be trying to rape me. | ||
| Yeah, he might be. | ||
| But actually, there's this place that we went to that was really, really cool. | ||
| And there's like these 12 AeroStream trailers. | ||
| And each one of these trailers have been remodeled and gutted out. | ||
| Like I stayed in the 70s one. | ||
| My friend stayed in the one that was like all like 80s, like 1980s type shit. | ||
| Right. | ||
| archery shooting guns and they have one of those big teepees where you go in there and do drugs and stuff and like even on the book it's like people are like you know how they sign like hey had a great time you know they have like a book that you can sign in every one of these trailers and everyone was like dude had the best shroom trip ever like i'm tripping my ass off right now | ||
| this is what my mom looks like like just drawing pictures and the whole place seemed badass and i thought how cool would it be to rent out every single one of these trailers and just have like a big party with all your friends. | ||
| Because that's what it was. | ||
| It was designed for you just to go there and experience psychedelics, and it was the coolest thing. | ||
| That's what Joshua Tree was designed for? | ||
| That's this place I stayed at. | ||
| There's a lot of that up there, right? | ||
| It's so amazing. | ||
| There's so many different places like that. | ||
| Wow, I never heard of it. | ||
| I used to go to Joshua Tree as a kid all the time with the Boy Scouts. | ||
| I used to go all the time. | ||
| But never on mushrooms. | ||
| I brought my dogs. | ||
| Can you go in that big room and sing? | ||
| You can do whatever the fuck you want, man. | ||
| It's designed for you. | ||
| And the biggest thing is, it made me really realize that I could live in one of those AeroStreams if I want. | ||
| Like, I could almost live there. | ||
| Like, those are so nice, how big they are. | ||
| Do you have internet? | ||
| Yeah, I had internet. | ||
| We had hot tub, pools, ping pong tables. | ||
| Yeah, you could live in something like that. | ||
| My friend Guido that I was talking about earlier, he lived in like a big mobile home type thing. | ||
| Without internet, would you still do it? | ||
| Without internet? | ||
| Fuck that. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| But that's cool because you can move wherever you want to live. | ||
| I know that Malibu has this really nice place that you can just park your AeroStream and rent the spot per month. | ||
| I forget, what's his name? | ||
| The guy from... | ||
| Oh, right, oh, right, oh, right. | ||
| That guy. | ||
| What? | ||
| The girls keep getting younger and I keep on saying the same age. | ||
| What's that guy's name? | ||
| Matt McConaughey. | ||
| Matt McConaughey? | ||
| Matt McConaughey? | ||
| Yeah, he rented a place in Malibu where he had his trailers. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Didn't he live in a trailer for a while while he was a movie star? | ||
| I think he still does. | ||
| No, I don't think so, man. | ||
| He's married now. | ||
| He had a little cameo in the season finale of Eastbound and Down. | ||
| Oh my god, I saw that. | ||
| His cameo was awesome. | ||
| I'm not a giant Matthew McConaughey fan, but he killed it. | ||
| That was his best performance. | ||
| He's brilliant. | ||
| I think Matthew McConaughey is great. | ||
| Yeah, you know, Tropic Thunder, he was great. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| He's great in everything. | ||
| He's got this, like... | ||
| He was great in... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, wait. | |
| No, he wasn't in that movie. | ||
| Wouldn't it be great to smoke weed with him? | ||
| Yeah, without a doubt. | ||
| I was going to say he was great in that Dragon movie, but he wasn't in that Dragon movie. | ||
| Tropic Thunder, he killed it. | ||
| For whatever reason, I thought he was in that Christian Bale movie about dragons, but he wasn't. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Hmm. | |
| Dragon movie. | ||
| Huh. | ||
| You know who killed it? | ||
| I saw that Hunger Games. | ||
| See that Hunger Games? | ||
| No, I haven't seen it yet. | ||
| Woody Harrelson. | ||
| He's a bad motherfucker. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Was it good? | |
| It's not a bad movie. | ||
| It's kind of fun. | ||
| I saw Cabin in the Woods. | ||
| The worst garbage ever. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No way. | |
| I've been hearing that was good. | ||
| Somebody just told me to see that. | ||
| Oh, God. | ||
| What's it about? | ||
| It's terrible. | ||
| What is it about? | ||
| What's it about? | ||
| A Cabin in the Woods, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's pretty much what the movie's about. | ||
| Is it like Evil Dead or something? | ||
| It's way worse than you can imagine. | ||
| Describe it. | ||
| You want me to tell you about it? | ||
| Fuck yeah. | ||
| I don't want to blow it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Don't spoil it. | |
| Why? | ||
| If it sucks, blow it. | ||
| Does it really suck? | ||
| Do you really feel like it sucks? | ||
| It's about some god who has actual human scientists working for him to sacrifice virgins. | ||
| So the way these scientists get to sacrifice virgins is they got like CIA connections where they somehow coordinate three guys and two girls to take a trip out in the cabin in the woods for a weekend and party. | ||
| And then while they're out there, it's all an experiment. | ||
| It's all like fenced off electronically. | ||
| So these scientists are all programming. | ||
| They think they're just going out to a cabin to swim in the lake. | ||
| But they're part of a sacrifice. | ||
| And one of them is a virgin. | ||
| And... | ||
| They decide, based on what they do, there's like some magic books that they read in the cellar. | ||
| Based on what they read, they decide how they're going to die. | ||
| Are they going to have the zombies attack them? | ||
| Ghosts attack them? | ||
| Girls with no face, just a mouth attack them? | ||
| There's every giant cobras. | ||
| They're all in little boxes. | ||
| Every monster you could think of is in a little box under the lake and And based on what they read, they got the zombies, like mountain men that were killed and now they're zombies and they come out after you with horse traps and axes. | ||
| There's like three, a family. | ||
| And like the scientists are all betting, it's a comedy. | ||
| The scientists are all betting, there's like 20 scientists that are all betting on what monsters are they going to release based on reading this magic book. | ||
| So, you know, there's $100 on the zombies. | ||
| They got the fucking giant cobra. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They got the ghost. | |
| They got the guy with the saw head. | ||
| They got all these... | ||
| They're all betting on all these monsters and goblins and ghouls. | ||
| Sounds like a movie you actually would like, Joe. | ||
| That might be my favorite movie ever. | ||
| Dude, it's ridiculous. | ||
| And the scientists are all working and guess who the main director is that communicates with the gods? | ||
| Sigourney Weaver. | ||
|
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|
Sigourney Weaver makes a cameo in the worst movie ever. | |
| It was like a Las Vegas appearance for her or something. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| It's like, Jesus Christ! | ||
|
unidentified
|
It was terrible! | |
| Celebrity apprentice? | ||
| It was terrible! | ||
| Oh, that's funny. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It was ridiculous! | |
| How is that possible that they got her? | ||
| I guess they must have just offered her some mad loot. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Dude, she had some tax problems. | |
| She was just an avatar, man. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
|
unidentified
|
She was an avatar. | |
| She didn't read the script. | ||
| She's from Alien. | ||
| You know what? | ||
| They gave her another script. | ||
| I think that's one of those movies that we're going to disagree on. | ||
| She thought she was doing Alien 5. It was just amazing. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Whoa. | |
| Hold on, Brian. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Go watch it. | |
| It was a comedy. | ||
| It was a comedy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Trust me. | |
| It was a comedy. | ||
| And I'm not even joking. | ||
| It was a comedy. | ||
| It was hilarious. | ||
| How high were you inside? | ||
| I was pretty high. | ||
| Had a glass of wine. | ||
|
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|
You know what I mean? | |
| I was ready to enjoy this shit. | ||
| Right, right. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It was really... | |
| But you've never been one for fantasy-type movies. | ||
| It's just ridiculous. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It was ridiculous. | |
| I like a lot of ridiculous movies. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I like superhero movies. | ||
| Do you like superhero movies? | ||
| No. | ||
|
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|
If I know the guy's gonna live, I don't want to see this shit. | |
| Every superhero movie's the same. | ||
| There's seven or eight moments where he's about to die, and then you know he's not gonna die. | ||
| Yeah, I know. | ||
| I know it's a superhero movie. | ||
| I'm not into that, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm not into that. | |
| Dude, did you see The Watchmen? | ||
| Yes, I did. | ||
| That's a good superhero movie because it's sort of an anti-superhero movie. | ||
| Yeah, that was pretty good. | ||
| For a superhero movie, that was alright. | ||
| That was a great movie. | ||
| If they're wearing tights and they got capes and they're flying and shit like that, that's hard for me. | ||
|
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|
It's badass. | |
| That's what I like. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I know it could really happen, but... | ||
| Iron Man was the shit, dude. | ||
| You didn't like Iron Man? | ||
| That was cool because that could really happen. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| Because he's like a machine. | ||
| It's like a machine, you know what I mean? | ||
| Iron Man was cool because it was believable. | ||
| Yo, dude, the guy made a nuclear reactor and stuck it in his chest. | ||
| That shit ain't real. | ||
| Get the fuck out of here. | ||
| Get the fuck out of here. | ||
| You're like Iron Man. | ||
| It's totally possible. | ||
| Batman's more possible than Iron Man. | ||
|
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|
No, I think Iron Man's more possible than Iron Man. | |
| No way. | ||
| Iron Man is a regular human being. | ||
| Batman's just a super yoked dude. | ||
| He would've been dead a long time ago. | ||
| If Andre Orlovsky, when he was in his prime, if Andre Orlovsky was in his prime... | ||
| When he was, he could have been a real live Batman. | ||
| Too many times was he tied up, and then at the last second he gets out. | ||
|
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|
Okay, you know, that's a goddamn Batman. | |
| That's possible. | ||
| You're having a blue thing in your chest. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, it's much more possible than having a nuclear reactor for a heart. | |
| And he's reaching in, and he's having the fucking, what's-her-face? | ||
| Gwyneth Paltrow? | ||
| Gwyneth Paltrow, reach in there and pull the wires out. | ||
| That's preposterous. | ||
| Well, they all suck. | ||
| Fuck Iron Man. | ||
| I don't give a shit. | ||
| I ain't wearing no Iron Man t-shirt. | ||
| I thought it was a height. | ||
| I like Robert Downey Jr. You wouldn't wear an Iron Man t-shirt? | ||
| I have a Captain America t-shirt. | ||
| I'm not into comics, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Respect. | |
| I'm not into comics. | ||
| I love comic books. | ||
| I'm not into it. | ||
| I don't read them very often, man, but I tell you what, when I was a kid, they brought me great joy. | ||
| When I was a kid and I was moving around, we were moving around all over the country, the constant in my life, because when we moved a bunch of times, it takes a while to make friends. | ||
| You're in one place and then you move in two years and you're in another place. | ||
| Comic books were my constant buddy when I was a young kid. | ||
| So to me, I'll always have a special spot in my heart for comic books because I remember the effect that they had on me when I was a kid. | ||
| And that's undeniable. | ||
| To say now that I'm over that or that's ridiculous. | ||
| No, they're still cool. | ||
| They're still cool. | ||
| It's just there's other shit that's cooler for me to do with my time. | ||
| I really don't have that much time to devote to comic books, but I still love them. | ||
| Have you been to the comic book store lately? | ||
| No, but you know what I have done? | ||
| I really do like watching comics on my iPad. | ||
| I'll buy the Marvel comic series on my iPad. | ||
| They have quite a few that you can buy. | ||
| You'll be surprised how much you'll freak the fuck out, though, if you go inside a comic book store. | ||
| I mean, t-shirt-wise, toy-wise, comic-wise. | ||
| You'll go in there and be like, oh my god, look at this t-shirt. | ||
| Oh, look at this weird poster. | ||
| What I really love, though, is the way the iPad does it, where it's frame by frame. | ||
| Yeah, that's nice. | ||
| It's nice because it really, like, it's better. | ||
| It's better to read a comic book on an iPad than it is to read it in the actual form. | ||
| Because in the actual form, you can see all the shit that's going to happen on the next page. | ||
| There's this explosion, and it really ruins it. | ||
| But the iPad, it's dope. | ||
| Like, you don't see explosions coming, and you don't see anything coming. | ||
| It's nice. | ||
| The only comics I was into were the Hustler comics. | ||
|
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|
I was really into it. | |
| I thought Hustler had the best jokes. | ||
| Whoever was writing those jokes, that was a good quality comic. | ||
| That's some funny shit. | ||
| Playboy was not as funny, but Hustler had some great shit. | ||
| I would design flyers. | ||
| The bands I was in, the speed metal bands I was in, my thing was... | ||
| When you give out a flyer for your band, people just throw it away. | ||
| Go, how could I get them to keep it for a little bit? | ||
| I would design a flyer on top of a Hustler comic. | ||
| So I'm basically giving them a comic, and they're looking at some dude. | ||
| There's just one where there's a doctor walking in with a chick, and the doctor's telling the chick, we did what we could. | ||
| It was a really bad accident. | ||
| And they walk into the hospital, and there's a dude laying there with just a head, a dick, and a hand. | ||
| I used that as a flyer. | ||
| A head, a dick, and a hand? | ||
| Yeah, there's a dude lying there in the hospital bed. | ||
| He's just a head, a dick, And a hand. | ||
| I thought that was the funniest shit ever. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And the doctor's walking in with this chick. | |
| It was a horrible accident. | ||
| We did what we could. | ||
| Oh, God. | ||
| That's funny at all. | ||
| Oh, come on, man. | ||
| That was hustling. | ||
| Hey, bro, we're allowed to have different tastes. | ||
| We obviously do. | ||
| We're best friends. | ||
| We don't even agree with comic books. | ||
| But real comics, I never got into them, man. | ||
| I was a big Kiss fan. | ||
| They had Kiss comics. | ||
| I didn't read the Kiss comics. | ||
| I didn't read them. | ||
| I don't know why I wasn't into it. | ||
| You just don't like obvious heroes. | ||
| And I didn't like reading to begin with. | ||
| That was a big part of it. | ||
| I didn't read. | ||
| The only thing I read was magazines, like rock magazines. | ||
| I was totally into that. | ||
| Shark books, dinosaur books. | ||
| My parents gave me a lot of books when I was a kid. | ||
| I read a lot. | ||
| It was great. | ||
| That's how I got into comic books. | ||
| I read a lot of shit when I was a kid. | ||
| You know, like, again, if you don't have that many friends, you read. | ||
| Like when I was going to Taekwondo, for most of my life, I would take the tea in Boston. | ||
| Instead of to walk to the train and take the train in. | ||
| It's like, you know, 40 minutes or something like that. | ||
| I'd always read, you know, read, get a Stephen King book. | ||
| You know, when you get into a good book, man, it's fucking really fun, man. | ||
| A good Stephen King book, god damn, they're fun. | ||
| I never finished them. | ||
| Oh, dude. | ||
| I read half of it, and then I was like, I can't do it. | ||
| It is an amazing book. | ||
| God damn, Pet Sematary is a fucking great book. | ||
| The movie was fun, but god damn, that fucking book is good. | ||
| It's fun. | ||
| He just knows how to drag you in. | ||
| It's just entertainment, man. | ||
| A lot of times, to me, I find it much more enjoyable than watching some terrible movie. | ||
| A terrible movie won't engage me at all. | ||
| If it's a great movie, I would much rather prefer a great movie than to read a book. | ||
| But a lot of movies aren't great movies. | ||
| A lot of movies aren't alien. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| A lot of movies don't just fucking completely suck you in. | ||
| In that case, sometimes a book is way better than a shitty movie. | ||
| It's a way better experience. | ||
| There's a lot more great books. | ||
| Did you ever read King's Dark Tower or whatever that shit's called? | ||
| No. | ||
| I heard that's the best stuff. | ||
| Yeah, Duncan raves about that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| But those are daunting, dude. | ||
| Those are thousands of pages long. | ||
| You look at the whole Dark Tower series. | ||
| Stephen King was a bad motherfucker. | ||
| You want to talk about a dude who's put out a lot of work? | ||
| Holy shit is that guy prolific. | ||
| Who the hell writes more than Stephen King? | ||
| I mean, that guy's always got a new book coming out. | ||
| He's got another one coming out right now. | ||
| And he just constantly jams at it. | ||
| And he got fucked up by a car. | ||
| He got hit by a van. | ||
| Yeah, like bad, like broke bones all over his body several years ago. | ||
| He got fucked up, man. | ||
| It took a long time to rebuild him. | ||
| Many, many surgeries. | ||
| He was in incredible pain for a long period of time. | ||
| And then he started writing again. | ||
| Got right back into that shit. | ||
| Bam! | ||
| I'd like to see a documentary on that guy, like his childhood. | ||
| I wonder what it was like growing up. | ||
| Well, he's got a great book. | ||
| It's called Stephen King on Writing, I think it's called. | ||
| Is that the name? | ||
| I think that's it. | ||
| Just look up Stephen King's book on writing if you're interested in it. | ||
| But it's a great... | ||
| Shows you how pragmatic his thinking is. | ||
| He's very honest about what it was like when he was doing a lot of drinking and doing a lot of drugs that he would black out and not even remember a book that he wrote. | ||
| He's talked about several of his books. | ||
| He doesn't remember writing them because he was just fucked up. | ||
| But they're brilliant books, man. | ||
| He has a Mad Indian in him. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Carrie. | ||
| That's him. | ||
| That's a great fucking book. | ||
| Woo! | ||
| Maximum Overdrive is the best movie back in the day. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He's probably... | |
| Would you say he's the most famous writer? | ||
| He's got to be one of them. | ||
| He's got to be one of the most famous writers, I would imagine. | ||
| Other than William Shakespeare. | ||
| Who else? | ||
| Well, I mean, living, for sure. | ||
| He's one of the most famous living. | ||
| Who else would be famous? | ||
| I mean, you get into people like the woman who wrote Harry Potter. | ||
| She's probably really famous. | ||
| But Stephen King is so... | ||
| Judy Blume, motherfucker. | ||
| I know Harry Potter. | ||
| I know the name of the movies. | ||
| But I don't know the woman's name. | ||
| Yeah, Stephen King, like... | ||
| He's crazy famous. | ||
| Yeah, as far as, like, fame, he's probably the most easily recognizable name of a writer. | ||
| He's probably, if I had to say he's my all-time favorite fiction writer, I would say yes, I'd say he's number one. | ||
| He's the Michael Jackson of writing. | ||
| He's got so many, the Tommy Knockers, ooh, I loved that one, that was a great one. | ||
| It was a fucking long UFO crashed into this area like thousands of years ago and they dig into it and reactivate it or some shit and people get infected by these UFOs and start changing. | ||
| I forget the exact plot of it, but I remember it was one of my favorites. | ||
| I would be bummed out when my stop would come. | ||
| I wonder how he comes up with this shit. | ||
| Well, I'm sure he smokes a lot of weed because he talks about it. | ||
| He talks about how great the weed is in Maine and how it should be a cottage industry and the weed laws are ridiculous. | ||
| A lot of writers use weed. | ||
| I mean, we know that. | ||
| I mean, how many writers do we know that are just fiction writers, guys who write sitcoms, guys who write movies? | ||
| A lot of writers use weed. | ||
| So, of course, I'm sure he uses weed. | ||
| Jason Ellis has a new book, and it came out today, I think. | ||
| And he was on some interview earlier, and he was talking about how he's a cutter. | ||
| And he has this new thing where he meets this girl, and they cut each other, and they suck each other's blood. | ||
| And so he was talking about going on this book tour. | ||
| He's going to cut himself and then stamp, instead of signing it, he's going to start stamping it with his book. | ||
| He's so crazy. | ||
| That dude, the whole interview, I think it was Howard Stern, the whole interview was so fucking creepy. | ||
| I feel bad for that guy. | ||
| He's an odd guy. | ||
| His dad sucked his dick, and then he had to suck his dad's dick. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| Yeah, when he was like six. | ||
| What? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really? | |
| He's still alive? | ||
| No, I don't think so. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| Yeah. | ||
| Are you sure? | ||
| Yeah, it was all in this interview, man. | ||
| Who's this guy? | ||
| Jason Ellis. | ||
| Whoa. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Damn. | |
| Wow, that explains. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| No, it doesn't explain, because he's a lot more together than 99.99999% of the world who would have had that same experience happen to them. | ||
| He's a very successful guy. | ||
| A lot of people who have had that same experience would probably be wrecked. | ||
| Yeah, and he's sober, isn't he? | ||
| Yeah, he's sober. | ||
| He smokes a little, well, I don't know. | ||
| I think he's actually sober, yeah. | ||
| I think now he's completely sober. | ||
| I don't know, though. | ||
| I'd have to, I haven't done a show in a while. | ||
| And I'm not upset at that dude. | ||
| He thinks I'm upset at him because he prank called me once and I changed my number, but I wasn't upset. | ||
| I just automatically changed my number if someone gets it and starts prank calling me. | ||
| I did it automatically. | ||
| I wasn't upset at it. | ||
| I was like, oh, okay, whatever. | ||
| I didn't think it was particularly funny. | ||
| You gave out your number? | ||
| No, no, no, no, no. | ||
| He prank called me. | ||
| He prank called me and said some horrible Boston accent or something like that, and he did it on the air. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Was it good? | |
| Was it funny? | ||
| No. | ||
| Well, because I like him, I would have said it was funny. | ||
| If I knew it was him, I would think it was funny, because I like him. | ||
| But no, it wasn't that particularly funny. | ||
| But I didn't get upset. | ||
| I just changed my number. | ||
| He also talked about going to Amsterdam and getting a hooker. | ||
| And how it was a tranny, and he started getting something shoved up his ass like a dildo, and he was like, no, I don't want that! | ||
| And it was actually a cock of the tranny. | ||
| He didn't know it was a tranny hooker. | ||
| Oh, Jesus Christ. | ||
| Jesus. | ||
| Wow, a tranny hooker fucks you in the ass a little bit. | ||
| But he did want his book the style of, like, he just told somebody and they wrote it down. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| And he hasn't even read it yet. | ||
| Miss Thailand 2010 or something like that is a tranny. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Super hot. | ||
| They allowed her into Miss Universe. | ||
| Isn't that crazy? | ||
| She has a passport. | ||
| Is it Miss World? | ||
| What is it? | ||
| You guys talk about it on the podcast already? | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| Well, we showed pictures of her, man. | ||
| It's incredible. | ||
| She's really hot. | ||
| It's weird. | ||
| I guess they get the boys early before testosterone kicks in and they get them on hormone therapy. | ||
| Is that what it is? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yep. | |
| That's what they do with her? | ||
| I don't know if they did with her, but apparently, this is what I hear, I could be totally wrong, but in some Asian countries, they'll take a dude and get him on female hormones quick to make them money, like to survive. | ||
| Like, you're going to be a chick now and you're going to be a hooker. | ||
| There's one fucking story of these two lesbians that had this son. | ||
| I don't know if it was a natural birth son or an adopted son, I'm not sure. | ||
| But they had a son... | ||
| And I believe the kid was 10 and they wanted to get the kid ready for a gender reassignment because they said that the boy actually was saying that he was a girl. | ||
| That's probably what they say all the time. | ||
| They wanted him to wear dresses. | ||
| He would dress up like a girl. | ||
| And they were like, he's getting ready to become a girl. | ||
| And everybody's like, whoa. | ||
| You don't see the problem with this? | ||
| Whoa. | ||
| This does not give you a gigantic green light here for crazy. | ||
| The crazy express is wide open. | ||
| This person is saying that a 10-year-old wants a gender reassignment. | ||
| Jesus fucking Christ. | ||
| Really? | ||
| You know how nutty that is? | ||
| I bet that's just normal. | ||
| What is that kid's life like? | ||
| What is that kid's environment like? | ||
| You've got to make money. | ||
| But I mean, that's one of those things that you would think that someone would make up on some extreme, crazy right-wing site because it would make conservative people so fucking furious that this could happen, that someone could have this boy and at 10 years old be setting him up for gender reassignment. | ||
| What a fucking travesty that is. | ||
| It's almost like an obvious... | ||
| Attack on the gender itself. | ||
| It's like, hmm, he doesn't want to be this anymore. | ||
| He wants to be another thing like us. | ||
| He wants to be like mommy and mommy. | ||
| You know, whoa! | ||
| Could you imagine if you had to stick with the rest of your life with fucking decisions you made at 10? | ||
| Holy fuck! | ||
| Dude, being a transgender is totally normal in Thailand. | ||
| They accept that there are celebrities that are transgenders or transvestites, whatever you want to call them. | ||
| It's totally normal. | ||
| It's totally accepted. | ||
| I wonder how that happened. | ||
| How crazy is that? | ||
| I wonder how that happened, man. | ||
| Yeah, you know, shit. | ||
| Yeah, someone was, there was an article, I think on the Underground, talking about how ladyboys will fuck dudes up if dudes, you know, like, you know, some guys get, like, real disrespectful with ladyboys, but they don't realize, like, that's still a man. | ||
| That's still a man, and he probably knows how to punch, you know, fuck you up, man. | ||
| Like, the story's about them getting upset. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| Well, you know, if you saw a guy at jiu-jitsu who had the body of a 13-year-old Thai girl, you're like, there's no way you're going to do shit. | ||
| I'm going to fuck you up. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't care if you were born with balls, you know? | |
| They're so frail and tiny. | ||
| They are frail and tiny, but the reality is if you're like a girl and you weigh like 130 plus pounds... | ||
| There's a few girls that are around that weight that can punch you in the face and knock you unconscious. | ||
| Legit. | ||
| Like my friend Tommy Jr. Did you ever meet my friend Tommy Jr.? | ||
| You met my friend Tommy Jr. from Connecticut? | ||
| I believe you met him at UFCs before. | ||
| Anyway, his girl has a ridiculously powerful punch. | ||
| Redhead? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Okay, I remember that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Ridiculous. | |
| She sets up one of those things like at the bar when you put it in a quarter and you fucking smash that punching bag. | ||
| Dude, she hits harder than guys on that thing. | ||
| It's ridiculous. | ||
| If she sucker punched you, you're fucked. | ||
| So if that was a Thai chick, if it was a Thai chick that could punch like she punches and you thought you were an asshole... | ||
| You're just going to fucking push her around. | ||
| You're drunk. | ||
| And she just uncorks one on your chin. | ||
| And your legs get out. | ||
| And then she fucking shin kicks you in the face. | ||
| Yeah, that's all real, man. | ||
| A 135-pound athletic girl. | ||
| It's very possible for that chick to kick your ass if you don't know what you're doing. | ||
| That's what I say. | ||
| When I look at a girl like Tommy Jr.'s girlfriend, I say, okay, if she wanted to, if you didn't know what you were doing, and she uncorked a couple on you before you knew it was happening, you could get knocked the fuck out. | ||
| For real. | ||
| So that's like the size that you have to be, I think, to be able to survive against the average-sized human. | ||
| At least 135-pound woman. | ||
| So if you're 110 pounds, you need to get on roids. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Damn, Cabin in the Woods on Rotten Tomatoes, 92%. | ||
| Oh, shit! | ||
| I think Eddie might be wrong. | ||
| Eddie, bravo. | ||
| 92% on Rotten Tomatoes. | ||
| Why do I have a feeling this is going to be my favorite movie of all time? | ||
| Because it sounds awesome. | ||
| And the guy who wrote Cabin in the Woods is also the director of the new Avengers movie. | ||
| Yo, I might go see Cabin in the Woods tonight. | ||
| I know. | ||
| Well, I didn't say the directing was bad. | ||
| Well, you said the movie was terrible. | ||
| Yeah, whoever made that story. | ||
| Oh, he wrote it? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Damn, I'm sorry, dude. | ||
| I should have lied. | ||
| Well, listen, man. | ||
| You have very specific tastes. | ||
| Yeah, you have a different taste. | ||
| You have super specific tastes when it comes to movies. | ||
| When was the last werewolf movie you enjoyed? | ||
| I'm not down with the way I am. | ||
| Did you ever see the movie Kick-Ass? | ||
| That Lichen Underworld thing. | ||
| It's cool to watch because of the colors and stuff. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Did you see the movie Kick-Ass? | ||
| Kick-Ass is awesome. | ||
| I love Kick-Ass. | ||
| That was a great fucking movie. | ||
| That was a great fucking movie. | ||
| I can't wait for the sequel. | ||
| When is that coming out? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't know. | |
| Yeah, that was a great fucking movie. | ||
| Kick-Ass is great. | ||
| I love it. | ||
| Did you see American Werewolf in London? | ||
| Yes, but I think I was eight. | ||
| The werewolf was at this convention the other day in Burbank. | ||
| The guy who played the werewolf. | ||
| It was a horror convention. | ||
| What is his name? | ||
| I don't remember. | ||
| Yeah, that dude was in a couple of movies. | ||
| He was like a star for a little bit. | ||
| There's dudes like that that become like a star for a little bit. | ||
| We should respect to that guy because that's I don't remember his fucking name John Lewis David Naughton. | ||
| That's his name. | ||
| God damn, that thing was awesome. | ||
| Look at that shit, dude. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's cool. | ||
| Oh, that thing's amazing. | ||
| What the fuck? | ||
| What a crazy monster that werewolf was. | ||
| Those are just fun movies for me, man. | ||
| Some people, they like movies that are sad and realistic where the good guy dies. | ||
| Me, I'm not really into that. | ||
| I just want to be entertained. | ||
| I just want you to take me on a trip. | ||
| It could be... | ||
| No one has to die. | ||
| I'm not saying someone has to die. | ||
| I'm just saying, make it unpredictable. | ||
| Right. | ||
| What's your all-time favorite movie? | ||
| Do you have an all-time favorite? | ||
| Gleaming the Cube, bro. | ||
| I mean, there's all the classics, you know. | ||
| Aliens, part two, was one of my all-time favorites. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That was a good movie. | |
| I liked it a lot. | ||
| Did you like the first one? | ||
| You know, Scarface, of course, and Goodfellas, and Casino, and Godfather. | ||
| So you're a mafia movie guy. | ||
| Did you like the first Aliens? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| I liked the second Alien better, but the first Alien was also really good. | ||
| Alien 3 sucked. | ||
| I didn't like it. | ||
| I didn't mind it. | ||
| I didn't mind Alien 3. One of the funniest, most misunderstood movies ever for me, and most people thought it was just total shit, was Freddy Got Fingered. | ||
| That's still one of my all-time favorites. | ||
| I love that movie, man. | ||
| What's your favorite Star Wars? | ||
| Did you like starting off anger? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Isn't it great? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| What's your favorite Star Wars movie? | ||
| The labor scene when he gave birth to that baby. | ||
| That's the greatest scene ever. | ||
| What was your question? | ||
| I'm sorry. | ||
| What's your favorite Star Wars? | ||
| Did you like Star Wars? | ||
| I wasn't really into Star Wars. | ||
| A little bit. | ||
| A little bit. | ||
| You know, like Empire Strikes Back. | ||
| That was a classic. | ||
| And Yoda. | ||
| He was cool. | ||
| I'm not like... | ||
| Episode 1 and all that new shit. | ||
| They lost me. | ||
| They lost me with that. | ||
| I think it's funny, though, but I know... | ||
| I think it has to do with, like, your past. | ||
| Like, you're not into, like, anybody lying to you. | ||
| You don't want any bullshit, man. | ||
| You don't want anybody... | ||
| I want any holes in the story. | ||
| You don't want anybody, like, about to go over the cliff and digs the hammer into the side of the hill and saves yourself dangling over the fucking side of the cliff holding onto a hammer. | ||
| I love Will Ferrell movies, like fucking Step Brothers. | ||
| I could watch that over and over and over. | ||
| Step Brothers was one of the greatest movies ever. | ||
| Talladega Nights, Tropic Thunder, that's probably top three greatest comedies ever, if not the funniest one. | ||
| Tropic Thunder, probably the funniest fucking movie ever. | ||
| All the way through, every character played an asshole in the movie, and they were all brilliant. | ||
| And I like that shit. | ||
| Obviously, I'm just not into superhero stuff. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm just not into it, man. | |
| But I probably will be for my son. | ||
| I probably will be. | ||
| I'll probably get into it and be forced to like Lords of the Rings and shit like that. | ||
| You know, like Lords of the Rings? | ||
| Dude, that shit puts me to sleep. | ||
| I don't know what fucking dragons are fighting. | ||
| And then the ghosts end up winning. | ||
| The ghosts end up fighting. | ||
| There's just like constant... | ||
| The movie is with the constant Braveheart clashing. | ||
| Like... | ||
|
unidentified
|
They're just like fucking just swinging at each other. | |
| Braveheart is the only one I could watch like that. | ||
| All the other ones forget about it. | ||
| Who fights like that? | ||
| I'd be running the other fucking way. | ||
| I'm just gonna come in with fucking swords. | ||
| Fuck that shit. | ||
| I'm gonna grab my kids and get the fuck out. | ||
| I think that's how they rocked it occasionally. | ||
| I don't think they did it that often though. | ||
| I don't think they did that crazy. | ||
| I think a lot of it was sneaking up on bitches. | ||
| I think that's what a lot of war was back then. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| You had to convince them there was a Jesus, man. | ||
| You had to convince them you're doing this for Jesus, you're doing this for God. | ||
| Like the conquistadors and all that shit. | ||
| Without Jesus, they wouldn't have been able to pull that shit off. | ||
| Really? | ||
| But they were just raping and getting Indian pussy all over the world? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| How do you get Indian pussy all over the world? | ||
| You have to bring it with you. | ||
| They thought they were doing God's mission, man. | ||
| They thought they were saving him. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Maybe. | |
| Maybe they were having a good fucking time, too. | ||
| That's a possibility, too. | ||
| Raping and pillaging with swords. | ||
| This Game of Thrones movie, or this show, is so goddamn addicted, and that's what it's all about. | ||
| Everybody just fucking people up. | ||
| Is it confusing? | ||
| I heard it's like, there's a lot of characters, and you just kind of... | ||
| There's some points where you're just like, alright, there's just too much people. | ||
| I can't say because I'm only in five episodes. | ||
| But as of five episodes, there's a couple moments where you've got to go, okay, that guy's the Mad King. | ||
| Okay, and he did that. | ||
| Is this kind of like the Tudors also where it's kind of geared towards women in some weird romantic sex way? | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| No, no, no. | ||
| I don't think so. | ||
| It's fucking cruel. | ||
| It's a cruel show. | ||
| And a lot of titties and a lot of fucking and a lot of prostitution. | ||
| A lot of betrayal. | ||
| Good times. | ||
| Some incest. | ||
| It's a crazy fucking show. | ||
| It could not have existed outside of HBO. Incest? | ||
| Oh yeah. | ||
| A hot brother and sister. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| Isn't that illegal? | ||
| Back in the day, it was normal. | ||
| No, it wasn't necessarily normal. | ||
| I don't want to give away any spoilers. | ||
| According to mainstream Egyptology, pharaohs, like all their sisters and all their relatives, were their wives. | ||
| Ew. | ||
| They had hundreds of them. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Ew! | |
| According to mainstream Egyptology, I don't know anything about it. | ||
| Well, I think a lot of times royal families were trying to keep their bloodlines pure, right? | ||
| They were trying to only marry within the broad lines. | ||
| There's some shit to that bloodline, man. | ||
| There's some shit. | ||
| They were fucking their own daughters, dude. | ||
| There's some shit to that bloodline. | ||
| That bloodline was so important. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They're like, fuck it. | |
| You're all staying in. | ||
| We're going to keep this in the family. | ||
| Well, could you imagine the discrepancy, too, between being a king and being a peasant back then? | ||
| And really, there's nothing you did to earn that position. | ||
| You're just a royal family. | ||
| You're the son of the son of this fucking guy who's been ruling this kingdom forever. | ||
| And you just rise through the power. | ||
|
unidentified
|
The bloodline, dude. | |
| Yeah, man. | ||
| It's got to be crazy shit. | ||
| We were, you know, just think about what it is, the difference between the guy who's at the very top and the guy who's at the very bottom. | ||
| And why? | ||
| Because he's got royal blood. | ||
| And you know what's crazy? | ||
| I forget the title, but this woman had the title. | ||
| She was the wife that was in charge of organizing who was going to hang out with the pharaohs. | ||
| She was like the event coordinator, who was also his wife. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Isn't that crazy? | ||
| Ridiculous. | ||
| Ridiculous. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Damn. | |
| Goddamn. | ||
| I think the way that people have always rocked it throughout history is there have been just wild freak fuck festivals. | ||
| People just fuck all over the place. | ||
| Dude, how about... | ||
| I think that's one of the things, this Game of Thrones thing is so accurate. | ||
| I think people just... | ||
| People back in those days, they only lived... | ||
| They're going to get hacked to death by a fucking guy with a sword. | ||
| Yeah, someone's going to get him. | ||
| Someone's going to betray him or something. | ||
| They're trying to get their freak on every step of the way. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Orgies galore. | |
| Fuck yeah. | ||
| Kama Sutra. | ||
| They were wild back then, man. | ||
| It's amazing when you really think about the amount of time that went between then and now. | ||
| Not that much time, if you really stop and think about it. | ||
| Well, ancient religions, the ancient Chinese and the Hindus, they all believed that having sex got you closer to God, and that's how you got close. | ||
| It was almost like meditation. | ||
| That's all they had back then. | ||
| They didn't have TV. That's all they had. | ||
| They thought sex brought you closer to God because they didn't have the internet. | ||
| Yeah, it feels great. | ||
| Of course it feels great. | ||
| That's the big trick, you dummy. | ||
| That's why you make people. | ||
| The universe is created. | ||
|
unidentified
|
All your spirituality just went down the tubes. | |
| You're like, fuck that. | ||
| I like how you turn it on and off. | ||
| You're like, if it's funny, fuck it. | ||
| You're going to crush spirituality. | ||
| I can't help myself. | ||
|
unidentified
|
If it's funny, you just jump on it. | |
| But you're a spiritual person, right? | ||
| Yeah, well, I'm certainly a nice person, for sure. | ||
| Would you consider yourself a spiritual person? | ||
| I don't like that word, because I feel like it has too many weirdo connotations. | ||
| I would definitely say I try to be a very positive person. | ||
| I try to be really nice to people. | ||
| I go out of my way to do that. | ||
| Do you think there's any kind of spirituality involved in that? | ||
| I think there's whatever you would want to call it. | ||
| There's certainly an exchange in energy and an enhancement of each other that I feel like we all have. | ||
| We all have as friends. | ||
| Everyone in this room. | ||
| Brian, for sure. | ||
| I've known Brian for a decade. | ||
| We enhance each other, for sure. | ||
| That's one of the reasons why I enjoy doing a podcast with him. | ||
| I know gay jokes, bro. | ||
| You and I, man, we enhance each other. | ||
| We've always enjoyed having these crazy conversations, even if we don't agree about a lot of shit. | ||
| And we don't agree about a lot of shit. | ||
| But we've always enjoyed it because I favor your opinion over everyone else's and treat it equally as if it was mine. | ||
| Because I know you so well, I know how your mind works. | ||
| So every time you have an opinion on something... | ||
| I accept it as if it's me having that opinion. | ||
| I allow myself to go through the whole process. | ||
| There's not a whole lot of people that you can do that with in life. | ||
| You know, there's not a whole lot of people where you go, yeah, Bob said he didn't do anything, but his fucking fingerprints were everywhere, and the murder weapon was in the street in front of his... | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| There's few dudes where you always know where they're coming from, you know? | ||
| And I think... | ||
| Having people like that in your life is one of the most important things. | ||
| It's more important than what you do for a living. | ||
| The most important thing is you've got to cultivate great friendships. | ||
| Because then once you cultivate great friendships, you each get better at everything else while you're involved. | ||
| In a friendship with someone who's also getting better. | ||
| I think my comedy right now, I've never felt better about it. | ||
| And one of the things that I feel really good about it is that I hear Ari is fucking killing it on the road. | ||
| I hear Ari packed it in Vancouver and fucking crushed it. | ||
| He's headlining all these places that I do. | ||
| He's headlining big places. | ||
| He's doing the comedy works in Denver. | ||
| I hear that. | ||
| It's awesome. | ||
| I take Duncan on the road with me. | ||
| He goes on stage. | ||
| He gets standing ovations, dude. | ||
| When we were in Louisville, Duncan got standing ovations every time. | ||
| Just walking on stage, they're going nuts and cheering. | ||
| That makes me feel better about comedy than anything. | ||
| There's a trick to life, and a big part of it is generosity. | ||
| The big part of it is appreciation for other people's success. | ||
| A big part of it is being around other people that are trying to go for success and enhancing each other along the way. | ||
| Having a group of people that are all doing positive shit and moving forward and doing what they want to do, man, and having it all come together. | ||
| Everybody together doing that together, that's all like a big juicy enhancement. | ||
| Joey Diaz just got number one on iTunes. | ||
| He's the number one comedy CD on iTunes, dude. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Dude, he called me up. | ||
| He goes, Joe Rogan, I just want to thank you very much. | ||
| We're doing this. | ||
| We're fucking knocking them dead. | ||
| This is just the beginning. | ||
| We're laying bitches out. | ||
| He was going crazy. | ||
| He was full on fired up. | ||
| Full on fired up. | ||
| He was on 100% Joey Diaz. | ||
| That's awesome. | ||
| He was so excited. | ||
| Yeah, but how could that have ever happened before he has his podcast? | ||
| His podcast, Beauty and the Beast, people love that fucking podcast. | ||
| Duncan's podcast, he's killing it on that podcast. | ||
| People love Duncan's new podcast. | ||
| Always podcast. | ||
| And all of that shit happens. | ||
| It builds us all up. | ||
| It helps us all. | ||
| You need to start a podcast, dude. | ||
| For sure. | ||
| You need to do a podcast. | ||
| Easy. | ||
| You know what? | ||
| It's just... | ||
| It's easy, dude. | ||
| I don't know, man. | ||
| You got time. | ||
| You should seriously consider it because I think it would blow your fucking seminars through the roof. | ||
| It would be a way where you could instantly talk to people, address questions. | ||
| It's hard, man. | ||
| The baby just came. | ||
| Oh, I hear you, brother. | ||
| I mean, you don't have to do it right away, but start thinking about it, and then when you get to a position where you get just a couple free hours a week, you know, where you think you might be able to devote to that, Slide on in. | ||
| Your thing will be a hit right off the bat. | ||
| Dude, I'm going to do this podcast. | ||
| This 14-year-old kid does his own podcast and he does it all on KISS. Every podcast. | ||
| He got into KISS in 2008. I got into KISS in 1978. And he's a KISS fucking maniac. | ||
| I'm going to do his podcast in a week. | ||
| And I heard one of his podcasts and he's like a little genius. | ||
| He's 14 years old, running a show. | ||
| He's the host. | ||
| He's like a little baby Howard Stern. | ||
| You didn't meet him at a park, did you? | ||
| No, I met him through Twitter. | ||
| Did you have a van? | ||
| No, you haven't. | ||
| That's cool. | ||
| I think about it every now and then, but I don't mind the way my life is right now. | ||
| I hear what you're saying. | ||
| I like my life the way it is. | ||
| And if I added a show, then I'd be forced to talk all the time. | ||
| I like just being a guest every now and then. | ||
| I like it. | ||
| Then everything stays fresh. | ||
| I don't know about trying to keep it together. | ||
| Are you going to be involved, do you think, in a bloody Twitter war tonight with pro 9-11 people? | ||
| I love those guys. | ||
| Those guys are awesome. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That building was on fire! | |
| It's proven! | ||
| Look! | ||
| Look, here's a link! | ||
| It was on fire! | ||
| Those guys are hilarious. | ||
| There's a lot of smart people on that side. | ||
| There's a lot of smart people that don't think that it was an inside job. | ||
| Look, I reserve my right to not form an opinion on that. | ||
| And I just look at all of it and I go, yeah, there's certainly some fuckery afoot. | ||
| That Donald Rumpfeld thing is crazy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's really crazy. | |
| That's not even Tower 7! | ||
| That's not even Tower 7! | ||
| How amazingly coincidental. | ||
| Just if that happened alone, if that happened without the towers, you would be like, wait a minute, what? | ||
| But because the towers went down too, it was almost like there was so much chaos in one day, they got away with that Pentagon. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's perfect. | |
| It's really, if you wanted to steal $2 trillion in money, if they really did steal that much money, I mean, wow. | ||
| Would that not be the greatest jacking in the history of humanity? | ||
| If they really did pull that off, and all of that was just designed... | ||
| To cover up their jacking of the records in the Pentagon. | ||
| And then they said, well, you know what? | ||
| While we're at it, let's just go to war with Iraq and take their shit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Boom! | |
| I mean, if they just decided, like, we got this, dude. | ||
| Everybody's on our side. | ||
| There's American flags everywhere. | ||
| Let's just run with this shit. | ||
| Let's run with it. | ||
| And they just ran with it. | ||
| They're just stormtrooping. | ||
| Crazy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Taking money on CNN. And it's real, man. | |
| This is real. | ||
| This is really happening with real people and real bullets in 2012. Scary shit, man. | ||
| It's amazing. | ||
| Scary. | ||
| How do you trust a government like that? | ||
| How does Obama become that guy? | ||
| He's like only a few years older than me. | ||
| That freaks me out. | ||
| How does a guy who grew up essentially in the same era as me and who grew up around a lot of leftists and a lot of like... | ||
| He grew up around... | ||
| He knew some dude or something. | ||
| I believe he was a professor who was from the Weather Underground, that radical group. | ||
| Obama's perfect. | ||
| Obama's perfect. | ||
| Think about it. | ||
| George W. Bush fucked up so hard. | ||
| The only way they were going to keep the power, the people were about to fucking say, fuck this revolution. | ||
| Let's give them Obama. | ||
| Calm them down. | ||
| That was perfect. | ||
| We'll fucking take all this shit and we'll drop Obama on them. | ||
| Calm them down. | ||
| They're buying another eight years, maybe longer. | ||
| Dude, that was all perfect. | ||
| And look, who did Obama run against? | ||
| A dude who was almost dead and some crazy chick. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It was perfect. | |
| It really is ridiculous. | ||
| Whoever was putting this together, they're probably laughing in the writing rooms. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They're probably fucking busting up. | |
| Whose idea was Sarah Palin? | ||
| That dude probably got like a million dollar bonus from some Illuminati guy. | ||
| Meanwhile, she probably could win. | ||
| If there was a sensible person who was a real powerful Republican and he was the president and he wanted her as a vice president, at this point in time, she might actually be able to get in. | ||
| She's become such a public celebrity. | ||
| And there's enough stupid people out there that don't even see what's going on. | ||
| They're just flowing right with it. | ||
| And if they could just coach her, if she would take some coaching, apparently she's not that good at taking coaching, which is one of the problems with her. | ||
| She became a maverick. | ||
| She's out there on her own, getting crazy, telling the people what she really thinks. | ||
| She became a celebrity. | ||
| Isn't that amazing? | ||
| This is all ridiculous, man. | ||
| This is insane, this beautiful. | ||
| It's a movie. | ||
| It's like, you know, it really supports the theory that we're living inside some sort of a computer-generated reality. | ||
| The more preposterous things happen... | ||
| Preposterous! | ||
| That's ridiculous. | ||
| The more silly things happen in the news like that, the more just ridiculous scenarios play out over and over again, the more you've got to just question... | ||
| Could you imagine if it really does turn out that this whole thing is bullshit? | ||
| And you wake up one day and you and your friends just shot up with some weird electronic drug that takes you on some 40 year journey and then brings you back. | ||
| Because of the dimension. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Brings you back and to you it was only a few minutes of time. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| And that's your whole life. | ||
| Man, anything's possible, man. | ||
| Could you imagine how weird that would be? | ||
| Life is a series of re-expanding and contracting little existences like that that take place a full lifetime inside of ten minutes. | ||
| You're born with only two skills. | ||
| Only two. | ||
| Fucking screaming and the sucking muscles in your mouth are so developed. | ||
| You're born... | ||
| You have no control. | ||
| Your fucking head. | ||
| You don't know what the hell you're doing with your arms. | ||
| Your muscles are nowhere near being developed. | ||
| Your legs are just kind of flopping around. | ||
| But those sucking muscles... | ||
| Fully developed. | ||
| And the vocal cords developed. | ||
| You would think a baby would come out with weak vocal cords and they couldn't scream. | ||
| How the fuck are they screaming so goddamn loud? | ||
| That's some developed shit. | ||
| It's like you come in with two powers, right? | ||
| You come in, okay, you're going to get sucking. | ||
| Everyone comes in with just sucking and screaming. | ||
| That's it. | ||
| Can't feed yourself at all. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Some dudes, I'm going to go in no fucking sucking, no screaming. | |
| I'm going to figure this shot out. | ||
| Dude, it's dangerous, bro. | ||
| It's dangerous. | ||
| Yeah, does any baby ever come out and go, sup? | ||
| Sup? | ||
| I'm here. | ||
| Sup? | ||
| How's everybody doing? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I mean, there's a, I don't know if you call it a movement or what it is, but there's people out there that believe in indigo children. | ||
| Do you know what this is? | ||
| Have you looked into it? | ||
| No. | ||
| Supposedly, this is like some crazy ass new age shit. | ||
| That there are children that are born nowadays that are super smart, like right when they're born. | ||
| They're super enlightened. | ||
| This is probably all bullshit, but if you go on YouTube, type in indigo children, and they're like super brilliant, enlightened kids. | ||
| They're called autistic. | ||
| I don't know, maybe. | ||
| Maybe it's a form of autism. | ||
| This is certainly a little bit of that, right? | ||
| Maybe. | ||
| Maybe. | ||
| I don't know, but... | ||
| I've never met a genius autistic kid. | ||
| Isn't it crazy? | ||
| I think that they all are. | ||
| If you look at any of these movies, definitely Wapner, definitely Wapner, but they always have this memory where they can always remember a thousand things. | ||
| They're almost like on a... | ||
| What if they're a step past us and they're just not into all the gossip and bullshit of normal day lives, but yet they're fucking figuring out Right. | ||
| Well, you know, at a certain point in time, the question becomes, is all of our emotions and all of our caveman ideas and genetics, is all that really going to be effective? | ||
| Do we need all these crazy emotions? | ||
| Do we need all this weird way of interacting with each other? | ||
| After a while, can that become something else? | ||
| And it could become something that's maybe more effective mathematically? | ||
| And something that's maybe just not as inclined to be swayed by emotion, you know, that it's just like a little detached, a little detached from the human experience, but much more elevated in a certain way. | ||
| I mean, we look at it like it's a disease, but on some of them, maybe it's not, you know? | ||
| Look at the language. | ||
| Look how we're texting back and forth, how we're twittering. | ||
| We're not even using real words anymore. | ||
| This in 20 years is autism. | ||
| Yeah, that's a really good point. | ||
| Because if you think about how much is lost in a text message, man, the only people that I like texting with are people that I'm already close with. | ||
| Because then, you know, I could, you know, if you text me, where are you at? | ||
| I'm inside your mother's pussy. | ||
| You know, you could... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| We laugh at each other, you know what I mean? | ||
| You could joke around. | ||
| We're all going to be autistic holograms in the future. | ||
| That is really possible. | ||
| We're going to be like Tupac at Coachella. | ||
| Tupac looks like he's been doing MMA. Maybe he's been training with Pablo Popovich. | ||
| Maybe he's been doing Pablo Popovich's strength and conditioning routine because he looked yoked. | ||
| Yeah, in 1980. His clothes were all just cheesy old 90s clothes or 80s clothes. | ||
| How did they do that? | ||
| Did they use actual footage of him and just make holograms of that? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I think they just used $10 million. | ||
| How long has Coachella been around for? | ||
| Wow, that's where... | ||
| 15 years? | ||
| Was Tupac alive when Coachella was around? | ||
| Did he ever play at Coachella? | ||
| No, I'm not sure. | ||
| Well, this Tupac was saying, What's up, Coachella? | ||
| So was that an actor? | ||
| Yeah, I think the whole thing was an actor. | ||
| The whole thing was like a fake Tupac? | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| That was CGI and that was... | ||
| Someone else's voice. | ||
| Ew! | ||
| There's something creepy about it. | ||
| His voice is easy to copy. | ||
| He's got a very distinctive voice. | ||
| The band Gorillaz, I don't know if you know anything about Gorillaz, how that's not a real band. | ||
| They've actually been doing this for a while using holograms. | ||
| Their latest one, I guess, is... | ||
| I don't know if it's out yet or not, but they were going to be doing the same kind of technology as this, but where they go out into the crowd. | ||
| They have a walkway where fashion models use, where their band members will walk out and... | ||
| In hologram style. | ||
| Soon you could record one concert, bam, you go home. | ||
| They just use holograms. | ||
| What's the coolest thing about this is that it exists and that even though the price tag for it was $10 million... | ||
| But seeing a movie for your first time back in whenever, the 20s or 30s, a silent movie, you used to be like, wow, look at this amazing thing! | ||
| And now you have it on your phone. | ||
| So the cool thing about this technology is that you know it will be coming to us in a cheaper way and form factor somehow. | ||
| And we're all going to be Star Wars-ing around with our Princess Leia's telling us to help somebody. | ||
| Help me, Obi-Wan. | ||
| You're my only hope. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, no shit. | ||
| And that was terrible technology. | ||
| Princess Leia looked like shit. | ||
| That's going to fucking bring porn back big! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Can you imagine that? | ||
| Wolf Blitzer. | ||
| Or ex-girlfriends. | ||
| Wolfram ex-girlfriends. | ||
| Wolf Blitzer. | ||
| Would that be considered cheating? | ||
| No. | ||
| If you had holograms and you just like... | ||
| Well, you can't fuck a hologram, so no, it's not cheating. | ||
| Yeah, but it would be like having old photos of your girlfriend. | ||
| You fuck a hologram, but you use the fleshlight. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Hmm. | |
| Maybe. | ||
| Hmm. | ||
| But the hologram is just a video thing. | ||
| You're not going to be able to touch it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
But you use the fleshlight. | |
| You'd have to hold on to the fleshlight and you could put the hologram right on you like she's lap dancing and you jack the fleshlight. | ||
| You're better off just getting real close to it and looking at it. | ||
| I think it'll work. | ||
|
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|
Or you take an ugly chick, put her inside a hologram, and the hologram moves to her. | |
| She controls it. | ||
| So she has a thin layer of a hologram around that ugly body. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You might be able to hologram your face. | |
| Oh, that's a hologram. | ||
| That's true. | ||
| Good point. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Can you imagine that? | |
| You hologram some fucking beautiful person right on your face. | ||
| Makeup's going to be a hologram in the future. | ||
| Hell yeah. | ||
| That'd be cool. | ||
| Have you seen it without a hologram? | ||
| You could put your whole face on. | ||
| You could put a different face on. | ||
| Imagine going out and you're talking to a girl and you see a little disturbance. | ||
| Oh shit. | ||
| Goddamn hologram. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fuck! | |
| A lot of times you can go fuck a hologram. | ||
| The only thing is your dick, the first half an inch of our lips is transparent. | ||
| You can see through it as your dick goes through it. | ||
| What's going on here? | ||
| What's really in here? | ||
| It's really a dude. | ||
| It's a lot of dudes. | ||
| I have something to tell you. | ||
| That's my butt. | ||
| Pretty cool, like, being able to change clothes, you know, like, I want a suit. | ||
| Yeah, you just walk around naked with a hologram on. | ||
| I mean, what the fuck, man? | ||
| There's a lot of places where that might actually be, like, that might feel nice. | ||
| Dude, big hologram dicks. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Dude, that would be huge, right? | |
| Girls would go to grab it and fall forward. | ||
| Where is it? | ||
| Try to grab it and fall on your face. | ||
| It's a dog. | ||
| That's a fucking interesting idea that we could eventually change the actual visual appearance of things. | ||
| You know, that we could do it. | ||
| Like, have you ever seen those walls? | ||
| There's, like, a certain kind of wallpaper that they have that has, like, lights and, yeah, like, e-paper? | ||
| What is it? | ||
| And it changes? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Like, what is it? | ||
| You turn it on, and, like, what does it do exactly? | ||
| Well, it pretty much is, like, a foldable LCD screen where you'll be able to, like, in the future, I don't know what that one is, but the technology's out where... | ||
| Eventually we'll have walls where that will be a screen. | ||
| And you can turn it onto a texture or a color of a wall. | ||
| You can turn on a TV on the wall. | ||
| You can make windows where we'll be able to Skype in one corner and on the other side have a fireplace. | ||
| Minority Report type shit. | ||
| That's happening, man. | ||
| That's on the way, bro. | ||
| Isn't it weird how we've got fat and ugly mastered? | ||
| Like, you can make someone look fat and ugly, but they can't do good looking. | ||
| What do you mean? | ||
| Fake good looking? | ||
| Like, you know, like Big Mama's House? | ||
| Oh, right, right, right. | ||
| You know, the fat suits? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| What if fat became hot, like, in 20 years? | ||
| It probably would happen. | ||
| And dudes are getting fat suits and shit? | ||
| It used to be. | ||
| It used to be for girls. | ||
| It used to be a sign of her being from wealth. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Because she could fatten her ass up while everybody else was starving to death. | ||
| Plus she was warmer. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Imagine back then. | ||
| Back then all you needed was like turkey and fucking all this food on the table and people thought you were rich as fuck. | ||
| Like, oh my God. | ||
| Look at all the food. | ||
| This bitch just keeps eating. | ||
| You just keep eating food. | ||
| Like, if you're a fat fuck, that was awesome. | ||
| It's like, you can just sit around and eat. | ||
| There was dark times in this species history where people were just scrounging and scratching, and it got to the point where fat, obese people were sexy because they were desirable. | ||
| It's so rare. | ||
| So rare someone just can lay around and do nothing and eat. | ||
| I can see that coming back, for sure. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| Dark times come, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I wonder when grabbing chicks by the head and dragging them through the fucking dirt became illegal. | ||
| Well, it might be on the way back. | ||
| You look at this Chris Brown thing. | ||
| Chris Brown is a huge star. | ||
| Beat up Rihanna. | ||
| Still a huge star. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Again? | |
| Bigger star than ever. | ||
| No, he didn't beat her up again. | ||
| But you know what I mean? | ||
| Never really... | ||
| I mean, people... | ||
| He didn't really hurt his career. | ||
| People talk shit about him, but it actually probably made him bigger. | ||
| And now they're friends again. | ||
| So it's probably getting more acceptable. | ||
| I don't think you should do it, by the way. | ||
| There's some people that accuse me of being a misogynist, Brian, online. | ||
| And I'm so sad. | ||
| You've always been, ever since I've known you, people think that. | ||
| It's so sad. | ||
| Listen, but if you're a dumb cunt, yeah, I'm a misogynist. | ||
| Against dumb cunts only. | ||
| But I'm not against, like, regular women. | ||
| I like regular women. | ||
| Regular women are some of the nicest people I know. | ||
| You know, they're not burdened by a lot of the testosterone issues that men have. | ||
| I don't have any problem with most women. | ||
| But dumb dudes, it's the same. | ||
| If you don't like dumb dudes and you start shitting on dumb dudes, nobody ever says, you fucking hate dudes. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| You hate men. | ||
| But if you have any scenario where a chick says something stupid, even if you generalize and say a chick shouldn't be president, I don't think men should give birth either. | ||
| Don't get me wrong. | ||
| I mean, it's not an even exchange here. | ||
| But I certainly am not a misogynist by any stretch of the imagination or anything. | ||
| Just don't filter yourself on sexist. | ||
| If somebody's being a fucking idiot, you'll say it's a guy or a girl, and I think that's what it is a lot of times. | ||
| I try to be as nice as possible about it, especially now, especially when you're talking to a chick. | ||
| A lot of times chicks are a little bit more sensitive to criticism or the potential possibility that you're a mean asshole and you're going to say something mean to her. | ||
| I try to be a lot nicer about it. | ||
| Are you going to go pee? | ||
| I'm going to go pee, bro. | ||
| Alright, good luck with that. | ||
| No, we're just going to talk about me being a misogynist and a homophobe or something. | ||
| Neither of those things. | ||
| I'm no perfect person, but when I tell you my real, true, honest feelings and intentions and how I express them on this podcast... | ||
| You're definitely not a homophobe at all. | ||
| That's silly. | ||
| I'm neither that nor am I a sexist person. | ||
| I try to be real even. | ||
| There's a lot of things I don't like. | ||
| Don't get me wrong. | ||
| I'm not like a person without angst or a person that doesn't get upset at things. | ||
| I'm certainly not enlightened in any shape or form. | ||
| But I'm pretty even about what I like and don't like. | ||
| If you're nice, I like you. | ||
| I'm a fucking easygoing guy. | ||
| There's a lot of comedians that I don't even... | ||
| I can't even watch their act. | ||
| They're terrible. | ||
| But if they're nice to me, I'm nice to them. | ||
| I'm nice to everybody that's nice to me. | ||
| That's how I treat the world. | ||
| And if you're a woman and you're nice to me, we're friends. | ||
| Period. | ||
| It's that simple. | ||
| But for whatever reason, if there's ever any conflict of you with a woman... | ||
| With a woman? | ||
| With a woman. | ||
| With women and women, folks. | ||
| If there's any conflict ever and it's documented online, you automatically point to that one moment in time. | ||
| Like a woman heckler or a feminist or any of that shit. | ||
| The feminist video is a perfect example of me trying to not get into a thing with her. | ||
| I didn't want to... | ||
| I was trying to be nice. | ||
| I try to be nice always, until you can't be nice anymore, and then you're like, get out of here, bitch. | ||
| It's not my preference. | ||
| My preference is certainly to be nice. | ||
| And you too, man. | ||
| One of the nicest guys I know. | ||
| One of the cool things about Jiu-Jitsu is that the dudes that do it, generally speaking, are so much more relaxed, ego-wise. | ||
| You meet so many nice guys. | ||
| So many people, when they have their ego in check, when they do jiu-jitsu, it's fucking hard. | ||
| It's not easy to go out there and put your ass on the line. | ||
| You work all day and you're tired. | ||
| Then you go to a fucking jiu-jitsu class, especially when you're a beginner. | ||
| That shit is hard as fuck. | ||
| You get your ass kicked. | ||
| It's terrible. | ||
| But if you can get through that gauntlet, if you can get through that, become a blue belt, become a purple belt, there's certain qualities that those guys have about them. | ||
| They're just more relaxed. | ||
| Like Mike Maxwell, the guy who does my poster. | ||
| Do you see my poster that I did for the Chicago show? | ||
| No. | ||
| Dude, this guy's so talented. | ||
| And he just did another one for me for the Atlanta show. | ||
| His website's MikeMaxwellArt.com. | ||
| He's a blue belt. | ||
| And he trains with Noguera down in San Diego. | ||
| He's good with graphics. | ||
| Yeah, great with graphics. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Great. | |
| Brilliant. | ||
| Brilliant artist. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Designs t-shirts and shit. | |
| But he's got that same sort of personality about him. | ||
| He's a great guy. | ||
| He's easy going because the dude trains. | ||
| He trains. | ||
| He gets... | ||
| He doesn't have any weird insecurity issues like a lot of people have. | ||
| There's a lot of dudes out there, I think, in not having a martial art. | ||
| Obviously, I'm extremely biased when I voice this opinion. | ||
| It's not for everybody. | ||
| Obviously, I don't think it's for Brian. | ||
| Everybody's personality is different. | ||
| Brian has no desire to do any of that stuff. | ||
| But for a lot of people, they do. | ||
| But you're not insecure about getting in a situation where you get into a fight with guys. | ||
| You'll just get out of there. | ||
| There's a lot of guys who when their manhood is threatened, they want to puff up their chest and they can get in trouble and it's a scary moment for them. | ||
| I'm an extreme opposite of that. | ||
| You are. | ||
| So I don't say it's for everybody. | ||
| We all have our own paths in life. | ||
| But for a lot of people, it can fucking help tremendously. | ||
| It's a missing part of our lives. | ||
| Our whole body, the system, the way the mind operates is all essentially set up for conflict. | ||
| We're set up for physical activity, for conflict. | ||
| We're set up for figuring out who's the alpha of the chimpanzee, the human thing, whatever the fuck we are. | ||
| Every animal has alpha, every primate rather, has like that alpha structure. | ||
| And that's what we have too. | ||
| We have this constant competition. | ||
| But it doesn't happen. | ||
| Instead, it manifests itself as business, which is weird and buttoned down with strange clothes and weird rules and no swears. | ||
| There's a lot of restrictions. | ||
| There's a lot of suppressing the true instincts of the animal, the human organism. | ||
| And Jiu-Jitsu allows you to express the true instincts of the animal organism in a safe way that actually you benefit from and you develop character from. | ||
| You know, and there's a real benefit to that, that obviously you experience, obviously I experience, and you give out when you're teaching Jiu-Jitsu. | ||
| What you're doing with 10th Planet Jiu-Jitsu, with the website, with mastering the system so you can watch different techniques and learn from them online, what you're doing is you're spreading this incredible tool to become a better human being. | ||
| You're spreading this incredible tool to help you master your own personal space a little bit better. | ||
| Look at that, Eddie Bravo. | ||
| Well, thank you very much, Joe. | ||
| Educating bitches. | ||
| Thank you. | ||
| I appreciate that. | ||
| You were saying that it's terrible and it's awful in the beginning. | ||
| You don't mean that. | ||
| Let me clarify that. | ||
| He doesn't mean it's terrible like you have just a terrible time. | ||
| No, no, it's fine. | ||
| He means terrible like if you started playing a new video game for the first time and you're going one-on-one against people, they would be killing you and it's terrible. | ||
| You're losing all the time, but no one's really getting hurt. | ||
| You're not going to get hurt in jujitsu. | ||
| It's not terrible or you're getting hurt. | ||
| You might get hurt like... | ||
| At the same rate as you would play in basketball three times a week. | ||
| You're going to fuck your shoulder up. | ||
| You might fuck your knee up. | ||
| Twist an ankle. | ||
| It's the same thing. | ||
| I've been doing jujitsu 18 years. | ||
| I never needed surgery. | ||
| That's pretty amazing. | ||
| I know a lot of guys like that. | ||
| Eventually, you can tweak your knee. | ||
| You might tear an ACL. You might need some surgery. | ||
| But it's actually super safe. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| When I say terrible, what I really mean is like you're not going to win. | ||
| That's all it is. | ||
| It's really fun to learn, though. | ||
| And before you even spar, you're going to go through drills where you're shown the technique and you execute it on someone who is not resisting. | ||
| And by learning it that way, you know, you do and put in the repetitions, you eventually absolutely can develop those techniques. | ||
| The beautiful thing about the techniques of jiu-jitsu is most of them don't even require any real unusual physical attributes. | ||
| You don't have to be unusually strong. | ||
| You just have to have leverage and position and a lot of people could apply. | ||
| A lot of people out there don't even work out. | ||
| If you taught them a rear naked choke and then you let them put it on you, they could put you to sleep. | ||
| People don't even work out. | ||
| They don't even train. | ||
| The techniques are really that effective. | ||
| So you'll get better. | ||
| It's 100% you'll get better. | ||
| You just have to put in the numbers. | ||
| And that's one of the things that I really always appreciated about the way you talk about jiu-jitsu is that you are always really humble in that regard. | ||
| And you always make sure that you let people know that there's nothing unusual about you. | ||
| You're not a great athlete. | ||
| This is all just thinking and putting in the numbers and doing the proper technique. | ||
| And anyone can do it. | ||
| Children do it. | ||
| Yeah, children do it. | ||
| Old ladies do it. | ||
| It's never too late to do it. | ||
| It doesn't matter if you're 50 or 60, 42. If you want to learn how to subdue someone and put them to sleep scientifically in a very non-violent way, you're doing it with a bunch of nerds. | ||
| Jiu-jitsu itself is a douchebag filter. | ||
| We've talked about that before. | ||
| Douchebags can't handle getting tapped, can't handle losing a game of death. | ||
| Even though no one gets hurt, their ego gets hurt. | ||
| So it automatically keeps douchebags out. | ||
| That's a few sneak in. | ||
| Yeah, every now and then they do. | ||
| But every time I'm on the podcast, we talk about this. | ||
| I know I'm beating everyone over the head with this, but there's jujitsu everywhere. | ||
| Practically every city has a jujitsu school. | ||
| Find a jujitsu school, whether it's no gi or gi. | ||
| Get into it, because within a year, and time flies, within a year, sometimes even six months, depending on how fast you pick it up, but at the most, a year, you will be able to take an untrained man, a dude who doesn't do jujitsu, obviously, and most people don't, If anything goes wrong at the movie theater with your family, with your kids, with your girlfriend, someone steps up, you will have the confidence to put that guy to sleep and just extinguish the problem. | ||
| And it gives you so much confidence in not just those type situations, but in everyday situations, in business, in meetings. | ||
| It just gives you so much confidence knowing if anything goes down, you're safe. | ||
| Dude, I wonder if they're ever going to be able to come out with a jujitsu dummy that is a robot that works on a computer and knows how to execute moves. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Like if you, yeah, because if you see like these, I don't know if you'd want to roll with it because it might fucking kill you. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Because maybe if they could get it to be like super sensitive, you know, maybe, man, I don't know, man. | ||
| The way they're doing it now, the robots they have now, they can push them while they're running and they lean over and then rebalance themselves and come back up. | ||
| They're getting super, super advanced. | ||
| And I think it's the human body, like the anatomy, they already understand it completely. | ||
| They know exactly where the bones go. | ||
| They know if they created some sort of an artificial structure that mimicked bone mass and they figured out a way to power it and move it around. | ||
| And then figure out a way to make it ultra-sensitive to compression and how much it's squeezing and what position it's in. | ||
| And then make it work like a jiu-jitsu fucking fire. | ||
| Have a dope guy in your garage. | ||
| But it couldn't finish you. | ||
| It's just you had really good defense. | ||
| So you worked on your offense. | ||
| He's constantly escaping your shit. | ||
| You want him to attack a little bit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Can you imagine that? | |
| Scary! | ||
| You have to calibrate your neck. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You know what I mean? | |
| You have to calibrate your neck to make sure it doesn't squeeze beyond this point. | ||
| Ooh, that's scary. | ||
| Two people a year are going to die. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You know that? | |
| Two a year at least. | ||
| The tapping malfunction. | ||
| But you look, cigarettes kill a lot of people and they're still smoking cigarettes. | ||
|
unidentified
|
There'll be people fighting for it. | |
| Can you imagine? | ||
| Yeah, if they're responsible guys, they weren't trained. | ||
| That would be the argument. | ||
| We would say, listen, man, cigarettes kill 400,000 people every year. | ||
| A few dudes got jacked by their jiu-jitsu dummy. | ||
| All right, I'm not getting jacked by mine. | ||
| And you could buy one if you're really a lokester. | ||
| You could buy a black belt one. | ||
| And it's talking shit as you take it out of the box. | ||
| Like, really, bitch? | ||
| You think you're ready for this? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really, bitch? | |
| Can you imagine? | ||
| Well, you could get a white belt one and just fucking strangle it. | ||
| Or you can get, like, different kind of athletes, like a 190-pound football player, like one of those ridiculously powerful and explosive defensive end dudes. | ||
| How big would a defensive end be? | ||
| 285 pounds. | ||
| How about that? | ||
| How about a 285 pound one? | ||
| And you only attack it. | ||
| It only does defense. | ||
| You just gotta attack that fucking thing. | ||
| It's constantly trying to peel you off of it. | ||
| But it gets tired like a 280 pound man too. | ||
| Maybe it only has like a certain... | ||
| They calculate its anaerobic capacity. | ||
| Like if its muscles are like Bob Sapp style big, you just gotta figure out how to ride it. | ||
| But it won't ever spike you on your head like Bob Sapp would. | ||
| Nice. | ||
| It's possible, right? | ||
| I think maybe by 2023. I wonder if anybody ever bought a gay reel doll to use it as a jiu-jitsu dummy. | ||
| They'd be like, yeah, I'm just choking. | ||
| It's very realistic. | ||
| I don't like, you know, I mean, when I do choke it, I fuck it. | ||
| But that's, listen, this is the survival of the fittest. | ||
| Have they made massive advancements with the RealDoll? | ||
| Because Howard Stern used to push that 20 years ago. | ||
| The RealDoll must be amazing, or did they plateau? | ||
| That's a good question. | ||
| The biggest problem is that they are definitely better now. | ||
| There's actually companies that make RealDoll knockoff. | ||
| They're the same technology as RealDoll, but they do better. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Every year? | |
| Do they keep getting better? | ||
| Are there real doll conventions? | ||
| We had a guy on one of our shows, Naughty showed a Christmas roast video and they had a couple of real dolls there and they were awesome looking. | ||
| But then the vagina, which felt like a fleshlight ripoff. | ||
| Like, it wasn't as good. | ||
| It's like you're reviewing an iPhone right now, like the latest iPhone. | ||
| So for fucking, I don't think it's there. | ||
| Like, I really do think, like, the flashlight's one of the best feeling, because they're patented rubber and stuff like that. | ||
| You put a fucking flashlight inside one. | ||
| Like, you've got to put one in there, right? | ||
| So you don't have to clean the whole thing. | ||
| Yo, they have tranny ones. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| Tranny what? | ||
| They have tranny real dolls. | ||
| They have a real doll that's a girl with a dick. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It looks like her bush is shaped in the Tap Out logo. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| That's hilarious. | ||
| Are people watching this? | ||
| No, they can't see it. | ||
| Are you sure that's real? | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's not fake? | |
| No, go to realdoll.com and look at SheMail001. | ||
| Throw that up on there. | ||
| How much is that? | ||
| Oh, we can't put it on Ustream. | ||
| Jesus Christ, what am I talking about? | ||
| Listen, don't listen to me. | ||
| This is completely illegal. | ||
| Did you get shut down? | ||
| Ustream shut you down? | ||
| Yeah, well, here's the thing. | ||
| It's cool that you talked about this. | ||
| Ustream is a business. | ||
| They have advertisers, and while they've been nice enough to take the advertising off our shows and stuff like that, They do have to kind of have this kind of policy, you know. | ||
| Yeah, about content. | ||
| Yeah, one of the policies is, believe it or not, marijuana use, any kind of drug use. | ||
| While it might be legal in California, showing us to take bongs and stuff like that. | ||
| So is it from the Ice House Chronicles? | ||
| It's from a couple of things. | ||
| Ice House Chronicles. | ||
| There was a naughty show that I just put up today where there was a quick nudity where the girl took off her clothes and I grabbed the camera right at the last second and I think there was a little bit of nudity in that show. | ||
| But still, I pulled the video immediately when that happened so no one else could see it. | ||
| But I still think there's a lot of people that watch this that marijuana would bug Kodak or Ford if they were a sponsor. | ||
| They're not going to be like, why are you Why are we sponsoring, like, fucking bong hits and stuff? | ||
| Eddie Brown would just say the government planned 9-11. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That would be okay. | ||
| It's fishy. | ||
| So, I mean, it's totally understandable, so I just got to remember that for future use. | ||
| But luckily, you know, Brad is a good buddy of ours, so he hooked me back up. | ||
| Did he tell you to delete those or anything? | ||
| No, I just pulled them. | ||
| I already had them pulled. | ||
| I think it was just automatic. | ||
| So people want to watch those on Vimeo? | ||
| Yeah, Vimeo. | ||
| Just go to deathsquad.tv. | ||
| Deathsquad.tv on Vimeo. | ||
| Yeah, that's a tricky situation. | ||
| Yeah, I can see that. | ||
| There's a lot of parts of this country where they have archaic marijuana laws. | ||
| Like, we can sit there and do shots on camera and there's no problem at all. | ||
| Right. | ||
| We might have to limit it to a drinking room. | ||
| Vimeo has no rules? | ||
| You can put any music you want on? | ||
| No, they have rules. | ||
| It's just they're a little bit more lenient because you're paying for it and there's no advertising involved. | ||
| Vimeo is more of a paid service where you can have a director and you can have a short movie that has nudity in it and most likely you're going to be fine because it's kind of artsy. | ||
| What about music? | ||
| No, I wouldn't say you could use anyone's music, but the laws on music are really fucking weird anyways. | ||
| They tell you do not use any music, but if you're talking over music and it's in a background, does that count? | ||
| Who knows? | ||
| A lot of gray areas for that. | ||
| I'm going to Giorgio Tsoukalos' site to look at his new clothes. | ||
| Oh, dude. | ||
| He's got the greatest shirt ever. | ||
| Where is he? | ||
| He's got a purple shirt that has his face in white, really big, with his hair. | ||
| You know, his hair's bigger than ever. | ||
| And it says Tsoukalicious. | ||
| Oh, my goodness. | ||
| No, he doesn't. | ||
| Giant. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Purple shirt. | |
| Oh, my God. | ||
| I'm looking at it. | ||
| It's the greatest shirt ever. | ||
| I would wear that on the podcast, Giorgio. | ||
| You gotta get me one of these, you silly bitch. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Tsoukalicious. | ||
| Hey, he's running with it, man. | ||
| He's running with that whole UFO thing, dude. | ||
| He's really funny on 4chan. | ||
| Have you ever seen him? | ||
| He goes on 4chan? | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| Oh, the memes. | ||
| Did 4chan get someone killed? | ||
| Probably. | ||
| Is that true? | ||
| I guess. | ||
| Hell. | ||
| You didn't hear about this? | ||
| No, I didn't. | ||
| Some fire-related thing? | ||
| Someone said that it was on, but it could be totally a troll. | ||
| Probably is. | ||
| Who knows? | ||
| But I wouldn't... | ||
| I could believe that. | ||
| I mean, 4chan's just a collection of people. | ||
| It's a question. | ||
| Did 4chan get someone killed is the question. | ||
| I love 4chan and Anonymous. | ||
| Yeah, I do too. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Kisses. | |
| I don't know. | ||
| I'm reading this off some fucking wonky website. | ||
| It could be totally horseshit. | ||
| They keep busting those dudes, though. | ||
| It just said another 4chan user gets busted by the FBI. Oh, that was a while ago, actually. | ||
| What do those guys do, exactly? | ||
| 4chan guys? | ||
| Yeah, everyone's terrified of anyone like that. | ||
| Anonymous, 4chan, anybody's on the internet who just fucked your shit up, kid. | ||
| I don't know what the 4chan guys are. | ||
| 4chan's a little different. | ||
| That's just a message. | ||
| It's a crazy forum, right? | ||
| It's like the most brutal forum on the whole internet. | ||
| It's just like a photo board. | ||
| It's just fun photos and a lot of creepy sex shit. | ||
| But a lot of the internet memes originate there, right? | ||
| The lolcats, didn't they originate there? | ||
| I'm not 100% sure, but yeah. | ||
| That's the theory, right? | ||
| The memes are pictures with the text on it. | ||
| Oh, dude, there's one on my message board. | ||
| There's a picture of a dude all fucked up, and he's all bleeding, and on top it says, at first I thought it was a great idea to throw trash into the dolphin pool, but I didn't know Matt Horowitz was standing right behind me. | ||
| He's all fucking jacked. | ||
| That's funny. | ||
| That's hilarious. | ||
| Those are great, man. | ||
| Internet, like, random internet comedy that comes out of some of those things. | ||
| Some are so fun, man. | ||
| They're so fun. | ||
| Some really hilarious things have been created. | ||
| The Suculose ones, I'm not saying it's aliens, but it was aliens. | ||
| There's, like, so many of them. | ||
| With him and his fucking hair all crazy and the meme is an alien meme. | ||
| Some of those are so funny, dude. | ||
| There's some funny fucking people out there that are trapped in regular jobs. | ||
| Yep. | ||
| I'm hoping that's what America, that's what's going to be our next industry. | ||
| Funny shit we produce on the internet where eventually people figure out how to make a living just completely straight from the internet, creating either podcasts or web series or different things they do. | ||
| There's a lot of funny fucking dudes out there. | ||
| Definitely for entertainment. | ||
| This is the best time in the whole entire world. | ||
| Ever. | ||
| Like if you're a musician. | ||
| By the way, Honey Honey's new video that we're in, it comes out Thursday. | ||
| Oh. | ||
| And I think it's going to be on ifc.com or something like that. | ||
| Honeyhoneyband.com. | ||
| We're in a music video, bro. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really? | |
| Yeah, I was air guitar and playing with my butt. | ||
| Yeah, I was playing with his butt. | ||
| Nice. | ||
| No, we were just standing around looking like retards, really. | ||
| We were hanging out at a party. | ||
| We were at a date. | ||
| Other people got girls. | ||
| Man dates. | ||
| Yeah, we were on a man date. | ||
| Just going to reaffirm the haters. | ||
| Remember when you said to the director, you're like, hey, is it okay if we were just slow dancing or something like that? | ||
| They kind of talked us out of it. | ||
| That would have been cool. | ||
| I know. | ||
| I thought it would be cool. | ||
| Yeah, I think they were like, well, that would have been rude, though. | ||
| We're sending a weird message in the middle of their video. | ||
| It's not our business to do that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Turn your video into a gay love-a-thon. | |
| Yeah, they were at Coachella. | ||
| I listened in my hotel room. | ||
| I was in Fort Lauderdale. | ||
| And in the hotel room, I was watching a live Coachella feed on YouTube. | ||
| It's pretty badass. | ||
| It's great. | ||
| You go full screen with it. | ||
| It's totally HD. It looked amazing. | ||
| It was really fun. | ||
| Really, it was fun to watch. | ||
| They're fucking killing it out there, man. | ||
| They're going to be back next weekend. | ||
| Are they? | ||
| What are they doing this weekend? | ||
| Coachella again. | ||
| Oh, really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| She was on stage and talking about how Suzanne was. | ||
| The last time she was there, she was selling barbecue at one of the stands. | ||
| So she was like, you know, barbecue is the route to the stage here at Coachella. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Nice. | |
| She's so hot. | ||
| She's ridiculously talented, too. | ||
| Ridiculously. | ||
| That chick's voice is amazing. | ||
| I got a thing online with some fucking dude on the board who just got so cunty about some... | ||
| There's this chick named Nikki Blum, I think her name is, and she does that rendition of Linda Ronstadt's You're No Good while inside a van. | ||
| Have you heard it? | ||
| Mm-mm. | ||
| You haven't seen it? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Mm-mm. | |
| Dude, you gotta hear this. | ||
| Just put it on for a couple minutes because it's them singing this song in a van. | ||
| And this chick has a fucking incredible voice. | ||
| Just Nikki B-L-U-H-M or something like that. | ||
| You're no good. | ||
| Y-O-U apostrophe. | ||
| What did someone say? | ||
| He said some dude was Oh, some dude was shitting on it, like, you know, I was saying, you know, how much talent this chick has, and some dude was like, you know, no, that sucks, it's shit, this is better. | ||
| I fucking get crazy when people tell me that what you like sucks. | ||
| Like, why? | ||
| You don't like it, but you can't say it sucks. | ||
| That chick can fucking sing, man. | ||
| It might not be your style of music. | ||
| It might not be something that you would get into. | ||
| It might not be in the right frequency to tune into it. | ||
| You might not enjoy that kind of music. | ||
| But so many people enjoy it. | ||
| It's the one on the upper left. | ||
| The other one? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Nope. | ||
| Above it. | ||
| Above it. | ||
| That one. | ||
| Are you allowed to play it on your podcast? | ||
| Yeah, you can play this for a couple seconds. | ||
| Check it out. | ||
|
unidentified
|
One, two, three. | |
| They're just driving. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I heard this before. | |
| Listen to this chick's voice, man. | ||
| Brian, can you move your arm for a second? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Feeling better now that we're through Feeling better cause I'm over you I learned my lesson, it left a scar Now I see how you really are You're no good, you're no good Damn, that bitch can sing! | |
| Where's she smoking? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm gonna say it again. | |
| You're no good, you're no good, you're no good. | ||
| Baby, you're no good. | ||
| I love that voice, man. | ||
| Her voice is awesome. | ||
| That's like soulful, you know? | ||
| That's a... | ||
| Smokey. | ||
| Oh, dude. | ||
| It's a hot video, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Cigarettes. | |
| Really, it's inspirational, too. | ||
| I like that they're on their way to a gig and they're just playing in a van, you know, and she's just sitting there with an iPhone and recording it, and it's beautiful, man. | ||
| There's no special effects. | ||
| There's no nothing, and it's one of my favorite videos, man. | ||
| That's a, I don't know what it is, man, but a chick with a badass voice. | ||
| It, like, makes my body feel better. | ||
| It, like, it soothes me. | ||
| It puts me into a frame of mind that is almost unavailable to me without, like, beautiful girl voices. | ||
| I love the female voice. | ||
| It's incredible, right? | ||
| Sarah McLachlan, that's one of my favorites of the time. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, dude. | |
| I was in a pool hall in fucking White Plains, New York, and that first Sarah Palin video, or Sarah Palin, what the fuck's that? | ||
| Sarah McLachlan. | ||
| when Sarah McLaughlin video came up. - Listen as the wind blows. | ||
| How much of a- Possession. | ||
| Yeah, you know that song. | ||
| And I remember looking up and just going, God damn. | ||
| And the dude was like, hey, come on, man. | ||
| It's your shot. | ||
| I was like, I didn't even want to play anymore. | ||
| I wanted to watch that video. | ||
| I was like, I was hypnotized. | ||
| I was like, holy shit. | ||
| Live, she kills it every time. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, my God. | |
| Every time, man. | ||
| Dude, I went to last minute. | ||
| Sarah McLachlan was playing Hollywood Bowl about a year ago. | ||
| And I was like, I told my girlfriend, She's playing tonight. | ||
| I didn't even know. | ||
| You want to go? | ||
| It's not sold out. | ||
| My buddy told me, he goes, dude, it's not sold out. | ||
| He reminded me you should go. | ||
| So we went, just showed up. | ||
| Dude, we're just going to buy any tickets. | ||
| And some guy comes up and goes, you know anybody who needs two tickets? | ||
| You know, they were from work that he got. | ||
| Right, dude, like probably maybe 20 yards from her, right in front of her. | ||
| Amazing seats. | ||
| We totally locked out. | ||
| Right there in the front. | ||
| And she destroyed the Hollywood Bowl. | ||
| She went out there barefoot and she killed it. | ||
| She has this background, because obviously on record she does a lot of layers. | ||
| It's 10 Sarahs, sometimes three, sometimes four. | ||
| It's a choir of her. | ||
| But she has this backup singer that sounds just like her. | ||
| She's been with her for years. | ||
| Amazing. | ||
| She's like a star too. | ||
| She's the chick who makes Sarah sound good, because she's backing her up. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| They're both amazing, man. | ||
| It's crazy. | ||
| She's probably like one of the most famous background singers. | ||
| No shit. | ||
| And is Sarah McLaughlin still touring? | ||
| Is she still? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fuck yeah. | |
| Does she tour a lot? | ||
| Fuck. | ||
| She just got divorced. | ||
|
unidentified
|
She did? | |
| New life. | ||
| Oh shit. | ||
| Maybe like a year ago or something. | ||
| Brian just found his new wife. | ||
| Fumbling Towards Ecstasy. | ||
| That album, Fumbling Towards Ecstasy. | ||
| One of the greatest albums ever, man. | ||
| That's the one Possessions on. | ||
| That's track one. | ||
| That whole album is amazing. | ||
| Fumbling Towards Ecstasy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Incredible album. | |
| She has an insane voice. | ||
| I really hate that Stupid Pet commercial though, her song using her song in that business. | ||
| It really killed her for me. | ||
| The song you don't like? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, I don't like that song either. | ||
| There's a lot of songs I'm not really that into. | ||
| I mean, some albums, she only has one good song the whole album. | ||
| But I still love her because overall she's got like 15 amazing songs. | ||
| Even Surfacing had four or five great songs. | ||
| Are you trying to find out what she looks like, Brian? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Sarah? | ||
| She's still hot. | ||
| Plus she gets extra talent points. | ||
| Oh yeah. | ||
| You should be so honored to be in her presence. | ||
| Presence of her vagina. | ||
| If she let you into the fold. | ||
| I saw her on Valentine's Day. | ||
| Can you imagine you're hanging out and she's like serenading to you and shit? | ||
| You'd be like a little bitch. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I bought tickets for my girlfriend to see her on Valentine's Day in like 1998 and it was like the hottest thing ever to do. | ||
| My girlfriend wasn't really even into Sarah McLachlan at all until that show. | ||
| She got blown away. | ||
| It was an amazing show. | ||
| She kills everything. | ||
| Her voice is never off. | ||
| She's amazing, effortless, just, you know, angelic voice. | ||
| Yeah, I like some songs. | ||
| I mean, I love the Black Keys. | ||
| I mean, it doesn't have to be a girl singing, to get me. | ||
| But there's a certain thing that a girl singing does. | ||
| It's a different thing. | ||
| It's a different, like, girl. | ||
| Girls can do different things, you know. | ||
| They have more octaves they could sing in. | ||
| Yeah, it's just the way it reacts, or the way your body, rather, reacts to the beautiful harmonic sound of a beautiful female voice. | ||
| It's like, wow. | ||
| You know, your whole body just goes, wow. | ||
| It's an amazing thing what sound can do, dude. | ||
| When we think about the information that's being transferred between people. | ||
| You know, the lyrics and the notes and all of it together. | ||
| And the impact that it has on your whole body and your feeling. | ||
| I mean, there's songs that give you goosebumps. | ||
| There's songs that make you want to run up hills. | ||
| There's songs that... | ||
| I used to listen to Offspring when I would hit the bag. | ||
| Because Offspring is like... | ||
| Everything is like... | ||
| It makes you work out harder. | ||
| You listen to a fucking old Offspring album, that shit will make you work out harder. | ||
| The pace is so frenetic. | ||
| It makes you just a fucking attack. | ||
| There's nothing else that can do that. | ||
| No, a guy standing next to you is not going to do that. | ||
| There's something about music that's just like fucking... | ||
| The band I was in back when I was 18, Resistance, we're a speed metal band, we used to share rehearsal rooms with Offspring. | ||
| Yeah, they always used to leave the room smiling like patchouli oil. | ||
| I couldn't believe it. | ||
| They got so huge. | ||
| Like, holy shit, we used to practice with these guys. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| It's amazing. | ||
| Back at DC Sparks in Anaheim. | ||
| They have some of my favorite workout music ever. | ||
| Just fucking for going crazy, berserker style. | ||
| Like, for hitting things. | ||
| If you want to do rounds on a bag or something, listen to some offspring, it's amazing that really good music can make cardio actually go by. | ||
| If you put on a fucking badass album, especially if you smoke a little weed, and a lot of people think that's counterproductive to cardio work, but I say, how dare you? | ||
| Look at Nick Diaz. | ||
| Yeah, look at Nick Diaz. | ||
| The guys are super active. | ||
| Look at Joey Diaz. | ||
| Still alive and kicking. | ||
| Nick Diaz, Braulio Estima. | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I know. | |
| That's going to be May 12th, right? | ||
| May 13th? | ||
| May 12th. | ||
| Where is that fight? | ||
| There's a World Jiu-Jitsu Expo happening in Los Angeles. | ||
| I think in Long Beach or something. | ||
| I'm not sure. | ||
| Either LA Convention or Long Beach. | ||
| May 12th, World Jiu-Jitsu Expo. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And there's going to be a few super fights. | ||
| A lot of top jiu-jitsu guys are doing seminars like Robert Drysdale. | ||
| I think Andrea Gavau is doing a drama. | ||
| All the big dudes. | ||
| And Braulio Estima, who is arguably the best pound-for-pound jiu-jitsu guy on the planet. | ||
| Him and Marcelo are right up there. | ||
| He's going against Nick. | ||
| Do you know Braley at all? | ||
| Do you know Braley at all? | ||
| We've met a couple times. | ||
| He's been totally cool. | ||
| What a fucking great guy he is. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Did you meet him? | |
| I hung out with him in England. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Okay. | |
| Yeah, in England. | ||
| He was doing some translating over there. | ||
| A couple times I hung out with him. | ||
| He's a great guy. | ||
| He's a great guy. | ||
| So down to earth. | ||
| He's a really nice guy. | ||
| We were hanging around talking behind backstage. | ||
| Like at the weigh-ins at one of the shows. | ||
| If you didn't know him, man, you would never assume that this guy is one of the baddest motherfuckers on earth when it comes to jiu-jitsu. | ||
| He just seems so friendly and easygoing and so unassuming. | ||
| He's going to do MMA as well. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Dude, he's going to fuck some people up, man. | ||
| That jiu-jitsu is nasty. | ||
| He's so technical. | ||
| So good. | ||
| So what do you think? | ||
| Nick or Braille? | ||
| Who knows? | ||
| It's going to be awesome. | ||
| I would never say, even if I thought. | ||
| Listen, I'll tell you something, man. | ||
| Nick Diaz is the opening to my podcast, so I'll never say anything bad about Nick Diaz. | ||
| Braulio Stima's a motherfucker. | ||
| But it shows you how ballsy Diaz is. | ||
| He's not just taking a super fight against anybody. | ||
| He's taking a super fight against the best. | ||
| I mean, he's just jumping in and having an opportunity where he could get submitted easily. | ||
| He might shock the world. | ||
| Can you imagine? | ||
| Could you imagine? | ||
| It'd be like Triangle, Brawlio. | ||
| Can you imagine that? | ||
| Could you imagine? | ||
| That would be crazy. | ||
| Especially if he was high as Jesus on a space shuttle. | ||
| That would definitely make ESPN. Definitely. | ||
| That's going to have so much coverage. | ||
| Nick Diaz is a fucking UFC rock star. | ||
| He's going to do a super fight. | ||
| They never do that. | ||
| Hey man, he leg-locked Makako. | ||
| He finished Makako. | ||
| Nick Diaz can finish anybody. | ||
| If anybody sleeps on Nick Diaz, he can pass people. | ||
| This is the biggest Jiu-Jitsu match of all time. | ||
| I think so. | ||
|
unidentified
|
This is the biggest jujitsu match of all time. | |
| Yeah, because a lot of people thought that Nick Diaz should have got the nod in that fight against Carlos Condit, so that would make him, in their opinion, and that's not just a few. | ||
| I've said I thought he could have won, but I could see how you could score for Carlos too. | ||
| I would have leaned towards Nick, but it was a very fucking close fight. | ||
| Just say it was a draw. | ||
| Let's pretend it was a draw. | ||
| Or even just a close loss. | ||
| You're talking about one of the very best guys in MMA going up against the very best guy or one of the very best guys in jiu-jitsu. | ||
| That never happens. | ||
| Never. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Never. | |
| This is the biggest jiu-jitsu match of all time. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Strikeforce champion. | |
| I mean, when was the last time? | ||
| I mean, George St. Pierre jumped in and fought in Abu Dhabi in, what was it, 2003? | ||
| Five. | ||
| Five? | ||
| 2005? | ||
| Yeah, right. | ||
| It was LA, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, and he jumped in there, too. | ||
| He wasn't as famous. | ||
| He wasn't as famous. | ||
| Not as nifty as it is right now. | ||
| MMA wasn't as big. | ||
| This was all pre-Ultimate... | ||
| No, it wasn't. | ||
| Was it? | ||
| But that took a lot of balls from GSP. He said, fuck it, I'm doing Abu Dhabi. | ||
| GSP, he's another guy. | ||
| Look how fucking nice that guy is. | ||
| Remember hanging out with him? | ||
| He's the nicest guy ever. | ||
| Just such a sweetheart. | ||
| So unassuming. | ||
| Again, same thing. | ||
| So completely unassuming. | ||
| The fact that he would even allow me to teach him a kick. | ||
| That he would waste his time to come down to the gym to work out with me. | ||
| This is just that he would even try that. | ||
| It just shows you what a nice guy he is. | ||
| You know how crazy that video is? | ||
| You know how crazy? | ||
| Here we got George St. Pierre. | ||
| The Michael Jordan of MMA. MMA is the hottest sport on the planet. | ||
| UFC is the biggest sport on the planet. | ||
| Or hottest. | ||
| Rising. | ||
| Here's George St. Pierre taking spinning back kick lessons from you. | ||
| Even Bruce Lee doesn't have video like that. | ||
| There's no Bruce Lee video footage of Bruce showing the baddest fighter on the planet how to kick. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| There's a lot of things that I'm not that good at. | ||
| I'm just saying that video is fucking historic. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| What I'm saying is there's not a lot of things. | ||
| I'm not good at a lot of things, but there's a few things I'm really good at. | ||
| I'm really good at kicking shit. | ||
| I can kick shit hard. | ||
| That's something I've done since I was a little kid. | ||
| I've been throwing Taekwondo kicks since I was growing. | ||
| Since my body was growing. | ||
| Before YouTube, before the internet where it is today... | ||
| I knew how hard you kicked, man. | ||
| I was trying to tell people no one would believe me. | ||
| I'd say, dude, Joe Rogan kicks harder than anybody I've ever seen. | ||
| And they're like, dude, whatever, whatever. | ||
| Nobody believed it. | ||
| God damn it. | ||
| It's one of those things. | ||
| Anybody that just develops, if you spend 10 years working on one specific thing, look how good Marcelo Garcia's rear naked choke is. | ||
| Why? | ||
| Because he just hit that over and over and over again and put those numbers. | ||
| If you look at the way... | ||
| Jimi Hendrix used to play guitar. | ||
| Why could he play guitar so good? | ||
| Because he just hit those numbers over and over and over and over and it became a part of his body. | ||
| The thing you can learn about someone throwing a crazy spinning back kick is what's possible when someone just dedicates insane hours to one technique over and over and over again. | ||
| So my hands were fucking terrible, dude. | ||
| Until I was like 20 years old, I had no boxing technique at all. | ||
| I didn't develop my hands. | ||
| I'd learn how to throw straight punches, and I'd learn how to throw hooks, but when I would box with people, I would get killed. | ||
| My hands were always down low, my chin was up too high, I'd get punched in the face. | ||
| I used to box with my friend Mike Blythe. | ||
| He was a former professional boxer, and he used to beat me up. | ||
| He would make me not be able to kick him and just put the gloves on me. | ||
| He'd just kick my ass. | ||
| I didn't really know how to use my hands. | ||
| Because all that time was just spent developing kicks, developing kicks. | ||
| But when you're trying to be like a martial arts superstar like George St. Pierre, a mixed martial arts guy, mixed martial arts requires so many different skills. | ||
| You've got to work on your wrestling. | ||
| You've got to work on this. | ||
| You've got to work on that. | ||
| To develop one technique that takes an incredible amount of time to get really proficient at, like those spinning crazy kicks, those take a long time before you really develop that full body coordination. | ||
| Like that, the moves in the 360 degree roundhouse kick when you step and run at somebody, those are just like tying a shoelace. | ||
| It just sinks into place where it just becomes a part of your life. | ||
| I don't think, okay, now I'm going to step with the left and then I'm going to pivot on the ball on my foot and then put the heel down and then lift the knee up and then kick. | ||
| I don't even think that. | ||
| I just go... | ||
| You just go into it. | ||
| Like you do when you hit that twister roll. | ||
| How many times do you hit that twister roll? | ||
| When you're in side control and you hook that left foot under your knee, just go for a ride. | ||
| It's just a part of your body. | ||
| It's a part of the way your body interacts with this universe. | ||
| It's ingrained in you. | ||
| It's a path that's grooved and worn so smooth it just automatically goes. | ||
| You're executive producing. | ||
| You're not even making the commands no more. | ||
| You're just overseeing shit. | ||
| Isn't that a weird feeling, man? | ||
| Especially with jiu-jitsu, it's happening too quick for you to even think. | ||
| But all of a sudden, you've got someone's back. | ||
| There's just been this mad scramble of adjusting positions, and everything you've done has been completely on training, and everything you've done has been on repetition, and drilling, and just putting in the numbers. | ||
| And so then while you're live, while you're actually rolling, the mad scramble happens, and your hooks go in, and whoosh! | ||
| And you got a person's back and you don't even know what you did. | ||
| You don't even know what you did. | ||
| You barely know what you did. | ||
| You just sort of did it. | ||
| It's crazy. | ||
| Same thing with playing guitar or piano. | ||
|
unidentified
|
With anything, right? | |
| Shredding on piano. | ||
| They're not making any commands. | ||
| They're just kind of executive producing the project. | ||
| They're like, let's play that thing. | ||
| And the producers take over. | ||
| That inside, unknown producer. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Creativity is such a fucking amazing thing, man. | ||
| The ability to come up with something that wasn't there. | ||
| What a weird thing that is, that's so satisfying, you know? | ||
| And I know you feel it, Brian. | ||
| I mean, that's how Brian and I met, because Brian would just make everybody laugh at these silly fucking videos he would put online. | ||
| But you know that when you're putting something like that out there, and somebody reacts to it, and somebody likes it, and boom, it just lights you up. | ||
| Getting good at something, creating something good that gets recognized as something good, and creating something good where while you're doing it, it's sort of just playing out. | ||
| And then, ooh, there it is. | ||
| Now it's done. | ||
| I guess everybody just ran out of gas. | ||
|
unidentified
|
This is the fucking end of this goddamn podcast. | |
| So we learned a lot today, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
| We learned about positivity, positive experiences, love, flowers. | ||
| What I want to say is after that World Jiu-Jitsu Expo, that night in Hollywood, I'm having my birthday party. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes. | |
| Woo-hoo! | ||
| At Bardo in Hollywood. | ||
| It's on Vine, like a block north of Hollywood Boulevard to go to Bardo. | ||
| My band Smoke Serpent's playing. | ||
| Yes! | ||
| No cover. | ||
| Just say your... | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| No cover. | ||
| That's crazy. | ||
| You just said that on the Joe Rogan Experience podcast. | ||
| You're going to have what they call paggots. | ||
| Do you know what a paggot is? | ||
| What is that? | ||
| That's what the people on my message board call... | ||
| It's a mixture of podcast and faggot, so they call them paggots. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Well, it's no cover if you say you're there for my birthday party. | |
| Well, that's ridiculous, dude. | ||
| It's going to be overwhelmed. | ||
| I'm not even going to be able to come. | ||
| I'm not going to be able to fit in there. | ||
| It's going to be stuffed by the time we get there. | ||
| I doubt it. | ||
| There'll be like 12 people there. | ||
| You just fucked up, son. | ||
| You just fucked up, son. | ||
| Gotta put a high ticket price. | ||
| You're gonna have a bunch of weird dudes with weird colds. | ||
| They're gonna want to shake your hand. | ||
| No shit, no shit. | ||
| No, it'll be cool. | ||
| So it's after that World Expo out. | ||
| You go watch Nick Diaz and Brawley with steam. | ||
| I'll go home, take a shower, go get something to eat. | ||
| Then meet me for my birthday bash at Bardo. | ||
| Smoke Serpent's gonna rock the goddamn house. | ||
| Tenthplanetjj.com. | ||
| All my jiu-jitsu's up there. | ||
| Click techniques. | ||
| I'm thinking about being a backup dancer for this event. | ||
| I'm thinking about going in drag and being a backup dancer. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Let's do it. | |
| Be like a bodybuilder. | ||
| We need bodybuilders instead of... | ||
| A blonde wig. | ||
| Instead of strippers. | ||
| Bodybuilders? | ||
| Yeah, just oil. | ||
| I'm going to shave everything. | ||
| I'm just going to shave my legs for the first time ever. | ||
| Shave everything. | ||
| Just go up there all oiled up. | ||
| Wear some of my mannequin clothes. | ||
| Some of your mannequin clothes. | ||
| I've been buying... | ||
| Yeah, you got a lot of weird mannequins. | ||
| Dude, that fucking Linda Blair you sent me, that thing looks dope. | ||
| You're going to have an exorcist, a Linda Blair mechanical exorcist. | ||
| It got shipped out yesterday or today or something like that. | ||
| Oh, I'm so jealous. | ||
| I have to get an American Werewolf in London one. | ||
| I got a Predator one from that dude who came to the UFC. You could probably get the original one, dude. | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| That's ridiculously expensive. | ||
| But they do recreations. | ||
| The American Werewolf in London, they do a recreation of it. | ||
| It's just big fucking... | ||
| On all fours. | ||
| Eddie Bravo don't give a shit about that stuff, huh? | ||
| It's all good. | ||
| We all have different tastes. | ||
| And if anybody wants to learn some jiu-jitsu, you want to come to Hollywood, my friend, and learn how to put a choke in. | ||
| You come to Legends. | ||
| Legends in Hollywood. | ||
| I'm back. | ||
| My numbness is completely gone. | ||
| I've been wrecked for months, man. | ||
| I fucked up and pulled a muscle in my back. | ||
| One of the things that happens in jiu-jitsu, jiu-jitsu is so fun that when you get injured, you don't think, man, I've got to stop doing jiu-jitsu. | ||
| You just think, well, how long do I have to wait before I can do jiu-jitsu again? | ||
| Let me heal my shit back up. | ||
| So, I'll be there soon. | ||
| And that's Legends in Hollywood is on Santa Monica Boulevard and it's east of the 101. The address is? | ||
| It's 5176 Santa Monica Boulevard. | ||
| Enter on Kingsley. | ||
| It's called Legends MMA. That's where 10th Planet Headquarters is located. | ||
| Also, I got 30 locations worldwide. | ||
| Go to 10thplanetjj.com. | ||
| Also, I got some seminars coming up. | ||
| Phoenix, April 28th. | ||
| Spokane in May. | ||
| Chicago, January or June 9th. | ||
| Stockholm, two-day workshop in Stockholm, June 16th, something like that. | ||
| I got El Paso coming up. | ||
| Just go to the Nibiru Forum at 10thPlanetJJ.com. | ||
| That's where all the seminar info is. | ||
| Phoenix is first, though, two weeks. | ||
| When will you have something, smoke serpent, rather, have something that people can buy? | ||
| Oh, you can go on iTunes. | ||
| You buy it right now? | ||
| Yeah, you can go on iTunes and the song Jiu-Jitsu, which you could... | ||
| Also, there's a video for if you go to YouTube. | ||
| Search Jiu-Jitsu, Smoke Serpent. | ||
| We got a video up. | ||
| Dropped and Jiu-Jitsu are both available on iTunes now. | ||
| Are you eventually going to put a full CD out? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Track at a time as we finish them. | ||
| Alright, my brother. | ||
| As always, big time fun. | ||
| We didn't even get a chance to talk about Jon Jones and Rashad Evans. | ||
| Fuck. | ||
| I'm going to have to go with Jon Jones, man. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I think he's just too much. | ||
| He could get caught. | ||
| Rashad does have power. | ||
| He does have speed. | ||
| He does have explosiveness. | ||
| We might see Jon Jones just collapse and drop by a big bomb, but my money's on Jon Jones. | ||
| I think he's going to be cautious. | ||
| I think he's going to out-wrestle Rashad and beat him up on the ground. | ||
| Wow, that would be amazing to see, because Rashad looked amazing against Phil Davis, especially in the scrambles. | ||
| Wound up on top virtually every time, and his stand-up was just Phil Davis couldn't handle the stand-up. | ||
| Rashad was good. | ||
| He looked really solid, and before that, finished off Tito. | ||
| I think Rashad's pretty underrated. | ||
| I think one of the things that you've got to take into consideration is the fact they trained a lot together, so they're both going to know each other's little idiosyncrasies. | ||
| And I'm sure each of them have taken that into consideration and adjusted, but it's going to be fascinating to see what each one knows about each one. | ||
| I know there was some moments that they had talked about where Rashad had had success in training, when John was tired and he was holding him down. | ||
| They made reference to this many times. | ||
| So, it's going to be interesting to see how much Jon has progressed since then. | ||
| Because if you look at the way he fights, fucking guys, like, every time you see him, he's like this newer, better version. | ||
| More confident, more relaxed. | ||
| Total destruction every time. | ||
| Destruction. | ||
| I mean, the way he strangled Lyoto Machida and then just dropped him down there. | ||
| I mean, that's their common opponent, right? | ||
| And, you know, Machida, of course, was the first guy to, not the only common opponent, they fought Rampage as well, but Machida was the first guy and the only guy in the UFC to beat Rashad. | ||
| But Rashad won the Ultimate Fighter as a fucking heavyweight, and then dropped down to light heavyweight, and he's still one of the smaller light heavyweights, you know? | ||
| I think he's a dangerous guy for anybody at 205. And I think knowing as much as he knows about Jon Jones, this is going to be really fascinating. | ||
| Really interesting to see. | ||
| Because Jon is so... | ||
| He looks like a Muhammad Ali right now. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| He looks like a Mike Tyson. | ||
| He looks like a Sugar Ray Leonard when he was in his prime. | ||
| He looks like one of these dudes. | ||
| Like, man, this dude is just going to start dominating the world. | ||
| He's already dominating the world. | ||
| He's already destroying Shogun and winning the title and taking out Rampage and taking out Machida and putting him to sleep. | ||
| I mean, he's just on another level, man. | ||
| He's on another level and it looks like he's, what is he, 24 or something like that? | ||
| How old is he? | ||
| He's the youngest guy to ever win the UFC title. | ||
| I mean, I don't think he's even 24. Maybe he is. | ||
| What if you were in a coma the last fucking five years and you woke up and people were trying to fill you in on this Jon Jones guy and they were just telling you exactly what you just said. | ||
| All the guys that he totally went right through and destroyed. | ||
| It's incredible. | ||
| He would be blown away. | ||
| Yeah, I'd be completely... | ||
| He's 24. Yeah, he's 24. 24 years old. | ||
| And just every time you see him, you're seeing just a giant leap in his progress. | ||
| That age, when you're really young like that, god damn, you can learn quick. | ||
| God damn, when you're fully dedicated and as intelligent as he is, It's going to be interesting to see how good he gets at jiu-jitsu. | ||
| Because most MMA fighters, they get to a point, and once they become famous, their jiu-jitsu kind of plateaus. | ||
| You don't see famous guys in the UFC all of a sudden get amazing with their jiu-jitsu. | ||
| They kind of plateau once they become famous. | ||
| But Jon Jones, he hasn't plateaued yet. | ||
| His jiu-jitsu looks better and better. | ||
| When he gets really good, like Marcelo good, and he can't. | ||
| He's a bad motherfucker. | ||
| He can. | ||
| But you know what? | ||
| I'm really curious to see how they match up. | ||
| I'm really curious to see what happens. | ||
| I think this is going to be so fascinating. | ||
| Because obviously Rashad acted as some sort of a mentor to John in the beginning. | ||
| It's very obvious. | ||
| You know, there's... | ||
| There's so much history, and they're so good. | ||
| I think stylistically, Rashad's the most dangerous guy for Jon Jones right now. | ||
| If he gets through Rashad, then the big question becomes, what does he do now? | ||
| Does he go to heavyweight? | ||
| Who is he going to fight at 205 now? | ||
| Maybe Gustafson, because Gustafson just looked really good with Tiago Silva. | ||
| He could fight some guys, but there's no one standout guy. | ||
| Maybe Dan Henderson. | ||
| Dan Henderson stands out. | ||
| Dan Henderson said he wants a title shot. | ||
| He'll fight Anderson at 85, Or he'll fight Jon Jones at 205. I think he prefers to fight at 205. That could be interesting. | ||
| Henderson's a fucking beast, man. | ||
| You can't count him out with anybody. | ||
| Henderson's a scary dude. | ||
| And you know what? | ||
| Who knows? | ||
| Maybe Fedor goes at 205. Maybe he... | ||
| Can you imagine him cut up at 205? | ||
| Those guys are just too big for him. | ||
| Bigfoot was just too big for him. | ||
| He just couldn't handle it. | ||
| And the Dan Henderson fight, shit. | ||
| Most people lose to Dan Henderson. | ||
| And he was in it. | ||
| I think Fedor's still in the mix, man. | ||
| But I think he really needs to start training and eating right and get down to 205 and dominate there. | ||
| Yeah, well, he's certainly got still nasty skills on his feet. | ||
| His submissions have always been great. | ||
| It just doesn't seem like he fights with the same sort of passion that he used to have for it. | ||
| I think it's inevitable. | ||
| Guys, they have a certain amount of time in this game, and after a while, you hear him talk about it, and he says, you know, it's God's will, and it's this, and that. | ||
| He's really more into religion these days than he is, I think, into going out and fucking people up. | ||
| I've always been a Fedor fan. | ||
| I thought the days when he was dominating in pride, he was one of the most exciting guys in the world to watch. | ||
| He was amazing, man. | ||
| But all fighters, they go through a cycle, the greatest of all time. | ||
| They all go through a cycle where they're almost unbeatable, and after a while there's some deterioration or the talent pool increases, which is one of the things that I certainly think happened in the UFC. I think the talent pool has gotten bigger and bigger. | ||
| Fabricio Verdum, the first loss, you just cannot fuck around with Fabricio Verdum's guard. | ||
| You can't. | ||
| You can't play cute with that dude. | ||
| He just locks your shit up. | ||
| When I talk to Ryan Parsons about Fabricio, when he talks about how King Mo and Mayhem and all these guys were training with Fabricio, he said none of the ground and pound works. | ||
| None of it. | ||
| Fabricio just moves you around. | ||
| Just puts butterfly hooks in on you and moves you around. | ||
| They can't hit him. | ||
| They can't beat him up on the ground. | ||
| He's just too fucking dangerous. | ||
| That heavyweight, long build with a sick guard like he has. | ||
| If anybody gets on top of that guy when they're on... | ||
| Good luck. | ||
| You're in a fucking terrible situation. | ||
| That guy on his back and you're on top of him and you're fucked. | ||
| You're in a bad spot. | ||
| Unless he's tired because Overeem was in his guard. | ||
| That's true. | ||
| So he was really tired in that fight. | ||
| And Overeem's not really human. | ||
| What's the latest with Overeem? | ||
| They say they have some reason for why he tested over a certain number and they also say that the number he tested May not have been accurate as this is the rumors. | ||
| This is everything by the way is completely hearsay that I'm saying I don't have any direct from Overeem information Some people believe that he is going to be able to be licensed to fight and that they'll I don't know. | ||
| We're going to find out on April 24th. | ||
| On April 24th, that's when he has his hearing. | ||
| I don't know if the commission makes a decision on the same day. | ||
| I think they do, but I'm not sure. | ||
| But then we'll probably find out what the fuck they decide to do and what the situation is exactly. | ||
| If it was something he took, if it was something that's not true, if it was a mistake, it was a tainted sample. | ||
| I don't know, man. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| But, you know... | ||
| I mean, if you're going to look at a guy that you would think that might be using something that makes you look awesome... | ||
| How about the most awesome-looking body in the history of the world? | ||
| I mean, who's got a better-looking body than Overeem? | ||
| Cindy Crawford, Meg Ryan. | ||
| For girls. | ||
| For girls, yeah. | ||
| But for dudes? | ||
| Don't you think... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Meg Ryan! | |
| Out of professional fighters. | ||
| She was hot when she was young. | ||
| Out of professional fighters, who's got a better body than Overeem? | ||
| Nobody. | ||
| I like Sam Stout. | ||
| Do you like that? | ||
| He's got a very good body as well. | ||
| If he was as big as Overeem, he'd be equally impressive. | ||
| Vladimir Klitschko was on the flight from Fort Lauderdale. | ||
| Sat right next to Duncan. | ||
| Holy shit, is that guy big. | ||
| He's the heavyweight champion, one of them. | ||
| The two brothers, you know, there's two white guys, are the heavyweight champions right now. | ||
| We're living in a fucking crazy world. | ||
| Two white guys who are doctors. | ||
| They have PhDs. | ||
| How dead is that heavyweight division in boxing? | ||
| There's not much there, man. | ||
| There's nothing there. | ||
| He's big in Europe, and there's a couple other guys, but no. | ||
| And Klitschko's just boxing everybody's fucking face off. | ||
| When was the last time we had a heavyweight pay-per-view? | ||
| That's a good question. | ||
| Klitschko. | ||
| Klitschko, I think, has pay-per-views. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Maybe he doesn't. | ||
| Maybe he just fights in... | ||
| I know he's huge in Germany because he lives in Germany. | ||
| He speaks like a fucking hundred different languages or something. | ||
| He's a super genius. | ||
| He was playing chess on his iPad all the way back from Fort Lauderdale. | ||
| Kimbo might be the heavyweight champion. | ||
| Can you imagine Kimbo against Klitschko? | ||
| Come on! | ||
| Did you see a lot of people think that his last fight was a dive? | ||
| Have you seen all the criticism online? | ||
| I didn't even pay attention. | ||
| The guy came online that fought him and defended himself and made a lot of sense to me. | ||
| Sometimes people just get caught and it looks like a dive, but it's just you're tired and you get clipped in the jaw and your shit just gives out on you. | ||
| It is possible. | ||
| But there's also a lot of dives out there in this world. | ||
| Hey, dude, right now is the perfect time for Kimbo. | ||
| Come on, he could take over that heavyweight division. | ||
| Could you imagine? | ||
| Who else is in there? | ||
| There's nobody! | ||
| Vladimir Klitschko. | ||
| That could be a huge fight, dude. | ||
| Kimbo against Vladimir. | ||
| What the fuck are you talking about? | ||
|
unidentified
|
That would be huge! | |
| Oh my god. | ||
| Come on! | ||
| You really think that Kimbo could hang with Vladimir Klitschko though? | ||
|
unidentified
|
It would be huge. | |
| Just numbers wise. | ||
| It would be huge. | ||
| I bet you're right. | ||
| I bet for pay-per-view numbers. | ||
| It could save boxing. | ||
| Make a rematch out of it. | ||
| I say, you know, what if Kimbo just really becomes good at it? | ||
| You know, what if all the, you know, working on takedowns and all that shit, that's just not his thing. | ||
| He's got a bad knee. | ||
| You saw the YouTube videos. | ||
| The guy has a left hook. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And he's got a bad knee. | ||
| Apparently he's got like one knee that's like bone on bone. | ||
| Remember they did a thing on it on the Ultimate Fighter? | ||
| The doctor did an MRI on her or some shit and it's like you've got a real deterioration of your cartilage and your ligament. | ||
| So all that leg kicking and all that sprawling and shit and jujitsu, maybe that's not for him because his knee's so fucked up. | ||
| But if he could just stand and throw those hands... | ||
| Evander would fight Kimbo. | ||
| That would be a big fucking fight. | ||
| Can you imagine that? | ||
| Evander's still fighting. | ||
| He's like, how old is he? | ||
| That would be a huge pay-per-view fight. | ||
| He's got to be like 48 or 49, right? | ||
| Something like that. | ||
| Who would have ever thought? | ||
| Remember when he was fighting Riddick Bowe? | ||
| Remember those fights back in the day? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Those were crazy wars. | ||
| A small dude with a huge heart and a big guy that was real talented but didn't train that hard. | ||
| And they just fucking went to war. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Woo! | |
| Riddick Bowe. | ||
| Riddick Bowe was talented, man. | ||
| But he just never had the work ethic like Holyfield had. | ||
| He just never could completely get it again. | ||
| And then Gulotta came along and just fucked up his life. | ||
| Galata fucked him up. | ||
| Apparently they said the Galata beatings were really the beginning of the end for him. | ||
| He should have never lost to Galata in the first place. | ||
| The first fight, Galata beat the shit out of him and then dropped him with body shots of the nuts over and over again. | ||
| It was purposely hitting him in the nuts to get out of the fight. | ||
| It was the weirdest thing ever. | ||
| And that was it for Riddick Bowe. | ||
| After that, he was never really the same guy again. | ||
| Those are the days, dude. | ||
| The days of heavyweight division and boxing. | ||
| When it was like, that's what you'd look forward to. | ||
| You know? | ||
| Remember Michael Dokes? | ||
| Remember all those dudes when Tyson came along and just cleaned out that whole division? | ||
| Pinklin Thomas? | ||
| Roy Nelson could take over boxing. | ||
| I bet he could beat a lot of dudes, man. | ||
| Hell yeah. | ||
| Roy Nelson could beat a lot of dudes. | ||
| That guy's got an incredible chin. | ||
| Imagine how good his chin would be with boxing gloves. | ||
| His chin is good with MMA, with knees. | ||
| He takes solid knees to the face. | ||
| Dude, Roy Nelson versus Butterbean? | ||
| That could be on the undercard of Kimbo Evander. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Dude, that is actually... | |
| A great card. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Come on. | |
| That's a great card. | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
| But it would never happen. | ||
| Roy would never get it out of his UFC contract just for that. | ||
| Because not that many fights. | ||
| It would be huge though. | ||
| There's a lot of money in boxing. | ||
| We need a heavyweight division. | ||
| How many times have we started this music? | ||
| It's been like at least a million times. | ||
|
unidentified
|
A million times. | |
| I'm trying to get you to put it together, man. | ||
| Use your connections. | ||
| Talk to Bob Arum. | ||
| Bob Arum, if you're listening out there. | ||
| Kimbo versus Evander. | ||
| And then the winner of that gets Klitschko. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Boom. | |
| Boxing's back. | ||
| Boxing is back. | ||
| Roy Nelson against who? | ||
| Roy Nelson against who? | ||
| Who did we say Roy Nelson again? | ||
| Butterbean. | ||
| Oh, dude, forget about it. | ||
| Forget about it. | ||
| Is Butterbean still fighting? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fuck yeah. | |
| No? | ||
| He'll never quit. | ||
| He's so big, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He can't be. | |
| Yeah, he's way bigger than he used to be, and he used to be enormous. | ||
| He's huge now. | ||
| I mean, he had a cooking show for a while. | ||
| He's working on a Carlos Jr. Yeah. | ||
| He could put away some fucking food. | ||
| That's a big boy. | ||
| Big Alabama boy. | ||
| He was working on an American Top Team, too. | ||
| He was trying to do some MMA for a while. | ||
| Remember he fought Genki Sudo? | ||
| Genki Sudo leg locked him? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Alright, ladies and gentlemen, we've talked your ear off. | ||
| We appreciate the fuck out of you. | ||
| I appreciate everybody that came down to Fort Lauderdale Improv. | ||
| It was humbling. | ||
| It was awesome. | ||
| The enthusiasm, it's been just fucking incredible. | ||
| And I couldn't be more appreciative of all this shit. | ||
| I don't want anybody to think that this is anything that I'm ever taking for granted because we've been having a great fucking time. | ||
| Fort Lauderdale's been awesome, and this week I'm going to film my next comedy special at The Tabernacle. | ||
| On 420. Yeah, it's so corny, I had to do it. | ||
| It's going to be in Georgia, Atlanta, Georgia, at the Tabernacle Theater. | ||
| I believe the first show, I don't think there's any tickets left, but the second show, there's some tickets left. | ||
| There's an 8 o'clock and a 10.30. | ||
| I'm going to use them both. | ||
| So don't think that if you come to the 8 o'clock, you're not going to get on. | ||
| I'm going to use them both. | ||
| And most likely, it'll be a lot of different shit, and I'm going to do a question and answer thing at the end, just like I did on my first CD. So we're going to have a good fucking time. | ||
| And then the next night, it's... | ||
| Rashad Evans and Jon Jones, you dirty bitches. | ||
| Tomorrow, Tommy Segura joins us on the podcast. | ||
| Yay, Tommy! | ||
| And that's it, you fucking freaks. | ||
| We love you. | ||
| We're happy as fuck that you are enjoying this podcast. | ||
| And all those people out there that send us positive energy and positive text messages and tweets and all this shit on Facebook, couldn't be happier that I'm connected to all you guys. | ||
| I couldn't be happier that we're not all sort of together creating something that's more positive. | ||
| Death Squad for life, bitches. | ||
| Thanks to The Fleshlight for sponsoring the podcast. | ||
| Go to JoeRogan.net. | ||
| Click on the link for The Fleshlight. | ||
| Enter in the code name ROGAN and you will get 15% off the number one sex toy for men. | ||
| Oh, sweet baby. | ||
| And thank you to Onnit.com. | ||
| The kettlebells are coming. | ||
| The kettlebells are coming. | ||
| We've been talking about it. | ||
| I'll show them to you. | ||
| They're sick as fuck. | ||
| There's going to be two waves of kettlebells. | ||
| The first wave is going to be traditional kettlebells, and then the second wave is going to blow your fucking mind. | ||
| You're going to sell kettlebells? | ||
| Oh, son, you don't even know. | ||
| Wait until you see. | ||
| What are they calling them? | ||
| I can't tell you shit, son. | ||
| I'll tell you as soon as we get off air. | ||
| It's nuts, dude. | ||
| It's crazy. | ||
| Call it Joe Kettles. | ||
| You just have to see it. | ||
| It's ridiculous. | ||
| I'll explain it to you. | ||
| You'll see it. | ||
| You'll know. | ||
| But thank you to Onnit.com for everything they do. | ||
| It's the coolest company I've ever been involved with, bar none. | ||
| Go to O-N-N-I-T. Get in there and check out all the information about nootropics. | ||
| If you are interested in nootropics, please Google the subject. | ||
| There's a lot of information, both positive and negative, about it. | ||
| But I can tell you personally that I have been using nootropics for a long time, and I notice a Very tangible difference when I'm using them. | ||
| I use them before every comedy show. | ||
| I like to use them before I work out. | ||
| There's a bunch of different stuff we have at Onnit.com. | ||
| The big one is AlphaBrain. | ||
| If I had one supplement that I could take other than vitamins and minerals, if I could limit myself, even as far as athletic supplements go, I would take AlphaBrain. | ||
| That is my all-time favorite supplement. | ||
| It 100% works for me. | ||
| It's totally subjective though. | ||
| Everybody's body is different. | ||
| I don't know if you're as sensitive to good or bad. | ||
| I don't know if you're as into supplements as I am. | ||
| If you're not, if you buy it, if you don't feel it was worth it, you get 100% of your money back. | ||
| You don't have to return the product. | ||
| You just say this stuff sucks. | ||
| Alright, that's it folks. | ||
| We will see you tomorrow. | ||
| We love the fuck out of you. |
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