Jimmy Describes His HARROWING Near Mid-Air Collision On Southwest Airlines!
Jimmy and Stef recount a terrifying flight experience on a Southwest Airlines trip from Burbank to Las Vegas, where the plane made a sudden drop due to a near mid-air collision with a vintage military aircraft. Passengers experienced several seconds of weightlessness, with some hitting their heads and two flight attendants injured, as the pilot took evasive action following a collision avoidance system alert. Jimmy expressed frustration that the airline never contacted passengers afterward. He also described lingering effects, including a sense of trauma and unease during a simulated motion experience at the Las Vegas Sphere. Plus segments on the new efforts in Congress to censor pro-Palestinian content online and Stephen Colbert’s surprising flip-flop on Big Pharma. Also featuring Stef Zamorano and Mike MacRae. And a phone call from JD Vance!
Come see us in Oxnard, California, Rutherford, New Jersey, Manhattan, New York, Edmonton, Calgary, Vancouver, Appleton, Wisconsin, Rosemont, and Chicago, Illinois.
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Hey, this is Jimmy.
Who's this?
Hey, what's up, dude?
It's J.D. Vance.
Mr. Vice President, what's going on in Washington these days?
Oh, not much.
Same old thing, really.
People just doing political stuff, typical politics things.
Nothing really to report.
It's going to be a pretty slow summer, I think.
How so?
Congress is going home for a while, or that's what I heard.
Taking a five-week recess, just a rest, really.
Kind of a Congress nap.
Why is it doing that?
I don't know.
I guess they're tired.
Hey, Jimmy, did you see the Martin Luther King files that got released?
There's some pretty crazy stuff in there.
Did you see that James Earl Ray had a brother?
That's crazy.
No, that's not crazy.
Why can't you admit?
Why can't you admit that Congress is adjourning for the summer to prevent a vote to force the release of information pertaining to the Epsom case?
Because I don't want to.
Because we're just avoiding talking about that.
But that is true, right?
Oh, for sure.
Totally.
Yeah, no, Trump told Mike Johnson to disband Congress like fucking Charles I. And Mike Johnson did it because he's spineless and afraid of Trump and I think romantically attracted to him on some level.
But that's a story for another day.
Okay.
All right.
Look forward to that day.
Just a few days ago, Johnson said, you know, we think all the information should come out.
The people should know.
And then a few days later, sends Congress home to prevent them from doing that.
It's a clown show, dude.
It's a total circus.
Honk Honk, we're the government.
Well, I appreciate your honesty, I guess.
Jimmy, since it's you, I'm going to level with you.
Give you the straight dope.
I'm not going to give you the spiel I gave Tim Dylan.
Put enough barbecue sauce on it.
He'll eat anything up.
All right.
Come on.
JD.
That's a fact.
Well, look at, so why this scramble to prevent this information from being released?
Because there's shit in there that will bring down the entire government.
That's why.
Stuff that would ruin Trump.
Take it from me.
He is shocked that all of all the campaign promises he made, that this is the only one people are holding him to.
That's why this one.
God damn it.
I just figured they knew I was lying about this one for sure.
I mean, come on.
So what's he going to do?
Well, apparently, and I can't believe I'm saying this, but the idea is to cut a deal with Ghelane Maxwell, and then she testifies for Congress that Trump had nothing to do with their operations, and then she gets a full pardon.
Problem solved.
How do you think that that will be received among MAGA who made Epstein one of their top issues?
Not good.
That's my guess.
Although, who knows?
Maybe after Trump makes it all about himself and then frees the only person actually serving jail time for Epstein's crimes, they'll say, well, that about wraps it all up.
We're satisfied.
No questions, no notes.
Also, who knows?
My fucking balls might learn to talk on their own and start doing Abbott and Costello routines.
Both seem unlikely.
Agreed.
All this is leading to a massive political cataclysm of some kind that will inevitably lead to some electoral damage in 2026.
So I'm doing the smartest thing I can do, which is stay as far from the Epstein shit as I can and just look awesome in contrast.
Oh, yeah.
How so?
I'll tell you how so, Jimmy.
Okay, remember how I'm also the finance chair for the RNC as well as vice president?
Yeah, and that's insane.
Fucking bananas, but it's true.
Well, the other day, my wife, Lucia, and I flew to Nantucket.
Already awesome.
Sounds fancy, dirty limericks to host a fundraiser for the RNC.
We raised $3 million in one night from these rich-ass people.
Massive win, dude.
Good job.
But the headline in the media was, I show up to find a protest against me.
Oh, no.
JD Vanskop protested in Nantucket.
Well, who was protesting?
These people were in an Instagram group called Cats on the Couch for cat lovers.
And this event was called Meow Tuck It.
That's what they came up with.
They voted on that and everything.
Wow.
So yeah, say there's a guy who flies on a private jet to Cape Cod with his hot ass wife, gets rich people to give him $3 million just cuz, and these people don't like him are a bunch of childless losers who spend all their time on Instagram looking at cats and crying really hard for reasons they don't fully understand.
I'd say this is a pretty awesome dude.
I'd have to agree.
And they had these big posters of that fake photoshopped image of me, you know, where I look all distorted and it went viral, you know what I mean?
Yeah, yeah, of course.
Okay, even that, it's like, thanks for pointing out what I don't look like.
Like, they made me bald in that photo, which only underscores the fact that I have thick, luxurious head of hair.
Dang, sick burn.
Hey, Jerkface, here's a picture of you if you were weird and ugly looking, which we had to conjure up digitally because you are Not in fact weird and ugly looking.
Oh man, you got me.
I'll never recover.
Good point, JD.
Anyway, this is how I keep my head above water.
This contrast here: the people who hate me are cat losers who don't even know how to make fun of someone properly.
The people who are angry at Donald Trump right now are people who hate pedophilia.
Jimmy, as you know, you're only as awesome as your haters are lame.
And right now, I'm riding shotguns.
Ain't that the truth?
Boom.
All right, dude.
Keep it real.
Tell your haters to suck it.
I'm going to go back on the road and see if I can't get more millions of dollars.
That's some baller ass shit right there.
Yeah.
I love being around all this fucking money, dude.
Changing me and who I am as a person, and I fucking love it.
Usha tells me she doesn't recognize me anymore.
And I say, I can buy a new wife.
Okay.
That probably revealed too much.
Okay, back to awesome mode later, dude.
Okay, later.
Establishment media sets of augmented fighting.
So good luck.
Watch and see as a jackdog comedian speeds and jumps the medium and hits him head on.
It's the chimney tour show.
So I didn't go all the way up and hit my head.
I did float.
And the women in front of us, they went out of their seats, hit their head on the thing.
I went to Las Vegas to see David Blaine and Shin Lin.
I like magic.
Yeah.
And I know that's not cool.
It's not hip to say that you like magic.
I like magic and I like impressionists.
Yeah.
I know it's not cool to say those things.
I like them.
But so on our flight out, on our flight out from Burbank Airport to Las Vegas, we're flying Southwest.
And people are like, why are you flying Southwest?
Because they have a direct flight.
Why wouldn't I fly Southwest?
You think they're worse than anybody else?
But here we are.
We had an air hit.
Wow.
We almost smashed into another plane.
So I'm on the plane.
This is the Daily Mail.
This is their coverage of it.
So Steph did a little video.
And what happened was we're climbing.
We get just above 10,000 feet.
And all of a sudden, it was like we were in free fall.
City Perry and Gil King.
We were in free fall.
And then it stopped for about four seconds.
And I was like, wow, that was a big bump.
I thought it was because of the heat and there was an air pocket or something.
And we just dipped.
And then we dipped again.
And it lasted a while.
It was, it was what they call, I think, I think it's called zero G. So you know how when you see a guy's in the space capsule and they're floating around?
Well, that's what was happening.
Everything was just floating.
I had my passport.
That's my real ID in this pocket right here of this shirt.
No, it was a different shirt.
Anyway, and all of a sudden I see it floating in front of me.
And I'm like, oh, I better get that.
I grab it.
And it was, it was at least six seconds.
I heard another guy say it was 10 seconds.
It seemed like forever.
Like, oh, and the women in front of us, they didn't have their seatbelts on.
I had mine on, but I have it on loose.
So I didn't go all the way up and hit my head.
I did float.
And the women in front of us, they went out of their seats, hit their head on the thing.
And two of the flight attendants were just about to do a drink service.
Why did they need?
Why do you have to have it?
It's a 40-minute flight, literally, from Burbank to Las Vegas.
They got to give you a cup of water.
Why can't everybody just sit down?
Stop it.
I need alcohol for my next flight.
What is stories?
I don't know.
It's like, what is so?
Anyway, this is the video that Daily Mail had, Steph had given permission for them to use.
Here it is.
Okay, just a few minutes ago, the, uh, the, uh, the crazy turbulence on this flight.
Like, should we have to go for an experience before that?
It would.
Turns out that turbulence was the pilot taking an aggressive move.
Ooh.
Ooh.
Because there was another.
Stop.
that's what it was Steph gets it in.
She gets the joke in.
We're driving home.
We didn't.
We took another plane home because we're crazy.
So, wait, wait, don't bury the lead.
What genders were the pilots?
So after this thing happened and everybody's shaking, I thought, you know, who knew what was going to happen?
The pilot comes out and said, it took forever.
It felt forever for the pilot to come on.
It took at least a couple of minutes for the pilot to come on.
I'm sure he had to was screaming at aircraft for control.
And he comes out and says, hey, I'm sorry about that.
What happened was my traffic avoidance, my collision avoidance system warning went off and I had to take an aggressive mood to move to avoid another plane.
And I was like, are you kidding me?
So here's how NPR data from the live flight tracking website Flight Rider Toyota shows that Southwest Boeing made its ascent just before noon on Friday at the same time in the same airspace, a decommissioned Hawker Hunter.
So this is, these are defense contractors, and they're flying these planes from the 50s.
I don't know why.
I guess they're training somebody.
They're training military people.
I don't know why they're there, but that's what.
And so they were going, okay, so the flight radar radar shows that the flight dropped from 14,100 feet to 13,600 feet.
That's like astronauts.
So that's at least 500 feet.
I saw other reports that we flew.
We dropped 700 feet.
I mean, it was just bam.
And you were at zero G and you were floating like you're an astronaut in a capsule.
That's what it was like.
And people were friendly.
I was freaked out.
The woman behind us kept saying, oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
And she was saying exactly, she was screaming what we all felt.
And she, she, we could hear her.
And the guy right beside me, he grabbed my arm while it was happening, I was in the middle seat.
He grabbed my arm, and then he looked at me after he was, oh, I'm so sorry.
I'm like, oh, we're in it together.
Forget it.
And the woman behind us yells, I want to get off, which I thought was funny.
She said, I want to get off.
Oh, okay.
All right, sure.
We'll just stop the, pull up next to the ladder, that's that 14,000-foot ladder, and we'll let you out.
Speak it, manifest it by speaking your truth.
So, so this guy tweeted out, John Weissman.
He said he said, Your crew did what they were supposed to do, and so your aircraft didn't get dangerously close to another.
So he found this thing that tracks.
It shows you, it'll show you what the flight did.
This is what it's supposed to show you anyway.
So here's my flight that I'm on.
And then all of a sudden, here's Asswipe coming out of here.
And we're going to hit.
We're about to hit.
And then all of a sudden, my pipe, so that's when he does the dive.
It was two dives.
It was one dive and then another really more aggressive dive.
And so that's it.
You want to see it again?
I'll show it to you one more time.
It was scarier than you think.
And it was terrifying.
And when the pilot comes on and he said, hey, it was my collision avoidance.
We almost hit another plane.
I would rather he not said that and just said, yeah, we hit a pocket of air that happens very rarely.
We're fine now.
And then when we landed, he would have said, hey, guess what?
We almost smashed it up.
Don't tell me while I'm up there.
It was the longest 25 minutes to land in Las Vegas I'd ever experienced.
It was very long.
It was forever.
And actually, you know, you go and you're in shock.
Everybody was like in shock.
We're giggling.
We're relieved, but we cannot wait to land.
Yep, makes you high.
So here.
But did you ever get your water?
We did not.
So here's how NBC, so everybody called me NBC, CNN, CBS morning show on Saturday.
The NPR, everybody.
Chris Cuobo called me three times.
Not himself personally, but his producer.
We want you to come on the show.
And I said that was the only one I entertained going on because I wanted to punk him.
I was going to say something like, hey, Chris, whatever.
How come you got away with pretending you were hiding in your basement during COVID?
You made all that shit up.
But I was like, I don't want to do that.
I didn't feel like doing that.
I don't want to punk him.
You don't want to be killed again on a plane by a Lockheed Martin defense drone.
Listen, however Jimmy goes, it was murder, everyone.
For me, even if I die because of my own bad habits, know that I was murdered and it is a conspiracy.
And so I just didn't do any, I didn't do any of the interviews.
I have a PR guy now that I'm working with to help promote the special that's going to come out either.
Hopefully it comes out this weekend.
We're still waiting to hear final word whether Rumble is going to make it an exclusive to their viewers.
And if they are or not, I hope they do because then it'll help me recoup some of the costs.
I had to self-finance this special.
Anyway, here's what, and by the way, and I'll see you this Sunday in Oxnard, by the way, at the Comedy Club in Oxnard, California.
Levity Live.
Go to JimmyDoor.com.
And then we're going to be in Canada.
We're going to be in Calgary.
We'll be in Edmonton.
We'll be in Vancouver.
Go to JimmyDoor.com for a link for those tickets.
Here's how NBC covered it.
Tom, this happened at 14,000 feet as the Southwest plane was climbing out of the Burbank airport headed for Las Vegas.
A source with knowledge of the event says a Hawker Hunter, a vintage British fighter plane, came a Hawker to a.
That's what I keep thinking every time I hear him say that.
It was a Hawker to a.
She's got an airline now.
That's what I thought.
Anyway.
Dangerously close to the Southwest plane, setting off collision warnings and forcing Southwest to take evasive action.
Tonight, a pilot forced to make a dramatic dive mid-air to avoid a potential collision with another plane.
I've never felt anything like that.
And I turned to the people that I was flying with and I was like, I don't want to die.
I was terrified.
I thought this was it.
So that's what they wanted me to do.
They wanted me to do like these interviews and tell them that I was scared and whatever happened.
And I was just like, you know what?
I'm going to take a nap.
And I went and I took a nap and they said, can you do it later?
And I was like, no, I'm not doing this.
And then I just hung out in Vegas.
We went to dinner that night at Sinatra's at the Wynn.
But this is how I go out.
It happened on Southwest Airlines Flight 1496 from Burbank, Southern Cal to Las Vegas.
Southwest says its pilots got two TCAS alerts, terrain collision avoidance systems, serious warnings that they could soon collide with another plane and must change their flight path immediately.
The pilots climbed, then descended, according to the airline.
Steve Jelazwis was on board.
There was this large drop.
I want to say it lasted for eight to 10 seconds.
Just complete free fall.
I was like out of my seat, body out of my seat.
People were screaming.
Just felt like pandemonium.
Two flight attendants are being treated for injuries.
Jelazwic says he saw one of them.
She looked disoriented.
Her hair was kind of all of a mess.
She had an ice pack.
And they sat her down at the front and gave her an ice pack.
No passengers injured.
The flight continued on to Vegas, where Southwest says it landed uneventfully.
It's the latest close call in the skies.
Just last weekend, this video from the North Dakota State Fair captured a Delta regional jet banking and diving to avoid an Air Force B-52.
And on Monday, an Aeromexico plane landing in Mexico City narrowly avoided a collision with a Delta flight clear to take off from the same runway.
Tonight, Jelazwicz says he's just happy he's safely on the ground.
Tom joins us again live, Tom, quite the moment when that plane landed in Las Vegas.
Yeah, that's right.
We're told the passengers all applauded the fact that they were on the ground safely and a plot of the pilots who came out of the cockpit.
And the pilots then were shaking the hands of the passengers as the passengers thanked them.
The FAA.
Yeah, I didn't see the guy shaking any hands.
He was standing there.
The pilot was standing there.
And, you know, what are you going to say?
Hey, thanks.
Thanks for, you know, I'm glad you avoided it.
I just wanted to get off there.
And so we did.
Which by the way tells us it is investigating, Tom.
It's investigating.
And so guess what?
Southwest contacted us to make sure.
Oh, wait, they didn't.
They didn't contact anybody.
Southwest, nobody, isn't that something?
Turn curved up.
They didn't contact anybody.
Nothing.
and so the Hawker 2A plane is now blaming air traffic control.
Of course, they're going to blame air traffic control.
Of course, they're going to do that.
You know, one article that I read said that Hawker Hunter jet pilots, there's usually just one in that particular plane, only one pilot.
And one article I read, they said that the Hawker Hunter pilots were saying that it's the controller's fault.
And I'm like, pilots?
So were there more than one pilot in that Hawker Hunter?
Right.
Is that, did somebody, are there more Hawker Hunter planes that were in that vicinity?
So I'm trying to figure out why that was described as Hawker Hunter pilots stated that it was ground control's fault.
And I wanted to know, come on, why are those Hawker Hunter pilots doing something?
What are they doing flying?
What's going on?
What kind of training is happening?
Why do you need to do training in a commercial air zone?
And somebody was saying, oh, they can fly anywhere that they want.
Hey, maybe they feel the need for speed.
You saw Top Gun.
Yeah, I saw it.
So anyway, it was very harrowing.
And to think that I, wow, just to experience that kind of weightlessness and that kind of, I mean, it's the worst.
Think of the worst turbulence you've ever been in.
It was way worse.
Well, you know what's weird, Jimmy?
Is I actually felt closer to Lauren Sanchez.
I think we all are thinking about them right now.
Their bravery.
Bravery.
What they went through.
They didn't thank the pilot either.
No.
So anyway, so that's what happened.
And it was scary as hell.
We didn't get Southwest has not contacted anybody.
And I don't know if it's traumatized.
I feel traumatized.
Honest to God, I do.
So we went to the sphere the next day.
We went to the sphere.
And the sphere has this great show.
What is it?
Postcards from Earth or something like that.
But there's an interactive moment where the chairs shake.
The chairs shake and it feels like you're flawless.
Maybe before I would have enjoyed it.
Yeah, it felt like I was going to fall over a mountain.
And I was like, oh my God, it really repressed memory.
And anyway, and it was, yeah, it kind of, I'm like, oh, I think I do have PTSD a little bit.
I have a little post-traumatic stress disorder because I can't even enjoy this movie in this, like it's a big IMAX kind of a thing, and it makes you feel like you might fall.
I'm like, ah, yeah.
Yeah, no, it's not good.
You know, that same day when I got that text, a guy jumped over the fence of my backyard.
I don't know if he thought nobody lived here because it looks crazy, but I didn't chase him out with my Glock, and it was quite dramatic as well.
And then we had to call the cops.
Fucking nuts, dude.
It's nuts here.
You have a firearm?
Oh, yeah.
The cops said you should get one because it's, you know.
Yeah, I got you.
All right.
Yeah.
Well, I'm glad that that sounds like it's a separate segment.
I don't know why you're jamming that in this segment, but same day.
You think it's always the same day.
The military sends a drone to get Jimmy Doyle.
Jacko jumps my fence.
Yeah, maybe he just on Fenton meth, but I don't know.
All right.
So that's the story.
And we'll see you Sunday in Oxnard, California.
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People having thoughts that we don't like is unacceptable.
That's what he's saying.
You're not allowed to hate stuff.
You're not allowed to hate Zionism or Israel or genocide or any of that stuff or their control of our government.
You're not allowed to hate that.
That's called hate speech.
So the censors are at it again.
And of course, it's the ADL, which is the American Defamation League, right?
Or Anti-Defamation League.
And so basically, they're ironically named because what they do is they defame other, anybody who tells the truth about Israel, they defame them and call them an anti-Semite.
So the Anti-Defamation League is actually the pro-Defamation League.
And they're like the boy who cried wolf, and they've wrecked the word.
The term anti-Semitism is more burned out than Gary Busey at Burning Man.
Okay.
And here's it is APAC funded reps.
So Josh, a Democrat from New Jersey, he's an APAC tool.
And Don Bacon, a Republican from New England or Nebraska, introduced ADL back, Stop the Hate.
That's what it's called.
Stop the Hate Act.
And if anybody knows APAC, their hatred of hatred is world renowned.
In fact, they'll start World War III to stop hatred.
They'll assassinate hateful people with impunity and take out their entire family just to play it safe.
That's how much they hate hate.
They'll kill their kids to stop hate.
And so every day, social media company, so they're going to pass this bill, Stop HATE Act, to censor the internet and suppress anti-Semitism.
Every day, social media companies fail to comply with their demands will result in a $5 million fine.
So this is a $5 million fine to a media company that doesn't follow the rules set by APAC.
I'm not saying that this is going to backfire epically, but I would not want to be the people who made this legislation for the foreseeable future.
Here it is.
You want to hear them?
Bipartisan legislation will require social media companies to release detailed public reports of violations of their terms of service and to outline how they're addressing these violations, which includes the use of their platforms by terrorist groups.
Everyday companies don't.
The use of their platforms by terrorist groups.
Is it the IDF a terrorist group?
Aren't they committing a genocide right now?
Is that not terrorism?
What?
So terrorist groups is also aka people we don't like.
Al-Qaeda's okay, though, right?
Al-Qaeda, right?
That the head of Al-Qaeda in Syria is now the head of Syria, and Trump loves him.
So he got taken off that terrorism list.
You know who they put on that terrorism list?
The rapporteur for Israel from the UN, the woman who told you the truth about the genocide and the starvation that's happening.
She's now a terrorist, but the head of Al-Qaeda is not a terrorist.
Let that sink in for a while.
And so now this is the ADL.
This is APEC.
This is your Israeli overlords going to fine your media companies $5 million for not censoring you.
And the irony of having a guy named Bacon in on it.
It will result in a $5 million fine.
Social media companies can no longer hide the crimes that take place on their platforms, especially when they pose a threat to America's national security.
And we're very proud this bill has the backing of the anti-defamation league.
I saw anti-Semitism for the first time when I was 15 years old.
I had good parents who taught me it was wrong, but left a lasting impression on seeing my first incident.
So his parents taught him anti-Semitism is wrong, just not genocide.
Isn't that weird?
That's weird.
They also didn't tell him what it means.
I guess they couldn't.
It includes Arabs, by the way.
The word includes Arabs.
I can't believe it's used the way it's used.
It's a teenager.
And if you're on my social media, you see it every day from people that are responding back with what I consider clearly anti-Semitic kind of messages on social media.
I even saw an article today.
It was about me about time we all pose congressmen who are pro-Zionists, right?
And you're like, in other words, it's all over our social media and it's unacceptable.
And you know, people having thoughts that we don't like is unacceptable.
That's what he's saying.
You're not allowed to hate stuff.
You're not allowed to hate Zionism or Israel or genocide or any of that stuff or their control of our government.
You're not allowed to hate that.
That's called hate speech.
When the Jews that aren't happy with Zionism, I'm waiting to see how they handle that.
I guess they'll be thrown in the lot with the terrorists.
And let's listen a little more.
And what do I saw the protests out here the last two days?
They were vile, right?
They were.
The protests were vile.
Yeah, guess what?
That's called freedom of speech.
That's the whole point of freedom of speech includes speech that is vile.
That's the beauty of America.
And if you don't like that, we have freedom of speech here, you should go to North Korea or go to Saudi Arabia.
Go someplace else that doesn't have freedom of speech.
Get the hell out of my country.
Yeah, it's like, oh, yeah, I'm all for freedom of speech until, you know, until you say something I don't like.
You know, not so much.
Not so much.
I think Saudi Arabia lets you tweet about Zionism, though.
I bet they would.
You can see the anti-Semitism in their comments and how they were treating some of our members of Congress who are Jewish.
I saw that first behind.
It's unacceptable.
And so we want to be in a country that makes clear that you know what's unacceptable?
Censorship of people's hatred.
People get to hate shit.
And if you don't like what they're saying, don't listen.
They're already spending their taxes on Israel, whether they like it or not.
So for my money, I don't get to say whatever I want.
That's interesting.
That's just weird that you're not allowed.
So any protest, by the way, of Israel is anti-Semitic.
And why are people, I'm not anti-Semitic.
I have lots of all the Jews I know pretty much I like.
I'm not anti-them because if I'm anti-someone, it's not because they're Jewish.
I'm anti-them because of their supporting a genocide.
That would be why.
Because they're Jewish.
If you don't like it was a Jewish, it's very similar to saying it's okay to kill kids because they're Arab.
It doesn't work like that.
They purposely conflate Zionism and they had, what was that resolution they had in Congress to say it's the same thing?
The reason they had that is so this idiot, this Nebraska closet case, can stand here and go, somebody said I don't like he gives no examples of any anti-Semitism except someone against Zionism, which is not Judaism.
And hey, I think you're allowed to hate stuff.
You're allowed to be a vile person.
I think you should be, you know, you should be, this whole anti-hate speech stuff is just anti-speech.
This is that it's the speech you hate that needs protecting.
It's not the speech you like.
So if you hate hate speech, too bad.
You have to live with it.
That's how I feel.
And someone gets to be an anti-Semite.
You get to be whatever you want.
You don't get to think.
I don't want the government fining me for thoughts because that's all that is is thought crimes.
You think this will pass?
It's pretty egregiously against the First Amendment.
I mean, like, how would they get it passed all the way through?
Well, I don't know if you can tell in this video, these guys are scared because social media is over the target and the recipients have lost all grace and intelligence and are now just acting like animals barking at anything that moves now.
That's what this is because they know social media is they can control the corporate media.
They can control Wolf Blitzer and Chris Hayes and all of them.
They can control Sean Hannity, Rachel Maddow, Anderson Cooper.
They're all controlled.
Chris Cuomo, they're all controlled, but they can't control social media.
And that's what this is about.
This is about just what you said before, Kurt, when Hillary Clinton said, we've got to start censoring or we're going to lose complete control.
And that's what this is.
That's what this is.
This is the fear.
These guys are afraid.
And they're acting at the behest of their APAC donors.
This is Israel panicking.
This is the Zionists panicking.
And look at this creep, by the way, Bacon, with his dumb story.
Nebraska, did you say?
Home of the Franklin scandal?
Well, that's telling.
And you still screaming about anti-Semitism and defending Zionism makes you look like a piece of it to the world because you are.
Yeah.
Hey, how about that?
Epstein files.
Is that hate to bring that up?
You guy from the Nebraska Franklin scandal state?
Here's what Glenn Greenwald says.
He says, there was a full consensus on the right for the last decade that big tech censorship was a great evil, especially if pressured and demanded by the U.S. government.
That was a tenet of the right.
All that changed when it came time to censor for Israel.
We're very proud the bill has the backing of the ADL.
That's what they're saying.
So these people who for the last decade, they were all against the worst thing in the world was censorship online, especially if it was pressured to be censored by the government.
And now they're proud of it.
So whatever.
So again, most of the MAGA people that I come in contact with are not on board for this stuff.
Most of the MAGA people are not on board for the Israel projects.
They're not on board for Zionism.
They're against the genocide and they're against Trump and the administration and our government being cucks to the APAC lobby.
They are.
And Benjamin Netanyahu.
So that's most of the people I know, most of the MAGA people.
So can I not get away with calling him Bilbo not a Jew who anymore?
Is that what this bill means?
I think that's what this bill means.
What they would do is if they don't censor you and kick you off their Twitter, then you're going to get a $5 million fine.
That's what they want to have happen.
Not you, but the social media platform.
So they're trying to look collected on that.
So the bill would mandate that social media companies work with the federal government to implement moderation policies that curb the speech of groups the government designates as terrorists.
So that's all, again, all they have to do is say they'll say you're an biggest terrorist groups in the world, our environmental groups.
They call it echo terrorism.
So that's what they arrested the lady from Democracy Now.
They said she was an echo terrorist, right?
Because she was out there protesting against the pipeline, a pipeline going through Native American land.
And so they just said they're all echo terrorists.
And then they don't get any rights.
You can lock them up for all you want.
They don't have to do it.
If they call you a terrorist, then you don't get habeas corpus.
They can give you indefinite detention, meaning they don't have to charge you with a crime.
That's the world we live in now.
That's what indefinite detention means.
They'd be required to provide regular reports to the U.S. Attorney General.
Those that don't comply would be fined $5 million each day that they refuse.
Bacon, the guy, what a great name for this pig.
We want to be in a country that makes clear that anti-Semitism or any kind of racism is repugnant, unacceptable, not allowed in an online space, and that we have zero tolerance for it.
I agree with half of it, that anti-Semitism or racism, that they are repugnant, but they shouldn't be censored.
Because who gets to decide?
Who gets to decide what's anti-Semitic?
Who gets to decide what's racist?
Who gets to decide?
Now, are jokes going to be censored?
Again, you don't, are you going to appoint a board to decide what is it?
You know, it's going to be the ADL or maybe Dave Portnoy.
However, other statements from the lawmakers make clear that their definition of anti-Semitism goes far beyond expression of hatred or calls for violence against Jewish people.
No kidding.
As Matthew Petty wrote for the libertarian magazine Reason, the specific idea that Bacon had in mind was anti-Semitism.
And he made clear that it includes criticism of the state of Israel.
That's anti-Semitic.
So now they can censor you.
At the press conference, Bacon explicitly referenced recent protests against Israel's policy of starvation in Gaza.
That's the problem, not the starvation in Gaza.
Yeah.
I saw protests out here the last two days that were vile, right?
He said they were.
You can see the anti-Semitism in their comments and how they were treating some of our members of Congress who are Jewish.
I saw that firsthand.
So live with it.
Are you going to read the comments?
No?
You're just going to say you saw some comments.
I'm supposed to believe you?
I think the current definition of anti-Semitism includes not having personally killed a Palestinian.
I haven't killed a Palestinian.
Well, you're an anti-Semite.
Bacon, he also suggested that merely stating opposition to pro-Israel congresspeople, including himself, constitutes anti-Semitism.
Do you see what's happening?
This is like what the left was doing for the last 10 years on steroids.
I even saw an article today.
It was about me, but talking about we have to oppose congressmen who are pro-Zionist, right?
It's all over our social media and it's unacceptable.
No, no, that's accepted.
It's very acceptable.
Opposing this congressman is what made him realize he had to act immediately.
Is that what he literally just said?
Exactly.
So there's going to be a list of things on the tombstone of Zionism.
And one of them is going to be hyperbole because that's what this is.
When you say that criticizing someone's Israeli policy is anti-Semitic, that is unbelievable hyperbole.
Bacon, I'm going to say way worse things about you very shortly on social media.
Don't get, you know, pace yourself getting upset.
The two congressmen were also at the forefront of calls for the U.S. government to ban TikTok, which Gothamer said was being used by the Chinese Communist Party to boost anti-Israel and pro-Amas videos In the United States, they don't want you being able to have free speech.
They don't want you to be able to say what you want to say.
That's all this is.
This is control.
These are thought crimes.
You're allowed to hate shit.
You can hate whatever you want.
You're allowed to be a racist in America.
We can start putting people in jail because you say they're racist.
They would also have introduced legislation that would criminalize efforts to boycott Israel products.
Greenblatt, who spoke alongside the two legislators on Wednesday, has explicitly said that anti-Zionism is anti-Semitism.
No, it's not.
Explicitly is not.
It explicitly is not.
Exactly right.
You know what a scumbag group ADL from its inception?
What an evil group it is?
It was to cover up for some scumbag child molester that they pretend was innocent and he was not.
And that's not why it's called the innocent.
It's not called the innocence project.
It's called anti-defamation.
Because they're saying this guy, this guy basically framed a lower black employee like a janitor for the crime he did.
And a coalition in the deep south of black and white people hung the guy.
Back in segregation times.
That's how scummy the guy.
So his very rich family formed this organization, which is why we can't acknowledge the Armenian genocide to this day because the ADL, when Abe Foxman was there, was like, he lobbied to not recognize any other Holocaust, but the main one.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's one of the worst, most evil groups that ever existed.
Though he's faced criticism for this stance, including from members of the ADL itself, he has only continued to double down.
And you can double down on comedy this Sunday at Oxnard.
Come see me telling jokes in Oxnard, California, or Calgary, Edmonton, Vancouver.
Go to jimmydoe.com for a link for tickets.
In one infamous exchange during the outbreak of pro-Palestinian protests on college campuses in 24, Greenblatt suggested that students wearing kafifas or kafifas, I don't know how you say that.
A kind of scarf commonly worn by Palestinians, they were doing the equivalent of wearing a swastika.
Oh, let's make laws around your Woody Elon neurosis, maniac.
Yeah, right?
You know what that means?
You know, at one time, I might have told the ADL to stop doing all this, but I've come to realize that nothing will shorten their tenure in this world faster than just letting them go right ahead and tell everyone who they really are.
There's only two kinds of people who are surrounding these people now.
They're the ones who are looking for a way out of an association with them and the ones who want to get rid of you to save their own name.
You're encircled by a Shakespearean group of frenemies.
By the way, the original name of the Zionists who founded Israel was the Zionist Fascist Party because they were fascists.
They just dropped the fascist part later after the war.
But they were called the Zionist fascists, not just Zionists.
That's the original name of the people that founded Israel.
The Zionist fascists.
Katie Albert would add it on.
And I wouldn't have known any of this stuff if it wasn't for how they responded to the October 7th attacks, which they enabled and financed.
They certainly financed.
Who's they?
Benjamin Netanyahu and the Israeli government.
Meanwhile, Greenblatt's, the good deli that I liked in LA, closes down, and this asshole still works.
Greenblatt's closed?
Yes.
COVID.
Next to the Laugh Factory?
Yes.
So what's in there now?
I don't know.
Nothing.
That was my favorite one that was by me.
I didn't like the one.
Cantor Stinks.
Greenblatt's was so much better.
Completely gone.
And yet this Green Blatt still goes on.
Okay, so here is something very surprising because we have Stephen Colbert saying exactly one thing before Trump was elected and then saying the exact opposite after Trump was elected.
Is that surprising, really?
Very unlike what I'm going to be doing August 3rd in Oxnard, California.
Come see me do stand-up there at the Levity Live.
Go to jimmydoe.com for a link for tickets or in Rutherford, New Jersey, or in Manhattan at the Village Underground.
Mays found this.
He said in the summer of 2020, Stephen Colbert aired a sketch warning people to be skeptical of vaccines and big pharma.
11 months later, when Biden was president, Colbert was dancing for the vaccine.
Colbert is one of the most partisan, shameless shills that America has ever seen.
You think he's kidding?
Let's watch.
Some folks are skeptical.
Thankfully, Big Pharma has come up with a way to reassure the public about their motives, and it's all in their new ad.
So this is him making a fake ad, lampooning pharma as the lying criminals that they are.
This is before Biden became president.
This is when everybody was going to be skeptical of the vaccine because Trump came up with it.
Remember that?
Joe Biden said so.
Kamala Harris said, I'm not going to take it if Trump comes up.
They all said that.
And so Joanne Reed said it.
She shrunk her wig in the wash.
She used to go, I ain't taking that.
And here's Colbert saying the exact same thing.
This was in, what was this?
Was this in the summer of 2020?
This is before the vaccine came out.
This is the kind of stuff Stephen Colbert was saying.
Some folks are skeptical.
Thankfully, Big Pharma has come up with a way to reassure the public about their motives.
And it's all in their new ad.
Are you worried about the future?
Unable to sleep at night.
Afraid that pharma companies will put their profits ahead of your health.
If you are concerned about the cost of a vaccine, ask your doctor about Vaxillax.
Vaxillax is the only medication proven to reduce anxiety about big pharma taking advantage of you in a national crisis.
You can trust Vaxillax because of its mascot, Professor Cashington, the ethical money sack.
Side effects of Vaxilax include legless rest syndrome, kidney rhinestones, crumble foot, spontaneous beard sparrows, the galloping hoopsticks, spinal crunch wrapping, Ferdinand's flopsy, big old pink face, Gordon's Fisherman syndrome, scrotal yodas, chronic vaccine resistance, facial graham crackering, full-blown coronavirus, and dolla-dala viljo.
The vaccine.
so that's what he was saying in the summer of 2020.
Yo, who's his writers?
Because they wrote that for him.
Because his writers wrote that for him, and he was scumbags for that, dude.
And no, that's what they should have been writing.
That's this kind of stuff you should always say.
For writing that, I didn't know that.
For writing that and then going to the vaccine dance later, that means you're smart enough to come up with that and then later you forgot about it like you're fucking Amy Goodman forgetting about Fauci.
And so then after Biden was president, this is what he was doing.
needs to have the vaccine.
you Yeah.
Yeah, I guess.
Unless that's his band playing.
I bet it's his band playing.
So, no.
So that doesn't matter.
That's him doing it.
So he went from.
The strips are dead now.
He went from that.
I wonder if they're all dead.
That's strokes from climate change.
From climate change or watching TV late at night.
So Stephen Colbert is a good altar boy.
That means he says whatever he's told to say by an authority with their hand up his ass.
That is most, that's one of the most remarkable things I've ever seen.
I didn't know that he was taking the piss out of Big Pharma during COVID before Biden became president.
I didn't know that.
Well, there it is.
Great catch by Mays.
So that's just one year apart.
Yo, there's no excuse.
He's a pure evil scumbag for that.
How do you do that?
And then I give Chris Cuomo more leeway because I think he's dumber than Seema Colbert.
You ever see somebody of note say something and then immediately after do or say the exact opposite thing?
Like the deep state met them out in the parking lot and straightened them out because that's what that seems like.
This is Colbert's humiliation ritual punishment, betraying his base, losing every shed of remaining dignity.
But this was he was made in a lab.
His dad was the Fauci before Fauci.
So, and he's a Jesuit scumbag like Fauci.
So that means this improv piece of garbage is programmed probably from a very young age to be like this.
A mindless authority puppet.
Okay.
And he was probably programmed in a terrible way.
That's my guess.
And so this is a guy who's supposed to be anti-establishment.
It's the guy supposed to be taking the piss out of the powerful and the politicians and the liars.
Here's a video of him dancing with a mask.
Watch it.
Who's that guy?
That's Chuck Schumer.
That's Chuck.
So if you see Chuck Schumer waves him over, come on, Steven, dance with me.
Come on.
And Stephen Colbert.
Oh, and they're wearing their uniform, khaki.
They're using khakis and a blue shirt.
Yeah.
It really works the clots out from the booster.
And there he is.
High fives, Chuck Schumer.
It's totally normal looking, Jimmy.
That poor intern.
And everybody's just standing around watching the powerful dance.
With masks on.
With masks on masks on.
The burqa of the face.
I wonder where Stephen Colbert's mask is.
By the way, this is when they ran all the funny male writers out and they were putting in like those white liberal woman fish speaker improv chicks to write.
And they all think a bit is just doing a dance.
And so stupid ghostbusters, female ghostbusters.
Then there's a dance scene because we're dancing like no one's watching, but everybody is watching and they paid.
So remember when he tried to pretend that CNN is impartial and they're objective news?
Watch this.
His own audience laughed at him.
Remember this.
People forget this.
His heels by this, and he's not really sure how to go after Vice President Harris.
He knew his attack lines on President Biden.
He really has struggled with how to go after someone who's 20 years younger than him, who is a different gender, a different race.
It's kind of been this moment where he has not been able to coalesce around a single attack line.
I know you guys are objective over there that you just report the news as it is.
Oh, I know.
A CNN makes it not.
I know that.
I know that my audience just laughed at me because I'm so obviously lying.
He's making a joke.
He's being honest.
They thought I was being honest and making a joke.
But what I'm actually doing, I was trying to bullshit my own audience and they laughed in my face.
Please don't have me beaten.
You want to watch that again?
Because I want to watch it again.
You just report the news as it is.
Oh, I know.
CNN makes it.
okay I know you guys are objective over there that you just report the news as it is.
Oh, I know.
A CNN makes it that noise.
Is that supposed to be a laugh line?
It wasn't supposed to be, but I guess it is.
I guess it is.
I guess I'm here lying for the establishment and they caught, they caught me.
You can't because laughter is involuntary.
I guess it is a laugh line.
Yeah, you mean you just unwittingly said the funniest thing you ever said on your show, unwittingly, because you were actually trying to lie.
You were being a phony.
He was being a phony liar.
He showed he knows he is right there.
Right there.
He's showing you, look, I did my best.
Yeah.
Sounds like a joke, but I am following orders.
He's showing you that he's doing it on purpose and it ain't like he's doing it.
I found this video of me.
So Stephen Colbert interviewed Barack Obama recently.
And I guess this is because I had gray hair.
So here he is.
Here I am covering Stephen Colbert interviewing Barack Obama.
Just watch this.
Can we just take a moment?
Can I just, and I want to talk.
I just want to take a moment to drink you in.
I would just like to take a moment to ram the biggest fucking cock in the world right in his face.
Thank you.
Thank you.
That's a good Catholic.
But you would have to take the number to get in the back of the cock line.
Yeah, clearly.
Clearly.
Like, He's a good Catholic.
He teaches Sunday school.
So now the biggest pieces of shit in the world are for sure Sunday school teachers.
What a fucking little waste of a life.
What a waste of a life to go from doing the best comedy show in the world to being the biggest ball washer of criminal establishment.
War criminals, murderers, the guy who prosecuted journalists, the guy who left those people in Flint high and dry, the guy who kicked 5.1 million fields out of their house who opened the Arctic to drilling, who built those cages.
I just want to drink you in.
That's the kind of psychosis that happens when you're handed a network television show by Les Moonvez and millions of dollars to go with it.
More money than he can ever spend.
That's what happens to you.
That's a guy who used to play a character that made fun of this guy.
Now he is that character.
He became the character.
So you want to hear it again?
Can we just take a moment?
Can I just, and I want to talk.
I just want to take a moment to drink you in.
Yeah, drink him in like Obama drank that Flintwater.
Just a little kiss on the tip.
Then I run to a helicopter.
Colbert's wearing his ankles for earrings.
Like, come over here.
Let me drink you in.
I don't know how long I'm going to be doing this, but I just want to keep reminding people of what garbage people that the Democrats, they're not the left.
They call themselves left.
They're not.
They're the Democrats.
are propping up.
It's unbelievable.
He became the character he used to play on TV.
He became that character.
He's an asset of the New World Order.
No, that's all it means is that's what that rally for sanity, him and Stewart did.
Yep.
Would they promote that?
Bruce Kingstein mediocre shit.
Even Bill Maher called out Stephen Colbert and Jon Stewart for doing that.
That rally that did, Rally for Sanity.
He said, hey, here's an idea.
When you have 100,000 people show up in Washington, D.C. for a rally, why don't you make it about something?
That's what Bill Maher said.
I thought it was about genocide, but at least I took a stand.
Why don't you make it about something?
It was about nothing.
Yeah.
It was about Jon Stewart gave a speech and it was about how we need to be nicer in traffic.
Hey, we should all get your salary too, John.
You absolute cutoff from the world idiot.
A man who's only counseled by Yentas.
So you could do this all day.
Great job by Mays, by the way, for finding that.
A complete 180 flip-flop.
So that's what everybody was supposed to be doing, by the way.
So all my comedian friends, I thought we were all supposed to be making fun of Big Pharma and being suspect and skeptical of them around COVID.
And it all ended as soon as Joe Biden became president.
That all ended.
Money's not coming from them, is it?
Because Colbert worked on networks and CNN, as we know with Anderson Cooper, they indirectly, through a series of things, are paying their salaries.
So you're going to be a good company man, aren't you?
If through a couple of cutouts, you're being paid to be what you are.
I didn't realize, I thought maybe he's like a hypnotized Manchurian candidate.
I didn't know he's so intentional on it.
That's how naive I am.
So I saw him say that thing about Big Barma.
And then his skunk.
Who are the writers that wrote that?
I mean, I hope they quit and protest later, right?
Because they wrote that bit that really summed it up.
Right?
And then I hope they.
Yeah.
So how could his writers write that first thing and then also write all that the vaccine dance number for him?
I've been in writers' rooms and I've been like where I got shouted down because there's no way I wouldn't have brought that up.
In a race room, were we just talking about how they suck?
Yeah.
And I already know the kind of people.
They're all improv.
They're all upper class.
They know Nick Roll kind of people.
Yeah, well, and they all are going to, you know, and his dad's for the CIA Wall Street company.
That's Nick's.
I love Nick Crow's show, but, you know, that's where he comes from.
Real.
And that's what all those improv people were.
They came from real good families that are connected to big shit.
And they were always going to be on TV.
By the way, you can have it.
That's crazy.
How would you not like hang yourself with Brigitte McCrone's dick if you had to flip-flop like that?
And they all did it.
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All the voices performed today are by the one and only, the inimitable, Mike McRae.
He can be found at mikemcray.com.
That's it for this week.
You be the best you can be, and I'll keep being me.