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June 25, 2020 - Jimmy Dore Show
01:06:27
20200625_TJDS_20200624_Podcast
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Time Text
Get ready for an outstanding entertainment program.
The Jimmy Dore Show.
Wow, Bernie Sanders is on the phone.
I hope he's not in a bad mood.
Hello, this is Bernie Sanders, and I am not in a bad mood.
I'm just fucking tired.
All right.
Why is that, Bernie?
Oh.
I hate myself.
What have I done?
What is wrong with me?
I can't help you, Bernie.
You didn't have to drop out.
You didn't have to endorse Joe Biden.
No, I just put a grocery bag out on my kitchen table.
Now I got to resanitize the goddamn thing all over again.
Or was the table infected, and now I got to sanitize the grocery bag?
I can't remember.
What did I touch last?
Then where?
Jerry!
Oh, I thought you were upset with yourself over endorsing Joe Biden.
Sorry.
No apology necessary, Jimmy.
Jay!
So you think Biden can defeat Trump?
Yes, because Joe and I are busy building new policy-focused task forces on climate change, criminal justice reform, healthcare, and then so on.
Come on, Bernie.
Task forces.
That's why people don't take you seriously anymore.
Fuck you.
Who's on these tax forces anyway?
Some fresh new faces.
We got John Kerry on climate change.
Eric Holder on criminal justice reform.
No.
And Pramila Jayapal on healthcare.
No, she's good on health.
Promila Jayapel.
And what if Joe Biden doesn't pay attention to these task forces?
We have a task force for that.
It's called the Task Force Task Force.
It's small settlement from here on in, bud.
It's in the bag.
Is that what Biden told you?
Not exactly.
We haven't spoken in weeks.
He doesn't know how to answer his telephone.
Hello, I can't hear you.
He says, you got the mute button on again, Joe.
It happens every day.
He tries calling me with the mute button on.
Then he'll say he called me back five times, but it's not my number.
He's calling.
When I finally do get him on the phone, he's like, I called you five times already.
You didn't pick up, you know, and so on and so forth.
Then how do you two communicate?
We are now assembling a phone task force.
So it looks like your unity task forces are populated by Biden, Harris, Obama, and Boudigan surrogates who lied about you for over two years.
But Alexandria Cortez says it there somewhere.
I respect Joe Biden.
And when the party moves, Joe Biden has always followed.
The party has always moved to the right.
With these task forces, we're a shoe-in.
Oh, and another 90,000 American deaths shouldn't hurt Joe's chances either.
That really says a lot about Democrats when their ace in the hole is Donald Trump's deadly negligence.
If there's anything I hope we learn from this painful epidemic, it's that we must create a government that works for all, not just wealthy campaign donors.
Now shut up and vote for the guy with all the wealthy campaign numbers.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Establishment media sets on its fighting.
Good luck.
Bullshit.
We can't afford.
We're fomenting this.
Oh, oh, oh.
Watch and see as the jack off the medium speeds and jumps the medium and hits them head on.
It's the Chimmy Tour Show.
Chimmy Tour Show.
Welcome to this week's Jimmy Door show.
We've got a lot on today's show, so let's get right to it.
What's coming up?
Donald Trump retweets journalist Max Blumenthal and all hell breaks loose.
Plus, Dr. Fauci is a liar who knowingly and purposely lied to the American people about coronavirus.
Say it ain't so, but it's so.
Plus, masks really are safe.
They really do save you.
They're really good for making you not get coronavirus, no matter what Fauci says or the government.
Plus, a woman is arrested outside the Trump Tulsa rally.
Plus, we got phone calls from Vince Vaughn, Bernie Sanders, Al Pacino, Barack Obama, and Harrison Ford.
Plus, a lot lot more.
That's today on the Jimmy Dore Show.
Jimmy Dore Show.
Hey, this is Jimmy.
Who's this?
Jimmy, baby, it's Double V. Oh, hey, it's Vince Vaughn, conservative actor and friend of the show.
How are you, Vince?
What's up?
I'm doing fantastic, James.
I couldn't be better.
Vince, where are you?
Are you sheltering in place or are you at home?
I'm at the groove, baby.
The grove, Vince.
You're not supposed to be out and about.
Oh, because of the virus?
That scary, scary virus?
Yeah.
Oh, I'm going to completely stop living my life because of this tiny little microscopic dot.
Come on, Jimmy.
Are you worse?
I didn't take you for a worse.
I'm very surprised to learn that you are a wuss, as a matter of fact.
Vince, look at what has happened in Italy.
Yeah, well, maybe that's because Italy hasn't been clean since like 4 BC.
This is the United States of America.
We are clean.
I'm looking around at the grove right now.
This is sterile as shit.
I'm feeling extremely patriotic walking around this clean grove.
Vince, do you realize the danger you and others are putting us in by ignoring these guidelines?
Danger?
You want to talk danger?
I'll tell you what the real danger is.
The federal government telling us what to do.
Regular, red-blooded American citizens lying down to the jackbooted thugs of the state trying to run our lives.
Then what's going to stop the spread of the disease then, Vince?
Think about that.
The free market, baby!
How will the free market save us?
I don't know.
I'm not an economist, but I know that that's always the solution, no matter what.
This is what we believe.
And we can't have a free market without an economy, so people need to go out and do things and buy shit, like after 9-11.
But the virus is...
God damn it, Jimmy.
Why won't you listen?
If everyone just buys shit, then the invisible hand of the free market will wash itself for a long enough time.
I don't know where this analogy goes.
But the free market is always the solution.
The government is always the enemy, and I simply refuse to think about this or anything else any further or engage in any reflection whatsoever about anything.
Do I make myself clear?
Yes, crystal clear, Vince.
Okay, good.
Well, look, I gotta let you know.
I'm about to head over to the Santa Monica Peter, and I like to watch videos on my phone while I drive.
You can't tell me what to do!
*laughter*
It's a big deal to be able to report on COVID on YouTube, right?
Because we have to pass a special test and things like that.
And so we're on a special list of new shows who are allowed to report on COVID on YouTube.
That's correct, right, Steph?
I'm not exaggerating this.
This is true, right?
Ruby?
This is true.
According to our team.
It's according to my team that we're on some kind of a list, a whitelist or whatever.
And so we've been approved to be able to be monetized when we talk about COVID, even though that's not always the case.
So anyway, and you're not allowed to say anything that doesn't go, you know, if you, if I link to a study or something that's not like verified or something, that's not okay as far as YouTube goes.
So it's only like CDC guidance and it's got to come from the government and all that stuff.
Well, what happens when the government's lying?
Because as I have said here before, the government is the biggest purveyor of fake news next to the mainstream news media.
Those are the two biggest purveyors of fake news.
So should I really give all this?
I should uncritically take what the CDC says.
I should uncritically take what Fauci says.
That's what I've been told.
And if you don't do that, if you don't uncritically take what they say, you're some kind of a crazy and you're reckless and you're a nut and you're some kind of a and so that's what right and you're you're you're they'll call you every bad name in the book like what they used to call us when we were getting rushagate right those names they'll make you they'll call you like the people pushing a conspiracy called the people debunking the russia gate conspiracy they called them conspiracy theorists i saw with my own eyes
hurt it with my own errors uh so that's what they'll do to you so here the and the reason why am i bringing this up because i went on the rolling stone podcast useful idiots and i was like well we don't know what the real what's the real numbers what's the real things what's the real story about covid how contagious is it how many people real what are the real numbers that's what that's you know because some you see these reports that they're being told to over report the
deaths then you hear stories that they're under reporting the deaths that people are being buried without being tested and of course you don't know because so you so i'm like where can we ever trust the information and they're like well you can't how dare you ever not believe this guy well turns out this guy is lying was lying to us about the masks so do you
remember when masks when they're like yeah masks don't really save you they want they're not going to help you but you know you could wear one because then then you won't infect someone else it'll keep that but then you heard reports that well if you do wear that it'll make it worse for you to wear it's actually so you couldn't and a regular person doesn't know which way to turn so they turn to this guy and it turns out this guy he was lying he was still i'm going to play it for you what he said here's what he says because
they were first telling people that masks don't help you well now the evidence is in that the countries who wore masks it did help them and here's what he says to your first question which was what about months or so or two or three ago when people were saying you don't really need to wear a mask well the reason for that is that we were concerned the public health community and many people were saying this were concerned that it was at a time when personal protective equipment including the
n95 masks and the surgical masks were in very short supply and we wanted to make sure that the people namely the health care workers who were brave enough to put themselves in a harm ways to take care of people who you know were infected with the coronavirus and the danger of them getting infected we did not want them to be without the equipment that they needed so there was not enthusiasm about going out and
everybody buying a mask or getting a mask we were afraid that that would deter away from the people who really needed it so what he's telling you is that he's a liar and that he lied to americans about the coronavirus on purpose so that you would be less safe from it
because he had what he believed was a higher purpose which was to endanger your life and give you false information so that he could save someone else's life and
lying to you was the way he could facilitate that so now you'll never have confidence in the government when they tell you or him I'll never believe another goddamn thing that guy says will you and if you do now who's a sucker I'm gonna have to double check everything that guy says and triple check and so we're not allowed to disagree with this guy on youtube we're not allowed to disagree with them that's
illegal on youtube so do you understand why no one in the world ever should
tell you what fake news is there is no organization or board or group of journalists no one should ever get to tell you what is real and what is not and who should be allowed to talk and who shouldn't be allowed to talk and what questions are out of bounds there are people who I questioned the science on this and there are people who made videos about me doing that how many
times do you need to be lied to by the fucking government before you stop stop criticizing other journalists who are skeptical of the goddamn government why would you watch a news show that isn't skeptical of the government go watch Chris Hayes go watch Anderson Cooper those are your shows they're never skeptical when they're supposed to be so
now this guy's a liar and he's admitting it and he doesn't seem upset at all yeah
well we decided to lie to everybody because we didn't want people you know going out and trying to protect themselves so we lied to them so now when people are out at Ralph's they're not wearing a mask at the beginning of this when they should have been they're like no they said it doesn't help and they're taking advertising away from certain news places that because they don't tell the truth about certain
things do you understand why you can't play the game of who gets to be a news person who gets to publish do you understand why you can't do that why you shouldn't do that do you understand why there shouldn't be a certain class of journalists that are okay to tell certain stories that come from okayed sources understand that's the whole point of journalism is to
question sources that's the whole point of it not to just relay confirmed bullshit by the government or anybody else no one has a monopoly on the truth truth i wouldn't have been allowed to publish during the run up to the Iraq war telling you that was all fake and the government's lying and the New York Times is lying and Washington Post is lying and CNN is lying.
I would have got the platformed.
They would have taken our Google AdSense away.
This guy's lying.
Do you understand why you can't have anyone decide what's the truth and what's not in a free society that now we're in a living in an age where journalists are afraid to ask basic questions?
Everyone should be questioning everybody.
Everyone should be questioning the science on the coronavirus because we don't know what the fuck it is.
And fuck this whole idea of, oh my God, you asked a bad question.
Now they should be shamed.
They should be canceled.
They should be canceled.
Hillary Clinton lied for an entire day about why she passed out.
She lied 10 different ways about it.
But if anybody questioned why she was lying, you were the one who were told was a fucking conspiracy theorist when it's actually them who are liars.
Why would you ever fucking believe anything this guy says from now on out?
I'll ask you, Steph, what are they saying in the chat?
You know what?
I just was looking at another article, you know, and, you know, there's an article from that talks about, it says, Dr. Fauci, the U.S. trusted voice on the coronavirus.
Right?
You know, you see those kind of titles, and then you see that he's always correcting Donald Trump.
Okay.
You see all that.
And then you see an article that says Dr. Fauci made the corona pandemic worse by lying about masks.
That's right.
And saying that since February, he consistently was going on one press comment after another, saying they're not since February.
Since February and lying.
And so now that has been in part of the dynamic in the United States.
So why wouldn't you push back about why do I need a mask?
And why would any question ever of an article of science ever be shamed after this?
Anything they ever say about science that comes from the CDC or this guy or the fucking government or the what?
This idea that questions are bad.
I hope it ends here.
Four months later, right?
So four months later.
Steph, even after even after Russia Gate, people are still not acknowledging that that what it was.
There's nobody, there's still people who are Russia Gators at the top of their lungs with zero shame, actually criticizing the journalism of people who got it right still to this day.
Still to this day, those people have no fucking shame.
If I was a Russia Gator, I would fucking climb into a hole for five years and meditate on it.
And then before I came out to try to do journalism again, but those fucking cocksuckers have zero shame.
Zero.
Zero.
And you have everybody in the Democratic Party coming forward and saying that any vaccine should be affordable.
And, you know, shame on Donald Trump for doing a poor job about handling this, except we have no solutions for you or your medical costs.
No, future.
All we have is that we can wag our finger at Donald Trump.
That's it.
We have no solutions to make your life better.
Please go out and protest and riot.
How is this not a front page story?
How is this not on the front page?
Hey, government, Fauci's a big liar.
Fauci made the coronavirus epidemic worse.
Number one doctor on coronavirus thinks it's okay to lie to the public about the coronavirus when he feels like it.
What?
I thought Trump was the big liar.
And doesn't it make you also like, I know it's all completely maddening.
It's all just like so cruel.
And the whole time, they continue to explode the military budget.
Yes.
There's no explosion of the budget on behalf of the people.
It's on behalf of bullets and killing and displacing and just the nightmare.
But when it comes to really being able to serve the public, it's one big failure after another.
There's lots of money for every other industry except the people.
No wonder you want to break.
This is crazy.
I mean, what this actually makes me the most angry at is journalism.
journalism.
Thank you.
And because they're not even going to cover this.
I saw Kyle Kalinske cover this as I was coming right before on air.
I watched his coverage of this.
Who else covered this?
Have you seen anyone else cover this?
I don't know.
Let me Google.
Let's see.
Let's see.
Again, it'll be one of those things where they cover it, but like in passing, it'll be a sin by the lack of emphasis.
They'll say, and of course, the government was worried that people would hoard them at beginning.
So they didn't emphasize that it could.
They'll say some weasel words like that.
Let me look.
Let me look.
Fauci lied.
Let's see what comes up if I Google Fauci lied.
The Hill.
Fauci says Americans are ignoring science.
The coronavirus.
That's one day ago.
The Hill.
So four days ago, The Hill did it.
So this is all the Hill.
Why the Public Wasn't Told to Wear Masks When the Coronavirus Pandemic Began.
And then one day, then three days later, he says, Fauci says Americans are ignoring science.
That's what a ball.
Again, again, and Fauci is not embarrassed.
He's not, again, shunned from polite society.
He doesn't have to go into a cave and meditate for five years about why it's not okay to lie to the public during a fucking pandemic.
That's not a problem.
Just like those people who push Russia Gate at the top of their lungs don't have a problem.
They still do the news.
They still do the news, every fucking one of them.
And they don't start every sentence with an apology.
No one's ever apologized to fucking me.
This is amazing.
Business insider, Fauci, mask advice was because of doctor shortages from the start.
So that's, I got the business insider and the hill.
Let's see what else.
Gizmodo, Gizmodo has it.
Let's see.
Washington Examiner has it, but it's weird.
I don't see NBC News, New York Times, Washington Post.
And so here's the National Geographic.
Here's a headline from the National Geographic.
It says, no scientific evidence the coronavirus was made in a Chinese lab, says Fauci.
Well, now, how do I fucking know that's true?
I bet he's lying.
How do you know he's not lying about that?
How do you know that Fauci doesn't know for sure the opposite is true?
He might know the opposite.
I can't believe him.
The evidence is that Fauci's probably lying about this.
The evidence is that he's been the director of the U.S. National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases for 40 years.
And after 40 years, he thinks at the beginning of a pandemic, the best thing to do is to lie to the American public about what would best keep them safe.
Okay.
So no major news or none.
No.
So, I mean, unless you consider the Hill and Business Insider to be big, they're definitely corporate news, but they're definitely not.
I wouldn't consider them huge outlets.
The Washington Examiner, same thing.
That's actually right-wing.
So let's see what.
Let's see what the YouTube show, Joe Rogan.
So Joe Rogan covered this.
Are you shitting me?
Promoting face masks because it knew shortages were so bad that even doctors couldn't get enough.
So is he just saying that now?
This morning or today?
So guess what?
You all, every we all got lied to.
We all got lied to held off on promoting face masks because it knew shortages were so bad.
But then doctors couldn't get enough.
Recently, the CDC said the only people that should be wearing masks are people that are treating COVID patients and that regular people shouldn't be wearing masks.
And then the World Health Organization said that asymptomatic people, it's extremely rare that they transmit to other people.
So we were worried about asymptomatic people, which is the reason why we kept kids out of school.
And we were worried about overwhelming the hospitals, which is why we did all this other stuff as well.
Which is what droves me crazy about my kids' school.
I was like, hey, you fucks, this doesn't even kill the kids.
It's killing the kids get killed by the flu.
Meanwhile, you don't even scan the teachers or the staff or anybody.
People have the flu.
They don't want to miss a day of work.
They just fucking show up and give it to everybody.
That's normal.
And kids actually die from the flu.
And it's not a small number.
It's not a small number of people that die from the flu.
Last year was 62,000.
I mean, it's not as many as COVID.
But then you're hearing, you're hearing two camps.
You're hearing one, the COVID deaths are actually underreported because a lot of people die from COVID and they don't even register it.
Okay.
Boy, I guess it's worse than this.
And then you're hearing, no, no, no.
Actually, we're getting incentivized to report deaths as COVID.
Elon Musk on the podcast.
So this is exactly.
So now we don't know who to believe.
I'll tell you what, I bet your America trusts Joe Rogan more than they trust this guy right now.
Joe Rogan's not going to lie to you about fucking COVID on purpose.
Like this guy.
Can you imagine Joe Rogan lying to you about, I don't know, mixed martial arts for whatever reason, like for a month or two, just like, yeah, it's you can't die from that certain hold.
That's okay.
It's all to do that.
I've known it.
And then it's like, yeah, I knew that was a lie, but I did it because we needed ratings or something.
I don't know.
It's a fucking nut.
What the fuck?
Do you see what happens when you erode the trust in our institutions?
Now nobody knows what the fuck to believe at any turn at any time.
They said George, they said George Floyd didn't die from being kneeled on for eight and a half minutes.
That's what the original corner's report said.
We live in a hundred percent criminal, corrupt government society, being lied to by every turn.
Even this guy, that's the guy people felt sorry for because he had to work with Trump and Trump is such a liar.
That guy's the goddamn doctor, the head of it for 40 freaking years.
How about how I just said years?
That was pretty wild how I said it.
Years.
40 freaking years.
Oh my God, is that Harrison Ford calling me?
Hello?
I know.
Yes.
What?
You can say that again.
And furthermore, how did you get this number?
No, I didn't.
You called me, Harrison.
You don't have to be so formal.
Just call me Harrison.
What's happening, Harrison?
What is that supposed to mean?
I'm glad you called.
I have some important information regarding what's going on now with the thing, you know, the stuff going down and all.
Where are you?
I don't know, but it looks an awful lot like my kitchen.
As a matter of fact, I think it is my kitchen.
I guess there's only one way of finding out.
Hey, are you my kitchen?
Is it your kitchen?
Damn kitchen.
Get out of there.
My kitchen out.
What?
You said you had some important tips regarding the coronavirus.
Do you have any?
Yes, first of all, it's one word, not two, okay?
Coronavirus.
One word, understand?
The sooner we all understand that, the sooner we can get through this.
Okay, all right.
Thirdly, and C, be vigilant.
For instance, since this whole thing started, I've been soaking my joints in rubbing alcohol.
Smoking pot and rubbing alcohol sounds dangerous.
Talking about my hips.
I'm 77 years old.
And thirdly, sanitize your flaps.
You can't fly with dirty flaps.
Check your damn flaps.
Do a flap check and sanitize them.
And fourthly, when washing your hands, do the five-second rule.
No, no.
What?
What's the five-second rule?
That's where you look at your hands for five seconds and say, who's that joining in?
Wait.
There's my hands.
There's the soap.
There's the water.
Oh, well, five seconds are up.
Time eight.
Well, what if you don't have any soap because people have been hoarding?
Good question.
I found from personal experience: if you run out of soap, you can always make do with industrial-grade jet fuel.
And what if you don't have jet full lying around because you don't own a bunch of airplanes?
Good question.
And it's time to open up your panic room.
Now, if you're like me, your panic room is in a remote area of northern Montana, encased in a concrete bunker.
You'll need a helicopter to get there.
Be sure you got that ready.
Alert your flight team.
I don't think any of these suggestions are very helpful, Harrison.
I got to be honest with you, Pell.
You're just upset right now because I'm sounding surprisingly lucid.
It's just that many of your suggestions just aren't practical to most people.
I understand that.
And that is why, for those who can't escape to their concrete panic rooms in the Arctic, I suggest hovering in place.
Get in your bell 206 Long Ranger helicopter and hover in place.
Pilot the tower.
Pilot the tower.
I can't find my car keys.
Please advise.
Hey, you know, we no longer have an Amazon link because we're not doing that.
We're not playing that game.
But here's another great way you can help support the show: you become a premium member.
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And it's a great way to help put your thumb back in the eye of the bastards.
Thanks for everybody who was already a premium member.
And if you haven't, you're missing out.
We give you lots of bonus content.
Thanks for your support.
Man, I'm getting a call here from a number I don't recognize.
Hello, this is Jimmy.
Who's this?
Hey there, little brother.
This is David Lee Roth calling your ass.
Excuse me.
Now, I know you're probably thinking, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Why am I getting a call from American vocalist DR?
Well, as one entertainer turned podcaster/slash YouTube phenomenon to another, I just wanted to reach out in a spirit of respect and honor to you, specifically, considering what you've been able to build in your little garage out there in Pasadena, my hometown, which makes it all so much sweeter.
Hometown love never dies, and extend an open hand of respect that in ancient Japanese culture is known as Tatsuya Suki, which is something I just made up right now because I speak compulsively.
Well, let me get this straight.
I'm talking to David Lee Roth from Van Halen.
Yes, Van Halen is one of several sources your listeners may know me from, but let's not forget, lest we be remiss, my solo career, my solo albums, crazy from the heat, number one, many weeks, as well as possibly younger people know it'd be best for my work with the New York Paramedic Association.
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
I'm kind of what you call a polymath.
But now I am, like you, a YouTube guy.
30k subscribes.
That's a good start.
It is, I agree, but it's no 616K, Mr. Door.
Let me know when you get to 666, right?
Run and win the demo.
Okay.
Okay, I will do, Mr. Lee Roth.
Please call me Diamond Dave.
Just kidding.
But maybe not.
Who knows?
Yeah, so I need to get these numbers up.
Okay.
And it seems to me, from what I've seen, the best way to do that is to go leapfrogging around YouTube.
Guest on this show, get more subscribes.
Guest on that show, get even more subscribes.
That's kind of how you did it, right?
Maybe to a certain extent.
That's certainly an element of it.
So, yeah, I've been on Mark Maron in his garage.
I did Joe Rogan.
Got that sweet Rogan bump.
You did Joe's show.
I bet you got a sweet Rogan bump.
Yes, I did.
That is true.
I got a Rogan bump.
So what I'm saying is that I am looking for that sweet, sweet door bump.
But don't worry, I'm not talking about the door bump that we used to do when Van Halen was on tour Sabbath at 79 on the Never Say Die tour.
It's the most dangerous bump there is because we do it right off the doorknob.
And you never know when some maniac was going to come crashing through the door.
Look, you know, I don't.
I probably should tell Tales out of school, but Geezer Butler broke his nose twice on that tour.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
Look, David Lee Roth, with all due respect, this is primarily a political podcast.
We usually have journalists and the like as guests.
Hey, man, David Lee Roth is politics, and politics is David Lee Roth.
That makes literally no sense.
Yeah, but nude is seeming to bomb a dude ship, but it may be a million dollars after taxes.
See, this is the type of stuff we can rap about in person when I'm on your show.
Well, look, Dave, in addition to the fact that you are neither a journalist nor a politician, we'd like to kind of stay focused on topic during our segments.
You seem kind of all over the map.
I mean, I'm sorry, but no, I mean, I hope you're not too bummed out.
Ah, come on, man.
Are you kidding?
Of course I'm bummed out.
I'm as bummed out as Sammy Hagar at DWI Checkpoint.
I'm as bummed out as Elvis Costello at a dick measuring contest.
But you know what?
I'll get over it.
It was, yeah, it was good catching up, my friend.
Well, glad to see you're keeping your sense of humor.
Always, Jimmy, always.
Hey, speak it up.
If I can't sit in with you and Stephen the gang, maybe I can keep calling in.
Maybe.
We'll see.
We'll see how this video does on YouTube.
Breaking the fourth wall, babe.
I love it.
Woo!
So now Trump hates Bolton now, even though he hired him, hates, even though Bolton was the quintessential swamp guy and Trump hired him.
And yet he still has support of his base.
Anyway, so he hates him.
And so you tweeted this out.
And because Trump tried to get his book suppressed, you tweeted this out.
You said, John Bolton, a notoriously mendacious enemy of all living beings on the planet, is discovering what every other great Republican hope of the resistance has.
Liberals will eagerly lap up any piece of hysterical Cold War propaganda if they think it can be leveraged against Trump.
So you tweeted that out.
You also said Trump is 100% right that Bolton wanted to start World War IV.
So your brain must be 80% bong water to campaign against the neocons, then hire Bolton along with Genocide Abrams, Jabba Pompeo, and every FDD Lakudnik that Uncle Sheldon orders you to appoint.
Trump Drowned in the Swamp.
That's a great, that's a very great tweet.
We could teach a course on that tweet.
But what's most interesting about that tweet is that Trump retweeted it.
So Trump retweets that, and then you start to change your profile name.
I don't know how you do that on Twitter, but so you then changed your Twitter name to Prosecute Pompeo at the International Criminal Court.
And so that's on Trump's timeline.
And that's hilarious.
Then you changed the name again.
You changed it to Free Gaza, Fire Jared.
And that's on Trump's timeline.
and you had a couple other ones.
You had U.S. sanctions kill kids.
You had that one.
You also had defund the police, right?
And so then Trump had to unretweet that.
That's what happened, right?
Yeah, somebody, you know, Jared ran in the room with Ivanka.
I'm like, Donald, Dad, unretweet this.
Get him out of there.
Get this anti-semite self-hating juke out of there.
So that was, that's kind of a big win for you, is it?
That's got to be, goddamn.
If you weren't, oh, if you weren't already married, you could get laid off that for sure.
Friend, congratulations.
Tip of the hat.
That was really nice.
I mean, you know, I appreciate it.
I was just trying to make the most I could out of the situation.
It was a really, it's one.
I mean, basically, I tend to tweet late at night because I try to do productive things during the day.
And I wake up, and when I wake up, I'm like bracing myself for what catastrophe me being online created.
I'm like, what hell am I going to wake up to?
That's unbelievable that you woke.
Then you woke up to him retweeting you?
Is that what happened?
I had a really good sleep, and Anya, my wife, who works with me at the Gray Zone, woke me up and said, she'd been up before and she said, Max, wake up.
You're in the middle of an international incident.
I'm like, what?
So, so yeah, and I had all those, you know, neocon and State Department leftist types claiming that I was in the middle of a brown-red alliance.
Like, I had gone and told Trump, like, hey, Donald, tweet this out, and we'll take out Bolton together.
But, you know, then I realized if I, I mean, it was actually Aaron Matte's idea.
I got to give Aaron props here.
He said, you know, you could change your name and it would show up on Trump's timeline.
And I was like, this could actually be more fun than I thought.
So I went with it and it stayed up.
I mean, I was changing my name left and right.
I had all these ideas I never got to make good on.
It stayed on its timeline for eight hours.
And I really want to know, like, maybe, you know, one of these, you know, Times journalists who has sources in the White House can find out how I got unretweeted because, I mean, there were like 12 articles written about Trump retweeting me.
It was like the news of the day for several hours, which is bizarre in itself.
That's, I mean, it's a juicy story.
It's fantastic.
It's a great story.
I mean, this is what the Trump era has given us, you know, and you've got to make the most of it.
Yes.
It's completely hacked the consensus and turned politics upside down.
And I felt very satisfied after being able to get those messages across on the president's timeline to say, fund the police on the timeline of the president of the United States.
I mean, for someone like me who like basically wouldn't exist if the internet disappeared, it was very satisfying.
Yes, that's that's kind of that's ah, you could I could die now if that happened to me.
That would be great.
That would be you're on the law and order president's timeline, defund the police.
Fucking awesome.
And I don't know where you are, but I've got my eye on that split-level duckless air conditioning system over your right shoulder.
That's a sweet little system there.
I'm in Bolivar, West Virginia.
It's named for Simon Bolivar, the great liberator of South America.
And it's next to Harper's Ferry, where John Brown launched a slave rebellion and basically helped start the Civil War.
In 1906, in Harper's Ferry, W.E.B. Dubois launched the civil rights movement with a pilgrimage, walking barefoot to the site where John Brown launched his slave rebellion.
And I'm at the home of some really nice people who were so excited when I told them that I had to break away from dinner to go on Jimmy Doerr's live stream.
You have a lot of fans out here, and it's really amazing.
Well, first tip of the hat to them for their nice air conditioning work.
Tell them I noticed.
And also, so you're, and you're not a tour guide?
I'm a tourist.
You're just a tourist.
That's amazing, right?
Because I was getting ready to ask questions.
And, you know, is there going to be a bathroom break on the tour?
But no, it was just, anyway.
No, that's amazing.
I used to go on lots of tours when I was a kid.
Park Rangers and things like that.
And I remember going to Arlington Cemetery as a kid and fighting the Gnats.
Most of the time I was there.
The Gnats.
Fucking Gnats.
My grandfather's buried there in a little box.
His ashes are there in a little box.
He flew scores of missions over North Africa.
He was the tailgunner in a B-19.
He wasn't a big fan of war after that.
Wasn't someone who came back and talked about being in the greatest generation after killing people he didn't know.
But he's buried there.
I got to see a real military ceremony.
But he didn't get killed in the war.
No, he lived.
He actually lived because he had a, as the story went, he had a dentist's appointment.
And so he had some major kind of mouth infection.
And so he didn't fly one day.
And his crew, who had became like his brothers, I mean, they had flown possibly more missions than any other plane in the North African theater was killed, was destroyed.
So they all died.
So his nickname became Lucky Tooth.
He flew three more missions with a new crew and hated war.
And I, you know, trying to carry on that tradition.
So, boy, talk about your survivor guilt.
Jesus.
So, but when people, yeah.
So if you don't get, even if you don't get killed in the war, if you die and you start, they bury you in Arlington Cemetery.
You have the option of that burial.
And I don't think that's right.
You don't think that's right.
No.
No, I just, that glorifies war too much.
Like, if you get killed in the war, okay.
I think you should be buried in Arlington Cemetery.
If you die after the war from non-war injuries or whatever, or natural causes, I just think that's that's, I mean, I'm not saying they, I'm not saying they, I'm just saying as a theory.
I think I never thought about it.
You know, the main section I visit when I go there is, I think, section 106, and that's where the Iraq war casualties are buried.
Oh, okay.
Just because, you know, those are, you know, men and women of my generation who were killed in vain for George W. Bush, who's now in his George W. Bush's war for re-election and empire, and he's now being rehabilitated.
I think, you know, if Biden hadn't pledged to pick a female prosecutor as vice president, he could have done a unity ticket with Bush.
He didn't, by the way, he gave Bush a medal.
Oh, that's right.
Joe Biden gave George Bush a medal.
Right.
So, I mean, it's worse than that even.
Trump tweeted this out.
Big court win against Bolton.
Obviously, with the book already given out and leaked to many people and the media, nothing the highly respected judge could have done about.
So he's trying to spin this as a positive.
Of course, you can't win them all and whatever.
He says, but strong and powerful statements and rulings on money and breaking classification were made.
Bolton broke the law and has been called out and rebuked for doing so with a really big price to pay.
He likes dropping bombs on people and killing them.
Now he will have bombs dropped on him.
Dude, you hired that guy to go drop bombs on people and kill them.
That's fucking hilarious.
So what he's first, what he's referring to is that the judge said that Trump, for some reason, and I don't know if you know the reason, can, or the government can now sue him for the money from that book.
Is that true?
I think he's saying he's going to drone bomb him, but as the Israelis said of the Iran-Iraq war, this is a blessed war between Trump and Bolton.
Yes, this is a blessed war.
So there's something, I wish I had more of the details, but there is something that's uplaw there.
So here is Steve Inskeep from NPR.
I'm Steve Inskeep from NPR.
Bolton has sharp criticisms for many in the administration and faces much criticisms himself.
There is so much more to discuss, exclamation point, but his portrayal of the president is relentless in length and detail.
Okay.
Jonathan Turley, he says, rather than testify to impeachment, Bolton hawked his book and then later violated his non-disclosure agreement to sell it.
That is why Lambert should refuse the injunction.
Everyone will get exactly what is coming to them.
Bolton gets his book.
Critics get another embarrassing Trump account.
Trump seizes Bolton's profits.
Trump can even joke that he found the only thing better than having Mexico pay for a border wall, having liberals pay for it, albeit indirectly, via Bolton's payments to the Treasury.
And Lambert's court could be the room where it happened.
So what I think happened is because he's violating his NDA, that they can get the profits for that book goes to the government, and then indirectly that money could go to the border wall.
So that's kind of Jonathan Turley found a nice little groove there for that.
So that's kind of interesting.
Much more interesting than the NPR guy.
That's like, why would you fuck my point of this?
Why would you bother?
Why would you bother to tweet this?
Because you're an NPR.
You're Steve Inskeep from NPR.
There's so much more to discuss.
And now we're off to a quaint saltwater taffy factory in New England.
Do, do, do, do, do, do.
Yeah.
Anyway.
NPR is such a joke.
Oh, man.
They're such a joke.
They're so pretty.
It's like they're playing house, like they're playing journalists.
It's so funny.
It's more propagandistic than I've ever heard it in my life.
It's unbelievable.
After the saltwater taffy factory, then we will Nicholas Maduro's concentration camps.
And then Russian sympathizer Glenn Greenwald tells us why Russia Gate isn't true.
Right.
And why, and we'll hear from some neocon on why Glenn Greenwald is insane.
But back to Turley, who I, if I'm not incorrect, he supported Trump's election.
But he's a legal expert.
He knows what he's talking about.
So I'm sure there is a way for Trump to seize Bolton's profits.
But I think that he didn't go far enough.
I think what would be fair is if Bolton gets to have his moment in the resistance sun, then Trump seizes Bolton's profits.
That Trump then gets sued by, along with Trump and the U.S. Park Police, gets sued by all of the people, all of the protesters outside the White House who Trump used chemical weapons on, and John Bolton's profits go to them after Trump used chemical weapons on his own people.
I think that would be fair.
I think that would be fair.
I don't think Jonathan Turley was a Trump voter.
I could be completely wrong, and I apologize to Jonathan Turley if I'm wrong.
But I remember him being, I remember him being sympathetic to Trump.
So, no, when he testified at the impeachment, and he was sympathetic to Trump's case, but I think he said that I'm not a Trump supporter.
I could be wrong about that, too.
Whatever.
Yeah, it doesn't matter for the point he's making, who he supports, who he doesn't.
Whatever.
At least he didn't go to pedophile island like Dershowitz.
No kidding.
So Barb McQuaid says this is just about the best outcome.
Court won't block Bolton's book from publication, but Bolton will likely lose his profits in the end.
There is still some justice in the world.
Should have just testified at an impeachment inquiry.
So there you go.
Here's Joe Biden.
He says, if John Bolton's accounts are true, it's not only morally repugnant, it's a violation of Donald Trump's sacred duty to the American people.
God damn it, motherfucker.
God damn, they just can't fucking help themselves with their bullshit.
They just won't sacred duty.
Truth has to mean, defend our values.
Joe Biden has about as much values as John Gotti.
He has absolutely, I bet you gotta have more values actually than Joe Biden.
What kind of a value does a guy like Joe Biden, who bombed Libya, turned into a failed state, then kept going into Syria, kicked everybody out of their house during a recession, did the crime bill, made it harder for poor people to get rid of their debt when they were sick and bankruptcy.
The guy's a he's worse than John Gotti.
He certainly murdered more people.
So I don't know.
There you go.
Well, you know, to Biden's credit, he didn't tweet that.
He doesn't know what Twitter is.
He probably doesn't type, have the ability to type.
But, you know, I think that that tweet might have had more credibility if Joe Biden, when asked about his son's involvement with burisma, said, my son did absolutely nothing wrong.
I know.
I mean, you know, it's one thing to say, okay, I didn't fire the prosecutor to protect my son.
There's no evidence there.
But he said, my son did nothing wrong when he was taking $80,000 a month from some oligarch and had no experience in the oil industry at all.
And it was completely so this oligarch could get in with Biden and the Obama administration and polish his reputation in Washington after being this completely corrupt official.
But to Biden, that's doing nothing wrong.
So he really has nothing to say here.
And no one takes him seriously.
And no one is going to vote for him.
Not one person is going to vote for Joe Biden.
People are going to vote against Donald Trump.
That's right.
Because all of those boomers who feel like they're about to get COVID if they leave their bedroom would vote for Herbert Hoover's burial shroud over Donald Trump.
That's the election.
Joe Biden doesn't even matter.
It's like the greatest gift to Joe Biden.
Just stay in your little, you know, PO box in Delaware or wherever you are, and just you'll just sit there and don't say anything and you'll win.
Maybe.
Maybe not.
So could I put the headline on the video?
Trump retweets crazy lefty.
Well, all the other ones say that already.
Oh, really?
You're going to lose Google SEO if you say that because every other article says that.
Oh, I didn't.
They hate me more than Trump.
That's fantastic.
Trump's having his big rally in Tulsa.
And or do you refer to his rally?
Some people are calling it a super spreader event.
Really?
This is from Garrett Hawks.
It's not even noon in Tulsa, and police are arresting a peaceful protester outside.
The real Donald Trump rally.
Breaking Chesky narrating live as police accuse her of trespassing for sitting quietly outside the arena with an I Can't Breathe t-shirt on.
So the woman has an I Can't Breathe t-shirt on.
She actually had a ticket to the event.
She tried to go in, and they wouldn't let her in because she had that t-shirt on.
So she decided to sit down outside peacefully.
And that wasn't cool.
So some additional context: this arrest outside Tulsa's box center.
This woman who introduced herself as a Tulsa resident, Sheila Buck, was allowed inside initially security gate before being told to step aside away from the crowd.
So there she is.
So there she is.
Doesn't look like she's bothering anybody.
There's news people there.
There's lots of people who aren't going into the event are there.
Upon being told she would not be allowed inside due to her I can't breathe t-shirt.
Buck sat down as others filed towards the event.
Tulsa police approached her and started a dialogue.
Cops are approaching her.
There they are.
You want to hear the vital?
Here's the video.
Is this the video yet?
I don't want to hear stuff broken or damaged or anything.
So the cop is coming to talk to her.
Now, apparently, even though she's sitting there not bothering anybody, it's bothering her.
And she has a ticket, the cops are still going to arrest her for trespassing.
How can you be trespassing when you have a ticket to the event?
I don't know, but it doesn't.
Why would you arrest her?
They have nothing else to do.
They have nothing to do.
They have absolutely nothing to do.
She's trespassing.
That's hardly a trespass.
She may be technically on a private property, but it's a, you know, that's like saying, well, she was at the Staples Center.
She's at private properties.
It's like, cut it out.
But that's what they do.
I don't want to get a phone, man.
I'm an uneasy.
Are you going to see the advice?
Are you going to take it?
So here we go.
After telling the Tulsa Police Department she had a right to be there, the police asked Buck, are you going to make us force you out?
Yes, said Buck.
Working on full video, but Buck said this was the first time she was arrested and she came to the rally in an I Can't Breathe t-shirt to send a message.
Yeah, Alex, if you can hear me right now, we are just a few feet away from this and a Tulsa police officer has instructed this woman that if she won't comply, they will remove her for trespassing.
And that's what they're doing right now.
She said they're removing her from this scene, Alex, and we're right behind Tulsa police here.
We're just going to keep moving along with them.
This woman told police just minutes ago, Alex, that she had a ticket.
And then the officer said, just because you have a ticket.
This seems to be one of those instances where the cops are causing trouble.
The cops are causing a scene.
It seems like they're escalating.
The cops are escalating, causing a scene.
She's not bothering anybody.
There's no problem with this lady sitting down.
There's no problem with this lady sitting down.
That's what we're trying to figure out right now, Alex.
They're arresting her.
They're arresting.
It appears they're placing her under arrest right now, Alex.
I've got nothing.
I have tickets to this event.
I'm trying to listen to what she's saying.
No, I'm not arrested.
I'm not the same.
Hey, Morgan, let me check where she was sitting.
Was she in any way impeding access to the event?
Ow!
No, they hurt.
Alex, it did not appear that she was impeding access.
She was wearing an I can't breathe shirt.
We know she was pulled from the crowd as they I love the cops.
They're all having this when they have the short hair contest.
Cops love to have who can have the shortest hair.
It's like the level of who's the bigger asshole.
And the guys with the shortest hair are the biggest assholes.
And to enter this menu, we're going to keep walking down the sidewalk here, away from the main entrance point.
We have several tools.
Like that guy has hair.
He just chooses to shave it so he can look like whatever kind of a fucking moron he likes to look like.
It's a culture, man.
Those are the kind of people attracted to this shit.
That's what he woke up today.
I hope I get to fuck with someone today.
These officers, we know that handcuffs have been placed on the woman right now.
I'm just behind them.
And they asked her beforehand, ma'am, we don't want to take you out by force.
However, if you don't comply with this.
And by the way, this is the majority of cops' work.
If you think cops spend most of their day dealing with criminals, you are wrong.
How many felony arrests does an average cop make in a year?
One.
This is what they spend most of their time doing, fucking with people.
Just so you know.
We're going to have to remove you from this setting right now.
And so, ma'am, if you can hear me, can you tell me what officers told you that you did wrong?
I was trespassing.
And breaking it off.
And they're arrested.
These guys.
This is what you end up doing when you don't pay attention in school.
This is the kind of thing you end up doing for a living when you don't have, you have absolutely no ambition in life.
And you're kind of, you know, you're kind of a moron.
I've never been arrested before in my life.
So they told you that you were trespassing and breaking law.
And I have a ticket.
What did you come here today to do, ma'am?
You had a ticket, right?
Yes.
Yes.
Wouldn't it be funny if one of the cops, I mean, it wouldn't actually be funny.
So don't take me wrong.
But if one of the cops just started beating her, shut up.
Because that's what, you know, that's what they want to do.
And what?
Were you coming here to protest?
They'd probably go home and hit their wife extra hard after this because they couldn't hit her because they were on camera.
President's arrival, are you coming to attend the rally?
Tell me why.
Say with me, Alex.
We're just walking with police officers right now.
Are you from an organized group?
No.
So why did you come today?
Hey, could you have the Car farther away, you fucking assholes.
Why would you have the car?
How far away is your fucking squad car?
Do you have to walk this woman all the way through the other end of town?
Where the fuck is your squad car?
Fucking morons.
They're such fucking morons.
It's gonna work my transport.
And now they have no idea what they were to even go.
Do you see these fucking morons?
Do you see these idiots on parade?
They don't even know where to take her.
They don't even know what to do.
Where's our transport?
These guys are creating a fucking scene.
They're so stupid.
Fucking morons.
Again, I don't know if you know cops, but I do.
I know lots of cops.
And they're nice to me because they fucking know me.
But they're all mouth breathers.
Hey, guys, we can swing back around.
I can't breathe?
No!
They're arresting me for this!
They're saying I curse last!
Who's going to make a look at this?
So, Alex, I don't know if you can hear, but the woman just...
These fucking morons have no eyes.
Three cops for one woman who is doing absolutely nothing.
They have no idea what to fucking do.
Do you see what kind of morons?
Hey, let's give those guys a gun.
These guys are fucking morons!
From the word go!
And that they're saying she was...
And the guys with the biggest emotional problems are the ones who advance in policing.
Look at them.
They don't know where to go.
They're all walking in circles, a bunch of fucking bald-headed, shaved-on-purpose fucking morons.
Passing because she had an I can't breathe shirt on.
She said that was the main reason that she came out here today.
You fucking idiots.
Hey, why don't you get 80 more cops?
You see how many cops it takes for them to walk this woman?
And they're all in bed.
They're in combat.
They're ready for fucking combat.
You fucking ass wipes.
Regarding Buck's ticket to tonight's President of the United States rally, Tulsa PD told her that since it was a private event, her ticket could be revoked.
So there you go.
There you go.
Why don't you just let the woman sit there?
It's fucking noon.
Let people file in.
You don't let her in.
Show's over.
What are you doing?
Well, we're the Tulsa police.
I don't know if you know.
We don't have anything to do.
I don't know if you know why I got this job because I didn't have any other skills.
That's why I'm a cop.
Believe me, if I had a skill, I'd go fucking do something.
I don't have any skills.
That's why I'm a cop.
That's not like I'm a part-time computer genius or I'm fucking great at carpentry.
I decided to stop doing that shit I'm great at and go fuck with women who are doing nothing and look like a moron doing it.
Only those cops could look like that big of a fucking moron.
Hey, if we have to go arrest her, do you think we should have a car nearby to put her in it?
No, let's just walk around with camera crews in our face and look like fucking idiots.
They looked lost.
They were lost.
They were lost.
But that's a metaphor for their entire life.
Now they're going to go to a McDonald's and if the fucking McMuffin doesn't come out fast enough, they're all going to start crying and start shaving their heads even closer.
That's what they do.
How some people cut, cops shave their heads.
That's what they do when they're anxious.
I got to get rid of this hair.
I'm angry at it.
Hair means you're a hippie.
I want to be the opposite.
I don't want to have any hair at all.
I want to look like I'm going through chemo because that's rough and tough.
I want to look tough.
Fucking thumb dicked morons.
And I understand some women like thumb dicks.
So that's actually that's in your business.
It's in your they like uniforms and small dicks.
Some women, that's what I hear.
So it doesn't hurt.
That's what I hear.
I don't know if that's true.
Okay, that was a great story.
Thanks, Tulsa Police.
That was fantastic.
That was great.
I don't recognize this number.
Let's see who this is.
Hello, this is Jimmy.
Who is this?
Hello, Jimmy.
This is Mayor Pete.
Oh, wow.
It's Pete Boogie.
Thanks for calling the show.
How are you?
Jimmy, we are doing fantastic.
And I apologize for waiting so long to reach out to you.
Oh, it's no hard feelings, Mayor Pete, at all.
Division and divisiveness have dominated our political system for too long.
No campaign without a big tent is going to defeat Donald Trump in November.
Yeah, okay.
Yeah, got it.
All right.
These are the values we hold sacred.
Values that, although challenged, the American people refuse to allow them to be swept aside.
Uh-huh.
Okay.
Uh-huh.
Moving forward.
United.
We are all one.
A thing that is so much greater than simply the sum of its parts.
How small we are as individuals, including me and Chaston, when compared with the sheer mass of this song.
Diversity.
Okay, Mayor Pete, you're doing this thing where you talk, but you really don't say anything.
Hey, you know, there's a lot more to that phone call, but we don't have time in today's podcast.
How do you hear the entire phone call?
You got to become a premium member.
Go to JimmyDorkComedy.com.
Sign up.
It's the most affordable premium program in the business.
Today's show was written by Ron Placone, Mark Van Landowitz, Steph Zamorano, Jim Earl, Mike McRae, and Roger Rittenhouse.
All the voices performed today by the one and the only of the inimitable, Mike McRae, who can be found at mikemcray.com.
That's it for this week.
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