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Dec. 5, 2019 - Jimmy Dore Show
01:04:48
20191205_TJDS_20191205_Podcast
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Get ready for an outstanding entertainment program.
The Jimmy Dore Show.
Hey, it's Bernie on the line.
Hey, hello, Bernie.
Listen and listen up quick because you've only said the word hello and I'm already fed up to hear with you.
What did I do?
May I speak, please?
Of course, Bernie.
Go ahead.
I am proud to announce that I've qualified for the main Democratic presidential primary faster with more signatures than any of the other candidates, especially Kamala Harris, who is no longer a candidate, but is still a cop.
Well, congratulations, Bernie.
Please let me finish.
God damn it.
Seriously, are you done?
Sorry.
Yes, I'm done.
I was also just endorsed by Iowa's largest progressive community organization.
And the California Young Democrats, one of the largest caucuses within the California Democratic Party, just overwhelmingly endorsed my candidacy.
Now you may speak, but keep it short and to the point because my hands are about to flap.
I think that's great, Bernie.
All your endorses.
Jesus, will you ever stop talking?
I am very quickly losing my patience with you and others of your ilk.
And I know what you're probably thinking.
What do these young people know?
I'm still going with the racist, hair-sniffing finger-sucker.
No, Bernie, I'm not that person.
The world must cut emissions by 55% to stay under 1.5 degrees of warming.
You think we could do that under a Biden presidency when he's sucking on fingers?
He can't even go every day without sucking a sniffing something.
Do I suck my wife's fingers in public?
I've never seen you suck your wife's fingers in public.
No.
Imagine if I suck my wife's fingers on stage in a campaign rally.
Do it.
Imagine it.
God damn it.
I don't have to.
I get the message.
They'd call me unorientable.
That's what would happen.
Do you know anyone else who could get away with this kind of shit?
Well, I don't understand it either, Bernie.
Hey, look at me.
I'm Joe Biden.
I was proud to have racist friends in the Senate.
I'm a racist, too.
But look at me.
I'm sucking my wife's fingers in public, and I'm eccentric to none of this matters.
We understand your frustration, Bernie.
We really do.
No, Malachi.
At this point, I welcome some Malaki.
How about no bullshit?
I agree with you.
Shut up.
I mean, what if I get the nomination and he intros me at some event and I flap my hand, he decides to suck my fingers?
I'd be ruined.
Zilch.
I know.
I know.
Don't get me wrong.
I have no bias against people who desire to suck fingers.
As a matter of fact, I'm very proud to have just received the endorsement of the Democratic Party's largest caucus of finger suckers, Democratic finger suckers of America.
That's a great get.
Zip it, Kenneth.
We have got to do what every major country in the world has already done, and that is to guarantee health care as a human right, not sniffing and licking hands.
Did I just have to say that?
Next time one of you fucks criticize my hair, picture that finger-sucking thing and try not to fucking hurl.
And by the way, I don't respect Pete Mutig, and Pete is not a friend of mine.
Nice talking with you.
Establishment media sets of farm and spiding so good luck the bullshit they can't afford.
Like momenting this book.
Watch and see as a jack dog comedian speeds and jumps comedium and hits him hit on.
It's the Jimmy Door show.
Hey, everybody, welcome to this week's Jimmy Door show.
We'll see you in Portland, January 11th and 12th, Tempe, February 9th, Sacramento, February 21st, and 22nd.
And San Jose and Miami.
Go to JimmyDoorComedy.com for a link for all those tickets for all our live shows.
Now let's get to the jokes before we get to the joke show.
Hey, did you know Willie Nelson?
He said he's going to give up smoking marijuana.
Did you hear that?
No.
Yeah, 86 years old, and he says he's going to quit smoking pop because he's concerned it might be a gateway to longevity.
Come on.
Hey, sad news for identity politics.
Kamala Harris has officially dropped out of the presidential race.
I blame Russia and the parents of Truan Children.
She dropped.
Did you know she dropped out of the presidential race right after Gavin Newsom endorsed her?
Like right after.
If he was driving to Iowa to campaign for her, he would have not gotten there in time.
And all I'm saying is I plan to reach out to Gavin Newsom with a list of people I want him to endorse.
Am I right?
Hey, I look forward to Kamala's new book on her struggles where she blames everything but her creepy laugh.
Did you hear this week scientists uncovered an 18,000-year-old frozen puppy in Siberia?
So Rachel Maddow spent 20 minutes connecting the dots to blame it on Russia's Paleolithic puppy mills.
Hey, did you hear there was a viral video of British people getting told facts about the American health care system, and their jaws were dropping at how much everything costs.
At one point, the woman says, so basically, if you're poor, you die.
Which also happens to be Pete Budegig's healthcare plan.
Booty care?
That's right.
Collie calls it booty care.
Sure.
Hey, what's coming up on today's show?
You know, we've been out in front on the Syrian gas attacks.
You mean the false reasons to start another war for oil?
Yes.
Well, turns out there's a second whistleblower that debunks the gas attacks.
A Trump-voting Republican city in Florida has its government open a grocery store.
That's right.
Socialists for Trump in Florida.
Plus, Hillary Clinton says Bernie Sanders is being propped up by the Russians.
That's right.
She went from Tulsi to Bernie in the blink of an eye.
Plus, the New York City DNC vice chair endorses Trump over Tulsi Gabbard.
Is that true?
The answer just may surprise you.
Or will it?
Plus, we got phone calls from Hillary supporter Bernie Sanders and Chuck Schumer, plus a lot lot more.
That's today on the Jimmy Dore Show.
One of the big reasons why I put energy into debunking RussiaGate was when you push red baiting, which is what it is, and McCarthyism, which is what it is, you insinuate someone is a traitor.
Well, the old playbook is anybody to the left of a corporation, if you want to get rid of them, you say that they're a communist or they're too far left or they're Russian.
That's what they did.
Oh, the people who are supporting unions, we got to get rid of these.
They're too subversive.
So the reason why RussiaGate was so insidious and such a bad thing for the left to do because it's always red baiting and McCarthyism has traditionally always been used against the left.
And I said, as soon as anybody goes against any of the wars, they're going to be called Russian.
And if you're on the left, you're supposed to be against wars.
But the problem is a lot of people pushing Russia Gate on the left are pro-war too.
They don't say it out loud.
No one says I'm pro-war, but they are.
You know, the people who are criticizing Trump for not bombing more.
That would be someone who says they're on the left, but is actually a right-winger.
So if you were urging Trump to bomb somewhere more, that's not a left-wing position.
That's a right-wing position.
You're a right-y.
You're a fucking right-winger when it comes to foreign policy.
And so people pushing Russia Gate are also right-wingers when it comes to foreign policy.
So they don't give a fuck because they're never going to oppose a war.
But like I said, what happened, as soon as you oppose a war or health care for your own people, they're going to smear you as being Russia if you let this Russia gate stuff catch on.
Well, it did catch on, and now everybody's a Russian who the establishment doesn't like.
Well, I thought it was just Tulsi Gabbard.
Oh, did you?
Well, remember it was Tulsi Gabbard and Jill Stein.
Remember, it was Tulsi Gabbard, Jill Stein.
So anybody who's publicly anti-war and anybody who's to the left of the Democratic Party are Russian.
And now guess what happened?
Hillary Clinton went on Howard Stern.
I guess she hates misogyny so much.
She went on Howard Stern's show.
I guess she hates the mindless exploitation of women so much she went on Howard fucking Stern.
Isn't that amazing?
Howard Stern, his whole thing was he would have lesbians come on and have sex with each other on air.
That was his thing.
And now here's the former first lady sitting there.
Well, if she'll go on Jeffrey Epstein's plane, why wouldn't she go on Howard Stern's show, right?
That makes sense.
Right?
Well, what I'm pointing out is that they're all not that she shouldn't go on Howard Stern's show or that Howard Stern is bad because he did that.
That's not the point.
The point is they're all fucking hypocrites.
That's the point.
And, well, you're going to see.
Why did Ms. Warren go on Howard Stern?
She refused Fox News.
She wouldn't go on Fox News.
But they'll go on Howard Stern.
Well, that's a curious question.
I don't know if she's ever been on it before, but can I give you my impression?
I'm going to do my impression.
Liz Warren, would you go on Howard Stern?
I need Ayana Presley to come in and help.
All right, so here's what she said.
Just lay in bed and say, fuck this.
I'm getting out.
I mean, I am going to go.
First of all, the interviewer says to the former first lady, fuck, during an interview, says, you ever lay in bed and say, fuck this.
You were a single person.
Nor did she say that was my campaign slogan.
I mean, she ran a campaign that Donald Trump was immoral and naughty.
And he said things like, pussy.
Here she is on Howard Stern.
He says, fuck right to her face and she doesn't even blink.
Now, again, I wouldn't make me blink either.
I'm not the person running around saying I'm more moral than someone else.
You know who I feel sorry for?
Is Alyssa Milano's little kid?
He can't watch this now.
Now she can't watch this.
Into full seclusion.
And they're never going to hear from me again.
No, first of all, that would only delight my adversaries.
So I would never do that.
But secondly, I have this.
So she says that she won't go away because that would make her adversaries happy.
No, you coming back into public office, public life, makes your adversaries very happy.
You going away makes them sad because when you attack Tulsi Gabbard, she went up to 6% in the poll.
You're the anti-candidate, right?
So whatever you want, the opposite happens.
If you attack someone, it's good for them.
I like how that's her first go-to, though.
That's her first thing answering the questions.
Like, well, my adversaries, that would make them happy.
I don't want like, like, I just picture her like getting up in the morning and like having a sip of coffee.
Like, what would my enemies think of this?
Yeah.
Is it pissing them off that I'm caffeinated?
Good.
It's like, okay, you're crazy.
That's a very good observation.
You're right.
She doesn't go, well, no, well, it would be bad for the country if I want to go and fuck my adversaries.
That's what she's saying.
Like, literally.
Always.
Always.
That's her go-to.
Unique perspective, some of which we've been talking about too.
I have a unique perspective.
I have a particular understanding of the Russian threat.
And it's not going to only be Russia.
I mean, so you must be laying awake at this point.
I do.
I have a particular understanding of this thing we made up to cover up for our loss.
And now everybody repeats it as Bible.
And that just shows you how strong propaganda works when you have the intelligence community and the media in your pocket.
So you must lay awake at night making more shit up.
Was that going to be his question?
Like, he doesn't lean on her about, you really keep calling everybody Russians?
You're not nuts with this.
But watch what he does.
Worry a lot.
Because you know how the shenanigans are.
I worry a lot.
You've negotiated with them.
You've seen secret intelligence.
I have.
And you know that, you know, there's these guys from Nigeria who phone your home and somehow finagle six grand out of you by doing that.
And they're brilliant at it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I can only imagine what's going on when Vladimir Putin sits there and plans against the United States.
Well, but you know, you can read the indictments against the Russians.
And I, you know, a lot of people didn't pay attention to it, but it's very informative and scary.
It's very informative and scary.
It's not informative, but it is scary because there's no information in it, except there's a lot of propaganda in it to scare you.
The indictments, you mean the indictments of Russians that will never see the inside of a courtroom that was drawn up as complete propaganda?
That's what she's talking about, Ron.
You know what she's talking about.
Yes, but I think she's also pointing out the one thing that's true is that not a lot of people paid attention to it because when did they have an opportunity to?
I mean, MSNBC barely talked about it.
No, they'll go home.
I know, right?
So what about the Russians that were indicted?
Why wasn't there ever a trial?
Why was no one ever charged?
No one ever, nothing but Russia gate, nothing.
Nobody from the, nobody.
What they went to jail for was for things that had nothing to do with it.
Lying to the FBI or whatever.
It had nothing to do with conspiracy with the Russians.
Anyway, so let's keep going.
It's just so nuts.
And then Howard Stern, of course, he's just a DJ, doesn't know anything about what's going on.
He's, oh, really?
And he's rich.
And he's super, super rich.
It's like, he's got the blinders on.
He doesn't know what's actually happening in the world.
The Mueller report?
Yeah, the indictments.
The report itself, I think, is also worth reading.
But if you read the indictments, you know, basically they were like, hey, let's do everything we can to elect Donald Trump.
I mean, those are quotes taken.
Those are words that taken.
And they also said Bernie Sanders, but, you know, that's not for me.
So anybody to the left of the corporation is a Russian.
So do you see what I'm saying?
Now, Howard Stern doesn't get challenged.
Oh, no, Bernie Sanders is Russian too.
He is too, right?
Yeah, everybody is.
Donald Trump is Russian.
Everybody in Donald Trump's cabinet is Russian.
Everybody in his campaign is Russian.
Also, Tulsi Gabbard, a sitting congresswoman who's on the Intelligence Foreign Relations Committee and the Armed Services Committee.
She's also a Russian.
Now Bernie Sanders, a guy who's been in government for, I don't know, 40 years.
He's a sitting senator.
He's one of the leading candidates for the Democratic nominee.
Also Russian.
And Howard Stern goes right along with it.
Like he doesn't go, this sounds nuts to most people.
Why?
Because Howard Stern doesn't, again, he doesn't, the only time he interacts with regular people is when they're doing a service for him.
He's not out hanging.
He's not hanging out with a roofer and a bricklayer after work.
He's hanging out with people like Hillary fucking Clinton.
That's who he, that's Howard Stern hangs out with people in that circle with that kind of cash.
Go ahead.
He just took on the FCC and he won, though.
Because it's like, remember, you know, I used to listen to him when I was a kid and there was like this certain David and Goliath thing because it's like he was taking on the censors.
He's the message.
He's owned by.
Go ahead.
But now he's going to lie.
Like when he went to satellite, it was like something just got lost because he won.
Yeah.
Like the war was over and he won.
Now he's on this platform.
So you've got to paid all this money.
Yes.
And so now you're not offending anybody anymore because the whole thing was it was on the free airwaves and now it's not.
And now people are paying.
So nobody's going to censor you.
So there's the day again, the danger was all gone.
It's all it's very tepid, his show, no, I think.
Anyway, I don't, by the way, I don't watch it.
So that's, I, it's tepid when I see it, which is almost never.
So my in his defense, I shouldn't be critiquing his show because I don't watch it.
Okay.
What?
Do we hate Bernie Sanders?
No, I don't hate anybody.
Bernie could have endorsed you.
He hurt me.
There's no doubt about it.
He hurt me.
But going back to the indictments, because that's what's really.
He hurt me.
He hurt me.
There's no doubt he hurt me.
You mean he ran in a primary?
So again, this is the same thing.
It's not, I was a horrible candidate.
People don't like me.
I bet you could barely stand me right now.
That's not what she's saying.
He did how many events for her?
So how many times did he go out and campaign for her?
And that was hurting her.
He went to like 15 states.
He did like 30-something speeches for her.
More of his supporters voted for her than her supporters voted for Obama.
That's right.
He hurt her.
He hurt her.
So no one ever brings that up.
By the way, and Howard Stern isn't informed enough to bring that up.
He doesn't go, well, wait a minute.
When you ran against Barack Obama, more of your supporters voted for McCain than Bernie Sanders supporters voted for Trump.
In fact, it was double.
Double Hillary supporters voted for McCain and Sarah Palin, and half of that number of Bernie supporters voted for Donald Trump.
So you can't, that's, you're actually twice as bad.
And let's remember, Hillary Clinton wouldn't get out of the primary either.
Remember when they said, why don't you drop out of the primary?
And she said, hey, Bobby Kennedy got killed in June.
Do you remember that?
That's why she was staying in the race because Bobby Kennedy got killed.
Where she suggested the black guy might get shot.
Yeah, remember when she did that?
Yeah, that totally not racist thing she did.
And again, Howard Stern doesn't know that, so he doesn't bring it up because he doesn't know it.
And these are the people she goes on.
And no one brings up anything.
That's why journalism sucks in America.
And you used to go to Howard Stern because he would ask stuff that no one else would ask.
But now he's just as dumb as everybody else is when it comes to any of this stuff.
Not that he ever was more informed than anybody.
It's just.
And that's great against Bush.
And here she is.
Yeah, because they were coming after him.
Yeah.
Yeah, he was great.
If you come after Howard Stern, then he's just like a Republican.
When it affects him personally, he can understand the problem.
Yeah.
But this is about Hillary Clinton.
This is why the left isn't supposed to do Russia Gate because now everybody's a Russian and every guys, Howard Stern goes along with it.
And everybody goes along with it.
Do you see why?
So now if you say you're against the war, you're a Russian.
If you advocate for getting corporate money out or free health care, you're a Russian.
Hey, the ultimate irony, Russia has universal health care.
They have Medicare for all.
That's the irony.
And so that's why I told people when I was at the Young Turks, I tried to explain this to them.
And here it is.
And I don't know if people will acknowledge it, people who pushed Russia Gate, but here it is, exactly as predicted.
Hey, Russagate will help Trump.
They don't give a fuck.
Impeachment will help Trump.
They don't care.
Again, people who claim to oppose Trump are doing everything they can to prop him up.
RussiaGate was a prop up to Trump.
Impeachment is a prop up to Trump.
Calling everybody a Russian instead of taking responsibility.
That's a prop up to Trump.
Unbelievable.
But at least she doesn't go on Tucker Carlson.
So here, here we go.
Let's just keep this going.
You haven't spoken to Bernie about that?
No.
No.
You haven't talked to him?
I don't talk to him.
I mean, we did when he finally endorsed me and all that.
But you're upset with him.
Disappointed.
Disappointed.
Okay.
So, and I hope he doesn't do it again to whoever gets the nomination.
Oh, my God.
Dude, really?
So she's just basically saying, like, he's not going to get it.
He's not going to get it.
He's just, he's just a chaos agent.
He's a chaos agent from Russia.
Bernie's a chaos agent from Russia.
That's enough.
We have to.
Things are very important.
And, you know, people could speculate and have some good reason to speculate about how bad it might be with Trump in the White House.
Now we know.
There's no guesswork.
We know.
And we know that given his personality and his rage against anyone who questions him, Lord knows.
I mean, they'll just call it a Russian, even if you're a congresswoman.
That's how rageful.
Oh, no, that's you.
I'm sorry.
That's not Bernie.
You mean he'll do the most underhanded smear of someone who's a sitting congresswoman who's on the armed services to me right now?
If he gets rageful enough?
They might try to do.
So it's time to retire him.
Time to retire him.
Wow.
Wow.
Does she, if there's anyone who's ever needed a big mirror, whenever they speak?
Hey, this is Jimmy.
Who's this?
I hope you're happy.
What?
Hello?
I hope you're happy.
This is Hillary supporter, by the way.
Yeah, I figured, I figured that out.
Hey, happy about what?
Kamala Harris is dead.
What?
And you murdered her.
What did I do?
You know what you did.
She's not dead, Hillary supporter.
She just dropped out of the race, buddy.
When people are denied their destiny, that's sort of a death.
A metaphorical death, if you will.
And when that is forced on them, that's basically murder.
You should be in fucking jail.
Nobody forced Kamala Harris to run a flimsy campaign or backtrack on Medicare for All or boast about prosecuting poor people and nonviolent offenders.
Oh, please give me a break.
Spare me.
Don't Even and by the way, nice job with your Kamala Harris as a cop trope.
Way to be insanely racist.
Sorry to break it to you, but she called herself California's top cop.
Oh my God.
How many people do I have to explain this to?
Okay.
Take notes if you have to.
Newsflash.
People of color can call themselves things that white people are not allowed to call them.
Cop?
Stop.
You can't say it, you idiot.
That's my point.
And now her one chance of electing a woman of color president is gone.
No, Tulsi Gabbard is still in the race.
Do not say her name to me ever.
She is Hillary's enemy, and therefore she is lower than whale shit to me.
Besides, she doesn't even count as a POC.
She's just from Hawaii or whatever.
Okay.
With Hillary, we would have had our first female president, but with Kamala, a woman of color, America would have had its first queen.
You know, Hillary supporter, when white people use the word queen to describe somebody just because they're black or brown in sort of a pandering way, that's actually racist.
Oh, no, no, you don't.
Nice try, sir.
I'm an ally, so I can say whatever I want.
Yes, queen, queen Kamala, queen.
Get it, girl.
You're the racist one.
Oh, is that so?
You know, you call yourself a comedian, but I've never heard you call Donald Trump orange once.
Yeah, I guess we should look into that.
So who is your candidate now, Hillary supporter?
Oh, it's still Elizabeth Warren.
Wait, Kamala Harris wasn't even your candidate?
No, she was not my candidate, but her candidacy was more important to me than anyone else's.
Does that make sense?
No.
Yeah, well, I wouldn't expect you, of all people, to understand complex non-linear thinking.
Well, by non-linear, you mean nonsense?
How dare you?
You know.
What?
You know what they're saying?
It's not too late for a certain somebody to get in the race.
Oh, God.
Oh, I'm giddy just thinking about it.
Can you imagine, Jimmy?
She's so wonderful.
Yeah, she's dreamy.
Hillary.
The name still gives me goosebumps.
How wonderful would it be if she jumped in and became the nominee?
And lost to Donald Trump a second time?
It would be just like 2016 all over again.
I could be furious and lash out at Bernie Sanders online and call you up and call you a pig.
Ah, such heady days.
Yeah, just like old times.
Something tells me you're going to be hearing a lot from me next year.
Yeah.
Yeah, I look forward to it.
Well, I don't, you racist internet man.
Talking to you is a necessary and disgusting task like cleaning the toilet.
Hillary supporter, you called me.
Don't dictate my reality to me.
Ha ha ha ha.
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We're not playing that game.
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Hello.
Hello, Jimmy Dore.
May I please take a moment of your time to discuss some issues of vital importance to my constituents.
For I am not only master of the Senate, I am also a champion of the fabled Bailey family of Long Island.
As you know, the Baileys are a family of everyday Americans I like to talk about who live in Long Island.
I didn't know that about them.
I didn't know where they lived.
Joe and Eileen have two kids.
Joe just found out he has prostate cancer.
Eileen works in a physician's office.
They're concerned with bread and butter issues, just like you and me, but not really because I made them up 20 years ago to win an election.
You made them up, Chuck?
Pretty weird, right?
As a matter of fact, they're always interested in what's currently happening with the Baileys.
For instance, the Bailey family is very, very concerned about this new Russian face app that just came out.
Why?
Why?
Because the, well, I'll tell you why.
Because the FBI just told them it's a potential counterintelligence threat and therefore a direct danger to the Baileys, who are a meat and potatoes family, just like you and me, Jimmy.
How is a photo editing application a direct threat to an imaginary family?
Because it's competing with Google, Amazon, Facebook, all those other things I'm not at liberty to reveal because they frighten me.
You don't want to piss off billionaires, Jimmy.
Not only do they pay our salary, they also build rockets which could accidentally blow up Martina Guadalupe Bailey's Kinseyera.
Hey, Joe and Eileen have a daughter named Martina Guadalupe.
They had to adopt because they also have a slow son they don't like to talk about.
He's currently undergoing insulin shock therapy for exposing himself at flea markets.
Just like the average American family.
Don't Facebook, Google, Apple, Microsoft, and Amazon collect similar data on Americans.
But they're not of the Slavic race.
I mean, Russians.
There's a difference between oligarchs and oligarchskis, Jimmy.
Joe and Eileen know the difference.
Do you?
Joe and Eileen aren't real.
Tell that to their youngest, Tiny Tim, because his poor parents are struggling to pay their mortgage on that space in my brain that makes things up.
Hang your head in shame, Jimmy Dore.
Shame, shame, shame.
And don't forget to blame the Russians.
Portions of the Jimmy Door show were recorded live at the Sycamore Tavern in West Hollywood.
So this is the vice chair of the Democratic Party in New York.
This is a vice chair.
So exciting.
God, they're exciting to watch.
Chris, real quick before I let you go, do you personally think he would be a good president?
Would you endorse Mayor Bloomberg in this race?
I'm not endorsing anybody in the Democratic primary at this point.
Every single solitary Democrat except for Tulsi Gavard would be a bit...
Oh, yeah, that Tulsi Gabbard is no good.
Yeah, yeah, that's even know who she is.
Everybody's okay.
So that's the power of the military-industrial complex.
Do you see it?
Someone polling at 3-4% who tells the truth about a regime change wars.
And everybody's okay, except for Tulsi Gabbard.
Gabbard.
Yeah.
Well, I mean, or how about Bernie Sundars?
Joe Biden is really excited.
She probably gets Buttigieg right, though.
So the...
Ah!
Ah!
Ah.
So, yeah, so anybody except, and she doesn't say why.
She just says.
Well, she's just a whole different situation.
But basically.
She actually tells the truth about foreign policy.
We can't allow that.
Yeah.
Anyone running for president in the Democratic primary right now would far surpass Donald Trump.
There's no question.
And you, I mean, you worked with this.
So she would vote for Donald Trump over Tulsi Gabbard.
Right?
That's what I'm too.
That's what she's insinuating, right?
Anybody except Tulsi, that's what she said.
So I guess she's a Trump voter, too.
She's just like Donny Deutsch.
Donnie Deutsch is going to vote.
And everybody at fucking MSNBC is going to vote for Trump.
All right.
Well, you work with.
Would he be a good president?
You think he could do it?
You know, I think that's a big question.
He had a lot of pluses as mayor, and I was, you know, lucky to be.
Yeah, that's a big question.
It's an actual question.
Do you have a fucking answer?
No, she doesn't.
She just beats around the bush the whole time.
Work with him on those, but he had minuses.
I know he's already addressing those in a full-throated way, like stop and frisk.
But it's an apology at this point when you're running for president enough.
And it's a question of how does he stack up in the field?
Not just in what he did as mayor, but his experience compared to other candidates.
Interesting answer, Christine.
Interesting answer, which means he didn't really answer my question at all.
It's amazing.
She goes, well, there's a lot of pluses and minuses with Michael Bloomberg.
Only can come up with minuses, though.
Did you notice that?
She only had minuses.
No pluses.
No pluses.
She looks like she's falling asleep.
It's really like she got woken up and she's like, oh, yeah, Bloomberg's got a lot of stuff that are good and bad for voting.
So Gabbard is not there, though.
You mean Michael Bloomberg?
Michael Blomberg and Myrna Sundars and Andrew Yaang.
She just beat around the bush so much, she beat John.
Fuck that job.
Come on.
See it all.
Christine Quinn just beat around the bush so much she found Sean Spicer.
Oh, crowd was like that.
So I know if you watch this show, you know that we've been ridiculed and criticized for telling the truth and being skeptical of the claims that Assad gassed his own people in Syria, right?
And so this is how it usually goes.
Trump announced he's going to withdraw from Syria.
Then, oh, there's a chemical attack in Syria.
Oh, my God.
And they all report it, right?
So the New York Times, there's a chemical attack.
This is what we know.
Okay.
And then CNN goes there, right?
CNN sends a crack reporter.
I'm sorry, a reporter on crack over to Syria.
And this is how she can tell if there's sarin gas on that backpack.
There's definitely something that stings.
That's her going, oh, yeah, that's just definitely, oh, I'm going to be.
So that is proof positive.
She doesn't think there's anything on that backpack.
Because if she thought there was a chemical weapon on that backpack, the last thing she would do was put it in her face and fucking sniff it.
Okay?
Yeah.
Jimmy, I'm sorry.
I think this might be, there might be poison in this water right here.
Let me just check it out real quick.
Yep, that's fucking poison.
That's chemical weapons right there, Jimmy.
Gun dealers, there's definitely something.
Oh my god.
There's definitely something.
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
I think I smell.
Oh, that's a false flag.
That's what that is.
It smells like a false flag.
There's some bullshit.
I definitely smell bullshit.
So that's how it goes.
So the media covers, they push it.
So it's an obvious bullshit lie.
That's the kind of reporting they do at CNN.
And they write an article criticizing my coverage of Syria.
And I got it right.
And they got someone who's actually there.
They get 100% wrong.
So here's the guy who used to be the head of the British military.
And here's what they did to him.
So he starts to ask an obvious question.
Wait a minute.
Assad is winning the war.
This doesn't make sense that he would do this.
And watch what they do.
Heard from either Sergei Lavrov or indeed the Russian ambassador has made it more difficult for the UK to launch any kind of attack without putting it to parliament.
So now this guy's been waiting for a while to be interviewed.
They've finally come to him.
They ask the question and watch what happens.
Yeah, I think quite apart from all that, the debate that seems to be missing from this is, and this was actually mentioned by the ambassador, was what possible motive might have triggered Syria to launch a chemical attack at this time in this place.
You know, the Syrians are winning.
Don't take my word for it.
Take the American military's word.
General Vogel, the head of CENTCOM, he said to Congress the other day, America, Assad has won this war and we need to face that.
So then you got last week the statement by Trump or a tweet by Trump that America had finished with ISO and we were going to pull out sued very soon.
And then suddenly you go.
Okay, I'm very sorry.
You've been very patiently waiting for us, but we do need to leave it there.
I'm very sorry.
Oh, I'm very sorry.
I just, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm not a real journalist.
Sorry.
Oh, we've got to cut away to some commercials from Raytheon and Boeing.
We need to cut right away.
So, and then the New York Times, they go, oh, one building, one bomb, how Assad gassed his own people.
And they did a whole thing on it.
So this says, how we created a virtual crime scene to investigate Syria's chemical attack.
Our investigation found that Syrian government dropped a chlorine bomb on this apartment in Syria.
See the evidence in augmented reality.
You know why they call it augmented reality?
Because it didn't happen.
That's why they call it augmented at the New York Times.
They just made it up.
They're augmented reality.
They just made it up.
They go, we were unable to visit DOMA.
They were unable to go to the place, but they're going to tell you for sure what happened there.
They go, but to get to the truth of what happened, we forensically analyzed the visual evidence unwittingly provided by the Russian reports, combining those pictures.
So they didn't.
So this is augmented.
So I just hope whenever I'm accused of a crime or a murder, I hope someone imagines the crime scene and then presents it to a court.
I hope that's what happens Because that's exactly what they're fucking doing there.
And they got a thousand percent wrong.
And they won an award for this, by the way.
Did you know they won an award for this?
And it's all made up.
It's all just bullshit.
They took, they started from a conclusion that Assad gasses people with chlorine.
They started at that conclusion and then they built up evidence to justify it.
None of it's true.
It's all made up.
Totally fucking bullshit.
And they've never apologized for it.
By the way, no one else reported this either, except fucking the Jimmy Dorch show and maybe Tucker Carlson.
That's about, I haven't seen it anywhere else, right?
So this is, so they do this bullshit.
They go, hey, New York Times, we say it happened.
So there you go.
And then Trump announces a strike.
So that's, you see, Trump, I'm going to pull out of Syria.
They say there was a chemical weapons.
Then all these news media said that's certainly what happened, even though it's not what happened.
And then you get Brian Williams saying this.
I'm guided by the beauty of our weapons.
So this is.
So that's when they launched a strike, right?
And then he nuts in his pants at a missile strike, like they all do.
And then, so earlier this year, it was leaked that a whistleblower who had wrote written part of the report, he was an engineer.
They wrote the engineering report for the OPCW, which is the organization for the prevention of chemical weapons.
And they put out a report saying, yeah, it looks like Assad gassed his people, which was a real head scratcher because the OPCW is supposed to be neutral, right?
And they usually do good work.
And then a guy, whistleblower, they found out that the engineering report that debunked that theory was taken out of the report.
And here's what it was: the briefing note on the final report of the OPCW fact-finding mission on the alleged chemical attack.
And this is it.
This is the engineering assessment of two cylinders observed at the Douma Institute.
This is what was left out.
They left this part out.
And so this guy says the OPCW confirms that the leaked document on alleged gas cylinders at Duma and Syria is genuine.
So they're saying, yep, that is genuine, that part that was left out.
And then this guy says the leaked OPCW engineer's assessment is confirmed as genuine, which means the final report actively concealed evidence that the DOMA chemical attack was staged by jihadists and the White Helmets.
The OPCW's other Syria reports must now be treated as worthless too.
And so here's the part they left out.
The summary.
In summary, observations at the scene of these two locations, together with subsequent analysis, suggests that there is a higher probability that both cylinders were manually placed at those two locations rather than being delivered from aircraft.
That was kept out of the report.
This was also kept out.
The new information we have removes all doubt that the organization has been hijacked at the top by France, UK, and the United States.
We have no doubt that most OPCW staff continue to do their jobs professionally and that some who are uneasy about the direction that the organization has taken nevertheless wish to protect its reputation.
However, what is at stake here is more than the reputation of an organization.
That stage incident in Douma provoked a missile attack by the United States, the UK, and France on 4th of April, 14th of April, 2018.
That could have led to an all-out war.
The cover-up of evidence that the Douma incident was staged is not merely misconduct.
As the staging of the DOMA incident entailed mass murder of civilians, those in the OPCW who have suppressed the evidence of staging are unwittingly or otherwise colluding with mass murder.
Okay, so that got reported.
We reported it.
Robert Fisk reported this was all bullshit in real time as it was happening.
We reported that too.
We were smeared by it for reporting that by CNN, thank you, and by Washington Post.
There's another one.
So this just happened.
There's a second whistleblower.
Internal OPCW email, the OPCW management accused of doctoring Syrian chemical weapons report.
So I'll just cut to the meat of it.
Firstly, there is a statement in the redacted report.
It states that there is sufficient evidence to determine the presence of chlorine or another reactive chlorine-containing chemical.
So in the official report, it said, yeah, looks like it was chlorine, except the email points out this.
There was likely one or more chemicals that contain a reactive chlorine atom.
Such chemicals could include the major ingredient of household chlorine-based bleach.
Purposely singling out chlorine gas as one of the possibilities is disingenuous.
They kept that out of the report.
He also cites problems with paragraphs in the redacted version, which states, based on high levels of various chlorinated organic derivatives detected in an environmental samples, this is said to overstate the case, according to the email.
They were, in most cases, present only in parts per billion range, as low as one to two parts per billion, which is essentially trace quantities, which means that there wasn't any chlorine in the area when they sampled it.
That's what he's saying.
They kept that out of the report, okay?
One piece of evidence which was shown on news networks across the world was a video said to show victims being treated in a hospital in the aftermath of the attack in Douma.
The symptoms shown were, however, not consistent with what witnesses reported seeing that day.
A detailed discussion of this was apparently omitted from the redacted version of the OPCW report.
And so finally, omitting this section of the report, including the epidemiology, if that's how you say that word, which has been removed in its entirety, has a serious negative impact on the report as this section is inextricably linked to the chemical agent identified.
In this case, the confidence in the identity of chlorine or any other choking agent is drawn into question precisely because of the inconsistency with the reported and observed symptoms.
The inconsistency was not only noted by the fact-finding mission team, but strongly supported by three toxicologists with expertise and exposure to chemical warfare.
So they're saying the expert testimony that debunked this gas attack was on purpose left out of the OPCW report, which means it never fucking happened, which means it was 100% propaganda, just like we reported at this show fucking a year ago, and it's still not being reported in mainstream news.
CNN's not covering this.
Fucking MSNBC is not covering this.
I went and I looked.
They're not covering this.
You know who is covering this?
Me and Tucker fucking Carlson.
That's who's covering this.
And shame on Chris Hayes and shame on fucking Jake Tapper and Rachel Maddow and Chris Matthews and everybody else who lets Tucker Carlson and me fucking scoop them.
That's how shitty they are that we can tell a story that's super fucking important that they don't have the balls to tell.
Why does Tucker Carlson allowed to tell the truth about this?
I have no fucking idea.
So let me throw it to my panel.
Let me throw it to my panel.
Let me tell you.
I have a question.
Did any of these scientists or experts from the OPCW when they were compiling this report, did any of them sniff a backpack?
Because that's sort of how I tell.
They probably did.
That's how I sniff about chlorine gas.
Well, you know, like I did a video about that new WikiLeaks.
What's also in that email, too, is the fact that the head of the OPCW was from Turkey, that one that like pushed for the omissions was from Turkey.
And also, there's a lot of things that they did to manipulate.
They tried to manipulate this port at a lot of levels.
So the first gas attack was on April 7th, I believe.
Then the bombing happened on the 14th of April, and they weren't even allowed to get into Douma until after the bombing.
So they were literally trying to bomb the evidence of their fake fucking gas attack.
It's unbelievable.
They weren't allowed in there for two weeks.
And we were all saying at the time, what's the rush?
Why don't you let the people go in and do the investigation?
And if it turns out it was, then we'll have.
But what's the rush to bomb Assad?
You guys been trying to bomb Assad since 2004.
What's the rush right now?
Why can't you wait a week for the OPCW to do that?
That's exactly right, right?
Yeah, that's exactly what happened.
So they made sure that bomb happened.
That's why they were just like, oh, bomb, even like the New York Times and the corporate media was using alleged gas attack, and that was enough.
That's it.
That was it.
Alleged gas attack, and we get to fucking bomb everybody.
And then they couldn't.
The OPC wasn't even allowed in there until two weeks after.
Two weeks after, exactly right.
And why weren't they allowed in there?
Because there was shelling happening by who?
By the rebels.
So the rebels wouldn't stop.
Well, wait a minute.
Well, why wouldn't they want them to come in and discover?
Oh, because they knew if they came in and discovered that there would be a bullshit story that there wasn't a chemical attack.
So I don't even want to play this.
No, Washington had seen the attack.
No American had seen it.
Nobody in Congress could tell you what proof existed that the attack had actually taken place or that Assad's government was behind it rather than some other faction, and there were many in the country's civil war.
But it didn't matter that there was literally no evidence.
Everybody in Washington began agitating for regime change war immediately, immediately, and especially on the left.
Yes, and he's right.
And that's sad.
It's sad that when guys like Tucker Carlson and me are doing better journalism on the most important fucking story right now is our next war.
And here he is getting it right.
Why he's again, I don't know why.
Why do you guys think he's allowed to get this right?
My head's snapping back.
You know, I don't understand why Tucker Carlson on Fox television is leading on this story correctly.
I don't understand at all.
I don't know.
And by the way, it doesn't, which proves that the fact that Tucker and I have been getting this story right from day one, it proves that it doesn't take an intellect to do it.
All it takes is a bullshit detector and a willingness to tell the truth.
So for whatever reason, Tucker Carlson has a willingness to tell the truth about this, and he can see anybody can see this as fucking bullshit.
If I can see it, they all know it's bullshit.
That's what makes me so pissed off when I turn on the fucking TV news.
I know they're all fucking lying, every last fucking one of them, and they're lying about war.
And then they wag their finger at Trump, and I want to take their finger, break it off, and stick it up their fucking ass.
That's what I want to do with this.
Because there's no anti-war movement in this goddamn country.
There isn't one.
There's Medea Benjamin.
And then no one, and like neoliberal friends of mine, that we all know in Hollywood working show business said to me, well, Trump had to bomb Syria.
You saw those videos.
I was like, what?
You don't question those at all?
You claim to hate Trump, but you're so just war.
Well, we got to go to war.
It's unfucking believable.
But they didn't live through it.
They didn't live through the Iraq war.
You mean when the television, they just completely make shit up.
You the guys that lived through that?
Or fucking Libya.
You didn't live through that either.
It's crazy that.
Well, Libya didn't get reported correctly on the news.
That's why.
And so there is.
I mean, seriously, I think everybody on this panel doesn't want Donald Trump to get us in more war.
No, no.
Right?
Does anybody here want Donald Trump to get us in?
Raise your hand.
I want to see you.
I want to talk to you.
Come on.
None of us want more war.
He's an idiot.
He's a moron.
He's crazy.
He's suffering from dementia.
He's a wannabe dictator.
But you got to let him bomb Syria.
I would say one thing about Fox News Channel.
They fall in the same category as the rest of the mainstream media.
Apart from this, they are warmongers there.
So I think, I mean, I don't wave the banner for Fox News Channel.
I think that makes us all the more remarkable that he's allowed to stand out on this lineup.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
And so, and I love how people give people like Glenn Greenwald and Tulsi a hard time.
Oh, you go on Tucker Carlson again?
It's like, yeah, he's the only one telling the truth about the fucking regime change wars.
Shame on everybody else.
You guys should be embarrassed that they have to.
And you know why Glenn Greenwald has to go on Tucker Carlson to tell the truth about the fucking wars or Russia Gate or the impeachment?
Because he's not invited on MSNBC or CNN.
The last time he was invited on CNN was in 2016, which goes to show you that Chris Hayes and Rachel Maddow know they're fucking lying.
Because if they thought they were right, they would bring on people like Glenn Greenwald to fucking debate them or Aaron Matte or Max Blumenthal or a shithead like me.
But they're even afraid of fucking people like me.
That's what fucking soft pussies they are.
Wait, I thought you didn't like them.
I'm so conflicted about it.
I'm confused now, too.
I like pussies, but not when they're being woman.
Do you remember the millions of people in the streets protesting the Iraq war?
Do you remember all those lefties in the streets in the Iraq war?
Eight years of Obama taking us from two wars to seven, and the left just went the fuck to sleep.
That's what happened.
If a liberal president bombs the fuck out of the Middle East and sets poor people on fire, well, maybe it must be okay, man.
His tweets are nice.
That's right.
What we need is we need a bunch of these people.
This is a time for all nations to join us in holding Iran to answer.
So this is the guy trying to, he's given a speech that we should invade Iran.
Level of accountability and Benjamin behavior, especially its lawless pursuit of ballistic missiles.
Thank you.
That is the most ridiculous thing I have seen.
The world community wants to keep the Iranian career deal.
Our allies are the Germans, the French, the British, they want to keep in this deal.
The world community wants to keep the deal.
Let's talk about normal countries.
Let's talk about Saudi Arabia.
Is that who our allies are?
They are the biggest people to the world community.
And let's talk, you're hurting me.
You're actually hurting.
You're born on the street.
I want to ask, do you think these sanctions are hurting the regime?
Are they hurting the Iranian people?
They're hurting the Iranian people.
You are making a case for war with Iran.
First of all, I love the guy who keeps the microphone in there.
Isn't that awesome?
Jimmy, that woman should be on this panel instead of me, to be perfectly honest.
The war with Iraq turned out.
You're doing exactly the same thing we did in the case of Iraq.
We don't want another war in the Middle East.
How does Iraq turn out?
How did Libya turn out?
We have the people of Syria suffering.
And how dare you bring up the issue of Yemen?
It's the Saudi bombing that is killing most people in Yemen.
So let's get real.
Oh my gosh.
It's time for all nations to join this.
I'm in love.
I'm absolutely in love.
I love like no matter she does not waver at all.
Like she's like the most flexible person.
She's just like, get us out of my ramp.
I know what you're taking, but you're not going to go to my mouth.
Your wives are bullshit.
I don't want to go to Iraq.
Iran is wrong.
You're bullshitting more than all.
I want to be my back for war.
Why are you doing that for war?
She's being carried out like a Cirque de Soleil performer.
And she doesn't miss a beat.
She doesn't miss a beat.
If you weren't looking at her, you'd think she was a talking head on, you know, MSNBC.
Both of these are raised.
They're carrying her out like a fucking sack of beans and she doesn't skip a goddamn beat.
She's a superhero.
Yes, mad respect, Jimmy, for that woman.
So I would like to make a recommendation to Amya Benjamin because I think she should just throw this in every so often.
You've touched my pussy.
I guarantee you, all those men were like, whoa!
You know they will.
Ladies, use it in the future.
There you go, my gift to you.
All I can say is that is my favorite episode of The Bachelor.
Boy, she didn't get a rose and she does not take it well.
Let's get real.
Oh, I would love to do just a series of sketches of her just interrupting anything.
Just like Gordon Ramsey cooking show.
Your cooking is murdering people, your sanctions.
Just anything, you know what I mean?
Half time at the Zuber Bowl.
What do you think to score the scars?
We're all losing because of your war machine.
Stop your goddamn imperialism.
Just anywhere.
Put her anywhere.
So speaking of groceries, there is a town in Florida.
There's a town in Florida called Baldwin, Florida.
And 68% of the 1,600 residents of Baldwin, Florida, where the median income is $44,000 a year, they voted for Trump.
Right?
And here's where it is.
You can see where it is.
It's right by Jacksonville.
It's up there.
It's about a 20-minute drive to the ocean from Baldwin to the ocean.
And well, guess what happened?
Recently, they lost their only grocery store, which has been a particular hardship for the large number of seniors who live there, many of whom are no longer able to drive.
So what did they do?
Bunch of Trump voters, what did they do?
Well, they opened up a city-run grocery store that operates on a break-even basis with the clerks, stalkers, butchers, and other staff all drawing paychecks from City Hall.
Isn't that something?
Yes.
Well, this is the definition of socialism.
This is unquestionably a socialist enterprise, but the town's residents don't see it that way.
As Mayor Sean Lynch, a retired Navy vet, told Washington Post, we take the water out of the ground and we pump it to your house and charge you.
That's called socialism.
So what's the difference with the grocery store?
There's no difference.
They're both crooked.
They're both socialists.
They're both fucking socialists.
When the government sends something to your house and then you pay the government for providing a service, that's called socialism.
That's what it is.
People don't want to think that.
Well, what about, you know, just like paying for the fire department.
That fucking socialism.
Wait, Jimmy, what about libraries that they open at the public expense and anybody can go there?
That's not socialism, is it?
Socialism.
The police departments, libraries, parks, street cleaning, snowplows.
So I'm guessing that a lot of these people get up in the morning, they put something in their mailbox, they put their garbage out on the curb, and then they send their kid to public school, but they're not fucking socialists.
They are not socialists.
That's not socialism.
No.
So far, though, the experiment has been a success.
The town council had hoped to take in $3,500 a day, and sales have routinely exceeded that.
So their socialism is working really well down there.
And the idea that municipalities should have to beg.
So this is the mayor talking.
He says the idea that municipalities should have to beg private companies to provide basic goods and services to its people is absurd.
And being able to say we will just do it ourselves is very powerful.
Yeah, I know.
Socialism is very fucking powerful.
Yes, that was the mayor saying that.
What's that?
Put your faith in the government, right?
No, no, they put your faith in...
No, it's the people.
So the government is the mayor who's a guy that lives next door to that guy, and they voted for him.
What's that?
Until the government changes.
Well, who is the government?
The government isn't some outside force from Mars.
The government are people, people that get to run for government that you know.
So when you say government, you act like it's some outside force that's coming in.
It's an occupying force.
It's not.
Government are people that are made up of in our communities.
And what's the problem is that the people who are elected to government are the people who have the most money right now because they have the most money to manipulate the system.
And the problem, that's the problem.
The problem isn't government.
The problem is the kind of fucking government because everybody likes government.
You like the fire department, don't you?
I do.
Do you like the fire departments?
Do you like roads?
Do you like libraries?
Do you like that kind of shit?
Do you like the military?
That's the fucking government.
You like electricity?
I hate cops.
That's the one thing.
That's the one thing.
I'm all for unions except cop unions.
I don't think they should be able to have unions.
So I hear your point.
I get your point about that government's corrupt and why would you want government to control things because government is corrupt.
But this is a local government.
They all know who's in the.
So that's why when you say bring it home local so it's less corrupt.
And so they're running their own fucking...
We're going to do it ourselves.
And guess what?
It's working.
It's working.
And you know, Jimmy, this is on another level, but in California, we are the fifth largest economy in the world.
In the world.
The world.
So why don't we all have health care?
And why don't we have affordable housing?
So it's my government needs to work better for me, Gavin Newsom, who made promises.
So let me just ask this guy, what would you do in that situation?
There's no grocery store.
Would you say, well, I guess we should just starve?
Yeah.
No, Amazon.
Well, maybe the corporate is that would bring it to the camera.
Okay.
I'm pretty sure I freaked out with the guy just told me.
I would rather think I just want this argument.
Okay.
But they've why don't you exercise your freedom to not have food?
Well, it also shows too, like, what we talk about a lot is it's got to start on a local level.
When we all get involved in our local, when we put progressives and socialists in our school boards and our local small town mayors and stuff like Gail McLaughlin did that and what was that city in all right so up Richmond California they beat they beat Exxon yes yeah so yeah so what I would say is again it's not it's not government that's the boogeyman.
It's the kind of government you have.
And right now, we have a government of oligarchs that is fucking everyone and trying to make you to think that the people who are actually fucking you are immigrants, people with no money and no power.
The people who are fucking you are the people with power.
That's who the people are sticking in your ass.
And they're the ones who are also letting the immigrants come in and work for fucking pennies because they can exploit them.
If you lost your job, it wasn't because an immigrant took it, it's because a capitalist found someone else they could exploit even fucking harder than you.
That's what's happening.
Okay.
Okay.
Jimmy, I don't know about you, but when I go shopping for food, I don't feel comfortable unless I know that at least part of what I'm paying goes to someone like John Mackey.
That all the money that we spend is distributed among the people who work there and to pay for it.
I just, that doesn't seem right to me.
That doesn't seem right.
So, I'm rolling my eyes at that.
So, I don't know.
I don't know if you know, I believe in what Dr. Richard Wolf believes.
I believe in workers owning the means of production.
So, if you say, well, if you let the government run something, it's all fucked up.
But if you let a capitalist run something, then at his whim, he can pull the rug out from underneath an entire community, take his company, and fucking leave somewhere else, which is exactly what they do all the time.
That's what's happening in Ohio.
That's what happened in Rockford, Illinois, that's what happened in Anderson, Indiana.
That's what's happening right now in Michigan, all over the place, because they're taking their and they're going to Mexico because they can build something even cheaper there because the capitalists can make more money.
Now, if the company, if the people but if the people in the city own that company, then they would go, well, this doesn't make any sense that we would then ship our company to another country.
Let's keep it here and we'll fucking be capitalists here.
But we own the means of production, which is so much smarter than letting a capitalist pull the fucking rug out from underneath an entire community.
I've traveled all around this country for the last 30 years as a stand-up comic.
I've done comedy shows in Flint, Michigan.
I've done comedy shows in Anderson, Indiana, and Rockford, Illinois.
I've seen what happens when a capitalist decides to take his company and go to a fucking more desperate people in a more desperate situation.
You know what they do?
The first thing they do is they build a bigger jail.
That's the first fucking thing they do: build a bigger jail.
Watch Roger and me, that Michael Moore filmed.
That's the first thing they did.
That's exactly what they do all over the place.
And then everybody's fucked.
And so that's what's wrong with capitalism.
And capitalism eats itself.
And what do you call a system that takes the richest country the face of the earth has ever seen and renders half of its population poor or low income?
80% of workers live in paycheck to paycheck and 30 million people without health insurance.
You call that a failed fucking system.
That system that we're living in right now, this capitalist system, has failed.
Go look at the fucking homeless people underneath the bridge you had to drive by to get to this show tonight.
That is a failed fucking system.
Okay.
So happy holidays, everyone.
Have a holly, jolly Christmas.
It's the best time of the year.
Okay, this is Jimmy.
Who's this?
Jimmy Baby, it's Double V. Oh, hello.
It's conservative actor Vince Vaughan.
How are you?
I'm calling you to tell you to buy some stock in Raytheon because we're going to war with Tyran, baby.
Hey, you know, there's a lot more to that phone call, but we don't have time in today's podcast.
How do you hear the entire phone call?
You got to become a premium member.
Go to JimmyDorkComedy.com, sign up.
It's the most affordable premium program in the business.
Don't freak out.
Don't freak out.
Today's show was written.
That's right.
It was written by Frank Connoff, Jim Earl, Ron Placone, Steph Samurano, and Mark Van Landowicz.
All the voices today performed by the one and the only, the inimitable Mike McRae, who can be found at mikemcrae.com.
That's it for this week.
you be the best you can be, and I'll keep being me.
Don't freak out.
Do not, do not.
Do not freak.
Do not freak.
Do not freak out.
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