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Nov. 6, 2015 - Jimmy Dore Show
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Today's show is brought to you by Casper Beds.
You can get $50 off of any mattress courtesy of the Jimmy Doer show.
That's $50 off.
All you have to do is go to casper.com slash Jimmy and use the promo code Jimmy.
That's right.
Casper.com slash Jimmy and use the promo code Jimmy to get $50 off.
Now let's get to this week's show.
Get ready for an outstanding entertainment program.
The Jimmy Dore Show!
The Jimmy Dore Show!
Jimmy Harrison Ford.
Look, I just want all your listeners to watch Supergirl on.
I forget which channel, but I'm pretty sure you can find it in the TV guide or whatever.
Yeah, so my wife, Callista Flockhart, is in us.
By the way, do you know anyone else named Callista?
This sounds like a made-up name to me.
Anyway, she's in the Supergirl show, and she plays a woman who's over 40.
She's not real happy about it, but I'm like, you know, what are you going to do?
Everyone should watch this thing because I really don't want to make another Indiana Jones movie.
Regarding Henry 2 or whatever they keep telling me.
So, yeah, the Supergirl thing is pretty good.
Like she flies around and says sassy things.
She lifts heavy objects.
You know, shoots crap out of her eyes.
It's pretty, it's pretty great.
And then the other thing is, if everyone could try to not see that new Star Wars thing, you'd really be helping me out.
I mean, if I know people don't see that thing, then I don't have to make another one and I can stay home and fly planes.
Maybe listen to some Allman brothers.
So get the word out.
Don't see Star Wars and watch Supergirl on your television.
Uh-uh.
It's the Jimmy Dore Show.
the show for the kind of people It's the show that makes Anderson Cooper save.
It's hard to talk to Kevin.
And now, here's a guy who sounds a lot like me.
It's Jimmy Dore.
Hi, everybody.
Welcome to this week's show.
I am joined in the studio, Emmy Award winner, the host of the Edge podcast.
It's Mark Thompson.
He's back.
How are you, Mark?
Thank you.
Please keep your seats, Jimmy and friends.
Where can people find that Edge podcast?
It's at edge-show.com.
It's also called The Edge with Mark Thompson.
Unfortunately, there are a lot of podcasts called The Edge.
Yeah, it was a very poor choice on my part.
But you can find it on iTunes and Stitcher and all the places that better podcasts are carried.
But you have to put my name in along with.
Oh, that is too.
There's only one Jimmy Doer show.
Yeah, I know.
I got lucky.
Yeah, that was for the Edge.
All the way from New York City, you know him, you love him from Mystery Science Theater 3000.
It's TV Frank, Frank Coniff.
Hi, Frank.
Hello there.
Frank, I hear you have a new podcast out.
I do.
The latest episode of my Podhouse 90 podcast, it's called the Agoraphobic Action League.
It's the least action-packed superhero story ever told.
And it sounds, who's in that?
Anybody special?
Well, John Fiegelsang is in it.
Oh, look at that.
And two New York comedians.
I don't think you know, but they're really great.
Carolina Hildago and Tiana Miller.
Okay.
And I play convoluted man in it, for those of you...
Pothouse 90 and what the...
Okay.
Also, next to him from the miserable liberal blog, our resident Latina, it's Steph Zamarano.
Hi, Steph.
Hey, Jimmy.
I'm still here.
Yes, Trump has not thrown you out yet.
Fantastic.
Also with us, running the board, Hilarious comedian Michael Schurzer.
Michael, now you have a big show coming up November 14th, correct?
That is correct, Jimmy.
I'm very excited that you and Laura Keitlinger from SNL will be headlining my show.
Yes, that'll be November 14th.
That's a Saturday, correct?
And that's the Malibu.
Saturday at 8 p.m.
Doors at 8.
Show at 8.30.
You can find tickets at malibuplayhouse.org or on jimmy doorcomedy.com.
That's going to be a good show.
That's going to be fantastic.
We'd love to have you out, Mark.
Last time we were there, Mark, I met Dick Van Dyke.
He was there at the show because he lives in Malibu, I guess.
Yeah, exactly.
He's the mayor.
He was the mayor of Malibu.
Oh, he should be.
Yeah.
And anyway, it was fantastic.
Highlight of my life.
Sam Elliott and Catherine Ross were there, as well as Ed Asner.
There's a lot of, there's always a lot of famous people hanging out at the stand-up shows we do at Malibu.
Yeah.
So coming out.
It's a good time.
Good time.
See you there November 14th.
But now let's get to the jokes before we get to the jokes, shall we?
Hey, by the way, I just want to know why do people make up words?
I just, would someone please man explain that to me?
Please, somebody.
Hey, by the way, the state of comedy today, the state of comedy today, colon, the state of comedy today, Trump refuses to debate on NBC again, but feels perfectly comfortable hosting their late night satirical show.
Oh, very good twist.
Afraid of their newsmen, not afraid of their comedians.
Doesn't that say a lot?
Says a lot.
Trump and Lauren Michaels have issued a statement telling the spirits of Lenny Bruce, Richard Pryor, and George Carlin to go fuck themselves.
You know, an equal rights ordinance was overturned in Texas on this election this week.
That election, they overturned an equal rights ordinance was overturned in Texas.
And you know, if we're not careful, Mark, that could happen in America, too.
Hey, did you hear Ahmed Chalabi died?
Ahmed Chalabi, he was the guy who told everybody, he confirmed with Dick Cheney that we had WMDs in Iraq, and he died.
And in lieu of flowers, the family requests that false claims about WMDs be donated to the Bush Library.
Very eminent American dollars and innocent civilians.
Hey, did you hear Trump and Carson are leading in the poll, Trump and Carson?
And it's because GOP voters want someone with no history of elective politics or common decency.
Come on, to be fair, did you hear about that dietary supplement Ben Carson endorsed?
I mean, to be fair, that dietary supplement Ben Carson endorsed, it did work for him.
It removed all traces of honesty and integrity from his bloodstream.
That's what it did.
I think that's what it's supposed to do.
Either that or a placebo.
Hey, did you hear that the Anonymous is going to come out with the KK members to GOP Who are also part of the KKK?
One of the people they alleged was Senator Cornyn from Texas.
And experts say if this proves to be true, his poll numbers will skyrocket.
They're popular in Texas.
Tough on Texas today, Jimmy.
Tough on Texas.
Got a lot of listeners in Texas, actually.
I love Texas, man.
I know it sounds funny.
I don't love it.
I used to enjoy the people I would meet when I would go there in that flat, hot state.
Austin's in the middle of the day.
Austin's a nice place.
Yeah, yeah.
You know what?
I was like, I was like, it's got more humidity than my shower.
How do you do that?
Austin.
Hey, by the way, have you tried their breakfast tacos?
Oh, my God.
You got to try their breakfast tacos.
Oh, you mean eggs, beans, and salsa?
Yeah, have you tried them?
Yeah, I've tried them.
Hey, but if you know what they are.
If you're a listener and supporter of the Jimmy Door show, we obviously don't mean you.
No, not you.
But have you tried the breakfast tacos in Austin?
You have to try the breakfast tacos.
The eggs and bean and a corn tortilla.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Have you tried it?
Yes, I have.
Why are you looking at me like that?
Because that's what they say.
When you go down there, everybody acts like a big thing.
Yeah, I'm concurring.
I just don't understand why one breakfast burrito to the next state would be so different.
Yeah, have you tried to do it?
Well, have you tried it?
Have you?
Hey, what's coming up on today?
Jeb Bush.
Can he fix it?
We're going to talk about that.
He's doing some stand-up comedy.
Plus, the 9-11 First Responders Healthcare Bill.
A lot of controversy surrounding that.
We're going to talk about it.
Ben Carson, the wisdom of Ben Carson, right?
So we're going to talk about the wisdom of Ben Carson coming up today.
Plus, how is the media covering the Ben Carson campaign?
They're gushing more than an oil well over him.
We're going to talk about that later.
Robert Redford, the spitting image of Dan Rather, by the way, is playing Dan Rather at a new movie.
And he went on with Chris Hardball.
You can't believe what Robert Redford said on a corporate news show and how quickly it got ignored.
Plus, does it help to give poor people money?
We'll find out.
We got phone calls today from Harrison Ford calls in today.
Reince Priebus.
Oh, that's a good cat.
And Ripped Horns, Hollywood Drunk Tank.
Yeah, I love that.
That's coming up today on The Jimmy Dore Show.
Benghazi.
The fragrance so captivating, they'll never want to let you go.
Benghazi, mysterious, preoccupying, infatuating.
Benghazi.
Watch them go from grasping for straws to grasping for you with a new scent that will drive right-wingers to distraction.
Benghazi.
Tonight, make something out of nothing and let that special someone finally get to the bottom of you with Bendazi.
Nice, nice.
Bye.
Bye.
Thank you.
The Jimmy Dore show is available as a podcast for free on iTunes.
Or for other ways to subscribe, go to JimmyDoorComedy.com.
And while you're there, you can listen to past episodes and you can comment on them too.
Remember, Jimmy spells his last name, D-O-R-E, jimmydorecomedy.com.
Thank you.
So Jeb Bush is flailing in the polls, and it's because I think the problem is that he reminds people too much of his brother.
You can't help it.
He looks like him.
He says stupid stuff, and he's defending the Iraq war.
So here he is.
He's turning to he's trying everything.
He attacked Marco Rubio.
That backfired on him.
He fired half his stats, his staff.
He tried answering questions by saying blah, blah, blah.
He's tried everything.
Now he's going to stand-up comedy.
I don't know if you've seen, I don't know if you've seen his speeches.
So here we go.
Here's Jeb Bush doing some stand-up comedy.
If Lincoln were alive today, imagine the foolishness he would have to suffer.
Think about it.
Advisors telling him to shave his beard.
First of all, I just like the delivery.
The delivery is so smooth.
It's like, I don't know, Suri tells better jokes.
He says better delivery than Jeb Bush does.
Could you imagine that nightmare he'd have to ever.
But let's listen to what he says.
This is how he's doing comedy.
He's literally doing comedy.
If Lincoln were alive today, imagine the foolishness he would have to suffer.
Imagine the foolishness he would have to suffer.
The foolishness.
That's your setup.
That's your premise, right, Michael?
This is your setup.
I like it.
Now let's tie it together with a punchline.
Ready?
Boom.
Think about it.
Advisors telling him to shave his beard.
Think about it.
That's what he says.
Think about it.
That's his catchphrase.
Think about it.
Jeb, exclamation.
Think about it, question mark.
Cable pundits telling him to lose the top hat.
Same joke twice.
What says a beard?
What says top hat?
What's funnier, Jimmy?
What should he have gone with?
Just one.
Pick one.
Yeah.
Here we go.
Opposition researchers calling him a five-time loser before he was 50.
That'll make him a five-time loser before he was 50.
That one was a little too true.
Heard him.
Heard him to say it.
It also makes me think that Bush feels like I've been a five-time loser.
Yeah, it does make me think.
Like, oh, people are calling you a five-time loser?
I didn't even hear that one.
Right, I was going to say, I don't recall that either.
I imagine him with one hand and a microphone.
He's kind of rolling the mic stand around with as he kind of tells it.
It goes, does his set, you know?
Where are you folks from?
He hasn't gotten to that part yet, I guess.
Listen, if Lincoln were alive today.
If Liga were alive today, thanks to Republicans blocking gun control, he would be assassinated again.
Bang.
If he was alive today, he wouldn't be wearing a top hat because Republicans don't believe in contraception.
I don't think it goes on with that too.
That is sad.
If Abraham Lincoln was alive today, he wouldn't be a Republican.
Yeah.
Bam, that's good.
Huh?
That's a mic drop.
I don't know why.
Why is he referring to Mary Todd as a beard?
That's what I don't understand.
That's not nice.
A lot of Republicans still have beards today.
He tells jokes like a customer service operator tells you how much longer you have on hold.
That's his delivery.
So that's Jeb Bush trying to...
Can I hear him just one more time?
Let's go one more time.
Imagine the foolishness he would have to suffer.
I love that they chose that verbiage.
Imagine the foolishness that he'd have to suffer.
Imagine no one talks like that.
Why not just go with, you know, imagine what that would be like.
Imagine the foolishness he would have to.
What would that be like?
What are the enduring?
And I can't help but think every time about his mother, Barbara saying, no, I don't.
We don't need another Bush as president.
Like, I think she was doing that to protect him.
I agree.
Yes, I agree, because she knew he actually is the dumber Bush.
So Robert Redford is doing a new movie called Truth is About.
He explains how Dan Rather told the truth about George W. Bush skipping his National Guard service and how the right wing coordinates with corporate news to screw the truth and the truth tellers.
So he went on hardball and Tweety served up.
He gave him a tongue bath.
And here, and here he's telling him what a great and courageous job.
Woodward Bernstein team, you captured the excitement and the honesty of those guys, the courage to take on a presidency and all his men.
So he's talking about when Robert Redford wasn't all the president's men and what a great job they did and how courageous.
Woodward Bernstein team, you captured the excitement and the honesty of those guys, the courage to take on a presidency and all his men and to have them do it just as two young guys.
I mean, you really do find the romance in politics and in journalism, and especially when they clash.
So there you go.
So there he's really wow.
Yeah, boy, you really did it too.
That Woodward and Bernstein standing up to power and blah, blah, blah.
So listen, so here.
And I love that.
I love that Jeremiah Johnson too.
So here, listen to this.
So then here, Robert Redford starts to answer.
There's a difference.
So he says, there's a difference between Woodward and Bernstein and what happened to Dan Rather with the George Bush National Guard scandal.
And what's the difference?
Because with Woodward and Bernstein, they were going after the truth.
They were digging in to get to the truth against the odds of an administration that did not want that revealed.
Yeah.
But they had the support of their bosses.
They had Kay Graham and they had Ben Bradley.
They had support.
On this situation, you had Rather and Mapes trying to do the very same thing, but in the end, they did not have the support of their bosses because if you look at the picture, then you get into that whole thing about the conjunction between.
First of all, let me just say: Chris Matthews knows something about people having the support of their bosses.
I mean, on the other hand, he understands supporting his bosses, like when he supported his bosses when they fired Phil Donahue.
So he knows about supporting his bosses, not the other way around.
And if Chris Matthews had been around during Watergate, he would have did a whole segment on how manly G. Gordon Liddy looked.
Yes.
Yes, he said.
And that actually reminds me that, and I'm not making this up, his first show after the George W. Bush mission accomplished flight suit aircraft carrier event, his first guest on his next show was G. Gordon Liddy, and they spent the entire segment talking about how manly George Bush looked and how great it is.
I'm not making it up.
You can look that up online.
You can find the transcripts.
They talk about how great his crotch looked.
I'm not joking.
And he called the people who were against the war carpers and complainers.
Yes, yes.
Like people like Jack Murthy.
What are they going to say now?
The carpers and complainers.
That's what he says.
So that's Chris Matthews.
So we know who Chris, we've done this.
So let's listen to Robert Redford.
Corporations, I know.
Media.
So listen to Chris Matthews pretending to agree with Robert Redford as he makes the point that corporations are screwing up news.
Listen to this.
Not have the support of their bosses because if you look at the picture, then you get into that whole thing about the conjunction between corporations, media, and journalism.
I mean, boy, I'll tell you, I'm a big devotee of honest good news.
And I remember there was a time, and I think the film says this, there was a time when there was, the news was sacrosanct.
That's what it was.
Entertainment had its area, and the news had its area.
It was sacrosanct.
Slowly what happened is that entertainment at some point began to creep into the news and it changed the dynamic.
I think that's kind of sad because I think news is vitally important.
Okay, so he just said that he just pointed out, Chris, corporations are corrupting the news.
AKA, you know what you do, what we're on right now.
And here's what Chris Matthews says back.
Yeah, I think you're right about the feature pieces that they do.
And by the way, that's it.
I think you're right.
You know, the feature pieces they do.
And then he, watch how fast he changes the subject.
Are you ready?
I've never seen a subject change faster in my life.
I think you're right about the feature pieces that they do.
And by the way, I've never told you this, but I got to tell you, I was in the Peace Corps on my way home from Tears in Africa.
I go to Mombasa in Kenya, and I go to see Butch Casting and Sundance Kid.
I thought I had come home.
That was America.
Another tongue bath.
Wow.
He doubled tongue baths.
Wow.
He doubled another tongue bath at the end.
So he basically literally calls out Chris Matthew, like, hey, corporate news is screwed up, and they don't support real.
And we wouldn't have had Woodwood and Bernstein in this day and age because they know.
Oh, yeah, I think you're right with the feature pieces.
Listen, I remember when I was coming back from Africa, I remember I saw that Sundance game.
Yeah, Bushcassidy was good, wasn't it?
Wow, wasn't that good?
That Bush.
It's almost, you know, it's sort of a version of the Chris Farley character.
Yes, yes, yes.
Remember when you remember talking about the corruption in corporate media, and he immediately pivots to, oh, remember when you were Butchcasty, the Sundance kid?
Remember when you were like, and you jumped off the cliff and you didn't want to jump off the cliff because you said you didn't swim, and then you went flying out into the river and you got away.
Remember that?
That's exactly what he's doing.
I've never seen someone switch topics so quickly.
He basically, and then he goes, yeah, I agree with you on that.
The feature pieces.
What are you talking about?
I hate when that's done and you don't have the decency to let the guy respond.
I wish Redford had said, no, I'm talking about you playing Trump your whole show.
Yeah, dude, 24 Hours of Trump.
And when real journalism happens, you fire them like Ed Schultz and Phil Donahue.
That's what, you know, at least Amy Goodman, when she's, you know, Chris Matthews was bringing on game Amy Goodman in the 2012 elections, and she brought that stuff up.
Yeah.
And guess what?
She hasn't been back.
And she has never been back.
She brought up that Phil Donahue firing right to his face on live TV.
And that was the last time you saw her.
Right, right.
So just let me just say, if Robert Redford hadn't made Butch Cassidy, Chris Matthews would still be in Africa today.
He never should have made.
You know, the Vietnam War was really bad, but God, I love Barefoot in the Park.
I love Barefoot in the Park.
So Reince Priebus is in a pickle, right, because nobody's paying attention to the Republican National Committee, and he's the chairman of the Republican National Committee, and Ben Carson, and Donald Trump, and nobody's listening to him because they don't need him anymore because Citizens United happened.
And it used to be that the party kept control of the candidates and the process because they needed the party to give them money.
But now they don't need the party to give them money because they all have their own super PACs.
So now Rentch Priebus has no control.
So now they're all negotiating with the TV networks on their own, right?
They're going right around the RNC.
And here's what he says about Reince Priebus was asked about this, who always sounds like he's drunk and angry.
By the way, if you ever listen to him, he always sounds like a guy who's hammering his vote.
Right?
So listen to him.
This is what he says.
The truth is, we're involved.
We're in control.
We're setting the calendar.
In fact, if what happens from last night goes forward, I think it's exactly where we want to be.
So there you go.
That's right where we want to be.
Exactly.
So here I got him on.
Really?
So I got him.
Oh, you got him on the phone.
me make.
I'm not going to be here.
RNC headquarters.
Go see Star Wars at Force Awakens this December 18th in the theaters.
Hi.
I was hoping I could speak with Rinch Priebus.
And who's this now?
It's Jimmy Doer from the Jimmy Door Show on Pacifica Radio.
Okay.
Talk to the chairman.
Go ahead.
Go ahead.
Is this you, Mr. Chairman?
Yes.
Oh, Greg, can I ask you a few questions?
Okay, just can we not make them too hard, Jimmy?
Did you know I'm hurting cats over here, and I really don't know how much more I can take.
Well, I just wanted to know about the CNPC debate the other night.
Yeah, that was pretty not good there.
So you didn't like some of the questions the moderators asked.
Well, sure, Jimmy.
I mean, for instance, asking Donald Trump if he's a cartoon candidate.
Obviously, we all think that, but you don't just say it to his face.
Well, if you all think it, why don't you say it?
Look, first of all, Jimmy, you just have to be careful of what you say to Trump.
Because he really doesn't understand the difference between what we call right and wrong.
What?
Like a very strong chip.
You might ask him the wrong question, and he might rip someone's face off.
You've seen this.
The other reason you don't want to point out the ridiculous nature of a Trump candidacy is that you don't want to alienate that wing of the party.
What wing of the party?
The ones who vote for Trump.
I'd like to call them shiny objects part of the party.
Look, I don't want to get off on a Trump thing here.
Neither do I. But that guy's like the scab you can't not pick at.
And your mother is like, leave it alone.
It'll go away.
But then you can't help yourself.
When you're done, you've got Trump infection juice all over your clothes.
So you've canceled the NBC debate and you're setting some ground rules for future debates.
We are, and it's a good thing.
I mean, the party is finally coming together and saying, we're a bunch of little bitches who expect to handle the presidency, but we can't even handle a few questions we don't like.
Oh, also, our vagina's hurt.
My God, Mr. Chairman.
I'm sorry, Jimmy.
I'm just really irritable.
You know, I'm somebody who has to talk to Ted Cruz on a regular basis, which, holy shit, that makes you want to drink drain cleaner right there.
So, what are some of the new ground rules going to be, Mr. Chairman?
Well, everyone gets to make a 30-second opening and closing statement.
Okay.
Everybody gets an equal number of questions.
Uh-huh.
You're not allowed to fact-check Ben Carson.
Got it.
Jed Bush can call Lifeline if he gets stuck.
Trump gets three Estonian hookers in his dressing room.
Everyone gets to pretend Social Security is an entitlement that is going bankrupt.
Well, that just makes sense.
That just makes sense.
Ronald Reagan and Orgesis are acceptable answers to any question.
Okay.
We will be using a pop-up to choose who the next contestant is.
Seems fair.
Candidates' graphics will not include any actual experience in government.
Right.
But mainly fun facts about the candidate.
That's fun.
Like Marco Rubio once sat next to Joan Rivers on an airplane.
That is a fun fact.
Or Mike Uckabee was on the dating game three times, but never got picked.
I didn't know that.
And finally, all future debates will be hosted by Ryan Seatcrest.
Well, that sounds great, Mr. Chairman.
Look, Jimmy, I gotta go.
But just remember, James Bond wears an Omega watch.
She specter in theaters this Friday.
Okay, that's Ryan's previous ladies and sellers.
The Jimmy Door show is available as a podcast for free on iTunes.
Or for other ways to subscribe, go to JimmyDoorComedy.com.
And while you're there, you can listen to past episodes and you can comment on them too.
Remember, Jimmy spells his last name, D-O-R-E, jimmydorecomedy.com.
Thank you.
Okay, we've got a lot coming up in the second half.
Rip Torn's Hollywood drunk tank in the second half.
But right now, we're up against a break.
We'll be right back in one minute.
This is the Jimmy Doer Show on Pacifica.
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All right, now let's get back to the show.
Welcome back to the second half of the Jimmy Door show.
Rip Torrance Hollywood drunk tank coming up later on.
But right now, let's get back to the studio where I'm joined by Mark Thompson from the Edge podcast and from Mystery Science Theater 3000.
It's TV's Frank Frank Connoff.
Also with us from the Miserable Liberal blog.
It's Steph Zamarano and Michael Schertzer.
Let's get back to the studio right now.
So I don't know if you watch Morning Joe like me, but Morning Joe had something to say about because we all know that the media, one of the tenets of the book or the central points of the Jimmy Doer, Your Country's Just Not That Into You book was about how the media is owned by just a handful of people.
And in fact, oh, by the way, Rupert Murdoch bought the National Geographic, just fired 250 people.
So I don't think media consolidation is a bad thing.
What could possibly go wrong?
So it used to be, we've talked about this, and it's in the book.
In 1980, there were 50 giant media companies that controlled all the media in America, 50.
And they were big.
And now there's six.
Wow.
Some people would say five.
So for instance, we know for a fact Ed Schultz got fired from MSNBC because he was too loudly protesting against the TPP deal, which Comcast wanted.
So they fired him.
They fired Phil Donahue when he was too loudly opposing the Iraq war.
So these are corpses.
So all the news is owned by corporations, right?
And there's no left left in America, and we all know this.
And I mean, the lefty news cable show has gives, they like to kick off their programming day with Morning Joe, you know, three hours of morning right-wing talking points brought to you by Wall Street billionaires, Washington insiders, and your odd plagiarists.
Don't forget the battered female.
And a battered female.
It's more of a domestic abuse situation that Morning Joe than a real talk show.
So here's Joe talking about how, and you know, that's the whole thing.
Bernie Sanders, the first time he was ever on Meet the Press was this year when he was running.
So they'll have on John McCain until they're blue in the face, like it's if someone, like that, that spikes ratings or something, right?
And but they'll never have on, you never see on, you know, Ralph Nader, you never see on a Richard Trump cut, you never see lefty leaders.
I remember Glenn Greenwald was on when David Gregory hosted Meet the Press, and he's the one journalist I ever saw David Gregory berate.
Yes, yes, yes, it was Glenn Greenwald.
You're right.
The only journalist he ever berated.
All the bad journalists he's brought on his team.
And it was along the lines of aren't you being a traitor to the country by Snowden-related.
Yes, of course.
So here's Joe Scarborough.
If you're Tim Russert, it's okay.
All I am saying to you, and you can't do it, you can do it.
Name the single Republican that has hosted a Sunday show that has been an anchor of a news network for the big three networks over the past 15 years.
You can not do it.
First of all, Chuck Todd, David Gregory, those would be two, the last two hosts were right-wingers.
George Snuffalupagus claims to be a Democrat, yet he hangs out.
He goes to Christmas parties at Donald Rumsfeld house.
So we know this.
So this idea that pretending that George Snuffalupagus is anywhere near the left is, again, just gross for him to say that, right?
And we now have the former vice president of Fox News is the head of 60 Minutes, which is why 60 Minutes is now a joke, a discredited organization.
No one respects 60 Minutes anymore.
So the right-wing takeover of the news is complete.
If you say anything that cuts into the corporate bottom line, you get fired.
They fired Phil Donahue.
They fired Ed Schultz.
They fired Jenky Uger.
They'll fire anybody who says anything that's going to, and that's why Rachel Maddow should be a little embarrassed that she is still working there, that she hasn't said, because as soon as she says anything that costs them money, she's gone.
So here's Joe Scarborough.
And listen to Mika next to him.
And by the way, he's telling this to a panel.
Mark Halperin's on the panel.
The plagiarist is on the panel.
What's his name?
Mike Barnacle.
Mike Barnacle.
And Willie Geist is there.
We Republicans, what I'm explaining is we're told to sit back.
Tony Snow, did he host what?
Fox News Sunday?
So Mark Halperin says Tony Snow.
And he's, by the way, they're all kind of giggling.
Hey, what do we want?
Fox News Sunday.
I just said ABC, CBS, NBC.
Okay, can't do it.
And nobody out there.
I agree with you 100%.
Well, you don't sound like you would go to the middle.
I agree with you.
There's your TV news journalist.
There's your journalist.
There's your journalist.
I agree with you 100%.
Have you guys not read Manufacturing Consent by Chomsky?
Chomsky?
And do you see how defensive he got when he at all felt like there wasn't somebody who was 100% on board with what he had to say?
Yes.
He was just like, oh, so defensive.
No, I totally.
I've said for a mile career, there's huge liberal media bias.
Huge liberal media bias.
Who's saying that?
Mark Halperin.
Wow.
And because, and this is a guy who he's mad that liberals never give him helicopter rides like Donald Trump.
Yes.
Listen to the examples you've given, but I'm less prominent.
But the argument is all I'm saying.
So the question is fine with people who don't, the few people who don't fit in that category because they're all Democrats.
The people that run the Sunday shows are all Democrats.
I'm not just talking about like today.
I'm talking about for the past 50 years.
The people that have run the network.
Newscast tonight.
You hear Mark Halperin?
I agree.
I agree.
He just wants to tap out.
He's calming an angry child.
Those newscasts have been all Democrats.
I agree.
The network executives have been all Democrats.
He's so angry.
So if you wish to rant, it's so out of line.
I mean, it bears no relation to the truth.
It's totally untethered from reality, and they're all sitting around like smirking about how.
Also, but I think Scarborough is a little myth that he only has three hours a day on the air to talk about how liberal.
Yes, yes.
They only give him three hours a talk.
But he's getting another hour soon.
Yes, that'll be.
So he'll have 20 hours a week of right-wing talk by Joe Scarborough on MSNBC.
20 hours a week he will have.
I've never heard anybody say, you know what I need?
More Joe Scarborough.
More morning, Joe.
So this is, again, this is that Beltway thing of them all saying that, oh, Joe must be good, even though he gets no ratings.
No one watches the show.
No one watches.
We watch it, apparently.
I got this because it was newsbusters.org got this.
And so what they're doing is they're going, look, everyone agrees that the media is, because Newsbusters is right wing.
And they're going, look, see, even on MSNBC, they admit that the media is liberal.
This is so gross that this is happening.
Kiddiffs have been all Democrats.
I'm furious.
So if you come along, I'm not your wish.
Here comes Mike Barnacle.
Of impartial moderators, impartial reporters asking questions, the Republicans would lose one of their biggest issues running against the media.
So that's the way Mike Barnacle pushes back a little.
Right, right.
So he kind of makes that point like, ah, you guys like to run against the media.
That's what he's trying to say.
Like, look, you guys are going to lose your biggest.
But he's not contradicting it.
No, he's not saying that.
He's saying that he said, if you guys did have fair and impartial moderators, you would look.
So he's saying you don't.
He's saying you don't have fair enough.
By the way, the day after, we'll talk about, but the day after the CNN debate with the Democrats, Donald Trump tweeted out, hey, great job by Anderson Cooper.
Tough but fair.
And now they're like, what about all those softball questions, Anderson Cooper?
So, and again, guys like Mark Halperin sit there and let it happen because the rich people, he just goes along with who's rich.
That's the insight.
Also, they're all terrified of being accused of being liberal.
They have this like real fear and they go out of their way.
The CNN Democratic debate had you at who like asked one question.
He was only there to prove to everyone that they don't have a liberal bias.
But then at the next CNN debate, did you see at the Democratic debate, did you see Glenn Greenwald there?
No.
No.
Where's Keith Oberman?
Where's Glenn Greenwald?
Where's Rachel Maddow?
Where are the lefty, where's Tom Hartman?
They were actually protesting in the free speech zone down the street.
So just if you go to the comments at Newsbusters about this clip that I just played, the first comment is, Barnacle is an idiot.
If he thinks the Republicans rely on running against the media to their advantage, he hasn't been paying attention, and he's obviously just another one of those Democrats.
Oh, wow.
Unbelievable.
That's the first comment in that.
That's what they sets the table.
The comment, that respond, and that got 91 upvotes.
And the first reply to that comment says, I gave you an upvote after your first four words.
And so now I guarantee you, Mike Barnacle is worried of like, oh, shit, was I too liberal with that completely innocuous statement?
Yes.
I better watch myself next time.
Yeah, plus they want to be rebooked on these shows.
You know, that's what this is because essentially these shows are platforms for their speaking tours, for their books, for other revenue streams that they have.
And this is all about money.
Absolutely.
That's the truth there.
They're terrified of losing that perch.
And, you know, Mark Halpern, in theory, is at the top of his profession.
Yes.
He's like a top.
He's written best-selling books that have been made into movies.
He's, you know, he has high-profile position at Bloomberg News.
If anyone could just call Joe Scarborough out and not worry about consequences, it's him.
But they're so addicted to being on TV and losing his position that he has no choice but to be a complete toady.
So Ben Carson, more Ben Carson.
Thank God.
So Ben Carson's on a book tour.
He's not running for president right now.
He's taking a break.
He's literally taking a break because that's how important running for president is.
He's taking a break to read a book, actually.
He's never done it.
So he's selling a book right now.
Literally, he's not running for president, yet MSNBC is still covering him like he is campaigning.
So listen to what Chris first has.
So Chris Matthews has on a female reporter who's covering Ben Carson's campaign, even though he's not campaigning.
They're still covering him.
Here's what Chris Matthews says about him.
And you tell me if this isn't a little crazy, the way they gush over him.
Star power of the quiet guy who speaks about 33 and a third.
I'm at 78 all the time.
He's at 33 and a third.
So Chris Matthews there is dating himself.
He's talking about how Ben Carson is slower than him.
He's at 33 and a third or 70.
Anyway, that's how records spin.
And yet he's connecting with a lot of voters out there.
Evangelicals, other voters, conservative voters, quieter voters, quieter voters.
Quieter voters.
Quieter voters.
How does he know?
Quieter voters.
Hey, this guy's quiet.
I'm quiet.
I'll vote for him.
What's going on in the campaign trail with him?
Can you see it?
First of all, it's not a campaign.
He's out selling books.
There is no trail.
Second of all, here we go.
We're not even on the campaign trail.
That's the crazy part.
We're on the book tour.
This is the second event I've gone to today.
Thousands of people, some of them who have waited in line, four or five, six.
Six hours, even more.
He gets kind of a rock star reception as he quietly gets off the bus and waves.
A rock star reception.
Ben Carson gets a rock and roll reception from people who hate rock and roll.
He's their modern-day pericomatose.
Okay, this is unbelievable.
Thousands standing in lessons.
Imagine if NBC sent this reporter to a Bernie Sanders event that attracts 20,000 people.
She's blown away by a book signing crowd.
How would this reporter be able to compute a Sanders rally?
I don't think she would be able to.
Literally, she's gushing over a book signing.
I mean, when you talk to them, there are a couple things going on, and it's backed up by our poll.
So when you talk to them, there's a couple things going on.
First of all, it's the whole anti-Washington thing.
We've talked a lot about that.
But it's about his personality as well.
They trust him.
They believe in him.
They think he's honest.
Contrast that, for example, with Hillary Clinton.
The most troublesome number for her in this poll is only 27%.
I'll give her high marks for honesty.
The other thing when you delve into that poll that is really interesting is that he has a 13-point advantage in independence.
You mentioned the people we think he would do well with, you know, the conservatives, the evangelicals, some of the young families.
What's really been interesting to me, Chris, is I've talked to people both on the campaign trail and on the book tour is how diverse they are, diverse.
Did you hear the list of people she says are lining up behind him?
Hang on.
know, the conservatives, the evangelicals, some of the young families.
They're all going for Ben Carson.
Can you believe this gushing that she's doing about Ben Carson?
Yeah, and the idea of the diversity.
Yes, like there's a diverse crowd that's into him.
Right, like that diversity where there is none.
That's the problem with this long election cycle that starts with this Republican race that goes on and on and on, and all these poll numbers that just reflect a Republican base, that evangelical crowd, or those that even that aren't bothered by that.
Win a general election, you're not going to have that.
And that's when Hillary Clinton is going to rise.
Are Hillary Clinton's negatives high?
Of course they are.
Or Bernie Sanders.
But you know what?
A week before Barack Obama soundly defeated John McCain.
John McCain had very high favorables.
It's like kind of meaningless what your favorables and unfavorables are in terms of trustworthiness and all that.
Plus, once you've said about somebody, I love that he's an outsider.
I love that he knows nothing about Washington.
I love that he's out of this system.
Pretty much anything goes at that point.
Now, of course, the next thing is, and I like him.
I trust him.
Yeah, it's the George Bush syndrome.
I want to have a beer with a guy.
Yes.
Yes.
She's got more to say.
It gets worse.
Interesting to me, Chris, as I've talked to people both on the campaign trail and on the book tour, is how diverse they are, diverse in terms of age, in terms of race, socioeconomically.
A lot of, and I think this is a story that's going to be told a lot more coming up.
A lot of them doctors, nurses, medical professionals, people who were inspired to become that profession because they read his book.
And also patients.
He did 15,000 surgeries.
I just met a young man who he removed half of his brain when he was two years old.
And now he has a job.
He rides horses.
How is that guy not going to go out and try to get Ben Carson elected president?
I'll tell you how he doesn't go out and try to get Ben elected president because it only takes half a brain to realize that Ben Carson is a moron.
Nice.
That's why.
That's how that guy does.
He goes, hey, listen, even me with half a brain, I know the stuff you're saying is crazy.
I have a job.
I ride horses.
You know what?
I just want to disagree a little bit with what Mark just said about how people think Ben Carson is the kind of guy they'd like to have a beer with.
I think it's more he's the kind of guy you'd like to have write you a prescription for Viking.
Right.
There's a little more to it.
Do you really think that people that he's a moron?
Because people keep saying how smart he is, how brilliant.
Well, in some ways, he obviously, I mean, there's no denying that he did brain surgery.
That's the crazy thing.
But, you know, you can be a complete ignorant person in terms of the way you view the world and also be really great at a particular thing that you happen to have a great talent for.
Yeah, it's more, it's like he learned a Rubik's Cube.
You don't have to have wisdom or an understanding of anything except how the brain functions and biology to do that.
He's not a moron.
There's mental horsepower there, but he has no abilities to reflect to.
There's something wrong.
Yes.
I mean, there's something wrong, right?
So things don't connect upstairs intellectually for him.
So he has aptitude for like book learning, but you could, you know, it's just like a savant.
He's a savant in that way.
And he can be, you know, there's a lot of people who can't tie their own shoes, but they can play Bach, right?
You know, being a brain surgeon, of course, requires incredible skill and incredible training, but it's just like being a comedian or anything else.
If you're born with an innate talent for it, you're going to be able to do it.
That doesn't mean, you know, think of, you know, people who are great at things and are still idiots about everything else.
It's actually kind of a common thing.
So here she goes.
I played the game operation.
Like, how hard could it be?
How hard could it be?
You know, I think there is a big part of it that started with the malaise or the anger that people feel against Washington, D.C. This is unlike anything we've ever seen before.
Can you listen to this woman?
It's unlike anything.
Yeah, cut to Ben Carson sleeping during one of his speeches.
It's unlike anything we've ever seen before.
This is amazing.
I've ever seen before.
I covered my first presidential election in 1980.
It really is unique to this moment that someone like him can be where he is.
Now, I'll say this.
First of all, there's more energy in her report on him than he has in his own speeches.
Exactly.
Yeah.
This real quickly, his folks know he's going to have to address the experience issue.
He has a line that he uses on the campaign trail that gets a big laugh.
Yeah, I guess he'll address the experience issue, but I guess you don't have time to do that on your news show.
So she's really, she's just covering a book signing.
She's covering a book signing.
This is the longest story on a book signing.
Talk about how amazing it is that a couple thousand people showed up to a book signing.
She said almost exactly the same things when she covered Dave Barry's last book signing.
She's got a little bit of chiz.
You know, it was professionals built the Titanic.
Amateurs built the Ark.
So that's what Ben Carson says when people say you don't have experience, that amateurs built the ark.
And I've heard him say that it's an incredibly stupid thing to say.
And she's not offering any context to the fact that that's what an imbecilic thing it is to say.
It's pretty imbecilive.
For one thing, let me point out one basic flaw in that argument.
The Titanic actually existed.
Yeah.
Yes.
And it hit an iceberg.
There wasn't anything wrong with how they built it.
On this one, I'm going to have to say, though, and I'm not a big supporter of this journalist at all, but I think it's pretty self-evident.
I like that quote as is.
You don't need to explain it to me.
The guy says he compares the Titanic to the building of the Ark.
Okay, case closed.
Thank you.
No more testimony.
I got it.
Hey, guys, he's got just a little bit more to say.
They know that that's a great line on the trail.
They're going to have to work to keep this momentum going.
That's the big question, Chris.
Okay, that's the big question.
Can he keep the momentum going?
Mr. Energy, Ben Carson.
She spent more time covering a book signing than Chris Matthews did interviewing Robert Redford.
Yeah, yes, you are right.
Yes.
Okay, so I just thought that was a little, that's how they're covering a book signing for Ben Carson.
Wow.
I've never seen anything.
He's got everyone supporting him from all walks of life.
It's unbelievable.
What a horrible reporter.
Well, they all are.
You know, I was actually thinking, you know, the Katie Tur, who they interviewed all the time.
Katie Tour.
Katie Tourer, I realized, is basically a hot Luke Russer.
You know?
Oh, yeah.
Now it's time for Rip Torn's Hollywood drunk tank with Rip Torn.
I don't want to.
Gather around, kiddies.
Daddy's drunk and ready to dish.
The New York Post and other outlets are reporting that industry insiders have been doing a bunch of hand-rigging regarding Jimmy Fallon's excessive drinking.
After a spade of odd personal injuries, including a broken finger, sources close to the tonight's show host say his imbibing has gotten out of control.
Welcome to the biz, baby.
We knew you'd drop eventually.
That man boy act of yours is a lot easier to stomach when you know for a fact that he's barely holding it together.
Taking an institution like the tonight show and transforming it into a juvenile, undisciplined circus atmosphere where famous people simply celebrate being famous, dancing around like an idiot, singing dumb songs every goddamn night.
Normally, all this would make me shoot out my LG flat screen.
But knowing he's drunk all the damn time, this is the best fucking shit on TV.
Shout out to Jimmy S. What do you need, sweetie?
Need a buddy?
I'll show you how to take this shit to the next level.
I'll teach you how to have literally no memory of an entire year and not get fired.
After all, you're sitting at Johnny's throne.
Nobody drank like that, maniac.
The job is cursed, I'm telling you.
Leno didn't drink, but every night he went home and had sex with cars or some shit.
There's no way you're walking away from 11:30 unscathed.
So enjoy it, I say.
Have fun watching Jimmy Fallon's drunk ass.
Keep him on Dier and see what happens.
Within five years, it'll just be him with a chronic high twitch doing mini musicals about how all authority figures are heroes.
And a gag segment for female guests called Can the Band See Your Boobs?
At least it's not Carson Daily.
Moving from the peacock to the all-knowing eye, CBS has announced that it will be releasing a new Star Trek television series in 2017.
You and I both know there's a lot more to Rip Torn's Hollywood drunk tank.
We're not even halfway through it.
And if you'd like to hear the rest and his thoughts on the new Star Trek show, also the new Bill Cosby deposition, and a lot more, you got to get the premium episodes.
You got to get the premium content, which you can get for $5 a month over at jimmydoorcomedy.com.
And if you pay for the whole year at once, we give you a month free.
Isn't that something?
And if we've changed the passcode, if you haven't gotten your new passcode, send me an email at jimmydoor at earthlink.net and we'll set you up.
All right, what else is coming up in this week's premium content?
Ben Carson goes nuts.
We take it.
We scrutinize Ben Carson answering questions also.
What's the best way to fix poverty?
The answer just may surprise you, or will it?
Plus, there's a lot more coming up in this week's premium content.
A lot of people had emailed me and Facebooked me and tweeted at me that last week's premium content show was so good that I should have shared it as a regular show.
Well, that's the whole point of premium.
The premium, I try to make it as compelling or more so than the regular show, right?
So those are the people who are in deep.
Those are the people who are down with the show for the cause.
They share the vision.
They get it.
That's what this is all about.
So I appreciate everyone who enjoyed last week's premium content as much as you did.
We did a nice segment on the Afghanistan war, a look back, a look ahead, a look where we are right now, all the craziness.
Plus, Mike from St. Louis called in last week, which is always hilarious.
So go ahead and treat yourself.
Folks, you're worth it.
You are worth a dollar and whatever.
It's less than a cup of coffee a week.
You are worth it.
Okay.
Plus, and guess what?
For sure, we are going to be starting.
We're going to be dropping more premium episodes every week.
So that should entice you.
Okay, we'll let you know more about that as it comes coming soon, maybe this month.
How about that?
Big thanks to my guest, Mark Thompson.
Please check out his podcast, which Steph and I have been a guest on many times.
It's the Edge-Show.com.
Edge.show.com.
Thanks to Mark Thompson for sitting in.
He's always a delight to have on the show.
Okay, that's it for this week.
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