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Aug. 16, 2014 - Jimmy Dore Show
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Get ready for an outstanding entertainment program.
The Jimmy Dore Show.
Hey, so there was another unarmed black kid shot down by a white cop the other day.
Hey, one more, and I think we all get a free pizza.
Fortunately, the all-white police force of Ferguson, Missouri reacted with caution and restraint and worked with the community leaders to ensure that the rights of its citizens to peacefully protest were protected.
It was a good feeling to see redneck Missourians dressed like Rambo and armed to the teeth patrolling Midwestern cities in broad daylight.
I can't help but think that all those Civil War reenactments are coming in handy right now.
So it was especially comforting to see a sniper in full camouflage gear with an assault weapon continuously aimed directly at the people protesters of color.
I knew then that the police were serious about protecting the civil rights of the upstanding citizens of Ferguson and wanted to be ready if anybody there was going to try and interfere with their right to protest peacefully.
That sniper sitting on top of that tank was ready to take out anybody who tried to interfere with democracy.
Unfortunately, the cops aren't perfect and a few reporters got caught up in their peacekeeping activities.
It appears to be the result of the fog of war that so often happens in the middle of the afternoon in a tranquil McDonald's.
Initial reports indicate that while the police officer was trying to secure the reporters' First Amendment rights, they got their heads smashed into a plate glass door and a soda fountain.
Yes, sometimes ensuring freedom is messy.
The other good news is that the Missouri elected officials immediately snapped into action five days later and decided to replace all the white camouflage redneck Rambos with a mixed race group of state police officers who are apparently raised with the ability to feel normal shame.
The bottom line is that an unarmed black thug, probably a gang member, probably on drugs, but definitely black, went crazy and assaulted a cop who was just driving down the street minding his own business.
And he proved to be so dangerous that the officer felt it prudent to unload his entire magazine of bullets into the black attacker, who at the time was running away with his hands up trying to signal his criminal friends to toss him a gun, I'm sure.
But thank God President Obama took to the podium today to say a few mealy mouth things that will have a great amount of zero effect.
I look forward to him getting pummeled by the right-wing media for a few weeks and him eventually apologizing over and over for it.
Hey, breaking news.
MSNBC has issued a blanket apology for everything that's happening right now, including this rant.
APPLAUSE APPLAUSE APPLAUSE MUSIC It's the Jimmy Dore Show.
The show for...
The kind of people that are...
It's the show that makes Anderson Cooper save.
It's hard to talk to you, K-Dog.
And now, here's a guy who sounds a lot like me.
It's Jimmy Dolar!
*Music*
Hi, everybody.
Let's welcome to this week's show.
I'm joined in the studio to my right, my buddy, the host of Turner Classic Movies, the hilarious ranter on the Jimmy Dore show.
It's one and only Ben Mankowitz.
Hey, Ben, how are you?
James.
Well, is your mic not on?
Doesn't seem now it's on.
Oh, now it's on.
It's magic.
Sure, let me try that again.
James.
Ben, great rant last week.
People are talking about it.
It's going to have to hold over.
There isn't one this week.
I got one.
No problem.
Across the glass from me, we have a special guest with us.
We have author Ed Rampell, who's at the new book.
It's called the Hawaii Movie and Television Book, which is out right now, right?
Aloha.
Aloha.
It sure is.
It's a book all about the movies of Hawaii.
We're going to talk to Ed later on in the show.
Across from him, a hilarious comedian, the host of Comedy and Everything Else, and the blog, The Miserable Liberal.
It's Steph Zamarano.
Hey, Steph, how are you?
Hola, Jaime.
Oh, on the phone.
Hilarious comedian from Mystery Science Theater 3000.
It's TV's Frank, Frank Conniff.
Hi, Frank.
How are you?
Hello there.
All right, Frank, how's your new podcast doing well?
Yes, it's Blockbuster.
It's called Drivekiller Has Risen in the Polls.
It's the latest episode of Pod House 90, my anthology of original radio plays.
And I'm just, the money is just pouring in.
Yeah, I know how that podcast money is.
I mean, you combine the world of podcast with the world of original radio plays.
I mean, Jesus, how do you not make money?
I know.
I'm just very crashed with trash when it comes to coming up with commercials.
They're so commercial, yeah.
Wow, you're always...
Were you a marketing major?
Because it sounds like you're a...
I'm just in it.
Anyone who looks in my career knows I just did it for the money.
Yes, you're all about promotion.
You and Carrotop.
Anyway, also with us, sitting in right now, our resident Japanese man, hilarious comedian from Team Yasamura.
It's Robert Yasamura.
Hey, Robert.
Just to be clear, I'm about as Japanese as you are.
I think you're a little bit more.
My parents weren't in an internment camp.
To be fair, just one of my parents was in an internment camp.
Okay, that's fair.
That's still 100% more than me.
Okay.
Fair enough.
Fair enough.
Okay.
Come on.
I got to bump up the ethnicity on this show, Robert.
I can't have freaking six Jew white guys sitting around.
You mean like every other comedy show ever?
That's what I'm talking about because this is public radio.
We got a Latina.
I got a guy from, where are you from?
Armenia.
Armenia?
Glendale?
Mya.
I got you, the Japanese guy.
Go ahead.
My mom's, you know, whole side of the family, Mormon.
Does that help?
Oh, no, not really.
That actually pulls us in the other direction.
That's even whiter than being Jewish.
My parents are black Irish.
Yes, and also, joining us today is we have another very special guest.
We got a full house today.
We have a very special guest, the comedian Ron Babcock, ladies and gentlemen, is here.
Hi, Ron.
How are you?
I'm good, Jimmy.
How are you?
No, Ron, you got a big tour coming up, and we're going to talk about it later in the show.
Tell people real briefly what it is.
I'm driving from L.A. to New York and back in an old vintage Mercedes-Benz.
Yeah.
And I'm going to be doing stand-up along the way in a lot of weird rooms.
Yes, and you're going to be, I guess, videotaping this or what have you.
Are you recording this for people that people can enjoy it?
Oh, yeah.
I'm going to be recording the whole thing and making a little road documentary out of it.
That's fantastic.
We're looking forward to it.
By the way, I point blank told him not to do it.
Yeah, very, and just publicly on a Facebook thread.
Yeah.
You know, in that cheeky, only way Robert Yasimura could do.
Yes, I understand.
He's like, you should, this is going to break down.
This is a bad idea.
I'm like, thanks for the support, Robert.
I say try.
The only good things will come from that.
Okay, so let's get to some jokes before we get to the joke.
Hey, did you hear there's going to be a shake-up over at Meet the Press?
Chuck Todd, Chuck Todd replacing David Gregory.
And it's so exciting to know that Meet the Press might suck just a tiny bit less now.
I don't think so.
I think Chuck Todd's going to suck a little bit more.
You know what?
It'll be interesting to see.
They'll suck in different directions.
Sure.
NBC felt that it was time for a lateral move.
Hey, you know, but Conventional Wisdom issued a statement saying it's quite comfortable with Chuck Todd replacing David Gregory.
That's right from, I follow Conventional Wisdom's Twitter feed.
Hey, by the way, did you hear Joe Morning Joeball?
Joe Scarborough.
Yeah.
He got a little upset about the, he thinks the reporters in Ferguson, I don't know if you saw the reporters in Ferguson, they got roughed up a little bit by the cops there, right?
A couple of reporters.
Yeah.
And so everybody's outraged except Morning Joe Ball.
He was upset.
He said he goes, hey, if I'm a reporter, a cop tells me to leave 13 times, I'm going to get out of there.
That's what he said.
So according to Joe, Morning Joe Ball, journalism never happens on the set of Morning Joe, so it should never happen in Ferguson either.
I personally would go to McDonald's more often if reporters got roughed up there.
I mean, I think that was just the reporters were there at McDonald's for an exclusive interview with Mayor McTree.
How does a guy?
You know, Scarborough said that he thought the Huffington Post reporter and the Washington Post reporter were just there and just engaged in that because they wanted to get on TV.
That's what he said.
Which is amazing considering he's a guy who left Congress just to be on TV.
This is coming from a guy who spends his day sitting in a TV studio with makeup on looking into a camera.
Quit the United States Congress.
He left in the middle of his term to be on TV.
To be on TV.
I thought the cops got a bad rap, though, because they were only there for an anti-obesity sting.
So it's like it just was misreported.
Yeah, it just got cross-purposes.
Yeah, they told him to leave McDonald's and go, like, you know, they were throwing vegetables at him.
Yeah, they're like, there's a farmer's market down the street.
Those are actually Michelle Obama's cops.
By the way, the chief of police for McDonnell Land.
Also a racist.
Yes, also a racist.
Oh, we all know that guy is.
But hey, by the way, Expendables 3, by the way, opening this Thursday, so that's today.
Oh, we got to go start waiting in line now.
I can't wait to miss that.
That's open this week.
But you know what I say?
Haven't we had enough bad news this week?
And by the way, speaking of Ferguson, it's a good thing that the Ferguson police have a huge weapons arsenal and full riot gear to defend the killing of an unarmed black kid because that's what you need when you're going to kill an unarmed black kid.
Okay, what's coming up on today's show?
We're going to talk about Ferguson inside, outside, upside, inside, downside.
The white side, the black side, we're talking about it.
Plus, Megan McCain, she's got something to say about Edward Snowden.
And what is it?
Well, the answer just might surprise you.
Or will it?
Plus, we got phone calls today from one of the lawyers who's filing that lawsuit with John Boehner against President Obama.
We got God calls in today.
And we also got Tuesdays with Moron, plus a lot, lot more.
Wow!
That's today on the Jimmy Dore Show.
you Hey, so Ferguson, Missouri, it's a town of 21,000 residents that went from a tiny black minority to 67% black majority in 40 years.
While the police force remained a minimum of 90% white, which, you know, isn't a recipe for disaster at all.
I mean, it's not like Missouri was part of a compromise that admitted it as a slave state.
Oh, wait a minute.
It was.
So when an unarmed black teen was shot to death, people really weren't that surprised.
And when the black residents of Ferguson protested, no one was terribly surprised about that either, except for the Ferguson Police Department, who, in keeping with their theme of really not understanding the situation at all, have essentially sent in all the Caucasian occupying force.
Eventually, news of Rodney King, evidently, news of Rodney King, never quite reached Missouri, as they say in Missouri.
Yeah, there's nice use of Missouri.
They like to say Missouri, even though it's spelled Missouri.
Yeah.
Right?
I get it.
I say often, and it's spelled often.
Okay, so here, so here's what happened.
So we'll get you cut to the chase.
Here's the guy for the kid who was shot.
Here's his friend, who was Michael Brown.
Michael Brown, the dead black teen, who was definitely guilty of being black and about to start college and a bar to start college.
You're correct.
Oh, wait, I didn't know about that.
Oh, that changes my perspective.
Yes.
It was just technical college.
Yes.
So he was technically.
He was being a pedestrian with intent to go somewhere.
While wearing a black skin.
So he explains what happened, right?
So the cop, these kids are walking in the street.
The cop pulls up next to them, swears at them, which is how cops usually talk to you if you're not a white and in a suit.
They'll say, they swore at him.
He said, hey, get the F off the street and get on the sidewalk.
So one guy did.
The other guy didn't do it fast enough.
And then the cop threw his car into reverse and almost hit these guys.
And here's what happened.
Ready?
Pulled up on the side of us.
He tried to thrust his door open, but we were so close to it that it ricocheted off us and it bounced back to him.
And I guess that, you know, got him a little upset.
And at that time, he reached out the window.
He didn't get out the car.
He just reached his arm out the window and grabbed my friend around his neck and was trying to, as he was trying to choke my friend.
So cop pulls up, drives down the street, swears at these kids.
Two seconds later, throws the car in reverse, starts choking one of them.
Doesn't even get out of the car.
Doesn't even bother to get out of the car.
That seems really lazy to me.
Like, if you're going to rough up an unarmed black teen, get out of the car.
I want to push people around, but from my chair.
Yeah, it's all.
Yeah, what are we paying you for?
So I like it then.
You know what?
The thing is, is don't let store drive-throughs have made him lazy that way.
Yeah, so that's a great point, Frank, because I think we haven't had the name of the cop release.
So I just think we need to go and find the fattest Ferguson police officer and figure that's who did it.
I got to tell you, having looked at the chief of police, that's going to be a tall or so here.
He's got a little.
So by the way, that's exactly, that's not hard for me to believe that that's exactly how it happened.
That the cop just reached out of the thing, started choking this black kid by the neck.
Okay.
So I don't know if you've had any encounters with cops.
I have.
That's how they treat you.
And that's what the, if that is true, that's what the Ferguson police have, in their incredibly limited information, described as the scuffle where the officer was attacked inside his car.
Yeah, he got attacked because you know how happens all the time you know how black guys are rushing at police cars hey there's a cop car let's see if we can jump in it and start fighting the cop in it do you have a gun no maybe i could steal one inside of the car so this is all yeah so anyway so here's a little bit more and he was trying to get away and the officer then reached out and he grabbed his arm to pull him into the car so now it's like the officer's pulling him inside the car he's trying to pull away and at no time the officer said that
And he was going to do anything until he poured out his weapon.
His weapon was drawn, and he said, I'll shoot you, or I'm going to shoot.
And in the same moment, the first shot went off.
And we looked at him.
He was shot, and it was blood coming from him.
And we took off running.
Jesus Christ.
So he shot him inside the car.
Then the kid gets out of the car somehow.
He starts running away.
And so let's hear what happened, right?
His weapon was already drawn when he got out of the car.
He shot again.
And once my friend felt that shot, he turned around, and he put his hands in the air.
And he started to get down.
But the officer still approached with his weapon drawn, and he fired several more shots.
So that's called murder?
That's called murder?
Even if it happened?
Go ahead, Frank.
In Ferguson, that's what's known as letting him off with a warning.
So then the cop, the guy's got his hands up, and he empties his revolver into the kid.
Ten bullets.
It's not a revolver.
It's an automatic.
That's an automatic.
Yes.
Which, by the way, is part of the militarization of police forces.
Part of the militarization of police forces.
Which is part of the problem.
Why are cops carrying ten round clips?
Why?
Why?
When are you going to have to unload ten freaking rounds?
Why is there a tank in Ferguson?
A tank.
We're going to get to that.
So that's what happened.
And if you have any...
And let me just...
I'm just going to read something to you, too, really quickly.
You know what?
And I do want to add that, as of yesterday, they still haven't contacted this young man, I think Mr. Johnson, at all.
The police department hasn't contacted him yet.
The FBI has talked to him.
Talked to him today.
Oh, finally.
Thank God.
Five days later, they're on that investigation.
First of all, there's no investigation needs to be done.
No matter what comes out.
Like, oh, we're waiting for the toxicology reports.
It doesn't matter if that kid was drunk or if the officer was high on cocaine.
It doesn't matter.
He didn't have a gun.
The officer had a gun.
He was surrendering, and the cop shot him.
It doesn't matter if they're both sober.
It doesn't matter if they're both on heroin.
It doesn't matter.
That's what happened.
It's murder.
Even if we take the account that the police force is giving us right now...
Or will give us.
They have already said that this kid was...
He kind of attacked him in the car.
Let's say he did.
Let's say he did.
He didn't.
But let's say he did attack him in the car.
The cop shoots him in the car.
He starts running away.
It's over.
It's over.
That's right.
It's over.
It's over.
Yeah.
So he should have...
And by the way, if that is true, what his friend said, then the initial reports, the incredibly limited deceitful information that the Ferguson police have given, and now we can fully say that these guys are just giant liars throughout.
Yes.
But they...
Because they said there was a shot fired in the car, but essentially indicated that it didn't hit anybody.
Correct.
But he is saying that he was hit once, which would indicate why maybe he was running away.
Yeah.
That would indicate.
Okay.
So let me just...
And let me just quickly take a little sidetrack here.
Because if you think that, hey, this is something that happens to black kids, and it's only a few cops and what have you, just if you think...
This is from a guy named John W. Whitehead, because he wrote a book about this, and it's called The Government of Wolves, and he says, this is just the following are cautionary tales for anyone who still thinks that they can defy police officers, even if it's simply to disagree with them about a speeding ticket or challenge a search warrant or defend oneself against unreasonable and unjust charge without deadly repercussions.
The message they send is that we the people have very little protection from a standing army that is law enforcement.
Here's a couple of quick stories.
In Seattle, police repeatedly tasered a seven-month pregnant woman, Malika Brooks, for refusing to sign a speeding ticket.
While Brooks bears permanent burns on her body from the encounter, police were cleared of any wrongdoing on the grounds that they didn't know that tasering a pregnant woman was wrong.
Not in the manual.
We've talked about this on the show.
Eight Los Angeles police officers fired 103 bullets at two women in a newspaper delivery truck they mistook for a getaway car during a heated manhunt.
The older woman was shot twice in the back, and the other was wounded by broken glass.
The women were offered $4 million settlement for their injuries, while the officers were reprimanded and retrained and put back on the streets.
Officer material.
There you go.
During the course of a routine investigation, a group of Los Angeles police officers beat, punched, and tasered Kelly Thomas, a schizophrenic homeless and suspected of vandalizing cars.
They beat him until he was brain dead.
The two officers charged for their role in the beating were acquitted and will face no prison time.
New York police, pursuing a man who had reportedly been weaving among cars in Times Square, fired into a crowd, shooting a 54-year-old woman in the knee and another woman in the butt.
Although the officers faced no repercussions for their reckless behavior, prosecutors charged the suspect with felony assault on the grounds that he was responsible for the injuries caused by the police.
I'll give you one more.
Chicago police arrested and beat and sodomized with a gun Angel Perez, pushing in his eye sockets, driving his elbow back into his head and sticking a gun in his rectum, all in an effort to persuade him to be a drug informant.
All the officers remain on active duty.
Houston police shot and killed Brian Clownch, a mentally ill double amputee who refused to drop his ballpoint pen.
The police officer was cleared of any misconduct and remains on the force.
Curiously, in the last six years, the Houston Police Department has yet to find a single police shooting unjustified.
Between 2007 and 2012, the Houston Police Department officers injured 111 civilians while failing shooting 109 people, all of them justified.
Well, to be fair, it's Houston.
I mean, you get what you get if you live there.
So this is not a couple of bad cops, okay?
People always say, I saw it today on Facebook all over the place.
Hey, this is 2% of the cops and 98% of the cops are good.
Which is nice when people just pull stats out of their ass for no, they just pull it out of their ass.
Because let me tell you, this isn't about good cops or bad cops.
All cops are pretty much the same.
They get into being cops because they dig it.
That's why they're cops and not firemen or EMTs or teaching little kids, oh, they want to help their community.
Then why don't you go out and teach little kids to read?
Or why don't you go out and become a fireman?
That's not.
So this is what, and I'm not saying we don't need cops or some of my friends aren't cops.
My family's full of cops.
this stuff not one of them became a cop because they gave a crap about their community they became a cop because they dig it that's why cops are cops and we're not we're not cops because we don't get off on it okay so just so you know and there's a culture in this country right now it started with the drug i read about it last we read that rant Last week, it started with the drug war, and then after 9-11, it totally went crazy, right?
So, cops, and by the way, cops crack the heads of peaceful protesters every day.
From New York to Los Angeles and everywhere in between during Occupy Wall Street, union cops crack the head of unemployed, peaceful protesters at the behest of billionaire bankers.
And that's who they are, okay?
So, let's not forget they don't care about your rights.
They're not there to protect the Constitution.
They're due to get off on power that we need to have.
So, let's keep that in mind.
I mean, and when you say it's mostly good cops and only a couple of bad cops, that stops the conversation that we need to have.
And the conversation that we need to have is why are cops driving tanks and wearing camouflage in the streets of Midwest America?
Why is it that when the cops show up, you know violence is going to be escalated and not de-escalated?
It's never de-escalated.
It always goes the other way.
Anything to say about the militarization of the police department, anybody?
Yes.
Yes.
I think, I mean, I think if Eisenhower are alive today, I think the first thing he would do is amend his final speech and say that the military-industrial complex will also come for community policing.
And if you want an example of that, go and look at there's a book about the Glock Firearm that talks about how that firearm manufacturer basically Jedi mind-tricked every police force in this country into buying Glocks.
And they happily did it.
Yes.
And so what's happened is that police forces have become pawns of a military industrial complex.
Yes.
So those cops in Ferguson, Missouri were driving what they call a Marbak.
I think that's how you pronounce it.
Yes.
It's designed to go over landmines.
You could go over a landmine with it.
Wait, land mines or land mimes?
No, landmines.
Oh, okay.
I thought you were talking about the circus performance.
Oh, I know.
No, no, no.
No, no.
Which are equally just as offensive.
No, it doesn't have protection against those.
Okay.
Yeah, no one does.
No, you could perform Del Arte in front of them.
So it won't break through the invisible walls that they built.
I know, I thought that guy in the LeBron James t-shirt might have sort of mined the intersection there.
Oh, I see what you're saying.
It's a good possibility.
Let me just say, so the Marvak didn't exist before the Iraq war.
It was developed during the Iraq war specifically to deal with IEDs.
Really?
That is how intense a machine this thing is.
You know a lot of stuff.
No, that's good information.
That is amazing, right?
And so now it went that quickly from the battlefield to the mess because what happens, and this is, oh, this is so infuriating.
But basically, when arms dealers, arms designers build a gun, build a tank, build whatever, they are selling it to the government almost at cost.
Oh, okay.
Okay.
So what they do is they immediately turn around and see if they can find a civilian market for it.
That's why the Hummer became a thing.
That's why handguns such as the Beretta M9 became so popular in the civilian market.
Really?
And the reason is specifically because that development costs a lot of money.
They're recouping as much profit as they can out of those designs.
But, you know, it's not, I mean, I get that the development costs some amount of money.
This is not a cancer drug that needs to be taken through years of trial.
I mean, the Beretta 9, it was not completely dissimilar from the Beretta 8.
I know that wasn't it, but I mean, it's still gun technology that was already kind of in place.
You're absolutely right.
I think they should get rid of the Beretta 9.
And that's the name of that, too.
You're mixing telescopalis, I think.
You know, I just want to highlight, I was reading.
I was reading this article that's highlighting the different ways that we're militarizing our country.
Yeah.
And I thought this was really interesting because they highlighted how a recent New York Times article by Matt Apuzo reported that in the Obama era, police departments have received tens of thousands of machine guns, nearly 250,000 ammunition magazines, thousands of pieces of camouflage, which we're seeing in Missouri.
Yes.
And night vision equipment and hundreds of silencers.
Silencers.
Armor cars.
Silencers.
And aircraft.
And they go on to say, the result is that the police agencies around the nation possess military-grade equipment, turning officers who are supposed to fight crime and protect community into what looks like invading forces from an army.
And military-style police raids have increased in recent years, with one count putting the number at 80,000 such raids last year.
And what they ultimately are doing is they're transforming neighborhoods into war zones.
Yes.
And these neighborhoods turn out to be people of color.
Isn't that interesting?
And you know, when I see those guys dressed in their camo in the middle of a city in broad daylight and camouflage, what are you supposed to?
That's built for the desert and the jungle.
You're supposed to, you're going to blend into the Starbucks?
What are you doing?
You're in the middle of a city.
You're blending into the tank.
Is that a guy?
Is that a, oh, I thought, I thought that was a Union 76.
Turns out it's a cop.
Did you see what the two reporters, one was a Huffington Post reporter, one was a Washington Post reporter, the Huffington Post reporter said the cops who harassed them and arrested those guys in the McDonald's, he called them little boys who like to play dress up.
Like that's what they were doing.
That's who they are.
Yeah, that's who they are because you give them this stuff, you give them, forget the weapons, you give them the clothes, but also you give them the weapons, you give them the tank, and it's like, you know, if you're a hammer, everything looks like a nail.
And these guys, you know, I got to use this.
We got to use it.
We got to use it.
What are they going to do?
Just sit on it and wait for an al-Qaeda strike that might never come?
It's like they're the village people, but with only the police.
So can I give you an example?
Because, well, here's a good example of the militarization.
When there was a Hollywood shooting when I first moved here about 18, 20 years ago, there's a Hollywood shooting, guys wearing body armor.
I had never heard of that ever happening.
I've never heard of it happening ever since.
Yeah, was that Bank of America and North Hollywood?
We all watched it on television.
Was that the whole like that heat was based on?
That's right.
The police chief at the time, the first response he had after that was, well, we're going to get these M16s so that we could defeat.
Yeah.
And now pretty much every police car has an M16 in it.
Well, let me tell you, an M16 can't defeat that body armor.
Right.
But sure looks cool, man.
Sure looks like a badass thing.
Yeah, when I was growing up, my favorite show was SWAT.
And I get that there should be a SWAT team.
There should be a paramilitary unit of the Los Angeles Police Department, of which there are, I don't know, 28 members, you know, and they get a cool van with a super communication center.
Yeah, lightning bolts on the side and stuff.
And Chicago can have one, and D.C. can have one, and New York can have one.
But you've got to go pretty far down the list before Ferguson, Missouri gets a SWAT team.
They don't need a SWAT team.
The whole point of SWAT, which I also know from watching the TV show and the movie, is that it's an elite part of the police.
That's right.
In other words, it's a small portion of the police who are.
Highly trained.
And the SWAT people in, you know, in those, in that TV show, the whole point is they don't want to use sports.
*music*
Okay, we got a lot of funny sketches coming up in the second half.
Phone calls from the lawyer suing President Obama and a lot lot more.
We'll be right back in one minute.
This is the Jimmy Doer Show on Pacifica.
Hey, thanks to everybody who thinks about us when they buy something from Amazon.com.
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Now let's get back to the second half.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Welcome back to the Jimmy Door Show.
We got a lot of great comedy sketches coming up in the second half for you.
Today we got Tuesdays with more on us coming up.
We get a phone call from the lawyer suing President Obama with John Boehner over his enforcement of the Obamacare Act.
Plus, God calls in.
That's right.
The Almighty Himself calls in.
I'm joining the studio today.
We have a full house.
Frank Connant from Mystery Science Theater 3000 is with me.
Ben Mankowicz from Turner Classic Movie is here.
Also, we have comedian Robert Yasamura, Steph Zamorano, the host of Comedy and Everything Else.
Ron Babcock, the hilarious comedian Ron Babcock is with us.
Plus, Ed Rampell, the author of the new big Hollywood movie book.
Okay, so let's get back to the studio and we're talking about Ferguson, St. Louis.
But first, hey, guess what?
We got a phone call from the lawyer suing the president with John Boehner.
Okay, so John Boehner suing the president.
I called the office of the legal team that is on John Boehner's legal team, suing the president.
And let's see if we can talk to this guy right now.
Good morning.
It's a great day to believe in the Constitution.
Hey, this is Jimmy Door.
Who am I speaking with?
All right, you got George Lundemeyer from the great state of Minnesota, assistant to deputy legal counsel to the speaker of the House of the United States.
God bless him, Merrick.
Well, I'm calling from the Jimmy Door show in Los Angeles.
Ooh, exciting.
And Georgie, I was hoping to talk to someone about this lawsuit.
Well, Jimmy, I'll tell you.
You're going to have to take me because I'm the only one here.
Okay.
Is this the whole speaker's speaker's office?
Yep.
Two weeks ago, everyone suddenly shouted, recess, threw me the keys, and ran out the door.
I figure they'll come back at some point.
But until then, I'm pretty much the speaker of the house.
I'm pretty sure that's not how it works.
Pretty sure it is, Jimmy.
Pretty sure you're on the line with the third in line to be the president right now.
You know, I don't think so.
Well, as someone who just spent six years in Regent University Law School, I think I know a little something about this.
Is that Pat Robertson's law school?
Well, we like to think of it as Jesus' law school.
Jesus had been an attorney in addition to his career in carpentry.
Wasn't Jesus directly in opposition to many of the legal professionals in his lifetime?
You're just in my words around.
Why would you do that?
Sergi, I'm sorry.
Now, just to be clear, you are a lawyer.
I don't want to brag, but yeah, someone passed the Minnesota bar exam on his third try.
Which is.
And you're really the only one there?
Well, how else could I be naked and playing Minecraft in a federal building?
Well, I'm trying to understand this lawsuit against the president.
Like, what is the basis for this lawsuit?
Well, Jimmy, it seems that El Presidente has not been following El Constitution.
Oh, and the people are not going to stand for it.
In what way has the president not followed the Constitution?
Well, there are things written in the Constitution that he did not do.
Well, my understanding was that Speaker Boehner is suing over the president's failure to enforce certain provisions of the Affordable Care Act.
Really?
Hey, that sounds weird.
I know.
I mean, we don't even like Obamacare, so why would we sue the president to enforce it?
I know, but I swear this is true.
Well, you learn something new every day.
Aren't you in the council's office?
I mean, aren't you working on this lawsuit?
Yeah, but we really haven't gotten past the whole, we're selling the president's thing.
I see.
But I mean, that's a pretty exciting phase, you gotta admit.
We're selling the president.
Jesus Christ.
It just seems like a stunt to appease the far right.
The case wouldn't.
Georgie, the case wouldn't even be through the courts by the time President Obama left office anyway.
Yeah, but the next president would know, hey, you better enforce Obamacare or else, wait, what?
Al, what?
Georgie, aren't you a fiscal conservative, a small government guy?
Oh, sure am, as if Ronald Reagan molested me himself.
Then doesn't it bother you that all the money and time and resources would be wasted on something that will likely go nowhere?
Jimmy, you're confusing me.
Stop it.
Well, Georgie, this has been no help whatsoever.
That's how we do it.
I actually think I know less for having talked to you.
It's morning in America, Jimmy.
Well, thanks, Georgie.
Follow me on Instagram and Twitter.
Don't forget the Twitter.
Okay, that was our legal guy suing the president with John Boehner.
Georgie from the law offices of the guy who's suing the guy.
Where did he go to law school?
He went to Regent Regent.
Six years there.
That's good.
Six years at Regent.
You got to know your stuff after six years.
Jim Robertson.
Yeah, damn right.
The Jimmy Door show is available as a podcast for free on iTunes.
Or for other ways to subscribe, go to JimmyDoorComedy.com.
And while you're There, you can listen to past episodes and you can comment on them too.
Remember, Jimmy spells his last name, D-O-R-E, jimmydorecomedy.com.
Thank you.
I'm sitting here right now with the author of the new book.
It's called the Hawaii Movie and Television Book.
It's celebrating 100 years of film production throughout the Hawaiian Islands.
And you can't believe all the movies and stuff that has been filmed in the Hawaiian Islands.
I'm here with the one and only Ed Rampell.
Hey, Ed, how are you?
Aloha.
Thanks for having me on.
No, Ed, tell people about what should people know about the Hawaii movie and television book.
First of all, it's a beautiful book.
Got a great lot of pictures in there.
Of all the famous movies you know, Jurassic Park shot in Hawaii, right?
Tora Torotora.
Of course it was shot in Hawaii.
There's a movie called Mr. Roberts shot in Hawaii, Bird of Paradise.
Hawaii 5-0, of course, shot in Hawaii.
Kojak.
From here to Eternity, shot in Hawaii.
Right.
Strangely enough, Ice Station Zebra shot in Hawaii.
So Ed, tell everybody what should they know about this book.
Well, it's a sequel book to the original one that we came out with in 1995.
So what we have here is just about everything that's been on TV or on the big screen that's been shot on location in the Hawaiian Islands or set at Hawaii since 1995.
And the book was actually Alexander Payne's idea.
Okay.
Because he said to me, well, if you do a sequel, you could put the descendants in it.
Ah.
No, he was the guy who said, give me liberty or give me death.
Now, a different guy.
Thomas Payne, and he didn't say that either.
It was Patrick Henry.
Oh, that's right.
I was right.
Mixed metaphor.
Okay.
Pat Henry was the comedian and yourself is.
Yeah, and you know, Frank Sinatra won his Academy Award for From Here to Eternity, which and he did look great in an Aloha shirt.
Oh, so that's from Harry Eternity shot in Hawaii?
Almost entirely shot on location.
Really?
Yeah, it's a wonderful film.
Very anti-military in a lot of ways.
I think it won like eight Academy Awards, Best Picture, Best Director, Fred Zinneman, and so on.
And it is Donna Reed won the Oscar playing a hooker before the Donna Reed show.
Yeah, Sinatra.
She also played a hooker in the Donna Reed show, but nobody talks about that.
That's right.
That's right.
And Montgomery Clift was in it.
Burt Lancaster makes out with Deborah Carr.
Ernest Borgnine?
Yeah, Ernest Borgnine was Oscar-nominated.
Who does he make out with?
He kills Frank Sinatra.
Yeah.
Yeah, Ethel Berman.
I used to, when I would interview Sinatra, he would say that whenever he'd be shooting a movie in Brooklyn for years and years afterwards, Italian guys would come up to him and they'd start giving him a hard time because he was the guy who killed Sinatra.
Ah, really?
Yeah, but he spoke Italian, so he'd always sort of ended up sharing drinking and eating pizza together.
Go ahead, Frank.
Another interesting anecdote is that Eli Wallach just died recently, as you know.
And the only reason Frank Sinatra played that part in the movie is because Eli Wallach was committed to doing a Tennessee Williams play.
Wow.
Otherwise, it would have been Eli Wallach in that part.
Did not know that.
It's hard to remember that at that time in Frank Sinatra's career, he was like on a real down cycle.
He needed that role.
He fought really hard for that.
That's right.
Yeah.
He was like Robin Williams going back to TV.
A little bit, actually.
And the only reason Sinatra got that part was because Luca Broxy made an offer.
Actually, Sinatra was on location in Africa because Ava Gardner was making snows of Kilimanjaro.
And he actually flew back all the way from Africa in like 1952-53 to do a screen test.
And you got to admit that as Maggio, Sinatra's magic.
He's perfect in that part.
And Montgomery Clift is unbelievable.
And Burt Lanka, I mean, it's just like really great acting.
And they had the support of the U.S. military.
They let them shoot at the actual military base where the story was set.
It was written by James Jones, who had served there at Oahu.
And it leads up to, of course, the sneak attack on December 7th, 1941.
Or as my people call it the day things got tricky.
Exactly.
Okay, so now, so this book covers everything that was shot since 1995 in Hawaii.
And a few highlights of before then.
Okay, it looks a great book.
It's, you know, it's a, you would call it a coffee table book, right?
Absolutely.
Kona Coffee.
Kona Coffee.
That's with a K. And so people can pick it up.
And where is it available?
Is it bookstores?
Well, Larry Edmonds in Hollywood on Hollywood Boulevard.
They're carrying it.
Of course, you could go to our publisher, Mutual Publishing.
You could go to their website, Amazon.com.
Oh, Amazon has it too?
Okay.
Absolutely.
Okay, now.
Okay, now let's get back to the studio where I'm joined by Frank Conner from Mystery Science Theater 3000, Ben Mankiewicz from Turner Classic Movies, Ron Babcock, hilarious comedian Rob Babcock from Heyron.com.
Robert Yasamura, hilarious comedian from Team Yasamura, and Step Sam Murano, a host of Comedy and Everything Else.
We're talking about, of course, Ferguson.
So now let's get back to the studio.
So here is Ferguson's.
By the way, here is the autopsy.
They did an autopsy.
And here's a, well, here's a little news report about it.
Gina, thanks.
A preliminary autopsy released today said Michael Brown died of multiple gunshot wounds, but it didn't specify the number of shots.
They won't tell us.
They won't even tell.
Not only are they.
That's not a report.
That's not a report.
You know it's high.
If they don't tell you the number, the number's not going to be two.
Okay, it's going to be nine.
I think it's 10.
So I think it was his whole clip.
I guarantee you, there's Ferguson Police.
They've established something.
He missed.
Yeah.
So it was 10 clips, 10-round clip.
Okay, here we go.
And said toxicology tests would take at least four weeks.
So why do you have to wait for the toxic call again?
Like I said earlier, he's got lead poisoning.
Megan, go ahead and get that.
It turns out he had gouts.
Ferguson's police chief says he'll no longer release the name of the officer who shot Brown.
He says he'll only divulge the name if the officer is charged or if he's ordered by a judge.
Or if he gets 5,000 likes on Facebook.
It's like a social media thing, which is actually pretty smart when you think about it.
And by the way, that's against the law.
They're not releasing the officer's name who's involved in a criminal activity.
It's against the law.
That's against the law.
It's against Missouri law.
You have to release the name.
You can't have people doing policing in secret.
You have to know who they are.
Yeah, that's part of the job.
You can't have cops in secret shooting people in your city.
So are you telling me that you can, like, so if they don't release the name, like, what about cops who want to shoot people?
I know that's that's a problem, right?
If you release The names.
No cops are going to get to shoot anybody.
Right.
Okay, so I don't know why you're disincentivizing this.
So here is Ferguson's police chief, Thomas Jackson, on Wednesday.
And by the way, Thomas Jackson sounds like could be a cool black guy.
Not whitest guy you ever saw, right?
He's a couple of shades whiter than Frank.
And so here's Ferguson police chief.
That's pretty white.
Thomas Jackson on Wednesday after the protest had gone on for three days.
Okay, so he's overweight.
He's slightly sunburned, middle-aged white guy wearing a police uniform addressing this particular situation.
And he explains absolutely nothing.
And so here, we're going to listen to a little bit of his press conference that he had.
There's not a curfew.
Oh, they asked him about a curfew, right?
Because he's like, hey, people are talking about, is there going to be a curfew?
Because we heard that you guys wanted a curfew.
There's not a curfew.
There's no curfew.
No, I don't know where that came from.
You don't know where that came from?
We'd like the protesting to end at dark, just because it's, as you probably know, it's just been unsafe after dark.
But there is no curfew.
We just like it to end at dark because after dark, we're going to start shooting you.
Yeah.
So, but there is no curfew.
Do whatever you want.
We're going to throw stun grenades.
We're going to shoot stear gas right in your face.
And we'll probably be the shit of you if we come close to you.
But other than that, no curfew.
You have constitutional rights until you use them.
Yes, exactly right.
That's what they're there.
So he's like being, he's like trying to be a cool parent.
Yeah, you can express your centuries of anger just as long, just as long as you do it within these hours.
He's like committing cool paternalism, right?
I think there's a banker's hours part to the First Amendment, but that's like this part that nobody reads.
He wants his police force to win daytime in the award.
There's another, also worth noting that there's a long history in America of what is called sundown towns.
Right.
That is towns in which being black after dark, super dangerous, right?
But there's no way that angry black protesters might react badly to a de facto curfew, right?
But fun fact, did you know that the motto of the Ferguson Police Department is don't even try to understand the people you are protecting and serving?
In Latin, it sounds better.
It barely fits on the car.
Yeah.
It actually goes onto the back door.
It's awkward.
Yes.
So, and then, so then there was a state senator who was also part of the protest.
She got gassed, right?
She was being a three peaceful protester.
She's black, right?
And she's black.
Well, there's a problem.
I mean, that's the problem, right?
I mean, you know what?
Her fault, huh?
Heat-seeking tear gas.
New.
So here we go.
She asked the cop.
She asked the police chief.
I just want to know if I'm going to be gassed again like I was yesterday.
And he's probably going to give a professional.
Watch this profound, profound response.
And I was peaceful.
You state senator.
I know.
I know.
She says I was peaceful, and I'm your state senator.
Yeah, I know.
I know.
I got it.
Uh-huh.
And we couldn't get out, and we were peacefully sitting.
I just want to know if I'm going to be gassed.
I hope not.
Outrageous.
Listen, lady, honestly, 50-50 at this point.
I mean, I don't know, you know?
Hey, it's not like you're in charge or anything.
Yeah, that's real leadership.
Listen, I want to say no, but to be honest, it's going to be yes.
He could ensure that it wouldn't happen, but go ahead.
We'll see.
We'll see, honey.
Right, right, right, right, right.
You think the fog of war comes from all that tear gas?
Probably.
Ah, very good.
Yes.
You know, it's, you know, sure, he said, well, I hope not.
Of course, he could ensure not, but unless, of course, your words say exactly what your body language seems to be saying, which is, I hope not.
But honestly, this police force has gotten totally out of control.
I don't know what we were thinking given these crackers, badges, and guns.
You're lucky we don't shoot you right now.
Hey, not for nothing, but gassing their own state senator is only one of the glaring acts of idiocy committed by the Ferguson police since shooting an unarmed teen.
For example, they also arrested and sort of rubbed up two prominent journalists who shockingly reported on the incident.
I know, can you believe it?
And guess what?
The reporters described the police as kind of dicks.
Well, color, my mind blown.
Meanwhile, across town, the Ferguson Fire Department got a cat out of the tree by shooting it.
Joining me now on the phone, we got a very special guest.
It's God.
God, thanks for stopping by.
I know it's busy.
Time for you.
Hello, are you there, Margaret?
It's me, God.
No, I'm not Margaret.
It's me.
It's Jimmy Doer, God.
Oh, I don't know.
I'm just messing with you.
As any biblical scholar will tell you, there's nothing God loves more than ripping on pop culture references.
Anyway, how's it hanging, Jimmy?
It's going good, God.
And I want to thank you for coming back on the show.
It's been a while.
Well, I've been busy.
I'm always just so swamped during end time.
We're in end times?
Oh, hell yeah.
Haven't you seen the ads for Hobby Lobby's end time sale?
Logan, everything must go.
Our prices are so low, we're practically aborting our inventory.
Wow.
So what's bringing on these end times exactly, God?
Oh, you know the usual thing, a violent military conflict that pretends Armageddon.
In the Mideast?
No, the Midwest.
Ferguson, Missouri.
Oh, right, right.
I got it.
Okay.
You know, it's funny.
I always thought the siege of humanity's destruction would come not from Ferguson, Missouri, but from Branson, Missouri.
Any place that gives Yakov Smearloff his own theater would be ground zero for a global Holocaust.
Wow, God, you make a pretty good point, but tell me, what exactly is going on in Ferguson?
Well, Jimmy, it's regrettable.
But as I said in the Bible, let he here who is without sin be the first to shoot an unarmed black teenager.
You know, I don't remember that part of the Bible.
Well, I paraphrase.
But let's not forget that Michael Brown was without a gun, but he was not without sin.
What do you mean?
Jesus Christ, he was jaywalking.
And he deserved to be shot dead for that, God.
Jimmy, traffic signals are there for a reason.
If you just start walking across the street, willy-nilly, the entire fabric of society will fall apart.
You know, I'm sorry, God, but I think Michael Brown's death was actually senseless.
And you're complaining to me about senseless death?
Have you ever experienced a tornado, hurricane, or earthquake?
Senseless death is what I'm all about.
I know I sound like a nice guy over the phone, but look at the record.
I am one strict, vindictive motherfucker.
Well, that certainly is true.
But, God, I wanted to thank you for coming on my show.
Oh, I'm happy to do it, Jimmy.
You remember how Mother Teresa used to take care of lepers?
Well, coming on your show in conference to that.
Well, I appreciate it, God.
Thank you very much.
Thank you, Jimmy.
And everyone, please be sure to catch the expendable free.
God, what the hell are you doing?
It's called sponsored content, Jimmy.
All right, that was God, everybody.
God says Missouri.
God says Missouri.
Yeah.
Yo, I got a phone call.
Let's see who's on the line.
Hello, who's this?
Hey, Jimmy, how are you doing?
It's moron.
Hey, moron.
I haven't heard from you in a while.
How are things going, buddy?
Well, Jimmy, you know me.
I'm easily manipulated to vote against my own interest, and I always follow my leaders unless they happen to be a Democrat or a black.
You do indeed.
But it turns out I do follow a Democrat and a black.
What do you mean, moron?
Well, get this.
I just discovered that I've been suckered into being part of Obama's scam to get him impeached.
How did he do that?
Well, I found out that Democrats came up with the idea of impeaching President Obama's because Sean Hannity's told me that it was like a Michael Vallion planned to get support from Democratic voters.
It's what kind of a plan?
A Michael Vallium.
I think he was the Irish political philosopher who invented Valium.
I think you mean Machiavelli.
He was Scottish.
I've been bamboozled into supporting President Obama's by calling for his impeachments.
And so is my uncle Ned, and my mother-in-law's Gladys and my next-door neighbor, Willie.
That's a lot of bamboozled people.
Obama did the Jedi mind trick on all of us, Jim.
Yeah, but this doesn't make sense because, you know, Barack Obama doesn't need votes because he's not up for election.
He's already been elected to a second term.
Therese, get me a goddamn razor blade and a fucking hot water or getting that fucking impeach Obama thing off my bumper before people think I'm a stooge.
Oh, that was a quick one.
That was a quick Tuesdays with moron.
Look at that.
I don't know.
He had something.
He did call back.
Oh, he did call back.
Let's see what he had to say this time.
Son of a bitch, he did call back, but that's in this week's premium content.
And how do you get the premium content?
You go over to JimmyDorkomedy.com.
You click on premium, you make your $5 donation, or you save yourself $5.
You pay for the year all at once.
It's $55.
That's how you save yourself $5.
And then we send you a passcode.
We just changed the passcode this last week, so getting a lot of emails from people saying they haven't gotten the new one.
We sent them out via email, so check your email if you haven't gotten it.
Send me an email over at jimmydork at earthlink.net.
JimmyDoor at earthlink.net, my old-timey email.
And we'll get you the passcode, okay?
If you're all up to date with the everything.
Okay, so thank you very much.
I'll see you guys August 28th at Vromans in Pasadena, 7 p.m. book signing, okay?
And by the way, there's a lot more to our conversation about Ferguson.
I realize that this situation is fluid, to say the least.
So it was nice to see on Friday night that the state police took over and it was much better seen.
And turns out, wow, that's St. Louis County and Ferguson just abject dumb, right?
Anyway, so thank God for that state police guy.
And he's very smart and knows how to police.
So that's a much better thing to be talking about.
Very much happy that scene turned around a little bit.
Anyway, of course, the release of the video of him, I tweeted out today, they released a video of him with the stealing those cigars.
And then the police chief had to acknowledge that those two things were not related, the killing and the cigar stealing.
And I tweeted that the is it wrong to quote your own tweets?
Anyway, so what I said was, it's nice to see that the Ferguson cops have stopped killing unarmed black kids and just assassinating their character.
Anyway, so that's that was kind of crazy.
That Ferguson police.
Wow.
Anyway, so okay, so that's it for this week.
And I want to say thanks to everybody, everybody who helped out of the show.
Ed Rampel, Ron Babcock, Frank Conniff.
Let's see.
Why am I having Robert Yasabura, Steph Samurano, and Ben Mankowitz?
Why was I having a hard time remembering the people on my own show?
Okay.
And The Voice of God played by, you know, it was Frank Conniff.
And Rod Babcock played the lawyer.
Okay.
And then Tuesdays with Moron, huh?
And there's some of that in the premium.
So go get that.
It's $5.
Treat yourself.
Okay.
So, guess what?
That's it for this week.
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