All Episodes
Previous Next
July 12, 2014 - Jimmy Dore Show
01:03:54
20140712_The_Jimmy_Dore_Show_7-11-14
| Copy link to current segment

Time Text
Get ready for an outstanding entertainment program.
The Jimmy Dore Show.
Last Friday was the 4th of July, the day set aside for celebrating America's independence from tyranny by cooking meat outdoors and setting off Chinese-made explosives.
And in Muriat of California, they celebrated by trying to preserve our great nation's indigenous bigotry demographic.
Yes, on the holiday marking the birth of a nation of immigrants, American patriots gathered to make sure new immigrants never became Americans.
Because after stinging defeats in the last two presidential elections, this seems to be all the outreach to Latino voters that the Tea Party can muster, lining the roadways with angry white GOP activists screaming at Hispanic children fleeing horrific violence in their home countries.
What have the children of immigrants ever done for America anyway, except everything?
Just remember, whatsoever you do to the least of my brothers is okay if they're brown and poor and you are white in America.
The thing is, the GOP forgets that every immigrant child is a potential Republican, a descendant of immigrants who hates immigrants.
For these people, it's all about the rule of law.
Immigrants need to be prosecuted.
Not the companies that exploit immigrants.
Those companies are just victims in all this.
It's the rule of law.
You know, the law that said white people could illegally immigrate to America and kill the red people and take their country?
That law.
Come on, this is America, land of white people, and always has been.
Not a country of Hispanics and God forbid Mexicans.
How we ever got a state named New Mexico is beyond me.
The bottom line is we are told that the United States can't handle this humanitarian crisis at its border.
And I say if it's really a crisis at the border, how come we haven't bombed the border?
We can't handle this humanitarian crisis at the border because we're broke.
Yeah, it's weird that we're never too broke to take a decade out of time and spend trillions of dollars on illegal wars.
We're never too broke to spend trillions on bank bailouts every month giving $50 billion to the criminals on Wall Street who crashed our economy.
No, no, no.
We always have enough money for that stuff.
But things do get a little tight when it comes to helping people without dropping bombs on them.
So hats off to you, Marietta, California.
Thanks for protecting America from the evil of poor children fleeing violence in their home country.
If it weren't for brave souls like you, America just might turn into a nation of filthy immigrants.
All right.
All right.
It's the Jimmy Door Show.
The show for...
The kind of people that are...
It's the show that makes Anderson Cooper save.
It's hard to talk to you about you.
And now, here's a guy who sounds a lot like me.
It's Jimmy Dore.
Hi, everybody.
Welcome to this week's show.
I am joined in the studio right next to me, hilarious comedian from the Rubin Report on the CYT Network.
It's Dave Rubin.
Hey, Dave, how are you, buddy?
Jimmy, it's always good to be here.
I'm excited today, particularly because you're just back from vacation, so I feel the funny already.
I feel you've been doing regular things with regular people in the middle of the country.
Does it get much more regular than the middle of Indiana outside?
Yeah, so I feel good.
I feel good.
I'm ready to do whatever you need me to do.
Okay, I'm excited.
On the phone all the way from New York City from Mystery Science Theater 3000.
It's TV's Frank.
Frank Conniff is with us.
Hi, Frank.
Hello there.
Yay.
Frank, how's the summer in New York City?
It's hot and muddy.
Have you gone to see Sharknado yet?
I have not.
Have you seen the trailer?
Oh, I did see the trailer, and it had kind of an ironic and winking and self-aware sound that I found really surprising.
Across the glass from me, hilarious comedian from Team Yasamura.
It's Robert Yasamura.
Hey, Robert, how are you?
The better for your asking, James.
All right, good.
By the way, you said the middle of Indiana?
Yes.
I just assumed Indiana was all middle.
I didn't know that there was a specific.
There are edges of it, too.
There are edges.
Across from him, hilarious comedian and host of Comedy and Everything Else, it's our resident Latina.
It's Steph Zamarano.
Hey, Steph.
Hey, Jimmy, I'm a Mexican, and I've got a lot to say, all in English today.
I like the fact that your regular prescription glasses are broken, and so you have this litany of drugstore glasses that you keep putting on as if they're not all hilariously ridiculous.
Okay, it's Steph Zabarado.
Thanks.
All right, let's get to some jokes before we get to the jokes.
Hey, by the way, Doctor Who, I don't know if you're a fan of Doctor Who, but their new script got leaked for the new Doctor Who.
Yeah, and you know, if I want my viewing of the episodes to be less enjoyable, I'll guess I'll just have to read them.
By the way, did you hear that Britney Spears?
Oh, yeah.
You hear about this?
I did.
So someone led a track of her singing without the music.
So you just hear her voice.
And also without a sweetener.
Yeah, without auto-tune.
Yeah.
Yeah, it almost seemed like her music.
And when they did it like that, if they just play her singing without the auto-tune, it makes her music seem like it's, I don't know, formulaic and manufactured.
I was shocked to hear that Britney Spears isn't a very good singer.
I'm also stunned by the news that Stephen Hawking can't play drums very well.
Rim shot, please.
Stephen Hawking.
Stephen Hawking.
Hey, by the way, good news.
I don't know if you heard what happened with the Anthony from Opie and Anthony.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, he got fired for all those racist tweets he tweeted.
He was really over the top, kind of unbelievable.
But they fired him.
And it's a good thing they fired him.
Otherwise, I might lose deep respect I have for the Morning Zoo radio DJs.
And thousands, by the way, because of this, thousands are canceling their subscriptions to Sirius XM and renewing their subscriptions to modern racist magazines.
Hey, by the way, did you see that the families of Sandy Hook wanted to meet with Chris Governor Chris Christie about some gun control legislation?
And he said he wasn't going to meet with them.
He refused to meet with the Sandy Hook parents, but he did make sure the bridge lanes were open so they could go fuck themselves.
It is impressive that Chris Christie has lost enough weight to be able to climb all the way up the ass of the NRA gun lobby.
Pretty nice.
Steph, keep it in.
Keep it in.
Don't laugh it up.
Did you hear that?
It was Joe Scarborough called Chris Christie chicken For not meeting.
Is that true, Frank?
He called Chris Christie chicken for not meeting with the Sandy Hook people.
Well, if Chris Christie's chicken, no one will eat him because there's no thighs or breasts.
It's just one big asshole.
And Chris Christie didn't respond.
He couldn't respond because when he heard he was a chicken, he ate himself with a side of fries.
You see what I'm saying, Gilbert?
Gilbert's laughing.
He's on it.
He's on it.
The secret to cooking asshole is a brine.
It is.
Just get a salty brine.
Hey, by the way, Sarah Palin called for Barack Obama's impeachment.
And let me tell you, that is no idle threat because when she was Alaska governor, she managed to get herself impeached.
And by the way, black voters in Mississippi, they voted, right, in that runoff and the Republican runoff.
Black voters came out for Thad Cochran.
And Ted Cruz suspects democracy may have been involved, so he wants an investigation.
Yeah, he's a little upset.
Okay.
All right.
What's coming up on today's show?
Hey, Pot is back in the news.
They're back at it again.
The Nation magazine came out with a big expose, and the anti-pot people might not be on the up and up.
We're going to talk about that.
Plus, Chris Christie says no to meeting with the Sandy Hook people.
We'll talk about that.
Plus, a little bit of the immigration, some gun violence in Chicago, plus a lot more, and some of our favorite vintage phone calls.
That's today on the Jimmy Dore Show.
Jimmy Dore, this is Bill Riley.
You liberal Arugula Munchers should be happy with my latest social campaign.
As you know, the factor helps minority children at risk all across the country.
They make up most of my audience.
So I'm going after the biggest problem facing the black community: sexy music videos.
Yes, you heard me.
Music videos are causing the devastation of unwanted pregnancies and fractured families in black neighborhoods.
Did you see the latest video by Beyoncé?
I didn't like it.
All these teenage black girls who watch VH1 are being corrupted by the likes of Beyonce and Alicia Keys.
It's got to stop Jimmy.
Simple as that.
That Ron Emmanuel has the right idea.
He shut down 47 neighborhood public schools in Chicago.
The only way to help poor families is to force ill brats in the private schools.
Problem solved.
Finally, there's a Democrat with some common sense.
You should take a page out of his book, Jimbo.
Speaking of book, I hear that your book is coming out soon.
If I find out there's anything about me in it, my next book will be called Killing Jimmy Dore.
One hour until I do my show.
I have to go paint my bald spot.
The Jimmy Door show is available as a podcast for free on iTunes.
Or for other ways to subscribe, go to JimmyDoorComedy.com.
And while you're there, you can listen to past episodes and you can comment on them too.
Remember, Jimmy spells his last name, D-O-R-E, jimmydorecomedy.com.
Okay, so now we talked about this on the show way back in January.
So Patrick Kennedy.
I don't know if you know Patrick Kennedy, but he's Patrick Kennedy, one of the many inebriated Kennedys to come into the public spotlight.
Now, he had a problem with addiction.
He was addicted to Oxycontin.
That's a toughie.
And he had to go into rehab a couple of times.
He smashed his car into the Capitol.
Stuff like that.
He's not good with drugs.
Patrick Kennedy, not good.
Just so unusual to hear about an Irish American behaving that way.
Really, really odd, especially a Kennedy.
So back to Jay.
So I'll go over briefly what we covered before back in January.
Well, we only did it on the premium content, so this is going to be new to most people.
So he had on Patrick Kennedy.
He's a senator from Rhode Island.
He used to be the congressman.
Okay.
But now he had to quit being a congressman because he was high on OxyContin and he went driving his car and he smashed it right into the Capitol.
And so he had to resign.
If he'd only drowned a hooker.
Yeah, if it did just.
That's how you move your way up through the Senate.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I don't think Mary Joe was.
I think she was just a regular person.
Okay.
No, she was just a regular person.
Yeah, she's just a regular person.
So Matt.
So that reminds me, Jimmy, this is sort of related, but it's been raining a lot here in New York.
And the other day, Kennedy Airport was so underwater, they renamed it Mary Joe Protectier.
Very nice.
That's good.
That's good.
Very nice.
Wow, that is craftsmanship.
So here is, though, Chris Matthews, I don't know if you know, I like to call him Chris Hardball.
He hosts a news show that is supposed to inform people about topics.
I hadn't heard about it.
I didn't know it was a news show.
Is this new?
Or I am assuming this isn't hardball you're talking about.
No, this is Chris Hardball.
Oh, okay.
I didn't realize it was.
I thought it was sort of a.
Well, he's on a network here.
He's on what they call a cable news network.
Oh.
MS stands for Microsoft and the NBC stands for Defense Contractor.
So he's trying to inform the people.
That's what his job to do is inform people.
But guess what?
The opposite happens, and we get old gray-haired men still afraid of the munchies talking about pot.
So here is because this all started back in January when Barack Obama said that the sentencing for marijuana laws, putting black and Mexican kids in jail for marijuana is a bad thing, and that he is admitted to smoking pot.
I think the last three presidents have all admitted to smoking pot.
And so they didn't go to jail.
So why do we have to put poor kids in jail for it?
And so he made that statement.
Peter Lawford's kid comes on with Patrick.
Chris Lawford.
Chris Lawford?
Yeah.
Yes.
And so here we go.
Here's what Chris Matthews has to say about what President Obama said about marijuana.
The fact is, I don't think he's right on this one.
He doesn't think the president is right on this one, Frank.
Because I think people have addictive personalities, and some people react to freedom differently than others.
And we better be ready for it because it's coming now.
That's the best argument he can come up with because people have addictive personalities and some people react to freedom differently than others.
That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard in my life.
That literally, some people react to freedom in a bad way, so we can't give them freedom.
You can't.
And by the way, Chris Matthews knows about this addiction because he's addicted to bullshit.
I don't know.
Chris Matthews was so little cold sober when he went on and on about how great the mission accomplished photo op was.
Yes, yes.
He probably should have been I back then.
Well, yeah, well, you mean back when he said, so we already knew what Chris Matthews' view on freedom was back during the Iraq war when he said that everybody likes George W. Bush except for the whack jobs.
Right.
Yeah, that was his view on freedom.
Yeah, okay.
The Phil Donahue's of the world.
The real shocker is that when it comes to legalizing pot, like every other issue, Chris Matthews, totally gutless.
Complete shocker.
So now Tweety throws it to Peter Lawford's son, who's almost as dumb as Chris Matthews.
He starts out okay, but quickly reveals his stupid, out of touch, completely wrong, and backward old man thinking about marijuana.
Here, he starts out okay, here we go.
Well, there's no question, Chris.
I mean, the two most damaging drugs on the planet are both legal.
Alcohol and tobacco.
Okay, good start.
Recognition that the drugs that are legal are worse.
I like that.
They're more damaging to the individual and society than pot.
So logically, I'm expecting him to say that we should legalize weed, but here he zags.
We don't need another legal drug.
We don't know.
All the evidence.
We don't need another legal drug.
The strawmen of all strawmen arguments.
No one is saying, you know what I think we need, Dave?
We need another legal drug.
Hey, how about marijuana?
Let's try to make that one legal.
Just pick a name out of the pat.
Psilocybin, magic mushroom.
No, no, we'll go marijuana because we need another.
No, people are saying that the way we deal with our illegal drugs now is counterproductive.
That putting people in jail for marijuana actually causes more harm to society than marijuana.
So that's what they're saying.
So again, thanks for the straw man.
But did you, did you hear what he said?
We don't, all the, all that, here, well, I'll play together.
No, we don't, all the evidence isn't in on marijuana.
All the evidence.
Not in on marijuana.
Yet, we know we do have all the evidence in on tobacco on cigarettes and liquor.
All the evidence is in.
It's horrible and it kills you.
Let's make it legal.
But we don't have the evidence in on marijuana, Frank, because they've only had a million years to study it.
We don't need one more legal drug because that would just unclog our court system and put less people in jail and cost the country much less money.
So we don't need that.
Right.
And we shouldn't legalize a drug that is healthier than alcohol, which might help people and which people are using anyway, because somehow that would be wrong.
I don't know.
But if marijuana does 1% of the damage to this society that Booze has done, Chris Matthews will say, I told you so.
I can't believe that this is being said by someone whose father was so delightful in scenes with June Alipith.
Okay, so here he's got some more to say.
Here's Peter Lawford's case.
I agree with the president in terms of the consequences for some population groups as a result of this drug being illegal.
What he just said was, I agree that, yeah, we put black and Mexicans in prison for marijuana and not white kids.
That's what he just, but he didn't say it that way.
There are some populations, some population, you mean the population you're not a part of or your kids?
You mean that population?
Okay, here we go.
I also think that, you know, quite frankly, if alcohol was illegal today, it wouldn't be legalized.
It is a very damaging drug, and we need to look at that also.
So he just made the case for prohibition being a great solution to the dangers of alcohol.
And somehow the word moron just doesn't seem to sum these guys up, does it?
No!
And again, he's making the legal case for weed.
Yes, he's saying alcohol is bad for you.
We'd have a hard time legalizing it now.
But there is no evidence that weed is bad for you.
So by that logic, legalize the dope.
I agree.
Go ahead, Frank.
It sounds like he's really upset about the rate of alcohol and it's something that should be done about.
Yes.
Yeah, exactly.
Exactly.
This guy, he's for prohibition.
So it gets even worse.
Chris Matthews just starts making stuff up.
And he ends up sounding like my grandma trying to talk about hockey.
Let me go to Patrick Kennedy on this.
It seems to me, I have to go, we all deal with our anecdotal experiences in life.
I mean, that's how you talk from experience.
Right.
I'm hung around.
I'm hungry.
Yeah, so he's anecdotal experience.
And let me tell you, when it comes to drugs, Patrick Kennedy has had a ton of anecdotal experience with drugs.
Okay, here we go.
By the way, when talking about national policy, you don't go to your anecdotal experience.
You go to statistics.
Right.
Exactly.
Everything he just said is wrong.
Yes, exactly right, Robert.
You are right.
Okay, here we go.
Guys that drank too much, and after they drank too much, we go look for dope around midnight.
And so don't tell me booze wasn't a gateway to dope or to marijuana.
And I don't have that much experience with the other stuff, but I do have that concern about the gateway issue.
Your thoughts.
Wait, wait, wait.
First, did he just announce that he's done other drugs?
Because that's just great.
Because he basically just said, I used to snurcoke, right?
Could I just point out to Chris Matthews that booze is a gateway to more booze?
So he's saying Chris Matthews is worried about marijuana because he used to know a lot of drunks.
That's literally what he just said.
I knew a lot of guys will go out and get hammered, and then they go start looking for booze.
I'm going to start looking for pot.
They're already hammered.
Right.
And also, I'm pretty sure.
What are you talking about?
Yeah.
And they were rowdier probably when they were drunk.
Of course.
After a night of drinking, they go smoke joint, and then that's it.
Yes.
Go to the diner.
Yes.
Okay.
So now, by the way, just keep in mind, this is a new show.
And he's supposed to be informing people.
This is his information he's giving to people.
Okay.
So what Chris is saying, if booze is a gateway to marijuana and marijuana is a gateway to something even worse, like, you know, buying Twinkies at three in the morning.
That's what he's saying, I guess.
All right.
So this is about to hit astronomical BS levels, okay?
Now he throws it to ex-addict.
We have to take his word.
He's ex-addict Patrick Kennedy to scare us about pot.
And, you know, at least Chris got an expert on substance abuse, a guy whose father partied in Las Vegas with Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin, and Sammy Davis Jr.
So that's nice, right?
So here comes Patrick Kennedy.
And who's uncle party with those people?
Yes, whose uncle, that's right.
Yeah.
Here we go.
And by the way, a lot of Patrick Kennedy's anecdotal evidence, his anecdotal knowledge about pot was gathered while doing research at the Palm Beach compound during spring break.
Exactly.
And I guess Kennedy can't be for legalization because he'd look like he didn't learn his lesson, I guess, right?
So he has to keep this guy.
And here we go.
And he's about to prove that nobody's more obnoxious than an ex-drug addict convert.
Okay, here we go.
So first, Chris, you hit the nail on the head.
Most of us know about this issue anecdotally.
So what we need, Chris, is we need to know what the science tells us, the science of public health.
Yeah, and the science tells us that the marijuana the kids are smoking today is really killer.
By the way, most of us know about this anecdotally.
I don't think he means the black kids that are in jail.
They know about it non-aney.
They know about it firsthand.
Yeah, literally.
Literally.
Yeah.
He goes on.
So I think the president needs to speak to his NIH director in charge of drug abuse, Nora Volkow, because the NITA director, Nora Volkow, would tell the president that, in fact, today's modern, genetically modified marijuana,
so it's much higher THC levels, far surpass the marijuana the president acknowledges smoking when he was a young person, so that he is wrong when he says that it isn't very harmful because the new marijuana is not the old marijuana.
And of course, the president.
The new marijuana is heroin.
Yeah, the new somehow pot became heroin.
I don't know when that happened, but somehow it's not, it's not pot.
It's not the pot you used to smoke.
It's more, it's stronger.
So I guess what that means is that kids are smoking less of it.
But according to Patrick, they're smoking more of it.
It's just like booze.
Like you drink less, you drink less whiskey than you do beer.
You're going to smoke less potent pot than you would dirtweed.
That's just the way it is.
There's all different levels.
And you don't just, you don't pull unless you're as dumb as a New York Times op-ed writer named Maureen Dowd.
Poor lady, that was what a situation she got herself.
Nobody jams 16 doses of medical marijuana into their head at once.
I'm just waiting for Maureen Dowd to try bath salts.
Yes.
When is she going to try baths?
Ah, nice joke, Brad.
By the way, everything.
Everything gets more of everything in it.
Coca-Cola had caffeine.
Then Mountain Dew came along, had more caffeine.
Then Red Bull came along.
Then Forloco came along.
Now I'm sure there's something else.
So that also has an argument.
Not that great.
And what I understand from the kids today who smoking the pot and being around someone named Jimmy Dore is that the pot is much stronger now, so you kind of just smoke like one or two toast, right?
That's totally correct.
That is totally correct.
And the bad thing, the worst thing that could happen about marijuana is you get put in jail.
The second worst thing is you build up a tolerance to marijuana, which means you have to take a break from smoking every once in a while just so you could get a buzz.
It doesn't mean that you're going to do heroin because you're getting less of a buzz from marijuana.
That's not what it means.
That doesn't happen.
That happened with Patrick Kennedy because he is messed up in the head.
I'd like to add also that, and this is a historic fact, that his uncle, John F. Kennedy, when he was the leader of the free world, was often hopped up on amphetamines and all kinds of drugs that were administered to him by a doctor who was known as Dr. Feelgood.
Yes.
And who had a clientele of very famous, prominent people that would come to his office for shots.
And so his uncle managed to solve the Cuban missile crisis while he was higher than anyone you've ever met in your life.
That's exactly true.
Thank you, Frank.
I appreciate the historical knowledge that was much needed.
Now let's go back to more Patrick Kennedy.
He's making this decision based upon his anecdotal experience.
I like how he, by the way, he started this off by saying we need to go with what the science says, right?
He said we got to follow the science.
And now he's about to make up a ton of incendiary BS science-less points.
Here he goes, right?
We need to have presidential decisions made based upon public health and the sound science that the federal government has invested in, which shows that this is very harmful.
In fact, Chris, as Chris just, my cousin Chris just mentioned, if it's legalized, we know rates of use will increase, availability will increase, and accessibility.
And as you know, Chris, if you have a predisposition to addiction, this is going to be a gateway.
And frankly, Chris, it's a harmful drug in and of itself.
Like, I was lucky, Chris.
I got in and crashed early because I used harder drugs.
was lucky.
I don't know if There's so much stuff you have to unpack what he just said.
He says, let's follow the science.
And then he just starts throwing out old anecdotes that have been debunked.
It's very harmful, he said.
And if you have, it's just unbelievable.
And by the way, we should note, there is no science.
Because the federal government has consistently made it illegal to obtain studies on this in laboratory.
So for both sides of the issue, both pro and con, no one can cite science.
Well, you can't, first of all, you can cite, you can't, you have to charge the people who are against marijuana with coming up with science that says it's bad before I have to defend something that's not bad.
You know what I mean?
That's like saying, hey, water causes cancer.
Give me your studies.
No, no, you have to come up with a study that shows water causes cancer, and then I'll debunk it.
You can't just make me come up with something.
The people on the side of pot have a better understanding of science because they've watched the matrix a lot when they're fake.
But the problem is, Robert, with Patrick Kennedy, is that he thinks keeping it illegal is a great idea because drug addicts need to go to prison, I guess.
Not drug addicts like him, Robert.
He's white and rich and well-connected, but other drug addicts need to go to prison.
And if the research shows that only brown and black kids go to jail for pot, just ignore it and keep screaming about how pot is going to ruin the world.
And why do they need to go to Protford prison?
Go to prison for pot, Robert, so that guys like Patrick Kennedy don't get their hands on harder drugs or something like that.
I don't know.
That's the logic he's using here.
Because if you don't put potheads in jail, Patrick Kennedy is going to do OxyContin.
That's his logic.
Right.
So this is Patrick Kennedy.
You know who Patrick Kennedy is?
Probably the worst public policy person I've heard.
The worst guy you could have.
He is the guy.
He's the worst guy you could have making this case because he's the guy at the party.
We all know this guy.
We're all having a good time at the party.
We're having a couple cocktails, smoking a little weed, enjoying ourself on the weekend.
Patrick Kennedy is getting hammered, becoming obnoxious, pukes on the couch, raids your medicine cabinet, downs all your OxyContin, and then smashes his car in your front yard.
And then when he sobers up, comes back and tells everybody they got to stop smoking pot.
That's who Patrick Kennedy is.
The guy who can't handle anything tells me because he's a loser on an unbelievable scale that I can't smoke pot.
No, you're messed up.
You have weaknesses.
You should go around apologizing for them.
And you're not.
But what you want to do is tell people who can handle drugs recreationally that somehow they're evil because guys like you who are weak and broken are hanging around.
So we have to curtail our freedom because you have a problem.
No, why don't you go fix yourself and laugh the rest of the world To themselves.
Okay, Patrick Kennedy gets me a little worked up.
Nothing like being moralized to by a Kennedy.
Fresh out of rehab.
Okay, so we're up against a break.
We got a lot more comedy coming up in the second half.
We got more phone calls from Bill O'Reilly.
You don't want to miss that.
Plus, we got a surprise, a little fact that kind of is embarrassing for Patrick Kennedy.
That's in the second half.
We'll be right back in one minute.
This is the Jimmy Dore show on Pacifica.
People say, Jimmy, how do I help support the show?
And without actually spending any money out of my own pocket.
And I say, I have a great way you can help support the show is the next time you want to buy something from Amazon.com, you go to JimmyDoorComedy.com and you click on our Amazon box, which then takes you to Amazon.com.
And then when you buy something, they send us money.
That's not that complicated.
Gilbert still doesn't understand it, but I'm explaining it to everybody else.
So thanks, everybody who already does that and thinks about the Jimmy Doer show when they buy something from Amazon.com.
It's just that easy.
You go over to JimmyDoorComedy.com, you click on the Amazon box, it takes you right to Amazon.com.
And then when you buy something, they send us money.
It doesn't cost you anything.
It doesn't change the way you shop at Amazon, but it sure does help support the show.
So thanks, everybody who does that and bookmarks our Amazon link.
That's really nice.
Okay, let's get back to the second half.
A lot of great stuff coming up.
Thank you.
you Thank you.
you Thank you.
Hey, welcome back to the Jimmy Doer show.
I'm joined by Frank Connett from Mystery Science Theater 3000.
And from the Rubin Report, it's Dave Rubin, also hilarious comedian Robert Yasamura.
And from Comedy and Everything Else, it's Steph Zamarano.
And we're going to be talking.
First of all, we've got some phone calls from Bill O'Reilly coming up.
And we're going to be talking about where's the funding coming for the war against marijuana.
For all the people who want to keep it illegal, there's some interesting facts that got revealed that also kind of blow Patrick Kennedy out of the water.
But first, let's get to our Bill O'Reilly, one of our vintage calls from Bill O'Reilly.
Jimmy Dore, it's Bill O'Reilly.
Hey, I've been listening to what you and your pinhead friends have been saying about the Trayvon Martin case.
And I have to say, there's absolutely no substance to your argument.
It's like you've ended this discussion completely unarmed with only an iced tea and a bag of Skittles to back you up, while me and my pal Bernie Goldberg are coming in, gone to blaze, and chasing you and your lousy reasoning down and shooting you in the gut.
Hey, that's a pretty good metaphor.
I don't know how I came up with it.
You can see why I'm such a successful author.
Anyway, I'm standing my ground on the Stand Your Ground Wall.
It's one of the best laws ever passed.
It protects defenseless Americans with nothing to protect them but a fully loaded gun from innocuous black teenagers who rampage into our communities with nothing on their minds but buying things at convenience stores.
But if you and your progressive pinhead pals had your way, a black kid in a hoodie would be entitled to any item in any store just because he paid for them.
What kind of a jungle would we be living in if we allowed that to happen?
Yeah, you're right.
I said jungle.
Jimmy, race shouldn't even be a part of this discussion.
As my good friend Bernie Goldberg said, if this had been a black guy shooting a black guy, no one would have thought anything of it because the black guy doing the shooting would have been arrested and or killed.
Actually, Bernie didn't mention that last part because he doesn't believe in race baiting.
And by that, I mean he doesn't believe in mentioning race when it's pertinent to a news story.
That's just the kind of stand-up guy Bernie is.
And by the way, Jimmy, I've never advocated violence against black people.
The only person I ever encouraged my listeners to go kill was abortion doctor George Tiller.
So when it comes to stirring up hate crimes, I am completely colorblind.
Look, Jimmy, just because a disproportionate number of black people are arrested, there's no reason to think that a disproportionate number of black people are arrested.
The numbers just don't add up unless you add up the numbers.
Boy, sometimes I'm so blurry that's scary.
You wouldn't want to run into my big opposing brain on a dark night in a gated community.
I'll tell you that much.
Well, Jimmy, I gotta go.
Bernie Goldberg and I are doing a segment on why everyone refers to Motown Records as a black record label, even though all the music that was made there was black music.
Really?
Come on.
Why bring race into it?
As Bernie points out, calling Motown music black music is just another example of racism towards white people.
So long, Jagoff.
The Jimmy Door show is available as a podcast for free on iTunes.
Or for other ways to subscribe, go to jimmydoorcomedy.com.
And while you're there, you can listen to past episodes and you can comment on them too.
Remember, Jimmy spells his last name, D-O-R-E, JimmyDoorComedy.com.
Sean James makes my computer work so I can do the show on my Macintosh and he can fix your Macintosh too right over the internet.
Go to SeanJames.com.
That's S-H-A-U-N-James.com.
Hey, so guess what?
What?
So it turns out that the anti-pot people like Patrick Kennedy are being funded by the makers of OxyContin.
What?
Oh, no.
Oxycontin.
By the way, it's prescription drugs which kill thousands and thousands of people every year.
It's our biggest problem happening right now.
They're trying to get people to, they're trying to get the pass laws to make it harder to regulate it even stricter because everybody has access.
You know, 75% of all Vicodin in the world is sold in America.
Did you know that?
75% of all Vicodin in America, and we only have 5% of the world's population.
So the Nation magazine did an investigation and they found out that, yeah, these anti-pot organizations, the ones that Patrick Kennedy has spoken for and all that, they're all on the take from the pharmaceutical.
Well, here, turns out there's a sophisticated, well-funded lobby campaign aimed at keeping marijuana illegal.
According to Nation magazine, quote, it's more than a little odd that community anti-drug coalitions of America and the other groups leading the fight against relaxing marijuana laws, including the Partnership for Drug-Free Kids, formerly known as the Partnership for Drug-Free America.
All of those organizations derive a significant portion of their budget from opioid manufacturers and other pharmaceuticals.
Well, son of a gun.
Who saw this coming except everyone?
But trying to get more regulations for OxyContin and Vicodin, they're not on board for that stuff.
Patrick Kennedy never speaks.
You know, he just said that, yes, we have way more availability of opioids.
And he said that the availability made the problem, but he doesn't say we need to rein in OxyContin and Viking.
He never says that at all.
He just talks about pot.
Of course.
And every time somebody dies of a drug overdose now, think of every celebrity drug overdose.
Is it ever because of weed?
It's not even because of booze.
What's it because of prescription drugs?
Prescription drugs.
Willie Nelson, Willie Nelson has the longest career in music history.
Yes.
So here's what I just want to put, this is the last thing that Patrick Kennedy said about marijuana on our last segment.
I'm going to play it for you right now.
I used harder drugs.
Marijuana is insidious.
You could be using it for most of your life and not wake up to the fact that you're on a slow train to nowhere.
You're on a slow train to nowhere because of people like the Kennedy family.
Not because.
Come on.
So what Patrick Kennedy is saying is you could be smoking marijuana your whole life, having a great time without realizing it's having absolutely almost no effect on you.
That's his problem.
You could go through your whole life, Frank, have a perfectly productive life and not realize that your whole life has been a failure.
Aren't most people on a slow train to nowhere?
At least be stoned while you're on the train.
I think for some reason, Pastor Kennedy thinks it's messed up that with POT, it takes you much longer to go through your trust spot.
Yeah, we got to keep pot illegal because look who's making the case for legalization.
Bunch of stoners.
So here, Chris Hayes, by the way, the Nation magazine said that it looks like that legalization's biggest threat, the legalization of marijuana, the biggest threat from that is to the bottom line of these pharmaceutical companies, which reap significant monetary advantages from pot prohibition.
And those advantages are rarely acknowledged in the public debate, like Patrick Kennedy.
Never going to bring it up.
Never going to bring it up, right?
And so here's Chris Hayes with his new glasses, by the way.
Have you seen his new big line?
He's got the new big glasses, Frank.
He looks like if Mr. Peabody and Sherman had a son.
Aren't those the ones Steph's wearing right now?
No.
And so all this, so this Nation report.
Chris Hayes afraid those glasses are going to, they can come off as kind of dirty.
He's doubling down.
So all this, so this so Chris Hayes read this article in The Nation about how OxyContin manufacturers are funding all this anti-pot people.
And it led him, he turned into a real Colombo, and he said this.
Could it be that big pharmaceutical companies are working to keep marijuana illegal because pot might be a cheaper, even safer alternative to the legal prescription products they're in the business of selling right now.
Okay, that's what you call a rhetorical question, I think.
He was a, could it be, hmm, let's really think about this.
Is there gambling happening here, Rick?
I don't know.
Are you kidding me?
So that was his big.
So then he brings on the guy who wrote the article for Nation.
And Chris Hayes continues to be shocked at the information he's discovering about the anti-pot lobby.
Just completely sh.
You obtained a confidential document that showed the funding structure of one of these groups that has been pushing hard against marijuana legalization.
And I was kind of amazed to see there was a lot of big pharmaceutical companies contributing to them.
Completely shocked.
I can't believe it.
So Chris Hayes then brings on Patrick Kennedy.
Oh, Lord.
He then brings on Peter because Patrick Kennedy.
I mean, I would expect that from Chris Matthews, but not from the state.
Chris Hayes brings on Patrick Kennedy because that magazine article also exposed Patrick Kennedy for being on the take, right, and working with the OxyCons and not saying anything against the opioid manufacturers.
And that's why he's bringing him on, because he got exposed in that article.
And also because Chris Hayes is trying to bring back civility to TV news by being very polite and well-mannered to corrupt hypocrites.
So here Patrick Kennedy tells how after a couple of stints and rehab, he pushed for parity in insurance coverage for the mental health, which is a good thing you would do.
That's a good thing.
And then he says this.
I found myself going around to the different states to promote really implementation of the mental health parity law.
And then I came across both the medical marijuana, which is really a Trojan horse for legalization.
Yes.
Yes.
Trojan horse for it's really medical marijuana.
I don't know if you saw Dr. Sanjay Gupta do like, I don't know, a whole weekend about the benefits of medical marijuana, but Patrick Kennedy knows better than Dr. Sanjay Gupta.
You know, the ex-drug addict who crashed his car into the Capitol, who hasn't made sense ever when he's talking on television, just said that Dr. Sanjay Gupta doesn't know what he's talking about.
By the way, Jamie, I know this is anecdotal.
What sick twisty warp fuck would stop someone with cancer or with AIDS from doing something that's going to make them feel better?
And that's what these people who are, you know, using medical marijuana are doing.
Yes.
So that's it.
So Patrick Kennedy, again, just comes on with anti-information.
He's misinforming people, disinforming them.
He's talking as if we, as if it's 1970 and we don't know anything about marijuana.
So here he goes.
So then Chris Hayes brings on a doctor to point out where Patrick Kennedy was wrong, right?
And he says that the real problem in America is not marijuana, but it's opioid abuse, opiate abuse, and it's fueled by availability and accessibility of OxyContin and Vicodin.
And he says all that stuff.
And here's what Patrick Kennedy says back, right?
Here's what Patrick Kennedy says back.
And the whole concept of adding to the burden that our society faces with addiction by legalizing another drug.
I agree with.
Ah, we shouldn't add to the burden by legalizing another drug.
No, no, we're not adding to the burden.
We're going to stop doing things that are counterproductive, you a-hole, okay?
We're going to stop putting blacks and Mexican kids in prison for smoking pot.
The things that you did and worse, and you never did a day in prison because you're white and privileged.
That's what we're talking about.
Okay, here we go.
I think opiate abuse has really been fueled by availability and accessibility of OxyContin and other drugs.
Why do we want to double down on that and add another psychedelic drug?
Again, there's the BS.
Psychic.
Psychedelic.
Marijuana is psychedelic.
He's smoking some good weed, I'll tell you that much.
Psychedelic weed.
Patrick Kennedy, former Congressman Patrick Kennedy, is one of those guys who gets his principles from his paycheck.
Pretty sure.
You know, he just a minute ago, he said he called pot a Trojan horse.
Yes.
And coincidentally, I used to get high on Trojan horse tranquilizer.
So there he goes again.
He throws out the fuzz.
Just false, false, false, lying, false.
He doesn't, he says, he says the thing about, yes, I agree with you that it's being the opioid abuse is bad.
It's being fueled by the availability, but he doesn't say anything about curtailing it.
Never.
Never ever speaks about curtailing the availability of opioids or OxyContin or Vicodin, never, you know, because that's the people he's in business with right now.
Those are the people who don't want marijuana because marijuana fixes a lot of those problems at a much cheaper way and it's less damaging to your body.
I'd rather take marijuana than ambient.
I'd rather take marijuana than Vicodin.
I'd rather take marijuana than OxyContin because if I get addicted to marijuana, you know what happens?
Nothing.
Nothing is going to happen.
I will build a tolerance to it.
That's what will happen.
What if they brought Kwaluds back?
Would you be down for that?
Because that was before my time.
I've heard great things.
I wish they would bring Kwaluds back.
Yeah, that would be nice.
I heard good things.
Kwalin is Scotch.
I think that's what they say a good weekend is made of.
Yeah.
Right?
Anyone?
You know, I was around for Kwaluds, but I never did them.
And the good thing about that is I never became a black saddest fan.
So here, so here is the, he agrees.
Opiate abuse has really been fueled by the availability of OxyContin.
So logically, and by the way, what he's not saying is that if you're in a major city, it's harder to get OxyContin than it is to get weed now.
Right.
Leet-like with it is legal.
It's much harder to get it as a prescription drug.
Yeah.
So I'm just saying, like, his entire argument is wrong in that sense.
Like, you want to make pot hard to get.
Legalize it.
I'm telling you.
No, Robert, you are correct, buddy.
So, but if he's agreeing that opiate abuse has been fueled, has really been fueled by the availability of OxyContin.
So logically, that's why he'd be spending his time and energy campaigning against the availability of OxyContin.
Oh, wait, he isn't.
Hmm.
By the way, you know who's another OxyContin addict that is against marijuana?
Who?
Mr. Rush Limbaugh.
Oh, sorry.
Yeah.
I don't know how we haven't mentioned him in this little story.
Your good buddy Rush Limbaugh?
Yeah.
Doesn't like the weed, but he's hooked on the.
Listen, I've got a question for you, Dave Rubin.
Why do we, in the words of Patrick Kennedy, why do we want to double down?
Why do we want to double down on another drug when Purdue Pharma is doubling down on their profits?
Right?
Good question.
The history of opioids from basically, I can't remember what the first one that really hits, but basically the history is of them becoming more and more refined and much more and more addictive.
And in the last 20 years, what's most interesting is that the pharmaceutical companies keep going, oh, this will have all the painkiller effect, but it won't have addictive properties.
And they're always more addictive, much more addictive.
So, you know, like when we replaced Vicodin with Oxy, everybody was like, oh, this should, you know, fix the problem of Vicodin addiction.
And everybody got more addicted.
So, I mean, the pharmaceutical industry on this point is talking right out of both sides of their mouth.
They always have been.
They've somehow convinced doctors to just not care.
Yes, that is correct.
And it's infuriating because chronic pain is a very real issue.
It does need to be treated.
It needs to be dealt with.
But opioid addiction is, let me put it this way.
A lot of us have the genetic predisposition for opioid addiction much more than, say, marijuana addiction.
That genetic predisposition is not rare, but it's certainly not as common as most people, given enough opium, will get hooked on opium.
Okay.
Period.
Right.
So it's infuriating for the pharmaceutical industry to be continuing this canard when they're basically just selling really good heroin.
Yes, that's exactly what it's a great point.
Heroin is a brand name.
Did you know that?
No, I didn't.
Heroin is a brand name from the same guy who invented aspirin.
Really?
I can't remember for squib farms.
No, okay.
Johnson Johnson.
I can't remember.
You know, I remember I used to always say, I've got a headache.
This big and it's got heroin written all over it.
You know, Frank, America is beautiful, right?
Minorities and low-income people get harassed and imprisoned for smoking an herb.
But if you're a Kennedy, you go to rehab and then get out and lobby for the companies that made the drugs that you were abusing.
It's like the cycle of life if you're a Kennedy.
Well, Patrick Kennedy also has a genetic predisposition to appeasing Nazis.
Ha!
Beep.
Jimmy Dor, Bill O'Reilly.
Hey, quit ragging on John Stossel.
He's a stand-up guy.
He stands up for the little guy.
And by that, I mean guys running giant corporations who do little or nothing for the poor and working class.
Listen, Dorr, Stossel practices consumer protection, which means he protects corporations from consumers who want to be protected from corporations who want to protect the bottom lines from consumers who want to be protected from the anti-protectionist policies of giant corporations.
It's as simple as that, Jimmy.
Stossel is against the one thing that is ruining America above all, deregulation.
The corporate world was deregulated like crazy during the Clinton years, but Clinton was a Democrat.
So the massive corporate deregulation he opposed can only be described as socialist.
I mean, under Clinton, most corporations were deregulated, but not all of them.
So then Bush came in and reformed this sorry state of affairs by deregulating the rest of them, making it more democratic.
Then the economy went into the crapper, but that was Sean Penn's fault, not Bush's.
Anyway, Dorr, my point is that John Stossel is the only consumer advocate who advocates the overthrow of consumers.
And that is a brave standard taken to stay in age.
And what's even more impressive is that Stossel is doing this despite having a mustache that makes him look creepier than a Penn State assistant coach giving boogie board lessons at the beach underneath the sign that says no parents allowed.
So listen, Dorr, lay off John Stossel.
Lay off Stossel.
And don't think all you public radio pinheads are safe from his investigative zeal.
When he gets through with you, you'll be broadcasting from some godforsaken outpost that no one ever tunes into, like the Fox Business Channel.
That's a threat.
Shivers down your spine.
That's what that should be.
O'Reilly out on the Joining us now on the show, a hilarious comedian.
You might have seen him on his Comedy Central specials, or you might have seen him on David Letterman, or you might have seen him with me in Atlantic City at the Bergada Hotel.
Maybe if you were a lucky one of those 100 people, he's with us today right now.
It's Ted Alexandro, ladies and gentlemen.
Hi, Ted.
Hi, Jimmy.
I remember that gig fondly.
I remember that too.
A lot of drugs.
Anyway, now, Ted, you're involved.
Now, you're hilarious.
You're a big shot comedian in New York City, and you've got a bunch of your comedian friends together to do a YouTube show.
Now, you know, I have this show is also on the YouTube, so this is exciting.
You have a new YouTube show, and it's called The Teacher's Lounge.
Now, tell me everybody who's involved in it.
We've got Jim Gaffigan, Janine Garofilo, David Tell, Lewis Black, Judy Gold, Todd Barry, Michael Che, Jim Norton, Rachel Feinstein.
Gosh, am I forgetting anyone?
Ted Leo, musician Ted Leo, and the pharmacists.
All right.
Wow.
That's a pretty high-powered, you know, you got a nice cast there for a YouTube show.
That's amazing, right?
Yes, yes.
So what do you want people to know about the show?
It's funny.
By the way, I just watched it.
Very funny.
I laughed out loud.
And the first episode, Jim Gaffigan is hilarious.
Of course, you, and who's the other guy with you there?
Is his name Hollis?
Hollis James and I, we went to college together.
We started in comedy together as a duo, believe it or not, many years ago.
And we've done projects together over the years, Hollis and I, and we co-created Teacher's Lounge together.
And basically, it was kind of a DIY indie project where we just called, you know, these people that I'm friends with.
I forgot Judah Friedlander as well from 30 Rock.
He's a world champion.
He's a world champion.
He's the world champ.
Yeah, we were lucky to get together.
Yeah, so it was really just this exciting thing of, in the most basic sense, Hollis and I writing these scripts, calling these people up, and everybody saying yes, man.
So it was a very grassroots thing.
And we did a Kickstarter to help us raise the money to do it, which we hit our goal about a month ago.
Wow.
And yeah, so it was all pretty exciting.
You know, it was kind of circumventing the man, if you will.
Now, why teachers?
Now, are you a former teacher?
What was your connection to teaching?
It was just an idea.
Exactly.
No, I was an elementary school music teacher here in New York City for five years when I first graduated college.
I had been a double major.
I was a jazz piano major.
And I also had my education.
I got my master's in elementary education.
So when I first graduated, I was teaching during the day and kind of roving around to open mics at night.
So I kind of always had it in the back of my mind that, you know, setting a show in a teacher's lounge would be a funny idea.
So here we are 20 years later.
So you're one of those money-grubbing teachers that I've heard so much about lately that have been bankrupting our treasury with their gold-plated health and medical benefits, right?
That's right.
That's right.
Yeah, I was at the forefront of that.
And then I got out before they could trace it back to me.
So how did you let go of the greed of being a teacher to jump into the lucrative business of standing up comedy?
That's amazing.
Yeah, I had the trifecta of jazz, piano, teaching, and comedy.
I was going to hit it rich one way or another.
Well, if you would have been a library science major, that would have been nice.
Yeah.
Libraries are hot now.
Anyway.
So this show is really funny.
Now, where can people find the show?
Tell me about it.
Yeah, so you can see them on thundershorts.com and you can also see them, of course, on TedAlexandro.com and, you know, my Twitter and Facebook and all that.
Okay, now, Ted, do you have any new jokes you want me to set you up for?
Since it's always nice to be timely, I was talking about the World Cup.
Yes, let's do it.
The World Cup.
It's exciting, you know, and I think it's important for Americans, especially in big cities like New York, because it's the one time that we can really identify our neighbors' ethnicity with any kind of accuracy.
You know, because I tend to paint with a very broad Mexican brush.
And it's like, oh, wow.
Manuel, have you been Ecuadorian this entire time?
I owe you an apology, my friend.
Oh, you're having a hard time discerning the different types of Hispanics.
Yeah, I don't put enough effort in.
I think it's on me, and the World Cup is helping to change that.
Okay.
I'm with you.
I actually found the sport, while it's designed to be as boring as possible, it still has moments of excitement.
Yeah, yeah.
You know, I think Americans, we have a hard time grasping it.
It's not violent enough.
I was saying that I think the only thing that really stirs that kind of passion in Americans is if there's a mass shooting.
You know, that's when we really get upset and engaged.
So perhaps if we could just shoot the American soccer team, you know, every World Cup, it's a small sacrifice to make to get us into it.
Ah, it's great.
That is great.
See, when you need real solutions, you turn to comedy.
That's where you go.
Comedy and violence is a great intersection.
That's hilarious.
All right.
Ted Alexandro, thanks for coming on the show and being funny.
And the new show is hilarious.
I just checked it out.
I urge everybody to check it out.
It's called Teacher's Lounge.
It stars Ted himself and a bunch of other very famous comedians that you'll notice.
Lewis Black and David Tell and Janine Garofilo.
And Jim Gaffigan's in the first episode, everybody's favorite comedian who's got a bestseller out right now.
So it's a big show.
Everybody, there'll be a link at jimmydoorcomedy.com for the teacher's lounge starring Ted Alexandro.
Ted, thanks for coming on, buddy.
Oh, my pleasure, Jimmy.
Always great talking to you, Paul.
Okay, take care.
This past week on Meet the Press, Raul Labrador, U.S. Representative for Idaho's first congressional district, recommends that our country needs to immediately deport these children back to their country.
He went on to say, I know it sounds difficult, but they are creating a crisis at this time, and it actually is harming the children.
Huh?
Dear Mr. Labrador and every other gutless asshole who wants to send these victims back to a horrific situation that isn't changing anytime soon, maybe instead of visiting the border, you should actually go to Central America and try to exist.
So what's it gonna be, America?
Are you going to welcome these refugees or are you going to turn these children away?
Because they are inconvenient and too costly.
I guess we can't afford to be compassionate humanitarians, but we can afford to subsidize Fortune 500 companies like Walmart, FYI, Walmart workers cost taxpayers $6.2 billion in public assistance annually.
Wow.
We are spending $2 billion a day on things that go boom.
So let me get the facts straight.
We can subsidize Walmart, spread democracy by occupying other countries.
But when people like what we are peddling throughout the world, aka democracy, and come knocking on our door, we say, you're breaking the laws by crossing the border to afford yourself a better life.
And sure, you're five years old.
So here's some snapple, freshly laundered clothing, and go back to where you belong, Muchacho.
We are closed for business.
But if you have some valuable resources, such as, but if you have some valuable resources, such as oil, maybe we'll be able to help you out and invade your country to spread democracy.
Wink, wink.
Ha, ha, ha.
Nice job.
Nice.
Hey, ho.
So what's coming up in the premium content this week?
Well, I decided to read a couple of viewer or viewer?
No, listener emails, right?
A couple of people.
Well, I get the mean ones all the time.
People are just very, people just think they could just be mean.
Well, they can be, I guess.
So people are just mean whenever they feel like it.
They just are like rude and say negative things about the show.
And I guess they think it's okay because they first go, hey, I really like the show.
But guess what?
That thing really sucked that you did.
That other thing was horrible.
So people do that.
And so it hurts my feelings.
And then I read it.
I read it in front of the guys and we talk about some of the emails.
Okay.
That's coming up with premium content this week and a couple of other things that, of course, very good.
Jimmy, how do I get access to the premium?
You go over to JimmyDoorComedy.com.
You make your $5 a month donation and we send you a passcode, get you access to all the stuff.
We have an app too.
You can download the app and all that stuff.
And I thought the app when I had paid the guy a million dollars to do it for me, I thought it was all also an Android app.
But someone sent me an email saying, hey, you're going to make an Android app.
I thought it was.
I thought that when I had hired the app developer guy to do that, I thought it was doing both, but I guess not.
So I guess I'll have to spend even more money and get an Android app.
Okay.
So again, this is, I'm a comedian, and the fact that I'm even able to type on a computer is no minor miracle, right?
I spent my whole life doing nothing all day and then working for 45 minutes telling jokes at night.
So since I started doing this show, I've had to learn, I've had to learn things.
I'm not, I don't like learning things, technical things.
Anyway, so that's what's happening.
And that's what's in the premium content this week.
So check it out.
Become a donator, become a great person and help support the show in the best way possible.
I'll see everybody tonight in San Francisco for the TYT.
No apologies to her.
And I'll be in Las Vegas next week, July 15th through 20.
So we'll see you there.
And the book is out.
Treat yourself.
Go over and get that goddamn, your country is just not that into you.
Hilarious book.
Let's make it a New York Times bestseller.
Enjoy the book.
And there's a link over at jimmydoorcomedy.com for that, okay?
Big thanks to Ted Alexandro for making time for us today.
Check out his new show, Teacher's Lounge.
There'll be links over at the website.
And today's show was written.
That's right.
It was written by Mike McRae, Frank Conniff, Mark Van Landuitt, Robert Yasamura, and Steph Zamarano.
All the voices today performed, of course, by the one and only the inimitable Mike McRae, who can be found at mikemcrae.com.
Okay, that's it for this week.
▲
Export Selection