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June 16, 2012 - Jimmy Dore Show
01:15:13
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Within the next two weeks, the Supreme Court will rule on President Obama's health care law.
In choosing whether to uphold the law or strike it down, the five conservative justices must carefully weigh all the evidence and then decide which result screws Obama the most.
Recent polls suggest a large majority of Americans are still opposed to the individual mandate, which forces them to buy health insurance.
Naturally, as Americans, we demand the freedom to not have health insurance, the same way we demand the freedom to not exercise, to eat too much bacon, and to walk into oncoming traffic.
Some say Obama failed to adequately explain why a law meant to help people obtain health insurance was a good thing.
He never made the connection between health insurance and ensuring one's health.
He never seemed to say that without possessing health, a person gets sick and eventually dies.
And never once did Obama say that dying is bad.
It was almost as if he didn't want us to know.
Or perhaps it is simply that in America, we have a tradition of rugged individualism.
What this means is if something bad happens to somebody we don't know, it's the same as if it never even happened, which is pretty darn rugged.
I think if you took a random group of Americans and told each one, starting tomorrow, you can have all the money you want, but the government will be a fascist dictatorship, many of them would seriously consider the offer and think, well, I don't vote anyway, and certain people should be rounded up.
As long as I'm not forced to buy health insurance.
Great.
Very nice.
Thank you.
Thank you.
It's the Jimmy Dore Show.
The show for...
The kind of people that are.
It's the show that makes Anderson Cooper save.
It's hard to talk to you, K-Vale.
And now, here's a guy who sounds a lot like me.
It's Jimmy Dore!
Everybody, welcome to this week's episode.
I am joined in studio.
Oh, across the glass, because we're actually in the studio.
We're in the studio this week, Rick.
Studio D in Hollywood at the Real Studio.
So across the glass from me to my right, hilarious writer, hilarious comedian and former writer for the Daily Show at Steve Rosenfield.
Hello, Steve.
How are you?
Good, Jimmy.
How are you?
Oh, I got to tell you, you look nice through the glass.
Thank you.
I don't know what that means.
I don't know either.
But next to you is an Asian man named Robert Yasamura, a hilarious comedian from Team Yasamura.
Hey, Robert, how are you?
Bonjour.
Oh, just back from his trip to Paris.
How was that?
Did you guys manage to hook up a swinging session?
No more than usual.
Across from him, hilarious comedian, former writer of The Daily Show and author of the book, Morning Remembrance.
Is that what it's called?
That's what it's called, yeah.
A collection of mocking obituaries.
Collection of mocking obituaries.
Did you bring a couple to read today?
I got one, yeah.
Okay.
Let's do a quick one.
I think we're going to do a couple of those.
It's Jim Earle, ladies and gentlemen.
Hi, Jim.
Hey, how are you?
It's great seeing you through the glass again.
It's great to see you through the glass.
Jim.
It reminds me of a Danny Thomas coffee table.
Okay, I'm not, I don't know what any of that means, Jim, because I'm a Catholic.
He can explain it.
Next to him, from Mystery Science Theater 3000 and CinematicTitanic.com coming to a city near you.
It's Frank Conniff.
Hi, Frank.
Hey, Jimmy.
I haven't seen you through glass since Show World in Times Square.
Get it.
Hey, Frank, I got one question for you.
Tokens are browsing.
I buy a couple of tokens just so I won't get hassled.
Speaking of...
laughter Yeah, I hate the hassle.
Let's do some jokes about Jerry Sandusky's at trial.
It's nice.
You know, his nickname used to be Tickle Monster.
And in jail, it's going to be Fist Pillow.
Hey, did you hear that the Game the Thrones, they put a decapitated George W. Bush's head.
They use it in a scene.
Did you hear about that?
And the Republicans are more upset about a fake decapitated George W. Bush head on Game of Thrones than by real severed limbs caused by the Iraq war.
Not a big laugher, but certainly appointment.
True.
Who's your thoughts?
I'd be upset, too.
I would be upset.
Hey, guess what?
They're putting bacon in the Sundays at Burger King.
Did you hear that?
Yeah, Bacon Sunday at Burger King.
In New York City, you can eat a Burger King bacon Sunday, but you can't drink a giant sugary soda.
So luckily, obesity is not a worry.
You know, a bacon Sunday at Burger King combined with a double D from KFC will make you a DOA at the ICU before you can get an MRI or an EKG.
Did you know that?
That's a tough joke to get through.
Should have put an ASAP in there.
All right.
And guess what?
Both Rock of Ages and the new Adam Sandler movie are opening this Friday.
So the Weather Channel is forescasting a sh ⁇ storm for the weekend.
Okay, what's coming up on today's show?
Jamie Dimon testified in front of the House on idiot committees.
No, it was the Senate.
It was the Senate Committee on the Sanking Committee, right?
The Banking Committee.
And they didn't even have to give Jamie Dimon a chair because he's sitting on his giant.
Coming up, that's coming up, Jamie Dimon.
Then we're going to talk about Mitt Romney talking about we don't need teachers and cops and firemen and how Rush Slimbaugh and Governor Huckabee backs that up.
Plus, we got phone calls coming up today from Mitt Romney and Bill O'Reilly calls in drunk again.
That's today on the Jimmy Doer show.
Time for another installment of Oh My God.
Okay, we're going to start off with the Oh My God segment.
Guess who's in it?
It's Chris Matthews' old pal, Tony Perkins, and he's got some nice words about ExxonMobil.
At ExxonMobil, the shareholders put their stock in something other than political correctness.
Hello, I'm Tony Perkins with the Family Research Council in Washington.
It won't change the price of gas, but it may comfort you to know that at ExxonMobil, your business isn't fueling the homosexual agenda.
At Exxon's annual meeting, shareholders refused to add special protections based upon sexual orientation to the employment policy.
It was the 13th straight year the company wouldn't cave to the pressure.
Well, the outcome wasn't a surprise.
The margin of victory certainly was.
80% of the company voted no.
That was the highest number since 1999.
That was a huge shock to liberals who were pushing the change, who said the resolution had 40% support in years past.
But that was before President Obama forced Americans into a debate about homosexual marriage.
Now the backlash is starting to show, and it's not just political.
Maybe Exxon's courage will fuel other companies to stand for true American values.
Okay, that's the truth.
Hey, praise to Exxon for standing up against the most ridiculed people in our society.
Isn't it nice, right?
There's still somebody that you can totally discriminate against, and then it's looked at as a virtue.
It's great that the underdogs like Exxon are standing up.
Good for them.
They're standing up for good American values, you know, like raping the land, parking profits offshore.
But when they rape the land, it's never from behind.
They always do it in a heterosexual way.
Remember when Chevron added F310 to their gas to protect your engine against gayness?
LAUGHTER music This has been, oh my God.
Oh my God.
Okay, well, Jamie Dimon sat down in front of the Senate Banking Committee, and it was really, I don't know if you saw it, but man, they beat him up.
It was brutal.
It was unbelievable.
It was really, first of all, I'll pray.
Here's Senator Corker.
Listen to what Senator Corker had to say.
You're obviously renowned, rightfully so, I think, as being one of the most, you know, one of the best CEOs in the country for financial institutions.
You miss this.
It's a blip on the radar screen.
Yeah, so he's talking about the $2 billion that Jamie.
He's like, I can't believe how just disrespectful he was to him about that.
He's talking about.
Jamie alone.
Losing $2 billion is not a blip, Senator Corcoran.
The smoke detectors weren't going off because he was holding his feet to the fire.
So I thought it was because he was blowing smoke up his ass.
Well, that too.
Okay, that would have been good.
Here's Mike Johans from Nebraska.
Listen, I'm sticking it to Jamie Dimon.
A loss is unfortunate.
You've apologized for that.
He's apologized for losing $2 billion.
What else do you want from me?
Now that he's apologized, we can just forget about it and move on.
I got to say, the worst browbeating came from Senator Jim DeMint.
I don't know if you know Senator Jim DeMint, a teabagger.
He stands, he's against corruption and malfeasance.
And here's what he had to say to Jamie Dimon.
Wait, watch him take him down.
We can hardly sit in judgment of you're losing $2 billion.
We lose twice that every day here in Washington.
And plan to continue to do that every day.
It's comforting to know that even with a $2 billion loss in a trade last year, your company still, I think, had a $19 billion profit.
During that same period, we lost over a trillion dollars.
So if we had a clawback provision, none of us would be getting paid here.
That's funny because the government's not a business like the bank is.
That's funny.
But, you know, hey, first of all, you know, $2 billion.
Let's put this into perspective, folks.
We lose twice that every day on food stamps.
Jimmy, I don't mean to, you know, imply that you're not doing your job, but are you sure that was a clip from the banking committee?
Wasn't that from the testimonial dinner that they gave to Jamie Diamond, the Humanitarian of the Year award?
No, this was a ceremony.
No, this was the Senate Finance Banking Committee, and they're grilling him.
And Jim DeMint, you know, Jim, if only the government could operate with as much reckless disregard for taxpayers as Jamie Dimon does for their customers, maybe they could start to turn a little profit in Congress, is all I'm saying.
That'd be nice.
I really butchered that joke.
I really did.
I tried to put it in the third person instead of the first person, like I'm supposed to.
Well, they butchered that hearing.
So it's a win-win.
Is the reason that Washington is more sympathetic to homosexuals now because they're so gay for Jamie Dimon?
Oh, very nice, Frank.
Very nice.
Okay, there's a little bit more.
He's still got some more to grill him on.
Jim DeMint.
So the intent today is really not to sit in judgment, but to maybe understand better what happened.
My concern, and some of the questions have been very helpful.
As you can tell, there's a temptation here every time something goes amiss that we want to add a regulation.
And we've surrounded the banking industry with so many regulations, and we still seem to have problems here and there.
Yeah, so it's amazing how they've been surrounded with regulations, but they still seem to escape every time, no matter Dinny.
Those are the regulations the banking industry lobbied for to make it hard for the regulators to regulate them.
Yeah, so what they did is that it worked out then.
So what this is going to come up, he's going to talk about this.
What the bankers actually did was they had their lobbyists write the legend, you know, once the bank won't, once the Dodd-Frank went through, so then they have to write the regulations that fit the law.
So what they did was they wrote the regulations in a very complicated manner so as to confuse, keep everyone confused again.
Like, what are you doing?
How does this work?
Even Alan Greenspan can't figure it out.
So they did that on purpose, right, Jim?
Is that what you're talking about?
Yeah, absolutely.
Yeah.
So he goes on to lament that later.
But let's get back to Jim DeMint.
I think we do need to recognize that you are a very big bank, the biggest in the world.
You've got very big profits.
Periodically, you're going to have big losses.
And we need to look at that as part of doing business, but also in the context of making sure, as Senator just said, that we don't create additional risk for the taxpayer, which you appear to be in much better fiscal shape than we are as a country.
Bang!
Right?
It's just sticking it right in his face.
Man, bang.
And of course, we also want to make sure not to put the American taxpayer at risk.
And by taxpayer, of course, I mean people earning more than a million dollars an hour.
The real taxpayers.
Yeah, you don't want them.
You want to put them at risk.
I hope Jamie Dimon left that hearing, you know, very contrite about just how great he is.
This isn't actually a hearing.
It's more like an unconditional surrender.
I love the way he just said you guys are at risk for both large loss and profit, and that puts the American taxpayer at risk.
But we're not going to break up the banks.
He basically is saying we're not going to do anything about it.
Yeah, exactly.
They're not going to do anything.
They're not going to do anything about it.
Well, you know, they're treating Jamie Dimon like he's J.P. Morgan Chase, by the way, even though they were too big to fail in 2008, they are now 50% bigger than they were back then.
So too bigger to fail.
Too bigger to fail.
How come it is when I dropped a box of roast beef on the floor when I worked at Arby's?
I got yelled at more than Jamie Dimon.
$2 million.
That's a Frank.
That's a great point.
All right.
Here's Jim DeMint's going to stick it to him again.
Risk is required to make a profit.
You're dealing with a lot of capital that you have to put to work, which certainly is going to experience profits and losses.
And generally, you've done pretty well.
Yes.
So they're really giving it to him.
They keep telling him how well he's done.
You're doing better than us.
Look at all that stuff.
He's only human.
If they were interviewing Charles Manson, they'd say, well, at least you got to meet some great musicians.
You're doing much better than us.
We have a wonderful collection of knives.
You're a good leader.
You know, you're getting out, you're meeting people.
We never leave Washington.
We never leave all.
Good for you, Chuck.
With the delegates.
Now, my question to you guys: is Jim DeMint's a big Tea Party favorite?
Now, the Tea Party people were upset about the bank bailouts.
So, why aren't they upset at Jim DeMint's line of questioning?
And I guess I'll just posit: is it because the Tea Party people don't pay attention?
They don't pay attention, and Jim DeMint is not a black man who's president of the United States.
Let's talk about the real issues, Solyndra.
So, why is that?
Why can't why?
So, the people in the Tea Party, so they're all completely disingenuous, every one of them?
It would sure seem that way.
You're telling me Eric Erickson isn't a straight shooter?
You know, I just want me to say, if Jim DeMint went any easier on Jamie Dimon, they'd be married now.
Get a room.
Okay.
It's very romantic.
It's like Jamie Dimon got a Jim DeMint left on his pillow.
You know, just when you thought it couldn't get any worse, DeMint asks Jamie Dimon to autograph his wallposter.
So, but what did Jamie Dimon have to say?
What did Jamie Diamond?
Here's what Jamie Dimon says, ready?
The only real suggestion I have is: you know, I believe in strong regulation and not always more.
Meaning never more?
Never again.
I believe in strong regulation.
And by strong regulations, I mean no regulations.
And by not always more, I mean never.
Okay, here we go.
More.
It's not more or less.
It's good.
What we set up as a system with more and more regulators, we don't actually know who has jurisdiction over many of the issues we're dealing with anymore.
So when something happens, we're dealing with four or five different regulators.
I would prefer a simple, clean, strong regulatory system.
But if we can't have that, I'd like the rig system that I invented a couple of years ago.
Can we keep that going?
You know, like when we repealed everything.
If we can't have a strong, clear, consistent regulatory system, then let's just keep doing it the way we've been doing it, fellas.
How about that?
If it ain't broke, don't fit it.
It seems to be working out for us.
I'm still getting $23 million a year, and we're losing billions.
So it's working out, right?
These regulations are so complex, they make us try to see the difference between right and wrong.
That's wrong.
Yeah.
Okay, there's actually more of this.
So then Jim DeMint comes right back at him after Jamie Dimon says that, that he's upset.
Oh, I'm sure.
Oh, I can't wait to hear.
So Jamie Dimon's upset with all the complex regulation.
Here Jim DeMint comes right back at him.
A lot of industries that I've worked in, they get together as peer groups to evaluate best practices, to share information with each other.
And is that something that you regularly do with your peers, other banks around the world of how you deal with risk, how these committees should work, what the failures are, is that going on in a way that we used to do a lot more?
Yeah, we used to do a lot more.
And it turns out that cut into our profits.
And so we stopped doing that.
I wonder what that kind of phone call was.
Like they would talk to other banks about their risk strategy.
Hey, this is Jamie Dimon over at Chase.
How's your risk strategy?
Oh, we don't have one.
How's yours?
Me neither.
Talk to you guys later.
All right.
You guys still making tons of money, though, right?
Yes, we are.
Okay, love it.
See you talk to you later.
They get together like trust to fix prices.
Yeah.
I thought Jim DeMint was going to go further.
What I'm saying is that we would get together and collude to form an oligopoly.
Like, that's what he's basically saying.
Yes, yes.
That's what they did.
That is what's happening.
There is an oligopoly.
There's an oligopi in oil.
There's an oligopi in banking.
There's an oligopi in telecommunications.
There's an oligopi in energy.
What am I missing?
This country's run by a handful of plutocrats who are ahead of oligopies.
I love that.
Oligopoly.
And don't forget Stan Laurel and Oligopoly Harvard.
Just because it starts with an O-Frank doesn't mean it's a joke.
Okay.
Oligalopoly.
Okay.
Here we go.
Jamie Dimon's got a little bit more to say.
Here we go.
We have constant conversations with our regulators.
They're constantly asking for feedback and rules.
We send them a lot of analysis and detail and stuff like that.
I like how he goes.
We send them a lot of analysis and detail, stuff like that.
Stuff they can understand.
And the problem is the regulations are so complicated.
And obviously, his company can't afford to hire people to go through the rig, to read them, and develop a plan for dealing with the regulations and dealing for a plan to do things that are not out of the bounds of ethics.
If he had some cash lying around, maybe he could do something like that.
Oh, wait, no, they do.
They're called FCC compliance officers and they're required in every single one of these trading houses.
Okay.
So he's completely full of it.
Wow, that is a shocker, Robert.
I did not think that Jamie Dimon would be disingenuous.
Okay, he's got a little bit more to say.
He's upset.
There's less.
There's less what, Jim?
Collaboration either among banks and among regulators, among legislators than there used to be.
That's because there shouldn't be.
No, he says this.
It's become much more adversarial.
It becomes much more adversarial.
So he's upset now that we have these regulations.
Everybody's adversarial with each other.
Hey, maybe a little more adversary from the government and the regulators towards Wall Street.
Maybe that would be a healthy thing because we've done it the other way.
Yeah, if the government stood in behalf of the people that they're supposedly representing, that would be very adversarial, and they don't want that.
Yes.
And I think it's adversarial.
Whatever.
But I like adversarials.
I do.
I have an adversarial on my butt.
So here's the last thing.
This is where Jim DeMint just piles on.
You're already beat up on this guy.
He's got a fat lip and a black guy, and he's limping.
And here's what Jim's sake.
Here's what Jim DeMint closes with.
I would like to come away from the hearing today with some ideas on what you think we need to do, what we maybe need to take apart that we've already done to allow the industry to operate better.
Yeah, you know, maybe you could tell us what we need to take apart that we've already done, which would allow your industry to go totally a and why is a senator saying to someone up on the committee, we need you to tell us what we need to do to make things better for you.
That should never even come up.
Okay, so if you want to see what it's like to see a bought government in action, that's what this is.
Mr. Capolet, could you please tell us how we can make it easier for your boats to cross lake?
I mean, it is pretty amazing.
I mean, that's when I was watching this and I was watching Senator Corker and Senator DeMint.
I kept feeling like this is what I always pictured happened in other countries, banana republics, right?
And that's what we've turned into.
We're now a banana.
I mean, here is the Senate, right?
And they're completely beholden to this guy.
Completely nothing.
But they're not even trying to cover that up.
That's what's kind of what's shocking.
And they're not even trying.
He's not like Jim DeMint doesn't even come on to give a show for his Tea Party.
It seemed like maybe there was a time when they would have said before that, look, we're going to be kind of hard on you.
We got to put on the show.
We've got to put on the show.
Don't worry about it.
Now they're just like they want the whole world to know how much they love this guy.
I think they're playing directly to the Tea Party because, you know, Tea Party is more anti-government than they are anti-bailing out, I think.
So it's, again, it's seen as politically, you're over the, you're out of bounds if you say that the people in the Tea Party are ignorant, low of information voters, and easily manipulated by the people they think they're standing up against.
Exactly.
So this is the exact people that they think that they're standing up against, like the ruling class and the plutocracy.
Those are the exact people who have manipulated them.
And if you say that to them, like I don't know if you've seen on MSNBC, but there's this woman who writes for the Daily News, which, you know, just because she writes for a horrible newspaper doesn't mean that she's a credible person or you should have her on.
But MSNBC keeps having this SE Cup on their show.
Oh, Jesus.
And it's like today, today they spent 20 minutes arguing with her, and she's just an idiot about gun control.
Yes, about gun control.
And so I immediately tweeted Alex, what's her name, Alex?
Alex Wagner.
Alex Wagner.
And I just said, love you, love your show.
Why do you have to ruin it with SC Cup?
I'm dumber than she is.
Can I come on your show?
*laughter* you
Thank you.
We're joined now by presidential candidate Mitt Romney.
Hi, Jimmy.
I really feel like it's all starting to come together.
That foot I used to stick in my mouth is now being used to kick in Barack Obama's scorny black ass.
Well, not to burst your bubble.
Oh, go ahead and burst it, Jimmy.
I can always buy another one.
I just want to point out that you made a gaffe by criticizing the president for wanting to hire more policemen, more firefighters, and more teachers.
Oh, Jimmy, my vision goes way beyond that.
It does?
Yes.
I also believe that we shouldn't hire more construction workers, cowboys, Indians, trailers, or leather-clad bikers.
Mitt, what are you saying?
I'm saying that we should not hire any people in any profession that could have been represented in the village, people.
See what I did there, Jimmy?
I'm advocating small government and appealing to the anti-gay vote at the same time.
Pretty clever, huh?
Governor, let me put it to you this way.
Right now, there's a huge out-of-controlled fire in New Mexico and Colorado.
Are you saying that having more firefighters on hand to fight that blaze would be a bad thing?
Jimmy, we don't need firefighters taking away our freedom.
What?
The last thing any American needs is some bureaucrat knocking on their door saying, Get up, there's a fire coming.
You have to evacuate your home.
That is an egregious case of governments intruding into private citizens' life.
But what if the house catches on fire, Mitt?
Oh, you know what's worse than fire damage, Jimmy.
No, water damage.
And yet we allow government workers to spray houses with intrusive fire hoses.
People need the freedom to run screaming in terror from a raging inferno or stay home and die from smoke inhalation.
It should be their choice, not the government's.
I have to say, you really seem out of touch with the plight of the average people losing their homes to a fire.
Oh, I resent that, Jimmy.
I am not out of touch.
I understand that it's awful to lose a home, but it's not like most average people only have one home.
They can stay at their beach house or their villa.
Oh, okay.
What about policemen?
Are you saying we shouldn't have more cops on the beat?
Jimmy, private citizens are just as capable as preventing crime as any officer on the government payroll.
Didn't George Zimmerman prove that?
George Zimmerson isn't in jail.
Exactly.
Another example of government interfering with a brave individual trying to make the world safer by stopping an unarmed kid from buying candy in his neighborhood.
I'm afraid to even ask this, but do you honestly believe that we don't need more teachers in our public education system?
Jimmy, let me put it this way: I am worth hundreds of millions of dollars, and I may very well be the next leader of the free world.
I believe that my underwear is magic and that I will one day reside on the planet Cola.
I am living proof that you can get ahead in life while believing some totally ignorant bullhoggy.
Do the hell needs an education.
Well, Governor, thanks for coming on the show.
Well, anytime, Jimmy.
Have a great summer, and thanks for talking to me.
Okay, Governor, aren't you going to do your usual sign-off?
I don't know what you're talking about.
Well, you usually say something really, you swear in a really vulgar way, and it makes us laugh.
Don't usually do that.
Oh, well, you know what?
A lot of times I've been losing my temper lately, and I've been trying to control that, and I've tried to get away from the profanity.
And let's just leave it on friendly terms.
Okay, okay, Governor.
Well, we'll talk to you later this summer.
We'll do, Jimmy.
Oh, and one more thing.
What's that?
I hope you get gay-braped and someone comes along and smacks you in your filthy gutter tits, you motherfucker.
LAUGHTER Ha, ha, ha.
I was waiting for that.
Okay.
Okay, that was Governor Mitt Romney.
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And that's how that works.
So that's how it always works over there, Sherry's Berries.
You type in Jimmy D. You go to B-E-R-R-I-E-S dot com.
Hit the microphone, type in Jimmy D, you get the deal.
Okay.
And if you've ever had Sherry's Berries, you know they're fantastic.
They're really great.
You know, we don't, I don't promote all the products that they asked me to promote.
In fact, I've turned down a few.
But I really love Sherry's Berrys.
One of my favorite things.
So I have no reservations in endorsing that.
So that's a great way to help support the show.
And you know about the other great ways about the Amazon.com link.
If you want to buy some from Amazon, you go to JimmyDoorComedy.com.
There's the Amazon.com link on the right-hand side.
And so, and of course, you can make a direct donation right at JimmyDoorComedy.com.
$20 gets you the CD, really.
It's hilarious.
And a yearly membership, $55 gets you the DVD Citizen Jimmy award-winning.
That's right.
Okay, so don't forget, June 30th, we're going to have Left, Right, and Ridiculous at the Improv Lab in Hollywood.
That's one block west of Crescent Heights on Melrose Avenue, Melrose, one block west of Crescent Heights, the Improv Lab, June 30th.
It's a Saturday, 8 p.m.
There's links up at the website, JimmyDoorComedy.com.
Okay, are you tired of hearing me say jimmydoorcomedy.com?
Because I tell you what, I am.
I wish I didn't have to say it anymore, but I gotta.
All right, thanks for listening.
We recorded this in the studio over at KPFK.
Can you tell the difference?
I don't have to.
It's easier for me to do it there.
It just is easier.
Okay, anyway, who cares, Jimmy?
Do the show.
Let us hear it.
All right, let's get back to the show.
Thanks for your support.
Couldn't do it without you.
And thanks for watching the new show on the Young Turks.
See you June 30th at the Improv Lab.
Okay, welcome back to the Jimmy Door Show.
I am joined in studio by a former writer from the Daily Show, Steve Rosenfield.
Next to him, hilarious comedian from Team Yasamura, Robert Yasamura.
Cross the table, I'm painting a picture.
Former writer for The Daily Show and the author of the new book, the hilarious book, Morning Remembrances.
And how do you, what's the subtitle, Jim?
A collection of mocking obituaries.
You know, I reached my 50th year recently, so I had to have an ogoloscopy.
I recommend that to Frank as well.
That's a good thing to do.
Everybody should do that.
Next to him from CinematicTitanic.com and Mystery Science Theater 3000.
It's Frank Conniff.
And what's coming up on the second half of today's show?
We're going to talk about Mitt Romney.
And he doesn't think that we need more teachers, cops, and firemen.
In fact, he wants less.
And then Russ Limbaugh backs him up on it.
And we talk about that.
We got phone calls from Mitt Romney and Bill O'Reilly.
But right now, Jim Earle is going to delight us with an obituary of a real person.
Yeah, that's right, Jimmy.
This is Danny Evans, founder of the Cracker Barrel restaurant chain.
He died?
Yeah, yes.
Yes, he's dead.
Okay.
Last few months, a couple months.
Okay.
Danny Evans, founder of the Cracker Barrel Restaurant chain, is now offering up his lowest priced meal to hungry travelers, this time in a pine box.
Evans named the Cracker Barrel after the practice of customers in Tennessee who gather that country stores to gossip and play checkers on top of an empty barrel stuffed with dead civil rights workers.
LAUGHTER After going public in 1981, the Cracker Barrel became a stock market darling with a certain investment sector.
Unfortunately, that sector dealt mainly with lap bands.
That's a funny one.
Year after year, the restaurant won rave reviews in magazines like Nation's Restaurant News and Destinations.
And year after year, people would not read magazines like Nation's Restaurant News and Destinations.
In 1991, Evans ordered all his restaurants to fire employees, quote, whose sexual preferences failed to demonstrate normal heterosexual values, unquote.
Ironically, the directive coincided with the introduction of his most popular southern confection to date, the Lingam Pecan Log.
Fluffy, cherry-laced, phallocentric nougat wrapped in fresh caramel and latex.
Evans' last request was that his brain matter be inserted into old-fashioned glass jars and sold to hungry truck drivers up at the outset.
Yay!
And that is from the new book, Morning Remembrance.
That's right.
Rest in peace.
Rest in peace by Jim Earl.
And Jim, where can people pick up that book?
Just Google it on the internet and you can get that.
Or there are five real bookstores in LA who are selling it.
Oh, you're kidding?
That people can walk into a brick and mortar store?
Yeah, like Stories Books in Echo Park.
Really?
Or the Skylight books?
Oh, that's Wacko?
Wacko?
That's fantastic.
Now, can they get it?
Is it available at Amazon?
Is it there?
Yeah, they can, but you know, I get much less.
Oh, do you?
A percentage at Amazon.
Oh, I'm sorry, Bob.
You can look that up.
But that's going to be the link I put on the website.
Oh, Create Space.
Oh, Create Space?
Yeah.
Okay, whatever link you want me to put, I'll put up there.
So, Jim, you're going to read another one of those later on in the show?
If there's time.
There's going to be time.
Okay.
There's going to be plenty of time.
In fact, if you've got another one right now ready to go, we could do it.
Do you want to do another one?
Yes, I can do this one.
Okay.
Jim Hazelden, owner of the Segway Company.
Oh.
Is that Segways for Jokes or is that Segway?
No, it was a Segway.
You know, the Segway, the machine?
The motorized revolutionized the world.
Yeah, it's going to change everything.
The Segway.
Sure.
I've written a Segway.
I've never seen one.
You have?
On the street.
Yeah, I rode one in Washington, D.C., all over the mall.
And that's the only way to see D.C., I'll tell you that.
But you can walk.
No.
No, you can't.
No, thanks.
I got a bad hip and my feet hurt.
So I'm going to take the Segway.
And I smashed it, by the way.
I used to make fun of George Bush because he smashed his one time.
It's idiot proof.
And I said, of course he smashed it.
And then I smashed it too.
So I'm just as dumb or smart as our former president.
Oh, I thought you were talking about your hip.
Okay, let's go.
I am hip.
Jim Hazelden, owner of the Segway Company.
Jim Hazeldon, owner of the Segway Company, is no longer owner of the Segway Company.
Little did he know when he bought the company last December that he'd be buying the farm this month.
Witnesses say Hazelden was riding one of his scooters when it apparently scooted him over a 50-foot cliff into a river of scooter death.
Police found his body near the rectum machine where paramedics pronounced him hilarious.
LAUGHTER LAUGHTER APPLAUSE LAUGHTER LAUGHTER According to the investigation.
According to the investigation, officials said his multiple injuries were consistent with that of an idiot.
A generous man, Hazelden is credited with donating over a thousand Segways to disabled veterans who are now trying to unload them on the Taliban.
In case you've never driven one, you lean forward to go forward, lean back to go backward, and lean left to lurch suddenly down a 50-foot cliff into a ravine.
LAUGHTER His death highlights five safety precautions riders should take when using a Segway.
Number one, don't buy one.
Number two, if you do buy one, don't buy one.
Number three, okay, so you bought one.
Now put it in storage.
And number four, always wear brightly colored clothing so police can easily find your mangled body at the bottom of a ravine.
And number five, if you wake up in the middle of the night to find one hovering over your bed, do not make eye contact.
Remember, as Judy Garland well documented in her experience filming The Wizard of Oz, the little Segways are incorrigible pranksters who have insatiable sexual appetites.
Try to distract their attention with cigars and alcohol.
Then back slowly away while they pass out with their erections in their hand.
Hazeldon requested his body be wrapped.
Hazeldon requested his body be strapped to a Segway and stuck in a cornfield to scare away crows.
God bless.
That's a great one.
That's from the book Morning Remembrance.
Morning Remembrance.
And what's the subtitle, Jim?
A collection of mocking obituaries.
With an afterword by Rachel Maddow.
Oh.
An afterward.
A foreword by Mark Marin.
Wow.
Cover by Tony Millionaire.
Wow.
And copiously illustrated by Nathan Smith.
Nobody's ever heard of, but he's great.
Wow.
Barry Lank made a commentary.
What do you call it?
Gooseberry Lank.
Annotation.
An annotation by Barry Loma.
Jim's Old Comedy Park.
You know Barry Lank?
Yes.
Well, I know the Barry Lank of the Lanks, of the New York Links.
Yes.
So President Obama made a big gaffe last week when he said that the private sector is doing fine, which to me was the equivalent of when John McCain said that the fundamentals of our economy are strong.
And then Barack Obama never let him forget about that.
And so now Barack Obama said the private sector is doing fine, which was probably the dumbest thing he's ever said.
Would you guys agree that's the dumbest thing he's ever said?
I think that was a little out of context.
He said the private sector is okay.
He says the public sector has problems.
The private sector is okay.
He said they're doing fine.
I think he said the public sector is okay.
I'm not sure.
Yeah, he said it's doing fine.
He said exactly the verbatim quote is the private sector is doing fine.
I think he meant relative to.
Well, he's not an idiot.
I mean, McCain admitted that he didn't have any economic expertise, whereas Obama, I think, is sharper on that.
I don't think he should be nailed for that so much.
Let's be fair.
The private sector is holding $2 trillion.
That's going nowhere.
I think they're doing fine.
Okay, the private sector is, we still have our unemployment, which the real unemployment, they say, is somewhere in the teens, but the ones that count is up over above 8%.
So how could you say that?
You know, you're the president.
You're not some economist on a talk show.
You're not SE Cup on MSNBC.
You're the president, and everything you say is really important.
Right.
It was a gaffe.
And I've said this before about even though all the stuff Mitt Romney says is all gaffes.
It's all stupid.
I do think that the media obsesses too much over these things, over the fact that someone said something the wrong way or said something in a way that wasn't.
But don't you think that people will look at that as – Absolutely.
But I'm just saying that and that it should be noted, but I don't like it when that and with Romney too, you know, when the stupid thing that they said become, that drives the news cycle for the next week.
You mean like when he said that thing about, but I don't.
You know what?
Frank, I'll disagree with you on this point.
Like when he said that when he said that my wife Ann drives a couple of Cadillacs, I think that reveals him.
It does reveal him, but what reveals him much more is his policies or lack of them.
Yes.
And also the fact that just about everything that comes out of his mouth is a lie, which they never talk about.
It is.
Except for Rachel Maddow, speaking of which.
She talks about how just about everything Mitt Romney says is a lie, but most of the media, like, you know, they'd rather focus on that he said this dumb thing.
And it does reveal stuff about him, but it isn't what should be the dominant thing in our disc, although it should be the dominant thing for us comedians.
I do think it's a bigger story if Obama commits a gaffe because he's committed, what, three of them in three years?
You know, I mean, he hardly does it when Romney does it all the time.
So the idea that, oh, Obama committed a gaffe, I suppose it's a big problem.
Well, to me, the idea of Obama gaffe is I smoke pot and did blow, but I'm not going to legalize marijuana.
Or I, you know, I'm I have a kill list and I'm sending drones to kill people and giving away single payer.
Yeah, or, you know, we're going to do away with habeas corpus.
We're not going to prosecute the Bush people for their, I mean, those are things that I would love it if got focused on all the time.
But the fact that he made something that was a dumb thing to say, but that he didn't really mean, you know, it's not as big a deal to me.
But I don't think he, do you think he didn't mean that?
I think it was an inelegant way of he was trying to express that he really thought we could get the economy moving again with more public sector jobs, and the Republicans are preventing that.
It was a comparison, I think, to the public sector.
And by the way, he's right.
I mean, the stock market is doing very well.
Right, but that's not what he said.
He said the private sector is doing well, and we have teen, you know, mid-teens unemployment.
You can't say that.
You can't.
He should have said something like, yes, the private sector is now is adding jobs, whereas the public sector is shedding jobs, so we have to correct that.
Or the real drag in our economy right now is that the public sector has shed so many jobs, we've got to add more teachers, cops, and firemen.
That is so much different than saying that the private sector is doing fine.
And I just can't believe he freaking said that.
But what I can't believe, well, let's go ahead and let me let me.
So Mitt Romney totally capitalized on it.
And here's what he said.
Here's what he said.
He wants to add more to government.
He wants another stimulus.
He wants to hire more government workers.
He says we need more firemen, more policemen, more teachers.
Did he not get the message of Wisconsin?
The American people did.
It's time for us to cut back on government and help the American people.
Well, that isn't a gaffe.
That's just pure absurdity from start to finish.
Yeah.
You know, because the idea, because more stimulus would help help our country, I mean, Romney in that statement is saying, let's not do anything and make our country better.
He's saying, let's cut another half message.
Yeah, and make it complete, it's complete absurdity.
It's nonsense.
It's complete nonsense.
And I think the only thing that makes it worse is Barack Obama's seeming inability to counteract what Mitt Romney is saying.
His inability to let his inability to even win the war in the media about that the stimulus created jobs.
He can't, the people don't think that.
People think the opposite.
You know why?
Because Barack Obama has no message.
He doesn't have a message system.
He doesn't have a message machine.
And how can you be alive in this political culture and going up against the Republicans who are so disciplined and so good at this, so good at winning the war and of the rhetorical war in the media?
Because they're willing to lie.
They're willing to bully lie at every turn.
But it's not that, Robert.
It's that they're willing to have a message repeated over and over again.
Right, but that's like a big political skill.
But I think Obama's been hampered by the fact that he doesn't spend all his time on his political machine.
He's trying to govern a lot of the time.
But aren't there people who that's all they do for him is worry about the political machine?
And so where the hell are they?
I don't know.
I mean, I don't think that it's that his political standing is as bleak as you say it is.
And also, by the way, let me ask you this, Frank.
Do you think the American people are aware of what the stimulus did?
I think some of them are.
Not as many as should be.
But part of it is that isn't just messaging.
It's that the stimulus wasn't big enough.
But it didn't work.
The people who did get jobs from the stimulus are aware of it.
But all the people who aren't working, regardless of the stimulus, it doesn't affect them.
So they don't realize it.
And that's a bigger reason, I think, than the messaging about it.
I don't know if half the people who half the union members in the recent recall election did not vote for Walker.
I'm not sure what to do with the Recall.
Yeah, something's really wrong with the message.
Well, also, by the way, the Wisconsin thing, they don't have any election regulation there.
So Scott Walker had a ginormous war chest.
Yeah, so he spent all that money.
Yeah, he spent all that money before they even picked who was going to run against him.
And a lot of people said that they had made up their minds before the campaign even started for governor in Wisconsin.
And that was a big problem there.
He got outspent seven to one, $33 million to $3 million.
I don't know how that works out to seven, but that's what everybody says.
But if you're a member of the union and you're voting to keep your union, you don't vote against keeping your union.
I mean, Jim, it's just crazy.
Jim, here's what I thought.
So they say about 35% of the electorate is Republican, 35% is Democrat, and everybody else falls in the middle.
That's what they say.
And so when 37% of the people voted for Scott Walker, I just think it was, again, there's dumb people, but I think that they're religious.
A lot of them are Republican.
There's union members who are Republican.
You have to remember that.
And that they're also religious.
So it's the abortion thing comes into play.
So I'm not going to vote for a liberal because I'm against abortion, even though it doesn't matter, has nothing to do in this race.
So I think that's how you get that.
But again, Barack Obama wouldn't go to Wisconsin, wouldn't go there, wouldn't bring his money.
He doesn't have a message to bring.
He doesn't have a message to bring.
Okay, here's what Russ Limbaugh had to say about Mitt Romney, what Mitt Romney just said.
He said, okay, here we go.
Nobody is opposed to cops or firefighters or teachers.
Okay, I don't know if you heard this.
He says we need more firemen, more policemen, more teachers.
Did he not get the message of Wisconsin?
The American people did.
Okay, so when Rush Limbaugh says this.
Nobody is opposed to cops or firefighters or teachers.
Except for Mitt Romney is what he means to say.
Except he means to say Mitt Romney.
Unless you listen to what Mitt Romney said.
Yeah, and everybody else in the Republican Party.
But they aren't private sector jobs.
They do not contribute to economic growth.
Again, this is what...
When a teacher gets paid, they don't spend that money in their communities or their cities.
They spend that money in an alternate universe somewhere, and somewhere where their money doesn't go into the economy.
Is that what I'm supposed to believe here?
Is that what he's saying?
That's what he's saying.
Well, and also if cops are working and they put their salary into the economy and also their bribes they put into the economy.
I'm kidding.
I watch too many movies.
I'm not putting down cops.
And guess what?
Unless your community contains an Arby's or a rehab, Rush Limbaugh doesn't contribute to their growth either.
Or a pharmacy.
I just, I don't know.
Oh, my God.
Your community is safe and your schools are great.
I don't want to move my business there.
Yeah, also teachers who would hopefully make a decent salary in a union would stimulate the economy.
And then they would maybe help kids get educated who would create things like Apple computers or whatever or would go on to do things that would help our country.
But uneducated kids aren't going to end up doing anything to help our economy.
They're going to be a drag on the economy.
So you're saying education equals a better economy.
I don't know how it came to be that I would be the spokesman for education because I was such a horrible student.
But it's like it's turned around.
It's like the Republican Party is on the side or on my side from when I was like a surly teenager who hated school.
They're like expressing what I used to stupidly express when I was a teenager.
School sucks, man.
You know, teachers, who needs them?
You know, nobody needs to go to school.
And in that day and age, the conservatives would be opposed to me.
They'd be like, you're a loser.
You're not going to school.
You're hating school.
But now it's all turned around.
And those people would be on the side of my hippie stoner loser 17-year-old self.
Well, I agree.
It's like, you know, it's the same thing watching Jim DeMint question Jamie Dimon.
It's like, oh, like the jerk from school who's scamming everybody somehow gets to put on a suit and tie and he's respectable.
You're just a jerk.
You're just like that guy who's who you're a scammer.
You're a mafia guy.
It's like the hero of our nation is Eddie Haskell.
Yeah.
Did I tell you about the time Mitt Romney pinned me down and cut my pubic hair?
The Jimmy Dora show is available as a podcast for free on iTunes.
Or for other ways to subscribe, go to jimmydoorcomedy.com.
And while you're there, you can listen to past episodes and you can comment on them too.
Remember, Jimmy spells his last name, D-O-R-E, jimmydorecomedy.com.
Bill O'Reilly gave us a jingle, Bill O'Reilly.
Damn it, Jimmy Dore, answer the phone.
Hello, this is Jimmy.
Answer the phone, you coward.
I don't want to talk to you, damn machine.
It's not a machine, Bill.
It's me, Jimmy Dore.
Damn it, Jimmy Dore, answer the phone.
Bill, have you been drinking?
Defined have you been?
Okay, I'm hanging up.
No, I have not been drinking Jimmy Door's answering machine.
You know, I'm on step eight of the program.
I'm glad to hear that, Bill.
What's step eight?
Drinking in your machine's fanny store.
If only you were there, because then you'd feel the full force of my righteous outrage.
Okay, I'll bite.
What's the problem now?
Millionaire public school teachers living off our time, raiding the corpus, getting a free ride, robbing a spline, taking my money.
In other words, they paid way, way, way, way, way too much.
And for what?
I said, way five times, Jimmy.
But, Bill, the average public school teacher gets around $35,000 a year working in crumbling schools and overcrowded classrooms.
Don't they deserve our respect and better pay?
Wait a minute.
This isn't your answering machine, is it?
No, Bill.
Listen and listen carefully.
Whoever or whatever you might be, the only people who deserve the money they earn are the ones who inherited it.
I'll say.
But, Bill.
When my dad put me through that private woman Catholic high school years ago, I never thought, I never thought Sister Mary John Wayne gave you.
Wow, holy crap.
I think I drank some of those bass swapps.
Seriously.
Okay, Bill, I gotta go.
Listen, it's been nice.
Jimmy, way.
Two jewels walk into a bar and the disloyal.
heard that one from Richard Nixon.
Okay.
Okay.
Ha, ha, ha.
No, don't leave me alone with my thoughts.
All right, goodbye, goodbye, Bill.
I'm eating my face!
LAUGHTER *laughs* Okay, Jim, go ahead and let's get one more of those.
You got one more of those morning remembrances?
Yeah.
Harry Wesley Coover Jr., inventor of super glue.
After a prolonged illness, Harry Wesley Coover Jr., inventor of super glue, is now super dead.
Doctors fought bravely throughout his illness to reduce cranial swelling, but no matter how hard they tried, they could never get his cap off.
Super glue.
Before long, they knew he only had a matter of days, mainly because his face was so pasty.
Coover's wife was the first to discover the body, so naturally she became totally unglued.
A spokesman denied rumors he was discovered alone in his bedroom, lying next to a large stack of stroke mags with his hand stuck to his Coover.
The inventor, the inventor, was once described as, quote, one of the true legends of the adhesive industry, unquote.
Of course, this was immediately followed by derisive laughter.
Legend has it, Coover invented superglue in 1951 after carelessly dropping a used pair of Walter Brennan's underwear into a Reese's peanut butter cup.
You know, the original, the original, hey, gang, the original mixture consisted of monomers of methyl 2 cycloencyclite rate molecules with a molecular weight equal to or greater than 111.1.
Phew, is it just me or are you getting horny?
Over the years, Coover's super glue has been used to repair millions of everyday items, but sadly, it can never mend a broken heart.
At his eulogy, Coover's children recounted many fond memories of growing up in a happy home where the walls were always covered with patches of torn human skin.
Friends found the memorial very enjoyable, and when it came to time to bury him, well, everybody just had to stick around.
Stick around.
Super glue.
Coover requested his remains be placed in a brown paper bag so neighborhood teens can use it for kicks.
That's the end of that one.
Yay!
June 30th, Saturday, June 30th, 8 p.m.
Improv Lab is the next left, right, and ridiculous.
With all the folks you love from the Jimmy Door show, plus some surprise guests, Paul Gilmartin doing his jackass Republican character.
We're going to have David Feldman on the panel.
He's always hilarious.
That's the three-time Emmy Award-winning comedy writer.
17 times nominated.
So he's more of a loser than a winner.
But that's going to be June 30th.
That's an 8 p.m. show a Saturday, last Saturday of June at Left Reckon Ridiculous at the Improv Lab.
Links over at the website.
Okay.
Today's show was written by Mike McRae, Jim Earl, Robert Yasimura, Steve Rosenfield, Frank Connoff, and Steph Samurano.
And of course, the voices were done by the inimitable Mike McRae, who can be found at MikeMcRae.com.
Coming to a city near you.
And I want to remind everybody, go check out the Jimmy Doer show at Young Turks.
But you know what?
You don't have to go there.
Just go to the website.
I'll have it up there too.
So when I say the website, I mean jimmydoorcomedy.com.
Okay, so I want to thank Jim Earl for reading the hilarious excerpts from his book, Morning Remembrance.
And I think that's it.
We'll see you next week.
Until then, you, oh, you know what?
I have to do.
I have to thank the two gentlemen who donate their time and talent to this show.
We'll start off with Frank Pulaski from Dreamtime Films.
I don't know why I always used to mess it up that way.
So it's Dreamtime Films.
He's hilarious.
He's a great video editor.
He takes the phone calls we do on the show.
He puts video to them in a hilarious way.
It's Frank Pulaski at Dreamtime Films and another guy who saved my ass again this week.
Again, it's getting to be a weekly thing.
Sean James, if you have a problem with your Macintosh and you don't have time to get to somebody else, he can fix it for you right over the internet.
Even if you do have time, I would go to Sean James.
He can fix it for you right over the internet.
It's kind of amazing to see.
And you can get a hold of Sean by emailing him at MacHelp at SeanJames.com.
And you spell Sean S-H-A-U-N.
Okay, and everybody in Canada will be up there for we're doing a show July 27th with Lewis Black at the Montreal Comedy Festival.
It's a Friday night.
That's a day after my birthday.
Look at that.
So we're doing a show with Lewis Black, a gal event at the Montreal Comedy Festival up in, well, that would be in Montreal, Jimmy, coincidentally enough.
Okay, that's our show.
Thanks for listening.
Till next week, be the best you can be, and I'll keep being me.
Thank you.
We're joined now by presidential candidate Mitt Romney.
Hi, Jimmy.
I really feel like it's all starting to come together.
That foot I used to stick in my mouth is now being used to kick in Barack Obama's scrawny black ass.
Well, not to burst your bubble.
Oh, go ahead and burst it, Jimmy.
I can always buy another one.
I just want to point out that you made a gaffe by criticizing the president for wanting to hire more policemen, more firefighters, and more teachers.
Oh, Jimmy, my vision goes way beyond that.
It does?
Yes, I also believe that we shouldn't hire more construction workers, cowboys, Indians, sailors, or leather-clad bikers.
Mitt, what are you saying?
I'm saying that we should not hire any people in any profession that could have been represented in the village people.
See what I did there, Jimmy?
I'm advocating slow government and appealing to the anti-gay vote at the same time.
Pretty clever, huh?
Governor, let me put it to you this way.
Right now, there's a huge out-of-control fire in New Mexico and Colorado.
Are you saying that having more firefighters on hand to fight that blaze would be a bad thing?
Jimmy, we don't need firefighters taking away our freedom.
What?
The last thing any American needs is some bureaucrat knocking on their door saying, Get up, there's a fire coming.
You have to evacuate your home.
That is an egregious case of governments intruding into private citizens' life.
But what if the house catches on fire, Mitt?
Oh, you know what's worse than fire damage, Jimmy?
No.
Water damage.
And yet we allow government workers to spray houses with intrusive fire hoses.
People need the freedom to run screaming in terror from a raging inferno or stay home and die from smoke inhalation.
It should be their choice, not the government's.
I have to say, you really seem out of touch with the plight of the average people losing their homes to a fire.
Oh, I resent that, Jimmy.
I am not out of touch.
I understand that it's awful to lose a home, but it's not like most average people only have one home.
They can stay at their beach house or their villa.
Okay, what about policemen?
Are you saying we shouldn't have more cops on the beat?
Jimmy, private citizens are just as capable as preventing crime as any officer on the government payroll.
Didn't George Zimmerman prove that?
George Zimmermerson isn't in jail.
Exactly.
Another example of government interfering with a brave individual trying to make the world safer by stopping an unarmed kid from buying candy in his neighborhood.
I'm afraid to even ask this, but do you honestly believe that we don't need more teachers in our public education system?
Jimmy, let me put it this way.
I am worth hundreds of millions of dollars, and I may very well be the next leader of the free world.
Yet I believe that my underwear is magic and that I will one day reside on the planet Colob.
I am living proof that you can get ahead in life while believing some totally ignorant bullhonky.
Do the hell meeting education.
Well, Governor, thanks for coming on the show.
Well, anytime, Jimmy, have a great summer, and thanks for talking to me.
Okay, Governor, aren't you going to do your usual sign-off?
I don't know what you're talking about.
Well, you usually say something really you swear in a really vulgar way and it makes us laugh.
Don't usually do that.
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