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May 25, 2012 - Jimmy Dore Show
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Last week, Facebook went public, and like everything else about Facebook, it was a huge letdown.
People are disappointed that it apparently favored large investors over small ones.
Turns out Mark Zuckerberg didn't like us as much as we thought he did.
He was only in it for himself.
He was just pretending to care.
Damn it, he's no better than most of our Facebook friends.
But everybody already knew that Facebook was overvalued.
All you had to do was spend a year or two of your life checking your news feed.
Okay, it's still a great way to keep track of your friend's dogs.
So now Mark Zuckerberg's facing angry investors, lawsuits, and congressional investigations.
We all like to think he's embarrassed about this.
But let's face it, $19 billion buys a lot of dignity.
And how do you make $19 billion on a website anyway?
Everybody I know who has a website is flat broke.
Zuckerberg will get his, though.
He just made the biggest mistake of his life.
He got married.
Now, I didn't see the social network because it's about students at Harvard, and I prefer movies about people with problems.
Over the years, I've worked with Ivy League alumni, and I'm not saying they weren't talented, but my message to Harvard graduates is: please don't become comedy writers.
You went to Harvard.
Find a cure for cancer.
Leave comedy writing to the people who went to state schools.
Music It's the Jimmy Dore Show.
The show for...
Up-minded, lowly-livered lefties.
The kind of people that are...
Hellbentz, maybe, on tearing down our nation.
It's the show that makes Anderson Cooper say...
And now, here's a guy who sounds a lot like me.
It's Jimmy Dore!
Everybody, welcome to this week's episode.
I am joining studio to my right from Mystery Science Theater 3000 and CinematicTitanic.com.
Coming to us, sitting near you.
It's Frank Conniff.
Hi, Frank.
Hello there.
So that's going to be your thing.
That's your thing now.
I open all my salon videos with it.
Oh, by the way, check out Frank Salon videos.
We'll put a link up at the website.
And next to him, the host of the Mental Illness Happy Hour Podcast, chose one of the top 10 podcasts of 2011 by The Onion.
Ladies and gentlemen, it's Paul Gilmartin.
Hey, Paul.
Hello, Jimmy.
Paul, fresh off a hot show last night at the University of California, Riverside.
We were out there doing left, right, and ridiculous.
Paul was doing his jackass Republican character, Representative Richard Martin.
That's right.
It's hilarious.
If you haven't seen it, there's a hilarious video at your website and askerrepublican.com.
Ask a rip.
He's got more than one website.
That's how busy Paul Clubartin is.
Paul, great job last night.
Jeff Funny.
I did have fun, and you were hilarious as well.
Oh, thanks.
I was wondering how long that was going to take.
Next to him, a hilarious comedian, former writer for the Daily Show, Steve Rosenfield is there.
Hey, Steve.
Hey, Jimmy.
How you doing today?
Back from your vacation.
Yes, I was in Boston for a couple of weeks.
Vacation from what?
They don't have to know.
Okay, so let's do a couple of jokes at the top of the show.
Hey, did you hear that there's a new study that says Fox News viewers are the most ignorant and ill-informed of all news viewers, which means they qualify to be Fox News anchors.
Right?
Hey, Corey Booker, by the way, Corey Booker, you heard what happened with him, and he got into a big flap last week on Meet the Press when he came out against Barack Obama.
Anyway, the whole point is he was actually at that show last night in UC Riverside.
He said he vomited all through our show, but then afterwards, he said he liked us.
So if you know what Corey Booker did last week, that's funny.
That is right.
And we're going to, so what's coming up on today's show?
We got some crazy stuff in the Oh My God segment.
Yes, they hate the gays still.
And abortion comes up.
Plus, we're going to take a look at Corey Booker and his horrible job of representing the Obama administration on Meet the Press.
And then we're going to talk about, guess what?
It's the Catholics.
Again, they're at it again.
That's right.
Yes, the Cardinal of New York City says he's worried that they won't be able to remain a church because of Obamacare's mandate that makes them provide access to contraception for their employees.
Hey, Cardinal, don't worry.
As long as you keep moving child molesters from parish to parish, you'll still be a church.
Okay, so that's coming up.
Plus, we got phone calls from Corey Booker today.
Mitt Romney calls in, plus a lot more.
That's today on the Jimmy Dore show.
Time for another installment of Oh My God.
Okay, so let's just dive right into this week's.
We have two clips on this week's Oh My God.
And first, we're going to hate the gays a little bit.
Here we go.
The Bible, again, it's right every time, and studies keep proving that.
And that's why AIDS has been something they have discovered a cure for or vaccine for.
Yeah.
Because it's the fastest self-mutating virus known to mankind.
Every time they just about get a virus, a vaccine discovered in some way.
It transmutes into something new, and they have to start over again.
And that goes to what God said.
Hey, you're going to bear in your body the consequences of this homosexual behavior.
Yeah, so God gave AIDS to punish the gays.
And I guess that would just mean that God gave cancer to punish the straits.
Exactly.
Because every time they get close to solving cancer, boom, it just transmutates and they can't solve it.
That's the argument that, you know, whenever they say that, oh, it's God's punishment.
The tornado is God's punishment.
What about when people who you think are good Christians get cancer and have horrible things happen?
What did they do that got God so mad?
So God is such, Scott is such an impatient prick that he can't wait a couple of years for you to go to hell.
Exactly.
He's got to come and give you AIDS while you're still, even though he has all of eternity to punish you.
He can't wait those couple of years.
He's got to jump in while you're still a human being walking around on his earth.
Exactly.
Why doesn't he just kill the people that he doesn't like?
Don't even bother giving them.
Oh, because you want to have health care.
It's going to be really inconvenient.
Yeah, they're going to give you an illness without health care.
I'm going to show you what hell's like before hell happened.
That's the whole thing that none of that stuff ever makes sense.
It's funny that they come down on, to me, this is very close to them coming down on Jeremiah Wright, Reverend Jeremiah Wright, for saying, God damn America, right?
Not God bless America.
Well, because he was referring to the...
Well, isn't that the same thing?
Yeah.
God said no.
It's true.
It's pretty dickish of God to do that, if you ask me.
Yeah, so that would be my response if I was the Barack Office.
They didn't run, launch that Jeremiah Wright campaign against him.
I would just show those two guys.
Here are these guys saying that God did the same thing.
The point here is all religious people are a little crazy.
Yes.
Yes.
Okay, here we go.
All right.
So we got through that one.
Here's another one.
Here's a guy from Mississippi talking about how they got rid of abortion in Mississippi.
I hope you can hear him.
Okay, here we go.
We have literally stopped abortion in the state of Mississippi.
The only clinic is in stop.
Could you make that out?
He said we have literally stopped abortion in the state of Mississippi.
We live from the capital since the only abortion clinic in the state of Mississippi.
A bill was drafted and it said if you would do it.
They have one abortion clinic in the whole state of Mississippi, and it's six blocks from the Capitol.
Wow.
isn't that something Boy, he's got an accent.
It's really.
They also have an arrow that says you must be this tall to ride the stirrups.
I've kept waiting to hear it announce.
He goes, about this time, the old Duke boy stopped abortion in the state.
I thought pretty soon he's going to start talking about when he went and killed that gator.
And so he's saying that they, I don't know if you can make out, but what he's saying is they passed a law in Mississippi that says you can't be an abortion doctor unless you have admitting privileges to a hospital.
And he says we all know how hard that is to get.
So he's basically saying that we're screwing over something that's legal in America.
We're going to make it illegal through this impossible hoops for these people to jump through.
He's got some more to say.
It's going to be challenged, of course, in the Supreme Court law.
Literally, we stopped abortion in the state of Mississippi legally without any way.
So we've done that.
I was proud of the government signed it in the law.
And of course, they're down the other side.
They're like, well, the poor pitiful women that can't afford to go out of state are just going to start doing the homeland code there.
That's what we learned over and over and over.
So he said, what we've heard from the other side is that poor women who can't afford to go out of state for their abortions are just going to use a coat hanger at home.
We've heard that over and over and over.
But hey, you have to have moral values.
You have to start somewhere, and that's what we decided to do.
He goes, but hey, you got to have moral values.
You got to start somewhere.
And that's what we decided to do.
So we decided to start implementing our moral values on the most vulnerable people in society, the people least able to take care of their medical practices.
That's who's going to pay the brunt.
Not rich people, not middle-class people who can have the money to go out of state and get their abortions.
What we're going to do is these poor people who can't even afford to go out of state to have an abortion, we're going to make it so they have to have a kid also on top of their poorness, and then we're going to take away their welfare.
You've got to start somewhere.
Let's start with the poor.
Let's start with the poorest of poorest of the poor, people who can't even afford to leave the state to get an abortion.
And let's make sure that that kid grows up in poverty.
Let's make sure that happens.
And then let's make sure that if he goes up for adoption or winds up in an orphanage, that no gays can adopt him.
Yeah, yeah.
It's exactly, it's a whole web of Jesus.
It's like the luge for an unwanted child, just making sure they get safely to prison.
This has been, oh my God.
Oh, my God.
Okay, so Mitt Romney's been having a hard time.
People don't want to endorse him.
People are reluctant.
George Bush, when he endorsed him, he was getting on an elevator.
And that's how he endorsed him.
He's like, I'm for Romney.
And then the doors, and then the doors close.
Why are people reticent to vote for a robot who appears desperate and has no clue as to foreign policy?
You know, Paul, it's a headache.
It's crutched.
It's just plain moderate robot instead of a right-wing robot.
Yeah, you know what?
It's class warfare is what it is.
And, you know, Mitt Romney, he is, he's got to be the most unpopular Republican nominee since the last one.
And so here he's so, but guess what?
He turns tables.
He doesn't even want to mention George because the only guy more unpopular than Mitt Romney right now is George Bush.
Still, he left office, one of the lowest approval ratings of the history of the presidency.
He's been ranked as 38th by historians as his ranking as presidents.
I want to know who's 39th, 40th, and 40.
You know what I mean?
Really?
Someone was worse?
I know Grant wasn't any good, but still.
So here we go.
Mitt Romney won't mention George Bush's name, won't mention it.
Listen to how he refers to him, right?
He was very critical of his predecessor for the debts the predecessor put in place.
He was very critical of his predecessor because the predecessor put together $4 trillion of debt.
So he keeps, let's play that again.
He was very critical of his predecessor for the debts the predecessor put in place.
He was very critical of his predecessor because the predecessor put together a picture of debt.
How many pickled peppers could a predecessor pick if a predecessor could pick Becklepeckerpecker?
It's amazing.
It's like him saying it the second time is what really gives it away.
He's going to bring jobs selling seashells down by the south.
Oh!
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Okay, so now Corey Booker.
Okay, so Corey Booker goes on Meet the Press, Press the Meet, as I like to call it, with David Gregory.
And I always like to point out, people aren't aware of this, but David Gregory is part of the press that they're supposed to be meeting.
Yes.
So Corey Booker.
Is she still the mayor of Newark?
Corey Booker is the mayor of Newark, Corey Booker.
And he went on as Obama's surrogate.
So he's on to report.
Self-appointed or no, no, sent by the administration.
Sent by the administration.
He's been friends with Obama for a long time.
Yeah, yeah.
So it's not anymore.
So it's been worked out that he was going to go on as their representative.
And so he goes on.
And, you know, so one of Barack Obama's main ways to attack Mitt Romney is that he's going up and talking about his Bain Capital years and about how what he really did was extract wealth out of America.
He didn't really build jobs, right?
So he's been attacking their what they call it, private equity firms, right?
So here's what Corey Booker had to say about that.
Oh, by the way, it was revealed that there were some right-wingers that were trying to plan on using Jeremiah Wright against Barack Obama, even though it happened four years ago.
They say we didn't, John McCain didn't do it hard enough, which he didn't, according to them.
Their new thing is Obama wasn't vetted.
Yeah, we have to vet.
We have to vet.
We have to vet Barack Obama because he wasn't vetted the first time.
It's like, well, don't you think three and a half years as president is vetting?
Hasn't he been vetted?
We already got a whole term.
We know what he's going to be like.
It's not like he was thoroughly vetted like Sarah Palin.
Right.
They're still trying to connect him to Willie Horton.
Okay.
So here's what Corey books.
So Corey Booker, so they came out that they wanted to use the Jeremiah Wright thing, which to me, and some people would disagree with me on this, but I think that using the Jeremiah Wright thing is a subtle form of race baiting.
Just like the long-form birth certificate is a subtle form Of race baiting, and I want to see his records from Occidental.
Because it's all about he's not, he's black, so he can't really be an American.
And he's got a Muslim name, so even though he sat in a Christian church for 20 years, we're going to use it against him both ways.
Anyway, so here's what Corey Booker had to say about both those campaign lines of attack.
This kind of stuff is nauseating to me on both sides.
It's nauseating to the American public.
Enough is enough.
Stop attacking private equity.
Stop attacking Jeremiah Wright.
This stuff has got to stop because what it does is it undermines to me what this country should be focused on.
It's a distraction from the real issues.
It's either going to be a small campaign about this crap or it's going to be a big campaign, in my opinion, about the issues that American public cares about.
Wow, nauseating, which from a guy from Newark, the bar said pretty high on what nauseating is.
And it's so true because those two things, Jeremiah Wright and attacking Mitt Romney's main capital, those are exactly the same thing, right?
Because in one instance, a multi-multi-multi-millionaire put his private sector experience at the top of his qualifications to become president.
And then his actual opponent criticized said private sector experience.
In the other instance, a guy went to a church where another guy said some things that people found objectionable and political operatives played it on a continuous loop to scare the jingoists.
It's like the president and Romney are the exact same person.
Is it not?
I mean, come to think of it, you've never seen them in the same room together.
Think about it.
Okay, so that's what Corey.
By the way, one side question.
When did we all start clamoring to hear what the mayor of Newark had to say?
Corey Booker, though, I mean, he is a substantial person.
He's done some really good things in Newark.
He lived in the projects, and he's been an advocate for some really good things.
So it's not like he's just an average political hack.
Right, but what you're saying there undermines the joke I said previously.
So if you can hold it, cut it up.
Okay, we'll cut that out.
He's just, Horry Booker just is the worst.
I don't like him.
Thank you very much.
Okay.
Woof.
Woof.
I mean, I don't understand, though.
You know, but there's a lot of things I don't understand.
But I don't understand how, if he was a surrogate for Obama, how he could have allowed himself to say that when he knew that they wouldn't have been happy about that because it was a major campaign strategy to go after Bain.
I don't get that at all.
That's puzzling.
It was very puzzling.
We can only speculate.
And so the speculation seems to be that my first speculation was, oh, he's from Newark.
He's sucking up to these private equity guys.
He wants to be one of them.
He's the new Harold Ford, right?
He wants to be a Democrat who's in bed with Wall Street.
He's the new Barack Obama.
Also known as a Democrat.
Also known as a Democrat.
Very good, Paul.
So that's all I thought it was.
But let me just say this about Corey Booker, about how you were saying that he actually is.
Was the Newark mayor's race the ultimate campaign of big ideas?
That's my question, because I'm pretty sure the biggest idea in Newark has always been, how do I get the fuck out of the Newark?
Well, he's enacted transportation reform that's going to help that happen for people.
And don't look back.
But he is right, though.
If there's one thing that American masses seem to crave and understand, it's the complexities and nuances of actual policy, isn't it?
Hey, by the way, did you know that Battleship did poorly this weekend?
Yeah, it was beat out by a simulcast lecture of supply-side economics.
Give the people what they want.
Neck and neck with another simulcast of the future of labor in the 21st century.
That's what Americans really want to know about.
Okay.
So Mitt, so Corey Booker said that, that he gets nauseated by that, made a false equivalency.
That was the most egregious thing was the false equivalent.
Yes.
I think so.
I think so.
And then so then he's.
I don't mind that he's like express, if that's his opinion.
I don't think he should express that opinion if he was hired to represent.
Yeah, I mean, politically, it was all wrong, but I feel that it's a purely political gaffe.
And when the media makes such a big deal about a purely political gaffe, it overwhelms more important things.
But I do think the false equivalency between what Mitt Romney was doing and what Obama was doing, that was very egregious.
So he said that he was nauseated, and then the Republicans immediately put out a commercial using him saying that stuff.
So he went on Rachel Maddow the next night to try to backpedal.
And here's how he put it.
Forget it.
So here's what he was saying.
Why did you come on the show?
Forget it.
I've had all I can stand and I can't stand no more.
Okay, so he went from being nauseated at Barack Obama to not being able to stand the Republicans.
So this guy gets pushed past his breaking point on a daily basis, apparently, right?
That's always throwing up.
So let's recap.
He went from this.
This kind of stuff is nauseating to me on both sides.
To this.
It's gotten so ridiculous.
You can't even equate the negativity on the right with what's happening by some sectors in the left.
Wow, sounds like somebody got some peptobismol, right?
Let's play that again.
He went from this.
This kind of stuff is nauseating to me on both sides.
On both sides, nauseating.
It's gotten so ridiculous.
You can't even equate the negativity on the right with what's happening.
But you just did the previous night.
You can't even do it.
You can't even.
Unless you do it.
He's a political bulimic.
Very dice.
Very dice.
So let's just, here's a little, here's a little different way, I'll say it.
He said this.
This is a little different.
This kind of stuff is nauseating to me on both sides.
It's nauseating to the American public.
Enough is enough.
Stop attacking private equity.
Stop attacking Jeremiah Wright.
This stuff has got to stop because what it does is it undermines to me what this country should be focused on.
It's a distraction from the real issues.
It's either going to be a small campaign about this crap or it's going to be a big campaign, in my opinion, about the issues that American public cares about.
Okay, and he went from that to then go ahead.
I was just going to be devil's advocate for a second, just for one part of it.
You know, private equity in and of itself isn't a bad thing.
Buying a company, breaking it down, restructuring it, making it leaner and meaner and healthier for the sake of capitalism.
Well, that's the dice that we roll by living in a capitalistic society, as long as it's done legally.
The problem I have with it is him portraying it as if he is creating jobs, which he's not.
No, he's not.
But call it what it is, which is you are getting rid of the fat, which sometimes also involves people making a living.
And also, he was doing what he set out to do was to make a load of money for him and his pals.
And that's, you know, but that's not a qualification to be president, if you can pull that off.
That's what Barack Obama has been saying.
His comeback to that is like, yeah, well, that's not my job as president to make sure I don't have investors that want to return.
I have to make sure that everybody's taken care of.
I can't just take care of a certain handful of people.
I have to make sure everyone's taken care of.
Because Mitt Romney would make a great business school professor.
That's what he's qualified.
And let me also just say this.
Now, I don't claim to know everything that how Mitt Romney ran those companies, you know, when he would buy a company, but I did see Robert Wright kind of explain it.
And all I know is that I trust Robert Wright, right?
And he said that the way Mitt Romney ran that business was kind of, you know, not really that ethical.
And a lot of those instances where they would come in, buy a company, and then borrow heavily against that company.
So they would kind of intentionally bankrupt it.
And somehow they were able to extract millions and hundreds of millions of dollars out of each of those things.
In the meantime, laying people off and getting rid of.
That I was not aware of.
So I wasn't either.
So I'm like, I thought they were just going in and making it more efficient.
That's what I thought.
But it turns out, no, they would do this thing where they would borrow hundreds of millions of dollars to kind of intentionally bankrupt this company.
So I don't really acclaim it.
Who lends them that money?
After they do it once, who lends them money again?
That's what I thought.
I'm thinking the same thing when Robert Reich.
I'd have to get Robert Reich out of the phone.
I think that's what I'm going to have to do.
Well, you know, that's why this Booker thing is so annoying to me: he's talking about morally how it's immoral to attack Romney for what he did with Bain when that's, you know, clearly immoral.
And Booker's.
And I think Booker should know that.
Booker was saying, though, that you shouldn't attack private equity.
He wasn't saying he wasn't specifically referring to Romney and Bain Capital.
Equity meaning money?
No, the private equity firms.
He was saying that he promotes IPOs for companies and allows entrepreneurs sometimes to bring their ideas to life.
Private equity in and of itself isn't a bad thing.
Right.
But that Obama ad was very specific about what the charge against Romney was.
And he wasn't attacking private equity as a nebulous argument.
I mean, Booker's making the anti-capitalist argument.
Oh, Obama's an anti-capitalist.
It's not his job to make that argument.
Well, the thing that's really sickening, though, is the fact that Obama hasn't done any kind of legislation to address the actual crimes being committed in private equity on Wall Street.
If he's so upset about what his running, his opponent is doing, why have you been in office for three and a half years and not prosecuted a single white-collar person?
Because that would be impolite.
You're kidding me?
That's the real argument.
I'm with you.
I'm with you.
No prosecutions on Wall Street, none whatsoever.
I'm with you, Paul.
Yeah.
So here's so he, so here's Mr. Nauseous, right?
So he was Mr. Nauseous.
And then about, I don't know, five seconds after he got done doing that interview on Meet the Press, he went to his office and he had to put out this.
So this was what they're referring to as a hostage video on Morning Joe.
Here's what he said.
After he just said it's nauseating, it's killing the country.
We've got to get past this stuff.
He then went on and said this.
Mitt Romney has made his business record a centerpiece of his campaign.
He's talked about himself as a job creator.
And therefore, it is reasonable.
And in fact, I encourage it for the Obama campaign to examine that record and to discuss it.
Yeah.
I wish he had said that on Meet the Press.
Why didn't he say that on Meet the Press?
So there he is.
So now that's how he's supposed to really feel.
I think that when you go on Meet the Press, you just tend to say both sides do it because David Gregory loves hearing that so much that you're in an atmosphere where in order to please the host, my host, which is just polite to please your host, I have to make false equivalencies because that's what this show is all about.
And as a politician, he's kind of bent towards pleasing people, right?
Maybe that's it.
Maybe he really did do that.
I saw a headline speaking of, I'm looking for it.
I was just going to say one more thing.
If Obama really wanted to run a true campaign, it would be don't vote for McCain because our party will not be able to stop him.
Or don't vote for Romney because our party will not stand up to him.
Yeah, that's a good point.
I saw a headline in the Washington Post today that said Democrats and Republicans both are horrible or something like that.
You know what?
I'm just looking for it now and I get it.
True.
So, yeah, but in different ways.
Yeah.
And, well, it's a lot of the same ways, too.
Okay.
So, but so people are making a big deal out of like, oh, my God, now Corey Booker said that they already turned it into a commercial.
So it's really going to screw Barack Obama.
And I say, I've got a lot of tape of other people saying just as dumb stuff.
Like, here's Newt Gingrich talking about Mitt Romney.
Is capitalism really about the ability of a handful of rich people to manipulate the lives of thousands of other people and walk off with the money?
Yes.
Or is that, in fact, somehow a little bit of a flawed system?
Oh, okay.
So who was that socialist radical just now?
Wow, when Newt Gingrich.
Yeah, that was Newt Gingrich.
How about Rick Perry?
Here's Rick Perry.
We need to have more venture capitalism going on in America and less vulture capitalism.
Okay, so then Barack Obama could show that.
How about that?
That was unbelievable.
Rick Perry completed a sentence.
Here's Sarah Palin.
What does she have to say about Mitt Romney?
Do you really believe that?
Oh, no, I'm sorry.
This is Rick Santorum.
Rick Santorum, can you rip Mitt Romney and pronounce a word in a weird way?
I believe this country wants to elect a Wall Street financier as the president of the United States.
Do you think that's the kind of experience we need?
Someone who's going to take and look after, as he did, his friends on Wall Street and bail them out at the expense of Main Street America.
Who is he?
Jed Clampett?
A fi dance here.
Yeah, that's what I was talking about.
So here's another one.
The fact is, he still is not prepared to release any documents from Bain to prove anything.
So I think we have no idea what his net job creation was.
So there you go.
Here's some more.
Do you really believe that?
Governor Romney has claimed to have created 100,000 jobs at Bain, and people are wanting to know: is there proof of that claim?
So why do they care about Corey Booker?
They have plenty of great surrogates for Obama out there saying what needs to be said.
Well, now that there's a single nominee, they're going to shut up.
Well, they already have.
Sarah Palin said the exact opposite of that the other night on Fox.
Yes, she did.
I don't have that clip because I don't have a producer.
Okay.
Here's Newt Gingrich again.
Look, I'm for capitalism.
I'm for people who go in to save a company.
I'm for people who take real risk.
But if somebody comes in, takes all the money out of your company and then leaves you bankrupt while they go off with millions.
That's not traditional capitalism.
That's not traditional capitalism.
Okay.
And I believe that Newt Gingrich believes in real risk, like going to a restaurant in the daytime with your mistress.
But the truth is, that is how capitalism has been all along.
Capitalism has always, since the creation of corporations, that's how capitalism has been.
If you look at the turn of the century, there was culture has been abundant.
But that's, I mean, I think that's a sliver of capitalism.
But I think capitalism isn't a portion of it.
Saying that that's not what you get with a capitalistic free market society is being naive.
Yeah, but I wish it wasn't that way.
I wish the government would step in and have more controls.
But this is the history of venture capitalism.
This is nothing new.
Here's one more Rick Perry.
I got to get Robert Reich in here.
Here's one more Rick Perry.
When people can point to where you've made a quick profit and kick people out of their jobs.
That is an issue that's got to be addressed.
Okay, so people are afraid.
Oh, no, it's ruined because of Corey Booker.
I'm like, Barack Obama has.
And I hope that Obama or his PACs are going to put a lot of ads out in the fall with those exact sound bites.
You know, they're planning to.
There's a great book out about the era of the Titans of Rockefeller, Carnegie, Jay Gould, and I think one other person.
And it's a fascinating look at really the birth of a lot of this, these ways of milking and manipulating a lot of good ideas in books.
Again, generally, I'm not a fan of books, Jimmy.
Thank you.
But every once in a while, they're nice.
Okay, they make for they turn them into TV shows sometimes.
So they are valuable in that sense.
I wait for the movie.
Okay, listen, we're up against a break.
Are we rubbing up against the break?
We are rubbing it hard up against the break.
And when we come back, we're going to hear from Mitt Romney calls in.
Corey Booker calls in, and Ron Paul also has something to say that's coming up on the second half.
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Okay, we're back at the Jimmy Door show.
I'm joined in studio from Mystery Science Theater 3000.
It's Frank Conniff from the Mental Illness Happy Hour Podcast.
It's Paul Gilmartin and former writer for the Daily Show, hilarious comedian Steve Rosenfield is with us.
What's coming up on the second half of today's show?
We're going to hear, we're going to call in from Mitt Romney calls in to explain his predecessor comments that he made earlier, not wanting to refer to George Bush by his name.
We're going to listen to Corey Booker, who explains his gaff he made on Press the Meet last week.
And also Ron Paul joins us to talk a little bit about racism.
Right now, let's go ahead and listen to the Mitt Romney.
I sat down, but let me first remind you of the clip we're referring to.
Here's Mitt Romney doing some verbal gymnastics to try to not mention George Bush's name when he's giving his speech.
He refers to him as the predecessor.
Here it is.
He was very critical of his predecessor for the debts the predecessor put in place.
He was very critical of his predecessor because the predecessor put together a pack of pickled peppers.
Okay, so that's Mitt Romney.
So I sat down.
We had a phone call with him.
We talked about those verbal gaffes and we talked about Corey Booker coming out in support of him.
So let's go to that conversation with Mitt Romney right now.
I'm talking with Governor Mitt Romney.
Hi, Mitt.
Thanks for taking time out and talking with us today.
My pleasure, Jimmy.
How are you?
I'm doing great.
Listen, we noticed that you're avoiding.
I know President Bush is unpopular.
He's left office with the lowest popularity ratings of any president in modern times.
He continues to remain unpopular.
Is that influencing why you won't say his name?
We notice you're not saying his name.
Well, who are you talking about?
I'm talking about the president.
I'm trying to tell you about President Obama.
That's the incumbent president right now.
That's the person we have in office.
And that's the person who needs to be removed from office so I can get back in business.
Yeah, but I really want to ask you about your avoidance of saying President Bush's name.
Well, he likes Obama, he loves to criticize his predecessor because his predecessor supposedly ran up all this debt.
And Obama likes to blame his predecessor.
Who's that?
Who ran up the debt prior to Obama?
His antecedent.
Who's his antecedent?
Well, the aforementioned antecedents.
Who is that?
Who are you talking about?
Well, the successor of Bill Clinton.
Who is that, though?
Can you just say his name?
Who is the successor of Bill Clinton?
The son of former president George Herbert Walker.
Okay, I notice you won't say the word Bush.
Why won't you say the word Bush?
Look, Jimmy, I'll be honest with you.
Bush is a term for pubic hair and a brand of beer.
Just too much for a Mormon to deal with.
Okay, I got it.
Oh, the muffins are ready.
So, Matt...
Oh, there's some more muffins in this house, buddy.
You better step on it.
Okay, I'm hurrying up.
Listen, I wanted to talk to you about Corey Booker.
And I don't know if you saw what he said on Meet the Press last Sunday, but everybody's talking about it.
He actually came out and said that Barack Obama's attack on you for your work with Bain Capital makes him nauseous.
Well, you know what?
I like that, Corey Booker.
Yes, he's one of the good ones.
What does that mean?
Finally, I have my own black.
Corey Booker.
He and I, we could go to the park and share banana splits.
Yes.
We could go to a carnival and I feel a montage coming on.
I'll win the dart throwing contest, but I'll graciously give him the big stuffed bear.
So what do you mean when you say he's one of the good ones?
Well, he's part of the 10% that you don't hear about.
You know, he's not going to Cat Williams shows or walking around neighborhoods with Skittles in his pocket.
By the way, do you realize how much violence you have to have inside of you to be high on pot and still beat someone's head in the concrete?
You've got to have some problems, Buster.
Okay, okay, Buzzler.
But listen, I know you're saying that Corey's your pal, your big pal, Corey Booker's your new pal now, but you know, he immediately renounced.
He's my boy.
Oh, watch it.
Watch it, Papyru Can.
Listen, you know that Corey Booker immediately renounced.
He plays your voice.
He's my boy.
It's just as bad.
My boy is a.
I've studied this.
My boy is a compliment.
Your boy is an insulting thing that you should never say.
Okay, okay.
So, and it's good news that Corey Booker could be a priest now in your church.
Isn't that nice?
Yes, we had a revelation in 1978.
That realized that black people are indeed human beings.
Yeah, only 13 years after the civil rights legislation passed.
So, God, it's funny that the leaders of the Mormon Church are about 13 years Behind LBJ.
Well, we're ahead in many other ways.
Okay, I get you.
But listen, I just want Corey.
Which ways are you ahead?
Well, first of all, we've incorporated spaceship aesthetics into our church architecture way before anyone else had.
We're on the forefront of secretly marrying several wives.
We're in the vanguard of posthumous baptisms of Holocaust victims.
That's something that no one had thought of until we came along.
We stake the claim in that, and we're very proud of that.
It's pretty offensive to a lot of people, but I want to get back to Governor.
Let's get back to the issue.
Corey Booker immediately renounced his support for you that he gave on Meet the Press.
What do you say to that?
Well, I think it's great, Jimmy.
That means he flip-flopped.
What could possibly be a stronger endorsement but that?
Okay.
All right.
You know what?
I never looked at it like that.
Okay, well.
Well, you got to see it from the other side and then go see it from the other side.
And then go see it from the other side again.
There's not that many sides.
It's like cooking a big griddle of flapjacks.
What?
That's the worst analogy.
Listen, thank you very much.
I'm not good at talking.
You and Corey Booker have any plans in the future?
We're going to go marlin fishing off the coast of Mobile Bay together.
Oh, wow.
Wow.
Okay.
That sounds like something rich guys do.
Yeah, you're pretty right about that.
All right, Governor, I appreciate your time.
Thank you.
All right, Buster.
You take care.
Have a great summer.
Go fuck yourself.
Okay, that was a bit rod me letting us know.
Thanks, Mitt.
The Jimmy Dora show is available as a podcast for free on iTunes.
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Okay, so I was watching Fox News the other day and they had Geraldo on, and he had, first of all, it's funny that Geraldo can't seem to get through his Hispanic skull that wearing a hoodie is not a criminal offense, right?
So here he is interviewing the lawyers for both Zimmerman and Trayvon Martin.
Ben Crump, the reason I mentioned on the O'Reilly show the hoodie was the surveillance video from the 7-Eleven.
And it's such a contrast, what Trayvon really looked like that night as opposed to the little boy pictures that were released initially.
That's the only reason if he had taken that damn hood off his head, if he and Zimmerman had only spoken, what are you doing here, kid?
I'm here.
My father's fiancé's here.
I'm supposed to be here.
Don't you think that that could have avoided this awful tragedy?
Yes, he solicited.
No.
No.
Trayvon is the reason.
Trayvon with his hoodie.
It was his fault for wearing a hoodie.
If he would have just taken that damn hoodie off, George Zimmerman, the crazy, crazy maniac who's running around with a gun, who has a violent history, wouldn't have shot him.
He wouldn't have.
It's all Trayvon Martin's fault.
If he would have taken off that damn hoodie, it would have been obvious that he was one of the good ones.
If stereotypes would just distance themselves from stereotypes, vigilantes wouldn't get in trouble.
Right, exactly.
You know what?
No one's saying, Paul, that Trayvon Martin deserved to die because he was wearing a hoodie.
We're just saying it's an excellent reason to let George Zimmerman walk.
I think that's what I'm saying.
That was the, you know, the extenuating circumstances of the killing is that he was wearing, he had that hood on.
Yes.
So therefore, it was okay to shoot him.
I mean, I'm with Geraldo on this.
I mean, if Trayvon Martin didn't want to get mistaken for a criminal, what was he doing being black in Florida?
That's the real question, right?
So it was very suspicious, too, the way he purchased the Skittles and the iced tea.
Yes.
Because obviously he was trying to trick people into not knowing his true motivations, which was to rob the store at gunpoint that he didn't have.
Right.
See, Frank, good point.
The surveillance video, if you look at it, it shows Trayvon in the hoodie, and it shows how similar he looks to millions of other black teenagers buying candy and drinks.
Yeah, it really does.
Very suspicious.
And go ahead.
It's just incredible that somebody is saying, is calling a hoodie more dangerous than somebody carrying a gun.
That that is being overlooked, the fact that George Zimmerman, who has a history of erratic behavior, is carrying a gun.
Like, once he brandished that gun, you don't think that scared the f ⁇ out of Trayvon Martin?
Right?
I know.
He's got a gun.
I got to start defending myself.
This guy's coming at me.
Right.
Exactly.
Exactly.
And do you think Zimmerman walked up to the guy without his gun?
He thinks this guy's a criminal, right?
He's black.
He's got a hoodie on.
This guy's a criminal.
You don't think he had his gun out?
I think he had his gun out.
I would have my gun out if I was walking up to a guy who I thought was a criminal.
And, you know, I think we have to stop pretending that we know what happened that night and wait until Zimmerman's attorney can make the case that an unarmed black teenager has the strength of 10 white men.
That's coming.
That's coming.
So Trayvon Martin's lawyer says this back.
Geraldo, two points.
First of all, Mark Zuckerberg and the CEO of Facebook, one of the richest men in the world, wear a hoodie every day.
And so you mean to tell me if Martin Zuckerberg was walking through the gated community, he could be profiled and killed by Jerry Zimmerman.
You know, him and Trayvon both wear the same uniform, a hoodie and jeans.
What's the difference between the two?
What is the difference?
Difference is in the eye of George Zimmerman, isn't it, Ben Crump?
Isn't that the only subjective viewpoint?
When you're talking about self-defense and why the encounter was initiated, isn't that what counts?
So he poses a question to Geraldo.
What's the difference between Mark Zuckerberg, a billionaire wearing a hoodie all the time, and Trayvon Martin wearing a hoodie?
And Geraldo says, well, racists are going to think that the black kid is bad.
Right.
So which is the same thing as the kid being bad.
Because if racists think he's bad, he is.
He is.
His racism isn't extenuating circumstances.
Yes.
That's what he's saying.
He's saying that.
So black people, to prevent racist behavior, what they have to do is stop leaving their homes.
Because if you're a black guy walking around, a racist is going to take umbrage with that and possibly shoot you.
He's trying to steal his sidewalk.
He's trying to steal that sidewalk.
Yes.
You know, the only thing that I just wish that Geraldo Rivera had more of a reputation that he could be Ruining right now.
I know.
You would think he would shut up about the hoodie because he got into that thing and then he kind of walked it back.
He apologized, and now he's back because he saw the surveillance tape.
Oh, look, I was right, people.
So, what Geraldo Rivera is doing is he is revealing that when I see a black kid in a hoodie, I get afraid.
That's what he's saying.
And so then he has to justify that because I'm a good person, and so I couldn't possibly be racist.
I'm Geraldo Rivera.
Well, that's what's happening, Geraldo.
You have a double standard for black people and white people, and you don't even realize that.
And if Mark Zuckerberg, when he walks down the street in his hoodie, people come up to him and attack him with shitty IPOs.
Okay, he should be attacked.
Yes.
So, you know, whenever we get a chance to have a conversation with Ron Paul, we certainly take advantage of it.
And I just had an opportunity to talk to him just the other day.
And we're going to pick it up where I was lamenting the fact that I get a lot of my good comedy ideas in the shower, and I don't have any place to write them down.
And Ron Paul had a great solution.
He said to write them down with my finger on the shower door.
So let's pick it up from there.
Like a brilliant writer or composer or whatever.
Yeah, but then once the steam goes away, I don't know what I wrote.
Well, you do it with a little soap on your finger, and then at least residue you can see if you like look at it from an angle.
Oh, okay.
That's how they wrote the Constitution.
In steam?
Yes.
Um...
Thank you.
What was the idea?
I'm trying.
I'm traveling.
Maybe this is the bit that I'm trying to remember what you're supposed to say.
It's something to do with racism.
Something to do with.
Oh, not that whole chestnut again.
Oh, yeah.
Somebody wrote me.
Oh, people get upset that we call Ron Paul a racist.
And they say that we have nothing to base it on except his own newsletter with his name on it that he claims he never read because he was too busy working.
You know how people who work don't have time to read newsletters with their own names on them.
I guess he's flying around not reading on the plane.
I guess that's what he's doing.
All right.
So that is so weird.
That is weird.
But I can't think of what that bit would be.
I forgot what the thing was.
I mean, do you want to?
Let me look at the bits I'm doing and maybe it'll jar me.
Maybe it'll jar.
I mean, jar, you know, you know what I'm saying.
Okay, I'm doing that.
That.
Let the voice inspire you.
Well, I'm going to, I'm playing a video of a guy in Mississippi.
They just pretty much effectively outlawed abortion because they said they make all these requirements for a doctor to perform an abortion.
And so Bron Paul is against abortion.
Well, you know, in the case of an honest rape.
He said, so what they've so made it hard for poor women to get abortions in Mississippi.
What they've done.
So, you know, people have to leave the state to go get an abortion, and it's only going to affect poor women, the people who need reproductive health rights more than anybody, access that more than anybody.
Because they're punishing them.
The guy said, we have to start being moral and we have to start somewhere.
So you start with the most vulnerable people in our society.
We make them.
We make them.
So don't you think that's horrible that they've effectively outlawed abortion in Mississippi and now poor women will be the ones bearing the brunt of this rule?
Well, yeah, because the problem is that's just going to mean more black people.
No, Ron, that sounds like something that was written in your newsletter.
Well, it was.
We did.
Now we did an article, I think, in his second quarter of 1992 in there about how abortion, the only good side of it, is it keeps the minority population down.
You know, which leads a fewer carjacking.
Okay.
But, you know, that really sounds horrible.
You know, well, yeah.
You wouldn't think.
Well, I mean, it's it's it's.
I'm certainly well aware of that.
What, what, what?
But don't you think this is just another way of victimizing the poor or making the poor bear the brunt of what I don't understand why we have to.
Well, they can certainly choose not to have an abortion.
Yeah, but they choose to need an abortion.
You know what I mean?
I don't understand how that works.
Well, let's say.
I mean, don't get, I mean, being pregnant is a choice.
I mean, you can choose.
What about if someone's raped?
Well, that's a rare thing.
Yeah, but what if it's first of all?
It's not that rare.
Second of all, it happens.
So what do you say we should do then?
Well, I think they should probably make rape illegal then.
I mean, I don't like making laws, but I guess I guess that's outlaw rape.
Well, rape is outlawed.
I mean, that would be the, I mean, it's not exactly a small government solution, which is what I try to espouse.
But you see, think we should.
But yeah, I guess we'll have to do that.
We should start by making rape illegal on a local level first and see how it works.
Yeah, there's certainly no reason for the federal government to be involved in sex crimes.
I mean, law and order SVU would be a pretty boring show if there were a bunch of federal bureaucrats just doing a bunch of paperwork.
Okay, so you're on board with Mississippi's new law that effectively outlaws abortion for people who are poor.
Anytime we can make the burden of living squarely on the shoulders of the lowest socioeconomic stratum of our society, it's a victory for liberty.
Okay.
Okay.
Well, okay, Ron.
Well, I think we got your point of view, and I appreciate it.
Well, what's your solution?
My solution is to not pass that law.
My solution is to make abortion accessible to women of all economic status.
Well, then you'll just, you know.
What?
I just hear you saying you know.
Just a bunch of, you know.
Yeah, I just, I hear you saying, you know.
Well, I mean, I mean, obviously, if you just, you know, completely allow abortion, I mean, well, you know, I mean, yeah.
Yeah, I know.
You just keep, You say abortion, you just keep saying you know.
You know.
Okay, Dr. Paul, I appreciate you taking time with us today.
Dr. Paul?
Oh, I'm sorry.
I was just heavens, I'm not with a cognitive dissonance.
Sometimes it freezes my brain out a little bit.
Anyway, take care, Jimmy.
Thought about your doggy.
Okay, bye.
Okay, our thanks to Dr. Paul for stopping in and saying hi to us right now.
Guess what?
We talked with Corey Booker, Newark Mayor Corey Booker, who made some big gaffes on Meet the Press.
We talked about earlier in the show.
And here he is.
Joining me now is Newark Mayor Corey Booker.
Your Honor, thanks for coming on the show.
Well, I was just pulling a woman from a burning building, but luckily I found time to stop by.
Oh, you rescued a woman from a burning building again?
Actually, I do that on a daily basis.
Mayor, how is it that you end up rescuing people from burning buildings so often?
Hey, this is Newark.
Arson is a way of life here.
I don't want to say the neighborhoods are bad, but people try to destroy them to improve their quality of life.
Folks who live in Newark look at movies like Mad Max with burnt out post-apocalyptic landscapes and think, I wish I lived in a nice place like that.
Well, I'd like to talk to you about what you said on Meet the Press, Mr. Mayor.
Jimmy, what's the big deal?
All I did was present myself as a surrogate for the Obama campaign and then talk about how the Obama campaign makes people a puke.
But won't you admit that it's unusual for an Obama surrogate to criticize Obama?
Jimmy, here's what happened.
The first time I saw the Obama campaign's anti-Bane Capital ad, I happened to be visiting Chris Christie at the New Jersey governor's mansion.
Jimmy, have you ever watched a 500-pound man dip glaze donuts into a vat of pork lard gravy and then wash it all down with a giant mug of bacon grease?
No, I can't say I ever have.
Well, that was a nauseating sight.
I can pull a woman out of a burning building, but I'll never be able to pull that image from my permanently discarded site.
Sounds horrible, Your Honor.
But what does that have to do with Obama's anti-Bain Capital ad campaign?
I told you, I was watching Obama's campaign ad.
Well, Governor Chris Christie raised the bar on gluttony and bring it to a caligula-worthy level of decadence.
The two things are linked together in my brain forever, and they both make me want to hurl chunks.
So you're saying the sight of Chris Christie eating made you lose your cookies?
Yes.
And then he ate those cookies off the floor.
It was disgusting.
Okay, but why then are you praising Bain Capital?
Jimmy, you're forgetting that after Meet the Press, I made a YouTube video where I said I didn't say what I said on Meet the Press.
So therefore, I technically never said any of that stuff in the first place.
But you only made that video due to the uproar over your original comments, right?
Well, the thing is, Jimmy, did I mention that I saved a woman from a burning building?
Yes, you did.
And it was very admirable, Mr. Mayor, but you undermined Obama's whole anti-Bain capital strategy.
Yes, I did.
And I feel awful about it.
By praising private equity firms and Wall Street bankers and billionaire hedge fund managers, I've made it difficult for Obama to be re-elected and serve a second term, where he will continue to enact policies that favor private equity firms, Wall Street bankers, and billionaire hedge fund managers.
Well, Mayor Booker, I'd like to thank you for coming on the show today.
Can I add one more thing?
Sure, you can add one more thing.
Chris Christie is a large man.
He sure is.
Thank you, Mr. Mayor.
Okay, thanks, Jimmy.
Okay, that was the hilarious Mike McRae, and Mike McCrae can be found at MikeMcRae.com.
Mike McRae does most of the hilarious voices here at the Jimmy Door show.
Check them out.
Okay, that is our show.
And if you heard that laughter on the last phone call, there was a female laughter in there.
That was Liz Winstead, who just wrote the new book, Liz Free or Die.
She's the creator of The Daily Show.
She used to host a show on Air America.
She's responsible for discovering Rachel Maddow.
She's a hilarious comedian herself, and she's going to be our guest next week on the show.
So we'll have some of that on the show.
And you can also hear her on my other show, Comedy and Everything Else, for an extended interview with Liz Winstead.
And that's all coming up next week.
Okay, so I want to thank everybody who helped write the show today.
Frank Conniff, Mike McRae, Steve Rosenfield, Robert Yasimura, Steph Samurano helped write today's show.
The next left, right, and ridiculous is June 30th, June 30th.
So it's a little over four weeks away.
So mark your calendars.
June 30th, left, right, and ridiculous at the Improv Lab, 8 p.m.
That's a Saturday night.
Okay, that's all.
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