All Episodes
Previous Next
May 18, 2012 - Jimmy Dore Show
01:06:03
20120518_The_JImmy_Dore_Show_5-18-12_a
| Copy link to current segment

Time Text
Before we get started, I want to let you know that we're doing left, right, and ridiculous this Sunday at the Improv Lab next to the improv on Melrose, one block west of Crescent Heights.
It's the funniest show in Los Angeles, a unique and raucous blend of stand-up sketch and some video clips of some of the dumbest things you've ever heard people say.
Tickets are only $10, and you can get a link for tickets at my website, JimmyDoorComedy.com.
That's this Sunday, 8 p.m. at the Improv Lab.
And the great thing about the lab is there's no drink minimums, none of that stuff.
So when you go to see the show, it's just about the show.
Speaking of which, here comes this week's show.
We'll be right back.
It's the Jimmy Dore Show.
The show for blackbeast.
The kind of people that are.
Phil Bench, maybe on Tearing Down Our Nation.
It's the show that makes Anderson Cooper save.
It's hard to talk to you, Key Galgon.
And now, here's a guy who sounds a lot like me.
It's Jimmy Dore.
Hi, everybody.
Welcome to this week's episode.
I am joined in studio from Team Yasamura, hilarious comedian Robert Yasamura.
Hey, Robert.
How are you?
Robert, you look sprite today.
You look like you're awake.
I'm wearing a, yeah, I'm awake and I'm wearing a light-colored shirt.
I like it.
Stripe it.
It's nice.
Next to him from cinematictitanic.com and Mystery Science Theater 3000.
It's TV's Frank.
Frank Connoff.
Hi, Frank.
Hello, Dare.
It's good to see you.
Good to see you.
And I like that you're wearing the hat.
You got a hand?
Well, my hair is a mess today.
Yeah, you couldn't.
I have to wear the hat.
My hair is just not functional.
You couldn't do a thing with it.
Couldn't do it for the rest of the day.
Okay, no problem.
I like hats.
Next to him, the host of the Mental Illness Happy Hour Podcast, chosen one of the top 10 podcasts of 2011 by The Onion, right?
Onion AV Club.
The Onion AV Club.
It's Paul Gilmartin.
Hi, Paul.
How are you?
James.
Good to see you.
What's coming up today?
Well, first, let's tell some joke because I don't know.
You know, Mitt Romney, he's been taking credit for a lot of stuff.
You know, he can't remember teasing a gay kid, but he can't remember saving the auto industry.
He can't remember that.
He saved the auto industry right around the same time he killed Bin Laden and directed the Avengers movie.
Hey, Bristol Palin, she's weighing in on the gay marriage controversy.
Bristol Palin says that gay offspring will never know the pure Christian joy of getting knocked up when you're an Udwen team.
Mitt Romney also believes in education because they're having to cut education all over the country.
But Mitt Romney says he believes in education, saying, quote, I wouldn't be the total dick I am now if I hadn't worked hard at it in prep school.
I love that you put a quote in there.
I did it.
Frank put it in there.
And hey, Ron Paul left the race.
Did you guys hear Ron Paul?
Oh, was he in it?
He was.
He was not in it to win it.
There were two news items: that he was in the race and then he's left.
And then he's left the race.
Well, Ron Paul, he's leaving the presidential race, but he will continue to be an important voice in the world of racist crackpots.
And okay, so what's coming up on today's show?
We've got an extended, oh my God, I have three things in there.
Actually, John McCain makes the Oh My God segment this week.
And Bill O'Reilly lets us know why people are poor.
It's exactly what you think he would say.
And Jamie Dimon lost three, two, some say three, some say two.
Between two and three billion.
Some people say it could be more.
I heard someone say that.
Some say more.
So I wouldn't put it past Jamie Dimon for losing $20 billion, but he had to go on Press to Meet with David Gregory to explain it all to let us know that everything's okay and we don't need any regulations.
So we're going to talk about that.
Plus, we have phone calls.
Ron Paul calls in today to let us know about dropping out of the race.
Plus, Jamie Dimon calls in, huh?
Sure.
And plus, Bill O'Reilly calls in to defend himself.
And we have a real phone call from the host of Best of the Left, Jay, telling us about a great new opportunity for people who like lefty media.
That's coming up today on the Jimmy Dore show.
Time for another installment of Oh My God.
Okay, we're going to kick it off really quick with the Oh My God segment.
Here's a young lady giving a speak at the given a speech at the FRCAction conference.org.
It doesn't matter who she is or where she's from.
She's a nice conservative Christian, and she's got something to say.
And let's listen.
If I could insist, this might sound a little strange, but if I could insist, as long as they are legal in our nation, abortions would be done in the public square until we were so sick and tired of seeing them that we would do away with the injustice altogether.
Maybe then we would value the unborn child as we value the one-year-old child just learning to walk.
And maybe then we might hear angels singing when we ponder the glory of conception, that first beginning of human life.
I'm young.
I only turned 21 a couple months ago, and I've only been working a short time.
But I will continue to dedicate my life to ending the dark injustice of abortion.
Okay.
Okay, strange.
Why would you think it's strange to perform private medical procedures in the street?
Why would you consider the public square?
There's more light out there anyway.
That's the way I look at it.
But wait, some creepos, now that I think about it, she's got a point because some creepos might actually get off on the humiliation that women is enduring.
What a nice thought, though, she had, isn't it?
Right.
And how about, how about we give how about we have her give her speech?
I will guarantee she wrote that speech in a unicorn notebook.
In the unicorn notebook.
I don't get that joke.
Because it's just.
She's got this like girly, girly, girly.
Oh, okay, I got you.
Oh, I got you.
Yeah, she's 21.
She's got a naive view of the world.
Right.
She's obviously never, she's never had a pregnant, she's never been pregnant.
That's obvious, right?
She's never been pregnant.
She's never had to worry about that.
You know, so again, Barack Obama came out.
It's a big deal.
Barack Obama is very pleased with himself.
He's pro-gay marriage.
And so here he is.
Pat Robertson actually had to have a rebuttal to that.
And here's what Pat Robertson is.
The bottom line is a male is equipped in a particular fashion and a female is equipped in a particular fashion.
And if you're an electrician, you know that.
You know that.
You don't have to be a biologist to know this.
Come on.
That's just Pat Robertson talking some common sense.
The union of the two brings forth children.
The union of two men doesn't bring forth anything.
It doesn't bring.
Okay, but maybe it just brings about a loving relationship that maybe you can a family.
I would disagree.
Occasionally it brings forth a beautiful mid-century home.
Very nice.
So let's see what Paul.
Let's see what Pat Robertson says it brings about.
The union of two men doesn't bring forth anything except disease, apparently, and suffering.
And the same thing of the union of two women.
That's all it brings about.
So Paul, you're wrong about the house, the mid-century.
It's about there being pleasure and love.
You're wrong about that, Jimmy.
Obviously.
There can't be blove.
There can't be a foundation to build a family.
No, I was wrong.
But what I would say to Pat Robinson on a purely theological level is why, if what you're saying is true that they can't have children, why did God invent the ability to ejaculate into a turkey baster?
That is a good point, Frank.
That is a good point.
Anything else?
Also, there's never been a heterosexual marriage in the world that's brought forth disease and suffering.
Well, that's my whole point.
I'm going to guess quite a few.
Yeah.
My parents, for example, brought about alcoholism and suffering.
Sure.
And, you know, I'm pretty sure Charlie Manson was conceived in a heterosexual marriage.
I'm just going to say that.
I'm just going to go ahead and say that.
Him, Pol Pot, I think there were two man and a woman.
Sure.
Hitler, I think, had a man and a woman as parents.
Yes, but he only had one testicle.
That's right.
Right.
You know, I was surprised he didn't go on to become a great cyclist.
The point is, John McCain was asked, he was on the television on CNN, and they asked him, because Mitt Romney has to pick his vice president now, so they asked him, can you give any advice?
What should Mitt Romney be doing, and how should he be vetting, and what should he be considering when picking a vice president?
And John McCain knows better than anybody.
Yeah.
Make it look unvetted and desperate.
Here's what he said.
Here's what he said.
The most important thing is.
Primary, the absolute most important aspect is, if something happened to him, would that person be well qualified to take that place?
I happen to believe that was the primary factor on my decision in 2008.
I know it will be missed.
How was that not the Oh My God segment?
That is.
That was.
That was part of the triple play Oh My God segment.
Oh, that's right.
There was more than one Oh My God.
That's how we're closing out this segment.
Wow.
Oh My God.
Yeah, that is a great Oh My God.
That is a great Oh My God.
Wow.
That was, you know, when I'm confronted with a screw-up, I usually just cough and try to change the subject.
Don't highlight it.
He really has moved into that area of elderly men who say nonsensical things.
It's unbelievable.
I mean, give McCain credit on this one.
He's still a maverick when it comes to assessing reality.
It must be the old age catching up to him.
He forgot he chose Sarah Palin second in line to be the leader of the free world, just like he forgot how many houses he owned.
And I say it's a pity he wasn't elected because McCain had all the qualities that make a great president.
One, the ability to recognize his mistakes.
Two, weighing all the options before making a decision.
And three, the gift for finding future reality TV stars.
Now, who is this on Fox, this interview?
This was in all this with Jake Tapper on ABC.
Oh, and Jake Tapper didn't challenge him on that?
Oh, do you want to hear what Jake Tapper said right back to him?
Yeah.
Here's how Jake Tapper fired back at him.
Ready?
All right, Senator John McCain, thanks so much for joining us.
We really appreciate it.
Bam!
Wow.
Bam!
Pulled the rug out from underneath him.
Don't you even try it, buddy.
Talk about speaking truth to power.
Don't bring that weak stuff in here, McCain.
That Jake Tapper's going to slap it right back down.
I love the one-fourth estate.
Oh, nice.
My God.
That was exactly what he said.
Gentlemen of the press, ladies and gentlemen.
Yeah.
Wow.
Yeah.
And you know what?
The point I want to make here is McCain didn't have to say that stuff.
Right.
He didn't have to say, well, you know, the thing, you know how I did it.
Just say what he should have done and don't say that's how you did it because we know that's not how you did it.
Right.
And I think even, you know, at this point in history, we know that history is not going to say retroactively, oh, Sarah Palin was actually smarter than people said she was.
And, you know, we know now that she was brilliant.
That's never going to happen.
That's never, no, it's not going to go.
You know what?
She was right about all that stuff, though.
That's never going to happen.
You can see Russia from her house.
She was right about that.
They've done studies now.
So, okay, that was John McCain in the Oh, My God.
You know what?
I lied.
There's actually one more clip to play in this week's Oh, My God segment.
And I was watching.
Oh, My God.
Mm-hmm.
I was watching Bill O'Reilly, and he was breaking down what's wrong with the poor or how white people are poor.
And what I love about Bill O'Reilly is that he's not crazy like Glenn Beck.
He's not a provocateur like Rush Limbaugh.
So, you know, when Bill O'Reilly says something, he really is selfish, ignorant, and narcissistic prick.
He really is, right?
And so here he is talking about why poor people are poor.
There's always a reason.
And I'm just going to guess maybe it's, I always thought it was poor people were poor because they were drug addicts, dropouts, or, you know, deranged.
Oh, you're forgetting that they don't try hard enough.
Oh, okay.
We can add that in.
Let's see what Bill O'Reilly says.
Let's see if he agrees with me.
With every poor person in America, I'd like to bring them in here.
I can analyze the situation and tell you why they're poor.
They drop out of school.
They get addicted to alcohol or drugs.
They have a mental problem, an emotional problem that's untreated.
There's always a reason in this country, Mr. Salt.
Yeah, there you go.
So he's got to go to the three, it's the druggies, right?
Or their dropouts.
Or they have a mental problem.
They're deranged, right?
So.
And it has nothing to do with the minimum wage not being a living wage.
It has nothing to do with that.
It has nothing to do with that at all, Paul.
I mean, and the people who work at Walmart, they all make enough money.
But if they had mental problems, wouldn't they get jobs on Fox?
So let's let that breathe for a second, what Bill O'Reilly just said.
In fact, let's just listen to it again, because it's so good.
It's a great way to end this Oh My God segment.
With every poor person in America, I'd like to bring them in here.
I can analyze the situation and tell you why they're poor.
They drop out of school.
They get addicted to alcohol or drugs.
They have a mental problem, an emotional problem that's untreated.
There's always a reason in this country, Mr. Salt.
Yeah.
Alcoholism, addiction, mental illness.
It's not like those are problems I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.
It's not like a person with an ounce of empathy or an education outside of the Bible and a tumbler of scotch would appreciate the difference between affliction and irresponsibility.
And what about all the kids now coming out of college who have degrees and are $150,000 in debt, and there's no jobs for them?
How do you explain that?
Is that that they have mental problems or they're poor and they're on drugs?
They're probably druggies.
Yeah, they probably have mental problems.
There's a reason for it.
They're all on the Chiba.
Yeah, if you have a college degree and you can't get a job that gets you out of poverty, then you're probably a drug addict.
You heard him say it.
Yeah.
If you bring in any poor person into the Fox studio, and he will break it down and let you know what is wrong with you and why you're poor.
This is assuming they're not shot on sight by the security guard.
Why would God be so?
Because here's the problem, right?
Because he has to say that.
Because if he doesn't say that, then we have a responsibility to the poor.
Exactly.
Because then we have a responsibility to set up an economy, an economic system that makes sure that if you work hard, you can get out of poverty.
Well, that's not the case today.
People are working their asses off all over the place really hard, and they can't bring themselves out of poverty.
Or sometimes they are out of poverty, and then they get an illness.
Shends them right back into poverty.
They lose their house.
So, yeah, how are you supposed to not be poor if you get a catastrophic illness and you're working hard, but you don't have health insurance?
I don't know.
I don't know.
But, you know, it's very rare that you hear, you know, the Republicans actually say that.
Like, they actually give their ideology out there.
I mean, it's— They love their ideologies until you give them a hypothetical case.
case.
Yes, yes.
And then things get very, very quiet.
Not even hypothetical concrete.
Hey, Martha over here, like, just we'll actually bring a poor person into his studio and go, she, uh, her medications are too expensive and she lost everything.
And he'll be like, well, but the tides go in.
The tides go out.
Yes.
And then Rick Santorin would say, well, does she have an iPad?
Then she doesn't deserve it.
Right.
If, you know.
She has a wheelchair, doesn't she?
What if the poor didn't cause their own misery?
That's the question you have to ask, which Bill O'Reilly doesn't want to address, because that would mean, as a simple matter of human decency, we would have to provide aid and services to those people.
What if bad things just happen to good people?
Well, that would mean that God is cruel.
That's what that would mean if bad things happen to good people.
Or maybe God doesn't exist at all.
And what if everyone doesn't get what they deserve?
Well, that would mean that maybe Bill O'Reilly is just lucky and not favored by God for his goodness.
In fact, that might even mean that Bill has all his success, not because, but in spite of being a hateful, unconscionable a-hole.
But now that Bill O'Reilly has told me how the world really works, it all just seems so simple.
And I feel totally justified in every shitty thing I've ever done.
He's close to the truth in a way because he says that the poor are responsible for their own unhappiness.
But I really think that the rich are responsible for their own unhappiness.
Why is that?
Because all the rich people in this world who are unhappy, they can't blame it on the fact that they don't have money.
It's because they create all these neurotic problems for them, like Bill O'Reilly, who doesn't strike me as a happy person, strikes me as an ego out of control, probably doesn't have a lot of friends.
Right.
So, you know, poor people, they're just, they don't even have the luxury of that kind of unhappiness.
They only have, they can only concentrate on how am I going to keep a roof over my head and how am I going to.
But don't you think after you're rich and then you're unhappy, that's an even worse kind of unhappiness.
Well, I don't know.
I mean, you know, I think it's better to be rich and unhappy than poor and unhappy for sure.
You know what?
I would have to, I'm going to retract what I've said.
The thing is, it's not even unhappiness.
Living in that kind of poverty is to live in the world.
Yeah, you don't even have the poverty of the kind of unhappiness that these people have real fear and anxiety.
Yeah, I don't know if you guys know this.
Enui is a French luxury.
Only certain people can afford ennui.
I don't think that there are people in poverty right now who are all bent out of shape because Whitney Cummings show got renewed.
Your point is, is that you're doing pretty well.
That's the point you're making.
The Jimmy Door show is available as a podcast for free on iTunes.
Or for other ways to subscribe, go to jimmydoorcomedy.com.
And while you're there, you can listen to past episodes and you can comment on them too.
Remember, Jimmy spells his last name, D-O-R-E, JimmyDoorComedy.com.
Okay, so let me set the stage for Jamie Dimon.
Your car had defective brakes and crashed into a tree about five years ago.
Your insurance company buys you a brand new car, which is the exact same car as the one that crashed, and they still haven't fixed the brakes.
Now the car is the economy.
The insurance company is the United States government, and the faulty brakes are credit default swaps.
And you're still getting totally screwed.
So here's Jamie Dimon, the chairman and CEO of JP Morgan Chase.
You know, one of the handful of banks that can single-handedly sink the nation's economy.
Like the ones that did, sure.
Yeah.
And for those who don't remember, the two things that took down the economy were toxic mortgage-backed securities and something called derivatives or credit default swaps.
Well, last week, JP Morgan disclosed that they have lost over $2 billion in derivatives market.
I say three.
I've heard stories, 20 billion.
Okay.
So Jamie Dimon has spent the last week in an almost non-stop message control.
And when you want to control the message, as always, the best place to go is press the meat, where David Gregory will let you make long-winded, self-serving statements and then pretend to challenge you for a few seconds.
Let's start off a little Jamie Dimon talking about what we should do.
But we need solutions.
You know, finger pointing, scapegoating, yelling and screaming.
I've never seen accountability.
Yeah, you can't be finger pointing about what's going wrong on Wall Street.
And you know who else hates finger pointing?
Criminals.
Criminals.
In fact, there's a new organization now called Stop the Finger Pointing.
It's been founded by Bernie Madoff.
The weird thing, it turns out they're having a hard time raising funds.
Isn't that weird?
Can't get any reason.
Their slogan is again with the finger.
Jamie Diamond, there's no finger pointing.
Really, Jamie?
He's in this with the rest of us.
Well, there's, you know, and there was a similar discussion, not with Jamie Dimon, but about this on Morning Joe and the whole thing that, according to them, that Americans should be concerned about is that people are demonizing these people and it's really hurting their feelings.
That should be the major cause of is that we're finger pointing and demonizing them and it really hurts.
It ruins their day, you know, as they drive in from Greenwich, Connecticut to their, into Wall Street.
I'd like to quote Chris Hardwick.
I think they can wipe their tears with their $100 bills.
I think that's okay.
So, but I like how Jamie phrased it.
He said, we, we, we, I'll play it again, how he says we.
Here we go.
Why don't we get some of the profits then?
Right, right.
We need solutions.
You know, we need solutions.
We, we, meaning all of us.
We're right in, we're right in this with Jamie Dimon.
Let's see, that just seems weird to me that we need solutions when you created the problems, right?
Isn't that where he'll create the problems?
He'll get the, he'll get the profits, but then we need solutions when it all goes to, you know, I got a pretty good solution for you.
Stop screwing around with credit default swaps.
How about that?
That's from the you touched the stove once and now you know not to do that school of economics.
It's a little complicated, I know.
Yeah, I agree.
Finger pointing, scapegoating, and screaming won't fix the problem.
You know what, Will?
Appropriately assigning responsibility and administering proportional punishment so that reckless and greedy a-holes know that they can't get away with this kind of BS.
Don't worry, Jamie.
It's not going to happen.
That's not going to happen.
I'm just saying it would be nice.
It would be really nice.
And by the way, on Tuesday, the board of J.P. Morgan voted to keep Jamie Diamond on as both chairman and CEO with his $23 million pay package intact.
Oh, my God.
I assume.
Think about that.
I mean, when I was a kid, there was a show called The Six Million Dollar Man, which was an amount of money that was unfathomable.
Unfathomable amounts of money.
There was a show, I'm older than you.
There was a show when I was a kid called The Millionaire, where John Henry Tipton or whatever his name was sent this guy to give people a check for a million for a million dollars, $1 million.
Wow.
Which was like so much money.
And that would change their life.
Yeah.
Apparently, you need 23 of those every year.
23.
So I think about twice a month, you need a guy to show Up at your house with that check, and then you'll be Jamie Dimon.
Listening to him say this stuff is like listening to a rapist go, we need to make night joggers less sexy.
Oh, by the way, also, Ina Drew, she was the woman in charge of risk management for JP Morgan.
The executive who directly oversaw this debacle with full knowledge of her superiors, by the way.
And Drew will be retiring.
She's going to have to retire.
They didn't fire her.
She has to retire.
She's retiring.
And she's going to take with her a pile of money she's made over the years.
She is currently one of the highest paid officers at JP Morgan.
And to boot, she's likely going to get a $14 million retirement package.
She was getting $2 million.
She was getting $2 million a month.
She was making $1.2 million a month.
That's how much she was making.
Plus, she's going to get an extra $14 million in retirement package, right?
It's like she's a public school teacher or something.
Come on, huh?
Also, but after she's made $1 million a month, how's she supposed to live on just one payment of $14 million for the rest of her life?
I feel really bad.
And she doesn't know where she's going to get her next $14 million check from.
You know, I just want to go over it one more time because when he says that we need solutions and we don't need to blame people, that's like the chief of police saying, look, we don't need to find and stop the serial killer.
We need a way to stop these killings.
That's kind of the same thing, what he's saying.
Except that's not what Jamie Diamond means.
Let me translate.
Mr. Diamond's little piece of sophistry.
What he means is, look, taking responsibility for this isn't going to help.
We need to figure out a way of how we're going to get our money back.
The mob has run better than this, ladies and gentlemen.
If this guy was a Gambino, he would have accepted that that money was gone forever.
And oh, yeah, he would be dead, by the way.
Yeah, he would be dead.
Thank goodness that David Gregory was there to push back.
Ready?
Here's David Gregory pushing back.
What about accountability?
I mean, you know, the story is about.
He starts off good.
That's almost a real question.
What about accountability?
Great to go, David.
So what about accountability?
I mean, you know, the stories about the bank fees, you know, ATM fees being passed on to consumers.
More regulation?
Well, it's going to be passed on to the consumer.
Really?
ATM fees, David?
That's what you come back with?
Unbelievable.
You know, he could be interviewing Don Corleone and he started asking him about olive oil.
That's just what this is his question.
Over and over again from critics and say, you know what?
Wall Street brought down the economy.
Nobody's gone to jail.
Yeah.
And by the way, what's the deal with no double coupons at my grocery store anymore?
Well, that's a good point that he makes there.
Yeah, he does make that point.
Nobody's gone to jail.
He doesn't say he's impress him.
No, he doesn't.
He says ATM fees.
HTM fees.
Are you out of your mind?
And we're upset because they're passing along the cost of regulation.
That's not what people are upset about.
Okay.
ATM fees was just something people could actually do something about.
Go ahead, Robert.
The reason why this is true is how come he isn't looking this guy straight in the eye and going, you're the chairman and CEO of a company that just lost $2 billion on the conservative side.
How are you not taking responsibility for this?
How are you not ensuring that policies will be in place that this will never, ever happen again?
Because the producers of the show and David Gregory want future guests.
That's exactly why.
Yes.
That's exactly why.
Well, they care about ratings because people no longer, there is no longer that tacit agreement that you will have a broadcast license given that you do something that is for the good of the community.
When they started watch the movie Broadcast News.
Yes.
Watch the movie.
Explain it all.
At the very least, change the name of the show from Meet the Press to Softballs with David Gregory.
Put it on ESPN because they're throwing, it's a softball game.
You know what's, I mean, I don't think people, did you realize that David went on Meet the Press that David Gregory is part of the press that they're supposed to be meeting?
And also, did you know that David Gregory is speaking at a Republican Republican-affiliated event?
A right-wing organization hired David, gave Dave Gregory some money to come give a speech at their thing, and he went.
People are really making us think about it.
Oh, wait, no.
No, nobody's making it.
Nobody cares.
Nobody's making a big deal.
Would you have a problem if you spoke at a Democratic?
Yes.
Yes.
Okay.
He's supposed to be independent.
Rachel Maddow doesn't go to progressive meetings and speak at them, even though she is progressive.
But she is more of a columnist.
You know what I'm saying?
She has a column on television.
But I think, though, the Rachel Maddow show is proof that you can have a much better show if you don't go after these big, because none of these big people go on her show.
You don't need them in person to go after them.
There's a ton.
Yeah, there's a ton of really interesting, smart people who can come on and talk about issues.
And you don't have to say, oh, I got the big interview with John McCain and Jamie Dimon.
Because you never get any information out of any of those.
You're giving them a chance to spin it.
That's all you're doing.
Okay, so I'm just saying.
So he did ask.
He did ask him this question.
Brought down the economy.
Nobody's gone to jail.
Okay, so that's good.
He did ask him a question, baby steps, baby steps for David Gregory.
But at this rate, we'll have a good meet the press by the time I have grandkids.
Right?
Okay.
So, you know what?
We're up against a break.
Bill O'Reilly did call me.
And when we come back at the end of half after the break, we're going to continue with Jamie Dimon's interview.
But right now, oh, probably you don't want to hear Bill O'Reilly?
Okay, here comes Bill O'Reilly.
Hey, Bill, it's Jimmy Doer.
How are you?
Hey, good.
Finally, I got you on the phone.
You don't have to leave these long messages.
Yeah, I know.
Bill, listen, I saw what you said about poor people.
It seems a little outrageous for a millionaire to be demonizing the poor.
No, no, no, no.
Okay.
Listen, Dorjan.
You got three kinds of people in this world.
Rich, middle class, and y'all get away from me.
By that, I mean poor people.
Okay, and I can break down how each of those people got there.
It's very simple.
How?
Rich people are rich because they worked hard, stayed in school, and Jesus liked them.
And wanted them to have stuff.
Simple as that.
Got it.
Jesus favors the rich.
Got it.
Well, then you got your middle class people, people middle class, because they're easily satisfied.
Don't want a lot out of life.
They're perfectly happy working 48 to 72 hours a week, 50 minutes a year, and spending two weeks drinking Coors Light on board a carnival cruise.
That's all they need.
They want the responsibility that comes from being rich, nor are they willing to do what it takes to be rich, like demonizing the poor on a cable news program.
I hear what you're saying, Bill.
That all sounds horrible.
But why do you think poor people are poor?
Well, Jimmy, we already know why poor people are poor.
But since we're here, let me lay it on you one more time.
Here's an easy way for you to remember it.
Poor people are poor because of one or more of what I call the three D's.
Druggy, dropout, or deranged.
It's very simple.
There's no other reason.
There's no other reason.
Okay.
Okay, Bill, you know that's, you know, some, What about all the people who work at Walmart?
They're also poor.
Well, just because you work at one of Walmart doesn't mean you wanted 3Ds.
Druggy dropout of the range.
That depends on what job you have at Walmart.
You pick the job.
I'll tell you which one of them they have are the 3Ds.
What about cashier?
Cashier, druggie.
You've seen those folks?
Always on the pot.
What about a guy who works in stocking shelves?
Dropout.
That said, that's the kind of job that some sort of dropout person has.
What about someone who works in home and garden?
I'm going to go with dropout.
Where do the deranged people work at Walbart?
They're the greeters, actually.
Those are where they put the crazies just to let you just for Walmart.
They draw a line of sand when you're walking in there and they say, hey, you get through the deranged people first.
All you got to deal with are druggies.
You're on it.
Okay, Bill.
You know what?
This is someone exactly the way I thought it would go.
Well, that's because you wrote it.
Okay, bye, Bill.
Signara, fuckface.
We're up against a break.
This is the Jimmy Doer show.
Hi, podcast listeners, my favorite listeners.
Thanks, everybody, who went and took advantage of our Pro Flowers promotion for Mother's Day.
It really helped support this show.
So I want to say thanks.
And today, you know, this show is made possible by the generous donations of you guys, the people who listen to this show who enjoy this show.
So thank you very much for that.
And here's an easy way to help support the show.
You go to jimmydoorcomedy.com.
You click on the amazon.com link the next time you want to buy something from amazon.com.
Doesn't cost you anything, doesn't change how you shop.
It really helps the show.
Plus, you can make donations over at JimmyDoorComedy.com.
$20 gets you a CD, really.
It's his hilarious and $55 yearly membership gives you the award-winning DVD Citizen Jimmy.
Okay.
So don't forget, this Sunday, May 20th, 8 p.m., we'll see you at the Improv Lab for the hilarious Left, Right, and Ridiculous with David Feldman, Frank Conniff, Paul Gilmartin doing his jackass Republican character.
And yours truly will be there too.
That's this Sunday, May 20th at the Improv Lab.
Link for tickets are at JimmyDoorComedy.com.
Welcome back to the Jimmy Door show.
I am joined in studio by hilarious comedian from Team Yasamura.
It's Robert Yasamura.
Next to him from Mystery Science Theater 3000 and cinematictitanic.com.
Coming to a city near you.
It's Frank Conniff.
Hi, Frank.
And next to him from the Mental Illness Happy Hour podcast, it's Paul Gilmartin.
Okay, well, we're going to, what's coming up on the second half of today's show?
We get a phone call coming in from Ron Paul is going to call in.
And Jamie Dimon calls in because right now we're talking about Jamie Dimon, who's the head of JP Morgan Chase.
Thank you very much.
Good help, Robert.
And so he was on with David Gregory.
And they were, you know, of course, head of one, he's considered the smartest guy on Wall Street, JP Diamond.
And so you could.
I'd like to meet the most ethical guy on Wall Street.
How about we start introduced to those guys?
The unfortunate thing is, this is it.
This is JP Morgan is considered the most ethical and conservative investment bank on Wall Street.
This guy.
So let's just recap where we were.
So he said this to David Gregory about who should be blamed.
But we need solutions.
You know, finger pointing, scapegoating, yelling and screaming.
I've never seen accountability.
Yeah, so you can't fix something.
And you certainly can't hold anybody accountable for what they did.
And then he said this.
Oh, this is what David Gregory pushed back on him.
What about accountability?
I mean, you know, the stories about the bank fees, you know, ATM fees being passed on to consumers.
More regulation?
Well, it's going to be passed on to the consumer.
Okay, so that was David Gregory totally missing the point.
The problem is not ATM fees, jackface.
Okay, and then so here's Jamie Dimon.
And here's who he thinks should be punished on Wall Street.
Ready?
Who do you think it is?
I think you could say these bad actors should be punished.
Go punish the bad actors.
That's what he's saying.
Go punish the bad actors.
You know, I'm with him on that one because I saw some dinner theater last night and I definitely felt some punishment was in order after that production of The Pajama Game.
Okay, he's got...
I think when you say that Wall Street, well, I think that's not true.
Not everyone in Wall Street was bad.
Not all media is bad.
I like you.
Okay.
That should be your first sign, David Gregory.
Yeah, right there.
There you go.
You know, you shouldn't like him.
You shouldn't like that.
Guy should be holding your feet to the fire so hard that you want to kill him.
Okay.
And let me point out something else here.
Less than a minute ago, Jamie Dimon was saying that he doesn't want to blame anyone.
We shouldn't be pointing fingers.
He just wants to find a solution.
But now he's saying he wants to punish the people responsible, but that there is no underlying problem to solve in the first place.
You know, that's like a snake eating its own tail while shaped into a Mobius strip.
And I just told a joke I don't even understand to express how full of it that this guy really is.
Okay, he's got more to say.
You know, I trust you, actually.
You know, not all politicians are bad.
There's some fabulously smart, bright people, you know, in Washington.
Why isn't David Gregory saying, stop changing the subject?
He's completely saying stuff that has no, there's no point to it.
Because he's stroking David Gregory's ego and David Gregory.
David Gregory is just accepting it.
It's unbelievable.
I like his attitude to just blame everybody.
If you think someone does something wrong, go get those people to do something wrong and blame them.
Yeah, okay.
Well, we will.
That's why you're on the show.
Yes, because you're the CEO of one of the largest banks in the world, right?
And besides talking like Joe, the blue-collar guy who has a lot to say, his statements betray fairly a two-dimensional thinking.
For instance, he's incapable of understanding that maybe the policies and culture of Wall Street are what made it possible, if not highly likely, that bad actors would eventually wipe out hundreds of billions of dollars of wealth.
Also, Captain Best and Brightest here seems to have trouble with the complexities of, say, it's not an either-or situation.
See, we can punish greedy, reckless douchebags and say Wall Street still sucks balls at the same time.
Okay, there's a little bit more of this.
In the meantime, the rest of us should hold hands, get together, collaborate.
Okay, yes.
Could you imagine what would happen if you went up to him in front of this building and tried to hold hands with him?
Yeah, let's get a real good arts commune going there.
Come on, with the Wall Street people.
You know how they like this.
He is so completely full of shit.
It's jaw drop.
It is drawdrop.
And everybody loves this guy.
This is the guy with the most ethics, ready?
Business and government together to fix the problem.
It's going to be very hard for government to do it on its own, and business can't do it without collaborating with the government.
You know what?
I would be willing to see how government does it on its own.
I would.
I would.
And by its own, I mean totally free from lobbying and corporate financing and national campaigns.
I would love to see that.
That would be nice.
That would be.
I'm pretty sure businesses can do it on its own, too.
It just won't be easy.
What with government passing laws that consistently favor big business and giving out fat government contracts and bailing out the banks and protecting a-holes like you from being murdered in the streets by angry mob of well-informed people.
Yeah.
You know, when I was a kid, I used to watch Art Link Letter had a TV show.
And he was the guy who wrote Kids Say the Darndest Things.
And every show he would interview little kids.
It was like the most popular segment.
And he asked tougher questions.
David Gregory asked of this guy.
I would have to agree with you, Frank.
He does.
You know who asked tougher questions?
Byron Allen.
Jamie Diamond.
Now you say something funny, right?
Go ahead.
Jamie Diamond, I hear you don't like the airplanes.
That's a tougher question.
Jamie Diamond, I heard you still using those credit default swaps.
Tell me about that.
Tell me how that works.
Credit default swaps.
Okay, well, Ron Paul is out of the race, ladies and gentlemen.
He's not actively campaigning.
And anybody, by the way, let's before we got anything else to say about Jamie Diamond and Wall Street and that unbelievable interview we just watched with the only thing I would say is I didn't think I could be any more cynical than I am and I am now even more cynical.
Good for you, Paul.
I know it's how do you not be a cynic watching David Gregory?
But yeah, Ron Paul, I actually called him up to see what he had.
And now I've debated about this.
Mike McRae, who you know, is hilarious, does all the great voices.
And he had an idea that we should leave in the laughing when we, because we make each other laugh.
And he's like, leave it in.
I think it'll make people laugh.
I'm like, all right, so we're going to experiment.
And here's kind of a semi-unedited phone call between me and Ron Paul.
Here we go.
I'm here with Congressman Ron Paul.
Hi, Ron.
How are you?
I'm doing fine, Jimmy.
Thanks for having me on your program, as always.
Oh, it's a pleasure to have you on, Dr. Paul.
Now, we've heard recently that you have you're going to drop, you're going to stop campaigning actively.
Now, what made you come to that decision?
Well, you know, it's all a matter of, you know, how much, how many election, you know, resources are left.
You know, you run out of money, you run out of money.
I mean, that's my message about federal government austerity.
I mean, I need to run my campaign the same way.
You'd be a hypocrite.
Okay.
Well, I don't want you to be a hypocrite, but I noticed.
I'm not going to go into debt, you know, to keep my campaign alive.
You know, I mean, I don't want my campaign to go through the same boom and bust cycle that our economy goes through because of manipulation of the financial market.
Yeah, but haven't you ever, haven't you ever borrowed money to finance something long-term?
Don't you understand how that works?
That you take on no, no.
I mean, that's the worst thing you could do to your own personal finances is to borrow money.
I mean, I know, but what about when you bought a house?
Didn't you have to borrow money to buy a house?
No, we could have, but we didn't.
So we live in a shitty little house.
Pay cash for it.
I mean, I am.
I live in a shack, brother.
I mean, one thing you can't accuse me of is being inconsistent.
Okay, no, no, you're definitely consistent.
So I've noticed that a lot of your supporters are shaking things up at the Republican conventions all across the country.
And they booed down Mitt Romney's kid the other day at a speech, at a convention speech in, I think, Arizona or Nevada.
And then we got really raucous in Oklahoma at their state Republican convention.
What's going on?
Yeah, it was definitely a raucous caucus over there.
Yes, it was a raucous caucus.
Yeah, who doesn't like saying that?
Well, yeah, I mean, of course, I mean, I mean, I mean, obviously, I wanted to be president.
I mean, that's the reason I got into the race.
I was running for president, but you have to manage your expectations.
So I'll certainly settle for being the Tyler Durden of the Republican Party.
That's sort of what I am now.
You know, I just have to be sort of various, you know, sales of activists going around causing chaos, you know, against the machine.
But what is the first thing?
I used to espouse the Austrian school of economic theory, but now I espouse the Austrian theory of silencing your political enemies through brown-shirted streets.
Okay.
And what's the first rule about Ron Paul supporters at conventions?
The first rule of the Ron Paul Club is to talk to every goddamn person you can talk to about Ron Paul until they don't want to be friends with you.
That's the first rule of the Ron Paul Club.
And the second rule of Ron Paul Club is talk to every person you know about Ron Paul until he don't want to be friends with you anymore.
And the third rule of the Ron Paul Club is that, you know, don't worry about how you're dressed or how you look.
just walk into wherever you feel.
So get out of here.
of the three.
So at any rate, is there a fourth rule, Dr. Paul?
Well, no, there wasn't.
I mean, we try to adhere to a rule three, but I mean, I guess if there were a fourth rule, it would be, you know, I don't know, black people are animals.
Oh, my God.
Did you say you heard me?
If you didn't catch it, I'll send y'all sonia for the newsletter.
Okay.
Okay.
I appreciate it.
Okay, Dr. Paul.
We look forward to not seeing you on the campaign trail, I guess.
I look forward to not being there too, Jimmy.
Okay, that was.
I like hearing you guys.
Oh, yeah.
And it went on much longer.
I had to trim it down.
We couldn't stop laughing.
But so that was Mike McRae doing great, Ron Paul.
And you know what?
I forgot to play this, but Jamie Dimon, I actually called him to try to get his reaction to that interview.
And here's Jamie Dimon.
Joining me now is JP Morgan Chase CEO Jamie Dimon to talk about the billions of dollars his company has lost.
Jimmy, stop demonizing me.
You talk as if pissing away billions in investment capital is a big deal.
That money is chump change, petty cash.
Hell, I've got a billion dollars in nickels and pennies under my couch cushions.
That's a lot of change.
I'll admit it.
Certainly is.
You should have seen what happened when I took all that change to Rouse and try to convert it into paper money.
Those damn coin style machines aren't too big to fail, that's for sure.
Well, what are you saying exactly?
I'm saying I lost a billion dollars of loose change in the coin star.
Sorry, my bad.
Mistakes happen.
No big evil.
Well, if the machine's broken, maybe all the money will spill out of it, and some folks in need will be able to grab that money.
Wait, are you saying that in this case, my handling of money might actually help everyday people?
Maybe what a horrible thing to say.
I've never used money for the common good.
That's why I'm called the smartest man on Wall Street.
Yeah, but you took investors' money and recklessly gambled with it, Jamie.
I didn't recklessly gamble with money.
I was responsible.
I'll have you know that right before every high-risk gamble, I always make a point of singing luck be a lady every time, Jimmy.
Can I help it if luck wasn't a lady?
Could I make luck not wander all over the room and blow on some other guy's dice?
Jamie, I don't even know what you're talking about now.
Of course, you don't.
You're not a smart Wall Street guy like me.
Hell, you're not even a good interviewer.
If you're a real pro like David Gregory, you'd be asking me softball questions with no follow-up.
Well, come on, seriously, Jamie.
Don't you think there should be more regulations in the financial industry?
Are you kidding?
What for?
Look, me and my colleagues have lost billions of dollars of other people's money and almost destroyed the economy in the United States of America.
And yet, we dad, we haven't gone to jail and we're still making obscene amounts of money.
We don't need regulation, Jimmy.
The system works.
I think I'm gonna go throw up now.
You're about to lose your launch.
Yet, you criticize me when I lose a fortune.
What?
Karen, I need that cocaine for later.
We all differ, Jimmy.
So stop demonizing Wall Street.
You know, I'll stop demonizing you guys when you stop being so reckless.
I am not reckless.
Now, excuse me, our time is up and I have to leave.
I've got to go oversee my new investment, building a nuclear reactor on top of an active volcano.
So long, Jimmy.
Okay, bye, Jamie.
You're a criminal.
The Jimmy Door show is available as a podcast for free on iTunes.
Or for other ways to subscribe, go to JimmyDoorComedy.com.
And while you're there, you can listen to past episodes and you can comment on them too.
Remember, Jimmy spells his last name, D-O-R-E, JimmyDoorComedy.com.
Don't forget, May 20th, this Sunday, May 20th, 8 p.m.
Left, Right, and Ridiculous.
We're doing it at the Improv Lab, Melrose and Crescent Heights this Sunday, 8 p.m.
Links are at JimmyDoorComedy.com, plus May 23rd, University of California, Riverside.
Look out.
We're coming to do Apocalypse 5, May 23rd, University of California, Riverside.
Links at jimmydorecomedy.com.
Thank you.
Bye.
Okay, right now I'm going to give us a special treat.
We haven't heard from Jesse Ventura in quite a while, so we're going to go with okay.
So right now, it's time for a special treat.
Jesse Ventura was on the show a few months ago, and we were talking to him about why he wasn't allowed into the presidential Republican presidential debates because he was not allowed.
And so he had this to say.
And just enjoy.
Here we were talking to Jesse Ventura a few months ago.
Yeah.
Hello, is this Jesse Ventura?
Are we on?
It depends on who's calling.
Is this Jimmy Door from KPFK?
Yes, this is Merry Christmas, Jesse.
Well, I don't celebrate any Christian holidays, but I will wish you a happy solstice.
Oh, thank you very much.
I have to guard this line.
This is a protected line on the phone.
And I don't accept any calls from bill collectors or intelligence operatives.
So, Jesse, how come you're not in the debates?
Well, that's the question that I've been asking, and all I'm doing is asking questions.
Let me tell you why my theory that I've put together so far in consultation with a number of experts.
Okay.
My understanding is that they simply can't handle the caliber of truth that I would unleash on them in a debate format.
I believe right now that if I chose to enter the race, and I've said numerous times that I'm not going to, but if I get as a right-hand candidate, you're telling me you're telling me that there's enough literate Republican voters that I would get any traction?
I don't think so.
I think I'd have a clean sweep of the literate vote, but that's only 20 to 25 percent of the Iowa Caucasus.
Well, what I'm saying is if I was in the debate, Jimmy, what you would see, what you would see would be a supernova of truth, the things that the mainstream media couldn't contain.
Because the first thing I do on stage is I would go up in that debate and I would tear Mitt Romney's heart out of his chest and then pull his heart out of his chest like the Predator did to me.
And I would hold it up.
I would hold it up for everyone to see.
And it would be flip-flopping around in my bare hands just to show everybody what he stands for, which is his heart.
Which is flip-flopping.
That's all that's in his blood.
And I would drink his blood and I would spit some of it out.
And then I and then I would shove the heart still beating of Rick Perry's ass.
And then hate Rick Perry would be crapping Mormon blood for the rest of his life.
And let me tell you, if you have a Mormon heart and you're cool, and you really are going to have a hard time coming up with a third answer.
Do you hear me, mean Gene?
I hear you.
I hear you, Jesse.
And then the next step is I take that fat fuck, Newt Dingrich, and I put him in a suplex and I squeeze him until all his cholesterol shot out and squirt it all over the stage.
Right over Donald Trump's hairpiece and everything.
And then I take Ron Paul, and you know I've supported Ron Paul at times.
I think he's doing some good things, but out of sheer inertia, I would attack him as well.
And I would bite his hand off.
I'd bite off Ron Paul's head and I'd spit it into John Hutchman's scratch.
And then I'd have a good laugh like a walrus victorious over his meeting rock as Ron Paul's headless torso flailed around on the stage.
And then just to celebrate, I'd grab Michelle Bachman and I'd give her a hard humping that she's been craving.
And she'd go back to that Jim J. Bullock husband of hers.
And let me tell you something, Gorilla Montsu.
I'd have a threesome with the two of them.
Two-on-one handicap match.
That's the kind of commitment.
And the mainstream media doesn't want that.
You bring that kind of truth.
And guess what they're going to do?
You know exactly what they're going to do at that DBIC.
The pundits, which the pundits are going to start in with their commentary and their little analysis.
And they're going to say that staking a heart, a Brick Perry sphincter is a strategic mistake.
I saw it all when I was governor in Minnesota.
Those little 80 worms are going to say that extracting the lard out of Dick Gingrich's smelly body was some kind of political gas.
And they're going to say that decapitating Ron Paul is not only alienating independent voters, but that it's that it's self-sabotage for my own gosh.
And they're going to say that I would have a hard time coming from behind, even though I just came from behind into Michelle Bachman.
Even with the evidence of Mitt Romney as a mutilated corpse in a pool of his own blood and puke and piss, they're still going to call him the front runner.
That's what's happening now.
They're setting up Barack Obama to win against whoever runs, whether I've gotten my hands on him or not.
So, Jimmy, I guess that answers your question.
That's why I'm not in the race.
That's why I'm down in Mexico just simply practicing to be the best surfer that I can be.
I didn't know.
I am occasionally.
I am occasionally driving up to Southern California to do a number of reconnaissance missions.
And you may have seen that I was recently pulled over for tailgating.
That was a that was a venture wildcat intelligence operation right in the sea mailing.
I did not, I did not see you get pulled over for tailgating.
I was pulled over, but let me tell you something.
All I handed when I did, I grabbed those two officers and I put them both in a camel clutch.
What's up?
What is a camel clutch?
A camel clutch.
You let me tell you, if you don't know what it is, you're better off for it, Jimmy Dorse.
Okay.
Okay.
You know what?
I have, I have to go do some recon.
We're having some intruders.
They're at the perimeter.
Hold on, we've got some intruders.
They're violating the parameters at the perimeter.
I gotta strike.
I gotta go handle this.
And Tura won over and out.
Okay.
Special thanks to James Domian, the hilarious, inimitable James Adomian.
Doing the voice of Jesse Ventura.
You can reach James Domian at jamesadomian.com.
And now here's another special treat.
Paula Dean, unfortunately, was diagnosed with diabetes.
She kept it a secret and kept teaching people how to cook unhealthy foods till she got a sponsorship to promote a diabetes drug.
Then she told everybody she had it.
Anyway, she called into the show just a few weeks ago.
Hey, Jimmy, it's your favorite southern cooking lady, Paula Dane.
As you may have heard on news, I got diagnosed with a serious case of the sugars.
I've decided to change my lifestyle.
Are you going to eat that?
That cupcake.
I've decided to change my lifestyle and my cooking so I exhibit a lifestyle of moderation.
Oh, give me that.
Ow!
Ow.
Ow.
Yeah.
You're going to see some serious changes on the Paula Dane show as I deal with the serious condition known as sugars.
So I, what's that, a dust bunny?
So catch me every Friday at 3 p.m. on the Southern Cooking Channel or whatever it is that you watch Paula Dane.
And remember, until next time, you aka, you can't have no ding dang fat southern barbecue bird ding dang without home again.
That was the hilarious Mike McRae, the multi-talented impressionist Mike McGray doing the Paula Dean voices.
And right now, it's time.
Well, it's uh, we're going to explain what's coming up, but you know, we are good friends with Jay Tomlinson from Best to the Left, and he's got a great idea on how you can help on helping you help support lefty radio.
Here we are.
We sat down.
We talked with Jay from Best of the Left just a few days ago.
Okay.
All right.
So I'm here with Jay Tomlinson from Best of the Left, and he's got a great new idea for a way to help lefties support their favorite progressive media, right?
And Jay, what is this idea?
Okay, so this idea in a nutshell is the best analogy I can come up with is to compare it to cable companies.
Cable companies do a brilliant job of raising money for themselves by bundling their services and making it really simple for people to pay for a whole bunch of stuff all at once.
And so with progressive media, you know, the business model of shows like ours is to raise money directly from our listeners.
It's the best way to create a really solid base of support.
You don't have to depend on advertisements.
It's awesome.
But what it's created is a system where people who want to support a whole bunch of different shows really have to go through the laborious process of signing up for multiple memberships on different websites.
They have all these different payments they're managing.
And so we've actually started receiving requests directly from listeners saying, isn't there a better way that I could do this?
You know, I love supporting you guys.
I want to keep doing it.
But if you could make it easier for me, I would really appreciate it.
And besides that, if you make it easier, other people would probably be more willing to support in the first place.
And so we're going to sort of steal from that, you know, like the cable company model and create a system where we're going to allow shows to be bundled in that way, but we're going to leave out the evil part from the cable companies where they force you to pay for a bunch of stuff you don't want and allow the magic of the new media system where you, you know, you only watch what you want to watch.
You only listen to what you want to listen to.
And of course, you only pay for what you want to support.
And so what we've, what we are in the middle of building is called ourblue media at ourblue media.com.
It's under construction as we speak.
And what it's going to be is a hub site where you'll be able to support all of your progressive media outlets that you want all in one place.
That sounds easy enough, right?
And but right now You're asking people to donate for funds to help you build the site, correct?
Exactly.
So the philosophy behind the site is really to integrate the ideals of progressivism into this system that's going to support progressives.
So for me, the fundamental idea of progressivism is working together.
We're stronger together than we are individually.
That's what's going to, that's what the system is going to allow people to do.
When we all work together, we will all be able to raise more money more efficiently, all of those sorts of things.
And so we want to integrate that same philosophy into actually the way it's constructed because we recognize that so many people are going to be supportive of the idea.
They're going to be really excited about it and they're going to want to help make it a reality.
And so we're looking to raise $15,000, which is the amount needed for the initial round of development costs, basically.
You got to pay really smart people who know how to design websites to make it happen.
So right now, ourbluemedia.com goes not to the website itself, but to our fundraising page, which just launched on May 1st.
We've been talking about it in all the outlets we're able to.
My show, Best of the Left.
I'm partnered with the Young Turks, a mutual friend of ours, as well as David Packman.
And so between the three of us, we've been launching it.
We've been pushing it out everywhere we can.
The response has been amazingly positive.
And we've already raised nearly half of our goal of $15,000 in the first week.
So just, it really gives you a sense of how passionate people get about it.
You know, lots of people are saying, either I've been waiting for an idea like this, or you guys are all geniuses.
I didn't even know I wanted this, but now that I have the idea, I can't wait for it to exist.
And so, and people are super excited.
We have over 70 donors that have added, yeah, that have added up to about $7,000 already.
So that's the campaign we're pushing right now.
And then that's an average of $100 a donor.
That's right.
Wow, that's a pretty good average.
Tell me about it.
So, I mean, it's a testament to the idea.
I think so.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And so thanks to these donors, we're going to make this a reality.
And once it is, I'll come back on and tell your listeners that it exists.
And you and me and every other progressive media outlet, be it a podcast or a TV show or a blog or someone with a Twitter feed who does such a good job that they can get their followers to donate money.
You know, if it qualifies as progressive media, you're in.
And that's the idea.
All right.
That sounds like a great idea.
I'm all for it.
And so now where do people go if they want to donate?
It is ourblue media.com.
And so they go there and there's more information and they can make a donation to help get this website up and going.
Absolutely.
Yeah.
All the details are laid out, even a few more details than I was able to get to just talking to you.
And as thanks, you know, again, this whole progressive idea we're pushing, in addition to just thanking you for your donation, we're actually going to have a page on the site that lists all of the people who have donated just $20 or more to the campaign as a permanent thank you and testament to the power of the community that came together to make it a reality.
Okay.
Power to the people.
Exactly.
Okay.
All right, Jay.
Is there anything else you want to add?
No, I think that was it.
Okay, good job.
All right.
So go to ourblue media.com.
Get on board.
I'm on board.
Excellent.
Thanks, Jimmy.
And now, you're not going to allow David Feldman to be part of this, are you?
Hey, don't forget, we'll see you this Sunday, May 20th for Left, Right, and Ridiculous, the funniest blend of stand-up sketch and some of the funniest video clips of people saying the dumbest stuff you ever heard.
That's this Sunday, May 20th at the Improv Lab, which has at Melrose and Crescent Heights in Los Angeles.
And it's at the, you know, there's no drink minimum at the Improv Lab.
There's no drink minimum.
You have to buy.
So you just pay for the ticket and you get right in.
Isn't that nice?
That is nice.
Okay, so we'll see you there.
Tickets only $10.
And it is hilarious.
It's a fun time.
People drove up from San Diego to see this show last time.
How nice is that?
Okay, so we'll see you May 20th at the Left, Right, and Ridiculous at the Improv Lab.
Okay, and today's show was written.
That's right.
Today's show was written by Robert Yasimer of Frank Kahnov, Steve Rosenfield, Mike McRae, and Steph Samurano.
And special thanks to Mike McRae for really knocking it out of the park this week again with his hilarious impressions.
And also thanks, special thanks to James and Domian doing Jesse Ventura.
James and Domian can be reached at jamesadomian.com, MikeMcRae at mikemcray.com.
And I want to give a shout out to the two gentlemen who donate their time and talent to the Jimmy Door show to make it all possible.
First up is Sean James.
He takes care of our Macintosh computers, which is how we do the show here on our Macintoshes.
And he's a genius and he can help fix your Macintosh if it's not working over the phone.
Oh, no.
No, he'll do it right over the internet.
That's right.
Over the iChat.
It's amazing to watch.
So how do you reach him?
Do you give him an email at machelp at seanjames.com and you spell his name S-H-A-U-N Machelp at SeanJames.com.
And I want to thank Frank Pulaski, who does all the great videos for the show.
He takes some of our comedy bits, a lot of the phone calls, and he puts video to them in an amazing artistic way.
That's Frank Pulaski at Dreamtime Films does an amazing job on the editing.
Thanks to him.
And that's it for this week.
We'll see you next week.
▲
Export Selection