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Nov. 25, 2011 - Jimmy Dore Show
59:15
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The kind of people that are telling us maybe on tearing down our nation.
It's the show that makes Anderson Cooper say.
And now, here's a guy who sounds a lot like me.
It's Jimmy Doer.
Hi, everybody, and welcome to this week's Jimmy Dore show.
I am joined in studio from Dinner in a Movie on TVS and from the Mental Illness Happy Hour podcast.
It's Paul Gilmartin.
Hi, Paul.
Happy Thanksgiving, Jim.
Oh, happy Thanksgiving.
Are you thankful, Paul?
I am.
Many things I'm thankful for.
What's the biggest thing you're thankful for?
That you finally got the equipment working.
Okay.
And next to him usually is Frank Conniff.
Frank is home getting cable installed today, ladies and gentlemen.
It's a big day.
What's that a euphemism for?
And I wish it was.
Is that what I think it is?
Yeah.
Yeah, he's getting some cable laid, huh?
No, I wish it was.
And, you know, if he's going to miss the show, I will only take an excuse as serious as that.
Okay.
I feel like Frank Sinatra and Tom Dreessen told me he's got a softball game.
Okay.
And over to my right, a former writer for the Daily Show, hilarious stand-up comedian.
It's Steve Rosenfield.
Hey, Steve, how are you?
Hey, Jimmy.
All right.
Happy Thanksgiving.
Oh, happy Thanksgiving to you.
And what are you thankful for?
We'll fix that in post.
Okay, I guess we're going to stick that.
Okay.
You know what?
I got some.
Some people called in and gave me a happy Thanksgiving.
Hey, Jimmy, this is Mitt Romney.
I'd like to say a hearty happy Thanksgiving to you and all of your listeners at KPFK, Los Angeles, and all affiliated broadcast entities.
Remember to pray to God and say what you're thankful for.
Because that doesn't creep anyone out ever when you say that publicly in front of other people.
So I'm looking forward to having some turkey and pumpkin pie and some mashed potatoes.
Yes.
Actually, I'm watching my cards, so I won't be having too many of those.
What do I have to be thankful for?
I'm unemployed.
Ha ha.
Just like all sorts of other slubs in this country.
Yes.
Okay, that was Mitt Romney.
Rip Torn.
Want to hear Rip Torn?
Yeah.
Well, you know what?
John Boehner was very quick.
Let's see what he has to say.
Hey, Jimmy, this is John Boehner.
I'm thankful that I am Speaker of the goddamn House of Fucking Representatives.
Wow.
Okay, that was it.
And he's out.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But then Rip Torn called me, and he had this to say.
Merry Christmas, Jimmy.
For God's sake.
Remember, remember to say what you're thankful for.
And tidy Tim and all of that.
Oh, Honky.
Happy Turkey Day, Jim Jam.
I'm thankful for many things.
I'm thankful for my strong constitution that's allowed me to be a morning drinker.
I'm thankful for the fact that 30 years ago, that rabid Ty hooker only bit half of the tip of my penis sauce.
If you're tired of being around the family all day, come on afterwards with me and we'll get fucked up.
Okay, so those are some of our quick Thanksgiving Day wishes.
And what's coming up on today's show?
Well, you know, there was a pepper spray incident that happened up at UC Davis.
And did you see the video?
I did.
Peaceful students being pepper sprayed on the UC Davis campus is raising the question.
Is law enforcement going over the top in America in dealing with protests?
That is the question.
Is law enforcement going over the top?
We're going to answer that question.
And we'll also answer the question, it's water wet.
Coming up later on today's show, we're going to talk about pepper spray and the concerted effort to downplay the effects of what it really is on Fox News.
They said it wasn't so bad.
They said it wasn't so bad.
They said it was just, well, we'll talk about it.
We're going to talk about it.
Plus, we're going to talk about all the different ways that they described the Occupy Wall Street protesters last week.
And we're going to get, I actually called the UC Davis Police Department.
I had a phone call with the information director.
I have it recorded.
We're going to play it today.
And that's coming up.
Plus, we have phone calls from Herman Kane.
We have phone calls from, well, that guy from UC Davis is going to call us.
And a lot lot more that's coming up today on the Jimmy Door show.
Time for another installment of Oh My God.
Okay, now in today's Oh My God segment, you know, it's another one of those weeks.
I had a million things to choose from.
And what did I end up choosing?
Well, Herman Kane, you know, he's catching a lot of heat for not knowing stuff.
But he has a good reason why he doesn't know stuff, right?
You know, I've said before, the more Herman Kane talks, the more I think the pizza business pretty much runs itself.
But here he is explaining why he doesn't know stuff.
Ready?
We've got plenty of experts.
And a leader knows how to use those experts.
We need a leader, not a reader.
You've got to be kidding me.
You have got to be kidding me.
We need a leader, not a reader.
Is this The Simpsons?
Oh, my God.
He knows how to rhyme.
Oh, Jimmy.
Hey, okay, so maybe Herman Kane is totally unqualified to be president, but at least he's arrogant about it.
And I know what he means.
Once people start reading, it's just a slippery slope before they start thinking, reasoning, and voting for someone else.
Very shortly afterwards, right?
It's funny that he doesn't have an expert around to tell him, hey, don't tell people you don't read.
Where's that expert?
He doesn't have that expert around anywhere.
Audaciously, Kane stares down his arch enemy, knowledge.
He's got a lot of guts.
He really shut up all those eggheads who think the president should know stuff, which is what I...
Think of all the energy.
Think of the savings.
You know what I say?
First, they came for the librarians.
And I said nothing because I was president.
All right.
So that's Herman's camp.
So I'm good.
That was a good Oh My God segment.
That was a great one.
Shocking.
I was starting to lose my confidence in your ability to pick an Oh My God segment.
Okay, well there you go.
I got it.
I got the oh my God.
There's a lot.
The whole show today is going to be oh my God, but that was today's.
This has been Oh my God.
Oh my God.
Okay, now let's move on real quickly to we all saw what happened, the pepper spray incident right up at UC Davis, right?
there were some students that were peacefully protesting.
And well, what happened was the cops felt threatened, right?
Because when you're sitting down on the ground with your arms locked and your head down, it's just a matter of time before you spring like a like a copra.
Yes.
Before you throw those shoulders back and slowly get up off the sidewalk awkwardly.
Yeah.
So the guy took out the guy, Lieutenant John Pike from the UC Davis Police Defense.
He took out what looked like something you would spray your garden with.
Right?
It looked like...
For a second, I thought he was going to make it disappear.
He waved it around like a magician.
Now you see your civil rights.
Now you don't.
Well, nothing up my sleeve.
But I'm going to make your civil rights disappear.
That's right.
Yeah, that's very good.
So I get so.
Before we get into all of that, first of all, it was funny to hear how they described it on Fox and Friends and Friends.
No, this was actually Megan Kelly and Bill O'Reilly talking about, you know, pepper, it's pepper spray.
It wasn't.
So what they had to do is they had to downplay what happened.
To justify their punishment fetish.
Because right, the far right has a punishment fetish.
They just, that is, is that stirs their soul unlike nothing else.
Unlike nothing else, almost.
You're right.
That is, it is weird.
So here's how they talk about it.
First of all, pepper spray.
That just burns your eyes, right?
Right.
I mean, it just burns your eyes.
It just burns your eyes, right?
It just burns your eyes.
That's not a sensitive part of the body.
It just burns your eyes.
Now, were there people making too big of a deal about it?
I heard somebody describing it, and this kid was acting as if he had been dragged into a concentration camp.
I thought that was a little over the top, but still, it is an absolute violation of civil rights.
Oh, it's not even.
Yeah, it really hurts.
Yeah.
Plus, it hurts.
Plus, it really hurts.
It's supposed to hurt.
It is.
More to this clip, by the way.
There's more to this clip.
First of all, pepper spray.
That just burns your eyes, right?
Right.
I mean, it's like a derivative of actual pepper.
It's a food product, essentially.
Yeah.
You know what?
If they think pepper spray is a food, I'd like to take Megan Kelly to dinner.
How about that?
Really?
Yeah.
You know, and lead bullets are really just essentially fat pencils.
That's really LAR.
And billy clubs are really just tickle sticks.
Really?
That's really what they are.
Essentially, there's tickle sticks.
That's right.
Yeah, I've been tickled with them.
So that's what.
And then they also said that they were, they tried to, they said the pepper spray wasn't even that strong.
Here's what they had to say.
A lot of experts are looking at that and saying, is that the real deer?
Has it been diluted?
Because they should have more of a reaction.
Yeah, but yeah, yeah.
A lot of the experts, a lot of the experts.
You mean like you?
You mean like bought and paid for corporate tools will say anything?
Even downplay brutality by cops against college students, protesting higher tuition, even that, those kind of experts?
Yes, those are the experts.
Yeah, those were nerf billy clubs.
I don't know if you noticed.
Those are nerf billy clubs.
Sure.
Any comments?
Okay, so we don't have to comment on that.
We can go right to the so I got so upset that I called the UC Davis and I said, I got to talk to somebody.
I got to get it, you know, some kind of something.
And so they called the police station.
I wanted to know what their policy was.
If their policy when confronted by peaceful, nonviolent protesters, if your policy was to then use violence and chemical weapons on them, because that seemed like that was their policy.
So no, they pushed me off to the information office at UC Davis, and I talked to a guy named Andy Fell.
Andy Fell.
Okay, so here's my conversation.
Here's my first conversation with Andy Fell.
And it doesn't, he's not very helpful.
Here we go.
Okay, what is the procedure for pepper spraying students at the school?
What is the policy?
The situation was.
And let me just stop it right here and say, this is a real guy.
This is not Mike McRae.
Okay.
All right.
This is a guy named Andy Fell from the information office from UC Davis.
And that was really how long he took the pause when I asked him that question because he wasn't expecting that question.
Okay.
Let's start.
Here we go.
Let's start off in the topic.
Okay, what is the what is the procedure for pepper spraying students at the school?
What is the policy?
The situation was so the police had, after several warnings, moved into removing pamphlet in the center of the quad and made some arrests while they were doing that.
They're attempting to leave the scene with the people they'd arrested, and a group of protesters had surrounded them and blocked their way.
Okay, well, and have you seen the videotape?
I have seen the videotape, yeah.
And it doesn't seem like anyone's blocking anyone's way whatsoever.
Well, the videotape doesn't give you all the content.
You can see that there are people at the arms locked sitting on the ground off in the path.
I see people sitting on the ground with their arms locked peacefully, and then cops coming in violently, chemically weapons assaulting them.
Is that what happened?
The people were sitting on the ground with their arms locked, encircling the police so they couldn't get out was the people they'd arrested.
In circling, they were encircling the police.
It did not look like a circle to me.
It looked like they were just blocking a sidewalk.
Couldn't be more peaceful.
Could not be more peaceful.
Yes.
And by the way, the cops stepped over those kids to pepper spray them.
They weren't blocking the sidewalk.
They stepped right over them.
Okay.
Well, if they had to drag a person out and they weren't circling them, that would be blocking them because you can't drag a person over people sitting there.
Yeah.
Okay.
Okay.
So they were peacefully sitting on the ground.
They refused police instructions to move.
They were told repeatedly to move.
They could have moved.
So is it your policy when non-violent people are peacefully assembling and protesting that you then use violence and chemical weapons on them?
Is that your policy?
We strive to conduct debate in a civilized way on this campus.
Well, it wasn't very civilized.
It didn't look very civilized, did it?
Is that it real quick?
Did it look very civilized to you, the videotape?
So your policy, I just want to get, and I just want to know what your official policy is.
Is your official policy when people are peacefully and non-violently protesting to violently and chemically assault them?
Is that your policy?
I want to know what your policy is.
The police need to make an operational decision in their own safety.
For their safety?
If the people are obstructing the way of the police and they're trying to leave the scene with protesters and refuse to move and cannot be moved by hand, then the police have to make a decision about how they're going to handle that situation.
So it's your policy that when people are peacefully assembling and non-violently protesting to violently disrupt them and violently use chemical weapons.
Is that your policy?
The police may have to use various methods to get people to move out of the Way when they needed to move.
Those were violent methods.
Those were not non-violent.
The police used violent methods.
So is it your policy that the police can use violent methods with non-violent, peaceful protesters on the campus of UC Davis?
I'm asking you a straight question.
Can you answer a straight question?
What I'm saying is, police all over this country.
I'm asking about UC Davis.
I'm not asking about all over this country.
I'm asking about UC Davis a straight question.
Can you answer a straight question?
Is it the policy of the UC Davis Police Department to use violent and chemical weapons on peacefully violent demonstrators?
Is that your policy?
Can you answer that?
That's an impossible question.
What?
It's a straight question.
Sounds like you're a little embarrassed about your police department.
Are you embarrassed about your police department?
You're distorting.
You're distorting the whole argument.
I'm distorting.
The police are trained to use various methods, crowd control.
You mean violent method?
When they need to exit an area, then they may need to use, they may need to ask protesters to move.
They may need to hand manhand.
You mean violent methods?
You mean violent methods?
Is it the policy of the UC police department to use violent methods and chemical weapons on peacefully assembled people?
Is that your policy?
They use pepper spray.
Sorry, say again.
They use pepper spray.
So that's a chemical weapon, is it not?
Is pepper spray a chemical weapon?
They use pepper spray.
You're having a hard time with this with really simple questions.
I don't really think you're interested in getting it.
You just already know what you think.
I don't really know why you're asking me.
I want to get what your official policy is, and you don't know what it is.
Can you hand me off to someone who can answer a direct question?
What I'm telling you is that the police are trying to use different methods of crowd control.
Hey, if you can't answer a direct question, that's not my problem, okay?
But if you don't want to answer a direct question, just say so.
I'm trying to answer your question.
What is the policy?
That's the question we're trying to get to.
Do you, as your policy, that you use violent chemical?
First of all, is pepper spray a chemical weapon?
Can you answer that?
Excuse me, where's Eagle going?
We're going in here.
Why is that guy still on the line with you?
Okay, so I don't know.
So I don't know if you could, I don't know if you could hear what happened right at the end, but students had surrounded the building and they started to come in the building where they were meeting, right?
The chancellor was in there.
He was in there.
A bunch of people were in there.
The chancellor of the schooler of Germany.
He was on his way.
So it sounded like Ariana Huffington's the chancellor of that school.
I don't know if you saw it, but so she's the chancellor.
And so I had what who I actually had called was I called the cell phone of the Claudia.
I'm blanking on her last name.
She's the information director.
It rings her cell phone, right?
She answers and hands it off to this guy, Andy Fell, right?
Because they're at a meeting.
There's stuff's going on right now.
So he, so he's dealing with me out in the hallway.
And then all of a sudden, kids show up out in the hallway from the school.
And he's like, what are you doing in here?
You can't come in.
And they go, this is a public university.
You can't come in here.
You're interloping.
And then he just hangs up.
Interloping.
So I immediately call back, right?
And he answers, but he doesn't say anything.
But I can hear what's going on in the background.
So I hear like there's like a scuffle happening and people are yelling.
And then he hangs up again.
So I call right back again and he answers the phone again, but he doesn't talk again and he holds it.
He's just so I can hear what's happening.
So I'm like, why is he doing this?
Why is he answering the phone and letting me hear what's happening there?
I can hear students and I hear like administrators and they're trying to negotiate what's going on in there.
And all I could figure out was that they were out there negotiating with these students who had come into the building.
He had his boss's phone.
He didn't know how to turn off the ringer on his boss's phone.
So I keep calling and it's ringing in his hand.
So he looks like a jackass in the middle of this tense situation.
His phone's ringing.
So he answers it, but doesn't talk.
So I get to hear.
So that happened like six times.
Or he's more on your side than he can officially state.
So he wants you to hear what is actually going on without it actually coming from him.
That is the most generous reading of that I could ever imagine.
It sounded like that guy was on my side, didn't it?
It sounded like that guy.
The guy said, listen, it's Peppa Spray.
It's Peppa Spray.
As if it was a slinky.
If they can't move by hand, they will be moved by spice.
Yeah.
He's like, it's Peppa Spray.
You know, like they're talking about silly strings.
Fresh ground pepper spray.
First of all, do you should you use pepper spray if you have 30 seconds to use pepper spray?
Right.
Is it ever justified if it's if it doesn't have to be used in a hurry?
Well, according to the handbook for California universities, you're only supposed to use it in self-defense.
And if someone is resisting arrest, right?
Like if you're, if you have, if the only way you can arrest them is it's a non-lethal way to subdue someone.
Well, that's not what they had to do.
Right.
That's not what they, that's not what they're doing.
If they were trying to cuff those people and they were wriggling around, then that would fall under maybe, maybe that would, yeah, but certainly not.
They just use it for non-compliance.
I gave you an order and you're not following it.
I'm going to pepper spray you.
I'm going to, I'm going to, you know, that's that's not okay.
You're not supposed to be able to do that to peaceful, non-violent people.
You can't walk up to someone who's standing there and not threatening you and hit them in the head with a baton, no matter what they did wrong before, right?
You can't go into court.
There's a murderer, hit him in the head with a baton.
You can't do these things to people who aren't acting violently at the moment.
Right.
Okay.
Okay.
Let me just remind people, this is the Jimmy Doerr show.
And if you missed any part of today's show, you want to hear our Thanksgiving wishes again or anything, you can always get a podcast of this show for free at iTunes or you can listen to it at my website, jimmydoorcomedy.com.
You can download it there for free.
Listen to it for free.
And we always like when you comment on the episode.
And Dora spelled D-O-R-E.
D-O-R-E is correct.
Okay, so you know, I actually called that Andy Fell back again.
So after they had, so that was their official, that was Saturday.
So their story changed.
That was the 19th of November.
So their story changed that day.
So that's when the chancellor came out and said she was horrified by what the cops did.
And so that's when they pretty much realized they screwed up.
Was there an official statement that they mistook the protesters for a bland pizza?
I think that they tried that.
They did try that.
So I called him back again.
This is shorter than the other one here.
So they had changed their tune.
So I wanted to, it's funny, right?
So I, because I have them on tape saying all that stuff.
Listen, they would, okay, so here we go.
Jimmy, I have a whole load of attachments to the entire policy and protocol that I can send to you.
And, you know, I haven't read it.
I'm not familiar with it.
I'm just going to you and you can read what the policy is.
Okay, so what just happened was he said he's going to send me the cops had just sent him all these documents, the protocol about how they handle things.
And he goes, I'm going to send it to you.
He goes, I haven't read it.
He hasn't read it.
He's going to send it to me.
Neither had they, actually.
And apparently, and I found that to be funny.
That's hilarious.
You're going to send me some information that you haven't read?
Well, it's the police department protocol.
I haven't read every police department.
That's hilarious.
Well, the protocols I read said that the police aren't allowed to use chemical weapons on the peaceful protesters.
Well, Jimmy, let me just send this stuff to you, and then you can read our own protocol.
Well, you can't give me a statement from the school.
I'm calling the information office, correct?
Yeah.
Okay, so you can't give me a second.
I'm telling you, I can send you the whole stuff.
It's just come to me this morning, and I can forward it all to you, and then you can read it for yourself.
Well, I'm reading from the University of California's University Police Policies and Administrative Procedures.
It says chemical agents are weapons.
Remember, you weren't sure about that on Saturday.
You said pepper spray wasn't a chemical weapon.
Remember, you said that.
I'm going to send you the information.
Otherwise, I'm going to hang up and get on another call.
Andy, this is coming straight from the university procedures.
Okay, so this isn't my definition.
This is your definition.
Jimmy.
Do you remember that?
There are departments specific procedures.
Now, if you want me to send you the police department, I can do that right now.
So my email, I'll give you my email.
My email is.
And Andy, let me just say you're not very helpful.
You're like the least helpful person I've ever spoken to at UC Davis.
Jimmy, I have a lot of people I'm trying to help.
I will send you those things like that.
And you're not helping, but you're not helping me at all.
You're not giving me any information.
In fact, you won't even answer a direct question again.
You won't answer it.
I do not know the answer to that question.
I'm about to afford you the information, Hasie.
Well, can you hand me off to somebody who can answer a straight question, Andy?
Because you have a really hard time with this stuff.
Okay, and then I'm shocked he stayed on the phone with you as long as he did.
We need to cross-pollinate you with the journalists of America.
I think he was getting a lot of those maybe phone calls.
You know, I'm sure a lot of people are upset.
Well, he probably hadn't been given an official statement from the people above him yet, so we couldn't give one.
He didn't want to lose his job.
You know, I can kind of understand where the guy's coming from.
And the chancellor did wind up apologizing.
I don't know if you saw the footage of her.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It seems very sincere.
It seems sincere to me.
It seemed the opposite of it.
It seems like she's a bitch.
Oh, I couldn't disagree more.
She does not want to fall out of being the 1%.
She does not want to.
I disagree.
She does not want to lose her $500,000 a year job.
And that's all that is.
She's dead inside.
She ordered riot police onto her own goddamn campus, Paul.
She ordered riot police onto her campus to take care of students because they were protesting, A, they were protesting higher tuition, and B, they were protesting previous police brutality at the UC Berkeley.
So it was a dual protest.
They were protesting that.
Did you see that tape?
No.
So at UC Berkeley, the week previous, the cops just started, just started beating girls with their petons, jamming them, and it's on videotape, and it's really horrific.
So they just start beating them.
The kids are just standing there with their hands up, and they just start hating them.
The cops.
So it's another police riot.
So everybody, so all these demonstrations, by the way, are perfectly peaceful until the cops show up.
And as soon as the cops get there, then it's a big problem.
Everybody's violent.
Everybody's got a problem.
So again, it's a bunch of brain-dead cops who I'm just following orders.
I don't want to lose my job.
It's just like, that's the worst excuse to brutalize somebody because I'm doing it for money because I might lose my job.
I'm going to brutalize you for money.
That's really what that is.
And you know, you're a human for money, though, Jimmy.
It is a lot of money.
You're a human.
You're a human being first and a hired gun second.
That's what I think.
You know what?
Let's get to Herman Kane.
Should we get to Herman?
Sure.
You know what?
We don't have time for Herman in this half of the hour, but let's get to.
I actually called Andy Fell back today.
Oh, yeah?
Yeah.
So Andy Fell, good to talk to you, buddy.
Hello.
Sorry, I was able to take your call earlier.
We had to go grab some lunch.
Oh, really?
What'd you have for lunch?
Well, you see, we got in the car and we drove Chipotle.
Yeah, so just can you just ask?
I mean, you have to understand.
We got in the car and drove to Chipotle.
And then we parked.
And then I don't need them.
That's great.
You got a burrito, and how was it?
I don't even understand.
What do you mean?
How was it?
I'm sorry, Andy.
I was just asking.
That question doesn't even make sense.
Andy, it's just.
Are you literally asking?
I mean.
Yes, I'm asking you.
You're asking about the food that I consumed midday.
Yes.
And what my opinion of it was?
Yes.
I mean, I'm sorry.
I think you're just trying to call and start an argument.
I mean, the question is.
I mean, that makes no sense.
There's no logic behind that at all.
I mean, for example, if I were just to simply say I had a bucket of pomegranates for lunch, would you have asked me the same question?
How were they?
Andy, I just asked you a straight question.
How was your lunch?
And if you don't want to tell me, and if you can't answer it, that's fine.
Oh, don't.
No, don't do that, Milo.
Andy, I'm just asking you a question.
That's all.
It's a straight question.
No, no.
I'm just asking you a question.
That's it.
You're not just asking me a question.
You're trying to provide, you know, I mean, the very transparent thing I'm doing, you're asking how my lunch was, and then you're trying to be an agitator.
An agitator.
We don't have time for that.
What are you talking about?
We're very busy at the UC Davis Police Department.
I got it.
With our severe beatings and our pepper spraying.
Okay, Andy.
It's a good talk.
All right, Jimmy.
Hey, what are you hearing?
Check out.
You're not supposed to be here.
What's it?
Put that down.
What?
It sounds like.
Get off of that chandelier.
That's not built to hold people.
Are there people coming into this?
Get off of the dead bad hand is both for you.
Get off of the police station immediately.
Andy.
Wow, chandeliers in the police station.
That's fancy.
He had his hands.
That was Andy Fell from UC Davis as done by Mike McRae.
And this is the Jimmy Door show on Pacifica.
Okay, podcast listeners.
Are you enjoying today's show?
Happy Thanksgiving.
I'm thankful for my podcast listeners.
How about that?
And I'm thankful that the show, God, I'm really loving the show today.
Okay, and it gets even picks up even more.
Can you believe it gets even better?
How does that happen?
I don't know.
Okay, so thanks for listening to the show on the podcast.
This is when I usually come to you and say, hey, could you help support the show?
But as a thank you today for my Thanksgiving, I'm going to give you a little behind the scenes.
Here's a little story I told during a break while we were taping today.
Man, yeah.
That's a great idea.
Thank God that guy was a puts, man.
I mixed it up with that guy.
I mixed it up with the...
And there's this article shows up of it, and they keep calling it not chemical pepper spray, but a chemical agent.
So I call up to say to ask the newspaper, is there a policy about the terms you use for pepper spray?
Why do you call it a chemical agent as opposed to a chemical weapon?
And so they put me through to this to the Metro editor, Mike Frankel.
And I go, I asked him that question.
Do you have a policy on?
He's like, what?
Huh?
And he's like, kind of like dismissing me, snickering.
What's your point?
My point is that words have meaning.
And why are you choosing to use one word as opposed to another?
I go, you know, just like with the torture enhanced interrogation techniques and how reporters became senographers instead of reporters.
And he was like, I'm on deadline.
And he hangs up.
I call back immediately.
He starts screaming at me.
And I just screamed right back.
And I go, if you can't fucking answer a straight question, Mike, that's not my fucking problem, buddy.
Okay, did you enjoy that?
I hope so.
That was fun for me.
Fun for me to share that story.
Fun for me to do it.
It's an exciting time at the Jimmy Door show.
Okay, thanks for supporting the show.
And if you haven't, it says swing by JimmyDoorComedy.com.
Click on donate, become a great person.
We're going to send you something nice in the mail.
And hey, I know times are tight, so if you can't make a donation, you can always go to iTunes and you leave a nice rating and then you leave a nice review.
And it really does help our standings and stuff like that.
So we appreciate you doing that.
Okay, now let's get back to today's show.
Okay, welcome back to the Jimmy Door Show.
I'm joined in studio from the Mental Illness Happy Hour podcast.
It's Paul Gilmartin, and next to him, former writer for The Daily Show and hilarious comedian at Steve Rosenfield.
What's coming up on the rest of the show?
Well, we're going to hear from our friend Andy Fell again.
He calls back in, or we call him again and bug him.
We're going to hear from Herman Kane on this half hour.
We've got a lot more stuff come up.
We're going to hear about all the descriptions of Occupy Wall Street and a lot lot more.
Plus, why child labor is good.
Yeah, it's good for the inner city.
That's coming up right now.
Here's Jim Hightower.
Here's some free advice for America's financial and political leaders who are eager to shut down the Occupy Wall Street protests.
If you want to woo the public, try to keep your riot-clad police from shooting an Iraqi war veteran in the face and brutally beating another with clubs, especially when the unprovoked assaults are being videoed, as recently happened in Oakland.
You're welcome.
The increasing presence of war veterans in the Occupy protests makes it difficult for officialdom to claim that the movement is nothing but aimless, shiftless kids who pose a threat to decent society.
Indeed, the real threat to decent society, by which the elite mean themselves and their plutocratic rule over our economy and politics, is their own disdainful treatment of America's worker day majority.
Like millions of knocked-down middle classers and held-down poor people, a tidal wave of soldiers who've served three, five, seven, or more tours in hellish war zones have been coming home to a jobless, low-wage, relentlessly grim economy.
The unemployment rate for vets is 12%, a third higher than the national rate.
For young vets, it's 20%, more than double the national figure.
And some 50,000 more soldiers are to return from the Mideast wars by year's end.
So, what's the plan?
After World War II, a more enlightened establishment created the GI Bill to absorb that surge of returning soldiers.
But our leaders today have nothing approaching that enlightenment, nor even a plan to have a plan.
This is Jim Hightower saying, the penthouse swells can unleash their police to break up protests, but that only fuels the fury.
Now, they're cracking down on veterans, people who know how to use guns.
It's time to deal with the growing crisis of joblessness and inequality in America.
For more information, contact veteransforcommons.org.
What do the corporate powers from Wall Street to Walmart have in common?
They hate the Hightower Lowdown.
You can see why at www.hightowerlowdown.org.
Okay, that was Jim Hightower, and you can hear Jim Hightower most every week here on the Jimmy Door show.
And, you know, we just very quickly, let's get back to the Chancellor.
We're going to talk about the UC Davis thing, but the chancellor, she gave her apology, right?
And now you were saying, Paul, that you...
It appeared sincere.
And my point was that it did appear sincere, right?
She was doing her best to be sincere, but I was using, to an untrained eye, it looks sincere.
But I think that if she was that sincere, wouldn't she have just resigned anyway?
Because the whole faculty and all the students want her to.
She was sincere about wanting to keep her goddamn job.
Yeah, it seemed like she was right?
Yeah, so I didn't know that all of the faculty wanted her to resign.
I saw the last I saw, there was one faculty member that had wanted her to resign.
I didn't know the rest had jumped on board.
You know what?
I'm going to double check that fact and get back.
Okay.
Thanks.
I would hate to be wrong about that.
Okay.
Okay, well, guess what?
We did do a little fact check.
And what I got from CBS News website from San Francisco is, quote, many faculty members say it's time for Katahi to step down.
The UC Davis Faculty Association's Board called for her resignation, saying in a letter there had been a gross failure of leadership.
So not often do you get to have a fact check like that so quickly, but there you go.
We have the UC Davis Faculty Associations Board is who called for her resignation, plus the physics department and the English department.
Okay, so not quite every faculty member, I guess, but not quite one.
All right, so now back to the show.
But I think she's still, do you think she should resign?
Not necessarily, but it's a complicated matter because you don't know whether she was just kind of caught off guard and didn't know that it could have gotten to that point or whether she was willing for it to go to that point.
So my question, I called the chancellor's office and I couldn't get anybody to allow me to record them.
So that's no fun.
But the question I had that I wanted to have answered was, did the chancellor, because of the part of this protest, was about the police brutality that has been happening around the country, especially at UC Berkeley.
So they were protesting that.
And I wanted to ask the chancellor, did she not consider the possibility of police brutality during this encounter, right?
When you order riot police in riot gear onto your street on your onto your campus, did she not consider the potential for police brutality?
Now, if she did, and then she sent them in anyway, she should resign.
And if she didn't consider it, she's incompetent and she should resign.
What is the reason she sent the riot police in?
What reason did she give?
She said that they were sent in to break up.
There were tents.
People had put up tents on an Occupy thing.
And so that's why she sent them in to break up those tents.
Well, they did.
They broke up those tents.
Those were all very peacefully done.
You know, the students were completely peaceful.
They never at any point put up any resistance, any violence at any point.
So they said, move your tents.
They moved their tents, you know, and the ones that didn't, there were like 10 tents left.
The police went and moved them.
Nobody hassled them.
And then when they were leaving, the students sat down on this in the quad.
They sat down.
What was there?
It looked like maybe 12 students sitting there, and they had to pepper spray them.
They were sitting on the sidewalk.
So I think she should resign.
I think that she should resign.
The police chief should resign.
That guy should be fired.
That guy who's pepper sprayed them, Lieutenant John Pike, Lieutenant John Pike, who I called.
I called him to got his voicemail.
It was full.
Shock.
Yeah.
So I think Andy Fell should resign.
I'm hoping.
He could not even answer your question.
He couldn't.
Can you imagine that?
I haven't read them.
I'm sending it to you.
I haven't read brochures or something.
I think Andy Fell should resign, but only the jobs he holds in Britain.
I'm with you.
All right.
You know what?
Andy Fell actually, I call him again a second time.
And I want to, and I really went right to the.
I think you're in love with Andy Fell.
It really went right to the heart of it.
He seems obsessed with him.
Let's go.
Come on.
Listen, I just want to ask you: what is your policy on using chemical weapons on peaceful protesters?
Can you help me?
Well, I mean, I think you're referring to the video that everyone's watching on the television and on the internet.
If you could keep looking at the video, it's very apparent that the police officers wanted to walk in a particular direction.
Yes, but they were unable to because there were human beings blocking the path that they were trying to walk down.
Yeah, there were some college students sitting on the sidewalk.
Right.
And as you know, as anyone knows, if you're trying to walk in a particular direction and you're blocked by any kind of object, you spray it with some sort of problem.
I mean, police officers are no different.
I mean, if you were walking down a sidewalk and you were trying to get somewhere and there were one or two or three students standing in your way, you would spray them with the chemical weapons.
Correct?
No, that's not.
That's not what I would do, Andy.
No, not at all.
No, no, it's not.
No.
That's not.
Are you literally telling me that's not what you would do?
That's what I told you.
If there were people blocking your way, you would not spray them with a chemical weapon.
No, but it's.
Well, how would you deal with the people who are standing in your way?
You want to walk in a straight line, right?
No, you've decided that.
But there are people there in the way.
You have no recourse but to spray them with chemical weapons.
I mean, this is ridiculous that you would even imply any other options.
Well, is that the policy, though, for the police to just go ahead and do that if someone's just non-violently protesting, even though they're breaking the law?
Well, I certainly would have no idea if that's the policy or not.
I think it's a basic human.
Like I said, that's how all of us would deal with that situation belonging to its official policy.
Andy, that sounds a little crazy.
I mean, but you can't tell me what the policy is for the – well, what is the policy for – Well, this is the information office, isn't it?
Well, yes, of course.
Well, why can't you give me that information?
Why would we have that?
What are you talking about?
Well, where would I get that then?
I don't know.
I don't have information.
Well, why do they call your office the information office then, Andy?
How would I know?
Why do you think I would know why they called it the information office?
This is the most impossible question I've ever heard.
This office was named years before I came here.
But there's got to be a way I can find out.
I would assume there's all of the information that you're looking for is on the website.
And what's the website address?
I have no idea.
You can't even tell me what the website address is.
Well, I certainly don't know what the website is.
How would God say what I don't ask?
You mean you haven't even read your own website for the university?
You haven't read it?
Of course, I haven't read the website.
What?
Are you kidding me?
Why in God's name would I read that?
That's an impossible question.
Well, you can't answer any questions.
I am answering.
I've answered every single question that you've asked.
You haven't answered anything.
I mean, I have been nothing but forthright and honest with you.
Honestly, you've been the opposite.
Excuse me.
Have it.
You can't go in there.
Why not, man?
We're a university student.
I don't know why you can't go in there.
I just know that you're not allowed to.
I just know that you're not allowed to.
Okay, so you're listening to the Jimmy Doer show.
And if you missed any part of today's show, you can always get a podcast of the show for free at iTunes or at my website, JimmyDoorComedy.com.
And right now, we're going to talk in the shift gears.
So let's, here's Senator John Kyle.
Here's what he had to say about the people from Occupy Wall Street.
A lot of these folks who somehow think money grows on trees and they're entitled to it and they don't understand how wealth is produced in this country.
Yeah, see, the Occupy Wall Street types don't know how to produce wealth.
They think you work hard, save, and then you have a good life.
These people are idiots living in a fantasy land known as the past.
They don't know you manipulate the market and then leverage what you've bet against while having your investors bet on the thing that you know is going to go down.
Yes.
Yes.
What you're saying, Paul, is maybe a little bit of fraud, is what you're saying.
What I'm saying, Jimmy, is let the bankers, they've got an Ivy League degree, let them bundle their derivatives in peace.
I'm with you.
The economy doesn't run on B.O., Jimmy.
What does the economy run on?
Oil and the exploited labor of poor people.
Oh, there you go.
Okay, that's right from Richard Martin.
Okay, now here's Sean.
Sean Hannity had a description.
Oh, I can't wait to hear this one.
Here's Sean Hannity's description of the Wall Street protesters.
What have we seen here?
Violence, rape, arson, destruction of property, sex in public, masturbation in public, naked people, drugs, drug paraphernalia, you know, anti-Americanism, anti-Semitism, anti-capitalism.
You know, you know, Sean really makes it sound more fun than it really is.
He really, I mean, is that his list of complaints about Occupy Wall Street or just a list of stuff Sean jerked off to?
Is there anything more disgusting than a bunch of dirty, degenerates making a completely valid point?
If there is, I can't think of anything.
It sounds like Burning Man to me.
Yeah.
It acts like he's describing Burning Man.
Yeah, he is.
Seeing that the police beat the Occupy Wall Street protesters has got to give the far right such a hard on because here are people protesting for rights for working people being beaten by members of a union.
It's like they don't even have to lift a finger.
It's eating itself.
It's like an MC Escher sketch, you know?
Wow, that's a very, that was a way to lay it down, Paul.
That was nice.
I didn't even think of it like that.
You're right.
And they're getting, here there are workers protesting, getting beaten by union workers.
Right.
Well, just, I just have a hard time, you know, like my dad was a cop.
My grandfather was a cop.
My older brother who was a cop.
I don't understand how the cops, if people go, you know, it's just a few, they always like to go, it's just a few cops.
You know, most of the cops are good.
Really?
Are all the cops in New York on sick leave, all the good ones?
Because I don't see any of the good cops at UC Davis on sick leave, are all the good cops in Oakland and Seattle, are they all on sick leave?
How about when that cop in New York was pepper spraying those women?
All the other good cops just stood there, did nothing because they didn't want to lose their job.
And again, that's not a valid reason.
That's not a valid reason for using violence against peaceful protesters.
I might lose my job.
Or might lose the house.
I have to see the house first before I can say where they are.
Because if it's a really nice house, good clean lines, post-in-beam ceiling, I got to say, go ahead and spray away.
Do you share?
Bilk-in-kitchen?
Do you understand?
Shake it up before you spray it.
Breakfast Nook.
Do you share my, you know what I'm trying to say, Steve, about the cops?
Because it's coast to coast.
And it's like, wait a minute.
You mean, I thought the cops are supposed to be the good guys, and they're not.
They're the bad guys.
Maybe they all use the bad cops for the beatings.
Maybe they specifically, we're going to need some bad cops for this.
Good cops, you know, stand down.
We're going to get some bad cops here to spray some ladies.
One thing I think everybody involved in this has is a deep-rooted fear.
And just each person's fear is about a different thing.
The cops are afraid they're going to lose their jobs.
You know, the mayor is afraid he's going to lose control of the city.
The protesters are afraid that this is never going to end, that they're going to have no future.
And everybody's acting from that place of fear with no trust for each other.
And let me just show how easy it is to corrupt a cop.
They'll beat pregnant, they'll mace pregnant women, 84-year-old ladies, college students.
They'll mace them all.
They'll beat them with batons over their heads just so they can hang on to their $70,000 a year job.
Now, imagine if you were a drug dealer or a mafioso guy who wanted to bribe one of those guys.
How easy would it be?
Right?
If you're willing to beat innocent people for $80,000, $70,000, $80,000 a year, wow, what else would you be willing to do for $70,000 or $80,000 a year?
You'd be willing to do a lot of ugly stuff, wouldn't you?
That's what I would think.
All right, let's get back to the clips.
So here's Newt Gingrown here.
Here's how Newt Gingrich, here's what he had to say about the Occupy Wall Street people, and it's really enlightened.
All of the Occupy movement starts with the premise that we all owe them everything.
They take over a public park they didn't pay for, to go nearby to use bathrooms they didn't pay for, to beg for food from places they don't want to pay for, to obstruct those who are going to work to pay the taxes to sustain the bathrooms and to sustain the park.
Now, that is a pretty good symptom of how much the left has collapsed as a moral system in this country and why you need to reassert something as simple as saying to them, go get a job right after you take a bath.
And it's a nice cheer at the end, too.
Was John Wayne also at the DS with him?
It's nice to see that for all his experience in Congress, Newt Gingrich has the same understanding of the economy as Herman Cain.
Isn't that nice?
For him to say that to the people unable to find employment in a depression, you know, a Wall Street lobbyist and crackup like Newt Gingrich says, get a job.
Oh, boy, Newt, that's a funny one, isn't it?
Seeing that your job was making sure that the people who ruined the economy and rigged the game so that they received taxpayer-funded welfare when they went bankrupt and everyone else lost their jobs, houses, and retirement.
Ha ha, hella funny, Newts.
Really?
Not quite as hilarious as the time you punked your wife by serving her divorce papers in front of your kids in a hospital room where she was recovering from cancer surgery, but still is pretty funny.
He is a witty man.
He is witty.
He never knows when to stop with the goofing and the shenanigans, right?
He is funny.
Yeah, and he just, you know, those people need to pick themselves up by their bootstraps, roll up their sleeves, and become lobbyists, just like Newt.
That's all it would take.
What else would you need?
People are looking for jobs.
They're protesting because they want jobs.
Correct.
And Newt Gingrich says, get a job.
Well, we were protesting for a job.
Won't you get a job?
I'm protesting.
And that's basically what I do on Facebook all day.
Really, the only thing left for him to say is, I know you are.
What am I?
No kidding.
Real kidding.
All right, let's, you know what?
I'm going to get to, oh, we got a little time here.
So let's get to our next clip here.
So you know they're in trouble when Bill O'Reilly, because this, because all this is, is the Occupy Wall Street people are actually making an impact.
They're having an effect on our consciousness.
They're having an effect on the political dialogue.
They're having an effect on the political process.
They're having an effect in our society.
And you can tell because if they weren't, they wouldn't care about them.
And here's when you know they're really making an effect because Bill O'Reilly says this about him.
So the Occupy Wall Street movement is dead.
Finished as a legitimate political force in this country.
And that's a good thing.
Okay, so that's it.
I guess it's all over.
And again, that is what is so valuable about Fox News is any news outlet can tell you what happened.
Fox is willing to tell you what they think is going to happen.
What it wants desperately to happen.
Always good journalism.
What they want to have happen.
Yeah.
Okay.
The police brutality, it is shocking, right?
Does it shock you?
Yeah, it doesn't surprise me.
It doesn't shock me.
It saddens me.
I'm surprised by it.
I did not expect it.
You thought it went out with the 60s and 70s?
I thought that once the cops saw video of themselves doing all that horrible stuff in the 60s, that that made an impression.
Or Rodney King.
Or Rodney.
Yeah, all that stuff.
I thought, no, they're more than ever, more than ever.
It's just, it's like, you know what I think it is?
Terrorism has made all, make police forces become like these paramilitary forces.
They're not no longer community policing.
They're like, they're all out looking for Al-Qaeda.
So they're all, somehow, they all have to have a helmet, a riot out gear on.
They all have to be ready because anybody can be a terrorist, you know?
That's what I think it is.
It's like, because the Department of Homeland Security actually says that peaceful protesting is to be considered a low level of terrorism.
Well, I can guarantee you in the next 10 years in this country, the most damage to be done to it will be by people that carry briefcases.
Yes, and it has been not acoustic guitars.
Yeah, it's the, yeah, I've said it for, you know, for a couple of months now.
It's the people with no money and no power.
They're the ones who've been screwing things up.
If there was just a way that the people with money and power could insulate themselves from the powerless.
But, you know, what they should be afraid of is that there's a growing number of people who have nothing to lose.
Yes.
And you can never win against people that have nothing to lose.
Never.
Right.
You don't want to get into a fight with a guy who's drunk, right?
Because he's going to keep coming.
Right.
Okay.
So, Herman Kane, we actually sat down.
We wanted to talk about his ridiculous comment about leader reader.
And so here's what he had to say.
Here we go.
Hey, Herman, how you doing, buddy?
Hey, Jim and Dora.
What you wearing?
Herman, cut it out.
I'm sorry.
What's your wife wearing?
Herman, what are you wearing?
Not a goddamn thing.
999.
You know me.
So, Herman, what are you doing?
We don't need reading.
We don't need reading.
We have a president now.
Yeah.
We didn't elect, it's the White House, not Reading Rainbow.
I didn't know we elected LeVar Burton to be president.
Ah, it's funny.
I know it is.
What did you say about you don't read?
We don't need a reader.
I said we need a leader, not a reader.
That's what I said.
The president we got reads too much.
I don't think that's the problem.
I hate reading.
I ain't going to read nothing.
If I get to be president, I ain't going to read shit.
Oh, Herman, the language.
I said early on, a three-page bill.
That's all we're going to have.
I none of these long bills.
Three pages.
That's it.
What?
Healthcare three-page bill.
What?
I ain't reading that either.
It sounds like you're championing ignorance, right?
Yeah, I want to win a nomination, don't I?
Aren't you afraid that makes you look, I don't know, a little anti-intellectual and maybe.
Make your ass up, anti-deleckadick-dicky, whatever you said.
Did you read it?
I don't like that word.
Why?
I don't know what it means.
I don't need to.
I'm a leader, not a reader.
Aren't you afraid you won't know something you need to know if you aren't reading?
Jimmy, I've got all sorts of experts, and a leader knows to use his experts.
But tell me what to do.
That's what a leader does.
I don't really.
He turns to someone who knows a bunch of stuff about some shit and says, tell me what to do.
And then he'll do it.
Herman.
That's what a leader does.
He's supposed to know stuff.
A leader doesn't know all the information his own self.
Herman, you got to know stuff.
But, you know, there's even classes you could take to learn how to learn stuff easier.
What do you think of that?
You out your goddamn mind.
What do you tell me?
I got to read up on how to learn.
I don't care.
Well, you should care.
999.
See what I did?
Yeah.
What did you do?
Just said something.
You just said something?
That's what a leader does.
But Herman, how will you know that the advice you're getting is even good advice if you don't know the stuff that you're because they are experts, Jimmy?
But how are you even going to know how to pick surrounding myself with a bunch of knuckleheads?
Well, how do you know that you're?
And I know how to use my experts.
What are you doing?
know how to use them and abuse them and choose them.
I mean, Herman, it just sounds like you're being ignorant.
Jimmy, if you're saying that not knowing things by virtue of not reading is ignorant, then paint me ignorant.
But I don't think that's what American people think ignorance is.
What?
Being confident, not knowing things.
That's what you think ignorance is?
Being confident, not knowing things?
No, that's being a leader.
What is ignorant?
I don't know.
Being ignorant is being not a Christian and being a Muslim.
Now, that is ignorance.
I don't understand Muslims.
Haven't they ever heard of Jesus Christ?
Herman.
He's famous.
Yeah.
What do we have to do to let these people know about Jesus?
I think they have their own.
We need to broadcast on Alger.
This is the zero.
Okay, I think you're getting off.
We're going to bring it back to the whole reader.
I'm sorry.
We're getting too far afield.
You're asking me about books.
Boom.
So what's your message to kids out there who look to the president as a role model?
Are you telling them to?
Put that book away.
That book ain't going to help you be a leader.
Herman, not everybody.
Put the book down and do something.
Come on.
I don't care what you're doing as long as it's not reading.
Okay, and that's today's show.
Did you enjoy it?
If you missed any part of today's show, you can always get a podcast of today's show for free.
How do you do that?
You get it at iTunes, or you can go to my website, JimmyDoorComedy.com, where you can listen to the episodes for free, download them for free.
And we always enjoy when you comment on the episodes.
Okay, that's JimmyDoorComedy.com.
And how do you spell my last name?
D-O-R-E.
Okay.
And a reminder, the next subversive comedy show is happening December 8th, right?
That's when the crew from the Jimmy Door show and some other top-name comics around Los Angeles get together.
So we'll see December 8th at Flappers Comedy Club in Burbank.
Today's show was written by Steve Rosenfield, Frank Conniff, and Steph Zamarano.
Today's show is produced by me.
But I want to give a special thanks to three people who helped this show by donating their skills and times to it.
First, our web guy, Doug Stewart, who does a great job.
Doug Stewart, Frank Pulaski from Dreamy Time Films, who takes some of the bits we do on the show and he puts video to them and then he uploads them and they're on my YouTube page.
You can see about my Facebook page.
They're hilarious.
Thanks to Frank Pulaski over at Dreamy Time Films.
And a big thanks to Sean James, who helps us out with all our Mac problems.
If you have a Mac problem, he can handle it for you.
MacHelp at SeanJames.com.
S-H-A-U-N James.com.
Mac Help at Sean James, and he'll take care of you.
All right.
That's all my thanks I have for this week.
And a big thanks for you for listening.
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