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July 22, 2011 - Jimmy Dore Show
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It's the Jimmy Door Show.
It's the show that makes Anderson Cooper say.
It's hard to talk in your T-Dagging.
So sit back or sit up or keep driving.
Now, here's a guy who sounds a lot like me.
It's Jimmy Dore.
Hi, everybody, and welcome to this week's show.
I'm joined in studio from cinematictitanic.com and Mystery Science Theater 3000.
It's Frank Connoff.
Hey, Frank.
Hey, Jimmy, how you doing?
Oh, I'm doing great.
You sound great.
Oh, do I?
Yeah, your haircut looks sharp.
Oh, thank you.
I cut it especially for radio.
He's wearing a hat.
He is wearing it, but I can still tell.
And sitting next to him, former writer for the Daily Show and hilarious comedian at Steve Rosenfield.
Hey, Steve, how are you?
Hey, Jimmy, how are you today?
I'm doing great.
And we're recording in Studio B in Pasadena today, and we're waiting on Paul Gil Martin from this, what's he from?
The Mental Illness Happy Hour Podcast, and TBS's Dinner in a Movie.
That's what he's from.
So we're going to talk about what's coming up on today's show.
Well, trying to avoid an economic calamity, the White House has endorsed the Gang of Six budget proposal, which throws out the Republican plan and replaces it with another Republican plan.
The big question is, will they be able to raise the debt ceiling?
We'll talk about it.
And Comic-Con is in San Diego this weekend.
And now all eyes are on negotiations in the San Diego City Council to see if they can raise the dork ceiling.
And, of course, the Rupert Murdoch phone hacking scandal.
We're going to take a look at it.
I wanted an objective reporting on this Murdoch scandal.
So, of course, I turn to Fox News.
They're completely objective about the story.
It's not like they have anything to lose.
We're going to check in with Steve Doocy and Bill O'Reilly, who are so far up Rupert Murdoch's ass, they were able to hack into his colon.
Here's a little taste of how Steve Doocy feels about the scandal.
We've got some serious problems in this country right now.
We are teetering on default.
And what do they do?
They talk about this.
That's right.
Imagine.
What can you believe they're talking about this?
Now back to the hard news of covering the threats to America from the Black Panthers, Acorn, and Shirley Shirai.
Okay.
And Michelle Bachman is a run-up against a right-wing rumor mill.
They're saying that she suffers from stress-induced migraines and an assertion that it would have interfered with her job as president.
Yes.
Michelle Bachman reacted to the cheap political smear by refuting it in a press conference and then crumbling to the ground in agony and lying in the dark room for 14 hours.
And Herman Kane, Republican president candidate, African-American, who never met a Muslim he didn't want to discriminate against, is also against Muslims building mosques in America.
They are using the separate, the church part of our First Amendment.
Yes, they're using the church part of our First Amendment.
He said using the jerk part of the First Amendment.
We're going to talk about Herman Kane's discrimination and the new normal in the Republican Party.
Okay, we got that coming up today.
Plus, Jim Hightower stops in.
And then we're going to have phone calls from, guess who?
Cover Chris Christie calls in.
Piers Morgan calls in.
And Bill O'Reilly calls in to tell us why he hasn't been covering the Rupert Murdoch scandal so much.
That's coming up today on the Jimmy Dore Show.
Time for another installment of Oh My God.
Okay, we're going to go to this week's Oh My God.
And, you know, it's kind of an easy one.
We go over to, this is Pastor John Benafiel.
And, you know, a lot of people are upset at the homosexuals.
Michelle Bachman, Michelle Bachman's husband, Market, thinks that they are barbarians who need to be disciplined, whipped, among other things.
And, you know, he doesn't, he's relieved when Michelle says, not tonight, honey, I have a headache.
Which apparently she says a lot.
Not this month, I have a headache.
So this is preacher, right-wing preacher John Benafield.
And the reason why I bring him up, because he's an official endorser of Rick Perry's The Response Prayer Rally.
Rick Perry, who's going to be running for president pretty soon.
I think if he gets in, he's going to win the Republican nomination.
Arguing that the statue, he argues that the Statue of Liberty is a demonic idol used for pagan worship.
Wow.
And in the same sermon, he claimed that, well, here it is.
Well, I'll just give it to you.
Here's what he has to say about homosexuals.
Ready?
Homosexuality was and is one of his big strongholds.
Now, we're not against homosexuals, but we are against homosexuality because the Bible very clearly God says, I hate it.
God said, I hate it.
God is a redneck.
That isn't how God, the way God said it when homosexuals brought up was hate it.
And then he snapped his finger or something.
That's what he did.
I hate it.
God is a bitch.
Okay, let's get back to more of Rick Perry's favorite preacher.
John Ben.
How do you say his name?
John Benafil.
I think that's how you say it.
Okay, back to some more of the gays ruining everything.
By the way, homosexuality is a great way to control the population.
And do you understand?
Oh, yeah, I'm serious about this.
And I've seen this in lots of places that the entity that we would call the Illuminati, which is really over above Freemasonry, has stated it as their goal to limit the world population to no more than 500 million.
Do you realize that means getting rid of all of us?
Because there's between six and seven billion people in the world today.
And to get from six to seven billion down to 500 million, you're going to have to kill a lot of people off.
Well, how are they going to be able to do that?
I mean, that's a lot of people.
He's saying there's going to be a homo cost.
We'll be right back.
Okay, wait.
I want to.
Oh, I don't even know if I should play the rest of this now.
Okay, wait, there's a little bit more.
So how are you going to get rid of it?
So how are you going to get rid of all these people?
Here we go, Ready.
What do you think the health care bill is?
Oh, yes, it's a death culture.
That's right.
And what do you think?
What about homosexuality?
That's a great way to limit the population.
Yeah.
There you go.
So it's all with the Illuminati, which are above the Freemasons, Freemasons.
I don't know if you know that.
So it's the Illuminati.
They want to get the Earth population down to 500 million.
By the way, not doing a good job of it.
How did he link the health care bill with the homosexual thing?
Okay, you know what?
Let's hear it.
You know what?
I kind of stopped and started.
Let's hear it one more time.
Okay.
Homosexuals.
But we are against homosexuality because the Bible very clearly, God says, I hate it.
Don't do it.
By the way, homosexuality is a great way to control the population.
And do you understand?
Oh, yeah, I'm serious about this.
And I've seen this in lots of places that the entity that we would call the Illuminati, which is really over above Freemasonry, has stated it as their goal to limit the world population to no more than 500 million.
Do you realize that means getting rid of all of us?
Because there's between six and seven billion people in the world today.
And to get from six to seven billion down to 500 million, you're going to have to kill a lot of people off.
What do you think the health care bill is?
There you go.
Oh, man.
He's all over the map, really.
Oh, yes.
It's a deaf culture.
Killing people.
And what do you think?
What about homosexuality?
That's a great way to limit the population.
Okay, so the gays are behind the health care bill.
You misunderstood it.
think he thought that they wanted a single gayer.
It's fun with puns, with TVs.
You like words, don't you?
You really do like words.
Yes, so that is Pastor John Benefield: Homosexuality, a plot by the Illuminati for Population Control.
Okay, so Paul Gil Martin is in studio with us now.
He just heard the John Benifel clip.
You know, Frank said, What do you say about it?
He's predicting.
He's predicting a homo cost.
I would just like to thank him for not surprising me with his dialect or tone of voice.
It's so surprising to hear gay bigotry come from somebody with that kind of an accent.
Yeah, it really is.
Yeah, okay.
So that's so that's a word.
That's what I wanted to know.
Paul got in on our oh my god today.
Were you happy you made it?
Wow.
Wow.
Oh my God.
Yes and no.
This has been oh my god.
Oh my God.
Okay, that was a fun.
That was a fun episode of Oh My God This Week.
It was fun.
Paul got to, I'm glad you got here in time to hear it.
Yeah.
Got the homo cost joke.
It's great.
And okay, so now what's what are we going to talk about?
Fox News is doing a great job of covering the Rupert Murdoch scandal.
And to analyze it, they got their two favorite hacks, Steve Doocy and a guy named Bob Dylan Schneider.
Let's go ahead to the let's hear how Fox and Friends covered the Rupert Murdoch.
Yeah, Bob Dylan Schneider, the head of the New York-based Dylan Schneider Group, and he used to run one of the biggest PR firms in the country.
Oh, he used to run one of the biggest PR firms in the country.
So you know this guy values truth.
Okay.
And here's where the right isn't just good at their message machine.
They're pioneering new areas of efficiency.
It used to be to spin something, you'd hire a PR guy, and then he would write up.
He'd think up some BS, and then you'd get a talking head to go on the television and say it.
Well, they've cut out the middleman.
Have him in-house.
Now they just bring the PR guy right on the show.
Just go ahead.
Here's the PR guy.
This is what he's supposed to be saying.
You heard his crap about Rupert Murdoch?
This is what we think.
And so here's what he has to say.
And if I'm not mistaken, Murdoch, who owns it, has apologized.
But for some reason, the public, the media, keeps going over this again.
It's a little bit too much.
Really?
Really?
A little too much.
Yes, yes.
He has apologized.
I'm glad he's pinpointed the problem that the media and the public are piling on.
That's what he said is happening.
Sure.
Yeah.
And now let me just say, thank God these well-paid professionals are here to lie to us to help clear it up for us because I wouldn't know what was happening unless I got some misinformation.
And at first, it seemed like the true victims of this case were the people who were hacked, like the child murder victim and family.
Yeah, or to the greater extent, the public who need an ethical and reliable media.
But no, just as I suspected, the real victim are the poor people over at News Corps.
Yeah.
I mean, why is it?
Why is everybody piling on Rupert Burdock?
He said he was sorry.
What more do you want from him?
Why are they expecting him to take responsibility for an empire that he created and owns?
Where does that come from?
Why wouldn't that?
It's just one man who owns the world.
Yes.
This is kind of like a classy version of the Leave Brittany alone video.
Right.
Okay, they have more to say.
Your issue is really hacking, and how are we as a public going to protect ourselves and protect our privacy and deal with it?
I would also say, by the way, Citigroup, Great Bank, Bank of America, Great Bank.
Are they getting the same kind of attention for hacking that took place less than a year ago that News Corp is getting today?
Right.
Yeah.
So once again, Fox News trying to confuse the people who turn to them to help clear up the issues.
Yes, they're trying to make hacking seem all the same.
You know, the hacking that happened at Bank of America.
First of all, it was a nice nod to their corporate overlords, right?
You say, Citicorp, Bank of America, great banks.
That's like when Oscar winners say, hey, I want to thank the studio.
That's kind of like that.
Also, there's a difference.
Those banks haven't been granted a license on the condition that they serve the public good, which media.
Yes.
Well, also, those banks weren't doing the hacking.
They were victims of the hacking.
He's saying the hacking itself is the problem.
So it's like saying, like, if someone got murdered, why are you talking about the murderer?
It's murder itself that we should be talking about.
Right.
And shouldn't it be the guns' fault?
Right.
Shouldn't the issue that's being brought up is why do we allow corporations to get big enough that they can excuse the fact that they didn't know what was going on?
Well, then let's stop the FCC from granting them the ability to keep buying up and conglomerating.
So you're saying that we should have some sensible and logical regulation over our media companies in America and that that would maybe help society as a whole.
Yes, if you acquiring this new business interest is going to make it more difficult for you to oversee day-to-day operations of it, then let's not let that happen because this is what happens.
You can't use it as an excuse.
And then I heard the parliament people talking about, you know, debating about it.
And someone was saying that Rupert Murdoch, you know, they were talking about how cozy the government was with Rupert Murdoch.
They were saying, well, he owns 75% of the media properties in England.
And that just should never be allowed to happen in the first place.
That's the same thing in America.
I remember when I lived in New York, he bought the New York Post, and then he bought the Village Voice, and then he like bended the, at the time, you couldn't own a TV station and a newspaper in the same city, but they deregulated and now you can own everything.
It doesn't.
And it's just, it shouldn't.
And then you use that.
You use those media properties that you own to print favorable articles about media deregulation.
So it's.
Well, luckily, they've never done that.
This is all true.
It's what I've gone, I've said on this show many times before.
What used to be the Fourth Estate was what kept government and the corporations honest by investigating them.
Well, the corporations got smart and they just went ahead.
Well, we already bought the government.
Now we just have to get those pricks who keep investigating the people we bought off.
So we'll just buy them.
And that's exactly what they're doing.
The Fourth Estate now basically are the publicists for the corporation.
That's the purpose or the government is to present the case of the corporations or the government to present their, not to report on what's going on, but to present the official line on what they want the public to perceive is going on.
There's a little bit more to this Steve Doocy clip with this PR guy.
Here we go.
Love it.
And one of the other things about the media piling on piling.
You know, you look at some sites, you would think that Martians had landed in New Jersey again.
Yeah, you know, he's right.
The same kind of people who are upset over the Murdoch scandal once believed Martians invaded New Jersey.
Gullible people.
Not like the hard-headed realist who watched Fox News.
Am I right?
Well, it's funny.
He brings up that, you know, he's bringing up the Orson Welles War of the Worlds broadcast.
And it's, you know, back in those days, something like that was a hoax and was depicted after the fact as a hoax.
Now the hoax is just always the main story.
Right.
Yes.
Okay.
There's a little bit more to this.
We've got some serious problems in this country right now.
We are teetering on default.
And what do they do?
They talk about this.
We've talked about the problem over the country.
As if we're dealing with tough problems.
The president's dealing with tough problems.
We have problems in the States.
And we're dealing with this issue over in London that took place more than a decade ago.
Sure, I don't quite understand it.
And Mr. Murdoch himself has said that he's going to cooperate.
He's going to show up the parliament next week.
And now, news this morning that Rebecca Brooks, who headed up that unit, is calling it quits.
All the right things have been done from a crisis point of view in terms of the world issue.
Yeah, all here.
It really should get put behind us.
Investigators, the courts should deal with us, and we should move on and deal with the important topics of the day.
By the way, is there any question that when this is portrayed in a movie that Tilda Swinton will portray Rebecca Brooks?
I don't know who that person.
And it's funny how they're like, you're supposed to accept that these people who are talking about the boss that pays their salary, that this is like a really bad thing.
And no disclosure.
No disclosure about the fact this is the guy that owns the company that we are.
But he ran one of the biggest PR firms in America.
But people sitting at home watching that program are going, well, he must be smart.
He ran a big company.
Well, news.
Not that, oh, by the way, he was head of the biggest BS firms in the BS world.
He's a lying liar, and that's what he does for a living.
So let's bring him on and see what he has to say about the scandal.
He's the guy behind the reason the public thinks Paris Hilton is snarky now.
Let's bring him here.
Right.
He's why Kids Smoke Joe Camel.
And if you just changed a few of the nouns and the verbs, and this interview would follow exactly the blueprint of a Jay Leno interviewing like a Ryan Gosling or a Ryan Reynolds.
It's like, though, the Green Lantern movie looks really intense.
Was it really intense, Ryan?
Was it?
Wasn't it?
It sure was, Jay.
So this phone hacking scandal really looks overblown.
Is it overblown, Jay?
It sure is, Jay.
That's kind of like what this is.
They just bring a guy in the parrot exactly.
So now you're bringing up the Jay Leno comedy hacking scandal.
Yes, I am.
But I have to say, my favorite part of the clip was when they're saying how Citigroup and Bank of America, their hacking story should be bigger news.
Do these guys realize that they're actually on a news station right now?
And if they wanted to do some in-depth reporting on those stories, they could go ahead and say.
We wish we had the power to report these, but we don't.
We're just a news reporting organization.
I didn't watch it, but I'm sure they did nothing about the Casey Anthony trial.
So I'm sure their priorities are spooked.
Before we get to Bill O'Reilly, how he covered this, I just want to remind people, if you missed any part of today's show, you can get a podcast of today's show for free at iTunes, or you can go to JimmyDoorComedy.com.
How's my last name spelled?
D-O-R-E.
JimmyDoorComedy.com.
And you can listen to the show there.
You can download it for free there.
You could comment on the shows.
We'll enjoy comments on the shows at the message boards.
And that's also, don't forget, get your free podcast of the show.
Now, let's go on.
Bill O'Reilly covered the Rupert Murdoch.
Now, he didn't talk about it for a whole week.
Right.
And then he decided to cover it just yesterday or the day before yesterday.
So now we record on Thursdays in Los Angeles.
And so this was from Tuesday.
He waited about a week and a half before he really talked about it on his show.
So he brings out a reporter from England.
And here's how he tries to make it like this scandal, it's all about this.
The elites have their panties in a bunch.
That's all.
Listen.
Do the folks over there, the folks, the regular people, do they care about this big press battle?
Okay, so do the folks give a case.
It's a press battle.
That's what it is.
It's a press battle.
It's not, it's not this.
It's not complete corruption by the police, the government, and his boss's company.
Yeah, you know what?
I know one group of regular folks do.
The family of the girl that was murdered whose phone messages were erased.
Yes.
I gave them false hope that their kid was alive.
Yeah, I think they might be affected by this.
The real people who nothing bad happened to.
What about that?
What about another thing?
Okay, so she actually goes ahead and tells him.
And you can tell Bill doesn't like it.
And here we go.
There are people who have been outraged by the hacking.
It started out years ago, as you know, with the phones of celebrities and royals.
And I think people thought that was somewhat amusing.
But when it came to hacking into the phones of murder victims and terrorist victims, there were people who were quite outraged by that and called in to newspaper, put pressure on people who were buying advertisements in the papers.
And so advertisers pulled out.
So it sounds like the folks were upset.
Well, wait, I had a hard time understanding her with that thick British accent.
So she's actually a news court reporter over there.
And so he brings her on and he thinks that she's just going to play ball.
And do the folks really care?
So she starts to go, you know, it turns out, yeah, and they actually have been pretty pissed off for a while.
In fact, they got advertising taken away.
And so she keeps going and Bill interrupts her.
Hang on.
And then also, Bill, there's the other aspect here, which is it's gone beyond media.
It's now touching the police.
It's touching government at the highest level.
It's going up and up.
So I think people are up.
Historically, the press in England has a relationship as they do in Washington with the power people.
But there was a.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's going up and up because historically the press over and they do here.
They have a relationship with the power people.
Anyway, what?
He just wanted to sort of stop talking.
He's saying the exact opposite of what she's saying.
She's saying that the investigation is revealing that there's corruption between the police, the government, and he's going, yeah, and the media.
Of course, it's going, but that's the way it always is.
That's the way it is here.
That's the way that's just the way he's trying to.
The story corruption isn't right.
It's not news.
No, he's trying to downplay and dismiss.
Everybody knows that that.
Oh, it's no big deal.
That's his technique.
That's his MO.
If there's something, he just acts like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, yeah, going up and up.
I mean, that's it's beauty.
So here, so then he's done with her because she won't give him anything.
He cuts her off quickly and goes to a hack from the Heritage Foundation from England.
And here's what they had to say.
Here in the United States, there isn't any intrusion of this story thus far on news corps properties.
None.
Yet you have the New York Times absolutely running wild with the story.
Front page, front page, front page, column, column, column, vicious stuff, vicious stuff.
Yeah, the New York Times being very vicious.
Way more vicious than hacking into the cell phone of a dead girl.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Or hacking into, or bribing police to get the codes to hack into the or hacking into politicians and influencing elections.
No, it's much, much.
It's not like the guy that did these things has a license in the United States.
Right.
And could affect us.
And there's actually a United States citizen, Rupert Murdoch and his.
And in order to have his broadcasting license here in America, you can't, he broke a law that says you can't break laws in someone else's country broadcasting.
If you do, you can't get a license here, right?
So that's a big deal.
So he's like, no, nobody here.
That never happened in America.
Well, it doesn't really matter if it happened here.
But here's where they go on.
And it's all ideological, is it not?
It's all ideological.
That's New York Times.
It's all about ideology.
You know, their ideology of not wanting people to do criminal acts during an investigation.
That's a liberal bias.
It's a liberal bias against people who exploit the families of murders.
Of murder.
It's the inherent mistrust of oligarchs, and that's a prejudice.
Yes, it is.
All right, here's what this guy says back to him.
Yeah, I think we are seeing Bill the beginnings of a witch hunt again.
Wow.
The W word.
The beginnings of a witch hunt.
Corporation here in the United States.
We now have the rumblings of several congressional committers threatening to hold hearings into allegations of phone hacking into the accounts of American citizens to say it's not a witch hunt when the witch is turning people into toads in front of your eyes.
First of all, I love how Congress saying they're going to have hearings on this is a witch hunt.
They're looking into it.
Oh, boy.
Lexing, you know, you want to have a hearing.
Is this some kind of a witch?
That's what you do.
Where was their outrage over Peter King's hearings?
You know, right, yeah.
Oh, witch hunt into the Muslims.
Right, sure.
There's a little bit more to this.
But that was done.
Let me just say, that was allegedly done by the News of the World British people, not any American people.
Yeah.
Yeah, correct me if I'm wrong, Doctor.
There's not one American employee of the News Corporation implicated in any of this.
Yep, that's absolutely right.
There's not a shred of evidence.
Well, Bill O'Reilly, while being correct, happens to be 100% wrong.
Les Hitton resigned as CEO of Dow Jones and the publisher of the Wall Street Journal.
He resigned over this scandal because he's so close to Rupert Murdoch and he's involved in this.
And also the idea that you can separate the fact that that's happening in England.
You know, when Rupert Murdoch's company is worldwide, it's not just he has this operation in England and then he has Frankie's stuff going on.
No, you're wrong.
Criminality does not possess the ability to cross the sea.
Yeah, that's it.
They cannot swim.
That's why Australia is so nice.
All those criminals, by the time they got there, they were nice old books.
They were worn out.
No, well, he's actually.
Well, Rupert Murdoch changed the history by being a criminal who left Australia.
It went the other way.
You know, a point that I would like to make is: even if Rupert Murdoch didn't know that the phone hacking was going on, what he is guilty of, and I think a lot of other CEOs are guilty of, is creating a corporate culture where it's understood that you will do whatever you need to do to get results.
Right.
Yes.
And that's what needs to be addressed at the very least.
Well, I say we just apply that same theory to our health care, education, the financial industry, the financial industry, because that's exactly what they've done.
And then they get too big to fail, and their excuse is, well, we didn't know.
Well, then don't let them get that big.
Okay, so I just want to very quickly, well, we'll come back.
Bill O'Reilly actually called in the other day.
Jimmy Dore.
It's O'Reilly.
I hear you want me to talk about this Murdoch so-called scandal on my program.
You ask me, this whole situation is much ado about nothing.
That's a Shakespeare play.
I've read all of them.
And quite frankly, there are much more important and bigger media stories to cover.
Have you heard the real big news in broadcasting today?
Buckle up.
Time Warner added KBVO to its lineup in Austin, Texas.
Now, the important thing to remember here is that subscribers with digital tuners won't need to do anything to view that station.
But the owners with an analog tuner will need a digital converter box to tune in.
That is an above-the-fold story, my friend.
Did you know about that?
Of course not.
You're only concerned with the politics of personal destruction.
And did you hear the other big media news today?
I apologize because the story's a little bigger than it was at first.
I guess I buried the lead.
But Charlie Sheen just signed a deal for a new situation, comedy.
His turbulent departure from two and a half men was the most widely covered news story of the year.
As well, it should have been.
And now he's back at work.
Just another example of Hollywood secular progressives rewarding bad behavior.
And that is the type of story that Americans care about.
Not cell phone glitches half a world away.
And if you have to blame someone for all this, blame CNN's prime time limey lackey Piers Morgan.
He used to work for Rupert Murdoch, but doesn't now.
So I say, let's put all this squarely on his droopy, pasty shoulders.
But if you absolutely need to blame Rupert Murdoch for this news of the world mess, and I can't see how you would, how about having a little sympathy, Jimmy Dore?
Will you?
England populated Australia with nothing but convicts for 100 years.
Should it surprise anyone that they would eventually all breed towards one supercriminal mastermind who would make the world shudder with his massive, all-powerful syndicate of evil?
It's simple genetics, Jimmy Dore.
It was about to happen.
It's going to happen.
And you lefties like that genetic sort of thing, don't you?
But either way, this is not a big news story.
Trust me, I'm a journalist.
Get your head straight to war.
Okay, that's Bill O'Reilly calling in, letting us know.
And this is the Jimmy Doer show on Pacifica.
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And I'll see everybody in St. Louis, July 27th through the 31st at the Westport Funnybone in St. Louis.
See you there.
And the next pop in politics is August 13th.
That's a Saturday.
Now, back to the show.
Okay, we're back on the show.
I'm joined in studio from Mystery Science Theater 3000 and CinematicTitanic.com.
It's TV's Frank Conniff.
And next to him from Daily Show, it's Steve Rosenfield.
And next to him from TBS's Dinner and a Movie and the Mental Illness Happy Hour podcast, it's Paul Gilmartin.
I'm Jimmy Doerr.
And what's coming up in the second half of today's show?
Well, we're going to talk about Herman Cain, who's against Muslims opening a mosque here.
You know, you would think Herman Cain wouldn't feel so at home amongst a mob of angry white people.
But he does.
We're going to talk about that.
Plus, we have a phone call from Governor Chris Christie and Piers Morgan that's coming up on this half of the show.
But right now, there's a commentary from Jim Hightower.
With a tsunami of economic pain swamping America's working families, our stalwart national leaders are rushing to provide aid and comfort.
Unfortunately, not to workers, but to CEOs, Wall Street speculators, and every pampered plutocrat with a Gucci-clad lobbyist.
At least President Obama recognizes that the workaday majority has been knocked down.
Our economy as a whole, he says, with what passes for keen insight in today's clueless Washington, just isn't producing nearly enough jobs.
Indeed, as one economic analyst put it, June's unemployment report is awful from start to finish.
So, congressional leaders and the president have been trying to cut a deal, not to launch the bold can-do jobs program that America urgently needs, but to slash spending on Medicare, Medicaid, Social Security, and other essential programs that most Americans count on.
Adding to this Kafka-esque disconnect from reality, Republican leaders are locking arms to prevent any cuts to the insane tax handouts now going to billionaire hedge fund speculators, big oil, and multinational corporations that are hiding massive profits in offshore tax havens.
While they cut the poor, no tax giveaway to the rich is so revolting that GOP lawmakers refuse to kiss it right on the lips.
Even the $300 million a year doled out in tax breaks for corporate jets or the subsidy that Uncle Sam gives to yacht owners.
Seriously, jets and yachts.
Yet, Senator John Kyle whined that Democrats, quote, want ordinary Americans to believe that they will not be affected by the president's tax increase proposals.
This is Jim Hightower saying: if anyone knows what planet Kyle lives on, please beam the news to him that ordinary Americans don't have corporate jets and yachts.
We can laugh, but clowns like Kyle are destroying our middle class to make America safe for plutocrats.
Okay, thanks, Jim Hightower.
And you can hear Jim's commentaries every week here on the Jimmy Doer show.
And I promise to make my voice go up and down like that when I talk.
Okay, Frank, we were talking that before the show got started, and I wanted to talk about it.
I have a theory, I'm not going to vote for Obama because of everything you've heard me say on the show, you know, he's doing things Republicans have only dreamed about doing, cutting Social Security, Medicare.
The reason why we have two parties is because each party is supposed to present their ideas.
But Barack Obama is such a nice guy, he feels that it's his duty to present the Republican ideas and validate them, endorse them, and give them gravitas in our discourse, which he shouldn't be doing that.
So my theory is if John McCain would have won the presidency, that there would be no way we would be cutting Medicare or Social Security right now because the Democratic Party would be so strong around those issues.
Right.
And so I say I'm voting against Barack Obama.
I'm going to vote for the Republican because that's the only way you can strengthen the Democratic positions.
If you have a Republican president and then the Democrats can become Democrats again, we need to get rid of Barack Obama because he's making Republican ideas seem legitimate and reasonable.
His desire to compromise is.
I don't think he's compromised.
I think he really feels that way.
I think he feels it's the only way he can govern is through consensus.
Really, I think so, too.
I think that he feels that he can't.
If he was more the way you wanted him to be, he would be standing up for principles, but nothing would be getting done.
Even though 80% of America is not a good person.
But the Congress doesn't represent 80% of America.
They represent Grover Norquist.
Right.
So I think he's just, he's a pragmatist and a realist, and he's feeling he's trying to get the best result that he can get under the circumstances.
It seems like he's always going to, always thinking to himself, I'm going to meet him halfway regardless of what position they're starting from.
Instead of saying, I'm only going to go this far.
Well, I said the problem with their, when Barack Obama, letting the Republicans frame the debate.
So now the debate is: oh, how much are we going to cut from Social Security?
Not whether or not should not set it up the debate should be, how much are we going to tax the millionaires and billionaires?
Instead of saying Barack Obama wants to tax them, 5%, the Republicans say 1%, and we'll meet in the middle.
He's saying, okay, you frame the debate.
We're going to cut Medicare and Medicaid.
Okay, so then we'll meet.
And nobody's meeting in the middle on cutting defense.
Nobody's meeting in the middle about getting rid of some of these workers.
Right, but how would he make that happen, though?
You know, that's his thinking.
I can't.
Because, you know, I think there's some people on the left who think, you know, they would rather him not have passed the health care that he passed and rather stand up for single payer.
Right.
But then there'd be no.
Nothing would have happened.
So Obama's.
He's trying to move the ball.
Yeah, he's trying to move the ball.
Exactly.
That's the argument.
I disagree with that argument.
You think it could have been moved if he had stuck to his position?
You think the votes would have been there?
Because he says the vote.
Yes.
Obama says the votes just weren't there.
Well, you know, it's funny because everybody's saying what he's doing now is political theater.
He's jockeying for his position.
He's doing, well, so he understands that you use political theater.
You use rhetoric.
You use your bully pulpit to change people's votes, to change people's minds, which is what he's trying to, quote unquote, appeal to the independents right now.
Well, the way, wouldn't it be appealing to the independents if you told them that, hey, the thing you want me to do, I'm going to do it.
And these guys are standing in our way.
But instead, He tries to do this BS where it's like, look how reasonable I am.
So he is trying to change people's perceptions.
He's just not trying to change them in the right way.
So instead of lighting a fire under someone's constituency who's against him, he's trying to put out a fire.
You know what I mean?
And he's trying to placate.
Am I making sense?
Well, part of your logic of like, I'm going to vote for a Republican next time is, you know, we have to make things worse in order for them to get better.
And I don't know if I can.
I think that's way worse if you vote for Republican.
Yeah, I don't know if I can.
Well, I'm saying things wouldn't be worse right now if we had John McCain.
How could they be worse?
Do you think they're going to be able to do that?
Well, if he had a Congress on his side, he could have gutted Medicaid and Medicare and Social Security by now.
I mean, I think that's something that Sarah Palin would be the vice president.
I think that is way more frightening.
And Geriatric is the guy that stays alive.
No, I appreciate all your opinions, and I'm glad you disagree with me, but I think the Democratic Party would be stronger.
It would make us realize our value.
It's just like what happened in Wisconsin.
It's like, yeah, it took that guy getting elected and trying to do all those horrible things that finally woke up the base and woke up people to re and those freaking union members who were policemen and firemen who got duped and voted for the first walker and then were shocked that the Republican governor was going to be a union buster.
Boy, you didn't see.
So it woke those people up.
And so now they realize that, oh, yes, they're against the unions.
We know who our enemy is.
And now they finally woke up.
And I think that's what America needs because we're dumb.
It does need a wake-up call.
Not that wake-up call.
And, you know, I think it's got to get worse.
But what's it going to take?
I think a bad Democrat is better than even a good Republican.
I think Jimmy might have a point.
That's what's got us to the point.
Go ahead.
I think they might need to see the result of Bush, you know.
Or Scott Walker.
You had eight years of him.
We've got plenty of results of what he's doing.
And we got Barack Obama elected.
We got a black guy with a Muslim name elected.
That could have never happened.
No, it could not have happened.
Right, but now you're saying it's like, you know, but the reason we got a black guy with a Muslim name elected is because he was a moderate, because he was in the fiery.
No, it's because he wasn't George Bush.
He appeared to be everything George Bush was.
Yes, because he ran as a liberal.
He didn't run as a moderate.
He didn't run on I'm going to cut Medicare and Social Security.
He didn't run on I'm going to ramp up.
I'm going to stick up for the working class people.
I'm going to stand up to corporations.
I'm not going to be the world's police.
And I'm going to put on a comfortable shoe and get on that picket line if someone's trying to come against your rights to collectively borrow all those things.
And I won't sign a bill unless it has a public option.
But I think in the reality of governing, like, I don't even think there is a Democratic Party.
I think there's like a conservative Republican Party and a moderate Republican Party.
And the Democratic Party.
And Obama and the Democrats in Congress, too, with a few exceptions, like Bernie Sanders, are mainly moderate Republican.
I mean, Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid gave, in terms of the war in Iraq, they gave Bush everything he wanted.
They went along with it.
They were so afraid of being unpatriotic.
Right.
There was no big pushback against what Bush, and they're partly responsible, as is the media, and the Democrats in Congress are partly responsible for the mess that we got in Iraq.
So I'm saying that it's almost, I don't even know if I can go forward with the assumption that there is even a Democratic Party.
I wish there was, and I think Obama is governing with the reality of the Republican Party and the moderate Republican Party.
So that's why I say we vote Republican.
So maybe it galvanizes people around issues and we might get some real leaders.
Who knows?
The Democratic Party is as dangerously beholden to corporations as the Republican Party.
They just pretend that they're not.
And then when the issue comes up, you see them cave in.
Right, which is why we have a plutocracy.
And that's why he couldn't get the health care.
You know, he couldn't get the more progressive health care because he didn't have the Democratic support for it.
That's not why.
That's part of it.
You're right.
But he didn't try to move.
He tried to move Dennis Kucinich's vote.
He didn't try to move Ben Nelson's vote.
So Barack Obama realizes that if I don't have the votes, I can move him some way.
But he just didn't want to move him in the right way.
He tried to move Dennis Kucinich.
He didn't try to move Ben Nelson.
I mean, he did go to Dennis Kucinich's district and give speeches to his people saying Dennis Kucinich needs to get on board with his health care bill instead of going to Nebraska and saying, we need a public option.
And so that's so when people make that argument that he doesn't have the votes and he's only doing what he can do, that's not true.
You know, leaders move votes.
Right, but that's in theory, you know, because I think part of your argument is if he had just been more articulate and made some better speeches, he could have moved people who in their district, who were in conservative districts.
He could have moved the conservatives more liberal.
And I think he thought that that wasn't possible.
And I think he might have been right.
Okay.
Again, let me, you know, I forgot to play this in the last half hour.
I just want to place about Rupert Murdoch.
They did a story on ABC News about his wife, his wife.
So here we go.
Just a little bit about her.
Now 42.
Wendy Murdoch has been married to the 80-year-old media baron for 12 years.
So she's 42.
So she married him when she was 30, and he was 70.
So that's only 40 years.
That's not a big, and I'm sure she loved him.
Okay, here we go.
Since meeting him as a young executive for one of his TV operations in Hong Kong, the union was controversial at first.
Rupert Murdoch's now 102-year-old mother once called her new daughter-in-law a designing woman, especially after she challenged her husband's adult children, fighting for their two young daughters to get a stake in the company.
Wow, so she came in and she stirred it up in his family right away saying these two, so they're fighting against his older.
Well, this also brought up one of the most amazing things about this whole story that I didn't know that Rupert Murdoch has a mother who's still alive.
Who's still alive?
102 years old.
So that's why people go, why does he care?
He's 80.
He doesn't think he's going to die anytime soon.
He's got a lot of time left.
He's got a whole nother generation to go.
Right.
So listen to this.
And there is her history.
Coming to the U.S. on a student visa, then marrying her first husband, a man who with his then wife had sponsored her.
Wow.
I didn't follow that at all.
So she pulls a Sun Yee, right?
So what happens is, to get American citizenship in America, this couple sponsors her.
And she ends up, so her like an adopt, well, here, it'll be explained.
As first reported in the Wall Street Journal, what ended up happening is that Wendy, who was a teenager at the time, had an affair with the father, her sort of adopted father, and the two of them ended up getting married for long enough for her to get a green card.
And then she was done with him.
So this couple, this nice lady, brings, sponsors her, brings her over to America.
She ends up screwing her adoptive dad, the mother of the husband of the mother who brings her over, ends up having an affair with him, marries him, goes the full Sun Yee, marries him, and then as soon as she gets the green card, Ams Grace, she's done with that.
She had a plan.
Yeah, so she breaks up the family that brings her over, breaks it up, right, with a sexual affair, and then goes after Rupert Murdoch when she's 30, and then pits Rupert Murdoch's new kids against his older kids.
You know, the only thing I can say about this is ick, but it kind of makes me believe in romance again.
You know, I mean, he's an awful person, she's a really awful person, and yet in this big, crazy world of ours, they found each other, they find each other, right?
But when she attacked the person who threw the pie at him, he was really Rupert was really worried because he hates it when his trophies get messed up.
Yes, yes.
It is really like, it's like something out of a disgusting children's storybook.
It's like something you'd read in News of the World.
Not anymore.
There was the mean old king and a lovely little girl.
And then there was a dark witch that killed a little girl and got to marry the king.
That's the end.
That would be the story.
I wonder.
I wonder if in the middle of their romantic time with each other, like it just comes out of her.
She's just out of the blue says, just die.
Just die.
And then she goes back to normal.
So here's Andrea Mitchell with the conclusion to that report on Rupert Murdoch's wife.
Those who know Wendy Murdoch say that she is unstoppable.
That whatever happens to her husband, she and her children will have a secure future.
You think, first of all, we were all worried about the future of his wife and their children.
Well, also, Andrea Mitchell's married to Alan Greenspan, so she's the only woman in the world who looks at this woman and goes, man, I wish I had a hot husband like that.
Okay, so the Republican.
Let me just remind people that if you miss any part of today's show, that it's available as a podcast for free at iTones, iTones, or iTunes.
I like a new thing.
The kids are out with, and they all wear sweaters over at the iTones.
And the local group.
You know, go to jimmydoorcomedy.com.
How do I spell my last name, fellas?
Do you worry?
That's right.
Extra E is for extra P. I don't know what the hell that means.
But you can listen to the show there.
You can download it for free there.
You can subscribe there.
And you can comment on the episodes there, too.
Okay, so we're moving on.
This show is not slowing down for one second today.
As much as we've tried.
As much as we've tried with our Dust Bowl references.
I'm here from Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Cinematic Titanic.com, Frank Connor from The Daily Show.
It's Steve Rosenfield.
And from TBS's Dinner in a Movie, it's Paul Gilmartin.
I'm Jimmy Dore.
And right now, you know, the first Republican establishment smears have started to come after Michelle Bachman.
And here's how Brian Williams reported it.
Website called The Daily Caller cited unnamed sources described as former aides saying Bachman suffers from stress-induced migraines that have sent her to the hospital in the past.
Other aides who've been traveling with Bachman dismiss the story as an exaggeration and a political attack.
And we at NBC News didn't bother to do any investigating of our own to try to confirm this, but we thought it was our job to pass along rumor.
I'm guessing that intense migraines are brought about by complex issues.
Oh, but like, what would you say?
Like maybe one stuffing down their own sexuality or the sexuality of their husbands.
Well, assuming that he's out busy trying to cure barbarians of their barbarians.
They need to be disciplined.
That's right.
Whipped.
So it's just, that's the NBC nightly hearsay edition of the news, which was nice.
And so here, Michelle Bachman actually did a press conference where she.
But I'd like to be abundantly clear.
My ability to function effectively will not affect my ability to serve.
How ironic that she messes up saying that this have no effect on my effect.
Well, her head is killing her.
She can't get answered.
Well, I've never had migraines, but they incapacitate you, right?
Like you can't function.
You can't do anything.
That would be the only time I'd be a supporter of hers.
Brain damage.
Okay, let's listen to her whole thing.
You know, first of all, she says she takes medication for it, which finally, you know, answers that glazed look she's had.
Right, right.
I'd like to get some of that stuff.
And the headaches actually make you make you hallucinate things, which explains why she thinks the founding fathers ended slavery.
Right, here we go.
But I'd like to be abundantly clear.
My ability to function effectively will not affect my ability to serve as commander-in-chief.
No, no, no.
What will affect it is your crackbite ideas, your penchant for publicly misquoting history, fear-mongering, repeatedly making things up and saying them on television, your deplorable anti-gay rhetoric while being married to the biggest flamer in history, and your overall dim-wittedness and penchants for being batshit crazy will make you unfit to be president.
Okay.
And then the headaches.
And then in that order.
And by the way, biggest flamer in history, you got that from Rip Taylor said that.
I mean, that's how.
Website called.
Okay, so that's what she had to say.
It was the scariest thing was just hearing her refer to herself as commander-in-chief.
If she was actually our commander-in-chief, her migraines would be the least of our problems.
Yes, we'd all have a headache.
I would have a headache.
If she were elected president, would she and her husband be lowered like Peter Allen on a moon down to a piano?
Okay, you know, Piers Morgan actually was implicated in Parliament that when he was the editor of News of the World, News of the World, right?
And so he was actually and he wrote something in his book about phone hacking, and they called him out on it.
So he's upset about it.
And Pierce Morgan actually called into my show or he left me a voicemail, and this is what he had to say about it.
Hello, Jimmy Door.
This is Piers Morgan.
I assume you know who I am.
In fact, I'd find it rather odd if you didn't, quite frankly.
I'm not a famous internationally.
America's got talent.
Similar.
I'm the not American who judges it.
Steals Morgan tonight.
I know that program.
It was named after me, as a matter of fact.
Well, people are trying to smear me saying that I had something to do with a phone hacking scandal, which is complete nonsense.
Even though I wrote about doing it in a book and gave a slight tutorial on how to do it exactly.
Well, you can't smuggle this dapper public school tweety so easily, old chap.
Sure, I wrote about it.
And when I was the editor of News of the World, we wrote about lots of things.
That didn't make them true.
I mean, honestly, I'm in the business of legitimate fact-finding journalism.
I'm so up to my ascot with preparing for my upcoming interviews this week with Lady Gaga, Octomom, The Cast of Glee, Victoria Jackson, and Dubai's number one Piers Vedora impersonator, Zia Padora, that I simply haven't the time to concern myself with all this phone hacking nonsense.
And honestly, voicemails are silly, ethereal, inconsequential things anyway.
After all, this is a voicemail.
I said I was Pierce Morgan, but with this voice, I could easily be David Cameron.
Or Morrissey.
I'm so lonely.
You don't know.
Just don't concern yourself with these things, Jimmy.
Trust in our paternal Britannic wisdom.
Do give me a call when you get this message.
I'll know when you listen to it.
Don't worry about how.
Okay, that was Paris Morgan letting us know how he feels about being implicated in the scandal.
And okay, but right now we're up against the clock.
And I wanted to.
So Chris Christie has been wind and dying again.
It was the owner of Home Depot who took him out for food.
Took him out for food to try to convince him.
The thing I like about him is that he's not going to run, but he'll take a dinner from someone trying to convince him at any moment, right?
It's like, if you want to buy me a dinner, I'll be there, but I still have this or lunch.
Yeah.
But I still ain't going to run.
So it's funny he left me a voicemail talking about that.
Jimmy Door.
This is Governor Chris Christie of New Jersey.
Let me repeat myself in case you're hard of hearing.
Governor Chris Christie.
I'm not running for the president.
Everybody's telling me, run for president, run for president.
I run up for the fucking president.
Leave it alone.
You're all starting to get on my nerves over here.
And Paula keeps writing about how I should run for president.
She can run for my balls.
Who in their right mind would want to move from Breton, New Jersey to Washington, D.C. Forget about it.
I got a pool with a hot tub and a fish tank headboard here.
Go fuck yourself.
As you may have heard, I was recently courted by significant Republican donors, specifically Mr. Ken Langone, the founder of Home Depot.
We talked about a number of issues, including how much it would cost for me to build a wood-frame slaughterhouse for pigs in my backyard.
But at the end of the day, I did not relent.
I stood my ground, even after 24 hours of being whined and dined in Manhattan.
I gotta admit, the ordeal tested my resolve.
Pasta Fazoo.
Chicken Marsal.
Ball of Malbek.
Still not running.
Foie Gras.
Will Bomerjano.
Sambuka.
Still not running.
Keep it coming.
Canoli.
Kenado.
Black Forest Cake.
Still not running for retired.
Viagra.
Cocaine.
Scars Gentleman Club.
I love Carmelo.
Anyway, Jimmy Door, I tried to tell you I don't make these decisions lightly.
I consult with my wife and children.
And then I solemnly consult with the heads of the five families.
Bob Evans, Marie Callender, P.F. Chang, Ronald McDonald, and Cheesecake Factory.
Well, that's enough fat jokes for one day.
Okay, Governor Chris Christie calling in to let us know how he feels.
Another great impression by Mike McRae.
Thanks to everybody who left us a good review over at iTunes.
It really helps, and we appreciate you taking time to do that.
I want to thank everybody else who helped support this show over at JimmyDoorComedy.com.
We could not do this without your help and support.
And I hope you enjoy the thank you CDs and DVDs we send you.
And thanks for stopping by, JimmyDoorComedy.com.
And if you're in St. Louis, in the St. Louis area, I will be at the Westport Funny Phone next week, July 27 through 31st.
See you there.
And the next live Poppin' Politics video and sketch comedy extravaganza is Saturday, August 13th.
That's Saturday, August 13th at Meltdown Comics, 7522 Sunset Boulevard in Los Angeles.
Hope to see you there.
All the links to all the shows are available at JimmyDoorComedy.com.
And this Monday, our good friend, Frank Conniff, TV's Frank, will be doing his cartoon dump, his Cartoon Dump Show.
That's right, the Cartoon Dump Show Monday, July 25th at the Steve Allen Theater in Los Angeles.
And Paul Gilmartin will be doing his Republican character and a live taping of the Adam Corolla podcast and Irvine Improv this Sunday, the 24th.
It's a matinee show.
Okay, today's show is written by Frank Conniff, Robert Yasimura, Steve Rosenfield, Steph Zamorano, and Mike McRae.
And thanks to my guests, Frank Conniff, Paul Gilmartin, and Steve Rosenfield.
I appreciate them sitting in and being funny.
And thanks to you for listening.
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