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Feb. 27, 2011 - Jimmy Dore Show
57:23
20110227_The_Jimmy_Dore_Show_-_February_24_2011
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It's the Jimmy Dore show.
The show for people that are tell men's maybe on tearing down our nation.
It's the show that makes Anderson Cooper say.
It's hard to talk to T. So sit back or sit up or keep driving because it's the Jimmy Dore show.
And now, here's a guy who sounds a lot like me.
It's Jimmy Dore.
Hi, everybody.
Welcome to the show.
I am joined in studio as always by Robert Yasamura from TeamYasamura.com and Paul Gilmartin from Dinner in a Movie on TBS and ask a Republican.com.
Remember, he's not a real Republican.
And by Ben Zelavansky, comedian writer, extraordinary.
You can catch him at Ben and Alex.tv.
What is happening this week on the Jimmy Dore show?
Well, Christine O'Donnell has declined an invitation to join the cast of Dancing with the Stars.
She says she's busy and she has to finish a book.
I'm guessing reading one.
We're going to talk about that.
Scott Walker, the nicest Christian governor to ever bust a union, took a prank call in which he showed his true nature.
Yes, we're going to play the call in which Governor Scott Walker of Wisconsin shows us who he really is.
A huge cocor who planned to trick Democrats into meeting with him and who actually contemplated using violence to end the teachers' protests.
That's good Christian governor Scott Walker coming up.
And we go to another favorite governor in New Jersey.
Chris Christie's got a problem with the workers.
He says there's two classes of Americans.
There can no longer be two classes of citizens.
One that receives rich health and pension benefits and all the rest who are left to pay for them.
That's right.
And Governor Christie is going to make it so there's no class with rich pension benefits.
Okay, thank you very much.
Governor Christie, we're going to talk about him.
We're going to talk about that.
We're going to talk about Wisconsin.
But before we get to any of that, let's talk about John Boehner.
You know, famously, he said this two weeks ago.
Over the last two years since President Obama has taken office, the federal government has added 200,000 new federal jobs.
And if some of those jobs are lost in this, so be it.
We're broke.
It's time for us to get serious about how we're spending the nation's money.
That's right.
So, and he was elected to create jobs.
He immediately started cutting jobs.
And what he didn't expect was that some of the federal spending cuts would be for pork projects in his own district.
That's right.
We finally got rid of the F-136's funding for the extra engine.
Yes, that's right.
They would make an F-136.
And every time they made one, they would make an extra engine, which nobody wanted.
The Pentagon didn't want.
The Secretary of Defense didn't want.
The country didn't want.
But you know who wanted it?
John Boehner wanted it because it was made in his district.
And he's the speaker, and the speaker gets what he wants, except he didn't get it this time.
That's right, because there was a band of tea partiers and liberal Democrats got together to cut the F-136's extra engine.
That's right.
Bush tried to kill it, couldn't.
Defense Secretary Gate tried to cut it, tried to kill it, couldn't.
It took Obama, Tea Partiers, and a bunch of liberal Democrats over Boehner's objection.
Some of those jobs are lost in this, so be it.
Oh, so be it.
I'm sorry, John Boehner.
And you know what?
John called me up, and he left me a phone message.
I thought I should play it.
Jimmy Dore, this is John Boehner, the 61st Speaker of the House of the United States House of Representatives.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I just get a little emotional whenever I think about how far I've come in life.
Anyways, I was hoping I could get some time on your show to talk about this budget crisis we're facing.
I've been getting a lot of flack about my support for the joint strike fighter engine development in my home state of Ohio.
I don't need flack.
The American people don't need flack.
Listen, this recovery isn't about flack.
It's about jobs.
And this jet engine would create jobs.
Now, the Department of Defense claims this product isn't needed and is, quote, obsolete technology.
I'm sorry, but I don't remember when it was decided that the federal government is in charge of what sort of fighter jets the American people get to manufacture.
Look, I got to call you back.
In a few minutes, I've got a meeting with the Tea Party caucus here in my office.
Just between you and me, I'm not really looking forward to this.
Last time, my secretary made the mistake of putting out shrimp cocktail for these savages.
Within 15 minutes, it looked like the Manson gang had been through here.
I'll call you back.
Okay, John Boehner calling in, leaving me some.
He doesn't seem to be too shaken up about losing the F-136 project.
We'll see.
We'll check back in with this.
Is that the right call designation?
That doesn't sound right to me.
What do you mean?
F-136.
I think it's an F-F-36 or an F-38.
It was actually an F-35, but then more specific, the F-136 engine.
Oh, okay.
I looked it up, Robert.
The F-35 is the Raptor, which got canceled last year.
Whoa, listen to Robert, huh?
Wow.
Because it's a $1 million thing.
If only this was interesting.
If only it was interesting.
What I'd need to know is, do I need a slothead screwdriver or a Phillips?
You need a slot head, but it's a very expensive slot head.
I'd never even heard of a slot head.
That sounds a regular standard screwdriver.
That's a flathead.
Flathead.
Flathead.
Slothead.
You blockhead.
That's Paul Gavarton, ladies and gentlemen.
You just heard like two moments of nerdiness like me with planes and you with tools.
You want to chime in with gardening anybody?
Paul, how do you do it?
Just got to read the paper.
15 minutes at magazines, Jimmy.
Okay, and now it's time for.
Time for another installment of Oh My God with Paul Gilmartin.
Okay, this week it comes from a trusted source for the Oh My God segment, Rush Limbaugh himself.
He was making, you know, Rush is a very fashionable guy.
We all know that.
Rush likes to.
Thai salesman.
Rush Limbaugh.
Thai salesman.
Sure.
Was he?
He sold ties?
Yes.
Really?
I did not know that.
You guys don't know a lot about fashion, do you?
No, we don't.
GQ subscribers here at the Jimmy Dore show.
And, you know, Rush is he knows how to buy a shirt that he doesn't have to keep constantly pulling off his stomach.
He knows how to do that.
But here he's making some comments, some fashion comments about Michelle Obama's wardrobe.
And, well, let's just enjoy it.
And dare I say this.
It doesn't look like Michelle Obama follows her own nutritionary dietary advice.
And then we hear that she's out eating ribs at 1,500 calories of serving with 141 grams of fat.
I'm trying to say that our first lady does not project the image of women that you might see on the cover of the sports illustrated swimsuit issue.
Oh my God.
Rush Limbaugh.
Fortunately, he does project the image of a pompous, overpaid guy crushing foot pounds against his pleated khakis.
He looks like the kind of guy who would pleasure himself to a sports illustrated swimsuit while eating a hoagie.
He looks like that kind of a guy.
I'm just glad that I was here to witness the very first time Rush Limbaugh ever looked up nutrition information for something.
I think I feel like that should have gotten a bigger laugh.
No, that's very funny.
Very funny.
There's more to this.
There's more to this.
I don't know if I can handle more.
Here it comes.
I mean, you couldn't.
If you wrote that down and put it in, like, if I'm the Simpsons or the family guy, they had a clip of Rush Limbaugh making fun of counting someone else's calories.
You would go, come on.
The writer's room would cut it.
That's a little bit of on the nose.
Yeah.
What is he also sitting in a cup of butter as he says it?
Okay.
There's more.
For suggesting that my comments are below the belt.
Well, take a look at some pictures.
Given where she wears her belts.
I mean, she wears them high up there around the bust line, hitting just about everything about her below the belt.
When you look at the fashion sense that she has.
Okay, that would be the end of the clip.
Wow.
We're not sitting here making remarks about Rush Limbaugh's bust line, are we?
No.
No, it's I. What's weird is I haven't been able to, I haven't noticed it ever since Rush.
He started wearing a slim tee, which comes with the double-padded bra.
And it really, and so Rush Limbaugh, you can't even see that if he's lactating, you don't know.
You can't tell anymore.
And, you know, he's, I mean, his cleavage is nice.
He has some of the nicer cleavage of.
It almost sounds like you're saying he has tits, Jimmy.
I am saying that.
It almost sounds like the last five things you said infer that he has tits.
Yes, I'm inferring that.
You're inferring.
He's implying.
I'm implying.
Yes.
It's a great call the whole thing.
By the way, I think he's right.
Michelle Obama is a hypocrite in the long tradition of first ladies who are hypocrites.
For instance, Laura Bush, who is a huge advocate for literacy, was herself illiterate.
Little known fact.
Really?
At some point she was illiterate?
No, the whole time.
Still.
No, she's a librarian.
Come on.
That's why it was so important.
You said that so seriously, Robert.
I thought you were serious.
That's called straight facing it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Don't do that again.
Really, it scared us, Robert.
Thank you very much.
Hey, John Boehner called me again.
Jimmy Dore.
John Boehner again.
Scratch that last message.
I just had a wonderful meeting with the good people of the Tea Party caucus here in my office.
And they reminded me of a number of things.
Fiscal responsibility, the Constitution, and the American way.
They also pointed out that I didn't really need that chandelier anyhow, and that books only make the fireplace burn brighter.
So, in the interest of compromise, I've decided to rescind my support for the joint strike fighter engine.
I'm also reconsidering past earmarks that Congress has fumbled through, such as the Clean Water Act, the Civil Rights Act, and the Homestead Act.
Listen, the job of the federal government is not to ensure that enfranchised minorities can frolic about averted landscape and improved properties west of the Mississippi.
It's to create jobs.
Don't give me any flack.
Just give me some time on your show.
Boehner out.
Sorry, but the Tea Party likes when I say that.
John Boehner, he's got my number.
He wants to leave me messages.
Why wouldn't he?
That's Josh John Boehner.
Okay, now let's get it.
Even his phone call was a little orange.
The man whose skin color rhymes with nothing.
Don't forget the Jimmy Doer show is available as a podcast for free at iTunes or for other ways to subscribe.
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Well, it's pronounced Door, but it's spelled D-O-R-E.
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Music.
Bye.
Bye.
Okay, we're back at the Jimmy Door store.
We're in Studio B. Are the people at home are popping and locking over that announcement like we are here in the studio?
Whenever we play that, we always start a little pop lock.
I'm more of an electric boogaloo.
Let me just get this piece of cardboard off the floor.
Hang on a second.
Okay.
Okay.
So let's talk about Scott Walker.
He got a phone call from a guy, friend of the show, pretending to be David Koch, the billionaire guy who hates workers.
So let's just play.
I'm going to play some and then we'll just talk about it.
I love people that hate what they exploit.
There's nothing more spiritual than one two punch.
The workers.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But Mark, but Scott Walker really, he really loves the state employees.
He really does.
He said that, and I don't have that clip, but he did say that.
Okay, here we go.
HD, we're going to ratchet it up a little bit.
The Senate Majority Leader had a great plan.
He told him out this morning.
He told the Senate Democrats about, and he's going to announce it later today.
And that is the Senate Organization Committee is going to meet and pass a rule that says if you don't show up for two consecutive days on a session day in the state senate, the Senate chief clerk, it's a little procedural thing here, but can actually have your payroll stopped from being automatically deducted in beautiful checking account.
And instead, you still get a check, but the check has to be personally picked up, and he's instructing them, which we just loved, to lock them in their desk on the floor of the state senate.
Okay, so that's him talking about a little plan to set the state senators who have left Wisconsin and have gone to Illinois to prevent the Senate from having a quorum so they can bust the unions and make it illegal for them to have collective bargaining anymore.
So his trick is we're going to stop them from getting their paychecks directly deposited into their accounts.
We're going to lock them in their desks on the Senate floor.
Oh my God, it's great.
And this is a guy pretending to be Coke saying this.
And Scott Walker doesn't know.
No, no, Scott Walker just said that.
Right, right.
He thinks he's talking to David King.
He thinks he's thinking he's talking and thinks that this is a non-public phone conversation.
Thinks it's the non-communication.
I should also say that this is from Buffalobeast.com, Just so we properly credit the guy who did this.
Buffalobeast.com.
Very good.
Yes.
I saw the guy interviewed.
He's not a very good interview.
Yeah.
I read that.
I kind of got annoyed at the guy when he was being interviewed yesterday.
I was like, more one-word answers, jackass.
Could you do that more?
It was really.
Yeah.
And did you see him interviewed?
Was it Lawrence O'Donnell?
Yes.
Yeah.
He was kind of a jazz.
And then so it left Lawrence O'Donnell to just start asking him stupid questions.
Yeah.
Anyway, so here's some more of the call.
Let's get back into more of the call.
Here is where he talks about a Democrat he could actually talk to.
Why?
Here we go.
Now you're not talking to any of these Democrat bastards, are you?
There's one guy that's actually voted with me in a bunch of things I called on Saturday for about 45 minutes.
Many to tell him that, well, I appreciate his friendship and he worked with us and other things.
Told him why I wasn't going to budge.
Mainly because he's about the only reasonable one over there.
And I figured if I talked to him, he'd go back to the rest of the gang and say, you know, I've known Walker for 20 years.
He's not budging.
What's his name again?
His name is Tim McCullen.
All right.
I'll have to give that man a call.
Well, actually, in his case, I wouldn't call him.
And I'll tell you why.
He's pretty reasonable, but he's not one of us.
Oh, he's not one of us.
You mean a billionaire?
Oh, you're not as billionaire.
You mean somebody who wants to crush the work?
What does he mean?
One of us.
Somehow he's in a group, Scott Walker, the governor of Wisconsin, that includes David Koch.
Not one of us.
Depleted khaki militia.
Yeah.
I think he means a group that includes billionaires and useful idiots.
Oh, okay.
Useful.
I like that term, useful idiots.
Okay, so here he is talking about how he's going to trick the Dems, Democrats, into coming back from Illinois and to get a quorum.
That's the whole thing.
The reason why they fled the state is because they don't have a quorum.
They can't vote on this bill, which is going to outlaw collective bargaining for state employees.
Can I interject?
Sure.
Just to play devil's advocate, is what they're doing any worse than the Democrats leaving so there won't be a vote.
I agree that the bill before it is a terrible bill, but fleeing the state, something about that doesn't seem very well, it feels no different than just threatening to filibuster anything and everything.
Yeah, like the Republicans were doing it.
Yeah, right.
But does that technicality, does that make it right because it's no worse than something else?
No.
I think it depends on what you're fighting for.
And if what you let's put it this way: does it make so you're saying no matter what, a tactic is wrong, is what you're going to say.
No, I'm just saying if we're going to be really even-handed and truthful about this whole thing, shouldn't we discuss whether or not it's ethical to leave something to avoid a vote?
Okay, I'll discuss that.
I think it is.
Okay.
I think this is the battlegrounds that the Republicans created.
That they, you know, they will filibuster anything that moves.
They will pull dirty tricks like this.
This is the battleground.
And, you know, the Dems should be playing more like that.
And so what the Democrats are doing right now is trying to drag out the debate.
So what they're trying to do is ram through some huge legislation without the proper time for the public to get informed about it.
And the reason why they want to do it so quickly is because they know if we drag this out, people will become informed about what's happening and they're going to turn against this.
Because the union has already made all the financial concessions.
What they're doing now is saying Scott Walker wants them to forever give up the right to collectively bargain for their health defense.
It's got nothing to do with it.
Which, by the way, I'm not sure it's constitutional.
I'm not sure you can forbid that.
You can if they're not gay.
Let's put it this way, Paul.
If the Democrats and Barack Obama tried to ram the health care bill through like people accused them of doing, let's say they tried to do it in the first month and then the Republicans walked out and they wouldn't let them.
I would go, hey, I get that.
This is a big piece of legislation.
We need to have debate.
People need to have some more democracy.
I just want to make sure it's not for people all on the same page overlooking.
What they're really doing is they're trying to circumvent democracy, really, is what they're doing.
And what the Democrats are, they're countering it with circumventing democracy.
Yes.
I don't think that they, well, I don't know if that's true.
I think what the Democrats are doing is just trying to drag it out so that people get informed.
And the more people are informed, already at USA poll, they had a poll yesterday, 61% of the people in the poll against what's happening in Wisconsin, meeting the governor.
Okay, I have to get to the next clip.
I'm sorry, Rob.
An interesting idea that was brought up to me this morning by my chief of staff, if we won't do it until tomorrow, is putting out an appeal to the Democrat leader that I would be willing to sit down and talk to him, the Assembly Democrat leader, plus the other two Republican leaders.
Talk, not negotiate.
Okay, really?
I'm not going to negotiate.
Hey, where do I sign?
You'll talk?
Yeah.
That's the kind of guy.
That's the kind of leader.
Let a game of Parcheesi be a deal breaker.
You know, the people of Wisconsin elected me not to work with the Democrats, just to talk with them, not to negotiate with them, to give the illusion of compromise.
To give the illusion that we're working together.
And listen to what they have to say if they will in turn only do it if all 14 of them come back and sit down in the state assembly.
They can recess it to come back over and talk to me, but they'll have to back up.
The reason for that is we're verifying it this afternoon, but legally, we believe, once they've gone into session, they don't physically have to be there.
If they're actually in session for that day and they take a recess, this 19 Senate Republicans could then go into action and they'd have a quorum because they started out that way.
So we're double-checking that.
But that would be the only, if you heard that I was going to talk to them, that would be the only reason why.
Yeah.
If you heard that I was going to talk to the Democrats, the only reason I would ever talk to the Democrats is to try to trick them into a legislative maneuver.
It's not because I would actually want to work with them or because they represent people in my state too, and we're going to try and get some legislation done.
The only reason I would ever talk to a Democrat is because I'm trying to trick them.
That's what he's saying.
Yeah.
And he's admitting it.
Yeah.
Okay.
Because he doesn't think that this phone call is going to be made.
He does not think.
Okay.
So now, you know, a lot of people thought, and Hosni Mubarak planted some troublemakers in the crowd, to make it look like the crowd is the violent people.
And, well, Mr. Koch brings that up to Scott Walker, actually, to do a tactic like that.
What we were thinking about the crowds was planting some troublemakers.
You know, the.
First of all, let me just break in there and say that guy could not sound phonier when he just we're thinking of planting some troublemaker stuff.
And there's Scott Walker.
Well, and Harry Scott Walker.
Well, the only problem with the, because we thought about that.
Oh, they thought about it.
They thought about that.
They thought about planting some troublemakers, some people to commit some violence in the crowds with the teachers.
Where would you find those people in Wisconsin?
Where did you hit the bar on every corner?
I was thinking you get the same people they sent to Florida in 2000 to bully all the vote counters.
Well, David Koch actually did send a couple of dozen or at least a dozen of buses into Madison filled with people.
Yeah, David Koch.
So, you know, it's grassroots.
The problem with, or my only reaction to that would be right now, the lawmakers I've talked to have just completely had it with them.
The public is not really fond of this.
The teachers union did some polling and focus groups, I think, and found out that the public turned on him the minute they closed school down for a couple days.
You know, it's funny that even when he's talking to a supporter, Koch, right, he's lying, right?
Because that's not true.
The people have not turned on the exact opposite.
It's like, does David Koch not read the USA Today?
The guys we got left are largely from out of state, and I keep dismissing it in all my press comments saying, yeah, they're mostly from out of state.
My only fear would be as if there was a ruckus caused, is that that.
So here's the only reason why he wouldn't want to plan.
This is the only reason why he wouldn't want to plant violent troublemakers in with a group of peaceful protesters made up of mostly teachers.
Wait, can I guess?
Is it because he doesn't want to see people get hurt?
Good guess.
Let's see.
That would scare the public into thinking maybe the governor's got to settle to avoid all these problems.
Yeah, so the only reason he wouldn't use troublemakers' violence against the teachers is because it would make people think that he has to solve this problem.
That's what he literally just said.
If there was a lot of trouble and ruckus, people might want me to fix this.
And, you know, I'm not going to.
This is what he's saying.
I love the fact that he uses the words troublemaker and ruckus like it's a Dennis the Menace episode, you know, and not saying like agitators with axe handles.
You know, like, yes, people try.
We're trying to smear teachers and making them out to be thugs.
We're doing the exact thing we accuse the unions of doing.
What if you invite some rascals into town to perpetrate monkey shines?
Yes.
Oh, and then the hooligans will show up and we'll drive labor back another 70 years.
If you wrote a movie where the teachers were the enemy and the billionaire was the savior, people would say in a million years, nobody would ever fall for that.
They're falling for it.
You should go on Facebook with me.
You should go on Facebook with me.
Can I just say that this is like part of one of the worst conspiracies I've ever heard in many ways, but in one way, you know who vilifies teachers?
Totalitarians.
Like that is the first person they go after politically are the teachers.
And that's why we have tenure in this country.
It's so that teachers have the freedom to say what they want when there's a different regime.
And it is really an extra layer of troubling that they're going after teachers.
It's completely false that, you know, these guys are rich, but it's like when they start targeting teachers, get uncomfortable.
Well, let me just say this.
This is a stat that comes from a friend of the show, Jim Earle, on his Facebook page.
He posted this.
In 1924, Stalin bans all free trade unions and outlaws strikes.
In 1929, Mussolini guts trade unions and puts them under corporate and government control.
In 1933, Hitler abolishes collective bargaining, trade unions, and arrests their leaders.
So if you want to.
But did you see the parade he put out?
So if you want to see there's no greater force for democracy than unions.
There's no greater force to give voice to the voiceless, to give a voice to the regular people, to workers, than unions.
And when you get rid of, look at it.
And that doesn't mean that unions have never become bloated or demanding.
It just means the alternative is way, way, way.
Yes, way, way, way, do unions, are unions corrupt?
Is there corruption in unions?
Of course there's corruption.
There's corruption in any organization.
There's corruption in this.
This show is corrupt.
Oh, it's been corrupt since the day it started.
It is, you guys.
We have been taking money from the hemp people for weeks.
Taking money from them?
No.
What has Harry Valley?
That's what I thought.
Have you seen these shoes, though?
They're hemp.
They breathe.
So I just, that's a pretty good stat.
I thought we should.
That's amazing.
But I want to say that there's another layer on top of that, which is the intellectual, because teachers are supposed to be the first line of defense in an informed democracy.
And when they start going after teachers, one of the things that they're saying is, we don't want an informed democracy.
One of the things that Mao Taitung did before he took power is he wrote a long essay basically saying, intellectuals, shut up.
You know, and this is where it starts.
And I know I'm sounding like really conspiratorial, but I don't think I am.
No, I mean, Pol Pot, he killed all the intellectuals.
Even if you had glasses, that was enough of a clue that you might be a reader, so they would kill you.
Why would they invent pot stickers after him if he was such a bad guy?
No, it wasn't.
No, no, no, no.
They invented the poll position was after him.
The video game?
Yes, that was for him.
And there's also a stripper move named after him.
Jimmy, John, scratch that last message.
I just had a meeting here in my office with Mitch McConnell and Orin Hatch that reminded me that I started my career sweeping up my dad's bar in Ohio, chiseling up the dried puke of blackout drunk pie fitters, all the while being called John Boner by the rich kids.
I didn't take all that flack and then work on my golf swing for 30 years to take a bunch of more flack from these tea party kneebobs.
Listen, the original tea partiers actually drank tea.
Have you seen these people?
They should call themselves the 48-ounce Dr. Pepper Party.
Guess what?
The joint strike fighter earmark is back on, baby.
You want obsolete?
We're also buying B-1 bombers and a bunch of World War I biplanes.
Screw it.
I'm also going to order whatever those wacky things are that you see in early footage of people trying to make flying machines before the Wright brothers.
I'm showing up to Capitol Hill in a double-decker bicycle with flapping fan wings and a giant hi-hat just because I can.
And guess what, taxpayers?
You're buying me a new chandelier.
No flack.
Okay, Jets, John Boehner.
We're going to finish our Scott Walker interview and we're going to have to break.
Right now, this is Jimmy Dore on Pacifica.
This is Jimmy Dore.
Hi, everybody.
Welcome back to the Jimmy Door show.
I'm in studio with Robert Yasubura, Paul Gilmartin, and Ben Zelovansky.
Coming up on this half of the show, we're going to finish listening into our prank phone call with Scott Walker, the governor of Wisconsin.
We're going to talk a little bit about Chris Christie and the way he says that union workers are getting a little bit too rich.
And Moron calls in.
He's got a lot to say.
He got Terese a new president, and he's got something to say about the teachers in Wisconsin, too.
Right now, let's finish our last part of that call with Scott Walker in Wisconsin.
Here he is.
They're saying goodbye to each other.
Well, I'll tell you what, Scott.
Once you crush these bastards, I'll fly you out to Cali and really show you a good time.
All right, that would be outstanding.
Okay, there you go.
Whoopsie daisy.
Once you crush these bastards, I'm going to fly you out to Cali.
You're going to have a good time.
That's outstanding.
Earlier in the call, he had talks about, well, if we find out that the unions are paying any money to keep these guys up in hotels or something, that's against the law.
But apparently, a billionaire can fly you out after you crush those people.
Okay, there you go.
And you know what happened?
Somebody must have slipped my number into Scott Walker's phone book or something, or he misdialed because I got a couple of messages from him, and it sounded like he thought he was calling someone else.
I don't know.
See what you think.
See what you can tell me.
Hello, this is Governor Scott Walker calling from Wisconsin.
This message is for David Koch.
I'm pretty sure I got the right number here, but I've never been great with phones.
Anyway, I just wanted to touch base and let you know how we're doing here with third union busting.
Thanks to your support, it's going real well.
People are starting to believe that our budget problem has to do with public employees and not with the corporate tax breaks I gave out.
So we're pretty proud of that.
The next thing we're going to do is just try and corral these 14 Democrats, get them back into the state assembly.
So I took some of the dough you sent and hired some thugs to go around and rough up their families, kidnap their pets, that kind of thing.
Standard stuff.
Anyway, we expect that before too long, we'll get these jokers back in there and voting against the interests of the people of Wisconsin.
Okay.
So thanks again for your generosity, for your friendship, but mostly for your generosity.
Just do me a favor, and I know it goes without saying, but don't let any of this get out because it would look pretty bad if people knew what I was really up to here in Wisconsin.
So thanks a lot, Mr. Coke, sir.
Have a good day.
Scott Walker, he misdialed and got your voicemail.
I don't know if he missed dialed, but I had called in and saying I was David Koch, and here's a number to call me.
And so I left a number, so maybe, and then I put a fake message going else.
I just, this is David Koch.
I feel wrong about this.
I'm not big bashing Democrats over the head.
Please leave me a message.
I feel really voyeuristic about this.
Like, I mean, clearly David Koch is his confidant.
Like, I feel like I listened in on a conversation between two close friends and maybe they were that close, he would have known it was a fake.
That's what I think.
I just think that he knows he gets money from David Koch.
He's probably spoken to him a few times in person and at some fundraisers, I'm sure.
And maybe some golf outings with John Boehner.
Probably golf outing.
But yeah, so he got the wrong number, and he called me.
I got another one.
Hello, Steve.
It's the governor.
Hope things are good with all you fellas there in the IT department.
I need a little assist on something here.
I need your help recalling a voicemail I left.
I think I might have dialed the wrong number and some sensitive information might have gotten out.
You know, I'm a bit of a klutz with this technology stuff.
But anyways, I would appreciate your help and your discretion because if people found out that I can't even dial a phone properly, they might start to think I'm a bit of an idiot.
So if you could get right back to me and help me track down that loose voicemail, I'd sure appreciate it.
Okay, thanks a lot.
Bye-bye.
Wow, this guy really is an idiot.
Yeah.
He really is a dial or something.
It sounds to me like his PBX operator might be a public employee.
Oh, PBX is the electronic phone system.
Okay, here's the, we'll play the end of the conversation again.
Here we go.
Well, I'll tell you what, Scott.
Once you crush these bastards, I'll fly you out to Cali and really show you a good time.
All right, that would be outstanding.
Thanks for all the support and helping us move the cause forward.
And we appreciate it.
We're doing it the just and right thing for the right reasons.
And it's all about getting our freedoms back.
He said it's all about getting our freedoms back.
Our freedoms back.
Because you know who's lost their freedoms?
The billionaires.
It's the billionaires.
What can they even do anymore?
I mean, they've taken away so many of their freedoms.
They've run out of things to incentivize.
Incentivize and monetize.
Yeah.
Well, he's out of just cause, Robert, to just cause.
Yeah, it's not a cause.
But I mean, the thing is, what he's talking about is flexibility of unions and corporate, I'm sorry, corporations and governments to be able to make quick, rapid decisions.
And the thing is, like, I don't, I don't disagree with him per se because what he's talking about is like not having what you have in Europe where you have like strikes and all the time and public issues like that.
Strong economies.
Well, yes and no.
I mean, like Greece is not because the unions are blowing up.
I was thinking more like the industrial powers like Germany.
How are they doing?
They're doing Germany's doing great.
Because if you look at the countries, this is all I tell people on Facebook now.
I want you to find me one country that you would want to live in that doesn't have strong labor unions.
Name one country that doesn't have strong labor unions that you would want to live in.
Look at the other.
Myanmar.
You'd want to live there?
See, that's the kicker.
You'd want to live there.
There's a lot of countries that don't have strong labor unions, but you wouldn't want to live there.
That's what I'm saying.
You look at the economies that do have good labor unions.
The United States, not anymore.
But, you know, Germany, Japan.
I mean, those are strong, vibrant countries.
Wait, it was Japanese.
You can't let that pass.
Japan is not an economically strong.
It's on the rise now, but it's been in the doldrums for 20 years.
And there's a very unique argument to be made that Japan's stall in the 90s has a lot to do with outdated labor laws.
Yeah, with disagreement.
Patronage.
It was things like that.
No.
It was because they still had growth in the 90s, but it was slower growth than ever.
And the reason was because they didn't, they call it the lost decade.
And the reason was because they did exactly what we're doing right now.
They pulled back, did austerity measures, pulled back on spending.
They didn't know how to stimulate their economy.
And that's why they're still stuck where they are.
But Japan has a strong economy.
I mean, we wouldn't, they were the number two economy up until most recently when China overtook them.
I mean, they're still have a great standard of living, and unions are very lot stronger in Japan and Germany than they are in America.
So I understand what you mean about the lost decade, but that did not happen because of the labor unions.
Well, would you agree that in a country like Greece, where the pensions are really bloated, that something needs to be done about that because the government is beyond broke and people are retiring at 40?
No, I'm going to say that's a little bit of an exaggeration, probably.
Probably.
I think people retired at 62 in Greece.
You know, I'll have to look that up.
I can't speak to the Greece point, but I'm just going to say, in general, what happened in this country and what happened in the world was not that working people started to get too much money.
That's not what happened.
What happened was an international scam, which was started in America, which was the securitization of mortgages, this idea that we can just create derivatives in the dark, have people trading, and then sell it all over the world.
And that's what happened because it wasn't all this.
While that was the spark that ignited all of these economies struggling or collapsing, I think you're being disingenuous, saying that there is never an instance where a union hasn't become bloated because it predicted that growth was going to continue and now growth hasn't.
Right.
No, no, I agree with you that there are cases of sure.
Okay, that's all I want.
I just wanted to.
No, no, no.
I agree with you that there are cases, but I'm saying that they're in between.
Yeah, the problems of the nation's world's economies is not because working people are making too much money.
Well, hold on.
The solution to a bloated union is not to take away their right to negotiate for the health convention.
It's to negotiate more strongly with them when the time comes.
You can't say, well, yeah, we agreed to all this stuff, and you worked these years with the understanding that you were going to have these things, but now we're just going to back out on this.
You know, if you want to rework the contracts when the negotiations, like that's the that's what negotiation is supposed to be.
And that's the guy wants them to give it up forever.
And that's because of problems that are happening now.
And that's really the issue.
There are a lot of, I mean, I'm a pro-union person, but I'm also the first person to say, like, there are problems with the unions.
And we are in an economic crisis, and there are rollbacks that are going to need to have to happen.
But he wants to eliminate public employee unions, which, I mean, it's a solution to a problem that we don't have.
Yes.
Right.
Yeah.
Because all the economic problems that he said were caused by the union, they decided to, well, we'll do whatever you say economically.
I still want to get rid of you.
Yeah.
So obviously, this is not about an economy or economics.
This is about ideology and a power grab.
That's all this is.
This is if we can crush the unions, we can get rid of some democratic power.
And then we can turn our country into a lot of people.
What do you got to look at with the right wing?
Is they will use any tragedy as a loophole to jam in their crushing of the middle class.
What they wanted to do in the first place.
Naomi Klein wrote a book called The Which I didn't read.
I read the book review of it.
That's all you have to do.
You read shock doctrine.
You read book reviews.
You sound just as smart as parties.
That's all you have to do is read a book review.
The shock doctrine.
And what she said is that this is exactly what happens when there's some great economic catastrophe.
They then use that to then screw over the workers and implement more of their screwed up.
That's how Hitler did it.
With the runaway inflation.
Is that what we call it?
Well, it's what he exploited.
Yeah.
He exploited.
Yeah, it gave him the excuse to blame it on the Jews and the communists and this and that.
And then he bombed the Reichstag and said that it was the communists.
And then he made himself chancellor because everybody was afraid.
They're like, oh, the communists bombed the Reichstag.
The thing that's infuriating is that both sides have – this is actually such a great opportunity for both sides to sit down and say like, OK, Republicans are right in the sense that we had a lot of unfunded mandates in state governments and that they ran away.
That's OK.
That's a problem.
Let's talk about that.
There are certain unions that are certainly have way more power than they should.
Fine.
Which ones are those?
Prison union.
Yes.
I agree with you on that.
They have huge, way, way, way more power than they should.
I agree with you on that.
I would say – That would be it.
I want to be careful, but like the – That would be it.
Teamsters?
No, the teamsters can shut down an entire economy if they want.
Well, that's good, though.
That's why you have – that's a point.
Right.
They've never abused that power?
I don't know.
Have they?
Can you remember the last time a union abused its power?
I'm having a hard time.
I had a point and then I lost it.
I'm sorry.
I mentioned the prison union.
Yeah.
No, the prison – I'm with you.
You know, but again, the way to deal with the prison unions is to negotiate with them.
It's not to get rid of their – you know, it's – do we want to fund more prisons?
You know, we're spending more money on prisons than we are on teachers right now.
Well, if people would stop smoking pot, we wouldn't have that problem.
Sure.
Good point.
Good point.
They clean up.
People would stop smoking pot.
You know what?
I got one more voicemail from Scott Walker.
I don't know who he thought he was calling, but here it is.
Hey, Colin.
It's Governor Walker.
I'm going to need some help crafting a press release here.
I think I may have made a few goofs on the phone today, and I'm worried that it's going to start to snowball that I can't even handle a telephone, much less manage a state of five and a half million people.
Anyway, if you could get to work on that, that'd be great.
I also had a few other phone calls today from constituents that promised I'd get back to these folks with some answers, so if you could let me know – know whether or not our refrigerator's running that would be great I need to find out if we have Prince Albert in the can and we've got a few calls here for a fellow by the name of Seymour Butts not familiar with him.
I don't know if he's in the policy or constituent services, something like that.
So if you could track him down, I just got a stack of messages here for Mr. Butts.
All right, Colin, thanks very much.
I'll speak to you soon.
Bye-bye.
Scott Walker does sound like an idiot.
Yeah, it's much.
Maybe it's just around phones.
He's just not dealing with phones.
Maybe it is around phones.
He's an idiot in another way, which is he's going after public employees' unions.
His secretary, who brings him coffee, probably a public employee.
Well, I'm just saying the guy probably has drunk a lot more urine in the last couple of weeks than he realizes.
Very good.
Very good.
Hey, it's Jimmy.
Who's this?
Hey, Jimmy, how are you doing?
It's Moron.
Hey, Moron.
What's going on, buddy?
Ah, Jimmy, you know me.
I'm a good American.
I'm easily manipulated to vote against my own economic interest.
And when things don't go my way, I tend to blame those lower on the economic ladder than me for my problems.
But what does bring you comfort, Moron?
The thing that does bring me comfort, Jim, is the fact that my Lord Jesus the Christ hates exactly the same people that I hate.
Isn't that nice?
Moron, what's going on this week?
Have you been watching the news?
Oh, Jim, I've been watching the news all right.
Oh, have you?
And what do you don't like what I see?
Why?
What do you seems like we're turning into Egypt?
How are we turning into Egypt, Moran?
I don't know.
Why what?
Because the unions are taking over.
They're taking over everything and they're going to steal all our money.
Jim, what?
Are you kidding me?
Look what they're doing.
Do you see all those workers in Wisconsin?
They don't got to pay nothing for their pensions.
They don't got to pay nothing for their health care.
Those guys are raking it in.
Moran, do you know the people who you say are raking it in?
Do you know who they are?
Yeah, the workers are for the union workers in Wisconsin.
Yeah, do you know what kind of workers they are?
They're teachers and social workers.
That's who they're upset at.
Yeah, I know, right?
That doesn't seem weird to you that they're angry at teachers.
Not at all.
Not at all.
Moran, I don't get it.
Why are you angry at Jim?
These teachers are greedy, that's why.
They make like a hundred grand.
What?
No, Jim, I saw a thing from the news on Facebook.
Moron, somebody posted that said that teachers make when you add everything up all the benefits.
Yeah, like a hundred grand a year.
Oh my god, I should be a teacher.
Why doesn't everybody be a teacher?
Well, Moron, that's exactly the question that you, yeah, why doesn't everybody?
Because they don't get it.
Yeah, they don't.
If they make a hundred grand a year, you'd think everyone would want to be a teacher.
Morn, I'm telling you that they don't make.
I'm telling you, they don't make a hundred grand a year.
They just don't.
Oh, if I made a hundred grand a year, I'd only work for five more years, and then I'd tell my boss to go F himself.
Man, a lot of those teachers have been teaching for like 20 years, making a hundred grand a year.
They gotta be loaded.
Moron, I wonder why they still drive junky cars, most of them.
Because they don't.
Yeah, they're scrout.
They probably hide their money.
Right?
No, because they don't make a hundred grand a year.
That's why.
Jim, you must not have seen that news article video clip that I seen on the Facebook.
Why would I need to see that thing?
They don't.
I'm telling you.
Our neighbor Victor is a teacher, and his house is smaller than ours.
Yeah, I know.
Our neighbor Victor's got a smaller house than we do, and he's a teacher making a hundred grand a year now for 15 years.
I wonder what he does with all that money.
Yeah, what do they do with it?
You know, they probably save it for their retirement, Therese.
That's what they all have upset about is their retirement.
That's when they get all the money.
I bet you're right.
Moron, have you ever known a retired retired teacher?
Yeah.
Who, exactly?
Teresa's Anton was a teacher.
And how is she doing now?
Oh, she's retired.
Yeah, she's retired now in Florida.
Conveniently, huh?
Where all the rich people go when they retire in Florida?
Okay, where does she live?
Yeah, she lives in where does she live?
Century Village retirement community, Therese?
Yeah, that's right.
Yeah, they got a nice two-bedroom condo down there.
Oh, it sounds very oh, they sound like millionaires.
Well, they're doing okay.
You know, Moron, my parents actually live in a Century Village retirement community in Florida.
Wow, pretty sweet.
What did your dad do for a living?
He was a Chicago policeman.
Ah, he's got all that union money.
See, here's how he can afford it.
No, it's that's a pretty reasonably priced place.
That's why he can afford it.
Not because he has a lot of money, but because it's reasonably priced.
Yeah, reasonably priced for a guy making 100 G a year.
Am I right?
No, you're not right.
Am I right?
No, I'm telling you, you're not right.
No, you are not.
Right?
No.
Well, Jim, if they don't make all that money like you claim, the teachers, then how could it be that the states are all bankrupt because of the teachers and the workers?
Well, they're not bankrupt because of the teachers and the workers.
That's huh?
Yeah, they're not.
They're bankrupt for me.
What are you talking about?
Every time I turn on the news, that's what they say.
Yeah, I know that's what they say on the news.
The news owned by corporations.
Yeah, that the state's budgets are busted because of all the money they gotta pay to the free pensions and free health care to the workers.
Okay, first of all, nothing's free.
They work for it.
This is what they're being compensated for their work.
That's part of the thing.
Do you get that?
No.
And states are having a hard time economically because we're in the middle of recession that was brought on by a horrible economic policy from Wall Street and at the tippy top of society, not because workers are all of a sudden making too much money.
Okay, Moron, that's you gotta get over that.
Hey, we're all coupons, huh?
Where are the coupons, Moron?
I don't know where the coupons are, Teresa.
And where's my prescriptions?
What prescriptions?
You know my prescriptions for my lady problems?
I think I saw them on the table.
I can't find them.
They're not with all those papers on the table.
There's no good way to keep your piles and papers from becoming a mess.
Oh, Teres, I got something for you.
What?
Yeah.
Terese, I got you something that's gonna help you with store all your papers.
Yeah, I got you the clutter, buddy.
Wonderfile.
What is it, Moron?
Jim, it's the clutter, buddy.
Wonderfile.
I love it.
It's an ingenious organizer that turns any space into an organized workplace.
I saw it on TV.
It's the clear four-corner filing system.
It makes it easy to store important documents where you can see them and find them with ease.
See here, Terese, the center packet stores large files and folders, and it's even large enough for a laptop computer.
But we don't have a laptop computer.
I know, but you could if you had one.
It's got a smooth writing surface so you can get your work done neatly and quickly.
And the zipper pocket keeps all your values.
Really?
Yeah, best of all, when you're done, you just store your work, and your clutter buddy folds right up so you can take it anywhere.
Or store it right in the drawer, Terese.
If I can put it in a drawer, why do I need a folder?
Terese.
And it comes in three great colors.
And why did you get me plant?
I thought you liked plant.
I hate it.
You said you liked it when I was wearing a kilt.
What am I supposed to say?
You're a grown man wearing a skirt.
So you lied?
You didn't like it?
Yes, Moron, you got me.
I lied about this skirt.
I get you a nice clutter, buddy.
And that's how you repay me, you insult my kilt.
Well, it's the truth.
Oh, really?
It's the truth.
Well, guess what?
That dress you wore on Valentine's makes your ass look fat.
What?
That's right.
What you hate?
It's the truth.
I just ended up with the giant giant liquor.
You did it.
Yeah, you let your head look fat.
Well, I got a nice kilt.
Okay, that was another Tuesdays with Moron.
Wow, it turns out the clutter buddy cleans up your papers but messes up your mirror.
Oh, Robert the clutter buddy.
Okay, and we're back.
And that's we're towards the end of the show, and I just want to go around and ask anybody.
Any Paul, you wanted to talk about the Middle East.
We didn't get to it today, but you had something to say about it.
You want to say something?
Well, there was some great stuff in the New York Times today about how this is playing into Iran's hands because most of these countries where there's revolts taking place, it's a Shiite majority being ruled by a BI.
So is that like a BI minority?
Sorry, go ahead.
So a lot of the allies that we've supported because they've agreed not to attack Israel or because they have oil or both.
But we've looked the other way as they've cracked down on human rights and basically skimmed all the money that should be going to their people.
Now they're in danger of being overthrown and we are going to have to account for our foreign policy for the last 10 or 20 years.
Which has been propping up dictators who suppressed oppressed their people and we propped them up because they were friendly to Israel and to us.
Yes.
And so we've had a lot of lopsided foreign policy towards Israel, mostly because of AIPAC and a lot of different reasons, but we're left holding.
It's entirement before that.
I mean, it was also like anti-communist stuff before that.
Yes.
And so you're saying we're left holding the bag, you know, shrugging our shoulders, going, well, you know, Mavarg wasn't a bad guy.
Saudi Arabia's not that bad.
Bahrain, I mean...
It's the Muslim Brotherhood and the socialists and the communists and the anarchists and the unions.
That's who's doing this.
And every single thing that we've done since 9-11 has made Iran stronger.
Yes.
And this is one of those things.
Like sending them vitamins.
We shouldn't have done that.
We shouldn't have done that.
No, but this has huge implications for not only what our foreign policy is going to be in the future, but how much it's going to cost.
You know, we could talk about the unions and all this other stuff, but let's look at how much money we pour into wars so that we can stabilize where we get our oil from and so that we can be friendly towards people that agree not to attack Israel.
By the way, the thing is, is that spending money in Egypt and spending money in the Middle East in terms of just giving them money, best money we ever spend.
It has kept us from wars in a lot of instances.
Don't you think, to that point, Robert, don't you think we would be better off instead of spending the $100 billion a year in Afghanistan if we just had a plane fly over Afghanistan and drop $100 billion in bills over it?
And they would go, oh, look, that American plane just gave us $100 billion.
I think that would do more good.
There is no question that our overseas money that we spend on foreign policy.
Do you think supporting Mubarak was good?
No, I wouldn't say it was good, but I think it stabilized the region.
We're up against the clock, fellas.
Hey, thanks for listening this week.
I want to thank everybody who helped make this show possible.
Ben Zalovansky, Paul Gilmartin, Robert Yasimura, Stan Stankos, Mike McCrae doing the voice of John Boehner today.
Ben Zalovansky doing Scott Walker today.
And I want to thank Step Samurano doing the voice of Terese on moron and helping me write those.
So they're always fantastic.
And I want to thank my producer, Ali Lexa, and everybody at KPFK.
We're in Fun Drive right now.
And you could also stop by JimmyDoorComedy.com.
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