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Welcome to the DelingPod with me, James DelingPod.
And I know I always say I'm excited about this special guest.
But before we meet her, let's have a word from one of our superb sponsors.
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Can you guess what it does?
I can't road test it at the moment because my wife's still recovering from hospital.
She's no good to me.
But maybe on my behalf, you can have a go and road test it.
Libido Boost.
It's by our old friends at NutriHealth365.com and you like their...
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You liked their Immune X365. Well, they've got this new product, Libido Boost.
And it's got in it, well, some ingredients I've heard of.
It's got ginseng extract.
It's got ginkgo biloba leaf extract.
It's got ganoderma lucidum extract.
It's also got maca.
I know about Macca, not as in Paul McCartney, it's only got 1C instead of 2. Macca I know is very effective in that department.
It's also got Damiana extract.
Anyway, it's got 8 natural ingredients in it all together and I can't guarantee it's going to work because I haven't tried it.
But I'll tell you what.
I'm sure it's a lot less unpleasant than Viagra, which I can't stand.
I'd rather not have sex than ever use a big pharma erectile product, even if I need one, which I don't, by the way.
Anyway, you can get this stuff at NutriHealth365.com.
It's called Libido Boost.
And there's some kind of deal they're offering, which I can, if I look it up, hold on, it says, it says, When you buy any two supplements, you get 10% off.
And if you buy any three, you get 16% off.
On top of that, you get free Royal Mail two-day tract delivery on every order.
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You can get it from NutriHealth365.com and it is called Self-explanatorily, libido boost.
Good luck, chaps and chappesses.
Enjoy.
Welcome back.
Welcome back to The Delling Pod, Tanya Edwards.
Hello, Jones.
Tanya, because you're kind of like my female dick, we can just...
The phrase, the youth phrase, is not chat shit, I don't think, because chatting shit means...
I think bad-mouthing people.
You're just shooting the breeze.
Shooting the breeze is marvellously old-fashioned, yes.
We're just going to shoot the breeze.
Do you know what was happening just before we turned on this podcast?
I was practically struggling with my tech.
So...
Yeah, a tech thing.
I'm not talking about our tech mishaps before where I couldn't hear you or you couldn't hear me.
No.
What happened was, my boiler, this thing happened and I didn't think it was possible, where the radiators go on even when your programming device says they should be off.
It's like the radiators have a mind of their own and they're like evil.
They want to be on and you don't want them on.
Is this because you set it to a certain temperature?
No, it isn't that.
I was astonished that such a thing could happen in the world of plumbing.
I just thought timers were reliable things that when it was off, there was no way that the signals could go to the boiler to send it to pump round water.
Imagine at night.
Are you one of those people who...
No, you must be not.
Do you sleep with your windows open at night?
No, my mother does.
She sleeps with her windows open and heating on.
Oh, no, no, I wouldn't do that.
No.
So, you mean you sleep with your windows closed at night?
Yeah, normally, yeah.
No!
Is that bad?
Yeah, really bad.
Oh, God.
They're very old windows.
You can still feel the air coming through them, James, even when they're shut.
That won't do.
Have you got sass windows?
I've got the old ones.
Yes.
I could not sleep in a room which did not have fresh air coming through.
And in fact, if I do it by mistake, you know those stupid arguments you have with your spouse?
Well, of course you do.
One of the most guaranteed to cause massive irritation.
Is if we discover that one of us has forgotten to open the windows.
If the other one has given the indication that they left the window open and they haven't, then there is great fury.
Because in the morning, if I slept without my window open, I get really bad tempered.
I know it.
Because there hasn't been enough oxygen in the room or something.
It just, like, drives me nuts.
Oh, well, at least you both agree on that, though.
That's nice.
Imagine if she didn't like that.
Yeah, I... Actually, that's true.
I once had to share a bedroom.
This was one of the more unpleasant experiences in my life.
Be careful, don't give your time away, James.
I had to...
I was...
There's a place I used to work, which I'm actually forbidden by gagging contracts, whatever, gagging clauses for even talking about.
Oh, yeah.
Which is fine.
And at this particular organisation...
I was being flown out with my junior colleague to go and announce our arrival to this company.
We're going to attend some, you know, some jolly in America.
And they decided, heaven knows why, to give us a shared bedroom, shared hotel bedrooms.
Like at the airport or something.
Economics, I imagine.
So I had to share a bedroom with a man that was just like my underling.
Who had other ideas about this station?
Is your superior or your underling?
I don't know.
I only mention he was my underling because he was convinced he was my boss.
And he wasn't.
He just wasn't.
He was really cocky and really ambitious.
Exciting player in the bedroom he didn't want to share.
He was one of the most pushy people I've ever, ever known.
Aggressively pushy.
Just didn't know how things are done.
His way was not the English way.
Oh, he'd say he was foreign.
Well, sort of culturally...
Yes, yes.
Culturally, he was not, he did not come from my cultural background.
His assumptions were very different.
Anyway, I remember this tussle that we had over the bedrooms, over the windows.
He wanted the windows closed.
I'm not sleeping, sharing a room with you, you sweaty person that I only know on a kind of business way.
Having to sleep next to you in a bed is bad enough, but having to breathe your air, Um, undiluted by fresh air from outside is just like the...
Anyway, that was just a flashback.
What have you been up to?
Well, I just saw you on the weekend, didn't I? And I saw your brother twice talking of Dick.
He was bragging about his new trousers and I wanted attention for my new boots.
But, um, yeah, I've been really busy.
Alistair and I are doing, um...
These shows together.
We've sold out this Saturday, but we've just put one on sale for March.
So I'm doing that with Alistair Williams.
And I help Bob with his book because I've been selling books.
Everyone needs to buy a book.
And I've been working on some new writing projects.
What else have I been doing?
Christmas shopping, singing carols, trying to not look at the world.
Have you been, we'll come on to the work stuff in a moment, but have you been singing carols?
Yes.
Yeah, I sing them in secret days because they have a horrible voice, but I love them.
Oh, do you?
Yeah.
That's really sad.
I know.
I was hoping you were going to reveal to me that you have a nice voice.
No, I don't.
And that would have been a happy thing to learn.
I play the guitar badly, and then I sing worse.
But you can still enjoy yourself, even if you have no skill.
Can you sing and play the guitar at the same time?
Yes, I can.
But if you do three things in a horrible way, it's no credit to you.
I suppose not.
I do like going to a carol service because it gets you in the mood, doesn't it?
There was an amazing one with my son the other day.
My son was singing in the choir and it was in St Mary Abbott's in High Street Kensington.
Beautiful church.
Raising money for charity.
It's one of those, yeah, I feel very anxious now about all things charitable, but in principle...
I've never been into that church.
I know what you mean.
It's on the High Street.
Have you not been in?
No.
It's really fantastic.
I think you should look.
I love looking in.
Well, I wasn't a kind of working, practicing Christian when I lived in...
I used to live in, above High Street, Ken.
Oh really?
But God wasn't on my list of priorities at that time.
You weren't even curious about the lovely buildings.
I'm always curious about the churches, even before I believed anything.
I remember being in Rome years ago and going into a church there where they were singing by candlelight and you could feel God in the church.
I didn't even believe I was an atheist, but the air resonated.
It was the most extraordinary place You could feel the faith in the room, as if it was a physical thing, a physical ambience.
But my other half was bored, so we left, but I cried.
Was it my favourite Roman church, which is Santa Maria Trastevere?
I don't know.
It's just I go into all of the churches.
I don't think it was a fancy one.
I mean, they're all beautiful.
It was a service.
I went to, we were just in, where were we?
Otranto.
And I always look at all of the different places.
They have these chapels on the roundabouts and they have a beautiful church, but it would always be closed when I went up there.
And then eventually I realised you had to go up at seven o'clock in the morning or something to go inside this church.
And I went and it was actually the nuns would have their service then.
So I just sat at the back like an interloper, watching everything.
And then at the end of the service, other people from the town started to come in.
It's quite nosy, I suppose.
No, that's great.
It's really good when you chance on these things.
I mean, I like the way...
Well, with the Orthodox Church, for example.
I went to the Orthodox Church in Venice.
Which is the church that Shakespeare used to go to, i.e.
Edward de Vere, Earl of Oxford, when he was living in Venice.
He used to go to the Greek church.
And it's well worth checking out.
I mean, I'm very suspicious of Venice, generally.
I love Venice.
Yeah, it's fantastic, but it's also satanic.
I think that don't look now.
It captured just how sinister Venice is.
I mean, look, okay, so yes, there are lots of lovely churches there, and you could, if you're in the right frame, see that as a celebration of God's glory.
But at the same time, the money that went into...
I mean, the churches were kind of money laundering operation, weren't they?
Well, I do know, because I was thinking about this the other day.
I've been reading this...
Well, I don't know if you're familiar with Julius Savona.
He has some controversial opinions on jazz.
But anyway, he writes extensively about all of the different traditions and symbolism and cultures.
And he, in one of these essays, is talking about the loss of magic.
So people used to understand That things could go both ways, i.e.
that they were vulnerable to outside forces that weren't necessarily tangible or, you know, were metaphysical, but also that they could manipulate them.
But when you lose magic, you lose the consciousness that you might be vulnerable to certain things.
But by the same token, if you look at somewhere that's profoundly religious, then obviously it's going to be Such a consciousness of the other side that it's going to be both ways, isn't it?
It's going to be the darkness and the light.
It's going to be very visceral in that place.
So I'm not suggesting that you're wrong.
I'm just saying that, of course, where there's absolute understanding that there's something greater than us and that we're just not a material reality, you're obviously going to have all of that energy.
It will just be a question of what you're choosing to channel.
And obviously, whenever money is involved anywhere, people go dark.
At least they used to go...
At least people used to be conscious that they were being greedy, and now they don't even realise that they're doing anything wrong.
They think that they're doing something right.
It's bizarre.
Once money becomes everybody's raison d'etre, they don't even understand that they're giving anything up.
They just think that they're winning all the time.
Or losing all the time, but only on one value that has no value.
It's an illusion.
It's very strange.
I guess that's where we are though now.
The period of illusions.
It's very odd.
I'm amazed at what's happening, really.
What's particularly amazed you of late?
Well, obviously, just the extraordinary number of people that have said to me, everything's going to be okay now because Trump got in.
It's hilarious.
Really smart, intelligent people.
In fact, one of them, really smart guy, he worked years ago as an advisor on the Trump campaign.
And he said even then, Kamala Harris was polling as one of the most unpopular characters on the political scene.
And I said, well, and he said this, apropos of the fact that I said, I think people got used to Biden, you know, falling over, dribbling ice cream down his chin and sniffing children.
He was quite peaceful.
You could just ignore him and be attached to your label.
But obviously, that wasn't going to be enough.
You know, they had to bring in somebody actively annoying, who was profoundly irritating on the ear, really greeted you.
And he said, well, yeah, she was the most unpopular figure years ago.
And I said, well, you have to be able to see that these things are incompatible as stories.
You know, if you have drain the swamp and then you have swamp the boats, you can see that it's a tale of two swamps here, that it's this sort of catch phrasing, et cetera, et cetera.
But obviously, if you believe that a machine cannot count your votes, And that everyone would not count your votes with this machine just to keep you out of power.
You cannot believe at the same time that by swamping the vote, i.e.
by going and voting, that the machine is going to suddenly count you because there are more of you.
You can't believe both of those stories at once.
You have to choose.
But it turns out you don't have to choose.
You can believe both of those things at once.
You can come in as...
The father of the vaccine you can win on a health ticket.
I think it's extraordinary.
And there is Elon Musk who is the funniest of all.
I try not to look too often because sometimes it makes me cross.
But every time I do look he's shooting some fiery phallus into the sky and he's talking about honesty and politics and And how they have to save all this money that the deep state has been wasting.
And then he's also retweeting stuff like, yeah, a trillion sounds like a solid investment for his city building project on Mars.
People used to joke if you got an email from a Nigerian prince asking for an investment in his.
Whatever.
And because everyone could see it was a scam.
But now that some guy has bought democracy and apparently saved us all, they think that he's going to build a city 250 million miles away.
He couldn't build a cathedral in his own town.
Why do they think he's going to be able to create Croydon in outer space?
I can't.
I think it's hilarious.
But sad, I suppose.
Because these are all of the people...
Is that how far away it is?
Well, you'll love this, James.
It's 250 million miles away, except when it's close, when then handily it's only 33 million miles away.
33, seriously?
Yes, 33. So when it's 33 million miles away, that's when we have to seize our moment and up.
I mean, I just think...
How long do you get?
How long is the gap?
Is it like, you know, half an hour?
Long enough, apparently, to take some building materials over and build something that no one even discussed.
It's so...
Palpably absurd.
But I have said this for a long time and I'm tedious about it.
The people that were more attached to their labels, you know, the people that wanted to be called nice.
It wouldn't matter what they were doing.
They could be murdering someone.
If they could call themselves left-wing, they thought that that was legitimate.
So those people were already redundant.
You know, the people that just...
Think that you're doing them a favour if you directly say to them that you want to kill them.
Oh, thank you.
That's so nice.
Please make that available for my mother too.
And those people are redundant.
They're a redundant force.
They're not a threat to anybody.
They can't see power.
They can just do what it tells them to.
They're not relevant.
But the people that were...
Supposed to have some discernment who spent years saying that the whole story was a lie.
They have now decided that this story is the truth and it's the most extraordinary combination of hubris and gloating.
So they seem to love the idea that they are now the mainstream.
I can't think of a greater insult than being told I am now the mainstream media.
I think that that is that's a hint, but they seem to think that that is terrific and they are Gloating as if it's the greatest delegation I've ever seen.
People aren't even worried about what's happening where they are.
They actually think a man in America can save them in England because they can slag people off on Twitter.
It's mind-boggling.
But I don't think it's curious what they're doing here because here they've just gone the other way.
So I was looking at that fat injection Sadly not the one that can give you the fat where you need it, but the one that takes it away.
What's that poisonous one that was making all the people...
Oh, Zempik.
So it's one of those clever things where they make a big fuss of a product and then withdraw it so that everybody believes that the system works.
Oh my god, well obviously it works because there's this dubious product so they've withdrawn it straight away.
But what's curious about this cow fart poison is...
You know, whatever it's called, the stuff that they're putting in there.
Very bad.
Yeah.
What's curious about that is that they're not taking it away.
They're just saying, yeah, that's fine.
And it's obviously been tested and it's only conspiracy theorists that would say this is a bad idea.
And I think that This I find fascinating.
So you have two separate things working in tandem.
One is that the system actually functions, because even when you have the deep state fiddling your voting machines, the good fun character is going to win.
The story is still going to end as it should according to the script.
But at the same time that democracy is being saved, Here, we're just being told directly, oh yes, we're poisoning you now, but it's a good idea, because it's been tested.
And I'm assuming that this must be to demoralise people, because there, there was an interesting clip I saw, it was Tucker Carlson, and he was saying that the Democrats had lost control of their story, and once you lose control of your story, you can only make people do things by force.
And he basically said, if you care to actually listen to him, he was saying that you can either coerce people into doing something via propaganda or you have to physically use force to make them do it.
Now anyone with any sense can see It's very hard to physically force hundreds of millions of people to do something.
But if you can persuade them that their story is a good story and just make them do things voluntarily, that that's an easier way for people to have power.
So when people say, you know, obviously Trump is better than the other option, I think, well, no, what is the other option?
The other option is that millions of people were dissatisfied and turned away entirely from the political system.
But that would obviously be better, wouldn't it, than people feeling complacent about a salesman who's about to sell them some more shit they don't need.
But here, it's as if we're just being told directly, it's too late now, you can't do anything about it.
You can't do anything.
We're just going to take your land.
We're going to physically, we're going to steal from the farmers, openly, we're going to steal from them.
We're going to show you, with our numbers, that we're giving that money that we're going to raise away to foreign people.
In foreign lands for foreign farms.
So they're openly robbing the country that they're supposed to represent.
Doesn't matter how you feel about charity, you cannot physically take somebody's property.
You used to not be able to.
You used to have to lie.
You used to have to try and...
It's a bit of conjuring.
You used to have to try and trick people with your propaganda.
But here they're just saying it straight out.
We're just taking that away from you.
And we're going to ruin your view with our farms.
With our wind farms.
Which don't work.
And we're also going to poison you.
And there's nothing you can...
And we're going to put you in prison if you comment on things.
It's not...
There's no...
It's just wild that there's no...
Yeah, so there, in America, they can see that they have to lie, and they openly say, we either win it with our propaganda, or we'll have to force you.
And here, they're just saying, we're just going to force you.
It's a very curious time, but obviously the only thing that can, in my opinion, help is if everybody turns away from it en masse, because we're paying for it, of course.
We're paying for this stuff.
We're paying for all of this advertising to rob ourselves.
But it's the same arrogance of this, we're the media now.
You use, don't you, you use all of the...
The whole idea of democracy is basically total conscription, total taxation, Totalitarianism, that's what it is.
You're just using the guise of the people, or the people's will, to knock down all the remaining little bollards to power, so that you can have a total dictatorship.
And obviously it's very hard to see at the beginning, because people are so envious and greedy, they're just trying to take what they want.
You know, like those mad women that are always trying to get onto Mount Athos because they can't bear the idea that some men are praying.
You know those ones, they always write for the Guardian.
They're always trying to bother the monks because they're so narcissistic.
It's embarrassing.
But for hundreds of years now, I suppose, we've just been used to knock down the different defences that are actually defences for us against the total control grid.
And this is the last one, I guess.
It's just going to be total noise.
Noise in the public square.
Well, it's quite sad.
Oh no, I've depressed myself.
I was in such a good mood.
I was singing badly in my kitchen.
It's hard not to...
Here's a thing.
I've realised that all this stuff has been going on for so long and...
At least in our grandparents' generation.
Well, I mean, obviously before that.
But I just happened to be glancing in my bathroom at an old book review of a book about Lauren Bacall and Humphrey Bogart.
And the review was about a film that one is encouraged to think of as a classic.
I've never seen it, but To Have and To Have Not.
It's the one about put your lips together and, you know, can you whistle, put your lips together and blow.
And this would have got our grandparents jolly excited at this scene, this legendary scene.
It was made in about 1943, I think.
Now, When I was growing up, Bogart and Bacall were sold to me.
They were these cultural references, which one was supposed to go in.
I mean, one of these is a man.
It's not supposed to be, but I don't know.
No, no, not that.
Not that.
I don't think Lauren Bacall was a man, uncharacteristically.
I'm not going to go there.
I don't know.
She was 20. And he was 43 or 44. Now, I know that I don't want to diss people who are in mixed age relationships.
Some women are very happy with much older men and that's fine.
My friend has just had a baby, another baby with her husband who's in his 70s now.
She's your age.
She's younger than me.
Lucian Freud, who I think was a complete wrong, obviously.
Lucian Freud Was forever impregnating much, much younger.
She's been desperate for this.
You know, this is her second son.
And I love this guy, by the way.
He's absolutely fantastic.
But he already has adult children.
He's not been pushing for more.
So I think that these things are probably, you know, a vibe thing.
They're an energy.
Here's the thing.
This woman is irresistible, by the way, and sensational in every...
I'm not saying it doesn't happen and I'm not saying it shouldn't happen.
What I'm saying is that if you are going to make the iconic romance of the 1940s, a film that everyone should have seen, or so we're told, and it's got lots of innuendo and famous scenes like that, put your lips together and blow.
I just love that line, dude.
It is pretty damn weird having a 20-year-old girl with a 43-year-old man.
44-year-old man.
It's just...
And there's quite a lot of this.
There's another one.
Is it...
I think...
Roman Holiday, I think?
You've got Audrey Hepburn and...
Is it Cary Grant?
I forget.
Again...
A much older man.
Hang on, let's have a look at Roman Holiday.
Oh no, that's Gregory Peck.
I think he's much, I think he's older, but there's another one where her dad is a chauffeur.
And what's that film?
It's one of the classic Audrey Hepburn films.
I feel we're getting lost here, James.
We're just giggling the ages of characters in films.
Yeah, but...
Oh, Sabrina.
Sabrina.
Who's Sabrina?
Yeah, and that's again Bogart and William Holden competing for Hepburn.
So they'd have been...
So, yeah.
Humphrey Bogart would have been 53. 54 when that...
And again...
She'd have been much younger.
When was she born?
If she was a woman, of course.
1929. 29, so she'd have been 24. 24, 25. So you see how...
Okay, so now it's impossible to watch TV without having in-your-face games.
In your face, in your face, gay sex.
I have to do this stuff because I'm a TV reviewer.
You are more likely to have depicted gay sex than heterosexual sex.
If there's a woman, she's more likely to have a lesbian lover than she is to be in a conventional relationship.
So, each generation, they up the ante.
I mean, I keep going on about Doja Cat videos.
Talking about upping the ante, James.
Look at this.
Let's see if you can see this.
Can you see this?
This is an advert for a dress.
Is that a man?
Well, that's supposed to be a woman.
And what looks like a cock there is obviously supposed to be incidental.
But look, can you see?
Look!
Yeah.
Well, I can only see a blur.
But maybe...
Because it's recorded locally.
Because my internet's bad.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure.
But I'm not denying...
That's a regular high street brand.
I'm not penis denying.
I'm just...
Yeah, but that's exactly it.
This stuff.
Oh, Daisy, go.
No, no, no, I'm not gonna...
What?
I do think the weirdest stuff is what's happening with the children's primers.
I know that I'm always whining about this, but my son came home with another one the other day and it was a vet and he was flying.
It's so interesting the stories that they're saying.
So in this terrible book, the vet is flying by helicopter to save a zebra that's been bitten by a big cat.
As it should have been.
Yeah.
It should have been eaten.
Exactly.
And what I'm trying to explain to my son is that obviously this vet isn't going to go and rescue a zebra that's been bitten by a cat because either the lion's going to eat the zebra as it's his lunch or the zebra is going to be eaten by vultures, etc.
Anyway, the vet, after helping the zebra, hops back into his helicopter and there is a wild herd of buffalo stampeding.
And...
One of these buffalo is sick and the vet says, I'll jab that.
And injects the buffalo.
And there's a picture of this guy with this big injection with the stuff coming up the top and just says, yes.
And this is the second primer I've had recently where they're vaccinating in their book.
And Adam Kaye's new book, you know the guy that wrote those books for the children?
He actually talks about anti-vaxxers in his book and how disgusting they are and about the vaccine miracle.
I mean, they're nicely published books.
I gave one to my friend Nevi because she wanted to give it to her kids, but I ripped out all of the stuff and the vaccines first.
But really, we've got to accept that all of these things are going to be a lie.
And then even they've got a book called Polar about the Arctic and Antarctica.
And obviously it says that this is the place that everybody's agreed that they're never going to fight over, even though it's one and a half times the size of America.
So now if you want to find conspiracies, you just need to look in any kid's book and see what they're teaching.
So, for example, this dinosaur book.
They have these pictures, these maps of the landmasses.
And I said to my son this morning, well, this is an audacious attempt to speculate on what the landmass looked like 300 million years ago, when the map that they're using for today is the Murgator map, which is the navigational map.
Now, because there's some friction in my house, my son was adamant that this is true.
And I said, well, of course it's true.
It's a navigational map.
If it wasn't accurate, people couldn't use it to navigate.
I'm just wondering if these maps are their ideas of what might have been a navigational map 200 million years ago, or if these maps are supposed to be true to science.
He's only five.
I lost him at that point.
But you've got to get them thinking, haven't you?
I think it's quite bleak.
Especially the climate stuff that they're being taught.
They have these eco-ambassadors and they have things like Park and Stride.
So the idea of Park and Stride is that to save the planet you park your new Tesla a couple of Feet further away from the school and you stride up those last few steps.
This is obviously a palpable nonsense.
It's...
It could never be better for anybody that you buy a new car than you used your old one.
You don't need...
That could never be better, could it?
It could never be better.
If they want...
Miriam, you know Miriam Ellia?
She always says, when she's over, when we give the children a carton of something, which we shouldn't, I know.
It should all be...
Clean water has been filtered.
But anyway, when we give them a juice, she always comments that they put the straw in plastic.
So the paper straw is wrapped in plastic.
Obviously the straw should be plastic and it should be in a paper wrapper if you were going to choose which way round, but everything is a constant piss take.
And the idea of having to buy a new car and set up a whole new system of fueling it to save energy is demonstrably ridiculous.
Do you know anyone who drives a Tesla who is not a wanker?
Yes, actually.
Do you?
Did I tell you this last time we chatted?
Because I can't remember when it happened, but this wonderful man, really wonderful, very, very clever, but mega normie, Very smart guy.
And this is interesting too, because my son's at a cosmopolitan school, you know, for the global elite, so they can work out how to apply democratic theory to taking over the world.
But it's interesting because I know Russians and Ukrainians at this school, and there is no doubt that bad things are happening there.
So Obviously we're not supposed to really think about it, are we?
We're just supposed to take everything on trust and assume that the answer is more money and more weapons and more death.
More storm shadows.
Yeah, it's really bleak.
But this man, he's English.
You'd like him.
Very clever guy.
And he came round to my son's birthday party and he was showing me pictures of the clouds.
Because they're always in Dubai, these rich people.
So they know what cloud seeding looks like.
Because it's open there, they think it's great.
So he's saying to me, well, what's this?
And I said, well, it's weather modification, isn't it?
He said, but they do this in Dubai.
I said, yeah, and they're doing it here.
And he said, but why would they do that?
I said, well, I don't know.
Obviously, it's going to affect the crops, isn't it?
It's going to affect this, it's going to affect that.
He said, well, that sounds very conspiratorial to me.
I said, listen, you've come here.
You're showing me photographs of the clouds that you can see are being seeded.
So why don't you...
He suggested to me a benign explanation for this project that none of us want.
And he was a little flummoxed then.
And this is even more interesting.
He said something about population, and I said, well, the numbers aren't true.
You know, you must have seen this, that if you wanted to look at the actual UN official numbers of the bigger cities, According to those official numbers.
So I'm not talking now about whether or not you believe the numbers.
I'm saying always if you're just comparing the stories that you're being told.
So the official numbers for the size of cities do not match the official projections for the population.
In other words, if those numbers are correct, they couldn't possibly extrapolate from those numbers their projections for global population.
They don't match.
They're wildly out.
There are billions and billions of people out.
And he said to me, the same supernormal guy, He said, well, it's interesting that you say that because in Portugal, if you look at the actual country, there's nothing in it.
You know, there's no one lives there apart from these big cities.
He doesn't mean no one lives there.
Obviously, people live in villages.
But he can see that that must be true, too.
I said, well, why don't you have a look at these numbers for me, these UN numbers, and you can explain how they made such a big error by all of these billions of people.
And he said, alright then, you should send me those numbers.
So I will.
I will get round to doing that.
Obviously, he's had about 75 million injections.
But even people that trust everything, that are very successful, that are very comfortable and confident in their world view, can see now that things are awry.
And I don't think it's cutting it anymore that it's all by mistake.
I think that they're...
I think...
They are saying it can't all be an accident.
That must be why they're now openly publishing about this weather modification and stuff.
I think that they're ready to release some of this information into the domain.
Because what they're selling now, obviously, is debate.
I've been looking at the Trump thing only in as much as what are they constantly pitching?
What is Elon Musk always pitching?
What is that That guy, Owen Benjamin, is so funny about Kennedy and his...
Have you seen that stuff when Owen Benjamin talks about how Kennedy's just been eating too much pussy and that's why he croaks?
Anyway, we don't need to be vulgar, but it's really funny.
Who said that?
Owen Benjamin is always talking about...
You know Robert Kennedy and he's going to save us all with his health programme?
Yeah.
And they're always taking pictures of them eating burgers, talking about how the COVID crisis should have been...
Treated differently.
There was no crisis, and you're not on our side.
But I am...
Oh my god, it's actually really funny.
But they...
I can't remember what I was saying.
What was I saying?
What was I banging on about?
I've just been thinking about Benjamin and his pandas.
Well, yeah, you shouldn't go onto the pandas because that will distract you.
You were talking about Kennedy and your scepticism about him.
Oh, that's what they keep saying.
That's what they're selling.
Because I'm always looking at what they're selling.
And what they're selling at the moment is this idea of debate.
They're saying all the time, this could not have happened if there had been open debate.
If there hadn't been censorship, this couldn't have happened.
All we needed was for there to be a conversation.
Well, this is a lie.
Because either you were looking for the truth, Or you are looking for a debate, but they're not the same thing.
Because something's either true or it's not true.
You're not going to get closer to the truth by just talking about lots of untrue things.
And you're not going to get closer to the truth with noise.
Now, there are incompatible truths in as much as there are things that affect people in different ways.
But there isn't...
The whole COVID thing was a lie.
Having had more debate about how you were supposed to lie to people wouldn't have helped.
It's not going to help if we all start debating whether or not we should be sprayed every day.
These things are untrue.
So to persuade people...
That all we actually need is more chat and that the people that are the news now are the masses.
Whilst also openly saying that it's all going to be covered by an algorithm, you're not going to be getting anywhere.
You're going to be hearing lots of noise that's being entirely modified for you against your best interests by artificial intelligence.
That is not going to get you closer to anything.
The only way to approach I suppose, things, is to switch it all off.
I don't know how we do that, though, because we like listening to it, don't we?
Can I just rewind you to a point about 30 seconds ago, where it reminded me of my new insight.
Because, you know, I've brought out this book I wrote, Watermelons.
I've done a revised issue.
I meant to get one.
You were sinning, I forgot.
Oh, I'll give you one, don't worry.
Thank you.
When I was fighting the climate wars, I used to imagine that there were the baddies who were the greens in cahoots with the climate industrial complex, in cahoots with academe, in cahoots with the money, with the renewables industry and stuff like this.
And then there was a heroic band of sceptics funded by sort of free market think tanks.
And we were occasionally would get a piece in the newspapers explaining that global warming was all bollocks, basically.
It was, you know, the science didn't hold up and when will people see sense?
And the thing I didn't realise at the time Is that though obviously the climate industrial complex is, you know, full of baddies, wrong-uns, just lying and stuff, that the resistance that you see in the newspapers, you know, the think tanks, it's also been co-opted.
It's there to give you false hope.
Of course!
So, for example, I used to go to a lot of climate-sceptical conferences around the world, And I used to hang out with these, they're great guys, lovely old professors, because the people fighting the fight tend to be people who've retired, so they're honorary professors, they're not dependent on the system anymore, because if they were, they'd be out of a job.
So they're emeritus professors.
And so you hang about with these lovely old blokes who can see it's all bollocks.
And you listen to them give very detailed talks on why the forcings and feedbacks don't indicate that man-made CO2 emissions are causing the planet to warm.
It's not unprecedented.
Or you'll get studies of dendrochronology.
It's all quite abstruse.
And you think, yeah, guys, go!
You know, you're coming up with these arguments, demonstrating that the science doesn't stand up.
But actually, they're speaking to avoid...
Their purpose, little do they know it, is to reassure people of a sceptical frame of mind that, yeah, their issues are being addressed and discussed, like debated, when really...
Climate...
All you need to know, climate change is total bollocks.
Man-made climate change is total bollocks.
It was invented by the Rockefellers in the 1940s in order to expand their...
Control grid.
Their control grid, exactly.
But this is...
There's two things here, though.
One is that, obviously, if you just look at something as simple as milk bottles, we used to reuse our milk bottles...
It could never be better for the environment to have 60 million plastic milk bottles having to be recycled every day, even if you did all of the recycling.
That could obviously not be better than just reusing something.
So these are very fundamental basic things that you can work out for yourself that you can see yourself.
Obviously if I reuse a glass bottle that is going to be better than if I use seven plastic bottles in a week and think I recycle them.
But quite separately, Well, I guess it's the same thing really.
When people talk about something that's environmentally friendly, it should be something that is friendly to your environment.
You only have to look at these revolting wind farms to see that they're not friendly to their environment because they are ugly and they kill the birds.
You don't need to know anything to see that a field of solar panels is going to kill the grass underneath the solar panels.
It's killing the birds.
It's ugly.
It doesn't suit the environment.
Therefore, it cannot possibly be friendly to the environment.
Obviously, if you want to look into how they're made, etc., etc., or how they all get crunched up in the sea, you know that it's worse than vile.
You know it's absolutely evil, profoundly evil.
But even if you didn't know it was profoundly evil, you can see that it's ugly and therefore it's not friendly.
It's like I told you about my friend who thinks you can carbon offset a 7,000 passenger ferry or whatever you call those revolting floating toilets.
You know the ones.
And he'd done some gigs on it.
Fair enough.
Whatever.
But he was like, oh, well, it's...
It's environmentally friendly because they offset it.
I said it's never going to be friendly to a small village to rock up in a 7,000 passenger ferry.
How could that...
But they don't accept it.
They think that that's because you're an extremist or you've been...
You know, what did he say?
That's what happens if you play Comedy Unleashed.
He thinks that I... I don't think a 7,000 passenger cruise ship suits a small village like, you know, Cinque Terre I was talking about in Italy.
You're an idiot.
Clearly.
It's wild.
No, but it's wild.
You're making up...
You know what you are?
Difficult.
You're making up right-wing...
Far-right, actually.
You're just raising far-right talking points because you are...
You did Comedy Unleashed.
Well, I mean, this is it.
That's you.
It's very odd, and I think you imagine that these labels are going to lose their validity at some point, but they're not going to because people really, really, really don't want to think.
Who was it that said everybody has a natural tendency to want to be a slave, that's our greatest weakness, and our other weakness is wanting stuff.
So basically our desire to not be, to not take responsibility and our desire for things are going to neatly When we're just offered more and more stuff to have less and less responsibility.
It's quite sad.
It was that amazing French guy who said that the bourgeois will give up their liberty to keep their money, and then they'll give up their money to keep their skin, and then they'll be hanged.
Have you read, recently, Samuel, Book of Samuel?
No, I have not read that recently.
Okay, so there's a good bit in this where the children of Israel say, we want a king to tell us, every other country's got a king.
And they've all got king envy.
So they go, we want a king like the other countries.
And God says to Samuel, they really have not got a clue.
Do they not realise that if I give them a king, there are going to be terrible consequences, unforeseen consequences.
Well, they can't foresee.
I can, obviously, because I'm God.
And I can tell you, they're going to rue the day that they ever ask for a king.
So Samuel says, look, I've had a world with God.
And God says, you really don't want a king.
Honestly, you don't.
You're much better off having me, God, as your king.
I'm God.
I can sort things out for you.
You're my chosen people.
And the children of Israel say, yeah, but look, over there, they've got kings.
I want kings.
So God says, okay.
I'll give him a king.
So he gives them...
Saul is their first king.
And anyway, this is the big...
This is exactly...
This goes to what you say.
Well, because people will always be more important of their neighbour than they will be of God.
They always care more about an immediate opinion than...
And that's why this corruption of all opinions as if elevating them or making the noise louder is going to somehow...
Oh, actually, do you know what?
It's very depressing.
Yes.
What, another depressing thing?
Pile them on, why don't you, Tanya?
Well, no, I'm just thinking about...
You want to have some kind of...
You just don't need...
So what is the answer?
Is it Christian anarchy, or is it just everything has to be really small and local and...
What does Christian anarchy look like?
I don't know really.
Just very small groups of collaborating people that work together to make nice things.
I don't want to live on the kibbutz.
I don't want to...
I don't mind...
I think you need hierarchy.
You do need some sort of hierarchy because then everyone has a role to play.
That's just instinctive but natural.
It's certainly true.
You can't make everything level.
This idea of making everything level, I love when they say levelling up.
There's no such thing as levelling up.
That's not what it means.
But you can't...
So there has to be some natural hierarchy.
There is a nature.
There is an our nature.
We're obviously not all equal or where we are.
We have different skills.
You know, one person is more articulate.
One person is more practical.
One person is taller.
One person can...
Yes.
We've got different God-given talents.
Yes.
And you cannot possibly ignore that.
The second you ignore that, somebody has to suffer.
Because the only way you can ignore that is to take something away from somebody that's their gift.
The only way I can pretend that I'm equal to somebody who's obviously superior to me in certain ways is to take away their gift.
And there's only two ways to take it away.
I can stop them using it, or I can denigrate it and pretend it's not a gift.
But I can't possibly bestow their gift on myself.
And also, even merit.
You know, people, if you work really hard on something, people think, oh, that's jolly good.
But no one really respects hard work like they respect natural talent.
They just prefer natural talent, just like they prefer natural beauty.
You're always going to be more attracted to someone that's naturally beautiful than you are to the person that's, you know, done really well going to their yoga classes seven days a week.
You're just instinctively going to like people that can play music By ear.
You're going to think that they're better than the person that can't.
It's normal.
So this whole idea of making things equal is wicked because you can't make things equal.
I've really been thinking about this a lot.
You mentioned orthodoxy earlier.
My Russian friend, she's a classical pianist.
So that's fascinating because to achieve that level, you have to have all of the skills.
So you have to have all of the practice.
You have to have that.
But she also has perfect pitch and natural ability.
And she's exquisitely beautiful.
So...
She's got lots more skills.
I bet she's a handful.
No, she...
Well, yes, yeah, yes, yeah.
I mean, and you've got a man.
I know her husband.
Who am I kidding?
Yes.
She's, well, you just...
He went to the gym, so he was strong enough to carry all her luggage.
Anyway, it's not the point.
Really?
Yeah.
So does she run the show?
Well, he's very successful too, but she's so perfect that...
Well, yes, I mean, I want to do things for her.
But that's not the point.
The point I'm trying to make is that she's got all of the skill and the focus and also all of the talent.
So she's just better than everybody else.
So you can use someone like her to lift yourself up.
She teaches my children, she teaches me the piano.
You can learn from somebody like her.
You can understand things that you never understood before, but you can't possibly have them.
You could never take them from her.
You could only appreciate it.
But I was talking to her about Russian Orthodoxy and she said, The Russian Orthodox Church is supposed to be uncomfortable.
You have to stand there for four hours.
You have to have your head covered.
You have to wear a skirt.
You have to go there with an empty stomach.
You're not allowed to take the Eucharist if you've already eaten.
You're supposed to be uncomfortable.
And she said, you're not allowed to go in there as a woman if you're menstruating, for example, because you're supposed to transcend yourself and they don't believe that you can transcend yourself if you're being weighted down by life.
And also, obviously, you're supposed to be pregnant, aren't you?
So, because they're strict.
You're not, you know, everything is supposed to be traditional.
No sex before marriage, you manage to procreate, etc.
But since she's had her baby, she said that she understands these rituals now because it's about being...
She's stronger and less self-indulgent.
And now that she's had her baby and she's living for another creature instead of for herself, she can see that these different rituals are to try and help the human brain understand something bigger than themselves.
And then we were talking about rituals and I said, all of these things, these rituals and even, you know, her piano practice, etc, etc.
These things for me are to...
If you manage to achieve them.
They're not there.
They're there so that when you have achieved them, when you've mastered them, you're then in a position to go higher, to a different level.
But lots of people seem to be so obsessed with the rituals and the rules that once they have them in place, they think that the only purpose in life is to keep people Attach to those things, is to police those rituals, is to make sure that they don't develop them, that they don't transcend them, that they don't go further than them, that they don't actually create anything, that everything is just maintained.
I really felt like this when that Laura Doddsworth called the police on Bob for the cartoon that she didn't like.
I think that when people, even if they're free speech people or whatever they are, they get to a point where they think, well I've got my speech sorted out now and all we need to do is keep the conversation here and everyone will be safe and my new position will be safe and everything will be okay.
But actually that's not how creative people work.
Creative people make something by channeling something that's That's exterior to them that they have access to.
And Vavara does this when she plays the piano.
She has all of those skills.
She has, you know, she knows how to practice for 10 hours a day.
But then if you saw her perform, she...
It's otherworldly.
And I think that maybe the whole way through, even if you want to really analyse what the Jesuits are doing or what anybody is doing, that I think it's just human nature.
Some people want to stop things moving.
They reach a different point in their lives, but it's in them.
It doesn't matter what age they are or what the job they're in.
They have in their nature this desire to stop things growing.
It just depends when they're happy.
When they get to the point where they're satisfied, that's when they're ready to stop things growing.
But other people, they are never going to stop growing.
And all of the rules and all of the regulations and all of the ways that we learn are for them just the first rung of a ladder that they're trying to ascend to a higher place.
And I think that that's, at the moment, what we're doing or what we're seeing.
It's all of the people that want to stop things, you know, all of the people that just want to freeze the creative people and stop them speaking and stop them thinking and basically the people that want to be slaves, they can preoccupy themselves forever with the administrative task of stopping everybody else, of stopping the creative people, who are always in the minority, by the way.
And what we're seeing, it used to be, or at least we're told that it used to be, that the most gifted person, you know, a Michelangelo, a Titian, we used to think that those people were sponsored, that they had patrons, that they were encouraged to do these incredible otherworldly things that an average person like me wouldn't be able to understand.
And now we're told that everybody's the same and that actually all you need to do to have Michelangelo is to give everybody the same starting life or exactly the same education or exactly the same paints.
But obviously you don't end up with lots of Michelangelos, do you?
You just end up without his work.
No.
You just end up with lots of tampons pinned to a canvas.
It's pointless.
But until we stop being so vain as to think that the only reason we don't have somebody else's gifts is because we haven't had their whatever, their parents, their money, their time, their All of the nastiness now is just our own vanity that's constantly being appealed to by the machine.
The machine just says, oh, you could have done this.
If you stopped them doing it, you could have it.
But it doesn't work like that at all.
But I don't know how you persuade people that they're just useless and they should accept it and be grateful for other things that are better than them because that's not how we're taught now.
We're taught that we're all the same and we're all as good as each other.
We're just not.
And that used to be a wonderful thing to meet people better than you.
It used to be a joy and a privilege.
And now it's a source of irritation and it's really...
that's the problem.
I think Tonya, What we've established in your meandering but provocative way is that when we emerge into our perfect world that God always wanted for us and we denied ourselves through our frailties and stupidity and so on,
And our refusal to kill all the bulls and the sheep when he orders to kill them all, not spare any of the livestock.
That it's not going to be like living on a kibbutz or in one of those...
Those big houses on Exmoor.
What are they called?
A collective.
Where people sort of argue about whose shelf on the fridge belongs to whom.
All these communes.
Communes.
It's not going to be like that.
Because...
Communes are ultimately about power plays, aren't they?
There's going to be bossy people and not bossy people and sticklers and so on and it will be really tiresome after a time.
I don't believe that's the idea.
All of human nature but without any escape.
This is the ridiculous thing about these things.
You can't suddenly make everybody good by sticking them together With the same, you know, tools.
Whereas, might I propose as our perfect world?
Like, you came to my event the other day with Dick and 220, just the loveliest people.
And when you hang out with our people, There's no sense of chippiness or resentment.
Nobody's going...
For example, with me, nobody's going, why should I support somebody who just is flaky and just chats a lot on podcasts?
And then he goes, his spare time, when he can get it together, he goes fox hunting.
This layabout, he's not a productive member of society.
He's not...
With his privilege.
None of our people say this.
They just go, oh, it's just James doing...
And we quite like it.
I feel the same...
The generosity I get.
I got...
Some people bought me.
Some brought for me.
Some honey.
Some...
Butter made with raw milk.
Lovely.
Some raw milk.
So they bring me nice, meaningful, lovely things that make me happy.
And I look at all the people in the room and I think, yeah, you're great.
And so, okay, some of them do things like they run small holdings.
I know that the people who run small holdings in our perfect world would not be going well.
I've got myself all these vegetable growing skills and I'm damned if I'm going to share my vegetables with anybody else because I'm Mr. Special Vegetable Grower.
They're not like that.
They're going to be going, yeah, have some of my vegetables.
Obviously, you don't want to brag too much about your own vegetables, but I think that people, the important thing, James, is that people recognize, oh, wow, that person is good at growing vegetables, and I would like some of those vegetables because they're better than those other things.
Or, I want to listen to James because he's a character and he's more interesting than, you know, my husband or my cousin or whoever it is irritating you.
People just recognize that they have different skills to each other.
And I don't think that that's a problem.
And what's happening with the whole automization of everything, including the mind, Is that we used to be, you know, you used to have tools and you'd have tools so that you could use the tools.
It was a way of you making something.
And now everything's been replaced so that it's just your only participation in things now is supposed to be what you're consuming or what you're There's no relationship anymore between how people are living and what they're...
There's no connection.
And I think when you go to something like your event, well, for a start, people have actually made things.
You know, they know each other.
They're sharing things.
They're not...
They're interacting.
They're talking.
They're not...
Someone who wants to have butter with raw milk.
It's not because they've been subjected to some campaign and that's going to...
Suddenly make them healthy or younger or save the world.
It's because they know that it's obviously better to have something that's fresher.
But this is just about getting closer to the basics.
I don't know why.
When did it become so complicated?
My son was told the other day by someone I don't agree with that the reason for pasteurizing is because my son really loved the raw milk he was given.
And my other son, who's lactose intolerant and vomits if he has milk, could drink raw milk without being sick.
So it's quite clear that it's better for you if you can...
Because I said I've heard that it won't make him sick and I experiment on him at your kitchen table and my friend said yes.
So my son drank this raw milk and he was absolutely fine.
So my other son has decided that raw milk is the greatest thing.
He's a new man since he tasted this raw milk.
And he was told that actually pasteurization was because raw milk used to kill people.
I don't know why someone would say this to my son and he was so happy about raw milk.
But anyway.
What was interesting is that I was trying to think of a way to Demonstrate that this was untrue without being difficult.
And I said, well, Newcastle Brown Ale, that's pasteurised to travel to America, but it's not pasteurised here.
I don't think it's pasteurised here.
It might be pasteurised here now.
But anyway, whatever.
If it is pasteurised here, I lied.
The point is, as I said, it's not pasteurised here because it doesn't have to travel far.
The pasteurisation is just to increase the shelf life.
Now, my son understood that.
And I said, obviously, if you didn't pasteurize it, you wouldn't be able to drink it for as long, but you would be able to smell that so you wouldn't poison yourself and die.
But I thought, people are insane and they can't...
Why would you not want a child to have raw milk?
Why would you want everything to be...
You know, why do you think everything has to be altered?
That the human blood has to be altered?
Because...
It makes so much money, that's why.
Illuminati, paedophile, freemason, Louis Pasteur, was chosen by the dark rulers to push this...
Shit!
It's how it goes.
Do you know what they...
I've been handing out Bob's books to all my friends, I mean the people in my area.
Your normal friends?
Well, normal friends can pay for it, but Abdul the Dry Cleaner, who I had all my really intense conversations with for about two years when I was having a nervous breakdown, he's got a copy and the Thuy, the Vietnamese lady in the nail salon, who declined the Covid vaccine when she was pregnant.
She's totally on board.
They don't do this shit in the Vietnamese culture.
She's got a copy.
And my babysitter from Bulgaria, she's got a copy.
And all of these people, none of them took this stuff.
And none of them believe any of this rubbish.
And I think that that's really fun and positive and optimistic, is that this, we have to remember, is a bourgeois middle-class psychosis.
It really does not affect the people that look for themselves or that work or that have any connection at all to their own culture.
So...
My friend, she didn't have a fridge when she was younger because they just picked everything.
You know, they milked the cow, they drank the milk, they picked the fruit, they ate the fruit.
And she said she can't say to people now that she didn't have a fridge because they think that she was impoverished or backwards.
But actually, she was just healthy and everything was fresh.
But all of these people, they exist, they're everywhere, and they understand their culture, they understand their religion, they understand their bodies.
They look at this stuff like it's insane, not from our black-pilled or red-pilled perspective, but just from a practical thing.
They can just see it's obviously nicer to pick an apple from the tree.
They're not overanalyzing it.
And the people that are starting to analyse things are really doing it in quite a simple way.
So I sent my friend a load of books because she was worried about vaccinating her baby.
And I said to her, listen, just read the ingredients list.
This is what Anna's always saying.
Just read the ingredients list.
Anyway, she kept trying to read all these books and in the end she just read the ingredients list and she had it translated for her mother who had spoken to 10 independent doctors because her mother was an anti-vaxxer who now is so panic-stricken about her grandson that she suddenly started seeking medical advice from professionals which is obviously the worst thing you could possibly do.
Yes.
And so all of these doctors have said, oh no he must be vaccinated and then My friend translated the ingredients list and sent it to the mother, and the mother called her up weeping.
Don't put this in your child!
So I think most of this stuff is actually going to be very, very simple.
We're constantly trying to articulate it or express it to people, but it's all going to come down to very simple, visible stuff.
Just...
I don't think that the...
I also think it's got to be...
I'm surprised by how many of us are attached to the idea that they are ever going to win By having a story come round to their side.
So it's like my friend who really, I thought, was a politically astute commentator.
He was so excited about the story of the American elections and the Trump victory.
He said at one point, come on, can't you see?
This is like your favourite characters in a TV show.
Can't you see?
I wrote a message to him.
I said, but it is your favourite characters in a TV show, isn't it?
So how can you not?
How can you be upset that not everybody's buying into it?
I do think that there needs to be a massive turning away from the story machine, and I don't think our side is ready for that.
I think that our side is just desperate to win one argument one Christmas ever, and they are making a mistake.
But I think that the way out is just going to be really obvious, simple stuff.
I think I probably got it wrong trying to win my way with reading studies or showing that I was smarter than somebody.
I think it just needs to be really basic.
This tastes better than that.
And also, what is interesting is, well, this is sad, really, but even my father, did I tell you, he's declined vaccines 9 and 10. That's a win.
That's a win.
Yeah, so technically he's an anti-vaccine now, and whether he admits it or not.
And I do think that, well, firstly, because a lot of people are sadly dying or getting very sick, I think that people are noticing that things...
I went to Ireland!
James, for this comedy festival because the amazing Aidan McKillick, someone's trying to cancel him because someone who now thinks that they're a woman has gone through his old Twitter and apparently he likes something, a joke that they found transphobic or whatever.
Anyway, they tried to have his festival cancelled and I got a message from him saying, would I help?
And I said yes, before I even knew what he did because it wasn't really relevant.
You know, I like this man.
So I called him up and said, but I need to tell you what I did.
I said, no, you don't.
It's fine.
I don't care.
I'll just come and do the show.
And he said, no, what's happened is I liked a couple of tweets, apparently, a year ago.
And I said, listen, if I went through not what you want someone...
First thing, I don't care what you said.
I don't care if you said something I disagreed with.
I don't care.
I don't care if you haven't changed your mind about something I disagreed with.
I'm still not interested.
I said, but if I was going to go through the tweets that somebody had liked.
Likes!
The comments someone had liked.
Yeah, of course.
I would A be insane and I'd never leave the house again because I'd be too busy scrolling, doom scrolling.
And he said, well, no, it's different because these actresses, you know, they're worried about, these performers are worried about losing acting jobs or whatever.
It's always women, by the way.
Women are not helping the situation.
We should never have been allowed out of the house.
No.
And he said, well, they're just worried about losing work.
And I said, well, you can't.
It's not good enough to say that they're worried about losing work.
Everybody has to stand up together now and just say, this is not on.
I don't care.
I'm not going to look.
I believe in people being able to have an opinion.
I like characters.
I actually like people I don't agree with.
Anyway, the point is, I went to this festival in Ireland.
It was absolutely amazing.
It was really, really good fun.
And a friend of mine from school, and this I told you about this woman before, she's the one that had liked this comment that a comedian had made about when she was finally allowed out of the house, when she was finally allowed to touch people again, when she could finally take off her mask and take her vaccine.
And I had written to my friend and said, this is a lie.
This person's very amusing.
I know she is because I was drinking with her at a lock-in till one o'clock this morning, but she just gigged to 400 people.
She's not wearing a mask.
She's not waiting for a vaccine.
She's certainly not waiting to be touched.
Or to touch anyone again.
This is a crock of shit.
And she said, actually, sure, why would she do that?
Anyway, she just didn't get it.
So the point is, she came to my show and she brought her parents, who I hadn't seen for ever.
And they were so emotional.
It was also nice.
Anyway, the point is, we had a drink afterwards.
Ten.
And she said to me, she said, you tried to warn me and I didn't listen.
But at least I didn't vaccinate my children.
And she said her friend vaccinated her daughter, 13 years old, now has myocarditis.
And she said her friend, who's a marathon runner, 42 years old, now has myocarditis.
And she said, so you tried to warn me and I didn't listen, but you were right.
Now, no one wants to be right on anything like that.
But what was so curious is that her friend was there, and her friend wouldn't accept that.
She absolutely is adamantly pro-vaccine.
So I thought, well, that's so curious because they know the same people.
They know the same stories.
They're both vaccinated.
One person has had a moment where they've gone, shit, thank God I at least didn't poison my kids.
And the other person has doubled down the other way that they can't be connected.
But a lot of people are...
As seeing that, you know, it's not all as they thought.
And even if at a basic level, that means that a few people don't suck up everything they read on Instagram, that would already be a huge improvement.
And also, this is so interesting.
Firstly, what you make...
I love it when you rag your pen at me.
Oh, sorry.
No, it's good.
I meant it.
I like you ragging your pen at me.
But I was thinking, what you make and who you are are different things.
You could make something lovely and be a bad person or you could be a good person and make rubbish.
And what social media has done is conflate the two things and really it's just someone who is adequately creating a character.
That it's them.
And what they produce has become secondary.
People don't have the attention span for it.
It's a bit like people writing about Sarman Rushdie because they didn't have the strength to read any of his books.
So they all just wrote little articles on whether or not he should be banned.
And they all secretly hoped that he might be banned so that they didn't have to get through the satanic verses.
And it was just a shortcut.
And the whole idea of social media really is just accelerating that process so that you don't even actually have to read anything someone's done now.
You can just look at a picture of them, you know, taking a selfie or having some surgery.
And so our attention is getting shorter and shorter and shorter.
Yeah, maybe we just need to grow our attention and eat fresh things.
I don't know, James.
I'm in such a good mood.
I know that the world's over, but it's Christmas and the songs are so lovely and I've got a beautiful tree.
What's your favourite Christmas carol?
Oh, I have so many.
In the Bleak Midwinter.
Do you?
I love.
I love In the Peter Twins.
And I love Come All You Faithful.
We had that one.
Oh, isn't it nice?
At our carol service.
Yeah.
And you don't often get to sing it.
If you make the mistake of only going to the Christmas Day service, by then you've missed the boat.
You get Hark the Herald Angels singing.
Oh, I love it.
And I love Oh Come All You Faithful.
And I love Holy Night.
I love Silent Night.
Oh, oh, I love them all.
I really love carols.
Even though you can't, obviously you can't reach the vocal range required to hit all the notes and all the carols is impossible.
You have to skip out some of the high notes or the low notes.
Do you know, I actually go to the church I go to, they do a sung service.
The service is, you sing the service.
Really?
Yeah, it's a beautiful church.
It's totally OTT. They've got Christ as King.
It's in Pimlico.
It's the most beautiful church.
The churches are all lovely.
The other church, you can hear the trains come underneath, and they've got an incredible choir.
But the point is, you can be inoffensive with your voice if you...
I was in Pimlico today.
Oh!
Why were you in Pimlico?
I love Pimlico.
Did you go to that French place?
That's my favourite restaurant.
Oh, that one.
You know that St Barnabas Church?
You know the triangle?
Yeah.
I'm talking about Pimlico Road.
I'm talking about Pimlico Road.
Yeah, I know the triangle.
What's it called?
The restaurant?
The French restaurant.
La Poulapour.
I can't remember.
Yeah, there's Poulapour.
Is there a church behind it?
Yes, opposite.
That's my church.
And it's really over the top.
It's really...
Theoretically, what denomination is it?
It's Anglican, and I go there because it's so beautiful.
It's absolutely beautiful.
It's the most beautiful, magical place.
So, you know when I went on my year of crying in churches, and then...
I used to live in Pimlico.
I went to different churches around here in North London, but one of them I left because they were praying to the vaccine.
What the hell?
I left.
I walked out with my children.
And then I went to this other one, but it was too ugly.
And so then I ended up going back to this church, St Barnabas, and it's the most exquisite church ever.
And I love everybody there.
And then afterwards, my sons collect the hymn books and stuff.
And we all eat chocolate biscuits.
It's the opposite of my Orthodox friends.
What time is it?
I go at 10 o'clock on a Sunday.
I don't go there every week because I'm not very good.
I also have to get a train there.
If ever I'm...
I used to go to Chelsea Old Church because that's how grand I am.
But if ever I'm in London around that area, unlikely, but it sounds good.
Oh yes, we should go together.
Honestly.
Yeah, well exactly.
You love it.
I'll sing very quietly.
I'll put my children between us so you don't have to hear my voice ruining everything.
I haven't got a beautiful voice.
They burn the incense and it's all really dramatic and wonderful.
So are the priests all gay?
Yes.
Yeah, of course they are.
High Church Anglican is about as gay as it gets, isn't it?
Yeah, I mean...
Nothing wrong with that, necessarily.
I don't think it's...
Well, I mean, it's not a secret.
No, I don't.
They tend not to, in my experience, they tend not to make it a secret.
And they tend to be good on all the, well, obviously all the smells and bells and rituals stuff.
Well, you had a stand-in trainee female woman, you know, a person that's training.
I don't know all the language because I've come to this so late and I make mistakes on the terms.
But anyway, so she's training to be a...
You know, the priest.
And she said one day, stand up, and she added in, if you are able.
And I was so coarse about that, because it wasn't as if everyone was sitting there thinking, oh, you've got to stand up if you're physically incapable of it.
She put it in to be To show off.
To show off about being nice.
She was so vain.
She couldn't even stick to the service.
She had to make it.
She had to put her own personality into it.
And I was so cross.
I said to Father John afterwards, I said, why did she say that?
Christ, and I'm not up to date on the Bible like you, James.
But I said, Christ said, pick up your pallet and walk.
Not, oh, are you able?
It's just the opposite.
And what did he say?
He said, yes, that's a fair point.
I never heard her say it again.
Good.
I hope he chastised her with his tongue.
Well, I don't think he would have chastised her because they're all so nice, aren't they?
But...
No, no, this is a point I was going to make.
I was going to say, the upside of the High Anglicans is that you get all the smells and bells and ceremony and respect for the liturgy and so on, although it is a bit popish.
But you quite often get with that...
Extreme wokery.
So, for example, there's a similar institution in Camberwell, attended by a friend of mine, where I used to live actually, so I know this church, where they really, even though they're all white, they really don't like you.
If you're white and middle class, you are very much a second, if not third class citizen in their eyes.
They're very, very aggressively woke.
And it's almost as though they don't really like heterosexuals either.
Well, this woman, very nice woman in the congregation at the church I go to, she was saying to me how she chose not to retire to Sussex because everyone there is white and very, you know, racist.
She is white, by the way.
And I said, well, because I do find it offensive that somebody that's attached to their own cultural tradition is somehow racist.
You know, I'm in a mixed marriage.
I suggest that my mother-in-law's attachment to her own culture is racist.
It's not racist.
It's preferential.
She absolutely prefers her culture to mine.
That's her clear, public, open, avowed preference.
And I think that this stuff where you're saying someone's racist, what you're actually saying is that you're not supposed to notice.
So I believe in noticing differences.
You can't write if you don't believe in noticing difference.
I believe in noticing differences and when I notice differences, I choose between them.
That's called discrimination and it's a good thing.
It's a positive thing.
But I had this chat with this woman and she was thinking about it and I hadn't been for quite a while because it had been the holidays and Anyway, she'd been thinking about this a lot and I asked, I told her to watch the show, you know, the show, Bob's show, Artpocalypse, because obviously I still want people to watch that.
And she came back, this lady, and she's, you know, she's much, much older.
She must be 65, 70. And she watched the show and she said it was very interesting to see something from a completely different perspective.
She's obviously jabbed up to the max and she's a mega normie and had no idea that anybody felt like that about anything.
She had no idea that there was ever a different perspective on the last few years.
And tell me this, James.
I wasn't nice.
This is the second time it's happened.
Somebody apologized to me the other day because their vaccine injured and so they realized that they knew that I was anti-vax and they were very pro-vax.
And I ran my mouth off, not in a mean way, but I started explaining, you know, It was just that it was immoral.
And I did the same thing to this woman.
I said, well, yes, it was a moral choice, wasn't it?
And I could have just shut up, let her have a chat, and said, thank you.
That's very kind.
I'm glad that you watched that.
I hope you enjoyed it.
Why couldn't I do that?
Why, when people actually come round and say, oh, maybe I was wrong about that, why can't I float off like an angel and just, you know, be one of those people that says, you know...
Well, because we're all sinners.
Yeah, fuck.
So annoying.
Unfortunately.
Even I, Tonya, even I am susceptible to stupid things that I regret afterwards.
I just want to...
When this man said to me that he needed to apologise, which he doesn't, by the way, but after I talked too much then, I promised myself that the next time someone did this and said...
Actually, I did it in Ireland.
I did it, James.
When my friend said that she didn't listen, I didn't bang on and say, no, you didn't.
I... I thought I was drinking a lot of Guinness and I probably just didn't care.
Do you know, I had this weird experience, a very weird experience at this...
I went to this dinner party.
I was about to describe it as a normie dinner party, but almost by definition, any dinner party is normie.
Because, you know, you're always going to be...
Unless it's kind of the James Dellingpole tinfoil hat dinner party.
It's going to be, isn't it?
Yes.
The majority of...
Yeah.
So I was at this and it was big.
It was like 20 people.
Lovely.
Our hostess introduced me to this guy saying, do you know so-and-so?
I said, well, we sort of waved at each other from the other side of the table.
We haven't spoken.
She said, well, James is a TV critic.
And you might be interested in that because he had this very, very high-powered job at the BBC. I won't specify because I don't want to speak out of turn.
And my instinct, the moment I discovered this, was to...
Get myself into trouble by saying, yeah, well, of course, the BBC is a communist organisation.
It's basically the deep stage.
I hate it and everything it does.
But I didn't because I didn't have time to get in my kind of self-sabotage thing because he started talking before I could self-sabotage.
And it turned out he was a really delightful, interesting character.
He had some interesting points of view, which weren't inimical to anything that I thought.
And I thought, you so nearly ruined this conversation, James, because you're always just like, you know, mouthing off and getting yourself into trouble because it's fun and it's naughty.
And actually...
This guy gave you a chance because he spoke before you and you had a really interesting conversation that you'd never have had.
This is going to be my New Year's resolution, James.
It's going to be my New Year's resolution.
I'm going to pace myself.
I've got to go.
You've got to go.
You've got to go.
Look at the time.
Go.
Do you want to advertise anything?
Oh!
Oh!
Buy Bob's book, obviously.
Give it to everybody at Christmas.
Beautiful, beautiful book.
And also, Alistair Williams and I, Alistair Williams and I, we're going to do these shows again.
And we've got another one in March.
And they always send out, please come, because after we go to the pub.
Actually, James, please, why don't you come?
March 8th, it's a Saturday.
Everyone goes to the pub afterwards.
It's really good fun.
It's all our life.
March the 8th.
Yeah.
March the 8th.
Well, we've got one this Saturday, but we've sold that one out.
Yeah, but you've sold out.
Will you put the details?
Yes, yes, it'll be...
Alistair will have it out.
I'll have it out.
It's the Top Secret Comedy Club.
And these are our shows.
It's at 5pm.
We just split the bill.
We always do new stuff.
And then after, we all go and drink and have a nice catch-up.
That's a good time.
It's a good time.
If I were in London, that would not be too inconvenient.
Yeah.
And my substack.
James, my substack, because my other resolution is going to be to write my substack next year, and I'm going to start putting good things on it.
So yes.
Do that.
Yeah.
Definitely put some good things on your substack.
Thank you.
Okay.
Thank you so much.
Go and get your kids.
Yes, and have your kids.
And I'll just do...
Yeah.
Oh, hold on, have you uploaded?
No, no, I'm going to plug in.
As soon as you switch off, I'm going to plug in, but I've got to run.
So I'll just leave it off.
You've just got to leave your computer on.
Okay, fine.
So...
Okay, go, go.
Bye.
I'll just say goodbye to my people.
While Tanya goes off to collect her children, who have probably been kidnapped by and sold into slavery by now, and that would be really awful.
Evil Tanya.
Anyway, I hope you've enjoyed this podcast, despite the traumatic ending.
And if you like my stuff, support me.
You can get early access to my podcast if you subscribe to Substack or Locals or Patreon or subscribe stuff.
If you don't want to do that, Local.
Buy me a coffee.
That would be nice.
Support my sponsors.
But yeah, I love the people who...
I mean, I love you all, obviously, but I do love especially the ones who can just put their...
You know, when they've got skin in the game, they're actually prepared to invest.
