Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - COPS AND ROBBER - EP106 COP EMAIL SPECIAL

March 7, 2025 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes

02:04:49

COPS AND ROBBER - EP106 COP EMAIL SPECIAL

We went through the emails this week and spent way too much time on crazy racist Karens who are great at talking their way into an arrest. Then we take calls and the phones actually work!

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	Sorry, that's that was the Icky Boys.
	San Francisco band from the late 80s, early 90s.
	That was their hit.
	What's that song called?
	What is that called?
	Kill Some Pigs?
	Pigs.
	It's just called Pigs.
	They were a popular indie bunch of slackers.
	Stars of the incredible film I'm Not Fascinating, which came out around then, late 80s, early 90s.
	You look at it and you go, wow, did the shit we watch in the 80s ever suck?
	They should have just filmed guys hanging out because every student filmed from back then looked like shit.
	Welcome to the weekly free episode.
	We mix it up.
	Sometimes it's the casual Monday show.
	Sometimes it's serious Tuesday show.
	Sometimes it's the compound censored, me and Ant on Wednesdays.
	Sometimes it's Friday with the God Wheel, where we spin a wheel and let God decide what the subjects are.
	But tonight we are with the cops.
	We have Lieutenant Ron.
	We've got Stiggs.
	We've got Big John.
	And of course, we have our resident felon, Mr. Matthew O'Dell.
	He's looking really dark despite us working on the lighting for about 20 minutes before we saw him.
	Now he looks like a boll weevil who was caught under a car, a British car, like an Austin Mini.
	Nice.
	So we'll try to fix that.
	That's disappointing.
	But maybe that's just my monitor.
	Maybe.
	Are we live?
	We're live not just on censored.tv, compoundcensored.com, compoundmedia.com.
	We are also live on Twitter.
	Oh, great.
	And Rumble, I assume, right, Sean?
	I'm working on Rumble.
	Working on Rumble.
	Okay.
	Pretty sure I made it clear earlier in the week that the free show was supposed to be on Rumble and Twitter.
	And you don't...
	If we're not at the beginning, it's not really...
	Yeah, I guess so.
	Yeah.
	Today's episode is brought to you by Nita Fashions.
	Nita Fashions is my personal tailor.
	You'll notice I usually wear a suit on the show, and I'm wearing Nita Fashions every day.
	Every shirt, every suit, custom-made.
	And what they do is they go on tour, and they do these fittings.
	If you check their schedule, you can see that.
	Dude, you're really fucking up today.
	We don't want to see your entire monitor and all your anime porn bookmarks.
	So you can see their schedule.
	You can't now for some strange reason.
	This is they're on Instagram, nita.fashions, N-I-T-A.
	But we're going to do an experiment this tour.
	I'm going to go with them.
	So I'll be going to DC to New.
	Well, I'll be going to New York.
	I'll be taking the train a few stops down.
	Boston and New Jersey.
	So you can book now info at nitafashions.com or Instagram at nita.fashions.
	If you're near DC, Boston, New York, or the Hilton Short Hills Hotel in New Jersey, you can contact them and get the exact locations.
	But they go in there, they fit you.
	You end up with a free shirt.
	You go, you get tons of booze there.
	And you're permanently invited to all censored events for free, lifetime membership.
	So there's a lot of pluses for the $200.
	A lot of pluses.
	So, Sean, you've got two things to work on while you're doing the show.
	Yep.
	Oh, we got some mail here.
	Let's check that out.
	Pull up my P.O. box.
	Oh, I hope that's a fucking bomb.
	Well, if it's a bomb, you're going to be fine.
	You're way the fuck over there.
	No, that's why I'm hoping it is.
	It's just pretty interesting to be.
	Stakes got me a new hat today.
	This doesn't look like the authentic hats.
	It's a pig pussy hat.
	I understand I'm familiar with the big pussy hats, but, um...
	They're usually more like this.
	This is from fucking Amazon.
	I'm sorry you don't like it.
	Take it off.
	I thought you'd enjoy it.
	So you bought this for me.
	You went shopping.
	No, no, I bought it a few years ago.
	I just happened to see it in my car when I was getting out the booth.
	This is a baby monster.
	Has sent me a wonderful gift that appears to be some sort of an Irish party shirt.
	You can tell by the feel of the fabric.
	It's very cheap fabric.
	So thank you, John.
	But you didn't exactly break the bank with that one.
	That feels like it's made of plastic.
	What an ungrateful fucking guy is.
	Quebec.
	Holy fuck.
	I'd rather just not have a shirt if you're going to send such a cheap one.
	Give it to me.
	I'll wear it when I work on St. Patty's Day.
	Okay.
	And this one is from a guy in Canada.
	Seems to be a piece of paper.
	Let's see what this is.
	We're live on Rumble.
	I enjoy you on tax.
	I was very pleased to learn there'll be a new booth boy.
	Perhaps this will encourage more folks to watch your show.
	Continue success.
	Yours sincerely.
	What the fuck is this?
	So his name's Donald.
	Hope you enjoy my stories.
	Today I've not made a dime.
	And then he has photocopied color articles of, I guess, him.
	Yeah, this is him reliving childhood memories of a favorite local amusement park.
	Holy shit.
	And we have a rock and tribute, another article he wrote in Windsor, Ontario.
	That's the one touching Detroit.
	And it's just him looking at the B-29 Superfortress, which I guess is at some sort of flying museum or something.
	What was the local park?
	Was it Canada's Wonderland?
	Of course, that's an American plane.
	That's what they dropped on fucking the bomb on Hiroshima from.
	In the future, guys, just send me a link, or you could send these as attachments in an email.
	Was it Canada's Wonderland?
	Who sent what?
	The last thing?
	No, the amusement park.
	No, the amusement park?
	Southern Ontario, across from an amusement park in the middle of Detroit River, was an interesting childhood.
	Many local kids worked in blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
	That's a mental patient.
	That's the kind of guy who's going to kill me, by the way.
	So thought that counsel.
	So, um, well, that's two different guys.
	The first guy sent the cheap shirt, and then the second guy sent me photocopies of his color copies of his various articles.
	Okay, so we're on Rumble.
	We're on Twitter, right?
	Yep.
	And then our only remaining problem before we start the show is, of course, Maddie looking like a lost mouse.
	Yeah, my stomach.
	The mouse that time forgot.
	It looks like the camera's adding a few pounds too.
	Oh, okay.
	So it's, you know, kind of how I was like, all the time.
	We're going back to that?
	Yeah.
	They increased it.
	They doubled it.
	I got to say, I fucking love watching you try to drink a beer when you're on Ozempic.
	It is one of the funniest things.
	I don't understand why watching your friends dry heave is so hilarious.
	Yeah, it's my stomach's been screwed up the last two days.
	Okay, let's start the show.
	And hopefully the Maddie problem can be resolved while Sean does other things.
	But it's not going to be easy, Sean.
	So there's a lot of links here.
	I had a fun idea today.
	Let's just catch up on cop emails.
	Usually we do normal cop videos.
	We do female cops.
	We do calls.
	We'll do calls still.
	But I want to catch up on cop emails first.
	I think we should devote the entire show to it.
	You get a lot of variety, you see.
	Agreed?
	Yeah.
	Sure.
	Okay.
	Great.
	Go.
	Go.
	Now, now you'll have to change the background, I guess, to cop emails.
	Right?
	Yep.
	Is that cop emails?
	Yeah.
	It's not as pretty as the other one, but whatever.
	So, of course, this has been sent to me one billion times.
	I'm sure you got, I think it's in our chat, but we would be remiss if we were not to include it today.
	Some fucking Mexican goes to smoke mess on the job, and he folds like a deck chair.
	Everyone's seen this, right?
	Yes.
	Why are you guys being so serious?
	I didn't watch the video, but I saw the link.
	It's pretty funny.
	It is pretty funny.
	Okay, wait a minute.
	I can't do the show with this.
	Grey of vision on fucking Maddie.
	Maybe the monitor that's in the bar is not reliable?
	That could be something like that.
	Because we had it perfect using that monitor.
	Yeah.
	And now it couldn't be worse.
	What are you doing?
	I'm adjusting it on here.
	Well, show us.
	We might as well.
	Terrible.
	Put the light back on.
	Yeah, Gavin, you had the light back on when you were.
	No, I adjusted it without the light.
	I mean, I could turn the light on, but I don't think that's a good look, though.
	Do we really want to see Matt's face that much?
	Yeah.
	You love it.
	Yeah, that's fine.
	Oh, now he looks like he's 150 and fat.
	You're going to see the cockroaches running around the bottle.
	His hair looks cooler.
	Oh yeah.
	His hair looks cool, but um, It's still problematic.
	Yeah.
	It's washed out.
	I can try working on it behind the scenes here.
	Well, just work on it now.
	How hard is it to adjust brightness and contrast?
	Oh, that's what I've been doing.
	Well, we're not seeing shit.
	Oh, no, you had it better.
	That sucks.
	How it's brighter.
	Getting better.
	Getting better.
	Go slowly.
	Get it nice.
	You get the brightness to the part where we can see him.
	And then you just kick in the contrast.
	Very simple here.
	And your settings should have been recorded from it.
	This all should have been done in advance, Sean.
	You had all day today.
	I know.
	I was working on it.
	He was probably too busy cleaning that room over there.
	It looks fucking immaculate.
	Yeah.
	That was a really pathetic job of cleaning your little studio space there.
	Oh, yeah, I know.
	I'm not done.
	You're not.
	What are you doing all the time?
	A lot of work and stuff on this show.
	Okay.
	So we're told.
	So, yeah, this was sent in by a guy named Roger who sends way too much shit in.
	But he calls this Do the Flop, Do the Flop.
	And it's well narrated.
	So Stiggs here has retired.
	He could be doing all the Coke he wants.
	No one's testing his blood anymore.
	But you said you don't want to do it because you know you'll do your first thing.
	And I'm not so much worried about dying.
	I'm worried about having my friends shit on me in a group chat after I'm deceased.
	Yeah, that would be an embarrassing chat with this, too.
	I can't trust you guys not to fucking shit on me after I've died a miserable death.
	If you die of fentanyl, you'll be like, fuck that guy.
	Yeah, exactly.
	Everyone's going to think I'm a fucking junkie and a shithead.
	And I can't go like that.
	We have a group chat without you.
	You should read that.
	That's a lot of fun.
	What's an Alki?
	Without you.
	Oh, really?
	Douchebag.
	It's called the Douchebag Free Zone.
	Okay, so check this out.
	The audio explains everything.
	Of October 24th, 2023, Sacramento County Sheriff's Deputy Marvin Morales entered the restroom at the Central Division office on the 700 block of 65th Street in Sacramento, California.
	Now, before you go thinking, what's the issue here?
	Surely he's just gone to take a leak.
	Well, let me just stop you for a moment.
	You see, to put it bluntly, Deputy Morales had an issue with meth.
	And believe it or not, he was going to the bathroom to smoke that.
	Yes, in the sheriff's office.
	But the thing was, this latest batch of meth was laced with fentanyl.
	This is a sign of affirmative action.
	If you need to do meth to do your job.
	Why does he have his body camera on in the bathroom?
	That's a good question.
	Wait, doesn't it automatically go on and then go back 30 minutes or something?
	It goes back 30 seconds, at least ours does, before the sound kicks on.
	So he walked in and saw him.
	No, he had it on before he walked in.
	No, he doesn't.
	No, but it retroactively activates.
	It records for 30 seconds until you hit the button, and then it starts recording sound from that moment.
	But there's 30 seconds in the past.
	How does he know to go to the car and get an arcane?
	Yes.
	He knows he's a fucking crackhead?
	He just must.
	And also, when you're folded like that, that's not like how you go when you have a heart attack.
	That would be the last thing I was thinking.
	Really?
	Well, I'd be like, oh, do you see the way he's shaped?
	Unless he saw drugs on the floor.
	He didn't even go and shake him at all.
	Yeah, that's not a fucking...
	I had a heart attack fucking.
	That's like what happens when you're shot in the head.
	He just turned his camera on right there.
	Why are you turning your fucking camera on?
	Well, you really got to protect this guy, to be honest with me.
	He's got something in his hand.
	What is that?
	Fucking lighter.
	Pipe?
	Smoke and metal.
	You guys have a North Carolina?
	No.
	I would let you die.
	It fucking brings him right back.
	He probably had a lot, so I hit him twice.
	I like when they get mad when they get revived and they want to fight you.
	Fight as me!
	Yep.
	They come at a fucking deck.
	They have no idea what's going on.
	Hey, get the shit on me.
	I don't have a safe thing, sir.
	What?
	They must know that Morales does meth.
	Hey, drag him out.
	Meth head Morales.
	Drake him out.
	They probably all do.
	Hey, first, Northcans, the flight are ready.
	Good job, guy.
	I don't see it.
	Is that a crack fit there?
	With your mid.
	Matt, but his maddy now.
	He missed Fritz.
	Why are you watching your phone?
	He just had his finger in his ass.
	The guy's adrenaline is fucking pounding.
	zoom patrol Alright, I think it gets boring after that.
	Now, do they just let him go back on patroling?
	What did they do?
	I collected the glass pipe and secured it in my patrol vehicle due to the fragile state of the glass pipe to avoid breaking it.
	I took a photograph of it with my department-issued iPhone as I would be using this photograph as evidence.
	I later safely disposed of the glass pipe at the Central Area Station.
	Did they call it this guy?
	You threw evidence away?
	It's false.
	How's it now?
	Still not breathing?
	Not breathing.
	He's talking.
	What's he dead?
	He just said, I'm breathing.
	It brings you out a few seconds.
	It happens real quick.
	okay jump ahead to 9 15.
	In the hours before the overdose, Deputy Morales and another officer responded to a suspicious person call at the show gas station on Stockton Boulevard.
	When they arrived, they came face to face with said suspicious person, an Asian male.
	This hadn't been the first time the man had crossed paths with police.
	In fact, Deputy Morales had personally spoken with him many times in the past.
	On this occasion, the officers believed that the man had been under the influence, and when they saw foil hanging out of his pocket, it backed those claims further.
	You having a lot of fun out here, bro?
	That's Morales talking.
	Yeah, I need to say that.
	Morales must have stolen his drugs.
	You know something?
	He might have been stealing it all along.
	They probably gave him a dog.
	What is it again?
	Oh, yeah.
	They're sick of getting robbed.
	He was dancing together.
	They gave him a death dose.
	You.
	Yeah, you found it through your death best back.
	Yeah, yeah, definitely.
	Turn it up.
	No way too for me.
	Last time I went to the stadium was about to pass out the other night, though.
	You was on the fetty.
	Oh, yeah.
	Yeah.
	All right, that's boy.
	Is that what that boil is right there?
	Be real with it.
	Just be real.
	You do match.
	Yeah, yeah.
	Could be.
	I don't think I know.
	I think it is.
	No, I didn't know what he met those pops.
	It's one thing to go on negation and get fucked up.
	I don't think you do it.
	Oh, you're working.
	Yeah, and you're fucking.
	I mean, I received it in the bathroom.
	They have sold it twice.
	I respect his gangster.
	Just not giving the fucking work.
	We hit it, bro.
	I'm giving you the chance just to hand it over.
	All right, let's jump to the next one.
	This would usually be under the category of female cops, but it was sent to me a hundred times too.
	Some of these videos, I just got to get out of my system so you'll stop sending them to me.
	But this is a very hot NYP detective, NYPD detective.
	I don't know what race she is.
	She wears so much makeup.
	She could be Italian or Pilipina or a bunch of different ones.
	Do you know what this is?
	She's like Melissa Morales or something.
	Cop shows up in rap video.
	She's Hispanic.
	Yeah, she looks like every race, actually.
	How we doing, Sean?
	Horrible, horrible song.
	Oh, yeah?
	I must be a friend of hers.
	I think in both of these cases, we're seeing what affirmative action is doing to the police force.
	She doesn't really can do anything.
	She's not in uniform.
	You do a rope.
	Just want to smash it.
	Other than this zone, baby.
	Why do I wear sunglasses in the shop?
	Are you fool?
	Future's respect, huh?
	I'm about to drop a glass.
	Go leg, long ass bitch.
	But you want to smash it quick.
	The whole thing's about her.
	Would you like to have her as a partner on the midnights?
	Yeah, I would just fuck her.
	I'd be like, pull over him one morning.
	But I just fucked you.
	Detective in the City Police Department Special Victims Unit is raising eyebrows after appearing in a video.
	Melissa Mercado, a seven-year veteran of New York's finest, popped up on a music video published by World Star Hip Hop, which shows the curvy cop gyrating and shaking her body while wearing only a thong and a skimpy bra.
	Is that illegal?
	it's not illegal but like Yeah.
	She should be suspended and fired.
	No.
	And how does she become a detective in fucking seven years?
	How does she lock up anybody?
	You know what?
	The perps are going to be saying, oh, shit.
	I know who you are.
	Right?
	She's going to get no response.
	She probably claps them with their harassed cheese.
	Is anybody going to fucking respect her anyway?
	Like, outside the fact that she shows her pussy?
	I mean, come on, stop it.
	First off, she didn't do anything.
	She's not in uniform.
	She's not representing the fucking department.
	She's doing it on her own time.
	Who gives a fuck?
	Well, I understand that's how we all feel.
	And I didn't mean to say the word illegal, but as far as the unbecoming of a police officer thing, you think she should be fired, Ron.
	Yes, she should be fired.
	That's not the personality of a person that we want upholding our laws and charging people, charging people with indecency or something in the public.
	But stripping is legal.
	She wasn't working as a stripper.
	You can't prove she got paid to do that.
	She didn't have to disclose it.
	She just was being a whore on camera.
	These girls do it fucking all the time.
	How many whores do I work with?
	Quite a few.
	What about that?
	Remember that lap dance that cop gave?
	Vera Merculi.
	What did she do wrong?
	She had fun at a fucking party.
	The lieutenant was the one who got in trouble.
	He got transit.
	He got demoted.
	He didn't get demoted.
	He got transit to District 11.
	She wasn't a big dirty hoo-ah.
	She was just a dirty hoo-a, so she's all right in my book.
	She was having fun at a fucking Christmas party.
	Stop it.
	Whoever fucking.
	Whoever fucking videotaped it and dropped it to fucking the.
	You could have videotaped it, but somebody, you know, cops that are their worst enemies.
	They drop dimes on each other.
	Well, they want to share it around.
	It's funny.
	So a guy that wanted to fuck her who wasn't getting a lap dance, he sent it to the post, didn't he?
	Oh, somebody sent it to the post.
	Should end up in the post.
	That was a big scandal for a long time.
	So she kept her job.
	She still works in the 4-4.
	But you don't think they should, Ron.
	I don't have as much of a problem with Vera, what she did.
	She was like, he said it was at a party, and she didn't know she was being recorded, and she wasn't doing it for anything.
	This girl is on a rap video acting outside of what we expect a police officer to act like on duty or off duty.
	Well, she could be fired just for the mere fact that you have to give...
	We don't know she got paid.
	She never got paid.
	I'm sure she did.
	Maybe you're not sure she did.
	You believe she did.
	We all know she did.
	Can I prove that shit?
	No.
	The problem is, when you go to Notrar One Police Plaza, it's not beyond a reasonable doubt.
	It's preponderance of the evidence.
	You only need 51%.
	I'm Team Fat Mexican Chick.
	Would you say you're dating a fat Mexican chick?
	Oh, fuck.
	I said I'm team fat Mexican chick.
	I'm all on her side.
	Yeah, yeah.
	We all are.
	I just want to know what the, what's the word, parameters are for a cop.
	What does your shirt say, Ron?
	USAID, because money doesn't launder itself.
	Cool.
	Nice.
	Someone sent in a pit compilation of the Georgia State Patrol not fucking around.
	Unfortunately, Tim Dickman isn't here today because he is pro-PIT maneuvers, pro-chases, and Ron says, nope, it's not worth the risk.
	I'll speak on Dickman's behalf.
	Okay.
	You be Dickman.
	I'll be the dick.
	You see the one where they...
	Fuck them.
	I mean, when there's a median, it's much safer.
	Look at that.
	I've never seen that before.
	A truck gets pitted.
	And it's on its side.
	Turn it up.
	If I have to say turn it up again, Sean, I'm going to fucking lose my shit.
	You have headphones on.
	Yeah, I do.
	I just didn't know because it's just this song.
	The nasty star who goes.
	There's not one person in danger here.
	If this guy goes over the medium, he's the oncoming traffic.
	Oh, I just said it.
	And look what happens.
	They missed the hidden.
	They didn't go to the medium.
	Their sheriffs say put them in a ditch.
	They don't give a fuck.
	Until it's one of their kids in the car on on-coming and gets into a fucking accident and dies.
	Oh, that's Luke.
	Until it's the police chief's kid that's in the car on coming.
	Saying if this was your daughter is a cheap way to win an argument because we're all emotional when it comes to our kids.
	I'm not being cheap.
	I'm being honest.
	All right, let's say it's your wife.
	No, that's, I'm not...
	I'm not going to give you a good answer if it's my family.
	Right.
	But if it's you, you want this fucking jackass footwork.
	Because he stole shit out of Walmart?
	Fuck Walmart.
	Listen, the one thing I would agree with you in New York, because a cop will be found liable and go to prison.
	But down there, they're all for it.
	They say, pit these motherfuckers, throw them into the ditch.
	We don't give a fuck what happens.
	And you're colored.
	I'm okay with that.
	Or we could just Fucking stop traffic ahead and then beat the shit out of them.
	Or we could just fucking let them go and find out who it was at a later date.
	Beating the shit out of them would be illegal.
	But pitting them and having them thrown out of the car and die a horrible death.
	But Dickman's argument is: okay, if I know you're not going to chase me, then I'm going to go shoot people, rob banks, and have a gay old time.
	We'll get you.
	But we're going back to the same argument of last week.
	60% of homicides get solved in New York.
	I don't know what it is for bank robbery, but it's probably worse.
	So you're not going to get them.
	You don't get them.
	60% of homicides is higher than that.
	Clearance rate is probably 90%.
	What does clearance rate mean?
	Do you solve the crime?
	Well, they solve it or they came to a conclusion.
	No, it's half-factual clearance.
	In other words, they don't prosecute.
	Doesn't sound like these people are getting caught.
	You want to put some in his ice?
	So my problem with your argument is this whole, well, we're going to get you anyway.
	Really?
	Yeah.
	They're not getting.
	Well, you got to look at what outweighs.
	Pitting this guy on the major dig in traffic, is it worth what we're going to go through if we hurt somebody?
	It's the pattern that it begets.
	For example, with shoplifting, you go, do I really want to risk tackling this shoplifter getting hurt for what?
	For what?
	A chocolate bar?
	And you go, so let's just make it under $800.
	Don't pursue them.
	Well, now you've got these people coming in with contractor bags.
	I'm not talking about the law, changing the law.
	How about Walmart or Home Depot or whatever hires some people at the front door?
	Let them hire somebody and let them stop the guys as they steal.
	They don't want to risk there being violence and the security guard hurting them.
	So Home Depot doesn't mind you going as a cop and pitting somebody and getting in lawsuits and killing some fucking person, because they don't want the optics of fucking having somebody get stopped in their store and get the shit kicked out of them.
	Fuck Home Depot and fuck Walmart and fuck the rest of them.
	Let them fucking hire somebody.
	I don't think they could put some shit.
	Why are you putting it on the cop every fucking time?
	I'm sure they have rules of pitting people.
	You can't just pit somebody for a pet at larceny.
	It's got to be probably a felony just like any other.
	I think what Dickman was saying, like, you know, he's a free-for-all guy with the fucking pitting maneuver.
	Maddie, did you die over there?
	No, I'm not on.
	You need some Narcan or something?
	Maddie, are you on my side on this?
	I think Maddie's fucking in outer space.
	No, I'm not in outer space.
	I wasn't on the screen.
	Well, you're not on the screen when you don't talk.
	No.
	Okay.
	Wow.
	You lay a fucking Ewok.
	You really do.
	What are your old Ewoks?
	This email isn't as fun as I thought it would be.
	Let's.
	Princess Laya fucked an Ewok and I do.
	Right, huh?
	Cops Woman Wants to Be Right.
	So this is another female cop story.
	Let's check it out here.
	324th, 2024.
	An officer pulled over a vehicle for speeding.
	Hi.
	Oh, this is famous.
	This has been sent to me a million times.
	I'm just trying to go back to my hotel, and I know I was speeding.
	I'm so sorry.
	You got your driver license registration proof and insurance?
	Where are you coming from?
	I was at an Airbnb where my son is at.
	He plays football, so I'm here.
	And I came from where they were staying, and I'm going back to my place.
	How much have you had to drink tonight?
	I did have a glass of wine.
	I'm not going to lie.
	A glass of wine?
	I did, yes.
	Please don't like.
	Well, I mean, you're going well over 100 miles an hour.
	You didn't even realize you passed me.
	And you're swerving all over the road.
	So, I mean, it's kind of a problem here now.
	Just follow the tip of the pen with your eyes on me, okay?
	Before there was cameras, there must have been cops getting blowjobs every 10 minutes.
	Follow the tip of my dick.
	I can't do this normally, but okay.
	One, two, three.
	Why not use the taste?
	Maybe because I'm white.
	I guess this is what I'm thinking now.
	But yep, go ahead.
	Right.
	Left.
	Right.
	Left.
	That's the one.
	You know, you have alphabet from A. She doesn't look drunk to me.
	Are you still in the middle?
	It's part of the instructions.
	I have to add.
	Yes, I do.
	A, B, C. All right.
	None of that shit is legal or admissible.
	What's the best way to send you a video, Sean?
	Text, email, email.
	I mean, you've got indicators.
	They're not standardized tests.
	They're three standardized tests, and that's the only ones you're supposed to be able to use.
	Tim said that those touches is going to be tested.
	It's not part of the standardized priority test.
	The big men go in.
	I'm digging.
	You're not getting arrested, and you're not getting it.
	Because there's, like, you just said, there's not enough for you to do that.
	We're not allowed to do that.
	There's enough for me to tell you not to drive.
	When we go to the academy, you have to take SFST.
	You don't have to make up your own shit.
	I can't feel it.
	You don't have enough.
	That's what you're saying.
	Like, it doesn't make sense to me.
	John, when people are talking and the video audio is playing, no one at home can hear.
	Well, pause it or turn it down.
	Like, how do you not know that?
	I've been turning it down when people.
	Okay, turning it down.
	I think a lot of people love it when we talk over the video, especially Caesar.
	Like, I don't understand why you don't know things that I know.
	I've been putting it down.
	I guess I just was opening this email for a second.
	Okay.
	And Stiggs is leaning back a lot.
	Are you getting his audio?
	If Ron can move his microphone forward maybe a little bit, that would help.
	Yeah, his is a little loud.
	I can't get a good idea.
	So forwards doesn't mean anything.
	Away from him.
	Away from him.
	How about now?
	That should be good.
	Well, he was talking about Ron.
	He says Ron was too close.
	Yeah, I think so.
	Yeah.
	So let's get this right.
	So the whole like looking at the pen thing is not admissible in court.
	Looking at the pen is admissible.
	That's called horizontal gaze, nystagmus.
	And it's not.
	The pen is to, they see an involuntary ticking of your eye.
	So when you get fucked up, your eye normally moves like a Rolex.
	It's very smooth.
	When you're fucked up, it will tick.
	All right.
	And then when you hold it out very wide.
	Like a time axe.
	Like a time axe, basically.
	And when they look at it, it will bounce.
	So it's involuntary.
	You can't fight it.
	Your eye does it when you're fucked up.
	It's just the way it is.
	The walk and turn, you know, walk the line, turn around and come back is what they teach you.
	And they call it a one-leg stand.
	You got to stand on your leg and fucking hold up and count, blah, blah, blah.
	Those are the only ones they use.
	They don't use anything else.
	Both of those are admissible?
	Yes.
	Those are standardized tests that they give all the cops in New York State.
	Anything else is made up.
	As far as I know, they're not going to let you use that shit in court.
	Man, it might be a different state.
	No, they just pass a law in New York.
	It's standardized.
	It's supposed to be standardized all over the country, but it's at least standardized in New York.
	And what about the breathalyzer?
	The breathalyzer can show the presence of alcohol.
	You can't say, all right, Maddie blew a fucking 1.6.
	So he, you know, yeah, it definitely shows that he has alcohol.
	It's probably pretty accurate, but it's not as accurate as the breathalyzer inside.
	The one inside is completely admissible.
	So the only reason you breathalyze them on the road is to get them back to the station, and then you have to correct.
	It's a straight-probable corner.
	Yes, it's just like everything else.
	I don't need any of that.
	If I walk up and your eyes are glassy and you're fucking smell like alcohol and you're slurring your speech and I can articulate that, I don't need to do anything else.
	You can refuse at all and I can see the rest of my test.
	Let me ask you a question, Stig.
	I'm right here.
	If you were to give advice, we had friends in front of us, the audience, what do you say?
	Blow or don't blow?
	Absolutely fucking.
	I'm going to tell you what I was, I just taught a class at Iron College.
	I told them the same thing.
	Do not, under any circumstance, blow.
	Do not take any tests.
	Do not answer any fucking questions.
	Everything she did was completely wrong.
	Please, under no circumstance, be rude.
	Don't be fucking confrontational.
	But you can politely fucking refuse everything.
	You do not take any tests.
	Don't blow.
	Don't blow when they take you in.
	They used to give you a warning and Nurse Shell would say, you know, they would give you a whole warning.
	If you don't do this, you're blah, blah, blah.
	And people would never blow.
	And then they stopped giving it because the DA said nobody blows.
	So now everyone thinks they have to blow.
	You do not have to fucking establish the case for the police.
	Don't cooperate.
	Be polite.
	You're going to be arrested, but you And it's just a six-month suspension on your driver's case.
	It's much easier to beat the case if they hurt you.
	Well, if you don't blow and you have a CDL, what's a CDL?
	Commercial driver's license.
	You got to blow if you have a CDO, then you'll lose your CDL license.
	Well, you won't be able to get it back.
	They won't give you a temporary license.
	Okay, I have a commercial driver's license.
	I didn't blow.
	Okay.
	Tell me the facts.
	Well, if you have a CDL, I wonder what.
	And also, don't engage in conversation with the cops where they're asking you, where were you?
	What's going on?
	How you feeling?
	Do you live around here?
	Please, where are you coming from?
	Were you drinking?
	No.
	You don't have to answer anything.
	Honestly, I'm asking you questions I know the answer to.
	I'm asking you questions because I have a body camera on or I have a microphone on and I'm going to get you to admit you in court.
	That doesn't go for, just go for Deewee's.
	It goes for a traffic stop.
	Do you know why I stopped you?
	No, sir.
	Do you know how fast you're going?
	No, sir.
	Don't answer the questions.
	He's fucking recording you.
	And when you go to trial to try to fight it, he's going to play that to the judge.
	And the judge's going to be like, oh, you dumb fuck.
	You admitted it.
	And if this wasn't a DWI case, she admitted that she was speeding.
	I know I was speeding officer.
	Yeah, don't ever do that.
	You just get, you've done my job for me.
	All right.
	I'm never asking you questions because I'm trying to figure shit out.
	I know what you fucking did.
	I'm watching you.
	I'm sitting on the traffic stop.
	I'm sitting on the fucking stop sign.
	I know you ran through it.
	I just want you to admit it on camera just because it makes everything fucking easier when you try to break my balls in court.
	What about when you, so you don't do the breathalyzer?
	They take you back, or maybe you do do the breathalyzer.
	They take you back to the station and they go, okay, now you have to do the real one.
	Never.
	No.
	You say no to that too.
	Yes.
	Under no circumstances are you obligated to provide more evidence.
	Unless you have an accident and you're unconscious, it's called implied consent.
	They can take your blood.
	As long as you are not unconscious and you can say no, you say no.
	No blood test, no nothing.
	Don't give piss, don't give blood, don't give nothing, don't give anything.
	Just be polite.
	No, I refuse to do that.
	I'm not going to.
	If it's an injury with an auto accident, though, they're going to get a search warrant and take your blood.
	Yes.
	If someone gets killed, you have to provide it.
	They're going to get it no matter what.
	But I would also, if you're fucked up, would encourage you to stall as long as possible.
	But also, you got to realize if you have like a shitty car, because I got stopped on the way here by Westchester County.
	I actually taped it.
	We listened to it before.
	You know, I knew the cop.
	He's from the gym.
	And he basically, I said, what'd you stop me for?
	He says, I said, no, no, no, no.
	Seriously.
	I said, was I on the phone?
	Because I was on the phone, but he couldn't see that.
	He goes, oh, you had a bed plate.
	Yeah, bullshit.
	It was bullshit.
	He was probably just seeing the, you know, he was fishing.
	He was fishing.
	And that's the guy who says he never pulls people over.
	Apparently you do.
	Okay, let's watch a little bit more of this.
	Hot chick.
	I'm not arguing with you.
	You just said I'm letting her know that there's not enough for me to let you slide.
	To take you to jail.
	Yes.
	You do.
	There's enough to detain you and do the roadside for me.
	Anyway, you just said there was not enough.
	That's all I'm saying.
	Yeah, which is why you're not a handgun.
	Right, okay.
	That's all I'm saying.
	So you're not letting me slide.
	It's just that you don't have enough.
	That's all.
	Just shut the fuck up.
	No, she ain't.
	They were about to let her slide, and now she's like, bullshit, you're not letting me slide.
	It's because you don't have to shit on me.
	The number one rule of sales is after the customer says yes, stop selling.
	Yeah.
	Give them the car.
	Yeah, you don't want pinstripes.
	That's what you said to me.
	Okay.
	I'm going to make myself.
	I don't know if it's a black and white factor here because you guys play that part.
	Not in front of me.
	But you guys play that part.
	You don't even know who was pulling you over.
	It could have been anybody.
	So how do you play that part?
	But now that you did.
	Now that you did, I know.
	So now, not only did you motherfuckers not let me slide, it's because you don't have enough.
	They're also racist blacks.
	It is, it is.
	You're really, really paving the way for us.
	Oh, now she got a meaning.
	There we go.
	Let me tell you something.
	You don't talk to me like that.
	Let me tell you something.
	Is that your name?
	Don't go in the road.
	The woman's not even obviously like black or Hispanic, too.
	Disrespect, and how dare you, when you get fucking all that attribute going together, it is fucking immediately.
	Absolutely not.
	All right, just have a seat in your car until you're right to get here.
	No, but you're going to keep talking, right?
	Talking.
	What are you doing?
	She's recording.
	I know.
	Stop.
	Problem is, they admitted to her that they'd have an office suddenly.
	They started making her brave.
	She goes under the category of just a stupid cunt.
	Yes.
	That's also.
	She's being a cunt now.
	Have a seat on the passage.
	That's a shower.
	Out of the road.
	Come on this, or come on this side.
	Your car is far over the way.
	You're not locking her up.
	Get in the fucking car and drive away.
	You know what happened, Ron?
	I think this officer was selling wolf tickets.
	He's doing a fucking exam, and I'm sure, like, like Stings just said, he could have found something to fucking take her in for a Deewee.
	But he didn't want to do it.
	You can record, but we're not going to argue on this subject.
	You guys want to pull people over, just pull people over, and then when it's a real fucking thing, you're like, oh, fuck.
	This is four hours of fucking paperwork, and I don't want to deal with it.
	She turned the tables on this.
	How does this go?
	You know what I would do if I was her?
	I would take their cups and arrest them.
	I did not.
	And take them down to the station and throw them in jail.
	For stupidity?
	I did not disrespect you.
	For being disrespectful and racist.
	No, I did not.
	Maybe it's a female thing.
	Now you want to be funny.
	I'm going to tell you what.
	You don't know who I am.
	But you're going to make it up.
	Because she's speaking fast.
	We don't know who she is.
	It's just Hispanicus, hystericus.
	Because you told me I don't know your background.
	You're in my face, pointing your finger in my face.
	You were.
	It's funny how now you step back.
	Funny how you did that.
	Are you going to charge them with finger pointing?
	And I did not disrespect you.
	From the second you pulled me over, I did not disrespect you.
	Okay, if you don't think so, then that's your opinion.
	No, I did not.
	Show your video.
	I did not.
	Yeah, if I showed up there, I would have been like, yo, is she or in the rest?
	No, all right, please get your car and go.
	And then I would have been like, you two fucking idiots.
	Don't ever fucking do this again.
	You look like jerk-offs.
	Arrest a bitch or let her go.
	Don't fucking scold her.
	This is how these guys get CCRBs.
	She's not your fucking baby.
	She's not your daughter.
	But it's ironic you say that because the reason she's talking to them like that is she's used to being, I don't know, a teacher or definitely a mom with the kids and she doesn't take any shit.
	But also that's in her head.
	And then when she meets other adults, she starts talking to them like they're 19-year-olds.
	You don't know me, you don't know my background.
	They give her too much fucking leeway.
	They basically let her know that she's in the right, per se.
	And then now she's got power.
	So they're fucking on their back foot.
	And if they do lock her up, they look terrible.
	Oh, this is getting thrown out immediately.
	Why are you even detaining her?
	Now this is like a Fourth Amendment fucking problem at this point.
	Maybe creep forward a little bit, Sean.
	Yeah, like to the end.
	Creep to the point where she takes.
	She shows her fucking tits.
	Or when she gets punched in the face.
	She's kind of hot, though.
	Now the white wine's coming out.
	When she's doing it, let her make it loud.
	You think you're a fucking cop and you can fuck to me like that?
	You little bitch?
	No, you're really not.
	Record it because I don't give a f***.
	Why do we still have a thing over here?
	I don't f ⁇ with nobody!
	So don't get in my face like that, you bitch!
	Could you lock her up for going 100%?
	Because you have that when she's out of the way.
	I mean, yeah, no, it is where you are.
	Well, that's reckless and dangerous.
	Twice the speed limit is generally considered.
	LJ, come get me because I'm there.
	Isn't that a felony?
	No, she's literally like information.
	She doesn't know me.
	She's like, you don't know what I've been through?
	Because she don't know what I've been through.
	The penal code's on that blue chair.
	LJ.
	Who's she talking to?
	Okay, skip ahead.
	I want to see her get cuffed.
	You think you're a cop?
	Yeah, I am.
	Does she get cuffed eventually?
	Oh, yeah.
	Wait, go back.
	We want to see the straw that broke the camel's back.
	Bro.
	Okay.
	Spanish or whatever this bitch is.
	I'm so sick of this in America that I gotta be treated like a fucking immigrant.
	You are a fucking immigrant.
	We're all immigrants.
	We're all immigrants, baby girl.
	Shut up.
	I don't know what she is.
	That's what she is.
	I was born in the American moment.
	You're from colonizers, so.
	I've been here since 99.
	I'm not.
	It's funny how she was talking shit, putting her fingers in my face, and now she was wanting to say, like, no, I didn't.
	I could tell they were both.
	My daughter did this once.
	She called me and she was like, this motherfucker says I don't have a ticket for the train.
	Do you?
	No.
	Get him on the phone.
	Sir, I am sorry.
	We are wrong.
	Yeah, I have your license for these stupid motherfuckers that want to check everything.
	Because, like, you know, you're American.
	Sorry, you're American.
	He's a member of Ben Ben Madlock, I think.
	Dump bitch.
	Funny you're keeping your mouth shut because you're recording me.
	I know you're recording me, but did you get her talking shit to me?
	That little bitch?
	Yes, we did.
	Let's end the video.
	Shit on you, little bitch.
	All right, man.
	That's there.
	There we go.
	No, listen.
	Let me just talk to my son.
	Please.
	On the floor, please stop.
	Just stop.
	They always do this, too.
	They talk a big game.
	They're like, wait, wait, I'm sorry.
	I'm sorry.
	If she had only one hand, can you legally cuff her one hand and one breast together?
	It's got to be a pretty long boob.
	Just let me talk to my son.
	Is that who she was?
	Oh, you're right.
	She is divorced.
	So the man she calls is her 18-year-old son.
	Could you put up with that bullshit after she had a couple glasses of fucking Pinot?
	If she looked like that, yeah, I would just put my dick in her mouth to shut her up.
	You don't even want to fuck her.
	Yeah.
	Okay.
	Yeah, fucking Ewok babies like mad.
	Of course.
	You put her down.
	Tara.
	No, pat me down.
	Don't let her touch me.
	Turn off.
	Don't let her touch me.
	No, She's not.
	I'm sure I could learn to love him.
	I'd be jealous of the son after he got to climb out of it.
	I'd want to smell her son because he was in her pussy 18 years ago.
	I am the single mother whisperer, so she would.
	There's parts of your body you haven't really cleaned.
	I do.
	I can smell you taped.
	You got to suck her tits 18 years ago, you lucky bastard.
	Okay, crawl ahead.
	Christina, have a seat in the car.
	You're sexually harassing me.
	You're sexually harassing me.
	Don't touch me.
	No, you're actually harassing me.
	Have a seat or you're going to be tased.
	No.
	Sit in the car.
	You're sexually harassed.
	They tased her.
	They tased her.
	They're going to jail and get fired.
	Christina, you're sexually harassing me.
	Christina, stop.
	You're making it worse.
	I'm not touching your tips.
	Have a seat.
	Why would you motivate the fuck out of her?
	Is that a tattoo?
	Do you see my chin?
	I just got it done.
	Oh, because you can harass me?
	That's a problem with those fucking single fucking cage.
	What they need to do with that thing is they just have a cop on the other side and pull her through.
	I've seen these ladies.
	Whoa.
	Rip her ass from the other fucking side of her.
	She got a little fucking little spare tire there.
	I like that.
	Yeah, I mean, you can make fun of her about it and bring her down about it.
	Girls with a little meat are much more enjoyable.
	And she's a good age, too.
	Yeah.
	Oh, yeah.
	What is she sniffing him?
	You said I could talk to my son.
	Let me talk to my son.
	She knows Joe Biden.
	No, not resulting.
	No, you told me about it.
	I have a bite of pussy.
	No.
	You sit down in this shoe.
	Some of these guys are great.
	Let go of the seatbelt.
	Let me talk to my son.
	Talk to my son?
	What's he going to do?
	Is he Superman?
	Let me talk to my son.
	He's going to law school.
	Let me talk to my son.
	I thought he was playing football.
	My son is a quarterback on the high school football team.
	Maddie, can we get some fucking niggers?
	Market, can you give me that one?
	Gavin, one drink because he's being a little bit more.
	Put your butt in the car.
	Let me talk to my son.
	Let me talk to my son.
	Nope, let me talk to my son.
	Yeah, Lent.
	Like this fucking guy's going to have it.
	Thanks.
	Okay, crawl forward.
	Stop harassing me.
	Let me talk to my son.
	Stop harassing me.
	Gavin didn't bring that fucking home to make his bar home.
	He was going to bring it back in the car.
	I might bring it home.
	I'm allowed to, unless you're allowed to get wasted on Sundays.
	So 1159 on.
	Could you pause this a sec?
	Yes.
	If they tase her, they should be fired.
	Yes.
	And I'm a cop's cop.
	Agreed.
	She's 125 pounds, all breast.
	And we're talking about clearly not 125 pounds because you didn't see her fucking spare attire.
	No, I'm not saying that.
	I like 160 pounds.
	You could demean her about it.
	Oh, she's heavier than you.
	You could hold onto it in bed when you're spooning her.
	It's like a bad one.
	She's a little lighter than me.
	Okay, scroll forward a little bit here because she has a second.
	Yeah, get her at the station.
	Okay, so they don't tase her.
	No.
	But clearly, you're bigger than me.
	Don't squeeze me.
	Because I'm fing white.
	That's exactly what it is.
	She's white?
	Don't squeeze me because I'm white.
	That's a t-shirt.
	She definitely didn't do it.
	I'll tell you, if you knock off the garbage.
	What part of Florida is?
	You're the garbage.
	Well, this is what I'm talking about.
	Africa.
	You're the garbage.
	First, you had a problem with her.
	Now you got to figure it out.
	First, she got in my face, that little bitch.
	That's why it started.
	This is why you put it up.
	So, no, that's why it started because she got in my face.
	And you think that's okay?
	She got in my face.
	You think a two-man?
	out of my face.
	Do you think your behavior You're okay.
	It's not okay.
	Your behavior is not fine.
	So you got in my face.
	So why don't you tell me your problem talking like that?
	So why don't you tell me?
	Oh my God.
	Oh my god, he's Jesus.
	Oh my God.
	You got something to say about race now?
	The chocolate squad has arrived.
	She's Detroit.
	He's so black, he's fucking.
	He looks like a negative.
	He's an unlocked horrible character.
	It's like someone just rolled an Easter basket into the precinct.
	Now what you got to say.
	Okay, go back.
	Go back, Sean.
	I want to see their entrance.
	She's going to get to the courthouse.
	The judge is going to be bad.
	They're sitting there.
	They're like, stop, stop talking.
	You're going to summon Quinticia.
	And Leroy.
	And Leroy.
	But she just kept going.
	And all this stuff was trouble.
	Come here, baby girl.
	Let me bring out the EEO officer.
	She summoned the chocolate factory.
	Careful what you wish for, Willy Wonka.
	She's a department of the laziest fucking cops.
	She went to the Willy Wonker and the chocolate factory.
	She was the laziest group of cops.
	John, that's my joke.
	She's fucking talked herself into this one.
	You can't just repeat my joke.
	Who me?
	No, John.
	He took my Willy Wonka joke.
	You slow, you blow.
	Okay, let's watch them enter.
	Okay, it's not okay.
	Your behavior is not okay.
	You got in my face.
	You got in my face.
	So why don't you tell me your problem talking like that?
	So why don't you tell me?
	Hi.
	First and foremost, you're going to stop yelling and you're spilling.
	Well, no.
	We're not doing that.
	She's not turning person.
	It ain't got nothing to do with your colour of your skin.
	It's everything.
	I care less than the during about the colour of your skin.
	I am very.
	And God serves us both.
	What I'm going to say.
	I don't care.
	That's what I'm saying.
	But we invoked God.
	That God shit.
	And they say, have a blessed day.
	Why?
	Because I don't need to.
	If you're going to get scolded by a black female, you are in trouble.
	They're going to bury her under the fucking jail.
	Let's play it.
	Let's go.
	Don't talk back.
	What the fuck did I say?
	Go back.
	Either pause it or kill the volume.
	All right, sorry.
	People are not magic.
	They can't hear three people at once and watch a video.
	It's not super ears.
	Okay.
	You want me to play it?
	Go back.
	If these guys start nattering, it's quality.
	So just pause it.
	I think it was Don Cornelius.
	That's Cornelius for the Planet of the Apes.
	I thought you really knew him.
	I thought you really knew him.
	Isn't it?
	That's Cornelius.
	Remember him?
	He got away at the end.
	Sean, this is a free episode that everyone sees, so please don't get us canceled.
	Chocolate is more politically correct analogy.
	He's got 25 fucking hash marks.
	He's been there since 1972.
	Go ahead.
	No, it's funny.
	I'm the only white person.
	They're colouring your skin with everything.
	I tell that stupid girl's got to colour your skin.
	I pray the same area.
	I pray.
	I am going to make something.
	And God serves us both.
	She's probably the fucking.
	Okay, that's good.
	That's good.
	But you need to answer these questions so we can get you in the business.
	I'm not answering nothing.
	Just pause it when they talk, Sean, because I want to hear everyone.
	Okay.
	Maddie, did this happen to you?
	No, not at the jail.
	Because I don't need to.
	Why?
	Because I don't need to.
	Okay, she's cute.
	No, I'm not trying to be cute.
	No, you're not cute.
	No, she said you're cute.
	That's what we were all saying.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	Like your titties.
	She's just booking forever.
	Yeah, this has gone on entirely too long.
	Oh, my God.
	For the show, or do you mean in real life?
	No, no, no, no.
	I mean in real life.
	50-50.
	Yeah.
	For the show also, but in real life, this is a two-hour show on fucking Cornelius and the guy who's got from the Planet of the Apes.
	Yeah, okay, we got the Planet of the Apes.
	Did you get Willy Wonka and the Chalker back there?
	That was a much better one.
	Is it Cornelius?
	I'm changing you.
	So why?
	Where are you going to be?
	Let's stop, though.
	You got to be on the bottom.
	Let's go.
	Yeah, we ain't going to break back.
	Damn right.
	I'm the one who's going to change that.
	This way, baby.
	I'm not grabbing.
	Don't talk to me.
	Because that's what you're saying.
	You can get all your clothes and that's it.
	I'm Biz Biz.
	Wait, first of all, I want to...
	No, no, no, no.
	No, no, no, no.
	First of all, I'm talking no more.
	I'm done.
	No, I agree.
	You don't think you told me I'm a rich anymore.
	Why are you gonna tell me that?
	I can't tell you that because you can't marry my friends.
	Why did you think you'll pass female intake to male intake?
	I hope she's a tranny.
	No.
	No. 13.
	We're 3017.
	Why is you not answering no question?
	839.
	And that's your personal business.
	You're done.
	Fair enough.
	Okay.
	She's got a necklace that we couldn't get.
	We don't talk about it.
	No.
	With violence.
	That was a great example of how to fuck yourself out of being letters.
	Talk yourself into getting arrested for fucking dumb shit.
	And, you know, that's the beauty of.
	It makes life a lot easier, but probably gave them way more paperwork than they wanted.
	Yeah, but she felt so...
	She got her point across.
	She did.
	She did.
	This is a good video to show your kids how not to act like an asshole.
	How do you get lost?
	Yeah.
	When you're on spring break or something.
	If she was just polite, I'm sure that we wouldn't need me talking.
	I apologize for making you pull me over.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, that's the one you said.
	It would have been fine the rest of the night.
	She could have got finished that line.
	You probably have a BBC.
	Yes.
	Go to the one I emailed you.
	So this is some crazy lady at the shopping mall, no, at the grocery store, and she's causing a disturbance.
	So they just kick her out.
	But then I'm watching it and I'm like, did you really cause a disturbance?
	And then all the crazy shit she's saying starts to sound more and more rational until I ended up on her side.
	I was drinking a lot of beers when I watched this, but she's kind of right.
	And she brings up a great point.
	They always say in a, go back to the beginning, in an establishment, right?
	It's a private place.
	So Arby's can say, get the fuck out of here.
	We don't want you here.
	They don't need a reason.
	But Arby's couldn't say whites only.
	So are you allowed to just say this person can't come to my establishment anymore without if it's posted, you know, so I was in Florida and they had a sign everywhere.
	It said the Broward County Sheriffs have the right to tell you to get the fuck out of here.
	And if you don't, you're going to be arrested.
	So like you can have.
	That's trespass.
	Well, yes, but they're given a lawful order.
	You didn't leave.
	It says signs.
	So they're conspicuously posted, which is one of our rules.
	It's got to be a conspicuously posted fucking sign.
	And they're literally like, yo, if you fuck around and we tell you to leave, we're locking your ass up.
	Okay, so what if a restaurant in Florida kicked out 100 people and you look at the list and you realize 100% of these people are black?
	Yeah, but a Kevin, it's like a bar.
	If you're not allowed to go into a bar.
	If you're in a Corona, could you crack it for me?
	If the bartender says, listen, we don't want you in here anymore because every time you come here, you're a dick.
	That bartender, you know, it's like a store.
	Surely you could get fucked if there was a pattern like all fucking cops.
	What if you found everyone wearing any kind of pro-cop shit got kicked out?
	So the mall in the 4-4, they have pictures on the wall inside the office.
	There's pictures on the wall that Polaroids, they text actual Polaroids, and these people aren't allowed in the store.
	And they're given a piece of paperwork and they're told, you are not allowed in the store anymore at the time where they're arrested for shoplifting.
	Yeah, but that's a reason.
	Do you need a reason?
	Technically, I mean, no, if it's a private business, you can throw anyone out you want.
	Is it good business?
	No, it's terrible business.
	But they would have to serve you with official paperwork saying you're no longer welcome back in there.
	If you respond, come back, we're going to have you arrested.
	They generally do it in front of a cop so that we can note it.
	It's like a notice of trespass, it says.
	Yeah, it's exactly what it is.
	All right.
	Well, This woman says you can't kick me out without evidence that I did something wrong.
	And I'm not sure she did anything wrong.
	But go to the beginning.
	This is the beginning.
	Oh, okay.
	She's a smart bag lady.
	I'm being kicked out of the store because I'm white.
	It's a black person's word over a white person's word.
	On June 6th, I believe, 2022.
	So what's the problem here?
	Officers were dispatched to Kroger following reports of a woman behaving disorderly towards staff and customers.
	Thank you.
	I think you're going to have to hurry up and get this crazy baby out here.
	Genie of this.
	How are you doing, man?
	They know instantly who it is.
	So, that's right.
	So.
	They're asking me to ask you to leave.
	And do you have any reasons for that that's both the weekly?
	So they are banning you from the store, so you are going to leave.
	Well, can you explain a legal reason why?
	No, you didn't.
	I want a legal reason for you to leave.
	I don't have to explain anything to you, so put your stuff back.
	Get away from that.
	That's why he's fucking good.
	Yeah, he was decisive.
	He may not be right, but he was decisive.
	So if you're going to do something, you got to just fucking do it.
	Yeah, but your legal reason is you were told you're not allowed in the store.
	So if you come back here, you're going to be trespassed.
	I'm asking you to leave once.
	If I ask you twice, I'm going to put you in handcuffs and you're going to go for trespassing.
	But initially, why is she being told not to come back?
	And why is she being told to leave?
	Because without that, he's just the fucking Gestapo and doing what they're telling her.
	You got to have a reason.
	Because you're dressed ridiculously.
	Yeah, but she knows what the fuck's going on, but she just wants to fucking...
	But I think, here's what happened.
	There's a black woman who works there.
	She's wearing a COVID mask.
	And the lunatic genie here goes, get away from me.
	I don't like women with COVID masks.
	You have a higher risk of having COVID.
	You're paranoid.
	You have a bad immune system.
	And I don't want to be near you.
	Stay six feet away from me.
	And that's whatever.
	I don't even know if I agree with her.
	Well, she's an employee there.
	Yep, she's an employee.
	So that genie lady said that to the employee who was wearing a mask.
	The genie lady is fucking Maddie if you lived in Florida.
	And so the genie lady goes, the genie lady goes, sorry, the black woman with the mask.
	She's white Bobby Eden.
	She called the cops immediately.
	Just called the cops on her for that.
	She's at her place of business.
	She could cast a spell on the offices, though.
	Like she's harassing the lady at work.
	I'll leave, but on the way out, you got three wishes.
	Okay, one of them is, I wish you would leave.
	Leave.
	No, you're not.
	You're another.
	Oh, you're going to stop right here.
	What is your name?
	I don't give strangers my name.
	Is there another police?
	Can I give you a question?
	What is your name?
	Can I please talk to another police?
	Wait a minute.
	What have I done using one?
	Everyone's doing the color.
	Explain it to you.
	Have I stolen?
	Have I hit anybody?
	Have I done anything wrong?
	Okay, you're going to let me talk to you and explain.
	I'm waiting.
	All right, don't interrupt me again.
	You don't give me any type of orders, okay?
	So don't interrupt me when I'm talking.
	What is her name?
	I'm asking you what is the legal reason.
	No, they want you out of the store.
	But she's right.
	What is the legal criteria?
	Stop for a second.
	She's right, though.
	She doesn't have to give him her name.
	No, she doesn't have to answer anything.
	I mean, unless they're going to arrest her.
	No, she's committed no crime.
	She has no reason to really provide him with any information.
	She is totally right.
	The lady called the cop on because she was saying, stay away from me.
	You got a COVID mask.
	She was harassing an employee.
	So what?
	And he woke up.
	What harassment?
	How fucking time you got?
	But do you have to give your name for that?
	No.
	She looks like somebody I fuck with.
	But if you're harassing the employees in the store, that's grounds for them to tell you to leave.
	Okay.
	Okay.
	Do you have to give your name to the cop?
	I didn't say I'm asking.
	No, you don't have to say anything to a cop pepper.
	In the presence of the case officer.
	Well, in New York.
	Fifth Amendment right.
	The right to remain silent.
	She's not being accused of any crime.
	She's not being, she has not done any violations.
	She has no, it's, I can ask you for your ID.
	I can ask you for your name.
	You don't have to tell me shit.
	She's trying to run her.
	They may have a system where in these stores down there.
	No, no, you're tired of it.
	They can see if she's been trespassed or whatever.
	The person who called the cops on her is an employee who had a COVID mask on.
	She approached the woman and says, you need to stay away from me.
	I don't like people with COVID masks because you have a compromise immune system.
	You may have COVID.
	So stay away from me.
	You can't go in there and harass the employees.
	So they say, you need to leave.
	No, that's so funny that you say that.
	So I can't go in there.
	You can't go in the police department, in the police precinct either and start recording, right?
	And harassment?
	Sure, you can.
	Oh, that's not.
	That's not harassing anybody.
	It's not in the middle of the money.
	You can harass whoever the hell you want.
	You have a First Amendment right.
	I can say, I don't like you because you're fucking wearing a black shirt and blue jeans.
	Go fuck yourself.
	Your hair looks retarded.
	Absolutely.
	Well, here's the part I don't get.
	She was eager to leave.
	And he said, no, no, no, stop, stop, stop.
	What's your name?
	Once she leaves, you've done your job.
	He corrected this situation and he should have just let it fucking go.
	Let her keep walking.
	He went in front of her and now he's got his notepad out.
	That's the issue.
	Well, cops are always thinking about, they got to do a report.
	They got to do a trespass form.
	Get her name.
	The problem is, honestly, when you become a cop, they really fucking ingrain into your head, you need everyone's name, date of birth, phone number, and address.
	And her breast size.
	And her large.
	And how her breasts cover her fucking belly button.
	She was probably high.
	And what pirate ship she just came off of?
	She was on the orca.
	She just came.
	What ship she departed from?
	She's Blackbeard's nan.
	But no, they break your balls if you don't get everyone's fucking name and deal with them like that.
	Honestly, most people don't realize you don't have to give them any information.
	I used to make up names.
	Yeah, all the time.
	Yeah.
	All the time.
	Andrew Fenwick, that was my name throughout all high school with all cops.
	Once you get the hang of it, you're like, all right, this is all bullshit.
	You just start plucking, you know, Federico fucking Rodriguez.
	Okay, let it cook.
	Let the genie cook.
	Okay, let me ask you this: what have you been doing in here today reasonably?
	So the call that we got was you were in here causing a disturbance, cursing people out.
	I didn't curse anybody.
	I never said a curse word.
	Can you put that on the video so I can see it?
	I don't know.
	You're going to have to ask me.
	I need concrete evidence and I'd like to talk to my lawyer, please.
	What is your name, ma'am?
	The privacy act under the federal law.
	Privacy act.
	Privacy is if you have not committed a crime, you don't need to give any officer.
	You have the same level as me if I haven't committed a crime.
	You cannot use force on somebody who has not committed a crime.
	I have not cursed.
	Can I?
	She might be related to Maddie in that she's probably Scots-Irish.
	They got the same hair.
	That's a very Scottish mentality.
	I've seen that fit at home.
	She's got a bigger cock.
	She was Lady's Auxiliary in the Hell's Angels.
	The Banditos, I think.
	The pirates.
	I please see some concrete evidence.
	Excuse me, but what crime have I committed to warrant you guys coming in here like an army to shoot me or something?
	I'd like to know in legal language what crime I have committed.
	Unfortunately, it takes a little bit of experience dealing with this bullshit.
	And you realize, like, we don't have to fucking deal with this.
	We don't have to go through this.
	She agreed to leave.
	Listen, thank you very much for leaving.
	Blah, blah, blah.
	You want to ride someplace?
	I would fucking drive her to the next fucking supermarket.
	Don't fuck with them.
	That's it.
	It's over.
	She's a nut.
	Leave her alone.
	Yes, they're making this shit way fucking harder than it has to be.
	There goes Cornelius.
	He came out of the house.
	Cornelius is now.
	Yeah, he's working for another fucking department.
	All right.
	Look at that big fucking head of his.
	Maybe she's wanted for fashion crimes with that outfit.
	It looks like Florida.
	You got to see the amount of people down there last week.
	They were fucking absolutely disgusting without shirts on was unfucking believable.
	I would have been like a fucking Adonis in Florida.
	So she's not even the worst person I would have seen.
	Where were you in Florida?
	Pompano Beach.
	Cocaine City.
	What's that near?
	It's near like Fort Lauderdale.
	We flew into West Palm.
	Oh, okay.
	You said it was.
	It's the BBI.
	Give it a bit more.
	Disorderly conduct.
	All right, what is disorderly conduct?
	Please define it.
	And I'd like to see it on video the disorderly conduct, so you have proof.
	It's their word over mine.
	They are citizens.
	I am a citizen.
	So we are equal.
	So I need a video camera to see what I have done.
	I want concrete evidence on a video camera to see what I've done.
	You're choosing their word over my word.
	So I need it on a video camera to look at it.
	Can I see it on video?
	Okay, so this is interesting.
	We're going to find out what started all this.
	Yeah, but the officer, it's their store.
	They don't have to explain that to her.
	Just get her the fuck out of there.
	They won't let her leave.
	She tries to leave a bunch of times and they block her.
	The cops are being, you know, the cops aren't being, you know, these Florida cops.
	No, they're thirsty today.
	Well, that's the problem is everybody doesn't deal with shit and they don't know how this shit can stuff.
	So they really fucking are like, well, we're going to arrest this fucking all-white bitch.
	We're going to get a number.
	We're going to have to get a gigantic bottle and stuff it in a.
	You can't put the genie back in the bottle.
	Look how sloppy her titties are, though.
	Well, she's 63 years old.
	How do you know she's 63?
	I can carbon date her tits.
	Okay.
	Wow, is that Scottish skill?
	Come in here.
	You can speak to the supervisor when they get.
	So who's the supervisor?
	He's on his way here.
	Is he a police?
	Yes, he is.
	Okay, well, all I'm asking is in concrete language, tell me the legal thing I have done wrong.
	Okay, let me explain to you, ma'am.
	I've just explained it to you just minutes before.
	So they are asking you to leave.
	They say you are causing a disturbance.
	I'm going to get my lawyer.
	What's your name, please?
	My name is Officer Carter.
	Okay, Carter, and what is your name?
	Can I have your cards?
	Zinneman, I'll release you.
	They want you to ban from the store.
	Right, and I'm going to talk to my lawyer and get you fired.
	So don't touch me.
	I didn't break anything.
	You done fucked up.
	Like, she wants to leave.
	Let her fucking leave.
	It's easier to do with her outside anyway because there's nobody, you know, people aren't walking past you.
	Like, what the fuck are you doing, Officer Carter, with your dumb fucking earbud?
	Like, just let her fucking leave and call it a day.
	Go back to drinking fucking ice coffee in your patrol car, you fucking retard.
	She was hot stuff in 1980.
	Maybe.
	I don't know.
	That face is very, like, big and rectangular.
	I have a right to defend myself under the Constitution.
	This goes on forever.
	But I wanna see, go up to the, scroll forward and get to the black girl who made the complaint.
	No, you're way too far forward.
	You should make longer, fucking, longer videos.
	Did they actually lock her up?
	You make this a three-hour show.
	Yeah.
	Oh, that's fucking both.
	They have low IQ cops.
	Better to you because he's telling me that he's not going to give me a legal explanation.
	She's ruined a perfectly good outfit for her.
	Did she turn around and put that number?
	Go back a bit.
	That's not the first time she underdates because you are obstructing the Constitution of the United Mr. Carter.
	Many have lost the statue.
	Tell me what she can't even step back here.
	She didn't have that fucking mask on.
	She'd be hot.
	Oh, I don't want you happing me because you look like you got HBO with that.
	You got that mask on.
	Didn't she turn around and pull another customer?
	No.
	That's not the first time she's gonna get that in here.
	Tell me everybody that wear masks.
	You plus a customer, and it's been done happen before.
	It caused a disturbance.
	So you published.
	She said you probably got HBO.
	What the fuck is HBO?
	Human body odor.
	She probably got fucking bird flu.
	Who knows?
	But when you've been on a pirate ship for a couple of months, you're gonna be a little bit more.
	You want to do something if the shoe was on the other foot.
	If she was a black lady coming in saying that woman wouldn't do nothing.
	Well, that's actually what this woman says.
	That she gets into the racial parts of it.
	She goes, It's kind of like the most dangerous fucking.
	Because I'm dressed like Cindy Lauper.
	An angry black female means that you're going to lock it.
	Just because I'm a girl that wants to have fun.
	Yeah.
	Look at fucking Jasmine Crockett.
	That's Jasmine Crockett if she worked at a Kroger's.
	Jasmine Kojak.
	Slavery Crockett.
	All right.
	That's enough of that, I guess.
	Yeah, we're over this one.
	Okay.
	Yeah, they cuff her and everything.
	Throw her in the fucking truck.
	We've been getting some emails since we started here.
	I don't have these flagged, Sean.
	I assume they just show up in.
	Yeah, they do.
	Hey, Gavin and Sean and the boys, we all know, I know we all hate these assholes who harass cops with trivial bullshit, but holy fuck, this detective brings in $198,000 just in overtime, blocking traffic at movie premieres.
	For the cops, is this on par with their OT in New York?
	What was a good year for them in terms of OT Hall?
	Oh, my God.
	So, Nourochell, I'll send you.
	There's a fucking website.
	You guys can all look it up.
	It's called See-Through NY, See-Through New York.
	And it exposes World Public Service.
	It exposes how much we've made in the last year.
	If you look at the city of Nourochelle, what these guys have made, you'll be fucking sick to your stomach.
	They earned, not made, earned.
	Earned whatever.
	300 fucking.
	There's multiple guys.
	Over 300,000.
	Patrol officer.
	Now patrol officers, there's, I got to stay.
	I got to pay me.
	One lieutenant, one detective.
	But he was a detective in CIU.
	So he was technically on patrol.
	But the amount of fucking money you make, the problem with what you got to understand is he's not being paid by this.
	He's being paid by the city, but the city is getting reimbursed for all of that overtime based on the company that's going to be.
	And the VIG.
	The company that is hiring.
	And the VIG.
	And the VIG, the company that is hiring him.
	So if you go into Nurse Show, these guys are directing traffic.
	You're like, all right, the city's paying him.
	The city is not paying them.
	Conet is paying them.
	They're paying a hard fucking 50 bucks an hour.
	They don't do that in New York City.
	Conet doesn't pay for that.
	They won't do that.
	No.
	But generally, like this movie premiere thing, the movie company is paying the city for a company.
	They've got to be paying the city to do that.
	There's no way.
	And there's a big, like in New Jersey, these cops, they don't get a lot of overtime and it's not counted towards their pension, but they do a lot of road work.
	So every single time they do any road work, a tree falls down or whatever it is, there's two or three cops.
	They'll pull for cops from other places.
	That was my next question.
	Was that pensionable in newer shows?
	That's why I love it.
	New Jersey, it's not?
	It's not pensionable.
	Your overtime is not pensionable in New Jersey.
	So otherwise they're getting a separate tech.
	It's like working.
	They'll use the same check.
	They just, but like PSENG is paying and they're paying a VIG.
	So you may be getting $80 an hour, but PSENG is paying an apartment $115 an hour.
	Well, no.
	So don't cry about.
	For instance, in Nourochelle, there's no way the city's not getting paid for that.
	Nourishll, when I retired, I was making for those jobs to direct the traffic, I'd make $98 an hour.
	Holy shit.
	Yeah, but that wasn't even my hourly rate.
	My hourly rate was $120.
	So I'd make $98 an hour.
	The city would charge ConEd $150 an hour.
	Con Ed would pay me $98.
	Then they would pay 19% on top of that to the city for my fringe benefits, meaning my medical, my pension.
	In case you get hurt, and then the city would keep the rest.
	So it would be $120 towards me.
	I would collect 98 of it, then get completely fucked in my asking taxes.
	And then they would take the rest.
	So when a rookie does it, they're making $47 an hour, and the city is getting a fucking $100 an hour out of them.
	So in Westchester, it's a big fucking scam.
	It's a scam.
	Oh, my God.
	We had him my last year before I retired, 66,000 hours of overtime.
	We only have 100 and fucking 60 person department.
	Holy shit.
	Well, let's check in on Detective Robert Rand with the LAPD here.
	Okay, fuck it.
	Base pay, $146.
	Overtime, $178.
	Other pay, $18,000.
	Total, $343.
	Basically, $1,000 a day.
	Good for him.
	There goes Rand making it overtime.
	I'm sure the city is In overtime right there.
	There's no way he's getting a lot of money.
	I wish I could hear what they're saying.
	He's just in overtime last year.
	They're really policing the city of LA.
	Go back to the beginning, John.
	Can you do that?
	Yeah, I just got to restart.
	One thing I can say, he's got about 20 years on a job.
	If you look at his chevrons.
	Okay, can you guys please let's hear the video.
	There goes Rand making it overtime.
	$196,000 a year.
	Overtime right there.
	Jay Furtison making $196,000 a year.
	We haven't seen each other for a while.
	$196,000 a year.
	It's great.
	Just in overtime last year.
	You're really pleasing the city of L.A. $342,000 you made total last year, but $196,000.
	Actually, you make as much as the governor.
	In overtime.
	The governor makes $260,000 a year.
	You make almost that just enough left.
	You're really milking the city.
	You know what the best part about it is?
	You don't live in L.A. We both know that.
	We live down here.
	It's down southwest.
	Come on, Dale.
	That's a nice little house.
	We planted some tree sauce off four or five years ago.
	Yeah, that's taxpayer money right there.
	Biggest ballpayer green right here.
	To make that mental return, he's got to be there.
	In New Rochelle, it would be 2,200 hours, 2,300 hours.
	We only work 1,800 hours in a year.
	So you're working fucking, you know, it doesn't sound like a lot, but it's eight hours a day for away from his family.
	He's obviously not eating correctly.
	He's two years in one, two and a half years in one to make that.
	Now, listen, I'm not saying he's fucking killed.
	It's probably his last year and he's getting it up there for the past.
	I'm not saying he's got a shovel, but he's standing there and he's responsible for everything that happens there.
	So some bullshit happens, there's a fight, there's a fucking dispute, there's a terrorist attack.
	He's the guy standing there.
	That's what you're paying for.
	We got another email from JB.
	He says, why isn't Maddie talking?
	Rough day.
	Is he sad about something?
	No, he is sad.
	Look at his fucking hair.
	He don't want to be on camera.
	He got upset about food this morning.
	Maddie was worried that I was going to force him to give everybody a blowjob.
	No, that would never have happened.
	That's the only reason why I came today.
	Well, the big argument was he's going to spit it out.
	He was supposed to cook today and he didn't.
	No, he's not supposed to cook today.
	So I figured if he's not cooking, give it your blowjob.
	Yeah, all right.
	Come over here.
	See how long you're going to take.
	All right, all right.
	Now this fucking party's starting.
	That actually brings us to our next email.
	Ask Big John, hey, Gav, besides Big John kissing Stiggs, can you ask him what he does for his hair growth?
	Is it Stiggs jizz?
	If so, I might need a supply.
	You can sell your jizz.
	Did you see that video?
	Can you bend down and look at his fucking hairline?
	My jizz is terrible.
	I just got my jizz checked.
	There's no fucking swimmers, so.
	No?
	No, it's completely fucking dead.
	Why?
	Because I take testosterone.
	Oh, I didn't know that.
	It stops you producing sperm.
	Yeah, it's completely testosterone.
	They call it male contraceptive.
	My fucking swimmers are dead as fuck.
	You still get a load coming out, though, right?
	But I can bench press a lot.
	Oh, yeah, I can shoot a load.
	It's fine.
	He's willing to take on.
	Does the load look like every other load?
	Or is it like less white?
	Well, you got to speak a lot or I'm fucking dead.
	Does your load look like every other load or is it like less white?
	No, no, it's the same color.
	It's just it's not as not as fucking not as full.
	It's not a Ron Jeremy fucking boom.
	You know, I mean, he used to paint pictures.
	Daddy, what does it look like?
	I have no idea.
	What does the baby batter look like?
	It looks very thin.
	Does it look like when you make the yolk on the egg?
	Okay, this last one here from people watching live.
	Sovereign citizen talks to cop like a cop.
	This is a very old video.
	I don't know why.
	I think we've actually played it on the show.
	But let's give it the time of day.
	I'm sure we covered this, right?
	Yeah, we'll see.
	Stop me if you've heard this, as my dad always says when he tells a story.
	It's fucking windy out.
	It's cold out tonight, you hear it?
	Yeah.
	Good thing I turned the water off.
	What's the temp?
	35?
	That's not bad.
	All right.
	Oh, we've seen this a million times.
	Yeah, right?
	You covered this, Dave.
	Yes.
	What's this about?
	Is that a problem?
	Yeah, well, this is a police officer parking line.
	That is.
	Oh.
	Who are you?
	I'm Detective Mike Jardine.
	Oh, yeah?
	What are you working on?
	Right now, I'm in the city.
	What are you working on?
	Why you're in several cases.
	Okay.
	Breaking into cars.
	Yeah, we've seen this, Dave.
	Do you not watch the show?
	I don't fault people who don't watch every single show.
	But if you are that person, don't send in fucking video ideas.
	Okay?
	Hey, Rolling Stone, you should do a thing on fucking British fucking garage music.
	We did.
	Oh, I don't read Rolling Stone, so I just thought you should.
	Do you read Rolling Stone?
	I did as a kid.
	Let's just do a brief female cops before we take calls.
	And Sean, if the calls don't work this time, hell hast no fury like a Gavin scorned.
	You're my drinks later.
	You're fucked up.
	The microphones are dead.
	These are dead here.
	You know that, right?
	They're fine.
	You can hear them.
	No, no, no.
	I'm no good.
	Can I get a course?
	Is that what they're saying?
	Can we get some more fucking whiskey, please, Matt?
	Since you're not talking.
	Yeah.
	Matty's upset.
	Why are you upset?
	What's your problem?
	Upset?
	We're in there.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	Yeah, yeah.
	All right, so we gave...
	Here, put that on your tab.
	What the fuck am I?
	What am I, black?
	We gave the pole dancer a lot of attention.
	By the way, you know what was annoying in the Oscars?
	They talk about that woman who was a stripper, and they keep calling her a sex worker.
	Yeah.
	If you're a stripper, you're not really a sex worker.
	You're not a prostitute.
	You're just a dancer.
	I'm a stripper don't suck dick in the back.
	I mean, any strippers watching the show, tell me, please do you not suck dick in the back?
	I would say a female worker.
	I'm not saying it's a terrible dick.
	I'm just simply saying, please don't pretend you're not a cocksucker.
	Well, when you get to the nicer clubs, they don't do shit.
	They just dance around.
	And in New York City, they don't even show their tits anymore.
	I thought this was a great example of a female.
	I don't have a good job because he's being a little boring.
	Oh, oh.
	Yeah, I guess go.
	You're right.
	I'm good, Maddie.
	Thank you.
	There's no joke.
	You should have drink it last time, you're fucking sad.
	I sip it.
	I don't fucking sip it.
	Shalom.
	I sip it.
	I'm a gentleman.
	Shalom.
	Shalom, niggas.
	Isn't that a true thing?
	No, it's a true thing.
	This is the three episode.
	Watch the epithets.
	You gotta say, La Hium.
	I thought this was a great example of female cops at the job.
	Someone throws a dog out their window.
	It's one of the few times I've seen a female cop really spring to action.
	He's gonna live.
	You don't think his dog's gonna live?
	He needs to go to the doctor.
	He's literally breathing.
	He's choking.
	He threw him.
	He's in shock.
	He's bleeding from the mouth.
	He's breathing, though.
	He's breathing.
	He's not responding.
	I love the music.
	Totally fine with this.
	Okay.
	Oh, yeah.
	See?
	She saved him.
	Thanks.
	I'm not saying it's bad.
	I'm just saying this is the few times they really.
	I wouldn't cry, but I would probably do the same thing.
	But I'm sure.
	See, we do need female cops.
	Yeah, they save kids.
	To save cute little doggies.
	That's about all they do.
	They bring donuts to kids.
	That's another thing female cops are great at.
	Donuts.
	Donuts.
	I want donuts.
	Are you going to share your donuts?
	You're going to take me to mommy now?
	A toddler called 911 and asked for donuts, and of course, the female dispatcher and the female cops can't wait to bring them.
	Have you ever seen a fucking female dispatcher?
	You called us about donuts.
	We came to the bottom.
	She looks like Maddie.
	She's dumb as the lady in the last video.
	She looks like Maddie.
	Maddie with worse fucking hair.
	Throw was black, has been my experience.
	That would be nice.
	And they post anti-cop shit on Facebook.
	It would be nice if they locked up the mother for fucking letting the kids make the phone calls.
	Yeah.
	Although one time my four-year-old called the cops because his babysitter wouldn't let him watch cartoons.
	And they came over and they beat the shit out of her.
	He got terrible parents, that's why.
	Jeffrey Madry's world keeps crumbling.
	John Madry, what is he doing now?
	He's got to be back.
	His 30 days is up.
	So we did a whole thing, John and I, on the Cosby kids, right?
	It was Kaz Doherty, Jeffrey Madry, and.
	He don't look like somebody would sexually harass anybody.
	I mean, I don't believe a fucking.
	Come on, baby.
	But now we have two more female cops close to Chief Madry, raked in massive overtime and other perks, which really, I think we all know what that means.
	They let him eat their asses.
	He ate their groceries, as the ghetto kids say.
	The nut side of his fucking shit.
	Nope.
	I mean, he's racist.
	There's no white girls that he's sexually harassed.
	At least he sticks within his race.
	I'm okay with that.
	More female officers who disgraced top cop Jeffrey Madri's orbit pulled down massive overtime and other perks.
	The driver pulled in an eye-popping $163K in overtime alone, and she resigned days.
	A lot of driving.
	Days after the post exposed her alleged sleazy conduct at police headquarters.
	And then, of course, you have Detective Ingrid Sanders, who was the seventh highest overtime owner in the department, boosting her total salary to $350,000.
	Again, $1,000 a day.
	If you're going to suck his big black cock, you might as well fucking get paid for it.
	Yeah.
	I want $400,000 while I'm doing that.
	I would let him eat my ass for $350,000.
	In overtime or total?
	Would you blow him for $400,000 a year?
	Like once a week?
	How many times?
	He's going to want it once a day.
	I'm going to need a lot more than that.
	I got a strong chance.
	And you're a wordsmith, too.
	Yep.
	The one beneath, the one at the bottom looks like a Maasai Warrior from fucking Southern Africa.
	So I don't know who wants a fuck that one.
	A Maasai Warrior.
	Yeah, that one with the African shit.
	That's Quintisha.
	She looks like fucking She fought the fucking British in the 1870s.
	She's one of those Choctazulus.
	Yeah, exactly.
	Yeah, that's Quintisha, boys.
	That's the one.
	You know what her name is?
	Her name is Nilaka.
	Okay.
	You know that's Quintisha, right?
	For the third time?
	Gavin's had enough of it.
	I forgot this is a free fucking thing.
	I don't know who's watching this shit.
	Fourth time.
	Do you know who that is?
	No.
	Oh, yeah, she's my friend.
	For the fourth time, that is Quinticia.
	That is the one that was on the front page of the post.
	The size of her fucking forehead.
	Go back up to the African picture.
	That's the one who raked in like more hours in overtime than there are hours in a day.
	She started this whole thing.
	All right, next video.
	And then we'll dare to look into calls.
	Somebody dropped a dime on her.
	that's what happened.
	He was making all that overtime and she probably, or he wasn't swallowing the cock and sent, just like the cop from the 4-4, sent that fucking...
	Wow.
	Which one?
	Good for her.
	No.
	The poor kid.
	The biggest fucking hater of women cops other than me are other cops.
	And I hate them for the reason that they're incompetent.
	They hate them because they're females and they're getting any more attention than them.
	So, speaking of females, look how inept this woman is.
	You're going to have to blow it up.
	She's in the top right as far as the mob of cops go.
	And the guy that they're fighting had a gun.
	But the cameraman is like, yo, police brutality.
	But there was two individuals resisting, and they were both armed.
	So you better fucking win this fight or you're going to die.
	Bigger.
	All right.
	Now let's see.
	I'm telling you what, what the fuck, what the fuck, what the fuck, what the fuck, Look at her punch.
	Oh, my God.
	All you're doing is she's trying.
	Listen, I give her a little credit for fucking trying.
	Not running down the street.
	Yeah, she's in there.
	She's mixing up.
	She's trying.
	She's not good.
	She's useless.
	She shouldn't be there, but she's fucking trying.
	I definitely give her credit.
	People always freak out when they see cops punching.
	They don't realize that is part of their training.
	Yeah, you're allowed to punch.
	You're allowed to punch.
	It's a great way to reboot someone's hard drive, too, when they're misplaced.
	Yeah, well, it is.
	I was fighting a guy on Pelham Road, which is a nurse shell, and I had a female with me, and she fucking literally stood 10 feet behind me.
	And I'm wrestling.
	Someone has to be the OSHA officer.
	Yeah, he was drunk, and he was in EDP.
	We were fighting.
	We were throwing punches.
	You know, was I an imminent threat of death?
	No.
	But I'm struggling with a guy in the middle of the fucking street.
	Well, he could get your gun.
	Yeah.
	But, you know, he wasn't trying that.
	You know, we're wrestling.
	It was thankfully, but she wouldn't fucking come help me.
	Like, literally, we're in the middle of a struggle and I'm a fucking big dude and I can't handle this guy.
	And thank God a county cop was fucking driving past me to go to Glen Island.
	He stopped and got out and helped me wrestle this fucking guy.
	You know, I'm not trying to throw punches at him.
	It was at a point where I could punch him out, you know, where I could do that.
	So I'm trying to overpower him and not be brutal.
	But this bitch was fucking standing behind me, dancing with a baby.
	Why did you give her 20 years on a job?
	I don't want to tell you she died of cancer.
	Oh, she got revenge.
	But yeah, she died of fucking cancer.
	Was she smoking when she was smoking?
	She was smoking while you were wrestling.
	She was smoking while she had cancer.
	She didn't give a fuck.
	Let me know when you need help.
	Here's a gay question.
	So you're wrestling a guy, and as you're on the ground, it wears out the elbows of your shirt.
	Every fight you get in, you're getting holes in your shirt, especially a dress shirt.
	So, what do you do now?
	You get a new one, or they go fix it, or they throw it in the garbage.
	We get a uniform allowance every year.
	Yeah, we always got that.
	No, you wear them out.
	So, you throw it in the garbage.
	No, no, no.
	You wear them.
	No, you wear that till it's fucking dirty.
	There's holes in the elbows.
	That's fine.
	Nothing wrong with that.
	When the sergeant tells you to go upstairs and put a different shirt on, that's when you got to throw it out.
	We got our uniform allowance the second check of the year, which was generally the end of January, which is just before the Super Bowl.
	So every fucking check went to one of my Super Bowl pools.
	It was perfect.
	It's $1,000.
	We got $1,500.
	Fuck.
	All right, let's see this fight.
	She's getting fired.
	She's getting fired.
	She got fired.
	I'm going to call him.
	I'm gonna call this.
	Get out of the car!
	No, I'm gonna say car!
	Wait, wait, wait, wait!
	Wait, wait, wait!
	I need tasing him.
	I need to tasing him.
	She's in there.
	I mean, he's not resisting.
	Y'all niggas is wilding.
	Y'all niggas is wild.
	You got impression.
	Tony right there is getting fired.
	She's punching him in the face.
	This asshole's punching him.
	Y'all niggas is.
	I'm not putting him nowhere.
	I'm not putting him nowhere.
	Make me.
	All right.
	I've only seen it happen a few times.
	That don't matter.
	That's why we got him because of y'all.
	Niggas got fucked.
	Maybe the drive's done.
	The drive of the paint compliance is fucked up.
	Can you shoot somebody?
	I had one guy, I shot him with the taser, and he took the things out and he was whipping them around.
	He shot all over the place.
	You didn't get a good connection.
	The problem is if there's a his AIDS blood flying through the air.
	If you don't get a gift.
	I never use it again.
	If they have the bubble jackets and shit and they don't go through or they have a sweatshirt.
	No, this guy was completely naked running down the street.
	Did John fuck him?
	He was running to John.
	What were you doing over there, Gabby?
	I was masturbating.
	Florida Deputy shoots herself in the leg.
	This is a great one.
	I think I've seen it.
	Yeah.
	We sold it.
	I probably stole it from the chat.
	Or did we show it on the show?
	We just did it on the show.
	The female cop shoots the guy in the leg.
	herself, I think.
	Oh.
	There's no...
	There's no video on this line.
	According to people commenting on the county's Facebook page, it discovered that she was using the bathroom.
	This is just text.
	Velucia.
	Oh, different.
	A VSO deputy was injured by an accidental self-inflicted gunshot to the leg around 1 p.m. today at Walmart.
	This is December 8th, 2024.
	Deputies on scene rendered aid until EMS arrived and transported her by ground to an area hospital for treatment.
	Glad she's okay.
	All right.
	It's a pattern.
	Hanging her fucking job.
	Let's compare that to this one with the female cop not having a bullet in the chamber and male cops having to come to save her.
	This should be our last one.
	No round in the chamber.
	Come on, ladies.
	Oh, there we go.
	There we go.
	Turn it up.
	Get your.
	Put your hands down.
	Put your hands out.
	Put your hands out.
	Oh, yeah, because that's the bike.
	Yeah, we did.
	We don't know anything.
	Put your hands out.
	Is she running away?
	I haven't seen this one.
	You weren't here then.
	You okay?
	I am.
	I'm okay.
	Guys, you're okay because you ran away, you fucking stand by, stand by.
	Stand by, stand by.
	Put your hands up.
	Trace him.
	Oh, he lost his life.
	Glad somebody showed up.
	He was chasing her.
	Okay, I take it back.
	I know John's done it, but you guys, I used to hit people with the car.
	I know it's against department policy.
	I mean, if it's deadly.
	If you were running, I would hit you.
	Deadly physical force is deadly physical force.
	You got to do whatever you can to fucking stop them.
	But when you're getting out of the car, the guy's got a knife in the street.
	Running?
	You know what happened to us?
	We had a fucking Lincoln town car that we used as an undercover car.
	So we would have a sergeant in a car with a Kel monitoring a buy-in bus.
	We'd have an undercover going out making a buy.
	They would give us a description of people that were buying from the guys selling.
	And we would follow them off like three or four blocks away.
	So we're in a Lincoln town car up in Washington Heights on 181 in Wasworth.
	And like, there he goes right over there.
	It was a white guy.
	And we both jump out of the car.
	And I'm driving.
	And I realize I left a fucking car and drive.
	And it hit like fucking six cars and we're running after it.
	And eventually we get back in it.
	We just fucking zoop.
	She kept moving.
	And if your car got hit in Washington Heights, it was this car in 1976.
	1997, maybe?
	I was in college.
	Fucking oh magic.
	All right, I'm scared to do this, but I think we're here, folks.
	We're going to try the phones.
	The phones?
	So they're perfect.
	Sorry about that.
	Do you want to stop driving before you get an accident?
	Yes, I will pass.
	I will pass.
	I think we're all equally nervous here.
	Sean's had a week to rectify the problem.
	400.
	Anytime that you have any downtime this week, Sean, you could just have friends call in.
	Yep.
	Our tech guys.
	When the fuck would this guy have downtime?
	905?
	Where would he find a friend?
	We're going live.
	Have you seen his fucking hair?
	Hello?
	905.
	I'm here to jive.
	905, you're fucking live.
	Can you hear us?
	Yes, sir.
	Whoa.
	Can you hear me?
	All systems are go.
	Yes, Maddie.
	Nice.
	I'm amazed.
	So it's your favorite drunk driver calling back again.
	I got a question for the cops.
	Wait, are you the guy who came up with this brilliant plan where you drink beers that look like your beer, but they're soft drinks?
	Yes, but I have a completely different question.
	Cops go, I've never pulled anyone over because I saw them drinking a beer.
	But this is a completely new tip I got.
	Are you the guy who comes all the way in from Canada to go to meet and greets at Nita Fashions?
	Multiple times.
	Yes, that's me.
	You have a tattoo of me.
	Yeah, your autograph on my leg.
	I remember you.
	I'm actually happy you remember me.
	Okay.
	So here's my question.
	So I saw on a TikTok video.
	Sorry, sorry.
	I was reading a Harvard peer-reviewed study in the library that said something that cops, if they pull you over, they can't search sealed mail.
	So my plan is, if this is true, is you have like a box that's ready to go to the mail and it's open and you got tape.
	And if you're getting pulled over, you like throw your open beer in the box, tape it shut.
	And if they can't search it, then.
	Buddy, are you fucking serious?
	That retarded question?
	Are you really going to have that much fucking time?
	It takes me all fucking eight seconds to walk from my car to your car.
	You're going to really fucking keep moving around that car.
	There's the sirens and the pullover and then the parking.
	Let me answer this question.
	So if you're moving around in the car, you're real squirrel, you're dipping underneath the seat, everything else, you're raising my suspicion that you may be doing something or concealing something.
	So my first inclination is, is I'm going to look for what you were doing.
	So yeah, there's a sealed box.
	If you were able to contain, I have anything inside the vehicle.
	Yeah, isn't this beer dripping into your box and like leaking at the corners?
	Garen, I think the bigger question is when you go into this fucking library, are you carrying a box of napkins with you?
	Are you masturbating when you were listening?
	Who reads the fucking Harvard Review?
	That's my joke, John.
	If you had watched the book, I always say, never say you saw something on TikTok.
	Say, I was reading in a Harvard peer review.
	That's the second joke you stole from Gavin tonight.
	No, this guy stole it.
	No, he's not.
	John was going to heard.
	I thought he was being legit.
	All right.
	Thanks for calling.
	That's yet another terrible idea.
	No wonder you moved back in with the home.
	Don't fucking do that.
	Just drink and drive.
	Drink it home.
	Yeah, just drink and drive.
	Well, just put it under the seat.
	Yeah, YOLO, motherfucker.
	Every time Doc Gooden would get caught with Coke in his car, you're just like, it would be on the passenger seat sitting there like he was taking it for a drive.
	Like a bag of Coke is this big, you can't fucking jam it by your seat or hide it somewhere?
	Swallow it.
	What a moron.
	Put it in your ass.
	And by the way, he's been swallowing.
	Look him up on Wikipedia.
	Doc Gooden has been pulled over for driving Wawai on Coke with the Coke visible like 15 times.
	And the most recent one is like 2018.
	Come on, Doc.
	God bless him.
	He likes the party.
	Why can't he get a driver?
	Because he's broken.
	Well, he's like, Richard, didn't like Paris Hilton get arrested for DWI or something?
	They don't want to pay the money.
	They're too cheap.
	Fucking get a driver.
	Okay.
	208, you're feeling great.
	208, you're here.
	Don't be late.
	Mikey!
	Mikey!
	Come on, man!
	Just fucking leave.
	Just go somewhere else.
	Just fucking leave.
	Shut the fuck up and leave.
	What's this from?
	It's a great drop that Sean can't.
	That's another inside joke that we're not privy to.
	Well, you clearly don't watch this show.
	I watch the show all the time, but I'm too busy listening to fucking Anthony.
	Come on, man.
	Can you play them?
	Sean has trouble with drops.
	It's maybe coming next.
	He's learning.
	But let's see if he can learn.
	Sean's doing great.
	Sean's doing great.
	Okay.
	What's up, guys?
	Wait, let's see if Sean can do the drop, though.
	Let's see it.
	How's it coming, Sean?
	All right, Sean's a little fucking retarded, but he's not.
	Isn't that just a bunch?
	Dude, fucking call Mikey.
	Oh, that's not it, though.
	Yeah, dude.
	That's one of the...
	Play another one.
	Come on.
	Fucking call Mikey.
	I know how she feels.
	I remember doing a lot of blowing.
	And it's clearly like 8 a.m.
	Yeah.
	And you know what?
	What sucks about her situation?
	She was like, don't worry, I'll go.
	I'll get Mikey and then I'll get a new eight ball and we'll be good to go.
	So in her head, she already had the blow.
	And then when she gets there, it hadn't occurred to her that Mikey might not be home.
	Come on, man.
	Mikey.
	Oh, no, he's asleep.
	He's sleeping.
	She said, come back later.
	She's like, I'm sweating my balls off.
	And he's like, you have balls?
	And in her defense, she's like 20 feet from the cocaine she wants.
	It's right fucking there.
	Yeah, she could see it.
	See, it's in the cutlery drawer underneath the cutlery.
	Mikey!
	I saw people around cocaine this weekend, and I can attest to her desire for it.
	It was fucking unreal.
	Were they doing this with the jaw?
	Dude, they were fucking grinding their teeth.
	I can't believe they have teeth left.
	I was impressed by the amount of cocaine I saw this weekend.
	I'm fucking jealous and impressed.
	The show was involved.
	Like, would it be all of, would it be those cans, but cocaine?
	What's that?
	Those cans in front of you surf sides.
	They had fucking pouches.
	It wasn't like little, little tiny bags.
	It was fucking pouches.
	Pouches that lasted like two days.
	Like, how many cocaine, people doing cocaine have enough cocaine that lasts them two days?
	I was like, holy fuck.
	Two days with a bunch of people is this much cocaine.
	Maddie, could you help us out?
	It was quite a bit of cocaine.
	Agreed.
	My motto was always, the bag's got to be big enough to make it there and back, and then some.
	Ooh.
	These people didn't sleep for fucking three days.
	It was quite the experience.
	And I'm not against it.
	Don't get me wrong.
	So you're dozing away.
	So you go to bed.
	And you notice, too, I've been around people like that.
	You go to bed, you wake up, and it's the same person, But they're much uglier.
	And they're still awake.
	Yeah, and they just keep getting uglier and uglier over the course of the three days.
	So, some handsome couple would just be these fucking skells.
	And they would take fucking like hour and a half naps and they'd be completely rejuvenated.
	It was awesome.
	All right.
	Sorry, caller.
	We got carried away there.
	No, no problem.
	Hey, I just wanted to see if Sean can pull up that train pick from last week because I want to know what the cops and Maddie think about it because it's absolutely fucking insane.
	The train pick?
	You mean the train screen?
	Yeah, so the jumping over the track thing, I don't think that it's a retard scenario.
	I think with the cops there, I think we start with the premise that they're not all retards.
	What is the reason for those truck things going over that hose?
	Those are for fucking...
	I texted it to every fireman I ever met.
	You're asking a lot out of Sean.
	But email is better, Sean?
	Yeah, email is good.
	Well, come on, dude.
	You know what they're for.
	They're for cars.
	They don't want cars damaging the hose.
	So they put those over the road so with your car, you can drive over them.
	And they work great for cars.
	Cars, which weight?
	What does a car weigh?
	A ton?
	Two tons?
	They're not that heavy.
	I've seen people lift them.
	A mom can lift it if her baby's underneath.
	So in high school, we used to lift them.
	We'd get a teacher's car and we'd go, one, two, three.
	And with four guys, you can move a car like in the middle of a football field.
	Yeah, you guys said Canada must have been fun.
	Man, I'm jealous of you.
	Oh, man.
	Oh, man.
	Would you take the English teacher's car to the football field, eh?
	Oh, my God.
	We're going to get some extra maple syrup here.
	That's a good prank.
	We also had...
	All right, you guys just hurt my feelings.
	Really, really gay.
	We also had a game called Boomerang Death, where if you whip a boomerang the wrong way, it goes along the grass like ticket, ticket, ticket, ticket, ticket.
	Oh, wow.
	And it'll fuck you up if you get hit with one.
	No, this explains why you're such a fucking retard.
	Here in New York, they shoot at each other at nine millimeters.
	Damn fucking.
	So these, this is.
	Well, no, not that.
	You had it.
	No, Sean, we don't want to see how the cake is made.
	So this caller, we brought this up during the competency.
	Yeah, I don't think that works for trains.
	Yeah, it's not going to work for the train.
	So, sir, I don't know why you made this call because there's no secret here.
	There's no, you're not missing anything.
	This guy doesn't get that trains are not cars.
	It's that simple.
	He's probably a volunteer.
	But there's got to be some reason for him to do that because they're fucking retarded.
	Because they're morons.
	I just told you the reason.
	He thinks the one retard, like, you've got to have four retards in that specific start leading the other four.
	The train.
	No, no, the three other guys are busy, and they're like, so just get the hose from there and bring it across the traffic.
	I mean, obviously there's a working fire because they have a hose hooked up to the track.
	That would hunt above the train.
	They probably radioed train and told him to shut the fucking train service down.
	Well, if that's the case, why do you put the fucking thing over it?
	Well, I can't speak for that, but.
	Yeah, I think it's just one retard, and they didn't see him do that.
	And then after they put the fire out, they come back and they're going, Randy, are you fucking kidding me?
	We don't do retarded shit like that in New York.
	We just block the fucking streets.
	Nobody can come down.
	Where was that picture taken?
	Was it England?
	I don't think so.
	Does it say on the picture?
	It could be any city USA.
	That's the way firemen are.
	It does not say.
	Remember that 75% of firemen in America are volunteer.
	It doesn't say that.
	I'm trying to make him not retarded.
	No, no, you are fucking trying to do that.
	You know who took that picture?
	A cop.
	I didn't hear that.
	All right.
	Thanks for calling.
	I can't believe we're having functioning calls.
	Do you know why God made cops?
	Firemen could have heroes.
	We were at the gym and the cops were fighting.
	No, firemen were sparring.
	And John goes, hey, they're going to have a jewelry stale after this.
	You can get a cheap Rolex.
	They lay it all out at a card table downstairs.
	I shouldn't even joke because I left the police department.
	I went into the FDNY Academy and I failed out.
	Why?
	I couldn't fit the TV in my boot.
	That's a big TV.
	614?
	I almost fucking bleached.
	614?
	Let's indulge in your lore.
	The cop that left 4-6 went to the fire department and came back.
	614, are you there?
	Columbus, Ohio.
	Yeah, can we talk about how both of them look much bigger than me, and I'm fucking much bigger than both of them?
	Get the fuck out of here.
	This is fucking ridiculous.
	I guess you have a short torso.
	I do have a fucking very large torso.
	Yeah, I thought it's too big.
	This USAID, I don't know if anything.
	Go ahead, Columbus.
	Hello.
	He's not there.
	Not there.
	Go into the next call.
	Did he leave?
	He wasn't there, I guess.
	813, you're here with me.
	Holy fucking shit, there's a fat right there.
	Holy fucking shit, there's a fat right there.
	Wow, that's an oldie.
	I guess that's another inside joke that we don't know about.
	Yeah, start watching all the jokes.
	Not only do you have to watch a show, you got to go back an episode.
	No, that's from like the 70s.
	I was in Costa Rica.
	And there was a ceiling fan.
	My wife and I, the guy who looked after my place up there in Montezuma, he was sort of like a caretaker for all the super rich people.
	And so he goes, hey, I'm looking after this fucking insane mansion and I'm going to go into town for a few days.
	You guys can stay there.
	So we're in this big, fucking huge, awesome place.
	And we're alone in one of the rooms.
	And the ceiling fan's going, and a bat gets in, and I just hear.
	And the ceiling fan hits the bat.
	The bat hits the floor and it's knocked unconscious lying there.
	Big, huge fucking bat.
	And I involuntarily just went, holy fucking shit, there's a bat right there.
	Holy fucking shit, there's a bat right there.
	Nice.
	Did you fuck it?
	I put it in a towel and brought it outside, and eventually it unconcussed and flew away.
	That was Batman.
	A lot of birds you think are dead are just concussed.
	Give them some time.
	Sorry, go ahead.
	See, right now, you know, the difference between Stiggs.
	The reason I was calling is because I'm a server down here in Tampa, and I'm looking for a career.
	I'm almost 25, and I might be having a child out of wedlock soon.
	And I was wondering what Stiggs did when he was about to have a child by accident and what he was doing at the time to make a little extra cash.
	No, no, I was a fucking cop and we were allowed to work overtime.
	So I could obviously just work extra when I was trying to make extra money for my illegitimate kid.
	Thank you for bringing up a fucking horrible thing.
	Talk about fucking a man in your money, you motherfucker.
	No, seriously.
	Do yourself a fucking favor.
	Before you get a real job, have the kid.
	Have a paternity test?
	Well, first off, have a fucking paternity test.
	Don't let this bitch fool you.
	That would be.
	But before you get a real job, have the kid for child support purposes.
	Why?
	All right, so unless you're with her and if you're going to be a good person, but if she's going to try and fucking bury you, no, no, no.
	Be a server.
	No, no.
	We want to get married and everything, but why do you want to go to the house?
	Get a real fucking job.
	What are you talking about?
	What is your question?
	Should I get a job?
	Everyone should have a job.
	Is she a whore and you don't think the kid is yours?
	Like my girl?
	No, no.
	Okay.
	Well, that's not like that.
	Well, they're on two different fucking claims of existence.
	Thanks for calling.
	Okay, I fuck whores.
	Yeah, everyone should have a job for me.
	Hey, I'm having a baby.
	Should I get a job?
	What kind of job should I get?
	I know I'm wondering.
	Unless you fuck whores like I did, please don't call back and ask me for relationship advice.
	I don't know anything about it.
	I would get relationship advice from him.
	What should I do for money?
	Please.
	Or XRP.
	XRP is going through the fucking moon.
	Everyone buy it.
	Yeah.
	601.
	We're having fun.
	Oh, my boys, my boys.
	We're at the end of an age.
	Oh, God.
	What's going on, guys?
	My boy.
	Shoveled up by labor, shot on by Tories.
	48, 45.
	Got a quick question.
	I got a quick story for y'all from Angola.
	Are y'all familiar with the state penitentiary?
	Yes, it is a prison or Angola, the country.
	Where is that?
	Alabama?
	Louisiana.
	It's an old plantation.
	It's tens of thousands of acres in the bend of the Mississippi River.
	So we were installing access control down there, which is badge readers, electronic locks.
	And I remember a few weeks ago, Gavin, you were talking about how much prisoners were getting paid.
	I think whoever the lady is over in California, a Mercedes.
	Yeah, she was saying prison labor is slave labor.
	And I was saying they mostly work for things in the prison.
	And as far as like making license plates that people sell, that's not really that common.
	All right.
	Well, so this is a penal farm.
	And this is a penal farm in Angola.
	And they get paid cents on the hour to work in the field.
	So like 50 cents.
	Yeah, like less than a dollar per hour.
	And it is like stepping back in time there.
	It's a very wild place.
	So it's blacks picking cotton for cents on the dollar?
	Well, it's got that too.
	You know what the lesson is there?
	The lesson for Angola and for people in Louisiana is don't fucking go to jail because you're going to go and pick cotton for 50 cents a fucking hour.
	You know what they're paying those?
	They have incarcerated firemen in California.
	They pay them fucking like five bucks a day or five.
	To go fucking dig fucking, you know, fire trenches and risk their lives.
	And Mercedes says they're always on call and they're basically human fodder.
	Like they're obviously going to be in the front lines of the firefighting.
	And glad they got a lot of people doing life sentences there, too.
	That's amazing.
	They got like 6,000 prisoners there.
	It's massive.
	It's huge.
	And so these guys want to do this.
	Like they want to be part of the crew that goes out because you don't want to be, it's no air conditioning.
	And these barracks, or I mean, I guess you can call them just brick barracks.
	But there was this one trustee guy who was just kind of sweeping up around in one of the areas and with a, let's say, Rubin-esque black female guard.
	And she was running.
	This guy was probably in his 80s and she was running his life like he was her slave.
	I mean, even if he sat down just for a second to kind of just hang out, she'd snap her fingers, come up with my Coca-Cola.
	Wow.
	Was she white?
	She was black, right?
	No, black.
	And the black guy was a slave.
	What were you doing there again?
	The misconception is that white slavery in America, there was over 4,000 blacks that owned slaves.
	Do you know how many guys were fucking freed from slavery and the first thing they did was buy slaves?
	Yeah, it was fucking quite a bit.
	You know how many slaves were freed and they said, can I stay here?
	And they said, okay, I guess I got to pay you now.
	Right.
	There's a famous barber, a famous black barber in Natchez who owned a lot of slaves.
	Natchez, Mississippi.
	I don't get this no AC thing.
	I heard no prisons in Texas have AC.
	It must be 100 degrees at night.
	Well, it fucks it.
	Oh, it is.
	Will that make you not go back?
	You know how much it fucking sucks to sleep, but I didn't.
	You want to fight?
	You want to act up fucking when it's 113 degrees?
	There's no sandwich.
	No C on the deck.
	You just don't want to move.
	You're just standing there.
	God bless you.
	Jesus.
	So you're on a boat, like rocking back and forth in a cot.
	Jesus Christmas.
	No, I'm fucking around.
	We had an AC on the ship.
	What?
	That's a joke?
	Yeah, that was a prank.
	You really had me believe, and you had no AC.
	Oh, what a great joke.
	Hey, I had spaghetti last night.
	I'm beside myself.
	All right, next caller.
	Thanks for calling.
	Thanks, Maddie, for contributing.
	Louisiana, too.
	Texas is dry heat.
	Louisiana is fucking wet, humid heat.
	Mosquitoes, but they're used to that.
	It's like Maddie's vagina.
	Mosquitoes.
	Yeah.
	Moist and warm.
	I would kill myself.
	818.
	818.
	You're the last caller.
	Does this do anything?
	Every call has an inside joke.
	Nice.
	Does this do anything?
	Have you all seen the movie?
	And Commander Ron.
	Commander Ron and the officers, you've seen the movie Full Metal Jacket, right?
	Of course.
	I want to get it over and under before Private Sean Pyle Frags Sergeant Gavin Hartman.
	Over under 90 days.
	Go.
	I'm saying over.
	I'm saying over.
	He's talking about Sean killing me from all this abuse.
	No.
	Oh, Sean's not going to kill you.
	Garrett is gay.
	No.
	I believe the only thing.
	He'll walk out of here.
	I believe the only thing that's going to make Sean better is you fucking with him.
	No, I understand what you're saying, though.
	You got to let up on the kid a little bit.
	He's new.
	Once he comes, like, he's six months in, then it's all enough experience.
	And I got to tell you, one other thing.
	No, thanks for calling.
	You only get one.
	Isn't Brian coming?
	Isn't he just on maternity leave?
	He's coming back in a couple of weeks.
	Yeah, maternity leaves?
	Oh, he got a new job.
	Well, we're about to find out the hard way.
	We'll see.
	Okay, guys, it's 10 o'clock.
	That was a fun show.
	Sean, pull up my Need of Fashions thing again because that'll be fucking embarrassing if I go all the way to DC, get a hotel, and three people.
	I bought a new shirt recently.
	If I had known this, I would have bought your shirt.
	I need some suits because...
	Do they make underwear?
	My dick is small.
	Thongs?
	Do they make tongs?
	Yeah, I'm not in the market for a shirt, Ron.
	What do you mean?
	If I knew I would have bought you a shirt?
	No.
	What I'm saying is that I'm going to use this website tonight.
	I need some shit.
	You Jewcock sucker.
	Well, you know, if you can't make it to any of these dates.
	I'll make it to the Jersey one, but I'm not paying $200.
	So as a host on the show, I should get free.
	Yeah, that's legit.
	You don't got anything in New York?
	You can also, yeah, there's a New York one.
	That's Friday, March 1st.
	I'm going to go to Boston with you.
	March 21st.
	Boston is nice.
	That's in a couple weeks.
	It's in a couple weeks, so we better sell out.
	And there's only room for 15 per thing, or it gets too crowded.
	So book your ticket tonight, or you're fucked.
	Thank you, Ron.
	Thank you, John.
	Thank you, Stiggs.
	Always a pleasure.
	Thank you, Maddie, of course.
	Thanks for nothing, Maddie.
	Yeah, Maddie, you were like totally non-authorized.
	Oh, look at fucking Sean's mustache.
	John, let's see you, Sean.
	No, go back to Sean.
	Look at that fucking dog.
	Look at you.
	That's a hell of a big bro.
	You look like a fucking caterpillar.
	That's a real flavor saver there.
	You look like a budget fucking Mario.
	Stigs, did you know that we had, did you, Yeah, look at all his hairdressers.
	Paul, before we get this, can you tell us about fucking that Tinder girl?
	No.
	Did you eat her ass?
	No, no.
	No, I didn't.
	Oh, get this.
	Get this.
	That was a bit that him and Ryan had worked on for days.
	And the bit is he shows me a picture of like a passable tranny, and he goes, this is my new girlfriend.
	And I go, Sean, that's a dude.
	That was their joke, right?
	But before he went on the date, I go, let's see a picture of her.
	And he goes, I don't have one.
	And I go, yes, you do.
	If you're on a dating app, you must have a picture.
	And he goes, I wrecked the bit.
	I wrecked it.
	Yes, I did.
	David would fuck up.
	That was a bit?
	Oh, God, that was horrible.
	Yeah, he's made one.
	He's had one human interaction.
	He met a black nerd at the bar down the street.
	I did meet a girl.
	Oh.
	Yeah.
	Show your face.
	Okay.
	Can we see a picture?
	No.
	Where'd you meet her?
	Look at your fucking hair, bro.
	You look decent.
	You could probably get pussy except for that fucking mustache.
	That's what the pussy is.
	You walk weird.
	No, the mustache is great.
	You walk like you're walking.
	The mustache is great according to fucking who.
	Like, you don't want to hurt the floor.
	That's how you walk.
	Everyone.
	It gives him some pizzaz.
	You want an angle.
	It also makes him look confident like he doesn't give a shit.
	So where'd you meet this girl?
	On Lower East Side or something like that?
	Lower East Side?
	What do you mean or something like that?
	I don't know the city very well.
	I went to Houston Street?
	How big is your cock?
	Yeah, it was small cock.
	Yeah.
	It was?
	Does she have an animal?
	Where was it at?
	A show?
	A bar.
	What bar?
	I don't remember the name.
	I just went out.
	Do you remember the street?
	I don't remember the street either.
	Do you remember the street?
	No.
	Is this a long distance street?
	Is this a dumb bit?
	No, it's not a dumb bit.
	I just don't know the city very well, and I don't remember.
	So you decided, I'm going to go into the city.
	You took the train to the Lower East Side?
	Yeah.
	What train?
	What number?
	I don't remember.
	The metro.
	This is getting more suspicious.
	So how long does it take you to get to the Lower East Side from here?
	Was it like 45 minutes, an hour or something like that?
	No, it was a Z train.
	It was an hour at least.
	Yeah.
	The Z line.
	And then tell us about You should have told us this earlier.
	So you sit down, you have a beer, and then she's sitting there and you go, hi, I'm Sean.
	Yes, basically that.
	Yep.
	Sam.
	So you did the first line?
	Yeah, pretty much.
	Yeah, I guess so.
	I did.
	And then she said, hi, I'm Rebecca.
	She's Jewish?
	Not really Jewish?
	That's just a hypothetical name.
	She was Eve.
	That was a made-up name.
	Becca.
	And then you guys hit it off?
	Yes, we did.
	Yeah.
	Yep, she's pretty cool.
	Did you tell her that you work here?
	I did.
	Yeah, eventually I did, and she has no problem with it.
	Oh, yeah.
	Did she know who I am?
	Yes, she did.
	Yep.
	How old is she?
	37.
	Oh, so no babies.
	Yeah, I mean, it's probably not very serious, but you know, I live in a closet, so what can you do?
	Yeah.
	So you got her number and everything?
	Yes, I did.
	Why didn't you go back to her place?
	She lives with her ex.
	Oh!
	That's classic Manhattan.
	She has a boyfriend.
	Well, it's so hard to get his place there that they end up staying with their boyfriend.
	Yeah, exactly.
	Are you wearing Montclair sneakers?
	Sticks?
	It's your fucking ex.
	Come on, not get the fuck off.
	It's your active boyfriend.
	Yeah, you fucking retarded.
	Sticks, are you wearing $1,000 sneakers?
	No, no, these are from fucking What's Call?
	Look at these.
	These are Ty Heel figure that fucking thing.
	They make me tall.
	All right, well, that's exciting.
	We'll be interested in hearing where that relationship goes.
	Until next time, get fired.
	Get in trouble.
	Be brave.
	And never stop fighting.
	You guys want a little more?

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