Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - S4E26 - STEVE, HOLD IT!

Aug. 27, 2024 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes

01:42:54

S4E26 - STEVE, HOLD IT!

In this extra-long, free episode we cover our angry super, the Oasis reunion, Megyn Kelly kicking ass, Josh Lekach’s Sport Drink, great movies like “Land of Bad,” terrible movies like “Union,” Cumala’s insane tax policies, virgins in paradise, two-tier justice, creepy refugees, Marshfield Wisconsin’s obsession with demolition derbies, and the top 15 hottest women in America right now.

Large

Audio Only |

Scroll

Time	Text
	Oh, live from New York.
	It's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McInnes.
	Couple of pints.
	Maradona, he's got work in the morning.
	Maradona had a donna kebab.
	Maradona on the walk of shame, the horror.
	Maradona and he's got a big game, the murder.
	Now he's stingy in the manor, just call.
	But don't give me all, just give me all.
	Diego, Maradona.
	Diego, Maradona.
	We'll be right back.
	Maradona on a fouly night.
	Maradona had a couple of lines.
	Maradona got indecency fines.
	Hey, Maradona wanted headbacky mice.
	Maradona on the fucking Mickey Nines, by the way.
	They're a song called Maradona.
	And they're talking about Diego Armando Martona, Argentina football player, soccer, soccer over here.
	And he was a coach, too.
	They're obviously bug fans because they fucking love football up in Scotland.
	I was hanging out with a Scottish guy at the bar last night, and the bartender's name was Kevin.
	And I kept hearing him yell, Kevin, are you going to?
	And it gave me PTSD because that was my dad.
	I hear Gavin with a Scottish accent.
	I go, what?
	Sorry.
	I didn't mean to spill it.
	Welcome back.
	Today's a free episode.
	Free up.
	We just randomly pick episodes to make free.
	This is today's.
	And we've got way too much stuff.
	I don't know how we're going to get through it all.
	We've got to talk about perves.
	We got to talk about my demolition derby.
	I just witnessed in Marshfield, Wisconsin.
	Life-changing, some movies.
	We got to talk about our super.
	We got.
	Let's start with THC Extract.
	Folks, let's talk real talk.
	Times are tough right now.
	The economy's tanking and inflation is through the roof.
	We could all use a break, and that's where THCExtract.com comes in.
	There is no E in extract.
	Owned and operated by true American patriots.
	THCEXTR.com brings you 100% legal Delta 9 THC gummies that are 100% made in the USA.
	These aren't just gummies.
	They're just a taste of freedom crafted right here.
	They're a taste of freedom.
	They're not just a taste for freedom.
	That's two mistakes so far in this.
	And here's something to brighten your day.
	All products on thcextract.com are now 50% off, 5-0% off with promo code Gavin, thcextract.com.
	Gummies aren't just for getting high, they're for lifting your spirits.
	Each batch is third-party lab tested and engineered to give you the best buzz in America.
	So when they're going gets tough, get baked and relaxed with thcextract.com.
	There is no E in Extract.
	Don't forget promo code Gavin for 50% off everything at thcextract.com.
	Elevate your spirits and unwind with thcextract.com where American quality meets peace of mind.
	Visit thcextract.com today and discover why it's the Patriots Choice, THCET.com, proudly American, just like you.
	Get high like inflation with thcextract.com.
	Promo code Gavin at 50% off all orders.
	There's no E in extract.
	Got it?
	Oh, yeah.
	I riff on other ads, but with this THC stuff, you got to be real careful for legal reasons.
	You may have noticed I'm wearing a horror poncho.
	Whoa.
	I know all of these, but the bottom, my right, these two guys.
	What is this?
	That's well, not Chucky, I'm guessing, but the one in the middle?
	No, that's Chucky, sorry.
	Exorcist chick in the middle, bottom middle.
	What's she holding, though?
	I don't know.
	She's holding her hand.
	There's a dolly in her hand.
	So, was that in the movie?
	Was there some doll?
	I don't remember her having a dolly.
	I mean, because the Hellraiser has his Hell Cube thing.
	And then who's this?
	The Ring Girl.
	What's she holding?
	Or maybe I'm wrong.
	She's holding up like a little tattered doll.
	It's fucking hot, man.
	Don't they wear that because it's hot?
	That's for the basement.
	When you're watching movies and you're a little nippy.
	No offense, Ryan.
	Whoops.
	I'm not little.
	Speaking of little nippies, Ryan 1-4 was doing a workout that involved backflips yesterday.
	I don't remember what that was.
	Which is amazing because it's hard enough to be lifting weights and pumping iron, but to incorporate a backflip was pretty impressive.
	I've never seen you do anything like this.
	I don't recall doing anything.
	And I'm blown away by your skills.
	Is that your backyard?
	Where is that?
	That's actually...
	Oh, I like your little dance there.
	That's a dead.
	Victory dance.
	See, that's a dead giveaway that it's not me.
	I don't dance like that.
	Look how high it is.
	I dance very differently.
	I do pose.
	You may have noticed, too, underneath my poncho, I'm wearing this strangely obtuse polo by Ralph Loren.
	My dog is here today.
	He just got back from when you put them away.
	What do you call that?
	The kennel.
	Kennel?
	He's making strange gestures.
	Are you okay there, bro?
	I texted you what inspired this.
	Remember the guy who cut his hands, the MTA driver?
	Who cut his hands?
	How much is that, by the way?
	They might give us $74.
	Oh, they wanted...
	So what I'm seeing here, so this is a different lineup though, right?
	Do you have...
	But I think the 1973, I think Chucky stays the same.
	The chick in the middle and the chick in the bottom, right, I think we could assume is the same.
	So 2002 has got to be the right.
	Same guys.
	I have Freddy.
	You have Pennywise, too?
	Yeah.
	Nice.
	God, you're stupid.
	How did you forget something you saw eight seconds ago?
	Because you very quickly moved to the bottom, too.
	But then you just take this authoritative stance of, well, different guys on this one.
	Well, it is different because notice that they're holding dates instead of this.
	So I wouldn't assume that maybe.
	No, that's not what we're talking about.
	You decided that two were the same characters.
	And then you spoke about that like it was a fact.
	Yeah.
	Because they look the same.
	Hair, the same hair.
	Yeah, they are the same, you shit for brains.
	They're all the same.
	But you decided to choose two.
	And then say it like a fact.
	They're all the same.
	What's he holding?
	A boat?
	Weird.
	Yeah, that was at the demolition.
	Well, first, I sent you a text of this shirt because I saw this black dude who cut his hands working at the MTA from our own neighborhood here, the Bronx.
	And I noticed that he was wearing this, and I thought, that's a look I want.
	So I went online and I bought this and a couple others.
	They're hard to find.
	I think Ralph Lauren stopped making them when they became ghetto.
	But that's when I want them.
	So this is my peer group now.
	You can hit play at any time.
	It's stupid.
	At the end of the day, I did it for someone I loved, my fiancé.
	And, you know, if I had to do it again...
	And, you know, to be there for her, I would.
	He did it for love.
	He cut his hands for love because he wanted to spend more time with his fiancé.
	He also goes on to say he got a BA in prison.
	He's a career criminal.
	Yeah, great look, guy.
	Great look.
	Speaking of great looks, I came into work today and I noticed there was a car parked so fucking badly, it was in my spot.
	That pissed me off, obviously.
	Secondly, it was parked way out into the parking lot with this much room behind it.
	So it's actually hard to get into the parking lot because of him.
	And he was all over on one side.
	I was in my wife's Cadillac Escalade, so it's a fucking tank.
	I had to do a bunch of stuff today that involved a big car.
	And it took me like 15 minutes to squeeze into the tiny spot that he left for me.
	Now, Ryan came in much later, of course.
	What time did you get in today?
	11-something.
	Roughly, what do you think?
	11.20.
	And why were you so late?
	I don't know if it's late.
	I mean, eight hours from 11 to 7.30 when I leave or 7 o'clock.
	It's an eight-hour shift.
	11.30, 12.30.
	Okay.
	So you bumped into this gentleman.
	I did.
	And you started explaining it to me, and I said, stop.
	Stop.
	You're wasting gold.
	We're wasting gold.
	We want this to be on the show.
	That's true.
	So what did this clown lay down?
	He was not a fan of yours.
	Wait, that sounds general.
	What do you mean?
	Like, not just the note, but me, my life, my background.
	Oh yeah, and well he's not a fan of, Not a fan of you as a dude.
	Not a fan of your little signs.
	My sign said, hey, asshole.
	Oh, it did?
	Yeah.
	We called the tow truck.
	Hopefully you get out of here before he gets here.
	Wow.
	Signed the name of our company, censored, like it says on the signs.
	And then I said, P.S., you suck at parking.
	Wow.
	Okay.
	So that's why he felt the way he did.
	So at first, he had this nervous adrenaline face, and he was passive-aggressive, but he was like, he kind of looked like, you know how the Hasids have inbred Jewishness to a degree?
	Like they'll have some weird features.
	So he had like a weird lip thing with like this sort of thing, and he was a circle.
	But he doesn't strike me as Jewish.
	He's the property manager, right?
	Yeah.
	That strikes me.
	Superintendent.
	Yeah.
	That struck me a little.
	I don't know what else.
	Supers are blue collar.
	They don't make that much money.
	But he said property manager, and he had like an orange.
	Oh, so did he look nice?
	No.
	Okay, so he's the super.
	He was fat.
	You know what he had on?
	He had an orange reflector vest on.
	So at first it kind of seemed like Maybe it seemed like he was kind of aggressive, but I couldn't tell.
	And I was like, hey, is that your car?
	Wait a minute, wait a minute.
	Now, we're off to the wrong foot here with this.
	He's not Jewish.
	So you see someone in an orange vest and you go, oh, you're probably one of these Jew property owners.
	When you hear property manager, I think Jew.
	Even if he has an orange vest on.
	And then also the inbred sort of features, which they want to have.
	It's just a thing that I've noticed.
	They have a dysgenic melange.
	That doesn't make any sense.
	And that's, I mean, acidic Jews have a problem with inbreeding.
	You're not going to come across any here.
	Interesting.
	Yeah.
	No, it's not interesting.
	Everyone knows that.
	They're in Williamsburg, Brooklyn.
	And you've got to go to Curious Joel.
	I love Big A, but Big A's a Jewish fella.
	He has some of the similar things.
	Sandy Kane, she has a bunch of different weird blemishes all over the place.
	They just have issues, physical issues.
	You're in a town.
	You're talking about Kumia's old whack pack, and you're in a town that's wildly disproportionately Jewish.
	Anyway, we're off in a tangent.
	So what did he say?
	This is getting.
	So I pulled up to him and I says, you know, you're in my spot.
	Is that your car?
	He said, yeah, it is my spot.
	I'm the proper manager.
	It's not.
	He said, well, no, he says, it is my car.
	I'm the property manager.
	Yeah?
	And like you said, he was probably expecting me to be like, well, I'm so sorry.
	But I wasn't.
	I was just calm.
	And I said, he said, did you leave this note?
	And he's kind of like smiling like this.
	He's like, did you leave this note?
	You know how when a black guy doesn't want to laugh?
	No, he's going to beat you up?
	Like when your face does weird stuff when your adrenaline's coursing through your veins.
	He's like this.
	He's like, did you write 10 note?
	Like, it's weird.
	It looked weird.
	And he had that thing on his face.
	It's a natural instinct, I think, that people do to avoid conflict.
	And I've noticed myself, like, on the train, when there's a crazy person calling me a cracker or something, I'll just go, and they'll laugh.
	I'm not amused, but it's involuntary.
	And I think it's a way humans de-escalate.
	His face was trying to de-escalate, but his mouth was trying to escalate.
	It's the New York way of starting a fight, is to pretend you.
	It's kind of in the genre of a fight face.
	Sucker punched me for no reason.
	Yeah, so it was that face.
	And he said, Did you leave this note?
	And I said, No, that was my boss.
	He's like, All right, well, and I was like, He's kind of an asshole.
	I didn't even know you wrote the word asshole on the thing.
	Well, thanks for having me back.
	It was funny because I thought he was laughing.
	So I was like, this is like a jocular thing.
	He's kind of an asshole.
	Sorry about the note.
	No, we're both, I thought we were both angered that people keep taking our spots.
	Well, I wasn't necessarily angry because he was going to move it, but I thought that he should have known better because he's the property manager that you should not take somebody's spot that's assigned to them.
	But anyway, and then it became clear to me after that.
	He was like, oh, I'll move my car.
	I'll move my car.
	You know, no problem because I'm not making a fuss.
	But what I did notice, and this is when I realized he's serious, like, this isn't fun.
	We're not going to be having a, haha, sorry about that type of time.
	He got one of Gavin's notes.
	He points to the wall and he says, you know that hole in the wall?
	It's roughly the size of your boss's motorcycles muffler.
	So maybe that's the problem.
	No, it's not.
	I know, it's square.
	It's a square hole.
	Tell me the physics of how a motorcycle muffler.
	He doesn't know motorcycles at all.
	Like, obviously the back tire is going to hit first.
	Oh, yeah.
	Wait.
	Oh, yeah.
	Oh, yeah.
	But it's also a square hole, so I'm pretty sure you could write that off immediately.
	You don't have a square muffler.
	Yeah.
	What a fucking one.
	So that's his.
	So that's a threat.
	And he says, no, don't worry, I'll move it.
	I'll move it.
	And I don't know why he's getting angry at me now.
	I was trying to be funny with him.
	And then now maybe he sees, he smells blood.
	He's like, this guy is nice, so I'm gonna, I'll move young.
	I'll move it.
	I'll move it.
	I forget what else he said, but yeah.
	Wait, you have that whole intro with no ending?
	He's like, I'm not going to cause a fuss, but I'll move it.
	Really, it's the ending is accusing you.
	No, the ending is selling.
	Don't move it, but...
	I don't know if you have low blood sugar or something.
	It sounds like he has.
	There's something wrong with your head.
	Well, I'm telling a story to somebody who does not want to listen, is not cooperative in a conversation.
	You feel like, oh, they're getting bored.
	Everybody's getting bored.
	Let's change topic.
	All right.
	Wait, what about this detail?
	And then now.
	You can't say, you introduced this thing like three times.
	I'll move it.
	But I forgot what the butt was.
	Murderers in an interrogation room have an easier conversation than with Gavin McInnes on his show.
	This isn't a place for chatting.
	The thing that drives me nuts about him is he, he, because we've had words before.
	The same guy.
	The same guy.
	And he goes, I'm the super.
	Like, I'm going to go, oh, I didn't know you were the son of God.
	And you can park wherever you want.
	I don't give a fuck if you're the super.
	The super gets to park in anyone's parking spot.
	Is it a magic rule?
	We pay for that spot.
	So if you want to come and go do your super shit, go park in the shittiest spot we have.
	Like, do you sit at my desk too?
	Where does it end?
	Can you walk in here and smoke a cigarette?
	Fuck you.
	I didn't even know what he was doing.
	I'm the super.
	Oh, you're, you know that super doesn't mean Superman, right?
	I'm the super intendant, and I'm intending on working in the supermarket.
	Speaking of Superman, I haven't seen this movie yet, but 1-5 looks really good.
	And when I was watching this trailer, I was, I remembered seeing this Superman movies as a kid and thinking, there's something magical about his face.
	It really, there's something very unique and otherworldly about Christopher Reeves' face, isn't it?
	What ethnicity is that?
	Austrian?
	That was a part.
	I played the part.
	I'm not that man.
	Hands down, he was Superman from day one.
	I realized that if I could pull off this part, it would change my life.
	I like his little dimples.
	I don't like that.
	Oh, he came from French aristocracy.
	In a city, my first men of that young man.
	Maybe he is a superman.
	Maybe he's better than us.
	He's the Uber Mensch.
	Doing things to my dad.
	It was all about activity and action.
	Riding bikes, playing soccer, skiing.
	My dad was very competitive and didn't really slow down.
	Imagine your dad yells Carpe Diem at you while you're kicking soccer ball.
	That was the last time I saw him on his feet.
	That's rough.
	Mr. Greav currently has no movement or spontaneous respiration.
	Superman?
	Crazy.
	Just that simple little thing over the horse.
	I'd ruined my life and everybody else's.
	I won't be able to skip.
	That's like Charles Krauthammer.
	He dove into this swimming hole in Montreal and he was in medical school and he was studying the sensitivity of the spine.
	And when he heard the, he goes, I knew I was paralyzed from that moment on.
	Like that second on.
	Anyway, that looks like a real tearjerker.
	It made me feel bad for all the Christopher Reeves jokes I've said over the years.
	How shitty am I?
	Yeah, bad person I am.
	Eminem has a lot of apologies.
	I think on every album he references Christopher Reeves.
	Really?
	Yeah.
	Or as they say, as they say in country music songs, Eminem.
	I didn't know that.
	I was listening to some song.
	It was like, she knows all the words to every Eminem song.
	So that was a running joke of my wife all weekend was like, what the fuck is Eminem?
	I saw another couple movies since I last saw you.
	I saw a movie called Union that is the most gigantic piece of shit I've ever seen.
	Ready for the premise?
	There's a secret agency just like, what's it called?
	The British one.
	The gentleman, not the gentleman, the kingfish.
	The kingsman.
	The kingsman.
	It's exactly like the kingsman, and they do take in a working class guy, but here's the clincher.
	They always do.
	You see, working class men aren't scared of heights.
	They know how to fight.
	They're independent thinkers.
	I mean, I agree with all this, obviously.
	Therefore, they'd be perfect for an agency that's above the CIA and the FBI, made of construction workers and regular Joes who are always like, whoa, whoa.
	But then in the end, you realize that their lack of sophistication is what saves them.
	For example, and they're all over Europe because they're taking advantage of these tax breaks.
	You know, if you shoot in Belgium and you spend $7 million, they spend $7 million.
	So now you got a $14 million movie.
	So they're all over fucking Europe.
	It's such a rip-off.
	There's all these ads for Range Rover in it, too.
	Like, you're in a luxury SUV.
	Oh, wow.
	You push a button.
	But in one scene, they're in Belgium and they're on a roof and the bad guys are going, what the fuck?
	Whoa.
	Mark Wahlberg works on high-rises.
	He's a steel guy.
	So he's along those I-beams on skyscrapers on a daily basis.
	And he ain't scared.
	And then he knocks them out and they're, wow, they fall.
	And he's just walking like it ain't no thing.
	And here's the worst part.
	There's at least two instances where Halle Berry drives, including a motorcycle.
	Just remember in James Bond where that black chick is on the scooter and he gets on the back?
	This happens in this movie.
	And I was going to turn it off right when I saw him get on the back of that motorcycle because men don't even do that when men are driving.
	Like there's the ad for the Range Rover.
	Turn it up.
	He's on the wrong side of the road because he's a simple guy from Jersey.
	This first time out of the tri-state area.
	Her hair is infuriating the entire movie.
	What's with that wisp?
	What's with the annoying S-Superman wisp?
	Maybe her Botox went down into her mouth.
	Let me hear it.
	The tri-state area.
	I can hear a list.
	No wisp in her hair.
	Yeah, yeah.
	The S-shaped wisp.
	No, it's the whole fucking movie.
	Some scenes, she's shooting at people.
	It's covering her entire face.
	It's more annoying than your hair, dude.
	I'm still totally distracted why you put fish in everything when you can't remember the name.
	Kingfish?
	You thought the name of the movie was Kingfish?
	Yeah, well, there is the Fisher King.
	There is no Fisher King.
	Yeah, there is.
	And you make Fish Kiss instead of Sherfish.
	Wait, you're wasting your time making shitty Photoshop drawings?
	This took two seconds.
	The Fisher King with Robin Williams.
	I also have variants.
	But, and then I saw this other movie called Land of Bad.
	It's done by this loser, rich kid.
	His dad was like a Christie's auction house guy.
	Dude, it's fucking amazing.
	And it's got Russell Crowe in it.
	It's on Netflix right now.
	I assumed it would stink.
	This guy's last movie lost $10 million and he's in Mars and every fucking space movie.
	He's always biting off more than he can chew.
	This is a rescue mission in like fucking Southeast Asia.
	I was glued to my seat.
	It's from the perspective of Russell Crowe, who's a drone operator known as Reaper.
	So we go back from him sitting at his desk to these guys.
	Action scenes were spellbinding.
	It's one of the best war movies I've ever seen.
	I was texting vets.
	Saying you gotta fucking see this.
	Holy shit, is it good.
	Going after a CIA asset that's been captured.
	Was your first mission in theater, J.K.?
	CIA asset that's been captured.
	In other important news, I'm on the new edition of Purple Works Nutrition right now.
	Pull that up, Jamie.
	I forget what it's called, but it's purple, and it's a much bigger thing.
	Everyone says it tastes way better.
	I agree.
	Although sometimes I mix it with Gatorade, which makes everything weird.
	Yeah, it's that guy, Invictus.
	Invictus.
	So I'm currently sailing on that.
	I finished all these.
	The normal pre-workout.
	This is a new batch.
	It's fucking awesome.
	It's like a time bomb.
	The ants start crawling in your skin.
	And I was monitoring it closely when I did my workout.
	I wasn't boxing today.
	I was doing weights.
	And at the beginning, I didn't want to be there.
	And it's the bike for a minute.
	And then it's some other stuff, jumping jacks.
	And I was looking at the clock.
	It started at 9.30 and it was like 9.32.
	And I was already wondering.
	And then the Invictus kicks in.
	And the ants start crawling around the body, making you do stuff.
	40-pound chest presses and some long pole that you're doing backwards squats with.
	And these things.
	And these things.
	Pull-ups.
	What was the worst part?
	The 40-pound chest presses with barbells was pretty fucking difficult.
	There was a few like, come on, come on.
	You got the dumbbell fishes, you got the fish flies, the fish-ups, and you got like the fish pumps.
	Yeah, it was the fish-ups.
	Fish press.
	Fish.
	Fish press.
	And I timed it.
	20 minutes in, the ants have expended their expenditures.
	And now you're just...
	And then the ants were like petering out 20 minutes in.
	So, you know, for a 30-minute workout, one scoop, well, two-thirds of a scoop as far as I know, as far as I do, is absolutely fantastic.
	Gets you out there, overcomes your laziness.
	I highly recommend it.
	Purpleworksnutrition.com, promo code Gavin, gives you 15% off.
	What's this about?
	Josh LaCash has a $50 sport drink?
	Yeah, it's called Sport Drink.
	It's $60?
	Yeah, but I don't know how many servings it is.
	Oh, that's a powder like Purpleworks.
	So we're giving him an ad right now with free advertising.
	Is that what we're doing?
	I saw he was on...
	They did an article talking about John Cena and how he follows all these people that a lot of them are fascists.
	And he follows like 2 Million people.
	He obviously has a bot like Obama used to do, where every time you follow him, he follows you.
	And so, yeah, John Cena doesn't literally follow those million people or whatever the number is.
	So they go, he follows a bunch of fascists, including a guy named John Josh LaCash, who's hawking a sport drink.
	Wait, that feels like advertisement.
	I hope he dies.
	Josh has some connections.
	Oh, you think?
	That sounds to me like a...
	We'll call him.
	He has some connections.
	Can he get me back on Twitter?
	Yeah, right?
	No, no, this was on a Rolling Stone article.
	You might know some niggas in Rolling Stone.
	Oh, my God.
	Again, with you.
	His parents.
	I can't even say it on air, but yeah, no, he's embedded in Hollywood in the upper echelon.
	He used to go to all sorts of parts.
	I mean, I think this is openly known.
	He's friends with Katy Perry.
	And then there's a lot of private things that I can't say that I know about him.
	All right.
	Also an important news, Oasis are getting back together.
	I have a theory about Oasis getting back together.
	I remember reading Thurston Moore from Sonic Youth saying, you know, if we had just quit at the peak of Lullapalooza and then waited 15 years and had a reunion, we'd all be multi-millionaires.
	Instead, we just kept going and it kind of petered out.
	And I thought that was a very interesting economical concept.
	Economic concept.
	And then I thought, maybe the brothers Gallagher have been lying all this time about their feud.
	And they actually get along great.
	Because they were brilliant at marketing back in the 90s.
	Remember they were fighting, what was the other band they were against?
	Blur.
	Blur.
	And they would get their fans to buy Oasis CDs and just throw them out.
	Just to get Oasis' numbers up.
	And people would do that.
	And they'd make fun of Blur on stage and stuff.
	remember pop life or something and they have a thing with robbie Boy band, one-man boy band guy.
	Robbie Williams.
	Yeah.
	So here's my theory.
	They kept, it was just like Bitcoin or something.
	And they kept saying no to reunions.
	And they're like, hold it, hold, hold, hold, hold now.
	Hmm.
	So maybe this offer, I remember Led Zeppelin were getting offered like $70 million or something for a reunion.
	Robert Plant said no, because he would have ruined the band for all of us.
	He can't sing anymore.
	You know what's funny?
	What?
	They kept making fun of Robbie Williams for being fat.
	So then he makes a video.
	When he gets skinny, he's like, look, I'm not fat anymore.
	It's like, I never realized that put that too into it.
	But that's the main thing that they were doing.
	They made him take steroids.
	That's so funny.
	You're a little fat, aren't you?
	He really wasn't.
	He was just kind of tubby.
	Yeah, it's just a fun joke to make when someone is slightly like big in the chin, in the cheeks.
	Speaking of big in the cheeks, this is the front page of the post.
	Not that interesting.
	Hoarder home whore.
	Man kills three siblings because they wanted to sell Long Island House where he spent his entire life.
	Oh.
	Faggot.
	Did I mention Megan Kelly yet?
	No.
	It just came out that she is getting more viewers than CNN, MSNBC, and one other shitty network combined.
	Massive.
	And then you have Rogan and Tucker.
	Our guys are winning.
	We're definitely on the top.
	I had a lot of stuff I got to talk about that is timely.
	I can't push any of this away.
	Like this one.
	Go to 1.6?
	No.
	1.7?
	This tax hike thing.
	I think it's 1.7.
	Yeah.
	Kamala Harris, maybe we should play...
	This is too short.
	Oh, we have a Hawk to a Harris one, don't we?
	We do.
	All right, let's play that.
	No one's a little long, but we can do it.
	We can do whatever.
	Wait, stop the show.
	This is a free call from Mercedes-Benz Herrera.
	An incarcerated individual at San Bernardino County Sheriff's Department.
	This call is not private.
	It will be recorded and may be monitored.
	If you believe this should be a private call, please hang up and follow facility instructions to register this number as a private number.
	Oh.
	Hello?
	Hello?
	Hey.
	Hey.
	I never pushed a button.
	That's cool.
	Yeah, it's a new feature, I guess.
	I guess you just have to, like, I don't know.
	Anyway, thank you so much for writing the forward.
	It's amazing.
	It's so great.
	I had to be greeted to me.
	It's so good.
	Perfect.
	Okay, good.
	Yeah.
	There was a couple things about it that could have been better, I thought, in retrospect, but nah.
	Now, you're on the air right now.
	Oh, okay.
	This is Mercedes Carrera.
	She just wrote, she's a porn star, an ex-porn star, who just wrote a book about how evil porn is.
	Yes, I did.
	It's called 10 Reasons and More to Say No to Porn.
	And Gavin here was kind enough to write the forward for me because for years we would argue about the veracity of the idea that pornography is acceptable in modern civilization.
	And after being in jail for five and a half years and living in the rot of modern civilization, I now realize Gavin is right.
	So Gavin's right about most things, but he's also right about porn.
	And so this book is based, I realized after, so I read the Bible the whole way through, and I realized that pornography breaks every single commandment.
	Now, you can take a lot of things out of the Bible.
	It's a very robust book, but the Ten Commandments are the foundation of every single civil and criminal legal system in the West prior to it becoming pagan.
	Now we live in a pagan society, and this is why everything's all fucked up.
	But when we lived under, when America was great and we lived under Christian values, you realize that certain things are not acceptable.
	And one of those things is online authenticity.
	It ruined, it rocked people's brains.
	So I put a lot of anecdotes in there, not only from my time in the industry, but also even having met people in here who I see the detrimental effect of pornography on their lives, on their relationships.
	And so this is important.
	It's important for you guys to understand.
	It's not just something that you can do, you know, and just pretend that you're not doing it.
	Like this is going to affect your brain, your relationship, and ultimately all of civilization.
	Yep.
	Couldn't agree more.
	Okay, we got to get back to the show.
	Love you.
	We'll keep an eye out for the book.
	We'll promote it here.
	Love you too.
	Thank you.
	God bless all of you.
	Bye.
	Bye.
	It's crazy.
	So when's that coming out?
	I don't know.
	Soon.
	She was nagging me about the intro.
	In the intro, I put a PS and said she's been accused of the most heinous crimes imaginable.
	And if she is guilty, I want her to die.
	But you're innocent till proven guilty.
	And I'm backing her like I would back my sister until this all goes through the courts.
	Not that the courts have been very reliable with these J6ers, but if anyone produces any evidence that she molested her daughter, then she's dead to me, obviously, Doy.
	But yeah, let's play the Hoctua Harris.
	It's time for...
	Put me to the hands...
	Wait, did I not include this in the newts?
	Dude.
	What's happened?
	I sent you an email about this talk that Milo and I are doing.
	It's a come alla roast at the University of South Carolina.
	There's been a lot of backlash against it.
	Everyone who's been against it have been African Americans.
	And 100% of the backlash has been retarded.
	Starting out with this guy, he got sued by the Catholic kid, the high school kid.
	What's his name now?
	Nicholas Salmon.
	Nicholas Salmon.
	He was salmon.
	It's a fish episode.
	Oh my gosh.
	You're fish on the brain.
	So Nicholas Salmon, the guy who had that smirk on with the Indian in his face, this guy, Bakari Sellers, he was a congressman, I guess, and he said that Nick needs a punch in the face.
	So he got sued for that and had to pay some money back.
	But he put out a tweet when this talk was announced that said, oh, hell no, we ain't doing this in his inimitable, ebonical way.
	And then Milo, I can't roast him, of course.
	But it's amazing the pearl clutching going on at these colleges with these fucking losers pretending they're offended.
	Pull up the other shit in that email, Ryan, and I'll send you, because there's like a thing an hour about this.
	South Carolina is pooping its panties, and the organizer sends us every single one of them.
	But girls are making videos about how it's unacceptable.
	They demand an explanation from the school, and the school is like, it's a student group.
	Is it this one?
	It's not up to us.
	Yeah, she's big up there.
	She, oh my God, there's like these two-hour conversations with black women of power.
	Oh, it's our buddy Roland S. Martin saying it's despicable and racist.
	Oh, I haven't seen that one.
	Play that.
	He was happy to take my money to come on my network.
	He did my money.
	Organization is bringing them in for this uncensored America.
	They're hosting a comedy roast where two of the speakers are white supremacists.
	The subject of this roast is, of course, Democratic nominee Vice President Kama Harris.
	list gavin mcinnis the founder of the white supremacist group the proud boys is one of the speakers and also Lists this other fool, Milo.
	I can't pull up Roland Martin on the show.
	Oh, yeah.
	Now, but he's also a violent racist.
	Wait, wait, he can't say Milo's last name?
	Let's see.
	The Proud Boys is one of the speakers.
	It also lists this other fool, Milo.
	I never can pronounce his last name.
	Listes.
	It lists.
	Not list once.
	It lists.
	Some other black chick was like.
	And one of the guys, Gavin McGinnis, he started a white nationalist band called the Proud Boys.
	And my thing is.
	If this is something that you find so threatening, how come you've never heard of it before?
	Like, we've all heard of the KKK.
	They're bad guys.
	We're familiar with them.
	But if you're making a video about how offended you are, should you know the name of the thing that keeps you up at night?
	Oh, it was Joe Biggs, who's in jail for January 6th.
	And here he is, Roland Martin, in a weird African little outfit he got that still had the creases in it.
	Like he put it on at the hotel that morning.
	The first conglomerate was ITT.
	They literally called the CIA and said, hey, we'll pay for you guys.
	Is that a Wakandan Fred Perry?
	Okay?
	We have to understand what's so terrible on that.
	I always confuse him with the other guy when they were talking about NWA and they say, motherfucker got it bad because I'm brown.
	Michael Eric Dyson.
	Yeah, and I go, they also said, I never should have been let out the penitentiary.
	And then his rebuke to that was, yeah, but that's a different song.
	Oh.
	All right.
	Anyway, go to...
	Motherfuckers want to act like...
	He's also a violent racist and just absolutely nuts.
	According McLean is a 2023 graduate of University of South Carolina.
	How naive is it to think that you could be a prominent racist?
	Like being an outspoken racist, by definitions means you're not prominent.
	They take away your prominence.
	Wait, I think this is the girl that did the video that said I started a band.
	Yes.
	So, of course, plenty of students, alumni, donors, and community members are very outraged what is going on.
	Students are hoping that they are taking action on campus, but some of them are feeling afraid to do so due to previous actions taken by the university last summer when students decided to speak out.
	So, as of right now, we are trying to make sure that students feel comfortable on campus as well as making sure to maintain the pressure on President Emeritus and the Board of Trustees to get this.
	This is another trick, Emeritus.
	These people always do.
	They talk about how the students don't feel safe.
	When Alex Stein and I did our thing at Penn State, there was 500 people calling for our deaths, trying to kill us.
	They spat in Alex's face.
	The cops had to go through traffic lights.
	Who was in danger?
	A couple of Prowboys did show up, and they got punched in the face, and they didn't fight back.
	They just took the punches.
	Or when Tommy Robinson and Alex Jones and I were going to do that speaking tour in Australia, they said they feared violence.
	The only violence that was going to happen would be against me and Tommy and Alex.
	These students don't feel safe if Milo and I go and roast Kamala.
	Let her go a little bit more, then we'll move on.
	Reminds me of when the racist, I forgot that fool name, he came to Texas A ⁇ M University and we applied to him.
	And this is what these fools do.
	And then what they do is they want to blow this thing up, make it huge, and get people outraged.
	Then it gets canceled to say, oh, see, there's no free speech in America.
	Yeah.
	this is cancel culture.
	That's not what I'm going for, but that's what I'll say if it gets canceled.
	And I will be right.
	Your aim.
	Yes.
	Yes.
	That's exactly what they're doing.
	Currently online, both the student organization and the speakers are harassing people using slurs, sexism, racism.
	And they even attacked one of our notable alumni, Bakari Sellers, with a homophobic slur.
	I have gotten some things directed to me from Milo and the student organization as well.
	So what they're brilliant to do is really troll people, get them to engage with them, really use rage bait, I would say, and really just trying to make this so much more chaotic and really hiding behind the use of free speech in order to spread hate on this campus.
	Well, and look, that's their goal.
	They also say we want to get canceled so we can just keep the money.
	Yeah, that's why I bother doing these fucking things.
	Go to 1.7, though, to get serious for a second here.
	I see capital gains, I'm going to try not to bore you here, as a good metric for a successful economy.
	The lower, the better.
	I think we're hovering around 20% now federally.
	Obviously, it's contingent on when you decide to cash out your shares.
	And I guess the simple way to explain capital gains is how much tax you have to pay when you finally sell your company, sell your shares, sell your interest.
	And 20% is a lot, but if you wait, I think you can get down to 15.
	I'm no economist, but this looks like the freakiest thing I've ever seen.
	Kamala Harris backs President Biden's 44.6% capital gains tax proposal.
	What?
	That's double.
	More than double.
	It's like this thing I read this weekend about some Chicago landlord.
	He's had his taxes raised from 20 grand to 140 grand.
	And he was trying to explain to the IRS that he'd have to raise each tenant's apartment rent five grand in order to pay that.
	In other words, they're just taking his building.
	Like, I'm going to be bankrupt.
	I can't afford that.
	I won't have any tenants.
	It's Cuban.
	They're taking the land.
	This is socialism in action.
	And it's amazing because she's in the administration telling us what she'll do when she gets into the administration.
	And she's not just any VP, too.
	She was touted as a VP who is really a co-star.
	Biden always said she's not really the president.
	He called her the president many times, but he basically said, she's my partner in crime, literally.
	And then finally, I thought this was fucking hilarious.
	I mean, it's possible they were doing it on purpose, but Oprah talks about big, fat, loser, childless cat ladies, and then they pan to one, which is a Key and Peel sketch.
	Uh-oh.
	Have you watched Anthony Kume show?
	Childless cat lady.
	It is exactly that sketch.
	It's the exact sketch.
	And she looks behind, like, who's the childless cat lady?
	I got four kids and I'm married.
	Why are you jump to that sketch?
	Government should work for everyone, not just the elite.
	And that's why I helped pass the farm bill, because I care about farmers.
	But I won't stop there.
	I will work for everyone.
	Whether you are young, whether you are old, whether you are Asian or Hispanic, whether you are straight or whether you are gay.
	I will work for all of you.
	And that's why I also support marriage.
	Remember he moves in that sketch and he ends up just going who believe that makers' contributions are no less important are no less important than any other group in this fine nation of ours.
	So turn to that gay person.
	Okay.
	I got to tell you about this Demolition Derby.
	It was a fucking paradise.
	It was in Marshfield, Wisconsin, About, I think it's just south of Chicago, I guess.
	I don't really know.
	Madison, Chicago kind of zone.
	Wisconsin goes up forever, basically.
	And it keeps getting more Trump.
	It's funny because Madison is all Kamala and Biden and Trump sucks and faux news and all that shit.
	I learned my brother lives or brother-in-law.
	And I go, do you still go to that bar?
	What's it called, Jens?
	And he goes, eh.
	I'm not really welcome there.
	I go, why?
	He goes, because I'm your brother-in-law.
	Now, you've met him before, right?
	He doesn't look remotely white.
	He's clearly an American Indian.
	And white people are eschewing him and discouraging him from going to their venues because his sister married Hitler.
	Like, that's a bit of a stretch, guys.
	Anyway.
	Go up to this Demolition Derby.
	They don't sell shirts.
	We're going to make shirts for this fucking thing.
	The fair had the weirdest merch ever.
	Every single table, merch table had these stupid ponchos and then a bunch of garbage bucket hats that say Pokemon on them or some Disney shit.
	That's it.
	And there was like 10 booths.
	They all had the exact same merch.
	Whoever accepted that bidder needs to apologize.
	But it's Sunday's entertainment obsession with destruction, does it say?
	Yeah.
	Demolition Derby.
	Are you ready for a smashing good time?
	I was just, I lean over my wife and I go, this is a symphony of stupidity.
	And she goes, something the European mind could never comprehend.
	That's so true.
	At the beginning of the thing, the guy goes, all the EMTs, fire department, police, veterans, please stand up.
	And so a lot of people stood up, maybe a third.
	I stood up because I was committing stolen valor.
	Just kidding.
	And they go, we want to thank you for allowing us to do stupid, they didn't say shit, stupid stuff like this.
	And I thought, this is my religion.
	This is what I believe in.
	I get abortion and the economy and capital gains are important.
	And no disrespect to the proud boys who are doing time for January 6th.
	That's fucking insane.
	You didn't waste your time.
	You're true heroes.
	You're political prisoners.
	But when I go to jail, it's going to be defending fart jokes and Beavis and Butthead.
	That's the hill I'm willing to die on.
	Like if they, I'm not going to be the person who says they came for my demolition derbies and I said nothing.
	I'm going to be saying something right away.
	Dude, I'm getting involved.
	Like maybe someone out there knows of stuff in the New York area.
	I want to sponsor a car.
	I want to eventually enter in this thing.
	It was fascinating.
	I sent you a bunch of movies.
	There's techniques.
	I had front row.
	I got there two hours early and just roasted my ass in the hot sun.
	What you do is you rear-end guys because you've got your radiator, your transmission, all this important stuff in the front.
	So you want to smash someone in the front of their car with the back of your car.
	You also, your goal, and this is just luck, is that the frame crumples up away from the tires.
	When it crumples into the tires, you're toe, see, there's a reverser.
	He breaks a stick off to say, I'm done, stop hitting me.
	I can't start my car anymore.
	One of the most white things I've ever seen, mighty white of you, this guy smashes the driver's door, and that's frowned upon.
	So the guy gives him the finger.
	And it was an accident.
	No one really does that on purpose.
	That's poor sportsmanship.
	They got to get the cars out after.
	And at the end, at the finish, my favorite line, by the way, from the whole thing was, Steve, hold it.
	Because they have sirens and red flags when something goes wrong, like a car's about to explode or something.
	And this one guy didn't hear, and he kept ramming someone else, and his name was Steve, and they all know each other.
	So the announcer was like, okay, that's a stop.
	Guys, guys, Steve, hold it.
	I must have said, Steve, hold it a hundred times.
	We should make t-shirts.
	Say Steve, hold it.
	I don't know why it was so great.
	And Creed.
	That's so amazing.
	They're playing Beastie Boys, fight for your right to party.
	Fucking getting tipsy, of course, was a biggie.
	Man, how much were those front row seats?
	Like 20 bucks?
	It's about getting there early.
	There's no assigned seats.
	There's probably about 500 people there.
	So anyway, the guy gets out of his car.
	Those three just got stuck like antlers.
	And we just had to declare one, two, three victories.
	But he gets out of his car and he runs over to the guy that hit him in the driver's door.
	What happens next?
	Puts his hand out.
	No hard feelings.
	I don't want any trouble.
	We got Randy Reeder in the 14th also in the first derby.
	Jeremy Howell in the 812 from Hilltop Austin.
	The 8-1-2.
	Chase Katzenberger in the 5-0.
	We got Boyd Kelly in the 90 and Montgomery Lunts in the 16th.
	We have 10 cars for your compact mid-sized.
	Nice.
	See, this is why I don't get how you despise wrestling.
	Because this is what this is about.
	Wrong.
	Wrestling is fake.
	You think this is fake?
	Well, it's real damage they take to their bodies.
	I mean, it's showmanship.
	It's like if this was rigged, who would care?
	You're there for the smashing.
	The entire beauty of it, Captain Wong, is that you can see the damage.
	You watch it in real time.
	You watch these cars get more and more crumpled up.
	I saw mankind bleeding from his face after he jumped off to the hell in a cell.
	Okay, I don't.
	Maybe someone at home can help here.
	They're with me.
	This was really closed quarters, too.
	There were 17 cars in that particular one.
	At one point, the guy, I think H ⁇ H, he got stuck.
	He was raring to go, but he was surrounded by cars.
	So it took him like a few minutes to elbow people out of the way.
	You're getting tipsy.
	Okay, we're at kind of an impasse here.
	I had something I wanted to cover.
	Is there any of these that you want to show before you Got this one.
	Yeah, you get the idea.
	Just keep it going.
	The Hulk.
	I had all my money on him.
	That's another fun thing to do is to bet.
	Team B, that's Ryan Bens.
	We've got the 34 and the 922.
	Oh, there's some action there.
	Block.
	Oh, come on now.
	You're making another big block.
	So if you break your stick, that means you're done.
	Yeah, leave me alone.
	Okay.
	But sometimes you can't see.
	Right.
	What do we got here?
	Two o'clock?
	No, it's been not two hours.
	It's been one hour.
	Okay, let's do it.
	Fuck it.
	We're going to add an hour to the show.
	Checking in on the refugees, we have an Islamist discussing virgins in the afterlife.
	And it sounds not so great.
	One of the things he promises is no excrement.
	Is that really a big deal?
	them.
	No, but I've never...
	It's not a high priority.
	It's maybe happened to me once in my life, I think.
	in 54 years?
	Where Allah created for them believers chaste, restraining their glances, untouched by man or those demon things.
	Brother, do you love her?
	You will be given two wives as you enter paradise.
	Sounds loud.
	I don't want that.
	No menstruation.
	Okay, wait, stop.
	No menstruation.
	All right.
	You don't really come across it.
	Occasionally, you'll see the box in the bathroom toilet.
	No childbirth?
	What?
	Is that gross?
	No saliva, no mucus.
	No saliva?
	How's she going to huck to her?
	ولا نفاس لا بصاق ولا مخاط لا بول ولا غائط No urine.
	No urine.
	I was dating this girl and then she went to the bathroom and peed.
	Bye-bye.
	It's called a yellow flag.
	done She would fill the earth with light and a wonderful scent.
	So perfume?
	Perfume and a light switch.
	We have the sun and perfume.
	You will be given in paradise the sexual strength of a few men.
	Okay.
	I wouldn't mind lasting longer.
	Is that included?
	Every man will be given the strength of 100 men.
	You stop reading it there.
	The virgins of paradise will be jealous for you and they will sing for you.
	No, thanks.
	So much drama.
	The Prophet Muhammad said that the virgins shall sing.
	He said you get two wives when you walk in.
	Now it sounds like there's a bunch.
	Have I got my two bottom bitches and then a bunch of sluts?
	Well, those are just the jealous ones.
	Okay.
	I've seen real housewives.
	Jealous women are not pleasant to be around.
	They'll sing in paradise.
	I'm good.
	That beard with no mustache look is annoying.
	It will not be like the singing of Um Kalthum or Abdel Halim Hafez.
	Oh, thank you for goodness.
	Thank God.
	I'm all um kafumdel.
	You sound like Abdel.
	I was told this would not sound like Abdel.
	There's an Abdelian sort of melodic sound.
	Some guy with just a beard made a lot of false promises.
	Is that like their ACDC in Def Leopard?
	It's like you've heard enough of that.
	This will not be your classic Arab rock.
	Oh, who you were seduced by the obscene songs.
	Like Cannibal Corpse and Rudimentary Peenai.
	You who listen to profligate songs.
	Do not deny yourself of the singing of the Virgins of Paradise with their pleasant voice.
	So like a ladies' choir.
	Would there still be no excrement?
	This is how I felt when I heard that guy describe what Muslim paradise is like.
	and i wish i could have conveyed it to him because What's that, brother?
	That's a drop.
	Yeah, you're right.
	That is a drop.
	Absolutely.
	There's never been more of a drop.
	These refugees are wonderful, by the way.
	Our refugees are welcome here.
	But the stabbing, it's taking some getting used to.
	Here's a guy just randomly stabbing Brits.
	Let's see if we can guess by the accent.
	Brits, you troll stabbing me, yeah?
	You want to try stabbing me in there?
	You know?
	Someone is like, leave him alone.
	What do you mean he just tried to stab us?
	What do you mean?
	Just tried to stab us.
	Leave him alone, you brutes.
	You want to try stabbing me?
	Look at this.
	Two perfect.
	The Quran and a knife.
	Wow.
	That's a good episode title.
	The Quran and a knife.
	I'm alright.
	What?
	What's wrong with you?
	I've found your toilet and you put that out on me, but I found him.
	Most hostile everyday carry ever.
	You know how I say don't wear flip-flops and crocs and stuff in the city because you might get in a fight and you don't want to lose your slides?
	Same with headphones.
	Do not wear your headphones walking around the city.
	This was a funny one.
	They went to stab some, this insane Muslim went to stab some British kids and he fell and stabbed himself.
	Nice.
	Perfect.
	Tell us what happened.
	What happened was the foreign man on the bike drove into a bunch of kids.
	All the kids like to the kids, right?
	So obviously run a movement or whatnot.
	So the kids have obviously been like, what the fuck are you driving at me for?
	So then he's got off his bike and being like, come on, come on, bitch, come and fight me, bitch.
	So like he said, come on.
	Then so this the young lad has walked up to him and being like, fight me then.
	And then he's like, but this knife out.
	So he's being like, nah, you've got a blade, you've got a blade.
	So while the kids started backing off, and I mean, there was little, little, there was little, about 14 to 17, the oldest.
	And then it would be nice if the English could learn English, wouldn't it?
	And then he started running at the kids.
	And then he's obviously got his knife out, fell, and then fell on his old knife.
	Is he over there and how was he?
	No, he's being taught now.
	And how old would you say the alleged paper title was?
	Late 20s.
	And how old was the kids?
	14.
	No.
	He was.
	No, he wasn't.
	He was.
	He was about 28.
	Late 20s.
	Got an old face.
	So there's a massive police presence in the city centre outside of Plan Mark now.
	I could only understand what them girls were saying, but I believed that someone's pulled a knife out.
	Run at these kids.
	Slipped and stabbed themselves.
	Fucking crazy.
	Let's see if I can get at him.
	a lot of view from up here What does the Quran say?
	convert or die?
	You fucking get your, it should happen.
	I'm sick of the Japanese.
	I'm sick of the Japanese.
	Remember, I kept saying, why don't they just pepper spray these people?
	I got an email from a British baby monster who said it's as illegal as a gun here.
	You're in big shit if you use pepper spray.
	Leave him alone.
	Leave him alone!
	laughs
	So the good news is the authorities are cleaning up and getting tough on crime.
	So while they import savage refugees who are trying to stab everyone, they're also enforcing the law and making sure criminals go to prison.
	Like this guy, for example.
	Or crimes punishable by 20 months in prison, waving the England flag, shouting at a police dog, crimes without punishments in the UK, kill with a machete, carrying a sword, cutting throats, child abuse, burning buses and shops.
	What's this guy, 3-1?
	Literally got away with rape.
	Yesterday, a child rapist avoided jail because prisons are full, said the judge.
	Man waving St. George's cross got two years today by Starmer's regime.
	Two-tier cure.
	All will be exposed in our upcoming documentary.
	So that's Tommy Robinson tweeting that out.
	Mass Newcastle data waves St. George's flag while confronting police.
	Jailed.
	So Tommy, I'm not sure where he is right now.
	I'm going to go find him and visit him and talk to him before his trial on October 28th, I believe, because his charge is terrorism and it's like 30 years.
	And with all the Muslims in prisons these days, he won't last.
	He won't last a year.
	So it's a death sentence.
	And what is the terrorism?
	That rally he had on July 27th.
	Everyone got mad.
	Well, no, I think people were mad at the little girls who were stabbed to death two days after that by an unassimilated foreigner, an African man.
	I think that's what set people off.
	Not Tommy's peaceful rally, where I think there was maybe one arrest.
	It's the behavior of these refugees that is pissing people off.
	For example, the intense perving that is going on all over Europe right now.
	It's out of control.
	Like with the Dutch, these Middle Eastern migrants, migrants, they share these videos of young girls on TikTok, and all the comments are like emojis about how they want to fuck these, whatever these girls are, 13.
	Yummy, yummy.
	Yeah, that sums it up, basically, doesn't it?
	Or here's an Indian in China, not exactly Europe, but this behavior spreads, is spreading.
	He just can't resist looking up there.
	I have another one.
	Come on, one more.
	Yeah, yeah, go.
	Or how about this Afghan immigrant kissing a German girl under the pretext of asking for directions?
	Guys, you're not good at the simping.
	it's not going well.
	Watch this.
	It's so gross.
	Is this cute to him?
	Look at him.
	He's like 30.
	She's 16.
	Yeah, great.
	It's a prank.
	You're on camera.
	Okay.
	Here's more of the exact same.
	Afghanis in Germany.
	I was just there in Berlin, and you know something's up when you see lots of satellite dishes, barbershops, kebab places, obviously.
	And I think that's it.
	Like the barbershops, Germans never cut their hair.
	So when you see guys who need a haircut every two days, you realize it's the Muzzies.
	German girls are coming back from school.
	Afghan immigrants are filming videos and showing them on TikTok.
	I cover the children's faces.
	Here's more of that.
	Lots of examples here.
	3-6.
	Like, this should make you mad.
	Afghan migrants recording videos of teenage girls.
	And then here's some disgusting Indians being gross.
	Guys.
	You're doing it wrong.
	Look at him.
	He's so disgusting.
	This is my girlfriend.
	No.
	This is my girlfriend.
	This is...
	This is my girlfriend.
	No, it's not.
	It's also going down in Ontario, Canada, where they're all just getting together to film pre-pubescent girls playing at a park.
	And they're getting confronted.
	How are you doing, guys?
	Warning, you're not going to enjoy how little this guy does about his daughter being filmed.
	We're here for picnic.
	Picnic.
	Where's your picnic stuff, guys?
	In the car.
	In the car.
	Right, you're here for a picnic?
	Is that what we're doing?
	You know what you're doing.
	I'm looking at you.
	The guy with the camera?
	Yeah, you right there.
	I'm innocent.
	This is a phone.
	Can I see the videos?
	Oh, let me see.
	I'll find the videos for you.
	They're right in here under I'll send them to you with the garbage pills app.
	Is that what you're doing, guys?
	This is private.
	You know exactly what you're doing.
	You're creeping all the girls here.
	I watched you guys.
	Yeah, you go get a bunch of dads together and beat them up.
	I watched him watching my dog camera.
	No, no, no, no, no.
	You don't come to a beach and videotape the girls.
	You know exactly.
	You can delete them all you want, but I got you guys on film now.
	Okay?
	That's nothing.
	No.
	All right, we got to teach these refugees how to perv.
	They don't know what they're doing.
	Yeah.
	It's embarrassing.
	Part of immigration and part of us welcoming refugees, welcoming fish into this country is helping them assimilate.
	So we're going to show you the proper ways to perv.
	Hit it.
	Will you show me nice pic of your bucks and bucks?
	You so butt you so show me over gonna send me naked shit.
	Shit, buddies.
	Bad bobbing.
	You're no good at the bobs.
	Looking up a dress.
	Fucking shit.
	We're going to give you a guide to some Piari Larkies.
	Some hot fucking ass.
	And we do this from afar.
	Here are some hot bitches for you to simp on from the privacy of your own home.
	And another key to simping, the way you know you're simping, is if you genuinely want her and fantasize about this lady being your wife.
	If you just go, that would be a good wife.
	That's fine.
	That's a good, healthy simp.
	Oh, shit.
	Where are my glasses, buddy?
	They're fucking shit.
	Okay, the first lady, simp session, is Anna Sophia.
	Oh, yes.
	This is considered by most people here in the West to be a 10.
	She is absolutely perfect.
	She makes food with fast, choppy edits.
	Her body is perfect, though she doesn't have very big bobs.
	But we don't care about bob size.
	What?
	I love a big bob.
	You love big bobs?
	I am the biggest fan of the big bobs.
	I think you're thinking of a burger joint, buddy.
	But look at this.
	This is the woman that you should be wanting.
	And by the way, when you're wanting her, you do it private.
	You don't go up and take a photo of her and say, you're my girlfriend, Ninko.
	You just do this from home.
	And for anybody who thinks this cannot work, what are these two buddies going to tell me?
	Listen, look, already a Middle Eastern man has his way.
	So it's possible.
	I don't know how he got in there.
	He listened to us.
	Play the audio.
	She speaks perfect Italian.
	She keeps saying the word help over and over again.
	Magical.
	Farina.
	Acqua.
	Polipaprika.
	We're super-coccando.
	Ungrattato and cornflakes.
	Some chocolate with your fish.
	I hate to be bringing it always back to fish, but was that a fish?
	That was a fish, yes.
	Anyway, so you see, maybe I don't know how he goes from simping online to simping in person.
	Maybe just give up.
	It's not going to happen for you.
	So that's a 10.
	That's your perfect wife.
	If you get to marry her, I don't know how you're going to do it, buddy, but just grab her and move to some isolated place where there will be no competition and give her an ankle bracelet and don't let her out of your sight.
	This one is very similar.
	El Orlando.
	She is a comedian with ties to Canada and Florida, I guess, with a name like Orlando.
	She is very funny.
	She mostly posts, what do you call them, stories.
	And you should simp on her.
	She does good jokes and she does good crowd work.
	And it's normal to imagine your life if you had married her.
	There we go.
	What's she going to say?
	You have a hot boyfriend.
	Is this your boyfriend?
	No.
	Who is he?
	Just a date?
	Best friend's little brother?
	Wait, are you getting...
	How old are you?
	30.
	Seems big enough to me.
	Funny stuff.
	A way to get her maybe would be to lie and pretend you have a magazine and do an interview with her and then spend tons of fucking money on that date.
	And then not nag and see if she took the bait.
	So that's another 10, two tens down the hatch.
	Here's another one.
	I got to get the glasses, bud.
	You pull her up.
	I think she is.
	Oh, yes.
	She is a rare Indian.
	This is very best woman with bobs and she has also variegated.
	So we're going to take looks upon her until she is.
	I'm back, buddies.
	There we go.
	You know, I think one of she's a mix of a bunch of tribes, but Native Americans are magic.
	They are the best Indians.
	We are the worst Indians out of both kinds.
	And she does a lot of stories.
	Now, looks-wise, she's not a perfect 10, but I like that.
	You don't want a 10.
	That first one that we got, the Anna Sophia, that's a lot of maintenance buddy, and you could never relax.
	But with Nizonia, go find one of her stories, dude.
	Oh, they disappear, right?
	They do.
	Okay.
	Anyway, she's a fucking catch.
	and you'd have a great life with her.
	This is not This segment is the kind of ladies you should be lusting after and wanting to have.
	These are the best we have to offer as the Western guys.
	Yes.
	Okay.
	Number one, two, three, four.
	Genevieve Atardi.
	I've mentioned her before.
	I think she's some kind of South, like maybe a Pilipina or something.
	She's kind of getting old, a little crow's feet and all that, which I like.
	I mean, you should like.
	This isn't about my taste, of course.
	I'm just a random guy.
	But she's a very active musician in the scene.
	We've mentioned her on the show before.
	I highly recommend that one.
	Sophia Carbone.
	I've been showing you wives up until now, right?
	Ladies that I think are single that could make a great wife for any man and who you should be opining and fantasizing about and wondering, what if, what if she was in my life and we had the horses and we could be the cowboys.
	Did you know cowboys used to be a gang in the days of Wyatt Arp at the O.K. Corral?
	I always rooted for the Indians myself.
	They would have a rattlesnake headband around their cowboy hat and that meant they were a cowboy, which was a bad word.
	She makes good food too.
	Okay, now here's a separate section for the simping.
	And this is called the warrior wives.
	They are wives that are taken.
	So you can't really have a normal fantasy or it would mean ruining a marriage and fucking up the kids.
	So this is like the ones that got away.
	Yeah.
	Mary Kate Delvey.
	Smart, driven, great wife.
	Fucking hot as shit.
	She was the one we talked about last week who had the trans jokes where she said, where's my dick, Rhoda, or whatever?
	Any video?
	I don't even know this video.
	I bet she's going to be totally great, dude.
	Begging women to be braver.
	We all spent the past week watching two men beat women on live international television at the Pidgey Fairy.
	I like her kind of like voice like that.
	Her nasally kind of thing.
	She reminds me of the kid at the kids' fair.
	He's like, apparently, I've never been on live TV before.
	Maybe you could pull that up, buddy.
	Just write apparently state fair.
	And this kid, apparently, when my grandpa hands me the remote, we have to watch the powerball.
	And apparently, I'm having a lot of fun.
	She kind of has a similar vibe.
	It was great.
	Wait a second.
	What did you think about the ride?
	It was great.
	And apparently, Okay.
	Tell me about that.
	Anyway, she's taken Medicaid, but fucking great.
	And that's the one that got away.
	So it's relevant for you to check this out, my friend, because you go, okay, so this is what I would regret not marrying if that comes up.
	Okay, good to know.
	El Malding, another absolute winner.
	She's got a real Jersey short kind of vibe.
	And she's pro 2A.
	She does a lot of man on the streets.
	Why can't we see her pics?
	You're not following?
	Oh, it's private, buddy.
	Private, buddy.
	You're logged into the wrong guy.
	Don't show the logins, but you should be logged into my fake Instagram.
	Oh, no, I'm just showing this.
	Maybe one of these.
	No, no.
	Here.
	Wait, wait.
	There we're going.
	Very healthy, gal.
	Some ladies, you can guess what they will look like when they get old.
	that one i don't know Quality content from Elle.
	Another one that got away, pretty recently she got away.
	Isabella Riley.
	She's here on the network.
	You're not allowed to simp to a married lady, but you can note that a great one got away and you would have had a great life.
	She's got babies coming and all kinds of shit.
	Got a link?
	There she is.
	Okay, yes, YouTube.
	Little heavy on the machiage.
	A little bit too much makeup, I find.
	You guys all know Zorka.
	Oh, she's plumping up a little bit.
	That's good news, actually.
	Muslim fucks, come to get me.
	I'm ready to start.
	I'm kidding.
	Okay, that's great.
	And Isabella de Luca.
	Okay, now here is a oh yeah, that one.
	I think that one is a single one.
	She should be up there.
	She's not.
	she should be up in the first category.
	She's wanted for J6, by the way, buddies.
	I would like to be her cellmate, huh?
	Lock me up and throw away the key.
	We've covered both the Isabellas many, many times.
	Okay.
	That could be you.
	Finally, we have ones that you shouldn't even think about.
	And not even like the other ones, what it was like, she was my, she could have been my wife, but I fucked up.
	This is like, don't even think about it, buddy.
	Of course, Kim Taylor Bennett, who looks exactly like Mary Kate Delvey.
	She's not like the previous category was warrior wives, where they're going to be fighting for you and all this shit.
	These are just very, very taken ladies who are very sexy and became great moms and wives.
	So keep your eyes off them, you pig.
	Same with Anna Paulina.
	She's totally married.
	She's a lady.
	She's in politics.
	I have met her in person, by the way.
	And get this ready for this neutron bomb.
	She's not photogenic.
	What?
	But she's so pretty.
	She's way prettier in person than that, what you see.
	That's a dog compared to what she is in real life.
	So she's an eight there, easy ten in real life.
	Oh, here's another one you can't have, but fucking hot as balls, motherfuckers.
	Jamie Mitchell.
	Jamie Michelle?
	You know, that is the gay who's trade.
	She's a total lesbian dude.
	So she's not interested in hanging out with you.
	I think she just got married to her life partner, but she's a Jew.
	And there's something about those lips and the way with the nose and the eyes.
	Such a great setup.
	I think her mouth is her best feature.
	You don't usually see somebody rocking the mouth there.
	She's dressed as a man for her lesbian wedding.
	But what a catch.
	Oh, hanging out with Tucker like it ain't no thing.
	Fuck me.
	Of course, Savannah Hernandez from InfoWars, total fucking raging hottie, but taken.
	She's got a baby, I believe.
	Not even close to on the books.
	But holy shit, you should have got, get in a time machine and see if you can hook up with that.
	Savannah is very unique in that she does not give off lady vibes at all.
	Her dad is a tough guy Mexican.
	And she's not in the least bit seductive.
	She's a real tomboy.
	Which is good in a wife.
	You want your wife to be, you know, balls to the wall, dude.
	Oh, who's that?
	Tim Dylan and Patrick David?
	That's Vince O'Shana.
	Okay.
	I think that's his name.
	And then finally in this don't even think about it category, we have Lauren Chen.
	She seems too pure.
	She seems maybe like one of these virgins that you get when you blow yourself up.
	She's got kids.
	She's got a husband.
	What the fuck, you perv.
	Don't even think about her.
	That's none of your business.
	And then lastly, I don't know.
	We have some silly mentions here.
	This is dumb.
	I don't know why these dumb bitches are on the end of this list.
	They're not.
	I should call these dishonorable mentions.
	This is the crazy bitch that was with that basketball mogul when she said he's his little puppy or something, fucked up and weird.
	Remember her?
	She's just got a very sexy face.
	But she appears to be fucking nuts.
	And she will ruin your life.
	And then, of course, total throwaway bitch.
	Yunchi Eunice Jang.
	Yunchi Jang.
	She was from Korea.
	She was sort of seen as a fat ass there because they're into the skinnies.
	But here she is thick and hot as shit.
	But what the fuck are you looking at that for, you weird pig?
	I don't know how old she is, but she's too young for you.
	So don't get it off this list.
	Anyway, guys, that's a list of some bobs that you should be looking at and not a bunch of 12-year-olds who are coming home from their fucking camp in Denmark.
	Okay?
	Speaking of that kind of Indian, Nita Fashions is on the road again.
	We are happy to announce that once again, our chief tailors, Mr. Peter and Anil Daswani, are visiting USA from 11th of September to 27th of October.
	It's pretty late notice, guys.
	We just got this like yesterday.
	So they're in New York September 11th of all days through the 16th.
	In Chicago, Dallas, Houston, Boston.
	Pull up their shedge.
	We'll probably do another meet and greet at the New York one.
	Let me see your bobs.
	I might do the West Palm Beach one, actually.
	I'll be in town in Florida.
	Palo Alto, San Francisco, Scottsdale, St. Louis, Obispo, Los Angeles.
	You go there, you get fitted, you drink some whiskey, you talk to the guys about various types of shirts you can choose.
	I describe it as a spa for men.
	One of the few places that men can be men now.
	We've got barber shops, shitty boxing gyms, not good ones, girls will show up, dive bars, and tailors.
	And of course, ladies have totally infiltrated all of these.
	But at least there's a semblance of male privacy at these things.
	Wow, long as hell app.
	I think we barely have time to get to the letters page, Rye Guy.
	That is true.
	Okay, buddy.
	Let's totally rock it and roll it, you fucking shit fucker.
	Let us go and let us be.
	Ryan, shut up, you don't have a dance.
	Let's turn our eyes to Gavin's mailbag.
	Let me touch it.
	I've been having these insane pains like once a week in my thigh, my left thigh.
	It feels like there's an electric eel inside of it, and it almost knocks you to the ground.
	And then it goes away, and you don't see it again for a week.
	And I looked it up online, and it said it's a result of alcoholism.
	Oh, that made me sad.
	That's a coincidence.
	That's what we call in the biz.
	Have you ever had that?
	Shooting electric pain?
	No?
	It's not shooting.
	It's like a sex toy is inside of your thigh.
	Oh, vibrating?
	No, not even vibrating, but like twisting.
	I'm just telling sex toy for the size.
	And it's sort of rotating and it's like sharp barbed wire.
	Oh.
	And it's shockingly painful.
	That sounds like, is it not a Charlie horse?
	You know the difference between a Charlie horse and that, right?
	Wow.
	Because those come on suddenly and stronger the older I get.
	Yeah, those come on when you're punched really hard.
	Oh, no, no, no.
	I'm talking about like a cramp then.
	Yeah, okay, thanks.
	Like it'll come out of nowhere.
	Oh, look.
	Sports drink boy out of nowhere says, hi, Ryan, because I followed his sports drink thing.
	I said, send me your drink, sport drink man.
	You buy some.
	Well, it's not clear.
	It says sport drink, so you think it's a drink.
	And you think you get four sips for 50 bucks.
	It should say powder somewhere.
	It does on the site.
	But like, wouldn't it make sense that he sends you at least some?
	So you could be like, that's pretty good.
	Yeah.
	Come on.
	Bakari Sellers has reacted to some of the controversy.
	Controversy?
	Controversial is doing some heavy lifting here.
	I don't know what that means.
	Thousands are calling for the word controversial for a controversial roast VP of Kamala Harris at the University of South Carolina, hosted by the founder of the Proud Boys, to be canceled over concerns it may promote white supremacy.
	This guy is going to promote white supremacy?
	Now I've heard everything.
	You're literally brown.
	You can't make this stuff up.
	David Cross calls Gavin's humor mean-spirited on podcast.
	Oh, we got to dig this up.
	On David Cross's podcast, Senses Working Overtime with guest Tommy Tiemann.
	I like that guy, Irish guy.
	At the 2320 minute mark, he mentions Gavin's humor going from very funny and acerbic to just mean and hurtful.
	He also states that it was a shitty thing to watch.
	Well, I resent the accusation that my humor has just become mean and hurtful.
	I just completed a segment wherein we were promoting a more gentle and equimineous love life for refugees and for them to assimilate their passions better into Western society.
	You know what that leads to?
	More love.
	That's right.
	You're not meeting any girls by going, this is my girlfriend.
	I'm helping them meet chicks.
	And before, as that was happening, but in hindsight, I could put everything together.
	The beginning of this just change to something ugly started with, the first thing I noticed was all the jokes were not as funny and they were really mean.
	And then it became just mean.
	It was just mean and simple and laughing at people, but without any kind of joy or funny.
	It was just the lack of, and, you know, it was a shitty thing to watch.
	And did that person, like, because there is a place for anger in comedy, isn't there?
	There is a place for destruction.
	Oh, sure.
	He's not a comedian, this guy.
	It wasn't comedian.
	But it was, you know, a friend.
	And.
	Okay, when I met David Cross, I was wearing a speak English shirt with an American flag, and I wore a screwdriver belt buckle, to which he responded, where did you get that?
	Meaning, I want one.
	His jokes are always far meaner than mine.
	And he's lying if he's implying that we were great pals, which we were.
	We bought land together.
	And then I just became evil.
	He ended our friendship because it was ruining his social life and was about to destroy his career, which I never really gave him shit for.
	I don't mind.
	I came at his wife pretty hard, but it's because she tried to encourage my wife to divorce me.
	So all bets are off after that.
	I'm going to mention the fact that you had an abortion a few months before your daughter was born.
	So in other words, you killed a child because she had the wrong astrological sign.
	She came a little too early and inconvenienced you.
	I'm going to fuck with you for that because you fucked with me.
	But I never fucked with David.
	And when I lost my ad agency in 2010 for saying trainees are just mentally ill gays, he totally had my back and was like, yeah, that's bullshit.
	I can't believe these people are overreacting like that.
	He's been a victim of this shit too when they killed his blackface segment on the reboot of Mr. Show on Netflix.
	So we continued our friendship through my controversy, and it was only much later in the game.
	What really did it for David and Amber was they have a popular celebrity Christmas party and I was there every year as was my wife.
	And then one year, people said, no.
	This would be 2015 when Trump, it was all about Trump, obviously.
	And then when Trump became big, it became very unfashionable to like anyone who likes him, like Gavin.
	So his entire scene was like, shh.
	And I've shown you examples of when, like, John Glazer said, sorry, I think it's finally happened, Trump has caused the inevitable.
	So to pretend my humor got too mean is just a convenient lie.
	The truth is, this guy stopped being my pal because I unabashedly supported Trump.
	And I'm sure he personally could handle that because we disagreed about, I was always a conservative when we were friends, and I bought him Bill McGowan's coloring the news, and I would try to change his mind on immigration regularly.
	So we always argued about that.
	But the truth is, the friendship ended because I'm Trump, and his friends have Trump derangement syndrome, and those two are incompatible.
	And I don't mind.
	What was I going to do?
	Say, no, I demand you remain my friend, and I go to your Christmas party, and I'm the only one there.
	We're friends, and that's that.
	You stay my friend, even if that means no one goes to your comedy shows and you don't get any more movies.
	I demand it.
	Obviously, you're going to be like, I get it.
	I'm a witch.
	Wasn't one of them like, we both knew this moment would come or something?
	Well, David never said anything.
	It was an interesting split where it was just agreed that I obviously, you know, don't want to ruin all your fucking parties.
	So, yeah, I get it.
	And then we just stopped talking.
	I sold my house because I was his neighbor.
	Not because of him, because we moved to the suburbs.
	But then, let me check my last text to him.
	Because you think there'd be like, dude, man, these jokes.
	Oh, I remember, I think the last one might be, he asked me if I Zeke Heiled at the Deploraball.
	And I was like, what?
	Why would I do that, dude?
	And, oh, shit, it's so many years ago.
	It's not coming up.
	I hope they don't delete old messages.
	Do they?
	I'd be pissed.
	And then he said, I'll tell all our friends the truth that you were not doing that.
	And I was like, don't fucking bother, dude.
	If they think that I was out there on a podium Zeek hiling, totally unironically, they can go fuck themselves.
	Okay, I'm back to 2016 now.
	No?
	Huh.
	Maybe I deleted it?
	Anyway, it's a lie.
	There was no like, what the fuck?
	This is so ugly.
	You're doing such mean jokes.
	I wonder when people lie to themselves like that, if they end up believing it.
	You know?
	And they're like, yeah, that was the ugly thing.
	And someone goes, can you give me an example?
	And they go, no, I forgot.
	Anyway, Ryan is gay.
	At the end of the show, when Gavin says it's time for the final video, and Ryan's dumbass says, Vidalis finalis.
	Yes.
	Which I would like to say I also hate when he does that.
	Too bad.
	So fucking annoying.
	I want to shoot myself in the face.
	If you are going to do the comical Latinization trope, it wouldn't be Vidalis finalis, you hard R retard.
	There is no L in the word video.
	It would be Vidius finalis.
	Well, fuckius uius es holeus bitchius.
	That's a great segue into the final video.
	And yeah, let's do it.
	Videlis Vinalis.
	So we don't let the show with the final video No!
	Thank you.
	Okay, that was pretty mean-spirited, that song.
	It's a mean song.
	Least I can do is say Vidalis Finales before it.
	Mean-spirited.
	All he did was laugh at people.
	His entire career...
	Sorry about that.
	I got very...
	Or remember he had a bit once where he was like, shot, shot, shot, shot, shot, shot.
	And it's a song by the...
	That's what they're doing.
	Yeah, the Yin Yang.
	Not them.
	Lil John.
	No, not Lil John.
	Well, it is the Yin Yang twins.
	And those kids that their dads are moguls, Miami, they have LMFAO.
	LMFAO.
	And he said, I didn't know what the fucking song was, and it was LMFAO.
	And then I realized, oh, it's young people.
	They all fucking suck.
	Their shit is garbage.
	And that was his joke.
	You ever have this thing where you're debating somebody, especially on a red pill thing, and they're not prepared to have, like, they don't know who Justin Trudeau is, but yet they have staunch political views?
	Yeah.
	And then you keep pounding them with, like, information, and you're right.
	And they're like, why are you such an asshole?
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	That's like that.
	That's kind of the vibe I got from that.
	I've been called me.
	Dave and I were arguing about climate change and fucking immigration, honestly, in 2002.
	So what's that?
	22 years ago.
	This idea that this thing took hold is just, well, it's a dumb lie.
	But yeah, that is so typical of the left, that whole, I'm mad at something I don't know.
	Like that girl who's mad about my talk saying, saying that I started a white nationalist band.
	You just should now.
	Like, you're clearly not aware of the, you're right, which is fine.
	I'm not going through the South yelling at black girls, black 21-year-olds for not being familiar with my various projects.
	But to stand up and say no to that.
	He made a painting called The Proud Boys.
	Different medium, broad.
	Now you should, just for the rule of double jeopardy, make a white supremacist band called The Proud Boys.
	But there was also a lot of news articles about this talk.
	And I've said this a million times.
	Whenever the news Talks about something you know a lot about, your town, your favorite band, you.
	You see how fucking stupid they are and how terrible they are at their job.
	And you realize, well, that's the thing I know a lot about, and they got 78% wrong.
	They're getting 78% wrong on everything else, too.
	You don't hate the media enough.
	They're fucking useless.
	We started this show with Mickey Nines, a Glaswegian band singing an ode to Maradona.
	And we will end it with Glasgow.
	I believe this is Glasgow, but it's a Scottish dub of Postman Pat.
	Scottish is the funniest language in the world, and everything they say is fucking hilarious, especially when they're portraying junkie assholes.
	This or this?
	This.
	Okay.
	Oh, for fuck's sake, have you pissed yourself again?
	Oh, I'm so sorry, Pat.
	I didn't mean that.
	I won't do it again.
	Pissed is pissed.
	Oh, Pat, wait a minute.
	I'm so glad I caught you there.
	Could you hand deliver this package to the DWP?
	They've stoked my state pension, believe it or no.
	I ain't bother, Dom.
	This package is awfully suspicious looking, though, Mrs. Smith.
	Are you understanding this?
	Yeah.
	This package is awfully suspicious, Mrs. Smith.
	Today's lesson, we will learn which of these six fruits hurts when you stick it up your bum.
	But, sir, we did that last week.
	Okay, sorry, I thought this was primary wands.
	Do we have any suggestions for today's class?
	I've got an idea.
	Why don't we go to Alawa and count how many single maws are there?
	You won't be able to count that.
	How many single maws are there?
	Want to go MILF hunting in Alawa?
	There's a reason why the Wayne's Faders Dear Runner.
	The place is an absolute wasteland.
	As long as I can drink Monster and listen to Slipknot, I'm happy.
	As long as I can drink Monster and listen to Slipknot, I'm happy.
	In a graveyard, you emo bastard.
	Up the road, you'd be happy in a graveyard.
	I think this is the spot he said to meet him.
	Martin, are you here already?
	Martin!
	I am in.
	Come in when you're ready.
	So nice to see you in the flesh.
	Right, get your grippers out.
	I'm choking for a sniff.
	Right, just look at his grippers, his socks.
	He wants to smell his socks.
	He's paying him for his socks.
	40 quid.
	And then if you want to keep the pair of socks, it's 20 quid and tap you.
	I hurry up, then I'm absolutely fucking erect right now.
	Good morning, doll.
	How's Trix?
	How you doing?
	I am alright, Pat.
	Like, how's your cell?
	What the hell's that you're wearing?
	Go to these for three quid off a TikTok shop.
	They're made for actual roadkill.
	Do you know that?
	But they're absolutely fucking barking.
	Get their mouth and get out my shop.
	I pat their brawl like one slip of your big toe and it's coming to the side.
	They're absolutely fucking barking, meaning they smell really bad.
	They're made of roadkill, and one of the eyes is falling out.
	Whenever I would go to pubs in Glasgow with my wife, I would just lean over and translate every sentence that just came out of some drunk's mouth.
	Here at the DWP head office delivered this for Mrs. Smith.
	Good afternoon, Pat.
	Nice to see you.
	Is that a parcel that's for us?
	Aye.
	Oh, that's absolutely marvelous.
	Thank you very much, Pat.
	Just let me nip inside and get a pen so I can sign this for you.
	All right, you get the idea.
	It's funnier the first time.
	Not as funny as Scottish Sesame Street, of course.
	Nothing's funnier than that.
	This was a free episode, free episode of the week.
	The entire thing is free.
	Thank you to Nita Fashions.
	Thank you to THC Extract.
	And thank you to Purpleworks for the privilege of providing this content free.
	Please go to compoundcensored.tv and pay.
	If you use the promo code Gavin, I think you get 20% off.
	We've got Milo Yiannopoulos en route.
	I believe Lily's coming on board.
	We have, of course, Anthony Cumia, Owen Benjamin, AIU, some major hitters.
	A Mount Everest of fascinating content.
	And again, it's a wee bet of sanity in a what old gone mad.
	Play that clip, Brian, of the post-apocalyptic.
	I honestly see it as a bunch of sane people stranded in a Democrat city like New York City or San Francisco or Los Angeles or Chicago or Madison, Wisconsin, and wondering if there's others out there that are noticing the fucking clown world we live in where Kamala Harris promises she'll be doing all these great things when she's in control while she's in control and everyone's smiling and enjoying it.
	is what Compound Censored is all about.
	Hello?
	Is anyone there?
	Do you hear me?
	We're in Indiana!
	We reach you!
	We're getting here another voice out there!
	Can I show the one I made?
	You made one?
	Yeah, it's the same thing, but just a little different.
	Okay.
	I think it's funny, because I don't know.
	I think it's going to be anti-Semitic.
	No, it's literally not.
	Do you hear me?
	I can't.
	I couldn't hear that.
	It's you.
	I'm retarded.
	Yeah, that sucked.
	If it's you, then it makes sense that that's...
	Jokes have to be legible.
	They have to be audible.
	You have to be able to hear what you're supposed to get.
	Thanks for tuning in, folks.
	We're back behind the paywall tomorrow and for the rest of the week.

▲