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Sept. 29, 2023 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes

01:42:20

S5E03 - BEHEADED BY CLOWNS

In the first episode after being reinstated by Twitter, @XGavinMcInnes, goes through every category we do here on GOML and gives a grumpy anecdote about each one.

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	Live from New York, it's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McInnes.
	Ooh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
	Ooh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
	Down yonder in Mexico, I met an old bachetto named Alfredo, and he rides, pulls in the rodeo.
	So.
	Fun band from North Carolina.
	Six piece called the Nude Party.
	Sound a lot like the Velvet Underground.
	Very Lou Reed-y vibes.
	I would hate to go to a nude party.
	I hope he means the political party that supports nudism.
	Because a nude party?
	Dinks?
	I'm not gay, but flaccid penises are unusual.
	Boners look better.
	But do you want to talk to like ten guys just walking around with boners?
	Boners?
	Plus the pretty girls are going to be the only ones that guys talk to and then they're going to be getting boner.
	Yeah.
	I went to a nude beach once and it was like gross, gross, gross.
	Oh, I'm getting a boner.
	Gross, gross, gross.
	That's kind of my life story.
	Gavin McInnes' life story.
	Gross, gross, gross, boner, gross.
	Gross, gross, gross.
	Oh, I'm getting a boner.
	That was what I was going through when I was a researcher for the kiddie porn squad of the FBI.
	I get instant regret.
	I was getting disgusted by that joke as it rolled out of my mouth.
	This is for all people.
	This goes out to the world.
	Let's go to our sponsor.
	As that was coming out of my mouth, I was like, I'm changing the channel in my brain.
	Yuck.
	We're done here.
	Yeah, it happens.
	Alright, people make mistakes.
	That was terrible, but you admitted it pretty quick.
	Sometimes horrible jokes like that are funny, like Louis CK's bit on SNL about how it must feel really good if they're willing to destroy everyone's life.
	Yeah, that was tactful.
	I want to do everything today.
	I want to do all of our categories.
	I've been meaning to do this for a very long time.
	That includes green screen, Ryan, so I don't know if I'm sized up for that.
	We'll have to wing it.
	But, uh, miscellaneous, me-news, uh, competence crisis, war on kids, cop talk, feminism, my pet Biden, racism, Proud Boys, LGBTQ, letters page, final video, everything.
	So you better have the things ready.
	Let's start with our sponsors, though, because this is a free app.
	I might make the whole thing free.
	Now that I'm back on Twitter, I could post it and say, this is where I've been, folks.
	Nita Fashions.
	Nita Fashions are my tailors.
	They sponsor the show.
	Look how cool the interior of this is.
	Can you see that?
	Yeah.
	It's skulls.
	Now, they do normal suits and stuff, but I sent them a picture of Jesse James.
	I love those old pictures too, where they all look kind of scared.
	I don't know, I guess they've never seen a camera before, so every picture of someone back then, they're sort of going, and Jesse James, you're like the scariest dude in the world, and you're scared of a camera?
	Plus, it took like five minutes for a picture, so you couldn't exactly be going like that.
	But I sent them the picture, and I was like, can you make me this?
	And they go, yep.
	And because they have all my measurements, fits like a glove.
	Yeah, not that Jesse James.
	See if you can find the one where him and I think it's his brother are wearing suits.
	I just gave them the picture.
	It's not like they have a template.
	From gunslingers.
	I'm embarrassed to know, I don't know exactly when he was from.
	Did you do a James Bond one too?
	Yeah, the corduroy, like, new James Bond one.
	Yeah, yeah, I sent in that picture.
	Problem is, with that one is, I'm not as attractive as Daniel Craig.
	So, he looked so cool with that beige corduroy suit.
	And then when I got it, I was like, oh.
	It's not quite as cool looking on an ugly oven.
	What did you look up?
	Jesse James.
	Gangster suit?
	Just look up Jesse James, old pick.
	Gangster suit?
	Is he even known as like a gangster?
	Well, the thing, if you don't type gangster, well if I didn't before and Jesse James came up and it was the motorcycle boy.
	I understand, but... Let's see.
	Weird tie.
	You need a weird tie.
	I love that.
	And they only had like, oh, there it is.
	That's the picture.
	They only had one suit.
	So it would be all broken in.
	It looks like it's waxed, right?
	Like wax coated.
	Yeah, yeah.
	And it probably is with dandruff and blood and grease and butter.
	So go back to Need of Fashion.
	So they're on tour right now.
	Check their schedule.
	I think they already started, right?
	Yes, September 27th.
	Friday the 29th, so they are currently... So they're in LA, Scottsdale, Denver, Seattle.
	They're in your town.
	They're near your town.
	Go there.
	It's free.
	They measure you up.
	They show you some samples.
	You can get a cheap shirt for 50 bucks, a fancy shirt for like 200 bucks.
	Massive range.
	Then they take it all back to Hong Kong and they FedEx you your stuff.
	It's a little surprise.
	It's very fun.
	And it feels good.
	It feels good to be pampered.
	We don't, it doesn't really happen in our lives and we don't go to spas because we're not losers.
	So we don't get our hair did and we don't, I don't like massages.
	I find them invasive.
	It's like someone's picking a fight with me.
	So this is pretty much the only time I'm ever pampered.
	That's not like I was complaining.
	I don't get pampered anymore.
	You know when last time I was pampered?
	Goddamn.
	Okay, so this is a Friday show.
	We didn't cover the Philly looting, so we're covering it here.
	So first, okay, so this is already the first category of abandoned, neat-a-fashions.
	The beginning of the show, it's sort of like the New York Post, or the way Vice Magazine used to be.
	Silly, newsy, funny stuff at the beginning, and then it gets more intense as the show goes on.
	Although that's not kind of that's really not what we're doing because looting is a major problem It's destroying this country and it's a great example of the Marxist claptrap that has shaken the foundations of not just America But the entire Western world and when I'm what I'm talking about is bail reform No punishment for bad guys, because we don't want people of color to go to jail.
	So people of color go, can I just loot and steal shit?
	Well, we'd rather you didn't, but I guess technically, yes.
	You could get away with that.
	Okay, I'm doing it.
	And then the media, of course, covers for all this shit and says, they're getting food.
	They were stealing bread.
	More gruel, sir.
	I can't even picture their scenario.
	Like someone with dirty feet and like an old t-shirt stealing cheese and bread.
	Where are they taking it back to?
	Like, are you living in a Dickens novel?
	What world are you in?
	Have you ever seen any of these lootings?
	So I got two videos.
	Big John sent me.
	I think he gets all his news from VidMax Viral.
	And they drown you in ads, at least on my phone.
	So this is a woman smart enough to film herself.
	Looks like it's been just you eating for a while.
	Maybe she's finally sharing her food.
	That's her pantry she's opening up.
	I'm sorry, is your name Everybody and you speak in the third person?
	You eat iPhones?
	And wine?
	- Nine.
	- Uh oh, look, here come more people.
	Let's go, let's go, let's go, let's go.
	- That sounds fun. - Let's go. - Every time, looting is just, it's like the Dead Kennedys song.
	The unbeatable high.
	Adrenaline shoots you nearest to the sky.
	I've never done it.
	I don't think.
	And I'm sure it is kind of exciting, but... What do you get?
	You never get anything good.
	No, they couldn't even keep the iPhone, spoiler alert.
	I can't even, like, if I go to buy myself something and I know what I want, even then I don't want it.
	Like, I got a shirt, uh, recently from that, that store.
	It's a Sex Pistols shirt from that store, uh, Search and Destroy in the, in the East Village.
	Then I got it home and I was like, ah, shit, this doesn't really fit me right.
	And I'm too old to be wearing this stupid shirt.
	What a waste of time and money.
	Or I get something off Amazon.
	I got a shoe horn.
	Because the guy I stayed with in Ireland was using a shoe horn.
	I got that.
	I put that on.
	It breaks.
	And I was like, why did I buy this?
	This is stupid.
	So that's me being totally focused on what I want.
	Running into a store, grabbing the first thing.
	What are the odds?
	It's like I keep saying, stealing Amazon packages.
	What are the odds?
	If you stole my recent Amazon package, you'd get a family board game and a shoe horn.
	Enjoy.
	Fill your boots.
	Literally.
	With the shoehorn.
	What's this?
	They looting Popeyes.
	Well, at least that's food.
	Popeyes!
	They wanted Popeyes!
	Popeyes!
	They wanted Popeyes.
	Nobody's smart enough to be like, can you stop incriminating our crimes, please?
	Well, I saw someone on social media say, download this and remember her username, because she's going to delete it.
	Right.
	But she hasn't done anything illegal.
	I think they caught her, though.
	There's that one video... Annoying me?
	It's funny that we were talking about how it's a lie that they were eating, but both of the videos we've shown have shown food.
	The one's liquor, I guess.
	All right, that's useless and boring.
	What a stupid waste of time.
	Totally irrelevant videos and I deeply regret showing them.
	The iPhones, they were just smashing them on the ground and pouring Kool-Aid on them or Sunny D because they were ringing and the alarms were going off.
	So they just were smashing brand new phones.
	Nice.
	Oh, really?
	The phones were ringing.
	Yeah.
	The alarms were going off, something like, yo, they're tracking us phones!
	They're tracking us phones, and... Okay, can I, uh... Okay, I want to cheat here.
	You can shut it now.
	Keep your feet up.
	I'm about to run me some good now.
	Yo, what's that sound?
	What's that sound?
	Okay, I want to cheat here.
	Can I cheat?
	Sure.
	We could try to go back and re-edit this, but this is just a boring riot that happened in Philly.
	It's exactly like the one in Union Square where that dude was giving out a PlayStation.
	It's not interesting, it's not funny, and it's not what... Make it stop!
	The only thing is, it's like I really, this seems unignorable, like some people are gonna be seeing this, and they're gonna be like, I didn't know that this is what they were up to.
	Doesn't look like their first go of it.
	Every time it happens, it's just, I hope it red pills more people.
	And they're like, this is happening.
	But like, stealing, I saw a guy stealing shoes, you gotta get your right size, so that's gonna take a second.
	They don't seem to take a second.
	Uh, and then, stealing phones, don't they just, doesn't Apple just block them?
	I guess they can get them, uh, jail-braked?
	Yeah.
	I'm so stupid, I don't understand that.
	They'd rather just take a thing.
	I really think they'll trade it for weed, and then the guy'll have it, and he'll be like, I got four phones.
	And then he'll throw them out, because... Yeah, he doesn't know what to do with them.
	When you get to be my age, you don't want anything.
	I want to get robbed.
	I want to give somebody their phone back.
	Yeah.
	And feel the feeling of, like, camaraderie.
	I want to get looted.
	I want someone to loot my house.
	Get rid of all the extra shit we have.
	A guy like K-9 Reaper will tell you that this is coming to America and like, this is just them having, if that's them having fun, I wonder what happens when they get serious, but yeah.
	There's just a bunch of terrifying stuff in South Africa that, like, this is child's play obviously, but I feel like it could get to this in the next ten years.
	Well, I like to listen to Chris Plant a lot, and he's on some DC station, WMAF, I think.
	You can get the app.
	Let me just tell you what the actual app is.
	It's a really great little morning news habit.
	It's called WMAL, the WMAL app.
	I think it's DC local radio, and he's He's awesome, that guy.
	He's also got a show on Newsmax now, but I don't enjoy it as much as his radio show.
	Plus, you shouldn't watch TV in the car.
	And he keeps calling them Democrats.
	Well, the Democrats are eluding again.
	And I mean, technically, he's right.
	But were those people registered to vote?
	They do end up voting.
	They get picked up by a school bus.
	Anyway, uh, we got to start getting through these categories.
	Let me also say hello to our second sponsor, Purpleworks.
	I'm on it right now.
	I did about six rounds of nonstop pads and it's with an old black man.
	And as you know, with old black dudes, they hit you in the head with the pads.
	Before I found Purple Works, I was known as a comedian, a provocateur, an iconoclast, and a well-read guy with a quick wit.
	Despite still being all of those things, it seems nowadays people just think of me as the muscle guy.
	I'm not sure what the fad copy guy is going for.
	Sounds like he's going for a raise.
	Yeah, but is he also, like, is that good for Purple Works?
	A lie about how I'm the muscle guy?
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	Heck, I would even say that if you're a whining rhymer, a recliner designer, a pickle briner, a coal miner, a shoe shiner, a grimy floor tiler, - Whoa. - Furniture consigner, or even a Y miner, this could be a great product for you to get you through your day.
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	The other thing I like about Purpleworks is You don't feel like going to the gym.
	You take it, you start getting the pricklies on your hands and you go, I gotta get to the gym.
	You don't have a choice.
	I've gotta come!
	To take Purple Works and sit at your desk is the dumbest thing you could do.
	It's a torture.
	It's like, it's like minute 15 in the sauna when you're like, this is getting shitty.
	Yeah.
	And you don't work well, I find.
	You're too sort of sketched out.
	But when you spend all that pent up energy at the gym, then you come here and you, you feel great.
	Yeah.
	I've absolutely done that too before.
	Like you take a pre-workout and then you're like, it's 30 minutes before you're going to work out and then something comes up and now you're like, just taking out the garbage like this.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, I've done that a bunch of times.
	I'm checking the lawn and I'm like fucking ripping the grass out with the rake, because I should be at the gym.
	I gotta say, ad copy guy, that was all very funny and rhymy, but I gotta call you out.
	I gotta push back on that.
	Weimarainer is pronounced Weimarainer, not eener, or however you wanted to say it.
	Okay.
	Weimarainer.
	I thought it was from that terrible time before the Nazis when like children were prostitutes and everything.
	Oh, a Weimarainer.
	I'm gonna say something bad that Purple Works might not like.
	If you have Purple Works, don't have a coffee also.
	This is your caffeine dose for the day.
	So have that coffee or this coffee, but I'm just saying, and I hope I don't get in trouble for this, don't do both.
	Yep.
	All right, let's jump into the first category after the silly miscellaneous things, which, by the way, I wasn't happy with my presentation until you, Ryan, brought up the Sunny D, and that made it funny, and now I'm happy.
	It's the truth.
	The truth is out.
	Time for my favorite subject, Me News.
	Make it up to me, you know it's better.
	I wanna believe in you.
	I wanna believe.
	I think this is my favorite Trump gesture. - Okay.
	Oh yeah, that is Trump.
	They said they told us to leave the tanks there in Afghanistan?
	Yeah.
	So I was in the Glasgow Herald, I think it's called Herald Scotland now or something, when I grew up it was the Glasgow Herald, and some beta male named David Leask summarizes not just the left's view of the Proud Boys or the liberals view of me, but the left's view of the rest of us.
	And their raison d'etre is slavery was horrible.
	They love, of course, that we killed all the Indians.
	That's one to harp on.
	But they don't seem to do that so much.
	And they seem to be trying to get climate change going.
	It doesn't seem to be taking.
	I don't know.
	There's too much variety with the climate for people to go, yes, it is getting hotter.
	Well, no, it's changing a lot.
	Yeah, that's just saying it's changing a lot.
	Now you have to prove to me that it's changing more than it did.
	And now I got to know about, you know, rain patterns in 1860.
	It's a tough sell, but everyone is racist is a much better sell.
	And black people are doing badly because of slavery still ingrained in them.
	And so the Achilles heel of that argument is white slavery.
	So this guy spent some time talking about how evil I am.
	Look at, and they always look the same.
	Look up David Leask.
	And that's by the way, the picture he chose to represent himself.
	So he's probably older now.
	I like how the bald guys will crop their head at the top of the circle.
	So we can pretend that there's something happening there.
	Oh boy.
	Hi, I'm a pussy.
	I have a soft unstructured blazer.
	Yeah, that sucks.
	That's like a blazer you get right off the rack.
	There's no shoulder padding in there whatsoever.
	If you wear a tie with that, you look dumb.
	And you could see the folds of the shirt under it.
	Wait, is he a music man?
	No, that's a different guy.
	Obviously.
	So he goes, he starts with the article going, one by one, his followers have been put behind bars and for long, long stretches.
	Which means if someone is put in prison, right, the prison is correct, the justice system was effective and you shouldn't follow this guy because you'll go to jail.
	Has it occurred to you that the justice system is fucking corrupt and terrible and the Proud Boys are in jail for, I realize today, 96 years?
	It's 88 if you add all the J6 guys, but Max and John both did four years for fighting Antifa.
	So that's just under a hundred years of sentences.
	That's not proof that they're wrong.
	It's proof that they're right.
	It's proof that they're over the target and deemed as an actual threat to the Deep Swamp.
	So what does the Deep Swamp do?
	It retaliates.
	What did they do to Martin Luther King and Malcolm X?
	Made him go bye-bye.
	Years ago, Gavin McInnes founded a far-right Proud Boys militia.
	It's a militia?
	As a joke.
	Now the shock jock is watching those he inspired, but no longer leads, go to jail for trying to overthrow U.S.
	democracy.
	Trying to overthrow U.S.
	democracy.
	There's so much pussy juice in this article.
	I feel like it's wreaking up the studio with fish smells.
	By the way, ladies, if your husband furiously washes his mustache after performing cunnilingus, it's because he doesn't want his mistress to smell the fish.
	So he should want to leave it on so he can go like this throughout the day.
	So if your husband hurries to the loo and you hear scrubbing after cunnilingus, you should be concerned.
	Or, I am gay!
	By storming the Capitol on January 6th, Mr. McInnes, despite faking his own arrest on a live video broadcast, remains at liberty.
	That always pisses them off, too.
	They're so Stalinist, right?
	They want everyone they don't like rounded up, thrown in jail.
	Though banned from many digital platforms, and I'm back on Twitter as ex-Gavin McInnes, he continues to puke a toxic cocktail of daft lad humor and fascism onto the internet.
	Nerd.
	This matters.
	And not just in America, but here too.
	Because Mr. McInnes, though born in London and raised in Canada, is of Scottish extraction.
	What?
	And then he goes on to say that I said, you know, if the Scots ever complained about what they went through, we'd have our own month.
	And I said we were slaves, yes.
	So then he goes on about how dishonest the slavery was, the claim that Scots were slaves.
	Scots, Irish, and tons of white people.
	Slavs!
	Slaves!
	I don't want to bore you with the same old stories that you know, but the argument that they use here is they were indentured servants.
	They were inside the house.
	It was the chattel slavery outside that was the real bad one, and you shouldn't compare the two.
	Bro, they tried to have the Scots-Irish pick the cotton.
	They died.
	They literally became human garbage.
	They were piled up on garbage day because they would get sunburned to death.
	They would bleed and blister.
	They couldn't handle the heat.
	Black slaves would make fun of white slaves because they couldn't handle the blazing hot sun on their pale skin.
	So they stayed in the house because that's the only place they could use them.
	So then he goes off to talk about how it's a white supremacist myth to even acknowledge white slavery.
	The white slave myth keeps oozing, he says, like slow-moving sewage.
	My God!
	We really are determined to erase history in order to fit a narrative.
	So then he talks about the Jacobites, and how this woman said thousands of Jacobites were stolen and sent to the West Indies.
	And he goes, it was hundreds, not thousands.
	And he goes, it was different because those Scotch slaves retained the rights of personhood, and they were not subjected to the extreme punishments such as torture, castration, or death, normally visited on slaves if they escaped from their master.
	Who says?
	Let's take the Proud Boys.
	Let's take the Proud Boys.
	If Mr. McInnes' jailed followers end up being on a chain gang, will anybody think they're slaves?
	No, because they're not property.
	They're people.
	Prisoners.
	You got that?
	So he's saying chattel slavery is like being a prisoner.
	Oh, sounds great.
	What a great pitch.
	And it's not like being a slave.
	Just like the January 6th boys, if they were out there chopping rocks, doing hard labor by the highway, they're not slaves.
	They're just prisoners.
	Yeah, that sounds reasonable.
	Yeah, you should.
	If you're doing 30 years hard labor for daring to meander near the Capitol, which happened during a police escort inside the Capitol, you should do hard labor.
	At least you're not a slave.
	Like, where's your fucking outrage?
	Leask?
	At the very leask, you should be disappointed.
	And then, of course, just briefly, I'll just recap the fact that white slavery was a thing.
	Jim Goad, of course, is the expert on this, and he even has evidence that there were more white slaves in America than black slaves.
	It's, he says, 400,000.
	Ten doses of 40,000, whereas black slaves were 360,000, or 320, I believe.
	This is just from a, you can't, it's so hard to find, too.
	It's easy to find the myth of white slavery.
	This show's getting a little too racial.
	This is footage from an old film that you're not allowed to watch.
	The Ottoman Empire's penetration into Europe in the 1350s and their capture of Constantinople later in 1453 opened new floodgates for slave trade from the European front.
	In their last attempt to overrun Europe in 1683, the Ottoman army, although defeated, returned from the gates of Vienna with 80,000 captives.
	An immense number of slaves flowed from the Crimea, the Balkans, the steppes of West Asia, to Islamic markets.
	Remember, the West didn't invent slavery, they alone abolished it.
	B.D.
	Davis laments that the Tartars and other Black Sea peoples had sold millions of Ukrainians, kirkashians greeks armenians bulgarians slavs and turks which received little notice grimean tartars enslaved and sold some 1.7 million ukrainians poles and russians between 1468 and 1694.
	but we meant to ignore that and i realize those are not scots but we're talking about white slavery now And then of course we had the thing we showed a couple weeks ago where Christopher Hitchens talks about how we had to invent the Marines because they were stealing so many of our women and selling them into this slave trade.
	1788, when the United States was barely a country.
	Right.
	It was having its sailors taken as slaves by the Barbary states, the states of the Ottoman Empire in North Africa.
	Tripoli.
	Tripoli.
	Shores of Tripoli.
	Shores of Tripoli.
	Ships.
	Yeah Bill, yell out words you've heard.
	Carried off into slavery.
	We estimate one and a half million European and American slaves taken between 1750 and 1815.
	Jefferson and Adams went to their ambassador in London.
	Sorry, remember what I was just talking about was hundreds of years before this.
	So America goes to the Islamic world and says, why do you keep kidnapping our broads?
	Because they're attractive.
	...the Muslim world of any kind.
	We weren't in the Crusades.
	We weren't in the war in Spain.
	Why do you do this to our people and our ships?
	Why do you plunder and enslave our people?
	And the ambassador said very plainly, Mr. Abdulrahman said, because the Quran gives us permission to do so, because you are infidels.
	And that's our answer.
	And where's Hitchens?
	He's dead.
	And where will this important point go?
	It will follow him.
	This is all being erased.
	It's not taught in schools.
	It's a lie to say so.
	It's a masochistic lie.
	And where's Hitchens?
	He's dead.
	And where will this important point go?
	It will follow him.
	This is all being erased.
	It's not taught in schools.
	And it's a white supremacist myth to claim that slavery was ever a problem with Dwighty.
	It's amazing how few people know, too, that 11 million were taken from Africa, mostly by blacks.
	Including the Dahomey tribe, which they made a movie about how they weren't the biggest abductors of Africans in the history of slavery.
	We had to go.
	Our problem with Dahomey, that movie has a big conflict.
	The conflict is the Brits were saying, stop stealing people.
	Slavery is wrong.
	And they were like, fuck you.
	That's my culture.
	Once again, appropriating culture.
	So 11 million were taken, about a million died, 10 million... I'm just talking about African slaves.
	3 million went to Brazil, we got 320,000.
	And then we lost the modern equivalent of 5 million with today's population, ending it in the Civil War.
	So I don't know why it just keeps coming up in American history, but I'm sick of talking about it.
	So let's get to the competence crisis.
	It's a competency crisis.
	It's a crisis of incompetence.
	This country is falling apart.
	Literally.
	We often do entire segments on the aviation and how dangerous it's becoming.
	I just saw a plane about to hit another plane.
	But I want to stray from that today and talk about building in general.
	We know Anthony's house is so new, he's not in it yet.
	His girlfriend's staying there.
	The roof is already collapsing and leaking.
	And it's not like he found some random dudes at Home Depot.
	I mean, he was with real builders.
	But they cheat and they move on and they get sued and then they're they disappear And it's it's getting worse and worse this studio How many times have this to you remember?
	We had those Mexicans who opened up the whole roof and we could see the sky Yeah, and then we go.
	Hey, man, all this dust is coming down on our equipment and they bring down a wet tarp Yes, please.
	Can you put a wet tarp on my TriCaster and all my computers?
	And then he asked me what he should do.
	I'm like, that's not my job to figure it out I sit in this desk and talk about stupid stuff.
	That's my job.
	The ceilings in the bathroom still are exposed.
	Yeah.
	That's a different thing, I think.
	Yeah.
	I mean the ceiling tiles are out.
	How long have we been trying to get someone to replace these bulbs?
	Oh, I think about... A year.
	And then when it rains really bad, my office, I have little buckets in there sometimes.
	And this is a very expensive rent.
	We're in the Bronx, it's not the nicest area in town, but that's where cheapness gets you.
	It's dangerous being cheap, isn't it?
	Yes.
	If I got a nice, if I got somewhere up in Westchester, or even where Anth Studio is, we'd be much safer.
	The why of things.
	But instead I subject us to this garbage.
	So Texas is a place where you don't need a license to build a home.
	What does that mean in Salina?
	Is that the town?
	Salina, yeah, that's probably it.
	Oh, in Salina, Texas.
	I thought the home cost 600,000 in Salinas.
	That's where all the Groypers live.
	They made a town for incels called in Salina.
	It's free porn.
	No, anti-porn, for sure.
	Incels?
	Yeah, well, the Groyper ones.
	The Groypers, yeah.
	I don't really think of Groypers as incels.
	I mean, they don't get a ton of pussy.
	They're volcels, to be fair.
	Yeah.
	This Texas-based builder brags endlessly about their commitment to quality.
	I'll let you be the judge.
	So, this is just a random sample.
	Again, when we do this show, there's times we've done two hours on the competence crisis and how they will not survive complex systems.
	And this is a crisis I've noticed really asymptotically ramping up in the past five years.
	So here I'm just dip, I'm just, I got the claw machine.
	I dipped it into the Kinder Eggs and I pulled out this one example.
	But it means a lot.
	Wow.
	Like, that's a tree fort.
	You know?
	The guy who built a tank for his son did a better job.
	Yes.
	Look at those screws.
	This is how you and I would build a tree fort.
	We'd be like, it keeps slipping, add more screws.
	It's just a pile of lumber.
	600 grand.
	Like, I wouldn't feel safe in there.
	And how many times have you heard this too?
	People talking about shoddy construction.
	Yo shawty, look at this construction.
	You wanna see something really fucking bananas?
	A viewer sent this in.
	This has been on Kamala Harris' Twitter page.
	For days.
	Yeah, yeah.
	Dude, what are you doing?
	Jumping the gun.
	Is that in the thing?
	I said we're doing one article, one story per category today.
	Damn.
	I have a million miles of typos, including Kamala Harris for months now, administration.
	Don't go dipping into the mailbag and pulling out things that I've already gone through.
	Fine.
	And you can see that that email's been read.
	It is.
	It wasn't pinned so I pinned it up there.
	Now that I'm back on Twitter I want to start doing threads again.
	I have about 650,000 pictures of people putting the dollar sign on the wrong side of the number and this morning I saw zero dollars down, zero interest, zero percent interest on a furniture store and it was not a handwritten sign.
	That's what's really, I guarantee you, here's my prediction, and I know we're doing more than one subject here.
	If you look up literally in like modern Google dictionaries, one of the definitions is not literally.
	Because people misused it so much, it became the rule.
	Nonplussed means surprised.
	It doesn't sound like it means surprised, but or sort of confused, shocked, bewildered.
	Now people have used it to mean unimpressed so often that that is one of the definitions.
	Nonplussed also means not nonplussed.
	Literally also means not literally.
	Literally literally means not literally.
	And I hereby predict that within the next two years, it will be acceptable to put the dollar sign on the right side.
	I don't mean the right side, I mean the wrong side of the number.
	And it won't be okay with me.
	There's certain things I'm not budging on.
	Society can all collectively say, sorry Gav, we're moving on.
	Fuck you.
	I am not budging on Crocs.
	No one's ever coming in my home wearing Crocs.
	I can't stop you wearing them on flights at the airport.
	I don't like that, but I'll suffer through it.
	Another thing I'm not fucking abiding by Actually the shower caps I can live with but these fake eyelashes you all are wearing poor ghetto rat chicks where they call them hood rat chicks middle-class white woman in Dallas Rich woman poor woman every fucking boxers girlfriend.
	I saw in Ireland in the fancy seats Everywhere.
	They're everywhere.
	I go to the bank, the woman behind the top.
	Like it's at this point where you would go, Gav, just move on.
	It's a fashion trend that you don't get.
	No, I'm not moving on.
	I'm right.
	You're wrong.
	Those look ridiculous.
	If you look at porn now, they're wearing them and the jizz lands, they're cumbrellas.
	Jizz lands on them and it sits there perched.
	A friend of mine told me that the song Umbrella by Rihanna is about her IUD.
	IUDs kill people and IUDs prevent people from being born.
	And she says, come into me at the end.
	She ends the song saying, come into me.
	What a dumb thing to write a song about.
	Why don't you write a song about your diaphragm next?
	Yeah, I think you did.
	Okay, let's jump to the War on Kids.
	Variety time.
	I had a sex change operation.
	Who wants to pound my back?
	We are living in an ageism era where children are seen as human garbage.
	Regulations to indoctrinate American school children with poisonous and divisive left-wing doctrines.
	On your feet, soldier!
	On your feet!
	Snappy.
	So this was meant to be a silly fun episode, but it's getting pretty serious.
	Before we get to the war on kids, let's talk about Patriots 1776.
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	Patriot1776.store likes you more than a friend.
	And then it just says, make dads look stupid in commercials.
	I think he just accidentally typed that in there.
	So one thing I like to push on this show is Americans can be very parochial.
	I think only a third of them have a passport.
	And when they hear about Canada or Germany or any other Western country, Australia, New Zealand, they kind of zone out.
	And there may have been justification for that 20 years ago, but now we all have the same problem.
	The same Marxist-globalist bullshit has infected the entire Western world.
	This is a German the German government was pushing this picture book to to schools these kids 6 to 12 years old Does that sound unusual to you compared to America it doesn't to me we've got genderqueer books we've got that book where the girl talks about wanting a dick because she's a lesbian and and pushing it into getting eaten out and stuff and wishing that she was getting a blowjob instead and that's all in the kids schools.
	How many times have you seen, here's a great example of it, you see these town halls and whether it's in America or Scotland or anywhere else the the politicians will say okay okay stop stop stop and they will shut down the guy who was reading from a book that his kid got in school.
	That's ubiquitous.
	Everywhere we see that.
	So we're all on the same page here, folks.
	This could just as easily be here.
	And you know, this could also be in the competence crisis because the book is schizophrenic in a way.
	The City of Berlin is handing out this book on prostitution to children ages 6 to 12.
	Rosie Needs Money is about a mother from Bulgaria who is forced to leave her kids behind to go to Berlin.
	Isn't it Bulgaria?
	And have German men rape her for money.
	Screenshots from the book down below.
	We can see them fucking and sucking there.
	So Martin then appears to reference pornography saying, it's different from mom and dad.
	Mom makes love to dad, but Rosie's men don't make love.
	They make sex like on TV.
	Oh, that sounds fun.
	Look at that.
	That's a stranger giving her a heart and then she has money to give to her little kids.
	We were just talking about the Weimar Republic before the Nazis.
	This is the kind of shit that was going on.
	You're picking a fight with some bad men and it's not going to go well for any of us.
	In the book, Rosie suggests that men use prostitutes due to loneliness.
	The men are lonely, just to be clear here.
	And advertises the sex trade as a legitimate and important field.
	That's a good lesson for kids, is it not?
	The book also explains that Rosie gives condoms to the men, which they put over their penises for sex.
	This is done to prevent pregnancy and as protection against disease.
	Yay!
	A statement that is accompanied by disturbing childlike drawing of a smiling penis with a pink condom on it.
	Now this is where it gets weird.
	Bizarrely, the book concludes with quotes from children and young people who live in areas where street prostitution takes place.
	Most of the sentiment is overwhelmingly negative and presented as examples of attitudes towards prostitution and youth, which require discussion.
	So you go, oh, well, maybe what they're doing is they're showing you that prostitution is bad by starting out with a positive thing and then having, no, they're lazy fuck-ups.
	They wrote all this out with the agenda of promoting prostitution and being woke.
	And then when they talked, that's a pretty good artist actually.
	And then when they talked to the kids, they didn't get the right answers.
	They thought, well, I'm not going to put words in their mouth.
	I might get in trouble for that.
	I guess I'll just stick it in there.
	And the fact that the children's testimonies totally contradict the agenda of the book is just like, oh, well, didn't work.
	That's my belief.
	Here's some of the kids.
	I'm ashamed to live here.
	I can't sleep well at night.
	Why is there no prostitution next to a town hall?
	Wonders one youth.
	I'm afraid of the Johns.
	Even though I have curtains, I'm afraid to change in my room.
	Why do we residents and the ladies have to suffer just because the men can't find a wife?
	Wait, are they trying to push this agenda of make it safer?
	Speaking to Redux, Ellie Arrow, a German advocate for the abolition of the sex industry, calls the whole book schizophrenic, noting that the children quoted in the book clearly don't want to see the industry normalized.
	They're suffering, scared of Johns and pimps, Arrow said.
	One girl astutely comments that somehow prostitution has not happened next to City Hall.
	German politicians are happy to enable prostitution and overlook criminal elements as long as they can take in tax heroes.
	It's not happening in their backyard, and it's overwhelmingly the mothers and daughters from impoverished Eastern European families standing by the street side.
	I used to be pro-prostitution.
	Not pro, but pro-legalization.
	Because I was like, I don't know, some loser down on her luck needs money, then there's some burn victim.
	But I think I'm changing my mind on that.
	I mean, it leads to dangerous areas.
	And it's not like that.
	I mean, in Sweden, it's a normal job.
	But I'm sick of comparing us to Sweden, although I just said the opposite about the Western world.
	I don't know.
	I'm kind of on the fence on it now.
	On paper, I think it makes sense to not criminalize it.
	But then, I don't know, as an old grumpy Christian, I see it leading to sex trafficking and sexual slavery.
	I mean, these women become drug addicts, they have their passports stolen, and then they become perpetually abused.
	So, in theory, there's a good argument for keeping it legal.
	In practice, it doesn't seem to pan out that way.
	Speaking of Panning out, let's jump to a new subject.
	We're all over the map here.
	Cop Talk is next.
	I have that bumper.
	Yeah, I do.
	Cop Talk.
	Well, it's because Cop Talk, I should be advertising the network too here if this is free.
	Cop Talk is, we have a show on Thursday nights where we have three cops and one felon, we call it Cops and Robber, and we go through police videos.
	Just like that live patrol show.
	And the cops explain to us what the person did wrong and what they would have done in that situation.
	And why this pattern is happening.
	And then Matty O'Dell, the felon, he'll often push back and go cops need to be kept in check.
	This guy's power hungry.
	And sometimes they'll have a disagreement.
	It's amazing how often though they're on the same page.
	One thing they really split on is Big John here hates those free speech citizens who go into town halls and cop stations and film people and check if the cops know what the civilians' rights are.
	And Big John's attitude seems to be, they're just a pain in the ass wasting everyone's time.
	And Matty's argument seems to be, no, they're keeping the cops in check and making sure they know what the laws are.
	Yeah, and it's not like... It's way funner than... When you think of cops, you don't think of these guys.
	These guys are fun.
	John farts on the mic very often.
	Dickman was trying a new character where he's cool.
	He's like... No, but he didn't know he was doing that.
	Yeah, yeah, I guess he didn't.
	He wasn't... He didn't say, I'm gonna introduce my dirty, hairy guy.
	He just started acting like a dirty, hairy guy.
	Yeah, well, you know... Did he have a lot of experience?
	It's kind of fun.
	Yeah, did he have a lot of experience?
	We have the cop bumper.
	And then we all go, when did you get so cool?
	You notice I do much of the original music, or at least the lyrics for all these hits.
	That's also because I'm cheap.
	For someone to make a song and graphics for the various segments they probably want 500 bucks.
	Why?
	I'm a band.
	I have had a lot of complaints about the Competence Crisis song.
	People hate it.
	It's a competency crisis.
	Maybe I should redo that and make it like personality crisis.
	This one's going around like crazy.
	And we would have discussed it on the Cop Show if I wasn't determined to get all these different categories into this show.
	But this woman, make it nice and big.
	You've probably seen this if you care about cop videos.
	If they're in your algorithm, you've seen this one.
	She yells, I'm sorry to laugh at a guy dying.
	Oh, that's a rude comment.
	She says, Taser, Taser.
	I think she shoots this man in the spine.
	I think this man is done.
	Blow it up, penis tits.
	Are we watching a snuff video?
	I think that man's dead.
	They're hollow points, right?
	And the cop, her partner was right underneath the black guy.
	Geez.
	I do remember this one.
	Shit, I shot him!
	You obviously heard the joke where somebody says, I hate when I accidentally pull out my loud taser.
	Yeah, yeah.
	Taser, taser!
	Shit, I shot him!
	Bitch, it's not like set the shit from stun to kill.
	You can't speak to your gun and it's like, oh, I didn't hear you.
	Everyone, when they see this, they go, well, obviously they should make stun guns a different shape.
	They are a totally different shape.
	It's all sharp edges.
	You can barely hear her say, "Oh shit, I shot him." Now on the show, we often talk about, I tend to denigrate female cops.
	I don't think females should be cops.
	I don't think females should be in combat sports.
	I hate watching female boxing and female MMA.
	It feels wrong.
	And they will often push back on that and say, no, they come in handy sometimes.
	They're good for domestics.
	They're good at paperwork.
	But I don't know I just I see them annoy drunken assholes because they see this little woman coming up to them and they go fuck you bitch when it's another six-foot-four dude who says look let's calm down we don't want to get into this they're like yeah I guess I don't want my ass kicked you look like the guy who beat me up last time I was being an asshole I don't want to do that but with a five-foot-tall fat-ass Puerto Rican chick Are you scared?
	Uh-oh.
	What?
	All right, well, why don't we play a game?
	Try to figure out which one's the taser, which one's the gun.
	Okay, it's gonna be tricky.
	It's actually kind of tricky.
	How long do we have?
	Is there a stopwatch?
	You're not gonna get it?
	I would just pick a random one.
	I'm going to say the black thing on the left is a taser, and the fluorescent green space gun is just a regular Glock.
	So the one on the right you think is a Glock, the one on the left?
	And on the left is a taser.
	It's a black taser that shoots out black electricity.
	I'll write that down.
	I'm going to Google it and see if... I'll send it to the cops and see if they can tell me which one.
	Dude, you could not... The only way you can make that more different is to have the handle be made of fur.
	And have a Pez Donald Duck head on the top of it.
	And you have to pull that back and it shoots out electric Pez.
	Out of Donald's neck.
	Yeah, yeah.
	That's the only way.
	Come on!
	That'd be a sick gun, to be honest.
	I don't want it.
	Can we get, is it legal to have a taser gun?
	Probably not in New York City.
	Nothing's legal.
	All right, we're jumping subjects again.
	Now we're off to feminism.
	Who here identifies as a feminist?
	Who here identifies as a feminist?
	We are the storm.
	The very form of change that the world has been waiting for.
	You said I was too pretty to fight.
	That's toxic masculinity.
	You don't realize how your behavior is hurtful.
	Before we get to the broads, Johnny Appleseed, been here since day one.
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	I like taking the gummies right before bed.
	And then it's seven hours of being at the movies.
	God, I had this dream last night.
	It was so irritating.
	It was on a loop.
	So there was, to do with Ireland, we were importing something from Ireland and it was like two legal things, so like liquor and bread.
	And then the third thing was like 2.5 million dollars of marijuana, I don't know what they're called, little cartridges for a vape pen.
	And I was worried about those getting stopped at the border and then getting arrested for importing illegal drugs.
	Okay.
	Normal nightmare, right?
	You're gonna go to jail.
	You did something bad.
	But it just kept coming back, hours and hours.
	It came back so many times I had to deal with these stupid cartridges, which I would never want to deal with in real life, that I started to analyze the dream going, why?
	Why are you worried about this?
	What does this symbolize?
	You know you're having a dream for way too long when you start analyzing it like fucking Freud.
	I almost got arrested in my dream last night.
	What would you do?
	I was with guys that I guess were Proud Boys maybe and then we were like just at a park but next to the park was like basically a foreign entity that had invaded America and their camp was like right there and I was like we're gonna get fucked over.
	That's that's what it's but it's odd because it's not like The America's government was gonna get us in trouble this foreign Almost like if the Nazis ran America sort of thing, okay Well, we're gonna get to that in the my pet Biden segment, which is coming up after feminism update She got arrested.
	That's her mugshot.
	She's crying Unpopular opinion I didn't see her do anything wrong.
	Hmm I mean, illegal I should say.
	She definitely did plenty wrong.
	Right.
	Immoral.
	She's just a meathead.
	She's a meatball.
	Okay, so this was an interesting take on stay-at-home moms versus guys who work construction and it's a good example of the lack of empathy we get from females, feminist females in particular.
	Okay, so Brian is not the default parent.
	Let me explain.
	Let's say Spider-Man and Ernie have a child, Kevin.
	Spider-Man stays home with Kevin all day.
	Ernie works outside the home.
	Now Brian, keep in mind that both Ernie and Spider-Man are working full-time hours.
	Stop!
	And it's just patently false.
	It is very strenuous for a mom, for Ryan's wife.
	She's got a almost two-year-old running around.
	And she's pregnant.
	Yeah, so that's a lot of exercise.
	It is a phase.
	They become much more independent around three, four.
	Then they're off to school.
	They're pre-K, I think, at four.
	So the baby to three there are three years you're pretty busy a guy works in construction a lot more than three years and Once they start going to school you drop them off at 9 you got 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 Six hours to fuck the dog while I'm cooking and cleaning.
	Yeah.
	I'm not trivializing that.
	We've always put woman on a pedestal and said you create life.
	And we love that you take that hit too.
	Because say you have like three or four kids, the first three year thing is going to spread out a lot longer.
	However, when they start getting older, you start getting help with chores and stuff as the kids get like seven, eight, nine, ten.
	But as Bill Burr points out, you can always press pause.
	It's called a screen.
	It's not encouraged.
	You're not being a good mom if your kid's staring at a screen.
	But if you want to go to the bathroom, have a break, you can just plop them in front of the TV.
	You can't do that in construction.
	When your boss tells you to unload a truckload of sheetrock, you can't put on a DVD.
	You gotta fucking start grabbing that sheetrock.
	And have you been on a construction site, my dear?
	Not only is it brutal and incredibly strenuous, it's also really fucking dangerous.
	People are falling, getting impaled with rebar, risking their lives on a regular basis.
	So that's a huge factor too, is the sheer danger.
	There's also, of course, the different weather in your house.
	It's 70 degrees at all times.
	Now, I don't want to sound like I'm saying housewives have an easy job and it's shitty.
	One in five workplace deaths.
	But what I'm saying is you can't say that your work inside the house, it's arguably just as important, but it's not as grueling He signed up for the more grueling thing.
	You know why?
	Because his life is worthless.
	Worth.
	Space.
	Less.
	So we as men are willing to put ourselves in more danger because we appreciate you more than us.
	Like the analogy I always use about the black widow spider, where as soon as he's done impregnating her, she eats him.
	This is hilarious.
	Most fatal jobs are fishing, logging, roofing.
	Male profession jobs.
	So, you gotta appreciate that.
	But they said, this is so funny, and when we judge dangerous jobs by injuries rather than deaths, jobs dominated by women rise to the top.
	What, like you blink your finger?
	My friend Jesse on his show the other day was talking about his first day at Starbucks.
	He walks in, he's working, whatever, and then he goes on his break and two separate women go into the break room to have a cry break.
	He's like, women have cry breaks, they're like guys have cigarette breaks.
	And he's like, I don't know this person.
	And then she starts saying out loud what is making her cry.
	And he's like, I don't care.
	Like women just crying on the job.
	I feel like I've seen that.
	While we're being sexist, women can't fall.
	No.
	Like every time they fall, it's a catastrophe.
	And there's a big black bruise.
	It's almost like they're hurtling themselves into the ground.
	And this is terrible.
	But I remember hearing about this woman who was killed in Central Park because a cyclist hit her.
	And I'm like, couldn't it just like rolled?
	Like my friend, my, this is even worse.
	When we were in Costa Rica once, my friend's mom was there and she had just survived cancer.
	Oh.
	And it was, it's pretty rugged terrain in Montezuma, Costa Rica.
	Like you shouldn't wear flip flops.
	You're going to fall.
	Uh, and so there's rocks everywhere and we're going up a hill and it's kind of late at night and I, I guess she maybe tripped on a rock, but she didn't do that thing.
	You know, you trip and you go, whoa, whoa.
	And you run for a few steps.
	Right, right.
	Catch it.
	She fell like this.
	You ready?
	Like, didn't put her hands down.
	Her hands were at her side as her face smashed against the gravel and her face was all cut up.
	Like, you can't put your... I mean... They're throwing themselves into the road gladly!
	When I was a bike messenger, I'd regularly get hit by a car.
	And you just sort of roll and you get up and you make sure your bike's okay.
	Yeah, I mean... You could have an aneurysm on a toy!
	So, I think that's God's way of saying they're not supposed to fall.
	But anyway, let's get back to her.
	Portraying construction as a party, by the way.
	way.
	Bernie's at work.
	He gets to talk to other adults, probably has a lunch break.
	He has a lunch break sitting on the ground, eating a sandwich from a lunch, from a lunchbox with his ass on the dirt.
	There's nowhere to sit.
	In the old days if you were lucky you could sit on an I-beam that was 50 stories above the city and risk getting blown away.
	And yeah, you know where he goes to the bathroom?
	In a spackle bucket they all share.
	So that's an empty bucket of drywall paste that they all take shits and pisses in.
	And the air conditioning and heating on the job sites really suck.
	It's really hard to condition the air when you don't have walls around you.
	Yeah, as Anthony points out with Anthony Cumia with HVAC, if the temperature is good, your work's done there.
	So it's either freezing in January because the heater broke, or it's a fucking nightmare and you're up in someone's roof fixing the air conditioning, but the second it's livable, you've got to get out of there and get to another place that is insufferable.
	By the way, men have not complained about this.
	We're only bringing this up because you told us your job is just the same as ours.
	Throne by himself.
	None of which Spider-Man gets.
	Spider-Man's looking forward to Ernie coming home from work.
	Ernie drives to and from work by himself, listening to a podcast.
	Yeah, I love commuting to the office.
	Isn't it great being stuck in traffic?
	Because you get to listen to a pod... You get to listen to a podcast too, my dear.
	I hate traffic.
	It feels like it's jailing.
	It feels like you're in jail.
	Like you know where your location is and you can't get there because everybody's stuck.
	And then you brainwash yourself into thinking it's good to change a lane.
	I like what Jim Norton says.
	He goes, sometimes you're not even mad.
	You just want to pull over and get out and lie down and cry.
	Have a cry break.
	There should be little stations along the 95 for cry breaks.
	He's home.
	Now, instead of going inside and seeing if Spider-Man would like a break from their full-time job, Ernie's out in the yard.
	Partying.
	And while mowing the lawn or washing the cars looks good on paper, Spider-Man has been doing the same job from the moment they woke up, probably until the moment they go to bed.
	How often does he come home and wash the cars?
	He washes the cars every second Saturday at the most.
	And mowing the lawn, yeah, you got to stay on top of that.
	So let me get this straight.
	After a hard day's work, your dogs are barking, your feet hurt, and you bust out the lawnmower because it's got to get done.
	If it gets any taller, we won't be able to mow it.
	And she's like, you bitch.
	You get to party mowing the lawn?
	It's so funny because she makes this whole video.
	But meanwhile, the whole video is the point against her of like what this poor guy has to deal with.
	Yeah.
	Like if she said he goes to the bar with his friends, I go, well, that's kind of fucked up.
	You should get a break.
	I'm sure he comes home and hugs.
	Who was that little kid?
	Ernie?
	No, he's Ernie.
	Whatever the little kid is.
	I'm sure he hugs him, plays with him and shit.
	But he's got to get the lawn done before it gets dark.
	Spider-Man wants a break.
	Spider-Man wants to do something else.
	Does that make sense?
	Okay, so Brian... My wife would never argue that being home with Daphne is the most awesome thing ever.
	Yesterday she was just laying down, she was trying to go to bed and then she got sidetracked just watching videos of Daphne because we're mourning her being an only child.
	Which is gonna be weird.
	Like the idea of her being like sidelined or something, but that's not how it works, right?
	It's just like a cumulative love.
	No, dude, it's bad.
	Really?
	Yeah.
	Oh, fuck.
	My daughter was meant to be an only child, and when my second kid was born, she was like, what?
	And then she was two, and I go, it's a gift for you.
	We got you a baby.
	She goes, oh, okay.
	So then that night she goes, I want the baby in my cot, whatever, to sleep with her.
	We probably shouldn't do that.
	And I think she immediately realized, oh, you're fucking lying to me.
	It's not mine.
	Yeah.
	And then she was weird.
	Really?
	For 10 days, like catatonic.
	What age?
	Two.
	Daphne has only child syndrome.
	Like I pick her up, cradle her, and I go, who's the baby?
	And she goes, and she just laughs.
	Yeah, my daughter's 17 now, and she still is like, eh.
	God, no.
	I can't believe you made two more of these fucking things.
	She was meant to be the main character.
	What am I, a chopped liver?
	Oh, man.
	Yeah.
	And she's not exactly the sweetest plum to them to this day.
	But you know, teenagers are- Let's just say something.
	Teenagers tend not to fawn over their siblings.
	Right.
	That's pretty normal.
	But besides everything that you just said, it's gonna be great.
	It's gonna be weird, dude.
	Damn.
	This is what the best thing to say to parents.
	It's a little heartbreaking.
	Is, yeah, no, you're right, that is gonna suck.
	Like when they go, I hear it's pretty rough for the first seven weeks, and I go, yeah, it blows.
	Yeah, I wasn't expecting that.
	Like you pray to Jesus Christ for 10 more minutes of sleep, and he's like, sorry, I'm busy, I got a mudslide in Mumbai to deal with.
	You're like, can't you do both?
	You're God.
	No, I'm God's son.
	You're praying to the wrong guy, moron.
	Well, it's all the same Godhead, the Trinity.
	But either way.
	Owen Benjamin's been having some trouble with that.
	He doesn't get why God would pray to himself.
	Right, well, yeah, I understand what he's saying.
	You know what was good?
	He was like, dude, I just want everybody to admit, like, it's confusing.
	Like, you have to admit the Trinity isn't just, like, easy to understand.
	It's true.
	That's true.
	So he's a very devout Christian?
	No, I don't think so.
	I think he calls Jesus like a zombie and shit.
	He's like you worship a zombie.
	Oh, he's a Jew.
	Yeah, I don't know what he is, but he believes in God.
	He just doesn't believe in any denomination and he likes what Muslims do.
	He's a non-denominational deist.
	He's a deist, yes.
	Despair!
	I'll take it.
	Let's jump to a new category.
	Anyway, just to wrap it up with that feminist woman, she's being an ingrate.
	We appreciate your work.
	It's very, very different.
	But if he's not going to the bar after work and dragging you through making dinner with no breaks, I think you may want to take it easy on someone who's mowing the lawn after a hard day's work.
	Plus, construction guys get up at what, like five?
	They're home at three.
	I heard my friend telling me too, he's like, dude, we fight, we argue on the job site.
	It's so stressful, like every day.
	Then at the end, we're like, it's cool.
	But like, there's fights every single day.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	Fuck you, you fucking idiot!
	That's how jobs get done.
	And there's going to be conflict because it's important.
	Like, I don't want to go up there.
	It's not ready.
	And if I go through, I'm going to die.
	You're trying to kill me.
	You're trying to fucking kill me!
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	Every mistake is a failure.
	Like, if you're wrong about what we're arguing about, my life is in danger.
	Yeah.
	It's not like the watercolor is going to come out looking really gross.
	If you're wrong with a kid, there's days where you can be a total fuck-up and let them watch, like, four hours of TV.
	You feel pretty guilty after.
	Okay, My Pet Biden, another category.
	Wait, that doesn't rhyme.
	Biden.
	A monster of a...
	President.
	He's big and blue.
	Sleepy.
	But a friendly monster too.
	My pet.
	Biden.
	Wait, what?
	That doesn't rhyme.
	I think that's, besides the Beastie Boys final video, I think that might be our best song. - Yeah.
	The song?
	Yeah.
	And it's funny because it's just a song with some overdubs from you.
	Yeah.
	And the video too is just faces on an existing video.
	So this is going around and it's Actually, the story itself annoys me in many ways, and not for the reasons everyone else is annoyed.
	So people are pissed at Biden for calling him that boy, which is fine.
	Like, my bartender is 60, 4, I'm 53, he calls me young man.
	The Knights of Columbus guys are in their 70s, they would call me that boy and young man.
	But it's racist to call black people boy.
	He didn't say boy!
	He said, that boy, meaning he's much younger than me.
	And he pronounced his idiotic name wrong.
	Can we just make it clear that this person's name is more embarrassing than Cedric the Entertainer?
	Ladies Love.
	Hi, my name's Ladies Love Cool G. Ladies Love Cool Gavin.
	My name's Cool Gavin.
	That's the name I gave myself.
	And women are obsessed with how awesome I am.
	So just call me Ladies Love Cool Gavin.
	I'm gonna make that the title.
	I remember learning that my uncle told me it's LL stands for ladies love and I was like well then isn't his name just Cool J and LL is kind of just a comment.
	Yeah it's just a way to describe Cool J. As a child I was like so his name is Cool J. It's embarrassing.
	Cedric the Entertainer.
	That's your name?
	You sound like a party clown.
	Let me guess you're an entertainer?
	Anyway, you're supposed to be mad that LL Cool J was blasphemed.
	- For those who serve across my administration, like the Secretary of Harvard Affairs, great Marshall Fudge, who joined by several-- - This is exactly how I read when I can't see the text.
	Like if we get an ad printout and it's a size six font, I'm like, look, it also explains that Rosie gives condescens to the men which they put on their penises for sex.
	It's done to prevent pregnancy.
	You can't see, you gotta make the font bigger.
	It has, judging by how out of it this dementia patient is, I think like the letter C has to be this big.
	You can put one word Per screen.
	Your cue cards are like the church post signs outside.
	Yeah, he could read God hates fags.
	Fred Phelps.
	Fred Phelps should be doing his cue cards.
	A Pizza Hut special.
	He skims too.
	He's like, "The book also is done to prevent pregnancy and is the protection against disease." - He looks like he's just mulling it over before he goes and says it as a speech.
	No, dude, you're at the podium.
	This is the speech, you dementia patient.
	- Captain, tonight's award is Hakeem Jeffries, the leader with integrity and courage.
	Courage, courage.
	- Okay, stop.
	This is courage, courage, courage.
	So this is, he's commemorating incredible leadership and courage.
	This is the leader of the free world the most powerful man in the world and the most powerful man in history He's more powerful than Genghis Khan and Napoleon as far as the power he has right now.
	So we're looking at not only the most powerful man in the world, but the most powerful man in history.
	And he's awarding a rapper.
	An award for leadership and courage.
	Like this is our most, I hate him, don't get me wrong, but this is our most important guy and he's spending time out of his day to commemorate Cedric the Entertainer, Eminem, Run DMC, like what are you doing?
	Didn't he never even go out to Ohio after that huge spill?
	He just sent Buttigieg, right?
	Yeah, yeah, he said he didn't want to get in the way.
	I don't like being in Hawaii.
	Same with Hawaii, he didn't want to get in the way.
	But he'll get in the way of LL Cool J and then what's the reaction?
	You didn't do a good job.
	You said ladies love Cool J wrong and you said boy and you blasphemed our God.
	We're living in a black aristocracy, a black monarchy at this point.
	And LL Cool J sucks.
	He's in a corny drama like a cop drama where they all wear you new clothes.
	It's the kind of thing that a maid at a hotel watches when she's cleaning the bed.
	Like no one sits down and watches NCIS or whatever the fuck it's called.
	It's all it's a soap opera.
	It's a cop soap opera for maids.
	That's what he's on.
	And as far as the songs, Mama Said Knock You Out was kind of corny.
	But before that, there was no other hits except the early, early days of rap with that going back to Cali and all that stuff.
	So he had a few hits in the 80s when rap began.
	Big Break, Mama Said Knock You Out.
	OK, so pretty much every rapper.
	I think MC Light was also commemorated there for her incredible contribution to society.
	- Yeah, he was always doing this too, he's going... - Yeah, his whole thing is that he's sexy.
	How embarrassing is a sexy man?
	Hey, what's up?
	Ladies love me, you probably want to blow me, right?
	Look at the smoky eyes!
	I'm so gorgeous.
	That thing.
	He should win the embarrassing award.
	And like look at my gorgeous eyes.
	He's Zoolander!
	He's doing Zoolander.
	What a corny turd.
	Jigaboolander.
	I'm sorry.
	That's terrible.
	That's not funny.
	I know.
	I know.
	I apologize.
	On the free episode too.
	Alright Mr. Child Rape.
	Take that back.
	A visionary American mayor does whatever she says he's going to do.
	The Korean Jean-Pierre, my press secretary. - Sure.
	No wonder I'm doing okay.
	And Justin Jones, a new voice that gives us hope for the future, Justin.
	And two of the great artists of our time representing the groundbreaking legacy of hip-hop in America, LLJ Cool J.
	LLJ Cool J. So much, like I hate, Joe Biden is incompetent.
	He should be in an old folks home.
	But that being said, you got to work with the cards you're dealt.
	Someone's got to work with this guy's teleprompter.
	I heard Tucker Carlson, he needs glasses, but he doesn't like wearing them, so his teleprompter is like the size of a movie theater screen, which is why on Tucker Carlson Tonight, you'd see his eyes go like this.
	At least he could read them, though.
	I didn't like watching his eyes go like he was at a tennis match, but that's what Joe needs.
	He cannot read these little things.
	What's that?
	say that again?
	That boy's got a great legacy of hip hop in America.
	LLJ Cool J.
	By the way, that boy's got...
	That man's got biceps bigger than my thighs.
	I think he's...
	Yes he's a strong muscle man.
	So he's actually not guilty it's racism it's more like cultural appropriation be like that boy good like that sort of thing.
	Well he also he also is a hundred years old he probably does think of blacks as like boy.
	He probably is like the kind of genuine racist that it's not even bad.
	He doesn't even know it's bad.
	It's just like, I love them dancing around.
	I want to get one.
	I want to have one in the house.
	Are you kidding?
	Spain's my favorite suite of cars.
	They got big muscles.
	They got muscles like my legs.
	And they're always doing the rhyming stuff with the microphone.
	How can I be a racist, man?
	I got a color TV.
	But you don't want to live in a racial jungle.
	I don't want them with my kids or nothing.
	Oh yeah, I forget he said that.
	Like, look at this guy, 2-0.
	This is just as absurd.
	So this is a dude, Anthony put this up.
	He wrote a bunch of stupid songs.
	He was in NCIS.
	Does he get an award?
	Oh, interesting.
	He was sampled by Dr. Dre and Snoop and others.
	I didn't know that.
	Yeah, very great quality, you know.
	No way.
	That's like the biggest part of the song.
	Wait, what?
	Alright, my mind's blown.
	There you go.
	That's amazing.
	That song rules.
	I don't want the president giving him an award.
	Either.
	You made some music and then you did some soap operas.
	I'm glad you enjoyed America's Resources and you made lots of money and you were popular and successful.
	Congratulations, but no awards.
	And then what do we get?
	We get the Vietnam guy.
	He puts his fucking Congressional Medal of Honor on him, then it's like...
	What?
	What's going on?
	Just walks away.
	Leaves the poor bastard standing there.
	Um... Racism is another subject we cover.
	I'm a black female.
	What other different... What else could I have done to piss you off?
	A black woman?
	This is really inconvenient.
	Stop raising!
	I have a dream.
	Oh, Black Betty, bam, bam.
	Oh, Black Betty, bam, bam.
	Black Betty had a child.
	I might miss my Trezane.
	Ah, I got 50 minutes.
	26.
	This is fascinating.
	And it deserves an hour, but we're just giving one story per segment.
	Texas Sex Offender Registry Analysis, Unbiased Crime Report.
	On Twitter, I download the entire database, 101,000 offenders, and can now easily query it to identify entries with incorrect race, ethnicity.
	Here are the numbers so far.
	Whites, 35,000.
	Hispanics, 32,000.
	Blacks, 20,000.
	- 10,000 Hispanics, 32,000 blacks, 20,000 unknown, 12,000 Asians, none. Others, none.
	Unknown, 12,000.
	I must rape you.
	So is this what he started with or where he's ended up?
	Because when you look at the population of America, it's not a third, third, third.
	It's more like, well, depending again with Hispanics, 65, 15, 20, 20% being Hispanic, 15, 13 being black, 65. $700 billion and $1,300 million billion.
	So I believe this is just sexual assault.
	I believe this is true of all of America's crime stats.
	They are taking non-whites and making them white to make the numbers less hard to deal with, hard to stomach.
	And it's ironic because the argument for America being racist is that we lie and cheat and steal to make black people look bad, but it's the exact opposite.
	We lie and cheat and steal to make white people look bad to make black people look better.
	But anyway, this is a fascinating thread.
	You can dig it up yourself.
	Go down.
	Some of the people.
	Okay, with a simple query like this, I can identify lots of Hernandez's incorrectly marked as non-Hispanic white.
	Non-Hispanic.
	Not Hispanic white.
	Hernandez is a non-Hispanic white.
	And look at him.
	He's pretty darn Hispanic.
	Edward Lorenzo.
	It gets Eduardo Lorenzo Hernandez.
	That's like a parody of a Spanish name.
	You could not get more Hispanic than that name.
	Look at the other ones.
	Here's his population versus offenders chart with the incorrect data Asians are the missing 1% Okay, so what wait go back so What's that?
	What's the blue there?
	I've got Joe Biden eyes.
	Population and sex offenders.
	Okay, so white, the population and the sex offenders are about the same.
	Black, more than the population.
	And Hispanic, slightly less sex offenders than they're represented in the population.
	So we're right on par.
	If you see a white guy, he's a sex offender according to that incorrect data.
	Keep going down.
	So this is slightly more accurate and you'll see that blacks and Hispanics are wildly overrepresented and we are in fact underrepresented.
	We being me, not you, Ryan.
	You're a Puerto Rican Japanese guy.
	That's correct.
	Keep going down though.
	Look at some of these non-Hispanic whites.
	Enoch G. Roches Valencia.
	He's a non, that's a white person you're looking at.
	Does he identify as white?
	Is that what they're doing?
	No, they identify him as white.
	Whitey.
	Kill whitey.
	Here's another non-Hispanic white.
	Perusing through sex offender registries all over the country, I've found thousands of Hispanics, Asians, Native Americans, and even blacks listed as white, yet I've never seen the opposite.
	See, this is why autistic people are so important in society.
	Who has the time to do this?
	And it's a very important piece of information.
	Here's another guy, Davey Harrison, white as can be.
	Anyway, that goes on and on and on.
	I just caught up on, I got the Partridge Family DVD set.
	This show is very serious, unlike our other shows.
	So that's, I want to, oh shit, I forgot!
	Before we left racism, we had to do a green screen about Biden.
	Oh shit.
	Oh well, it's out of order.
	What are the three scenarios with the next election?
	Scenario one, President Newsom.
	I know you think that Kamala Harris would immediately become the president if Joe steps down.
	No, not if, while they're choosing the candidates, Joe declares that he has a medical emergency.
	He won't have to say what it is.
	We can all pretend it's COVID.
	That will help because I think in almost all scenarios they bring COVID back And there's a lot of mail-in votes and the DNC can fix the election again.
	That's right.
	Proud Boys are in jail for 88 years for being correct about election fraud.
	So they make him the nominee, Gavin Newsom, awesome first name, and then they fix the election.
	He wins.
	We have four years of Newsom and Harris.
	It'll be more of the same.
	It'll be terrible.
	It'll be possibly irreparable damage.
	I would say it would be about 3.6% less bad than four more years of Biden, but that's real, real bad.
	So, uh, I think this is the most likely scenario, but we'll see.
	Option two.
	President Biden.
	So, he does the COVID thing, just like Newsom.
	He stays in office.
	Now, I have a pretty vivid imagination.
	I think I'm good at thinking of stuff.
	I can't think.
	This doesn't fit in my head.
	Like, if you said, what if America alone and nowhere else lost gravity?
	I could start imagining cars floating around.
	Like, I can wrap my head around that ridiculous science fiction scenario.
	I just, like, when you have dementia, when you have Alzheimer's, whatever the fuck he has, it's not bone cancer, it's not a nine-year decay, it's JUMF!
	And we've seen it!
	Like every time you see him fall, the next time it's worse.
	Every time you see him screw up a speech, the next speech is not a little bit worse, it's way, way worse.
	He's getting exponentially worse.
	So multiply that by even the next year, he's going to be really, really bad by the next election, I promise you that.
	Then add four more years, he's not living four more years, first of all.
	But his brain's already dead.
	So that could be a scenario where Kamala Harris would have to become president.
	Maybe Hillary is vice president after he dies, you know, a year into his term.
	So that's an absolute.
	You'll notice all of these options are shit shows.
	The future does not look good.
	Well, if Trump wins, but he might be in jail.
	Okay, third scenario.
	We've been picking fights with China.
	They've had their missiles pointed at us for decades now.
	They've been waiting for a moment to strike.
	If you were waiting to strike America, do you think the relentless, tranny military, the Down Syndrome president, the economic weakness, wouldn't this be the perfect time to strike?
	So, America does something dumb with Taiwan, declares it independent.
	China says, all right, fuck this, it's on.
	And then we're at war with China.
	At the same time, some moron decided we should fight Russia via Ukraine.
	So we are currently in a war with Russia.
	Now, it's by proxy with Ukraine, but that's just going to keep ramping up.
	So now we have a war with China and Russia.
	Now what the deep state, what the globalists can do with that is say, there's some weird law, I forgot the name of, it's like from 1790 or something and it says in a state of war they can withhold elections because we have higher priorities.
	So Biden remains president that way.
	This is sort of a version of number two where Biden has to stay in president as president because we're at war.
	And then they can just sort of hide trillions of dollars and make up for all their fuck-ups by saying it's war.
	It's China and Russia that have ruined America, not me.
	So, these three scenarios are life without Trump, and they suck.
	"A Chinese asshole!" "Come here still, cause you got enough dough to get you over the hill, you can kick back." So yeah, we got the racial stats, right?
	Something's going very wrong with them.
	You're being lied to.
	And I thought it was Eric Holder when he was DA.
	He said him and Obama decided not even to record race and crime.
	So that's another way to play with the stats.
	Just delete them.
	All right, Proud Boys.
	Stand back.
	Stand by.
	Proud Boys.
	Proud Boys.
	Somebody's got to do something about Antifa and the left.
	Antifa's an idea, not an organization.
	Oh, you got it.
	- Is that a Frank Zappa tattoo?
	So remember in the in the war on kids thing where we said they talked about how great prostitution is then they interviewed a bunch of kids and the kid said no I fucking hate it and they went yeah whatever put that in I already got my grant money from the government brutal incompetence they're not sending their best and the the clowns
	that are infiltrating Western society and destroying lives and throwing men and we're not like at least the KGB and the old FBI the CIA that killed all the Black Panthers at least they were qualified they were evil but they were worthy adversaries these new adversaries are fucking mental patients This is who's ruining our lives.
	Can't we have like a Hitler type guy ruin our lives?
	At least he's scary.
	And that adds to the insult.
	Like you're going to get beheaded by a clown.
	Yeah.
	You know, it's like you're going to die with a teddy bear.
	That's maybe a better title for today's show.
	Beheaded by a clown.
	Or by clowns.
	Yeah, look at this guy.
	These are the same people.
	And that's not even the weirdest part about Ukraine's transsexual American-born spokesperson.
	I'm following.
	Him.
	Who threatened to kill those who oppose Zelensky.
	There he is.
	It's crazy.
	Wait, go up a bit.
	This is also the same person who infiltrated the Nevada GOP and worked to bring Proud Boys to Trump rallies.
	Not even sure what that means, but when you realize everything is a psyop and you aren't crazy, it all starts to make sense.
	So this is the kind of guy who is luring patriots into dangerous situations so they can be put away.
	What a mess.
	Can you click on that link?
	Dem who masquerade as Republican oust Fiore from council.
	Look at this clown.
	And I think they've since cancelled him as the American spokesperson.
	Oh yeah, and I saw something today where he claims that the Russians have used my face in an AI deepfake to try to turn me against blah blah blah.
	I've seen endless videos with this guy walking around just being weird and like, you know, after a battle or something, guys are cleaning their rifles.
	Well, let's see one.
	Ashton Cirillo.
	Yeah.
	And then the funny thing is, is all these video games, all these videos that she posts, he, um, there'll be like three seconds left and you're like, please say Slava Ukraini.
	Cause he, he says that at the end of it, Slava Ukraini!
	Like all, like... Oh, that little gay guy.
	Ugh.
	All right, I'm bored of him already.
	Wait, wait, here's one.
	It's good.
	Wait, what the fuck?
	I like the pictures they choose of themselves.
	It won't bring me to that one.
	I guess maybe it got deleted.
	That sucks.
	Here it is.
	Here's the one that, uh... Yeah, she's got suspended.
	Here's her taunting message.
	Russia hates the truth that their obsessive focus on a Ukrainian volunteer... Sounds like Elijah Schaefer.
	...simply wanted the light of the Ukrainian nation's honesty to shine brightly.
	Next week, the teeth of the Russian devils will gnash ever harder, and their rabid mouths will foam in uncontrollable frenzy as the world will see a favorite Kremlin propagandist pay for their crimes.
	And this puppet of Putin is only the first.
	Russia's war criminal propagandists will all be hunted down, and justice will be served as we in Ukraine are led on this mission by faith in God, liberty, and complete liberation.
	Slavukreni.
	He didn't say it at the end.
	No, I know.
	It's usually the cell phone video, but that's why it's like you got to wait till the very end.
	The last two seconds you get it.
	Slavukreni.
	Hey, Xi Jinping invade us.
	Yeah.
	Let's start from scratch.
	We're done with this.
	We're the bad guys.
	We're the baddies.
	We're the bad guys.
	We are the baddies.
	We're locking up our own patriotic citizens.
	And I don't know if I haven't been laid in a long time, but those last two pictures, it looked kind of hot.
	Well, his hair is always perfect.
	I just want to like troll so bad, but I don't want the onslaught of like Ukrainian sheep to like jump on me on Twitter.
	But I was going to be like, man, your hair is so perfect.
	Look, I got shot on my hand.
	Take your guy, you can take it.
	Alright, this is a good segway to the Ligabitikoo.
	What was that?
	This is a good segway to the LigabitikooQ.
	Oh, the LigabitikooQ.
	Why are you gay?
	I felt ugly.
	I felt gay.
	And then we fell in love.
	And then they eat their poop poop.
	And we have a very good relationship.
	I don't like the bartender.
	You don't want to see a close-up picture of my anus because you hate gay men!
	You are gay.
	Hold the phone alert!
	Um, look guys, if you're out there and you're gay and you want to be with some, don't, don't ask the person that you're with if they have AIDS.
	That's insulting.
	It's rude.
	And it's, you're being a dick about getting dick.
	It's the ultimate ick.
	Okay.
	So we've started a new campaign called Don't Be a Dick About Getting a Dick.
	I'm not joking, by the way.
	Actually, I'm doing both.
	I'm telling you the truth and I'm joking.
	This is real.
	There's a campaign to push guys to not ask about HIV.
	Like this is why we always say you need the patriarchy.
	Like, you're safer under our rule than your own rule.
	You're gonna die on your own.
	All I'm focused on is the fact that this is a very cis-normative, don't be a dick getting dick.
	Only about a third of our LGBT brothers and sisters like dick.
	Okay?
	So cis-normative.
	I love dick.
	You love dick.
	We all love dickity dick dick dick.
	So true.
	But asking how you clean can be pretty mean.
	Now you're just being a dick dick dick.
	Eat a dick.
	Ride a dick.
	Just don't be a dick getting dick.
	This is peak.
	We have reached peak lunacy.
	Can you get those dicks out of my face, please?
	Where is this?
	You cannot ask about HIV because it is mean.
	I mean, I don't know what to say to you.
	I'd call you gay, but you'd probably call yourself gay.
	But where is this campaign rooted?
	Not that it matters, right?
	Like, remember when I was a kid and the AIDS hysteria was at its peak, they said, um, when you have sex with someone, you're having sex with everyone they ever had sex with.
	Now it's just like, yeah, so?
	Do it.
	Here, go back to that original article.
	I want to know where these people are from.
	I'm kind of hoping it's like Turkish and it's been translated into English, but no, I think it's a, well, that guy talking had an American accent, right?
	Yeah, maybe from Sweden or some shit.
	But this is all in English.
	Yeah.
	I should have looked this up.
	They're like the best English speakers, though.
	Like, when they learn English, you're like, wait, what?
	It's better than mine.
	You're Nordic or whatever?
	Oh, look, even Maoris have AIDS.
	To sum up, stop putting clean in your grinder bio and stop asking potential hookups if they're clean.
	Everyone needs to know about you equals you.
	Having conversation about HIV and STD status is not the problem.
	It's how we're doing it.
	Condoms, PrEP, regular testing, and you equal you, I don't know what that means, are how you'll stop transmission.
	Not through stigma and discrimination.
	Guys, step aside, please.
	Just step aside and let us run the show because everyone lives longer that way.
	We're talking about doomsday scenarios with the Marxists in control.
	Is that what you want?
	Whoa, that was a LL Cool J face he just had.
	Or was that you?
	No.
	Ryan?
	Ryan, shut up.
	You don't have a dad.
	I guess, let's just take a look at your mailbag.
	Not that I'm... want to see... Ryan, shut up.
	You don't have a dad.
	Let's turn our eyes to Gavin's mailbag.
	Let me touch it.
	Alright, this is a pretty good one.
	We're only doing one letter.
	Retarded quote-unquote them judge lets this guy walk free with no bail requirement.
	A non-binary shitbag judge in a very liberal district of Pittsburgh let a guy walk without any bail requirement until trial after being arrested with 1.6 million dollars of fentanyl.
	Enough to kill everyone in Allenge County three times over, or a more convenient way to think of it is 35% of Pennsylvania.
	So literally a weapon of mass destruction.
	This guy was already out on bond from New York due to sexual assault and grand larceny when this happened.
	The judge openly admits to being a socialist and ran on a platform of criminal justice reform.
	His IG page is a collection of pics of him wearing a mask like a F-A-G word and marrying a bunch of homos.
	Pre-trial panel recommended the guy be held without bond, but Faggy McFaggetstein decided to throw that out the window.
	He later stated that he thought the suspect would be placed on electronic monitoring without understanding that his decision would result in no such electronic monitoring due to the fact that that's not part of the process.
	He doesn't even know his own court procedures and what can and can't be done.
	Look at this guy's face.
	At the Greyhound bus station in downtown, but then within hours a judge let him out of jail with no bail required.
	He was due back in court today, but never showed up.
	Channel 11's Gabriella Jaluka breaks down the harsh words for the judge who let this guy go.
	This is not what we signed up for.
	This is not a judicial officer or not what a judicial officer should do.
	Aren't you embarrassed?
	- Virginia County District Attorney Steven Zappala has harsh criticism for District Judge Xander Ornstein. - Aren't you in bounds? - Ornstein let Giancarlo Picardo Cepeda out of custody after the AG's office arrested him with nearly $2 million worth of fentanyl at the bus station downtown.
	Pre-trial services recommended - Xander Ornstein. - Pieda remained in custody, but Ornstein instead decided that the suspect wouldn't have to pay a dime for his, oh okay.
	They're just loser nerds now.
	- I'm trans. - Today, Picardo Cepeda-- - They're just loser nerds now. - Did not show up to court, so another judge issued an arrest warrant.
	- That much fentanyl and how many people whose lives are adversely affected by it, that's a no-brainer.
	- In court today, we learned Picardo Cepeda was already out on bond in New York because he has two other cases pending there for grand larceny and sexual assault.
	Beheaded by clowns.
	Genocided by clowns if we're talking about 35% of Pennsylvania.
	In May, we reported that the district judge let a man out of custody after that suspect was accused of claiming to have a bomb in his luggage, forcing an American Airlines flight to be grounded at Pittsburgh International.
	Gabriella DeLuca, Channel 11 News.
	You son of a bitch!
	Alright, let's get to the final video.
	I gotta catch this train.
	Okay Ryan, I don't know if you've seen this one yet.
	You've got a good eye for fake vids.
	Tell me what you think.
	Is this real?
	Oh.
	Okay.
	Is this Israel?
	Make it nice and big.
	Wait, bigger, bigger.
	Hey buddy, okay.
	Make me a tiny guy and make it a big, big guy.
	big guy crazy big guy Mustang versus RV no and I can tell you how they did it um with That's a stable image, right?
	Oh, I see a line there.
	Yeah, and then they do a blend thing.
	They should have feathered it a little more.
	But, clever trick.
	Clever girl.
	See if you can see the... This is why you need young people working for you.
	I just went, oh no, he's dead!
	I mean, it's possible, but from what I saw... What a fun life that guy has.
	You get to trash a Mustang and an RV.
	Yeah, that is kind of cool.
	And it doesn't look like it's in that bad a condition, so it's a fairly okay RV.
	And the Mustang, well, it's got enough juice in it to fly through the air.
	Nice deal.
	All right, folks.
	And you have Premiere Pro to edit that together.
	Great life.
	I'll see you Monday.
	We really need to sell tickets for Nashville and Dallas.
	They're not selling well.
	They could be total flops.
	We're going to sing karaoke together.
	I thought you would have liked to do that, but I guess not.
	Have a great weekend.
	Enjoy yourselves.
	Get fired.
	Get in trouble.
	Be brave.
	And never stop fighting.

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