| Time | Text |
|---|---|
|
Team Combat League
00:04:54
|
|
| And we are live. | |
| Hi guys. | |
| So we're li oh my god. | |
| Hold on. | |
| Ooh. | |
| So, oh, dude, these mics stink. | |
| You just farted into it. | |
| Wash the mics. | |
| You just farted into the mic. | |
| Put them in the dishwasher every week. | |
| We don't have a dishwasher. | |
| You're missing on the action. | |
| Maddie's here puking his guts out. | |
| He took opioids because he had his teeth pulled out. | |
| He's not done? | |
| Maddie, you good? | |
| Can you see him there? | |
| No. | |
| I could hear him. | |
| Do you want me to point the camera over there? | |
| No, no. | |
| Let him have his privacy. | |
| No, not privacy. | |
| Privacy bad. | |
| Here, I got a video of him, Ryan. | |
| I'm a privacy man. | |
| Barfing's not private. | |
| It's funny. | |
| I need a little time to myself for some private barfing. | |
| Seems like that was it, though. | |
| I'm a lady. | |
| I don't like people seeing me barf. | |
| I'm not sure this morning. | |
| Because I can't, I got all my fucking stitches on the bottom of my... | |
| It looks like you had some lemon Gatorade and about seven pieces of corn. | |
| Do you want me to order a slice of pizza for you or something? | |
| Yeah. | |
| Do you want some warm porridge with vodka on it? | |
| That doesn't sound nice. | |
| Do you want me to put warm melted butter on my dad's ass crack and you can shoo the flies away and then lick it? | |
| What were we talking about before, the mice? | |
| Yeah. | |
| Do you want to dip some shaved mice into sauce while they're still alive? | |
| Three squeaks. | |
| Three squeaks. | |
| In China, folks at home, they'll have baby mice and they'll dip them in the sauce. | |
| No, they'll grab them. | |
| That's one squeak. | |
| They'll dip them in the sauce. | |
| That's two squeaks. | |
| Then they'll bite into them. | |
| That's three squeaks. | |
| It's called three squeaks. | |
| Hey, John and John, and we should have worked this out, Ryan, rather than you playing on your fucking phone. | |
| Can I switch the camera to John? | |
| John 2, can you move closer to John 1? | |
| Yeah. | |
| And then John 1, can you move over to your left? | |
| How about Matty sitting right next to you guys? | |
| No, Maddie's puking every time. | |
| And then John 1, can you hide the mic? | |
| The mic you're not using? | |
| yeah These are the kind of things we work out before the show starts. | |
| So the reason we're early this week is because something I mentioned the other day where it's called Team Combat League, I believe. | |
| And they're trying to get Zoomers and millennials interested in boxing. | |
| So it's sort of like the pitch clock where you come out swinging. | |
| You have one round and one round only. | |
| And there's a team, I think, of 10 New Yorkers. | |
| There's a team of around 10 Los Angelesers. | |
| It started. | |
| It already started. | |
| Well, that sucks. | |
| These are highlights from other fights. | |
| Yeah, this isn't live right now. | |
| Okay, so turn it up. | |
| What do you mean? | |
| Are you showing previous footage? | |
| No, this is a live broadcast, but right now this is all the It was. | |
| As soon as it started, I clicked over to it. | |
| Okay. | |
| I'll lick your armpits. | |
| I'll fist your animals. | |
| Turn it up. | |
| Turn it up. | |
| So this is just silence? | |
| It's called quiet boxing. | |
| It looks like the audio fucking floor is alongside of mere titanium. | |
| That can't be the right audio. | |
| That's the audio. | |
| Sounds like someone's playing it on their orange. | |
| Sounds like somebody put a speakerphone in that phone and then we got a doubleheader here tonight, but New York City, they are on a roll. | |
| Oh, come on. | |
| Now I'm trying to find on my phone to prove you wrong, Ryan. | |
| If this comes out of my phone sharp, your whole family's dead. | |
| But I don't know why it would do that, but I'll bite your toes. | |
| Hey, Iron Mike. | |
| How you doing, John? | |
| How are you? | |
| Okay, here we go. | |
| Team Combat League week two. | |
| I'll f in your and then I'll eat you with my balls. | |
| All right, so Ryan, this is what the link should be showing you. | |
| That sounds like shit to me. | |
| No, but it shouldn't be these guys. | |
| Is that the link? | |
| Team Combat League. | |
| Team Combat League week two, it should say. | |
| What are you doing, dude? | |
| Please! | |
| This is week three. | |
| What? | |
| This is week three. | |
| This is week three? | |
| Yes. | |
| Are you sure? | |
| Yeah. | |
| No, you're never sure about anything. | |