| Time | Text |
|---|---|
|
Why We Wear Suits On Air
00:05:19
|
|
| It's the front bottoms from New Jersey, Twin Size Mattress. | |
| About breaking up, I guess. | |
| Sad little song. | |
| I feel like if when you were younger, Ryan, if you were 20, you'd be totally ripping off this band. | |
| No, I don't like this type of stuff. | |
| That existed when I was like a music man. | |
| Well, this band's from 2007 originally, I believe. | |
| Yep, that style has been around. | |
| Welcome back to Get Off My Lawn Live on censored TV. | |
| Maddie O is not here. | |
| Again, he's still away on vacación. | |
| But as you know, this is the show that is free to the public. | |
| We do a free show here for the first, I always say half hour. | |
| It ends up being an hour because I want to talk about stuff and catch everyone up. | |
| And then we do some calls. | |
| We take some letters. | |
| There's a super chat. | |
| This is sort of where we get to know the baby monsters. | |
| We get to know the public. | |
| We get to know what you guys had a problem with this week and what was factually incorrect or what you disagree with. | |
| We get to know the audience. | |
| And I think that's the very important part of anyone doing business. | |
| And getting good at it. | |
| And getting good at it, if you will. | |
| Today's episode is brought to you by Nita Fashions. | |
| I usually wear a suit on the show. | |
| I wear a t-shirt on the live show because I'm promoting our various t-shirts. | |
| You can go to censoring.tv and pick up these shirts. | |
| But before we get to that, self-plug, check out Nita Fashions. | |
| They can set you up. | |
| All the suits, well, not all, but 99% of the suits you see me wear on the show are from Nita Fashions. | |
| Custom-made. | |
| They're measured to a T. I love this place. | |
| And when you go there, they go to all these different hotel rooms around the world. | |
| They'll come to your town at some point, although you can do it online too. | |
| And you get measured up and you're in seam and all that stuff, and you go and check fabrics. | |
| It's a male equivalent to a spa. | |
| I don't like spas. | |
| Damn! | |
| I don't want anyone touching my toes. | |
| I don't like being in hot water. | |
| I hate being massaged. | |
| This is what a massage feels like to me. | |
| Hey, hey, hey, hey. | |
| It's annoying. | |
| I come from really, really hard. | |
| But Nita Fashions, you go there and you discuss what the pockets will be like and what buttons, mother of pearl buttons and all this. | |
| And the great thing about this place, too, is it's in Hong Kong and they ship it to you after you get it all measured up. | |
| It's never happened in the States. | |
| The range is amazing. | |
| Get a shirt for 50 bucks, get a shirt for 500 bucks. | |
| Get a suit for 800 bucks, get a suit for 5,000 bucks. | |
| Everyone should have one suit, too, don't you think? | |
| Even if you're a welder, you're going to go to weddings, you're going to go to funerals. | |
| Look at the cool linings you can choose. | |
| You choose that, too. | |
| And you feel like you've been pampered. | |
| When you go there and you get all fitted, it's the male equivalent of being pampered. | |
| My head is touching the top here, Ryan. | |
| So we'd like to thank Nita Fashions for being with us since day one. | |
| What's the URL there, Ryan? | |
| NitaFashions.com. | |
| Once again, that is NitaFashions. | |
| No URL. | |
| Nita.com. | |
| That is the URL. | |
| No, I meant no hyphen, no underscore. | |
| Oh, no, no, no. | |
| And what's the, for some reason, maybe I'm an old guy, but most of our people seem to like to go there via Instagram. | |
| Their Instagram is nita.fashions. | |
| Again, that is nita.fashions. | |
| So DM them there, set it up. | |
| Please make sure you mention that you're coming from Censored TV because they give me amazing deals on outfits, which is why I'm always looking so fantastic. | |
| It's ironic that I'm advertising them here with a t-shirt on when I'm usually wearing it. | |
| And you know what else is cool, by the way? | |
| When you get your suit, it says your name on the inside. | |
| I have this fantasy of my sons. | |
| One of the things that helps them get over my death is that they'll have the suits and they can wear them and my Rolex. | |
| But they probably won't want either. | |
| Don't live for your kids. | |
| I wrote all these notes in the books I read, hoping they would read them one day. | |
| But they don't do that. | |
| They're not interested in the books. | |
| You wonder what your legacy will be with your children. | |
| Anyway, that's neither here nor there. | |
| Neither fashions. | |
| Thank you for sponsoring the show. | |
| All right, let's get started with the show. | |
| Before we take calls, and we'll put the number on the screen there to take calls, I want to talk about... | |
| Sex. | |
| Yeah, I want to talk about sex. | |
| Sex is like a tickle. | |
| No, I think someone's lurking on the doorway. | |
| Wish I check it out? | |
| Normally we'd have Maddie to handle this. | |
| Can you go answer it? | |
| It's going to obviously distract me. | |
| Might be someone. | |
| I invited a couple people to watch the show. | |
| Sorry about this, folks. | |
| This does not make for very good entertainment. | |
| But when we hear someone at the studio this late at night here in the Bronx, it's very weird because no one knows we're here. | |
| And unless it's a buddy, then why would they? | |
| Don't let them in. | |
| Hello? | |
| We're shooting a show. | |