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June 20, 2022 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes

01:54:10

S4E131 - BABY MONSTER RANSOM EPISODE

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	And you can hear me?
	My mic is on?
	Yeah.
	Cool.
	Feels weird not having headphones.
	It's one of those things you like to monitor.
	So I got my notes here.
	Let's take this out.
	That feels cool to enter with all the music and stuff.
	I don't remember how we did it last time, but you nailed it.
	There's Hollowed in the booth with us today.
	Hollowed.
	How's it going?
	Hey, you want to show yourself real quick?
	Yeah, there we go.
	Nice.
	Cool.
	Hello.
	I'm Hollowed.
	You sure are.
	That's snazzy.
	I mean, you got a lot of patterns going on there.
	You look like the Joker.
	It's very Joker-y.
	He's got a bunch of patterns.
	He's like, I don't care if they clash.
	I believe in society.
	Because, you know, jeans are communist, so you got to just dress dapper.
	And as long as it's aesthetically formal, any color works if you can rock it.
	Yeah, there's an America First guy.
	He's like a Sartour.
	And he was a cool dude we met at ATHPAC.
	And he's about being brave with patterns and stuff like that.
	And I play it safe.
	This is as wacky as I'll go.
	You know, like have a color on my pocket square that isn't matching my tie or whatever.
	But yeah, I just don't want to look like I'm breaking any official rules.
	So I used to do like a double Windsor and then Milo.
	And I think Anne Gavin told me that it looks like you're a black real estate agent or something.
	It's like too symmetrical.
	So ever since then, I kind of, you know, tried to slim down that knot.
	You know what I...
	You know what I tried to do?
	He's a quick learner.
	What I tried to do is do the Brian Stelter knot where it's just like a chod and it doesn't even taper off at all.
	It's like hard to do a tie that bad and shitty.
	But let's see here.
	I'm going to do a quick recap over the over the weekend, but before I do, me and Hollowed, well, really, it's just Hollowed and I play bass in the band.
	Am I in the band officially now?
	Yeah.
	You're the bass player.
	That's so cool.
	Yeah, I get to just hop along on all the hard work that he's done.
	But he's kind of like Trent Rezner from Nine Inch Nails.
	Like, he does all the music himself and then has to hire miscreants like me, my buddy Dan.
	Tampala also is all solo.
	Tam Impala?
	I'm pretty sure his most recent album even mastered it himself.
	Whoa.
	He does everything.
	So the drummer and the keyboard player that we have, those are guys that I've known from the Hudson Valley for years.
	And it's cool to be in a project with them because honestly, he's always been the drummer.
	Dan has always been like a friend of my friend.
	And now we're working together.
	And, you know, after we played FedFest, we were kind of just eating seven burgers each of White Castle, drunk after the show.
	Shout out to Troy.
	Troy gave us a ride in his van.
	It was a really fun time.
	I wish I could really get into more detail about it.
	It was more fun than, in some ways, than Doomerfest because it was just like a Bronx rooftop show.
	The fucking scenery was awesome.
	There was a couple of speeches there that were super duper spicy, like, whoa, like about race and things.
	So it was a lot of fun.
	But we have some footage of the rooftop view.
	If you go to link 16,030 under rooftop view, you can get a peek of what the vibes were there.
	And a couple of other, like another band, the Free Jays, they played, I've known the lead singer and guitarist for that band for fucking years, since high school.
	And nobody was interested in, like, playing music, so I started playing some old throwback jams on the connecting it to the speakers and providing some music.
	Because it was a party really with no music besides the live music.
	So when there were no bands on, I took the opportunity to DJ it a little bit.
	Anyway, so there was some drams.
	There's always drama with these events.
	Like with Doomerfest, there was the girl Bryn.
	She got punched in the face.
	Well, that drama carried on to FedFest.
	She decided she didn't like a certain group of people from Doomerfest, and they wanted to show up.
	They were in town.
	They had driven from who knows where.
	And Bryn expressed her unhappiness with the fact that they were going to show up.
	But they wound up showing up anyway.
	And they were really supportive over it.
	If you could check out the video there, I don't know if you could see.
	It's just one of the videos we have on the laptop.
	And for when Dan needs a hand, I have my laptop here that I can remotely pull up stuff.
	But here we are.
	Nice.
	So all the people you see dancing up front there are all the people she doesn't like.
	It was so funny, you know?
	But it's funny because she wanted to do two more songs that would have extended past her allotted set, right?
	And we have our mind on the fact that we have to fucking stop playing at a certain time.
	It's New York City, there's noise laws or whatever, noise ordinance laws.
	So, Dan is up there, our drummer, and uh, he's getting ready to set up, and then she's like, oh, I need two more songs.
	So then Hollowed hears that, and he goes up, and he's like, just do one more song.
	Like, we're already over time here.
	And she was upset.
	She was upset.
	And she kind of turned on Dan for a second.
	She apologized afterwards and Hollowed.
	She was mad at you too, right?
	Yeah.
	Yeah, because the guy comes up to me and says, she's going over, so you're going to have to cut your set in half.
	And I'm like, I arranged all this.
	I brought all that gear, all that gear you see.
	Yeah, we lifted that up five flights of stairs.
	Yeah.
	So, fun time.
	But we are playing another show the 28th at the Brew House.
	That's right.
	Right after live, or the Orlando show, the Tuesday right after that, on Long Island.
	Yeah, and Ryan's also playing as well, Nopiap.
	A Nopiup set.
	So I did a set there.
	The acoustic, I just did two songs because the sound really wasn't, I wasn't hearing myself so well, so I'm not sure what the audience was hearing.
	But I did two instrumental Nope tracks, and they ruled.
	I think that was a great time.
	But back to the Bryn thing, what's funny is she kind of turned on you, made a new enemy out of you temporarily.
	And then the guys that she hated were like, let her play two more songs.
	So the guys she hated stood up for her, and then I think she wound up squashing that beef.
	So it was, you know, women don't really know what they want.
	They say, I hate that person, and then they dance for your set, and they rally for you to play your two songs.
	And now you've made all your friends back, and then made a temporary enemy out of Hollowed.
	But it all resolved and went really well after that.
	Fun night.
	Really fun night.
	So let's move on.
	I am gay.
	I gay.
	Nice job.
	So it was just Juneteenth in DC.
	Let's just recap over some of the things.
	We're going to get to all of your favorite segments.
	We're going to hit racism.
	We're going to hit Biden.
	We're not going to hit Biden.
	Excuse me.
	That's a threat.
	It's not a threat.
	Nah, he hits himself with the bicycle.
	Yeah, he...
	The earth hit me, man.
	We're going to go over a whole bunch of really cool stuff.
	So, before we do that, let's just hit on this past weekend, Juneteenth.
	Rest in peace or whatever.
	You want to hit that link there?
	Yep.
	Cool.
	You want a full screen?
	No, you don't have to.
	So what you're seeing there is a response, people running and stuff because there was a shooting.
	I think there's a news spot about it, that next link.
	And, you know, that's just how they celebrate.
	Breaking news overnight.
	The teen is dead, another three people injured, including a police officer, after a shooting in our nation's capital in Washington, D.C. That incident, it actually took place near a concert celebrating the Juneteenth holiday yesterday.
	We have Gio Insignares in the newsroom this morning with more details on this, Gio.
	Well, Jason, Eric, right now, what we know so far is that this was in Washington, D.C. You see the response there right now, or rather, this happened over the weekend.
	A teen dead, three others injured, including a police officer.
	Now, according to officials in the area, this was an un So that's how they celebrate.
	I mean, they didn't have any lofty ideas about an election being stolen or anything.
	That's just how they party.
	Just to recap, on January 6th, 2021, a thing happened where people were upset.
	They were upset at the travesty.
	The travesty.
	They walked into, they had an unguided tour of the Capitol.
	They opened a £20,000 door that could only be opened from the inside.
	That's also true.
	So there were literally no guns.
	The fact that there are people running around in a celebratory manner, shooting guns, and then, could you imagine if there was any fucking armed people in the building?
	Like, it would almost warrant the amount of hearings and bullshit that we're hearing and the fact that it was a tragedy, like 9-11.
	It would almost warrant that.
	If there were guns, not even shot off, just like inside.
	Like, there was guys with guns.
	Okay.
	Now we're talking about fine that looks insurrection-y.
	But there were like flagpoles and shit.
	It was the most not hardcore thing ever.
	So, but...
	Wow, nothing wrong with that.
	Nothing wrong with that.
	Guy Fieri even says it.
	But, you know, we have to respect other cultures.
	Juneteenth is a big celebration.
	This is how they get down.
	And by the way, the city did not set up any fireworks display or anything.
	So people have to make do and, you know, have some firecrackers of their own.
	So really, it's fine what's happening there.
	I just wish it was fair across the board.
	Let's hit on Ukraine, right?
	So the next link there.
	I don't know what the hell is going on.
	Somebody tagged me in a video, a guy that looked like me, some Asian, next to a guy who was hit by a bullet or something, but they were English.
	I don't know if they're English soldier, I mean American soldiers out there.
	I think that guy looks American.
	I don't know.
	That guy looks, you know, Ukrainian.
	You can kind of tell.
	So they're driving, and if you skip to about 30 seconds past that point, yeah, there.
	They, like, fly off a bridge, which is fucking crazy.
	And, you know, like, my heart goes out to anybody who is hurt or dies.
	But I don't care.
	It's hard to care.
	It's just, I don't, I don't know.
	They fly off a bridge.
	It sucks.
	Terrible, but get off your phone.
	I know that's not the driver.
	The driver's not texting and driving, but you're in a war, sir.
	I know it's bad when you're at like a dinner.
	And you know, Gavin says I have no dad, but really, when I go visit my dad and we're having a dinner, he's very dad-like.
	He's like, No, you have to get off phone because we have to get together, talk to each other.
	Get off your phone and be in a war with your buddies, dude.
	What's pretty crazy is all those Reddit Foreign Legion people.
	Can they hear you?
	Can they?
	Yeah, is my mic.
	Is your mic in front of you?
	Oh.
	Have they not heard you this entire time?
	Well, I hear myself.
	Can you not hear me?
	Not really.
	Is that better?
	Really bring it up to their mouth.
	How do I move it?
	Just extend that thing.
	Oh, there we go.
	Yeah, so on Reddit, there were all these people boasting about how they want to serve for Ukraine and saying, you know, I heard there's no vaccine requirements.
	So they would go and then they posted their location and basically just got themselves annihilated because they would post their location on Reddit and the Russian army would just be like, oh, thank you.
	It's just absurd because it's pride.
	People have this pride and pride is a big sin for a reason because you're so prideful about the good thing you're doing, you forget that it's not all about you.
	Right.
	And now you just killed a bunch of innocent people because of idiocracy.
	Virtue signaling and real things like war don't really mesh with each other.
	So we touched on the things everybody's talking about.
	Ukraine, Juneteenth, blah, blah, blah.
	But I have a little, you know, let's get back to fun.
	I didn't even get over my weekend yet.
	So after we filmed another Maddie's shitty little kitchen, we decided to try some bone marrow.
	Here's some behind-the-scenes footage that really you would not be able to see anywhere else.
	Hoop away.
	This is after the show.
	Yeah.
	This is us R ⁇ D and research development.
	Sure.
	Bone marrow, baby.
	Woo!
	Yums.
	Get in there.
	Liverpig totally promotes eating both of them.
	It's part of the primal tenants.
	Poop is very good.
	It looks gamey and like it looks like a fear factor challenge.
	Yeah.
	Hold on.
	Do we have toasted points?
	I don't have them.
	Not right away.
	This was kind of impromptu.
	Oh boy.
	Here.
	Let's do this.
	That is Butter of the Gods.
	Good stuff.
	Yeah, I heard, what's his name?
	Weck is going to fight Liver King.
	Happy Punch promo.
	It seems like Liver King has finally reacted to Weckingball.
	So Wecking Ball has had his followers kind of just tag Wecking Ball in Liver King's stuff because he will not acknowledge him.
	It could be out of fear.
	I think it's fear because Liver King's, he's, you know, the celebrity mailbag two weeks ago is Liver King, if you're wondering who he is.
	He's an online, you know, social media influencer guy who eats bone marrow, raw liver, blah, blah, blah.
	He's not natural.
	He definitely does steroids, but he lies about it.
	I understand he's probably got his reasons for that.
	But his origin story is he was a bullied young man.
	He claims.
	Now he's a liar, so we don't know if this is true, but it's just young little Brian Johnson in school.
	His dead name, Brian Johnson.
	There were people stuffing him into lockers, spitting on their hand and slapping him in the face.
	He got his shoes stolen, so he had to walk home barefoot.
	These are all what created the monster Liver King that we see today.
	I don't know if I believe it, but if that is true, then I think Weckingball is really tapping into his like, you know, his abused origin story where he's like, I'm being bullied again.
	I got this big so that way no one would ever do this, but now they're back.
	It was kind of like if a grape did a bunch of trend and then took ayahuasca and is now on.
	Yeah, I don't know if he's ayahuasca level.
	I did see him wearing a USS Reagan hat.
	So he could be red-pilled.
	I mean, he's in San Antonio.
	So the fucked up thing is, if you just stopped lying, we would think you're awesome.
	Maybe not awesome.
	But we would be like, we'd listen to you a little more.
	But how are we supposed to trust you if you're not honest about your fact that it's not just hard work?
	It's a lot of trend.
	You do work very hard.
	You do lift very hard, but it's a lot of trend.
	Or whatever sorts of steroids, frankly.
	So last night, link 16,031.
	Gavin was on Chrissy Mayer's podcast last night.
	And you can just play this without any volume, just B-roll.
	It's that link there.
	And it's, you know, I was enjoying his appearance on there.
	You know, I see a lot of Gavin, obviously.
	If you go to like the midway point, like about midway through.
	There you go.
	Just B-roll.
	He's there with Ashton, Chrissy Mayer, and some other ladies there.
	Fucking, it's a different side of Gav.
	He's at Gav's Tav.
	He's sauced up.
	You know, he does this show sauced up too, but really, this is like kind of a fun side of Gavin where he's really mellow and just speaking from the heart, a little more vulnerable than usual.
	And I think it's a good...
	I was really enjoying it.
	Yet again, I see tons of hours of Gavin all the time.
	But it felt like really a refreshing look, you know, into Gavmeister.
	And it also shows a side of him that not a lot of people have seen.
	And a lot of people feel bad for me.
	They think I'm bullied or mistreated here.
	I don't think that's the case.
	I've worked in professional environments where somebody has a vision, as Gavin does.
	And when things don't go according to plan, you get a little angry.
	And it's not that he hates you or anything.
	It's just you fucked up and now you've thrown him off, right?
	So I had a little bit of that today.
	Hollowed was a little late.
	That's fine.
	But it's okay.
	You know, because here's the thing about your chi.
	He talks about this a lot.
	You have a certain amount of chi.
	When you are ready to Do a show and it gets delayed, you're like, it's almost like fucking.
	It's like you're not that you're not in the mood, but you have to like, you know, start playing with yourself to get back in.
	Like, yeah.
	So I chug some water and stuff.
	And it's not your fault.
	I'm glad that you're here.
	You got to tell that story about the guy at the gym that got mad at you for opening the door.
	I'm not going to delay that guy.
	It's a guy that looks like Will.
	It's a guy that looks like WillIM.
	And he was like being a dick.
	He was like trying to be a dick, but he doesn't know how to because he's like autistic.
	He's like a weea-boo black guy.
	He's like an anime nerd black guy.
	It was just weird, dude.
	And I just, I'm not even going to get into it.
	But just to get into nice Gavin, drunk Gavin.
	Some people are mean drunks.
	Gavin is a chronically nice drunk.
	He's fun, and oftentimes he'll inflict damage on himself before he even thinks about getting wily with anybody else.
	Besides that one fight we had at his house with that guy.
	He one time, I dropped him home, and as he's getting out, he just looks at me in the eyes.
	He's like, what are you going to do about this?
	And he puts his arm in between the door and then just slams his arm in the door.
	He just slams his own arm in the door.
	And the next day, it's like, Bruce, you're like, what happened to my arm last night?
	I was like, you literally slammed into my door.
	With respect to Mr. McGinnis, because the law is different with respect to him.
	Literally a perfect drop.
	Wow.
	Dan is good.
	He's making my job look easy.
	We have some bumpers and transitions coming up that might be challenging, so we'll see.
	But so far he's doing great.
	He gave me a bike.
	He gifted me a bike when I first moved out of my house living in this new town without a car and bought me a bike, took me skiing twice with his family, had a great time.
	So, you know, if you see him bullying me, it's probably deserved and warranted.
	It's not even bullying.
	It's just, you know, he takes this stuff seriously.
	One time he woke up, he was very, very drunk, passed out downstairs, and I get a call and there's like a situation unfolding.
	Pretty serious one.
	And nothing like illegal or bad, just, you know, just personal matters with a friend of ours.
	And they needed some help.
	They needed us to get in the car and pick him up or whatever.
	And he goes with me because he knows the guy I drive because I'm not drunk.
	And so I wake him up and I'm like, hey, dude, bad news.
	Fucking blah, blah, blah, blah.
	We got to go get him.
	And he's just like, okay.
	And just wakes up.
	Usually if you throw anything out of Gavin's bandwidth, if I come up and I'm like, hey, what about this thumbnail?
	He's like, I don't have the bandwidth for it.
	Fucking, give me, what's the who, what, when, where, now?
	Like, give me the information.
	Let's figure this the fuck out.
	It was such a serious situation.
	He was bombed and you would think that he would wake up and be like, what's happening with who and fucking where, why, and pissed.
	But he just got up and handled the fucking shit.
	Just go, all right.
	At his heart, at his core, very sweet, caring man.
	So no more sympathy from me, please.
	I'm a grown man.
	I'm wearing a suit.
	Exactly.
	So happy Father's Day to him.
	Happy, not my father, but father figure's day to Gavin.
	Last night, another thing that I saw, this is just from the weekend here, Owen Benjamin was on Jim Brewer's podcast.
	You don't really have to show, we don't have to show footage of that.
	But it kind of seems like, on first glance, I'm like, Owen Benjamin is now not getting more mainstream, but getting more accepted.
	And maybe things are kind of looking up for him to exist in some sort of entertainment capacity again.
	But really what's happening is Jim Brewer is getting more, you know, like separated from the mainstream.
	But he's ascending, in my eyes, it's not a fall from grace, because he comes from Hollywood or rather comes from this, you know, totally liberalized industry of comedy.
	He's actually, he's upping his ranks.
	Owen is like staying the same.
	He's not getting more mainstream.
	Brewer is getting more to our level of being tolerant, being open to hearing shit that people.
	Ain't nobody got time for that.
	Nobody got time for it.
	So it's funny.
	I just think it's the complete opposite of my first gut instinct, which is Owen's getting more popular.
	No.
	Brewer is getting more popular.
	Wasn't Brewer the Mets guy?
	He was like, Mets in 2015, they're going to win the World Series.
	Yeah, La Familigia.
	Or whatever the hell he said.
	No, that's my word.
	Can't use it, Brewer.
	You don't have a vowel in your last name.
	True.
	At the end of your last name.
	That is very Italian.
	Ew.
	So my week, let me get into my weekend real quick.
	I had a great pre-Father's Day on Saturday.
	We went to go visit my grandparents.
	There's a picture of my grandfather and Daphne up there, too, that you could show.
	This is a great guy.
	I mean, really, Father's Day, it feels like it's a no-brainer for him to be the one who I honor and thank for being a great father figure, great head of the household there.
	He's just been the man of the house that I've grown up in all my life.
	He's always taught me how to work hard.
	A couple of the jobs that I've had were due to him.
	Ambulette job, the greenhouse job, the Renaissance fair.
	So he, you know, he showed me how to work hard, showed me how to mow the lawn.
	He taught me how to, what's it called?
	Just, you know, try to be a little more financially responsible and be fun.
	He's a fun guy, and how to golf.
	That was cool.
	He told me how to golf.
	From a young age, he's like, we're golfing.
	Every meet that I had to go to with Jare OTC to go drill meet, he was a Vietnam veteran.
	He is a Vietnam veteran.
	So he really respected that.
	So we would go 6 o'clock in the Morning to do drill, and he would have no problem drive me around.
	He drove me to all my jobs, no matter how far away they were.
	One time I was working in Warwick, super fucking far away from where we live, like 30 minutes for you know, to drive 30 minutes when you don't have to go anywhere in the morning.
	You know, he never complained.
	He was just so supportive.
	That picture you wanted me to show.
	Oh, that's in the slideshow there.
	So he's just having a great time with my daughter, and it's just awesome to see him light up and have a great time there.
	I know this is kind of just life stuff, but I feel like that's really important.
	When you're ingesting a bunch of news politics and the stuff, it just keeps going on.
	It never stops.
	It's always unfair.
	It's always just like 10% good news, 90% we're getting fucked.
	I think it's important to concentrate on your family, and I've never really opened up about that sort of stuff, but it's a huge part of who I am.
	So I don't know if you, can you see it over there?
	I guess it's not super important, but we had a little lunch together, and the ladies dipped off.
	My mom went to go vape, and my wife went to go change the baby.
	And it was just me and him.
	And, you know, he was diagnosed with prostate cancer not long ago.
	And so he's always just tough and never shows it.
	But I had to ask him, I was like, how really are you doing?
	And he's like, dude, I feel great.
	You know, I love my life.
	And I'm really not bogged down by it, really.
	I'm just going to my appointments, doing what the fuck I have to do.
	He still has his hair.
	He did alternate things, not quite chemo.
	So he's doing great, and that's good to hear.
	But the one thing that he imparted on to me, he was like, I've learned from you how to be a little more calm because he was kind of a hothead back in the day.
	You've got to figure.
	He's a fucking Puerto Rican guy, grew up back in the old school dude.
	And yeah, he had a temper on him, but he quit alcohol a long time ago.
	He's been just such a mellow, wise, funny, always funny, always telling jokes guy.
	But he said to me, he was like, the one thing I'll never forget about you is we're at a family get together and he said that one of our family members were talking about how their son is a lawyer and blah, blah, blah, and they're, you know, just graduated from college or whatever.
	And he asked, he was like, what do you do, Ryan?
	And I said, oh, I'm a dishwasher.
	And I said it with like pride and confidence.
	And it was something that he really was touched by.
	So I'm trying to look on the computer there.
	Did we close it?
	There we go.
	Here, I'm going to.
	Oh.
	Not the black guy.
	There We go.
	There we go.
	There he is.
	I hope this isn't magnificently boring, but for me, it means a lot to be able to share that sort of thing.
	So, there he is, man.
	He's really a hero to me, my grandfather.
	And there's Daphne.
	She loved him.
	She had a great time.
	All right.
	Now, one more thing about the weekend.
	Here's a tangent I'm going to get into.
	And I think it's important to share.
	Oops.
	We all know, in our heart of hearts, Dungeons and Dragons is fucking gay.
	It's lame.
	It's for nerds, losers, basement dwellers, geeks, people that deserve wedgies and get them.
	But I gotta say, we did it for the lols.
	But me and my wife, when we heard my little cousin talking about his Dungeons and Dragons game, we were like, when you're married and you don't get out much, like we can't even go to the movies, you know, we don't really have a sitter yet.
	When you can't get out much and you hear, like, somebody's playing Dungeons and Dragons, we're like, we'll fucking do it.
	Like, we just Help.
	We want to do anything.
	So we had a blast playing Dungeons and Dragons.
	Let me just say, it has that stink around it.
	Obviously.
	Dungeons and Dragons is the punchline for a type of people.
	When you hear Dungeons and Dragons, you're like the worst type of loser.
	I understand.
	But just unprogram yourself for a second.
	I hate this fucking shit.
	I know.
	I know that's what you're thinking.
	But let me just show you.
	11A and 11B.
	I'm already in.
	After our first game of Dungeons Dragons, I now know the dice I want to buy.
	I bought them already, actually.
	These frosted dice with little speckles in them, that's pretty sick.
	That'll be good for my magic and my things like that.
	And then the other link there to show you the dice.
	He'll show them while I keep babbling about this.
	You know when you first start smoking pot in like maybe high school, if you're super cool like me?
	After you start smoking pot, you look around the school and you can pinpoint who else smokes pot.
	You're like, I think that guy does.
	That guy's hair has always been just like longer than everybody else's.
	I think he smokes pot.
	I can now tell who plays Dungeons Dragons or who would be open to Dungeons and Dragons.
	Or who buys Funko Pops.
	it's about the same group of people.
	Yeah, yeah.
	So it's weird, man.
	It's this whole world.
	It's been going on since obviously when it came out way back when.
	And it's had the shittiest reputation ever since.
	But I got to show you, celebrities play Dungeons and Dragons.
	Look at this.
	You could play with no audio here.
	That's Vince Vaughan.
	Who else is there?
	Tom Morello?
	Tom Morello.
	Still kind of bad.
	Yeah, there he is.
	Let me just go down the list of these people here that you would know.
	I mean, there's some people that are writers for some gay shows that we never watch.
	But Tom Morello, that's pretty bad.
	I don't want to be affiliated with anything that he likes.
	The Big Show from WWE, I think that's getting better.
	Vince Vaughan, I'm sold again.
	Two out of three guys.
	Pretty cool dudes.
	The big show, Vince Vaughan, I think they outweigh the shittiness of Tom Morello, who I've never liked as a guitarist.
	His politics are cancer.
	He thinks he's black, but he's literally Dungeons and Dragons level white.
	So now, back to bad.
	If you go to 12B, this next person who plays Dungeons and Dragons or did, kind of teeters the scale back to, we don't want to be associated with this.
	It's Stephen Colbert.
	Now, here he is talking to one of the guys who plays that celebrity game that we just showed.
	If you go to 7 minutes and 51 seconds, volume on.
	And his staffers just got arrested for breaking into the capital.
	His staffers did get arrested for January 6th.
	Oh, not January 6th, for breaking into the Capitol or something.
	Doctor decides to go be a farmer.
	And we called it death by farming.
	And then he would roll a new character.
	I love this.
	Yeah, yeah.
	All right.
	But yeah, we usually, the real way.
	He's just so not funny.
	No, but here's the thing.
	He's not funny because he's wrong and so confident about his political tilt and just makes what should be a fun show about escapism, entertainment, and comedy into a fucking...
	It's like CNN light.
	It's like CNN with jokes, quote unquote.
	They're never funny.
	It's just a waste of a perfectly good time slot and format that I've always loved fucking late night shows.
	And it's just, it's a complete abuse of the platform.
	When I was like 10 or 11, I remember watching Comedy Central South Park was on.
	And then The Daily Show came on with Jon Stewart.
	And I could tolerate it.
	Make sure we could hear you in that mic a little more.
	I would tolerate it.
	I would tolerate the daily show.
	But then when Colbert would come on, I'd just be like, oh.
	I just remember from a young kid, before I even knew his politics or anything, he just like...
	Oh, really?
	He was like that kid that thinks he's really funny, but doesn't have the charisma or the jokes.
	It's like the popular kid that everybody laughs at his jokes, but you're like, that's not funny, sir.
	You're just likable.
	When he's in that likable realm, where is it?
	I like that.
	I like when he's having fun.
	So it's honestly a little less shitty to see him enjoying something that's completely apolitical for once.
	It's such a rare look that I was kind of like, oh, cool.
	He's one of us.
	One of the dungeon masters.
	So play this with some audio.
	What's about to happen is insane.
	Let's go away.
	Okay.
	So let's roll, okay?
	We're going to see.
	Let's roll.
	Let's roll.
	Yeah.
	Okay, now if you roll a 20, pop up with one hit point, you're good.
	Okay.
	You roll one, you lose two.
	All right.
	I'm going to skip a little bit.
	We didn't expect you to roll a 20 because we're going to end the interview anyway.
	Okay, fine.
	What they're about to say blew my mind.
	Because they're telling me to wrap over there.
	And that's a successful debt save.
	Well, we've got to get together and play.
	Who do you play with out there?
	Oh, man.
	You know the big show from WWE?
	Of course.
	He just joined the group, Taryn Killam from Saturday Night Live.
	He's in my home group.
	Vin Diesel plays.
	You ever play with Vin?
	I don't know if he does.
	He says he does.
	He does, but I don't know anybody that plays with him.
	And believe me, did you hear that?
	Did you hear that?
	My house in LA is the LA hub, and all the writers, directors, comedians, actors, we all started playing again.
	I'm coming out for the Emmys.
	Maybe we could be out there.
	Vin Diesel.
	We meme him a lot on the show.
	And when I saw that clip, I was like, it just brings it all around to here.
	And I'll set this up for you because I don't think you know that it's here.
	The world got Vinned.
	He says, who the fuck said, who proudly says, I played Dungeons and Dragons?
	First of all, that's kind of something that's yet again, very lame, very nerdy.
	Why would you want to say that as well?
	As a member of the Dungeons and Dragons community.
	You have stolen D ⁇ D Valor?
	What?
	Here's the thing.
	Michelle Rodriguez, I know, plays D ⁇ D.
	So maybe he does.
	But that's so funny that Vin comes back up in there.
	So anyway, I know what you're saying.
	All these people, Tom Morello, fucking, everybody but Vince Vaughan and the big show, these are all homo nerds.
	And I don't want to play D ⁇ D.
	That's not, you're not selling me.
	But if you take a minute to look at everybody.
	I feel like I'm a toad.
	I do.
	I feel like I'm a doad.
	Everybody in the music industry sucks.
	They're all liberal and gay, besides like Ariel Pink and John Mouse or whatever the fuck.
	Everybody in the art world is overwhelmingly toxic with their social justice bullshit.
	Everybody in movies, television.
	This is another thing that we can take back and have a subversive subculture of D ⁇ D.
	And I'll tell you why.
	It's the opposite of video games.
	What Gavin hates about video games, what I think everybody could agree, the worst part about video games, besides like you're on the talk thing, talking to friends online, you have to be there for the most part in person.
	You're creating stuff out of nowhere.
	Like the dungeon master comes up with a script and shit, and you're talking to your fucking buddies.
	You could even take it to the gay level where you're like going like, my mage enters the dragon dwarf realm.
	And you can talk in language and like fucking accents and shit.
	But really what I learned, it's like problem solving stuff.
	So my cousin set out a game where we're like, there's this cabin.
	There are these two barbarians that like they get thrown outside, they're in a fight, and then we try to ask them a question.
	One of our guys has a linguistics thing.
	Actually, my wife, she was like an amorphous mist of magic, and she knows how to speak different languages.
	So she translated some shit, and I tried to get some info.
	We wound up fucking him up.
	There was a king elf there.
	We fucked him up.
	This guy in our team has a group of dwarves looking for him.
	And so we're like, there's a couple of options here.
	We found this map inside the cabin.
	So what if we dress like barbarians?
	We dress up in their armor, go fuck up the elves, and then leave a map behind.
	And then now the elves are off of our buddy's trail and they go attack.
	Now we get both of these factions to just fuck each other up.
	Or what we could do is we take this king guy to the barbarian elves and we're like, because he got this, the eye of whatever, my friend hypnotized this guy.
	So the king is just like this.
	So we bring him to the encampment and we say, guys, the fucking dwarves just beat the shit out of this guy, your king.
	We'll team up with you.
	And now we have an army to beat up these dwarves that are after our friend.
	And you know what?
	They were closing in on us.
	And by the time we even got to that plan to fix this puzzle thing to get out of there, it couldn't even happen.
	So now we had to do a different thing.
	Now we're just battling the dwarves.
	War.
	War.
	Where's the camera?
	Oh, there it is.
	Dude, I'm telling you, it's very creative, very interesting, and also very social.
	So you have video games.
	Have you ever played Risk?
	I love Risk.
	Yeah, Risk is phenomenal.
	I used to play Risk during lunch period.
	I think there's a reason why these things don't come to the...
	Lunch period?
	No, not lunch period.
	Like, board games, there's a lot of board games, and it actually challenges your mind, and they just want people playing Fortnite and jerking off.
	You become a lot more submissive and easier to manipulate.
	Don't drive a car, don't own a property, play Fortnite, watch porn.
	Right.
	There's no creativity in it.
	You're just driving your little train on the train tracks.
	With Dungeons Dragons, it's literally like your perception can be like, well, what if we do this?
	What if we do that?
	And then you have your cool ass dice and you roll to see if you can accomplish that thing.
	There's like almost no limits.
	You can be whoever you want.
	My character was John Meadows, bodybuilder, the guy who really inspired me to lift super heavy.
	And anyway, whatever.
	I was just a dude, but I'm a bard, so I play music and it's magical.
	So you can make them whoever you want.
	There was a rat guy.
	There was a fucking half dragon.
	All right, so all this stuff that we think is corny, Olympus get disturbed, nickelback.
	These are hit machines.
	These were great rock song creators.
	And we were just taught to, right before everything became trap music, we were taught to meme them and be like, look at this photograph.
	And all we're doing right there is just mocking effort.
	You know, it's mocking the effort of being, you know, expressing yourself.
	There's no vulnerability when it comes to rap.
	There's tons of concepts and messages to the human spirit that rock used to provide in a rocking envelope.
	Like the song Limelight by Rush.
	It's about the concept of getting past the fascination of the perceived fame or...
	You know what it is about?
	It's about breaking down the perception of something like Dungeons and Dragons.
	Once you get beyond all the fucking names that they call D ⁇ D players, you can get to the real relation, the underlying theme.
	Now, we're devoid of any music that speaks to humanity anymore, besides country music, and even that is going fucking hip-hop.
	So, we're doing ourselves a disservice by just letting them meme the shit that is cool.
	And I would be dubious of the reputation D ⁇ D has got.
	Because if something has a bad reputation on a grand scale, it's probably because it's good.
	Look at everybody you think is cool and based.
	Okay?
	Now, if you're interested in trying it out, email me, ryan at censored.tv subject D ⁇ D.
	And I think we're going to try to get together a Zoom D ⁇ D thing.
	Our music group that we have, me and Hollowed and a bunch of other guys, I'm going to see how many of those dudes want to give it a shot.
	And we could have a lot of fun.
	Who knows?
	We're going to give it a shot.
	It'd be more fun to play in person, too.
	It would be more fun to play in person, but you know, we'll have to make do.
	There's nothing really limiting ourselves from doing it on the compute.
	So to go back to nerdy, gay, lame, losing, check out this video here.
	You could just play it at like low volume or no volume.
	And you know what?
	I'll take over.
	If you just show that there, I'll take over the controls.
	This is the New York Renaissance Fair.
	This is a check who's at it.
	I used to work here.
	It's one of the funnest jobs I've ever had.
	One of the best civilian jobs before I became a super famous multi-millionaire producer with different faces that I use, and I could be Trump and Owen Benjamin.
	No, but it really was a super fun job.
	It was grueling, like it was hot as hell.
	I think Owen Benjamin used to do this, actually.
	I'm not sure if it was at our exact Renaissance fair, but he used to be the guy at the tomato booth, for sure.
	He said that before.
	I can't confirm if it's the same exact Renaissance Fair.
	They have fucking jousting with real horses.
	They have blacksmiths making swords.
	We're going to go this year.
	A lot of people have gone.
	You know, Brandon Buckingham, the Orange County Choppers guys, Impractical Jokers.
	It's kind of a thing that people do to get content.
	We're going to do it this year.
	Maddie's going to be like a knight.
	I'm going to be a fucking dwarf or whatever.
	Where is it?
	This is in Tuxedo or Sterling Forest, New York.
	Now, when you enter this, the gates of the Renaissance Fair, You are entering a different world.
	There's different houses and huts and atmospheres and little sub-villages.
	All the shit they sell, like food-wise, is really good and really interesting.
	You get like Middle Eastern food that's time-relevant or like, you know, time accurate to the era.
	They got those rides, that's what I used to do.
	I used to push these rides.
	That's the barrel.
	Then, you know, when I first started there, I was a breaker, so I'd give people 20-minute breaks from these rides, so I would do all of the rides and go around and give people breaks.
	Then I became the barrel dude.
	And the barrel is one of the hardest ones.
	I'm not even making that up, in the thing because you could fit a lot of people in there, and it's just a huge swing.
	Here, if you go to my camera real quick, camera two, you would get these people in a barrel.
	You would put six people in the barrel.
	That's like the maximum.
	It's at a dead stop.
	It's just hanging by ropes.
	So you push it forward, you push it back, push it forward, push it back until it's like above your head and you're like pushing it with just your hand because it's like so, it's gotten so much height.
	And then when you come back down again, you jump up, so now it carries you back.
	And when it goes to the end of its swing, you pop back on the ground and you fucking pivot it.
	And you, you, like, put your hand on one side and you pivot with the ropes, and it fucking spins.
	And it was hard to learn how to do it.
	It's a technique.
	It's a skill thing.
	And sometimes fat, drunk guys will be like, how funny would it be if you pushed us?
	Oh, can you do it?
	We'll give you extra money.
	They give you extra money.
	It was really a blast.
	But let's go back to the video of this.
	So I think you guys should, there's fire breathers, people that put knives down their throats, shit like that.
	I think it'll be a really fun time to do a little content out there.
	So look forward to that.
	I'm hereby declaring that we have to do it.
	Gavin's already shown a little bit of interest in it.
	I'd be down to buy a shield, and we can do...
	Camera one?
	What's up?
	No, we should get the armor and the weapons and stuff and just do some fighting.
	We're going to go all out when we go there.
	And we're going to blog the food.
	So anyway, that's...
	If you go to the next video...
	Now, let's say you're already on board.
	You know that the Renaissance Fair is a fun time.
	It's a little escapism.
	You get to dress up all dumb.
	You get to drink mead and huge beer with a turkey leg.
	You know that it's awesome.
	Now this one, this is a brand new Renaissance Fair in the Putnam Valley.
	Here, turn up the volume.
	There we go.
	I'm sorry, go ahead.
	All right, let me go through this here.
	They have a black queen.
	Literally, black queen.
	Not that I have any problem with that, but it's obviously not really.
	Number one Renaissance ban.
	Yeah, it's not historically accurate.
	Not only that, they don't have any like...
	They have one set piece that's just like a huge castle.
	And it's just people in a field dancing around.
	Dude, I feel bad making fun of it because they're trying.
	But, I mean, it just looks shitty.
	You know, you can see there's like modern buildings in the background.
	There's just like tents, like pop-up tents.
	It's a brand new one, so hopefully maybe they'll like expand and get good.
	But there's no way that you can do what the New York Renaissance Fair is.
	Like, it is literally like two or three towns worth of time, like, you know, what is it?
	Period accurate shit.
	Anyway, I'm probably severely boring you, but we'll go back to camera one real quick.
	So, you know, let's go into the regular show here.
	We're going to start the show.
	Now, hey, bud, what we're going to do is I'm going to help you start the show.
	No, we got to do the start the show graphic thing.
	Oh, yeah.
	So, here, let me...
	I'll just...
	So, camera one, and then press play.
	Let's start the show.
	Now you unclick that one.
	That button.
	I think it's disc one or disc two.
	Yes.
	Thank you.
	Great.
	So that went smooth.
	I forgot to tell you that I still have that Biden thing afterwards.
	I just fade it out.
	Gavin didn't want that at the end.
	It still exists there, but I just fade it.
	So there's a little peek behind the curtain.
	And now we're going to hit racism.
	So, Holly Boy, if you go to the desktop, any open desktop, yeah.
	And then here, I'll do it for you here.
	Bam.
	Bam.
	And let's talk about racism.
	Go for it.
	I'm a black female.
	What other different, what else could I have done to piss you off?
	Black woman?
	This is really inconvenient.
	Alright.
	Now we're in the racism segment.
	I came up with this.
	I just pulled together a quick slideshow from R slash accidental racism.
	It's some of the funniest accidental racism there is out there.
	So this is a racism segment, but what we're about to look at is just accidental.
	Nobody means any harm by it.
	Yeah, we would scroll through these.
	There we go.
	Starting with this one.
	Yeah, I could take over from it, actually.
	So just, yeah, make me small.
	Cool.
	Buy now.
	Okay.
	That's not good.
	Is there a way to zoom out of this?
	Let's see.
	Anyway, so that's some, you know, a thing that says buy now.
	And then the caption was, I hope they're talking about the shirt.
	If this is true, I actually screenshotted this.
	If you Google how are shitty people created, it says, did you mean how were white people created?
	I don't feel that that's so accidental.
	This is an Australian bus with an interesting license plate.
	I mean, Australia is an English-speaking country.
	There's no excuse.
	That's hilarious.
	Peanuts, the verified account of their Twitter, posted this.
	You're one of the good ones.
	Interesting.
	Barack Obama, you know, when you repost something, it cuts off the text.
	So I think what he was trying to say is, while president, there used to be a painting depicting the night, but it cut off in an unfortunate spot.
	Oh, man.
	Yes.
	Let's see.
	In Maine, this is a little thing from some site.
	Best, best parts of Maine, lowest violent crime rate.
	Maine ranks as the safest state in the country, as there were just 124 violent crimes reported for every 100,000 residents, less than a third of the national rate.
	The worst part about Maine, least diverse, according to latest census data, 94.4% of Maine's population is white, beating out nearby Vermont and New Hampshire as the least diverse states.
	Now, that's unfortunate.
	Somebody labeled this crate white power.
	Interesting.
	Strips, yeah, yeah.
	This is this great AI generator that we've been loving lately.
	If you type in black people, it has a propensity to associate black faces with mugshots for some reason.
	That's fucked up.
	This is the actual screenshot.
	I know I had to charge my battery.
	But yes, this confirms that the How Are White People Created thing is real.
	In Halo, the color palette for Juneteenth was called Bonobo, which is a monkey.
	That's unfortunate.
	I'm not even sure.
	Are bonobos from Africa?
	And that wraps that segment up there.
	Let me see.
	Hey, Siri.
	What country are the bonobo monkeys found?
	Here's what I found from World Wildlife Fund.
	Wild bonobos can only be found in Africa.
	The Congo.
	Okay.
	So I guess just unfortunate.
	Number 17.
	Link 17.
	Here's some more.
	This is actual racism.
	The 16-year-old is getting bullied, racially profiled.
	Do my fucking neighborhood!
	Burning that racist!
	I told you not to!
	Get out of my face.
	I'm not in your face!
	Get out of my neighborhood!
	Fuck why!
	Who got a gun?
	Who got the gun?
	The guy who's got a permit to carry you.
	You got a gun?
	You're the one that would get a gun.
	Get out of this neighborhood!
	But y'all want to smash the fucking window?
	Smash the window?
	So yeah, this poor kid was probably literally doing nothing, wasn't burning out.
	Like, they said that he was burning out and racing through the fucking development.
	You know, I don't know why they have such a big problem with that.
	Of course, Shizmabin, he has a...
	He's a little biased.
	He usually is like, yo, white people and cops be shitty, dog.
	But there's obviously more to the fucking story.
	They're not just like, get the fuck out of it.
	I don't know.
	Where was that?
	Was that filmed in Maine?
	Anyway, but Shizmabin has his moments.
	He could admit when white people are hilarious.
	So he did post this language warning, but it is funny.
	Okay, wait.
	This is what annoys me about Instagram.
	You have to pause it, then you have to unmute, and then hopefully you got it in time.
	And we did.
	Enjoy.
	Trying to run game on me and my pops?
	Suck my dick!
	How about you clip the hair on my balls and suck my monkey nuts, you fucking treasure!
	Trying to run game on the old white man?
	Go try that shit on someone else, you fucking smile.
	Bitches and OnlyFans!
	We don't pay for pussy, you stupid ass bitch!
	You think you're hot shit?
	Well, you can suck my fucking old 70-year-old shribbled-up fucking cock!
	Back in my day, bitches would suck dick at the snap of a finger.
	What the fuck is wrong with this generation?
	I was born in 1953, you fucking trees.
	And while you were sucking dick in the stairways, guess what I was doing?
	I was fucking your grandmother.
	He's old and he's broke.
	And I laugh at you, bitches, like a fucking joke.
	Back in the 60s, we had gangbangers too.
	But wait, dad, this is 2022.
	We're bitches at fucking the Bronx Zoo.
	Father-son duo?
	2022.
	PCS.
	And if you're not jacking us, fuck you too.
	Y'all bitches trying to- That's so fucking good.
	I like how they could admit when white people do be funny as fuck, though.
	I've never heard of the term trees before, but uh, man, I'm gonna start using it.
	Can you look that up?
	Can you look up the meaning of trees?
	I don't even know how to spell that.
	Is that an Italian thing?
	No, I mean, I don't know.
	That guy doesn't look.
	They look Italian?
	No?
	Or maybe Jewish.
	Yeah, there we go.
	Yeah, definitely.
	Oh, okay.
	Often used to identify a hoe in New York.
	Wow, I've never heard that.
	That's pretty good.
	Trich.
	Damn.
	Okay.
	Now number 19, we have to really recognize, I know a lot of people say Dano Link 19.
	I think we can all agree that although hip-hop is a problem, a problem influence for the black community, right now in 2022, the biggest threat to influencing our youngsters is buddy and daddy, she don't give a fuck.
	She be tweaking, she shaking her butt.
	That's good.
	So, you know, 2022, it's a little bit different.
	You know, back in my day, fucking hip-hop music used to cause the youngsters to be all wily, but no.
	All right, so now, if you don't mind, Dano, we're going to hit a green screen.
	So, here, let me walk you through it real quick.
	Ba-ba-da.
	Bop.
	And then take one.
	And you would press seven, red, seven, and then play.
	Green screen.
	Come on, everybody.
	Come on, everybody.
	Okay, so this is a green screen.
	I didn't set it up, but this is about how, you know, Gavin often says that animals are losers.
	Not only are they losers, I agree with him, for the most part, but they're also very rude.
	Look at this interview with little animals and tell me these aren't rude.
	What's up, everybody?
	Welcome to Tiny Mike Interviews 2.
	I just want to make a quick disclaimer before the video starts that all of the exotic animals that you'll see today are from a permitted facility in California called Zoo to You Conservation Ambassadors.
	Very special to me.
	This is where I started zookeeping in college.
	But I want to be...
	So she and skip forward to like just maybe like 30 seconds past.
	She looks like a sweet chick, you know?
	I mean, just like a nice girl, cares about animals.
	She's taking the time to interview these animals and look how rude they are there.
	Go ahead.
	Food, sir?
	What is that?
	That's so normal.
	It's rude, is what it is.
	What is it?
	Is that a porcupine?
	Looks like it.
	Or a hedgehog?
	Nah, hedgehogs are small.
	That's a very long answer.
	Thank you.
	Wow.
	And pause?
	Did you notice how self-centered that thing is?
	You know, she asked one question.
	He's just like, oh, I like to eat this.
	I like to eat corn.
	We asked you one question.
	It's not a biography.
	Go ahead.
	Best way to start a conversation.
	Like, that thing costs money and you're just gobbling down on it with your huge beak.
	Questly, what's your favorite thing?
	His feathers are already ruffled.
	Being a capybara?
	Dude, if you don't want to do the interview, fucking you can say no.
	Capybara?
	Just an asshole.
	Thank you.
	Godzilla, what's it like being land's fastest animal?
	Now this guy is pretty cool, actually.
	I'm dead serious.
	I don't know how they did that because the tracking on it is so good.
	I don't think it was like just a JPEG of...
	I really think, in my heart of hearts, somehow they found perfectly fitting pit vipers.
	Can you rewind?
	Because if that's just like, you know, a PNG tracking his face, look how good that is.
	I don't know.
	Spike, would you be willing to do an interview?
	There's the hedgehog.
	It's...
	That was repetitive?
	That's a hedgehog.
	Yeah.
	Pixel, why are you always so sleepy?
	Okay, now she's being rude to this guy.
	He's trying to sleep, and now she's...
	Alright, you know what?
	I think we get the point.
	If you could just exit full screen and go to the next tab to the right.
	This is Reader.
	That targets hygiene in public restrooms.
	Hello, Leons.
	My name is Amos.
	I am Joy.
	We are here as Integral 3 Company Limited.
	We are asking for 250,000 for 10% of our equity.
	Okay.
	Wait, what is this?
	How much is 250,000 Kenyan shillings in American dollars?
	20 bucks.
	250,000 Kenyan shillings is equivalent to about 2,130 US dollars.
	So they're asking for $2,000 for their company.
	What did they invent?
	Lions, I'm pretty sure you can all relate to the times when you have been in town, stuck in traffic or some place in town, and you really have to use the bathroom.
	But at the back of your mind, you have the idea of how a public toilet is going to be.
	Worst case scenario, in town with your kids.
	They are tugging at the hands of your scout.
	Mom, I need to go to the loo.
	At the back of your head, you still have the picture of the jam-ridden surface that your kid has to sit on.
	This is an example of every other time when a public bathroom is not only a necessity, but simply a case of having only that one choice.
	When you get in there, you have to do your one-minute scan.
	And at this point, that is where we introduce our toilet toilet seat covers.
	These are three ply toilet seat covers, giving you not one, not two, but three antibacterial.
	So they have invented, I don't believe that there's three layers, by the way, but even if there is, basically just toilet seat covers.
	And that's something that like, you know, not third world countries would just supply for you, like a toilet seat cover or whatever.
	But you'll find out that like their margins are really bad for what they're offering.
	And by the way, it's like, why not just do that with toilet paper?
	So, and another thing, yeah, like how dirty is the, like, So, this would have to mean that literally every public bathroom in Kenya is so dirty that you would actually need to have.
	Like, I know gas station bathrooms can be really bad, a Burger King bathroom can be pretty bad, but for the most part, any public bathroom is like suitable.
	So, not only did they really, like, not invent something, they just reinvented the wheel.
	But for your ass cheeks.
	Some places they just have the hole.
	Some places just have a hole.
	Yeah, what are you going to put that on?
	No, like literally in the bathroom, there's just a hole, and then you squash it.
	No, I believe you.
	But it's like, Sharks, we are asking for $2,000 for 50% of our company.
	What are you inventing?
	You know the things that already exist.
	We ain't going to do it, but it's a portable version.
	And then they're like, I have another invention.
	Okay, wait.
	Yeah, I'm going to go into a Kenyan shark town.
	I'm going to be like, sharks, I'm asking for $2,000 for 10% of my company.
	And wow, that is a pretty big valuation.
	This beta be good.
	Do not waste my time.
	And then I'm like, okay, my invention is, why don't we stop shitting on the seats?
	Like, why are the seats dirty?
	Is it because of African buns germs?
	I don't think so.
	I think it's because they're shitting and pissing on the seats and not cleaning it up.
	My invention is called public decency.
	If you make a bpee or poo-poo all over the place, you wipe it up.
	It's called common sense.
	It's called a modicum of dignity under the sea.
	That about wraps.
	I think, you know, I can go on forever about, you know, how Kenyan Shark Tank is hilarious, but, you know, I hope to do this more in the future.
	I have an entire Google Doc about silly inventions and serious inventions.
	And I try to do it by ethnicity, you know, because there's not a lot of black entrepreneurs.
	But the problem that they have when they go on Shark Tank is they have one of three inventions.
	It's either clothing, like a clothing line that has no proprietary, you know, there's nothing specific or proprietary that they have a claim to, or it's like food, like I swear, lemonade.
	One of them is honey.
	The other one is like a chicken sauce, like a barbecue sauce.
	And the other one is hair products, inevitably.
	They really don't escape those three categories.
	So it's sad that like, you know, most of their products never get picked up because it's like, you don't own this idea.
	So that seems to be a problem.
	I mean, I'm also going to say that this is an Asian problem too.
	Not a lot of inventive Asians out there.
	One of them had this light therapy that was just like kind of out there already, but the way she branded it, what Asians are good at is copying things and maybe improving them, but not really inventing.
	For some reason, it seems like white people have really invented inventing and they have total proprietary license over it because I don't see a lot of other people doing it.
	Nice fade.
	Alright, so I kind of bailed on that first one of animals being rude because I think we know that already.
	So why don't we hit the next segment, My Pet Biden.
	So blank desktop.
	And I'll actually...
	You want me to get it?
	I'll do it.
	It's just quicker for me to locate all this stuff, but alright.
	Camera 7.
	Biden.
	There you go.
	On him I can depend.
	My cat.
	Biden.
	A monster of a president.
	He's big and food.
	Sleepy.
	But a friendly monster too.
	My cat.
	Biden.
	Wait, what?
	That doesn't rhyme.
	Sweet.
	All right.
	That wasn't a yawn.
	I'm cracking my jaw.
	TMJ is.
	Yeah, dude.
	Brutal.
	I got TMJ like two days ago.
	Really?
	My daughter has a cough.
	She's had a bad cough for the past couple days, and her nose is super runny.
	She's sick.
	And I think I caught whatever she's got.
	But now my right ear is like deaf.
	Not good.
	So first link, number 20 for my pet Biden.
	Obviously, the big news is that he fell off of his bike onto the earth due to Russian gravity.
	And Donald Trump responded to it by posting this video.
	Oh, is he actually using Truth Social again?
	So he used the meme where he hits the golf ball and it hits Biden down the airplane stairs, but now using it for this bike thing.
	Now, what I thought was the next link, 21, I thought this guy's...
	There you go.
	Now, 2-1.
	This guy who seems like a total DALT for trying to be like, hey, yeah, Joe Biden crashes off his bike and he asks, what's Trump doing when that happened?
	So he says, when Joe Biden was bike riding, the old geezer Trump was driving a golf cart in Tennessee.
	So basically what he did, he confirmed it was Trump.
	I mean, Trump was golfing on the same day that Biden fell off his bicycle.
	So I don't believe he was in the golf cart.
	I think he actually hit that shot.
	And the thing that we learned is Trump can drive a ball about 700 miles.
	So actually, that's very impressive.
	Camera 1.
	Yeah, I miss that for four years, basically, Trump was responsible for literally all the problems in the world.
	Yeah.
	And now he's gone, and they're like, no, the blame is more specific.
	It's got to be specifically Trump in a golf cart.
	So now we're going to hit a quick feminism.
	These are quick topics.
	Just want to get them out the way here.
	Desktop?
	Yep.
	Good desktop.
	And it's that feminisms.
	Who here identifies as a feminist?
	We are the storm.
	The very form of change that the world has been waiting for.
	Who said I was too pretty to fight?
	That's the topic of Gonaski literally if you don't realize how your behavior is horrible.
	Okay.
	So, can you do the feminism background?
	Same place where you got the Joe Biden background, but it's all pink stuff.
	Repeal the 19th Amendment.
	That's correct.
	Oh, there we go.
	So, just two things.
	It's a quick segment here.
	Feminism.
	Number 2-2.
	Antifa hates feminists now.
	I thought...
	I don't remember them doing this to feminists.
	I remember them maybe attacking TERFs or something like that for some anti-trance thing.
	But they just straight up don't like feminists anymore.
	Link 2-2.
	Like one of the things that ballet dancers wear.
	A dooto.
	Oh, and if you want, can you pot down Mike 3?
	It's the third channel on that soundboard.
	Third one, right?
	Mm-hmm.
	Put it all the way down?
	Cool.
	Yeah.
	Remember when people would literally just fight wars over, you know, maybe a 2% tax on tea?
	You know, maybe they were just upset because someone genuflected on the wrong spot during mass, so they decided to challenge them to war.
	And now we just get walked all over.
	You know, we gotta do the right thing.
	Always.
	Yeah, I mean, we're pussified.
	I mean, even Antifa has become pussified because they don't have proud boys to throw piss bottles at to engage with them in violence.
	Well, because they don't know what to do that Trump's not president now, because you can't really get mad at someone with a Trump hat.
	Right.
	Yeah, they don't know where to aim their anger no more.
	So now they're just, and this is perfect for them.
	This is what they're doing.
	Also, they always wear masks.
	Like, I don't get it.
	Now, people who wear masks, it is a political statement, unless you're in a hospital or something, but you're outside, it's 90 degrees, you're wearing shorts and a spaghetti string tank top, and you're wearing a mask.
	Okay, we get it.
	You've voted for Joe Biden.
	Let me just check this out.
	This is trending.
	Marvel's Miles Morales, what-if issue, number four, faces fan backlash due to racial stereotypes.
	I'd love to see the amount of backlash.
	I'd love to see who these people are.
	I doubt it, first of all.
	New Marvel comic which reimagines what would have happened if the hugely popular Miles Morales became Thor instead of Spider-Man and has recently received a huge backlash online for its stereotypical depiction of a black neighborhood.
	I thought he was like half Dominican, half black.
	Anyway, fans have picked up on the stereotypes featuring quotes from rap albums, sneakers hanging from the telephone lines and Miles saying Asgard is his hood.
	What?
	Wait, that's how they talk.
	Are you saying like black culture is racist inherently?
	Sneakers hanging from telephone lines, that's a thing.
	That's real.
	That happens.
	Why does he have like boobs?
	Saying that's my hood?
	That's...
	How the fuck is that?
	Doesn't it look like he has boobs in this picture?
	Yeah, he's got...
	And he has a pride hammer, too.
	Is it a pride hammer?
	I don't know.
	It's a little rainbow-y.
	Yeah.
	Oh, it's all like...
	Well, I mean, if you're going to say that the sneakers on the telephone wires is racist or saying my hood, what about graffiti?
	Graffiti on his hammer?
	So that's kind of saying, like...
	It's like if Captain America had graffiti on his shoes.
	There we go.
	No, they are.
	They are talking about the graffiti.
	Graffiti adorning many of the buildings and shoes hanging from telephone wires.
	Okay, yeah, that's what a hood looks like, my sir.
	Yeah, he's got the pride.
	What about the fact that he wears Jordan 1s?
	Like, isn't that a stereotype?
	Did he really?
	Yeah, he's got...
	Like, when the Spider-Man came out, see those ones right there?
	They actually came out with those and they're pretty sick.
	Not going to lie.
	Eyes on me.
	Because that is a Tupac album.
	Okay.
	All Eyes on Me, that's true.
	Racist Tropes.
	Anyway, this is now going into racism, but let's go to 23.
	One more thing on feminism that I think is pretty funny.
	And I think in many ways, it all comes back to feminism.
	I mean, before women had the right to comment on guys' shit like dungeons and fucking dragon, no, and Spider-Man, I don't think this would have been a problem.
	Okay, so in a recent interview today, let's go see that again.
	Rich women using poor women's wombs and bodies because they're worried about their career is more of a capitalist dystopia than the feminists when they think it is.
	So true.
	In a recent interview today, Jamie, I don't know who the fuck she is, explained why she decided to use a surrogate.
	She said she had been terrified of becoming pregnant because of the potential effect it would have on her acting career.
	So she just had somebody, hey, you have my baby for me.
	It's really extra just disgusting and selfish because there are women who know the risk and know before they get pregnant that they might die.
	And they still do it because they want to have a child that badly.
	And this person is so superficial about having a child that she wants someone else to have a fur.
	And then probably she's going to, you know, send her kid to boarding school.
	Yeah, she's going to raise the kid?
	Likely not.
	And I'm going to have an au pair, and you know.
	And then when my kid's doing heroin at 17 and hates me, I'm going to be like, it's the Republicans' fault.
	I'm going to have my kid, my kid is going to be like me.
	They're going to make somebody else do heroin for them because of the negative effects it has.
	But they still want to.
	I think this chick is pretty funny.
	I think it's funny she wants a surrogate so it doesn't harm her career.
	Meanwhile, I have no idea who she even is.
	Yeah, totally true.
	I don't know who this is.
	Let's find out.
	What is she from?
	I think she's...
	She's that one Asian actress in all the movies.
	In all the shit?
	I was terrified of putting my life on hold for two years plus, she said.
	In my industry, it feels like you're easily forgotten if you don't work within the next month of your last job.
	Things are so quickly paced in what we do.
	Alright.
	She just replied, we still don't know.
	Oh, you know, she should be worried that her acting career is infringing on her parenthood.
	Yeah.
	It's totally sacrifice.
	What happened?
	Where is the sacrifice in life?
	Oh.
	Yeah.
	Nothing good comes from nowhere.
	And basically, there's going to be that weird talk of like, not that I'm adopted, but I came from another woman's womb.
	Yeah.
	You know, so I mean, I think it's still her egg or whatever, but it's just twisted.
	I want to be so good at guitar, but I don't want to practice it.
	Yeah.
	This is, it really is dystopian, for real.
	Like that, that amount of like editing life to be like, here, you do the thing that my body could, it's really kind of creepy.
	Anyway, so camera one, and then we'll set up the, if you could open up, go back to any desktop page.
	I'll take the reins here.
	A lot of drops.
	We're going to get into a segment that we like to call.
	And by the way, you don't have to open those up for the drops.
	You would just spacebar them.
	Oh.
	And they'd pop open.
	So we're going to do the war on kids.
	I think there's just one link for this, but.
	Hello, fam!
	I had a text page up right.
	Who wants to pass my bag?
	We are living in an ageism era where children are seen as human garbage.
	Regulations to indoctrinate American school children with poisonous and divisive left-wing doctrine.
	Fun your feet!
	All right, back to me.
	Okay.
	Hope you guys are enjoying the show, by the way.
	I really did try to work hard to try to make this seem like any other old GOML, except it's a retarded Red Zone dude hosting it.
	Link 24.
	This is that guy, Taylor Hansen, who, very luckily, by the way, is one of the few guys who didn't get arrested for being at the Capitol.
	But he was right next to Jaden X when he got shot.
	Yeah, this is gross.
	Disgusting.
	Right next to Ashley Babbitt when she got shot.
	There's an infant.
	There's a fucking woman.
	We got to keep playing it.
	I know it's really bad.
	It's so terrible.
	It's really bad.
	So what happens at the end of this, though, dude, this is the most over-the-top one.
	We've showed a bunch of these.
	This is the most over-the-top one ever.
	Can you imagine that's probably someone's dad?
	Like, that's probably someone's dad.
	It could be.
	She takes her shirt off.
	So it's a dude.
	So their chest is...
	They're able to show their chest.
	Say no to drugs.
	Say yes to tacos.
	It looks like this chick said yes to tacos too many times, though.
	Don't say yes to tacos that much.
	You know, there's just overtly sexual things going on.
	Now she sees Taylor and recognizes him and calls him out.
	And apparently there were kids that were really disturbed and scared and they had to leave.
	And well, don't scare my kid over here.
	I'm sorry, baby.
	This is why I didn't bring mine.
	And then, oh, the train says, this is why I didn't bring mine to work.
	But you see that and your gut reaction is, this is disgusting.
	And then society is telling us, no, no, no, no, no.
	You need to learn to tolerate this.
	Like, honestly, right now, I'm thinking that the problem is really like 60% the parents' fault.
	Because there's shit that's terrible all over the place that you have to shield your kids from.
	But to keep them there or to go to an event that is like this, that is a sickness with the parents.
	I mean, these freaks don't have to have a packed house like they do.
	And it seems like there were a good amount of adults there.
	But the ones with kids, it's like, can you please leave?
	Like, let's say I was a tranny dancer drag queen.
	Wouldn't I be like, this isn't kid-friendly, so please take your kids out?
	They used to say that on TV, like, please get your kids out of the room.
	They don't give a fucking.
	So she realizes that.
	She says, you love to post on Twitter and call us pedophiles.
	Only if there's kids involved.
	Only if there's kids involved.
	Why are you here?
	Why?
	Why?
	Who feels the shit if there's kids involved?
	It's a little weird.
	We have an infant over there.
	Do you think that's looking where there's an infant over here?
	Yes.
	Dude, yeah, she just makes the point.
	She just leans into it.
	She says, oh, you think it's weird there's kids here?
	There's an infant over there.
	Is that weird?
	Yeah.
	That's super weird.
	No, that's a man he's talking to.
	Yeah, it is a drag queen.
	Yeah, the drag queens are all men.
	There were kids that were crying earlier.
	They were crying?
	They were not crying first of all.
	It was the reason we're because the speaker is right there.
	Maybe that's exactly the speaker.
	Not because we have drag queens here.
	I love how everybody now gets involved in their...
	This is so backwards that everybody there is like, yeah, you're the problem.
	Black guy opens the door.
	I really wish while you walk by, he was like, listen, man, I get it.
	This shit is fucking weird, don't you?
	If this shit happened back my, yo, never.
	He would just say shit that doesn't even make somebody like, yo, you gotta put it back.
	You put the black guy back.
	What did he say?
	He doesn't say anything, which is fucked up.
	He's like, yo, this shit is.
	Back when I was in gym class heroes, this shit never was fine.
	So yeah, he's unfortunate that that happened.
	So that's about that.
	Now, we're going to go to give me a blank desktop again.
	Wait, come back to me.
	And blank desktop, and I'll take control here.
	Okay, well, anger on that.
	And we're going to hit what we like to call, frankly, channel 7 or mailbag.
	Ryan, shut up, you don't have a dad.
	Let's turn our eyes to Gavin's mailbag.
	Let me touch it.
	Alright.
	Okay.
	We're back.
	So now we're going to do a little thing we like to call the mailbag, frankly, and we really like to call it a mailbag in a big way.
	We like to call it mailbag, right?
	That's what they call it.
	By the way, don't forget, get some cameos.
	Cameo.com slash Ryan Katsu Rivera.
	I would prefer if you do it on the desktop version, because otherwise, it doesn't cost you any extra to do it.
	But for some reason, if you do it in the app, it takes $10 away from me.
	I don't know what the fuck that is.
	It's like a Google charge.
	Don't support Google.
	Support me and my baby.
	Frankly, it's the baby, right?
	So I could do Trump or whatever.
	I don't know what we think about Jesse Lee Peterson now that that thing came out about him.
	I'm not sure if I believe it.
	I have to sign up to Church.
	It's bullshit.
	Wait, where did it come from?
	Church Militant.
	Oh, yeah, it's bullshit.
	Is it bullshit?
	They just stir stuff up.
	Really?
	Yeah, on the TRAD, right?
	They stir a lot of stuff.
	I think we should look into it.
	And I'm going to sign up for an account.
	You have to pay for the premium accent.
	So that's what's kind of fucked up.
	It's like in front of the paywall, they put the accusation.
	And then behind the paywall, they have what could be a piece that you look at and you're like, nah, I don't fucking know.
	So we're going to look into that.
	I mean, dude, I don't know how I...
	How I really...
	I mean, like, let's say it's all true, okay?
	Do I care?
	I don't know.
	It's just a bummer more so, if it were to be true, but I like Jesse Lee Peterson.
	That doesn't mean that he's absolved of whatever shitty things he did, but I have to look into it and make sure it really is shitty before I'm like, no, that's gay and weird.
	So I'm not going to throw him under the bus so quick.
	I'm going to look into it.
	And then that'll make me feel more confident doing my amazing cameo.
	Wow.
	Happy birthday.
	So I could wish you happy birthday.
	I could just say, what up to you?
	Roast you.
	Roasting's very fun.
	Have your friends get roasted by Trump.
	So celebrity mailbag.
	A lot of people didn't like the fact that I did it as Derek.
	Derek for more plates, more fucking dates.
	It's an accurate impression.
	It's really good.
	And listen, I will be doing Joe Rogan in the future, in the near future.
	But I'm going to be doing this for the foreseeable future.
	It's not like I have like 12 episodes and I get cut off and I chose to burn one of those episodes to do Derek for more plates, more dates.
	There's going to be more in the future.
	So I'll do, you know, all the hack people eventually down like fucking Christopher Walken.
	I'll probably have to resort to doing these hack impressions that everybody knows.
	Everybody knows.
	Whoa, it's crazy.
	Wow.
	I'll do the ones that everybody knows, but I thought it was important to do him.
	He was on Rogan.
	He's an interesting guy.
	And if you're even remotely interested in lifting or the well-being of nutrition or supplementation, you have come across Derek.
	Like I saw people in the comments being like, dude, Derek is as big as it gets before being on ABC.
	And anybody who is that famous that you will know off the bat is probably cucked, not based, and lame-pilled.
	We got to think of better names because those all suck.
	You know, cuck and libtard.
	They're getting a little boomery.
	Licentious.
	Licentious.
	Yeah, we should use big descriptive terms instead, but the guy's a chad.
	He's a funny dude.
	He thinks the vaccines were sus.
	He hasn't cucked out, said anything about how trannies are awesome or black people.
	In fact, he's gotten his videos demonetized because he's like, oh, this fucking chick, she's dressing up like a fucking man and fucking swimming, and it's fucking bullshit, dude.
	Today, the World Swimming Federation just banned trans people from it.
	Really?
	Yeah, finally.
	Big.
	Because all the girls started coming out.
	Yeah.
	It sucks.
	So hopefully, I was sent an article the other day where, like, that, whoever that chick is, who's the chick guy?
	It's a guy.
	Leah Thomas, yeah.
	Thomas.
	One of her teammates spoke out and said he's mentally ill.
	And I was like, me and my buddy were talking about how fucked she is, and she's probably going to get kicked out of school.
	But the fact that they banned trans, maybe that might help her.
	Because in What is a Woman, they went over how basically you have people who have literal...
	Show yourself?
	Oh, it doesn't come up because you switched it.
	Oh, I'm sorry.
	There we go.
	Okay.
	So they talk about how people who are legitimately mental ill, you know, which is unfortunate, and then they go and say, okay, I'm in the wrong body.
	Give me this life-altering surgery.
	So you do that to someone who's mentally ill, has up and downs, and then they think, oh, crap, I messed up.
	And then they end up killing themselves because they interviewed this transgender person who regretted their surgery, And he said, you know, seven to ten years after the operations is when the most suicide happens.
	So all of this stuff, the whole reason that they're doing it is because there's a $90,000 price tag on each surgery.
	Same thing with the vaccine.
	Oh, cool.
	If we make a bunch of people trans, we're going to make money.
	Because it's evil.
	And like, you know, scripture says, it's easier for a camel to walk through an eye of a needle than a rich man to enter heaven.
	And that's why you see so many people getting exploited for money.
	Money, they worship money.
	That's their God.
	They're evil.
	That's why calling them Satanists, they are, because they just worship mammon instead of God.
	Right.
	But I mean.
	Yep.
	And you know what?
	That's not going to pay off.
	I mean, because really, I consider myself to be just insanely wealthy when it comes to the relationships I have, and I'm just very grateful.
	Always grateful.
	I don't think I've ever had...
	I've forced myself to have like depression for creative purposes, like living in my, instead of sleeping in the room upstairs, my bedroom, back at my grandparents' house, I would sleep in the basement on the couch and fucking wake up late and go to sleep late and just wake up and smoke weed and whatever.
	Just like put myself at a disadvantage, like just like waste away to feel a little more creative.
	And it was always just like forced, I forced myself to be like, to have a struggle because I really didn't have much of a real struggle at the time.
	So I had to put one on myself.
	But besides that, LARPing as a depressed creative, I've never been depressed.
	And it's just probably because I'm just very grateful.
	And although my memory is really bad, you know, that's why I recap this weekend too, because usually it all just blends into one nice life that I just feel, but I don't really remember.
	My memories are terrible.
	I don't remember dates, when something happened, whatever.
	Just these little blurbs.
	So anytime I ever, you know, extrapolate on a memory I have, there's probably not much I could extrapolate before or after that event.
	It's just like, hey, I'm lucky to even share this with you.
	It's probably from smoking so much weed.
	I recommend you get off weed.
	Really, that'll change your life.
	Definitely.
	It gives you a ceiling.
	It's on CBD, johnnyapple.com.
	Anyway, what's it called?
	So, by the way, Derek from More Plates, More Dates, he just did a video talking about this, and Gavin was informed of it and spoke on it last night on Chrissy Mayer's podcast, too.
	C-11, I think that's the bill.
	It's a Canadian law that they're trying to pass, or bill, that would prevent any American entertainment from going into Canada, basically.
	Like, you can't, it would be an embargo on American content that comes into Canada.
	And I think, even working the other way around, where Canadian content, some of it won't go out, that doesn't sound possible.
	It sounds more like they're going to make sure that the entirety of Canada has a sanitized version of content, and it's fucked up.
	Like, that's a huge deal.
	So, you know, if you look at this video here, just show the folks where they could find it so they could sign this petition because I think you could write in or whatever.
	We have some Canadian viewers too, so you might be able to actually.
	So what's that link?
	Derek talking about YouTube fascism.
	Did you see that one?
	I lost the email.
	Oh, the email.
	Oh, wait, let me.
	I could probably figure it out.
	Let's see.
	Sorry about this, folks.
	Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.
	Is that it?
	What?
	Anyway, you could look it up on your own time.
	Go to More Plates, More Dates, and it's Bill C 11.
	There is something you could do about this.
	You could write into people.
	I know it seems like a pain in the ass to do that, but if you ever do that, sign a petition or voice your concern, it'll get you in the habit of not, you know, don't write that off as a thing.
	Like, I'm not the kind of guy that signs petitions and shit.
	It really is the only way to voice your opinion on certain things like this.
	So I'd say get used to it.
	Because if it really is the only thing you could do, I'd say do it.
	And it could be worth it.
	Otherwise, just tyranny completely unchecked and your voice is never heard.
	So anyway, do that.
	Another thing that I'd like to announce that's very just some house cleaning here.
	I'm releasing a shirt on the Censored.tv shop.
	Now, it's going to take about six to eight weeks to ship them out, but it's going to be worth it.
	I'm really excited about it.
	I did all the artwork for it, and it is about a very strange topic.
	Frankly, if you look at the Vegas shooting, it's a shirt that questions what the fuck happened in Vegas.
	And it looks good, and it is...
	Oh, you pulled it up.
	Yeah.
	Alright.
	But it's not on the screen.
	Uh-oh.
	Hey!
	Hey!
	You want to go full screen on that?
	Yeah.
	Okay.
	You would hit 7 red.
	Yeah.
	I think it's a beautiful shirt, frankly.
	Nope.
	You would actually click the button that says 7 to the left of the...
	Yeah.
	Hey!
	What happened in Vegas?
	Frankly, is it vaporwavy?
	I'm not sure.
	Ryan's been sitting on these for like a year.
	I have.
	It's been a couple months at least.
	So the most recent addition to this is the Radzone Casino graphic.
	We had one of the guys, Baby Monster, Who sent in artwork before for mom culture is awesome?
	He fucking remade my head and put it on like, you know, a fucking king or whatever.
	A fucking king or whatever.
	Fuck.
	And so I think that front graphic is really tight and it really complements the fact that it complements the style of the back thing anyway.
	So I'm not sure what the price point for that is.
	You can come back to me.
	What the price point for that is, our merch guy evaluates roughly how much the cost is.
	And then the last step would be working with me to see if we could alter the price for any reason.
	And then the Ryan Comedy album.
	And I get a little percentage of that shirt.
	And I would really be happy if you not only support the site, but you support the creatuity.
	And hopefully...
	And I really like this shirt too, so I'd be happy to see you guys wearing it.
	And if you want, here's an alternate thing.
	Once you get the shirt, I'll show you how to cut the sleeves off.
	I think it would be fun to see people in sleeveless tees.
	I got it from Weckingball.
	My buddy Weckingball loves cutting the sleeves off of shirts, and it's just a great way to make it yours.
	I really love that.
	And another thing is, all of these shirts that we got from Censored.tv, once you wash them, like, they become so good.
	I love the quality of the shirt that he gets.
	I know a lot of people, like Sam Hyde, he puts, like, really, you know, a lot of attention into the type of shirt.
	But I love this type of shirt.
	Like, I get larges now, and they just shrink down just so.
	And the graphics look, like, warmer.
	So I'm super happy about it.
	So check that out.
	It should be on the site under shop soon as well.
	Homeboys get that like edit.
	What a fucking perfect drop, dude.
	That really is a rock and drop.
	Alright, so now what we're going to do is hit the mailbag.
	This is where you could write into the show and we read the mail.
	As if you don't know that.
	Alright, this one is called Bleeps Have Talent Sucks.
	No way.
	You want to show this?
	Yeah, that is wild.
	Okay.
	That's that.
	You can cut away real quick.
	Can you do that?
	Can you do that sound?
	Can I do that?
	That's too loud.
	I tested my vocal range yesterday.
	I think I go up to like a G5.
	What's the highest I could do?
	No, I can't do that.
	I could do...
	Wait, I guess that was impressive.
	Well, he's a little boy.
	They can sing very high, which is pretty cool.
	He's like a castrado.
	Yeah.
	Alright, so this says, am I right?
	That would be safe.
	But you just...
	You just die because it's flammable.
	I don't.
	I've seen enough of these to be like, alright, yeah, I think this is safe, actually.
	No, that's not safe.
	Or you just drown with that, like, hundred pounds of steel attached to you that you can't undo.
	Pounds of steel.
	It's primal.
	Primal jetpacks and the primal liver jetpack from the primal aliens from the primal 6,000-year-old Earth?
	Primals.
	Alright.
	Oh, okay.
	This is a little...
	It says ironic shirt.
	So we could check this out real quick.
	Woman slain in Brampton, mourned as loving mom to young son.
	Well, that's fucking terrible.
	Her son is half black.
	Young mother murdered in Brampton, blah, blah, blah.
	Her shirt says, why the racist, sexist, homophobic, or transphobic, blah, blah, blah.
	And I guess that's an ironic shirt because he was killed by a black guy.
	Okay.
	Terrible.
	And is it ironic?
	Yeah.
	It's also sad.
	It's like being a victim of like fucking the son of Sam and wearing a son of Sam shirt.
	I don't know how to explain.
	Alright, apparently this is Gavin's type of bitch and her teeth are the best part.
	Let's see.
	Are dangerous.
	They'll make you laugh and laugh and laugh and then boom.
	You're naked.
	She has my teeth.
	I mean, so that's.
	Imagine your whole existence is basically just your cleavage.
	Yeah, she is pumping the cleave.
	She's got fun rock and roll hair, though.
	Wait, show this one?
	This is a filter, by the way.
	I mean, when she moves, you could tell that the nose shadow is changing.
	Yeah, she's got the same exact teeth as me, besides her bottom.
	Like, my bottoms are really straight.
	What the f?
	We can click away.
	That's enough, guys.
	My bottoms are pretty straight.
	My top ones.
	They're like her teeth, basically.
	Oh, and she probably has an old top teeth.
	Probably.
	Alright, we'll do one more and then we'll get to the final vid.
	I'm unpracticed at hosting a show not as Gavin.
	So you could always lean on the crutch of an impersonation, but this is just what it would be like if I hosted the show.
	That's what this is.
	Let's see.
	Apostrophes instead of commas.
	National American Eagle Day.
	Okay.
	Ooh.
	Hey, Carlos Santana and the Emperor.
	Oh, no.
	Don't show that.
	I don't know what time code that is, but.
	Oh, 1.52.
	Okay.
	Hey, Carlos Slantana and Emperor of the Poor Boys.
	Enough with the Nigger Day and Faggot Month.
	Ooh.
	It's time to recognize the important things.
	That beautiful, beautiful bird, which is the bald eagle.
	Today is the National American Eagle Day.
	Oh, shit, that was today.
	Oh, today is the National American Eagle Day.
	That's exciting.
	Sorry for any grammatical errors.
	Oh, Gavin's really got these people flinching before even having a mistake.
	Here's $1 with the dollar side on the opposite side of the, where it should be.
	Love Mike Gray.
	I'm not a pussy, so use my name.
	He's not ashamed of the fact that he loves this great show.
	So you could show this when I go full screeny.
	There you go.
	National Bald Eagle Day.
	Wow, isn't that something?
	You know what I should have done?
	I should have done a Karnak where I'm like, give me any three-syllable word, or just give me any word.
	Bald.
	I said, like, that's one eagle.
	Or a bunch.
	Contraception.
	Contraception.
	Okay, that works.
	It's four.
	Okay.
	Contraception.
	Okay.
	Hmm.
	Contraception.
	Let's see.
	What do you get when you take that movie where they change people's minds and their dreams, but instead it's the Iran-Contra.
	It's the contraception.
	Can I have a firearm, please?
	Let's see.
	What's our next one?
	Summary.
	Okay.
	Okay, let's see.
	In a world where there's a bunch of vowels, summary.
	Yeah, summar e.
	Okay.
	That'll be one.
	Elephant.
	Okay, elephant.
	Let's see.
	Elephant.
	Alright, that one I can't come up with anything for, but thanks for participating in that.
	We'll do one more email.
	And hopefully it's a good one, frankly.
	Two-hour show today.
	It is a long show.
	Okay, cakes for gays.
	This one's a lengthy one.
	It's what we like to see.
	Hi, homie and homes.
	This baking cakes for the gays brothers bothers me so much.
	If some tuna-sucking whores or hot dog hammer and homos forced me to bake a cake for them with court orders, I'd create the icing from my personal, quote-unquote, white frost.
	The marbled cake dark matter would contain a bit of my own, quote-unquote, dark fudge.
	The shiny sprinkles would actually be dried, quote, little boys of mine that do sparkling a bit anyway.
	That is super communist to even argue that a citizen of our formerly great country, not misspelled, he spelt it cuntry, is forced to make art or food or anything against his or her bawless, cuntless will.
	My USA flag has been upside down since 2008.
	Whoa, that means there's an emergency or an attack, right?
	That means our country is under peril, I think.
	I'd dry hump, y'all, if you put heels on.
	Thanks, Cad Girlie.
	Article, cake guy harassed for living and working consistently with his religion's belief.
	Okay.
	Wow.
	Okay, if you had to make them a cake, you'd...
	I think messing with food is the lowest you can go, honestly.
	So litigation against your freedom of turning down services or whatever is...
	I think messing with food is probably the worst thing you could ever do.
	What if you called it?
	Worse than murder, worse than rape.
	But if you called them and said, I want you to bake a cake that says kill Ryan Katzu Rivera, and they are like, I'm not going to do it.
	Or like something mean says you're gay.
	Okay, anything mean is okay, but a threat, I don't think you can make a threat cake.
	I think that's against the law.
	Okay, maybe not a threat cake.
	Anything below, you know, make whatever cake you want about me.
	I mean, if you could tweet it out or you could put it on a pastry, that's funnier.
	I mean, I don't think I'd be offended by somebody.
	Whoever can make the best cake for Ryan.
	You know what's going on?
	It's a free shirt.
	You get a free shirt.
	No, free shirt.
	But do some photoshopping.
	Yeah, you get it.
	I'll buy the shirt and give it to you if you make a cake of Ryan.
	You can say really mean things if it's on a cake, and you can send those into the actual cake.
	Put it in.
	Send the actual cake, yeah.
	Put it in.
	We'll give you a P.O. box, and then when we go check it out, it'll just be melted bullshitcakes.
	Anyway, so that's that.
	Now, we're going to do something that we call the final video.
	Alright, so can you find the final video bumper?
	I could help you out here.
	Okay.
	Ladies and gentlemen, we're about to hit the final video.
	So we'll hit seven.
	Alright.
	Final video time before we send y'all off.
	Hopefully this is a good start to your weekday.
	I know some of the baby monsters aren't a fan of this format.
	And me being here, that's fine.
	Something a little different.
	But it does take the slot of what could have been a great Gav show.
	And I understand.
	Thanks for tolerating this if you tolerate it.
	Thanks for liking it if you liked it.
	And sorry if you hated it.
	The network was taken hostage by somebody who was threatening to kill Sylvia's dog, which I think she already died.
	This is what happens when we give into terroristic demands.
	So hopefully they get what they want and they never bother this fine network again and threaten us with their basically terrorism.
	So this, whether you like it or not, is the WWE, or as I know it, WWF.
	This is one of the greatest promos that I remember seeing, in my opinion.
	Now there's timeless promos from Hulk Hogan, you know, The Rock, Stone Cold.
	Now, going with the theme of we've been told things are gay and shitty and corny.
	Nothing has the rap of shittiness and corniness like the WWE.
	These are guys who are basically actors and also doing death-defying things like jumping off of ladders, into tables, on fire, on spikes, bleeding in front of a ravenous crowd that loves what's going on.
	And these fans know that, yeah, it's scripted.
	And they know that it's fixed or faked.
	But they still love it because it's badass.
	And the amount of production and showmanship in these is not to be ignored.
	It's got something going on for it for a reason.
	People like it for a reason.
	So before you poo-poo this, just be open to how good the delivery of this is in front of a live audience.
	A guy who's just supposed to be a meathead, look at the acting and the speech he gives here.
	So Triple H just called out this poor guy, Eugene, who can't defend himself.
	And now William Regal has come out in defense of Eugene to tell Triple H what's what.
	Then I would lead that lamb to slaughter.
	No, no, no.
	What kind of a man do you think would let Eugene into the building last week?
	Rather a perplexing question, isn't it?
	What kind of a diabolical villain do you think would tell Eugene to get involved in your match?
	It was me, Sunshine.
	You see, me and you know each other very well indeed, don't we?
	Let me give you people a little history lesson.
	11 years ago, me and you were a tag team in WCW.
	In fact, I was your mentor, wasn't I?
	Yes, indeed, I was.
	What can I say?
	I mean, let's face facts.
	Some people, people like us, we're just born naughty.
	We are.
	That's why we gravitated towards each other.
	And if you would have used and abused anyone else except for that poor dear boy, Eugene, I would have applauded your cunning.
	But.
	But for a clever man like yourself, it was very foolish to take advantage of a disadvantaged boy.
	Because now you've made an enemy out of me.
	Here comes.
	And if you want to fight, look no bloody further.
	Because I will quite gladly now go and change it to my ring attire.
	And I will join you back in that ring.
	And I will battle you with every ounce of violent venom that gone through my veins.
	That's it.
	Alright, cut back to old Rye Guy here.
	Let me explain something here.
	Is it weird and fruity to play pretend, like, in Dungeons and Dragons, where, like, my mage takes out his ice sword, slashes you about the face, if I get this dice roll correct.
	We're going to raid your dungeon, and the loot that we get from it, you'll never see again.
	Plenty of battles, blood, sweat, tears, and magic have been spent to accumulate all of this.
	But I'll tell you now, it will all be mine after I thwart you and your ragtag team of miscreants going around the third realm, causing havoc.
	It ends today.
	So is it lame?
	Maybe.
	But it's fun to play pretend.
	Yes.
	It's fun to play a pretend, especially in a world that's already gone mad.
	Do you want to play by the rules?
	You know, with these puppet masters making the world all gay and shitty?
	No, make your own little world.
	Don't feel bad about it.
	And if you are being shamed about your gay little hobbies, like D ⁇ D or wrestling, well then not me, but you can get fired.
	You can get in trouble.
	You can be brave.
	And I would really appreciate it if you were to never stop fighting, frankly.

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