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Jan. 18, 2022 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes

01:40:22

S04E77 - WE BROKE UP

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	That was, of course, the Beastie Boys from their debut album, Polly Wog Stew.
	You can see behind me, we got Kate Shellen back, who was kicked out of the band for being a fat and ugly lesbian.
	This guy left the band and was so traumatized by not making any of the Beastie Boys fame money, he suffered from, he died of dementia.
	And then these guys went on to become the normal Beastie Boys.
	The song Egg Raid on Mojo is, of course, about an arrogant black man named Mojo, who was not unlike Black Lemmy that we were talking about yesterday, Dead Fred.
	Dropped Dead Fred.
	And Mojo was kind of a ska guy.
	I knew Mojo.
	He was a great DJ.
	He had an incredible collection of seven inches.
	And he would DJ around the Brooklyn areas.
	And I talked to him about the song.
	And he goes, yeah, I was a bouncer at a club and I didn't let them in because they weren't paying any money.
	Sometimes I felt nice and I'd let them in, but I didn't feel like it this day.
	And they fucking got a bunch of eggs and they were whipping eggs at me.
	They were rich kids, rich art school kids.
	And when they say art school in Manhattan, they mean like from birth.
	You can go to fancy, stupid art schools from kindergarten right up until graduation.
	Their parents were doctors and stuff, and they were like, I don't want my kid having to study and do all the stuff I did.
	So I'm sending him to fucking Play-Doh school.
	But it made for some great music, I'm not going to lie.
	And these kids were young.
	That was 81.
	They were probably like 14, 15.
	And people like to diminish the musicianship of the Beastie Boys because they were just rappers.
	But I thought that their music was good.
	Like sabotage, the fucking riff for that.
	It sounds like a bass being played like a guitar, doesn't it?
	The very beginning of sabotage.
	But yeah, that song's a very musically sound song.
	And according to Mojo, the egg raid was a failure and he was not hit once.
	I'm just saying, don't shoot the messenger.
	So that zoom, zoom, za, zoom, zoom.
	What is that?
	It sounds...
	It sounds like a bass, but also could be a guitar on the, like...
	Yes?
	On the neck pickup.
	What does that mean on the neck pickup?
	Like on a strat, there's five different ways to have the guitar sound.
	Let's see you in your blurry face telling us the stories.
	My name is Burry Face.
	Wait, the hat matches today.
	Let's put that on.
	Yeah, definitely put on a wool hat indoors.
	That doesn't look retarded.
	Perfect match.
	No, not a perfect match.
	Bought separately.
	Dude, one's blue, blue, and the other's like a green-blue.
	But they complement each other.
	No, blue and green should never be seen.
	That's a common saying, and you're blurry again.
	I didn't know that.
	Can you fix the blurry for once and for all?
	There we go.
	Nice.
	Wait, and you're scooched.
	You need to be unscooched.
	No, I like being scooched.
	Keep me scooched.
	I just felt an electric shock in my anal lips from this fucking hemorrhoid.
	Jesus Lord.
	And I went to the gym today and I go, hey, man, you blew out my ass.
	He goes, hey, you're late.
	And I go, yeah, I'm late because I had to have a shit at home because that's the only place I have a bidet and I have to put on my various creams because of you.
	He just goes, That sounds like a decree right from the mayor of Cupcakeville.
	I go, is there, like, you can report lawyers to the bar.
	Is there a place I can report trainers?
	Because you let me get fat by letting me drink fireball a lot, and that's my fat juice.
	And then you overworked me until I popped.
	Yep.
	And he was like, he doesn't even respond.
	He's just like, okay.
	Tells me to go do some other thing.
	And the shit I was doing today felt very hemorrhoid.
	There was a box, and I'm holding two 25-pound weights, and I'm standing on the box and standing down 10 times with each leg.
	That's hemorrhoid central, is it not?
	At least there was no burpees involved.
	Oh, dude, he made me do push-ups with a rubber band across my chest.
	And I was like, what?
	Jumping on a champoline?
	This is easy.
	How many are we doing here?
	I can do a million.
	And he goes, do it for 30 seconds at three times.
	Dude, the third 30 seconds, I had cum.
	No, that sounds good.
	Right.
	I don't like cum in my body, so that's what I was trying.
	I had Satan's fire piss going through my veins.
	Great band name.
	By the way, someone called in and said, I'm fat.
	Let's settle this once and for all.
	It's not fat.
	It's just, you know.
	It's a beer gut.
	Yeah, and I just had lunch.
	That's a normal.
	It's not even hanging down.
	Look at that.
	My pants are loose.
	So anyway, suck a dick.
	Yeah.
	Fucking haters.
	Yeah, you suck a dick.
	I come really, really hard.
	Just thinking about that sentence today.
	It's funny you put that.
	I come really, I come really hard for 45.
	It's kind of the theme of today's show called We Broke Up.
	And I want to really do a deep dive green screen on this couple who are breaking up despite having four kids because they handle it like it ain't no thing, and that pisses me off.
	And there's a real trivialization of marriage going on in this country.
	But anyway, let's get to some news before we do our deep dive.
	This was, everyone is mad at me.
	Deep, deep dive.
	Everyone's mad at Joe Biden for saying that George Floyd had a bigger impact than MLK.
	By the way, you have a mask on your ear, you absolute fucking buffoon.
	Look at this embarrassing Mr. Magoo imbecile.
	Take your mask all the way off.
	Look at it hanging off his ear.
	Like this is, as far as I'm concerned, that's up there with Giuliani's dye dripping down his face.
	Give him an earpiece or like have sign language and be like, your ear, your ear, your ear.
	Anyway, listen to this.
	Even Dr. King's assassination did not have the worldwide impact that George Floyd's death did.
	I agree.
	Yeah, yeah.
	Now, I think we disagree on that.
	I think that's a sign of clown world in full effect.
	You probably think that it's good or that George Floyd is as relevant as Martin Luther King.
	I'm not sure where your head's at, Joe.
	I don't think you know where your head's at.
	But he's right.
	There was not riots in Utrecht when George, I mean, when MLK died.
	Austrians were not that concerned.
	You did not have Montreal burning down buildings and ripping down statues.
	You should have, but you didn't.
	Should you have done it for George Floyd?
	No.
	George Floyd, unlike Martin Luther King, was a fucking loser.
	It's quiet.
	Yeah, no, it's quiet for him.
	A pathetic piece of shit, career criminal drug addict who you focus on when he went, he called out for his mama.
	His girl's nickname was mama, which is pathetic.
	But he terrorized mamas, robbed them.
	He was a brutal, horrible man who preyed on the weak and hurt them.
	And you fucking losers turned him into a saint.
	In the sense that...
	I don't use the N-word, but a lot of people would call George Floyd a nigger.
	And speaking of niggers, let's jump over to Wiggers, where apparently in China, every white person who's into rap is being slaughtered right now.
	Did you know about this?
	No, that's terrible.
	I grew up with a lot of wiggers.
	I don't mind.
	I mean, I don't love Wiggers, but I don't think they should be killed.
	I got the W card, by the way.
	Look at his weird claws.
	Ew.
	He's got fucking...
	What are those dinosaurs that are super fast that a figure?
	Velociraptors?
	Yeah, he's got Velociraptor punks.
	Nobody cares about what's happening to the Uyghurs, okay?
	You bring it up because you really care.
	And I think it's nice that you care.
	The rest of us don't care.
	I'm just telling you a very hard.
	You're saying you virtually don't care?
	I'm telling you a very hard, ugly truth, okay?
	Of all the things that I care about, yes, it is below my line.
	Okay?
	Of all the things that I care about, it is below my line.
	Disappointing.
	I would like to make something clear that I disagree with this man.
	I care about the Uyghurs.
	I hope they're being genocided well.
	That's why I tune in once in a while to make sure the Chinese are doing a good job of wiping out the Uyghurs.
	Jesus Christ.
	This is what happens when you let them thrive and take over your population.
	You end up with Britain.
	You end up with, what is it that Tommy Robinson is doing?
	Tetford?
	Telford?
	Telford.
	You end up with Telford, and you end up with Luton, and you end up with Pakistani grooming gangs.
	You also end up with hostage situations in synagogues where someone with a British accent did something that the FBI, by the way, said had nothing to do with anti-Semitism.
	You know the irony of them?
	I saw there was some other news clip that was trending on Twitter today, and they were calling her a Pakistani woman and totally absolving her of the jihad reference.
	Hey, assholes, Lady Al-Qaeda likes that name.
	You taking the anti-Semitism out of her persona is not good.
	She likes that.
	She fucking hates Jews.
	So when you say, there's nothing anti-Semitic about her and her brother, you're pissing off her and her brother.
	So maybe that's good in a way.
	You're making them frustrated because you're taking away their personal agency.
	Well, I'll be dipped in shit.
	Oh, you got to use that one twice, did you?
	No.
	The other one was...
	Never happened in the States.
	Never happened in the States.
	But it literally did.
	I started watching.
	Yeah.
	I started watching it again.
	I'm on episode five.
	Good place to be, man.
	That first season rolled.
	He just kissed Melfie.
	Ooh.
	Yeah.
	That didn't really conclude so well.
	One thing is weird is he wakes up Camilla in the middle of the night when he couldn't, he went for a few weeks where he couldn't get it up, which was because he was in love with Melfie.
	And the wife wakes up and she's like, do you want sex?
	Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
	Yeah, wives are not big on that.
	I don't know if you've been married, but if you wake up your wife in the middle of the night, she usually doesn't go, wait, what's happening?
	You want a blowjump?
	Hold on.
	Oh, so lucky.
	That is a lucky bird.
	Sex is like not a big deal.
	It's not a big deal.
	For Carmella.
	Sex is like, it's not a big deal.
	Patton Oswald has become a meme.
	I wonder how he feels about that.
	What's worse?
	Being known as at least partly responsible for your wife's death or being a meme?
	This is Raiders' interim coach, Rich Bissakia?
	I don't know about football.
	In his Sinky Hotel, personally handwriting letters to his players, thanking them for their hard work.
	Incredible.
	They got the mirror angle and everything.
	And then this one, so there's a big meme, Elmo versus Rocco.
	And I'm embarrassed to admit that the country I live in knows about Elmo even when they don't have kids.
	Now, my kids are too old for Sesame Street, so I'm, call me a show-off, but I don't know about Elmo anymore.
	And apparently, Elmo, you just ruined it, Ryan.
	I didn't show it.
	No, you did.
	That's fine, though.
	Apparently, Elmo has this chick friend, and she has a pet rock named Rocco.
	And Elmo hates that.
	Maybe you can dig that up.
	And apparently, Sesame Sweet overdid it a little bit because Elmo gets really fucking pissed at this rock.
	So it became a meme, Elmo versus Rocco.
	And I guess, I don't really know how the meme goes.
	They'd have like me and Ryan fighting, and it would be the worst fight since Elmo versus Rocco, that kind of thing.
	But if you can find that.
	Is that Elmo versus Rocco?
	Yeah, he gets pissed, apparently.
	Yeah!
	Yeah!
	Yonko is in the movie!
	Let's hear it for Rocco!
	Great, Elmo!
	Welco does it like Elmo!
	Great, yeah!
	Now, Elmo can finally tell everyone that today's number is...
	Elmo, Kelly.
	Who's stopping you?
	Great.
	Today's number is...
	12!
	Rocco says the number is 12!
	Elmo is supposed to say the number of the days!
	Sounds like the font.
	Rocco.
	Yeah, a little bit.
	Rocco says you were taking too long.
	He couldn't wait anymore.
	What say the number of the day?
	But no.
	Elmo has to stay to Rocco.
	Elmo has to play this killing brandy.
	Anyway, he doesn't like the rock.
	No.
	Not the ex-wrestler, the actual rock that's in her hand.
	And they had Elmo on SNL to lampoon the meme.
	And then within this making fun of the meme, they pulled in our boy Patton Oswald.
	Okay, now you can show.
	That's it.
	There's Elmo.
	So go back a little bit.
	Why do you have just the picture there?
	Yeah.
	These clips of you going on crazy unhinged rants about how Rocco's not real.
	Okay, okay, look.
	Elmo admit Elmo overreacted.
	And Elmo has already apologized in a long Instagram post.
	And I'm ready to move on.
	Well, that's great to hear, Elmo, because although Pat is a liberal now, so he probably sees that in that he has what we're going to get to in this video with these like everything's okay blinders.
	Uh-oh, there's Rocco.
	What?
	Why does Rocco get a chair?
	Because Rocco's our guest, Elmo.
	Rocco!
	Rocco doesn't need a chair!
	He doesn't even have niggas!
	What is Rocco doing here?
	He was in the building getting the COVID test.
	Is Elmo eating an SNL cast member?
	You like doing your little Elmo impersonations, don't you?
	Hi, I'm Elmo.
	Yeah.
	When we went on the skiing trip, I would do that, and then your son would always be like, just, whenever there's somebody new around, just clam up and just go, like, I'm not talking to you or saying hi to you.
	I'm like, hi.
	And he's like, and then you do the Elmo, and then that breaks him.
	You can't resist the Elmo.
	Johnny?
	I'm like, hi, I'm Mamo.
	And he's like, that's pretty good.
	It's pretty good, but I'm still not saying hi to you.
	Yeah, that's a survival instinct.
	Because cave babies used to get rocks thrown at them.
	Right, rock and rock.
	That's why they hate Rocco.
	That's why they hate rocks.
	It's genetic.
	You used to hit me with those and drive me in your cave.
	Here's a controversial opinion I have based on nothing.
	I think Joss Whedon is innocent.
	I think Hollywood stars are shitheads.
	And every time I read about this horrible man who's a disgusting rapist who is a racist murderer, you read the actual allegations and they're like, the set was toxic.
	Okay, good.
	It's what, a $700 million budget?
	If 50 of my million was in there, I'd want it to be toxic.
	I'd want it to be like a military base.
	I'd want it to be like, what's it called?
	Bootcamp.
	Yeah, I'd want it to be like boot camp.
	Filmmaker Joss Whedon claims he was powerless to resist affairs while on Buffy Set, denies threatening Gal Godo's career, and claims he cut Ray Fisher from the Justice League because he was a bad actor.
	Now, the first allegation is that he was fucking and sucking all over the place during Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
	Yeah.
	Actresses are whores.
	They fuck around.
	That's how they get there often.
	They have the casting couch.
	I mean, how many women refused Harvey Weinstein and lived to tell the tale?
	There was, I think, Mira Servini.
	Mira Servino, yeah.
	And maybe one other actress was like, I'm not sucking your dick.
	The rest of them were like, I sucked his dick and I hated it.
	Okay, so you're a whore.
	You just don't like that the cost was so high for your whoredom.
	So I don't give a fuck that he was making out with a bunch of people on the set.
	It was consensual.
	And one woman says, oh, he was rolling around with this chick and he kept bumping into my chair.
	What?
	He was having an affair.
	So I assume each time he fooled around with a chick, it was in a broom closet or something.
	You don't go rolling around when you're having a secret affair.
	And then we have Gail Godot.
	So the beef was she thought that in the second movie, whatever, her second appearance as Wonder Woman, she was coming off as a little too aggressive.
	And he's like, people don't give a shit about the consistency of a superhero.
	And she goes, well, I want to cut this scene.
	And he goes, you'll have to kill me before we cut that scene.
	You'll have to tie me to the tracks and have a train run over me.
	But she doesn't get tie me to the tracks.
	It's a jokey way to say you'll have to kill me.
	And I think it's because she's Israeli.
	It's a culture gap.
	She's not familiar with all our silly colloquialisms.
	So she claims that he said, you'll never work in this town again.
	No, he did a joke about being tied to the tracks.
	It's actually a cartoon thing that cartoon villains do.
	And then lastly, the black guy, Ray Fisher, he goes, I was quit.
	By the way, the guy completely nuclear bombed his career, Ray Fisher, by saying, I'm taking you to court.
	I demand Marvel do an investigation of you.
	Like, if they were making me eat live chickens and masturbate in front of old ladies without their permission, I could see going, you know what?
	I don't like it here.
	But what kind of abuse would you have to go through when I checked out his IMDb?
	You know what he did before he was cyborg on like the biggest movie in the world?
	Nothing.
	Check out Ray Fisher's IMDb.
	He was in a short.
	You know who else was in a short?
	Everyone.
	Me, Ryan, you.
	When your friend was in film school, he said, can you be the woman who works at the 7-Eleven?
	Okay, so go down a bit.
	He was Emmett Till when he was a little kid, which is probably why they chose him, right?
	Look at that.
	2008, he's in a short.
	Then he's in the Astronaut Wives Club as a patient, right?
	Oh, no, Captain Edward Dwight.
	I don't know what the fuck that is.
	So he appeared as a captain on a show where he's an astronaut, I guess, with one episode.
	And then the next thing you know, you're in the Batman versus Superman, Dawn of Justice.
	Then they stick him in True Detective.
	I couldn't find any footage of him acting, but I'm going to guess he sucked.
	At least I'm open to it when you've had, I'm not going to count the short, one role.
	I mean, is that affirmative action or pandering or what?
	How many actors went to like theater school and did a bunch of movies and were on TV for decades, they'd kill to be cyborg and Donna Johnson's like, no, we're going to choose a kid who was Emmett Till back in whenever.
	Wait, was he Emmett Till?
	Go down more.
	Maybe he wasn't even Emmett Till in that woman movement.
	Woman of the movement.
	Looks like he played Gene Mobley.
	Okay.
	Anyway, fuck off.
	Who cares?
	Fucking Gene Mobley.
	So yeah, I think this Josh Witten guy might be just fine.
	Speaking of Ray Fisher, the guy we're just talking about, to Fisher had a few screen credits playing the half-man, half-cyborg, the first black superhero in DC Film Universe, was both a huge career break and a major responsibility.
	So don't bitch about it unless it's something big.
	Justice League was released in 2017, the year before Marvel broke ground with Black Panther.
	He was mindful that the film was overseen almost entirely by white executives and white filmmakers.
	I mean, look, Hispanics are white.
	And I don't say that's not my crazy race thing, where I say even Asians are white.
	Hispanics are white to look at, to the tune of like 80 to 90% of them, right?
	So America's 65% this white.
	It is 20% Hispanic, 15%.
	So America's basically 75% white to look at.
	So yeah, a lot of the executives and filmmakers in Hollywood are going to be white.
	Sorry.
	Is that racism?
	There's a weird implication, too, that because a group is predominantly white, like all the top chess players, then it's a racist group.
	The top mathematicians, I'm sure, are Asian and white in this country.
	Are they, do we just, is it a given that they don't want black people around?
	Fuck you.
	Stop insulting me and accepting that insult like it's just a fact.
	I was with Gavin, and as a black man, of course, that was hell.
	What?
	Why?
	Fuck you.
	War.
	And then what's 17?
	17?
	That was the Hollywood Reporter?
	Did we already show that?
	Yeah.
	Yeah, that's it there.
	That one is so up his ass.
	He opens up about Justice League.
	And we crawl inside.
	I don't believe some of these people are fit for leadership.
	What a fucking absolute pussy.
	All right, let's jump to this monolith of a green screen that's going to consume about half the episode.
	Are you ready?
	Oh, yes.
	Before we get started, look at this sign over here, this Mets sign.
	I love when people have the balls to do this, when brands have the balls to do this.
	This means Budweiser supports the Mets.
	And Yankees fans, you're welcome to have a Bud, but we're Mets guys.
	I saw a mattress company do that once, and it said in the New York Post, we support the Mets.
	And I was like, wow, you just lost a ton of Yankees sleepers.
	And Trump did the same thing.
	When he ran for office, he shattered his brand.
	He divided his audience in two.
	It doesn't really matter that he's Republican.
	The same thing would have happened if he chose Democrat.
	He would be ostracizing all these Republican people that want to stay at Trump Tower, Trump Hotels, all that stuff.
	You cut the brand in half.
	So it's a pretty ballsy thing to do.
	Thanks.
	Thanks, bud.
	Anyway.
	How's your relationship?
	How's your marriage?
	How's your engagement going?
	It's not going good for Kyra and Oscar.
	They're a teen couple who got engaged after Kyra got pregnant.
	They have since made four beautiful children.
	Doesn't look like they took one moment's break since the first one.
	They have four, and the eldest seems to be around four.
	Maybe six.
	I don't know.
	But they're all young little kids.
	And this is a video they made, I think, about a month ago.
	So let's see how it's going with Kyra and Oscar, their imminent marriage, and their four beautiful children.
	Good morning.
	He's engaged.
	We have some updates for you guys.
	Check this out.
	Turn it up.
	I can't hear anybody.
	Whoa.
	Baby is walking like it ain't no thing.
	The second update is that we're All very sick, if you couldn't just tell by her disgusting nose.
	But, anyways, luckily, we're all finished.
	Is it healthy to vlog?
	Yeah, we're finally there.
	Healthy to put your life on camera like that and show all your children, talk about all your troubles.
	They have something like a million and a half subscribers, so they're paying the bills with this.
	Probably making a hundred and twenty grand a year.
	Throughout all of that, our little child learned how to walk, and we at least caught the very first time she took like actual steps on camera.
	Wait, wait, wait.
	Okay, so here is this guy.
	He's showing the first steps of his daughter, his youngest kid.
	And everyone is involved in this family.
	Everyone's paying attention.
	He just gets up and goes.
	And that's an update.
	So you're seeing two different videos.
	One was the baby learning to walk, and then here's the baby two weeks later, totally comfortable with walking.
	So Kyra and Oscar have an announcement to make.
	Let's see what that is.
	Next video.
	Here we go.
	I'm feeling it too, dude.
	Are you going to cry?
	No.
	Are you going to cry?
	No.
	I might.
	I'm just kidding.
	Dude, turn up the speaker outside here.
	I can't hear shit.
	I'll do it.
	I'll do it.
	I got this.
	I got it.
	It's fine.
	So, as many of you guys have noticed, we have gone some time without uploading.
	We kind of were uploading like a little here, like sprinkles of uploads in the beginning of December.
	And then we kind of stopped and haven't posted since.
	So this is new.
	It's like January 15th or so.
	In our life.
	I mean, we've been sick forever, on and off, it feels like.
	And then personal things, family things, and obviously what we are telling you now.
	That's the main thing.
	Yeah.
	It's hard to get on camera and act like nothing is going on in the back.
	But at the same time, it's also hard to get on camera and say anything because what if we end up being fine and then like we just shared all that and then it just seems rocky and trashy.
	So it's just hard to know in that situation from a content point of view what to do.
	And so we made the decision just to kind of not do anything.
	Actually, we did try.
	I tried a lot to vlog, but it was just we were going through a lot of emotions and a lot of sad, at least I was going through a lot of sad emotions.
	A lot of you guys didn't notice he was vlogging and I wasn't.
	At that time though, we were...
	I was...
	Let me just interrupt them here.
	What was the problem?
	Was it the vlogging?
	I'm sure vlogging doesn't help to show those intimate moments, to get all that attention.
	She's obviously a little mentally imbalanced and getting this relentless attention and accolades has made her think that she's somebody special.
	And women don't do well with fame.
	They don't do well with power.
	They're new to it.
	We've had fame and power for many years, but especially power.
	But women, being thrust into the spotlight like that, they tend to overreact.
	And so she's decided she's too big for this marriage.
	And I, like, it wasn't really that bad between us at that point.
	For me, I was going through it at that point.
	Like, I saw it coming early because I just saw the switch.
	So for me, I was going through it, but I was still in the denial phase.
	Like, no, this can't be happening.
	Yeah.
	Can't be happening.
	But sadly, it is, and it happened, you guys.
	I'm laughing because it's awkward.
	We're here.
	Yeah, we're here.
	So, like, I finally accepted it, which is why I'm actually even able to laugh about it.
	It feels nice.
	We actually just made this video before.
	That's the problem right there.
	So there's a couple problems.
	Vlogging is the least of it, I think.
	Another big problem is getting engaged, having kids, and not being married.
	You need to get married, guys.
	When you're just, and people go, why do I need that piece of paper?
	I don't know.
	It's just more consequential to have that piece of paper.
	Breaking up is not as easy when you're a married couple.
	Also, the actual marriage and the ceremony, it says not just to everyone there, but it says to you, it says to each other, this is serious now.
	We're in it for the long haul till death do us part.
	Without the actual ceremony, even if it's just at City Hall, without the actual ceremony, you're just engaged.
	You're just floating around.
	You're just buddies.
	You're just best friends, as they keep repeating.
	So that's another much bigger problem.
	Let's give that 30%.
	I'm going to give the fact that they're vlogging 20%.
	But 50% at least of this problem is whatever these guys are, Gen Z, millennials.
	Their whole like, everything's okay, man.
	It's cool.
	No, it's not cool.
	Not everything can be worked out.
	It sounds like I'm saying that they shouldn't be married, but I'm saying not everything is groovy.
	Like, get mad.
	No, we're not breaking up.
	No, it's not going to be cool.
	He ends up living in the basement.
	And they're committed to being best friends.
	By saying that everything is groovy and everything's cool, you're making the breakup really easy to do.
	Like, what's the difference now?
	She gets to fuck dudes.
	He gets to fuck chicks.
	Well, they haven't actually tried that, but they're aware.
	They're now okay with the concept.
	No.
	But it was very rough.
	It was too fresh.
	Yeah, way too fresh.
	And I still was not fully accepting it.
	But I'm better now.
	So yeah, I'm better now.
	Kira broke up with me.
	Does it make you feel better to say it like that?
	Do you feel better because it's not you?
	Oh, yeah, because I tried my ass off to make it work in the end.
	But that's the thing, guys.
	If you're listening, in the end doesn't always work anymore.
	But I don't want to also make it seem like the thing is, okay, not that we need to get into this, but Oscar and I have been together for a very long time.
	We started our relationship as best friends, and I'm only giving you my point of view, not yours.
	But, you know, we've been best friends for so, so long.
	And I would say we genuinely have stayed best friends the whole time.
	By the way, you'll notice in this discussion, the kids come up zero times.
	And that is always the way with these fucking cunts.
	The kids are not mentioned.
	It's all about me and what I'm going through and my feelings.
	Fuck you.
	Point in my mind where I felt like, are we just best friends?
	Like, I feel like that's.
	You fucked him at least four times.
	Is there more to it than that?
	You know?
	And there has been more to it than that.
	But at this point in our lives, I don't feel like there is more to it than that.
	And nothing happened that's like crazy and dramatic.
	Nobody like cheated.
	Nobody like.
	Feelings were hurt though.
	You did some things that hurt my feelings, but I found out later on, like a month later, that it's because you were holding these feelings inside and kind of resenting me.
	But can you please clarify that I wasn't cheating?
	Because you were like, we'll dig into it.
	You did a lot of things that bothered me.
	I wouldn't consider them full-blown cheating, but it was definitely lying.
	Alright, alright, fine, fine.
	What about that situation that bothers you?
	It's not that situation.
	I just feel like once we sit here and start naming like specific things, like do we want to talk about when I had mental health issues, you were not there for me?
	Like we don't need to like dig into all that.
	Yeah, you're right.
	And I do think something like this, it's like this.
	No, you're not right.
	Like what happened?
	She said, I need help.
	And he went, no.
	Bullshit.
	She's not happy with the way he reacted.
	They're teen parents.
	She had a baby when she was 19.
	Sorry if I'm not a qualified psychiatrist when you're feeling bipolar.
	You're a self-indulgent, nutty bitch.
	And you just obliterated not just your life and his life, but four little babies' lives.
	One of them just learned to walk and you're like, I'm going through a rough patch.
	It's over.
	The fuck?
	Keep it to yourself.
	Like, can you not be miserable for a year?
	Can you not be unhappy for a moment?
	Can you not be dissatisfied?
	That's part of life.
	You don't fucking turf.
	You don't nuclear war your fucking family because you're going through a rough patch.
	You stupid cow.
	Look what the...
	And this is what I hate.
	Someone does damage like this.
	Like, if a guy did this and was like, I'm done with this relationship.
	I know I have four babies, but I want to get involved in biker gangs.
	So I'm joining the Hells Angels.
	The guy would be a villain beyond belief.
	But because we have this stupid, I'm okay, you're okay, okay, baby vernacular, it's very ironic that their brand is called okay baby because the babies are not okay.
	The fact that we have this vernacular means you can get away with this shit, this child abuse.
	What she's doing is child abuse.
	Mark my words.
	And it's disgusting that he's sitting there and letting her do it.
	No, we're not breaking up.
	No, you're not sabotaging the kids.
	You want to go stay at your mother's for a couple weeks and gather your head?
	Okay, that's negotiable.
	It's a lot of work for me to deal with four kids, but whatever.
	But no, throwing everything in the toilet because you had a bad week?
	No.
	Just I didn't know better.
	I didn't, like, I didn't understand these things.
	Like, I clearly am understanding them now.
	Going through my own, like, sadness and hard points, you know?
	Yeah.
	The thing is, it takes two in a relationship.
	And Oscar is not like, yes, there are things he has done to hurt me or made us stripped apart or like all the things, right?
	But so have I. And I think the biggest thing is I do know, this is where for me I knew that it wasn't something I wanted to like hold on to anymore.
	I knew when I, in my head, was thinking of Oscar being happy with somebody else and that made me happier, that's when I knew I didn't want to be with you anymore.
	Because if you were in love with somebody like that, because I do love him and I will love him for the rest of my life.
	I mean, not just because he's the father of my kids.
	Like I genuinely get along with Oscar.
	We have so much fun together.
	Like all of that.
	But she's just a moody bitch.
	She's saying something crazy.
	I don't know if it's PMS or what it is.
	Ignore it.
	Smile and move on.
	They're talking like they're a donut shop and they've decided to slow down on the donuts and start actually selling pizzas too.
	Because the donuts only seem popular earlier in the day and they want to start getting night customers.
	So they're getting pizzas.
	And if that was the case, you go, I get it.
	You're trying to make money as a restaurant and there's a lot of drunk college kids who coming at night.
	They don't feel like donuts.
	You know what?
	Let's do it.
	Let's do it.
	I mean, it's been a long time we've been doing donuts, but I understand.
	This is not switching to pizza, bitch.
	You with somebody else and that's what I want for you.
	I don't think you're in love with that person.
	Not that weak.
	Don't you think?
	I don't know.
	I've never heard that side, so it's a lot to take in right now.
	I don't know, I guess.
	So, like, in a way, that's like even loving.
	I don't.
	Like, I can't meet your adrenaline standards.
	I don't like the things that you like.
	I don't want the same things that you want.
	I'm not interested in the same things that you are.
	Stop.
	I cannot meet your adrenaline standards.
	So apparently this guy's willing to snowboarding and stuff.
	Your wife doesn't have to be into snowboarding if you're into snowboarding.
	Half the time when guys have a hobby like fishing or hunting, they don't want their wife coming.
	And this is something Naomi Schaefer-Riley pointed out a long time ago.
	She's a writer at the Post.
	You're not looking for a soulmate.
	My wife doesn't have to like hardcore and 1970s British punk.
	I'm not even sure I want her to.
	Those are my things.
	Like right now, I'm organizing all my screws and various bolts and nails and shit and putting them in this little case I have that organizes all the different bolts.
	It's fucking fun.
	I love doing it.
	It's a big job because I've got thousands of them because I'm cheap and I don't throw away any screws.
	I don't want my wife helping me with that.
	So part of this stupid divorce, even though they didn't even have time to get married, is that I can't be your soulmate.
	I don't know who told you that your mate has to be your fucking best friend.
	That's retarded.
	Stop.
	We need sexual chemistry.
	We need to both get along with each other.
	We need to be good for the kids.
	You have that.
	You don't have to go snowboarding with them every 10 minutes.
	And I want you to have that with somebody.
	So why am I like selfishly hanging on?
	With a million other reasons.
	Like, guys, There's a lot that's like the main point of this is there's so many combined things and it really was like a slow point getting up to here It wasn't that's what I mean by it wasn't like one thing So what triggered you to be so mean though this last month not that she was four but she was actually She was actually very nice to me during the like actual breakup process,
	but there was a phase where like I was trying my once I had decided that I didn't want to be with Oscar anymore.
	get mad Throw things.
	Be emotional.
	Just don't make other people suffer the consequences in that don't make major decisions like I'm emotional, so we're getting divorced.
	But the best thing you can do in these situations is get it all out of your system and scream and yell and throw things.
	Instead of coming up with solutions like, we're done, the kids now have two parents.
	And they're going to come up with this dumb idea to co-parent.
	I've seen that a million times.
	I'll live across the street.
	Then they start fucking other people and then everything shatters.
	Slowly over time, or like, we just aren't having fun together anymore.
	Just like we're just Ryan, who the blah, blah, blah, come fix me.
	He's got like an Australian vibe, but he's American.
	His wife's a doctor.
	Joe.
	Oh, Joe Mataris.
	Joe Matarisse.
	I remember him telling me, oh, man, I used to lose my temper really bad.
	And then my wife, she's a doctor.
	Yeah, we know.
	You told us 100 times.
	And she helped me get over it with medication.
	And I go, why did you take medication?
	What's the matter with getting mad?
	I just bawled out Shen Yun.
	And he goes, no, it was getting bad.
	I'd like punch a car.
	Yeah?
	Good.
	My dad used to throw cars like the Hulk.
	The fuck's the matter with that?
	Hey, but I hadn't gotten mad at all up until.
	This is about emasculating men.
	Same with all the Proud Boys' hatred.
	Same with Antifa's entire agenda.
	If you read Antifa, like the Antifa Handbook, it's really a war on masculinity.
	That entire handbook is all attacking masculine traits, which is daddy issues ultimately.
	So what you're seeing here is a war on man, and he's lying down and taking it because he's so fucking young.
	And he loves her so much that he's like, all right, let's do it your way.
	You want me to lie down on the ground like a floor mat and walk all over me?
	Okay.
	And then she walks all over him and goes, what are you doing lying down there like a fucking floor mat?
	Remember when things were going downhill?
	No, you get mad.
	Just because it's not your anger, it's extreme.
	Oh, yeah, we all fight.
	Everyone fights and argues.
	Yes, I did explode a few times, guys, and I've worked on it.
	I've actually gotten way better.
	I don't work on it.
	The years.
	He has gotten better at it, but this is like not the point.
	This is the thing about this video that I hate is it's like you did, I did.
	Like, yeah, we both did.
	That's why we're sitting there.
	No, you did, bitch.
	All this poor bastard's done is been your human punching bag.
	Like, it's so hard because making this video, I want to sit here and just tell you guys, this is what's happening.
	I'm sad.
	I'm crying.
	Cry, motherfuckers.
	There's four kids on the line.
	Shit, I cry when I watch ELF and they have enough Christmas spirit to get the thing going up again.
	You can't cry about the apocalypse.
	Your kids are going to cry.
	Trust me.
	You're going to be sad.
	I'm sorry that we haven't made a video about it for a minute.
	But also, all that's in the back of my mind is how will people take what I just said?
	How are people going to take what you just said?
	And that's so frustrating because I feel like I'm not taking it very well, my dear.
	I don't really want to make this video.
	Yeah, and it makes it sound like we're fighting all the time, which we honestly don't.
	We don't, yeah, no.
	It's in that, again, like all of these things I just said over the last year.
	That was not a daily thing.
	That was like a once a month type of thing or like two times a month.
	And not even fighting, but just the like little things, you know?
	Or like, oh, you want to argue and I'm not into that.
	Yeah, yeah.
	Just all, all, yeah, all of everything you just said was like, I don't know, it happened sporadically throughout.
	But I do think that late number of people.
	In other words, it's not relevant.
	It's not a big deal.
	Started getting really bad.
	It's not worth steamrolling your children and turning them into little fucking cardboard cutouts of themselves dead on the ground.
	We were fighting and we were not able to even be in the same room at one point, you know?
	So yeah, towards the end, it did get really bad.
	But I feel like, long story short, I do feel like we're in a really good place right now.
	We're still...
	I hate that word.
	You're in a shitty place right now.
	You're in a divorced place.
	Go tell the kids.
	Say mommy and daddy are, well, right now, mommy and daddy are under the delusion that it's going to work for them to live together with daddy in the basement.
	But then they're going to get horny and fuck someone.
	And then they're going to move out.
	And you're going to see daddy about 50% less, maybe even 60%, 70% less than you are now.
	So we're taking your dad away from you, basically.
	Definitely diluting his presence by a major amount.
	Got any tears yet, folks?
	Has reality sunk in?
	I mean, this is like...
	We're figuring it out.
	We have a whole life together.
	We've been together for seven years.
	It takes a minute to like know what we're going to do and stuff.
	I hope, I just, yeah, I think as long as we keep doing what we're doing, she's been extremely respectful of the breakup process.
	Nobody else, like, gets it top.
	Can you believe that sentence?
	She's been extremely respectful of the breakup process.
	Nigger, she's dumping you.
	You're getting turfed and your children are going to suffer.
	That's not extremely respectful.
	Fuck me.
	Like she said, no one else has been involved.
	There was no cheating, no nothing.
	Currently, no one's dating, nothing.
	Like, we're all just, we're both, I mean, just trying to, like, figure it out and be as respectful as possible.
	And I think that's going to help keep our friendship.
	I think it's a good idea.
	Fuck your friendship.
	Why are you preserving friendship?
	You're a couple in love that made four children with that love.
	You're shaping those lives.
	You shouldn't have vlogged it.
	That was stupid.
	But this is much bigger.
	Letting this dumb bitch's stupid, irrelevant, emotional whims destroy everyone's life, including her own, by the way.
	She's her own worst enemy.
	You silly cunt.
	Main goal that I think we both have this as a goal, because we keep talking about it every day, is like, Oscar was and is, has always been my best friend.
	And I hope it can remain that way.
	Even if right now I'm just going to be a little rocky, but a little bit rocky.
	It's going to be a little rocky going from this bucolic, beautiful, loving, young, energetic relationship with four cherubs to two people deluding themselves and pretending that their lives aren't being flushed on the toilet.
	That's going to be a little rocky, just a dancers.
	For us, my stomach is growling.
	I hope that for us, but I also hope that for our kids.
	But I feel like a lot of times, even you guys are like, well, the kids, the kids, and it's like outside of the kids, because that stuff I'm not worried about with you and I. I know we will be the best parents that we can be through this.
	Stop.
	We'll be the best parents that we can be through this, so I'm not worried about the kids.
	What if the best parents you can be is not good enough?
	Which is the pattern throughout history, by the by, which is why the Western world is falling apart.
	The death of the family, which is why BLM supports the dismantling of the nuclear family, because they're globalists and they want to destroy America, destroy the West.
	Remember the mantra, folks?
	No borders, no wall, no USA at all.
	They don't want a different place where everyone is understanding and really respectful.
	They want to build back better.
	And to build back better, first you have to destroy everything that is presently there.
	You can't build back better if there's a fucking building in the way.
	Burn it down, boys.
	Or ladies, I should say.
	But between us, I also would like to keep things as like positive.
	Yeah.
	As positive as possible.
	Why did you look like that?
	No, I'm just thinking.
	She's thinking, I'm fucked up about the future too, like how it's going to go.
	We're still going to be vlogging and uploading on this channel together.
	We still are going to live in the same house.
	We still are sharing finances.
	We're going to bring taxes together.
	We're going to keep our money together until we tax us and figure out like, all right, what direction do we go from there?
	We're just like, this is the direction you go when you let this bitch sabotage everything.
	And because you're wimps and you're young, you can't take that bitter pill.
	So you're taking tiny bites and going, we're still going to vlog.
	We're still going to share bank accounts.
	And then he's like, yeah, for now.
	I mean, he's getting a little more realistic than she is.
	She thinks everything's going to be great, but he's going to live in the basement.
	Anything.
	We're trying not to do it.
	Does he snore?
	Is that the issue?
	I don't know.
	Maybe we'll be vlogging separately.
	Oscar is sleeping in another room.
	Yeah, that's interesting.
	But I just got back from vacation, so it's actually not that bad.
	It just feels like, all right, I'm continuing the vacation.
	Vacation.
	That's what it is.
	Take a holiday.
	First night in the new room.
	Yeah, downstairs.
	Is it weird?
	No, not at all.
	Like I said, I've been waking up new places the last like, what has it been?
	Three, four weeks?
	Just trying to distract you.
	Who takes a month-long vacation?
	This might be the issue, too.
	Is like this vlogging and this constantly not working has rotted their brains.
	Yeah.
	I thought we weren't dating.
	No, I mean like at my mom's house or at the same time.
	Can I tell you about the funniest conversation I had with you?
	What?
	In Florida when we were on the phone.
	Oh, yeah.
	I mean, I guess, whatever.
	Oscar was, he went to a strip club.
	Can I say that?
	Yeah, okay.
	The night before.
	And then we were talking about it.
	And I was like, well, did you like get a lap dance or anything?
	And he's like, no, no, I feel too awkward.
	So anyways, long story short.
	I didn't go alone, but.
	Like, first of all, he has to say, I didn't go alone.
	Then he must make sure he didn't get a lap dance.
	It's none of your business.
	I went to a strip club.
	Okay?
	Fuck you.
	And if anyone at home is watching this and these wives have a problem with their husband going to a strip club, you're silly.
	You're ridiculous.
	Shut up and mind your own business.
	Okay?
	That's not weird.
	It might be a sin for some really upstight, uptight Christians.
	But if your wife is jealous of you at a strip club, or even vice versa, women can go to strip clubs.
	It's even less sexual in that sense when it's women watching man.
	They're laughing their heads off the whole time.
	Can we grow up, please, a little bit?
	Can we be adults?
	A very weird part is coming up, folks.
	I went with a group of friends.
	Anyways, Tascar went to the strip club.
	Didn't get a lap dance.
	Stupid.
	Didn't Venmo mean just as much money as the stripper must have?
	Okay, didn't get a lap dance.
	Stupid.
	So that confirms what I'm saying, is she's mad at him for being a doormat.
	She wants him to fuck around.
	And not fuck around, but like be a man and get a lap dance and get into trouble and fucking flirt.
	But that sentence was the craziest sentence I've heard in a long time.
	Not Venmo me the same amount of money he spent on her.
	What?
	What did I just hear?
	What the fuck is that?
	Is that a thing?
	First of all, it's ostensibly your wife.
	I mean, you're not married, but you just told us you share finances.
	So I've sometimes joked to my wife, like, I'll pay you 20 bucks to go do that, but she can just take 20 bucks out of our bank account whenever she wants.
	Who, what couple has to Venmo the other person?
	What?
	What the fuck?
	What?
	What?
	Does that sound weird to you, Ryan, as a young person?
	I'm just thinking, I'm like, this is me, but like with Taco Bell.
	She'd be like, so he went to Taco Bell, but he didn't buy a chalupa.
	He could have Venmo'd me the same amount of money he spent at Taco Bell.
	But he got cheesy Fiesta potatoes because they're only and you're like, yeah, sorry, so stupid.
	It won't happen again.
	I did have a coup hub, though.
	Oh, God.
	It's true.
	Do anything but shirt.
	John, you barely didn't, and how much it was.
	You sound like an idiot.
	You sound like an idiot.
	Just like in all these cuck commercials, too.
	This is the culture we're living in now.
	My husband's an idiot.
	My parents had pretty big fights, and they would get physical sometimes.
	I couldn't imagine my mom calling my dad an idiot.
	I couldn't imagine my grandmother calling my grandfather an idiot.
	Like, she's called him a fucking asshole.
	I've even heard them say, why did I marry you?
	Why the fuck did you marry?
	No, why did you marry me?
	Why the fuck did I marry you?
	That was the worst I ever heard.
	But my mom calling my dad, or even vice versa, my dad wouldn't call her an idiot.
	He'd say, och, Lorraine, you've got no idea what you're talking about.
	But he never said, you're an idiot, Lorraine, you fucking idiot.
	It was only 200 bucks.
	Only?
	What kind of money are you making?
	Not any because you're not uploading.
	You got $200, Lorraine.
	I just found out I was single, okay?
	I wanted to feel like a bottle.
	You didn't even get a lap dance, though.
	Okay, anyways.
	Robert, go back.
	So then he was talking about sleeping with girls and how is he going to do that?
	And I was trying to give him advice on how to sleep with.
	He got a lap dance, by the way.
	Yeah, but he's just...
	Yeah, but he's just...
	And he knows in his eyes, he's like, you fucking bitch.
	He knows it, but he can't say it because that's what he said.
	He wanted to fuck me because I had Coke.
	I should have fucked her.
	No, I don't think he has the balls to get a lap dance or get Coke or fuck anyone.
	Dude, I think he did, but he's not going to admit it because that's more fuel for her.
	That's more in her arsenal.
	I'm not confident in him.
	Girls are like, no, when a girl wants to, and I'll.
	Oh, my God.
	And it was the funniest, weirdest conversation.
	Not that I was even trying to get any, but she was telling me, like, hey, I think you should sleep with someone.
	Like, what?
	First of all, I wouldn't even want to go about this.
	I think that, like, I don't know, guys, I feel like they just like need that.
	Like, Oscar and I haven't slept together in some time.
	It's been like a month, yeah.
	Two months.
	Almost, yeah.
	It's going to be there.
	You're away with your family, so I understand you're not banging like crazy.
	And you got four kids, so you're probably exhausted at the end of the day.
	Is that what this is about?
	There's not enough fucking?
	You think he skeeve him out or something?
	Because he's not fucking you enough?
	Whatever this is, it's irrelevant, and they've made it the biggest thing in the world.
	They are treating their lives like he's had an affair, he is a pedophile, he murdered someone.
	That's the level of consequence we're dealing with here.
	He's going to prison.
	But no, it's just a whim.
	We haven't fucked in two months.
	No pressure.
	Dude, that's too much.
	TMI.
	Anywho, she was telling me you need to get it somebody.
	I was like, I wouldn't even know how to go about that.
	And she just started giving me tips.
	Anyways.
	Oh, my God.
	So that's where my ring went.
	And I get to keep the ring because a ring is a gift.
	And if he thinks he could take it away from me, he would be without the penis.
	I actually hope you keep it for the clothes.
	Wait, what would happen?
	He would be without a place.
	He would be without the penis.
	I actually hope you keep without a penis.
	She'd cut his dick off.
	He's an idiot that I'm going to castrate.
	I'm going to cut his fucking dick off.
	Castrate.
	For the gold.
	Yeah, I want to wake it.
	I think you give it to your son.
	No, I don't want any of the kids to wear the ring or give the ring because I think that's bad luck.
	Because the kids are babies, bitch.
	It's not a high priority right now.
	We didn't give it to you.
	When we're ever got married, hey.
	It still is bad luck.
	So, no, I'm not letting them give it to him.
	Wait, wait.
	Did he just say, but if we got married?
	If we had got married?
	Oh, so he did want to get married?
	Or if we got married?
	Hey.
	Wait, go back.
	Give the ring because I think that's bad luck.
	Because we didn't.
	It's still his bad married luck.
	Got married?
	I couldn't really understand.
	Or if we got married, hey.
	Can't tell if he said, if we had got married or if we get married.
	Either way, it shows that.
	Yeah, but that's his fault.
	She was like, I'm not ready.
	Let's not do it.
	I want to have money.
	They always say that.
	I want to have more money.
	So I want to make sure that we can have a big wedding I've always wanted.
	Okay, then have a shitty wedding and have your big wedding later.
	You got to get the wedding out of the way.
	You need to get married.
	And if she says no, she doesn't mean no.
	No doesn't mean no.
	Sorry.
	So, no, I'm not letting them give it to anybody, but I would like them to just at least like see it or have it or decide what they want to do with it.
	I like how her ownership of the ring is the only time she has any sense of loyalty and commitment and honor is when it comes to gifts she's been given.
	Yeah, a gift is a gift.
	It's bad luck to cut your dick off if you fuck with any of my gifts.
	If you want to fuck with my marriage, go nuts.
	Go fuck my husband.
	I don't give a shit.
	Break it into four pieces.
	What happens if I have a fifth kid, though?
	That's your new guy.
	If I. Now listen, he says that's your new guys.
	That's a person's problem, not mine, dude.
	You having a kid with someone.
	People always say to me, they go, if you got divorced, would you be able to be friends with your wife's new husband?
	And I'm like, why would I be friends with two people at the bottom of the East River?
	What am I going to do?
	Get on scuba gear and go down there and start going?
	No.
	Your new person's problem, not mine, dude.
	For me, your new person, dude.
	Don't call your wife dude.
	Be, like I said, like, probably the same for a little bit.
	We don't know.
	We don't know.
	We don't know, guys.
	We're just like here, just living our best class.
	Dude, we're just two friends living in the same house with four kids.
	What could go wrong?
	Right?
	Oh, God.
	Everything?
	Yeah, I guess a lot of things.
	But I'm sure that I'm really point cunt.
	So leave your question quick.
	Okay, so that's enough of that.
	So I've explained to you what's going on here, right?
	Let's see the next video.
	What's their life like since the breakup?
	Good morning, guys.
	Good morning.
	Check it out.
	This is my new sleeping arrangement.
	And honestly, with everything going on, I've been loving the change of environment.
	Plus, it is so much quieter down here, so it's way easier to sleep.
	In fact, it's been a little too easy.
	I was supposed to wake up with the kids today, and I already hear that they are alive.
	So let's go make sure they haven't caused too much trouble.
	Oh, you're in an unfinished basement.
	I would feel rude if I had a guest stay down there.
	Good morning.
	Not the patriarch of the family.
	Of course I can help you.
	How are you doing today, beautiful?
	Good, but I'm kind of sick of cameras, Dad.
	Good morning, guys.
	What's up?
	Levi's chilling.
	The baby's already out of your bed.
	Did the baby get dressed up?
	Hi, monkeys.
	Wow, though, you guys, my kids are clearly grown up because check it out.
	The house is actually still really clean.
	Good job, guys.
	This is when it's bad to have a positive attitude.
	Hey, I'm divorced.
	I'm living in my own unfinished basement.
	She's having me look after the kids, and it's awesome.
	Dude, he's got like about to snap energy.
	Yeah.
	It really is like before a psychotic break.
	I'm about to snap.
	I'm about to break.
	One step closer to the edge.
	I'm about to.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, Lee was at that age.
	He's obsessed with games.
	And you know what?
	Every boy goes through it, so I'm going to let him go through it.
	I'm not obsessed with games.
	I'm obsessed with robot games.
	That's a good sign.
	Thank you, Wise.
	Thanks for specifying, dude.
	Thanks.
	In case you're wondering, I am on Kid Duty today.
	For those of you who may not know, because you don't follow my Instagram, I've been in Florida the last week, so I got a couple days to make up for it.
	Not sure how Kiera and I are going to split kid days, but for now, this is what we're doing, huh?
	And Daddy's back, and he's more ready than ever to hang out with you guys.
	It's been too long.
	Camera's high quality.
	Ooh, I know you probably shouldn't, but I think you'll be fine if you do.
	Yeah.
	Ooh, good job.
	Is that enough?
	There you go.
	All right, let's put it away now.
	Good girl.
	Young people make great parents.
	They're so much more patient than us.
	That's my girl.
	And open-minded and energetic.
	That's why it's good to have kids young.
	Of course, you don't want to have kids with a lunatic if you're a pussy.
	Not a great combo.
	You were worse than when we were in a relationship.
	So don't really want to find out right now.
	I'm trying to keep the peace, huh?
	Let's keep the peace.
	Are you trying to feed me?
	Okay, so that's enough of that video.
	And now, let's check out what they did the other day.
	The title of this is, this isn't a date, but it was still fun.
	What did she say in the breakup?
	I can't be your adrenaline junkie.
	I don't share your adrenaline rush.
	Basically, I don't want to go snowboarding with you.
	I don't like snowboarding.
	And what does she come up with?
	Hey, let's go snowboarding.
	You know what this means?
	I'm a stupid bitch.
	Don't listen to me.
	Make me go snowboarding with you.
	Stop being a doormat.
	Everything up to slap me around is really what she's saying here.
	Metaphorically slap me around.
	Keep me in check.
	Maybe she would like the odd slap.
	I don't know.
	Good morning.
	Check out where I'm at and you won't believe who's with me.
	Hello there, stranger.
	How you been?
	Oh my God.
	I've been so good.
	I'm like going through a manic episode or something, but it's fine.
	She's stressing out right now, which is crazy because we're out here, obviously, on the mountain, getting ready to snowboard.
	What does he see?
	What we're doing, where we are.
	So she's stressing out.
	By the way, you know what I noticed?
	I looked for his Instagram.
	So he can plug the Instagram with a little picture, but it's not in the description.
	It's only Kyrie.
	Hers.
	Yeah.
	That's hilarious.
	Which, I mean, it's okay if a woman is domineering.
	You just don't allow it.
	Like, a woman can want to make it impossible for you to advertise your Instagram.
	You just say no.
	Just say no.
	When women say no, it doesn't mean no.
	When men say no, it should mean no.
	Over her own idea.
	Well, it would sound like a good idea until there was a mountain in front of me and I'm like, I don't know.
	Remember the touching of the face thing?
	I did bring her to a smaller mountain and there is a lot of people.
	We saw that with the lesbian teacher who kept saying, I misgendered someone, you guys.
	It's like a form of insecurity and self-obsession.
	It's like a security blanket on your face.
	Can I just say a side note?
	It's getting to the point in my life with all these transitions and changes that when somebody looks at us when we're vlogging, I just want to shove their head into the snow.
	Ooh, me.
	That's your negativity showing.
	Let's put that away.
	Anywho, let's get ready.
	It's getting cold and we gotta get dressed up to go riding.
	Oh, by the way.
	Last year he started shredding it.
	I'm hoping he cares about the kids.
	Yeah, my mommy and daddy are back together again because my daddy finally stopped listening to this stupid bitch and all her ridiculous whims.
	And she finally realized that the crazy shit she comes up with makes absolutely no sense and she doesn't even mean it herself.
	There's a lesson for you here, ladies and gentlemen.
	Ladies are erratic and they're not good at power, so don't give them the reins.
	Don't let ladies drive the boat or your boat will crash.
	You're the captain.
	Keep it on course.
	Hell yeah.
	Well, that ate up a lot of time, didn't it?
	Sure did.
	But the reason I did that is because it affects us all.
	It affects you in your silly little dating relationship.
	As a young person, it affects you in your old marriage.
	And for us old-timers, like 67-year-olds, it affects you in that these are what your children, your grandchildren are doing.
	And they're laughing as they get dumped and their children get abused.
	Abused.
	I shouldn't get abused, Scene.
	All right, let's do the mailbag.
	Hell yeah.
	Ryan, shut up, you don't have a dad.
	Let's turn our eyes to Gavin's mailbag.
	Let me touch it.
	Now, I know you guys are still wondering about my hemorrhoid and how things are going, and I appreciate that.
	But I was using some old Preparation H that I found in the kid's drawer from literally years ago.
	And then I went to CBS and I bought new shit.
	And it could be psychosomatic, but I feel like this new cream is more effective.
	I think the old Prep H may have expired.
	And I used to not believe in that whole idea of medication expiring.
	It sounded like bullshit.
	But maybe it is true.
	Or maybe it's because my Roid is now, you know, not as intense as it was on Monday because it's Tuesday.
	I should probably take a picture of it and show everyone.
	No, that's fine.
	Unturned Stone Alert.
	I was looking for this tweet about Patton Oswalt.
	Pretty weird that Patton Oswalt would apologize for being friends with Dave Chappelle, but wouldn't apologize for murdering his wife.
	Allegedly.
	Watch.
	Apache engage insurgents hiding in a building with two Hellfire missiles.
	We are being warned here that you may ejaculate.
	So, gentlemen, if you can get into your bathroom or your wife, the bathroom your wife uses, and get always with wings and wrap them around the front of Your penis in a conical shape like a Klansman, and then you can watch this.
	Wow, we've got a thing in a thing in the fire from inside the window over that building.
	Make sure you can identify where the techniques are looking.
	Rogers, we're gonna be inbound here with 30 bike mics.
	This is my only concern with the Uyghurs, is they're not doing this good of a job.
	I didn't get it.
	You shoot a machine gun and then everything blows up.
	Is each bullet a bomb?
	Am I stupid?
	It's like the shooting propane pants?
	Yeah, Roger.
	I'd appreciate if you put a hellfire directly in that same building that they were taking contact from.
	It blowed up real good.
	Remember that from SCTV?
	No, you're too young.
	So it's called the Hellfire.
	Does it like shoot out and give him a big hug, maybe?
	Okay, blow them up.
	I hate to say it's boring watching people being incinerated, but let's get to the blowing up part.
	Fuck.
	There we go.
	Finally.
	That took you so long to kill those wiggers.
	Okay, uneventful, sir.
	Sir Gavilot and the Gruel Eater.
	This was one of Ryan's biggest failures, being completely unemotive while Gavin delivered the funniest concept ever.
	Believe me, I've been there, folks, but let's see another example of Ryan failing miserably.
	So she goes, I was joking around saying, what if you die and you go to heaven and Jesus is there and you don't know what to say?
	This is the son of God.
	You're freaked out and you go, hi.
	And then he goes, hello.
	So we thought that was funny.
	And then my daughter goes, wouldn't it be funny if he was just the weirdest looking dude you've ever seen?
	Like he didn't look like any of the pictures.
	He had little eyes.
	Like little small eyes, little dot eyes.
	Sort of like you'll see in the video tonight, the Austin guy who has a black wife and he got shot, killed for starting a fight with an AK in his hand.
	An AR-15, sorry.
	So he's got little pin eyes, but really big eyelashes.
	And his head is kind of light bulb shaped, like it's really big in the top.
	And he has a weird, creepy voice, like, hi, how are you?
	No, no, not that much, but just like, hey, how are you?
	And he has tiny hands, the littlest hands you've ever seen.
	And you're in heaven.
	It's awesome, by the way.
	You're flying around.
	Everyone's cool.
	And they go, so you've met the Messiah?
	And you go, yeah.
	I love it here, by the way.
	I love it here.
	But is anyone a little sketched out by Jesus?
	And they all go, you mean the best guy ever in the history of the world?
	And you go, yeah, I guess.
	I just find him a tiny bit creepy.
	Why aren't you laughing?
	You don't think that's a funny idea?
	I can't laugh at our Lord.
	No, I'm with it.
	I'm not LOLing, but it is funny.
	It's a funny concept.
	Well, it's all in the production and how you make him.
	Right, right.
	Let me down again.
	I just.
	It's hard to laugh at Jesus.
	You say Jesus Christ is a swear word all the time.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	I got to stop that.
	That's nice.
	So you're just a liar.
	You just constantly lie.
	I don't say he looks weird or anything.
	We didn't say he looks weird.
	I think the fact that people all over the world, Jews included, say Jesus Christ when something happens or they bump their toe or something, it just shows his universal monumentaltude.
	Shut up, Jesus.
	Oh, there, I just said it.
	You just said it.
	Someone sent us a book called The Aristocracy of Talent, How Meritocracy Made the Modern World by Adrian Woolridge.
	This unique and fascinating history explains why the blame now being piled on meritocracy for many social ills is misplaced and that assigning responsibilities to the people best able to discharge them really is better than the time-honored customs of corruption,
	patronage, nepotism, and hereditary castes.
	Woolridge upends many common assumptions and provides an indispensable backstory to this fraught and pressing issue.
	Oh, so he's saying, he's not saying that aristocrats are talented.
	He's saying that talent is an aristocracy in and of itself, and we should support that above everything else.
	Way to copy me, dude.
	It came out in 2021.
	What a gip.
	Oh, Jesus H. There I did it again.
	I did it again.
	Is this the nitty?
	Hey, Gavinator, just wanted you to check out the comments under this CNN tweet about the Pope criticizing people who opt to be pet parents instead of actual parents.
	I was surprised to see the sheer volume of defensive comments.
	Well, it's also Twitter, right?
	These people are sick.
	They are brainwashed into collapsing our civilization.
	They literally cheer for our nation's destruction and only act defensive of anything when someone criticizes their self-indulgence, overconsumption, or POC pets.
	So this quote that the Pope said totally went over everyone's head, including Ricky Gervais.
	All he said was, he wasn't saying don't have pets.
	He was saying, don't have pets instead of kids.
	Oh, yeah, look at all the money you make.
	By the way, Mr. Krabs is one of the saddest, non-dynamic characters.
	He's to be pitied in the show.
	So proving the opposite point.
	Can someone who does not want kids explain their desire to have kids to me?
	Can someone who does not want kids...
	Or a cute cat.
	Look at that.
	You could have a fucking cat.
	Oh, great.
	Look at this sentence.
	Can someone who does not want kids explain their desire to have kids to me?
	Well, obviously you don't desire to have kids if you're someone who doesn't want to have kids.
	I personally have never felt once a desire to procreate.
	I'd be really interested, blah, blah, blah.
	I didn't want kids, then I had one, still don't want them, but she needs a sibling, so I'm thinking about having another one for her.
	Also been told I'm good at being a mom and pregnancy was easy for me, so it couldn't hurt to have just one more.
	These people sound like droids.
	I'd highly discourage you from that line of thinking.
	What happens if pregnancy number two and baby two aren't as easy as the first?
	I'm an only child that would have hated having a sibling.
	Why?
	As long as they have a social network, blah, blah, blah.
	Don't wear yourself out for something that will come naturally.
	Nobody needs a sibling.
	I needed a sibling.
	I finally got one when I was 14.
	Way too late.
	Rolling on the floor laughing.
	No.
	Humanity has lost its mind.
	Our world is on fire.
	And you want us to bring kids into this world?
	For what?
	For them to watch it burn with little hope of a future?
	Not having children is quite the opposite of selfish.
	Sparing them suffering they don't deserve.
	That person's name, by the way, is Get Vaccinated.
	Sick.
	Yeah, this whole like, don't bring kids into the world, it's a horrible world.
	We have homeless kids in the Philippines.
	Churches don't care about these kids.
	Really?
	Why is it then that Christians and religious people donate so much more to charity than atheists?
	Why is it right-wing groups are so much more generous when it comes to charity than left-wing groups?
	Blah, blah, blah.
	Get your rosaries off my ovaries.
	Yeah, everyone took this as an attack on pets.
	When does the bunny start talking at what age?
	And start walking around.
	How many people have told you?
	You know, having a dog is, for me, it's like having a kid.
	I got to make sure they're healthy.
	Now, what school are they going to go to?
	Are you worried that one of them might be gay?
	This guy says, nah, I think we're good.
	Meanwhile, Elon Musk, he's a smarty pants.
	Okay, so you think we're good.
	So we're at $7.9 billion.
	So you don't want to add to that because that would be too many?
	So what percentage is, say, two or three of 7.9 billion?
	It's pretty small.
	There's a lot of zeros to that right.
	And by the way, it's quality, not quantity.
	Here in the West, we're not breeding.
	Yes, third world countries are breeding, but they're not birthing their best.
	Boy, that's a very racist and misogynist and xenophobic episode.
	This popped in my DMs.
	Is it Sam Harris or Sam Tripoli?
	He's got a fucking Gavo Stikorino.
	Who's Sam Tripoli again?
	Get back.
	It's Sam Triple?
	I'm sure he'd be insulted if he knew I said that.
	You know what's exciting?
	Tomorrow, Matt Walsh is going to be on Dr. Phil.
	Wow.
	Yeah.
	With a bunch of fucking trannies on.
	Sam Triple.
	Sam Triple.
	I know him.
	He's a stand-up comedian.
	He does some conspiracy stuff, works very closely with Brian Callan, he's got there.
	Eric Shafir.
	Eddie Bravo.
	Okay, get me on your show then, Sam.
	If you love me so much.
	Yeah.
	Give me some attention.
	Stop being selfish, bear.
	Give Nazis a voice.
	A platform.
	That's the thing.
	I don't give Nazis a platform.
	To dance.
	Teenage jobs, Scav.
	I don't recall you mentioning this recently, but maybe you can talk about the major decline in teenage jobs available.
	When I was a kid, I had to have a job by 16.
	That was my dad's rule.
	And 16 was probably elderly in terms of workforce in my dad's eyes.
	Fast forward to when my kids became teenagers.
	As each of my kids turned 16, it became increasingly difficult for them to find a place that would hire them before they turned 18.
	Retail was one of the desired places to work because they could get discounted rates on clothing and shoes.
	But no, you had to be 18 to apply.
	Yeah, I tried to get my daughter a job at the gap, and they said you had to be like, I can't remember, 19 or something.
	You're just selling pants.
	Here's another reason that teenagers are having a hard time finding employment.
	Immigration, yes.
	Whether it be leap.
	But why are the places making it so hard for young people?
	You know what I mean?
	Like, why doesn't the gap say 14, 15, 16?
	My daughter got a job last summer when she was 14.
	But yeah, we got to get these kids jobs.
	We are in the thick of it in Southern California next to the Mexican borders.
	Immigrants are taking teenage jobs, making careers out of those stepping stone jobs and pushing for higher wages.
	Yeah, that's another good point.
	I never thought of.
	When you're 17 and you're cleaning pools and mowing lawns, you don't really complain that you're making $40 a day.
	If you're a Mexican father of five, that's not enough to pay the bills.
	So you start bitching.
	They always say that Mexicans come in here and they do the jobs Americans want to.
	And then my retort used to be, well, they do the jobs Americans want to for five bucks an hour.
	But I've been to Home Depot.
	I've talked to the illegals there.
	They will not look at you.
	They will not get in the van for under 20 bucks an hour.
	Gavin on yoga pants.
	Gavin in this episode of GML from three years ago, you reel against some fat ass and complain her labia is in your face.
	Do you still have the same opinions on yoga pants?
	I happen to agree.
	They're hoey, and just because they're socially accepted doesn't mean they should be the only thing in women's closets.
	Ryan skipped a 1015.
	I'm on Spotify.
	Way too big for her body.
	Of course she's wearing yoga pants, so I can see her labia.
	Oh, these are a free thing.
	But I'm even getting a little tired of seeing you naked with just different colored legs.
	Like it's, there's nothing not nude about you except the color.
	I can see your labia.
	I can see your butt crack.
	I can see every contour.
	The only thing I can't see are cellulite and zits.
	I like more things I don't want to see.
	But it's a woman walking around nude.
	Yeah.
	So sometimes it's like, think of it as lingerie.
	Sometimes I want to see women walking around in lingerie.
	But it's not a good want to have.
	I'm sure some have already made this observation, but when you type in OK on an iPhone, the supposed white-powered dog whistle is suggested as an emoji substitute.
	Yeah, when I typed it out the other day and mine was black.
	I don't remember setting it to black, but maybe I did.
	It seems like an accidental tell that the outrage over that gesture is all bullshit.
	Not only does the emoji exist, but they're acknowledging that it just means okay.
	Yeah, good point.
	It'd be great if my sidekick could pull up this image at some point this century.
	There we go.
	I love these kind of things, by the way.
	These little tells.
	Like that dumb rapper who was on a show and they say, why don't you wear a mask?
	And he goes, because you can smell a fart in a mask.
	And if you can smell a fart, it doesn't work.
	And everyone went, what a moron.
	Rapper thinks COVID transmitted by farts.
	Yeah.
	No, he's right.
	And here's the other thing about farts, too.
	When you fart, a lot of us are wearing jeans, right?
	So it goes through your cotton Haines underpants.
	Oh, by the way, someone was asking us what underpants they should buy.
	I recommend these.
	Just your basic Hanes.
	You got to yell a little more.
	What?
	You got to talk a little louder because the...
	Oh.
	Yeah, just basic Haines.
	That's what men wear.
	I like briefs, too.
	And at the gym, you know what I wear?
	I look like John Travolta in Greece when he's running around the track.
	I just have Chucks on, gray shorts, white t-shirt.
	That's the way it should be.
	The way Phys Ed was in the 50s.
	I've been getting into these.
	Yeah, that's gay.
	They're stupid.
	But I do it on purpose.
	It's the most treacherous type of pants a man could wear.
	Who are you doing it to?
	Your wife?
	Just to me, just so I know that there's like something really tacky happening under my clothes.
	Why would you put hide?
	Why would you have something just an inside joke with you and your underpants?
	It's just like so tacky and like hood.
	I used to say that you come up with excuses and you can't take blame.
	Now I just think you're a liar.
	Well, I bought them for you.
	You lie all the time.
	You might be lying to yourself, but this is a lie.
	Then why do I wear them?
	What's your...
	You think they look kind of cool?
	No, they don't.
	It's like it's representative of trash hip-hop culture.
	But I just think it's funny.
	It's just funny.
	And they're very comfortable.
	I bought you a pair.
	Oh, and they're very comfortable.
	I wouldn't wear them if they're not comfortable.
	Who wears a joke if it's not comfortable?
	Like if it's going to not be comfortable.
	But I bought you a pair of the beer ones.
	And I was like, let me see what these are about.
	They're still in the rack.
	They're good.
	But I think, like, the guys in my gym, they wear these fucking tights now.
	Leggings are not just for ladies anymore.
	And I said to the owner privately later, I go, the fuck's with all these fucking tights?
	Like, combat pattern tights?
	Are you embarrassed of your leg hairs?
	Are you cold?
	Well, then, why are you wearing a sleeveless tank top if you're cold?
	And he goes, yeah, I don't know.
	I don't like it either.
	He goes, I think it started with fucking football.
	Football players started wearing them, and now everyone has to wear them.
	It looks so gay in every sense of the word.
	Oh, that was funny, too, with that Josh Whedon guy.
	He's talking about that black guy, Ray Finish.
	What was his name?
	Fisher?
	And he goes, the guy was just a bad actor in both senses of the word.
	That's the way you got to handle this shit, people.
	Fight back like Barstool Sports Dude did when he got his Me Too moment.
	He said, my lawyers told me not to do this, but fuck it.
	Here's what happened.
	She's a bitch.
	I hated her.
	She slept on the couch.
	The other girl's lying.
	And the other girl doesn't even exist.
	You'll notice that died, by the way.
	Oh, I sent a letter to Stanford U, who did that Proud Boys thing.
	Do you remember that?
	Yep.
	So that arrived yesterday.
	Including Elizabeth Yates, who is Radical and Disengagement, RAD, researcher at the University of Maryland.
	Dr. Elizabeth Yates, she looks like she's about 25, is a senior researcher on the domestic radicalization team at START.
	She works primarily on the suite of data sets associated with PIRIS, and that is profiles of individual radicalization in the United States, and BIAS, which is an acronym, BIAS Incidents and Actor Study, with a special focus,
	they always have this special focus, on far-right violence, extremism, and hate crimes.
	So the beauty of saying far-right violence is they don't have to examine blacks or Muslims behaving badly.
	They can focus on whites and not break any rules.
	So she got a letter yesterday.
	And if there's any Proud Boys out there, I'm going to start attacking these people.
	So don't send me an article from like a year ago where they called Proud Boys white supremacists or something.
	Have you pulled up the study yet?
	No, what's that?
	What do you mean, what's that?
	I'm confused on what to look up here.
	Elizabeth Yates?
	The Stanford study, Proud Boys Crimes, start.umd.
	The study is called Proud Boys Crimes and Characteristics.
	Yep.
	So if something new comes out, because you've got to remember when attacking these people and demanding a retraction, when they publish an article that says Proud Boys Have Ties to White Nationalism, 98% of the people who read that are reading it within the first hour or two it's published.
	And then you get a retraction that 2% of the people see.
	Not as Effective.
	You got to get these guys the second it happens.
	In fact, the letter should be pre-written, and then you can just sub in the quote and the publication.
	All right.
	So you got that up yet?
	Did you pull it up?
	I can't find it now.
	Hold on.
	Holy fuck, Ryan.
	We really got to get my computer on this thing.
	It's really simple.
	Start.umd.edu.
	Research brief.
	Proud boys, crimes, and characteristics.
	You're killing the show.
	You're putting me in a bad mood.
	There we go.
	Now, what's amazing about this is if you go down to criminal charge, you see murder, attempted murder, two.
	What the fuck are you talking about?
	There it is.
	Murder, attempted murder, two.
	And then they have pre-planned violence.
	Wait, maybe they're talking about...
	The only two I could think of is Tiny being attempted murdered and then the Jay Bishop getting shot.
	Right.
	So that is a Proud Boys-related death in that a Proud Boy was next to him as he was shot in the fucking head by Antifa.
	But she talks about planned violence.
	Let me see if I can dig that up.
	Pre-med.
	Yeah.
	Characteristics of the crimes.
	This is on page one.
	Proud boy's defendants plotted eight premeditated violent attacks, two of which were successful.
	It's right at the top there, Ryan.
	Characteristics of the crimes go down.
	There.
	It's the last bullet point.
	No, the first bullet point.
	Eight premeditated violent attacks.
	The fuck?
	So you're saying, and this is great for my case, because it's one thing to say on a talk show, I think they premeditate attacks.
	It's like, oh, people are just shooting the shit.
	This is a data chart with pie charts.
	So when you call someone a white supremacist and it's surrounded by pie charts, it has a much different impact.
	And to say they premeditated violent attacks?
	What are you talking about, Elizabeth Yates?
	God, I wanted to call her so bad.
	But that's not how the law, smart law works.
	You don't run down there and fuck all those cows.
	How does the joke go in the Sopranos?
	The two bulls are at the top of the hill, and the father, the son bull says to his father, let's run down there and fuck one of those cows.
	And the bull says, calm down.
	Let's walk down there and fuck all of them.
	Hey, Gavroyd and Nurse Ryan, check out this video.
	You could have done it.
	You had to swing like Joe D. 250.
	He does a whole lot of money.
	I told you that.
	Anyway, check this video out.
	I can't believe this adult has a driver's license, much less any responsibilities in Congress.
	Love and kisses.
	Why do we have so many female fans?
	Half these letters have been from Broads.
	Don't they know was sexist?
	The fuck?
	Won't one of you bitches dump me?
	There is no reason to repeat bad history, says Eleanor Holmes Norton, a former ACLU assistant legal director.
	Whoa!
	What a pedigree.
	You used to be an assistant legal director?
	Wow, what did you do?
	Pull some files out for your boss?
	Repeat bald history, maybe?
	There's a typo.
	So what is this video?
	Let's click the top link first.
	And it is.
	Oh, they're the same link.
	Speaker Pelosi, seriously considering this person serve as the chairwoman of the Transportation Committee.
	That is fucking amazing.
	This should have been the final video.
	So that's her.
	She shouldn't have a driver's license.
	Just get out and let the man drive.
	I don't think he has room to get in.
	Yeah, she just goes out back and then closes the door.
	There we go.
	That's kind of an old...
	I think I remember seeing this a long time ago.
	Jan 17th?
	No, it's new.
	What a pathetic imbecile.
	And your parking says a lot about you, doesn't it?
	She doesn't even get the concept of diagonal parking.
	Did you show it?
	Yeah.
	She doesn't get the concept.
	She just goes, there's a space.
	I should be perpendicular.
	All right, let's get to the final vid.
	Now, every red-blooded American male wants to knock someone out.
	If you are a piece of shit, then you go knock out an old lady, an old man, an old Asian, shove them down the stairs.
	No, that's not how the instinct works, my friend.
	The compulsion to want to knock someone out is to knock out a bad man.
	Someone hurting a kid or raping a woman.
	That's where the compulsion comes from.
	So if you act on it by beating up some old Asian lady, you're a retard.
	However, if there are two drunks trashing your restaurant, Perfect opportunity, and here's the best thing about drunks.
	They knock out really easy.
	You don't need the perfect punch.
	Their bodies are already dying to go to sleep.
	So all you have to do is just hit them on the button and wish them good night.
	So these guys are...
	And the beauty of this scene too is not only are they trashing the restaurant, but they're taking advantage of young women.
	Asian women in this case.
	And being good at it, if you will.
	Win-win.
	That could have done serious, expensive damage.
	Broke a window, that's $1,500.
	Women are scared.
	She doesn't know what to do.
	He's coming at her, attacking her.
	Big, huge guy is just letting all this happen.
	By the way, who's the asshole filming?
	Get involved there, cameraman.
	So this guy finally shows up.
	He throws him down.
	That was nice and easy.
	Then he starts choking him.
	Just kind of go.
	Then the big guy comes along and gets him off.
	He goes, fuck off, both of you, fuck off.
	And then he's about to knock out the first guy.
	He's a beautiful little bump.
	So he's getting swatted in the head.
	Get out of jail free card here.
	Puts down his watch or whatever.
	Boom, and he's out.
	Boom, and the other guy's out.
	And then he chokes him out and throws him over there.
	Get him again.
	You have a human punching bag.
	Try out some new moves.
	Even that little shitty uppercut knocked him out.
	Try out some crazy moves.
	Do a fucking roundhouse kick.
	He gets him again.
	Great.
	Now, you know what I say, of course, in these instances?
	Time to give the ribs a once over.
	Go up and down each side, breaking all their ribs.
	Get the big guy.
	This part frustrates me.
	Get the big guy again right now.
	Perfect opportunity.
	This guy is severely concussed.
	And get up, get up, get up.
	No, I can't.
	Violence doesn't feel good.
	Justified violence feels good.
	I'd be jizzing right now if I was that other guy.
	That's so fucking funny.
	So true.
	He's got to hold them up.
	Get killed.
	Get fired.
	Get in trouble.
	Be brave.
	And never stop fighting.
	We drift all his flats.
	We took them around the back.
	We can.
	No.
	No, it's not.
	Yes, yes, yes, no, no, no, no, no.

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