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May 28, 2021 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes
45:21
GOML LIVE #100 - CHOCOLATE CHOCOLATE CHIP (Part 1)

The media asked Biden what kind of ice cream and promptly orgasm when he tells them. Also, Felonious Floyd protecting the bird that is the bald eagle and the horrible whiteness of "rugged individualism."

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Time Text
Live from New York, it's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McInnes. it's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McInnes.
Something's telling me I must go home.
I must go home.
And the lights all went out in Massachusetts.
The day I left her standing on her own.
I'm sorry.
Do you recognize this ensemble?
Animal House.
Yes.
I remember seeing that speech and thinking, that's what I want to be.
I want to lead some sort of a movement where we're mad as hell and we're not going to take it anymore.
- However, we'll speak on behalf of Delta House. - Thank you. - But you know what I ended up being in the Proud Boys?
That guy.
I ended up being the... Guys, calm down!
Calm down!
Stop doing that!
No, don't make that joke, that's too spicy!
No, that's enough Pepes!
I think we've heard enough, Mr. Chairman.
I was told I'd have a chance to... That's enough!
This is them putting Max and John in prison for four years.
He said that!
Yes!
Are you deaf?
Let's finish this damn thing.
And then they took over, and then I had to step down from the club.
I don't think it's fair!
That's what I said on my way out.
And then they threw all my friends in jail, and the SPLC destroyed my reputation.
And girls thought it was hot.
Hey, shut up, you assholes!
Mr. President, do we have to live like this?
And then Enrique took over.
Don't screw around.
They're serious this time.
Stop going to rallies.
They're serious this time.
Don't go to January 6th.
And don't bring a clip.
Don't worry, man.
I can talk to the cops.
I'm friends with a lot of them.
No, it doesn't matter.
The cops don't have any control.
Took a few liberties with our female party guests.
We did.
Well, you can't hold a whole fraternity responsible for the behavior of a few sick, perverted individuals.
For if you do, then shouldn't we blame the whole fraternity system?
And if the whole fraternity system is guilty, then isn't this an indictment of our educational institutions in general?
I put it to you, Greg, isn't this an indictment of our entire American society?
Well, you can do what you want to us, but we're not going to sit here and listen to you bad mouth the United States of America!
Gentlemen!
That's the cowboys.
I just realized he had a knit tie.
Yeah, I could be more authentic.
So, back when Need of Fashions, and this will be our Need of Fashions plug, info at needoffashions.com, correct?
Mm-hmm.
Back when they would come and visit hotel rooms, they'd come to New York City, and I showed them that clip, and I said, I need that suit.
And they found the swatch, and I found the tie, and they made this pink shirt, and we put it together.
Info at NinaFashions.com.
So what you do now with them, they're not coming to your town anymore, or maybe they will in a few months, but as of right now you contact them, they get on a Zoom call with you, and you do all your measurements.
They get your body perfect.
And then it's, the prices are amazing.
You can get a dirt cheap shirt.
When I say dirt cheap, I mean like 60, 70 bucks.
Oh, I can get them at fucking Walmart for, go fuck yourself.
Or you can get a very expensive suit.
Now, the problem with a tailored suit in New York, they're like five grand.
Six, seven grand sometimes because tailors are rare, but tailors are not rare in Hong Kong.
So what these guys will do, they can get you a suit for like a thousand bucks.
So anyway, negotiate, discuss prices first and what your range is.
And then you can get all these shirts that fit you so perfectly.
You have no idea how perfectly comfortable I am right now.
There is no like, you know, the neck thing where you, you start, you can feel your Adam's apple rub on the top button.
And you're like, I'm not going to have a panic attack.
I feel like I'm being choked out.
I don't right now.
Right now I feel like I'm wearing a sweatshirt and I'm wearing a suit.
Oh, and you know what's cool?
You get your name in it.
Mine says Gavin McInnes because that's my name.
But you get your name.
And you choose this fabric and everything.
It's fun!
So yes, that's our new sponsor, Need of Fashions.
Go to info at needoffashions.com Got it?
Needafashions.com, we made it clear enough?
So yeah, you go there, they'll measure you on the Zoom, and then you can start talking about what you wanna get.
And then once they have you in the book, you just call them up and you pick some shirts online and say, send me three more shirts.
A thin one for summer and a thick one for winter.
But there's also one other thing with that.
There's a promo code?
Oh yeah, I became obese.
After I mean, I've been going to them for 10 years.
And I'm also I prefer the term ripped.
I've become bigger.
And for some reason, I guess my waist is more muscular.
Because it's bigger now.
I have a more muscular waist.
That's not a good outfit.
Oh, I was wearing that same shirt today.
Oh, baseball game.
You know how much those shirts, those shorts cost me?
How much?
$350.
What the hell?
It's one of the dumbest things I've done.
It's right after I left Vice and I had a big check and I was at some fancy surf store and I thought oh I'll just get these and I put them down and they're like made in Amsterdam or some shit and the guy goes $350 and the only time in my life I've ever done this and I've never done it since I went oh.
Instead of going like what the fuck you out of your mind and just put them back I went oh.
And just paid.
I've done that a lot, yeah.
So stupid.
Those don't fit me anymore.
So anyway, I call them up and I go, dude, what am I going to do now?
My waist is like two sizes bigger.
And they go, no problem, Mr. McInnes.
Your pants all have an inch and a half extra sewn in.
I didn't notice that.
So send them back to us and we'll expand them and send them back for your charge.
And now all my suits fit like PJs again.
That's the guy.
That's the son.
Anyway, Nina Fashions is great.
The reason I chose that opening song, though, in Massachusetts, because I just watched this new Bee Gees doc that's going around.
Have you heard about this?
Before I saw this talk, I was like, yeah, yeah, I know the Bee Gees, like, disco band.
They got a lot of flack when everyone hated disco, and they did the Saturday Night Fever soundtrack, and I heard they were kind of more rock before that.
They had a whole bunch of songs that were kind of heavy.
There's like 37 Bee Gees.
Not guys, but versions of the band.
What?
Sort of like Van Halen, when they were little kids, they would play parties and weddings and stuff.
Like Eddie Van Halen and Alex Van Halen would go with their dad and he'd play the piano.
Right.
And they'd go do weddings, anything, funerals, conga, polka, whatever you want, which is a crucial part of the puzzle.
Because you get to the point where you're just so fucking good at music that you can churn it out in an afternoon.
I also think a massive part of this is innate talent.
And what the Van Halens did and the Bee Gees did is they combined their innate talent with Malcolm Gladwell's thousands hour minimum.
What a fucking band!
Look up how many hits the Bee Gees have.
I believe it's 347,000.
So they had that, so they had like a Beatles thing.
They were basically the Beatles in the 60s.
They came up with the Beatles.
Girls screaming their heads off, all that.
Then there's a lull.
Then there's the psychedelic guys, because everyone's doing that.
And they rode all these different waves.
And then they keep dying, right?
Of course, that's what happens in pop music.
You're huge and you die.
Momus, my buddy Momus, the EDM guy, his solution to that problem is he just moves.
To different parts of the world.
So when I met him, he was living in Japan, having a whole new career there as a dance electronic music guy in Japan.
The Bee Gees didn't do that.
Well, they did move from Australia to Britain, to America, but they would just keep reinventing themselves.
How many hits did, just type in, Ryan.
Hits.
No.
Somebody said.
You type into Google, how many hits did the Bee Gees have?
Question mark.
I have done that, sadly.
And what did it say?
It basically told me to fuck myself and look at Wikipedia.
And I was like, all right, well, I'm not scrolling through that, but I found an article.
No, no.
You wrote how many hits Bee Gees and you made Bee Gees one word.
It's two words and have.
How many hits Bee Gees have?
How many hits did the Bee Gees have?
You've got to really spoon feed these youngsters.
43 hot top 100 hits for the group.
How many?
43?
Yeah, first of 43 hot.
No, I saw something in this article here that said how many hits they had.
Okay.
Well, you can tell us when you're ready.
Stop killing the momentum of the show.
So then their careers sort of waning and they go, we need something at the end of this song like, yeah, going away.
Like, as the song's fading away.
And Barry Gibb, I forget the hunkiest one, just goes, "'Cause you gotta know, nah!" I can't do it, obviously, with my voice.
But he does this falsetto thing.
And everyone goes, that sounds cool!
And they go, we've always been influenced by those sort of doo-wop bands with the high voice, with the falsetto.
And then they said, well, why don't you do that?
Start now.
So then they become the falsetto band.
They've already had, like, four careers.
Then they do the falsetto thing.
There we go.
Bee Gees rank third among groups for most hot 100 number one hits.
34 song chart appearances.
What is that Bee Gees rank third?
Clicked it.
It is loading.
It's loading?
Are we having a slow internet night again?
I believe that is the truth.
That's what's happening here.
Look at those singles.
Five in the UK.
19 in UK top 10.
These are all UK ones.
Yeah, huh?
So that's not interesting to me, Ryan.
I already want to kill you.
This is the rank third thing?
That's still... This is art.
That was loading that whole fucking time?
We're not off to a good start.
I spent 33 weeks in the chart.
We're still learning stuff about the Bee Gees.
Okay.
How deep is your love, of course?
Yeah, yeah.
I don't want to know that.
I want to... So it's like 34 or something.
But that was Britain.
Now I'm getting mad.
Keep scrolling down.
20.
So who are the other two guys?
What kind of headline is that?
It's got to be in the opening paragraph.
Go to the opening paragraph.
The trio blah blah blah.
One in a group in history.
Deep as you love.
Say for the Beatles and the Supremes.
The Supremes?
Yeah.
The Supremes?
The Supremes are number two?
What do they have?
A bunch of gay love songs?
Actually gay, yeah.
The Supremes?
What do you got?
Let me see some of them.
Baby Love, Back in My Arms Again, Come See About Me.
Everybody's favorite love is like an itching in my heart.
Oh that one I can never get play that song Okay, fuck is love is like an itching in my heart.
That's gross.
By the way.
It sounds like you have you didn't wipe your heart well enough You have jock heart Never heard this hit before Anyway, and then disco happens and everyone hates them so they're depressed and And everyone just hated them because that was the thing.
I remember, I was around then in the 70s, and we would wear shirts that said, Death Before Disco.
And I was like, seven.
And my babysitter goes, do you, uh, you hate disco?
I go, yeah, I'd rather fucking die.
And then she plays like Heart of Glass by Blondie and she goes, what do you think of this song?
I go, it's awesome.
Who's this?
She goes, it's disco.
And it was like I had been raped.
My babysitter raped me.
That was a man you just banned.
Look, that's a whole Bee Gees there.
They were huge then.
Look, they're signing autographs when they're like fucking 12.
I remember being grossed out the first time I saw the Bee Gees.
My aunt was listening to them like a concert on the TV and I was like, who are they?
They're ugly as fuck.
And my aunt was like, those are the Bee Gees.
They were one of the greatest bands ever.
That's their failed musician dad.
And their mom was also a dad apparently.
My two dads.
How can you mend a broken heart?
Yeah, it's really good, worth a watch.
Although, they had a younger brother who came along later and he also had 8 million hits, but he OD'd, I think, Coke.
I think he coked himself to death, which is a challenge, but they don't really touch on that.
It's sort of like watching a Queen documentary.
They don't mention that Freddie Mercury was a fag, which they did in the Queen documentary.
They just sort of show him, or not documentary, movie.
With Remad Zimby or whatever.
They just show him go into a room and it's implied.
But like his gayness was pretty huge.
I mean he did bring opera to the masses.
That's not normal for straight men.
It's easy to overdose on coke if you get it from Brooklyn lately though.
There's been fentanyl with it.
This was not during fentanyl days believe it or not.
Pre-fentanyl Bee Gees.
So then, wait, I'm telling this story all wrong.
And then disco, so disco's bad and everyone hated them just because they were popular, just like me when I was a kid.
I just, that's what you do.
And then they go, let's become songwriters.
They have another fucking career.
Writing songs for Barbra Streisand.
I don't know if your 30 hits there were included songs they wrote that people didn't know they wrote.
It's amazing, and you're watching it, and you're like, I could be a songwriter, probably because I drink, so I watch these movies with liquid courage, and I'm like, I could probably, yeah, I'd be like, hey, hey, we gotta get out of here, guys, let's run away to the party, oh no, that's not gonna, hey, it's a party Saturday, boys, look out for your friends over there.
No, that's not working.
It's like I was watching Joe Frazier and Muhammad Ali because it's the anniversary of someone's death or maybe Joe Frazier just died or something and I'm like oh I never noticed this but Joe Frazier has does a Larry Burns thing where he's always going low and Muhammad Ali just can't get him.
And Muhammad Ali had all this length on him.
So Fraser went, I'm not going to go toe-to-toe with this guy.
He'll knock me out.
So I'll just go low and I'll be like a little groundhog, like Larry Barnes.
And then my drunken, not drunken, but you know, buzzed self goes, that's going to be my shit.
I'm going to become like a Barnes-Fraser guy.
And I'll always be going low underneath the arms.
Then today I was at the gym, like, after three bobs and weaves going, I gotta sit down, this is exhausting.
So.
The you you are at night is not accurate.
Which brings us to Tactical Walls.
This episode of Get Off My Lawn is brought to you by Tactical Walls.
They made us that cool shelf.
We cannot say enough about this vet owned, awesome fucking company.
And you guys send me pictures of your gun racks, and I'm like, why don't you use Tactical Walls?
You have like stupid guitar hooks and stuff like for holding a guitar or you just have it on some cheap shelf.
If you're spending that kind of money on a gun, why not have a cool Kingsman-esque.
Remember the movie The Kingsman where they show all the guns?
Kingsman-esque.
Look at that issue box.
That's such a great name for your guns.
Now, you can also use it for your sports equipment, your bike, your tools.
This thing, look at that, eight pages.
Pages and pages.
Pages and pages of awesome products, but their main focus is these tactical walls where you have your guns.
If any shit goes down, you want to be able to just have them there where you can yank them off the wall, especially if you're in a state where you don't have to hide them in a safe.
Look at that setup.
What's he got to say? - This is me again, Tim with Tactical Walls, and I wanna show you our new mod wall system here behind us.
Behind us, behind me.
You're over there, I'm over here, it says behind me, in front of you.
But here we are. - I think that's the guy I talked to.
I thought he was a lot older.
- Harry's a lot older. - And your computer screens streaming at you. - I'm older than him. - At warp speed or dial up speed, depending on where you are and who your carrier is.
Here's some mod wall panels we've got set up here on this wall.
Mod wall is designed to work on a standard two by four wall, but just to show you how versatile it is, you can put it on brick.
So what we did was put up some furring strips on the brick, and then we installed the mod wall through the furring strips, and we've got two panels here.
You've got a seam right here in the middle.
The cool thing about our mod wall system is it's expandable vertically.
This guy can build anything, including a statue of me and Ryan.
Daisy chained these suckers together to have a full wall if you want from floor to ceiling or from wall to wall or floor to ceiling and wall to wall which would be your entire wall.
That'd be a pretty cool system.
It'd be cool to have like a... He's a very likable guy, isn't he?
Alright, that's enough.
A booby trap wall.
That'd be fucking dope.
Yeah, like you have a shelf where it shows like, guns here.
And then you go to open it and two giant bolts shoot out through your chest.
That's like with Bob Odenkirk where he goes, we were home invaded twice.
If you're home invaded once, then it's going to have a thing where you break this panel and 17 cinder blocks covered in AIDS fall on your head and kill you.
You turn into Kevin McAllister.
Yeah, Kevin McCallister meets Rambo.
So if you sneak in my back door, a giant fucking branch goes shunk through your thighs.
You wouldn't be like, again with the home invasions?
This is becoming a pattern!
Yeah, there's no fucking way.
Bullshit, Bob Odenkirk, you fucking liar who made an awesome movie where you change the races.
I'm gonna put on the AC for a second.
Tell me if it bothers you.
Any bothering going on?
No, not me.
Okay.
And people have written in and said not.
So yeah, TacticalWalls.com.
Check it out.
Support vets.
Support American businesses.
So we got Need of Fashions.
We got Tactical Walls.
We covered the opening song.
Oh, I meant to say this last show, but I'll say it now.
But I'm talking to you here on a human level.
That is a very human level.
I guess we'll start with the important news.
DJ Khaled cannot say the word circumstances.
Circumstances.
Circumstances.
It's an easy word.
What's the word?
Circumstance.
There's some words I can't say.
Circumstance.
But she can't say it either.
They had, what's her name there from, uh, uh, you know, the Fergie?
Fergie.
Yeah.
That looked like Fergie.
But she, she tries to say it cool and rap because everyone thinks DJ Khaled's black.
He's a Palestinian.
You don't have to talk black to him.
Relax.
Circumstance.
Circumstance.
Like she's bad too.
Circum.
There's some words I can't say.
Circum.
I don't want to get my son circumstanced.
I'm against circumstances.
Yeah, we'll get it next time.
He's uncircumstized.
You did a great job.
Do you have words you can't say?
I always have a problem with the abominable snowman.
Abominable.
I keep thinking there's an extra B in there.
Abominable.
You know, I don't know.
Basically anything smart.
Yeah, full sentences.
I know a word you have trouble with.
Everything.
Correct.
Yeah.
Speaking of which, I was at the Fag Zone earlier today and I just thought you guys should see how it's progressed over the years with the show.
He's been listening to a lot of Jordan Peterson and he's decided to clean his room and the way he's cleaning it is with several meters deep of laundry.
Turn it up. - The video showing the boy's room, it's just atrocious and also says the word nigger 47 times.
- Yeah, so the first video that you took, I decided to drop a certain word a certain amount of times to make it-- - Yeah, he said the N word 14 times so I wouldn't ever show it on the show, and that's what he's referencing the second time.
I think he denied the Holocaust and said a bunch of other things, hoping I wouldn't post it.
Just the worst things.
I actually didn't post it, but I caught him again.
So, you know, you can pause that at home and just have a look at the squalor this man lives in.
Go back.
I have 50 years of clothes, sort of.
Well, not 50, but I've been around.
I've lived in New York for 20 years, so I should have 20 years of clothes cycled through.
You have enough clothes.
Like, let's go to the corner there where the guitar is.
No, no, the other way.
The other entire way.
Yeah, like all that.
That's a lot of clothes.
And it's not like you're always wearing a different fun outfit.
That's true.
That's true.
So why not?
You told me like weeks ago you were going to get a contractor bag and just throw it all out.
That's true.
You know what I've noticed is a lot of those are seasonal clothes.
Like see that?
The plaid there like everything plaid flannel.
This is all winter and and fall clothes, right?
So there's a bunch of outfit.
There's like four months worth of outfits that I cannot wear during the season.
You know, and that's kind of rough.
But if I, you know what I should do?
Yeah, no one else has that scenario.
But they usually have like a... Everyone else has a winter room, a summer room, and a spring and fall room.
Right.
For their various walk-in closets.
Correct.
And so you, that's you explaining with the clothes.
What about the other disgusting clutter?
Like look at the desk underneath the video game.
Right.
No, underneath the video game.
Like, what is all that fucking garbage?
It's too fuzzy, but... Oh, there we go.
It's kinda good.
There's, uh... Just mail and shit.
Mail.
A cowboy hat.
Like, I think I gave you that trunk.
Underneath.
Yeah, yeah.
Oh no, wait, I gave you a trunk, and I go, you could just put your socks and underwear in here, and then you moved the trunk out and added two more boxes of clothes.
Right.
Anyway, pathetic.
Um, I wanna have a little Canada news.
Oh shit, I forgot to number these, dude.
He's not cleaning- I do, uh, Crying Jordan Peterson pretty well now.
Okay, let's hear it.
Oh, I closed the video, shit.
He's...
He's not cleaning his room properly.
And it makes me sad.
It really makes me upset.
He does the look up thing to try not to cry, but he does.
Why is he such a crybaby?
He's an emotional guy.
I feel him.
Early in the mornings, if I hear like a sad song, I'm liable to have a lip quiver.
Oh, I had a little cry today.
Oh yeah?
I saw on the Fox News Instagram, it was someone went to pick up her cake for her son.
And the cake was paid for and it had a card with it and it said, I paid for your cake.
My son, my son died at 30.
This would have been his fifth birthday in heaven.
Oh my God.
Um, go down.
Maybe it's, I thought it was Fox News.
Maybe it wasn't.
I could look.
There it is.
Oh, okay.
Gotcha.
The picture here.
What?
It's a picture.
Of course it's a picture, shit for brains.
We're looking at Instagram.
Yeah, they have videos that, like, with a little piano music, I literally picture... Today is my son's 35th birthday, his 5th, one in heaven.
In his memory, I've paid for your cake.
Please enjoy, make special memories, and hug your children and loved ones tight.
My son loved cake.
And I started to well up with tears, thinking about that gesture.
And then I thought, wait a minute, my son loved cake?
Did he weigh 650 pounds?
I think it's just a little levity.
Did he die of obesity?
That makes me less sad.
This is you trying to like not be sad.
I just when I saw the loved with two underlines my eyes dried up immediately And I was like, oh you had diabetes because you overindulged yourself Speaking of overindulging in Vancouver, I have a little bit of Canada news.
On Vancouver Island, this is not the first Canada news, the second one, a junkie finally took a shit after, you know how they get constipated.
Of course.
And so they had to, the sanitation group had to It didn't fit in the toilet, obviously, so they took it to the ocean in a truck and just sort of rolled it out to sea and hoped it would find its way.
It's one of those where it was so massive that it broke.
Yeah, yeah.
The other half is in the next picture.
That's the other half that was on a different one.
So there's two different pictures.
But the locals were furious because they're rolling into the ocean and they realize that the fish are gonna eat it and then every time you eat fish locally you're eating this fat junkies shit.
Every fish you eat is poo for fish.
See this is a hard joke to do in the suburbs because they don't know that junkies take a shit once every two weeks.
And I miss that.
I miss being able to make junkie jokes.
You know when we were at the Tommy Robinson trial in Britain, someone threw a junkie shit at us?
Wow.
It hit the ground and rolled to the side, and it was... This big.
No.
Yeah.
That might have been bear shit, dude.
What?
Bear shit?
Do you know what bear shit looks like?
Is it little... turds?
Oh, I can't show any of these pictures.
No.
Bear shit just looks like someone poured pancake batter into it.
Anyway, it looked like a brown tornado, like someone took an entire tub of ice cream and just played with it for a bit, and it hit the ground.
It was all Tommy Robinson fans, so there must have been some Antifa person just hurling it from really far away.
Wow.
And no one knew what it was, but I did.
Growing up in Montreal, I know what junkies look like.
And the fun thing about it is you could see, like, that was Monday.
Tuesday was, like, there was all the different shades.
It was like a little calendar.
And then one of the soccer hooligan type of skels of a chick just sort of kicked it aside.
Is he going to eat that?
Sure is.
Now, a lot of people think this is chocolate.
It is not.
Chocolate does not occur naturally in the forest.
This is actually beskat.
But the great thing about this is when you open it up, you dry heave.
Turn it up.
Try and get one out of here.
That looks like a cliff bar.
It's actually not digested.
So the bear's obviously eating a lot of nuts, a lot of fruit, and not all of it gets absorbed.
You're nuts and you're a fruit.
And actually if you're desperate, that could actually be a food source.
All you need to do... Is wash it?
Is wash this off.
Get all the bacteria and the fecal matter off it.
No thanks.
I'd keep looking.
Eat some of that grass behind you.
Imagine like he approaches it like Gordon Ramsay, where he goes to the bears like, This shit isn't even digested.
This is pathetic.
Where did you learn how to shit?
Inedible.
This isn't even cooked.
You'd have to wash it like with a fire hose.
Before I'm 100% sure.
We're gonna wash this with bear piss.
Oh, I'm gonna barf.
- This isn't even cooked. - You'd have to wash it like with a fire hose.
Before I'm 100% sure. - We're gonna wash this with bear piss. - Oh, I'm gonna barf, enough.
Also in Canada news, I was just going through videos and there's these pedophile hunters Like when we were kids, if a Nazi skinhead caught a punk walking down the street, he'd beat the shit out of you.
And, and vice versa.
You'd have fucking skateboarders would bump into a BMX guy and it would be a fight.
Look at hockey.
There's a fight because you're on the other team.
But this guy bumps into a fucking pedophile and berates him for 44 minutes.
Beat him up and call the cops or just call the cops.
But arguing with him about wanting to fuck a 12 year old?
And then he's like, I'm from India, buddy.
Yeah, it's not legal there either, my friend.
It's not even legal in Mexico.
This goes on and on and on, so I won't waste your time, but...
Turn it up.
I didn't know.
Really?
Turn it up.
She's 12 years old, dude.
What's wrong with you, man?
You just came here, and you're looking to get arrested and go back?
She's 12 years old.
You can't do that.
I didn't know.
Really?
I have you in the chats.
You came here to make a life.
Ah, I love... Look, what is this?
What does this mean?
You know what, sir?
I love getting head.
I love having XXX.
I love licking.
I love kissing.
Sir, sir.
I go crazy behind.
Can I just say something?
Say something.
Sir, I really thought she is hating.
Sir, trust me.
And I really... Dude, she confirmed the age with his fist.
See, you jumped too far ahead.
Go back when he has no mask on.
It's not good TV when someone has a mask on.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm really new to Canada.
Sorry, sir.
What's the matter with your head?
I didn't want to do that or anything like that.
No, no!
Read the messages!
You're gonna talk right now before I call the police!
I don't care if you're new to Canada!
That excuse is getting old!
That excuse is getting old!
You get what I'm saying?
He's got the anger.
Like, do you yell at murderers, too?
You jerk, I hate murder!
This is what phones are doing.
Why did you murder someone?
If you put the phone down, you'll... Swear to God, I'm gonna call the cops if you don't apologize!
I checked out his YouTube page and there is instances where he hasn't called the cops because the guy showed remorse.
Come on.
Oh, you mean he got hustled?
Right.
But go back, go back.
So, this is in Toronto.
I don't say Toronto, and don't say Saturday Night Live.
It's Saturday Night Live.
But jump ahead here, like way... They end up going to his house.
It's before that.
I think.
Yeah.
Keep going.
And then he's all buddy-buddy with the guy's roommate.
Keep going.
He's almost there.
No, no.
You're going the wrong fucking way, turd.
Don't worry, your house will be blurred out.
Everything will be blurred out.
Don't worry.
Let's go.
Keep going, Ryan.
You're making me mad again.
Yup.
Yeah, there.
Wait, now go back.
You just went a little too far.
But turn it up.
Okay, let's leave the door open.
Listen.
Do I have permission to come in your house and record?
Yes.
Yes?
Yes.
Okay.
Leave the door open.
Leave the door open.
I don't know who you are.
This is 40 minutes into it.
I typically don't do this.
This is weird.
What are you doing?
Hello, how are you?
Hello, how are you?
I'm just, uh... I caught your friend being a pedophile.
Hey, how's it going, man?
Not too bad.
What you cooking?
Yeah.
What you cooking?
I'm making an omelette.
Omelette?
Yeah.
Omelette, omelette, omelette.
That's good, man.
That's good.
Omelette, omelette, omelette.
That's good, man.
That's good.
Okay, so...
He's blanking.
After you finish your omelette, don't worry.
After you finish your omelette?
What are you doing?
The guy's mentally ill.
I think he's an intense pussy, but he was molested as a kid, so he has the anger, but not the balls.
This is a very serious thing.
40 minutes has gone by.
But not the balls.
This is a very serious thing.
40 minutes has gone by.
Very serious, okay?
Yeah, okay.
So, can you go on this side?
Okay.
Anyway, it goes on and on like that.
That is weird.
Here's a gross sexual thing.
Look at Pervert Wig Pig.
It's a picture I sent separately.
No, no, no, in the airdrop.
Oh, gotcha.
No, no, no.
There.
Can we please just do away with the concept of family-friendly?
Kids should be learning about sex, queer stuff, consent, kink, etc.
from an early age.
Family-friendly is just a way to treat children like shit because adults need power trips.
Now, anyone who's been near a kid knows sex is the very last thing they want to know about in the world.
And this is JewAnarchist69.
Look at his fucking face!
This is a trend going on right now.
Now that weirdos have been normalized, we're starting to see a lot about how kids need to know about sex.
We had that New York school where they were talking about the orgasm gap to, I think it was fifth graders.
And how children are sexual, they are not sexual beings.
I've told this story a hundred times, but I was watching The Croods with my youngest, who's eight, and the girl has a crush on the boy, they're like teenagers, and he was going like this, like, I don't know, someone was having their eyeballs eaten with a fork.
Like, he couldn't look at it.
We turned it off.
They're not into that kind of shit.
Okay?
Can you stop talking about sex and kids?
Drag queen story hour.
Drag queens are sex.
That culture is about sex.
Their names are sexual double entendres.
I can't believe we have to say this in 2021, but get sex away from fucking kids.
Hey kids, this is what polyamorous means.
Speaking of sex, this is another picture I sent you.
I was blown away to see this.
Adrian Tomine is a really talented graphic novel dude.
This is the Chinese guy you're gonna see?
That one.
And one of his first books is called Shortcomings.
It has a ruler down the side.
It's one of the bravest books I've seen.
Forget that it's a graphic novel.
It's one of the bravest confessions, and it's autobiographical, and it's about him getting dumped by this girl he really likes, and her being weird about it, and then him realizing it's because he has a small dick.
Because he's Japanese.
Like I'm reading it going, this is not the kind of thing that's said out loud.
And then he had a million awards and a whole other career.
This was a long ass time, probably 20 years ago.
And then I see he's bringing that back up and having Randall Park play him.
Randall Park.
That's fucking balls, isn't it?
Big balls for such a little dick.
Comparatively big balls.
Now you're Asian, what's your penis look like?
Terrible.
Like a thumbnail?
I mean a thimble?
Like this is pretty accurate.
It's just like a little stub.
It's a nub.
That's hard.
So when you have oral sex, like when a woman says I want to blow you, you're like, it's going to be more like you eating me out.
Yeah, I just giggle and go.
It's tickly.
It's like lesbians give you good blowjobs because they're used to licking clits.
Yeah.
It's like a mouth scissoring.
I see.
And when a woman is fucking you, does she know?
I mean, when you're fucking a woman, is she aware or did she flip through a magazine?
They're awake, but I don't check in.
Because you have big shoes.
Right.
We have the same shoe size.
I think I'm a half size bigger than you.
You're 10?
I'm 10 and Chuck Taylor's.
I'm 10 and a half.
No, you're not.
Yes, I am.
The shoes I stole from you were 10.
Okay, you go a half size down with a Chuck Taylor.
So I'm like close, I could fit in two.
I just said 10 in Chucks and you go, I'm 10 and a half.
Well, not in Chucks.
You're so dumb.
Oh wait, I guess you're right.
It's like windy out.
Wait, what?
You blow, you look, you're so dumb talking to you as like a Maxell tape ad.
Like this?
I just sit on the chair going.
You look like Randall Park.
I'm ten and a half with, you know, Dunks or whatever.
Yeah, same here.
Air Jordans.
We got the same foot.
So that makes me think you do, because my dick is so alarming that, like, I can't, I can't be nude in front of anyone who isn't dying to fuck me.
Then they just get bummed out.
It's like looking at a porn.
Right.
They're like, I'm watching a porn now.
Even like at the, if I'm at the gym and I'm changing and guys see it, they're like, why, who put on the gay porn?
I'm like, that's just me.
It's like looking at, like, a parked Ferrari.
It's like, that thing should be going.
Things should be going.
I want to go for a ride in that.
Vroom vroom, Mr. McInnes.
Vroom.
Vroom vroom.
That's what all the guys in my boxing gym say.
Vroom vroom.
There is a dude, a gay dude there, who I don't change with him anymore.
He just wears a jockstrap with the elastic bands around his lower buns and nothing else.
His buns are there.
That's not good.
And I think he might get a sexual rush from sparring.
Oh.
Yeah, that's what he had on, the blue ones.
Show that?
That's what he wears.
What's the purpose of that?
I don't know.
To have your ass shart.
Maybe it's for sharting a purpose.
He gave one of the guys, he goes, yeah, I wrote a book.
And he gave him a book that he had written, and he was like, oh, cool.
So he gets home, and he didn't know the guy was Gaze Black, the Irish guy who got the book.
And he's looking at it, and he's like, hmm, hmm, hmm.
He took all 12 inches of his cock down and said, ah!
And he threw the book away, like, out of his hands.
Ah!
Masked man's a fag!
Oh, I forgot.
We were supposed to dump the freebies.
We could have just hard cut them.
No, no.
This isn't bad.
We go for half an hour.
It's only 40 minutes.
We're only 10 minutes late.
JohnnyAppleCBD, our oldest sponsor.
JACBD.com.
Oh shit, I said I was going to have the gummies.
I still didn't get around to that.
Everyone swears by the gummies.
They say, cause you know when you wake up at like four with some anxiety and then you wake up at six or your kid comes into bed and is kicking you in his sleep and being upside down or the birds are chirping.
The other day my wife goes, that bird is really annoying.
Cause we both, it was impossible that we'd be asleep.
She didn't have to say, are you awake?
And it was about like five, I almost said five 80, you know, really, really late, like five 80.
That was a story with Vinny Stigma and I think it was what was it Agnostic Front and they were on tour and he fell asleep in the tour van and they're listening to like 899 FM and he's asleep and he wakes up he goes holy shit I was asleep that whole time we're gonna be late And they go, relax, relax, we got plenty of time.
He goes, when is the show?
When is the show?
Vinny Stigma, you should be looking up, by the way.
What are you looking up?
Annoying Birds.
Annoying Birds.
How about Annoying Co-hosts?
Nothing came up for that.
Yeah, well.
And that's the guy.
And he wakes up and he's like, what the fuck?
And he goes, when's the show?
They go, it's nine o'clock.
And he goes, look at the time, it's 899!
One minute away from nine o'clock.
Anyway, yeah.
The gummies, you sleep through the night.
Great.
Now, it's not like you trip balls.
It just, there's no illegal stuff here.
This is pot without the bad stuff.
But we got the isolates and waxes.
I haven't seen that before.
Is that a new one?
At the bottom there?
The supplements, the tinctures above my head.
What else?
Go up a little bit.
That was the pet stuff.
Topicals, cartridges, gummies, tinctures.
What's above my head there?
The stem thing?
That's the cartridges?
The stem vaporizer?
I like the tinctures.
You like the tinctures?
That we've had at the studio.
Hell yeah.
We finished them all.
We just put them in all our coffee.
We need another dose.
True that.
We need a repeat.
Go to JACBD.com.
Use the promo code GAVIN.
Maybe I wasn't clear earlier too.
Need of Fashions, use the promo code GAVIN, say I sent you.
And Tactical Walls, use the promo code GAVIN.
And JACBD, use the promo code GAVIN.
Actually, from now on, anytime you hear us praise something on this show, use the code GAVIN.
Okay?
So thank you, JACBD.com.
Thank you for supporting free speech from day one.
Uh-oh, I'm kind of tripping on my words here.
All right.
So that's the end of the freebie part of the show.
And I would encourage all you freeloaders to go to censored.tv, get a subscription.
We had a big thing on George Floyd this week where we did a separate show.
We broke down this massive list of all the black people killed by whites or the KKK or cops.
And we found four egregious cases where the person was not punished.
Out of 42, they went back to the 60s and two of the four We're from the 60s.
So you're talking about like bombing a black church, a black school, and like horrible KKK shit from the 60s before even Martin Luther King was assassinated.
That America.
So really as far as modern America goes, which I call post-MLK assassination, there's been two Out of 42 horrific examples of racism.
Anyway, that's not the best way to sell Censor.TV, but we got a new show, The Spiel, that I'm very excited about with Gavin Wax and Isabelle O'Reilly.
And Josh Denny's got a new show out.
Jim Goethe's added a live streaming show on his own accord.
AIU is posting very regularly.
Very popular guy.
And of course, Michael Graves of The Misfits.
Radio Deadly.
So more content than you have time to see.
And then I do a show with Anthony Cumia every Wednesday that is live called Compound Censored.
And he also shows it on his network.
So there's a lot.
There's a lot here on the other side.
We'd like you to cross over.
Come to the dark side, Luke.
You can feel the force within you.
Get fired.
Get in trouble.
Be brave and never stop fighting.
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