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Nov. 12, 2020 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes
02:31:45
S03E38 - GREAT TITS [2020-11-12 - S03E38 - GREAT TITS]
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Live from New York, it's get off my lawn with Kevin McGinnis.
Shit a little beast, sister lil' hope.
I love the way you walk, love the way you talk.
Let a young nigga come playing your throat, deep stoke your throat till I make you to throw babies.
I'm trying to throw the babies, throw babies.
I'm trying to bust all oil.
I'm trying to bust all over you.
That's it fleacious.
It's gonna be a pretty X-rated episode.
I should warn you in advance to get the kids out of the room.
God damn it, rap is just fucking gross.
Like, punk was offensive and stuff, but rap is like people talking about their genitalia.
Like Cardi B, who spoke to President-elect, as they're calling him, Joe Biden, she did an interview with him.
She also then that same week came out with a hit song about her wet ass pussy, her whap.
Her vagina is secreting extra fluids because she has such a intense libido.
That also implies that she has more testosterone somehow, you know?
Like when women are super horny, it's kind of a masculine trait.
It's kind of a turnoff.
Yeah, that entire song is about how much he likes this girl because she blows him.
And he wants to have throat babies with her, which is not how biology works.
Like, how...
What?
It's fucking garbage.
Can we spread the word and say that is how babies are made?
Yeah.
And then maybe curb.
Like, why don't you sing about how you defecate or something?
Yeah, yeah.
Big oh shit.
On a toilet.
You're in a blowjob video, lady.
How's your daughter doing?
Oh, she's a dancer.
She's in videos.
Oh, cool.
What was the video?
That's a song about face fucking.
Oh.
I see 12 threes.
I want to get two of you girls.
No, three of you girls together, and I'm going to have sex with a nine.
What do you think of that song, Trump?
Everybody knows what I'm saying is Trump.
The reason I chose that song is because it's a very dangerous song, and I don't want you listening to it.
I sent you a video of a woman listening to it.
And you can see how dangerous it is.
Try to set up the video before you play it there so we don't watch you at work.
Watch this.
Watch this, y'all.
She's going to pass the school bus because she's a badass.
Nice.
Crossing the double yellows.
That wasn't great.
Today's New York Post is 34 infected at a Long Island wedding.
I guess they've ruined this woman's wedding.
Is she sad?
Do you think?
She freaking out?
Is she crying?
Who cares?
It's got a 99.98 survival rate.
There's probably almost no old people at this wedding.
Don't worry about it, my dear.
Congratulations on your wedding.
I don't give a shit.
It's got like a 99.98 survival rate, and we have a vaccine that's 90%.
What percent is that now?
99.999?
Okay.
Probably a higher risk of you dying on your way to the wedding in traffic.
Today's book is John Stossel's No They Can't, Why the Government Fails But Individuals Succeed.
I believe in this book, he says he'll pay you a thousand bucks if you can think of anything.
Give him anything that the free market doesn't do better than the government.
And the thing I like about Stossel is, he's like Michelle Malkin.
He writes in a very conversational way.
And for illiterate people who don't read, like say Ryan Katsu-Rivera, it's a good starter book for you.
There's not a lot of big words in this.
John Stossel, he's not simple.
He's a very complex man, but he writes in a very simple way.
So you can digest it.
And I find it's kind of hard to read after a full day of talking my ass off and reading the news and amalgamating all these stories.
By the time it's like 9 p.m. and everyone's, the kids are in bed, 9.30, whatever, I kind of don't feel like reading Mark Levin or Mark Stein.
I need to chill.
That's why I'm really enjoying the book I'm reading right now, The Blue Chameleon, Daniel Cinquenta.
We interviewed him.
Yeah, we interviewed him.
And right now I'm just reading about, it's sort of like Keith Richards' autobiography, where he gets into way too much detail.
I'm hearing about him getting in fist fights in high school right now.
And when his parents' restaurant burned down.
Can you not pull up this fucking book I'm talking about, you piece of shit?
What are you doing?
Blue chameleon?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like, what are you doing right now?
You're just sort of tooling around?
No, looking at the notes.
You're not listening to a podcast.
You're in it.
Don't look up a blue chameleon.
He's got a screen full of blue chameleons.
Cinquenta Detective.
That's not how you spell it.
Holy shit.
There it is.
So I'm really enjoying that book.
And it is not Levin fair.
The problem with Mark Levin is he's too smart.
And I'm reading his books, and he's talking about like the fucking 26th Amendment and how we could have a national coup.
And if enough lawyers got together, then the president could do this and put these people in jail.
And you're like, am I reading the blueprints for a revolution?
Which is cool, but like, that's like going to West Point.
His books are like going to the military academy and learning how to save America.
Too hard, too complex.
So, know when I make these suggestions, I'm not suggesting a book you should.
Actually, I did that once.
That book, what's it called?
Where those small places in England ended up shaping the American mindset.
Shit.
I got it from the America First Reading List that Milo put together with Nick Fuentez and Michelle Malkin.
I can't remember what it's called.
I sent that to Max and John in prison.
It's a book you should read, but it's very dense.
I usually don't recommend books like that.
The books I recommend are fun.
A fun time.
Anyway, sorry.
Total tangent.
I want to get serious for a second about tits.
What's that?
Yeah, that's the list.
Well, maybe we can find it there.
What's it called?
Fine.
I don't even know what you're looking at.
Scroll down, scroll down.
Stop, stop, bad, dipped, bad, camp of the saints.
There's a lot here.
So I'm suggesting a find thing where you search.
Yeah, but I don't know what we're searching.
England?
Origin?
This is not good TV.
And it's a book no one is going to read anyway.
Let's focus on some good TV, though.
I sent you a separate email with a file there featuring various women.
Local beers had a miss whatever, Budweiser thing.
So every beer, every beer around the world had their miss whatever.
And it shows them topless.
Now, I don't see this as offensive.
When I was a kid in Scotland, you got the sun, and there was the page three girl, and she'd have her tits hanging out.
So I was seeing tits when I was, my whole entire life.
I was sucking on them right after I was born.
And then we saw tits around.
So I don't have any reticence about showing this, but I thought it might be a fun moment to look at some great tits.
Stop.
Are those real?
No.
You don't think so?
Well, they have a natural sag, but I'm going to say no.
But usually you can see a mark where the fakeness was put in.
You're right.
They're fucking fake, and that's gross.
Ladies, why didn't you ask us about fake tits?
We would have said no.
I met one guy in my life who likes fake tits.
And I don't get it.
Again, my dad could have those tits.
That means it's not appealing to me.
It's man-made.
You're with a Zix doll.
Okay, next.
Stop.
Get me out of here.
I mean, I think those are perfect.
What do you think?
There's some magic going on there.
They're being held up by whatever she's wearing.
Not that much.
I expect a small amount of floppage, but yeah, that's pretty much what you see with the city.
I think in the perfect hit has droop to it.
I think a perfect hit is a two or three pencils.
The tone of the nipple is not exactly my fave.
What's the problem with kind of the pinker, more on the pinker end?
What?
You're a fag.
I'm more of a white girl type of guy.
This is why I don't like Asians.
Because their nipples aren't pink enough?
Yeah, and they're the stupidest thing I've ever seen.
And they're down there, it's a little darker than usual.
Check it out.
They're pussy lips?
Yes.
What kind of homo is concerned with the color of the picture?
Oh, I'm not concerned because I get what I want, and it's not that.
It's white and it's pink, and it's pretty good.
Those are great, but they lack character.
They're not fun.
Yeah, exactly.
They don't have enough spirit behind them.
I'm like a...
With tits, I'm like a wine tester.
I'm like a sommalier.
He said, well, let's see.
We got Lone Star, PBR, Rolling Rock, Shiner Bach.
Fantastic.
I agree.
The puffiness is fun.
Let's give numbers, okay?
So we can speed this up.
We'll just yell it out.
Those are eights.
Zeros, ones.
Well, okay.
Obviously, she's a fucking knockout, but I'm going to give her a three for those.
Those are six.
No, those are fake.
So threes.
There should be a rule.
No fakes.
If you miss something, then you should be perfect.
It shouldn't be something we have to pay for.
This is an entire fucking country.
And you got to get fake ones?
Those are one of those.
Those could be those ones that are real, but they look fake.
And then you realize, oh, this is what they based fake tits on.
Oh, good point.
This is the origin.
You're seeing ground zero of boobies.
Anyway, the previous one was a six.
These I'm going to give like a nine.
Budweiser has the best.
This fake shit is ruining this whole thing.
Just play this.
I don't know if there's a fake.
I don't know what those are.
Fives.
That looks great and real.
That's a real woman.
You know, you could really romp around with her.
I'm going to give those a nine.
Sea thief to get out of the beer on the wall.
Those are fun.
Those are like sevens, Miss Chang.
Kind of hard to see what's going on there.
Expect ratio is horrendous.
Yeah, you kind of screwed this.
My cousin sent this to me from Scotland, and they're not big on technology.
And he sent the way they send you a meme, too, is they send you the file.
So that's why I had to send it to you like that.
I don't have a link.
This is like a 60-megabyte email he sent me.
Thanks, Glenn.
Those are fantastic.
What a fun romp she would be.
Let's give those an 8.5.
Needless to say, I would.
See, you like them to be a little bit funny.
So those are 8.9s.
Keep going.
Pretty impressed as he handed me an ice cold beer from a chest and said nothing.
8s.
I'm too biased here.
I want to just give them all 10s.
Those are obscured, by the way.
Those are fun and weird.
Different?
They're very 70s.
Those are the definitions of 100%.
Why are tits different in different decades?
Why can you spot a 50s tit, a 60s tit, a 70s tit?
Diet?
Is that diet?
Is it the amount of milk we drink?
I mean, hormones, diet.
What the fuck?
Back in the day, I don't know.
And that weird seam in the middle.
Like, you don't see that anymore.
Oh, yeah.
They're farther apart now.
Tits have been separating.
Where are they going to be in 2030?
Just hanging under your armpits?
Yeah, basically.
Dear biologists, why are tits traveling?
Last Trump.
You're fired.
Wow.
The guy who makes the tits are fired?
I don't know.
I think I'm fired.
I don't think he's enjoying this segment.
I see.
Those are asymmetrical, which can be kind of fun too, but I'm afraid we're going to go with the sixth on those.
Yeah.
You have two beautiful tits, but they're from different people.
Pick a tit lady.
Boo, ones.
Look at those ridiculous cartoon balls.
Those are fake.
Yeah.
They're just dumb.
What am I supposed to do with those when we fornicate?
Like, shake them around?
It looks like she's laying down.
They're just dumb.
Dumb tits.
Those look pretty real.
I'm going to give those a 6.9.
I don't know.
Maybe I shouldn't be rating tits.
I don't feel like...
These are early tits.
I don't feel confident in my ratings.
It's sort of like some guy showed me his dating app, and I was like, I would just sit here and go, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, all day.
Those are stupid.
Get out of here.
I think Canada could do better than that.
She's obviously pretty, but you know what I mean?
Those are fun little silly ones.
I can't maybe get rid of it.
Where was that from?
That was India.
You got a lot of people to deal with there.
I like little tits, too.
Yeah.
Those are great, although she's not very hot.
Some fun stuff.
Whatever.
I'm not mad at it.
Too weird.
Freaking me out.
I don't understand.
Your tits are scaring me, actually.
They look like a face.
Cool?
That's a winner.
Just assume I mean eight if I don't say otherwise.
Those are cool.
Okay, this is getting ridiculous.
How much longer is it?
Six more minutes.
Really?
No, no. 38 seconds.
36 seconds.
Fantastic, fun.
Great.
Exquisite.
Hard to argue with those.
Again, the Australians always look like they're good for a romp.
Don't you just want to start wrestling with her?
My tit can wrestle you easily.
Did I die?
Alright, so that's not news.
Why did you show us that, Gavin?
Because I didn't care about climate change until today, but all of those tits you saw could be obliterated if we don't do something right now.
I've been very cynical about climate change up until this moment.
And now, all of a sudden, I care.
I saw this in the paper today, and it is a major concern.
One, two.
I don't know what we can do.
I guess recycle cups?
Yeah, click on the actual article.
Well, you're kind of ruining everything.
Great tits could be wiped out by climate change in the near future.
And if you scroll down, it explains.
Oh.
Okay, sorry about that.
That was a huge mistake.
And I just wasted the beginning of the show.
I should probably read more than the headline when I'm researching these things.
Okay, here's something that is serious.
When you hear about people getting prostates, their prostates checked and stuff, I think that's fucking gay.
You're sitting there in a hospital or a doctor's office or the hallway of a hospital.
Some dude is putting his finger up your ass.
Just get prostate cancer.
Don't do gay shit.
Like get your fucking, get fingers up your butt.
And we all hate that that happens, that in a doctor's office today, at a hospital today, right now, some perverted doctor is like, fingering some guy's ass.
Well, the good news is someone said, you know what?
I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore.
And they stood up to this disgusting, veiled homosexual act and they fought back.
This is obviously 1-3.
You'll notice that I move in chronological order unless I say otherwise.
So look at this guy.
Finger up the butt, right?
And he just says, no, stop it.
This is fucking gay.
And he takes care of business.
Yeah.
He beats up the entire hospital.
And then that dude over there, who was getting his butt examined, is like, yeah, maybe this is gross.
Nurses getting in there.
So, my point of showing this video is you don't have to sit and take it.
If you think fag shit is going on, get in there.
Beat up the hospital.
Stop them from doing that shit.
Also in the news, equally important, Chrissy Teigen's forehead is big enough to broadcast a movie on.
So she could just sit in a chair and John, what's his name, could just project a movie that the kids could just look at that.
Look at that thing.
She looks like something out of Star Trek.
It looks like a species, doesn't it?
Like a Klingon.
Yeah, like a cool species.
Humans get along with them great.
Sometimes humans even breed with them.
But that does not look like a human forehead.
You see, black girls will have this sometimes because they pull their hair back so much.
Eventually the hair gives up the fight.
But she's half Asian.
So I don't see how she ended up in this predicament.
Look at that thing.
I'm half Asian, half forehead.
Wow.
Yeah, that is remarkable.
Also, you'll notice the news is very fun on today's app.
You remember this guy who swore?
So when I saw this the first time, I thought, holy shit, he probably found out that, you know, they just showed him pictures of him nude, fucking some prostitute in Las Vegas or something really brutal.
Like he's going to jail.
He got caught embezzling money.
Check out his reaction.
This guy must be such a intelligence community.
Kin, what have you learned, sir?
Oh, shit.
Fuck.
Okay.
So you go, what happened that made him do this?
What was the horrible thing?
Well, in his apology, he explains what happened.
And it's absolutely nothing.
So sorry for the profanity I used on the air.
I was experiencing some technical difficulties and mistakenly hung up on the control room, though my mic was still on.
Perils of playing indoor producer.
What a pussy.
He's swearing like his life is over and an interview didn't go as planned.
That's your life?
What a dork.
Anyway, do you want to start getting serious?
Is that enough jokes?
Am I being funny enough?
No more jokes.
I didn't feel like that.
Those were a lot funnier when I wrote them down.
I think people enjoy them.
Maybe I'm not funny.
Maybe I'm as unfunny as a lesbian.
I saw this video of two lesbians explaining feminism to me, and I realized it's the least funny thing I've ever seen.
Let's go check it out right now, shall we?
Hi there.
We're here to talk about feminism.
What does that mean?
It means I'm reading lines in front of me and I've never done this before and I suck at it.
It also means that women are equal to men.
I'm reading words now in a weird order that doesn't sound like talking.
And above all that, the whole thesis of this show seems to be that women should be equal to men.
Hey, how is that so radical?
It's not, you stupid bitches.
You are equal to men.
Check out these two lesbians talking like retarded infants.
Hey, this is, she said, a space where women talk about stuff.
And I'm your host, Cameron Esposito, a woman.
As a woman, I know I'm valuable.
Dare I say, just as valuable as a man.
Who in the lingering fuck thinks that women are not as valuable as men?
Conservatives, Republicans, paleoconservatives, neocons, traditionalists, Catholics, Christians, not lefts, all value women more than you.
We put them on a pedestal.
We say they're not equal.
They're better.
They're more valuable.
They create human life.
They shape human life.
They freak us out.
We think they're magic.
You think they're shitty comedians like you.
What's with her weird face, dude?
And her hair.
As a woman, I know I'm valuable.
Dare I say just as valuable as a man?
Yeah, you dare.
Feminism is the social movement that agrees with me.
Here's my co-host, Rhea Butcher.
Oh, hey, Rhea.
What's up?
Feminism.
That's when she said that?
When she went like this?
After feminism, I stopped watching and I thought, this is a green screen.
I gotta go and watch this with you.
Look at this weird little boy.
You know, like every time a lesbian tries to become a man, they end up looking like Doogie Hauser.
She looks like a genius 13-year-old boy who is already at Harvard.
He skipped right through high school.
He did three grades in one year.
He's a prodigy.
You're not a dude, and you're apparently not a woman.
I guess you're trans.
You're transitioning from little boy to littler boy.
Feminism.
What is your destiny?
Feminism.
Feminism is the belief in the political, social, and economic equality of the sexes.
Wait a minute.
Do you mean like...
Wait, wait, what's with the tone here?
Equality of the sexes.
Who are you?
You look like a kids in the hall character.
Social, and economic equality of the sexes.
Wait a minute.
Do you mean like...
Wait, no one talks like that.
No one on earth talks like that.
Hey, man, what you been doing?
I woke up, went to the gym, got in my car, and went to the studio.
Like they'd go, oh, this person's severely autistic.
Thank God they can feed themselves and have a normal life.
Like when someone talks like that, you go, you can do it, champ.
Remember to shower.
I've heard that about, you know, both mentally retarded people and severely autistic people.
They do live at home.
They can do their bills.
They can, they make brownies for dinner and stuff like that, but they sort of live.
But you've got to keep going.
Did you shower?
Did you shower?
They keep forgetting to shower.
Apparently, that's the word on the street with special people.
Political, social, and economic equality of the sexes.
Wait a minute.
Do you mean like feminists believe that men and women are equal?
Yes.
This is like cable access kids show stuff.
This is how they talk on Barney the Dinosaur.
This is romper room.
That's accurate.
Sometimes I feel like feminism gets a bad rap because people think that just these two are in a relationship.
They spend hundreds of hours together.
I think they're fucking married.
Can you guys not have a normal rapport?
Like just talk about what you think feminism is.
As lesbians, I'm sure it's the only thing you know about.
It's like asking a fucking Scientologist about L. Ron Hubbard.
So just riff on it, ladies.
It's your area of expertise.
I bet you both did it in school.
I bet you both have degrees in women's studies.
How are you doing this awkward, weird verbiage?
This fucking, this bombastic nomenclature.
Feminism is about women being better than men.
But in reality, feminism is just about equality.
Look at all these equal signs: equal signs, equal signs, equal signs.
Men, women, equal men, women, equal men, women, equal.
You are equal, you stupid cow.
How about this?
Start out your show with a crystal clear example of how women are not equal to men.
I presume they'd say, well, women don't have rights to their own bodies because you can't get an abortion.
I wish that was the case.
And no one has the right to go kill someone.
Bloods do not have the rights to kill crips.
So you first have to argue that it's not a life if you want to say that it's just a choice for your body.
Because I don't care where the human being is.
You're not allowed to fucking kill it.
That's a complex argument, though.
I'll give you that.
And I've seen a lot of very interesting debates about abortion.
We study them in school, actually, in women's studies.
And I think I remember in women's studies, it was Marvin Glass was our professor, and he was the head of the Canadian Communist Party.
No, I'm not exaggerating.
And he had this big, long analogy about what if you woke up one day and there's a pianist, like a piano player, in your house, and you just had to live with him.
And you couldn't get rid of him.
He was the world's greatest piano player.
And if you got kicked him out of the house, he'd die.
Should you be able to kick him out of the house?
I think that was the rough analogy.
And I remember as a kid, as an 18-year-old in college going, he should die, just like babies.
Do I get an A-plus?
And now I look back in retrospect and go, oh, well, if he's going to die outside, yeah, you got a piano player as a roommate.
Free music.
Maria.
That's the guy from Terminator 2.
That's the same guy.
No, that guy's got masculinity.
This is a little boy.
Like, I want to hang out with this little boy and teach him how to get laid.
Wait, I don't mean a little boy.
You know what I mean.
Teach him how to talk to girls.
Feminist?
Yes, I am a feminist.
I'm a feminist, too.
Congratulations.
Thank you.
Why are you a feminist?
I mean, feminism is important to me personally because...
Stop.
Why do they keep talking to the camera in a talk show?
I don't understand that.
I was raised by a single mother, and I saw her work really hard at a job and take care of a whole family by herself.
What did you get from that that has to do with feminism?
Well, I know that now there's like a huge wage gap, which is the percentage of money that men earn versus what women earn.
The wage gap.
That old cliche.
I think this might be because they're in LA and everyone in L.A. is stupid.
So you can say the wage gap there and people go, oh yeah, I've heard loose things about that.
What is it again?
It's that women make 75 cents on the dollar.
Really?
Like, even her mom was a waitress?
Female waitresses do way better than male waiters, especially when they're hot and sexy.
And the wage gap, I won't bore you guys with it.
You know the whole story.
Women make more money than men until they have kids.
Eventually, they end up making less than men because they're less ambitious.
They would rather be home with the family.
Remember my fucking Tamara Holder thing on Fox on Hannity that went super viral and people still come up to me on the street to talk about it?
It's just intuitive.
We all knew this before the data showed up.
Then the data showed up and we went, oh shit, yeah, my suspicions are confirmed.
If women were cheaper for the same amount of work, then they would fucking, we'd all hire them.
And also, women take bullshit in college for the most part.
They take like speech pathology and mass comm and what I took, which is English.
Total, those are not lucrative pursuits.
STEM is a lucrative pursuit, and women tend not to choose STEM.
Now, I think that's genetic.
I think men have more testosterone.
Testosterone is a concentration drug, and I think that tends to be more lucrative.
Look at what these dumb bitches chose.
Comedy.
And the only reason they have careers is because of affirmative action, social justice comedy.
That's why these two have a show.
If these were men, can you imagine how badly they'd be mocked for this piece of shit?
It's literally a shit show.
So like, what does a woman earn to do the same job as a man?
Typically, women make about 71% of what men make.
But if you factor in race, the gap is even bigger.
White women on average make 78% of what a white man makes.
And a Latino woman on average makes 54% of what a white man makes.
Yeah.
Yeah.
This is a dangerous area to tread as a feminist.
In a free country, in a free market where everyone basically gets paid what they're worth.
Yes, there's old money.
There's lottery winners.
There's exceptions.
But you're in a meritocracy.
So when you start saying, these might as well be IQ tests, you might as well say Latin women score less on IQ tests.
You're basically saying they're less good at working.
They're less good at high-paying jobs like chemistry and engineering and technology and mathematics.
Careful with the data.
It's almost like things are stacked against women and we need like an overarching word that could help us to be treated equally.
Wait a minute.
I think I'm describing feminism.
But are there any other ways in which women are like not equal to men right now in our world?
Yeah, Cameron, did you know that only 20% of Congress is women?
Yeah, that's true.
Women are underrepresented in politics.
That's because it's a fucking time-consuming job where you can't be with your family.
You're gone for months at a time.
Most politicians in D.C. have two homes.
They have their apartment in D.C. and then their house in Virginia.
They're gone for months and months and months.
Women tend not to like that.
It's also about power and a huge part of it is ego.
They tend to have male traits.
That's why.
And by the way, this whole like women are treated badly.
You're the majority of the world's population.
You're the boss.
You're in charge.
Women?
So as women, we live in a society that's not created by men.
You know, I've noticed this.
Stop.
I've noticed this with the left, where they'll do this shit, where they talk like children.
For example, with the masks, I heard.
Let me make this very simple for you.
If you're not wearing pants and you go pee, you can spray pee on everything.
If I'm wearing pants and you're wearing pants, then the pee stays in your pants and you don't get any pee on me.
If I'm wearing no pants, and he did this whole pants analogy about peeing your pants, or the other thing they do is they're like, Let me explain it to you.
If Johnny has eight building blocks and Joey has one building block, don't you think it makes sense for Johnny to give Joey some building blocks and they can both play?
And you go, wow, your brain is so facile that you have to go back to kindergarten for your system to make any sense.
Johnny busted his ass for those eight blocks.
Joey's third generation welfare.
Sorry, Joey, you don't get any more blocks.
And this sort of, this is another major logical flaw with these fucking dunce bags is they look at the outcomes.
Chinese people aren't in the NBA.
Only 2% of the NBA is Chinese.
Ergo, the NBA, is anti-Chinese.
You can't just look at the outcomes and assume there's some sort of grand master plan there.
Sorry, ladies, we're not controlling your outcomes.
You are.
So it's almost like even if you don't realize that you're being affected by this, it affects everyone.
Like, for instance, if you're a woman and you're a young woman, you don't have a job yet, maybe someday this will affect you the way that you're paid.
Or like if you're a dude and you have a mom or a sister or you just live in the world and would like women to be treated equally, it's almost like they should care about this.
So we've been working at this for a long time and we still have some work to do.
Look at late night television.
There are currently no female late night hosts.
I think we have things to say and space in this world.
And that's what this show is for.
I think we have things to say in space in this world.
She's disappointed, right, that there are not more female talk show hosts as she delivers the worst possible talk show imaginable.
This is the worst thing I've ever seen.
And I have kids, so I've watched 14 years now of kids' shows with my various other kids going through their Nickelodeon phase.
You ever see a kid's sitcom?
It's brutal.
It's shocking how bad it is, but they have to overact because kids like that oversell.
This is a child's oversell, and she's mad that she doesn't have a talk show.
And it's ironic that she's putting herself in a TV when she's already on TV and eating shit at it.
She eats the poo-poo all over the place.
But I think there could be more shows like this.
Plus, this shows.
This does look like the other one, her name should be Kyle.
No offense to Kyle's out there.
Some of my best friends are Kyle.
Actually, my best friend is a Kyle.
Or Jared Holt.
My brother.
Seems like a good name.
I think there could be more shit.
Jared Holt.
Yeah, he does look like a Jared.
He does.
Yes, he does.
Is that a he?
What's your pronouns, dude?
You look like a fucking nerd.
You look like a snitch.
He looks like the guy runs to the teacher and tells that you guys were putting firecrackers in a frog.
Plus, this shows me a snitch.
I'm like five minutes long.
Very short.
I'm a feminist because I'm a stand-up comic.
I work in a male-dominated field.
And although I feel...
Why is comedy dominated by males?
Because men have to be funny to win.
All women have to do is be a six to a ten.
Fives, you know, you see a woman at Walmart who's 650 pounds.
She's with a dude.
A dude fucks her.
Maybe these fatties are great at BJs.
I don't quite understand it.
But that's all women have to do.
Men, we're not, this is not fucking selling any, this is not a male model.
I'm not David Beckham.
So I got to get out there and shuck and jive and make you laugh.
That's been going on for generations.
That's been going on since we were little kids.
Hey, ladies, what's going on?
Here's a funny joke.
So that's why comedy is male-dominated.
It's not sexism.
In fact, one of the things I love about comedy, before it was ruined by cunts like these two, it used to be a total meritocracy.
It's a very weird gift.
I'd say maybe 5% of the population is funny.
Out of that 5%, 4% are male, 1% are female.
And there's genuinely hilarious people out there.
I think Tina Faye is one of the greatest TV writers of all time.
But we don't need to dwell on the few women who are actually funny.
We've had them on the show a million times.
But this, it used to be like skateboarding.
If you go to a skate park, they don't care if you're an albino, if you're fucking nine feet tall and 400 pounds, if you're black, white.
They don't give a shit because it's such a hard thing to do that everyone is very polite.
They get out of your way.
Even little kids who are learning.
I used to bring my middle boy there when he was about six.
And so he's taken up space.
And they want to go do a trick.
And there he is on a ramp going up and then down, not even doing anything on the little quarter pipe thing.
And they give him space because they were there too.
And they're just working on their fucking ollie kick flips and their Ollie McTwists or whatever the kids are up to.
They're boneless ones and their hand plants.
But it's such a meritocracy there that there's no judgment.
It's the same with boxing.
You know, they'll spar with anyone.
It's so hard to get punched in the head and be strategic at the same time that there's no judgment going on.
And that used to be comedy.
Those used to be three areas of total meritocracy.
Now we just have boxing and skateboarding.
Comedy's been ruined.
And it's been ruined by you, bitch.
Here, say something funny.
Go.
So much support and love for my fellow comics.
I also know that sometimes I'm put in positions that they're not put in.
So I believe that I am equal to my peers.
And I also know that most of my male peers believe they are equal to me.
Like, I know they respect me.
And so it's just...
Why?
Why would anyone respect you?
You suck.
Institutional thing.
It's something we need to talk about.
We need to talk about how women are making it.
So even though this woman goes out, does her terrible comedy and is totally respected by everyone, she goes, I know, look, I know you guys are cool, but it's systemic.
It's floating through the cosmos.
This is like what they did when Me Too started way back, way back.
Like I'm talking five or seven years ago when it just started getting cooking.
There was this quid pro quo was sexual harassment, right?
And that makes sense.
Blow me and you'll get a raise.
That's illegal.
I don't really agree with that.
I think you should just quit your job.
your boss is an asshole.
But anyway, that's illegal, and we all get that one.
But then the second one was just allowing for an environment where sexual harassment could exist.
So it was like this amorphous gas that's just sort of floating through the workplace, and it's your fault the gas is there.
So when they can't come up with concrete examples, they say, oh no, it's systemic.
It's a gas.
It's a ghost.
You can't touch it.
Okay, well, fuck you then.
I'm not going to run around chasing ghosts.
That's Scooby-Doo fare.
When we walk down the street at night, we should feel safe.
When we go into work at the moment, I don't feel safe in East New York at night.
And you're talking about black men, by the way, my dear.
So that's twice now you've been racist by accident.
Respected.
We should be somebody's boss if we work hard enough and have this boss.
God, the head of everything is female now.
And that's why everything female is tanking.
Look at vice.
Those are the things I believe.
And those things make me a feminist.
Not only are women equal to men, but men are also equal to women.
We absolutely believe.
I hope I'm not equal to this shit.
Believe that.
And now, how about a final word?
The great thing about feminism is that anyone can be a feminist.
Any race, any age, any sex or gender.
And that includes you.
Hey, thanks for watching She Said.
You can follow me on Twitter at at CameronSpace.
That was four minutes of a talk show with absolutely...
Whoa, what?
Are they different species?
What the fuck?
What just happened there?
Is she in the foreground?
They're clearly not sharing hats.
Holy shit.
Look at that.
Two different species.
This is like Homo sapien and Neanderthal.
Who knew two humans could have such different bone structure?
This Kyle is a fucking beast.
Kyle's 10 feet tall.
Go back.
And that includes you.
Hey, thanks for watching She Said.
You can follow me on Twitter at at Cameron Espazier.
And I'm at Rio Butcher.
Tweeted us.
We'd love to hear from you.
We really would.
To watch more, click here.
Oh, another final word.
We'd love to hear from you.
We really would.
That was so fucking grim.
That looked like one of those videos where the employees at a meat packing plant decided to do a rap together to promote Lewis meats.
Jesus Christ, ladies, the reason you're not getting paid as much as other people is not because you're a woman.
It's because you saw.
Since a little beast, since a little hoe, I love the way you walk, love the way you talk.
Little young nigga come play in your throat.
Deep soak your throat till I make you choke.
You stroke your throat till I make you choke.
Little little nigga come play in your throat.
And that woman who got in the car accident was listening to that song.
Yeah.
Just going, hmm.
I wish someone would write a song about my blowjobs.
I think I'm going to crash into a bus.
Imagine being a guy listening to that song about another man using his dick.
Yeah.
Well, that happened to my brother once.
There was a song by, what was his name?
Yeah, I love this.
Big Pimp or something.
The Puerto Rican rapper from the Bronx.
Oh, Big Pun?
Big Pun.
And he's like, where are my bitches with the big tits or something?
And then we're with the big fat asses.
And then the woman sing the chorus, where my niggas with the big dicks.
And it's like a back and forth.
And my brother caught himself like turning the car.
He's like, where are my niggas with the big dicks?
Ah.
Fuck did I just say?
Let's see, Ria.
Let's see their comedy.
Okay.
Because they're obviously out of their element.
Maybe they.
Am I looking or is that a link?
No, there's no link.
Carmen Esposito.
So this is a woman who is a professional stand-up comedian, Amy Poehler, who is funny, by the way.
Her stand-up is good.
Now, half her jokes are stolen, but let's see how funny this woman is.
And if it's on YouTube, right, then it's like, this is my polished, top-quality shit.
Like, this is what my people put out.
This is me on Adjust for Last.
This is me basically doing my greatest hits.
Do the top one.
So this is Conan.
You spend your whole life getting to Conan, as far as a stand-up goes.
And this is it.
This is where you do all your hits.
These jokes might be six years old, but they are the things that always work for her.
Knock it out of the park, Esposito, you weird midget.
It is so good to be here with Conan and Andy and you.
Yes!
I'm so insincere.
It is also so good to be in 2020.
For me personally, really good to be in 2020.
2019, not the best year of my life.
I got divorced in 2019.
From a woman?
Oh, thank you.
Thank you.
And a couple claps.
You know, I will say...
This is a horror movie.
W-H-O-R-E.
It does make me a bit of a pioneer.
You know, a gay divorcee.
We haven't even had that long enough to realize that it rhymes.
That's hilarious.
We could have been laughing about that for a longer period of time, but we didn't have our rights, was really the main obstacle.
Apparently it didn't work out.
Great.
You told us you need to get married.
Your love is just as valid.
And how long were you married for, Cameron?
I'm guessing like two years.
That's the elephant in the room with these bitches, too.
Gay divorce is through the fucking roof.
And they must be freaking out, too, because they must have to pay alimony.
And alimony was invented because Nona's stirring the spaghetti and then he dumps her for some young chicken.
All she knows is feeding kids.
Now she has to feed the kids with no money?
No, you pay her.
You made her have babies.
You pay for the babies.
But gays are like, what?
No one was making any spaghetti sauce.
We went out for dinner every night.
Why do I have to pay?
It's what you signed up for, you dunce.
This is tough for me to admit to you as an artist, but my parents are together.
My folks are together.
I come from a stable home.
Why am I doing this?
My folks are love.
They're best friends.
They've been together for 50 years.
Their bodies are morphing so they look more like each other every day.
They share one.
Sympathy laughs.
If you said to me that your parents said, my parents have been together for 50 years.
If I said to you that their bodies are starting to morph together, they've been together so long, you'd go like this.
You wouldn't go, classic Gav.
Classic Gav.
Okay, so that's a shit show.
And I'm almost interested enough to look up how long she was married.
We know it was a short amount of time.
But let's see, Rhea Butcher, right?
Her...
Wait, was that her ex?
Did she do a video with her divorced, her ex-wife?
This was in March.
And when was that video made?
Holy spokies, maybe you're right.
Let's look it up.
I'm faster on my phone.
But look up her stand-up while I look up that.
Okay.
Cam meet up with Hillbillies.
Thanks, you guys.
My name is Rhea Butcher.
It's not a fake name.
For diarrhea?
That's true.
Okay, so she was married to her.
I nailed it.
She was married to Kyle here for three years.
So they just ended it.
2015 to 2018.
So that video I showed you, that was new.
So she was doing it with her ex.
What?
They were telling us how they deserve everything that we have, and then we gave them what we have, and they fucked it up.
What is she dressed in?
Was it sitting on the counter?
Is she a farmer's accountant?
What is she wearing?
Are you working class?
Is that what your jacket is?
Do you split wood all day?
Were you working on your transmission, you tranny?
It's not a fake name.
It's funny because it's true.
Nope.
I'm butcher than all of you.
I like buy a lot, too.
I'm really bringing it tonight.
That's okay.
That's mildly nice.
When I got to my hotel earlier, the valet came running out and he was out of breath.
He was like, oh my God.
Oh, thank God you're here.
We have a bunch of manual transmission cars.
Hey, yeah, that's the joke I just did.
Yeah.
And none of us can drive them.
Please help us.
And I was like, how many you got?
Ten?
I'll do two at a time.
Let's get this thing done.
That never happened and never would happen in a billion years.
No one thinks you look like a tough guy.
No one thinks you're a mechanic.
I just said your joke sarcastically 20 seconds before you opened your fucking gay little 12-year-old boy mouth.
I love having this last name, butcher, because I am a lifetime vegetarian.
Okay, that's not the thing.
My name's Gavin McInnes, which sounds like Guinness, but I don't really drink Guinness that much.
I'm more of a bud guy.
Okay, Topsy-Turvy Town.
Robert Plant eats meat.
I'm actually Japanese and Puerto Rican, so my last name is Ketsu Rivera.
One of them is a middle name, to be fair.
It's not what you'd expect.
I'm the kind of guy who has sushi with my burrito.
So yeah.
If Taco Bell ever sells sushi, I'll be the first in line.
But don't go there.
They'll probably give you diarrhea.
Things about me.
Sure.
I've had that irony my entire life, but not too much iron in my diet.
Just very...
Oh, my God.
These are joke book jokes.
Honestly, don't even know how I'm standing here right now.
My muscles are just made out of sunflower seeds and hope.
Mildly okay.
Do you see the pain in the eyes?
Are just made out of sunflower seeds and hope.
Oh no.
I can't.
That was sad.
The delivery is.
What does she sound exactly like?
She sounds like Ellen.
Yeah, like Ellen and a little bit like Bonnie McFarland.
Is there a lesbian larynx?
Made out of sunflower seeds and hope.
Sunflower seeds and hope.
I can't wear a Fitbit.
It just counts wishes.
I don't get that.
It's pointless.
I stayed a vegetarian because I like animals a lot.
I still love them.
Which is so silly because if I ran into a lion and I was like, hey, I think you're cool, that lion would not care.
Yeah, that's...
But I do like animals, so I decided.
Okay, that's enough.
That's enough.
That's enough.
That's enough.
I zoned out.
What was that like?
That was like watching a woman chop wood.
It's like being wood.
Remember Samantha B's awesome, hilarious sketch about how to chop wood?
How much wood would a wood chop wood if a wood chop was Samantha B?
It was like, I'm not very strong.
I'm not good at chopping wood.
And I'm watching it going, I know.
I've met you a few times.
You're a small lady who used to be kind of funny.
I've hung out with her and her family.
Fun times.
Cool people, believe it or not.
And then politics.
It's when people get into politics that shouldn't be getting into politics.
Tucker always says, if you care about something irrationally, then you shouldn't be writing about it.
Tucker's been doing politics his whole life.
So when he talks about it, he's like, this is fucked up.
Blah, blah, blah.
These lunatics are maniacal.
Survive and thrive while also social distancing.
This is being at home.
I wonder if it's too easy than being happy.
Oh, when was this made?
We've been doing March 18th.
Get it?
I'm not strong.
Shit.
Oh, you hear that?
That's the sound of March 18th, 2020.
Guess who he's going to come crying to?
We've been doing this for a long ass time.
Which brings us to our COVID section of the show.
My friend Paul's prediction, Proud Boy Paul, is something I now wish I stole because it's looking like it's going to be a thing.
Remember, I'm over to 2.5 now.
Paul said when Biden gets in, he's going to shut down the entire country for two months.
So I guess that's January and February.
And no one Is going to be allowed to do shit.
And then we'll all be unleashed.
And COVID's going away naturally.
But if he can say, there, I did it.
Now the economy will start up again.
He can just totally say 24 hours a day, everything's open, everything's rocking.
And he'll look like a hero.
And then we have Biden COVID advisor says U.S. lockdown of four to six weeks could control pandemic and revive economy.
What a fucking scam.
So I think he's right.
And then we have this Biden advisor.
Look, what did the left do?
They said COVID's really bad.
Use mail-in votes.
Oh yeah, look, sorry, that's not what this was.
COVID 1984.
Biden advisor recommends nationwide lockdown to revive economy.
It's not hard, man.
I did it myself.
I'm so mad at myself because Paul's smart.
And what I like to do is steal smart people's predictions.
Because they do all the research, all the stuff.
And I look at him and I go, hmm, you've been right a few times.
You do a lot of reading.
I'm stealing your prediction.
And I thought, no, I'm not going to put, I'm not going to go out on a limb.
I'm not stealing this.
I could have been, I could have looked like a prophet.
Nostragavis.
What's the next one now?
2-7?
Yeah.
Oh, this was funny.
Biden's chief of staff has some interesting views on elections.
So Biden used COVID to force mail-ins.
Mail-ins are great for cheaters, and that's how the two are related.
So Vox says 65% of Americans think elections are rigged.
His chief of staff goes, that's because they are.
In 2014, he said that.
Isn't that amazing?
They're rigged, and I know how to rig them.
That woman in the foreground has strange tits, doesn't she?
They look like they've been removed.
Removed.
They are moving.
Yeah.
Got to ask those documents.
And I heard, actually, I don't have this in the links, but I heard that Biden said, mail-in votes are good.
Come on, man.
And he wants to use them again, like for another election.
When?
In four years?
Where your second term would come up?
You want to use mail-ins again then?
They're just really effective.
Yeah, they are.
As your chief of staff said, they're great for cheaters.
What was 2-8?
I think that's the same thing.
Admits they're fake.
2-8.
Yeah, that's the same one.
All right, let's get back to the beginning here.
Fox News is done.
We all hate Fox News.
Agreed?
We agree to dump them.
Fuck them.
We'll watch Tucker, but that's it.
And Dan Bongino put this is 1-7.
Dan Bongino put this out.
Look at this Chiron.
By the way, that's my least favorite word in the English language.
Chiron.
I even hate the way it's spelled.
I think it's C-H-R-Y-O-N.
I would be Chryon.
The Y comes first.
C-H-Y-R-O-N.
Ich.
Chiron.
Maybe if on Scrabble, if I just wanted to unload some letters, I might tolerate it.
Otherwise.
I thought this was a Chiron.
I am a Chiron.
Chirons are hot.
That's my fetish.
Guys would be talking about hot chicks they want to fuck, and I go, I want to fuck a Chiron.
What?
Blue.
Do they even have pussies?
Yeah, they have pussies.
They're green.
They're blue.
Oh, okay.
And scaly.
I'm calling.
You just don't look at the pussy or any of them.
They have three.
But I think you're supposed to fuck the middle one for babies, the one on the right for fun, and then the one on the left to punish them if they don't do the dishes.
A punish hole?
A punish hole.
That's pretty cool.
Lie on your back.
You're getting your punish hole fucked.
That just gave me a boner for you.
Write a song about that, B-R-B-Cash.
Yeah.
Throat babies, punish hole.
Throat babies.
So look at the lower third here.
Fox News confirms George Soros is majority owner of the new social platform Parlor.
What?
What?
That's just a lie.
This is a fucking bullshit.
And by the way, I don't think Bongino owns Parlor.
No, he doesn't.
He's a major investor in Parlor.
Maybe he has 51% and that's why he says he owns it.
By the way, I have been texting John Matzy for, I'd say, two years now, saying, you're going to be so fucking rich.
Holy shit, you're going to be rich.
Hold on to your ownership.
You're going to be rich.
So maybe he didn't listen to me and let someone invest 51%.
But I've sent him things I want, like various Rolexes, boats, the new tricked out Range Rover with every feature imaginable, a $5,000 driver that has gold in it.
Can we trust Matzy?
This Matzy guy?
Who is he?
John Matzy?
Yeah.
He's the CEO.
He's the creator of Parlor.
Right.
So what do you mean trust?
What's he doing?
I don't know.
What's he got up his sleeve?
What are you talking about, Ryan?
Show yourself.
Do you think he sold it to Soros?
No.
How do we know we could trust this guy?
He doesn't even know who Arnold Schwarzenegger is.
Yes, he knows nothing about pop culture.
I forgot about that.
We were going to have a regular feature where we called him and said things like, who's Questlove?
Right.
Yeah.
Who's Jimmy Fallon?
What is twerking?
What's Jimmy Fallon?
What's Twerking?
Who's Marilyn Monroe?
Can we get him?
Yeah, let's get him on the show.
We should get him on the show and do the Soros thing, too.
Yeah, do you know who George Soros is?
No, is that a fucking movie star?
He owns you, bitch.
In the Proud Boys news, we have this Million MAGA march that censored.tv will be at.
Chilloo.
Chilloo.
We're going to be there.
Caravans of Trump Supporters and Proud Boys are planning to descend on DC this weekend.
Descend.
Proud Boys will probably be 4% of the people there or less.
But the media is pushing it to make it sound extremist because Proud Boys' name is mud.
They're Nazis.
We don't have to worry about smearing them anymore.
We did a great job.
So if you can make anything a Proud Boy event, it becomes a Nazi event.
Now it has no credibility.
So if DC is mobbed, then they go, yeah, it's mobbed with all the Nazis.
These are the people we're Trying to get rid of.
And then you go, oh, okay, it's stupid.
Then I hate it.
It's another Charlottesville.
But the truth is, it's going to be huge.
And it's an Infowars thing.
It started, it's Owen Troyer.
It started in Austin at the InfoWars office.
It's Infowars Vehicles.
Yeah.
That big tank thing?
Yeah, there it is.
InfoWars.
Which is awesome.
That lady will be there.
Great.
She's going to be there yelling.
Daily Mail.
Daily Mail is Murdoch, and he is why they're left wing.
And Fox News is Murdoch, and they are why it's left wing.
I thought this was kind of annoying.
This hurt my feelings.
I've always said, every time I see a Sikh, I go, you make me Sikh.
And they always laugh.
And we've always been very pro-Sikh here.
Remember the Janta boys or whatever?
Velijanta.
Velijanta.
We're pro-Sikh.
We love their religion.
It's about beating people up who are being mean.
They carry daggers to stab rapists.
They're awesome.
And we have tons of Sikhs in it, especially the UK.
I think one of the top guys at Prowboys UK is a Sikh.
He's not like wearing the turban and everything, but that's his background.
By the way, the woman who spat in that cop's face has a Sikh name, Singh.
They're all named Singh for some reason.
And check this out.
So the head of the NDP, which is the leftist eco-Green New Deal party in Canada, is Sikh.
It's very normal to be Sikh, by the way, in Canada.
It's not a thing.
Like, no one goes, oh, my word.
If you go to the airport, everyone, every single person there checking your passport is Sikh because they like, you know, security type jobs.
Because that's their culture.
They're the warrior tribe.
Earlier this year, the Proud Boys, a right-wing extremist group that promotes white supremacist views, you can just say that now?
Made international headlines after being bolstered.
No, that didn't happen either, by Donald Trump.
Its founder is from Canada.
Okay, so that's kind of a tenuous tie, but say the top part was true.
Is the founder still around?
Is he in Canada now?
This isn't only a problem in the United States.
In Canada, there are 300 active far-right extremist groups operating across the country right now.
I sent this to Ezra and I was like, 300?
Really?
And Ezra goes, I think, you know what they're doing?
I think they're taking every Twitter account where someone said, like, I don't like Jews, and made that one.
So it's like 300 far-right people operating across the country.
Maybe it's just one guy tweeting 300 times.
Yeah, all of his tweets count.
You're a group.
Here are some additional facts, just like the facts you just heard.
Wrong, irrelevant, wrong.
Canada has seen a 200% increase in active hate groups in the last five years.
Yeah, because there's probably a 200% increase in hate monitors.
And you got to get high on your own supply.
You got to come up with something.
Criminal and hate-motivated incidents reported to police rose by more than 60%.
Yes, because there's more groups that take these fucking calls.
In 2018, the federal government's own report identified that right-wing extremism poses a threat to Canadian society.
How much of a threat?
Well, we don't have to get into that.
It's just a threat.
Hate and far-right ideology, what's the difference, spread like fire online, and Canada has been slow to tackle this issue.
And then they get, okay, give me some proof.
Well, there was the Christchurch attacks in New Zealand.
What?
Okay.
Do you know how fucking far it is to New Zealand?
Is it even possible to do a direct flight from Toronto to New Zealand?
Like, can a plane have that much fuel?
It's got to be a 30-hour flight.
You could get on a plane to New Zealand, bring two bottles of wine, get shit-faced, pass out for eight hours, wake up, be hungover, nurse your hangover, have some juice, have some fruit juice from now on.
Fall in love.
Fall in love with me.
Start a family.
Make a baby.
Then sober up, not have a hangover, have a big dinner, watch a movie, get drunk again, retire, and do all that again.
And you'd be landing.
I did that.
I don't know if it's.
On the flight back from Beijing once, we were allowed to bring our own bottles of wine for some reason.
So I had a knapsack full of wine.
I couldn't have a fake gun, a fake starter gun, a Chinese starter gun that didn't work, wasn't real, in my checked luggage in case I go down below and grab it.
But I could have two bottles of wine.
So I got totally plastered and did what I just told you.
Anyway, that's pretty far away, dudes.
New Zealand's pretty far fucking away.
You can't use it as a reason we have to.
On November 10th, Jagmeat.
I feel betrayed by Jagmeat.
Jagmeat, that's the meat right here behind the ear on the pig.
Oh.
Tasty.
I feel betrayed by Jagmeat because he's the head of the NDP in Canada.
I thought we were all, everyone was on the same page with Sikhs.
And no one dislikes Sikhs.
I hate seeing Indians talk about racism.
Indians do better than whites in America, in Canada, in both places, in Britain.
They're doing great.
Whites, by the way, are number seven of the ethnic success groups.
If you look at the successful ethnic groups in America, whites are down to number seven.
You've got Japanese and Lebanese and Indian, Bangladesh, Sikh, all above us.
All doing great.
Coming here with nothing.
I saw a PragerU video the other day where they go, if America's so racist, why are 3 million blacks coming here every year?
2 million from Africa and 1 million from the Caribbean?
Isn't it a horrible place to be?
No.
You know that if you bust your ass, you'll make money here.
Unlike Africa.
Poo-poo.
Speaking of de poo-poo, Stevie Wonder hates us too.
Oh, what?
Yeah.
Stevie Wonder slams Trump over Proud Boys and coronavirus at rally with Biden and Obama.
We got a situation going on because someone didn't handle their business right.
One of my favorite records is Little Stevie Wonder.
It's when he's 12 and he's playing the harmonica and piano, and it's fucking amazing.
I can do a whole thing on my record collection hating me.
So I got Stevie Wonder now, Sonic Hughes Thurston Moore, Talib Quelly.
These are all bands I used to love.
Public Enemies Chuck D blew up my head in a video when he was working with Rage Against the Machine, another band I used to like.
And the singer of Operation Ivy told me I suck shit.
Does the guy who.
Wait, what about the Pitbull guy?
That's not for the same reason, but.
What are you talking about?
The guy who was in that band with the Pitbull and couldn't come over and.
Buzzcock.
Oh, Tony Buzzcock.
That's for a different reason.
Nah, that's different.
What about the Birds of Prey or the...
What was it?
The Somethings of Rock and Roll?
God, your brain is a piece of garbage.
You know what I'm talking about?
No, the Somethings of Rock and Roll.
Oh, the Eagles of Death Metal?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
There's, well, those are like friends who stopped being my friends.
That's kind of a different category, but there's Jesse from DFA slash Mastercraft.
Right.
Yeah, okay, I know him.
And then there's the dude from Egos of Death Metal.
Those guys haven't really set out to hurt me, though.
Those are just guys who didn't have my back and threw me in the middle of the day.
Have not hurt me.
They have not hurt me.
No, I'm not going to count that.
I'm counting only attacks.
Is that him?
Steve Wonder.
Singapore.
Oh, you play bongos too?
Everything.
Now I want you to clap your hands.
Come on.
Everybody.
Yeah.
I want you to clap your hands, stomp your feet, jump up and down, do anything that you want to do.
Someone just shows up.
We are.
Yes.
We're doing it.
You're blind.
I don't see you.
Audio is obviously not the greatest quality.
This song is slamming.
It's like death metal.
And then when he comes back in with the full band, stop doing this.
You're not giving it justice.
Look up 12-year-old Stevie Wonder and get one with audio.
So we have the video.
But that's the song, too, that I was thinking of.
Fucking incredible.
And apparently he said, the legendary singer invoked the president's words to the Proud Boys at the first presidential debate when he told the group to stand back and stand by.
And Wunder said, you know what we say in the ghetto when somebody says that, right?
Watch yourself.
Get your ass whooped.
Did you watch yourself?
Wait, what are you doing?
I'm doing something while you look up that thing.
Jump up and down and do anything that you want to do.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's not doing it justice.
You have to listen to it at home on a booming stereo.
But I think it's funny, too, that Stevie Wonders hates the Prowboys.
Oh, good.
Let's put him in the foreground.
Stevie Wonder hates Jews.
He's on a box set that Farrakhan put out along with Snoop Dogg.
Farrakhan is an anti-Semite.
He sees them as termites who need to be exterminated.
Laura Loomer pointed this out.
But it's okay.
The enemy of my enemy is my friend.
So I'll ignore your anti-Semitism if you promise to shit on the Proud Boys.
By the way, the guy who wrote that is...
Oh no, sorry, that's a different article.
Louis Farrakhan, releasing new home, Stevie Wonder, Common and Snoop Dogg.
Didn't I tell you I hated Common?
I always hated that fucker.
I hate his wisdom.
Hi, I'm Common.
I'm so wise.
Really?
Have you read a book in your fucking life?
Mr. Wise?
He's doing all these commercials for IBM.
Yo, the mind is a terrible thing to taste.
We all have to rise above our passions and devour, eat the information around.
Shut the fuck up.
Ugh.
Remember he did that commercial.
Really real.
It was a commercial about how Real He is and how he sees a statue of himself and he's like, no, man, I'm a real dude.
I don't like statues.
I don't ride in a limousine.
You're in a Coca-Cola commercial right now, you cunt.
How the fuck is Coca-Cola doing a rap video about how they never sell out?
Did you do the commercial for free?
Fucking common.
The real time.
Really real.
Really real.
You got to show it now.
I assumed you were looking it up.
It's Maya and Common being really real.
Oh, I gotta get real!
Oh, yeah, I remember this.
This was back when it was like so hot.
Seven commercials.
That guy's a sellout.
I'm not.
That guy does Coca-Cola commercials.
I don't.
Oh, wait, I'm in one.
That guy's got shades.
I ain't trying to be famous.
I ain't trying to sell out.
That's what's up.
You're in a Coca-Cola commercial.
Are you blind?
Something about mainstream?
Look, and she doesn't do fame.
She's winding up the window of her fucking limousine.
No, thanks.
I'm a real...
I'm a real hypocrite.
Are you ready to go to the next level?
No, man.
I don't do shit like that.
What do you think I'm going to do?
A Coca-Cola commercial right now?
As we speak?
Okay, enough, enough, enough.
Oh, Kamandal, that's taking it too far.
We did COVID already, but we forgot to cover...
My fucking notes, I have to print them out in a size 8 font, so I keep missing shit.
This would be six pages, and I'm so cheap, I don't want to waste the ink.
My Scottish background is hurting the show.
I have hurt you today.
I thought this was awesome, though, 2-4.
Ball Sonaro, our favorite person.
The headline's misleading.
He didn't say fags.
He said worse than that.
That's like saying niggs.
He said the worst N-word, niggers, but with gays.
I regret the deaths.
I really do.
But we're all going to die someday.
There's no use fleeing reality.
We have to stop being a country of fags.
We have to face up to it and fight.
I hate this faggot stuff.
Foo, hard tea.
Went with the hard tea.
I hate this faggot stuff.
I wish I could hear that.
I wish I spoke Spanish.
That could have been a video drop.
Portuguese.
We have a new video drop, right?
Are you done it yet?
Oh, yeah.
Let's see it.
Ask me how I'm doing.
How are you doing, Ryan?
Now be fucking good, you fucking rat scumbag.
Fucking fag.
I have a short one just in case, you know.
You know, just to comment if things are not fucking good.
No, no, no.
No, it's all about the fig.
New Yorkers deserve the Nobel Peace Prize in saying the word fig.
Fig.
Fig.
It's hysterical.
What else is new?
Should we jump into Election Gate?
We cert could.
We cert could.
Well, let's not.
Let's show some more fun stuff.
In Racism Today, the Burger King guy is back.
I don't know if you remember the Burger King guy.
He calls people N-words when he gets on the plane.
And it never goes well, believe it or not.
For no reason.
He called N-word.
Yeah.
Yeah, we all heard him.
That's what I said when I was speaking to myself.
Bye-bye.
Where is he always traveling to, this mentally deranged man?
You'll notice he's always on black flights.
Maybe that's flights now, though.
Like, remember when we went to, where was it, Vegas?
Yep.
The entire plane was soul plane.
2-1.
And it got pretty intense because there was a huge container downstairs of snakes that got loose.
And they seemed to have some sort of hormone, spheromones, that they had sniffed.
And they were going all over the plane.
Well, Jamaica's called family expression.
Does he say it again?
Swing your braids all over.
It's got COVID all over it.
Don't swing your braids on me.
Please don't swing your COVID all over it.
Don't swing your COVID on me, okay?
I'm sitting right here.
Don't swing your COVID on me.
Thank you very much.
You're welcome.
Thank you.
Who is this guy?
Does he have a bunch of Burger King hats?
Or is he just very careful with that one?
They can't age well, right?
No.
You've got to get forehead sweat on them.
Chrissy Teigen was able to wear one for about 10 minutes before it just melted away.
Looked like a headband.
What did you think was going to happen?
Like you call a black person the M-word and they go, nah, you're right.
Look at that plane.
He eats the poo-poo.
Okay, so watch the other one.
So let's show you the original one that put him on the map.
I don't know what map this is.
Crazy asshole who yells racial epithets.
Man wearing Burger King hat yells N-word on jet blue flight.
More like a jet black flight.
Am I right, folks?
Loading.
Where is 25A?
What is his tattoo?
Because he has a face tattoo.
My seat!
Where is 25A?
Where is 25A?
Why does she just knee me in the stomach?
Excuse me, I'm Port West African.
You can say fucking time, My York!
Thank you!
Tell me, shut the f ⁇ out!
I want a lawsuit!
I want a fucking lawsuit!
Right now!
He's wearing the same shirt.
Oh, yeah.
Look at this guy.
He's just got to get a punch in.
Look, they all want to kick his ass.
Look, instant violence, as Anthony Kumi noticed.
Are they proving was fired for noticing?
Kick that bitch off the plane!
Sir, please you just.
Oh, that guy's face is problematic.
I like the way he smiles and looks at the next person, like the next person's gonna go, you're doing great.
Great point.
Who you said it nailed to?
Kyle Chapman?
I'm pretty sure you get a frown from everyone else.
Please, you need to stop.
There are no friends.
Stop.
Hey, that's not necessary.
I'm very pro-free speech, but I understand you're wanting that guy to get the fuck off the plane.
Speaking of what's a who's its face, who claims he's the leader of the Proud Boys.
Now, can't, because of the bylaws, can't he be sued for misrepresenting the brand, the LLC?
Sure, right?
It's not an LLC, though.
Well, whatever it is.
Racism, 2-9.
I mean, we already covered that.
Kyle Chapman is saying that he's taking over the Proud Boys.
He's calling them the Proud Goys, and they're going to become an anti-Nazi, I mean, an anti-Jew thing.
And Laura Loomer asked me about it.
The New York Times asked me about it.
I think suing would be a great thing to be like, actually, let me sue that guy.
Yeah, I should.
I should sit down.
I should allot like $20,000 to lawyers.
That's what Ezra Levant does.
That's what James O'Keeffe does.
And they're just sitting there sending out letters all day.
I guess I should do that.
I'll see you in court.
And does it really make a difference?
Like, no one, I called Enrique.
I go, is this thing gaining legs?
And he goes, no, I made a statement, a bunch of media.
They don't care.
They can tell he's nuts.
So it's already dead.
Okay.
So that story is already, the proud boy thing has already begun and ended.
If I sent the lawyer letter, I'm still paying for that.
It's still going through the courts.
We're still blah, blah, blah.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
I just thought it would be a good thing to cite when they were like, well, what about when they announced that they were blah, blah, blah?
I'd be like, actually, that guy got sued.
And then it's just.
Yeah, but I say that with the SPLC.
That doesn't work out.
People go, you start a hate group.
Actually, he's suing them.
Remember the woman in USA Today?
She said, yeah, I heard that they had filed a motion to dismiss.
That was ages ago.
Everyone does that.
And that failed.
Yeah.
So, you know, did suing the SPLC stop the hate group thing or even the press citing it as a source?
No, it didn't.
All right, what's this other one in racism?
The why of things.
Well, that's what's next, I think.
Yeah.
2-9.
So remember this guy?
We made fun of him?
He talked about how basically we're all racist and we have to recognize that.
And his tone is, I'm not mad at you.
You didn't have slaves, but you have to understand that I am still hurt by slavery.
He calls it the wake, like the wake of a boat.
And he goes, You still experience all this privilege.
Matthew McConaughey wants to get there.
Matthew McConaughey is reading from a script during this sit-down, which is amazing.
It must have gotten mixed up with a movie that he's done, like a movie script, because he quotes, apparently the why of things is from a movie, right?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Hopefully promote more conversations and it'd be a whole lot cooler if we weren't racist.
He's pretending he's saying it spontaneously as he reads it.
Oh my.
So corny.
It's a table reading.
So embarrassing.
And what I hate about this dude, what's his name again?
Something.
He's got like an African name.
Emmanuel Acho.
Acho.
He says, you know, a white person kills a black man and he gets off scot-free.
The police forgive him.
Now, of course, there's black on black crime.
Those people go to jail.
They're prosecuted for that.
What?
Says who?
Like, he just says stuff that he wants to be true.
75 to 80% of black on black crime goes totally uninvestigated, unpersecuted, unanythinged.
Because detectives go to the hood and they go, hello, ma'am.
There was a shooting right in front of your house yesterday.
Did you see anything?
I ain't seen nothing.
Click.
What's she going to do?
He said, yeah, I know.
It was one of the top bloods in the neighborhood.
His name is Dorel Sanche.
Weird last name, but I guess he's mixed.
Sanchez.
Sanche.
He made his own last name.
It's S-A-N-C-H with an accente gu.
Like Shea Guevara.
Accente gu.
Man, I was telling you, I'm big on values, and I feel him deteriorating.
He pretends he's thinking it, and then he has to look at his notes again.
That's embarrassing.
You fucking loser.
I thought you would cut to his camera while I'm losers sit down and have a ridiculously insincere conversation.
It's just like Rhea and her ex-wife.
Which one's Rhea?
I keep getting powerful.
You put me on the spot.
Wow.
I keep getting.
What did he put him on the spot with?
How many unarmed blacks are shot by cops every year?
Racism stays the same.
Too many.
That's the answer.
Too many.
How can I do better as a white man?
That's powerful.
That's how you put it.
You put me on the spot.
I'm going to be honest with you because that's what we're here for, to have uncomfortable conversations.
You have to acknowledge that there's a problem so that you can take more ownership from the zero problem.
Zero ownership, zero recognition.
How about you recognize there's a problem, dude?
How about you recognize there's a problem with crime in the black community, with violence in the black community, with fatherlessness in the black community?
How about you focus on that?
And then I'll come over and apologize for what someone did to you.
Your ancestors 400 fucking years ago took me.
My Yeti mug is black.
I think this is a good start.
I got my boots.
So anyway, I bring that up because he sat down with Oprah.
Like, he's a hit.
And his basic thrust is, and this is sort of the liberal thrust, the BLM thrust.
It's, look, you're not a bad person, but you have to understand that everything you have is stolen and everything I don't have was also stolen from me.
So just acknowledge that you cheated and let's work together for you to somehow make, I'm not saying reparations, but maybe that is it.
To make some sort of accommodations for the sins of the past.
Because we are still suffering today and you're still benefiting today.
And to that I say bull shit.
Bullshit.
I'm a proud Western chauvinist.
I refuse to apologize for inventing the modern world.
Yes, you had it rough for a while.
So did we.
The Scots were under siege from the English for 700 years.
The Irish were slaves.
The Irish were slaughtered by the English, starved to death like Holodomor.
We've had slave revolts in Britain.
White slaves revolting.
What was his name?
William Tell or something like that?
So when you talk about the horrible background you have and how rough it was, you sound like a pussy.
Because we all went through that.
And we don't carry, like, the Irish don't talk about the English and how they were starved to death.
They don't carry that around like shackles.
You're shackling yourself.
Anyway, so Chelsea Handler is a well-trained doggie, and she recognizes.
So this is a great example of the way they want this conversation to go.
And when I say they, I mean the alt-left, BLM, Antifa, liberals, DNC.
This is how we're supposed to act.
I'm the beneficiary of a ton of privilege.
But you didn't grow up with money because so many people would counter that, well, I didn't grow up with money.
My parents had to work hard.
I am not privileged.
Right.
What would they be to that?
I would say that I was under that impression, too.
I thought white privilege meant the Rockefellers or, you know, or you had a legacy family that goes to Harvard or Yale or Stanford.
What percentage of the rich population is that?
Old money rich.
It's not a thing.
Like in Britain, it's a thing.
They have a certain accent.
And we'll argue that another day.
That's a whole other ball of fish.
But America, ball of fish.
America in Canada are nouveau rich.
The rich are nouveau.
That's why they all have the same accent because they're brand new to this.
That's why they're so tacky.
That's why they look like, what's his name in Caddyshack?
I was going to say Dan Aykroyd.
What the fuck's his name?
Rob Eddie Gingerfield, yeah.
What were your benefits that you got?
What were these magic gifts you were handed just because you were white that you wouldn't have got if you were black?
Understand how granular it is.
You know, just the advantage of going into a grocery store, if I want to take some candy and eat it while I'm walking down the aisle, I'm not going to be a problem.
No one's going to say anything to me.
And I have the confidence that I do it all the time.
Like, you know, I started to think about the variation.
If you're at a grocery store and some rich white lady comes in and she's eating the candy, you've probably seen a pattern.
And the pattern is these women tend to buy a lot of stuff and it tends to be worth it for me to take it on the chin.
Maybe the same grocer has noticed that when the black kids from the local public school come in, they tend to eat candy and run out the door and I never make my money back, and I get more shoplifting.
So the beef is not with racism.
The beef is with the thieves who generated this true pattern in the first place.
I just saw a video in Chipotle where they refused to serve these black kids unless they paid in advance.
Was that racism?
No.
The kids were consistently getting a whole burrito, grabbing it, and running out the door.
And eventually the manager said, I'm putting a stop to this.
I had a store.
Vice had a store on Lafayette Street in New York.
And black kids would come up, they'd come in, and they would grab like thousands of dollars of clothes and run out.
And by the time the cops got there, they're obviously long gone.
So we had a put a doorbell in where you go, eh, and we look outside and go, hmm, seems reasonable.
And we push the little, okay, come on in thing.
So is that prejudice to notice a pattern?
Be mad at the pattern makers.
Hi.
Of what it means when I get pulled over by a police officer versus you getting pulled over by a police officer.
I've gone off on police officers when they pulled me over, telling them that they have no right.
Like this was before I was famous, just living in New Jersey.
You can't give me a ticket.
You don't know who my father is.
Meanwhile, my father was a used car dealer.
I didn't even know what I was talking about.
My father couldn't do anything.
But I just had such entitlement because I had grown up as a product of my own culture.
White privilege doesn't mean you don't work for multiple jobs or that.
Like, stop.
I remember seeing this white guy go, I had a gun in my car.
It was illegal.
And the cop didn't stop me.
Or I think he saw it and he didn't care.
He didn't ask for my registration on it or anything.
And I was watching it.
I couldn't talk to the guy because I was looking at a video.
But I was thinking, did you go home and then do crimes with it?
Or did you put it away?
So the cop's hunch was correct.
Like Jay-Z in 99 Problems, he talks about how the glove compartment is locked.
You need a warrant for that.
And I have this permit and that permit.
And he's talking to the cop about how racist he is.
And then, like an album before, he's talking about how he was slinging dope and selling crack.
And he's an awesome drug dealer.
So the cop that pulled over Jay-Z in the next album, he was one album off.
But his hunch was correct.
And as far as like yelling at cops go, when it's some teenage girl, you know that it's not going to lead to anything but her getting a fucking DUI or whatever.
When it's a huge black dude like him, the pattern is, holy shit, I didn't remember this.
It's your boy Hova.
When was this?
I killed people.
1999?
No, that says, it says back in 99.
Oh, that's him getting arrested back in 99.
I see.
Oh, murder happened in 99.
Crack dealer, stabbing, record producer.
Yeah.
So the cops, you're not exactly an example, just like NWA, not only an example of a perfect angel the cops are hunting down.
So when you look at the statistics, a disproportionate number of deaths of cops are from black men between 18 and 35.
So cops are overly cautious with that particular demographic.
And to ignore that is to put the cops' life in jeopardy, which is why cops are quitting the NYPD in unprecedented numbers.
We are facing a massive police shortage soon.
We're seeing it in Minneapolis.
They're begging for cops to come back.
Cops are going, fuck you.
You told me to fuck off.
It's like when a girl cheats on you and you're so fucking mad and she goes from beautiful in your eyes to a piece of utter dog shit.
You notice all her flaws.
She becomes so disgusting.
It takes a little while, maybe about a month.
And then sometimes she wants you back or booty calls you and you're just like, oh, I almost touched my phone and she was like, you have no idea how disgusted we are.
I think women are the same way.
I've noticed actually when I try to get girls back after dumping them, I can tell there is not a snowball's chance in hell I'm getting back in those pants.
It's a self-preservation thing, I think.
But yeah, like the way they put their hands on things becomes gross.
Like everything fucking so long.
The way you breathe is fucking stinky.
Keep chewing, you fucking pig.
But let's hear a little bit more of this.
I just figured that this is pretty interesting, too, while on the...
He shot his drug addict brother at age 12.
His 16-year-old brother.
Why do cops keep picking on this guy?
So hold on.
His 12-year-old...
All right.
Drug addict brother.
But he was selling crack when he was 13.
So it's not like he was shooting his crack addict brother because he was such a good boy.
It's probably supplied his crack addicted sister, I believe.
And look how fair America is.
He's now worth half a billion dollars because he wrote some good songs that people like to dance to.
That's how nice we are as a society.
We forgive your sins, and if you create a product that people like, we reward you with half a billion fucking dollars.
Doesn't sound so racist to me.
Anyway, go back to Chelsea, fucking boring everyone to death.
Life, or that you've only had an easy life, or, you know, however you want to frame it.
So as long as you want to participating in the system and not trying to dismantle the system, then you are participating in racism, in a racist society, because that's what we are living in.
I've seen her, I follow her on Instagram.
I don't know why, but I've seen her reading these books about white fragility, and she's clearly memorized all the little lines, all the little slogans you're supposed to say.
Because I recognize it from the right.
And you can tell it's not her speaking as a person.
She's just saying the things.
Talk to white people who grew up in the Bronx, in Pelham, in Washington Heights, in East New York.
They got pulled over on a daily fucking basis.
Tommy Bags at my gym.
He goes, yo, God, I swear to God, I must have been pulled over 1,200 times every day.
And we weren't great kids.
You know, we weren't really doing crime.
Maybe selling a bit of weed here and there, having some weed honors.
But, you know, the cops were strict and we got picked on a lot because we were sort of the bad kids.
We didn't do that much crime, really, like maybe shoplifting here and there.
But, you know, I got thrown.
I can't tell you how many times I got thrown on a cop car.
That's life in the hood.
It's cops trying to regulate a high crime area.
It's not privileged to not be part of that move.
Big Jay Okerson said he was thrown violently onto a cop car for a parking thing.
He didn't pay a parking ticket.
Oh my God.
Thank God he's not black.
Or we'd be hearing about it for the rest of our lives.
Beneficiary.
We have a ton of privilege.
But you didn't grow up with money.
Wait, what are you doing back here?
Did you re-watch the whole thing?
Oh, I think it...
Oh, my Pullman.
Famous.
Father couldn't do anything.
Father's going to do anything.
But I just had such a long time.
It's 134, so we finished it.
Yeah, okay.
Oh, I sent you a fucking doozy.
Well, we'll get to that.
We'll get to that.
We'll get to that.
We've got to do a Trump thing.
This is going to be a long show.
Is that good or bad news for you folks at home?
Oh, let's do a Trump segment now.
We should start making things for all of these.
All bumpers?
Yeah.
We always do Trump, Racism, Feminism, Proud Boys.
Okay.
We got to do bumpers for all those.
Trump?
Well, dude, it's in your notes.
The things that are in all caps and bold.
Yeah, me and Hollow got to make a song.
We're looking for a challenge.
We're looking for a challenge.
Write songs for all of these.
Yeah.
All right, that's it.
Nobody's sending shit for that, please.
Because you undercutted us, and we are going to get together.
No, don't listen to him.
Try to beat them to the punch.
All right, let's have a look at it.
Mine is lazy and slow.
The competition is who can do the first.
Well, we already have a Proud Boy song.
It's not first, too.
We have a Proud Boy song, remember?
So fucking proud of your boy.
Yeah.
So that's that one already done.
Oh, well, let's have a competition, though.
Let's vote which one's better, not just the first one.
Okay, so folks at home, challenge for both a graphic video, Quickie thing, and the song for Proud Boys, Racism, Feminism.
Yes.
Trump.
Yes.
We already have Election Gate.
We already have the final video.
We already have the mailbag.
This is correct.
But Election Gate, final video, and mailbag, it gives you an idea of what we're looking for.
Somebody did make this.
Election fraud update, election fraud update.
This is the part of the show, the part of the show that's an election fraud update.
That's way better than yours.
I mean, I based mine on what you told me to do.
Whatever, Ryan.
I literally did.
You're like, no, no, no, no, that's not exactly what I want.
And then I made it exactly what you wanted.
Yeah, no, I fixed your shit pile.
But that is high quality.
That is high quality.
Okay, that's the new one.
But hey, sir, whoever made that, can you change it to Election Gate?
I guess I have to sing a song.
Go ahead.
Ready, set, go.
Election Gate is here to stay.
It's Election Gate, and it's not gay.
No, that's not.
You're sure?
Okay, yeah.
It's time.
Election Gate!
Election Gate!
I feel like gay and gate could be something.
You did that already.
That was the first one.
I know, but gay is such a big part of it.
I got it.
Okay, ready?
Yes.
It's not straight.
It's election gate.
Okay.
Yeah, because that's a gay joke, and it's not straight.
It's kind of wonky.
It's true.
Being straight.
Wait, don't pull up your shitty graphic.
Why?
Well, I did change it.
So this is our version of...
So the person at home, can you redo that?
Whoever sent that?
Do you know who sent that?
I'll find out.
How did you get sent it?
Via email.
Okay.
You actually saw it and replied to it, I believe, right?
I did.
I was probably drunk.
I was probably drunk.
Anyway, you don't have to find it now.
Right, right.
Put that in your notes.
So do you want to at least look at the one that I...
I mean, this is...
I had a different one.
Well, we're going to get to Election Gate so you can show yours.
Okay.
It's not the Election Fraud update.
No.
Wait, Ryan, stop.
We're obviously going to show that when we get to Election Gate.
Oh, I thought you...
Okay.
And didn't we show that yesterday?
Yeah, but this one has the gate instead of the election fraud.
Oh, wow.
What a huge difference.
It is different.
That guy, I want to hire him.
Hire him?
Because you stink.
It's just one card.
I mean, I'm all these cool graphics.
I've never seen you do a cool star thing like that.
I've done a star thing like that.
That's awesome.
And the stripes, like, that guy knows his shit.
You reek.
Look at that.
Come here, the fag zone.
That's hilarious.
Okay, let's jump to Trump.
I gotta admit, sometimes the left does some fuck you's that just sting.
Look how yellow my teeth are.
Ew.
Hi, I like coffee and cigarettes.
This guy, well, we'll just show the video 3-1, but wow.
I used to be confident and coffee.
Start from the beginning.
Every morning I grab an iced coffee and I talk to the president.
You didn't fucking lose because of voter fraud.
You lost because of black women, Latinx women, indigenous women.
They all did voter drives.
They got millions of people.
They never cared about politics in their entire fucking life to come out and fucking vote against you.
You lost because you're a white supremacist piece of shit.
And you're protecting a white supremacist piece of shit right now.
Lose like a fucking adult, not a fucking baby.
His adrenaline's pounding me.
He's trying to be cool now.
I never thought I'd be drinking iced coffee after last week, but I'm still drinking iced coffee.
Every morning I...
That was a little bet he had.
And a friend of ours greeted protesters recently with a get off my lawn song.
How dare you?
This music was not added in post.
This is happening.
And pure sign says Trump.
How dare you?
Isn't that awesome?
They don't obviously get the joke.
There's not a lot of get off my lawn fence in that crowd.
Here's a fun one.
And this is interesting because you've got to hear the way these kids talk.
It's so bizarre.
It's this really patronizing tone where they're like, don't do that.
Don't point a finger in her face.
And they're talking to a biker who I guess works at University of Wisconsin And he wants to get through and park his bike and they're like, No, you're not getting through because of racism.
People aren't allowed to go to work until racism is over.
This is obviously 3-3.
Video shows Trump supporter driving through a crowd of protesters on his motorcycle.
Uh-oh.
Link me, Daddy-O.
No, keep going.
That's him doing it.
No one got hurt.
They just held on to his bike and he pushed them out of the way.
Don't shoot the troll.
Okay, go to the other video.
The man is named Rich.
Yeah, this is it.
Listen to the way they talk.
What have we done to our kids?
We've turned them all into cunts.
Alright, so tell me, why are you blocking traffic?
Stop killing black people.
Who the fuck's killing black people?
I think black people are killing black people, aren't they?
I mean, statistically, right?
What?
Oh, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to step on your toes.
No, you know what?
I can't fit through there, and I'm going to scratch my bike.
If I can't get through there, I'm going to scratch my bike.
Perfectly logical.
Come here.
Get out.
Get out.
I can't fit through there.
I would.
I mean, I don't mind if you guys are part of this.
You've got a safety first for some yellow t-shirt on.
You pull yourself up as a representative.
Do not put your finger in her face like that.
That's the part I love.
Do not point your finger in her face like that.
This guy's a big, huge, beefy biker.
No, that's not happening on my watch.
Beefy biker.
What, like that?
Like that?
I can't hear you.
You know what?
Be careful.
That's an open primary.
It'll suck your little pigtails right in there.
It'll rip them right out of your head.
Sorry.
Now you're threatening violence, she says.
Who's the representative here?
Which one are you?
Alright, so what's your name?
My name is Rich.
Don't feed the troll, don't feed the trolls.
Look how weak they all are.
And that's fine.
It's okay to be a skinny ninny.
But being like a weak, beta male, gay pencil, and then all these cunty bitches all going up to some guy in a motorcycle and telling him how he's going to live his life and whether he can go to work or not.
That's the part that confuses me.
Where do they get the human?
This guy Trump on his bike, on his gas tank in Madison, Wisconsin?
Dude, you better park it somewhere you can see it at all times.
Oh, so they ended there, but you saw the other part where he just pushes through.
Yes.
Then he waves to them.
That is the hero America needs.
Also, we're about to get to our election gate footage and watch Ryan's shitty card that's way shittier than the one that the guy sent in.
But Chris Cuomo here is threatening us.
He's got a naughty list like Santa Claus.
Go down.
Just get to this.
I guess it's going to appear there.
And they're keeping a note of how we're behaving.
And we're in big trouble.
Chick.
Shame on them.
A wax museum is less cold-blooded than these people are.
And let them know they are going to lose shame.
I've been to a wax museum.
It's like 70 degrees than this election.
This matters.
What they're playing at now matters.
Isn't it weird how you're unhealthy if you're less than 98 degrees?
And if you were 70 degrees, you'd be dead because you'd just be frozen.
Yet 70 degrees is like this studio right now, and it feels pretty warm to me.
Yeah.
Isn't that funny?
We have to be burning hot to be normal.
I guess we're just burning all this energy.
We're hot.
Even when we're sleeping, we're steaming hot.
98 degrees is a scorcher.
Well, we're an engine, like everything else.
So if we're not scorching hot, we're sick.
And then if we're like two degrees off, 100, oh my God, get him to the hospital.
What weird creatures we are.
Sorry, go ahead.
This isn't tax, don't tax.
This isn't who lies, who doesn't lie.
This is what lies at the heart of our democracy, and they know it.
Hillary Clinton, say what you want, she promptly conceded, even though she spanked him in the popular vote.
Why?
Stop.
She also said that, and she didn't concede.
She had a huge problem with the election.
It says it was stolen, says it was all these different things.
She wouldn't shut up blaming different things for her losing.
She called it deplorables.
It was white supremacists' fault.
It was a million different things.
She did not concede.
And that was after a real count.
We're not down counting.
Georgia's going back to zero.
It's looking very good for Trump, as we'll learn when we get to Election Gate and show Ryan's horrible graphic that sucks shit.
Based on what you told me to do.
No, you showed me a piece of garbage and I said, well, let's make it this and this to fix it.
No, it would have taken too long.
So you said, well, let's just do a quick one.
I remember.
I will concede that you...
But that guy had just as much time as you.
That's what our system demands.
Other Democrats swiftly came to terms with Trump's victory.
Swiftly came to terms with the Trump.
It didn't came with Trump's victory.
But that's not the thing I was looking for.
He talks about...
Yeah, that's not it.
How did you add that?
My link has him saying, go back to the Gateway Pundit.
Wait, what did you click on?
So there was this one here.
And go back up.
That's it.
Maybe it's.
He went on to issue possible threats against lives.
Shame on them.
And let them know they're going to lose way more than the election.
Oh, maybe.
All right.
It's probably.
Oh, he probably said it when we miss it.
Okay.
Shame on them.
That's enough.
Enough, enough.
All right, now let's get to your terrible graphic that totally sucks and isn't as good as the one that the guy sent in.
As directed.
War.
It's got its own appeal, I guess.
It's different.
All right, here's my favorite thing, and I sent this to you.
It's not in the notes, but Trump just put this out on Twitter, and it is a game changer.
Right now, I'm too busy making America great again.
Get ready, folks.
Here's a doozer of a doozy.
Report.
So what time was this sent out?
Oh, I don't see it.
I like how Twitter has to put a little addendum at the bottom.
See the results, another info.
Don't read this.
Report.
Dominion.
Dominion is the software that was used almost exclusively by swing states, which is very curious.
And what we're discovering now is Dominion didn't just fuck up, but it switched Trump's to Biden's.
And we have a massive amount of votes to make up to win this.
But it's not like if, say, there's 500 votes that were taken from Trump and given to Biden, that's now a thousand difference.
So cut this massive number you need in half.
Because when there's a vote switch and Trump goes up, Biden also goes down.
That's the part people seem to be forgetting.
Dominion, the software, deleted 2.7 million Trump votes nationwide.
Data analysis finds 221,000 Pennsylvania votes switched from President Trump to Biden.
941,000 Trump votes deleted.
States using Dominion voting systems switched 435,000 votes from Trump to Biden.
Wow.
So go to this 3.6.
And this, what seems bad, which is Trump needs 20,000 in Wisconsin, 47,000 Pennsylvania, 12,000 Georgia, 14,000 Arizona, 36,000.
These are not margins that get undone in recounts.
Yeah, it wouldn't be so fast.
When there's a vote switch, those numbers are much smaller.
But before we get into real Election Gate, we should also confront some myths.
Because I think we're going to have a regular Election Gate feature on the site on censored.tv.
What am I doing this for?
And that should also include things that have been debunked.
For example, this $138 that went all to Biden, I was talking about how fucked up that was.
That does appear to be a glitch.
That does appear to be a clerical error.
No, that's not what I'm talking about.
I don't think I sent you a link for this.
So it looks like there's a clerical error that was quickly corrected, and we caught it because we were all staring at the counts and everything and thought it was a thing.
So that's not a thing anymore.
Also, that kid ripping up the ballots and throwing them behind his head, that also appears to have been a prank.
And finally, the stop counting thing.
I know PolitiFact isn't reliable, but I've seen this a few times.
This is 3.5.
It looks like the whole concept of stopped counting is not a thing.
Scroll down a bit.
They just got, wait, none of the states cited in the post stop counting votes.
Election officials in Fulton, in Georgia, briefly paused counting ballots after a pipe burst at a facility in Atlanta, North Carolina, stopped counting in-person votes once 100% of precincts were reported, but the state is still counting absentee ballots.
Delays in election results are due to influx of mail-in ballots, blah, blah, blah.
I'm willing to believe that.
Don't cancel your subscription, folks, because that's that, first of all, we have that Trump thing that debunks the numbers are too big.
We have a couple of things that were possibly misunderstandings.
Now I'm going to punch you in the stomach 300 times with win-win-win-win-win when it comes to Election Gate and our side.
Let's start with how sweet this will be when it's proven.
And that's Dinesh.
3-7.
He talks about a trifecta, I believe.
The beauty of this investigation is that if successful in uncovering systemic fraud, we bust the Democrats, the media, and digital sensors at the same time.
A triple fuck you.
Dinesh doesn't swear, so he says up yours.
All right.
3-8.
Dr. Shiva, MIT, math genius, invented email.
Says mathematics is how God reveals truth.
I believe that.
It's a skill you need to get four degrees at MIT.
My team has uncovered, without equivocation, a clear and undeniable pattern in Michigan.
We will be presenting the data shortly for everyone to see and judge for themselves.
How did Dr. Shiva do in the election?
Wasn't he running?
Yes.
Look that up later.
Secondly, 3-9, we have a lawsuit in play where I believe the president is suing.
Oh, here we go.
If you look at the recent lawsuit, and Mike Reid can get you the information on this lawsuit, let me just share.
An election employee with the city of Detroit working at a polling location for three weeks prior to the election, this city of Detroit employee directly observed on a daily basis other city of Detroit election workers and employees coaching voters to vote for Joe Biden and the Democrat Party.
This employee witnessed these workers and employees encouraging voters to do straight Democrat ballot and witnessed these election workers and employees going over to the voting booths with voters in order to watch them vote and coach them who to vote for.
During the last two weeks, while this same employee was working at the polling location, she was specifically instructed by her supervisors never to ask for a driver's license or any photo ID when a person was trying to vote.
And as absentee ballots that existed, all absentee ballots that existed were required to be input into the QVF system by 9 p.m. on November 3rd, 2020.
This was required to be done in order to have a final list of absentee voters who returned their ballots prior to 8 p.m. on November 3rd, 2020.
In order to have enough time to process the absentee ballots, all polling locations were instructed to collect the absentee ballots from the drop box once every hour, November 3rd.
On November 4th, 2020, a City of Detroit election worker was instructed to improperly predate the absentee ballots received date that were not in the QVF.
She was told to alter the information in the QVF to falsely show that the absentee ballots had been received in time to be valid.
The election employee also observed a large number of people who came into the satellite location to vote in person, but they had already applied for an absentee ballot.
These people were allowed to vote in person and were not required to return the mailed absentee ballot or sign an affidavit that the voter lost the mailed ballot.
Listen, here's the thing.
Why aren't you worried about these irregularities?
But no, this is a separate question, but it's a separate question, which is, if you are finding these irregularities, if you have an election worker being told to backdate ballots, that's a problem.
We're going to pursue all of this.
Is it going to be enough?
No, it's going to take time.
Is it going to be enough?
We don't know.
Is it going to take time?
Yes, it's going to take time.
Strange response.
So she says Detroit has all these irregularities, and they go, that's not enough to swear the election.
Are you a journalist?
Or are you working for the DNC?
It's the latter.
They are a PR firm for the DNC.
And then number 40, we have a poll watcher who saw go down.
What are you doing over there?
I'm trying to find this thing where it proved it was like we have the numbers of how many votes were injected.
They were the exact same numbers that were injected into Michigan and in Arizona at the same exact time.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I remember seeing that.
Fuck.
I want to find that, frankly.
The whistleblowers as well.
I was a poll challenger the night of the night that the vote was allegedly stolen.
I was a whistleblower down there in TCF Center in Detroit at the absentee voter accounting board.
And I actually witnessed when the 61 cases of mystery ballots showed up at the dead of night in a city elections van, no chain of custody.
The ballots had to be in by 8 p.m.
They showed up at 3.30 a.m.
So seven and a half hours.
Those ballots were in limbo.
We've got no answers.
And it's just coming out in the affidavits right now.
And I think once they're understood by the public, they're going to be shocked at this fraud.
And that's when I think that the wheels will really start turning and we'll have a really good chance of overturning all this evil things, all this evil stuff that's been perpetrated on our nation.
I'm one of the whistleblowers.
Awesome.
Now, speaking of whistleblowers, the story with the Project Veritas postal worker is he recanted.
Changed his mind.
No, I didn't see any irregularities.
Which people don't really do unless they've been coerced, right?
Well, Project Veritas could be Election Gate TV.
It could be EG TV.
If you just go to there at any time during all this, you'll see.
Wait, is that 401?
Yes.
Wait, yeah, but Donald Trump Jr. retweeted it there, but I could probably get it right from Veritas.
Just go to 401.
Oh, yeah, Project Veritas has recordings of Fed agents intimidating this mailman.
Given what Feds tried to do to my family, this shouldn't surprise anyone, but should disgust everyone.
This is what we've been up against since day one.
Which is what a lot of people are saying.
Like, didn't he know they were going to fuck us over?
I am the postal employee who came out and put on the EREPA Postal Service Postal Office.
I am right at this very moment looking at an article written, written by Washington Post.
It says that I fabricated the allegations of ballot tampering.
May I say that I did not recant my statements?
That did not happen.
That is not what happened.
And you will find out tomorrow.
And I would like that the Washington Post recant their wonderful little article that they decided to throw off.
So he's since gone to Project Veritas and explained what happened.
And he was basically duped.
And this is what they do.
This is how the feds work.
They make you say something.
Wait, it was Thursday?
Well, it was so late at night.
It was Wednesday, I guess, like right before midnight.
Oh, so that's not Thursday.
Thursday starts at 12.01.
If it was 11.59, it was Wednesday.
And you go, okay, so you were wrong.
Well, yeah, I was wrong.
And then it was, guy admits he was wrong.
Or lied to the FBI.
Like in Roger Stone's case, they said, did you get an email from Julian Assange?
No.
Yeah, you did.
You just lied.
Well, sort of.
Actually, that's not even sort of.
A lie is knowing something to be true.
Ryan's name is Ryan and saying, Ryan's name is Pechunya.
That's a lie.
It's a cute name, though.
They were grilling the hell out of me.
How are you feeling right now?
I'm kind of pissed.
I feel like I just got played.
And I heard him say to the supervisor that they messed up yesterday.
So I was like, oh, what did they mess up on?
And he told the supervisor that they had postmarked one of the ballots for the fourth instead of the third because they were supposed to put them for the third.
So is he going to be permanently unemployed now?
And so let me make good on that promise right away.
This storm is getting crazy, right?
And it's out of a lot of people's control.
And so the reason they called me in is to try to harness that storm, try to reel it back in before it gets really crazy.
Because we have senators involved, we have the Department of Justice involved, we have all the lawyers' teams got in the whole of me.
I'm not...
Well, I am actually.
I am trying to twist you a little bit because in that, believe it or not, your mind will kick in.
We like to control our mind, and when we do that, we can convince ourselves of a memory.
But when you're under a little bit of stress, which is what I'm doing to you purposely, your mind can be a little bit clearer.
And we're going to do a different exercise, too, to make your mind a little bit clearer.
But this is all on purpose.
Roger.
I'm not scaring you, but I am scaring you here.
It seems like they were trying to.
Hey, go back.
I'm not scaring you, but I am scaring you.
Take me out of the equation.
Roger.
I'm not scaring you.
That's perfect.
Stop, stop, stop.
That's perfect.
I got to take a picture of that.
How Orwellian is that?
Holy shit.
I am not scaring you, but I am scaring you.
That's the best.
Holy shit.
That's fucking awesome.
I'm not twisting your arm, but I am twisting it.
Well, what is it?
It's everything.
It seems like they were trying to make me distrust y'all.
And at the same time, it kind of affected, but at the same time, I was like, no, these guys have had my back since the get-go.
So that's why I continued.
Do you think these federal agents have your back?
At this point, no.
Do you think these federal agents are really interested in investigating fraud?
Honestly, I don't think they are.
And in fact, you heard Weisenberg tell a supervisor they were backdaying the ballots to make it appear they've been collected November 3rd.
You still stand by that?
Yeah.
Yes.
He said Reisenberg and the text said Risen back.
That's the kind of thing that fucking drives me nuts.
I mean, we're talking about major crimes here in the entire nation and someone made a typo.
That pisses me off.
I found the thing.
We have evidence of the same number of ballots or the same number of votes being injected into the Wisconsin system and the Michigan system three different times.
I think there were two different injections of exactly the same numbers in Michigan and then in Milwaukee.
It happened three times.
That's pretty big.
Spooky.
Let's go to some more good news with Sarah Huckabee Sanders post, 44.
In Georgia Ballots where the voter only voted for the president, Trump, 818.
As I keep saying, you drove to the polling station, you parked your car, you got time off work, you waited in line, you showed your ID or not, in the case of Detroit.
You go there, you're finding your little booth.
This is what you devoted your whole day to.
You do this every four years.
It's a big deal.
It's very, very rare that someone would just check the president box and turn around and walk out.
You might as well just like, I'm a Republican.
I haven't heard of these people.
I'm just going to do Republican, Republican, Republican.
Oh, I have heard of that guy.
I actually like that guy better.
I'm going to do Democrat.
Why would you just do the one box?
So it did happen 818 times out of however many votes there were.
Biden got it 95,000 times.
I mean, when you get into probability, this is mathematical proof that the ballots for Biden were fake.
Ballots where the voter voted for president and at least one other race, Trump 2.4, Biden 2.3, that mathematically makes sense.
The votes where you just checked off the president and nothing else are obviously fraudulent, should be thrown out.
Or at least, they're usually below 1,000.
Not...
How many was it?
25,000?
Pull it back up.
Pull it back up, Mr. Slow-Mo.
95,000.
Almost 100,000.
That's amazing.
And then Dominion, this software, that's going from a, it started as, that was just a glitch, to, it's not a glitch that made any difference, to, okay, it was a big glitch that made a difference, but we're not going to, what, you want to do a whole new election now?
It happened.
What does it say there?
An analysis of election night data from all states shows millions of votes either switched from President Trump to Biden or were lost using Dominion and other systems.
And now show those three tweets I sent you, or they're next in the list.
1002 and the.
Kevin McCulloch.
For those of you that who contacted me, Kevin, saying it's not a glitch, it's a design, turns out you were right.
Code experts now breaking down the Dominion voting systems have discovered that a feature in the system is that cast votes can be switched out for manual ones.
Next.
Whistleblowers from Dominion coming forward and yet again confirming what we already know.
A, Trump won by a landslide on November 3rd.
B, the Democrats are traitors who abused our election process in a coup to overthrow our president.
And by the way, go back.
That's not just some random crazy bitch.
That's a politician.
U.S. Senate candidate.
Delaware.
Right?
In Delaware, in Biden's hometown, home state.
Well.
Next.
Ryan Fournier.
Whistleblowers from Dominion have come forward.
Big news.
Trump was right all along.
That brings us back to the original thing.
Hell yeah.
And here's a weird thing.
So go to 4.6.
Some woman catches these guys loading up a bunch of votes after the state has been called.
Ballots?
I thought they collected them all.
I just want a document.
Wait, but how come they already called the state?
Are you collecting some of the other places?
Thank you guys.
Are you guys officially election points?
Alright, and let me just ask you one thing.
Where do you guys take them?
Election stuff.
Seems kind of suspicious, doesn't it?
Okay.
So anyway, that post comes with a disclaimer where it says you need context.
They don't have the context.
And the context is, although it was after November 3rd, they were still counting mail-in ballots and other ballots.
Yeah, you haven't debunked shit, bitch.
Look at the 4-7.
We didn't say that you can't be counting votes after November 3rd.
We understand there's mail-ins and other stuff like that.
Our problem is that the state had already been called.
This is Los Angeles, County Registrar Recorder, County Clerk's Office.
So our problem isn't you counting votes.
My problem is you calling the state or the county before you were done counting the votes.
That is the beef.
And that hasn't been debunked.
And you'll notice that with a lot of the debunking, they'll do what the FBI does.
There'll be one detail that's a little off, and that means the whole thing is a myth.
Sorry, what matters is the crux of her video, which is, why did you call that county before the votes were counted?
And where there's smoke, there's fire.
Okay, I think we're done.
What were you just showing Hillary for?
We're talking about conceding and Hillary before, and funny enough, she actually told Joe to not concede no matter what.
And then she calls for Trump to concede the race after sending her out a grand hand of Pedestal.
What a fucking deal.
So that's the story with Election Gate as of Thursday.
We'll be back to you Monday.
Of course, we'll do a live show if anything major happens.
But I think that Trump tweet really is the biggest deal.
This isn't a matter of Trump not getting a few votes.
This is a matter of Biden getting a lot of Trump votes.
Things are looking very good now.
We have a lot of evidence of election fraud.
And I love that not only is the left calling us bitches for not conceding, they're also also threatening us.
They're keeping a list.
We're keeping a list too, Chris Cuomo, of fuckheads like you who deny due process while talking about how important due process is.
You're not scaring us, but you're scaring us.
You're not keeping a list, but you're keeping a list.
You're not against democracy, but you're against democracy.
Stay tuned.
And on our website, censored.tv, we'll be keeping you up to date with Election Gate and where it's at.
All right, let's answer some letters.
You know, we get so much fucking mail.
And we started that column, Dear Censored, on the website.
And we still haven't taken a chip out of it.
This is from XVX.
Hello, Gayvon Martinez and Stevie Rye Vaughan.
What are your opinions on Tim Dylan?
Seems like he's one of the last dudes out here who will say wild, truthful shit and still has the ability to access guys like Joe Rogan.
Is he given a pass because of the gay mafia?
Despite his center and sometimes right-leaning beliefs?
Love to hear your opinion.
Tin Knockers Unite.
P.S. Be nicer to Ryan.
He's a good boy.
Don't think that Tim doesn't get shit.
Even back before I was the scariest guy in the world, Tim was getting shit for being on my show.
I tried to hire him as my co-host, by the way, back in the Gavin McInnes show days because I spotted his talent, which I think is why he likes me.
But Tim Dylan does get a lot of shit.
And I don't, it might be because he's gay, but I think he's just really open-minded.
And it's hard for the left to attack that when he's just so honest about everything.
All right.
But yeah, he does get a lot of shit, especially from the gays.
This is from Patrick, and it says, Gavin does not like white people, context included.
Uh-oh.
We don't want white people in our neighborhood because it changes the culture.
We don't like white people, basically.
Ouch.
Damning.
That looks pretty bad.
Hi, Fags.
Gavin did your joke about scoring fours just for fun to get stolen by American The Office.
I like your new.
Forget I like you more than a friend.
And they just list season nine, episode 18, 1813.
Like, I'm going to go hunting through episodes of The Office.
Yeah, let me just go to Hulu.
Yeah, no, don't bother, Ryan.
Gavin Gay Guy, a few one-minute clips that break down election oddity super clearly.
Definitely worth a watch.
This is from Austin.
P.S. Also, not sure if you noticed this, but this is from NotToB.
You said about a month ago that Babylon Be was going to have to shut its doors because the world was just too crazy for satire.
I guess the people from Babylon B agreed and they started a legitimate news site called NotToB.
Your mean dreams are becoming a reality.
Okay.
Tweet loading.
Let me take off my little blocker here.
Here we go.
You little bastard.
All right, well, you let that load on your own time.
We'll go to the next letter.
Hey, Lord G in Funk Era and Head Chancellor of the Lord.
Oh, sorry.
Hey, Lord G, Funk Era and Head Chancellor, Lord Supreme of the Fag Zone.
Watch this great cartoon of the idiot on CNN.
Oh, he does have those little glasses that aren't glasses with the little round pieces of glass.
I hate those kind of things.
This is vindication for a lot of people who have really suffered.
You know, I can't breathe.
You know, that wasn't just George Floyd.
That was a lot of people that felt that they couldn't breathe.
That was funny.
Steve, Van Jones divorce.
I just found out that this fucking retard got a divorce last year and has two young kids.
Hey, Van Jones, what's more traumatizing for your kids?
A Trump presidency or the fact that they only get to see daddy once every two weeks and he's not there to tuck them in at night?
Those crocodile deers should have been for his kids having to grow up without a father.
I got to say, I have a real problem with people who get divorced with young kids.
Like, I know of people who got divorced with a baby.
What's the matter?
You had a bad year?
She's nuts.
Well, why'd you fucking knock her up then, dumbass?
When they're older, it's less annoying, but you still fuck up your kids.
Even if your kids are 20 and you get divorced, what you've done is you've shown them that love is a lie.
And you fucked up.
Which is weird because a lot of my wife's liberal friends are dumping her because she supports me, which she doesn't support me politically, but she supports me as a husband and a dad.
So I guess what they want my wife to do is divorce me.
So now my three kids have no dad.
And that's better for society than being married to a Trump supporter.
How fucking deranged is that?
It's more of this anti-kid shit you see with the far left.
No, the normal left.
They don't give a shit about kids.
How many people do you hear liberals talking about divorce?
And they're always like, I get to be me.
And if I want to go have Thai food one night, I can go have Thai food.
And you're like, sounds great.
This divorce sounds great.
I wonder if anyone else has been affected.
Hmm.
Oh, yeah, your kids.
You just divided their parenthood in half.
Then the state could be their parents.
Yeah.
Because sometimes parents don't know what's best for their children.
All right, it's up.
Folks, I published an op-ed in the National Pulse about the statistical improbability of the Biden win.
Now, I want to be clear here that the statistical case is compelling, but it is not conclusive.
It is circumstantial.
What it does is points to the improbability of these results, and it demands that we thoroughly audit and investigate these results.
Now, I give four reasons.
I'm going to do four videos.
The first one is turnout.
Turnout was exceedingly high and in the places that Joe Biden needed it.
Again, that defies logic.
In Wisconsin, for example, statewide turnout was over 90%.
To put that in context, the country of Australia, voting is mandatory.
You get fined if you don't vote, and their turnout is only 92%.
Within Wisconsin, Milwaukee was critical.
Not surprisingly, that provided all, more than all, of the surplus for Biden in the state.
He won Milwaukee by 145,000 votes.
Turnout in Milwaukee was a stunning 84%.
It's pretty hard to believe if you put it in comparison with another Midwestern city, similar demographics, similar size, Cleveland.
Turnout was only 51%.
Are we really to believe that Milwaukee naturally had turnout that much higher than Cleveland?
It really strains credibility.
It demands further investigation.
More coming up.
You know, we don't usually watch long clips, especially at the end of the show with the mailbag, but this is very compelling and important.
Let's watch all three.
Let's go to part two.
Continuing on with the statistical case against Biden, the improbability that these results are valid, the second point of my op-ed is outperformance versus Obama.
It is really quite stunning how much Joe Biden outperformed Obama, but only in the places that mattered in Battleground States.
In other words, we did not see this on a national basis, this kind of outperformance that we saw in a place like Montgomery County, south of Philadelphia in Pennsylvania, a key, mostly swing county that leans slightly blue.
In 2012, Obama got 233,000 votes in Montgomery County.
But look at what happened this year for Biden.
He got 313,000 votes in Montgomery County.
He more than doubled Obama's margin of victory in Montgomery County.
And by the way, population growth does not account for this.
The county only added 22,000 total residents between 2012 and 2020.
Is it really possible that this lazy and doddering candidate, Joe Biden, was able to so massively outperform a politician with rock star appeal like Barack Obama?
No.
Again, it is a statistical anomaly that demands more investigation, more auditing of the results.
Third.
And population growth doesn't, they didn't really grow population-wise.
Okay, let's do part three.
I'm touching my balls right now.
That's good.
Only ballots, meaning people who voted for Joe Biden, but then did not vote down ticket.
You stop touching the balls?
It's touched.
Gotcha.
Even in places that had hotly contested races.
For example, Georgia.
But first, let's look nationally.
450,000 Biden-only tickets.
That is ballots.
That is very, very suspicious.
Let's look at the state of Georgia, the difference.
President versus Senate.
There are two Senate races going on in Georgia, so a lot of interest there.
Trump, this is the differential.
Trump versus the combined Republican Senate vote.
The differential was only 818 votes.
Absolutely minimal considering he got 2.4 million votes in total in Georgia.
In other words, almost everyone who voted for Trump also voted down ticket, voted for the senators.
Biden, though, a 95,000 vote down there.
That's what we talked about already.
96,000 people.
You can move on to the next one.
Okay.
All right, here.
Last one.
Folks, my fourth point of these statistical.
You know, this one's good because it's got the red banner under it.
Can you not have a sound guy?
Their sound is worse than ours.
The fucking popping?
This is Trump's number one election advisor.
He's a top expert in the entire country on elections, and their fucking audio sounds, it keeps popping.
Let's see if this is a little better because directly from the source.
Garrett up there.
He probably did and he didn't remember.
Folks, my fourth point of the statistical case against Biden, laying out by the numbers, the improbability of the results as we are told to accept him right now.
These results demand further investigation and audit because, in part, because of this improbability.
Let's consider my fourth point, which is the absence of actual vetting of mail-in vote.
In states like Pennsylvania, where the governor changed the rules by himself, unilaterally, unconstitutionally, and illegally deciding election procedures, knowing full well that there would be such a mass of mailed-in ballots that there would be no way that election officials could properly vet the legality and validity of these votes.
So what happened?
In Pennsylvania, the rejection rate of mailed-in ballots was only 0.03%.
Okay, now, that is 1 30th of the normal rate in the state of Pennsylvania.
And mind you, for first-time voters, for first-time voters, the typical failure rate is 3%.
So 100 times higher than the rejection rate in Pennsylvania.
New York, right next door, when they went to large-scale mail-in voting for their primary, they had a rejection rate of 21%.
That is 700 times, 700 times higher than what we saw in Pennsylvania.
The point here is that very, very likely, many, many millions of people are not valid.
Are not legitimate.
And invalid votes.
And invalid votes, yeah.
Believable.
And votes from invalids, yeah.
Like mine.
This is from Dan.
This is Muslims with a sense of humor.
Okay, I'll believe it when I see it.
I promise you this will not be funny.
Bitch, and then he fucking mirror her.
Oh, basically, they're calling you.
Wah, mirror her.
Wow.
One more time.
Yeah, let's give it another whirl.
Bitch, and then he fucking mirror her.
Oh, basically, they're calling you.
Wah, mirror her.
Whoa.
I don't feel good after that.
You know, we have to accept that other cultures aren't just different.
They don't have humor.
You know how many stand-up comics there are in China?
None.
They don't do comedy.
And in kung fu moves when they have comedy, it's like this bizarre slapstick where a guy falls downstairs and goes, oh, where they look at each other like this, like then they stop, and the one guy looks at each other.
He's like, that's funny.
That is funny.
Fuck Mary Kill.
Dana Lash.
Christy Noam, Republican governor of South Dakota.
She was the one who was shooting ducks.
She's pretty old.
And then she's out of order.
Alright, so this is the...
That's the governor right there.
That's Christy Noam.
This is Dana Lash.
You know who Dana Lash is.
And then Hope Hicks.
I'm going to kill Hope Hicks because I think she's unemployed now, and I feel like I'm doing the least damage to America.
And if you don't kill her, who's going to contribute?
She might kill you.
She has a weapon.
God, you're a fucking nerd.
So Hope Hicks is dead.
This is one of the easiest ones I've ever done.
Christy Noam is hot, but she's older, and she's going to be looking pretty bad in about 10 years.
But I want to fuck her now.
So I'll get my fucks in.
That's great.
And Dana Lash, I know her.
She's a wonderful person.
What are you doing?
That's Hope Hicks, you fucking inbred.
Who's that?
Who's that?
Yeah.
You don't know who that is?
One of those three broads that you mentioned.
You don't know who that is.
No.
What?
Dana Lash.
You're kidding me.
Have you ever heard of the NRA?
Yeah, I was thinking about joining, but I don't.
Do you know Dana Lash was the spokesperson for the NRA?
No.
How do you not know that?
Holy shit.
Imagine not knowing who Dana Lash is and working on a right-wing show.
Anyway, stop showing her she's dead.
I killed her.
She's fucked, and I'm going to marry her.
I feel bad, though, because she's got a great husband and wonderful children.
Oh, well, sorry, lady.
It's not my call.
Just be glad you're not dead.
Hey, dudes, Vice actually shared this video once upon a time back when jokes were legal.
Haven't heard you mention it, but Jacob Blake got his sexual assault charge dropped.
Yay!
Some buddies and I did this old video about 10 years ago, meant to bash Hollywood for Roman Polanski, etc.
But looks like now it's the media turning these guys into martyrs.
So hope you enjoy.
This looks like real shit quality.
How can you be in LA and make what's this called?
Wheelchair Rapist?
Yes.
It's pretty good.
Couldn't you get labs, though?
Are you in Hollywood?
What are you a fag?
Go get her.
She won't even talk to me.
No, I mean, go get her.
Who are you?
You want an interview or you want to become something?
If you can rape a midget, you can start something.
It's going to be a long night.
Okay, we get it.
That's pretty funny.
Good stuff, guys.
Work on your production skills, though.
Jordan, hey, Gavin and the underappreciated.
Yet still mentally handicapped, Brian.
I emailed you several times that you were wrong about Breonna Taylor, and after AIU's series explaining it all, I wanted to say, I'm sorry.
Oh, what have we here?
It's too late.
I already put you on a list.
I feel like I have a calling to help red pill my generation.
I'm 23.
Should I start on all the traditional platforms until I'm eventually banned?
Or do you have advice on a young Christian libertarian slowly converting to not left who wants to start a video series or a blog like Steven Crowder, but actually supports the Second Amendment?
Thank you, and I like you more than a friend.
Feel free to say my name only because no one in America can pronounce it anyway.
Jordan Tetreaux.
Sent from my iPhone.
I would recommend not doing a written blog.
No one will see it.
As far as sitting down at a table, I don't really see anyone watching you with no background at all.
And I'm sorry I gave up on this cool-looking 1910 prisoner thing.
I started to get claustrophobic.
So I think you should do streeters.
People don't often see 23-year-olds talking to 23-year-olds.
Be in your group.
Be at your college, wherever you're at, at your work, and talk to people about anything.
Man on the streets, no one can get enough of them.
Because if they're short and you keep the interviews like 10 seconds, fuck, I'll buy them off you.
And they can be about anything.
Men on the streets are awesome.
And there's always room for them.
It's like people get, you know, this whole litany of free actors.
I'm watching a movie now With 37 characters in it, but they're all being real and speaking the truth.
And that's often where you find some really hot shit.
For example, hot shit.
My favorite catch recently was that Streeter where the woman goes, I'm a kindergarten teacher.
I don't teach the curriculum, I teach them activism.
So when they ask me, when they see BLM or Antifa on TV, they know that they're about social justice.
Like kindergarten teachers, kindergarten students, watch fucking BLM.
I will build a great, great wall.
So we saw there that indoctrination begins in kindergarten.
And that was like an expose that was only five seconds and included a woman confessing her crimes.
Anyway, let's watch the final video and hope that the word final video comes in when the guy says final video.
Nice.
Isn't it hilarious that the Beastie Boys say that was all a prank?
It was a joke.
It was a joke.
We're pretending to be sexist.
We're feminists in a costume.
That's why we kicked out the fat ugly chick from our band as soon as we got a record deal.
Because we're feminists.
So let me just reprise this.
Proud boys, we need a graphic.
There's plenty of footage out there.
We need a song.
I think you could just do Proud of Your Boy.
We could just take the piano beginning from Proud of Your Boy.
So I wouldn't worry too much about the music for Proud Boys.
That's kind of cover.
Racism?
We don't have a song?
Nothing.
It's time to talk about racism.
Racism.
Racism?
There you go.
Yo, wake up America.
It's time to talk about feminism today.
There's your feminism song.
And oh, we are here.
Oh, get ready.
We're going to talk about the COVID.
How about an ancient Chinese secret one?
For like old videos?
Diddle ding ding ding ding ding.
Hello, we love you long time.
Today, we talk about chinkinpox.
Oh, as the left.
Oh, no.
All right.
Take two.
Diddle ding ding ding ding ding.
Hello.
We are here to talk about chinkinpox.
Or as some call it, the COVID.
Was that too Japanese?
I don't know.
I can't tell.
Okay.
I think it was fine.
And you don't have to use these.
You can make your own little songs.
And then Election Gate, we got the final video we got.
Okay.
So this is our final video.
I forgot what it is.
So we're all watching it together again for the first time.
And here.
And here it comes.
Hold on to your Hadarutskis.
Oh, my God.
Oh, it's our guy.
This is fantastic.
Kartnark.
Kartnark, what are you?
The funniest person in the world?
Like, he's traveling to different parking lots to tell people to put their carts back.
And he hasn't done this 30 times.
He's done this 3,300 times.
It must be his full-time job.
We've got to get him on the show.
Can someone find me Cartnark?
I need to speak to him.
Show me how many videos he has.
Is that Kartnark's channel?
It is.
He's in.
Let me see.
Click on videos.
Look at this.
How many are there?
So many.
Look at him.
Look at him.
He's amazing.
COVID did not slow him down.
Nope.
In fact, it looks like he picked up a little bit.
He's still enforcing the law.
So this one is called Nice Car.
You know where he is?
It rules.
Where?
Where Anthony Cumi used to hang out with his dad, San Juan Capistrano, in equestrian area of California.
I like horsey places.
Cart and Arcanteers.
That was...
See how violent that was?
It's egregious.
That's not where the car goes, sir.
That's split the spots.
Got a nice out of here.
Oops, it stops the magnets.
How do you go?
Yeah, exactly.
How do you kill it?
200 grand?
Plug it in his phone.
Didn't he see?
Maybe 20?
Yeah, nice shot.
Hard markets here, Agent Sebastian.
Yeah, let's go.
Do not touch my car, you fucking nigger.
Well, sir, do not touch my car, you fucking nigger.
He said it's funny to use it as an insult to white people, isn't it?
Yes, or I've never done that.
Although, some guy was yelling at me last week, and he called me nigger face.
Wow.
Because he was just so mad.
He's like, I don't fucking know what I had nothing to do with that nigger face.
Listen.
You have my attention.
Are you saying that I have big lips?
Yeah, that's good.
Well, sir, I'm out of the end mortar, number one, but that's our bumper magnet.
Oh, I got another one here for you.
Take my car again.
I'm going to call the police.
Sir, why do you call the police?
You're touching my vehicle.
The magnet's touching you.
You can't afford my car, so that's what fucked up.
How much does your car cost?
$20,000.
Why'd you pay this much for your car and you can't change your car?
This is like a good argument, sir.
That's just you calling the streets.
That's not nice, sir.
I'm going to give you a fucking cover first.
Get away from my car in our paws.
Rip the shit up and charge.
Whatever needs to come first.
Well, I don't think it's nice.
I think what needs to come first is you're taking the car back instead of slamming it into the spot.
Well, that's your business.
That's the problem with Americanized.
Motherfuckers don't mind your business.
That's what the issue is.
The problem with America is people don't take responsibility for their own actions.
No, this is my line for the cars.
Here we go, right there.
Does he have a GoPro on a helmet or something, you think?
It doesn't look like a GoPro.
How?
Where?
Does he have an iPhone taped to his chest?
Yeah, I don't know.
Because you can see he's using both hands.
Sure is.
Yeah, this doesn't look like GoPro footage to me.
Yeah, it's not fisheye enough.
No.
I mean, you can't make it linear, but the quality isn't as good.
Stay the fuck away!
Sir, why are you yelling?
Because you're fucking touching my shit!
Sir, can I put it under your windshield?
Does that make you feel better?
Stay the fuck away from my car!
That's assault, sir.
I've a constant curious.
That's still a bad.
Then you should know better then how to use your shit.
You should know that's not.
No, you put it on yourself.
That's not petty.
Sir, it's.
You give all us white people a full story.
That's petty.
That's the joke, moron.
You give all us white people a bad name.
All those white people a bad fucking name.
By being responsible?
Alright, guys.
Well, he threatened me with a gun, which, for the Cardark's safety, we are going to.
Let's California play YU something.
Well, we get in that video, anyway.
So the point is, folks, Cardin Archeteers, if he really did have a concealed carry permit.
Are we cardinaleers?
Yeah, I guess we are.
Which we have to treat that as a credible threat.
He should be able to do that.
He knows that is not the acceptable use.
That's not a life-threatening situation when someone's asking you to put your cart back.
So for folks who were looking to get a concealed carry permit, please be more responsible than that, fellow.
If indeed he really has one, a lot of people will just say that.
But again, once a lethal force is going to get our regulations.
You turn around.
You turn around.
That is a fantastic, petty, and annoying character that you invented, sir.
And thank you for bringing it to our attention.
Thank you for getting on people's nerves and being a dick about carts.
I kind of agree with you.
I always take my carts back.
All decent people should.
Sometimes I'll see shit like in the New York City subways.
I'll just see a big, like, super gulp cop just on the stairs of the subway.
I can't imagine me just going, I'm done with this.
I'm going to put it there.
Not in the garbage.
I'm just going to put it there.
What are you doing?
We're running out of time.
We have 30 seconds.
Get fired.
Get in trouble.
Be brave.
And never stop fighting.
When we meet, I get excited.
She gon' blow and she gon' ride it.
No relationship, feelin' fightin'.
Group like birds, I feel it fightin'.
Girl, I got prayers for you.
Got a couple bands for you.
I like this band for you.
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