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Jan. 15, 2020 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes
01:25:39
S02E112 - THE EYES HAVE IT [2020-01-15 - S02E112 - THE EYES HAVE IT]
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Time Text
Live from New York, it's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McGuinness Lee's eyes cry every night for you.
These eyes guess who that is?
Who?
The guess who.
I did guess who, but I don't know.
The guess who?
I can't.
You know, I can't.
Come on, guess who?
Yeah, I guessed already, and I don't know.
I can't extrapolate information where it doesn't exist.
The guess who?
The guess who?
Is this a game?
That's what we're doing.
The guess who.
Oh, no, yeah, I don't know how to play.
I can't.
The guess who?
I don't know.
It's the guess who.
Is the name of the group The Guess Who?
How have you not heard of The Fucking Guess Who?
I don't know.
I've heard.
We won't get fooled again.
That's The Who, Retard.
Oh.
You've never heard of The Guess Who?
Who Who?
What are you, an owl?
That was really funny.
That's from.
Al Pacino did that.
You never seen that?
But wait, I sent you the link.
Didn't you see on YouTube that it's the guess who?
Yeah, I was doing a bit.
Yeah.
Well, in the future, don't do a bit about you not knowing something.
Because it's quite believable.
It's totally believable.
Did you know that Randy Bachman was in the guess who?
Of course you knew Bertram Cummings.
From Turner Overdrive?
Yeah, from BTO.
Taking care of business, working overtime.
That's right.
That's my favorite part of that song.
Did he say workout?
No, working overtime.
That's right.
Oh, you think he says workout?
I think so, yeah.
Workout.
Let me see.
It's not as good.
Bachman Turner Overdrive.
Taking care of business.
They had some jams, that band.
I don't think anyone toured like BTO, Bachman Turner Overdrive.
They toured for like years and years at a time without stopping.
Taking care of business.
That's how much Vancouver sucks.
You're just happy to tour.
You know what happened to them on tour once?
What's up?
They got some KFC because they're fat fucking pigs.
And as they were biting into it, they bit into a rat.
Ew.
It was running along the pipes and it fell into one of the deep fryers.
Let's hear them.
BTO, Eden KFC.
Workout.
Workout.
What a week.
He does it different every time.
And it's funny because everyone in the audience is waiting for that.
It's like Styx Sail Away where he goes, that one time he goes, come sail away with me, lads.
Come sail away.
Oh, lads.
Yeah, and it's buried in the repetitions.
You don't really know what it's going to come.
Or with little Corvette when he goes, baby, you got to slow down.
And then the other guy.
You got to slow down.
Yeah.
And then lit the red to COVID.
Lit to red to COVID.
Yeah, those are little nuggets of treats that you wait for.
Little nuggets of treats.
I think just little nuggets or little treats is fine.
What is this little nugget of a treat?
Oh, it's not the whole treat?
In Quebec, in French-Canadian, we used to say étron, E-T-R-O-N.
You know what that means?
No.
A piece of a piece of shit.
So like a little piece that breaks off is an étron.
That's pretty good.
And then I made up the term visage d'étron.
And their swear words are all like the church related, tabarnac, the tabernacle, callis, the chalice.
Modit is really bad.
You can say shit and fuck to a kid.
That's weird.
But you don't say tabernacle to a kid.
Oh, my God.
Or an old lady.
But so when I come up with visage d'étron, which is a piece of shit face, they would just gasp.
Because no one's done that.
They're swear words before.
It was really fun.
It was like having a blank canvas.
Anyway, the reason that I chose that song, These Eyes, is someone recreated a meme using their bug eyes.
This is 1-1.
And we could have saved this to the end, but wait, can you play?
Well, first let's watch it.
And then play Taking Care of Business over it?
It's okay.
Calm down.
Oh, shit.
It's okay.
I'm sorry.
He apologized.
It's my fault.
He apologized.
And you know what?
That didn't upset me.
But the bitch asked.
Sorry.
That told me to calm down.
Wait, is that a remake?
Yes.
Retard?
That's terrifying.
You're a remake.
It looks like Mac and me.
Well, you can see the original.
I got it next.
It's right below that link.
But you all remember this one.
This is a running theme with the show, by the way.
Just stop.
What have we done to women?
We've turned them into these arrogant, bossy fucking bitches.
It's like we gave Yoko Ono the Beatles or something, or we gave some little girl the rights to all Hell's Angels shit.
Yeah, that's a better analogy.
Sorry, Yoko.
I love you.
And now we just have this babysitter leading a pack of dudes in the Hell's Angels, just like, you know what?
We're going to pull over right here.
I have to piss.
And if anyone has a problem with that, they can go fuck off and they're not Hell's Angels anymore.
Like, that's what we've turned women into.
Bossy bitches.
A generation or two ago, you wouldn't have some woman.
There'd just be like a woman that would go, my God, someone was rude to me in the car.
And then the sons and the brothers would go try to find her or something.
She wouldn't get into the window, start telling people to fuck off.
Or I've been watching all these videos of women getting kicked off planes.
And they're yelling and screaming.
I think we have one here.
yelling and screaming at the police, calling them bitches and faggots.
Yeah, I know it's my fault.
That's why I'm saying sorry.
She thinks it's cute that her driver almost hit my kids, and she thinks she's she looks like Shoe Nice and Amy Schumer.
Oh, Amy Shoe Nice.
She needs to take a video of it instead of apologizing like a sick.
You being a bitch is gonna help?
I've been saying, I don't know.
Calm down.
Calm down.
You should calm down.
You're delirious.
It's okay.
I'm sorry.
He apologized.
It's my fault.
He apologized.
Yeah, I know it's not.
And you know what?
That didn't upset me.
But the bitch-ass hoe.
Sorry.
Calm down.
Is she a nappy-headed hoe, too?
You're calling me.
Sorry, but you're calling me a bitch.
I'll set an example.
Sorry.
My kids can't hear me calling you a bitch.
Your window's open.
They can't hear me because they're listening to the kids.
I can't tell if she's doing a parody of the woman she's talking to or if that's her voice.
That woman has not performed Fallatio in many decades.
Anyway, now go back to 1-1 and show bug eyes, but play these eyes.
Oh, okay, gotcha.
Do you have the technology?
do.
Calm down.
Calm down.
It's okay, I'm sorry.
He apologizes.
It's my phone.
He apologized.
Please, I...
It's my phone.
Sorry.
That's what we got every night for you.
That's a talent I am jealous of.
What?
Being able to pull back your eyelids.
Like, that's obviously something she can do where she has to sort of like push them back.
What do you mean, oh?
I thought that was a prosthetic dude that looks crazy to me.
That's one of the most important things.
I mean, it could conceivably be a prosthetic, but I'm sure you've seen people bug out their eyes before.
Yeah.
There's that famous black guy on the fishing boat.
Why are you pulling up Mac and me?
Because that's exactly what she looks like.
It's terrifying.
Calm down.
That was Jennifer Anderson's first movie.
That was Jennifer Anderson playing Mac?
Nope.
She was one of the dancers in the McDonald's dance scene.
Damn.
I've never seen that movie.
Oh, you should check it out.
It's fucking out.
You know what it's about?
No.
Alien.
E.T. was big.
McDonald's decided they wanted to get into the movie business because it's just a big ad and you just have tons of scenes at McDonald's.
What?
So they made their own E.T. called Mac and Me.
That's insane.
And McDonald's was just crowbarred into everything and it would just burst into a musical.
It's kind of known as the worst film of all time.
That's amazing.
I remember we had the VHS?
I'd never watched it.
My grandmother bought it.
It's just a shitty ET.
Total ripoff.
Come on, let's get them.
This is McDonald's.
By the way, if someone from outer space shows, I don't care how small they are, shoot them.
Yeah, they could have powers.
They got here.
They're pretty powerful.
And if you've seen what we do to lesser species like cows, we put them in cheeseburgers.
I don't want to be in any fucking human cheeseburgers.
Shoot to kill.
Shoot to kill.
Kill the boy.
Shoot to kill.
I really wish that wasn't so catchy because it's terrible.
All things are bad or catchy.
Eat the poo-poo while you gay.
Mac and me.
Notice fences in movies always suck?
Yes, they're easily thwarted.
Like that guy just blew through a fence on his wheelchair, and then in the Christmas story, every fence looks like it's made of driftwood.
It's not like we didn't have wood back then.
Just build a fucking fence.
We've been building them for a long time.
But everything was someone's just pushing through the fence to get to the other side.
Yeah, shoot that down.
It's like I was saying, did I do this with the dictator?
I don't like people rescuing sharks.
Yeah.
Did I mention that one?
He did, yes.
He did.
Oh, get some water on it.
Get some water on it.
Help those fangs get back in the water.
Yeah.
By the way, speaking of movie rip-offs, so I told everyone I love Force Mager, which is a Swedish film about masculinity, especially Prescient in Sweden, where there's a war on masculinity.
This isn't in the notes.
And it's a beautifully done film because the guy seems like an awesome guy.
Seems like your dad.
He's a good dude.
Until there's an avalanche and he grabs his gloves and his phone instead of protecting the kids.
And she's mortified by that.
She has trouble getting over it.
And the way they deal with it at the end is so Band-Aid's solution that you realize that Swedish men have no future.
Masculinity has no future.
Now, I've been since talking to some Swedes about this film.
And apparently the guy who made it works with the government, pro-immigration guy, open borders dude.
His wife's this big feminist activist, egalitarian, in quotation marks.
So it's kind of cool that a movie about men losing their masculinity came from that.
I guess it's conceivable it was an attack on men, but they didn't do a very good job because us normal men saw the man in that film and was just like, you fucking piece of shit, stop crying.
Anyway, new news.
Do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do.
Julia Louise Dreyfus.
Her previous project was a documentary about her dad who bought drawings by black retards because they used to be slaves and pretended they were good.
And if you recall, it was just like a circle with the head and some four sticks and that was a horse.
He didn't even know that horses front legs.
He doesn't know which way they bend.
Or any animal.
So he'd make them all sticks.
He played it straight.
He played it safe.
Yeah, I'm just, it's just, these are the front legs of all animals, just in case.
Why don't you look at a picture of a fucking animal, dude?
You fucking animal.
Dude.
Yeah, you fucking animal dude.
William Louise Bill Trailers, the artist.
Bill Trailer, yeah.
I like how she honors him.
He was such a good art collector.
You mean rich guy who just shopped?
Wow, what a great collector you are.
Am I a great record collector?
What a gift it is to shop for yourself and go, now, and by the way, he obviously sucked.
He thought these were good.
Yeah.
Yeah, but the guy was a slave.
Oh, okay, that means the art is good then.
The guy had a rough life.
Definitely picture like art snobs going over this and being like, see, the dog, I think, represents the captivity.
Imagine that was a racist white guy who made those.
You'd be in a bonfire right now.
Yes.
Their version of art is it's all about the story behind it.
No, I'm not buying it.
So anyway, she is doing force majeure frame by frame, exactly the same movie, exactly the same scenes in exactly the same order with exactly the same characters.
But Will Farrell is the guy that's lacking masculinity, and he's his usual Will Farrell, stupid cuck, loser self.
So now it's like an attack on men and what losers we all are.
So she's ruined it.
She ruined the whole point by making it too slapstick.
And now you go, well, now the movie is just called Men Suck.
Whereas the original Force Majeur, the real moral of it was, we're losing some men.
And this is the state of men today.
And you should be wary as a man that you may fall into this.
As opposed to Bozo the clown, Will Farrell.
This is seems like a really interesting concept, though.
What?
Making stealing a movie?
Yeah.
Well, they do it all the time, right?
All American TV was stolen.
Sanford and Sun was Steptoe and Son.
Three's Company was from Three's the Crowd.
Turn it up.
Who wants us to keep doing pulls up?
I don't know.
Just been through a lot lately.
My dad passed away.
Eight months ago.
So we came here.
He's still here.
You lose a parent, and the ticking gets louder.
Every day is all we have.
We have.
Yep.
Powerful.
Maybe we should.
But he's just a douche.
I don't think it'll be that challenging.
It'll be fine.
Is that okay?
It's fine.
Same scene.
Wow.
But hold on.
In the guys.
Wait a minute.
Go back.
Did you not assume?
Go back, go back.
Did they say from the co-creators of The Descendants?
Isn't it from the people who made this exact fucking movie?
Like, The Descendants guys?
No, no, no.
You don't get any credit.
You just recreated a movie frame by frame.
Wow.
That's the exact same scene that's in Force Majeure.
So it's not like it's an homage.
I like that movie, The Descendants, too.
What was that one again?
George Clooney.
And they're in Hawaii.
Wait, shut up, turn it up.
And I look over at Pete, and he had grabbed his phone.
Pete left us.
Dude, they're making it funny.
It's not funny.
It's about a marriage falling apart.
That exact scene is in force measure.
I ran to get help.
Yes.
I'm gonna win.
This song would happen.
I choose to survive.
I love my family.
Every day is all we have.
How could I run away?
Ski boots.
What?
Can you run in ski boots?
Not very well.
Boom.
Exactly.
Did that happen?
Yes.
Exactly.
See my scene, except it wasn't boom.
Right.
He goes, it's all subtitles, but he's, she's like, I don't think I, I don't remember it that way.
I was running.
I don't think I was running.
I mean, you're running in ski boots?
And she goes, you can run in ski boots.
You can hear it on the phone.
But it's not like whap, whap.
Anyway.
To his credit, though, wouldn't he think that they're going to be running behind him?
Would he supposed to grab them?
Yeah.
Okay.
What you're supposed to do if you see an avalanche coming at your family is get them under a table or tip up the table and have it face the snow or something.
Yeah, yeah.
In the good movie, she goes to pick up the kids to run with them, and she's not strong enough because she's a woman.
And he's got his mitts and his phone.
And again, the most important thing about this movie for me personally was I have a crippling fear of cowardice.
You don't know how brave you are until you're there.
Now, I've been brave in the past, but in a situation like that, if I were to grab my phone and run and leave my family there, I don't see how I could possibly forgive myself.
So it might be the end of my life.
I would have to just get avalanche.
I'm one phone grab away from suicide.
Because of course, you're like me.
You're all positive that you would stand up and do the right thing.
But you don't know till there's an avalanche coming at your family.
I'd be gone by right there.
I know.
You don't have a family, fucknuts.
No, I know, but that's it.
Right, but you've got three kids.
I mean, two kids and a wife.
Yeah.
Anyway.
Also in the news, very important story.
One, two.
Look at the size of this fucking fish.
What the fuck?
Whoa.
It's 350 pounds.
What's your fishing line?
A steel cable?
How do you get it in the boat?
I don't understand.
What does the tech say there?
You can get like thousand pounds.
According to the Florida Fisherman Life Conservation Commission, this is a big old fish.
Thanks, guys.
Thanks for your input.
In late December, fishermen caught a massive Warsaw grouper near southwest Florida.
Now biologists from blah, blah, blah, the Research Institute fish.
I don't want to hear about that.
I want to know how you do it.
Because if you're fishing with a cable strong enough to catch that, then you're expecting something in the hundreds of pounds.
How could you possibly be expecting that?
They go out big fish or big fish fishing.
Yeah, deep sea fishing marlins.
Big fish and marlins and stuff.
They're not 350 pounds.
They can be 210 pounds.
Really?
Average, yeah.
Or I guess those big tuna guys?
I don't know if tunas get that big.
Look it up.
Let me see.
How do you get it onto the boat?
You have four dudes grab his mouth?
Is that edible?
The grouper?
Yeah.
I think you could eat grouper.
I could find that out too, but these are some big boys.
Let's see how much.
Some big tunas.
The average size, but 235 pounds?
Anywhere from 130 to 235 pounds.
So it's not that...
You know that show, River Monsters?
I love that show.
I fucking hate that show, and I hate you for loving it.
What?
Because that guy is a bourgeois cunt.
Yeah, well, yes.
And he thinks he's so intense.
He's totally fucking humorless.
Ugh, I hate him.
He likes showing his feet a lot.
Yeah, he loves his little toes.
But he's always freaking you out.
I wasn't sure if I was going to...
Whoa, I've got a sawfish.
Finally, I'm hands-on with the sawfish, the aquatic alien that wields what's possibly the weirdest weapon of them all.
Yeah, we've seen swordfish, dude.
Ooh.
What a loser, by the way.
Look at my teeth.
I want an apple, chomp, and now you don't see my teeth.
I don't need them right now.
How about having fucking teeth sticking out of the side of your head?
Like a dork.
And what you know what they do with that?
They have to like spear the fish.
Okay, I got it.
It's dead.
Now I have to sort of get it off my teeth and then try to eat it with my other fucking four mouths.
Loser.
We should do Animal Planet.
I really think so.
Because you should see this koala go through it without an accent.
I mean, without.
I'll do the British guy.
Koala gets evicted from tree.
You ever see this?
No.
It's amazing.
We're having a very half-assed show today, aren't we?
Koalas will rip you to fucking shreds.
*crickets*
Sorry, there's no koala Superman.
It screams like a little lady.
Do you hear the other one growling?
Like, what's happening right now?
They're dicks.
They're dicks.
No, it's true.
Koalas are assholes.
Have you ever heard of this prank they like to do in Australia?
They say that there's a different type of koala called a dropping bear or something.
Just look up Koala Australia prank.
And what they do is they tell these American journalists who come by that you have to be really careful of these other kind of koalas that look exactly like koalas, but will rip you to shreds.
And what they do is they dress up the journalist in protective gear with huge protective things and goggles and helmets and stuff.
I think that's it.
Is that it?
Yeah, that's it.
Check it out.
This makes me love Australians.
I'm not quite sure what it's doing right now.
It's looking at well, okay.
This ITV presenter has been led to believe she's holding dot dot dot.
Right.
Deadly drop bear, which senses her fear.
Don't take it off.
I'm gonna get the dot after time.
Dot.
No, okay.
Notice I have an extra.
Turn it off.
Okay, okay.
She's scotted.
Take it off.
Take it off.
Take it off me.
Okay.
Alright, alright.
Good boy.
Alright.
Goodbye.
Sam?
That's fine.
That's great.
You're kidding me!
You're kidding me!
A drop bear.
A drop bear.
By the way, speaking of Australia, so you know that gay who killed himself?
Bullied to death?
Yes.
He said drag queens aren't for kids.
I get this letter from this guy who says he worked with him.
Okay?
You're not going to believe this.
I think his name's Winston.
Right?
I know I'm reading the mailbag early, but this is sort of different.
Kind of losing you on the mic a little bit there.
Yeah.
Winston A. Cumberbund.
So he says, Dear Gavin, I'm writing to you blokes to highlight the tragic story of Wilson Gavin, the young gay conservative who protested Drag Queen's Story Hour.
Wilson was a mate of mine.
We worked together on a number of conservative causes and projects for the past couple years.
He's kind of like a Milo Light, a devout Catholic, and far less flamboyant than Milo.
Well, that might change after a few drinks.
Gavin, you have received the same or worse in your time.
You know what it's like.
Unfortunately, I don't think Wilson could cope with all the pressure.
He was only 21.
You do have to have pretty thick skin.
I mean, marriages fall apart.
People commit suicide.
It's like a constant state of grabbing your phone and glass mitts.
The avalanche of the left.
No, but like when you get death threats on a regular basis, you have to assume they're all true.
So it chips away at your psyche.
Sitting in the back of the restaurant.
Every time I go to a restaurant, I have to sit in the back.
All right, it's shit going down.
Have a plan with the kids.
Don't stop believing starts playing.
You're like, oh, shit.
We're going to cut the black.
Damn it.
So anyway, he's telling me to talk about this guy, right?
And he's also got some great points.
Like he says there was this dude, Lord Drake.
You should have this in your email.
Yeah, you were CC'd.
Lord Drake?
Yeah, Lord Drake.
Homophobia's taking another life.
This time, internalized hatred, driven by years of LNP endorsed actions.
Liberal means conservative in Australia.
National Club President Wilson Gavin dies by suicide.
So he killed himself according to this queen because he had internalized homophobia.
That, by the way, I've heard that about proud boys who are gay.
They have internalized homophobia.
What the fuck are you talking about?
They say it about black people, too, if they're conservative.
They have internalized racism.
You got little Klan men living in your fucking pectoral muscles.
Anyway, so this guy contacts me and I go, dude, you're telling me to talk about Gavin, about Wilson Gavin, about a day after I talked all about him.
So you might want to check out the show that you're emailing and telling it what to say.
And then I go, let's get you on the show.
And he goes, I'd love to, but confident, and I'm blowing his confidentiality.
I'm a political staffer.
This could be legal problems for me and the logo, blah, blah, blah.
I can't get involved.
It's too dangerous, blah, blah, blah.
And I have to keep a low profile.
And I go, I go, I've already been talking about it.
Do you not watch my show?
And I go, so you refuse to come on.
You're too scared.
Your friend was killed by the mob and you're too scared to stand up.
And then he goes, some of us fight overtly, like yourself.
Some covertly.
It's better to be inside the tent and make changes within than be on the outside.
Look at this fucking little kid is telling me about life.
I'm 50 years old.
I'm half a century old.
Seems like there's validity to that, though, right?
No.
To be covert.
Be brave.
Do you watch this fucking show?
Yeah.
Get fired.
Get in trouble.
We have our spies.
We got people on the inside.
Yeah, they're pussies.
So, anyway.
Do you like my sweatshirt, by the way?
Do you know who made it?
No, Tommy Hilfiger.
Wow, you really are at 100% shithead rate.
Is that like a Henley?
Something Henley?
No, Todd Snyder was the designer for J. Crew, but he insisted on too much quality and it got too expensive for them.
It killed their profit margin.
So after, I don't know, decades, they fired him.
He did really cool stuff like the liquor store.
You ever go to the liquor store in Lower Manhattan?
I shouldn't have told you about it because you're going to go blow all your fucking money there because you're so bad at saving.
But it's a really cool store that has high-end, what is it, J. Crew stuff?
I forget the brand.
But anyway, so he does these one-offs with certain brands.
And right now, Todd Snyder is doing Champion.
He's got great stuff.
I like that.
Yeah, well, it's out of your league, so keep your eyes off it.
But the Champion sweatshirts are like recreations of the 70s ones.
So I'm wearing a J. Crew shirt underneath my Todd Snyder.
And I like to have just a little splash.
Yeah, that's fun.
A little splash of plaid there, you know?
It's very 1950s American preppy, which is really what the mods were based on.
They were all the Harringtons and all that shit you see and the short haircuts.
They were being 50s mods.
They were inspired by Steve McQueen.
Show some of the champion stuff, though.
Are you on the Todd Snyder's page?
Yeah.
Todd Snyder, New York.
Champion.
They have their own little tab now.
Champion.
Well, maybe you should click on it.
What are you doing?
Waiting.
Well, not nuts about those.
Nor those.
This is all champion?
Well, it's all gay.
Yeah, that's pretty quiet.
That's pretty cool.
Italian wool?
Yeah, I can kind of get with that.
It wouldn't be quiet if someone stepped to me in that.
Nah, he would like to get it.
That would be quiet.
It would be quiet if the guy did the red and the blue if he stepped to me.
But hey, if someone steps to me with that, they're going to get some.
They're going to get it.
These are cool.
Hi, I'm the most popular supermodel in the entire fucking world.
And if you come up to me with a certain pair of shoes that are only about $180, I'll start sucking your dick.
They're about $180.
These are pretty affordable for high-end stuff.
$118 for sweatpants?
No, it's out of your league, dude.
Stop.
I almost bought a $250 hoodie.
You're kidding me.
No, I didn't.
I wouldn't have ever, ever.
Even if I have a million dollars, I wouldn't buy $250.
You can buy expensive shit if you can afford it.
Here's how you buy things.
Is this a good deal?
Yes.
Can I afford it?
It's number two.
Okay, that was no.
Do I need it?
Mm-hmm.
Is number three.
Yes.
You don't need it.
For my briefcase.
For my briefcase.
You didn't need a briefcase?
What was the matter with your backpack?
Thing is.
90% of New Yorkers carry their laptops around their backpack.
Now, the way my express suits are constructed, I meant I wanted them to last a long time.
I'll put the camera on me.
And it destroys the shoulder pads.
I learned this from going through the airport with my backpack on.
And then I looked it up.
I was like, am I not supposed to?
And it says, yeah, you don't do that.
It's going to ruin the padding in there.
And then you can't, unless you bring it to a tailor and they crack the shit open, they can't reset that cotton in there.
It's packed very particularly.
And I'm not going to get an express suit fixed up.
It's ridiculous.
You know how many years it would take for a knapsack to ruin your suit?
In one thing, the shoulder pad shifted.
It now has a bump in it.
I could show you.
My gray suit is fucking ruined.
Basically, so it also takes away from the aesthetic when you wear a backpack with a suit.
And I want to look like a businessman.
I got my nice shoes.
I want to be a businessman.
You know that's a quote from Gary Coleman on Arsenio Hall.
Where he goes, I want to be a businessman.
It's almost as good as...
What do you mean a businessman?
Yeah, that's an investment.
Investment in your own retardation.
Can we?
I've been meaning to get to this, speaking of you being a fuck up.
Is there a way we can access your Instagram stories?
I'm a boomer.
My stories, I don't know.
Do they go away?
Yeah, they do.
After 24 hours.
Yeah, no, I don't see that.
No, I can't.
Maybe my archive?
Well, let us see what you're looking at.
Because your Instagram stories are so shit.
What?
I'm constantly amazed.
I assume an Instagram story is like, hey, everyone, check it out.
I just caught this frog.
I've never seen markings like this before because it's something that you don't want to fit in an Instagram thing.
Anyway, bye, frog.
And then he goes away.
I get that.
You'll just have you with a tie and some shitty song in the background by like Tool or something.
And I'll just be like, That's it.
Yeah, they're little vignettes of expression.
But you're not expressing anything.
Will you stop horking tobacco into a fucking Gatorade container?
It's so disgusting.
You're making me seem like the worst.
You are the worst.
Show the camera what you're just spitting into.
He's.
I apologize.
That is disgusting.
It doesn't help that I look the most disheveled I've ever looked.
You're worse than menstruation.
Menstruation is a curse that leads to a miracle.
But you just said, I'll take on my own menstruation, thanks, without the creating life part.
I need nicotine.
Otherwise, I can't concentrate.
So this is for the show.
This is an investment again.
I don't want this in my lip.
It's very in.
It's not convenient for me.
But I do it for the show.
Bieber has limes, one, three.
Will you stop with the fucking spinning?
You just did it two seconds ago.
One more.
How often do you have to do it?
I just don't want to swallow this particular batch.
It's like it's every 10 seconds.
This one's bad.
Okay.
Are you done with your disgusting fucking habit?
Screwing on the top, putting it away.
Justin Bieber reveals Lyme disease.
Have you noticed Lyme only happens to losers?
He is.
Kathleen Hanna, Justin Bieber, Ryan Katsu-Ribera.
Avra Levine.
Avra Levine.
Another shit stain on humanity.
She's great.
Why do you have to make things so complicated?
Justin Bieber announced some big news over Christmas that has fans excited.
This is a newspaper.
He has Lyme music and has now confirmed that not only is new music on the way, but so is an entire album of 45 City Stadium tour.
Listen to the other guy grew excited.
Just like Bieber's announcement in this trailer he released.
As humans, we are imperfect.
My past, my Jesus's house.
Nice pants.
Todd Snyder Smurf Collection.
I'm a homeless skater from 1993.
Oh, what's up?
Oh, look at how he walks.
Just whatever, man.
Lackadaisical.
That's amazing.
Trying to get through my day.
Where's Lyme?
Yummy.
Yummy.
You know what's not yummy?
Lyme disease.
Debilitating.
You know what's amazing about you spending money?
So you buy a $200 handbag.
If you went to the clinic downstairs and spent another $100, you could get retested and find out if you have a debilitating disease.
Right.
But you know what I am taking?
Diatomaceous Earth, which is known to Iraq.
Known by who?
Marianne Williamson?
No, hey.
Here, look, we'll look it up.
Diatomaceous Earth.
It's some hippie bullshit thing.
You've got a doctor right there who gave you antibiotics.
You're supposed to follow up.
How do you not even know that?
You go to a doctor's office, they check you, you take the antibiotics, then you go back.
Did this work?
So what is this?
Some stupid fucking health site?
There's probably more.
Holy shit.
You probably believe in those wax candles that they put in your ear to get rid of earwax, and the earwax is just from the candle itself.
That one I do not fall for.
So Bieber has limes, huh?
Lime?
Yeah, lime.
It has to be an all-catalyzer.
I have faults for you to connect.
I have multiple.
Oh.
He's just got one.
And yeah, it leads to all kinds of neurological problems, too.
I heard, yeah.
So you may want to check up on that and make sure that you don't still have it.
Somebody said that.
I'm not going to hold your hand every step of the way.
No, I get it.
No, you did quite enough.
Yeah, there's a lot of things I got to do, frankly.
I got to pay my taxes, frankly.
It's been three years.
I paid my taxes.
Have you ever paid taxes?
Yes.
Stop doing Instagram moments, please.
All right, so here's the main story of the day.
Oh, I just sent you an email after everything at the very last second from Yashar Ali, one of the worst people in the world.
He's a homo from Iran who can't wait to throw his parents under the bus and talk about how horrible they are and how Iran treats gays.
But at the same time, he's an immigrant.
So he talks about how racist America is and how Iranians are mistreated and basically just constantly complaining and whining about his lot in life, where we took him in from one of the shittiest countries in the world.
Like, check out 19, Charlie Kirk.
The Groipers left to shit on him.
I don't like all this dissent within the right.
We need unity.
And I was watching this the other day and I just thought, Charlie Kirk is a national treasure.
And when you shit on him because you disagree on one stupid thing, you deny us a really effective activist who is going to college campuses and telling these imbeciles how far off they are.
but it seems do you agree Iran's an evil?
I think that Saudi, I think well my player, the Is Iran and Saudi Arabia both enemies of the West?
No, I don't think that's a good idea.
Wow.
So Iran funding Hamas and Hezbollah is what?
What would you say that?
Good?
I think that's the only thing the Palestinian people and the Lebanese people have the right to defend themselves from this.
Hamas is not defending themselves.
They're a terrorist organization targeting Jews, launching rockets into this nation-state of Israel every single day.
Hamas is not Palestinian.
Hamas and Hezbollah are terrorist organizations that were still on Twitter, by the way.
Total destruction of the rightful nation-state of Israel.
That's completely untrue.
Hamas.
Hamas.
Hamas has repeatedly expressed acceptance of the two-state solution.
Okay, well, the terrorism that Hamas and Hezbollah are responsible for pales in comparison with the terrorism that Israel and the United States carry out on a regular basis.
Two quick things.
First of all, Ayatollah Khamenei, the head of Iranian theocratic construction, essentially part of government, and the former president Akadi Majad, said death to Israel, death to the West, death to America multiple times.
How do they act on it?
Because you said it's just words.
They give billions to Hamas.
They give billions to Hezbollah.
They support the bombing of Israeli children.
They give money to PA that funds and incentivizes terrorist behavior.
They refuse to condemn Hamas and Hezbollah any time under UN resolutions ever.
They refuse to ever vote and say this is wrong.
They actually fund BDS resolutions all across the world.
That's the boycott Israel.
That's outwardly anti-Semitic, not to mention outwardly anti-gay, anti-Christian, anti-Western.
And finally, why does Iran want nuclear weapons so bad?
Why?
Because they want to act on their words to destroy Israel, destroy the West, destroy America.
Iran is the fundamentally biggest and most sinister evil of everybody in this room.
And if you have sympathy for it, I wonder why.
Don't you hate Muslims with British accents?
That just bothers me.
You went to some Hoity-Toity British school because we allowed your Iranian parents to come here and be rich.
And you take our British education and talk about how evil the West is with your wonderful rich, smart British learning.
Hello, I would just like to start this with saying that I feel absolutely no gratitude to Britain for taking me in and educating me and sending me to the finest schools.
In fact, I think they're terrorists.
And I think that what the Palestinians in Hamas are doing pales in comparison with, oh, the evil imperialist scum.
That's Ilhan Omar, too, talking about Somalia.
Oh, I have PTSD from when America invaded us.
America invaded Mogadishu to help the people get the aid they were sending because a warlord was keeping it for himself.
And by the way, we took in thousands of refugees, including you, you ugly bitch.
I wonder what's under that skull cap, that d-rag.
Just like pubes.
Ew.
My pubes.
You see that meme where like they photoshop?
That's really graphic.
Oh, photoshopping is evil, by the way.
Say what?
I'm going to get to that in censorship.
Do you think Charlie Kirk's like the America First Kids, the Grapers, they're like sharpening his blade a little bit?
Yeah, maybe.
Because did he usually have that passion?
I realized just till now.
You don't watch Charlie Kirk, Ryan.
You can't monitor his progress.
I was just going to say, I've never heard of Charlie.
So they don't interject.
But I'm asking you.
Yes.
No, he was always sharp.
But here's the criticism 2-0.
This was an interesting sort of a tweet thread that I was talking about actually with John's black wife, John Kinsman, Zenoa Kinsman.
TPUSA people really do have a type, though.
And we see Candace Owens with her white husband.
And then I think the black guy we just saw, I think that's him there with his white husband.
It's a different guy.
Are you sure?
Yeah.
Okay.
How do you know?
Because on Milo's show, we delved into that guy.
Okay.
All right.
Keep going down.
And there's something really interesting among black people who talk big about how their blackness matters to them and then marrying white people.
Now, at first glance, that seems like a great point.
And then, oh, keep going.
She talks about AOC, who says that AOC talks about how white supremacy is everywhere, but not just with her boyfriend, who is the whitest person I've ever seen in my life.
Ilhan Omar thinks white supremacy from Protest the Year.
He looks like Sean King's brother.
Wow.
Who also looks exactly like me.
Ilhan Omar thinks white supremacy and sexism.
I can't read it when you jump around like a fucking frog or a toad.
And sexism and racism cause violence, but reportedly broke up the marriage of a white man.
That guy's white as hell.
He is a fucking very white dude.
No, I'm Jewish.
Yeah, you're white.
I remember seeing this.
We should have talked about this with Ron, but during the riots in F letter F riots.
Anyway, where they were stabbing the fire hoses and everything.
They started to smash a bank.
And there was this Jewish guy there, older Jewish guy, who was part of the rioting because he hates racist cops too.
And he goes, I don't think we should start destroying property.
I think that makes our movement look bad.
And they're like, fuck you, white asshole.
And they shove him.
And he goes, no, no, I'm Jewish.
And like, they're going to go, oh, I'm sorry.
I had no idea.
Yeah, welcome to the revolution.
Come on in, my fellow Marxist comrade.
No, they just go, what?
I don't even, I hate Jews more.
And then just pound the crap out of them.
By the way, tomorrow, on tomorrow's show, we have a very involved how-to box instructional video where I show you every punch you need to know and how to do it.
That'll be on tomorrow's show.
We're just sort of fine-tuning it.
But anyway, go back to that meme because it sounds like she has a salient point.
And she would if we weren't living in a country that is some say 64% white.
I say if you include white Hispanics, it's more like 75.
It's sort of like with Christianity, the number seems to range from 64 to 75.
I wonder if there's a reason for that.
But let's say 70% white.
If you're in a country that's 70% white and you throw a rock, the odds are you're going to hit a white person.
So, Candace Owens grew up, I think, in Connecticut.
A lot of white people around.
She had a white people, how do races shit this year?
So, it's not like there were all these potential black lovers that she said, ew, gross, no thanks, and then chose a white one.
It's like if you talk about how great the West is, right?
And you live in Japan and you end up marrying a Japanese chick.
Well, there's tons of Japanese chicks around.
So it's not as hypocritical as it first appears.
And I think you can still think your people are awesome if you marry one that's different.
I think my people are awesome.
married one that's different.
Are we done with that?
Black people with spouses meme, or did it keep going?
No, go back.
As far as pictures, no, but there's some text here.
What did she say?
It's very weird that people of color who loudly espouse their own in-group racial preferences end up having revealed preferences for white people all along while hating white people for having those same stated in-group preferences.
That's a good point.
Go a little lower.
Love your people or not, but don't talk about how much you love your people and then not even make the most important decision of your life with the future of your people in mind while calling everyone racist for caring about theirs.
Oh yeah, that reminds me.
So some black people got on her case.
I think she seems like a black woman.
She seems like a woke black woman that Ashley raided Greipernberg.
And people said, no, man, this is actually the black people spreading their blackness around.
And it's based on that stupid one-drop rule, which the Nazis thought was a little too harsh, literally, where if you have like one fucking great-great-grandfather that was black, you're black.
And that was the Jim Crow evil racist America background rule that's long since dead and not worth talking about.
But it seems to come back up to discussions about race where they seem to think it's true that if your great-great-grandmother was black, then you're going to be black.
All blacks have to do to make whites black forever is one drop.
Ashley Ray is not.
She's a white woman.
That's just patently false.
Oh, that's her?
That's not her, Ryan.
It's Ashley Ray Goldenberg.
Yeah, holy shit.
You're so fucking dumb.
But I also got that from...
Ashley Ray Groupenberg.
She's verified.
She's verified.
So that is her.
And then she was talking about how somebody...
Ryan, the Groipenberg is a far-right troll, right?
Ashley, the girl you just saw, is a fucking stupid airhead feminist liberal.
Why verify?
Why would she spell her name different and include Groiper in it?
Why would a feminist lesbian do that?
See, this is, again, you knowing nothing.
You should be familiar with that other chick, and remember when she was on Tucker, and remember when she was all over the news, and what's his name?
Martin Shkrelli was stalking her and putting her in photos, which is why he's banned from Twitter.
I see, I see.
If you don't know anything, don't get involved.
I can't believe you just did that.
But can you be anonymous and verified?
I guess so, because they are...
No, of course you can't.
All right.
I think I'm finally ready to get to the story that I wanted to start the whole show with, which was censorship.
So there is this chick named Nanoodles.
She works for Sleeping Giants.
Sleeping Giants is a group that says, this is finally the segment.
We're starting the show right now.
Censorship on censored.tv.
Sleeping Giants are a group that say we are out to stop Nazis and white nationalists from making money.
I don't quite get why that's such a priority.
Are they going to be raising money to buy weapons for the imminent race war?
For the Boogaloo?
Is that what you're trying to prevent?
Too many weapons in a war?
I don't think they think it through that far.
And also, if you're out there to stop white nationalism, I assume a third of your posts are about the Aryan nations and other white supremacist groups?
No.
So they're lying.
What they're really about is thwarting conservatives.
And they have focused almost all their efforts on shutting down Breitbart.
And the way they do that is by harassing anyone who advertises with Breitbart, including people that are on dumb internet loops where they send it out to 10 million websites and you pay a fraction of a cent for each one, that kind of thing.
And that's under the auspices that when you're on their site, you're condoning their content, which is crazy.
If there's something on the news on CNN, like there was a mudslide and 10 babies were killed, and then there's an ad for Coca-Cola, does anyone go, that's fucked up?
Coca-Cola is linked to dead babies now.
That's not how people operate with ads.
They don't link them.
Anyway, what sleeping giants really are about is terrorism.
They are about political terrorism.
Well, terrorism is political by nature.
They terrorize people.
They try to bankrupt them based on their political views.
And they're not fighting Nazis.
They're fighting conservatives.
Or actually, they're fighting non-liberals.
So the most recent story, 1-4, is this hideous cunt got Stefan Molinya booted off of MailChimp.
Confirmed, MailChimp has terminated Stefan Molinya's account.
Yes!
He can't speak to people who want to listen to him.
Thanks to everyone who pitched in on this one.
And there's MailChimp saying, thank you for bringing this to our attention.
We've terminated this account.
They terminated my account too, by the way.
Within like a week.
You think she's ugly, huh?
Because her forehead's the largest I've ever seen?
Is that why?
Her forehead never ends.
Eventually, the picture had to say, I gotta...
I have limits.
I gotta stop showing forehead at some point.
So we're just gonna have to crop it here.
Maybe we can come back next week.
And then she's got that dripping camel nose.
And she's got two smile dimple levels.
And she's old, and her eggs are dried up, and she has no family.
See, this is what happens when women don't create life and shape human life and have families and homes.
They become busybody little cunts that go around and say, I don't want him emailing his friends.
Nah.
Got him.
And calling Stefan Moligna a white nationalist is threadbare at best.
Go to 1.5.
Okay, so this is what they're against.
Remember earlier I said I was going to mention that Photoshopping has to be censored?
This is something that the world's biggest social networks are trying very hard not to tackle.
If you don't listen to her, by the way, then you're trying hard not to solve a problem.
If you work with her, then you're trying to solve the problem.
Just like Ron said yesterday, they're Bolsheviks.
All she wants is power.
Nanoodles, that ugly bitch, wants to control people and say who gets what mail chimp and who gets to make what joke.
So go back to that fucking picture.
The very things that Facebook, Twitter, and YouTube sold to us, the chance for everyone to have a voice, how about the hypocrisy here?
For everyone to have a voice.
Has been bastardized by the very worst of humanity and they don't care.
So free speech has been bastardized by what?
Let's look at these pictures.
One, a fake Photoshop picture of Pelosi with a hijab and Chuck Schumer with a turban.
It's fake.
It should be, it's the very worst humanity has to offer.
It's called a joke.
Whoever made that obvious Photoshop joke, why do you keep fucking leaving is saying that there's too much allegiance to Iran coming from the Democrats in 2020.
They're mocking the way everyone was so worried about Soli Amani after he was killed and apologized to Iran, an enemy of America.
This is a clearly photoshopped picture, you can tell by the hands of the Ayatollah Khomeini and Barack Obama.
Also a fucking joke.
It's not fake news.
It doesn't have to be monitored.
See, they want to monitor our memes.
They've sort of bastardized us and chased us down to the last corner of the internet, so we made memes.
And now they're like, no.
I think Facebook actually hired a CNN employee to help weed out memes.
This picture makes Nancy Pelosi look super old and ugly.
That's wrong.
You're not allowed to do that.
That has to be censored.
You can only make her look pretty.
What?
We can't make our enemies look ugly?
They don't do that to Trump at all.
No, Trump's never made to look ugly.
And then the next one I don't get.
I guess this is some person we're supposed to know about and giving the finger, and I guess she technically wasn't there.
Who cares?
This isn't on the front page of the New York Times.
It's just a meme someone's sending to someone else.
So this is what they want to do.
They want to censor it.
Oh, look, they go on to show that that picture is fake.
Thanks.
Oh, shoot.
Whoa.
So you go, so they don't want stuff like that.
But what was Stefan Molynier's crime?
I don't listen to him that much.
I like him, but I want to see some smoking guns, sleeping giants.
And so they show this.
I can't believe I was just defending him.
So it's a picture.
What are you doing?
Nothing.
What's that?
I'm emptying out my yield.
You're spitting more tobacco?
No, I'm eradicating the tobacco.
But you said you were done and you put away the Gatorade thing.
Now you're spitting onto a tissue.
No, I got rid of the entire bulk of the tobacco itself.
Oh, Jesus.
So click on that first one.
This is why he's evil.
And it's a school that's all white and then the same school today, 50 years later.
And it's barely white, mostly Hispanic, it appears.
And he says, we were never asked.
What the fuck's the matter with that?
What if Creighton Elementary was told the people of Creighton saying, hey, we're going to drastically change immigration laws here?
And in about 50 years, whites will be maybe 4% of the student body.
What do you think of that?
But they'd never asked anyone.
They just did it.
They just opened the borders.
I assume this is a California town or somewhere in the southwest.
And they just altered the demographics of entire cities without asking the locals.
That's relevant.
And what about this?
What if those pictures were reversed?
Please go back to the motherfucking pictures.
It's in Philadelphia or Phoenix, Arizona.
Thanks.
Basically that area.
Phoenix, Philadelphia, kind of an area that...
What if those pictures were reversed?
No, no, go back.
And it said Crichton Elementary 2016, and it's all white.
And then it said versus 1968, and it was all Hispanic.
And he said, we were never asked.
Do you think sleeping giants would be pissed about that?
That a Hispanic neighborhood had been made completely white and a Hispanic person said, we were never asked?
Or what if the first picture was all black and then the second picture was all white and it was a black guy saying, we were never asked?
No, sleeping giants wouldn't give a shit about that because they're not about equality.
They're about hating white people.
And anytime you say anything that sounds like it might be pro-white, then it's racist.
No matter what the logic is.
But you could be pro-black, pro-Hispanic.
I mean, the Hispanic political group down there is called La Raza, the race, the brown race.
Imagine a political group called the white race.
Anyway, what's the next one?
The other smoking gun.
Someone sends a thing that says all the top brass at CNN are Jewish.
What do you think of this, Stefan?
He says, big if true.
Now, A, that's a joke, right?
Big if true.
It's like a meme comment thing, Right, B, you don't really know what the context is of that.
Like, she's reading into it.
And I get, what if Sleeping Giants sent out all these things that had swastikas, and it was like me, Laura Loomer, Stephan Molyneux, and someone else wrote big if true.
They could be mocking the whole concept.
And what if he is saying, that's kind of weird that every single person at CNN is Jewish?
Yeah, I think that's worth noting.
How is this hatred?
It's they always said political correctness is the inability to notice patterns.
So you're not allowed to notice that everyone at CNN on Top Brass is Jewish.
And he's also saying, I don't know if that's true.
So those are his smoking guns.
This is why he may not mail people.
He may not email people who want to get an email from him and keep them up to date on what he's doing.
He's also being pressured out of YouTube, which is his only way to make money.
They've ruined his reputation.
So as he himself points out, he goes, what do I do?
Get a job at Chase Bank now?
I'm one Google away from being fired from any normal job.
So anyway, Cassandra Fairbanks says to her, you must have a really boring existence.
Who spends their time trying to get people banned from MailChimp?
Sad way to live.
Which is a very nice thing to say to such a fucking cunt.
And Nanindi Jamini, who I assume is yet another immigrant, goes, I mean, at least I don't work for an outlet that advertisers would be embarrassed to find out they're associated with.
And then she shows a tweet where she had harassed some tiny little place called the Grommet and said, hey, you guys are on Gateway Pundit, which is run by a conservative gay guy.
And it's pretty normal.
It says, hey, so here's her.
This whole threat is her alerting all these other advertisers.
Oh, you're on Fox News.
You're on this.
You're on that.
You might want to divest yourself of that.
So then we go down.
It says, hey, the Grommit, did you know you're funding disinformation on the Gateway Pundit?
And then it says, liberals triggered and outraged after OK2B White becomes top trend on Twitter.
Yeah, liberals were triggered by that.
And the Grommit, the Grommit, by the way, is like a little tiny company that sells bullshit little arts and crafts.
Like, say, you make a Pokemon out of furballs.
And so they amalgamate.
It's sort of like that.
Pinterest or something?
Not Pinterest.
What's that place?
Etsy?
Etsy.
It's sort of like an Etsy type thing, but slightly more production.
And they go, nope.
And that's cool.
Thanks, Nandin.
Great Nandini.
The whole thing reminds me of this idiotic new show, Nazi Hunters.
Because that's who Nanoodles thinks she is.
She thinks she's a Nazi hunter.
And that was a noble thing to be in 1943.
But now, it's sort of like that Netflix show, Don't Fuck With Cats, where it's good.
They end up helping catch a murderer.
Actually, no, the police got him on their own.
But they're obsessed with this guy because he killed some cats and they track him down.
And you think, could you be that dedicated to catching jihadists, please?
Like, can you be going through 4chan and Reddit and looking at pictures and seeing the streetlights and then realizing what city that is and preventing a terrorist attack, please?
Another West Side Highway or Pulse Club or San Bernardino or even fucking 9-11?
Could you do that?
I don't really give a shit about cats.
Sorry.
Someone killed a kitten.
That was mean.
I killed a chicken sandwich at lunch today.
So look at this.
Look, she's got a big black exploitation afro.
Go back.
So in this comedy, I watch it as a comedy.
There's all these Nazis.
It's really just the Sleeping Giants, Huffington Post, Yashir Ali brain.
Wait, did we show Yashur Ali or did we go off at a tangent?
Tangent.
Oh, shit.
Well, we've got to show those tweets.
If you believe canceled culture is real, name some folks who have been canceled.
And then he says, Kevin Hart is not canceled.
Billy Bush is not canceled.
Dave Chappelle.
No, popular black comedians are rarely canceled.
Billy Bush, he seems pretty darn canceled to me.
Where the fuck did he go?
He's gone.
He's gone.
And again, as I said on the other show, Louis C.K., losing $35 million and going and hiding for five years and having his reputation permanently damaged is being canceled.
Just because you're still alive doesn't mean you weren't canceled.
Also, the people saying Bill Cosby was canceled.
He's a rapist.
He wasn't canceled.
He was arrested and sent to prison for rape.
Fucking loser.
And here's the other thing, Yasher.
You're asking of, obviously, you don't know their names unless they're celebrities, right?
But I have a list of 35 Proud Boys who were fired from their job, including cops, Department of Homeland Security.
An entire fire station was shut down because they showed allegiance to Proud Boys.
That's cancel culture.
They canceled a firehouse.
Ordinary folks who don't have fame and money to insulate them are the ones who really get canceled.
Yes.
Doesn't canceled mean the consequences outweighed the crime?
Yes.
Why am I reading this fucking tard?
Criticizing me for my first week, which literally intended to gather names and not make assumptions.
Wow.
Oh, God.
He's also, you'll notice the way that first chick cuts out her disgusting forehead.
He's a big fat chocolate Cadbury egg.
So his picture is just a third of his face so he can pretend he's not a disgusting, obese, self-indulgent, gay Iranian.
But anyway, so Nazi Hunters is a show where Al Chi Pacino plays this old Jewish guy and they fucking, what's her name there?
Cleopatra Brown goes punching old Nazi ladies in the face and they lurk everywhere.
Like, well, here, just play it.
Jordan Peale, by the way, who grew up all white in a white community, going to white schools in the Upper West Side, has devoted his life to exposing How evil white people are.
Just like Colin Kaepernick.
Old garden roof school.
Yeah.
He was beaten by Nazis.
You know how that happens.
She lives through all that just to be shot in her living room by Virgo.
Just pause.
This is exactly like that fucking.
Oh, my mind just went blank.
Oh, yeah, that Quentin Tarantino Jewish porno where they go and they shoot all the Nazis in World War II and they beat them with baseball bats and stuff.
It's like a weird porn where they want to pretend that Nazis were everywhere.
Quentin just cheated and went back to World War II.
But in this, they just create an America where Nazis are lurking everywhere.
Your grandmother's a Nazi.
And they're not just Nazis that sit there and hate Jews.
They're secretly murdering and beating people on the streets.
What about Black Klansman?
Did you ever see that?
What is that all about?
Same shit?
Black Klansman is fucking retarded.
It's about a guy, a black guy, who called up David Duke and said, I want to join the Klan.
And they said, good, we'd love to have you.
His voice didn't sound black.
And then they send a white guy, Kylo Wren, to go join the Klan and be a spy.
And it's all about how a black guy joined the Klan.
Well, no, a black guy made a phone call.
Django is also one of those revenge porn.
Django's another revenge porn thing.
And it's always revenge on white dudes.
Like, there's no black Hebrew Israelites in Nazi hunters.
So it's really, and this isn't like a Jewish show made for Jews.
This is a white show made for whites who want to pretend that Nazis are everywhere and they're doing their best.
They're killing Nazis.
They're sleeping giants.
They're Nazi hunters.
Like, what Nazis, you fucking losers?
Through all that, just to be shot in a living room by Verga.
It sounded like she knew him.
It sounded personal.
Yeah.
I suppose every mother is personal.
I think it's an actual Nazi that shot his grandmother.
So now we're hunting people who were literally Nazis in the 40s.
They're all, what, 93 years old?
And they're still active.
Shooting people, killing Jews.
So it's the geriatric Nazi show.
wide lapels.
Revenge.
Your grandmother wished to protect you.
From what?
Nazis, Jonas.
Goddamn Nazis.
Peace.
Jordan Peel's racist.
Oh, look at this.
Remember the last time you were at the laundromat and there was that guy with a swatsika tattoo?
I see those all the time.
Oh, yeah.
Living here.
Living among us.
They've blinded themselves to us.
You can get away with anything in America.
So your grandmother died.
Just pause.
They've blinded themselves to us.
We can get away with anything in America, us Nazis.
That's the Trump supporters.
This is so outlandish that it's a parody of the liberal brain.
Jordan Peel has made a comedy about how fucking mental bitches like Nanoodles are.
How ridiculous.
Look at that.
You just have to have the black spoiltation chick in there.
That's like if this came from the right and like instead of illegal aliens, it was actual aliens.
So juvenile.
Are you 13?
Look how cool the guy is leaning against the wall.
probably killed three Nazis that day.
So your grandmother tonight created the Nazis.
What is he flicking his switchblade?
We're a lock picker.
Soldier.
Master of disguise.
Shooter.
And two weapons expert.
That is really bad.
That's all pixelated and shitty.
No, it's stylized, bruh.
Yeah, but the cropping is pretty easy.
Like, that looks like something I did.
We would bring God's justice.
What do you say?
He probably hired his cousin to do it.
I could do that.
You want to join the Nazi hunters?
We're everywhere.
We go to churches where rednecks are and we find iron crosses.
Then we kill them.
Killing a bunch of MAGA people.
Look, I know it's hard, but we are killing Nazis.
This is what we learned from Project Veritas, that all these Bernie bros feel this way about America and are planning de-Nazification gulags.
I'm not exaggerating.
If you didn't see yesterday's episode or know about the Project Veritas thing, you'd think I was making a joke.
Okay, I've got a map.
There's 10 Nazis on this street.
Put them in a trunk.
Good work.
I'm going to be in my office making more bombs.
I like to know who you are!
Run, run, run, run.
Run, run, run.
Runaway, Nazis.
This is what I don't get about this worldview.
Why do you want it to be so?
Do you think there's any controversy on the amount of violence exhibited in the show?
Fuck no.
Probably not.
Cut her tits off.
Yeah.
Throw them out the window.
And then I hope they land on a Nazi's head like a yarmulke.
A tip yarmula.
But I think Jordan Peel is maybe just sort of like a capitalist and he's anyone's dog for a bone.
And he noticed that there's this intense white guilt amongst the white people he grew up with and the white mother who raised him and his black dad wasn't around.
Maybe he's joking the liberals for exactly.
He just goes, wow, there's money in this.
Get out was a huge hit.
When I portray white people as like psychotic zombies, it pays the bills.
All right, here's a movie where there's Nazis everywhere and we go chop their heads off.
That's a great point.
Is that what you want?
You want something green lit?
These are the fine.
Okay.
It's just like the climate change alarmist.
Can I get a grant?
I want to study how coal actually isn't bad for the environment.
No.
Okay.
Can I get a grant?
I want to talk about how the world's going to end in a year.
Yep.
Here's $50,000.
Thanks.
Get to work.
Well, you're right.
Okay.
Because every time he frames these ideas, they're fiction and bizarre, like mystical, ghost, evil, cult-y.
They're all super duper fiction.
Like, this is super duper fictional.
Get out with super duper fiction.
And when I see it, it's sort of like that movie, The Hunt, where they were going to hunt MAGA supporters.
I wanted that movie to be made.
Because that's how I'm looking into the Huffington Post brain.
I'm looking into Yasher Ali's stupid mind.
Maybe he really is.
Yeah, I don't know.
All right, we're running out of time.
Let's see if we can catch up on the MB.
Ah, and of course, that stands for the mailbag.
Ryan, shut up, you don't have a dad.
Let's turn our eyes to Gavin's mailbag.
Let me touch it.
We're starting the show with an angry letter from Larry.
Stop giving the groipers attention.
How can you go through all this shit with Richard Spencer and not see the same fucking shit as happening again?
Nick is an anti-Semite, like your last guest said.
He is a racist.
We can just laugh it off as a joke, but if we do, then we must admit that Nick and his followers are clueless and uninformed, which of course they are because they're 14 to 19 year olds on 4chan.
This is not, that's him saying that.
This is not some kind of awesome new conservative movement.
It's 4chan shitposting at best and Richard Spencer 2.0 at worst.
Nick has already said that America First doesn't mean Americans, it means Europeans.
Here's a clip of him admitting he doesn't really give a shit about illegals as long as they are Europeans at 1.27.30.
Yes, it's a five-hour long video, but it actually has great points about why the Gropers are retarded from the point of view of fellow conservatives Zoomer.
But just check out this clip of Nick talking about immigration at least.
Did you get that one?
All right, so next question.
The Giants?
127.30?
To the Smithsonian.
All right, it was time-coded some words.
So here's the clip.
Doormat for illegals.
We have to retire that altogether.
I mean, illegals are a particularly egregious problem, but I mean, let's stop pretending like legal status has anything to do with it.
It doesn't.
You know, I would have no problem if the illegals were coming from Italy, frankly.
Would anybody have a problem if illegal immigrants were coming from Europe?
If they were coming from, and I mean, you know, they're actually Europeans.
If they were coming from England or Germany or France or Italy, I wouldn't have one problem at all.
I want, if there were a way to get 2 million illegal immigrants a year here from Europe, I would say, let's do it.
Let's do it.
I don't care if they're paying taxes, not paying taxes.
I don't care what they're doing.
Get them over here, right?
I would take that.
Okay, that's enough.
That's a pretty common TradCon paleoconservative argument.
Buchanan said it when he said who would assimilate better, a thousand Zulus or a thousand Englishmen.
So we're not saying anything new here.
Lots of people are saying refugees, we should focus on the Christians who are being murdered across the Middle East and northern Iraq and Armenia.
They're saying we should focus on the white farmers in Zimbabwe that are getting murdered.
They're refugees.
Much more than just Mexicans who don't like being poor.
The language barrier is a huge part of all the countries you mentioned, too.
They all speak English.
Regardless, this is a fucking child, Gavin and Milo and Cole.
This is a little kid who's getting attention for being an edgy 4chan shitposting conservative.
Every time he talks, it's in the poll jargon.
His followers don't give a shit about conservatism.
They just go to these public events and read off their iPhones so that their East Celeb will give them a shout out.
This is the exact kind of brainwashing the left does, where the content doesn't matter just as long as dear Nick and the Groipers think it's alpha, bro.
Please, Gavin and Milo, I love you, but if you just slowly distance yourself from this shit, you'll be a lot happier.
It's infuriating to see you guys bend the knee to this kid like he's not just an edgy phase 4channers are going through.
If what he says inauthentic, he fucking hates you, Milo, you're a race-mixing fag.
Well, he did bring that up on Milo's show.
He said, what you do is wrong.
And then they went out and had burgers.
If not, then he's just a joke and nothing he says is really that serious.
Which is it?
Well, that's the million-dollar question.
Like, can you hang out with people you don't agree with?
I live in New York City.
Well, I work in New York City.
If I eschewed anyone who disagreed with me, I wouldn't have anyone to talk to.
Most of the Groipers will grow up and regret being part of this shit.
This guy's big on all caps, by the way.
Regret being part of this shit.
They will disavow it and distance themselves once they realize that saying that the Holocaust didn't happen and that racists shouldn't mix is insane and embarrassing.
They will rebel against it and turn into Democrats.
Please stop giving a stage to this.
Well, he didn't really deny the Holocaust.
He made a joke using a cookie analogy once.
Made it clear it was a joke.
This is sort of like the Molyneux tweet with the big if true thing.
You know, we had another Grouper letter that I should read to contrast that.
This is from Richard.
America First.
Great to see you've somewhat come to accept Grouper as America First.
All the viewpoints are completely reasonable, especially from young people who have grown up in a hyper-liberal society and are naturally rebelling.
Everyone doesn't have to be on board 100%.
Just allow everyone free speech without trying to ruin their lives.
Immigration is the number one priority by far.
Everything else is either a problem so far down the line it's almost irrelevant or is done somewhat ironically for a laugh just because of how poorly it is reacted to.
Ron seems like a cool guy.
Handled the Fuentes topic much better than I expected.
Did Milo convince you he's truly doing God's work?
Well, yeah.
I'm a Zionist race mixer who doesn't care about gays and we're on this exact same page about immigration.
I am a Zionist who has no problem with people who don't want Israel getting money or don't think we should fight any wars for them.
I think that's a valid argument.
Race mixing, I don't take anyone seriously who's against it.
And what are they going to do?
Prevent me?
So that's irrelevant.
And the gay thing, a lot of my best friends are fags.
I've grown up around fags my entire adult life.
But it's true that gay marriage was a lie.
Gay marriage wasn't about marriage equality.
It was about fucking with Catholics And antagonizing Christians into baking cakes.
It was about power.
Just like this sleeping giant chick says to Cassandra, get back, or I'll fuck with your job too.
And you're not doing anything to help if you're not listening to me.
All right.
Um, last letter.
Nandini.
Nick.
Oh, I've put in Groiper in my search, so I'm getting all the groiper letters.
But that's worth it.
Hey, this is from Sarah.
Nick Fuentes and Gavin's Gaines.
I'm not a Groiper, I promise.
Hey, lovelies.
A couple things.
Being that Nick Fuentes was preparing to be deplatformed from YouTube and likely others soon, would you consider having him a part of Censored TV?
Would love to know the reason if not.
Secondly, well, first of all, I think I'd have to clear it with everyone here.
Like, would Laura Loomer want to be on the same network as Nick Fuentes?
Secondly, Gabby Baby, you've mentioned how you're not getting ripped enough.
I can tell you after learning from a personal trainer, you must be lifting, and there's no way you're going to cut fat with heavy alcohol.
It's just not going to happen.
So do us ladies a favor and cut down the alcohol so we can see an even sexier you.
Thanks.
You're slimming down.
I'm getting pretty fucking hot.
You can lift from the bottom, you know?
I'm becoming...
You look the most unhealthy you've ever looked right there, though.
This looks pretty good.
You think you're in a stockade, and they just let you loose.
Having a body like this, it's really hard to get clothes.
That's why I started fucked upmidget.com, where you can get clothes for your weird cerebral palsy body, like mine, that is 90% collapsed ribs.
No, but sorry, this is taking so long.
I mean, look at him, he's pimping.
So the drug I'm taking is clomiphene.
And it doesn't, it's not testosterone.
It just tells your body to make more testosterone.
Look at your rib bone.
Which apparently it's not doing a ton of.
But I only take half a pill every two days.
But I'm pretty happy with these pipes.
Like, they're definitely not the Grovers they were before.
And then as far as the body goes, I'm not flexing now.
That's crazy.
You can see that's Wolverine-esque.
It really is.
Well, look when I laugh.
You can see the faint hue of the beginning of the sperm of an ab that would have to meet the egg to make the ab baby.
But at least there's like ab sperm forming the sides of my ribs.
And being good at it, if you will.
And I'm not disappointed with the fatness either.
That's not, that's pretty normal for a 50-year-old.
Dude, you were sitting and it's like there's not much muffin happening.
Yeah.
And I got those hot surfer things, those little divots.
Just doing the thing.
That's like I could have done a bunch of push-ups first.
Yeah.
You're looking.
Looking pretty fucking sexy.
Getting close to shredded, if you will.
All right.
So that's the latest on the groips.
And censorship and giant fish.
Oh, we got to end with a funny video.
Well, we started with a funny video.
Could be a funny video sandwich.
Let's do the 93-year-old with a gun 2-4.
Is it time-coded?
I'm.
No.
Okay.
It's...
...case out of Las Vegas.
Police called about a 93-year-old man with a gun.
Unit speed visor, shots fired on the 413-405-115.
Users got a gun.
Las Vegas police racing to report the shots fired at a local department complex.
Grandpa's guy listening with Graham's office captures how it all started.
Hi, I'm here to talk about my draining system on my roof.
I've called a few times to maintenance, and I'm getting no response, and it's starting to leak into the house, and I'm fucking pissed.
So what I'm doing this time is I'm not filling out any forms or waiting for an appointment.
I'm going to start fucking shooting people.
So you can sit here.
Yeah, so I'm done talking.
This is, I believe, a Glock.
Elderly male, later identified as Robert Thomas, was armed with a firearm inside the management and was making all the quests.
When the elderly man pulls out his gun, he takes his first shot at a storm.
So anyway, you see that computer over there?
Fuck it.
That's your computers, okay?
So I don't need you filling out any forms on your computers.
Can I leave?
Okay, here you go.
My problem is with the superintendent of the building.
So anyway, you are not doing anything about the holes in my roof, and you seem to think it's not a problem.
So how about a hole in your leg?
No, hey?
Oh my god.
Holy shit.
Okay.
Do I have your attention now?
Hey, shithead?
How about another one?
There we go.
Now you match.
It's like Bernie Goetz where he goes.
Now I'm laughing like this because I've looked into it and both of those shots, the guy's basically fucking Annie Oakley.
Both of those shots just grazed.
The graze wounds, yeah.
Broke his pants and left them with like...
Broke his pants.
And then they shoot the window and he's like, whoa, Jesus.
Take it easy.
I'm just shooting people.
Was that a wise shot?
Why am I the bad guy?
Yeah, is that a wise thing to do?
Because there's a guy lying on the ground, right?
He shoots the floor, which probably not only got to be some kind of a gun.
I think we got some trigger-happy cops here.
Yeah, that was like aimed right at the guy laying down.
From what I see.
Now, he was aiming at the old man, but the glass was too thick.
This is the angle from the surveillance camera.
You can see the officer's bullets.
He's not fucking around.
Yeah, like, wait, wait, wait a minute.
This is bad policing.
They said, put down your gun, and he turns around.
They're already shooting at him.
Look at him.
Hey, these eyes.
Can you play these eyes?
Of course.
Robert Thomas'eyes.
Oh, no.
What did you think was going to happen, Robert?
Why are you freaked out?
I go in, I shoot a guy a couple times, and now I'm in jail.
You can't make a point anymore?
I was getting his attention.
Now you treat me like I'm some kind of a criminal?
Jesus Christ, what's the world coming to?
I grew up in the Wild West.
You'd go into a saloon, you'd graze a guy, and then he'd say sorry.
Asked him if you wanted to.
Do you really have a problem?
You could have dragged me behind a horse or something or lynched me.
Jesus.
What is this jailhouse?
Take my picture?
It ain't even got bars and there's a TV.
I know you gotta take my soul about it.
Pictures.
Get fired.
Get in trouble.
Be brave.
And never stop fighting.
This part could not accept and pretend.
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