I was recently contacted by NYT reporter Rob Kuznia about my aversion to pornography. Apparently, some sex columnist who calls herself Lux Alptraum claims it’s anti-Semitic. The logic pretzel you need to get to this conclusion is a great example of Clown World journalism and how far papers like the New York Times have fallen. Social Justice Warriors aren’t just blogging at HuffPo anymore. They are at formerly reputable papers like NYT and Washington Post. They’re also on MSNBC and CNN. Antifa and Medium are reputable sources and if someone has a Word doc that says the president paid whores to pee on Obama’s bed, well that’s all the proof we need. What was once an exclusive is now an amateur orgy where the password to get in is, “Nazi.” We also go deep into the Mail Bag and discover our listeners insults could do with a tune-up.
It's shocking too when you hear people who don't hate it.
You sort of go, oh you didn't get the memo?
Like they think that it's still the New York Times that it was in the 50s.
When, who was it, Punch Sulzberger?
It's Arthur Sulzberger Jr., his son who took it over.
They call him Pinch to make fun of him.
But yeah, it was flushed down the toilet a long time ago.
Early 2000s is when it really was done.
Bill McGowan wrote a book called Coloring the News, and he talked about the way they report and how bad they are at it.
Like that guy, what was his name, Amadou Diallo?
um he was shot about 50 times and including in the bottom of his feet and um yeah and the story was that the cops the implication was the cops were just like let's go hunting negros die boy and then after he's down they're just like shooting at his feet That was the Times' version, and then, you know, they put cops in danger when they make up lies like that.
The truth was, I think it was in the Bronx, and, uh, the Bronx is a fucking...
Shithole.
The Bronx, the South Bronx in particular, is an absolute war zone.
If you're a cop there right now, you are a dead man.
I was talking to a guy whose brother's a cop the other day, and he said that he heard guys talking on their walkie-talkies about killing him.
Like, yo, there's a cop on my, uh, on my corner right now.
Should I just shoot him from here, or should I go up and blow his head off?
He's like, hey guys, I'm on the same radio.
I can hear you.
Now one time I went away, well last time I went away to Jamaica, I came back and I had a week's, ten days worth of New York Posts, and I just started flipping through them all, and you get a really interesting perspective on New York when you read ten New York Posts in a row.
And the perspective I got was, uh, this place is on fire!
Like they had stories, there was at least three every paper, and the Post doesn't have that many stories.
And it was like guys getting knocked out in the knockout game and then kids just running their pockets, I believe it's called, where you go up to an unconscious or possibly dead person and you take all his money and his cell phone and everything.
It was like one like that every day.
Fires, gang warfare.
There's still a lot of gangs in New York.
DDP, Dominicans Don't Play!
And by the way, the actual shape of the New York Post is so much less You're more pretentious and intrusive than the New York Times.
You read the New York Times in the train, it's basically like opening an umbrella indoors.
You're in everyone's grill.
You're in everyone's face.
And you've got it all spread out.
It's like you're unfolding a fucking map on the subway.
The New York Post is just you.
You're not impinging on anyone else's personal freedom.
You're not liberal spreading.
But yeah, they reported the shooting of Amadou Diallo like it was some sort of sport.
And it was the Bronx.
There was a rash of shootings.
A bunch of officers got placed on special duty to try to take down the murderings that were going on.
They see someone acting suspicious.
I think he was illegal.
I'm not sure.
But he was from Guinea.
Or maybe he was... Yeah, he's from Liberia originally.
And he's acting weird, probably because he's a sketched out African immigrant and doesn't know what's going on.
Probably in his home country, cops actually do hunt for sport.
I bet.
So anyway, he's acting weird and they're like, show your hands, show your hands!
And then he's acting even weirder.
I think he was like messing with the lock of a building where there had been murders.
And it was just, he couldn't get his keys right.
He was innocent by the way.
I'm not saying it was fun to shoot him or it was cool to shoot him, but he was acting very weird.
And the police just followed their training.
Put your hands up, put your hands up.
He refused to put his hands up or do anything.
He kept staring at them.
Then she gets into the lobby of the building.
And then at the 11th hour, he reaches in his pocket and pulls out his black wallet.
In a way that was gun-like.
You know, thrusting it forward.
And they all just panicked, went... And yes, he was shot way too many times.
41 shots, 19 struck him.
Somewhere in the bottom of his feet.
The detail everyone leaves out is that these all happened in about four or five seconds.
This was not a long cowboy movie shootout.
Minor detail there, New York Times.
But stories like that ruined them.
And then they just got worse and worse.
I remember there was this story that I read about straight men who meet for blowjobs in some soccer parking lot.
I've been trying to find this ever since.
And I'm sure it's happened.
I'm sure guys in straight marriages with kids who live in the burbs go and get a beach.
Closeted fags exist, sure.
But the tone of this New York Times article was that it's a trend and you could smell between the lines that it was just a fuck you to families.
Like there's this, if you read it there, there's a lot of single mothers on pedestals and women's sisters doing it for themselves and then a lot of anti-family stuff that you read and a lot of anti-capitalist, pro-socialist stuff like charter schools.
Everything you read about charter schools in the Times is shit.
And my favorite headline ever was, though charter schools thrive, they're not available to everyone or they're still not for everyone.
And that's a double entendre, right?
Still not for everyone, meaning like spicy foods are not for everyone.
No, no, no.
What they actually...
Mean is not everyone can get into a charter school because they're rare.
Because there's so many shitty public schools in New York.
And if you want to see how bad public schools are, just text anyone who grew up in New York City.
Just text them.
And you will see the dollar sign on the other side of the 20 and other shocking mistakes.
Working class people of New York have been deprived an education.
And it's because of the shitty public schools.
And charter schools could save that, but the Times doesn't like that.
And it sucks.
They hate it too, because blacks thrive in Harlem at charter schools, and that's not part of the narrative.
We can't have the free market helping poor black people.
Those are our pets.
And we use them to push socialism.
Don't go stealing my doggies, says the Times.
And then they got so bad that they went bankrupt.
Carlos Slim had to bail them out.
He's a guy who makes money every time an illegal sends money home or calls his family.
He gets a cut and he's since become one of the richest men in the world.
And he bailed them out.
It's not free when someone bills you out, by the way.
Jeff Bezos buys the Washington Post and all his Trump gripes come out through the pages.
Carlos Slim buys the New York Times.
And first of all, there's like three glowing pieces on Carlos Slim and how awesome he is.
And then there's all these stories about how illegals are awesome and we're way too hard on them and yada, yada, yada.
You know, changing the narrative.
That's why people buy newspapers.
So, I had a guy call me from the New York Times recently, and I don't think people understand that when you are being, when you get a call from the New York Times, it's not like a guy in a suit anymore.
It's a teenage, no, I was gonna say, it's a teenage mutant ninja turtle.
Because I'm looking up emails as I talk, and my wires got crossed.
It's a social justice warrior.
It's a little kid.
And their sources are usually Antifa and Quilliam and the same social justice warriors that drive you nuts.
So I got a call from this guy, Rob Kuznia.
K-U-Z-N-I-A.
I think it's a Polish name.
And, uh, he says, I want to talk to you about, uh, I'm doing a thing on masturbation and porn and, and Proud Boys are mentioned in it.
And I understand you're not with them anymore.
That's correct.
I've been forbidden by the FBI from hanging out with my friends.
Um, but would you still talk on that?
I mean, you came up with the idea.
Yes, I did.
I'm happy to talk about it.
And I send them to officialproudboys.com because there's a lot of myth busting there.
And then he proceeds to send me emails with myths in them that are busted on the site.
Um, so he says, he says, I was actually, uh, interested in something based on this article.
And then he shows me an article that was in, uh, what's it called?
Medium.
Now medium is a site where they'll just publish absolutely anything by anyone.
So it's like Twitter basically.
But yet the New York times seems to see it as a news source.
So he shows me this article.
And first of all, I'm really interested in porn and what it does to your brain, and I think that's a cool thing to write an article about, right?
I've said this a million times, but I think porn in a marriage, when you're in the doghouse, you go beat off to a bunch of tens and you no longer give a shit that you're sleeping on the couch.
And I think it leads slowly to divorce because couples separate.
I think it's bad for millennial men, especially now when they're seen as a bunch of rapists.
and they think hmm I could be me too'd and end up like that guy who fucked a mattress girl in the ass and ended up being known as a rapist and it ruined his life because she carried a mattress around with no real trial or Kale Hartman who was also framed or Terry Richardson or Dove Charney the list goes on and on Anthony Cumia got framed So I could just stay at home and beat off and not talk to chicks.
So they get out of the running too.
The next thing you know, porn has ruined humanity.
But the way we, so those are all the serious things.
And every time someone brings it up, I suggest they see the documentary, Your Brain on Porn.
And then I suggest they check out the NoFap.
Those guys are super serious about it.
The way we got to it, I mean, me and Proud Boys and everyone else, is a lark.
I had comedian Dante Nero on my show.
We were joking around, as is our want, and we were talking about not beating off, and this is a, we did this in high school, we'd have challenges, and it was all, you know, it was all, what's it called, honor system.
You would just say, I blew it last night, literally.
Or Seinfeld, it was a Seinfeld episode.
So it's just a silly game, right?
And I said, I could do 10 days.
And Dante goes, I'll do 30 days.
And I go, fine, you're on, bitch.
So we did it as a bet.
And then I would correspond with Dante a lot and I was, I'd say, Hey dude, have you noticed that you're like singing in the shower and skipping when you walk down the street and you feel like you could beat up anyone in the world and you're totally comfortable talking to anyone at any time, even if you're hung over in the morning on the train?
He's like, yep.
And then he became my sponsor.
And I would text him and I think he would text me too, I can't remember, but I'd say, dude, I blew it last night.
I fell off the horse.
And he'd be like, oh, you just got to get right back on.
You can do this.
And yeah, it improved my marriage, improved everything.
It made me fight better in the gym.
It just, it makes you a better person.
Of course you're going to fuck up once in a while, especially if you're sick or something, but generally it's a good goal.
Interesting story, right?
Okay, there's your story.
We got it.
And you could look up, like, there is data on how much porn leads to divorce.
So, you got your story there.
That's not this guy's angle.
Rob Kuznia seems to have a different plan.
He sends me to some chick on Medium who has a big article about Nazis.
Yes.
It is now anti-Semitic to be against porn.
And her article said, uh, said, you know, uh, a lot of the Nazis talk about how Jews dominate American porn and how you're letting the Jew destroy the American family by masturbating.
Again, it's the all cats are mammals, all dogs are mammals, all dogs are cats bullshit.
Hitler used toilet paper.
I use toilet paper.
Ergo, I'm a Nazi.
And I said, of all the... I just bombarded this reporter.
I think he may have killed the story now.
Because my last email to him was, dude, I smoked you.
But...
There's so many things wrong with that.
Yes, it's true that Nazis think that porn is a Jew thing.
Great.
Wonderful.
I'm against porn in Turkey.
I'm against Canadian porn.
Does that matter?
What about German porn?
Is that run by German Jews?
Also, the term wanker has been an insult for centuries.
Ever heard of Harry Palms?
And then this woman, see if I can find it here, I can't seem to dig it up.
But this woman goes off on this tangent about how there's this massive agenda, right?
And what they're really trying to do is control your brain.
So you say, in Proud Boys for example, you say, Okay, you can't, you can't, uh... Sorry, I'm trying to find this text.
Okay, you can't beat off.
Now, she claims, when the man has the desire, instead of thinking about naked ladies, he's thinking about the group.
So it's a way to replace lust with allegiance to the gang.
What?
What?
I gotta just take a little sexist moment here to say that I've noticed a pattern with females in writing where they don't really get to the point.
And you read an article written by a woman and it is often way too verbose.
It looks like the notes for an article.
Like Cathy Young just wrote a hit piece on Dave Rubin that's pretty timid.
And it's like 5,000 words.
It just goes on and on and on and on.
And you're reading it going, what's your point?
I don't know where you're going with this.
If you can't say something in a thousand words, it's probably not worth saying.
And you think, okay, you've written out your general thoughts and this is a sort of a giant bucket where you've thrown in all your notes and every one you've interviewed.
Now let that sit for 24 hours and then write your article.
You want to write a good article?
I was a columnist for 15 years.
Write it.
Then delete it.
Wait 24 hours and then write it again.
And you will have ironed out all the kinks and contradictions and come up with new points.
Oh god, my back's so itchy!
So, she writes this article.
I gotta find it, man.
And makes this all like she just crowbars.
Oh, yeah.
Sorry.
Sorry.
I was doing a sexist tangent.
So yeah, it's it's it's just nattering on and on with no real point.
It's just a big pile of data.
Now that being said, most of my favorite columnists are female.
Ann Coulter, Naomi Schafer-Riley.
Some of my favorite writers, book writers, are also women.
Like the woman who wrote Unbroken.
Wait a minute, what's this book called?
Unbroken... Laura Hildebrand, that's her name.
Or the Great Boar War book.
Shut up.
What's... What's her name?
Oh, Hero of the Empire, that's it.
Hero of the Empire.
That was a book about Churchill, and that was written by Candace Millard.
So, yes.
Though I wouldn't be surprised if half of my favorite authors are female.
That being said, generally, female writers tend to be rambling messes.
And, I see you found it.
Is that it?
Yeah.
Lux Alpatrom?
What kind of name is that?
Futuristic Space Woman.
Why are the Proud Boys so obsessed with not masturbating?
Who says they're obsessed?
Like, even your fucking shit title is garbage.
And this is on Medium, and it's some, like, sex writer.
By the way, when someone says they're a sex writer, they're almost always shitty in bed.
And if a girl is shy and doesn't really want to get into it, she tends to be a fucking rocket in the sack.
So, just keep that in mind.
If someone is a tit columnist, they have shitty tits.
But this girl with the made-up name Lux Alpatran has taken... What is she, uh...
Wife of the sea, mother of dragons, she, her.
Yeah, that's when someone says their pronouns in their write-up, it means I'm lonely.
Here are the pronouns to use when you talk to me because no one talks to me.
So yeah, masturbation bans are popular among organizations that seek to enhance group loyalty.
Yeah, that's the goal.
So both the head and the subhead have errors in them.
The head says, why are they so obsessed with not masturbating?
That's just false.
It's a joke.
It's a dare.
It's a game.
They also, we also say, no flip-flops.
In fact, there's Proud Boys with shirts that have flip-flops and cargo shorts crossed out.
Why are the Proud Boys so obsessed with flip-flops?
Fear of men's feet show a deep, latent homophobia.
Like, they start with this bizarre hypothesis, and then, like a snowplow, just go... through information to get to the end, pushing out anything that doesn't fit their stupid hypothesis.
Masturbation bans are popular among organizations that seek to enhance group loyalty.
Says who?
And you know what else annoys me about this?
It's that academic writing where they basically in school you could say anything.
Hippopotamuses are gay.
And you just need three supporting paragraphs.
And it's, they're really not trying to prove a hippopotamus is gay.
They're just showing you how to make an argument.
You need this hypothesis, then your three supporting paragraphs, and then your conclusion.
And it's just, it's basically practicing debate.
But then these people leave school, and they use that stupid hippo gay shit to crowbar in their own lies.
And the next thing you know, they're trying, they got a picture of me, and they're talking about how fucking the KKK was against masturbation too.
Anyway, this makes me just hammer that fucking guy.
And I point out to him that this cunt Lex Albatreen, whatever her name is, I go through her Twitter.
And by the way, Twitter has ruined left-wing journalists who solicit people for stories and say, hey, I'm a totally impartial journalist.
I'd love to talk to you.
Then you go to their Twitter and it's just Trump bashing and climate change and trans this.
And in amongst her Twitter, I find some guy who yelled Nazi at me at a fucking children's baseball game.
And I go, this is your source, New York Times.
God, I was listening to Howard Stern talk about the New York Times.
And he said, it's a gift from God.
The world would be much better off.
It's an incredible institution.
He's such a bourgeois prick.
He's also the same guy who threw Alex Jones under the bus.
Mr. Free Speech goes, well, you know, free speech isn't free.
It doesn't include hate speech and it doesn't include lying.
And he brought up Sandy Hook.
This is seven years after Alex Jones had made that mistake.
Howard Stern.
And by the way, Bill McGowan wrote another book about the New York Times that is much more conclusive and it's called Grey Lady Down.
And maybe it's because I've read both of those books that when I hear people talking about the New York Times and not laughing I go, what?
How can you not know?
Didn't you get the memo?
It's like the SPLC.
Like there was a story in Spokane, Washington that was written and it made it to the Associated Press and it was,
Hate has a resurgence in the Pacific Northwest and of course they use the same picture that this bitch uses in Medium just basically because when you go to Getty Images and you look up Proud Boys you see this cool picture of me looking incredibly stylish with my skull and crossbones tie holding my fist up by the way and saying Uhuru at a Berkeley free speech rally where Ann Coulter had been banned so I read her speech and this is used as an example of the neo-fascist whatever stupid terms they come up with.
And they use my picture for that.
And they do this thing where they include all these bonafide Nazi groups, and then they throw in Proud Boys and other ones that aren't Nazis.
And that, you know, to the incurious, it all looks like the same thing.
Luckily, the comments were really good, and I had my lawyers contact them and change the picture.
But the Times, the Times, this is how they do journalism.
So when you're reading these articles, know that the sources that they're using are from Medium, Twitter, Antifa.
Um.
So he says, yeah, I was hoping to talk to you about how, according to what I've read, members of the Proud Boys must restrict their porn use to once a month.
I wanted to ask about this and other related matters.
By the way, here are the rules that we came up with.
You may beat off once a month.
Two porn on your own.
Otherwise, every single time you ejaculate, it has to be within one yard of a lady with her consent.
We didn't apply this thing to gays because they don't seem to have a problem getting off the couch and getting laid.
This is for straight males.
And well, what if my wife's pregnant?
Well, maybe she can just like touch your balls or something while you rub one out.
At least you're retaining your relationship.
You're establishing intimacy.
That's what it's really about.
Establishing intimacy.
It's not about brainwashing you to hate Jews.
Like what the fuck?
What are you talking about?
So I said to him, sure I'll talk to you, blah blah blah.
I said, has it ever occurred to any of you, and by the way I also said, whenever I start these discussions with a journalist, especially from left-wing media like the New York Times, I try to start out nice.
Because journalists are petty.
And when you start out going, you're a fucking joke.
They sit behind the typewriter and these little beta male nerds, who are relatively anonymous, They get their revenge and they're like, this blumbering fool was drunk and hungover and he came swinging in smelling of bad B.O.
or whatever.
They just throw in a bunch of bullshit to get revenge.
So I try to be nice but it never lasts.
And inevitably I end up saying the words, you people.
Meaning the left.
I had to clarify that too.
In case he was Jewish and he thought I was being anti-semitic.
Um...
I said I'm tired of media calling everyone who doesn't abide by the latest lefty fads quote-unquote far right.
Proud Boys are multi-racial, multi-ethnic, gays, Jews, couldn't care less about gay marriage, want to legalize drugs, many atheists and outright hedonists, etc, etc.
Stop being such a drama queen.
I said, if you don't play baseball, you're not anti-baseball.
Marie Seinfeld...
And then he's trying to be friendly.
Is the origin the episode where the characters have an abstinence contest?
I think Seinfeld won.
They always do this too.
They're all buddy-buddy with you.
It's like pedophiles.
With the van and the candy.
And they come out and they're like, hey buddy!
Oh yeah, I remember that Seinfeld.
I think Seinfeld won!
Anyway, you're dope.
Fuck off.
I'm not looking for friends.
I've been down this road a million times.
I remember one journalist I sat with at the Village Voice.
Another thing they do too is they lead boring lives and they have no exciting friends.
They live in their little media bubble and hang out with their interns.
So they want to get beers with you.
Especially if you're interesting.
So this guy I sat with, it was after work and I was already at the bar anyway, but it ended up being like seven hours total.
And I explained everything and I made it clear who I am and what I believe in and blah, blah, blah, which is just a normal dad.
And the article came out and it said, Gavin McInnes totally, totally, really badly wants you to think he's not a white supremacist.
And this is after he'd been all buddy, buddy, hanging out and ugh.
I said, it's a very old dare among normal men.
Uh, what else did I say?
Um, oh, and then, and then he talks about, well, they, he shows me some link where some Stormfront guy was shitting on Al Goldstein.
Al Goldstein is like a seventies porn guy.
I'm very familiar with Al Goldstein and his pornography was not pushed by his Judaism.
His pornography was pushed by his corrupt background because he's a mafia dude.
He's much more linked to Italians than he is to Jews.
Al Goldstein grew up in what is now Red Hook in the 50s and 60s where it was totally normal to see a dead body on the street.
Check out the book Growing Up Mafia and if you open up the picture section in the middle he's all over it smoking his big fat cigars.
So if you had to blame anyone on Al Goldstein's New York City pornography, it would be the mafia.
And again, how do you explain other countries and pornography?
Pornography fucks up your marriage if you live in Utrecht.
That's got nothing to do with Jews.
I said to him, this is why that article and leftist thinking in general is shit.
You people, and I've already gone to you people, take an innocuous detail and puff it up into some kind of sinister trait.
It's because you tend to be over-educated pussies.
Well, I'm not really making any friends here, am I?
With no true understanding of what real people are like.
If you're not invited to the party or if the party goers don't take you seriously, it must mean the new Hitler youth has arrived.
Normal, boring fact that all clubs say.
If you don't come to meetings, you're not a Proud Boy.
This isn't an online club.
It's not virtual.
It's real.
That's me talking about the rules for the club and how they're not sinister.
And by the way, if you do beat off and you're in the Proud Boys, nothing fucking happens.
We don't burn you with the logo.
And then I said, ridiculous academic interpretation, colon, the far right men's club only, men's only club demands its members eschew social media and focus on in-person meetings while elder members can control the discussion.
See, I'm, I'm saying a normal thing about a men's club, which is if you don't go to meetings, then you're not in it.
And then I'm showing how they would interpret that.
You must focus on in-person meetings where elder members can control the discussion.
Members inevitably become cut off from their other friends, and the club becomes their only contact with the outside world.
And then he starts distancing himself from the woman who wrote the piece, saying, It sounds like me.
Her piece isn't very accurate.
In any case, my interest isn't in her interpretation, but rather in some of these parallel movements among disparate conservative right-wing groups to swear off point- Why are they so obsessed?
With the far right.
Or what they call the far right.
Why don't they give a fuck about Islam?
They talk about hate groups and hate gangs in New York.
Nary a peep about actual gangs and MS-13.
You know how many black men are murdered a day in gang warfare?
About 20.
Yet the media jumps to heather higher again and again and again.
You know why?
Because they don't really give a shit about the truth or hate or racism or equality or men dying or gangs or violence.
That's all bullshit.
This is all a silly gay fashion trend to them.
And they have their little group and this week it's pretending everyone's a Nazi.
So that's what they pursue.
And I said, if other non-liberal clubs do it, there is no link to us.
We're more closely associated with NoFap.
I'm repeating myself here.
Sorry, I'm telling you things.
I know you've rejected white nationalism in the alt-right, but, what was the but?
Some leaders, this is him talking, some leaders and elder statesmen of these movements, they're not movements!
They're not elder statesmen!
It's not a thing!
Such as Kevin MacDonald and David Duke.
What power do these guys have?
How often do they come up in legitimate discourse?
When was the last time they went, oh, well that shooting was a David Duke shooting.
When are they legislating?
What cultural movements do they dominate?
This is all about thwarting Trump, you realize.
And I don't even think Rob Kuznia and the New York Times know they're doing it.
They don't realize they're doing it.
They actually have brainwashed themselves into thinking they're these civil rights freedom fighters crusading for justice and preventing Nazis.
And they float along based on some bullshit study that says, actually, white nationalism, terrorism, that kind of terrorism is way more than jihadists.
And they'll find like Christchurch and fucking What's my call?
Unite the right.
Alright, am I done with this?
I'm turning into Lenny Bruce.
Why, what did he do?
When he got into it with his pornography charges, his obscenity charges, he would bring his court documents on stage.
And he would just go through like, here's another thing, see?
These cats are claiming that I did a violation.
I'm turning into Tony Sprantle.
It's a violation.
And then he would just bore people to death with the semantics of his court case.
It's one of those things, everyone's more interested in their court case than anyone else.
But I just thought this was a good example of the kind of journalism that goes on today.
I mean, look at his sources.
And, by the way, there was a great thread on Twitter.
I mentioned it on my Telegram, which is real Gavin McInnes, where this guy looked at thousands and thousands of Twitter journalists, journalists in general on Twitter, and linked them to Antifa and saw how many of them were using Antifa as a source, sometimes the only source, and creating these shit articles that get people fired.
You know, I've talked about this many times, but There's a witch hunt going on, which is pretty bad.
But it's a witch hunt run by festering babies.
Losers.
Dumb bitches.
Who say, you want bigots, Kevin?
This is how you get bigots!
Like brats.
It would be one thing if you were up against Gore Vidal.
Or, you know, a liberal of yore.
Where they have intellect and they've looked stuff up.
And they can, they're saying points that you haven't heard before.
I was just thinking today, you know, when people talk about, oh, this is a reputable source, the New York Times or the media, blah, blah, blah, said this about Trump.
You're talking about an era where the media convinced half the country that Donald Trump, the president of the United States, paid prostitutes to piss on a bed that Obama once slept in.
That was a fake document pushed by the Daily Beast and it one day magically became fact because we're living in clown world.
Not one person went, yeah, I don't think that sounds... What's your source for that?
It's like they have no instincts anymore.
And I also said, white supremacist terrorism does not outnumber jihadist attacks.
If you fall for that stat, you're an incurious amateur.
I said, roping Proud Boys into Nazi anti-porn shit is exactly the kind of trick the left uses to pump up the number of alt-right incidences in America.
Catholics are anti-masturbation too.
Are they anti-Semitic?
Athletes avoid it, especially before a major competition.
Do they hate Jews?
And, you know, I used to say, look, tell me something that the Knights of Columbus don't have in common with Proud Boys.
Or any other club.
It's just men's clubs.
They used to be ubiquitous.
Now you're a pariah if you're in one.
And you have to quit your job.
And I can't use that anymore.
You know why?
Because they are calling the Knights of Columbus a hate group.
In fact, I think it was Brett Kavanaugh or some other congressman who was asked, were you aware when you joined a men's only club that it was anti a woman's right to choose?
That was her question.
She was talking about the Knights of fucking Columbus, who are obviously Catholic, and yeah, if you're Catholic, you're against abortion.
But instead of saying this, a charity, the Knights of Columbus, 80, I'm in the Knights of Columbus, 80% of what we do is charity.
And when you go to meetings, a third of it is, okay, we got this raffle coming up, is anyone paying their dues?
All right, this has to go to the sisters, and they're buying more diapers.
Now that's a hate group in today's day and age.
Jews tend to dominate medicine.
Are anti-vaxxers anti-semitic?
I also said if you pursue the angle that no wanks is in any way linked to anti-semitism, me and the Proud Boys are never gonna let it go.
And then I said, do you realize how weird and sad you look digging up the legs of Kevin McDonald and David Duke?
Why not go to any campus in America and ask them about Israel?
Why not follow Ben Shapiro or Alan Dershowitz or Dennis Prager to a college campus?
I said.
And it's true.
Or here's another one I didn't include.
And by the way, don't do that without security.
Because it could get very dangerous.
And I didn't say the north of Morocco.
I didn't say the north of Lahore, Pakistan.
I said the north of Paris.
Then I added, Farrakhan has a box set out with Stevie Wonder and fucking Snoop Dogg.
He also said Jews are termites.
You are focusing on the Covington Catholic school kids doing nothing wrong while the black Hebrew Israelites are right next to them screaming out all the bigotry a New York Times reporter could ever dream of.
That's obviously an analogy.
And another thing these journalists do too is they go, I'd love to talk to you.
Uh, how about Friday at two?
Like back when I did reporting, I would take 24 hours a day.
Anytime you want to talk, let's talk right now.
Yes, please.
You're my story.
Why are you scheduling an interview?
It's not 60 fucking minutes.
We're not sitting down with cameras.
You should have your phone next to your bed.
If you're in this business, there's no time off.
If you're reporting breaking news, And they spend months on these stories, too.
I don't know how much they get paid.
If a story takes you two months, that means you do six a year.
If you're gonna make 60 grand, you get paid 10,000 a story?
That seems like a hell of a lot of fucking money.
I ask because Proud Boys is often mentioned alongside those other individuals in your opinion, but what they have to say is newsworthy.
The piece about various corners of the right is shoe porn for various reasons.
The aim isn't to say they're all doing so out of a sense of anti-semitism.
I have a fact check.
The Medium blog isn't the only article that says the PB has several levels of membership and that swearing off masturbation is one of them.
Yeah, again, The group is called Proud Boys.
It's named after a gay song in Aladdin.
You have to name five breakfast cereals where guys pound you.
They're anti-flip-flops.
There's an offshoot of Proud Boys called the Margarita Boys, who wear Hawaiian shirts and drink margaritas all over the world.
Has humor occurred to anyone in any of these?
No.
They say Bizarre Rituals.
Is it possible it's funny rituals?
And sometimes they just laugh at the name.
That name isn't cool.
Yeah, it's not the Deadly Tigers.
Or Venom Snake.
Or Death Wish.
Or Skull Givers.
We're definitely trying to scare you by calling... Oh, I should... Sorry, I'm not allowed to say that anymore.
They're definitely trying to scare you by calling themselves Proud Boys.
Oy.
Um... What else have I got here?
I already said that.
Already said that.
And then he brings up the whole, what about the fourth degree?
Isn't that beating Antifa?
I had to send him a link that is also on officialproudboys.com where it says it's a consolation prize for when you get fucked over.
And it was invented, I believe, the night Trump won.
Because there was some woman, we're in New York City, throwing glass bottles at a couple who were wearing MAGA hats.
They were there for our party.
We rented a bar that night.
And a hell of a party when Trump won.
And they pushed her for throwing glass at them.
Cops showed up and threw everyone in the tombs.
And they stayed there for, I think, 24 hours.
And they missed Trump's inauguration.
They missed Trump becoming president.
So, we said, you're fourth degree now.
Again, there's a sense of humor in there.
By the way, the guy who was in prison, in the tombs, in jail that night, he told me that all the black dudes that were with him thought they're never getting out.
That's how brainwashed they are by all these bullshit Nazi lies.
So, day one, Trump goes, alright, everyone in every country, everyone in every country, I can't do a good Trump.
Everyone locked up.
Everyone locked up.
Especially the blacks.
You're gonna stay there, frankly.
Just throw away the key.
You're gonna spend a long time.
You got a Jay Walker in there?
He's just sentenced to life.
Seem reasonable?
That's not even a good fictional movie line.
If you saw that in a movie, you'd go, this movie sucks.
So basically, the far left is living in a shitty movie.
These Nazis everywhere.
Antifa being cool.
Needing Antifa to defend people?
The idea that Trump is rounding up handicapped and trans?
That's not an exaggeration.
I saw that after he won.
They had a sign in a high school that said, I stand behind my immigrant students.
I stand behind my trans students.
I stand behind my disabled students.
Round them up, boys.
I'm president now.
I want all handicapped kids dead.
The bottom of cliffs start reeking because there's all these kids with MS just piled up there, rotting.
They just hurl them off.
What fucking planet are you living on?
Um And then he mentions Vox I I go, so this is, I go, dude, Vox, seriously?
Nobody over 20 reads those SJW blogs.
Daily Beast, HuffPo?
I said, the ominous fourth degree was quickly taken out of context by conservative gadflies, meaning flies who fly around conservatives, desperate to find violence and danger where there was none.
You need to understand, you are researching a group that is under an avalanche of fake news.
Going to these sites for information is like asking the Yankees about the Red Sox.
Truly.
They go to our enemies, and our enemies have compiled all these out-of-context soundbites and they go, well, there's our facts.
And by the way, our enemies include Wikipedia.
Um...
Also, please be sure that any probable you're talking about isn't someone who was disavowed or booted out.
I've put together a list of 35 of us who were fired.
They become ostracized and unemployable.
It drives the weak ones nuts.
Some go alt-right.
Some go alt-right.
Yeah.
All right, I'm boring you.
Sorry.
By the way, I was looking at people who've been banned and debanked.
No, not deplatformed on social media.
Prevented from banking.
And I knew them all in the article.
It was Laura Loomer, Joe Biggs, Martina Marcotta, and Enrique Tarrio.
Enrique Tarrio is a black dude who's ex-Cuban.
And ex-Cubans hate socialism and they love Trump because socialism got them kicked out of their country.
But people go, yeah, those black Cubans are racist.
Those black Hispanics are racist.
Martina Marcotta, performance artist living in New York.
She sees these women get old and get forgotten.
If you want to see women get abused, live in New York City and see them just get used as fuck puppets their whole lives and then dumped when they get really, really disgusting and old like 32.
Seriously.
So it's a sexist paradise, New York City.
Ugly old men get to fuck whoever they want, whenever they want.
You get girls way out of your league in New York because the ratio is off.
And so, Martina over time developed a liking for traditionalism.
Thinking, I want to get married.
I don't want to get tossed in the garbage.
I don't want to be some booty call.
That's evil in this day and age.
So she's debanked.
Can't work with Chase.
Laura Loomer.
Laura Loomer is very emotional.
She can be a bit of a bull in a china shop.
We need a bull in a china shop.
Trump is a bull in a china shop.
And as far as racism, whatever goes, she is very concerned about anti-Semitism within Islam, as one should be.
Nothing wrong with that.
She's the only one who called out Farrakhan for saying, I'm not an anti-Semite, I'm anti-termite.
And she pointed out that what do you do when you have termites?
You call an exterminator.
When she handcuffed herself to Twitter, that tweet was above her head.
And she showed Farrakhan's termite tweet and her tweet.
She can't use, she can't bank now.
She can't have a source of income.
And Joe Biggs is a fucking combat veteran.
He was in Afghanistan.
I can't actually can't remember if it was Iraq or Afghanistan or where in the Middle East, but he got hit with a, what's it called?
And I always get the birth control mixed up with the IED improvise explosion, explosive device.
He was soaring through the air in his Humvee in the hot desert.
He saw his pen rotate next to his head in slow motion.
Everything slowed down.
He almost died for his country, but he can't bank because he likes Trump.
That's what all this comes down to.
Big Tech, DNC, Antifa, Soros funded groups.
They're all the same.
They're all the same behemoth.
And that behemoth is doing everything it can to make sure influential people who support Trump are deplatformed, debanked, castrated.
That's what's going on here.
And you have writers like Rob Kuznia going to Vox and Medium and Antifa and all these other sources to talk about the impending threat of Hitler Youth that has somehow risen up from the German grave like a zombie.
Grow the fuck up!
Your life, your entire existence, your raison d'etre, Is a shitty movie.
It's not even a good movie.
It's like you're seeing the world through shit colored glasses.
All right, Ryan, get the mailbag ready.
You haven't been contributing to this episode, so I assume you have the mailbag ready to rock and you don't have to search it.
Like the song for the mailbag.
Of course.
No, I mean.
That should just be on your desktop.
So you double-click it.
It should be a QuickTime movie.
Look at you digging through the crates like a fuckin' 90s DJ.
I was gonna explain.
Here we go.
Ryan, shut up, you don't have a dad.
Let's turn our eyes to Gavin's mailbag.
Let me touch it.
Hey, Gavin ordered the bidet.
He's talking, of course, about Biffy.com, a free sponsor.
It's a super jet.
You attach the tank of your toilet, Biffy.com, and it splashes your ass with such intense water, you don't even need toilet paper.
And if you become a real anal ninja, you can relax your anal lips into a baby yawning, and the next thing you know, you're blasting water up your butt.
As a drunk, I find it very helpful.
And by the way, drunks, if you're wondering why your ass is a mess, it's because you're shitting out stomach acid.
You had 37 shits this morning, because your body's overdigesting, because your body's confused about what's in it, and they think it's poison, so it overdigests.
And the next morning, you have 37 shits from all the work your body's been doing, and they run out of food pretty quick, so the next thing you know, They're burning your ass with stomach acid and bile.
I'm almost 40 and I can't shit without toilet paper.
And read that it looks like someone wiped a rusty 8-inch nail on it after slaughtering someone in cold blood.
Also just want to say thank you for not allowing Ryan's obtuse and borderline handicap responses to your questions and statements go unpunished.
As draining and torturous as he is to listen to, you make it work.
I said old shit on Ryguy in a shit letter.
Dear Gavin, I stopped using condoms, like you said, and now I got fucking AIDS.
Thanks a lot, Kevin.
Sorry, Kev.
You think that's real?
I believe there's a cure for that.
Hi Gavin, this is Tom from Bummingham!
On your latest episode, you said you were in a movie with Amber Heard, and played her lover.
What movie was this, and was your role cut back?
Because I can only find one more time, the movie One More Time, and you were in it for about 30 seconds.
I've never watched the movie, but is it called One More Time?
I think it is.
Yes it is.
Christopher Walken, Amber Heard.
I owned a recording studio and we were fuck buddies in the movie.
So there's pictures of us online next to each other and I always say that I broke up her and Johnny Depp because we look like we're in a relationship because we were being filmed in a relationship.
But yeah, it's totally possible they cut me down to nothing.
You should see me in the studio with her and then I go for a long walk with her where I'm trying to get her back.
But uh, who cares?
Dear Gav, what's your opinion on Showtime performers on the subway?
I was recently subjected to this while heading up to Harlem and the guy was performing solo.
He didn't have great moves and then got really negative and hostile when people didn't give him enough money.
Although I saw multiple people hand him dollar bills.
He said it's a beautiful day outside, I could be out there instead of dancing on the subway.
We didn't buy tickets to his retarded performance and afterwards he's ranting like a spoiled baby.
Thoughts?
Yes, it's called You Don't Have a Dad.
The subway kids are fucking losers and they have no shame because they never had a dad slap them upside the head and say, don't beg.
Don't go on the subway and dance around on a stripper pole.
And then say, can you give me money because I spun around in circles on a pole like a fucking stripper wearing sweatpants and swinging their head by people?
Look, it's not easy to fight seven very fit teens from the hood who have no idea what consequences are, what ramifications mean, so they don't think they're going to jail.
If they beat the shit out of you or kill you.
So it's not easy to just beat them all up and say, get the fuck out of my face.
Though I think I've seen that.
I think some guy, I saw some guy once say, if anyone in those fucking shoes touches me or anyone in the subway, you're all dead.
Pretty big balls to take on a mob of teens, but some of them need their fucking asses kicked.
I hate it.
I hate the loud music I didn't ask for.
I hate the shitty dancing.
It's not good.
You're just swinging around in a pole.
But one thing you could try and don't, you know, don't do this if you don't feel safe.
So don't sue me if you do this and get shot.
But one thing I like to do if I want to confront people and not get stabbed, you do an accent and you come on to them like a very friendly tourist.
Like I do this with cab drivers sometimes, but I'll get to that in a sec because it's slightly different.
I say, Excuse me, excuse me, I'm from a place just outside of Moscow called Shlufngat.
And um... No, that sounds German.
Think of a Russian name first.
Yukrashkis.
Look, I'm from a place outside of Moscow called Yukrashkis.
And where I am from, we have adult dancers and they go on what is called stripping pole.
But it is only women who learn this.
Here in America, men also learn the stripping pole And they're like, nah man, this ain't stripping.
Oh, I'm sorry, I misunderstand.
In my country, it's naked ladies who do this sport.
But here it's for everyone?
Look man, we're not fucking strippers, aight?
That's a fun way to confront, like those guys with the blackberry margaritas, I confronted as a Scottish man.
I said, excuse me, I'm just curious here.
There's a woman having a stella and then you two are having, what are those?
They're called raspberry margaritas.
Sometimes it doesn't work because they don't get mad enough.
Aren't you afraid that the teens would be like, uh, well, actually this is not strip dancing.
This is a form of street urban hip hop dance.
And if I may, your accent seems to come from maybe a Polish blend and like, you might be bullshitting me.
Um, I don't know what, you know, it's like stolen Polack valor.
Yo, what particular county is Ushkerevin in and when did it separate from Moscow as a separate suburb?
Oh, these are very silly details.
I have to go.
It's missing my train.
Goodbye.
We're not at the station yet though.
No, we are.
I have to go.
It's real Russian.
Is that really?
- Okay.
- That's real Russian.
- Is that really?
- Yeah.
- Fucking hate those fuckers.
Dancers are Russians.
I have no feelings for Russians.
They're like my dog.
They can all die tomorrow.
I wouldn't blink.
But yeah, people who dance on the trains and the way they have their hands out, it's just fucking pathetic.
Oh, and then one other one I like to do to cab drivers, you go, they're talking on the phone, some guy from Lahore, Pakistan.
And I go, I'm sorry, you're talking to me?
And he goes, oh, no, I'm talking to my friend.
Wait, that's Russian.
No, I'm talking to my friend.
Oh, OK.
Just sort of confusing, because when I grew up, guys, people who talk on the phone a lot, it's usually 13 year old girls or gays.
Are you a gay?
No!
I'm not a gay!
Okay, I'm just misunderstanding.
It's just different culture, I guess.
Because here, you know, nattering away for hours and hours on the phone, someone who's babysitting, like a girl, who's watching, like, the Jonas Brothers, or a raging homosexual.
But I guess in your culture, it's also, what, straight men?
I'm not gay!
That's funny.
What else do we got?
This one's weird.
Gavin, I ride motorbikes and have been for a few years.
I'm trying to sell one of my bikes now, and the fucking bullshit you have to go through is driving me insane.
I need to fill out this form.
I need to find out how much that form costs by looking through this other form.
They never sent me registration renewal papers, so I have to renew my registration with this other form.
But wait, I moved out since I bought the bike, so now I need to change the address on the registration before I can renew the registration.
I'm now waiting for the DMV to email me my new address papers so that I can fill out the form a second goddamn time to actually get the fresh registration.
And don't forget the close to $200 I'll be out before I can finally sell the damn thing.
Isn't this what I pay taxes for?
So that the paperwork I'm required to have can be at no cost?
I've already set the sail up.
I was ready to rock on and roll in a single day.
I was ready to rock and roll in a single day.
But now I have to wait for my old senile Uncle Sam to put his teeth in and turn his 15-year-old Windows PC 95 on.
Also, I just found out that the EMS services aren't government-provided.
Where the fuck are my taxes going?
They certainly aren't fixing the god-awful roads in Pennsylvania.
This is why Trump won and this is why he'll win again.
I'd like to see that.
A nice curmudgeon bitching.
I noticed that in the burbs.
They're not big on bitching.
We were at this park the other day, and I was sitting down with new parents, trying to ingratiate myself into a neighborhood that wasn't going well.
And I said, this fucking park, how long are they working on this?
It's just a bunch of parts you assemble.
It's like a giant baby playset.
It's like a crib.
Just put it together.
I could put this- I could have built this whole park with five guys in three days.
But instead, it's been what, two years they've been working this shit?
They're not even done!
And then I realize I'm talking to someone who helped set up the fundraiser to build the park and they're like, well, it actually went really well.
We're happy about, you know, there's a lot of paperwork.
Yeah, fuck off.
You're not bitching.
You're not a good parent.
Daniel Bragg.
Gavin, you said you peed the bed often.
I'm 28.
I wake up twice night to piss like a 90 year old.
I think I'd have more restful nights.
Any tips on learning not to pee the bed?
You gotta get your tolerance up.
I have pissed the bed many times post-lent.
Because my tolerance goes back to zero and drinking half a bottle of Makers is just not possible.
You also piss the bed if you have amphetamines or coke because you're drinking more than your body would normally allow.
But once you get your tolerance up, you stop pissing in bed.
But I would also recommend, if you've been drinking like crazy, train your brain to not let your body go to bed and to sleep on a leather couch in the basement.
And then it's just your genes.
Second question, there's a ton of blood on the paper when I wipe.
Why did I become Dr. Shit?
I'm not answering your poo questions.
Figure it out, fuck.
Stupid ass, you useless assholes.
I'm writing this in a hurry.
I met with one of these older, decrepit women in her late 30s or 40s.
I'm 28, and I was trying to hook up, but it didn't happen.
Um, what ensued was a heated conversation with her African-American friend.
I should have seen this coming as she was very outspoken, had said the bartender had mistreated her because she was black, asked me to guess her age.
I asked, how am I supposed to know that?
100?
I fucking hate when people say that.
How old do you think I am?
Especially when men, grown men, it's usually millennials.
How old are you?
How old do you think?
Uh, fuck off o'clock?
You're faggot years old?
I noticed Gary Coleman did that.
He's like, how old are you now?
He's like, Oh, well, you know, I, um, uh, shut up.
Shut up.
I don't know.
You look gorgeous.
So I'm going to guess 22.
I'm actually 25.
Oh my God.
You look way too gorgeous for 25.
I love looking at your cheeks and trying to guess how old they are by the little laugh lines.
Let's look at my face together.
Shall we?
God.
That's a conversation ender, by the way.
You should have just ended the conversation there.
It's the same with astrology.
Are you a Scorpio?
I am not talking to you anymore.
And just walk away.
Guess how old I am.
Fuck off!
Anywho, to break the ice, I asked her what she thought about guys with man buns.
She said, it wasn't any of her business what people do with their lives.
Live and let live.
Yeah, he wasn't about to kill the guy.
Again, he's not Mao.
It's not a dictum.
It's not about to become the anti-man bun law.
So being interrogative, I asked you if there's a line to be drawn for murderers, et cetera.
She admitted that murderers and rapists are an exception.
Oh my God, dude, what are you doing?
If you're with someone who is this not talk-to-able, just drop it.
Like, why would you have an intellectual discussion with a baby?
She obviously doesn't want to explore anything.
You know, a good test is to say, would you rather drown or be buried alive?
And if they say neither, then drop the conversation.
Cause you're not talking to someone who likes talking.
You know, it's a keeper where they make up a third option.
Like I'd rather drink bleach.
I'd rather get shot in the head.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That sounds great.
I'm sorry.
That's not on the list.
Oh, I don't want to do either.
Oh, okay.
Then you're, you're free to go.
Or if they say both, another keeper.
Yeah.
Like buried in wet mud.
Yeah.
While I'm being buried alive, my head's being sawed off.
What a fucking intense nightmare that would be.
It's a 25 foot hole and they just start filling it with wet mud.
You probably start floating up with it for a bit, but then, and then it would hit you on the head and then blah blah.
Damn.
That's awful, man.
I asked her, what are you worried about?
We live in California.
She said, don't we, don't we live in, wait a minute, she admitted murders, she said that four states had already brought up harsh abortion laws.
And I asked her to name them.
She couldn't.
And I said, what are you worried about?
We live in California.
There's no way it's going to get overturned.
And I also said, you know, women are pretty split on the issue, right?
Why are you getting this deep with this woman?
And I've noticed pro-choice people rarely realize that.
That almost 50% of women are pro-life.
So... Yeah, but it's a woman's choice.
Not really.
It's not a gang... It's not a blood's choice to shoot a crip.
You don't get a choice when it's considered murder by half the population.
Anyway... I said that it's funny how this topic, abortion, men aren't allowed a voice while there's no other topic when it comes to women.
Yeah, like... Women are allowed to discuss conscription when men get drafted into a war.
She then brought up rape and said a relative had been raped by her stepbrother at 11, child was born and nothing happened to the rapist, which is not, that's against the law.
Anyway, I'm bored with this letter.
You were stupid to have engaged her.
I heard Trump is saying he wants, um, like exclusions for those type of things, by the way, like reasonable abortion.
You know, the way I am with abortion is I just want the, Entire discussion to stay in the same window of rape incest and 22 weeks right if we could just get it there Then we're good.
That's now.
I'm I'm more of a conception guy Rape and incest I think is an interesting discussion But uh we too far stray from there Okay, here's an interesting one muscular genius Hey Gavin, blackpilled doesn't mean very alt-right, it means cynical or nihilist in relation to something.
Like how John is redpilled on X topic, you would say I'm blackpilled on X topic.
It's BS, it's rigged.
Whitepilled means you've learned something that has made you hopeful.
Huh.
Oh, I didn't know that.
I thought blackpilled was like super duper alt-righty.
These terms are used by people in the alt-right, the new right, and other peripheral reactionary movements.
It's important to distinguish movements further right than Proud Boys, but not alt-right in terms of brands.
The alt-right is unsalvageable, which is unfortunate because the name is perfect.
I think, yeah.
I remember what alt-right two years ago was kind of normal.
You had Tila Tequila in it, Ezra Levant.
It just meant a person on the right who was still cool.
And alternative.
And then there was that NPR, not N, there was some conference at some government building and everyone was there having fun, being silly.
Still wasn't my cup of tea.
It was too right for me.
But Richard Spencer got up and he said, hail H-A-I-L Trump.
Now H-A-I-L sounds a lot like H-E-I-L.
And I think on purpose, he purposely, and please stop saying purposefully.
Purposefully means with acute detail.
You purposefully sew, you purposefully crochet something.
Purposely just means he did it on purpose.
I think he purposely tanked his own movement and made it go farther right and more esoteric.
Just, I don't know why.
It's sort of like a band not signing to a major.
They always want to be on the outskirts.
Same with libertarians.
I know I've told you this story before.
They were really making headway with Gary Johnson.
He was doing really well as an independent.
And then at one conference, this one guy, Fat Pig, gets up and just starts taking all his clothes off.
As part of an important discussion.
And dancing on his underwear.
And I think it was their way of saying, we want to stay punk rock.
We want to stay on the outskirts.
We don't want to be mainstream.
Okay.
Bye.
People like Richard Spencer, Patrick Little, I don't know who that is, David Duke, and straight-up Nazi boomers have made it untouchable by people who share a handful of overlapping views.
Think civic nationalists who acknowledge there are problems with diversity and cohesion between different racial groups.
Before you say who fucking cares, I think it's important for the movement as a whole And I guess by the movement he means the non-liberal group.
Everyone, right of center.
If we can be aware of specific bubbles within the right for our own sake and for the sake of the fence-sitters.
It's like when you made that map of the right on your show.
Although it's not linear, it's more dynamic.
Anyway, big fan, my man.
Watching your videos.
When I was a far-left liberal and you red-pilled me.
Or you pulled me out of that mind virus, thanks.
I think that's why I'm in so much trouble, too.
For red-pilling millennials.
Gavin, superheroes are gay.
That said, I'm surprised you spend so much time harping on them because your hobbies are pretty gay too.
Wow, that hurts.
You're a middle-aged man who likes comic books, shitty punk music, and fashion.
Honestly, I just saw that list of hobbies.
I would assume you like superheroes too.
You lecturing us on gay hobbies is even worse than ex-skinheads lecturing on tolerance because at least they stopped being skinheads before they started lecturing.
Your hobbies are for fags and your shit's all retarded.
Jake E. Jake E. First of all, Jake E. The reason I talk about superheroes so much is because they're everywhere.
Every time I check the news, it's endgame.
I mean, that's finally settling down, but everywhere I go, there's grown men wearing superhero t-shirts.
When I go to the gym, when I go to the train, when I go to important meetings, some guy's got a wolverine on his chest.
Every party I go to, all the bars, they're talking about Endgame.
They're talking about Star Wars.
Especially online media.
You look at Twitter moments.
Checking out the news, wondering if there's been a terrorist attack.
And it's like, the new Jedi trailer shows that women can kick ass too!
Oh my god.
You gotta see the new Batwoman trailer.
It is un- it's a lesbian The new Batwoman is a lesbian whose black female wife was in the NYPD and she was killed by bad guys, so she's out for revenge.
And all the men are bumbling fools going, whoa, what?
You shouldn't go in there!
And... Or, if they're not bumbling idiots who are scared of her, they're, you know, fucking gigantic deathly murderers who she kicks the living shit out of on a regular basis.
Four at once, no problem.
So...
That's why I harp on them so much, that that one's shot down.
You're a middle-aged man, that's true.
Who likes comic books?
Not really.
I was a cartoonist in 1991, and I've tried to explain the context of that in terms of living in Quebec and French culture, bande dessinée they called it, but I understand it's a hard sell.
I don't really see comic books anymore, and I definitely don't look at superhero comic books.
So we're not counting that, I'm afraid.
Shitty punk music.
Again, I don't listen to music anymore.
I mean, in the car I'm listening to Howard Stern, or Raw Dog, Comedy, or Patriot Radio.
Having kids ends music.
Because I was listening to Memphis Rap, Three Six Mafia, and Project Pat, and stuff like that.
And metal and stuff that's scary and has swear words.
The kids hate that kind of shit.
So I couldn't listen to it in the car, couldn't listen to it at home.
And you just sort of Wean yourself off it.
The practice of the next thing you know, you're not listening to music.
So I don't listen to music.
I talk about punk music because my show starts with punk or it starts with music, sorry.
And that's my background.
But sorry, haven't put on a musical record in a long ass time.
That's two strikes.
And then fashion.
That's called getting dressed.
Like, fashion as a hobby implies that you go shopping all the time, and you have catalogs and stuff, and you like a new designer.
Just because you dress well doesn't mean fashion is your fucking hobby, you dunce.
So that, I'm sorry, I don't mind getting shat on, especially when it's accurate, but that was just pathetic.
All right, I think we're running out of time here.
I'm stoked for the new website.
We'll be there, any info ahead of time?
No, I'm gonna wait.
I'm fighting Copper Cab.
Uh, this week.
In a private gym.
And that'll only be available on the site.
I was nervous about it, but he's getting on my fuckin' nerves.
With all this, like, uh, cause I offered to pay for his flight and everything, and now he's like, Is there gonna be money for food?
What?
Okay, can you meet me at the airport with some money for food?
I go, what are you, a homeless man?
Also, I can't get a check because my bank's really small and there's no Brent.
Fuck off!
You know, an adult says, yeah, let's agree on this price and then invoices and then he gets the money 30 days later.
Not, can you meet me when I get off the plane and put jujubes in my mouth?
I'm hungry.
So it'll be fun punching him in the fucking face.
And I don't even care if he wins.
Because I definitely am going to get some nice blows.
And I don't mean fellatio on the way down.
Um... Blah blah blah.
I want to find Gavin McInnes is a fucking asshole on IMDB.
I had that as a DVD for a while.
It's just a collection of my sketches.
I have some copies at home.
I don't know.
Who cares?
That's a really old compilation of comedy sketches I put out in 2008.
Um, thanks for doing what you do.
My friends and I are loudmouthed shitheads when we talk politics, especially with soy-infused beta lefties.
We are sick of our choices, faith in the Constitution being shit on on the right, being too polite to return fire.
Having you espouse traditional beliefs in a funny, endearing way is akin to bringing a bazooka to a knife fight.
He's trying to use big words that aren't in his normal vocabulary.
Um, alright.
Thank you, man.
That letter was boring.
I have a letter.
I have a letter.
It kind of pertains to the wanking.
It directly pertains to the wanking.
Oh, I like how you say wanking all sexy.
Tonight I'm gonna get up to the wanking.
Hey honey, tonight's wank night.
God, imagine your wife lusted you so much that you had wank night.
Can I watch you wank?
Or she'd just watch you beat off and she'd be like, oh my god, that's so hot.
I think they have a pill for that.
I saw a horny pill on TV.
It was like, men have erectile dysfunction, but women have trouble with blah blah blah arousal too.
Yeah, it exists.
It's called a gift card for Sephora.
Nice one, dude.
Thanks, man.
Good fucking joke, bro.
Yeah, there's no laughing.
It's just like, dude, that joke rocked.
Fucking awesome joke, bro.
Dude, you fucking nailed it.
Great setup, punchline rocked.
So this is a little poo-pooing on the advice of the old no winks.
Okay, morning.
Love your work and all that, my favorite podcast, but I think you're spreading dangerous misinformation about this non-wanking shit.
Caveat, I have a malignant ball removed a few years ago, so this may only apply to other single shooters, but I'm on the back... Oh, minor detail.
That's a pretty big detail, but I'm on the back of like a month, maybe even two, of unspanking and I'm writing right now from a fresh ball doctor's office after being given all the all-clear from recurring testicle cancer.
Good job.
Yeah, you sound like a typical case.
My remaining bollocks been on fucking fire for the last week or something.
Still is.
Was almost choosing coffin sizes.
Was considering the most polite and convenient form of suicide.
Emotional shitstorm.
Anyway, skipping to the end.
Okay, so this guy His balls are so fucked up.
His genitalia is so destroyed that he's considering suicide.
Yeah.
And he's here to tell us about genitalia.
Half of his genitalia.
How to keep your dick right.
Yeah.
Anyway, skipping to the end, I didn't mention this to the doctor, but I'm putting it all down to this born-again wanking shit.
It's rubbish.
It gave me terrifying ball pain, terrifying psychic pain, and it didn't help me want to bang the old lady at all, which is probably my main motivation.
The fact is, it just made me want to assail anything else with an observable pair of tits, and to which, disgustingly, I genuinely regret to say, I did.
I got spaz a few weeks ago and poked this grotesque cougar who's been stalking me for years at the pub.
I never would have thought I was capable of it and I couldn't be less attracted to the chick.
A total professional rapist fat bird by the way.
Preys on the drunk and helpless around three in the morning and strikes me like a clumsy Glenn Close.
I was destroyed and carrying a little liter of spoiling spunk in my bag.
I had no chance.
And now God punishes me.
So I blame you cunts, and to a lesser degree, dot dot dot, myself.
You're selling a bag of shit.
Cheers.
Well that was mean.
But he's leaving out a major detail.
How long did he go without beating off?
We never, like when we say don't beat off to porn, we're not saying don't come.
In fact, I think that's a nofap thing.
I think they have some weird details where you, you can't jizz for like 40 days or something.
We never said that.
We're happy with you blowing a load 10 times a day.
Okay.
That's maybe a bit rough, but you know what I'm saying?
So if he went like a month, that's not what it's about.
It's about getting you off the couch.
Hmm.
So what is the maximum?
It's once a month, right?
Didn't you say that?
Yeah, that's how much you can beat off, but you're supposed to be ejaculating once every two days?
But with a female?
With a female.
Gotcha.
So he's either got a problem with his relationship, or if he's single, he's not getting out there enough.
Like, even if you're a single male in the city, you should be getting laid once every three or four days.
And if that means fucking a fat pig once in a while, fine.
That still means you're fucking a babe once a week.
So I think this guy's problem is not that he wasn't wanking, his problem is that he was not, uh, fucking, uh, what's the word I'm looking for?
Normal?
Um, he wasn't ejaculating and we've never been against that.
So that's just a misunderstanding.
Also, he's got, I wonder if, uh, two balls worth of semen fills up the, just the one, you know?
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
That's another thing.
You have a weird dick, dude.
Ball.
Well, genitalia.
Yeah, he has weird genitals.
All right, are we done?
I think so.
Good.
Oh, we've got a new sponsor coming up, but I'll announce that.
I'm not announcing the name of the site or anything until it's done.
I like you more than a friend, and as we say on our new show, which should be launching, well, the schedule says June 1st, but I don't want to launch it until it's perfect, so it might be a little later than that.
But it'll be launching there with my Copper Cab fight, some debates, Roger Stone, Cornel West, Milo Yiannopoulos, Nick DiPaolo, that little chick Soph, lots of interesting people you haven't heard of, and crazy shit like that.
