Get Off My Lawn Podcast #102 | Why is everyone at the ski hill wearing a goddamn helmet?
Ryan Katsu Rivera and I just got back from skiing with the family in Okemo. No. that’s not a hospital for Irish cancer patients. It’s a ski hill that’s one of the best family-friendly ski resorts in the North East. Why don’t we revere that more? Why don’t we think of the risks and hard work businessmen put in to a project when we go to a ski hill or a water park or even a building? I think our apathy towards entrepreneurs comes from a general malaise towards men’s accomplishments in general. In an effort to appease feminists we have castrated men and made them into pussies. PLEASE ANSWER THIS QUICK SURVEY! https://survey.libsyn.com/getoffmylawnpod
Why is everyone at the ski hill wearing a goddamn helmet?
Alex Jones, when he says goddamn, he says he's not taking the Lord's name in vain because he's talking about people he wants to go to hell.
So goddamn them to hell.
I don't want people who wear helmets to go to hell.
I don't want, you don't, you shouldn't be in a lake of fire for eternity if you wear a helmet.
But you should be made fun of because you look ridiculous.
What is going on?
I grew up in Canada where everyone skied.
It's not an upper middle class thing the way it is in America.
In America it's for rich white people.
Not even Jews.
I said to Ezra.
Levant.
I go, hey man, we were at a resort.
Oh, chemo.
And I go, it's just great.
It's great for the family.
The kids are off screens.
You're sitting there one-on-one with them on the chairlift and it's exercise and it's just cool.
You guys should do it.
Did you ski?
And he goes, uh, no.
He said, yeah, do your Ezra Levant.
Uh, no.
Where, where Jews don't ski.
Uh, yeah, uh.
Um, Gavin, um, we don't do that.
Um, yeah, uh, we don't ski.
We don't.
It's like when you see Jews on horses and you say, uh, we don't do that.
That's what he said.
He said, we don't belong on those things.
That's hilarious.
Um, but we were also joking.
There was a, there was, you'd see like one black guy a day and we were joking about how funny it would be to go up to him and just be like, Hey, Hey, Hey, uh, What are you doing?
Let's go.
Let's go.
Party's over.
If there's a kid in a bar or something, or like someone on a roller coaster ride that's too small to ride, and they get caught.
Yeah, I was saying like, he would just acknowledge it and be defeated, be like, damn, man.
He goes back home, and he's like, this fun lot lasted.
I almost did it today, guys.
Yeah, and he gets back home.
He says to his black friends, yo, I got kicked out of Okemo.
And they go, oh, how long did you last?
Oh, I went to like 1 PM before they noticed.
Party's over, pal.
Na-na-da-da-da-da.
Come on.
Oh, then I realized, you know what would be fucking amazing?
You know the black guy, and you tell him in advance the plan.
And he's like, yeah, okay, that'll be funny.
So then all these white people who, the richer and the whiter people are, the more they cherish visible minorities, because they resent themselves for not having more black friends.
So it's not a joke that works in the Bronx, but you go up to him and you go, hey, hey, buddy, buddy, come on, what are you doing?
And he goes, ah.
You might have to make it a little more obvious.
Yeah.
Like maybe like, hey, there's a black guy here.
Hey, hey.
And then you say to your wife, honey, look, there's a black guy here.
And then you you make that clear.
So that pisses people off.
Yeah.
And then you walk over and go, buddy, buddy, what the hell?
What?
Let's go.
Let's go.
And then he is despondent and takes off his skis and starts walking away.
That would be a fun one.
You know, you know, be really funny if everybody around were like, Yeah!
Oh my god, that would be so terrible!
And you're like, oh shit!
I'd be like, I guess we're leaving too!
No, but they do think they're precious, like any type of city people, like upstate, you know why?
It's like when you see a deer and you live upstate, you're like, fuck those things.
They have their issues.
I do think they're beautiful and cool, but they have their flaws.
And people from the city are like, yo, that's a fucking moose, dawg.
Yes.
You're like, that's not a moose, dawg.
But in the city, Ryan, to be clear, your analogy is pretty racist.
It's entirely racist, I'm sorry.
I don't see black people in Manhattan and go, fuck, what are those deer doing here?
I did say they're beautiful.
No, that's a terrible racist analogy.
That analogy just fell apart altogether.
But you know what I mean.
The rarity of it.
Yeah, but wouldn't that be terrible if you did a joke like that and as you were walking away some guy pats you on the back and goes, thanks man.
I was gonna say something.
That's how I know that we're not very racist.
You go to a place like Vermont, it's super duper white.
The people are whiter than the snow they're skiing on and they would absolutely hate that.
They'd be like that.
I felt loved.
I'm a visible, I'm a VM, visible minority.
You're a Vim?
I felt loved.
No one cares about race, or no one cares about gays, no one cares about trans.
This whole like, trans thing.
They're trying to erase us.
No, I'm just not listening to you.
Like, if you don't give them a bathroom, or pay attention to their pronouns, you don't want them to exist.
So that's like saying to someone, if you don't tip your hat to me when I walk by, you want me to die.
No, I'm just not doing that.
I won't be ignored.
That's what it's like.
Sorry, you're getting ignored.
And it's funny, because I lived in the city for a quarter century, and then we moved to the suburbs, and one of the first things...
I noticed was no one talks about gays because they're not here.
Like in the city, you can come up with anything like a bubble gum tax.
And one of the first questions is, well, what do the gays think?
And have any gays weighed in on this?
And, oh, how are we doing with AIDS?
And what's going on with the gay stuff?
And it's just part of your group.
And then you move to the suburbs, and no one dislikes gays.
It's just gay marriage.
Nothing gay is ever mentioned.
It's just sort of usurped.
It's removed from the equation.
It's something fun to gossip about if somebody comes out, but I remember in school it wasn't a big deal.
They were just like, yeah, he's gay.
It is almost like a token gay friend too, where you're like, I'm being nice to him.
People would be Overtly nice to people.
Well, it's what you do with your asshole, really.
Yeah, it's none of my beeswax.
And it's none of my business.
Like if there was a couple who only did anal.
A straight couple.
Imagine them mad at you for not caring and being like, oh, excuse me, we're an anal couple.
Can I read a book in front of your kids?
No!
Probably has to do with butts!
Get out of here!
No one cares about me and my wife's anal habits.
I'm an anal couple.
Excuse me, we're an anal couple.
We matter.
We're having a parade.
You're what?
We're having an anal parade.
Yeah, that is odd.
And then they go, no, it's about a lot more than anal sex.
Okay, so can gays be criticized then?
Because if you're a group that has a characteristic, and it's all cohesive, then that characteristic could be criticized.
If you can be proud of something, then other people can criticize it, no?
Yeah, yeah, that's a good point.
You can be proud of being left-handed.
Can other people criticize being left-handed?
You can't create a culture and say, we're a culture, and then also say, we're all perfect and no one can criticize this culture.
It's either a thing or it's not a thing.
Yeah, that is odd.
Anyway, skiing is the excellent, it's the antidote to the screen problem.
Whoa, struck a nerve there?
Oh, excuse me.
It is.
It's the only way to get your kids off screens.
I don't know what you do in the summer.
I've heard buying a boat.
is a way out of it.
And you don't have to buy a yacht.
You can buy just a little motorboat, a little outboard motor on a little tin can and take the kids fishing or water skiing.
When I was a kid, we would go water skiing and the boat was nothing to write home about.
Just one little motor, little tin can thing.
It's funny, all of these pursuits that I did as a hoser kid, a lower middle class kid, are now stuff of the elites.
Like golfing, golfing when we were kids, you just have like jean shorts, Chuck Taylors and a six pack in a backpack.
And you'd have like four clubs and you'd lose a box of balls throughout the course of the game.
And it was, it was not, it was not for country clubs, but here in America you get, there's still white trash golfing.
I managed to find it, but a lot of it is like a club that's $60,000 to join.
Yeah, that's kind of weird too, because you're going through this huge process to go do something that you would just flippantly do.
Was the process to go snowboarding and skiing way easier in Canada, since everybody's doing it?
Every weekend, that's all.
And there'd be, the average, it was in Carp, Ontario, and there were these farmer's kids called Carpies, and their uniform was a baseball hat.
A ski jacket, jeans, and a cigarette in their mouth.
And that's how they'd ski.
It's also how they would, in high school, at the Earl of March in Canada, they would still wear that.
So they'd have their jeans and their ski jacket, they'd wear their ski jacket in glass.
And their hats, their baseball hats, would just be resting on the tippy-tip top of their heads, like a mosquito could knock it off.
Oh, okay, yeah, I know that style, yeah.
I remember once I had, I was a punk rocker, and my head was shaved.
And it was blonde with leopard skin spots I had painted on with black dye and a paintbrush.
And Scarpy goes, you need a fucking haircut, guy.
I'm like, dude, my head's shaved.
You got the wrong insult there.
You need to fucking hair change.
You need your hair grow or you need your hair dyed brown?
I don't know.
You're going to have to take me to the salon to undo this, dude.
I'm going to start calling people Guy for sure.
Oh, fuck.
That's how they talk down there in Ottawa.
Hey, Guy.
You sound like fucking leprechauns who just had a big coffee.
Just did a fucking key bump.
Fucking, look at McKinnis there walking down the two foreigners aren't fucking coming back from the Big Apple, eh?
Look at this, fuck.
I go, what?
You sound like a leprechaun being tickled.
Fucking look at this guy over here fucking walking down the street, fuck.
Is Faith Goldie a carpe?
No.
She does have a, it's rare that in Toronto they have such a hoser accent.
I don't know why she has that accent.
But I go, Faith, you're one of the most talented people in journalism.
You're an incredible orator, and don't make that sexual.
She did a speech once with Rebel where I said, you're going to be the next Prime Minister, guaranteed.
But if you're going to have a national or a North American, a continental appeal, you gotta fucking lose those boots.
Like, literally go to a speech therapist and stop saying a boot.
It's fucking, you should hear it when she gets a fucking dart, we call cigarettes darts in Canada.
Oh really?
When she gets a fucking dart in her mouth, you should fucking hear her go.
She smokes, you know.
Oh yeah, fuck.
When we were in Israel, she's like, I want to fucking come back here.
I can't believe that fucking the Muslims have taken over Bethlehem, fucking Jesus's birthplace, fucking there's a million Muslims praying right outside where Jesus was born, eh?
And there literally is, Bethlehem's not remotely Christian anymore.
She goes, I'm going to come back here, fucking start breeding.
Fuck.
And then we were joking about how there'd be a statue of her once it became Christian again, and it would be her with a lumberjack jacket and a dart in her hand and a Molson Canadian and a toque.
And then all her Christian ancestors in Bethlehem would have that accent, just like in Quebec.
The accent is... All of Israel sounds like Faith Goldie.
Yeah, in Quebec the accent is that.
That like, bon ben, qu'est-ce qu'il fait bon là?
That's a redneck from rural France 400 years ago.
So my joke about hosers in Bethlehem is actually true in Quebec.
They have a Faith Goldie accent.
There's a funny clip where you mock her lightly.
Oh really?
Let's hear it.
You plug that into the board?
How does that work?
I'll just take a second.
How are you?
Hi there, Gavin McInnes.
I'm very well.
How are you doing?
Hi there, Gavin McInnes.
I'm very well.
How are you doing?
That is such... It's irresistible.
I cannot resist.
It sounds like you're listening to a different language almost.
Hi there, Gavin McInnes.
How are you?
And she's the perfect amount of offended when I do it too.
She's like 13% offended.
And she's half smiling because she's like, you motherfucker.
She doesn't even know it's coming.
If it was over 50%, you'd go, I'm not doing this.
Um, but yeah, when we were kids, you'd go skiing and you'd wear what I was wearing last weekend, just like a lumberjack shirt, like a tartan, a flannel jeans, uh, and a baseball hat.
And you, you wouldn't even wear goggles.
You'd have your glasses on or whatever.
Sometimes you'd have goggles.
Um, and we would do, there was a popular movie out at the time and there was a scene in it called the Chinese downhill.
Where they would race down to the bottom of the hill and, uh, they would, uh, just destroy each other on the way down.
And, uh... What's the movie?
Oh, there it is.
It looks to be... Hey, look!
He's wearing a Mets hat!
The hot dog, the movie.
Is he wearing a Mets hat?
That's exactly what I was wearing this weekend!
Yeah, but... It's the same hat!
You had an orange vest.
Is that a fucking... Oh, that is!
It's a Mets hat!
That's great.
Holy crap!
Yeah, you looked super cash, dude.
I know, no one was dressed like me.
I was dressed like the 80s.
Yeah, it was 80s.
Every single person on the hill has a helmet on.
Are you retarded?
Are you a baby?
I guess it's okay, my kids wear them, fine.
It's okay on little kids, little Johnny's five.
But you adults!
What are you gonna do?
You're gonna hit a tree?
How many times has someone hit a tree?
Are you all related to Sonny Bono?
What was it?
It was Sonny Bono, and then I think it was Liam Neeson's wife?
Oh yeah, that's right.
I found that out when you had mentioned it at the thing.
That sucks.
Okay, so two people died.
And I've brought this up before, and people say, that clip better not be playing through the board, by the way.
I brought this up before and people go, you know that 98% of fatalities on ski hills are from people not wearing helmets?
And to that I say, okay, and how many is that?
One a year?
98 sounds pretty big, but if it's five people...
Six people die a year from spider bites.
If you're in that range, then your risk is irrelevant.
Okay.
We don't live in the Amazon.
There's some few black widows in, uh, in New York.
Um, you're not going to get bitten by a poisonous spider.
Eric Garner's wife.
You're not going to hit a tree.
What?
Eric Garner's wife.
I'm going to take that out.
Black widows.
Oh Jesus.
I'm so sorry.
Um, You can leave that in.
Okay.
It's rude.
Oh look, they wear protective gear on their Chinese downhill.
You're about to say it's rude.
We didn't wear that.
We would just... So this is what we'd do.
You'd be bombing down the hill and you'd see your buddy, like Rick Lowe, and then you just have this awesome James Bond thing where you know when you're really bombing down a hill and you veer to the right?
You get this incredible velocity where you're just like... And I would just come barreling at him and then crash!
Send him flying!
It would be what we call a yard sale, where it would just be like ski, ski, pole, pole, hat, glove, for about a mile.
And it would get done to you too, obviously.
And that's how we'd get down to the bottom of the hill.
We would kill each other.
And then you see these people wearing helmets because they might bonk.
Oh, we saw people.
I saw people on snowshoes this weekend.
What the fuck is that?
They're walking on a ski hill.
Do you also ride your bike on a NASCAR trail?
What are you doing?
What are you doing?
I might fall and hit my head.
Yeah, you should wear it when you walk around Manhattan, too.
You never know.
You might bonk your noggin.
I hate bicycle helmets.
I was a bike messenger for five years in Montreal through the snow, sleet, and hail.
I never wore a helmet.
And I never had a bunch of accidents.
I've been hit by a car a million times.
I just ran into a car the other day and my shoulder's all messed up.
It's still messed up?
Yeah, when I box I can't do a left hook.
I think I may have fractured a bone.
Anyway.
Yeah, it's just like the water bottle shit, where people go, yeah, tap water can kill you.
It's made of iodine and LSD.
So all these women walk around with, that's why purses are so big now.
Purses are gigantic to hold this stupid water.
They also think it makes them thinner.
Because they just pee out all the calories.
You know, I do have to say, I've been thirsty around women before, and they're like, yeah, I got some water in my purse.
Like, an extra unopened one.
Oh, they have theirs, and then the guests?
They have a guest house in their purse?
And it never would have occurred to me... You know, gum is something you could always ask a girl with a purse for, but I've seen bottles of water being pulled out of purses.
You're absolutely right.
And the purse industry, by the way, in New York is 100% of retail.
Wow.
If you go look at a map of New York, right, Google Maps, and start zooming in, and you'll see every icon for every store, like on 6th Avenue by Macy's, the icon is a purse.
And you go into these stores, Macy's or whatever, and the bottom floor, Prada, all of those, Louis Vuitton, the bottom floor's all purses.
These women and their fucking purses.
Everything drives me insane.
Nothing is logical anymore.
Why do you need more than one purse a lifetime?
I don't understand.
Why are you wearing a helmet?
You're not gonna fall.
You're not gonna hit your head on the fucking snow.
And if you hit your head on snow, it doesn't hurt.
You're not gonna get a concussion.
And you don't need water all the time!
You don't need to hydrate, that's a lie!
You need to have 1.7 gallons a day in order to what?
How many people have died of dehydration?
Please tell me.
As we say this, by the way, we're watching a guy fall down a ski mountain.
Ooh, that looks rough, too.
But that's an action film in a crazy, hysterical plot about Chinese downhill.
You know, people really did survive without water for a long time.
Or minimal water.
We didn't have clean drinking water in New York until what, the 1860s?
Everyone was drinking alcohol.
Little kids were drinking beer.
And they barely drank any.
Remember when it occurred to us the other day that, uh...
That beer was never cold back then?
Yeah.
All those saloons, all those Westerns, you're watching someone, uh, drink hot whiskey and hot beer.
Cause it wouldn't just be warm.
It would be hot.
Yeah.
Oh, what's worse than a hot whiskey?
That's a bummer.
If I was, when you're hung over and someone presents one plate has a hot whiskey on it, the other plate has a cock.
And you're like, hmm.
This is a tough one.
This is Sophie's choice.
I might dip the cock in the whiskey, but I'll definitely take the cock.
Wait, so who does the cock belong to?
Is it Brad Pitt?
It's a homeless guy.
No, they don't all have the hot whiskey.
I only suck off hunks.
That's one of my rules.
That is a good rule.
I only suck off hunks.
That's a t-shirt.
Yeah.
Oh my god, imagine you wore a shirt like that.
You can wear it in Chelsea.
It's like gay Harlem.
They would love that shirt.
People would stop you and say, where can I buy that?
Dude, by the way, you lent me your snowboard pants, the waterproof ones, and you didn't even need them.
You didn't fall once.
And you would do the thing where you'd almost bomb into me, like you'd come super close and then just skid.
Yeah, I came so close to just drilling you.
Did you think in your mind, like, I might hit him?
Well, oh yeah.
But there's times, like, it was kind of icy there, so there's times when I thought, if I really destroy this guy, he's gonna break a rib.
But if you were near some powder, I would have fucking...
Killed you.
The first day would have been the day for that.
But all you do is fall.
I fell a lot.
It's so frustrating.
I don't think you know how to snowboard.
Well, I was doing good for a long time.
Like, a lot of it isn't falling.
Like, I did make it down the mountain.
No, you just—my son, my five-year-old son, had to sit and wait for you many times.
You know, that was another funny thing.
He thought—you know how you have to do a pizza slice to go slow?
You put your skis in a V, and he goes, Dad, Dad, Dad, when you do this, when you make your skis a pizza, you go really fast.
And I go, no, dude.
When you make your skis parallel, that's when you go fast.
You do the pizza slice to slow down.
And he didn't know that.
So then the next ride, he's doing them parallel, and he just fucking barrels down the hill.
And I think, uh-oh, he's going a little too fast.
This is worrying.
And then I just see him put his hands up like, say, the cops pointed a gun at you, that kind of hands up in the air.
And he's going, woo!
With his little lizard mask on, just barreling down the hill.
So much better and faster than you.
Ouch.
But he was very good.
It was stunning how we'd go on like a blue square.
And he was like, oh man, we have, uh, we got a kid here.
Didn't matter.
Yeah.
And there's times when he'd be barreling around a turn and you know, there'd be some, he'd be, he'd be, uh, doing a bit, a bit of a V to turn and, uh, he's hitting some bumps and you just look at his leg and it was vibrating going over the bumps cause he was going so fast.
And I was thinking, dude, you're going to bail.
Take it easy.
But on the way back, we looked up Okimo in the car Wikipedia, and it started in the 50s, scaled up from just a little thing that had those puma things that you put under your crotch.
It's just a one-person thing that pulls you up the hill.
I remember in Canada we had tea bars, and I was 11 years old, and I I don't know why my parents were not really present at a lot of things.
Like, Scottish people, they just let you go.
My mother almost drowned when she was four years old because she fell in a pond.
Where were her parents?
She was rescued by some guy walking by.
Why was my four-year-old mother swimming in a pond probably about a mile from her house?
Like, I wouldn't let my seven-year-old out of my sight.
Anyway, um...
But yeah, we used to wander around the Bronx as kids, and imagine doing that?
Letting your kid walk around the Bronx until nighttime?
Yeah, you can't do that.
If I let my three kids out the front door and locked the door, and came by like an hour later, they'd be standing on the front porch.
The kids no longer have it in them.
We've removed that gene.
And I feel like the world's less dangerous than it was in the 90s.
Way more surveillance.
And that's why you have this obesity epidemic.
Because we're so fucking paranoid that we keep them indoors, feed them snacks, and they play Fortnite.
For eight hours at a time.
The activity change definitely contributes to... And it's really bad for the economy, because they're not getting their adventure glands developed, you know?
They're not getting into trouble, they're not getting into mischief.
Oh, that's another thing we used to do, is just go through the forest on skis.
You just make a sharp left and just go through the trees.
That's great!
There's a place like that called Platkill that's about three hours from here.
Oh, Platikill.
There's a Platikill?
With an E?
Platikill?
Yeah, yeah, that's close to me.
That was started by two ski instructors in the early 90s.
It went bankrupt, the hill.
They had a bad year.
Just like Okimo.
Okimo was started in the 50s.
They had the Puma lift.
I didn't finish my T-Bar story.
So the T-Bar flew out from underneath my ass, and then it's a T. It swung back like an upside-down pickaxe and knocked out my front teeth.
And I'm lying there crying with blood shooting out of my mouth.
So there's blood all over the snow.
It's extra gory, right?
Because it's white.
And because I'm white.
And people are coming by in the T-bar and going, are you okay?
Are you okay?
But they don't want to fuck up their ride.
So they just went by.
I swear, I'll never forget this.
It was, what, 40 years, 35 years ago.
I remember about 10 different couples just going, are you okay?
Well, I asked him if he's okay.
I'm not gonna fuck up my ride.
Or maybe that's the way it was in the early 80s.
People just didn't have feelings.
Eventually, one of the guys with the X on her back picks me up and takes me down and fucking puts my teeth back in or whatever they do.
Wow.
Okimo started in the 50s, it had just the Puma thing, and then in the 60s it had a chairlift.
In the 70s it had flooding and shitty snow and they didn't invest any money in snow machines and it went bankrupt.
That's one bad year that does it, right?
I don't know.
Maybe it was more than one.
But then it was bought, after it went bankrupt, and this couple souped it up.
I think they're called Muellers.
They souped it up and built it up into the number one ski hill for families, according to Parenting Magazine.
And I think they sold it to a massive conglomerate recently that owns all the hills.
Did you know that the fucking New York State owns ski hills in New York?
New York State owns ski hills?
The government.
Cuomo.
The government owns two ski hills.
Peak Resorts and Bel-Air.
Bel-Air?
Oh, Bel-Air.
Yeah, I know Bel-Air.
Last year, taxpayers spent $9.1 million on those hills.
They took it out of our money.
The hills should be free then!
And they built a gondola and they souped up the fucking place where everyone drinks.
Wow.
There's no loss of profit there, it's just all profit.
And how do other ski hills compete when you're up against the government?
It's infuriating.
Wow, that is crazy.
That's like McDonald's stomping out like a mom and pop store or something.
This is what all you have to know about New York.
Watch Gangs of New York.
That's New York today.
Boss Tweed is Cuomo is Bill de Blasio.
The corruption is deep.
All the cops have to bust their ass for their money, but their pensions are still insane.
120 grand a year for 40 years.
FDNY insane.
The guys who take your tickets, they have a five hour break in the middle of the day where they hang out at Grand Central in these little cots.
I mean, the MTA.
They have just a giant bank account with like 700 million dollars in it, and they keep saying, we need more money, we have to fix the L train.
They could not raise the price of a subway for seven years using that money, but no, they just hoard it.
Look at the, you know the tolls?
Robert Moses designed those tolls where the money is counted and processed underground, underneath where they take it, so they get to decide how much they Siphon and how much they give to the bank.
It's this this state is deeply corrupt Here's a game.
I did once Go to Albany right not the town, but the the political staff there look up any single politician's name in Albany anyone at all put it in quotes and then put the word controversy next to it and I Totally guarantee you will have some embezzling some corruption scandal on every single politician there Any hizzle.
So, they go bankrupt in the 70s, they get bought, and now they're awesome.
And that, that, so that was like a quarter century.
Those small-town local businessmen in Okemo, what's the town around there, Ludlow?
Ludlow, uh, is it?
Vermont.
Vermont.
Ludlow, Vermont.
These local businessmen bust their ass, they have kids, you know, their kids' entire life is owning Okemo.
They kept the name.
And then they're done, bankrupt, no legacy.
Now it's this massive hill, and people, the attitude with the average American, the average leftist, the average social democrat is, fucking rich white people owning this Okimo, dining out, just getting millions upon millions.
Yes, the people who own Okimo, well the corporation who owns Okimo now is doing well.
But every time you see a success, there is a mountain of failure behind it.
My estimate is, for entrepreneurs, one out of every 12 attempts Look at Van's shoes!
Van's shoes is successful now.
Where are these people?
They busted their ass. - Yeah. - For every rich person who owns an Okemo, there's 11 broke people who tried and failed and have nothing to show for it.
Look at Vans Shoes.
Vans Shoes is successful now.
There's only one guy from Vans with the name Van in it working there.
The rest all sold their shares 'cause they were going bankrupt.
And he is the head of, like, events.
He makes probably, like, 200 grand a year or something.
He owns no stock.
Wow.
So Vans, one of the biggest shoe companies in the world, no Vans people get any Vans money.
They have one Vans employee.
The name Vans comes from Van, comes from the original founders.
Or this place, Platykill.
It also went bankrupt.
It went bankrupt in the early 90s.
Two ski instructors got a bunch of small business loans, found a bunch of rich families, and they bought it.
And they busted their ass.
And this guy, Vatjay, Laszlo Vatjay, sounds Indian, but he's white.
His thing was, we're not going bankrupt.
We're never going under.
So they rent it out in the summer to camping.
They have mountain biking there.
And then recently they do this thing where you can rent the entire mountain for four grand.
Wow.
That's not even that bad, is it?
No, it's not, dude.
Wow.
You just need a hundred people and that's 40 bucks each.
Wow.
And you own the hill, you own the lodge, you own everything.
That's awesome.
We could get a hundred people together, could we not?
Uh, yeah.
But I just thought, you know, reading about Okemo and Plattakill and seeing these horrible government-owned resorts, I just thought, ski hills are a great example of the lack of respect we have for entrepreneurs.
That Jose Alcoff guy where he's like, every rich person, kill them.
Yeah, but they weren't rich all the time, like a lot of it's like success stories.
Or there was that liberal author there, Jewish woman who, what the hell is her name?
She said, no one who has a million dollars earned it ethically.
There's no way you can earn a million and still be a moral person.
You're like, what about the biochemists that are sequencing DNA to cure cancer?
Who are they taking advantage of?
They don't have little kids building cell phones in China.
They're just in the lab all day curing cancer.
How about a thank you?
Yeah, a lot of that money's earned.
I mean, they should, honestly, what they should be talking about is YouTubers, like the paradox of value of entertainment, people that get paid for entertainment compared to people that keep the world running.
Yeah, but it is hard to entertain.
Jimmy Kimmel is a uniquely talented person, but actors don't deserve any money.
I don't know why famous people exist.
There's a demand for it, which is weird.
I don't understand the demand.
I don't want, like you look at Tom Hanks in Castaway and half of your brain, the whole movie is going, oh that's Tom Hanks, he has a house in Beverly Hills, he's been married to his wife for a long time.
He's doing a good job.
I saw a picture of him in People Magazine going to get a coffee.
He's not abandoned on a desert island.
Every good scene you're like, wow he's nailing it.
He's nailing, faking this.
It keeps like a third of your brain in the making of the movie.
You're like, oh, that's good production.
Oh, they got lighting great in that.
And you can't leave because you recognize the guy.
Why don't they just have, acting is the easiest thing in the world.
If you fuck up the line, the director says, no, let's try it again.
And you have infinite chances to get the line right.
You don't even have to memorize it.
When we did How to Be a Man, I wouldn't memorize my lines because I usually have them by the third take.
So I'd learn it on the set.
It was a little arduous for the director, but that's not my problem.
It's like when people say, don't drink when you're getting a tattoo because it makes your blood thin, and that's harder for the tattooist.
Yeah, postmen work in the rain.
You can work with some runny blood, dude.
It's not my problem.
Sorry.
It's like when people put their crumpled up tissues on the plate and desecrate the meal they just made.
Like, you might as well put your cigarette out in a fish eye.
I just learned this.
I always say, don't do that.
And they go, it's easier for the waiter.
I go, people work in sewers.
You don't need to make it easier for the waiter.
I don't want to see a pile of garbage in a plate that I just ate in.
It doesn't necessarily make it easy for the busboy or waiter, by the way.
Yeah, it saves him what, a second?
Well, and then, and then when you, when you're actually washing dishes, you have to, like, scrape that off, and if there's a fucking fork on there, then you have to, like, fish that, you have to fish out the garbage from the keepables.
Like, if there's a spoon and a fork on there, you're like, oh shit, I just threw away a spoon and a fork, because there's garbage in the goddamn thing.
You just taught me that.
I totally agree, and it's like desecrating your meal.
It's like, uh...
Yeah, it's like you said, well, like putting a cigarette out on a fish eye.
That's an example I always use because every time I bring it up with people, they think it's insane.
I learned it from a professional chef girlfriend I had, and my wife thinks it's an affectation that I've clung to, but it's, you have to have some, this goes back to this whole thing about respect.
Can we have some reverence, please?
You have so much reverence for myths, like you carry around water everywhere and you have a helmet on your head, but you don't have any reverence for real things like entrepreneurs.
Like men.
I think that this helmet thing, it's emasculating.
It's emasculating to see a dad with his helmet on because he's scared of bonking his noggin.
He looks like such a cuck.
You look like such a pussy as a grown man.
You're supposed to be running a family.
I don't wear a seatbelt, by the way.
That's another.
I noticed that.
Uh, you're, you're a man, you're running a family and you're petrified of bonking your head on a tree.
That doesn't look masculine.
This is another thing that's going on with, with the, all this hysteria around safety and, and you know, not letting the kids play is there's a real fear of male sexuality.
For example, basketball shorts.
I'm watching basketball the other day and they're wearing frocks.
Their shorts are so huge that they look like Amish dresses on their legs, like they flow in the breeze.
Yeah.
And it's a fear of, of homosexuality really is what it comes down to.
In the, I know this is a stretch, so hear me out.
In the eighties, we would wear short shorts.
Now I would argue maybe the eighties was a little too sexual for men because we would be little kids.
And we'd think we were sexy, like we'd be nine and we'd be posing with feathered hair and we'd have muscle tees where you could see our abs and we'd be posing super sexy in photos because we're super hot and we love chicks.
So little kids should not be sexy.
They should not be posing in a hot way.
You need pubes to pose in a sexual way.
So, okay, the eighties overdid it.
But by the time we were teenagers, We like, we thought we were hot and we'd have feathered hair.
We'd have short shorts on with our, they were so short that the pockets could be seen coming out the bottom and you'd be showing off your bulge.
And then you'd have like a leather wristband that was just there to be hot.
And you were like, when you would go to pick up a chick, it wasn't like, can I please be with you?
You're like, Hey, you want some of this?
Yeah.
I'm S I'm a sexy teen.
What's up?
Let's go for a ride in my parents' car.
And then you cut to today and it's all like, I'm not gay, I'm not sexual, I'm wearing a gown on my legs, I don't want you to see my legs.
Why not?
Men's legs are one of the sexiest things about them.
You should see my legs.
They look like Superman's.
I have the exact... I'm not bananas about my upper body, but my lower body could be in Marvel comics.
And that includes my cock.
Yeah, you know, it's like that baggy clothes trend started with the JNCO jeans and then like the baggy shorts like hip-hop culture is all baggy and stuff like that.
Yeah, I think that's... It's to obscure the male form, perhaps.
Well, I think the origin of baggy jeans was...
Was prison.
Because you'd have those oversized uniforms that were oversized because it's cheaper just to make it too big.
But I think that the long shorts going below your knees is like, I'm not a fag.
I'm no fag.
Look at, these are long.
I'm not, I don't think I'm sexy.
That absolutely is what people think too, because if you wear, I have a pair of shorts And they come up above the knee, and I get comments on it the whole day.
And they just fit well.
You can send them to me, because I spoke to the leaders of the gay community, and I said, we want to take short shorts back.
And they said, fine.
I don't even like them anymore.
And they were available.
It was just like a ski hill.
They were going into foreclosure in the gay community, and I bought them for next to nothing.
That's not bad.
Oh, I'm going to wear them then, if you don't mind.
I'm just going to keep them.
Yes, wear them.
Show off your bulge.
They're salmon colored, though.
It looks like you have no pants on.
I'm not salmon-skinned.
I'm salmon-appetited.
Yeah, you're yellow.
Yes.
You know, two other examples of this emasculating going on.
One, I've noticed these men who are bald, especially if they're on TV and they're political pundits, they all have to have had their head shaved that day.
It's bald shaming, is what it is.
And when I was young, yes, there was toupees and stuff and wigs, but there was also a large contingent of bald men that were just like, I'm fucking bald, yeah?
What are you gonna do about it?
They weren't ashamed of themselves.
And you look at that guy on Mary Tyler Moore, the show, and he, bald guys when I was a kid would grow out the sides a bit.
And they'd just go, yeah, I was a seven, then I went bald, now I'm a six.
I'm only one point down, big fucking deal.
I'm already married anyway.
And they were proud of it.
But today, there's so much shame.
In being bald, that you look at anyone on Fox News or CNN and you can see like the razor stubble from that morning.
A hundred percent of them are completely fucking bald because they're so ashamed of themselves.
And it's, it's more anti-masculine.
Same with manscaping and having to shave your chest and trying to have abs.
You know, you be proud of yourself.
My final example of this demasculating, emasculating culture is when professional ball players, or yeah, football, basketball, baseball, when they're forced to wear pink to raise awareness for breast cancer.
If you don't know about breast cancer, you are a child, or you're a mental patient, or you have an IQ below 60 and we can't help you anyway.
You're a vegetable.
Terry Shivo, basically.
You're on a feeding tube.
Who the fuck doesn't know about breast cancer?
And what are you raising awareness for?
It's doing great.
Even By the way, as a side note, even these stupid marathons and shit where you raise $10,000 and, I did a walk for breast cancer.
It's a multi-trillion dollar industry.
It doesn't need your $10,000.
It's not going broke.
Everyone wants to cure it because it kills something like 40,000 women a year.
We're all on the same page with breast cancer and the way they do it up too, it seems like it's a It's like, it's sort of like hate has no home here signs, where they're basically calling you a racist and they're virtue signaling.
Yeah, they hold them hostage.
I'm better than you.
They hold the players hostage.
Yeah.
And they go, what are you not going to wear this?
You should put this sign on your lawn or you're racist.
It's like when people call white people racist, they say, how high?
Like they immediately won't start jumping around.
It's like, it's sort of like in the old Westerns where they shoot at the other guy's feet to make them dance.
They shoot the allegation racist at white people to make them do a little dance.
And they love doing that dance.
But I feel like with the ballplayers, it's also like a little, yeah, go put on your pink.
Like I saw this catcher once, I think it was the Mets, and I forget his name, but you should have seen the elaborate pink costume they forced him to wear.
Fluorescent pink on his chest plate thingy, his glove, his socks, his shoes, his hat had all these pink accents.
They were basically dressing him up in drag.
And I couldn't help but think it was, there was some malicious intent there.
Yeah.
It was kind of a, fuck you, like, look what I did.
Hey, big, strong, uh, sorry to cut you off.
Yeah, but hey, big, strong, uh, athlete guy who's the symbol of masculine, like peak masculinity.
And it's also interesting that they attack baseball too.
And the Mets, because you think of the 80s Mets, and it's nails, and it's cocaine, and it's cigarettes, and it's guys doing coke in between innings, and getting drunk, and getting arrested for gambling.
It was a real man's game where that guy, who's that guy who says, I shit my pants last night?
I know who you're talking about.
The guy, the Pintar guy.
What the hell's his name?
He's the best guy ever.
He is George Brett.
George Brett.
George Brett is the quintessential man.
Like a guy who goes up to you while you're stretching and goes, shit my pants last night.
Can't wait to tell you.
I'm good for those about once a year.
What about you guys?
You said that in the thing, I'm good for those?
That is a real man.
You can count on me to do that about once a year.
Yeah.
And then the bitches, and I'm not saying they're male or female, um, they want to come up and they go, yeah, let's humiliate him.
Let's, let's humiliate Travis Darno.
That's who it was.
Darno.
Let's humiliate Darno and get him in a little pink costume.
And it's all tied in together here, folks.
This anti-entrepreneur stuff, this lack of rums for the entrepreneur is actually anti-male.
And this dressing up Travis Darnot in a little pink costume isn't about breast cancer.
It's about humiliation.
And convincing all these men that they need helmets or they're going to bonk their noggin and making them scared of their own shadow is all about demasculinizing?
What's the word?
I think emasculate.
Emasculating them, yeah.
It's all about emasculating them.
And I was talking to Anthony Comey about this the other day and I said, we were talking about GM.
They were the first corporation to hire a female CEO and a female CFO.
And they are going bankrupt.
They lost 400,000 jobs, I believe, and promptly had to shut down the Chevy Volt.
They're not manufacturing that anymore.
By the way, this is after Trump brought it to America.
Trump brings it to America, we give it to two chicks to handle, and it promptly goes under.
That is a huge... I mean, they did pretty good for a long time, that GM.
Yeah, they did.
Obama bailed them out, right?
And then we give it over to chicks.
Oh boy.
And I'm sorry, chicks, but you tend, there's exceptions.
Barbara Corcoran is amazing.
Maggie Thatcher was the best prime minister Britain ever had.
But for the most part, they're too agreeable in the workforce and they're too sensitive.
Like fucking Gretchen Carlson, whoever it was, getting $20 million because Roger Ailes said, if you would have slept with me, you'd be doing way better here.
Is that- you deserve 20 million dollars?
You know how many times homos have said that to me when I worked in advertising?
All the time.
You know, if you would let me suck you off, you could have this contract.
You know what I do when someone says that to me in the workforce?
I go, well, I guess we won't be having that contract then.
And I could easily go out for beers with that guy and go, you crazy homo.
You're never going to blow me.
Let's drop it.
I can take it.
The last thing that would occur to me would be to sue some homo for hitting on me in the workplace.
You know, there was a water park.
Where a kid was decapitated and his parents got 20 million.
So having your child decapitated is as bad as Roger Ailes hitting on you, according to this economy.
So I was saying to Kumi, I go, he goes, I tell him that and he goes, when are they going to realize that men and women are different?
And I said to him, they know men and women are different.
They think women are better.
And it reminded me of this tweet from George Takei.
Oh my.
Another gay Asian.
Oh, how dare you?
I am not Asian.
This is George Takei.
Oh my.
That's like when people call me a racist, transphobic, Islamophobe.
I go, I'm not racist.
Yeah.
At this point people, I can't do a very good George Takei.
Oh my.
Do you have the transcript?
Yeah.
I can read it.
At this point, people should stop asking whether they would ever vote for a woman.
Men so far have led the world to the brink of ruination.
- I can't stop asking whether they would ever vote for a woman.
Men so far have led the world to the brink of ruination and into more-- - Ruination. - More nation and into more wars and conflicts At this point, people really should be asking whether they should vote for another man.
Oh my.
Oh my.
He's such a, like a fucking velvety weirdo.
I hate that argument too.
He's a creep.
It's like, yeah, white men were Nazis.
Men also wiped out the Nazis.
Yeah, great point.
And men started slavery.
Men ended slavery.
We just did a lot of shit.
When you're doing a lot of stuff, you're going to be doing good and bad stuff.
Sid, you remember when we were watching Ballad of Buster Scruggs?
Yes.
And then there's the Tom Waits part where he's gold, he's gold digging, digging for gold.
Yeah.
And it's like, he's 50 to 60 years old.
And, uh, that is the, that is the archetype of the, of the prospector in the wild west and old guy.
And then that you have to dig.
You have to hunch your back over and fuck it.
Could you ever picture a woman of that age or even like a 30 year old woman doing that?
Men back then would just go like 15 states over and just start a new job.
They would start a new career.
We had grit and we had mobility back then.
And I think this anti-entrepreneur thing and this obsession with safety is linked to a hatred of men.
And they think women are better, and they want... Mark Ruffalo!
Okay, you know this fake controversy with Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, where there's some video that surfaced of her dancing when she was in college?
I think one Twitter person said, this is gay, Or lame or something.
And then it became, Republicans can't handle that Cortez used to dance.
And then she fights back at this nonexistent controversy by doing an updated dancing video.
I'll dance if I want to, Republicans.
No one gives a shit that you danced in college.
Are you serious?
So, Mark Ruffalo is celebrating her comeback at all the people who hate that she once danced.
I have deuce chills.
I know.
Do they think this is Footloose?
They've turned us into the Grinch.
I'm going to celebrate Christmas, Republicans.
Actually, it's Republicans that have to celebrate Christmas with a vengeance.
But Mark Ruffalo goes, looking forward to watching AOC dance all over her critics and the GOP these next two years.
And then he has a dancing symbol.
This is Mark Ruffalo, by the way, who said, waving goodbye to the patriarchy before the midterms, and in his hand was a white handkerchief.
That is the universal symbol of surrender.
And we have a culture now that is enthusiastically surrendering itself to the matriarchy.
Guys, we had a matriarchy before.
Pre-Christianity.
It was called paganism.
You know what they did?
They threw babies in fires and sacrificed them to the gods.
They sacrificed virgins to the gods.
They were not sweeties.
I'm sorry.
It's not all gonna be peaches and cream.
I was also going to briefly mention Great Wolf Lodge, which is this incredible chain of water parks that I always go to with the family and just look around in awe of the hard work that went in.
It was started by two brothers in Madison, Wisconsin, who had had a bunch of failures at restaurants and stuff.
They eventually made a pretty good water park.
It was bought a few years later.
And then these other two guys, Forget their names.
Bruce Naviseer and Mark Baccaro bought it and poured money into it.
Oh, that's the other thing about Platykil, too.
They took all their profits and they poured them in to the business.
So one of the reasons Platykil has such great snow all the time is that they always took their profits and invested it in new snow grooming machines.
Mmm, and that's what these guys did with Great Wolf Lodge They kept taking the money and making more chains and better and they're incredible quality you these I don't know how they afford the insurance but you are going and take a football field and Fold it into a cone and that is what you're going into in this one thing where you you go down the edges so hard that you come up and you think you're gonna fall flat on your face like it's it's a quarter mile of Height, it's amazing.
Damn and so fucking fun and You know men built that And we just can't wait to give the reins to the female CFO of GM.
You know what I find funny?
That we're on the lift together, and you look down there at the guys working on the... They're building, like, I guess... They're building a half-pipe for snowboarders.
And they got a big snow bulldozer, the equivalent of that, and there's one guy just smoking a cigarette, and you're like, you're just sitting there, I think I want to start smoking cigarettes.
Like, it looks cool.
It was a good commercial for smoking.
It was.
I noticed that too.
Your head darted off and I was like, I wonder what that was about.
Didn't ask you.
And later on you're like, you know what?
Smoking's not all so bad, huh?
You better not start smoking at fucking your age.
No, look, let's clarify something here.
We're obviously not saying women don't belong in the workforce.
Women are incapable.
The problem is when you put them there because they're women and not for any other reason.
If women were great, better than men at construction, no one has a problem with them working construction.
It's when they're there to fill some sort of quota.
And you look at the Cortez in the house now, taking selfies of her with the first Muslim senator and the first black attorney general.
This first woman that and this first visible minority this and the first Palestinian we have a Palestinian who clearly hates Trump because he loves Israel saying I'm gonna impeach that motherfucker and Cortez you're going I got your back Trump's a racist she said a last night on 60 minutes Trump is a racist you're a fucking teenager you sound like me when I had leopard skin hair in high school And I thought her taking selfies is just such a perfect example of that, those midterms.
It had nothing to do with policy.
No one can name any of their policies.
In fact, no one can name any DNC policy.
I guess they want universal healthcare though.
They seem to not talk about it much.
Their only policy is impeach Trump.
And the next election, the only policy is going to be we, America's become racist.
Hate clearly has no home here.
So let's get rid of Trump because he's the one who made it racist.
That is imbecilic, if that's a term.
That is just so stupid, and anyone who's walked outside knows it's not true.
Yeah, but hate crimes are on the rise.
No, they're not.
Hate crime hoaxes are on the rise.
Yeah, but have you seen the Southern Poverty Law Center's hate map?
Yeah, I have.
It's ridiculous.
It doesn't make any sense.
Go outside.
You know what?
Start telling people you're a white nationalist.
Start telling people that you want blacks to go back to Africa and you think Jews control everything.
See how popular you are.
See how many people go, yeah, me too, that's cool.
You're going to become a pariah.
If it was normal, then it wouldn't be the end of your career to be accused of it.
Ever think of that minor detail?
Anyway.
Truth.
That's enough truth bombs for one bathtub.
No, everything is linked here though.
And I remember, it's an unfortunate person to reference as a pro-lifer, but I remember Margaret Sanger.
Said she would just walk outside sometimes and look at these incredible machines men built.
And that's what we should be doing when we walk down the street and we see these buildings.
Have some reverence.
Yes, they're mostly made by men.
So what?
Revere their creations, revere the risks they took and stop being such a pussy with your water bottle and your helmet.
Can we get back to the 80s, please?
That's what really what, uh, everyone says that I want to go back to some sort of Victorian era of Women in the Kitchen.
No, Make America Great Again doesn't mean the 1800s.
It means 1984.
Oh, wait, that's a bad year.
Orwell ruined that one.
It means 1983.
Right before that.
Pre-Orwell.
Is that what he wrote that book, 1984?
He pounded it out really fast.
Yeah, right?
That's funny.
Oh, that's funny.
I think it was the 50s.
No, we just want to go back to the 80s.
We want to go back to jet skis and mullets and wraparound shades and kids playing outside, kids skinning their knee and not going to the doctor, no one needing a bottle of water in their purse, no one needing to wear a helmet, and respecting people who were rich.
You know, in the 80s you saw someone in a Corvette or a Lamborghini or something and you went, whoa, that dude's got a lot of money, awesome.
Now it's seen as gauche.
Now you have rich people puttering around in a Prius because they're so ashamed of their wealth.
That's not what America's based on.
It's based on whoever's good, whoever's good enough gets to the top.
Yes, that can mean hundreds of millions.
And by the way, one other thing too, Cortez wants people above 10 million to be taxed.
So does Ann Coulter.
I saw that, yeah.
Everyone thinks that's new.
I remember her and Lou Dobbs in the green room at Fox arguing about that.
And he said, I can't believe Ann Coulter is asking for new tax.
That was like six years ago.
And she appeared on a show after to discuss it.
But she's always been for taxes for the very, very rich.
No one's against that, you dumbasses.
If the media was equally, it was like fair, across the board they'd be like, Ocasio-Cortez parrots Ann Coulter's financial ideas.
