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Dec. 6, 2017 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes

01:30:29

Get Off My Lawn Podcast #3 | I Screwed Up

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	I screwed up.
	I screwed up really bad.
	And it happened on Wednesday.
	It's still plaguing me.
	I can't get over it.
	That was the beginning of last week's episode.
	I can't get over it.
	So, I knew this girl, Chelsea Skidmore.
	And she worked for me.
	After I left Vice, I used to do do's and don'ts at Vice.
	I left it and they took the name, so I just called it Street Boners.
	Because a boner can be a positive thing and it can mean a gaffe.
	So I called them street boners and I didn't make them, I just rated them kitten heads.
	Zero to ten kitten heads.
	It didn't take.
	I did a book of it.
	It didn't sell.
	So I gave up on that.
	The free market wasn't interested in my boners.
	But she took them.
	And we got along great.
	And she was a sexy broad.
	So there was flirtatious jokes.
	I never horsed around with her.
	Obviously, I'm married.
	But I had her on my show, on Anthony's show.
	I had her on Compound Media, the Gavin McInnes Show, one of the first episodes.
	And I interviewed her in Anthony's hot tub wearing a bikini.
	So when I saw her on Instagram saying, F you Harvey Weinstein, with her fingers up, I texted her.
	I don't even remember how I saw her on Instagram.
	I think she liked one of my pictures and I was doing that drunk thing where you check out people who like you.
	It's a pathetic thing to do, really.
	It means that you should get off your phone.
	But I saw that picture and I messaged her and I go, whoa, what happened?
	What happened with you and Weinstein?
	And she goes, five separate times, he masturbated in front of me.
	And so I delicately said, can you come on my show?
	And she goes, I don't know.
	I said, please, please, please.
	Look, we'll do it your way.
	I mean, I won't be exploitative.
	She goes, yeah, I just...
	And then, actually no, I didn't say that initially.
	I said, my first idea was what I pitched to Lauren Savant.
	Lauren Savant was the one who went on Huffington Post, I think it was.
	I can't remember where.
	She was also on a bunch of daily shows.
	News shows.
	She's a news lady.
	She used to work at Fox News.
	I know her very well.
	Set her up on dates.
	I think she's the catch of the century.
	And as a married man, when you know a beautiful, smart woman, you don't want to have sex with her, your first thing is, we gotta get you married!
	We gotta get you breeding!
	You're good for humankind!
	So let's get you a guy!
	So, I'm always trying to hook her up with guys.
	That's how I feel about roaming millennial and all these chicks.
	And it works too.
	In fact, my biggest thing with Chelsea was, we got to get you married.
	And she kept, I was looking at our old texts and she would say things like, I want Leslie Arfin's career.
	I want to get into comedy and I need this break and that break.
	And I said to her, I was reading my texts and it said, why are you so into your career?
	Why are you so obsessed with your comedy career?
	It's not in your blood.
	I don't think I said that part.
	So you need a man, you need to get married.
	So as I checked in with her this week, after at least a year, Uh, she said, I'm engaged to this guy.
	I look him up, total hunk.
	I'm very happy about it.
	And, uh, so I said to her, let's do a thing that I want to do with Lauren Savant where we, I blame you.
	And I say, I take the Donna Karan route and I say, you are clearly asking for it.
	Look, let's not play dumb.
	We've all seen Harvey Weinstein.
	You wanted him to masturbate in front of you.
	Of course you did.
	You wanted to see his weird slacks at his knees, and his belt sort of bouncing, clinking.
	And you wanted to see his long shirt untucked, hanging down over his tiny genitalia.
	And you wanted to see his sweaty, pervy, corporate brow, uh, dripping.
	You wanted to hear him grunting, like all women do!
	Because that's a funny take, don't you think?
	Clearly, it's almost not funny because it's so obvious, right?
	It's too big of a joke.
	And she says, absolutely not.
	I don't want to do that.
	I want to take it serious.
	Okay, fine.
	So I get her on the show on Wednesday.
	And I show... I open the show with a picture of her and I in the hot tub from when she was on my previous show.
	And the dialogue back then on my old show was horrific.
	Like, if you just dip your ear into any one of my old shows, it makes the worst porno seem like a church seminar.
	I mean, every single minute was pure raunch.
	It was like, it was like the worst Howard Stern gets 100% of the time.
	So, we were talking about disgusting stuff, I won't even repeat.
	And she goes, I'm not doing this.
	And then she closes her computer, meaning she ends the Skype call.
	And as I saw, you know, you get this perspective as the camera shuts down, you sort of see like the room all blurry.
	And then you see the keyboard for a nanosecond and you go, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
	And then I start texting her.
	We're not going to do that.
	I'm sorry.
	We're taking that out.
	We're taking that out.
	And she goes, that was rude.
	That's exactly what I said I didn't want to do.
	Goodbye.
	Then, bloop bloop, she goes offline on Skype, and I am apoplectic.
	I swear, I punch the wall, I kick my foot through a box in the hallway, I text her 900 times, sort of like what I would imagine Harvey Weinstein would do.
	I even go, I find her fiance on Instagram, I go to his site, and I write him this big long heart bleeding email saying, please look, we'll do it your way, like a bitch, and it didn't work, and she's gone.
	It would have been such a perfect episode.
	I didn't talk about it on the show because you don't want to tune into a show and say, Hi, we almost had Donald Trump come on the show, but we did not get him.
	So we're going to have an impersonator come on.
	You don't want to hear about how this show isn't as good as it could have been.
	But man, it could have been good.
	And that was the same episode I had Scott Adams on, John Lott.
	And I have no friends in show business anymore because of Trump.
	So she's the only one I know.
	She's like a comedian chick.
	She's the only one I know.
	And talk about a quality of guest.
	This is on the front page of the New York Post all week.
	Harv Nadeau.
	Weinstein screwed up again.
	What a disgusting perf.
	I believe those were the top three headlines.
	And I think, like this could be on Hannity.
	Woman was accosted by Harvey Weinstein five separate times.
	Ugh!
	I'm actually re-getting mad about it.
	It's one of those things where you get over it, and this was three days ago, I can feel myself getting over it.
	It's like a relationship.
	I say to girls, you know, you date him for three years, say you're 29, it's gonna take you a year and a half to get over him.
	Because it takes, relationships take 50% of the time of the relationship to move on.
	Something big like a betrayal of someone if someone takes your patent or something and some guy you started You know you invented something with that's gonna take the same amount of time so say you spend three years Developing software for some website and some guy takes it from you.
	You're gonna be mad for three years relationships 50% of the time Losing a good guest not long at all three days.
	We're on the third day.
	I'm getting over it, but man It would have been good But she was scared.
	I was going to say, you're a slut.
	And let me defend myself briefly here.
	The reason I took that crazy angle and the reason I showed her in the hot tub was obviously not to frame her, not to ambush her.
	I want what's best for Chelsea.
	Always have.
	But I didn't want to be a hypocrite.
	And I think a lot of the people on the right are so happy to have this kill, this fresh kill, that we jump in and we just start diving into the cadaver.
	And it is delicious.
	It is delicious watching the left implode.
	It is delicious tasting their hypocrisy.
	But it's gonna bite you in the ass if you pretend that everything remotely sexual or flirtatious is evil.
	I'm not defending Harvey Weinstein, obviously.
	But what I wanted to say with Chelsea was, I've been flirtatious with you, I've been inappropriate, made rude jokes, because you're a pretty girl, and you're aware of that, but there's a line that is crystal clear as your employer, and I can see it clear as day, and I don't go over it.
	And Donald Trump in the bus, And by the way, they're already using this against us.
	Sean King was saying, you know, Harvey Weinstein, everything bad about him?
	That's in the White House right now.
	And he was talking about the grab the pussy thing in the bus.
	The bus is a great example of the line.
	He was joking.
	He was saying, they let you do it.
	Consent, major part of it.
	Obviously.
	And then he also talked about crossing the line, and he said, I went to a furniture store, I bought her a bunch of furniture, I was a complete, I believe he called himself a faggot.
	And it didn't work, and she dumped me, and then I went, oh well, and gave up.
	I didn't accost her.
	That's what Trump was saying.
	Even in his most raunchy, jokey, private conversation, he's describing consent, because that's what men want at the end of the day.
	Men are not rapists.
	Men don't enjoy that.
	When men find out someone raped, they want to throw them in jail.
	When they find out that it's someone they know, they want to go and kill the guy.
	Which, as Crowder pointed out, why are there- where are the boyfriends and the husbands?
	I'll tell you where the boyfriends and the husbands are.
	The victims of Harvey Weinstein's husbands and boyfriends have been held down on the couch and told to stay there.
	You know, Leslie Arfin told me a story about her in the workplace getting molested, and I'm sort of her dad.
	She's been... I will describe myself as a mentor to her.
	Now, she snatched a pebble from my hand and ran with it, but when she started out, I think I had a lot to do with her getting into writing.
	And, uh...
	When she told me that story, I was like, well, I'm getting on a plane, he's dead.
	And then she begged and pleaded with me, don't, don't, don't, it'll be bad for my career, I'm just gonna drop it, let's move on.
	So I said, okay, for you, I won't go kill him.
	And that's what I think, I mean, we've all heard these stories a million times, and you hear the husband say, she begged and begged and begged for me not to do anything, so I dropped it.
	That's what happens to all these husbands and boyfriends.
	But anyway, Trump talked about consent, and Harvey Weinstein ignored consent.
	So, I don't want to throw the baby out with the bathwater.
	I know of a lot of guys, in fact, in my personal life, 100% of the time, some guy's been accused of sexual assault.
	He's been innocent.
	Harvey Weinstein's not innocent, by the way.
	I want to make that clear.
	Donald Trump was innocent.
	Harvey Weinstein was not.
	Dove Charney at American Apparel, accused.
	Multiple times.
	Totally innocent.
	Know the guy well.
	I wrote an article about it from... I forget what it's called.
	Look it up, Dave.
	Tackymag.com, Dove Charney, Steven Seagal, Terry Richardson.
	Anyway, Terrence, another guy.
	Totally innocent.
	Anthony Cumia, accused of domestic abuse.
	Because a woman lied and said that on her periscope, and her stepmother called the cops, and once the cops are called, they're done.
	Now, the danger here is, if we pretend to be church ladies, and pretend that we're really offended by everything, then we become them.
	And I know it's fun to play dirty pool, and give them a taste of their own medicine, but it's a dangerous game.
	For example, Jimmy Kimmel came out and cried his crocodile tears about the shooting in Vegas, and that picked a fight with the right.
	What are you doing, Dave?
	You're showing me a video.
	I said an article on Tacky Mag.
	Wow.
	It's an article on TheRebel.media.
	Yeah.
	I don't write... It's not an article on TheRebel.media.
	It's a video, and I don't write for TheRebel.media.
	I never have.
	By the way, I'm going to get to Dave in a second because liberals, I'm pro-life and I feel whenever I see someone with Down syndrome, I think liberals are trying to execute you.
	They're trying to end you completely.
	And I, I work with, Dave has Down syndrome and I, as a pro-lifer, I don't want him to die.
	Yes, there it is.
	Sexually charged from Cheney to Seagal.
	So those guys were innocent, Weinstein is not, and we're pretending to be church ladies about a lot of stuff because it's fun, but it's disingenuous and dangerous.
	For example, Jimmy Kimmel came out, cried crocodile tears, and he- everyone's digging through his past, and they're finding things like, he used to do a game on The Man Show, where he'd put something in his pants, like a wrench, and then have girls on the street feel it, and then go, that's a wrench!
	And at one point I think he says, put your mouth on it.
	Uh, that's funny.
	And it's fun to pillory him.
	And give him a taste of his own medicine.
	He's Mr. Morality now.
	And it's fun to show him that he's not.
	But let's not throw the baby out with the bathwater and ban jokes.
	There's another thing that's going around.
	Maybe you can find it, Dave.
	It's Jimmy Kimmel in blackface.
	He's completely brown.
	And he's making fun of some really dumb basketball player.
	Whose name I forget.
	Kamal Marshall or something.
	And he's talking about himself in second person or whatever it is.
	When you say your own name.
	I think it was, yeah, it was Karl Malone, right?
	Karl Malone, yeah.
	Here it is.
	Uh, maybe play a bit of that.
	So he's, he's completely brown in the video and he's talking like Karl Malone and everyone's saying, oh, Mr. Morality, you did a joke in blackface.
	Sometime at night, Carmelo look up in the sky and say, what the hell going on up there?
	The UFO live on another planet?
	Falling in a hole like E.T.?
	Carmelo read on TV about white people getting deducted by aliens, sticking all kind of hell up their butt.
	And that's a damn thing.
	Now, Carmelo never seen no flying saucer himself, but if he do, that's going to be a spooky time.
	See?
	That's really, really funny.
	And when we pretend to be offended by everything just to get revenge, we end up becoming church ladies and banning awesome jokes.
	So let's keep some perspective here.
	Harvey Weinstein.
	Scumbag.
	I might orgasm if I beat him up.
	Terry Richardson, Dove Charney, Anthony Cumia, not scumbags.
	Jimmy Kimmel, annoying when he starts moralizing and becomes just another rich talk show host.
	What is it about being a talk show host that turns you into a douche?
	I know Jimmy Kimmel, awesome guy, hilarious guy, and most importantly, mean guy.
	His jokes are mean.
	He'll, he'll, like, tie your shoelaces together when you're sitting at the table.
	He's a jerk.
	Prankster.
	Pothead.
	And so it doesn't suit his personality to be like this.
	But when we start saying, oh, you dressed up as a brown person and you did a joke, we hate that.
	No, don't do that.
	And that brings me to this whole concept of Weinstein and what is really amazing about this whole controversy is it has inadvertently shown the left that men and women are different.
	And I love when this happens.
	I love the cannibalism of the left.
	I'm gonna do a video about it, actually, where I have summed up the ten things, ten examples of the left cannibalizing themselves, like when you have Black Lives Matter attacking the ACLU.
	How great is that?
	Black Lives Matter hates the ACLU because the ACLU supports free speech, and free speech includes Nazis, so, according to Black Lives Matter, the ACLU is now racist.
	You have them all, the Dadaka Dreamers attacking Nancy Pelosi, who loves them, who sees them as her bread and butter, yet they're attacking her.
	Or you have all these liberal professors getting booted out of their own classrooms for being white, and then suing the school.
	Or you had those students at Berkeley storming out of their class because it's racist to have a test right after the hurricane in Mexico.
	I'm not kidding.
	Can you believe how funny reality is?
	Poor comedians.
	That's why comedians only do jokes about Trump now, because reality is funny enough.
	They stormed out of their classroom because they wanted to take their test home.
	Have you got that footage, Dave?
	Do you know what I'm talking about?
	And they have great quotes like, as she's leaving the room, she goes, y'all can take this test, but people are dying out there.
	Isn't that implicit when you do a test?
	That people on Earth somewhere are dying as you take the test?
	I mean, I think with abortions, I believe there's a death in America every 97 seconds.
	So, people are dying when you take tests.
	That's inevitable when there's 7 billion of us and most of the world sucks.
	But it's fun to see this implosion of the left in the wine scene is a great example of it.
	I'm not just talking about Discovering that Ben Affleck was molesting hosts and being a gross pig.
	I'm talking about the entire concept of molestation.
	For example, you're a dude, and you want a job, and it's going to be 90k a year.
	Again, with Hollywood, you're not going to be Angelina Jolie.
	The ones who make 5 million dollars a movie, there's like 10.
	There's a tiny handful of people making good money in films.
	The vast majority make nothing, and I believe any sane person in Hollywood, they don't expect to get to the Jolie level, but they want to make 90k a year.
	That's considered great.
	Like Rose McGowan, for example.
	Her career.
	She's standing up against Weinstein.
	She's all over the news.
	She's probably made an average of 90k a year.
	So you get offered a job like that.
	I'm talking to you men.
	And it's a gay guy.
	It's your boss.
	And he goes, okay, well, I guess we'll start on Monday.
	Good, all right, great.
	I'll bring my helmet in.
	I'm a foreman for a construction site.
	I'm head of the electrician's union in my county.
	But first, obviously, just suck my balls.
	Pardon me?
	Just sort of tickle my scrotum while I masturbate.
	Uh, no.
	Yes!
	Then he grabs you and you, what do you do?
	You obviously beat him up.
	You don't go, oh, well, here we go.
	It would never occur to you.
	Never!
	That's because you're a dude.
	You're a straight male.
	Actually, I saw James Van Der Beek.
	I think he was on Dawson's Creek.
	He said, a gay man grabbed my ass.
	Yeah, so what?
	Big deal.
	I was only 18.
	Alright, so you either punch him or you laugh it off.
	Gay guys hit on- I live in New York City.
	I always get ogled by homos.
	I actually get mad sometimes.
	If the guy's like a 5, and he's ogling me, I go, are you- I'm way out of your league, dude!
	That's- that's hurtful!
	That you would wink at me.
	Meanwhile, women who breastfeed in public never wink back.
	But you beat them up.
	And then you have all these women and you look at these women and you go, how important is it that you get into Hollywood?
	So I think a lot of us, our first instinct with Gwyneth Paltrow or something is you should have punched him in the face and called the cops.
	Why did you do it?
	Like Asia Argento, in her movie in 1999, I forget what it was called, but she had Joe Coleman play Harvey Weinstein.
	I think his name was Harry in the movie.
	You can find it on Instagram.
	And she shows Harry, Harvey, Saying give me a massage.
	That was his MO by the way He'd say give me a massage, and then he'd either grab them or masturbate or something gross Like they were gonna get into the mood massaging his big giant body his big beanbag chair of a body So he grabbed her and she went through with it and men Don't get that men don't really get rape Because they put themselves in the woman's shoes, and they go I would just beat him up
	And they assume women are as strong as men, and feminism, in a way, trivializes rape.
	Because feminism says women are men, and men would beat up that guy if he did that, so why didn't you beat him up?
	And you go, because it's a woman.
	And they are genetically predisposed to acquiesce.
	They are genetically predisposed to listen to a man and go, well, he's my boss.
	He knows what he's doing.
	I guess I'll do this thing.
	And they also, afterwards, would just go, that was a thing that happened and it's happened before and it's normalized.
	And so they get on.
	Whereas a man, if a man is molested by a gay, it burns him for years and he wants to kill the guy.
	I'm not- now I sound like I'm trivializing rape.
	Obviously, it burns women too, but, you know, if you knew an actor who had to blow a director that was male, and he was a guy, I mean, you'd go, well, are you in an insane asylum?
	It's different for men, obviously.
	For women, it's obviously terrible too.
	They should press charges, but a lot of the times they don't because culturally this molestation is much more normalized with women.
	And that's a bad thing, by the way.
	I don't want it normalized.
	I want Harvey Weinstein, the first time it ever happens, I want the cops called.
	And I'm not talking about rivaled jokes or doing an interview with a woman in a bikini in a hot tub.
	I'm talking about groping, grabbing, illegal acts.
	The Magna Carta thought of this.
	We've got all this written down, like with Mattress Girl.
	That was that woman at Columbia.
	She was having consensual vaginal intercourse.
	It became anal.
	She said, according to her, she said no.
	He continued, she went to the police.
	Now I know cops.
	And the story I got was she went to the police and they saw her sending flirtatious texts to him after the fact.
	And they go, you realize that saying rape when it's not rape is a big, serious crime, right?
	And she left the police and said, I didn't feel safe with the police, so I decided to do it through the school.
	She carried a mattress around, and he ended up suing the school, by the way.
	I believe he won.
	And, uh... Dave, you never found me that clip.
	What happened there?
	I got it.
	Just you went on to the next thing I was waiting for.
	Okay.
	It kills the flow of the podcast, but I'm, I'm cheap, and I hate, the thing about cheap people is they hate being taken advantage of, and part of that is we don't let things go.
	That's why I'm still mad about losing Chelsea as a guest.
	We, we hold on to gripes.
	It's a Scottish thing.
	We'll be mad for centuries.
	Like Milo, when he appeared on Anthony Comey's show, I said, you're dead to me.
	And then about a year later, I go, all right, we can talk again.
	It took me a year to get over that.
	And I don't think Anthony even knew he was doing it.
	Anyway.
	Uh, the Weinstein thing.
	So, well let's just show the clip just for the sake of getting it out of the way.
	I think you'll go to the end.
	Can you just stop?
	Stop.
	Do you know what she's saying right there?
	It's Hispanic students at Berkeley and they're saying, not everyone has a place to sleep, not everyone has a nice happy home with rich parents.
	So, they're not saying that they're that.
	They're just acknowledging that poor people exist.
	So, I don't want to take the test here in class, I want to take it home and do it over the course of maybe two days.
	They're sort of implying that they're homeless people, and they're going to live in a box underneath the bridge, and that's why it's going to take them longer to do the test because they're poor Hispanics.
	Meanwhile, they're at Berkeley.
	Okay, you got some dough.
	You're doing okay.
	And I bet they all do have nice homes to go home to.
	Anyway.
	The Weinstein thing.
	It is an example that women are different.
	Women are weaker than men.
	They're stronger when it comes to a lot of things like endurance and pain.
	They can give birth and stuff like that.
	But physically, they're not as strong as men.
	So they're victims.
	And that is why we have laws.
	That is why we have laws that protect against false allegations, which Mattress Girl ran into.
	And so, In a traditional conservative world, Weinstein's caught a lot quicker because we haven't normalized this concept that men are the same as women.
	We cherish women more.
	We cherish their chastity more.
	To call a woman a slut is different than calling a man a slut.
	That was all the feminists just driving away, leaving this podcast, because they don't agree with me.
	And women don't like that.
	Feminists don't like that.
	They go on slut walks.
	Amber Rose just had a big slut walk, where they walk down the street dressed in ways that titillate me.
	And they have the word slut written on them, which also titillates me.
	And they say, in your face, me!
	We like wearing fishnet stockings and garter belts and having our breasts hanging out.
	And I go, yeah, I know.
	I designed those things.
	Lingerie was designed by men.
	The shapes are male.
	We're the ones who want to emphasize your thighs and buttocks.
	And then you're wearing that to show me what again?
	That being a slut is cool?
	Okay.
	I like boobies.
	The fact that women walk around New York City saying, we're gonna have our tits hang out!
	In your face, literally!
	And you go, yeah, I know.
	I love tits.
	You look amazing.
	And it's totally legal in New York.
	The only problem with it is men are gonna ogle you.
	And that's natural.
	That's the way, I believe, boobies exist, because man started walking upright, and no longer was a butt in your face, so evolution went, we're gonna have to put a butt on our chest, I'm sorry.
	We'll put nipples on it, there's already there, but we need some sort of a butt up here, where the eyes are, or we're not gonna have humans.
	Okay, fine, I'll make a chest butt.
	So, Being a slut is different when you're male and female.
	And Weinstein has exposed that.
	They've exposed that men and women are different.
	Men hear about molestation and their first thought is, why didn't you beat his ass?
	Why didn't your husband beat his ass?
	Why didn't your boyfriend beat his ass?
	Oh, because women are different than men.
	Oh, I get it now.
	I'm shooting the, I'm not shooting, I'm recording this podcast in my home.
	So you're going to hear trucks and dogs and various things.
	My stupid dog that I feel nothing for.
	Nothing.
	I don't dislike my dog.
	I don't like my dog.
	I see it as A piece of garbage.
	I'm sorry.
	I'll never hurt it.
	Don't get me wrong.
	But then I wouldn't hurt a stuffed animal.
	Because I don't have time.
	If he were to die of natural causes, I would feel sad that my kids are gonna be sad.
	But the actual dog itself?
	Nah.
	I could look in its face as it died and just go... Goodbye.
	Anyway.
	You get what I'm saying?
	The Weinstein thing?
	Don't let it make us humorless.
	Don't let it make us unable to tolerate any kind of jokes or flirtation.
	Don't let it make us into liberals in the workplace.
	We should still be able to joke.
	There was a big controversy this week about Barstool Sports.
	Someone leaked their documents and their employment contract.
	And in it, it said, look, we make offensive jokes here.
	Sometimes they'll be sexual.
	Sometimes we do stupid shit.
	Don't sue us because of it.
	And she went, you see?
	Sexism is prevalent.
	And I think the right might want to glom onto that and go, yeah.
	Barstool sports.
	Disgusting.
	Liberals are disgusting perverts.
	No, no, no, no.
	You don't want a world where barstool sports can't make stupid jokes.
	Let's not get on the church lady bandwagon.
	So I read that employment contract and I went, yeah.
	In fact, Dov Charney at American Apparel, after getting sued 50 times for 40 grand each, it adds up.
	And so he had a thing that said, working at American Apparel is a sexually charged environment, you might hear things or see things that you find offensive, uh, don't work here if you don't like that.
	And it wasn't him saying, I get to be- you have to be my sex slave if you work here.
	It was him saying, don't sue me for stupid crap.
	So, that's- I don't want a world where you can't make jokes.
	I think it ends up hurting the people that you purport to help.
	Like a black woman at work now.
	I work by myself with my semi-handicapped producer, but I don't have... I don't have...
	I don't work with a black woman, but I would imagine if you work at somewhere like that's in the office, right?
	The paper place.
	I would imagine that when a black woman walks into the lunchroom, there's sort of a palpable tension.
	Because it's a woman and she's black and we've made so many rules about that and not offending women and black people and blah blah blah.
	Oh my god, if she was handicapped.
	That people go, I don't want to lose my job.
	So I bet you that this culture has turned that person into a pariah.
	And if you're a black woman who loves raunchy humor, which I bet is a disproportionate number of them.
	They can't joke around.
	It's almost like, imagine being a black person, woman at work today, and you probably have to walk in there and go, hey guys, relax, relax, relax.
	Not gonna sue anyone.
	You can joke around.
	You can have fun.
	You know, the Archie Bunker world has more racial diversity.
	The old days of offensive jokes, yes, even racist jokes, is a more multicultural world.
	I think that what happens with With the liberals now is, they would just rather not be around blacks.
	Because they don't want to screw it up.
	And I think that's what's happening in the workforce.
	It ends up isolating them more.
	You know, back when you could make jokes, you could relax.
	And I see this with the working class.
	They're still there.
	They're still making those jokes.
	On a construction site, you still have Puerto Ricans, blacks, and whites all making fun of each other.
	At my old boxing gym, Race, the change room was all race, all the time.
	Race and diet.
	Because they all want to get, they talk like babysitters.
	They all want to lose five pounds for this fight, so they all talk about like, oh I ate ice cubes, and I only ate raisins for two days, and I wore this plastic bag.
	They're always trying to lose weight.
	It's like they have eating disorders.
	But the other thing they always talk about is race.
	One guy sang, there were two black guys, but they were Hispanic.
	And one of them was like, yo, I got that Puerto Rican in me.
	The girls like that.
	They like a bit of Puerto Rican.
	And he goes, well, I got it.
	My brother married a Dominican.
	I got the Dominican in my family.
	Uh, what?
	I didn't say anything, but I felt like going.
	You realize that when your brother marries someone, it doesn't affect your DNA.
	It affects their offspring's DNA.
	You're still whatever race you were before they got married, my friend.
	Then we had this African dude with a huge phallus who would stand there and swing it and punch his chest and go, I am a real man!
	I am a real man!
	Look at this!
	It was funny and fun.
	And it was totally uncensored.
	And the left is creating a world where we censor ourselves.
	It hurts everything.
	It hurts visible minorities, it hurts gays, it hurts women.
	And we're seeing it more and more now.
	And don't fall for it.
	It is fun to mock Weinstein.
	It's fun to mock Jimmy Kimmel.
	But don't start becoming a church lady and saying, I disapprove of all jokes.
	The Man Show was a hilarious show.
	It's hilarious when Kimmel dresses up like that guy.
	And, that basketball player does talk like that.
	So, it's perfect satire.
	He's doing a thing that's totally believable.
	In fact, if you transcribed Kimmel's imitation, and then you wrote down some quotes from, what's his name?
	Kamal Warner?
	You wrote down some- Carl Malone.
	Carl Malone.
	You wrote down quotes from him, you'd see the same thing.
	And Carl Malone's not a victim, okay?
	The guy's very wealthy.
	He's not crying himself to sleep at night.
	And that, in that sense, and that's the moral of today's episode, we're protecting the left from themselves.
	Because they want to create a world where censorship prevails, where the state handles all our problems.
	They're communists, and I think they're genetically communist.
	You know, Jared Taylor is a racist who I disavow, but he believes that everything is genetic.
	not just like your taste in music, he includes that, but he also thinks whether you're an atheist or not is genetic.
	His parents were missionaries in Japan.
	He was born in Japan, and I don't think he believes in God.
	And now I've seen this a few times.
	I have another friend in Canada, a masseuse named Scott.
	We used to plant trees together.
	His parents were missionaries, and he wanted to believe in God desperately, and he just couldn't.
	It wasn't there for him.
	And I think God made him that way.
	As Ricky Gervais says, I'd like to thank God for making me an atheist.
	I think it's natural to want questions answered, or you could genetically be predisposed to feel a sense of awe I think I could argue that having a high IQ makes you religious.
	Because you look at the infinite universe and go, this is magical beyond a normal mind.
	Something big is going on here.
	And I think maybe a small minded person would just go, it's a tree, whatever.
	Or on my Thursday show, there's a snake mimicking Caterpillar.
	Oh well, its head looks exactly like a deadly snake.
	Eh, something happened.
	But a smart person goes, wow, the microchip that started this 3.5 billion years ago is a magical piece.
	Anyway, so I believe a lot of liberals are genetically communist.
	They genetically want problems solved for them.
	And you see this if you are at a riot or any kind of a protest.
	The second there's any kind of conflict, they scream, Police!
	Police!
	I was in New York right after 9-11, and there were these people.
	They were all wearing white.
	They looked like a weird cult.
	And they were saying, uh, compassion, not revenge.
	They were really worried about us hurting Muslims.
	And they also had this anti-Israeli propaganda.
	And, uh, this is Israel's fault.
	And get mad at Israel, not the Middle East, holding up these signs wearing, like, white turtlenecks and stuff.
	And there was some Jewish guy, biker, tough guy, with his girlfriend walking by.
	That's New York.
	And he spat on them.
	And the second the spit hit this guy's white turtleneck, the anti-Semitic hippie liberal, he screamed, POLICE!
	At the top of his lungs, right?
	And then they got into a kerfuffle, and you know what everyone did?
	Everyone grabbed the victim and the spitter and called the police and They the guy couldn't get loose.
	He had like six people holding on to him.
	I'm not exaggerating So let's say a dozen people holding both of these people so the police could come And do what?
	File a bunch of spit paperwork?
	What are we doing?
	And that's New York's all liberals, and that was liberals going, this has to be handled by police.
	Saw a video the other day, it might have been fake, but if it wasn't, it's relevant to my argument.
	And it was some MMA fighter and someone jumped out of the car in front of him and smashed his car with a baseball bat.
	He gets out of the car, he knocks one guy out, and he chokes out the other guy.
	And then he drives away.
	And the woman recording it, you can hear her say, Did you get the plates?
	Did you get the plates?
	Did you get the license?
	I saw this, another video, I think it was from last year in Columbus Day.
	And it was a truck.
	And all these protesters stood in front of the truck.
	The truck just goes, you know what, screw this.
	He runs over one of the, he just plows, plows forward.
	One of them gets run over.
	And that person's in a crumpled ball.
	I don't know if the person's alive or not.
	I couldn't tell.
	What if it ran over his head?
	And everyone on the tape is saying, did you get the license?
	Yeah.
	And the guy recording it is saying, I got it.
	I got it.
	Call the police, call the police.
	And he was so thrilled that he had this guy's license plate and they can call the police.
	That he didn't even care about the person who'd just been run over.
	Dude, your buddy might be dead!
	It's wonderful that you can call the cops, and you can go file paperwork, and this has been documented.
	Good for you.
	Great.
	The authorities have this on record now.
	Wonderful.
	We're all impressed.
	But someone is dying at your feet right now.
	Don't worry about the authorities all the time.
	And it's that communist mentality.
	It's this need to report people.
	I mean, that's how communism thrives, right?
	And Michael Malice talks about this in North Korea and Russia, where people's jobs are to report dissidents and report revolutionaries who might be trying to upend the state.
	And these people, they need They need a reason.
	Their existence is to be a rat.
	And if you work for the FBI and you're in the mafia, and they're going to throw you in jail unless you get bad guys, you're going to have to find some cases or you're going to get kicked out.
	That happened to, what's his name, Brad Pitt was him in a movie, Bulger, in Boston.
	He just strung the FBI along until they said, you're fired from being a snitch.
	You don't give us enough stuff.
	In Russia and North Korea, these snitches, they need to get numbers or they're in trouble.
	So, they end up reporting family members.
	And you don't know when you're talking to your cousin, or maybe even your brother, maybe even your mother, you don't know if her job is to report people to the Anti-Dissident Coalition, ADC.
	I just made that up.
	So there's this palpable sense of doom in communism, and it's self-perpetuating.
	It doesn't really take that much work.
	You just send out these rats, and now there's this climate of fear, and now no one talks, and no one plans a revolution because they're scared.
	And we're seeing that in the West, and it's a distinctly anti-Western phenomenon.
	I remember Lisa Carver.
	I've talked about this a million times.
	She's a writer back when I was getting into it.
	She was called Lisa Suckdog at the time, and she was talking about a chatroom she was on, an anarchist chatroom.
	And she was saying, blah blah blah, the state followed my boyfriend, Boyd Rice, to work today, and they questioned him, and I'm sick of these assholes, you know, trying to terrorize us.
	She's talking about the FBI and the CIA.
	And then the other anarchist on the message board goes, stop it, Lisa!
	They can read this!
	This is public!
	And she goes, wow, the thought police don't even have to show up for work anymore.
	We police ourselves.
	That's where we're at now.
	We're policing ourselves.
	And that's what communism is like.
	It's a virus.
	And all you have to do is just sort of drop a tablet into the water supply and it starts spreading.
	And now, You don't have to go there.
	For every authoritarian, there's 15 authoritarians out there in the culture, polluting our minds and trying to censor us.
	And liberals will be the first to go.
	That's the funny thing about all this fighting for freedom, fighting for the First Amendment.
	I'm trying to protect liberals.
	I'm trying to protect everyone, obviously.
	I want maximum freedom for everyone, including Black Lives Matter.
	And say they come up with a rule, like there's a rule right now in Britain, they're talking about jailing people.
	Who check out white power sites.
	Now that's going to start to drift.
	Say that becomes a law.
	That will start drifting into CRTV.
	All it takes is the SPLC or the ADL to say that's a racist site.
	Boom.
	Now you go to that site and you're a racist.
	They bandy around the word Nazi pretty easily.
	I've been called it a million times.
	In fact, on my set, It says fascist above my head in quotes because that's what the rumors were.
	Are.
	And you're going to get Antifa and anarchists who are checking out Nazis online or something and they're going to get persecuted for being on those sites.
	If you have a law that says everyone who says anything racist goes to jail, that sounds good.
	Good, we'll catch a bunch of KKK guys.
	Mmm, you're gonna end up catching lots of blacks and Koreans.
	You're gonna- I hear the word cracker all the time.
	If you're walking around the streets of Manhattan, homeless black people will yell racial epithets at you.
	Every single day without exception.
	I don't want all those people thrown in jail.
	That's stupid.
	I can take it.
	It's a swear word.
	Ooh, you called me a cracker.
	You called me white boy.
	My Indian relatives, while drunk, have been screaming white boy at me.
	I don't want them thrown in jail.
	And that's what'll happen if we have this kind of fascism.
	You know, do you remember the Truth Campaign?
	I don't think it's still around.
	But it was a campaign to stop smoking.
	And I heard it was created and funded by Philip Morris.
	Wait, what?
	A tobacco company was heading the anti-tobacco campaign?
	Yes.
	Let me tell you why.
	Truth advocated for a lot more strict guidelines for tobacco companies.
	And Philip Morris...
	Figured, you know what?
	We're big.
	We can handle it.
	Our competition can't.
	So let's make a parameter like you have to raise the taxes on cigarettes, and you have to go through this test, and they have to be certified by this group, and they would give themselves all these extra rules and parameters because they know it would weed out the competition.
	So the truth campaign was Philip Morris's trick.
	They're a nefarious, dirty trick, and again, this happens when the government and big business get together.
	They form a disgusting cocktail of evil.
	And they thought, we'll wipe out all, like, native cigarettes.
	I don't know what small cigarette companies are, but we'll wipe them out!
	And it's sort of like, say you liked a woman.
	And the three guys like this chick.
	You, and then two hemophiliacs.
	And you say, alright honey, how about this?
	You hit us all in the arm with a baseball bat.
	And then whoever's still standing gets to take you on a date.
	Now, I can get hit in the arm with a baseball bat, leave a small bruise probably, and then I'll take the girl on a date.
	It won't even break my arm.
	Hemophiliacs, their blood doesn't coagulate, so you hit them with a baseball bat and it's going to be a black, black bruise.
	They could bleed to death, internally, if you do that.
	And so you're going to get the date.
	That's what Philip Morris was doing with Truth.
	And that's, strangely, we should almost support liberals, liberals campaigns, liberals fascist campaigns, because they're the ones that are going to die.
	They're their own worst enemies, is my point here.
	You know, there are eugenicists.
	They've wiped out the whole concept of Down syndrome via abortion.
	That's ended.
	Uh, I know what you're saying.
	You're saying, wait, is Gavin calling liberals retards and saying that they're going to abort themselves?
	Yes, I am getting there, but that's not, I'm not there yet.
	They also, when you hear liberals talk about abortion, they, they're talking about black people.
	They're saying, do you really think we need more criminals?
	Some woman who can't afford kids.
	Do you really, does she really need to be having babies?
	She can't have five, six kids.
	You know, she's not talking, they're not talking about hillbillies in trailer parks.
	They're talking about blacks.
	And they're saying we don't need more blacks in the country.
	Actually, no, I've met far far right bonafide racists who have the same beliefs.
	They're pro-choice for that very reason.
	So I say to liberals, you know that the bedfellows that you're choosing to be with are the most extreme racists in America.
	That's your bedfellow.
	And they're discussing eugenics.
	What they're really saying, what liberals are really saying when they promote abortion is, look, we did it to retards, let's do it to blacks.
	That's what they're saying.
	It's bizarre.
	It's sick and twisted.
	And the numbers of deaths, the numbers of abortions, the numbers of late-term abortions.
	I was talking to Rebecca, based Becky.
	She's the blonde in the belly of the beast.
	She does a podcast with Matt Christensen called Beauty and the Beta.
	And we were talking about this article where this woman survived abortion.
	Uh, I don't mean she survived the abortion that she had.
	The abortion survived.
	I'm sorry to laugh, but it was eight months old.
	She aborted their baby a few weeks before it was due.
	I'm gonna cry if I talk about this too much.
	The nurse heard the cries from the garbage can.
	The person lived and is now a crusader for, uh, she's a pro-life crusader.
	She has a group that's for abortion survivors.
	Apparently she's not the only person that has been rescued from a garbage.
	Kermit Gosnell talks about, or the nurses that work for him talked about hearing the screams and the cries of the aborted babies.
	Oh my god, what a subject.
	Ladies, you're doing something you can't Google Image.
	Stop it.
	But anyway, I've realized recently that this bizarre eugenics that these liberal Nazis practice via abortion, they're the victims of it too.
	They've normalized their own spinsterness.
	They've normalized their dead ovaries.
	I'm a dog mom.
	Kids are gross.
	You shouldn't have babies.
	It's bad for the environment.
	Not only does that lead you to a world where you get molested by Harvey Weinstein and you shrug it off the way I would if a gay grabbed my ass, because you're not different from a man.
	Your chastity has no value, so who cares if some guy grabs your tit?
	You're just a dude.
	Some guy grabbed a dude's tit.
	So not only do you leave yourself more vulnerable to molestation when you pretend you're a dude, but you also let your ovaries dry up.
	And the next thing you know, you suffer the same fate as all these aborted kids, babies, fetuses with Down Syndrome.
	So I don't think my kids are going to have to deal with any of the same kind of social justice warriors that I have, because they're going to be extinct.
	Isn't that crazy?
	Isn't it crazy how you talk to a conservative and you hear his ideology and then you write it down and then you talk to a liberal and he talks about his utopia and you write it down and you realize, if I could pursue two roots here.
	The guy on the right wants me to be Catholic and married by the time I'm 22 and start churning out babies and living at home.
	The other guy says, don't even think about that.
	Focus on your career.
	Become a dog mom.
	Have fun.
	In scenario two, you're just a sex doll.
	Men use you.
	I live in New York City.
	I see it time and time again.
	Men use women as booty calls.
	And you could argue that feminism has been the best thing for these guys, because they call girls up at 2 in the morning when they're wasted, they sodomize them, they fall asleep on top of them, they wake up, they might buy her breakfast, maybe not, maybe they head to work.
	And she's not expected to call back or be part of his life, because that's, I'm just a dude.
	Just a dude going to a dude's house for a dude sex affair!
	And then when she gets to be 40, the booty calls stop, and there she is with her dog.
	Alone.
	And what do these women do?
	They blog about me and call me a Nazi, because I warned them about this, and they need to discredit me to not cry themselves to sleep every night.
	Like Amanda Marcotte.
	That's the type two.
	When I did my Three Types of Terrible Journalists, type two are the ones who live alone.
	In fact, I think Amanda Marcotte's Twitter bio says, owned by two cats.
	It's profoundly heartbreaking that they chose this life for themselves.
	And my scenario has them happy and fulfilled, creating a life.
	Yeah, but then I'll get divorced.
	No, my scenario is anti-divorce.
	I don't like divorce.
	That's another problem with the right too.
	Is we don't abhor divorce enough.
	We just sort of roll our eyes and say, well, he fell out of love.
	No, there has to be stigma around it.
	I was actually talking to a colleague the other day who just got divorced.
	And she was saying that it feels profoundly different.
	And I think we both agreed that We've normalized divorce so much that it's just sort of seen as, like, moving.
	Oh, you changed your location?
	Oh, you gotta call the post office and tell them you're not married anymore.
	But she said it's more like a sex change.
	Like, you're a different person.
	You walk down the street, you feel different.
	And that's what's so funny about the liberal world is they don't realize what they're doing.
	They don't realize they're creating a world of freaks and they're creating a world of sadness and misery.
	I was reading a Dear Prudence, I think it was in Slate or one of these stupid liberal sites, where this girl was saying, I've fallen in love with my roommates.
	Male and female.
	I want to kiss them on the lips.
	I love them all.
	And you think, God, you guys, your utopia sucks.
	You will never meet happier people than young Catholics who married their high school sweetheart and started churning them out right out of the gate.
	My biggest problem as a dad is that I waited so long to have kids.
	You know, a perfect dad takes his son to those motocross races where his son has his own motorcycle and he's doing those big dirt bike jumps where you're in the air for 1, 1,000, 2, 1,000, 3, 1,000s.
	one-1000, two-1000, three-1000s.
	He's making his daughter a dollhouse.
	He's taking an engine out of a lawnmower and making a go-kart with it that his son can ride around the neighborhood.
	I'm too old for that.
	I know it sounds crazy to say, I'm only 47, but I just don't have that kind of enthusiasm.
	Is there a motocross place nearby?
	Even when I drop my son off for baseball practice, I go to a bar and have a beer while I'm waiting to pick him up.
	You know, the younger dads are in there, Eagle Eye, let's go, let's go!
	They're enthusiastic.
	I'm too lazy.
	I'm too old.
	My son wants me to chase him, my youngest son.
	I do chase him.
	And then I, maybe twice, I go, I'm gonna stop.
	I gotta, this is tedious and I'm tired.
	Patton Oswalt has a bit about that.
	His daughter, when she was like four, she wanted him to dance.
	And so he would dance with her and then after maybe eight seconds, he'd have to put his hand up on the wall and just start panting until his daughter thought that was a dance move.
	So now when his daughter dances, part of her, one of her little dance moves is to put her hand on the wall and start panting.
	So I'm trying to protect young people from that.
	Because the world that you've created is going to leave you miserable.
	And the evidence of that is all these spinsters, all these dog moms crying, and all this cannibalism.
	You know, if you had a Nazi skinhead rally, and there was a bunch of Nazi skinhead bands playing, everyone there is on the same page.
	I guarantee you there will be tons of violence.
	I guarantee you there will be major fights at that thing.
	Because you're dealing with a violent group.
	And liberals are the same way.
	They've created a world of rules where everyone has to be perfect.
	And no one can do any wrong, but everyone is doing all wrong.
	It's a bizarre combination of anything that seems decadent is allowed.
	You know, my old alma mater, Vice, had a thing on semen cocktails.
	And different things you can mix with semen as a drink.
	Mmm, delicious.
	Thank you for that.
	But, you know, anything a white male does is racist, and that's Nazi, and you're disgusting, and, you know, the way... We had a game for a while there.
	We would Google... It was a challenge to find something that isn't racist.
	Like socks.
	We'd find an article, socks are racist.
	Shoes.
	Hair.
	Apple pies.
	We couldn't find anything.
	Actually, try it now, Dave.
	I just thought of something.
	Windex.
	Is cleaning windows racist?
	Is keeping your windows clean racist?
	I bet windows, maybe windows are racist.
	I saw we had a professor this week say that hard work is racist.
	I bet you could find Broken Window Theory is racist.
	Yep, that was the exact article that showed up.
	Broken window.
	Okay, that's the stretch though.
	That still doesn't see- that's a broken window.
	I want to find- find out if- I have a feeling, I've discovered it.
	I have a feeling that cleaning windows is not racist.
	Using Windex, or you can use vinegar.
	You could use vinegar and an old newspaper and clean your windows.
	I have a feeling that that is not yet racist, but it will be considered racist.
	It's a sign of privilege to have clean windows.
	But when you create a world like that, you'll be the first to go.
	When you create a fascist world of rules... I remember there was a store, I think it was called Little Birds in Vancouver, I believe?
	Maybe it was Calgary in Canada.
	And these feminists fought very hard.
	They hated pornography.
	And so they fought very hard to define it and to keep it out of Canada.
	And pornography is anything that subjugates a woman, blah blah blah.
	Erotica shows love.
	Pornography is violent and blah blah.
	I don't know what their parameters were.
	You can imagine what they are.
	Porn and... to differentiate porn and erotica is... I don't think it's possible.
	I think it's something you just have to see and you can tell.
	But um...
	They came up with these parameters and the Canadian government is cuck central and so they just took them.
	Yes, okay!
	And they implemented it as law.
	Guess who was the first to suffer?
	Little birds.
	They could no longer import their own lesbian literature because these laws had crippled them.
	That's what liberals don't understand.
	You guys are the ones who are screwing up.
	We're Philip Morris.
	We can take it.
	You can add a million parameters.
	You can say every sexual dalliance you have will be broadcast on the internet.
	We're going to find out that you are the disgusting one.
	And when we saw that with Michael Isaacson, remember him?
	The giraffe-necked Antifa that was on Tucker?
	We started going through his past, and we find out he's on all these disgusting S&M sites where he likes to be tied up and beaten.
	Antifa themselves!
	I wrote an article about this, I think it's called Mainstreaming Radicals or something, and I believe his name was Mika Rhodes?
	See if you can dig that up.
	He was an Antifa guy who was raping Young teenagers that were joining.
	Men and women.
	I think he was in Portland or something?
	He was taking new recruits and forcibly having sex with them.
	Luke Coon is another one.
	He was the one who wanted to disrupt our deplorable party.
	He's still, by the way, violating his parole by going out and protesting.
	Um, he was a guy who regularly wrote about sexualizing young boys.
	And he talked about how Ronald McDonald, we should make him into a pedophile because pedophilia is less harmful than McDonald's food.
	Uh, he wrote fan fiction about sexualizing young boys and how we have to... These Nambla guys always say the same thing.
	They imply that kids are dying to have sex and we're holding them back.
	And we have to liberate these young boys and let them enjoy disgusting old homosexuals like Luke Kuhn.
	And so, when they come up with all these morality rules, the most immoral people end up becoming exposed.
	So it almost makes me say, should we just leave them to their own devices?
	I mean, they're literally making themselves extinct with all this anti-baby stuff.
	You don't have conservatives in the South saying, we need to stop having kids, it's bad for the environment.
	We have these annoying spinsters.
	So it's kinda good that they're not having kids.
	I mean, I'm not advocating genocide, but if they are genetically annoying, and it's not their environment, they're just meant to be this irritating, maybe it's good that they're pulling themselves out of the gene pool.
	I sound like a liberal right now, because liberals always say stuff like that.
	They're so pro-death.
	Even after Las Vegas, they said, oh good, a bunch of Trump fans died.
	That's awesome.
	Lost their jobs for it.
	But these eugenicists are the victims of their own eugenics.
	And they're the victims of their own fascism.
	They want to police words?
	Well, you guys say the worst things.
	You know, you see this with bullying.
	They go, women are victims of bullying a disproportionate amount online.
	Yeah, that's true.
	By women.
	Women are the ones harassing these women.
	Everything.
	Every rule they come up with hurts them.
	Even catcalling.
	I think it's illegal in some European countries now.
	If you're working class, black and hispanic, in the Bronx, you like being catcalled.
	Sorry.
	And I'm saying this because I see it.
	And I was surprised.
	I'm a Canadian.
	I'm a British Canadian.
	So I would come to New York in the 90s, and I'd see this like, hey mommy, how you doing?
	God bless you.
	It's never, it's not vulgar by the way.
	In fact, I heard more vulgar cat calls in Quebec.
	Some guy told my girlfriend he wishes he was in her bike seat.
	Kind of funny, actually.
	But in New York, it's more like, Hey, Mommy!
	Oh, you're so beautiful!
	God bless you!
	God bless you!
	You wanna go on a date?
	Look at you!
	Unbelievable!
	And the reaction is not crying.
	She's like, Maybe someday, Papi!
	Maybe!
	Oh yeah, you wish!
	You wish!
	And not right now!
	I got a boyfriend!
	And she's smiling.
	So you want to jail those guys?
	Okay.
	First of all, you're jailing a bunch of blacks and Hispanics.
	Secondly, you're protecting a woman who was enjoying herself.
	Thirdly, you're creating a Nazi state.
	And Philip Morris here can handle that.
	It was like Mitt Romney, where they just combed and combed through his records.
	And what did they find?
	He has some offshore accounts.
	Uh, good.
	I don't want you giving your money to the government.
	If you have tons of money, please keep it away from the government.
	I don't consider that a scandal.
	Or with Rick Perry, they go, yeah, one of his hunting lodges that he went to had a nickname that involved the N word.
	Ooh, what a crime.
	Donald Trump told a joke on a bus 10 years ago.
	Oh my God.
	Okay, so let me get this straight.
	Now we're policing everyone's bank account, every, the name of every place everyone's been to, And now we're policing every joke you've said in private?
	This is, I talked about this last week with Milo's emails.
	So now we're policing your passwords?
	Everyone has to tell the state their password to make sure it's not racist.
	And journalists who don't like you, who have an axe to grind, who wear Nazi glasses, those journalists get to go through thousands and thousands of your emails and take whatever quote they want out of context?
	You could go through Ted Cruz's emails.
	You could go through a lifetime of them.
	And I bet you'll be pretty good.
	If you were to go through, say, any writer at the Daily Kos, or any of these disgusting talk show hosts, and see the infidelities they have, and the racist things they say, you will come up with so much crap.
	And here's my point.
	I don't want that to happen.
	I want Seth Meyers' disgusting personal life to stay personal.
	I'll bet you, you know, you're going to see so much infidelity on the left, and so little on the right.
	I was on Anthony Comey's show with Artie Lange yesterday, and Carlos Mencia was talking about what perverts all us conservatives are.
	It's such a cliché.
	It's based on like...
	British politicians during Thatcher's era, who they discovered were going to these S&M brothels.
	And now, every redneck in the South, with a family of five, is the same.
	Because they're both conservatives.
	Yeah, no.
	I've been living in cities since 1988.
	I've seen a lot of perverts.
	And, uh, they tend to be on the left.
	And they tend to be sad.
	You know, this polyamory, this is a new trend.
	I was talking about this on my show.
	Dan Savage did a big talk about how monogamy is an unreasonable expectation.
	And if you are married for 50 years, this, I'm quoting him, if you're married for 50 years and you touch one person's genitalia once in those 50 years, you're a failure at monogamy.
	This is the way the left works, by the way.
	They come up with a ridiculous, exaggerated example, and then they conduct their entire ethos based on that.
	Like abortion.
	Well, what if a father rapes his daughter and she gets pregnant?
	I looked that up, because I hear liberals say it so many times.
	I could find one case of that in America.
	It was a black guy, by the way.
	One case.
	It's not a trend.
	It's not something you base policy on.
	Why is abortion illegal?
	Oh, obviously to stop those dads raping their daughters.
	You know, that thing that happens all the time and the women get pregnant?
	Well, we were having too many retarded babies from dad rapes.
	Oh, okay.
	Well, I'm glad you nipped that in the bud.
	They love doing that.
	And they also, by the way, they love daughter.
	You'll have some thing where you go, I don't know about capital punishment.
	I don't know about the death row.
	Oh yeah?
	What if someone cut your daughter's head off and drove it on the top of their car?
	Oh my God.
	I want that guy killed.
	Always, always.
	In fact, the way they instantly go to Nazi, I've noticed they will, you can also time how long it takes them to get to your daughter.
	And I think, you're clearly trying to make me irrational.
	And that's evidence that your argument is not rational.
	Oh, you don't think we should shoot people randomly in the street?
	What if those people killed your family?
	Uh, yes, yes.
	Now I believe you.
	Now I advocate for what you're talking about.
	The Gestapo going around with M16s mowing everyone down.
	I want that!
	I want America to become Las Vegas.
	The Las Vegas shooting should be coast to coast.
	Because you put that horrible image in my head and now I'm a lunatic.
	So, this idea of intense state scrutiny and intense state control will fare very badly for you.
	Look at Pinochet, and we love to joke about throwing people off of helicopters, but I did an article once and I said, it's easy to find, it's on TakiMeg, and I actually sort of half-jokingly thought, maybe Pinochet's good.
	He did get rid of all the communists, and I know that I have a Chilean neighbor upstate, a gay guy named Maurice, and Maurice is just incredible.
	Like, he built a chicken coop on a whim, and then gets a bunch of chickens.
	They were eaten by bears, but it was still cool when they were there.
	And he goes, I want a fountain here.
	He builds like a stream, man-made stream, that goes up his hill, and then it has a little fountain in the bottom of it, which my son fell into.
	I was up at the top of the hill, and I just see I see him fall and I go, oh my god!
	And I just see his little shoes upside down.
	It was horrific, but looking back it was just kind of funny.
	He looked like Charlie Brown, just shoes sticking out of the pond.
	Luckily, he figured out how to get up.
	He's crying his face off.
	But I would have saved him even if he was, even if he didn't get up himself.
	But anyway, sorry.
	Maurizio can do anything and he told me about growing up in Chile where at 11 p.m.
	there was a curfew and if you're out on the streets you're dead.
	Cops will beat the crap out of you.
	So you'd be at a party at 10 40 and you'd go hmm is this worth staying till 7 a.m.
	It's a pretty good party, but it's is it 7 a.m.
	Good sometimes it was and you just stay there all night because you can't go out and I thought maybe that growing up in an intense discipline made you this awesome guy that can do anything He's a master baker, like he's done, he'll just pick a job and become a master of it overnight.
	Not overnight, sorry, he'll put in the time.
	So I started talking to Chileans and he hooked me up with relatives and stuff and my hypothesis for my article was maybe Pinochet's good for you.
	A jokey hypothesis.
	And I talked to one guy, I heard of all this stuff too, like at riots they would shoot the protesters with blue dye so you'd be a smurf, and then for weeks after if the police saw anyone, any smurfs, anyone with blue skin, they would just beat the crap out of them because it was proof that you were at that protest.
	But one of the guys pointed out something really interesting.
	He's a rich Chilean.
	He said, do you realize, by the way, you're having fun and you're playing this sort of mind game with this article.
	Do you realize that you would be arrested and imprisoned within a week of doing your job?
	Someone who's in the media and wants to play games and come up with new angles on something, innovative angles that he doesn't necessarily believe, but he wants to throw them out.
	Like when Roosh V said that if we made rape legal, if you had invited him to your home, women would be a lot more careful about who they invite home.
	By the way, he was massacred for that, and he became the guy who is pro-rape and wants to make rape legal for an article that was more like satire, like it was Jonathan Swift telling the poor to eat their babies.
	So we do kind of have fascist tendencies, but it's not the government, it's the populace.
	But anyway, this Chilean said to me, if you were doing this article, you'd be in jail.
	And that's when, by the way, when I abandoned the whole Pinochet advocacy because it hurt me, and I don't like being hurt.
	But in a Pinochet America, guess who goes?
	The homosexuals, the blacks, the Hispanics, the liberals, the left.
	Guess who can stay?
	Philip Morris, the cigarette companies, the normal people, the family men, the armed conservatives with rifles in their homes, the ones who know how to fight, who have been in fistfights.
	Antifa is the first to go.
	We've seen this happen time and time again.
	Look at Iran, 1979.
	The communists took it over.
	They said to the Muslim clerics, you guys just sit there in the White House for while we do this revolution and just make sure no one breaks anything.
	And then they did the revolution.
	They were successful.
	And they go, OK, Muslims, out.
	Let's go.
	We're doing it now.
	And the Muslims said, no, actually.
	We're the government now.
	And your wife has to wear a burqa.
	And they fought it, but it was too late.
	And so, the communists were the first to go.
	Che Guevara.
	What did he do after Cuba?
	He killed all the homos.
	They're gross.
	And he loved it.
	He loved killing blacks.
	Shooting them in the head.
	He loved killing homosexuals.
	And he loved shooting anyone who disagreed with him in the head.
	Sometimes they were on his side.
	But they bugged him.
	And he bragged about it.
	So, the revolutionaries, the lefties, the liberals, they're creating a world that is fascist.
	And in a fascist world with unattainable standards, you die.
	What's unique about the right?
	Well, we say, if you're good at it, you can do it.
	What's unique about the left?
	That's not good enough for them.
	What does Michelle Obama say when she sits with Oprah?
	She goes, be better, be better, be better.
	Be better.
	They say it that many times.
	Oprah asked her, what should we tell men on Father's Day?
	And she said, just be better.
	Be better.
	Be butter.
	Be butter.
	And Michelle Obama says this all the time.
	She says, if you're in a room where everyone looks like you, change that.
	Now, I don't believe she says this to sanitation workers.
	She's talking about boardrooms.
	So if it's GE having a boardroom meeting and everyone is a white male, that's gotta change.
	I don't know why.
	Why is that?
	That's a lefty thing.
	Why does everything have to be a pizza pie?
	Why is it a given that if there's a room of white males, then someone's been denied something?
	We don't say that about basketball, when there's a room of tall black guys.
	We don't go, where's the short, bald Jewish men who have been denied this position?
	Maybe those guys are better at that job.
	All jobs?
	No, America's 80% white.
	So sanitation is also dominated by white males.
	Baseball is dominated by Hispanics.
	Why is there this compulsion to, as Jerry Seinfeld said, make everything into a pizza pie?
	And here's my point.
	The left's compulsion to make everything into a pizza pie, where it all looks like Justin Trudeau's cabinet, and it's 50% male, 50% female, if blacks are 14% of the population, they're 14% of everything.
	Academia, everything.
	Everything has to reflect this.
	To enforce that kind of justice, in quotation marks, is going to hurt you.
	I mean, I remember reading that blacks who are affirmative actioned in the university, they tend, or anyone, they tend to be in over their heads and they drop out.
	And they don't drop out and go to a lesser college, they quit school entirely.
	So affirmative action ends up screwing those black kids.
	By the way, speaking of cannibalism, another example is... Black students have been protesting Africans saying that the affirmative action programs are letting in too many Africans and not enough American blacks.
	You see the tangled web you weave?
	How about this?
	How about people with the best grades get into school?
	Yeah, but then it's gonna be mostly Asians.
	Oh no!
	I'm so scared!
	You know, you walk around McGill University in Montreal, I used to live near it, and I would walk through the campus and I thought I was in Beijing.
	I don't think they have affirmative action programs there.
	And you know, by the way, that affirmative action in schools penalizes Asians, I think keeps whites the same, or maybe penalizes them a little bit, and then rewards blacks and Hispanics to even up the numbers, because school has to be a multicultural experience.
	What?
	Asians are actually, I said this on Twitter, I said, Why aren't Asians having a class action lawsuit?
	And someone pointed out they are.
	There's a whole big thing going on with Ivy League schools where Asians are suing them.
	Suing them for that, for penalizing them.
	Because it's racist!
	And this is a great example of this egalitarianism, where you want to force equality down everyone's throat, you want to force everyone to be the same, and you end up hurting people.
	You end up hurting invisible minorities.
	Asians are a visible minority.
	They're not necessarily rich.
	You're hurting poor Chinese immigrants who came here and are really good at math.
	Now they're not allowed to be at that school?
	Because you want this pizza pie?
	You're going to be your own victims of this pizza pie.
	It's gonna burn your mouth.
	I was reading this morning about this guy.
	God, he's really detestable.
	His name is Joshua Boyle.
	He's a Canadian who is dating Omar Khadr's sister.
	Now, Omar Khadr is this guy who was murdering American military.
	They caught him trying to blow up this building.
	It didn't work.
	They go to rescue him.
	Make him a POW and he gets shot in the eye, I believe.
	He kills one of the medics coming to save him.
	And they air ambulance Omar Khadr to a hospital, fix him up, top surgeons, Germans I believe, and then they send him to Guantanamo Bay.
	He gets out, he sues America, and I believe Justin Trudeau awarded him 20 million dollars?
	I mean, it's disgusting, isn't it?
	I think I just gave myself a headache describing it.
	So anyway, this guy Joshua Boyle dated Omar Khadr's sister.
	He's an anti-American.
	He's a jihadist.
	He's a white jihadist who hates the West, like many liberals.
	And so he breaks up with Omar Khadr's sister, starts dating this woman, gets her pregnant, and then he says in 2012, you want to go backpacking in Afghanistan?
	Yeah, okay.
	So she's pregnant with twins.
	They go backpacking in Afghanistan.
	Now, this to me is a very exaggerated example of what the left wants.
	They just want to hate the West, and they have nothing to replace it, and they choose jihadists as bedfellows.
	So what happens?
	They get kidnapped.
	The kids are like four now.
	The kids were born in captivity.
	They've been hostages for five years.
	And the Pakistani government just found them and freed them.
	By the way, you can pretend there was some big Navy SEALS thing.
	We're going in!
	Helicopters.
	We know what happened here.
	America gives Pakistan a big bunch of money to fight terrorism.
	They probably went up to the jihadists and said, look, we have this, we have a hundred bucks to fight terrorism.
	Here's 20 if you can give us those hostages.
	Thanks.
	Bye.
	Transaction.
	I bet it was done on the internet.
	I bet they didn't even meet anyone.
	Okay, wire the money to this account and I'll get rid of the annoying Canadian guy.
	He's bugging me anyway.
	I'm sick of raping his wife too.
	She's boring.
	She's, she's old.
	She's all used up.
	And so they released them.
	And he refused, Joshua Boyle refused to get on the plane because he was scared of persecution from the American government because he had dated Omar Khadr's sister.
	Are we, are we grasping the level of mental illness here?
	That's what the left is.
	They're mentally ill.
	Cernovich, the other day, he goes, I'm doing this documentary about fake news.
	Maybe I shouldn't let that cat out of the bag.
	And you want to be in it?
	And I said, certainly, but I don't call it fake news anymore.
	It's mentally ill news.
	If you are petrified of Nazis taking over America, and you talk about literal genocide, and I hate the word literal, but they use it in that context, so it's relevant.
	And you talk about that all the time, and you think Steve Bannon is a white supremacist.
	If you believe all that, you're not fake.
	That's not lying.
	You're mentally ill.
	You're delusional.
	And this idiot, Joshua Boyle, who took his pregnant wife backpacking in Afghanistan, and then, after being a hostage for five years, refused to get on the plane because he's worried about what the Americans will do to him?
	You know his wife was raped.
	You know it.
	And you're scared of America after being a hostage?
	An ISIS hostage for five years?
	You're mentally ill!
	The left is deranged, and if they get their way with anything, it will be bedlam!
	It will be complete, total, and utter anarchy burned to the ground.
	What did the Antifa do in Hamburg?
	They burnt it down.
	Occupy Wall Street made tons of money because older liberals with money wanted them to burn it, burn the society down.
	They wanted to get rid of Wall Street.
	They don't even know what Wall Street is.
	Wall Street is a place Where businesses say, Hi, I make grapple grommets.
	If you gave me more money, I'll give you equity and then we can make more grapple grommets because I've got some great clients who are very interested.
	Sounds good.
	Here's the money.
	Let's grow our money together.
	Because there is not a finite number of Slices of the pie.
	There's infinite pies.
	Let's make more pies together.
	You want to get rid of that?
	Why?
	And, uh, what does this grapple grommet do now?
	Does he do it online?
	Okay, I guess we could do that.
	That's stupid.
	But occupy- but Wall Street still exists.
	Anyway, they got a bunch of money to do this.
	And I remember seeing in the post, they had a big meeting to see what they can do with this money.
	Let's say it was, I think it was quite a bit, I think it was like 300 grand or something for a bunch of stupid hippies in a park who were raping people as Andrew Breitbart pointed out.
	And their ideas included burn it, which by the way I'm all for.
	If you have tons of money and you don't know what to do with it and one option is giving it to the government, please burn it.
	It'll be better for inflation and everything.
	Obama printed way too much money, please burn your money.
	Another idea was, why don't we pay a farmer to grow food for us?
	Vegan food, by the way.
	And then at the next rally, we'll have free food.
	Because our farm will have made it.
	So I guess he has to grow, say, 40 different crops at once?
	And make pasta?
	Like, does he make the pasta himself?
	How does this work?
	Or you just have a big bucket of beets?
	So at a protest, you could show up with some beets?
	Great!
	Their ideas were like that.
	That's their plan B. That's what they were going to burn society to the ground.
	That's what they want to replace it with.
	And by the way, they don't want to eat a bucket of beets.
	So their utopia is worse for them than our utopia.
	In our utopia, they thrive.
	It's like Maggie Thatcher said.
	She said that the socialists would rather have the rich and the poor down here, low, but close together, rather than have both of them up higher, but the wage gap to be bigger.
	So they would rather the rich make $100,000 a year, and the poor make $40,000 a year, than the poor to make $100,000 a year if the rich are making $4 million a year.
	They don't like that second scenario.
	And she was talking about the opposition in Parliament, but it's true of the liberal mindset.
	They don't care about everyone being better off, as long as the rich are worse off.
	As long as white males suffer, they're fine.
	And in that world, They suffer too.
	So we have to protect them from themselves.
	It was like when I worked in advertising, we often said we had to protect the client from themselves, because they'd have a terrible idea that would hurt their brand.
	And we'd have to say, here's why I don't think that would be great.
	And that what I'm discussing, what I'm describing, by the way, is called a patriarchy.
	It's a world We're family men of all races and all religious religions.
	It's a world where family men who have kids who own land who pay tax tend to run the show.
	And these guys have been running the show, these guys meaning me, have been running the show for about 250,000 years, and we've ironed out quite a few kinks.
	We're benevolent.
	You know, when the aboriginals run things, they tend to sacrifice virgins.
	When we had a, when we had, before Christianity, when it was a pagan culture, we used to burn babies alive and throw virgins into fiery pits to appease a bunch of gods.
	We got rid of all that.
	So there's been quite a few kinks that we've ironed out over the years.
	We separated church and state.
	Glasgow University did that.
	Very troublesome time.
	A lot of heads rolled.
	A lot of blood shed.
	But we separated church and state.
	We created the Industrial Revolution.
	We did a lot for women.
	We got them the right to vote.
	We had a massive war in America that cost 650,000 white male lives, and that's about the equivalent of 5 million today.
	It was an American Holocaust.
	We did all that and ended slavery, created the freest nation in the world, And you want to tear it down.
	Well, you're going to make it something it wasn't.
	You had Linda Sarsour run the Women's March.
	She wants women to be second-class citizens.
	She wants women not to be able to vote.
	She wants women not to be able to drive.
	She wants to exterminate Jews.
	She's going back to Nazi Germany and then back in time even further.
	So she's sort of like a time traveler, Johnny Appleseed with a little basket, going back through time, picking up the worst garbage from history and putting it into her society basket.
	I'm not letting you do that.
	I'm not letting you go back in time.
	I worked too hard to get here.
	I worked too hard to create the freest place in the world that is the best place to be gay, black, a woman, a dissident, a revolutionary, an antifa.
	You'll never be freer as an anarchist, reprobate, disgusting psycho.
	You'll never get a fairer trial than here in America.
	Murderers will never get a fairer trial than here in America because we got here with trial and error.
	We saw the Trail of Tears.
	We saw Wounded Knee.
	You know, Wounded Knee was horrific.
	Women and children were shot in the back as they ran away.
	What did we learn from that?
	Well, first of all, the reason we know about it is because Whites documented it because soldiers documented it.
	Soldiers are disgusted by Wounded Knee.
	I think Obama was talking about the Cleveland Indians' name and sports teams' names.
	Meanwhile, those soldiers are still on the record as having received medals for shooting those Indians in the back.
	Revoke those medals, please.
	Military guys want those medals revoked.
	It makes all the other medals look bad.
	We've learned from that.
	We've learned from our treatment of the Indians.
	Pat Buchanan talks about this, that we have a dark past.
	Everyone does.
	But who else has worked harder to make a difference, to change those, to learn from those mistakes?
	Nobody.
	And every time you come up with a solution, it involves more government, more regulation, more police, more authoritarianism.
	I don't want that.
	And I'm not going to stand for it, by the way.
	That's the other thing.
	I'm not saying I'm scared of you and you're going to fight me.
	It's like a tall guy in Glasgow, Scotland.
	Tall guys in Glasgow have to fight every day.
	They don't like it.
	And they say, they're not victims, but they are attacked every day.
	I was saying this to a reporter the other day.
	She goes, oh, so you think men are victims?
	You need a safe space?
	And I go, no, no, no, no.
	I'm winning.
	I'm just still attacked.
	It's like the war on Christmas.
	Christmas will survive, but you are constantly attacking it.
	And short men in Glasgow constantly attack tall guys, and these tall guys beat the crap out of them.
	Tall guys are the, tall Glaswegians are the greatest fighters on earth out of sheer practice.
	So when you try to shut down Christmas, when you try to embrace radical Islam, when you try to shut down the patriarchy, when you try to end breeding and tell women that their ovaries will last forever, when you use feminism to oppress people, when you try to brainwash my kids with Marxism, all of that stuff is just a small man in Glasgow.
	I'm a big man in Glasgow.
	I will kick your ass.
	I will win.
	The patriarchy will win.
	You talk about smash capitalism.
	Yes, you can talk about it all day.
	In fact, capitalism awards you that right.
	You do it on your iPhone.
	You do it on your computer that my capitalism provided for you.
	So I'm not saying that I'm going to prevent you from bitching, but as far as actual tactical effects, as far as actually taking down the patriarchy, the answer is no.
	Go to your room.
	I'm still your dad.
	You can bitch and say you hate it here.
	You can slam your bedroom door and say, I'm never going to bed.
	Or I'm going to stay up and look at my iPhone all night.
	No, I'm taking your iPhone.
	I'm the dad.
	I'm still the patriarch.
	So you can come over here and you can say, this is my house now.
	I'm going to take over.
	I'm going to stand here with my shotgun.

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