Andrew Schulz and Akaash Singh dissect Mark Gagnon's secret Sunday wedding, the Netflix "Cuties" controversy, and Disney's ethical dilemma over Georgia's abortion bill and Xinjiang filming. They critique Hollywood's performative wokeness regarding Academy diversity mandates, mock Joe Budden's business failures while highlighting Joe Rogan's political sway in moderating a potential Biden-Trump debate. The hosts also condemn J.K. Rowling's transphobia, defend Will Smith, and address John Wall's immature partying, ultimately framing these cultural moments as evidence of shifting power dynamics in media and corporate morality. [Automatically generated summary]
Transcriber: nvidia/parakeet-tdt-0.6b-v2, sat-12l-sm, and large-v3-turbo
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Taylor's Edible Mishap00:13:03
What's up, everybody?
And welcome to Flagrant 2.
It's your boy Sheltie here.
We got Akashic Alex Media.
Mark Gagnon is back.
We got Taylor.
Okay.
Taylor is off camera because she got so fucking high before this podcast.
She ate an edible.
She thought none of us would notice.
But we noticed, Taylor, okay?
We noticed that you were high.
All right?
I'm not deaf.
I'm high.
You're not.
Fair enough.
She still got her wits with her.
All right.
Anyway, listen.
I don't know how many times we restarted this podcast, but we just got to congratulate Mark.
Mark is married officially.
He's back here.
After his honeymoon.
Do you think it was wrong for me to criticize you having a honeymoon after your marriage?
What the fuck is that?
What is going on?
That's Taylor's fucking phone.
That's not even her phone.
That's just Taylor going, beep beep, beep, beep.
That's how high she is, bro.
Stop it, Taylor.
Stop it.
Go walk it off.
Go run it off.
Okay?
Mark.
Stop ruining.
Look at you trying to sabotage Mark.
You had that seat.
I know.
And the second we're about to talk about Mark's wedding.
She really trying to sabotage Mark's story.
Yo.
That is.
I'm off the market, Taylor.
Okay.
Jeez.
Nah, she wants your chair.
Oh, damn it.
Anyway, so Mark, Mark got married.
I was very critical of Mark's honeymoon after his wedding.
Mark, what did you enjoy more?
Getting married or not having to work for Andrew for a week?
Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
That was about me, that one.
I thought we were ganging up on Mark.
I thought that was the longest.
I'm just curious.
I'm wondering.
Okay, no, but seriously, answer that question.
What is the question exactly?
He said, what did you enjoy more that question or not working for me?
Which I think is the same thing.
I said, getting married or not working for me.
No, let's not ask that.
Let's ask this one.
Let's ask this one.
I don't know.
When were you going to tell me that you weren't coming into work that day?
Because I texted Mark on the flight.
I said something like, yo, we got a lot of work to do.
I said, we got a lot of work to do.
It's Sunday, 9.45, Sunday.
I was like, can't wait to get an early start Monday.
At what point can you get to the next one?
Can you tell me?
The starts of the podcast.
That one instead.
The way we started the podcast.
What's up, everybody?
Walmart slates.
The way we started the first time was way more fun.
Okay.
When did you think?
When did you think?
When did you think that you were going to tell me?
When were you deciding to tell me?
Well, let me just say this.
Yeah, yeah.
Because I text you at 9.45 at night while I'm in the sky waiting for you to look at your phone and text me.
Yeah.
Remember?
And I knew there was something up because earlier in the day, I was texting Mark.
I was like, hey, man, proud of you.
I hope you're enjoying your day.
This, that, the other.
And I was like, man, we're about to get work.
We got a lot of work to do, man.
We changing the game again.
I can't wait.
It's going to be so crazy.
I ain't here from that mother for five hours straight.
Wow.
Wait, Mark be ghosting on tech.
On my wedding day.
No, this is the next day.
On my wedding next day.
It's over.
The wedding's over, bro.
We celebrated it.
Now you just married like the rest of us.
No, now I have to do it.
You haven't killed brunch the next day.
Whatever.
Whatever.
You ain't even specific.
You get the brunch the next day.
Motherfuckers still care.
And then when they leave the venue, officially, we're like, that's good.
That's in the past now.
Yeah, exactly.
Your wedding is over.
Thank you.
So if he texted you after that, wedding is over.
Akash, another married man.
Thank you.
But I'm saying if he texted you after that breakfast or whatever, if you had a meal, I don't know how white people do weddings.
Yes.
It's over.
We're done.
We're done doing this.
I'm looking for the exact thing you sent to me.
Oh, no.
Okay, this is what I said.
I'm going to start texting you right now.
I'm about to filibuster, bro.
You know, if you do that, this is what I'm going to keep scrolling.
Oh, fuck!
Texting me and it went back to my squad.
These kids are so good at technology.
Screenshot.
Put your phone on the airplane.
Put your phone on the airplane.
Take it off Wi-Fi.
Oh, fuck.
No, but it would still go.
Score.
No, take it off Wi-Fi.
Damn, did he scoreboard meet up?
I just scored all the time.
Dude, Mary Mark is so different, bro.
This guy sabotages everything, including a week of work with his fucking honeymoon piece of shit at 9.48 Eastern Standard Time.
A.M. P.M. P.M.
It's night.
I'm landing the plane, excited, getting ready to go.
What time zone was I in?
Say again.
What time zone was in the same time zone as me?
Okay.
After you took us all to Florida, right?
Tried to give us Corona.
Tried to give us a went down there.
You might have gone down there what day?
Wednesday?
I think it was Friday.
Probably checked out by Monday.
You were useless the week before.
The guy took three weeks off.
The guy took three weeks off for his wedding.
Who takes three weeks off for a wedding?
This guy got elephants at his wedding.
He only needed three weeks.
You're right about it.
Think about that.
How long is the Indian wedding?
Three days.
Three days.
That's actually just one.
Oh, gosh, fuck me.
Because he got married secretly in the night.
Yeah.
Because I didn't want to be there.
I didn't want to be.
I would have rabbit you done that.
See, I got it so sneakily that we didn't even know.
Got married on a Sunday at work on Monday.
What's good?
And no one even take a single day off.
Bro, I'm nice.
And he got real married.
None of us.
Honestly, and I spoke to Father Benjamin about this because I had words with him.
Okay.
He gave me a call and we were having a little discussion.
Okay.
About not sharing the speech that I gave on the podcast because it might have been some sacrilegious things said in that.
You know what I mean?
Please forgive me, Father Benjamin.
I love you.
You're my guy.
Love you.
Always open invitation to come.
Father, father.
Not just Father Benjamin.
You should give me father, father, God.
Also, God, forgive you.
Matter of fact, over Benjamin, no offense.
If I'm going for forgiveness, I'm going to the top.
Top down.
Yeah.
Top down.
That being said, I said, Father Benjamin, why does he have to take a week off?
I was going through it.
I said, why he got to take a week off?
He goes, he goes, well, you know, you have a wedding, you need to celebrate a honeymoon.
You know what I mean?
I go, he's 23 years of age.
His whole life has been celebrated.
The guy who went from college into doing stand-up comedy, he gets married.
It's a honeymoon.
There's no struggle yet.
No, this is a honeymoon.
That's true.
Yeah, you're completely right so far.
I like that move, though.
He had Father Benjamin cough to get him out of that.
I like that move.
That's what I'm doing.
Come on, though.
Did you do that shit?
No.
Yo, this mark, bro.
That's a move.
But do you know why you talked to Father Benjamin?
Why is that?
Because you weren't invited to my wedding.
Keep going.
I don't know what it is just yet.
There have been some weddings in the past that you weren't invited to, okay?
So maybe.
Did you see how he's trying to divide the cover?
Did you see what he's trying to say?
It don't work on another white guy, Mark.
It don't work on another white guy.
We're doing what he said.
We're spinning.
He's spinning.
I don't know.
I don't know, man.
I'm not trying to take over.
Al's bro.
Why won't I marry you?
Now everybody's in spin side.
Shit.
Chill, chill.
Translate to Spanish.
Oh, yeah, la mujer de Alex.
Porque está.
No estás casada con Alex.
Es de hijo de puta.
I called you.
I call you the fucking pickaxe.
But no disrespect to your mom, bro.
Oh, no disrespect, yo.
We shared a whole day at Harry Potter.
Oh, fuck.
I went to Harry Potter role.
Harry Potter all lasted one ride.
So rides make me sick.
You know how this is how I knew I was upset when Mark didn't come to work.
This is how I knew I was upset.
I went on two rides.
I was sick.
I tapped out.
One of the rides was the train that goes from Hogwarts to Dagon Allen.
Okay.
That shit.
I looked at the fucking 3D screen to the right.
It's not all right.
It's all right.
You didn't move it.
It takes you to the other S train in some way.
My man.
I was looking at the screen and I see Harry's flying.
Hermione's flying.
And I was getting sick.
And I said, I'm not going on no goddamn rides.
I definitely didn't go into Green God's vault.
I didn't do that one.
That shit is lit.
You messed up.
That's mad.
That shit is lit.
Mad racist in fucking Florida.
I'm looking at the vault and they're like, people looking at me.
They're like, oh, it was fucking racist, bro.
They were profiling me, bro.
They were profiling.
Come back, Taylor.
You're so hot.
Yeah, motherfuckers were asking me for loans outside of Green God's Vault.
That's disrespectful, bro.
That's racist.
That's how racist Florida is.
I hope you all get Corona.
Motherfucker came up to me asking for a picture.
I had the Trump 2020 mask on.
Oh, no.
I had to ask him to take down the mask.
I was like, come on, bro.
We're not afraid of corona.
I took a deep breath.
Anyway, so this is how I knew I was sick after going on that train.
Yeah.
After I took the fucking S train.
Yeah.
Sick.
It took me the whole rest of the day and your whole wedding to get better.
I was still sick.
You were ill during the wedding.
I was ill during the wedding and I thugged it out for you.
Wow.
Okay.
Wow, Mark.
Okay.
Piece of shit.
I can't believe it.
Okay.
Listen, I texted Mark when Mark said, Oopsie, there's been a pro-slide problem.
Yep.
It was like I was back on a train.
Oh my God.
It was I was back on the train.
What was my vibe that made you sick, though?
Do you really want to know?
Is it the fucking real baby?
Is it the basket one?
It was Hoggleworks.
Son, the Hoggleworks, the one where it's all video.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I can't even talk about it right now.
My mouth is starting to salivate.
My mouth is starting to salivate.
I'm going to get sick just talk about it.
I went on that shit with my girl.
I went on that shit with my girl.
I couldn't even pick out a wand afterwards.
I was so sick.
We were looking at all the wands.
And I was like, I can't look at them.
Just get it.
And then she got in the wedding.
What the fuck about the wand is the wand picks you.
You know what I mean?
So think about that.
Hey, you know which one?
You know which one picked me?
Huh?
Sirius Black.
I'm saying that Sirius Black.
And that's what I whipped out later that night when she wanted some.
What, Al?
Al, you never whip out that Sirius Black?
Get so.
Este negro serios.
My shit is more like a playfully joking brown.
You know what I mean?
It's a sarcastic brown.
Is his name serious black?
Yeah.
It is serious.
His wand sucks.
Yeah, yours is trash.
I wanted what I wanted Voldemort.
Why didn't you get it?
Nothing gets better.
Real talk.
Real talk.
How dare you take a honeymoon?
Yo, real talk.
That is a little Voldemort, though.
Yeah, of course.
Anyway, yeah, but my girl said she'd break up on me if I got Voldemort wand.
She takes Harry Potter very serious.
Bitch.
I bitched out, bro.
I bitched out, but I need her to nurse me back to health.
I can't do that shit myself.
Okay.
So, Mark, in conclusion, I almost called you Aladdin.
What?
That's how on-edge I am right now.
I looked at Taylor.
She's still high.
She had the most hilarious comment of her life.
Last.
That's the top comment.
You realize that, Taylor?
Oh, you got the top comment on these.
The top comment on YouTube thinking that Akash was going to have an Aladdin-style wedding.
Anyway, point is: do you feel remorseful for getting married while we had things to do?
No.
What about having an extra honeymoon?
What do you mean, extra honeymoon?
Alex?
No, Cobbett.
What counts as extra?
And then a last-minute honeymoon.
And the honeymoon is exactly where the wedding was.
That's what blew my mind: you didn't go nowhere.
I just asked him where his mind was blown.
My mind was blown.
He legit said y'all were there.
He was like, Yeah, yo, Andrew and Alex are there.
It's the same beach you were just at.
That's the honeymoon.
No, that shit hurt my heart.
Where do I go?
Go to the Bahamas.
Go to Aruba.
You don't even believe in Corona.
Why?
We can't go.
Go to Mexico, bro.
You can go to Mexico.
Everybody's in Mexico.
I'm not going to fucking Mexico.
Oh, my goodness.
Oh, my God.
That's real hard.
Mark.
You're not in Florida anymore, Mark.
We're in Brooklyn.
You cannot speak this way.
I love Mexico.
We might need people to fix the lights up in here or something like that, bro.
Yanny's coming tomorrow.
Thank you, Yanni.
Wall ain't throwing yelp yet, but you better slow down.
Nah, I can't knock Mark because in case I need a honeymoon week.
I can't knock it.
You're like, yo, Mark did it.
Let me be honest, Al.
You're the last one that's going to be that week.
But it might come.
It might come.
What you going to need a honeymoon for, Al?
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Al, what you going to do?
You need a honeymoon for Al.
You might need some funerals for some.
You might need to take some time off for some little caskets on here, some would-be showers, that's what you call.
When you pull out, you're like bro, if I was a palm bearer at his own hey, be careful, I'll be at his own kids funeral.
Yo ye, just launch that in the fucking ocean.
Damn damn so Mark, what happened bro, all that time by the sea?
Bro, get out of there.
Yo okay yo Mark, just calm down.
Bro, everybody's gonna come back.
You got your sea legs still bro, we're gonna get this back.
Okay, shout out to the new set.
Yeah, that shit.
Look pretty man, that shit's blinking anyway bro um guys, what do we got to talk about this week man, there's been some things going on.
I just want to make a statement right now.
Make it, because I know everybody's wanting me to talk about this.
So i'm gonna make a make.
This is important.
Sexualizing Young Girls00:15:18
I'm not watching cuties.
You know what?
I'm glad you're still watching.
I've been waiting to hear your response to the cuties controversy.
This whole time everybody's been telling me bro, you gotta respond about cuties.
I'm not watching cuties.
Wow, I can't watch it because here's the thing, there's no positive scenario that comes out of me watching it.
Do you know?
The movie we're all talking about it's on Netflix is about, like these little girls in France whatever, that join like a twerking crew or some like that.
Yeah, my assumption is well, people are saying it is pedophilia.
Yeah, that's what they're saying.
Yeah, but you know how like, everybody likes to call everything pedophilia.
That's the new.
Yeah right, that's like the.
That's off-white.
Yeah, it's like you.
Everybody got to call out pedophilia.
It's almost getting so excessive that my attitude is like, is that really pedophilia?
It's almost that excessive right, so everybody's going.
You got to cancel Netflix over this.
This is horrible pedophilia, is that?
My assumption with this is the marketing of the movie is probably way more egregious than the movie.
But here's why i'm not going to see the movie.
I don't want to see little girls sexualize, regardless.
My assumption is that the movie is exposing the sexualization of kids.
Yes, and how it's bad.
Yes, and unfortunately, you need to sexualize or objectify kids to showcase that.
It's the same thing like, if you want to show birth, you got to show a baby coming out of pussy.
It's by proxy, you got to show some pussy.
That being said, I don't want to see it if, if Schindler's List didn't show the atrocities that happened, it's not Shindler's List.
That's an interesting point.
So if this movie my girl started watching, like 10 people couldn't be like, trust us yo yes, with Mark, would be like well, I didn't see it.
You didn't really see it.
You saw some smoke coming out.
You don't know what that was.
It didn't seem that bad.
Yeah, it's a bonfire, we could.
All movies were black and white.
Everything looked depressing.
President, you want.
Basically, the point is, you watch this girl.
We quit 10 minutes in.
I was like, turn this shit off.
Oh, you tried it?
Yeah.
Can't.
Together is like, no, like, she wanted to watch it.
I was like, all right, let's see what everybody's talking about.
Before any actual sexualization shit happens, you just see her like looking at the magazines, whatever.
Like, this is what pretty girls look like, I guess.
But that's the commentary: is girls, I think, is young girls' minds get so warped by society that a lot of times they try to sexualize themselves young girls.
It's true.
And that's a valid point.
So they got girls wearing makeup at these little, what are they called?
Like where you see which beauty pageant.
Oh, yeah.
Toddlers and Tiars.
Like, why are they wearing makeup?
Yeah, it's horrendous.
Horrendous.
The whole point of blush.
Do you know what the point of blush is?
What?
And even lipstick?
It's when a girl is in a sexual state when she's actually like hot and like heavy and she's horny and she's ready to fuck.
Her cheeks redden and her lips redden.
So makeup is supposed to reenact what is happening to a human being, a woman, when they're getting fucked.
Why are you painting girls to do that?
What's that?
Yes, it does happen to black people.
Yes, it does.
Where do you think red bone comes from?
Where do you think red bone comes from?
Yes.
That's a girl getting boned.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We tried to save our consciousness right now.
We just tried to save it.
We tried to save it, bro.
I tried to jump right on top of it.
I swear to God, we needed guns.
We needed guns for that.
You can't win them all.
All right, so tell me, how quick did you come into the movie?
You said you only watched it.
I know, right?
The thumbnail.
Before she could even scroll down.
You're like, do you want to watch it?
Yes.
Actually, I'm going to.
Let's watch a social dilemma.
Point is, point is, I think we all agree.
Yeah, society's fucked up.
You could execute that in a way better way, maybe, or you don't even need to showcase it.
But then I started thinking, right?
I'm like, watching this show and another show on Netflix, it's absolutely hilarious.
You all should watch it called Cobra Kai.
I started watching that shit.
It's fantastic.
Fantastic.
So much fun.
What is that?
Very good.
It is a modern day sequel, if you will, to the Karate Kid.
But now the protagonist is the other guy that the Karate Kid beats.
So you're watching kids either way.
Well, here's the thing.
They're adults now.
Okay.
Right?
But I'm watching it.
And then there is kids in high school that are like making out.
And the girls that are in high school are all like done up and sexualized.
And maybe the actors are older than 18, but they're supposed to be portraying kids in high school.
And then I started to think, wait a minute, what about Gossip Girl?
Those girls were supposed to be, and guys were supposed to be in high school.
What about when we were young?
Maybe it was okay when we were young.
But what's the show, Not Save by the Belle, the next one?
They're older.
Beverly Hills Down 2 and all this kind of shit.
I'm like, wait a minute, how many high school shows where they show kids dry humping and fucking and all this kind of stuff are just regular and normal?
And I'm like, wait a minute.
This is adults watching kids be sexual.
And there was that show, Skins, I think.
It was like a British show.
Super wild.
It's like, wait a minute, you are entertaining adults with kids banging each other.
What's the fucking HBO show with Zendai or whatever?
Yeah.
Euphoria.
Euphoria.
We called out that exact shit.
And I was like, yo, why are you?
Why are you making it okay?
Like, it's just weird to me that cuties is the first time there's any pushback.
I think it's super egregious.
Yeah, it's further.
These are like 10-year-olds.
10-year-olds.
Exactly.
But it is weird that there's never been any pushback about that at all.
I also think it's because it's girls.
Keep going.
That, like, if you see young girls being sexualized, like 10, 11, I think we feel weirder about it.
Opposed to.
Like, if you see like young guys, we're into.
Yeah.
Mark, Catholic.
Tell us how you jump on.
What is you?
They didn't care about me.
Nobody seems to kid.
I was a cutie back then.
Yeah.
But like, yeah.
So, like, in the same way that, like, we're more offended by an older man like approaching or trying to like molest a young girl.
Than a female teacher molesting one of her.
A young boy.
Yeah.
Like, I think we have a different sexual attitude towards men.
100%.
But those shows are people or kids of the same age hooking up.
Right, but there's boys involved.
So they're like, oh, it's like...
Ah, because the boy is the same age as the girl, then it's okay.
But if it's only girls that are younger, I feel like that's when people get weird about it.
They do get weird about it.
We have a protective instinct, which we should over women.
Yeah.
Obviously.
But it is interesting that like watching teenagers be sexual is kind of like normal.
This is weird wording to use, but I actually think the difference is like puberty.
If you're in high school, that's happened.
If you're in cuties, it hasn't.
That's true.
And this is like an actual physical child.
You can get a 20-year-old.
Everybody's over 18, like you said.
In God's Girl, all these shows.
There is no way a 20-year-old can be in cuties acting like that.
Yo, that's a great point.
We understand that people are sexual after puberty.
Yes.
Right.
And that is kind of normal because we went through that and we were that way.
Right.
And yeah, evolutionarily, that's you are ready to reproduce now.
Right.
Right, right.
But even though we don't think that an older person should do that, but we understand.
So it is a, it is relatable.
We're like, oh, I remember being 16.
This is what I went through.
Right.
Nobody's watching it like, oh, yeah, 16 year olds are like, oh, I remember that.
Yes.
Right.
But those kids are pre-sex, pre-being horny, pre-anything.
They should not be even introduced to a sexual realm and they're being exploited in that way.
And even if the point is, yo, this is really bad, it still does feel weird to watch it because I know it's bad.
I don't need you to tell me it's bad.
Right?
Like, is anybody going, oh, wow, exploiting children is bad?
I think the message could be for women that it's not like this idea that where you're, you get sexualized or whatever so early.
There's like something fucked up about that.
Whereas I think guys know that, but I think a lot of women just kind of grow up with it and they don't, like, they don't think about it.
Right.
Honestly, I would watch the show, but fuck it.
I wouldn't watch the show, but I don't think there's that much wrong with it because it's an art depiction of what's actually happening in reality.
So because this is actually happening, there are kids this age doing the exact same things online.
It's actually a window for parents to see like, hey, this is what your child is doing.
It is a commentary.
So I need.
You have to have something to comment on.
Yes, that is a good point.
And I understand that.
And I think that that's why people defend it.
And I'm sure that's what Netflix was thinking.
They're like, yo, this is, I'm sure that a lot of people were putting this out like this is an important piece.
And we need to expose what these young girls are actually put through and went through.
Yeah.
But I'm looking at some of like the angles of the shots.
Yeah, that's the thing.
Somebody had to choose to zoom in on little girls' bodies.
I watched the guy, like a YouTuber, do like a compilation, like reaction to it.
So he shows all the wild clips.
Yes.
And it's like three minutes of these little kids twerking.
And it's like, it's not only like, here's a wide shot of girls dancing and there's some twerking going on within it.
It's that girl's twerking close-up of her butt.
Yeah.
Young girl.
I think one of the girls has her top off and one of them.
No, no, no.
They didn't show on YouTube.
Apparently, that's what I read.
I'm not sure that's true.
Yeah, I don't know.
Also, French are mad weird.
French are mad weird when it comes to, that's another thing.
Oh, their age of consent is like 15.
They keep trying to drop that shit.
There's like famous French like philosophers that have said, what's the guy who's some point at me?
I don't know.
Dan Young, bro.
Come on.
But there's some guy who is saying like the best pleasure ever is a teenager.
What is that guy?
Yeah, I'm not familiar.
Son, you are French and Catholic.
You definitely got that.
100%.
Point is, it's a, it seems to be unnecessary.
It seems to be egregious.
Yeah.
It's overdone.
You should get the point across probably with less.
Probably.
But in their minds, we're making a commentary.
Again, you got to give them something to comment on.
Yeah, but I just think I don't think they thought through how it would actually be received like viscerally.
It's like I don't want I'm trying to equate it to something like a rape scene in a movie.
Yeah, I think that's decent.
Like you like you need to show this like egregious thing that happened in the movie, but you don't need to show all of it.
I remember there's a Game of Thrones thing.
You need the scene and then the shower.
Those are the two things, right?
That like sets it.
Like there's the rape scene and then the shower.
What?
You show the shame after.
Yeah, the girl shout out.
I got you.
I got you.
It sounded crazy off.
Just to send it along.
You need the scene and then you need the shower.
But we don't think you were in the shower after watching.
You're not mentioning the shower.
You're in my shower and after watching in the movie.
That's what we're wondering, bro.
Yeah.
Look at that shower after you wag off.
Yeah, I don't, I think.
Clear that chain bang.
Oh, wow.
I got a crazy topic.
Keep going.
Go, go, go, go.
No, no, no, after this, after this.
Okay, go, go.
No, I think we just misunderstood what you were saying.
Yeah, you need the shower to show the shame that she's experiencing after.
Yeah, exactly.
Context.
You just need the context around the assault.
There was actually a scene in Game of Thrones where Jamie raped Cersei or something.
All Game of Thrones was was rapes.
Well, this one was like particularly non-consensual.
And there was a lot of pushback, but their point was like, we're trying to show the horror of it.
You can't just avoid it like it doesn't happen.
People need to see how awful this is.
And I guess the idea is maybe then anybody who could get turned that way or whatever would be like, oh, that's a fucking terrible thing to do.
Yeah, but that's the thing is like, I don't think many people are going through life like, yeah, it's okay to rape.
And then you see Game of Thrones, you're like, oh man, I'm not raping.
That's crazy.
Like, thank God you showed me how bad it was.
And now I know I really shouldn't do it, right?
I feel like they're picking things we already know are wrong and we have no interest in doing and then acting as if they should get this like pat on the back for pointing it out.
Hey, murder's bad.
Yep.
Do you know what I mean?
Like, and that's almost my annoyance with this whole like everything's a pedophile movement.
It's like, do you think you're saying something that we don't know?
Right.
Like, yeah, everybody's against pedophilia.
Yeah.
100%.
Yeah.
Everybody.
I think maybe the commentary of this is like a large part of like the anti-slut shaming movement is it's okay for a girl to be sexual.
I think maybe the comment is cool, have that, but there's also there's an age at which it's appropriate and there's an age at which when can a girl when can a girl be sexual?
18.
What age?
18.
That was the right answer.
Yeah, right answer.
I wasn't sure what you were going to say, but you said the right thing.
No, that's a weird thing, man.
As a parent, as a parent, you are going to get to decide when your daughter is going to sexualize.
You will try, but girls, I mean, like, what are you really going to be able to stop?
Don't let her buy the clothes.
There you go.
Yeah, so then they sneak it.
They buy it.
And they figure it out.
Good.
They put it in their bag and then they change it when they get to school and shit like that.
Like, that's the thing.
That's why I feel this show is good to show people.
I think part of the outrage is because people were like, wait, what the fuck?
This is happening?
I think part of that is that outrage.
Because one, people don't know what's happening.
And then two, it's like, ew, you're putting this thing in my face that I'm not, I don't feel comfortable watching.
You don't think people know that these kids are being sexualized?
I don't think all people know.
Dude, it's fucking horrifying.
I wasn't aware of how you got to all the people that don't know the apps.
Can I tell you some shit that like really fucking, it was like, it broke my heart, dude.
I was in Japan.
Okay.
We're in this, I forget the name of the street, but it's a very famous street.
It's like where all the Hari juki girls hang out.
Super Packed Street.
I mean, like, guaranteed Corona.
If this was Corona time, forget it.
You can't even move.
Ramped.
Okay.
We go downstairs to this like photo booth arcade.
Imagine an arcade, but there's no arcades.
It's just different photo booths where you can morph your face and your features.
And it's just teenage Japanese girls in there morphing their facial features to kind of look like anime and like making their lips bigger and their eyes bigger and making their faces change.
And you're in there.
You're like, oh, this is just girls doing like fun, like little girl shit.
And then I sat there for a second.
I'm with my girl.
I'm like, oh, this is horrifying.
They're 14 years old already picking out everything that's wrong with their face and changing it to have this idealistic looking face that they'll never be able to achieve.
They're not going to be a fucking cartoon.
They're not even picking it out.
The machine.
The machine is giving them jobs.
You got to make this bigger.
You got to change this.
I mean, how fucked up is that?
Like, you throw a filter on your face and then the filter basically goes, yo, that's what's fucked up on you.
You would look better like this.
It's crazy.
Makes your nose thinner.
Why would I know?
You know what I mean?
But like it does all these little things, man.
So I do agree with you.
There is that conversation to be had.
I think you can do that without close-ups of a fucking 11-year-old girl.
You should watch it before you say like, yeah, maybe.
I'm not going to, but yes, I'm going to take a look at it.
And that's the only trick.
If they trick you into watching some shit you don't even want to watch.
Like I don't, even if I watch it and I go, I understand the point they're trying to make.
And that's kind of like what I'm coming out with right now.
I don't want to have that in my head.
Yeah, absolutely not.
I didn't know it was as early as it was, 13, 14, even.
I'd be like, I guess I could see it.
I did not know.
She's like fucking six in the movie.
I think I don't know.
No, I know.
And I think she's like 11.
She looked mad.
I don't know.
I don't know young girls' ages.
I don't care.
But I was like, oh, it's that early.
Yeah.
Oh, it's like elementary school shit.
That's crazy.
Yeah.
Like, we all watched the Epstein documentary.
I don't think it would be better with like a reenactment of him abusing his kid.
Saving Money on Insurance00:03:07
Yeah, like we got the point.
You just told us what happened and then we're good.
Yeah, I didn't leave being like, well, the plane, like, what was it on the plane?
Show us the massage.
Yeah.
How did it work?
What do you mean his dick was egg shaped?
Show us the dick.
That's so true.
Like, you know how they do those reenactments in those like murder shows where like the girls kill their husbands.
They're like, oh, this is how it happened.
It's like, we don't need that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's a weird thing to defend.
Like when people are defending it as like, oh, some art piece is like, eh, there's a limitation with art.
Yeah.
Not everything got to be art.
You know what I mean?
Okay, Al, what was this topic?
You want to talk?
So, all right, we're going to take a break for a second, save y'all some money.
You heard that?
We're out here trying to save y'all some money.
Akash, ain't nothing Akash loves more than saving money.
Shit makes my dick cardio.
Real time?
Chill out, bro.
I don't even see the hamster run out.
We're not trying to see that hamster run out, dog.
I love business.
I love good deals.
I hear you.
I hear you, my man.
So look, Policy Genius.
Okay, I think we've talked about Policy Genius to you guys before.
Basically, here's the deal.
Okay.
Policy Genius is going to take care of all of your insurance.
Okay.
They're going to bundle it so that you could save money.
How are you going to save money?
You're going to save up to $1,100.
Actually, a little bit more.
I rounded down.
That's fucked up with me.
Yeah.
That's fucked up with me.
I round it down.
It's $1,127 on average.
That's what they're saying.
But $1,27 is a big deal.
$1,127?
Shit.
Boy.
I fucked up.
That's my bad.
That's a lot.
That's my bad.
Anyway, point is you got to save your money.
Listen, what you're going to do, okay?
If you're thinking that you want to save that kind of money, this is what you're going to do.
You're just going to go to Policy Genius.
That's all you have to do.
Okay.
If you're thinking $1,127 is a weirdly specific amount, then you know what?
You're right.
Because they crunch the numbers and that's just what it is.
In fact, crunching numbers is one of the things that makes Policy Genius so amazing.
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After that, Policy Genius does all the work.
They'll compare your existing policy against others on the market to make sure you're getting the right coverage and the best possible price.
You see that?
It is one marketplace.
All the different insurances.
It can bring them together, get you the best thing.
I don't understand why you won't do this.
You're saving money if you do this.
If Policy Genius finds a better rate than what you're currently paying, they'll get you switched for free.
You don't have to do any work.
It's free.
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This is what I'm telling you.
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They've saved their home and auto insurance customers an average of $1,127 a year.
Let me tell you something.
Knows a weird specific amount that they could save you.
I think you should go save money.
Go talk to us, Arkansas.
Let me tell you something.
I try to give like sound financial advice to our listeners, not nonsense.
That's what I'm saying.
This is one of the biggest ways you could get God is insurance.
They inflate prices.
You don't know what's going on.
These guys simplify everything.
They can save you money and they'll switch for you.
It is, you have to do this.
Go to apologies.com right now.
Save money.
Let's get back to the show.
Okay, Al, what was this topic you want to talk about?
So, and we might need Taylor for this one.
So, I was hanging out with Weezy over the weekend.
Toilet Paper Wipe Fail00:06:47
She was blown away by the discovery that men don't pat their dick after we pee.
What do you mean, pat?
She, and then we quizzed about 10 other women who all thought the same thing think that men, after we pee, take toilet paper and dry off the tip of our dick.
No, because there's pee is still in there for a long time.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Why would we do such a thing?
Because that's what they do.
Yeah, they wipe their pussy.
Yeah, but sometimes you wipe your pussies too hard and a little piece of toilet paper balls up and it ends up in your pussy.
Did you think at all that men did that?
Did you think, like even before sex?
No, I didn't think so.
Oh, really?
Oh, you mean before sex?
Like right before sex.
We go to pee, and then do you think we dab it?
Let me ask you a question: Have you ever seen a urinal?
Yeah, have you ever seen a roll of toilet paper in front of it?
That blew their mind, bro.
They blew their minds.
Look at the bathroom.
The bathrooms that are designed for it.
We shake it up and dance.
They just don't care about y'all because y'all men.
I don't know.
I just didn't.
You don't think about our dicks a lot.
Yeah, like I don't think the wear a pair of sweatpants, all these girls passing around me.
He's like, oh, you got a hammer.
So now I heard that happens to other dudes.
What is that?
I heard that happens to other dudes sometimes.
Yo, you know, Arkas, when you wear this short, stop being bashful, son.
You muffined up right now.
We see you, bro.
Yo, I muffined up right now, bro.
Hey, that was that shit.
You are struggling, bro.
Let that shit breathe.
Let that money breathe.
Come on, son.
You got that hamster.
Come on, man.
Show it to the people.
You sound like a lab mouse.
No, your shit is a gerbil.
It needs to go right up in Richard Gere's asshole.
That's what it means.
Come on.
Be proud.
Akash always plays down his dick.
And this guy got the fucking piece, bro.
Be honest.
Be honest, bro.
Be honest.
Only one woman will know.
Sorry, Taylor.
I mean, wouldn't your mom know too?
Yeah, that's a good point.
Your mom.
You haven't seen me post-puberty naked.
Yeah, but your shit was probably, you know, equally as big for the time.
You probably had a big baby dick, bro.
I mean, you don't got a cuties reenacted, but I think you were probably pecking back in the day, bro.
You're fucking Cobra Kai, bro.
You think you might have had that?
You really might have had that fucking wang.
I don't think so.
I don't think so.
Well, it's no fun if you want to just be normal, dude.
Either pushback real hard or roll with it, dog.
Don't be objective about your dick size over here.
Fair enough.
We're trying to blow you up, bro.
We're trying to say they were just dragging your dick out of your mom like the clown shit.
That was the public.
Yeah.
Yeah.
They swaddled you and then your dick after.
And then they shipped off.
They almost cut your dick off thinking it was the afterbirth.
They almost cut off half of your dick.
They're like, nah, it's just an afterbirth.
And you were like, nah, whip that shit back.
Indiana Jones.
Indian Jones.
Yeah, Indian Jones.
You were Indian Jones back in the day, man.
You know what I mean?
Real talk, man.
Be proud of yourself.
Repeat after me.
I have pride.
I have pride.
I have power.
I have power.
I'm a badass mother.
I'm a badass mother.
That don't take no shit from nobody.
That don't take no shit from nobody.
What do you think about him?
Small running?
Damn right, bro.
Damn right, bro.
That's what I'm talking about.
Big dick sing.
Make these ladies sing with that big dick.
We're not playing games over here.
It's icons, bro.
It's motherfucking icons wearing shorts in fall.
Shit, Taylor.
You still high?
Yeah, right you are.
Okay, Al.
So this is the this is for all you ladies listening because we know we got a lot of ladies at lady assholes out there.
We do not dab our dicks.
We actually shake and jiggle our dicks.
Yeah.
I used to do a joke about this back in the day, but it is true as you get older, we have way less control of the urine in our dicks.
So you don't know about this yet, Mark.
But once you get to my ripe age, you pee, you stop peeing, you shake your dick like crazy, you put your dick in your pants, and then you start peeing again.
That's how it works.
So there's always a couple more drips after.
Oh, yeah.
I know the drips.
And so now the girls were outraged because they now know that all this time they have been drinking a little piss every time.
Oh, every time you give a guy a head, you drank a little pee.
Every time.
Every single time.
Grow up, ladies.
Grow up.
Put your mouth.
Go, go.
I didn't say call me when you grow up.
I said, girl.
Twist hand on me.
You got a couple drops of pee.
Big deal, brother.
Fuck up.
Yo, real talk.
When we go down on y'all.
Yep.
Keep going.
I followed it up with that.
Y'all just got a cavern.
Y'all got a cavern.
When you pee, you don't have a directional pee.
You ever seen a girl pee?
It just falls out of you.
Yeah.
Right?
It just falls out.
Oh, yo, that's right.
The pain is not direct.
You can't spell your name with no fucking pee if you're a girl.
You have no control.
Your pee.
Your pee just falls out.
Pop water balloon explosion.
That's all it is.
You cannot control that urine.
Okay.
That being said, it's going all over your puss.
And I know you try to wipe it with the toilet paper or wipe it with a tissue.
Half-ass attempt.
You think it's going to soak up in your panties.
Well, no.
Some of your pussies snatch clothes.
Not all your pussies open and welcome to the world.
Not all your pussies that outgoing.
Not all your pussies look like Jesus on the cross.
Some of your pussies are a little wrapped up.
Some of your pussies looking like Mother Mary.
Some of your pussies got the shawl over them for real.
They got the shawl.
They got an Afghan covered.
Some of your pussies Muslim.
Taylor, not going into yours.
That'd be disrespectful.
I'm just saying there are girls out there that their shits completely close.
They close up.
You didn't even know there was a pussy.
If in the dark, they might need to redirect your penis into it because you keep missing and banging on the lips.
Do you know what I'm saying?
Sometimes that might happen.
That they're so close and snap shut.
It's really a booby trap.
Have you ever seen that in the movies where they have the hole and then they cover it with some branches and they cover it with some leaves and then you're running, you don't realize it?
You fall right into it.
Yep.
That's your pussy.
Only you don't fall right into it.
You just smash around it until they grab your dick and insert for them.
Yep.
That's all I'm trying to say.
There is urine all up over them lips.
It's mad graphics.
What?
Yeah.
Like I'm watching cutie dicks.
The Booby Trap Penis00:08:42
Jesus.
Fuck you talking about Venus fly traps.
Why are y'all acting like you never stab some pussy and you miss?
Never.
Every time you push.
Wait, wait, go on.
Don't put that shit in for me, bro.
Oh, bro.
Come on.
Come on, dog.
Come on, homie.
Yo, you can stuff it in, homie.
Hey, player.
Hey, player.
Might you got me a little bit.
Play urine.
Grab hold of the wheel.
We getting lost over here.
That's when you got to put on the iPhone flashlight.
Hold up.
Like you dropped the headphone or some shit.
Trying to find that shit.
Hold on, say, that's stay there.
Breathe out real hard.
Breathe out real hard.
Open it up real quick.
Hold your nose and breathe out.
Yo, Taylor, is it true if you go like this, like that, that the pussy lips just open up?
Yeah.
Like one of those, like one of the New Year's things.
Is that true, Taylor?
You never, you never sneeze with your nose closing.
Your pussy just open up real quick and then snatch clothes.
Never once happened.
Happy New Year's.
You never happy New Year's?
You never happy New Year's.
The balls ever dropped.
Oh my God.
Oh, shit.
Anyway, what else we got, man?
Your flashlight's still on.
Oh, there you go.
I turned that shit off.
But thank you, my good sir.
What else we got, man?
What else are we talking about this week?
We got Disney threatens to pull out of Georgia's abortion bill.
Yo, this shit was mad.
This shit is so Martitis.
But how's it based on Mulan?
Yes.
Al got confused by the words pull out.
He said, What?
I don't understand this concept at all.
What could this be?
When I was describing the threshold shit to how he was.
Pull out an abortion go together?
I don't even.
What is happening?
Easy.
Oh, Mark.
Al, how does it feel when you pull out?
Do you feel like you fucked up?
Be honest.
What does it feel like?
You never pull it out?
Son.
I pull out all the time.
You do?
All the time.
All right.
God bless.
I didn't mean to be serious, Akash.
You know what I'm saying?
You been lifting, Akash?
I'll get fat, you know, Carl.
You feel it now?
You fucking.
I'm getting fat in this card.
You're not getting fat.
That dude, my fat.
The hamster, bro.
The hamster.
You got the hamster.
You got the hamster.
The hammy.
Oh, fuck.
Oh, shit.
Okay, okay, go, go, go.
All right.
So, basically, I saw some people criticizing Disney.
I didn't fact check it, so there's more feelings.
But basically, Disney was threatening Georgia after Georgia passed a controversial abortion bill banning certain abortions at a certain time.
I think it was abortions that were after.
I think it was the heartbeats.
I think it was the heartbeat bill.
What is the heartbeat?
I think like 24 days.
So I think.
Oh, yo, yo, yo.
I think.
I'm not positive.
Dumber.
How you even know you missed your period?
That's a good point.
Period is too much.
You just hear that shit.
You're laying in bed.
It's bo-boom.
Boom, boom.
Like, what the fuck is that?
That's too late.
Is there a hamster on?
It's too late.
You hearing them?
You feel the heartbeat, baby.
That is the thing, bro.
It's like you need to miss the period to know you're pregnant.
And you need to have a couple extra days because you know these girls can't count to 28.
Your period's already off.
Why is the girls can't get their period right every single month?
Oh, my period's late.
No, you can't count.
I could probably tell you when that shit is coming.
Say what?
I could probably tell you when that shit is coming.
When is it coming?
She'd be in an extra pain in the ass right now.
Baby, is it that time?
You must be at time.
We're getting yelled at a lot.
Does your girl really react differently around her period?
Nah, before.
PMS.
How did she?
She said it to me like I was a fucking retard, and I was like, oh, that's just marketing because then they get PMS.
Then they get MS. Yeah.
And then sometimes they get AMS.
What is AMS?
Afterward, they still crank you for a couple days.
Damn.
It's like a fucking honeymoon, dude.
Jeez.
Never ends.
You literally just got angry when you said that.
I already sat down.
I literally just got angry.
I want it to be that.
I want it to be that.
Harry Potter.
I tried to hurt you.
I'm going to throw a microphone at Mark.
I'm going to hurt Mark, bro.
He thinks he's married.
I'm going to hurt Mark.
I'm going to fucking hurt her.
I'm getting disgusting.
I'm getting physical, bro.
I'm going to start.
That's what I'm doing now that you're a fucking grown adult.
You're going to get physical, bro.
I'm getting physical, bro.
Mark!
Don't you take out a good work.
Mark!
Yo, this guy has changed, bro.
Remember how fucking kind and generous and sweet he was?
Yo, two months and four days.
Damn, now he's jaded.
He's amazing.
You didn't mark a gift?
I didn't get him nothing yet.
Oh, fuck.
You got him a gift.
My bad.
I didn't get him a gift.
No, we both planned to get you a gift when we got back.
No, I planned on giving you a dope gift, bro.
Bro, you digging me.
Nigga, Miss Honeymoon.
You give me a great gift.
You know what the gift is?
I paid you where you owe your fucking honeymoon.
That's the only thing that you're going to get.
Great gift.
It is a fucking good gift.
But I was about to ball out on this little motherfucker.
I sent you a bad girl.
I was about to ball out on this.
Yo, he made me step up my gift because I was like, he didn't say what he was going to give, but I was like, I know it's going to be wild.
So I was about to say, you know what?
I've Venmo'd this motherfucker from another.
Did he say something?
Nothing.
I just realized I ain't even going to thank you.
Hey, yo.
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Yo.
I legit was like, does this motherfucker not have Venmo?
I don't understand how.
Oh, I saw him like yesterday.
I forgot.
I'm sorry.
Oh, yeah.
Wait, Salada.
I'm going to use the eye card.
So later, you tell me what you did so I can do a little lesson.
Can I tell you one thing?
I knew at the wedding that he was supposed to tell me, but he knew about the thing, but he wasn't going to tell me.
I knew.
How?
The interaction.
Oh, I knew it.
You were hiding it.
I knew you were hiding it.
I knew it too.
Damn, why y'all bow me up?
I'm trying to get the blow your ass up.
So I'm sorry.
I'm going to be honest.
I knew it too.
I'm going to be honest.
I'm going to just give it a month with you.
All of us knew.
I'm sorry.
Not all of us.
So he comes to me at the wedding.
I felt so bad for him.
I felt so bad.
My bad, yo.
My bad.
My bad.
So he comes to me.
This is right after.
I don't know how to feel.
He actually right now.
But he was nervous because he actually FaceTimed me before his wedding to ask how he should approach it.
Wait.
And then before?
Oh, shit.
You knew no.
I knew.
Well, no, no.
I want to see how many lies he's talking.
I want to see how many lies.
When did he FaceTime you before?
Fuck all y'all.
Keeping me out of the loop.
I almost forgot to say fuck y'all.
I was just milking the moment.
I'm not trying to kill me right now.
A bunch of Benedict Arnolds.
All good.
Mine's different.
My different.
I didn't know he didn't take my ass.
He told me Saturday before his wedding.
What did I say?
I wished him.
I said, hey, man, congratulations.
I'm very happy for you.
FaceTime me.
And he was like, yo, first of all, does my beard look ridiculous or no?
And I lied and said it did not.
My man had a full Puerto Rican.
And then he was like, also, my hunger levels have reached the same as last week.
How do I tell Andrew?
And I was like, yo, you should just tell him to be straight up.
It's beautiful.
Andrew will celebrate love.
And this motherfucker, I find out Monday didn't tell you till he was flying out, but I didn't want to blow up his spit.
I texted him.
So if I would have come to work ready with my pen and paper, it wouldn't have been.
First day of school?
I would have known.
Alexander.
And I would have been here by myself.
Mark.
Fuck you.
Fuck you.
And don't fuck you.
But did you know, Taylor, right off the fucking set?
A walk off of it.
I did tell Taylor.
Nah, nah, nah.
So I didn't fully know.
He didn't tell me.
I'm lying.
Oh, my God.
Thank God.
At least I have one fucking homeboy.
Oh, no.
He didn't tell me either.
All right, go.
You said he did call me about an horrible ass lineup, though.
So he just came.
I'm saying real estate price is dropping.
You know what I'm saying?
You know what I'm saying?
Everybody take advantage.
Everybody take advantage.
I don't have to worry about Mark's morality ever again.
Go on.
Garbage human being.
So he just came up to me at the ceremony after.
Like the dancing part, whatever that part.
Reception.
Yeah, there you go.
I'm going to bet you weddings.
Fuck you.
So, and he's like, damn, do you know if I could maybe stay a couple more days?
And I was like, I mean, it's your wedding, just like asked Drew.
And he's like, yeah, yeah, I'm going to.
And that was it.
This was right after he told me.
Chinese Concentration Camps00:04:15
I'll be honest with you.
If you had just asked me, I would have said no.
Yeah, yeah.
So you did the right thing.
I know.
You did the right thing.
Andrews, one of his big sayings is: it's better to ask forgiveness than permission.
But he didn't do neither.
Do you forgive me?
He motherfucker didn't do neither.
I had to ask him.
Well, that's what people don't realize about that quote.
There's a third option.
Okay, what is it?
Do nothing.
Do nothing.
And that's what I did.
But hang out at the beach.
The beach right by your house.
Like, it's a beach you've been to.
That ain't a honeymoon.
That's my point.
It's not a honeymoon.
Thank you.
Motherfucker, this workforce.
Not even a honeymoon.
Just a moon.
Don't support that.
Don't support that.
I'm going a long ass honeymoon too.
God, right on the block.
You see what you started?
Right around Long Island City.
I will get married and divorced just for the honeymoon.
No, you're gonna start coming in late, bro.
I'm on my honeymoon right now, bro.
We're having a little honeyburn.
Let me finish my honey brunch and I'll meet you in there.
We gotta do the honey brunch.
Son, it's unbelievable.
Give me, if you okay, so back to Disney, right?
You fucks.
Okay, so Disney is like, yo, we're pulling out of Georgia.
Right.
So it's pulling out that we got into this movie.
Yeah, that's right.
Piece of shit, Mark.
Piece of garbage.
Yo, he pulled out of a week of work.
Mark, Mark, I swear to God.
Okay, so they go, yo, we're pulling out if you guys keep this bill going, right?
Because they're taking a moral high ground, you know, as most companies do because corporations are super woke and there's in no way any hypocrisy attached to a corporation and their activism.
They really are truly about that lie.
So they also happen to be making this movie, Mulan.
Are you familiar with Mulan?
I am familiar with the cartoon Mulan.
Yes.
It's like Chinese Joan of Arc.
Yes.
Right?
Does she pretend to be a guy too?
Yep.
Yep.
Really?
Yeah.
Easier for her.
Slightly.
Okay.
So.
Back to Muran.
Back to Muran.
What?
What did I do?
I didn't do anything.
All right.
Well, you guys heard.
So back to it.
So they are making this movie.
Now, Mark, where are they making this movie?
It's a live-action version of the cartoon.
Where are they making it?
Certain scenes were filmed in China.
They're filming China.
Interesting.
And where in China?
Maybe the Shinzhu region?
Yep.
And now the Shinzhu region, I don't know if you're familiar with it.
I'm unfamiliar.
Okay.
Gosh, well, let me just tell you because I was completely unfamiliar too.
Okay.
And I'm sure Disney had no clue.
They're not making this movie by any way to pander to the Chinese movie market, which is a huge movie market now.
No way are they doing that.
They're just recreating movies that they really like.
Care about absolutely.
100%.
No dollar signs attached to this.
None.
Just doing the right thing.
Well, Shinzu is home to a group of Chinese Muslims called the Uyghurs.
Oh, have you heard of them?
I have heard of them.
Well, you got to hear about them now because they're going extinct.
Okay.
China's getting rid of them.
Okay.
Adios, putting them in concentration camps.
Can you imagine the levels of concentration coming out of a Chinese music?
Oh, concentration camps.
Bro, Taylor.
See how distracted you are right now because you're high.
Listen, you need to concentrate because it's a choice.
There are some parts of the world where you got to concentrate.
Because you're Chinese.
Because you're Chinese, man.
Real talk.
They got them in concentration camps.
Wild.
I know.
Ripping them off the streets.
Moving their religion, removing their rights.
How could they possibly film a movie in a place where people's rights are being stripped and their lives taken away and their freedom behind it?
I'm sure they didn't know.
This probably isn't a movie, like a news story that anybody knows about.
You're right.
It was probably super nuanced or something like that.
Very nuanced.
You know, I hear you.
Yeah, I'm sure the news hides this kind of thing.
Yeah.
You know what?
You're probably right.
You're probably right about that.
Shocking Corporate Actions00:04:24
But it is shocking that a corporation would do this.
It is shocking.
Absolutely shocking.
I personally always have good faith in corporations.
Yo, I mean, they're moral people.
Moral.
Their bottom line is to morality and activism, not to their shareholders.
Absolutely.
Right?
Absolutely.
Kind of.
Absolutely.
Are we losing the game?
No, no.
Are we locked in the game?
What is it?
That responsibility?
What does it say?
The corporations' responsibility is always to the shareholder.
Yes.
Or something like that.
That's what I was talking about.
Obviously, we're being sarcastic, and this is once again, absolutely ridiculous.
And these fucking celebs are absolutely ridiculous.
Performative wokeness.
Same thing's happening in Hollywood right now.
Did you see like the new requirements to have like an Oscar?
The new requirements to have an Emmy.
You have to do this.
It has to be super diverse cast and all this other kind of shit.
What I don't understand is why the performative action because people will still support you.
You just got to appease.
People will give you money.
But if people aren't watching the woke shit, right?
Why continue to make it?
That I don't get.
And that's what always bothered me about it: I can understand its show business.
That's what we're always told.
Yes.
But when the business isn't productive being woke, then you should change your business.
That's what I don't understand.
Daily show ratings have been dog shit since Jon Stewart left.
Right.
But you keep this show afloat, even though it does bad business with its performative, super left wokeness.
Yeah.
It's bad for business.
Why are you letting it do this?
Why is this your anchor show for this network?
Do you think that they're so like locked in their bubble in Hollywood that they don't realize the rest of the world hates them?
I do think that about actors, but the people funding the media.
Can I say one thing, bro?
I can't say the guy's name because I got to look out for my dude.
Not my dude.
I don't know him.
But I have actors hit me up.
Yeah.
Complaining about this kind of shit.
Right?
They can't say anything publicly because they're working within that sphere.
But they're like, this is all right, guys.
We're going to take a break for a second.
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Let's get back to the show.
I have actors hit me up.
Yeah.
Complaining about this kind of shit.
Right?
They can't say anything publicly because they're working within that sphere.
But they're like, this is absolute bullshit.
We can't believe it.
Like actors that you would know, right?
Not like guys who can't get work.
You got to tell me off the podcast.
Off the podcast.
I'll tell you.
And I would say it, but I don't want to disrespect my team.
And you don't snitch on anybody.
Right.
But they're calling out how stupid it is.
And I'm just like, yo, what is the deal?
Why are they doing this performative shit?
If you're a government, I understand you can do performative acts to better the lives of certain groups of people because you don't have to rely on making money.
But if you're a business, you have to make money.
Now that these things are not making money, eventually you're going to run out of money.
Eventually, you're going to have to make some shit that people want to consume.
And I keep waiting for that tipping point.
When the fuck is going to happen?
I don't get it.
I don't get it.
It's mind-boggling to me.
I mean, we keep benefiting from their stupidity because people keep finding us.
I love it.
But I just don't from a business standpoint.
I'm like, what are y'all doing?
I understand show business.
This is bad business.
Now, I will say, though, like, I think there's a subset.
If you wanted to make a movie about some disability shit, because you're like, oh, no one looked like me.
And you're able to help someone and you want to do it.
It's like an art project.
Then, yeah, go do it.
But to try to create some sort of legislation or like.
If it's authentic, I'm with it.
Yeah, exactly.
What are you talking about with disability?
What do you mean?
Olympic Executive Diversity00:07:24
Like, I was talking to this, I was talking to my sister who works with this kid who doesn't have an arm.
Okay.
And he was like, oh, when I was a kid, there was this movie about a kid that didn't have an arm and I liked it.
Yes.
Even though the movie wasn't that successful, it was just a movie about a kid that had an arm.
He's like, oh, yeah, it's like me.
It felt good.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like when you said with Aladdin, you're like, it was cool to see someone that kind of looked like you.
Close enough.
That's how I felt with Jason Williams.
Yeah.
People think white people don't have that feeling, but like the basketball player, Jason Williams, I was like, oh, sick.
There's a guy who plays basketball in a way.
I kind of play basketball.
So it was cool to see.
Everybody has that feeling.
Everybody wants a rape.
I think that we get lost in this idea where like since white people are like the executive roles in a lot of these companies, I think that like maybe, I can't speak for you, but maybe minorities think that like we get excited by that.
No.
White people aren't going, yeah, we're the refs.
Yeah, that's my favorite ref.
I feel representative.
No, there are definitely.
Yeah, that's the owner.
There are definitely arenas where white people are like, oh, shit, it's cool to see this.
But like, it's different when like you never saw this.
100%.
So that's what we're saying.
You guys definitely go through it, though.
I understand.
I think everybody goes through it when you like an industry that doesn't have someone that's kind of like you in it.
Eminem meant something to a lot of people.
So many white people say he's the greatest rapper ever.
He's great.
But they cling to greatest ever because that's their guy.
This is finally, I've been listening to this music my whole life.
Finally, a guy that looks like me in this field that's good.
Yes.
That's good.
Yes.
So, and great.
He's great.
Like, that's the guy.
That's our guy.
Everybody does it.
Yeah.
You feel some like, I don't know.
Is it more entitlement?
Do you feel like you're not?
You feel like you belong.
Like, it's seeing a brown person on in American movies and stuff.
I was always like, holy shit, that means something to me.
That's me.
You know what's dope about Olympics for that reason?
Is that like when you watch the Olympics, you get to take part in that person's success as an American?
Yeah.
Like within the country, we're all chopped up into these little teams and groups, right?
You're Indian, you know, like I'm white.
Alex is black, but Latino, like Mark is Catholic.
And like, maybe when a Catholic does something cool, you know what I mean?
Maybe, I don't know.
I don't know if you're a kid.
In bubbles, they talk about that shit.
They do?
Yeah.
They'll be like, oh, yeah, like this Catholic guy.
Or like they used to talk about the Supreme Court.
There's a ton of Catholics in the Supreme Court.
They're like, look at us.
Oh, because Scalia was Catholic.
Yeah, exactly.
They talk about Catholic schools.
Boom.
So there's like this cool, like, I guess a little tribalism.
Everybody gets in their tribe, right?
Taylor, you might see a black woman do something that you represent or like you respect and you're like, oh, that kind of represents me.
That's dope, right?
But the cool thing about the Olympics is it's kind of similar to war, which is like when you're competing against other bigger tribes, we all put our shit out.
All our differences fade.
Right.
And we're just like, all right, is he nice?
Yeah.
Is he the fastest?
I don't care.
He's Asian.
He's Indian.
He's black.
He's white, whatever.
Just put him out there.
Meritocracy.
We didn't know who Apollo Ono was.
Remember that guy who was a speed skater?
Michael Phelps.
He was.
Michael Phelps' goofy ass.
Look like me.
You ever make fun of somebody the way they look and then people start saying you look like them?
Yes, exactly.
And you feel fucking humiliated.
Yeah, that guy's mouth doesn't close.
How does he swim?
The guy has a hole in the boat.
And it's just swimming.
It's unbelievable.
So, but it's just a cool thing about the Olympics, man.
It's like for a second, we get to take back and we get to all have pride in what was created.
And I think the reason why it's okay to do that is because like it came, we came up within the American system.
You know, it's like there was that time where it was the World Cup.
I think France won the World Cup, right?
And there was all this conversation like, yeah, but it won with all African guys, right?
But yes, maybe that their DNA, their genes were African, but you have to credit the French system that they came up under and that taught them and the tutelage and the training and all these things that they didn't get in those African countries.
And if the French people celebrate them, that's a huge win for diversity in France.
Everybody should want that.
You should want people that don't look like they're from that country to do to excel.
So then they feel more accepted in that country.
Yeah, probably.
Don't say this is Africa winning.
If you're French, don't do that.
Because why would they embrace France?
Yeah.
And also on the other side, and also don't allow someone to remove your patriotism from you.
I don't like that.
Like you are entitled.
You can't say we want the rights and respect that we are deserved as citizens of this country and have a goal to reject the country.
Does that make sense?
Like you should be allowed to be patriotic and not call the sellout for that, but embrace for that.
And then when the arrangement, when the deal that all of us as citizens with the country is not met by the country, then we hold the country accountable.
Yeah.
Well said.
But you do not have to sell your patriotism or like give up your patriotism.
Like it's a beautiful fucking thing.
Right.
And it's something I noticed when I'm watching football this weekend where I'm seeing all these guys, some of them kneeling, some of them standing, all holding hands and all this other stuff.
And I'm like, yo, did we actually come to a really cool conclusion here?
Like, did we come to a place?
And I'm not talking about like the performative shit the NFL did.
I'm literally talking about the players standing next to each other, some holding hands, some of them hands of a heart, some of them kneeling, and they're all together.
And it's like, oh, we just realized that you could treat different things.
You could treat the same thing in different ways and it can all be respectful.
Yeah.
It took us four years and blackballing Kaepernick.
But we got to what I think is a pretty cool place.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So I think representation is important in that way.
However, what makes the Academy Awards thing or the Oscar thing where they say you have to have certain things frustrating is that it seems like they are like requiring or like forcing representation.
I feel like you're taking pity on me personally when you do that.
And it's like, I don't want that.
How about this though, Makash?
How about this?
Instead of making the requirement for the movie that the actors have to be a certain whatever, why stop at actors?
The producers of the studio have to have diversity on their boards because what is it, 90?
We did it when we did a piece of 98% of executives in the studios in Hollywood for different studio companies.
I'm talking about the studio is the company that makes the actual movies.
There's no black presidents except Spike Lee.
I think Spike Lee was the only one.
And he made his own company of his own.
I mean Tyler Perry, I imagine, has a studio as well, but he made his own.
So there's no black presidents of any of these companies.
So why don't you put that performative racism, sorry, performative activism to task on yourself?
Because they don't care about activism.
They care about money.
No, no, no, it's not money, Akash.
It's protecting their little boy band.
Exactly.
So what I think that they're doing is going, if we put diversity in these little roles that are replaceable that we don't care about, we can keep hiring our friends to have this little boys club going on.
Yeah, I agree.
Just to be accurate, they do have other standards.
It's standard B that has creative leadership and in the project team.
And then they also have another standard C, industry access and opportunities.
So it's not just actors and in front screen people.
It's like more access for the executive board.
Like I want the executive board because with the highest, highest level, like the real change makers.
And it seems to me that it's all performative activism to protect their shit, right?
It's like, oh, yeah, yeah, let the athletes be the ones that are sponsoring, that we're sponsoring, and let them be the face of the company, but don't put them on the board.
Yep.
Al, you're a black.
That I am.
Speak for all black.
Speak for every one of them.
Nah, whoa.
Seriously, though.
Pyramid Scheme Rami00:15:22
Like, what do you feel when you see this?
And the same thing with Farakash.
It's like, you guys benefit from these measures.
So I'm sure on some part you're like, well, this is dope because I get a piece of the pie.
And on the other part, you're like, well, you don't have to pity me.
I could get mine.
Like, you guys are guys that are hustlers.
So I'm curious what your well, I mean, it's for minorities, women, LDGs.
Women got snuck into this.
They got snug into it as well.
So it's like basically women.
Everybody non-white women.
Don't talk about my queens, bro.
Don't talk about my queens, bro.
When Nubian queens, bro, my bad.
Taylor, just stop being high all this time.
Yeah, she slaps right out of it.
Step right out of it.
You ruined her high, yo.
It's all good, bro.
We got all different types of Nubian queens.
What does Nubian even mean?
Brown.
I think it means all lives matter.
Is it?
Is that Swahili translated?
I thought that was a Swahili translation.
This is Nubian.
Real talk.
That's what's up, man.
I thought it's like when you just turned lesbian.
She can shoot me, bro.
Y'all can shoot me.
Oh, she did, bro.
No, you're a Nubian.
Taylor should shoot her.
You're a lesbian.
You're a Nubian.
It's ancient Egypt.
White people.
What?
Yeah.
What?
You don't think white people.
So?
It's funny.
Wait a minute.
You don't think white people built the pyramids, bro?
No.
White people wouldn't build the pyramids.
Why would they build them like that?
It's not white people that did it.
Yes, it did.
White people built the pyramids.
They came down from the Caucasus Mountains.
Yeah.
Yo, white people love pyramids.
It's our favorite thing.
$10,000 pyramid.
Just a game we used to play.
The schemes, the schemes.
Pyramid schemes.
We love pyramids.
It's true.
You ever see what a diamond looks like upside down?
You ever see what a diamond looks like upside down?
What is it?
A pyramid.
Pyramid.
Yo, what's on the dollar bill?
Pyramid.
I'm seeing what you mean because I'm high.
I'm just saying.
White people built the pyramids.
It's the whitest shit to do.
Just build something for nothing.
Yeah.
I see what you mean.
That's it.
I was laughing, you see.
We built sandcastles on the beach.
White people.
They be building shit.
Not be building shit for no reason.
Black people build all of this shit.
So don't do that.
Black people build.
Okay.
That's not, I'm not saying y'all don't build.
Y'all build.
But Mexicans build.
That's real talk.
Let's be honest, bro.
That's a fact.
If you need some shit built, are you going to Jamal or Javier?
Both of them could be, I don't know.
I'm not.
Nope.
Yeah.
Yeah, okay.
Okay.
If you need some soul food cooked, who you going for?
Jamal's mom or Javier's mom?
Keep it real.
Keep it 100.
Keep it 100.
I'm not playing this game.
If you needed a pyramid built, if you needed a pyramid built, who would you go to?
I'm not.
You gonna go to some Egyptians?
I'm not playing this game.
Yes.
Why?
Because they live there.
They haven't built nothing since.
What does that mean?
They live there.
Yeah.
I live in places I can't build shit.
Thank you.
You know what I mean?
Exactly, Taylor.
Dude, Rami look like he can build some pyramids.
Romi not building nothing.
Who?
Rami.
You don't even know Egyptian kings, yo.
Yeah, he's a real Egyptian king right now.
What's another guy, Malik?
He's Rami too.
It's only Rami's coming out of Egypt.
Rami Rami and Rami Malik.
Both Egyptian.
Can't even lift the bar.
You don't even put no weights on the side of that shit.
Come on now.
Rami would make a great documentary about the BBC.
You could document building those pyramids beautifully.
Fucking gorgeous.
The significance.
Have some great lighting.
A questionable beard.
Shout out to Rami, yo.
We love you, dog.
We love you, Rami.
Come on the podcast.
Yeah.
When Hulu allows it.
When Hulu frees you.
Free Rami, y'all.
After Emmy season, come on.
Yeah, after Emmy season, pull up.
You can't be associated with us if you want them awards.
That's true.
If you don't win the Emmy, now that they've restructured it so only you could win the fucking Emmy.
If you don't win this Emmy, bro, this is going to be unbelievable.
Embarrassing.
It's going to be embarrassing.
Yo, does it count less if you win an Academy Award now?
As a minority?
Does it count less?
You know how like an Asian's GPA counts less because we expect Asians to do so well?
At least Harvard does that?
Yeah, Indian 4.0 is like a white people.
Hey, hey, watch your fucking mouth.
You might be right, but watch him out.
But that's true.
An Asian 1600 on the SATs, whatever, yo.
It's not worth as much as a white 1,500, probably.
That's white privilege.
Back to the Academy Award thing.
I do like the fact that they're finally doing something about representation there because when you look at any one of those awards, the whole shit is white.
Like the majority of most of the winners, the majority of the people there in the audience are white.
It's just gay, bro.
The whole thing is a fucking sham, dog.
I don't care about that shit.
I understand all that.
I'm just saying.
I'm just saying.
But all these, like, I always see people be upset, but they don't win at an Oscar.
They don't win like an Emmy.
You see these like rappers who like literally create the culture, dictate culture.
They create the whole way that people are dressing, acting, vernacular people are using.
And then some white stiff that's 70 years old doesn't say, I like your album, and they have a freak out over it.
Who the fuck cares?
You would never give a fuck about that white guy's opinion at any other point.
Especially in music, I don't know who has any Grammys.
It helps them get paid more.
I got no fucking clue.
I love that when they did the sippy cup shit.
Yo, but it helps him get paid more.
Jay-Z was like, oh, we got a sippy cup for blue.
If you're an Academy Award winner, you get paid more.
Now, if you're an Academy Award minute, you're broke afterwards.
No, you get paid more.
Hillary Swank.
What are you?
I don't know.
There is a thing that happens where a lot of people win Academy Awards and then their careers don't do anything because the movies that end up winning are these like artsy goofy shits that nobody really gives a fuck or watches.
Even Jamie Fox after Ray, I don't remember him popping like crazy movie after movie after movie.
But I'm pretty sure you can demand more after you're an academy.
Jimmy, I'd rather be an Independence Day than the artist.
100%.
Any day of the week.
Blockbuster, bro.
Transformers, dog.
I don't need to be in the forest.
I just list the water.
What's the mysterious fucking C we got?
I hate the fact that it's forced, but I just like that they're trying to do something.
Yeah, you like the fake effort behind it.
I like the effort behind it.
I just like that it's forced effort.
Sorry, I like that.
Sorry to cut you, but you really want black stories to be told, a different minority stories to be told, then put the people that are green lighting those stories, put people of those minorities in position to green light those stories.
Yeah, I'd agree with that too.
So then just change up at the top.
It's trickled down with this shit.
Oh, you put black people.
But that's what I'm saying.
They haven't done either.
So the fact that they're trying to get a better place to get away from it.
You'll take a half measure over no measure.
Yeah, that's fair.
I hear you.
That's all.
That's the wrong measure.
Who's the, what's the blackest channel on network television right now?
Most likely BET.
ABC, right?
Network.
I'm saying network network.
Obviously BET.
But probably BET, right?
Or no, probably ABC, right?
President of ABC?
Black woman.
Black woman.
That's all it is, bro.
You put the people of those races in positions of power to green light their stories.
They will green light those stories.
But if you don't change that, all this shit down here, performative, it's cute.
People can get some money, but it's not going to be long-term change.
And to her credit, probably the only shows on network TV that are doing well right now.
Ish.
That's all them issues is killing.
All them ishes are killing, bro.
They had to get away with murder.
They had another scandal.
Shonda.
Shonda.
Shonda let them know what was capable, I think, was possible.
Nah, but real talk.
Talking about like performative measures.
Did you see that performance that was done this past weekend on that podcast?
Oh, when we got the one-hour special about it.
Yeah, we got a one-hour special, bro.
It was a performance.
It was a performance, all right.
Shout out to the Joe Budden podcast for doing a one-hour special on us, man.
We appreciate the time.
I wish we didn't get so under his skin.
I understand, you know, the 250 million thing really got to him.
Yeah, that wasn't the intention.
I'm on record during that clip.
I said, I think this is a good idea.
Yeah, it was a good idea.
I said, I don't think it's crazy to ask for 250 million.
Then it turns out he didn't ask for 250 million.
I mean, I think he did ask for 250 million.
I would support that.
I wouldn't support that horrible ass contract he signed with Spotify.
Well, that's the thing.
I think that, you know, Joe's got to realize that he's horrible at business.
And that in order for him to get better at business, he's got to realize it.
Like, my man, here's the thing with Joe, right?
It's like, is it ever anybody else's fault?
Is it ever not Joe's fault?
The last 10 years or 15 years, how long we known Joe?
Joe's, what, 60 years old?
How old's Joe, right?
Dying his beard and shit like that with his stupid dye beard and his fucking disgusting thumb.
Tuck your thumb in.
That guy got to tuck his fucking thumb.
Dude, look at his uncircumcised thumb.
Can you Google Joe Budden's thumb?
What's his thumb?
What's up?
Dude, his thumb is disgusting.
He's got some weird shit with his thumb.
I noticed it when he came into Brilliant Idiots.
I'll fucking puke if I look at the picture of it, but it's gross.
It's uncircumcised.
You see it?
It's repulsive, dude.
Dude, it looks like he's been sucking on it because he ran out of dog's dicks to suck.
Real talk.
No, he's not fuck dogs.
He just jerks them off.
He just jerks them off.
My bad, my bad, my bad.
But in all seriousness, in all seriousness, too, you know, dog jerking Joe.
We got to talk about dog jerking Joe.
Dog jerking Joe has no business acumen.
He signs horrible deals after horrible deals.
You can't sign.
You can't complain about the deals that you've gotten for 10 years straight and then go, I'm good at signing deals.
Like, that's all we hear is, oh, complex, fuck me.
Oh, Spotify, fuck me.
Oh, everything for all these record labels, fuck me.
Everybody, fuck me.
It's if everybody's fucking you, maybe it's you.
You're the Taylor Swift of Hip Hop.
Everybody else's fault.
You're a victim every time.
Stop whining.
The guy just crying on the podcast.
I think he was emotional.
I think he might have cried because I saw some of his beard leak.
Some of the beard dye got on his shirt.
I literally think that's why he always wears all black because the beard dyes are rubbing all over his shit.
Wear a white shirt.
You know, I was watching and I was thinking, I was like, why is Joe spending an hour and five minutes on us?
It's too much, Joe.
Five minutes on us.
Here's what I realized.
You know, I've been to therapy for years.
You know, I realized when somebody's that mad at you, they're not mad at you.
They're mad at themselves.
Oh, do you think maybe we hit a chord?
I think Joe is mad at himself because he knows he signed a bad Spotify deal.
And then anytime you sign a bad deal, there's two parties' fault.
One, the people who set forth the exploitative terms.
Two, the person who signed the contract.
Joe was both.
He says, I set forth the Spotify terms.
Then he says I outperformed those terms in a week.
Yo, that's on you, buddy.
Why do you set those terms forth?
I want to help Joe.
I like Joe Button.
I think he's great.
I just think, and I think he was a little triggered that I'm Indian because he's from Jersey.
And if you're in Jersey, you cannot spend a dollar without it going to an industry.
Yo, don't be upset, Joe.
Yo, Dunkin' the Huts is body in you every time.
You want something to drink?
We own the Dunkin' Donuts.
You want something to eat?
We on the subject.
You want your ass in your beautiful car.
You know who that money going to.
You can't even put a side bitch in a hotel without giving money to some Gudrothy motherfucker.
Shout out to the Indians, bro.
Exactly.
I didn't understand it was an emotional thing.
That's how I realized it's not about me or Indians or whatever.
Cause that's his big insult.
Indian.
It is, he's looking at us like these bad-built, short, no-social etiquette having motherfuckers smell bad a lot of times.
How are they so good at business?
And me, Joe Button, King Charisma, fucking brilliant dude.
How am I so stupid in business?
It's impressive that he could be that entertaining and that retarded when it comes to business.
Because I want to help Joe.
Joe, I'm here.
Holler at me if you want to negotiate.
That's what we're good at as Indians negotiating.
Yes.
I'm your guy, bro.
I'll tutor you.
We're good at tutoring too.
Yeah.
I agree.
I got you, dog.
I will help you.
It's not going to be free because that's your first lesson.
It's when you see me fighting for every possible dollar on the table, you will realize that's what you should have done with Spotify.
That's so true, man.
I got you, Joe Joe.
Yo, but let me ask you a question.
Like, let's say you were going to do a deal, right, with Dog Jerk and Joe, right?
Right.
And you were going to do this deal with Dog Jerk and Joe.
And then, and then it was with Spotify.
Right.
Dog Jerk and Joe, he was, you know, he said, I want $250 million in a litter of French bulldogs.
And he said, he goes, I just want that.
That's all I want in the deal.
Right.
Now, would you have told him initially for the first deal, you know, the first time he got abused by weird that he's getting abused.
You are probably going to say, listen, if you're so confident that you're going to build up this platform, Spotify, what would you ask for in that deal?
If you know that you being there is going to build up the platform, what would you ask for?
Equity.
Oh, equity?
Equity?
Some ownership?
That'd be the smart thing to do.
Now, what if Spotify said no?
Spotify is a publicly traded company.
If you were a smart businessman, what would you do if you were betting on yourself?
Shares?
You might buy your own shares of the company that you were going to build up.
Did he do either, though?
Come on, Joe.
I mean, this is just simple business shit, right?
It's simple business.
The fact is, Joe does not have any business savvy whatsoever.
He's a brilliant business.
No, no, no.
What he has is brand savvy.
That guy knows how to build a brand, but he doesn't have a business.
There's different when you have a brand in a business.
And again, we'll just do this.
Is like, we'll give a little freak tip to Joe because we know he's listening.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
You spent a fucking hour on this last time.
You listened to every single word.
So what we'll say is there's a difference between.
I wish he spent as much time looking over that contract as he did talking about a real podcast.
Yeah.
That would have been a smarter move.
Yes, yes, yes, yes.
But when he's desperate, he signs anything.
That's why he keeps fucking himself.
Which he's about to do now with his new deal.
If he does do a new deal, Mr. Independent, who always has a deal?
That's weird.
Anyway, we'll tell you about independence in a second, but I digress because we're independent over here.
But that's fine.
Anyway, point is: if you have a mature business, you could walk away from it.
You know, Dunkin' Donuts, can you walk away from it?
Walk away.
If you have a gas station, can you walk away from it?
If you have maybe, say, a podcast network, could you walk away from it?
If you have a podcast that's called the Joe Button Podcast and it's just you, can you walk away and people listen?
That's a tough one.
He did walk away on his last podcast.
Did he walk away?
Did he get so emotional?
I think so.
Or did he walk away because of this deal?
That's another thing.
How you got emotional?
You're 60.
What are these emotions coming from?
Have your shit corrected already, bro.
That's probably why my shirt made your eyes blurry because you're fucking 60, bro.
It's called Nectan Regeneration.
All right.
Point is, point is, look, we don't want to spend too much time on this, but point is, there's things that you could do better.
So I would like to extend an olive branch to Joe, right?
I think if Joe wants to be really independent, because we're over here independent, right?
And what I mean by that is like we own everything.
We own our podcast.
And we went and did a Patreon that you guys can subscribe to if you'd like to.
We do an extra episode every single week that we also own on Patreon and you could pay $5.
And Joe could have done that instead of going to Spotify and giving all that money to somebody else and sign a horrible deal.
Joe Rogan's Power Seats00:11:50
If he had any business savvy, he would have done that because he has an incredibly loyal fan base that fucks with him and would do a Patreon.
His fan base is great.
But because he doesn't, we're a way more profitable podcast than him.
I know the numbers.
I know the numbers.
I hear the numbers.
I speak to all the same people that they speak to, and they talk about Joe like he's a clown.
It's sad, it's really sad.
It's sad, dude.
I want to help.
I'm sad.
Dude, I think Joe is so talented.
Let me not.
I don't as a rapper.
He has a personality.
Right, right, right.
He's so talented.
Right, right, right.
I just think he needs some business guidance.
That's it.
He needs a little business guidance.
You need an Indian in your camp.
He definitely does.
There's a lot of white dudes in this camp.
I think he needs an Indian.
Yes.
Because I recognize that.
You know what I'm saying?
If we're going to build this, I need to have my guy who understands business with me.
That's why we are the biggest Patreon of any comedy podcast on the planet.
So that's just what it is.
And when we're doing deals, I'm in that motherfucker.
This guy is crazy how much I fight for it.
It's beautiful.
Hey, man, let me know.
You got to know how to fight.
You got to know how to fight.
You got to know how to go for it.
So look, this is what I'm going to offer.
I have an advertising agency, right?
That's called a business.
Then you, do you work for it or do you own?
Oh, I own.
Oh, I own advertising.
Okay, gotcha.
Right.
Which services obviously are podcasts, but also some of your favorite podcasts.
When I say your, I don't mean your Arkash.
I mean you, Joe, but you don't know that because I don't need to brag about all my shit behind the scenes, but it is what it is.
So this is what I'm doing.
I'm going to offer you this.
If you really want to go independent, if you got the balls to really go independent, not sign up for another daddy, but if you really want to go independent, like you say, I will partner with you on the advertising.
We will bring advertisements, which you will get a percentage of, okay?
You eat what you hunt.
You eat what you hunt.
We will get you the advertisements.
You will eat what you hunt.
By the way, my partners are a black dude and a Mexican dude.
So if you want to support black and brown business, you can obviously do that over here.
Or you could sign up to one of the other white-owned companies if you want to do that.
But if you would like to be partners in it, I will, again, get you those ads.
And then you will get what you eat, whatever you hunt.
If your show grows, you get more money.
If your show does worse, you get less money.
It's up to you.
You bet on yourself.
That's all I can.
And I will give you the most competitive offer.
The same one that I give Brilliant Idiots.
How about that?
Oh, wow.
How about that?
That's how much I believe in y'all.
That's nice of you.
That's nice of me, ain't it?
Wow.
I'm just kidding.
I don't want your bum ass pocket.
What that shit, bro.
All right, guys, we're going to take a break for a second, pay some bills.
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Okay.
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Get your sizes down.
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Let's get back to the show.
All right.
Let's get off this topic.
Let's talk about a podcast by a guy named Joe that actually matters.
Okay.
It's weirdly at Spotify.
Not that much money left for the other Joe's when you got the regular Joe's.
Yeah, the regular Joe's ain't got no more money left when you got the real Joe in the building.
So Joe said on his podcast, this is Joe Rogan, obviously, we're talking about.
Joe said on his podcast, Rogan, that he would moderate a four-hour debate between Biden and Trump.
And Trump retweets, I do.
He's saying he's in.
Yo, you know what this proves?
What's that?
This is a podcast that is powerful.
Which podcast?
Joe Rogan.
Oh, Joe Rogan is a culturally significant, countrywide, significant podcast that can literally dictate where an election goes.
Joe Rogan's podcast changes the world.
That's fucking mind-blowing.
If you want to tell me your podcast is powerful and influential, that's the type of shit that to me is like, whoa, that's power and influence.
That's worth $300 million.
I'm sorry to go back to the jump, but my favorite part of the interview was making fun of us and he goes, who are these guys in these seats as he shared a couch with another man?
He's got his fucking thigh rubbing up another guy's thigh.
Why would men sit in different seats as a podcast?
Why not rub your thigh against your best friend?
That's what I'm saying.
He's mad at himself.
He knows he can afford fucking chairs.
He's mad at himself.
That's why I'm sharing a couch with these dudes.
Who are these guys in these seats talking about me?
I'm going to buy y'all some seats, yo.
Where should I send his seats?
Real talk.
Hey, real talk.
Send me a thing.
What's his name?
The guy whose house they recorded at.
Parks.
Barks.
Barks.
I'm going to send you to.
Where is it?
Oh, I'm going to send y'all some seats.
Okay.
Y'all can pick out some seats.
Actually, I won't send him.
You can get some used ones.
Maybe you can send a letter.
Why don't y'all pick out some used seats?
And I'll send it your way.
Y'all deserve it.
Y'all really deserve some seats.
He needs to take a seat, bro.
He does.
Real talk, man.
It is crazy, bro.
But anyway, we were saying, we're talking about real influence and real power.
Son, this guy is.
He understands it, though.
He comes from like a tech, you know what I mean?
Like, you know, Joe really understands tech.
He was talking about that, like how Spotify is tech, you know?
Yeah.
So they probably ran the numbers and realized he wasn't worth whatever he said because they're tech.
But you know what I mean?
Pretty data-driven.
It's data-driven.
It's, you know, it's tech-based.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
So you got to know the tech.
Yeah, absolutely.
Tech is the most important.
Tech.
Or just, you know, the numbers.
Just numbers.
That's what I'm saying.
Joe Rogan could single-handedly decide this election.
His 16 million people listen a week.
Yes.
That's 16 million people alone.
No, no, no, no.
It's way more than that.
Really?
Oh, my God.
It's crazy.
16 million is already fucking friends number.
He told me 400 million people a month.
It's insane.
It might be 16 million an episode.
It's insane.
Like, you never see anything like this, global influence like this.
Like, it's absolutely insane.
So he could fucking moderate.
And he does encourage independent thinking.
So there is a swath of his fan base that's massive and undecided.
Yep.
They would listen to this through and through.
Yep.
And motherfucker, he could really, if Biden agreed to this, which I hope he doesn't because it won't go well for him.
Yeah.
If Biden agreed to this, it could swing the election.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It'd be very interesting to see.
And real talk, I kind of prefer debates to be done by neutral people.
Yes.
Like Rogan has been neutral about stuff.
He hasn't supported Trump at all.
He hasn't supported Biden at all.
He's actually been critical of both of them.
It'd be nice to have somebody out there just literally asking the questions that the people want to ask.
Someone that is not locked into the political system.
Literally every time, it's like on Joe and I will text, right?
Every time Joe says anything about a presidential candidate, if it's about a right-wing, sorry, if he supports Bernie or something like that or criticizes Biden in any way, right?
Bernie is left-wing, but he's not establishment.
Right.
So what they'll do is they'll have to make him radioactive, him being Joe Rogan, radioactive.
So what he says doesn't matter.
So if he goes, hey, Bernie was the man, literally they can time out by the hour when the article about how he's transphobic or racist or sexist is going to come out.
Yeah.
Oh, the podcast that Joe Rogan hosts has all these racist, sexist, homophobic, transphobic, blah, blah, blah.
They just want to make him radioactive to dismiss what he has to say.
That's a different level of power, bro.
But it'd be cool.
It'd definitely be cool to see him do that.
I would worry about Biden trying to be coherent for four hours against Trump who.
Oh, there's no way.
You got to put him to bed.
You got a nap.
He's got a nap.
Yeah.
That's why I don't want to.
Trump is going to be fucking yaked up, dude.
That guy, he's going to be fucking snoring.
There's no way that he's not on Adderall minimum.
Oh, man.
But I wonder if all of them are on Adderall.
Not Sleepy Joe.
Not.
Son, low-key, that would be perfect.
You make Joe super sleepy.
If this is a Democrat strategy, this is a genius.
You make Joe sleepy.
You make him fucking up his words.
You make him look like an absolute idiot, right?
Yeah.
Pop him full of Adderall.
And then he comes out in the debate.
Expectations are super low.
He body slams Trump because the expectation is so low.
Because Biden's got it in him deep down.
Like you see those videos of him when he's young?
Son.
Bro, he's kind of a badass when he's young.
He was a badass when he was young.
There's a lot of raised shit.
Okay.
It's unacceptable.
It's unacceptable.
I actually think Biden wins because of that.
The expectations are already low.
Like Trump is way better of a talker.
He's funnier.
But because the expectations are low, Biden just has to do decent.
And if Rogan fact checks during this debate and he just like calls Trump out is like, no, that's false.
Like Trump might be tripped up a little bit.
Rogan needs Jamie there, fact check him.
That would be huge.
Rogan and Jamie fact checking.
Huge.
That would be fire.
Now, now I'm in.
If it's fact-checking, I'm in.
Just Jamie every once in a while just cuts off Trump.
Actually, the corona numbers were a little bit higher than you said.
Dude, that would be perfect.
Yeah, that would be dope.
That's kind of a good point you bring up, though, because people aren't looking to see Biden kill Trump.
They're looking to see if Biden's coherent.
They're looking to see if Biden's coherent and they are expecting Trump to kill Biden.
So now Trump has the expectation of like a comedian.
When you go on stage, it's like, you're about to make me laugh.
And that's why it's so much more difficult than just making your friends laugh.
Everybody's made their friends laugh.
Easiest thing in the world because the expectation is not you're about to do it.
So now Trump's level is higher for expectations.
Biden is down here.
Biden might body him.
They should take it.
Yeah.
The risk reward.
If Biden's able to come off as like, oh, he's got his shit together.
And so that means that he's not Trump and he's got his shit together.
All the people that are afraid of Trump are going to be like, oh, yeah.
Also, he's debating Trump.
It's not like Trump knows tons of facts and shit.
That's what I'm saying.
It's just a shit talk convo, right?
Trump is entertaining as fuck, but he's not going out there with, well, the city.
Doesn't that win, though?
Entertainment wins.
But Biden might be able to do that.
And in debates, Biden is pretty good.
Like, he's okay.
You know what he called Corey Booker Barack Obama?
Man, if that wasn't the funniest shit, they got almost no traction.
He goes, as the president says, why would the president be debating you?
Why the fuck would the president be debating?
You didn't see that clip?
Urologist and Wife Facts00:09:38
Amazing save, though.
His save was one of the best saves I've ever seen in history.
Let me see.
Here it.
Let me hear it.
What does he say?
You want to pull it up?
This is literally unbelievable.
So he goes, he goes, imagine, no, no, he goes, he goes, as the president said, and then he realizes he just calls a random black to the president.
Yeah.
Right.
Yeah.
And then he takes it back and he goes, I'm sorry.
As Makai Pfeiffer was saying in my favorite movie, hey, Miles.
No.
What he said was, I'm sorry, as the future president said.
That's a fine thing.
That was slick.
Fantastic.
That's slick.
That was super, super slick.
That's some shit you say to a shorty.
You know what I mean?
As my ex-wife is, I'm sorry, as my future ex-wife was saying.
What if Biden has us all tricked?
Like, maybe all these blunders that he has are like, he's doing it purposely for memes because he just understands that meme works.
Don't commit another blunder, Joe.
This ain't the time for another blunder, yo.
We've done blundering.
Yo, we're calling back to old Buddha.
That was classic.
The blunder, bro.
Blunders, bro.
For real.
Come on.
What else we got, Al?
Oh, there's new shit that's popping off right now.
J.K. Rollins' new book is being called Transphobic.
Mark, you knew about this one.
What's happening?
Yo, real talk.
J.K. Rowland looked trans, bro.
I think that's why she hates trans people so much.
All feelings, no facts.
This is all feelings, no facts.
She's a jellyfish.
It's a business hour.
All feelings, no facts.
I feel like I should get more money.
That's literally how he negotiates.
I want more.
Okay, you're racist.
Okay, but for real, though.
So this popped up on Twitter, and I was like, all right, they call her transphobic all the time.
Like, okay, whatever.
And I started reading the.
No, that's why this girl don't like trans people, bro.
She don't like trans people because she looked too much like them, bro.
This is the article, right?
So titled Troubled Blood.
The storyline centers around a cisgender male serial killer who dresses up like a woman to murder his female victim.
Why is she giving ideas, though?
Like, low-key?
First of all, she's giving serial killers ideas.
And if you dress up as transgender, there's going to be a bunch of woke-ass white women that are going to just go home with you so they don't seem transphobic.
And then they're going to end up murdered.
That's a fact.
Sometimes it pays to be a little bit prejudiced, bro.
She said that.
It's like, no, that's that Patrice.
Rest in peace, the goat.
Remember that Patrice bit?
He goes, he goes, what do you say?
If I walk on a plane and I see a black pilot, I'm going to be like, are you driving this plane to where the white pilot is?
No, the shit about the shit about.
He's like, not that biased.
What is that?
You got a lot of these jokes, bro.
Come to think about it.
No, what about, I'm racist or something?
He goes, I'd rather be at home out of breath, feeling a little bit racist for running away from some dangerous-looking people than lying in a pool of my own blood, feeling open-minded.
And literally, that is a lot how people act, though.
Yeah.
Be honest.
Like, when it's life or death, I had that girl that I had said she couldn't be my skydiving instructor.
I didn't tell y'all this story.
I don't remember.
I was supposed to go skydiving with MTV and they gave me some girl that was like 5'3.
And she was like, yeah, you're strapped to me and then you're going to do the whole thing.
And I was like, it's not going to be you.
So this guy is.
Yeah, they caused a problem.
The MTV people are upset.
I'm like, you ain't jumping out the fucking plate.
I need a grown man to jump out the plate.
Yo, hey, yo, bro.
I need a grown man strapped to my back.
Let's go.
You know what I'm saying?
Strapped to my back.
You know what I'm saying?
Pause.
Not the button type.
But for real.
Wait, so what did you think?
You think she wouldn't be strong enough to pull the cord?
What?
That's a one job.
That actually might be better if she's small.
That's like that.
She's the best.
I'm not taking no chances, bro.
What if I start spinning?
She don't got enough weight to stop the spinning.
She's a pair of shoes.
She's just holding on to your back.
I don't think it worked like that.
I don't know how it works, but my life was on the line, and I didn't want this little girl on my back.
Fucking cutie.
This girl is fresh out of cutie.
She goes, my life is on the line.
She's five feet to 100 pounds.
I need a grown-ass man wrapped around me.
You know, holding me around my waist.
You know, like fucking Jack and the diamond bitch from Titanic.
I don't remember her name.
What's her name?
Claire?
Titanic?
Titanic.
Listen, I'm having some blunders right now myself.
Oh, gosh, can I blunder, bro?
Don't commit another blunder, bro.
Not in my presence.
It's blundering, Taylor.
You feel like you're throwing a shade to show people?
Listen, Taylor, I would never let you.
I would never let you be my skydiving instructor.
Never once.
You do have guns, but it's too dangerous, bro.
It's too dangerous.
But how dangerous is skydiving, though?
You never heard of anyone dying skydiving.
What?
Yes, you do.
No, you never hear that shit.
Yes, yes, you do.
You hear about the people that are flying in the fucking little squirrel shoots or whatever.
What's not about?
What did you just say?
Yeah, I don't know who he was.
I don't try saying squirrel suit, but it came out as well.
Squirrel shoots.
Yeah.
You describing Akash as big as that.
No, but yeah, maybe you don't hear that many stories because they try to keep that marketing down.
Yeah.
They don't want to put those stories out because then we won't go.
Motherfuckers die.
How many people die at Skydiving?
Yo, one out of 10.
How many?
Between one and 10?
More than 10.
Every 10 jumps.
How many people die?
Zero every 10 jumps.
But you know what?
Marketing only takes one jump.
You know what I'm saying?
Like, let's be honest here.
You could die any single way.
Suppose, real talk.
I went to this place and sorry to blow him up.
516 skydive.
Everything was fine.
A week later, the guy who jumped with me died from his shoot not opening up.
Alone?
Really?
No, no, no.
He was just doing his own jump.
Yeah.
He's probably doing some dumb shit.
No, he wasn't doing some dumb shit.
It's one thing to do.
That.
How you do that dumb?
He's doing some dumb shit.
He didn't do it on time.
Yeah, he just did.
He waited till he hit the ground.
He's being silly.
He's fucking.
Doesn't even think happened.
That's kind of forgot.
That is dumb.
You think he forgot?
Yeah.
No, I'm not doing that shit.
I'm not playing around.
When it's life or death, we are not playing around.
I'm not skydiving.
But if I was, better be a big ass dude.
You got to skydive with men, bro.
You got to skydive men.
You also need to have a male urologist.
I'm not letting no female doctor look inside my dick, tell me what a dick should be or not.
That's actually a good point.
I wouldn't want a male gynecologist if I was a woman.
Why?
Come on, yo.
You don't know nothing about this.
Do you have a female gynecologist, Taylor?
Do you have a female?
You have a female.
What kind of creep is looking at pussies all day?
Sick.
My girl's dad's a gynecologist, but I agree.
You know what I'm saying?
Mark Dick.
Hey, keep it.
It is what it is, bro.
That's the worst job when you think about it because you're just looking at pussies when they're all fucked up.
Yeah, you get tired of it, probably.
When you go to the gynecologist, you don't go right after you wax.
It doesn't matter.
You don't go right after you wax.
You don't go when it's in perfect situation.
You go when your vagina's itching or burning.
That actually might be better, though.
When do you go when your shit looking like a pumpernickel bread?
If you're looking at vaginas every day from nine to five, you probably go home and you're tired of that shit.
You're tired of looking at pussy.
Now you gotta look at your wife's pussy.
You don't want none of that.
And he's so grateful.
Why is he grateful?
Because he's like, wow, it doesn't have fucking jelly beans or whatever.
You don't want to take it.
Colleges.
Say that word again.
Try to say that word again.
And in the middle, please don't eat Fritos.
Okay?
You are so high.
Why are you acting like you're not high?
Yes, you are.
We have a certain standard of professionalism.
Really?
I didn't appreciate that, Taylor.
Yeah, that growl.
I thought your buddy was in the room right there, bro.
That's not why you go to the gynecologist all the time.
Like, just when the pussy's fucked up, that's not why you have to go.
When would you go to the gynecologist when your pussy's not fucked up?
When you need that smear?
That peppy?
Yeah, just like the checkup.
Everything's cool.
I'm just saying, you're looking at it all day.
Sick or not, I don't want to look at pussy all day and have sex with my wife at home.
I don't try to take my work home with me like that.
That's a good point.
I fuck them at work.
You don't think a girl's ever been like, yo, just stick it in, bro.
You put a damn near shoehorn in there.
You got your fingers all up in the pussy.
You might as well just fuck.
You don't think they get propositions?
That's a good question.
Even gynecologists got to get propositions, bro.
Well, you think a female urologist gets proposition?
If a female urologist, we don't want to.
That job don't exist.
There's a urologist.
You ever been to one?
Guys don't check up on our dick.
Check up on my dick.
Half of my dick got to be green before I go check up on my dick.
A urologist appointment?
No guys ever made a dick.
You fuck Alex Smith's leg before he goes to Ugo.
Real talk.
How fucked up would your dick have to be before you go to the urologist?
You can't even imagine it.
I'd have to wake up and have no dick.
I'd have to wake up with no dick and I'd call the urologist and I'd be like, bruh.
Help me find it.
Help me find it.
You got a dick over there, bruh.
You have to have a dick over there.
After sparing dicks laying around.
I need a dick.
My dick disappeared in the middle of the night, bro.
You don't even wait too.
You'd have breakfast and shit.
I would have breakfast before I even do it.
Gang Respect Haughty Shit00:11:59
Hell yeah.
I'm not going to do that shit first thing in the morning.
If I don't have a dick, I'm growing out of here anywhere.
I'm telling you, going to the urologist is a rare thing that we do not do as men.
Yeah, you're right.
We don't care about our health in general.
Yeah.
But we double will not let people just touch our dicks.
We don't even touch our own dicks after we pee.
Who does?
We don't.
Who does?
We don't pat it dry.
We don't pat it dry, but we give it a whack.
We get that chariot moving.
Sometimes you've got to yaw.
You ever say that in urine on freak people out in Russia?
You know, I was in Russia and I pee at the airport.
I'll just go, y'all.
Why?
I don't know.
I just fuck with people.
It's what it is.
Anyway, point is: J.K. Rowland looks like a trans.
And do you think she's still a goat?
She's full-on transphobe.
No, I don't think she's transphobic, but I think she's being like radicalized.
The book is wild, bro.
The book is wild.
I think this is what happens.
Like when we were talking about this earlier, it's like when you, when you have an opinion that actually is reasonable, her opinion wasn't crazy.
She had a reasonable opinion.
And when you are chastised and ripped apart for that opinion publicly, like actor Hermione and fucking Harry from the show criticized, she made them motherfuckers multi-millionaires, right?
This bitch was already a millionaire.
She didn't need them.
She didn't need the movies.
The books, millions.
And she fought to have an all-English cast.
Like, you could have easily just been some fucking American dude, Harry Daniel Rowl, what's his name?
Radcliffe?
Ratcliffe.
I mean, she made a great deal when you think about it.
Like, the way that she sucked, you know what I'm saying?
She really did.
So the point is, she had the ability to do whatever the fuck she want.
She gets criticized for this opinion about being transphobic.
Okay.
She gets pushed into a corner and all of a sudden loses, and this happens to a lot of people, they lose all empathy for the other side.
Yeah.
Before she's trying to make intellectual arguments and like really trying to like showcase something reasonable.
And she was basically saying the experience of a woman is different than the experience of a trans woman.
Yeah.
Right.
A trans woman doesn't have a period.
A trans woman is not going through puberty like a woman's going through.
There is a fundamental difference.
And they just tore her apart.
Yeah.
Right?
Harry Potter out here.
I'm disappointed.
I'm just trying to.
My dick disappointed.
I hate disappointment.
Fuck you.
Who the fuck are you to be disappointed in me?
Yeah.
What kind of shit is that?
You're not my father.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
I'm disappointed in you.
I don't give a fuck.
She looked like she could be his father.
I'll be honest with you.
If anyone should be disappointed in Jacob Rowan, it should be Andrew.
Yeah.
For getting sick on that goddamn ride.
This bitch made me almost throw up.
Yeah.
Andrew.
She's stupid ride.
Caricature of him in the movie, and that's racist.
She did do that too.
Who with the Gringot?
Yep, the Gringots.
Also, Dobby.
Turns out a lot of the ugly characters that look like trolls and gremlins look like me.
Wow.
That's a little bit disrespectful.
She's Schulzophobic.
She is Schulzophobic.
She's afraid of this.
This bitch.
You should be disappointed.
I'm disappointed at her.
I'm disappointed in her.
That's some haughty shit to say.
What do you mean?
Before we move on, King Madden is like, what does haughty mean?
King Mad, like condescending.
Oh, my God.
That shit was crazy when you just said, like, we were supposed to know what that country-ass word meant.
Haughty?
Son, that's some haughty shit to say.
That's a haughty ass bitch, ain't it?
This bitch is the haughtiest.
She's really the haughtiest, bro.
Haughtiest bitch in Hogwarts.
Yeah.
Daniel Radcliffe.
Smat haughty.
Avita Cadabra, bitch.
We don't need you.
But in all seriousness, she just loses all empathy for the other side.
Now she's doubling down and trying to like, and it is a little bit fucked up because I think low-key, she's trying to be like, be afraid of trans people.
Right?
Like, what is the character in the movie?
That's what I'm saying.
Yeah, she's like, hey, beware.
They're dangerous.
They could kill you.
When in reality, it's probably the exact opposite.
I think there's probably more people killing trans people for being trans than trans people running around killing women.
Yeah.
Yeah.
A lot.
You realize if she wrote a book about that, everybody would say she's pandering.
She's full of shit.
This is the only movie she has.
I'll read the book.
Let's be honest.
She took the Schultz approach and doubled down.
She doubled down.
She went over the top.
Over the top.
This bitch got us spinning, bro.
Anyway, man.
Yo, y'all going to put some respect on Will Smith's name.
What happened?
Because when he was going through that situation with Jada and August Alcina, y'all was all calling him a little pussy.
He got cocked up.
And y'all was saying that, oh, it's not equal because we haven't seen any of the dudes that Will piped.
Whoa, Hey, yo, Al.
Hey, yo.
Oh, women that joke.
Al, there are some rumors about Will, but we won't go there.
Skydiving right now, Jay.
Do you think he cheated back with more men or more women?
Will.
Yo.
Hey, that's crazy.
Hey, you're going to put some respect on Will's name.
You're going to put some respect on Will's name, huh?
Yeah, you got to put some respect on Will's name.
My bad, my bad, my bad.
Come on, dog.
My bad, yo, my bad.
Yo, I know.
You talk to talk because you've been so high, I forgot you were here.
Yeah, but I didn't forget.
I didn't forget.
I got you out here talking wicked wild for no reason.
Don't be talking wiki wild for no fucking reason, bro.
It could get crazy in here.
God, I forgot.
Oh, shit.
That's not Will.
This picture of Will Smith surfaced with Margo and Robbie.
They both lifting up their shirt.
And you know what time that is.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, look at this.
That's what time it is.
Look at that.
So now y'all put some respect on the guy.
He definitely, he definitely threw the pod.
Respect on the guy.
He threw the pipe at her for sure.
Because they did multiple movies.
Harley Quinn.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
She played Harley Quinn, but they also did a movie called Focus.
Focus.
And another one, I think.
Suicide Squad?
Suicide Squad.
Huh?
That's the Harley Quinn character that.
All I'm saying is Will definitely threw the pod.
But is Will in the newest suicide squad?
I believe not.
You don't need to be.
My point is.
That's old.
You hit it and quit.
Yeah.
You hit it in quit.
But you also quit a franchise.
That's Will Smith, bro.
Don't ever forget my man saved the world and America.
Multiple times.
He saved the world.
Multiple times, bro.
Independence Day, bro.
Men in Black.
Men in Black.
Another Men in Black.
Shit.
What else he saved the world?
Wild West, Wiki.
Yeah.
What else?
Taylor?
Pursuit of Happiness.
Pursuit of Happiness.
They gave her a hundred.
Out here flexing bone density scanners for you broke bitches with your hollow bones.
Seven.
He saved seven people's lives.
Seven.
Saved seven people's lives.
Shit.
Was it called seven?
I think it's called seven pounds or something.
Come on, he was seven different movies with Brad Pitt.
It was all good.
Aladdin.
Yo, he saved genie.
He put motherfucking Jafar in the lamp.
Damn right.
Damn right.
Handcock.
Okay.
Put that brown motherfucker back where he deserved.
What?
What?
Huh?
Hand cock.
I think he's the same.
Handcock.
He did hand cock.
iRobot.
I robot.
Oh, my God.
Bad boys.
One.
Bad boys two.
Bad boys three.
I am legend.
We fighting off vampires.
Oh, my goodness.
Ali.
They were zombies.
Ali.
Boomaye.
Bro, he saved the world a million times over.
Son, don't you ever disrespect Will Smith again, bro.
Who did it?
Jada.
Jada.
What has Jada been in?
Poetic justice.
Jason's lyric was 30 years ago, bitch.
30 years ago, Jason's lyric.
We don't care no more.
We don't care about that, bro.
Set it off.
Set it off.
Set it off with fire, but you could have, honestly, you could have replaced her.
Nah, son.
Nah, sir.
I think she was in the Matrix 3.
Nah, she was, you know, the best character was Queen Latifah, then Vivica, then Jada, then that crying ass bitch.
That crying ass helpless ass bitch.
She got on my goddamn nerves, bitch.
Stop crying.
Rob somebody.
Fucking grow up, bitch.
We robbing banks with masks.
Grow up, bitch.
She's in Gotham.
She's in Gotham.
That trash ass show that's about not Bruce Wayne.
Come on, bro.
You need to show up, Commissioner Gordon, bitch.
Commissioner Gordon.
Don't nobody give a fuck about young penguin.
Oh, go quack, quack, ass penguin.
Get the fuck out of here, yo.
Why don't you wall your ass onto a real movie, bitch?
Now you're doing Hawthorne.
That's the worst part of LA, Hawthorne, bitch.
Stop it, yo.
You fucking loser.
What about the nutty professor, though?
Nutty Professor.
She wasn't even in the second one.
They got rid of Miss Pretty after the first one.
They like, I don't know, my motherfucking black movie trivia.
Let's go.
God's ready to go.
Ready to rumble at any point in time.
Let's go rumble, yo.
That's a savage right there.
That's a young Indian savage.
Oh, I'm doing it, bro.
That's a young Indian savage.
Not that type of savage.
Not that type of Indians.
Stop using that language.
Oh, Jesus, Mark.
Just came out of me organically.
That's a young Indian savage on that part of the studio.
It looks pretty nice.
Look at that Indian party.
That could be over the crack part of the studio as well.
We'll reserve a little corner for him somewhere off camera.
Yeah.
Let him play craps against a wall.
Oh, shit.
All right.
Let's wrap this up.
This is the last story out.
Okay.
So, um, John Wall apologizing for basically for partying.
Throwing up the set, though.
Like, Wall's been a blood, or at least like connected with bloods.
He's always throwing bees up when he hits a jump shot one out of every 40 fucking games this season.
And with all the shit that he could do with his fingers, you think he could hold a basketball in a proper position and shoot it.
So he's coming back from his Achilles injury and he's in this video.
He's in an apartment with a bunch of dudes.
They all got their shirt offs out.
Why the fuck do like gangs have a bunch of dudes with their shirts off?
What's up?
Why they got them bad A's?
They got some bad A's.
They got us.
Body tats.
Body tats make you mean.
Nah, because you got to keep your shit tight.
Oh, yeah.
Remember when Nas came out with what I forget which song that was in, but he had the thug-like tattoo, but he had the belly.
The godson masked.
Looking like Virgin Mary out here.
All right.
But yeah, so he came out and he's just throwing the setup.
He got the flag.
He's just being egregious and he's doing it for a camera.
And then he apologized when the shit ends up going viral.
Yeah.
Performance.
This was here in New York.
It was here in New York.
You could be in a game.
What are you saying?
He threw a party.
It was his party?
Yeah.
Bro, you could be in a gang as a athlete.
You can.
There's a lot of gang members that are still like actively involved in their childhood gangs, if you will.
I'm not going to out any, but y'all already know who the fuck they are.
Yeah, we, I think we all know.
Here's the thing: what you can't do is be open about it.
If you care about the gang, if you care about the gang, just be this amazing face, get the money, funnel it back to the guys in the gang, you do your nefarious activities or help out the hood, whatever the fuck that you want to do with it.
But once you go, I'm a gang member.
Now the deals with Adidas might go away.
The deals with Sprite might go away.
The endorsements might go away.
That's less money for your gang and the youth that could probably use you.
Let's say you're doing it for the best case scenario.
It's just stupid.
Come on, John Wall.
Stop living up to every single criticism that teams have about you.
Is that you're a head case and that you don't take this seriously.
And they're always out here partying.
You're not worried about the game.
Stupid.
Come on, grow up, yo.
A lot of motherfuckers need to grow up.
John Wall, that bitch from Set It Off.
All y'all got to grow up.
I got not having this immaturity.
I'm not having immaturity today.
Everybody needs to grow up.
All right.
Fucking learn how to negotiate, you're all people.
I'm done with the childishness.
All right, guys, we're going to take a break for a second.
Let me tell you something.
It's time.
NBA playoffs.
We are gambling.
Let's act like we're not gambling.
Gay Bi Identity Politics00:05:11
Okay.
Government out there giving us free money.
You know, we're going to gamble that shit.
Try to double it, triple it.
That's what we do.
All right.
You're going to do all that gambling over at my bookie.
It's mybookie.ag.
It's mybookie.ag.
Okay.
That's what you do.
And you know what they're going to do?
If you use our promo code flagrant, they're going to match your initial bet.
You put in money, they match it.
You get to gamble with all that money.
Think about that.
That's free money that you get to gamble with.
Use that.
Do it.
And you know what else they're going to do?
They're going to throw a $10 NBA future bet in as well.
All you got to do is enter the promo code Flagrant and then claim it when signing up.
Remember, my bookie, the terms are simple.
You bet, you win, they pay.
That's mybookie.ag.
If you're gambling, you go there right now.
Use our promo code flagrant.
Let's get back to the show.
How do you feel about Andrew Gillam saying he's not gay, but he is bisexual?
Who?
Bro, that shit's so funny.
Oh, did he admit it?
Yeah.
Because that shit was so funny when he was found in the hotel with the meth heads.
Yeah, with the meth on the ground.
Andrew Gillum.
He's like a Florida.
He was running for governor of Florida.
Lieutenant Governor or something like 2019.
What's your thought on Florida governor Andrew Gillam?
I didn't say gubernatorial, huh?
That word fucked Alex up so hard.
Motherfucking words.
Gubernatorial.
Alex said, Florida.
Governor.
Say that shit out.
I'll pronounce that old shit out.
Everybody be quiet.
Gubernatorial.
It sounds like he's asking for candies, bro.
We're going to get some goobery gubernatorials and popcorns and milk dunks.
Oh, my.
Andrew Gillum says, I don't identify as gay, but I do identify as bisexual.
That's funny because we identify you as gay.
Yeah, that is true, man.
We have no tolerance for that bisexual shit when it comes to dudes, huh?
You gay, yo, bro.
If you're bi, listen, you can't be.
Here's a good point.
You can't be bi and not gay.
So you're gay.
At least half gay.
That's it.
It's like, yo, are you black, Al?
Yep.
Are you Puerto Rican?
Yep.
Are you black?
Yep.
You're gay.
You're gay.
Got to watch into that one a little bit.
Yeah, I know, no, but for real, you can't be bi without being gay.
So you're gay.
Yep.
Now, are you straight?
Oh, yep.
No.
You're half gay and half straight.
Nope.
You're both.
So you're, I think gay is like black, where if it's half and half, you are that.
Boom.
Like if you're half black, half white, you're.
So, you're technically bothered.
There's a 1% rule with gay is the percent the amount of cum in your breath.
One drop.
That's one drop of cum.
One drop rule.
One drop of cum on your lips.
That's a great rule, actually.
That's the way it should be.
If it's one drop of cum, then you're good.
So, as long as you don't get cumb on you at all, you can still claim straight.
Wait, so Andrew's gay for eating his own cup.
That's the game cum, son.
That's gay.
No, you didn't come on you.
No, one time.
Come on.
You came in your mouth, son.
That's the game.
You look like they swallowed it like that.
I did tasty.
He's just punching me.
You said you launched it out and ate it like a dog.
You dropped it.
You did.
I thought you'll come.
What?
This shit hit my face, bro.
That's the gayest.
That's the gayest you could possibly be.
Why?
It's one drop.
Like, for like legit one drop on your face.
It wasn't one drop.
It was a lot of judgment.
The whole fucking nut.
This shit damn near scarred me.
I look like Too-Faced from Batman, bro.
Just sitting there on my bed like he was on the just burning your face.
Yeah, melting me, acid attack.
Get it off of me.
I didn't want to open my mouth.
It was maybe going to drip it in.
It's terrifying.
Didn't you say you tasted after Mark came in your bathroom?
You weren't sure what it was.
You touched a little bit, tipped it with your tongue.
Didn't you say that?
That's how you figured it out.
Alex, you disgust me.
You disgust me the way that you could turn on your friends.
The way that you can turn on your friends from the beginning of this podcast to the end of this podcast.
Are you going to be a traitor?
I'm bad loyal.
See, I'm loyal to everybody.
That is horrible.
Yeah.
I'm loyal.
How could you even put a rumor out there in the world like I would taste a semen?
I stepped on it.
I heel-toed that shit like I was at a Brazilian party on the bitch, but I did not taste it.
Oh, my God.
No, I didn't taste it.
I would never touch the bottom of my bathtub.
I'm a man.
I don't watch that shit.
It's absolutely repulsive.
Okay.
That's rap.
Say gubernatorial again, motherfucker.
All right.
So, in all seriousness, we're proud that he came out as bi, even though that shit is mad.
Pussy.
Yo, when dudes come out as bi, that's the most pussy shit in the world.
That's half measures, yo.
Just come out as gay, bro.
You love dick.
If you have to say, I'm not gay, you're probably gay.
You're probably gay, bro.
If you have to say, I'm not gay, I'm bi.
Like, in your coming out, probably gay.
Listen, if it's true, bruh.
It's true.
Where there's smoke, there's fire.
And you're flaming.
You're flaming.
Independent Creator Buys00:02:34
Real talk.
We got wildfires in Florida and California.
Better watch out.
Gender reveal caused it.
It turns out to dude in his hotel, bro.
The gender reveal in his hotel room.
That's so good.
Bro, shout out to Andrew Gillum.
Why they put the picture of him with his mouth open like he's about to suck some dick.
You can't find one picture with his mouth closed, bro.
Not one picture.
Yeah, no, it's got some nice lips.
Whoa!
What?
Well, were you being objective or gay?
Bye.
Hello.
God sick, dude.
That was fucking insane.
Do that.
All buys matter.
All bodies.
Yo, you got to come out with all buys matter.
If Andrew Gillum comes out with all buys matter, bro, a t-shirt.
Yeah.
I'll buy that shit.
Come on, bro.
Come on, bro.
All right, man.
Let's wrap this up, man.
Asshole Army, we appreciate y'all, man.
We really appreciate y'all.
We fuck with y'all.
Thank you so much for fucking with us.
We got the Patreon episode coming this Friday.
Top 10 Patreon in the world.
In the whole world.
No big deal.
That's what happens when you're independent.
You know, you bet on yourself.
Good things happen as long as you put that heart and soul into your work.
And you got to put your money with your mouth.
That's really what it is.
You know what I mean?
You should be able to do deals with networks.
I'm not knocking that.
You should be able to do deals with networks.
I think it's a great thing.
And independent creators like ourselves, truly independent creators like ourselves, try to build up enough leverage so that we can do deals where we have freedom in those deals.
We're not abused in those deals.
What, whatever, whatever.
Just move on.
We spoke on it already.
You're right.
You're right.
Let's give it a try one time.
We got here.
All right, man.
I think it's a wrap.
I think we're done, man.
I appreciate y'all so much.
Asshole Army, we fuck with y'all.
We love y'all.
You know what I mean?
We'll see you.
Really, really are the best, man.
And we appreciate you for spreading the word and building this.
We know what it is, man.
We know this is word of mouth.
I was about to say mouth to mouth.
Andrew Gillam in my brain right now.
Drop, bro.
We'll talk.
One drop me.
That's my first time one drop.
God damn.
It's like vampires, bro.
One bite.
So basically, we love you.
We appreciate you.
We know that you grew this fucking army one person at a time.
And we're incredibly grateful.
And, you know, we'll see you on Friday, Patreon, patreon.com slash Flagrant2.
Second episode every week.
Just a month.
Yo, man.
And listen, if you haven't joined yet, we know you're going to enjoy one day.