May 15, 2023 - Slightly Offensive - Elijah Schaffer
13:55
AUSTRALIAN Girls BODY COUNTS Will SHOCK You
Elijah is back out on the streets, this time in Australia, talking to the local people about what body count would disqualify you from being a potential spouse in this competitive relationship market. The girls and guys gave numbers so high, most Americans wouldn't understand. But are they really higher than most Americans, or are the Americans lying? Join this adventure down under as we explore the dating culture of these genuine Aussies.
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Australia, the land down under, known for its brutal outbacks, exotic animals, and a very unique people.
So you want to get married one day?
Bit on the fence about that for now.
Get your f ⁇ ing Finn up!
F ⁇ ing red-cliff dolphins are on the top of the f ⁇ ing leaderboard this year and they're winning!
And you fit up!
Yeah!
Fina Finn!
Or f ⁇ off!
Too high of a body count?
Wait, what'd you say?
Said there's no such thing as too high!
30 bodies, 40 bodies?
People can f ⁇ whoever they want.
I love that senior radar.
How high is your body count?
My body count?
My mommy doesn't want to know.
You know, I'm not really much to judge myself.
You know, I've been for some dark puffs.
What's your body count?
Wait, f ⁇ ing six, bro.
What's your body count?
Body count one.
Lower than 15.
I got 20 boosters injected into my nutsuck.
It's too high of a body count for your wife What's going on?
Dude, these girls are trying to tell you right now what a body count would be too high to get married.
Alright, lovely.
If you had a body count over like 10, baby, I don't think I could do you.
I could do you, but I don't think we could go together, you know?
I don't want to be rude and s ⁇ .
Anyways, f ⁇ ing Kings Connected, 4-3, 0-0.
F ⁇ ing smoke pipes, do whatever the f ⁇ you want.
Yeah, on that note, welcome back to Slightly Offensive.
My name's Elijah Schaefer.
We're here on the streets of Australia talking to people about body count.
How high is too high in the dating scene?
We're on the question of if a man is their ideal man, six over six foot, high income, six figures, and of course is athletic, tall, dark, and handsome, whatever.
How high would he think was too high of a body count in order to get married to you?
What do you think?
15.
We're in double digits already.
Double digits, double digits.
All right, you want to be on it, want to be on the video?
Yes, why not?
Hi.
Perfect.
What's your name?
Aria.
Aria, you look like you're having a great night tonight.
It's just starting in a spaby walk.
What do you plan on doing tonight?
Getting laid.
So what's your name, man?
My name's Theo.
Do you love the hose?
The hose.
I live for the hose, baby.
Are you planning on getting married to one one day?
I want to say fins up real quick, but not to a hoe, bro, but to a lovely lady, you know?
So if you had to put an age on when's a good time to get married, what would you say?
35?
35 is like pushing your fertility clock, you know what I mean?
You might not be able to have kids.
Does it matter to you if you have kids or not?
Oh, I'd like to have kids, but I think for me, I would be more open to adopting.
Are you ever planning on getting married one day?
Yes.
How high is your body count?
Pretty high.
Pretty high?
Like, how high?
80-ish.
80?
Like, really?
How old are you?
I'm 29.
Are you willing to admit your body count?
Sure.
10, 11, maybe?
What about you?
8.
I just don't really count and I feel like I'm in such a stage in my life that I'm so focused on me.
I don't really think about people that I've slept with.
I'm so focused on the future that it doesn't really matter.
How high would be too high of a body count for you to want to marry somebody?
Depends on how old, but like, no more than like 15.
That'd be real gross.
Literally don't care.
Like, whatever.
People are people.
What's too high of a body count on a woman that would be your potential wife?
I feel like it depends on my body count.
If they're around me, then I don't care.
So what's your body count now?
I have to keep it unshoes.
But like, I feel like if you're on 10, then you can be on 20.
But if you're on like two and they're on 10, that's a bit too much.
So you want to have s the hoes, but you'd marry a lady.
Exactly right.
If you're inexperienced and she's experienced, then you kind of feel left out.
But if you're both experienced, then it's good.
How high is your body count?
Next question.
Lower than 15.
Lower than 15?
She got really shocked.
People are...
She's running away.
Well, people are shocked.
I mean, does it surprise you, like in a country like Australia, that girls are out here with body counts averaging between 10 to 80?
That's a lot.
That's a lot.
80 is pretty high.
And like what age are you looking at with that?
28.
That's a lot.
How high is your body count?
Um, it's over 10.
Over 10?
Like 30?
20?
11?
Oh, yeah.
What's your body count?
One.
One.
One?
Yeah, one.
Did you love him?
Yeah.
My body count, my mommy doesn't want to know.
So whoop my ass?
My mother is Asian and my dad is Jamaican.
So I'm not going to say it publicly because I'll get my ass whooped.
Jamelia Walters is my name.
Love ya.
Do say.
What's your body count?
Four.
Your body count.
F me, swing in.
It's five.
What's your body count?
Like fing six bro.
Everyone's a fing slut these days, man.
Is everybody a slut today?
Not everybody.
Not everyone, but most people.
How high does your body count have to be to be considered a slut?
Every one of you, I'm gonna ask you.
Fing like uh at least over 10.
At least over 10.
Over five.
Over five?
Over five.
What's your body count?
Fucking six bro.
Wow.
Yeah, I say over 15, bro.
We gotta let the hoes go.
We gotta let the hoes go.
How high is too high of a body count for a girl to have to marry her?
Ready?
Three digits, man.
Three digits.
It's gotta be over 100.
Over 100 is like, that's a bit much for me.
Now, I don't know if it's just because we're in Australia or if this is the state of Generation Z, but it's kind of wild that you could have 99 problems and a body count ain't one, even if that body count is 99.
That dude said three digits.
100 was his cutoff.
100 dudes.
So it's not your wife, it's our wife.
You know what I'm saying?
Okay, where's your accent from?
I'm actually from Thailand.
100% you're not a lady boy?
I can show me a vagina.
This is all natural, honey.
Oh, natural.
What's the difference in body count between a hoe and a lady?
I don't think body count comes into it, man.
I think it's how you act.
To be honest, like it's the way you portray yourself.
So what if a girl wears low-cut t-shirts, she wears a short dress, she has a body count of one, is she still a hoe?
Nah, man.
It's how she acts.
So how does a hoe act?
Is she going to everyone around her and being like, oh, like, can I have some drinks?
Or like, buy me a drink?
Or I think that's a particular behavior that, you know, that comes with her accountability.
Wait, so if a girl has a high body count, that's not what makes her a hoe?
Nah, man.
I'm single because guys suck.
Because guys suck, what about you?
I'm single.
Okay, what sucks the most about guys?
At the moment, the dating scene is very much like guys don't know what they want, but they continue to try and treat you like a girlfriend without the labels.
It's kind of shit.
What does that look like, girlfriend without the labels?
So it's just like basically the girlfriend experience.
So like I'll take them on dates, I'll cook them a meal, I'll stay over at their place, but like God forbid they call me their girlfriend, yeah?
So they're afraid of commitment?
Yeah, absolutely.
What do you think's fueling that?
Um deep psychological trauma.
Are you out here to get girls tonight or you're out here to have fun?
Have fun.
So you're not trying to get girls?
Yeah.
Why not?
She's having a good time with the boys.
Just having a good time.
Having a good time together.
Just enjoying the night.
Not worrying about life, you know?
Does that include getting girls?
No, she's having getting that connection with the boys, you know?
Like it's supposed to be, right?
Yeah.
How high is too high of a body count to marry a woman?
She said she was 12.
Not many blood can admit to that.
I do have any.
Like it's supposed to be, right?
I'll take you like a hero.
I'll take you like a champ.
I can't have it.
Why?
It's a pummy burger.
But I'm Muslim.
I can't have it.
How much Muslims?
Don't worry about life, you know.
Assalamualaikum.
Sheesh.
Having getting that connection with the boys.
He's a COVID risk.
He's a COVID risk.
He's got to go home.
Can I have a kiss on the cheek from a f ⁇ ing idean?
This is my guy right here.
If a girl had chlamydia but she got over it, would you still marry her?
I'll target.
I'll take it like a champ.
Is a difference between a man sleeping around and a woman or do you think it's the same?
I don't know.
You could probably say there's a difference.
There's definitely a different like stigma around it, but like at the end of the day, it's just people loving people.
I don't know, it doesn't affect, it doesn't bother me that much What do you think guys would think was too high of a body count to get married if there was such a thing?
I don't think it really matters.
Like, who cares how many people you slept with?
If you love them, then you love them and that doesn't really matter.
But if like, if your body count is like 100, do you think you could have loved all 100 people?
Oh, no, for sure.
Everyone sleeps with people they don't love.
Who cares?
How high do you think guys would say is too high of a body count to get married?
We're talking about quality guys.
Like think in your head, what's the quality guy?
The guy you would want to marry.
Give me his height, his income, and his ethnicity.
What's the ideal man?
Well, my type is generally someone who has to be at least my height.
Well, that's only because it's me.
And I've always been to white guys.
Income.
Okay, so obviously this person has to be doing quite well for themselves.
And obviously that also represents like how really good they are at what they do.
How high would he think it's too high of a body count to marry you?
Well, if they are open enough, numbers shouldn't matter.
How high would be too high of a body count for a girl to where you would think guys might reconsider getting married to them, right?
Where you're like, maybe guys would be like, that's a little too high.
Can we get a number?
I think more than 20.
More than 20?
Yeah, I think more than 20.
Like about marriage, more than 20, yeah.
What about you?
I'd say like 100.
How high do you think it's too high of a body count for a girl before a man wouldn't want to marry her?
I think that's not.
I think a girl should do as much as she wants to do, like each to their own.
No, no number.
It shouldn't really matter how many people you slept with.
What's a healthy number of s partners in a year?
I'd say like five to six.
Five to six, yeah.
So then you'd have to get married by the time you're 22 or 23 because that would hit 20.
Maybe I will.
You might, yeah.
What about you?
How do you think there's a healthy amount of partners?
I was gonna say like one to two.
One to two?
Yeah.
Because like doesn't mean like how many times with each one, right?
Yeah, that's not how many times.
It's how many people you got going.
I reckon four.
Four is like four a year.
And then you get married at 29?
Like every like four months you can change up, but yeah.
Do you think that it's important before you get married to tell each other how many people you've slept with?
That should mean shit.
Nothing.
It means nothing.
What about you?
No.
How many hamburgers have you had before you got married?
I'm an American, so too many.
Does it matter?
Like, how many swims in the ocean have you had before you got married?
Like, it shouldn't matter.
It's like nominal amounts.
It doesn't matter.
Do you think body count is an important factor that men would consider when choosing a wife?
100%.
Why do you say 100%?
Yeah, I think they consider it.
I don't think they should.
I don't think they shouldn't, but they do.
They do.
I do.
Okay, why do you think it's fair if they do?
I feel like if you have self-respect, then you haven't slept around.
So, like, not sleeping around is like a form of self-respect?
Oh, no.
Why do you say that it shouldn't matter?
It's like, who knows what you've done in your past.
Your past is your past.
We were talking to girls tonight about how high was too high of a body count.
So, you're the closer.
You're the end of the night.
You're having a good time.
How high is too high of a body count to marry a chick?
I'd say 14 to 19.
Why 14 and 19?
Statistically speaking, it is the correct numbers.
It is the correct.
All right.
What advice would you have for the boys who are trying to avoid marrying the hoes?
How do we avoid the hoes?
Just be yourself.
Don't settle for too little.
Well, thank you so much for watching another episode of Slightly Offensive.
Don't forget that you can support us directly at ElijahSchaefer.locals.com.
Wait, click the link in the moth bio and support this motherfucker.
Give him a sponsor.
He needs one, doesn't he?
Look at the price of his t-shirt.
Give him a sponsor.
Yeah, give him some support.
Like the video, share it with a friend.
And yeah.
Perfect.
Awesome.
My name is Elijah Schaefer, your top 17 host.
Have a great rest of the night.
God bless the United States of America and Australia.
