All Episodes
Feb. 7, 2023 - Slightly Offensive - Elijah Schaffer
01:43:02
SURPRISE SURPRISE: SATANIC Grammys SPONSORED by Pfizer

From Dylan Mulvaney being the best dressed male/female, to LIzzo wearing a potato sack and getting "best album" of the year, the Grammys did not disappoint. From overt satanism, occult practices, grooming, useless idol worship, and so much more, we are gonna have a blast! Plus, we are covering the scam of the popped spy balloon, some nonsense I found in dark places on the internet, and so much more! ______________________________________________ ⇩ SUPPORT OUR SPONSORS ⇩Show more DOG FOOD EXPOSED: Don't feed your dog shredded rotten meat and trash. This will kill your dog and make their lives far less than what they could be. To bring out your dog's healthy and energetic potential, visit: https://dogfoodexposed.com/OFFENSIVE FOOD SUPPLY: Don't wait until the grocery stores are empty to be prepared! Get the super survival food that lasts 25 years and helps gives jobs to over 200 Americans in a family owned facility in the USA. And right now and for the next few days, listeners of Slightly Offensive will get 10% their first order at https://4patriots.com/ by using code OFFENSIVE. VSHRED: All at once, everything in our country is trying to kill and make us less manly. Men today have the SAME TEST LEVELS as an 80 year old man from 15 years ago. In order to unlock your full potential and reclaim your manhood at https://www.vshred.com/elijah ________________________________________________________________ I'm now fully INDEPENDENT - join the community and support the show at https://elijahschaffer.locals.com/ You won't regret it! ________________________________________________________________ Grab the NEW Limited Edition Merch before it's gone: https://slightlyoffensive.com/shop/ _________________________________________________________________ ⇩ DONATE AND SUPPORT THE SHOW ⇩ ➤ ONE-TIME https://slightlyoffensive.com/donate/ ➤ VENMO https://account.venmo.com/u/Elijah-Schaffer ➤ PAYPAL https://paypal.me/slightlyoffensive?country.x=US&locale.x=en_US ________________________________________________________________ DOWNLOAD AUDIO PODCAST & GIVE A 5 STAR RATING!: APPLE: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/slightly-offens-ve-uncut/id1450057169 SPOTIFY: https://open.spotify.com/show/7jbVobnHs7q8pSRCtPmC41?si=qnIgUqbySSGdJEngV-P5Bg (also available Google Podcasts & wherever else podcasts are streamed _________________________________________________________________ ⇩ SOCIAL MEDIA ⇩ ➤ INSTAGRAM https://www.instagram.com/slightlyoffensive.tv ➤ GAB https://www.gab.com/elijahschaffer ➤ GETTR https://www.gab.com/elijahschaffer ➤ TWITTER: https://twitter.com/ElijahSchaffer ➤ FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/officialslightlyoffensive ______________________________________________________________ ➤ CONTACT: [email protected] _________________________________________________________________ The Idea Of A Free Society...For Kids! Head to https://bit.ly/teach-freedom for a unique book series that introduces the important ideas that schools no longer teach. elijah schaffer Show less

Participants
Main
e
elijah schaffer
01:08:45
k
kezia schaffer
16:39
|

Speaker Time Text
elijah schaffer
Well, once in a blue moon, controversies arise that have to be addressed.
I'm talking about none other than the Grammys, which has been satanic many years in a row.
And it's not actually surprising, but of course, I love laughing at fat black women, aka Lizo, only because she looks so good.
And I'm just filled with joy.
I like Dylan Mulvaney making all the boys look their best dressed, wearing a red crimson gown.
I mean, America is back, baby.
We have spy balloons over our country.
The griffs are high.
The stakes have never been lower.
And of course, we're all triple boosted.
Like I mentioned, I'm a little bit late today because last week I was getting my son's dick cut off.
And this week I was actually getting my daughter's forearm skin removed so we can make a fake penis for her.
So apologies.
I had to keep my priorities in order.
We have so much fun stuff to talk about.
I'm excited to be here.
It is approximately 10.15 p.m. Eastern Time in the United States.
Let's get down.
unidentified
I don't
elijah schaffer
know what happened there.
Well, I'll tell you this.
I spent the afternoon with Brucey Boy.
unidentified
Brucey.
elijah schaffer
My in-law's little puppy.
And so I was just swimming in the ocean, having a good time.
So you get Beach Boy, Beach Hair Elijah, aka I just got out of a green room with Dylan Mulvaney.
We don't know what happened.
kezia schaffer
I don't know.
unidentified
Was it Brucey or was it Dylan?
elijah schaffer
We don't know.
My name is Elijah Schaefer.
I'm your top 17 host on another shit stream live stream Monday, Wednesday, Fridays at approximately 10 o'clock Eastern Time in the United States.
We have so much to cover today.
I am joined in the studio by the lovely, the beautiful Kez Queen Fetus.
unidentified
Woo!
kezia schaffer
I was just acting out what would happen if you got injected in my dance routine, if anyone noticed.
elijah schaffer
Yeah, it doesn't turn out well.
Well, if you guys don't know about this, so the Grammys just took place.
Let me bring my seat up.
I feel like I'm really short here.
The Grammys just took place in the United States.
And surprisingly, I'm actually not shocked that it was filled with transsexuals, homosexuals, and of course, my favorite beautiful girl that I try not to get off to too quickly, Dylan Mulvaney.
Looking hot.
Looking hot, Dylan.
Looking beautiful.
I want to just play this here.
I think we have a slow motion.
kezia schaffer
Brand new face and everything.
elijah schaffer
Do you know, everybody, just to remind you guys that we are, I can bring this up.
You guys can get, it is officially, we are live now on locals.
You can go right there to ElijahSchaefer.locals.com.
Join the movement.
Support slightly offensive.
Become a slightly offensive backer.
If you don't join, you a bitch.
But you can join and also be a son of a bitch.
An SOB, a slightly offensive backer.
It's really awesome.
I encourage you to join.
But that is, we are live on there now.
We're officially live on locals.
And everyone on locals decided they said they really wanted one thing was slow motion.
kezia schaffer
Dylan Mulvaney spinning around.
Wow.
Wow.
That is peak masculinity today.
Look at that hairline.
elijah schaffer
Yeah.
kezia schaffer
That goes like straight across.
elijah schaffer
Oh, yeah.
I've been trying.
I'm really feeling that.
kezia schaffer
Still, you know, he's still got work to do, unfortunately.
Sorry, Dylan.
elijah schaffer
think he's had a lot of too much work actually from my understanding so this is as long as he keeps his mouth shut Oh, his mouth is open.
I can say this, coming from the green room, Brucy wasn't the only thing that was barking up the wrong tree.
I feel like, though, what's weird about this is no matter how hard people try to look like women, they just look like dudes in a dress.
kezia schaffer
Yeah, you know, it's the figure.
unidentified
Yeah.
kezia schaffer
And the thing is, as well, is he did get his facial whatever feminization.
But even though it does make him look more feminine, you can tell that they've had work done.
elijah schaffer
Someone in the chat said Elijah would still hit.
Yeah, probably.
unidentified
Aww.
elijah schaffer
No, I mean, I mean, but realistically speaking, it's the sad part is it's like you neither look like an attractive female nor do you look like a handsome male.
Like, you just basically.
kezia schaffer
There's nothing wrong with that hairline, though.
Doesn't it kind of look ripply at the top?
Like, drawn on?
elijah schaffer
Yeah, it looks like someone who grew up either without a father or was abused by one.
kezia schaffer
Yeah, that's a good observation.
elijah schaffer
That's just the hairline of someone who's abused by a father.
Anyway, we got a lot to talk about today in terms of the Grammys, the Grammy shenami Mwammis.
But I do want to remind you guys something amazing.
Don't forget to take care of your best friend.
Now, I was with my little puppy boy, Brucy.
He's like a little Australian, what?
What does he use?
Cattle dog or something?
kezia schaffer
I think he is.
elijah schaffer
Yeah, a little cattle dog.
But of course, you know, dogs, I got a little gunther at home, and it's so important to me to take care of them.
But most dogs are being fed a terrible, terrible, terrible product called meatmeal that's in all their food.
And it's actually full of packing supplies, packages, waste food, and it could be making your dog sick.
Now, of course, Dr. Marty figured out which foods contain this product.
And it's very important.
Now, if you love a dog, if you know someone who does, they deserve our best.
And a lot of times we're overspending on food that we don't need.
That's still keeping the dog tired.
That's actually terminating their life early.
And you've got to find out if you're feeding your dog this one product.
So what you're going to do is go to dogfoodexpose.com slash offensive.
The link's in the description.
You're going to take that link.
You're going to click on it.
You're going to send it to friends and find out if your friend has the wrong kind of dog food or you do.
And also know that Dr. Marty figured out a way to create food that increases the longevity of your dog, takes care of their sensitive guts so they're not all shitting around your house, and also, of course, doesn't contain these harmful products.
So check it out.
Go to dogfoodexpose.com slash offensive.
D-O-G-F-O-O-D E-X-P-O-S-E-D.com slash offensive and find out how to take care of your dog with the best food.
So I think we were back looking at my favorite dog here.
I want to jump into this because I think what makes what sets this show apart is it is the best worst show.
It is not good, right?
Tim Poole had almost the same title, and his show's good.
Our show is bad, but it's the best of the worst.
kezia schaffer
Yeah, well, you've got to be the best at something.
elijah schaffer
Yeah, like think about this.
I don't think Tim Poole would show this picture of Joe Biden.
kezia schaffer
Let me see.
elijah schaffer
That's what Jill Biden.
kezia schaffer
I want Jill.
Jill, come on.
elijah schaffer
That's Jill Biden.
That's Jill burrito.
kezia schaffer
Because she loves the, because the Mexicans love burritos, and she loves Mexicans because of their burritos.
elijah schaffer
With Tim Poole show that?
kezia schaffer
I'm not a baggie burrito.
elijah schaffer
Would Tim Poole show that?
No, he wouldn't.
unidentified
No.
elijah schaffer
That's why I said Tim has the pool.
This is the jacuzzi.
We have the after party.
kezia schaffer
We don't have the budget.
elijah schaffer
We don't have the budget.
We don't have the staff.
We don't have the guests.
We don't have the set.
We don't have the travel budget even.
We don't even have the conversation, the co-hosts.
What do we have?
kezia schaffer
A good heart.
elijah schaffer
Good hearts.
kezia schaffer
Yeah.
elijah schaffer
And egg burrito pictures.
kezia schaffer
And egg burritos.
Good hearts.
And a good sense of humor, I would say.
elijah schaffer
And a soundboard with two little sound effects that are overused.
unidentified
Yeah.
kezia schaffer
But at least we're using them.
elijah schaffer
At least we're using them.
kezia schaffer
Some people don't even have any.
elijah schaffer
Let's just go into this.
So speaking of the Grammys, the Grammys is basically absolutely atrocious.
I'm going to get some images.
We'll start out with some images today.
Lizzo dressed up as a pizza monster slash blood clot in her artery.
Lisa and Shania Twain lead the worst dress stars at the Grammys.
Lizzo is the only artist to dress up as a live microscopic insertion of what it looks like inside her aorta.
kezia schaffer
You know what?
elijah schaffer
It looks like a blood clot.
Am I wrong that it looks like a blood clot?
Because I feel like that looks like a blood clot.
kezia schaffer
Yeah, I, to be honest, I think I immediately thought of something else, but Blood Claudis was a close second.
elijah schaffer
Yeah, Blood Claudiest.
I like the Blood Clautostrophe.
I want to get some more stuff.
kezia schaffer
Did she take the robe off at any point?
elijah schaffer
Yes, she did.
And we have images of it.
unidentified
Are you ready to get your first Chabby?
kezia schaffer
Well, I don't know if I can do that, but I'll try.
elijah schaffer
Yes, we do have a couple images.
I want to see if I actually have them.
Oh, yeah, here's another image of her, what she wore to the outfit.
Someone said she looked like a meatball.
unidentified
Wow.
kezia schaffer
So I can tell, I think I'm starting to pick up on the theme of the Grammys.
Food.
Your favorite foods.
elijah schaffer
Yes.
kezia schaffer
And your favorite big pharma companies.
elijah schaffer
I just, I just love, like, you know, we talk about how they talk to fat girls.
And they're like.
kezia schaffer
I don't know.
elijah schaffer
You know, they tell fat girls, you know, girl, you look good.
Slay queen.
unidentified
Yeah.
elijah schaffer
Girl, you're looking hot.
kezia schaffer
And I don't get complimented as much as.
elijah schaffer
A fat chick.
kezia schaffer
Yeah.
elijah schaffer
Why does no one ever tell a fat chick, you look like a hot scrunched up ball of pork on and like, like, you look like a meatball.
kezia schaffer
That looks like delicious.
elijah schaffer
You look like a fire meatball in an Italian restaurant.
kezia schaffer
I want to eat you up, girl.
They're not joking.
elijah schaffer
Like, is it even wrong if I said, yo, I'm going to eat your pussy because your pussy tastes like pork.
kezia schaffer
Okay, I wasn't expecting that.
unidentified
Because that's that song.
Hey, little mama, show me what pussy cousins eat.
kezia schaffer
Okay, well, I don't know.
elijah schaffer
I don't know any of the lyrics.
kezia schaffer
I'm not going to listen to, but it's about a cat.
elijah schaffer
It's about a cat.
kezia schaffer
No.
elijah schaffer
I really feel disgusted right now.
If you were insinuating, I would use a different word on the show.
kezia schaffer
Oh.
elijah schaffer
This is the only show that I have to guarantee to mark not for children whenever I sign up for the live streams.
I have to double-click it.
I always just check to make sure we don't get in trouble.
But I always said, there's parents who get mad at me.
They're like, you said that on the show.
I go, this show's not for children.
I have to mark a box.
It says, is this for children?
And I click no.
kezia schaffer
I think Lizzo's show is for children.
Probably, I'd say.
I'd want all my kids to watch her show.
elijah schaffer
Well, Lizzo, there is a picture.
She did take it off.
The best dress from the Grammys came out.
This is my favorite.
This was her on the stage in her performance.
kezia schaffer
Oh, no.
elijah schaffer
She was performing as a tampon.
I believe that's what it.
kezia schaffer
Are you just making a joke or she genuinely?
elijah schaffer
She looks like a tampon full of blood, like a used tampon already absorbed.
kezia schaffer
Okay.
In this picture?
elijah schaffer
Well, I just want to say this to ladies.
What's stopping you from looking like that?
What's stopping.
kezia schaffer
My appetite?
elijah schaffer
Do you know I asked, okay, can we see this?
So I asked people, what's stopping you from looking like this?
And I'd love to see the best responses.
If you always want to, you could make sure that you guys always follow me on Twitter.
It's really important.
Go to Twitter at Elijah Schaefer.
If you want to get involved in these and be seen on the show and actually have your opinion.
I asked people, what is keeping you from looking like this?
And just on a favorable mention, someone in the Telegram posted this, telegramt.me slash slightly offensive.
As we look at these pictures, they said, it'll be okay.
So many demons, Jesus.
He's like, I like my Jesus is white.
I'm just kidding.
No, I don't even know how Jesus looked.
But apparently that's supposed to be him.
And he's like, so many demons.
I always picture that the frogs pick like this.
Like a kind of like a child at Down syndrome.
kezia schaffer
I don't know.
elijah schaffer
I wonder why the show doesn't get more mainstream sponsors.
Meanwhile, I'm like making a Down syndrome voice for a frog in Jesus' arms and wondering, huh?
I wonder what decisions I've made with my life that have got me to this position.
kezia schaffer
Do you just think that frog would sound like that?
Or when you see frogs in general, you think that they all have Down syndrome voices?
elijah schaffer
That's a good question.
I think all frogs speak in Down syndrome.
unidentified
I think frogs speak in French.
elijah schaffer
Do you know Josh LaCash?
We have him on the show sometimes from the Wrong Opinion podcast.
He writes the best takes of anyone I've ever seen.
And there was the Right for Life organization or whatever, Lilla Rose's organization, has a guy with Down syndrome speaking in front of Congress.
And they're like, and he testified.
And he's going, this guy testified and explained how he's grateful for his life.
And then Josh just like retweeted it and was like, that was definitely not a retarded answer.
Anyway, anyway, I asked people if what's keeping you from looking like Lizzo.
And what's so we, this was, this was the prompt of the post.
What's stopping you from looking like this?
unidentified
Wow.
elijah schaffer
What's stopping you from looking like that, ladies?
What is stopping you?
And we got a myriad of responses, actually.
kezia schaffer
My stomach can't.
I just, at some point, I just have to stop eating.
elijah schaffer
So Adam Krigler said, confidence at about 250 pounds.
kezia schaffer
That's a very scientific answer.
elijah schaffer
It's really remarkable.
It's really remarkable.
We had about 652,000 views on this.
unidentified
What else did people say?
elijah schaffer
Isabella Maria DeLuca said, self-respect.
unidentified
Okay.
elijah schaffer
BD Edwards put up a nice little gift.
This is what's keeping him from looking like this as well.
kezia schaffer
We don't all get giant donuts.
elijah schaffer
Zariot Highline said, my healthy eating habits.
I'll be honest.
I've been over 200 pounds in my life.
I have compassion for overweight people.
I like what Waymore Woke actually said, said it was the price of food.
unidentified
Yeah.
elijah schaffer
The price of food was keeping me from looking like that.
I think one of the other ones that I liked, where is it at?
It was down here.
Somebody, oh, yeah, somebody said 6,000 calories per day for three years is what's keeping me from looking like that.
kezia schaffer
Wow, yeah, that's a lot.
6,000 of them.
unidentified
Yeah, I know.
kezia schaffer
You have to be really committed to that sort of lifestyle.
elijah schaffer
Oh, we do.
We do.
Don't forget, guys, as well, that we are right now.
We're on Rumble, so you can follow us at Rumble.
We're here on the page.
You can see us.
We're totally, you can get in the chat.
You can also send super chats through here as well.
We got the chat going.
We also have the nice old YouTube chat as well, going hot, going hard.
And we have the locals chat.
And we'll read super chats at the end, but I can read you the entire time and I can get some awesome opinions from you guys.
Let's go into the satanic side of it.
So I think what's kind of weird to me is how people are surprised about the Satanism, you know, like as if it's not already to be expected.
I think a lot of the right wing goes like, I can't believe the Grammys would allow something satanic.
unidentified
What?
elijah schaffer
And it's like, do we not remember past years?
Like, do we not remember any of these things?
Like, do you not remember this?
kezia schaffer
Or like Super Bowl event or literally like any event?
What about that one event where it was one of the Kardashians' boyfriends?
elijah schaffer
What about the business?
kezia schaffer
And they all died at his concert.
elijah schaffer
Do you not remember this one?
kezia schaffer
Yeah.
The Kardashian one where they all went into the tunnel and died.
elijah schaffer
Yes.
kezia schaffer
So I feel like this is kind of like this is kind of expected now.
If it was like totally chill and there wasn't anything about Satan or sex, I would have been like, what has gotten into them?
elijah schaffer
These children are just trying to make some music.
unidentified
Yeah.
elijah schaffer
Whatever happened?
I do think, though, that this is, it is interesting because it is the cultic side of things.
kezia schaffer
I love it.
elijah schaffer
Yeah, there's a song.
Why am I messing up?
Chat, what's his name?
He's actually a friend of mine, and I'm like, there's just so much going on in my brain right now.
Who's the rapper, the white rapper, who's always got good lyrics?
I've had him on the show.
kezia schaffer
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
elijah schaffer
Come on.
Who is he?
kezia schaffer
I don't know.
I forgot what his name is.
elijah schaffer
No, but he's my friend.
unidentified
No.
kezia schaffer
I'm thinking, thinking, thinking.
So I'm just saying out names.
Let me hook.
elijah schaffer
Tom.
Tom McDonald.
kezia schaffer
Tom McDonald.
elijah schaffer
Yeah, so Tom McDonald really, really just like wowed me.
He actually really was impressive, and I was really happy to see him just go in this positive direction because he had Instagram.
Instagram, Tom McDonald.
He actually had a song about this, and he was reminding people that he had once spoken about this on his rap music.
Why wouldn't you interview?
Why wouldn't you write in Tom McDonald?
Here it is.
It doesn't show up his main page.
He actually had rapped about this, and I wanted to play this.
Can we not play this without logging in?
Why do we have to log in?
Okay.
And then it doesn't let you log in.
This is why I fucking hate this because it doesn't let me like change.
Look at this.
It doesn't let me.
It doesn't let me.
I have to do this and then I can't get in.
And then I can't.
I can't.
It ever lets me log in to like actually click on the account.
And I try to log in.
And then I can't.
It can't change the account that I'm trying to log in with.
I don't know.
So I guess we won't play that because they don't give a shit about us existing.
unidentified
Yeah.
elijah schaffer
How do we, how does this not work?
Okay.
Screw it.
We're not going to try it anymore.
We're not going to try it.
We're not going to try it.
But he did rap about this and it was really incredible.
And I wondered if he actually had put it on his Twitter.
unidentified
I just want to say, you impress me every day, darling.
kezia schaffer
You impress me with your skill in show business to while your mind is not here with us because you're actively trying to find something.
You won't stop talking.
You'll keep talking and make sure that everyone's still listening and while you're doing something else.
elijah schaffer
I've done years of live shows.
I've done years of live shows.
I've never canceled them myself.
They've been canceled, but I have still the same guy, and I still continue to speak a lot.
Oh, here's the video.
I found it.
unidentified
Oh, wow.
elijah schaffer
Yeah, this was really good.
This is from Tom McDonald.
unidentified
You see the symbols in their videos.
It's not accidental, they sold their souls to be famous, it's not a death they can settle.
elijah schaffer
Let's check the lyrics, you can hear it on every instrumental.
unidentified
These award shows aren't about the music or visuals, they're designed to be identical to satanic rituals.
elijah schaffer
You buy tickets to concerts, you're not aware they're performing.
unidentified
Black masks and the fans are part of the ceremony.
The industry been infected, Illuminati agendas communicate with the youth.
These are messages in the records.
elijah schaffer
It's all black magic.
Wanna hear the devil play the track backwards.
unidentified
This is facts, which cracked in a rap album.
elijah schaffer
Celebrities have clearly been cursed.
Research the conspiracy first.
It's so obvious they're taunting us with little oozy verse.
unidentified
Say it slow, sound it out.
Lil' Lucifer.
There's devils around me, girls on their maddoes.
So walk through the valley, they follow his shadow.
elijah schaffer
He's a scary-looking dude.
That is frightening.
kezia schaffer
Yeah.
elijah schaffer
He is very scary and one of the nicest people you will ever meet in your entire life.
Him and his girlfriend are some of the sweetest people.
It's always that the look is always deceptive.
You know what I mean?
Like you always assume that this person's going to be scary in person, but he's really nice.
And I really like him a lot.
Tom is a wonderful dude.
I've met a lot of good people in this industry, a lot of bad people, but he's one of the good ones, for sure.
For sure.
And one of the nice things about this, I think this was a previous song.
I don't listen to rap music.
I'm not into rap music because I'm white and I have self-respect.
But I also totally understand that his music's not really rap.
It's like pop singing lyrical.
I jive with the fact of what he's doing because he's breaking into a genre where people talk about like the N-word and popping pussies and Lizzo.
And he's like, hey, I'm going to rap some real lyrics.
And it's not just like, it's not just like Donald Trump lyrics.
You know what I mean?
Like, Hunt Biden's laptop.
I found his laptop.
unidentified
I'm going to fuck his laptop.
I love that song.
elijah schaffer
I mean, this is pretty intense, right?
I mean, this is like, this is like, he puts time into his work.
He puts effort into his work.
He's a very talented guy.
And he's self-funded.
He's completely independent.
And he's really impressive to me.
Although I don't really listen to rap music.
I think him and Hi-Rez are probably up there with the better.
If you're into that stuff.
If you're into this kind of music, that's where it's up.
But I do like, if you even just see me trying to listen to rap music on the live streams, I look awkward.
I'm like, yeah.
Why, are you on the...
Is the chat popping off?
unidentified
Yeah.
Yeah.
kezia schaffer
Oh, just this one.
This one's making me funny.
Ah, it's broken.
Never mind.
elijah schaffer
I can bring up the chat here.
unidentified
What?
kezia schaffer
Oh, there's just this one.
elijah schaffer
How about a fuck Hunter Fighter?
unidentified
Okay.
elijah schaffer
All right.
Moving along.
Okay.
So that was what he was saying about the Satanism.
But because we're demonetized, I think I can actually play some of these things where other people can't actually play them.
This was the performance that people were talking about.
We're not going to watch the whole thing, but...
kezia schaffer
Sam's one.
unidentified
You are definitely onto something.
That's where you make noise.
Yeah, thank you.
elijah schaffer
Can we just stop and say, what the hell is that?
What's going on there?
kezia schaffer
You know what?
It looks like if you went to boarding school and you had to wear a strict uniform, however, you could do your hair however you liked.
elijah schaffer
What do you mean?
kezia schaffer
Well, she's got like a headmaster's uniform on, kind of.
But then she's got, like, two big long noodles coming down the front of her head and then some loop-de-loops on the side.
elijah schaffer
This looks like a girl in the 90s that would offer you ecstasy in high school, but she's...
kezia schaffer
Or, or the girl from that movie called Napoleon Dynamite who makes bracelets and goes and sells them to people.
elijah schaffer
Deb?
kezia schaffer
I don't know what her name was, but that kind of reminds me of her.
elijah schaffer
Alright, well, here we go.
unidentified
So I'm here to give you a little bit of a single-screen.
I'm sorry.
elijah schaffer
Is she carrying a BDSM whip?
kezia schaffer
I think.
elijah schaffer
It was a BDSM whip.
kezia schaffer
Yeah, because you whip.
Yeah, I. Makes sense.
I don't know why that would be weird to carry that around to an award.
elijah schaffer
A little sauce.
unidentified
A little sauce.
To all the rebels out there forging a new path and taking the heat for all of it.
You guys need to know, all you troublemakers out there, you need to know that your fearlessness does not go unnoticed.
kezia schaffer
She's talking to you, Lodge.
unidentified
You are seen.
kezia schaffer
Yeah.
unidentified
You are heard.
And most of all, you are appreciated.
Ooh.
kezia schaffer
Clapping with her whip.
unidentified
So now, speaking of controversy, it gives me great pleasure to introduce two incredibly talented artists who have risen above the noise, the doubt, the critics into something beautifully unholy.
Yeah.
Here are two Grammy Award winners.
Sam Smith.
elijah schaffer
So we got the occult theme, right?
The circles.
kezia schaffer
Am I whispering?
I didn't see the whole video.
elijah schaffer
This is the best one that I could play because I felt like it's distorted enough that I won't get a copyright strike because we're like on the sides and the sound is messed up.
kezia schaffer
Everyone's pretty much seen.
elijah schaffer
I have a higher def one, but I felt like we'd get in trouble for it.
unidentified
Fair.
kezia schaffer
Well, I've got goosebumps.
And the bad kind.
elijah schaffer
I have to not get copyright striked here.
kezia schaffer
All having sex on the floor.
elijah schaffer
Yep.
Eroticism.
In bondage, like in jail.
kezia schaffer
It's actually really cool to be in prison.
I don't know why people don't want to go to the bottom.
elijah schaffer
Why are you yelling?
unidentified
Me?
elijah schaffer
Okay, I can't play any more of that before this channel gets taken down.
kezia schaffer
But we've all seen all the bits.
elijah schaffer
Well, I'm assuming MJ might not have.
kezia schaffer
Oh, maybe MJ didn't.
elijah schaffer
So I play it for the people who haven't seen it.
I do bring this up, though, which is interesting.
Like, we're not like Owen Benjamin here or like another show where we're necessarily going to break through the barriers and press into things that you've never heard before.
Like those people are all great and they have their own thing.
We are semi-mainstream on the show in the terms of just like what we cover.
But we will give you an interesting perspective.
And that's the fact that people pretending to be upset by this are retarded.
Like Lucifer was the angel of music, right?
And he was the head music master.
The Grammys is like the way the devil programs people is through the television, through the Grammys.
I consider this to be like an anti-Satan show.
We're like anti-antichrist.
Like we are against Satan.
We are anti-devilers.
We are against devil man.
This show's anti-devil.
But it's like the real programming that the devil does isn't through a cult.
This would just be, I would consider this to be like a seance, like the devil just unashamedly being like, yeah, this is my worship.
This is my temple.
This is what I do.
But the programming, I mean, the song's called Unholy.
And it's a catchy song.
I never knew it was called Unholy.
And I didn't know it was from Sam Smith until like a month ago.
But it's a very, very, very catchy song.
And that's the way the devil works through programming is that we oftentimes like we just hear things.
It's repetitive.
And that's the way the lies of the devil work.
And if you're not a Christian, that's totally fine or you don't believe in God.
But here's the truth of how the devil works, whether you believe in him or not.
Is the devil doesn't always just go into your head and say like, kill yourself, kill yourself, which he can.
I would say that those are like demons that might bother you and might implant thoughts into your head and might try to get you to harm someone or like, you know, those crazy thoughts that you get in your head that you're like, where'd those come from?
Those could be demons, but the devil's not omniscient, meaning he's not omnipresent.
He's not everywhere.
He's not in everything.
He's a solitary being.
So the devil's not going to do his bidding by like walking around into your ear.
And I think people give too much credit to the devil, like, oh, the devil made me do it.
It's like, no, the devil's one being.
The way the devil's going to promote his prowess and the way that he's going to actually influence society and culture is going to be through a repetitive, subtle, and also like, I would say pretty straightforward messaging that doesn't just go into your head like, hey, become a homosexual and hey, just be unholy.
It's like, it's reinforced through your television, through the banking system, through usury, through the hustle culture, through the idea of music.
And you're programmed to think that life is about the bitches and the money and the hoes.
And I only separate the bitches and the hoes because they're separate.
But you go through and it's like, it's like, this is not the ultimate satanic worship.
This is a expression of an open, like, we are Satan's pawns.
But the whole system is meant for you to be focused on yourself, to be negative, to have, you know, internalize everything and to crush other people to get ahead, to lie, to cheat, to steal.
This is what it's about.
We're all fallen.
We're all sinners.
I'm not better than anybody else.
But I think it's dumb for like the supposed religious right that I see on the internet to be like, this is evidence that Satan's in control.
And you're like, nah.
Everything else is evidence.
This is just like, if this is what it took for you to think Satan was in control of things, you're retarded.
You're just, you're not awake.
You're a grifter.
Which everyone is.
kezia schaffer
It's just like when he throws potties every once in a while.
elijah schaffer
Yeah, but I just meant like it's like it's like dumb when people are like, this proves the devil's in control of these.
That's what it took with Sam Smith with demon people, doing eroticism.
It wasn't everything that you've seen.
kezia schaffer
Right.
elijah schaffer
It wasn't everything.
kezia schaffer
It wasn't even like the song.
Like when people originally heard this song that he's singing and performing, were they like, ah, he's singing about being unholy.
The devil is at it again.
It's only when they do the performances where they do everything, but they'll play the song and listen to it.
And even with music, it's like people aren't just going to come and be like, you should do drugs and sleep around and blah, blah, blah, do all this sort of stuff.
You can't really sort of get people to copy you when you say that.
But when you sing it, you can get people to literally sing.
I want to do, do you know one song?
elijah schaffer
Hunter Biden's laptop.
kezia schaffer
Yeah, I want to do hot.
Oh, there's that one song that I like.
I do like it.
Lana Del Rey.
All I want to do is get high by the beach.
unidentified
And I'll sing it.
elijah schaffer
Not a bad idea.
I'll sing it.
unidentified
About getting high by the beach.
I'm not doing drugs, but I'll sing about at least for the time being.
Somebody said Elijah's jaw is getting pretty jaw-y today.
kezia schaffer
But it's like you can, you'll just like start singing these things where you wouldn't automatically be like, oh, let's go and get high by the beach.
But I'll sing about it.
Or like, hey, like, why don't we go do something unholy and be badly behaved?
But I'll sing about it.
I'm guilty too.
I'm guilty too.
But I just think that it's easier to get people to say things out loud that if you just say it like you're talking, like, oh, let's go and do drugs and like just strip our clothes off and just like dance naked and just like open our bodies up to just like sleep with anyone and everyone.
People would be like, oh, I don't know if that's a good idea.
But if we all sing about it together along with the song, no one says anything about that.
elijah schaffer
No.
No, they don't.
kezia schaffer
I don't really know if what I was saying made sense, but I hope that did make sense to some people.
elijah schaffer
Yeah, it did.
kezia schaffer
I just think it's easier to get people to agree with you or say what you want when it's through a song because you don't realize what you're declaring and saying.
elijah schaffer
Right.
kezia schaffer
You do a nice little tune.
elijah schaffer
Well, yeah, that makes well that makes a lot of sense.
So, um, so what's crazy, though, is as we jump into this, though, because I do want to bring up the fact that the Grammys are in this position to where it's not that they're just satanic, it's that it's just further evidence of what's actually been going on in the world already, right?
So, it's like we, it's not really, and this is why I don't like when people are like, oh, it's so shocking.
How is this shocking?
This is what's shocking to you.
Um, I do want to bring up something really important, though, that is vital for you guys to remember.
Um, there's an incredible sponsor of the show called Four Patriots, and Four Patriots is essentially not only preparation food, but it is an American business that only employs Americans, over 200 employees, that has food that lasts 25 years and is of the highest quality ingredients.
Now, many of you guys know not only are we being told consistently that food is going to be more and more expensive as we're seeing prices go up, so now's the time to invest in stock and food preparation.
You don't want to be left without food.
There was a freeze in Texas even recently: 250,000 people without power, grocery stores.
Some of them had to empty their shelves because the refrigeration went out.
It's not ridiculous.
I know people who have even had to live on prep food when they didn't have money for groceries.
And so, their food is amazing.
It's delicious.
And I encourage you to check it out.
Go to 4patriots.com.
That's the number 4, P-A-T-R-I-O-T-S.com.
Use my promo code OFENSIVE, O-F-F-E-N-S-I-V-E to get a discount right now.
The link's in the description.
What you're going to do is you're going to go to their website, you're going to check this out.
You can check out everything they have to do.
They have the best-selling four-week kit, 80 servings.
You can get the ultimate no-prep food bar, which is amazing.
And of course, you can shop everything that you want.
They also have storm prep stockpile and amazing other essentials that you can check out.
They're a family-owned business.
They're a small business.
And so, if you've been waiting to make the jump to actually get the prep food that you need and to store that in the time, don't be desperate when it's too late.
Go to 4patriots.com, promo code offensive, stock up.
And if you already have some prepper food, you should be buying more because it lasts 25 years, which is older than most of the girlfriends that were accompanying the dates at the Grammys there for the 50-year-olds.
That's just absolutely true.
So, check it out.
Go to 4patriots.com, promo code offensive, get the prep food today, check it out.
So, I want to bring up something that is mighty, mighty, mighty, mighty fun about the Grammys that continues to.
There was somebody that was absent.
Does anybody know who that was?
Oh, the guy who we demonize all the time.
kezia schaffer
Jesus?
elijah schaffer
No.
kezia schaffer
Oh, Kanye West.
elijah schaffer
Right, because Kanye thought...
kezia schaffer
Was he invited even?
elijah schaffer
I don't, I doubt it.
But realistically speaking, I think he was like the fourth most played artist, I think.
And he's been nominated and or won Grammys pretty much every year, nominated or won.
And remember, everybody says this is the evil guy because he said that he saw some good in Hitler, which, to be fair, if you're going to say Hitler's bad, but then praise the devil, then I just don't take you seriously.
kezia schaffer
Like, who do you think Hitler's inspiration was?
elijah schaffer
No, so it's like, so you're saying, no, you're saying Hitler is the devil.
kezia schaffer
Right.
elijah schaffer
But the devil isn't the devil.
kezia schaffer
Yes.
So like, who, like, everyone knows if we talk about the devil, that's got to be the most wickedest evil man who loves to kill and he's like, the prince of the underworld where he's just going to torture and stuff like that.
We love him.
We love him.
But Hitler is worse than the devil.
elijah schaffer
Yeah.
But Kanye West, you know, they've demonized everything about him.
And they've basically said, hey, we're not going to have him be a part of anything that we do.
kezia schaffer
Absolutely not.
elijah schaffer
We're not going to talk to him.
We're not going to have him be a part of our shows.
But he's the one that's doing the Sunday services.
And he's doing the opposite.
He's trying to praise Jesus.
And that's why they targeted him.
I do think he did himself a disservice, though.
Like, I get what he was doing.
And I've spoken to Fuentes and different people about this, is that I totally support what even Kanye is doing.
And I support what these people are doing.
They are fighters.
But also, we have to be really careful as children of God.
And this is myself included.
Sometimes I get so caught up in the humor of it and the joke and the bit and what's going on that I can lose the ability to be effective.
Now, of course, with studying the philosophers recently, refreshing and getting back onto some stoicism, Aristo the Challenger, who was somebody who really challenged, and I was talking about this on Twitter recently, he challenged the status quo of Zeno and the other teachers on their idea that there was a rule book to life.
Now, Aristo had a lot of good points on the way that he challenged the status quo.
But a lot of critics and contemporaries realize that if he had been smarter and not just erased the entire system and opposed the entire everybody, but he had played a little smarter and had a little more tact and played within the system, he could have caused more reform and actually had a better life if he had actually been smarter on how he resisted.
And so sometimes I think we don't resist very smart.
That's why people that are like, they boast.
I've been nuked off Twitter five times.
It's not a boast.
You should play smart.
And you could just get nuked off Twitter.
I could get nuked tomorrow for something stupid.
But we should be playing smart.
We should try to play.
We should try to play on as many fronts as we can and be smart because there's nothing smart about dying on a battlefield unnecessarily.
kezia schaffer
Well, choose the hill that you're going to die on.
elijah schaffer
Yeah, but literally, it's like, if you're going to die in war, die with honor, not because you're a moron who ran out of the foxhole too early.
If you're going to charge, you charge when you can win.
We're not in World War I anymore where we're just cannon fodder.
I refuse to be cannon fodder.
Anyone can try to make me cannon fodder and I won't be taken down.
You can't, you're not going to take me down because God's with me.
And if God is with me, who can be against me?
And if I get taken down, the only person in the world that can take me down is God.
And so if I get taken down and God wants me to go down, then fine.
So be it.
I may need to go down at some point.
And that may be his will.
And okay, whatever.
Fine.
Whether it's in death or online or whatever, I'll accept it.
But I know that I'm not fighting men.
I'm not fighting flesh and blood.
I'm fighting God.
That's where the Titanic people made a mistake because they said not even God could sink the Titanic.
But they never met Jewish bankers.
kezia schaffer
Exactly.
So.
elijah schaffer
They should have said, not even God could sink this ship or his people.
kezia schaffer
Yeah.
Don't.
elijah schaffer
I saw this.
There's like a random fresh article I saw from, I think it was from Snopes.
It was like, we're just refreshing this to let everyone know that it's a complete conspiracy theory that bankers sunk the Titanic to get rid of heirs to world banks and funds.
And I go, I didn't really know.
Why do we need to remind people of this?
Was this such a normal conspiracy that we need to do?
kezia schaffer
I didn't realize that was like a big thing that people were talking about.
Oh, I don't know.
I did watch that movie, though.
I didn't see anything about Jose Bank at all.
elijah schaffer
Oh, my gosh.
Yeah.
Yeah, you didn't see them because they're not the ones who pull the strings.
kezia schaffer
Uh-oh.
elijah schaffer
That's a conspiracy as well.
That's a conspiracy.
That's a big conspiracy.
Yeah.
One of my favorite things that I ever saw recently was, was like, I saw, I'm not going to mention who it is because I just don't want to cause, I don't want to, I'm not.
I'm not here for pettiness, but I'll just say this.
Somebody that worked for an organization on the right wing got invited to the Grammys and wore a Israeli flag purse and an Israeli flag ring and like posted pictures.
Like, I'm wearing this to the Grammys because I heard people are against Israel.
And I was like, ooh, you bet.
You rebel supporting Israel in the media?
Ooh, no one's done that before.
That's a first.
You're really breaking ground.
You are setting the example for everyone because God knows there's no Jewish people in media.
Yeah, but I thought really, really, really risky to carry an Israeli flag into the Grammys because God knows all those Jews that are not involved in that stuff.
kezia schaffer
Yeah, but wasn't that the whole reason that Kanye wasn't invited?
elijah schaffer
But I have no idea.
I just saw the picture.
It was like, I heard that people don't like Israel here, so I'm carrying this handbag.
And I go, huh.
I mean, I'm all for the sovereignty of every nation.
I think Israel has the right to be its own country and defend its borders.
I just don't want to fight their wars for them.
That's the difference between me.
But I just thought that was funny.
It would be like me walking into a Palestinian convention and I'm like carrying a Quran and I'm like, I heard there's some Muslim haters here.
And it's like, yeah, I don't know if carrying a Quran into a Palestinian event is really that brave.
But we'll give the credit where the credit's due.
Congratulations to whoever that was.
You're brave.
You deserve to be saluted.
That's why it's all just a grift.
It's funny to me, though.
I'm not even mad about it.
I just think it's funny that it was like, I saw that and I was like, shameless.
Shameless grifting.
I don't know what you're talking about, but I just thought it was a funny.
I just thought it was funny.
You know what I mean?
kezia schaffer
Did you laugh when you saw it?
unidentified
Yeah.
elijah schaffer
I thought it was a joke at first, but I guess it was real.
unidentified
Well.
elijah schaffer
Bro, I'm going to do something controversial.
I'm going to bring skis to the Swiss Alps.
kezia schaffer
Crazy.
That is crazy.
unidentified
Oh, that was funny.
kezia schaffer
So what happened with Kanye West?
elijah schaffer
They didn't invite him, I don't think.
kezia schaffer
Oh, man.
Well, I'm sure if they did invite him, I have a feeling he probably wouldn't have wanted to go anyways.
Or if he went, he would have caused a scene.
elijah schaffer
Can I also just say this, too?
like, how jacked up Hollywood is.
They had to, like, do the...
This is like the most awkward stuff.
This is why I don't even hate Hollywood because of Satanism.
I hate Hollywood because of moments like this.
This is what makes me hate them.
unidentified
No, I don't.
I don't have Dwayne Johnson here to write tonight, but I do have someone called The Rock.
elijah schaffer
Adele, meet The Rock, The Rock, meet Adele.
First time ever.
All right, you two get acquainted.
We're going to keep the show moving.
unidentified
And now, no, it's not.
kezia schaffer
So she always wanted to meet him or what?
I don't get the joke.
I don't follow these people close enough.
But I do like Adele.
I don't know really anything about her except that she's British and she has an accent and she's a really good singer.
elijah schaffer
Yeah, she's also woke too.
She's like a child.
kezia schaffer
Everyone's everyone is.
elijah schaffer
You know what?
By the way, somebody in the chat was like, bring back the drunk live streams.
This is the only show where if you follow this channel, you're going to get a different product every few months.
Like this show, it's like there's just a season where there's drunk live streams and they end, then you get nightly offensive.
And there was a season where it was the podcast and it was street videos.
This channel will ever forever be evolving.
You know why?
Because I'm just going to be the same person.
But I will tell you, do not forget, please, if you're watching this, this is not a joke, like a genuine call to action.
Genuinely consider signing up and joining us at Rumble because we get like half or more as many live viewers on Rumble as we get on YouTube.
And we have literally only 29,000 subscribers on Rumble and we have 540,000 on YouTube.
Nobody gets our notifications on YouTube.
Nobody gets the results.
We've been restricted on YouTube for a couple years now.
It's kind of like a dying platform in general, but we still use it and we appreciate the audience and everyone and all you guys that are there.
But it's like, make sure that you go here because I just never really know how long we're going to last on YouTube.
And I also know that YouTube long term, the show would be a lot better if it was only on Rumble because I could actually be myself.
I've been waiting for a moment to ever fully be myself.
I've gotten close when I dressed up.
I used to have a show and I used to dress up and stuff that was close to who I was.
But I want to get back to that.
And I want to have some good guests.
I have a good podcast coming up tomorrow.
We have an in-person, a very, very nice, fun guest tomorrow on Ho-Flation.
Which is the decreasing value of women with the increase of money and effort it takes to maintain them.
Ho-flation!
Bitch, step out!
All right, let's move on.
I can see you're really engaged.
kezia schaffer
Yes, I always get really engaged when you talk about that.
Like this.
Was this when you were your true self?
unidentified
What?
kezia schaffer
Go to locals.
elijah schaffer
Where is it?
Is it the most recent one?
kezia schaffer
One of them.
elijah schaffer
Oh, this?
Yes.
When I was my truest self.
That's the truest version of me you'll ever see.
kezia schaffer
Wow.
And the most modest.
elijah schaffer
That's why we can't have nice things.
That was very modest as I get.
No ass, no balls.
Just me and my god.
kezia schaffer
Your body looks serious.
elijah schaffer
Bro, I'm about to wear that into a Quran festival.
And it's going to be so controversial.
unidentified
Woo-hoo.
elijah schaffer
It's going to be so controversial wearing a burqa.
Don't you love it when white women talk about stuff like this and then they put accents on things?
Like they put like a Mexican accent, but it's on like Arabic stuff that doesn't even make sense to be like, yeah, I was saying a burqa.
And you're like, I don't even know if they call it the burqa.
But we'll just call it the burqa.
kezia schaffer
Isn't that also gotta pronounce it correctly?
If you're gonna speak about someone else's Quran, you have to say Quran.
Face towards Mecca.
elijah schaffer
Mekaka.
Meka Pakaka.
unidentified
Now I feel like I'm mentally ill.
elijah schaffer
I need help.
I've lost a lot of weight.
I'm in good shape.
And my brain is.
No, actually, no, my brain feels good.
That's why they said bring back the drunk live streams.
I'm just not trying to get drunk on camera right now.
I got my shit together right now.
I'm feeling good.
unidentified
Woohoo!
kezia schaffer
Good for you.
elijah schaffer
Yeah.
I have my life together right now.
If I don't, drunk live streams may return.
kezia schaffer
Tree GSP, darling.
unidentified
That's really good.
elijah schaffer
Let's talk about a couple of other things.
I'll leave that for a future show.
I'll leave that for a future show.
I'll leave this.
unidentified
Oh, yeah.
elijah schaffer
Here are some other subtle things from other Grammys.
Like, remember, like this, like subtle snake serpent imagery?
kezia schaffer
No, I didn't watch any of the Grammys.
elijah schaffer
You remember this?
kezia schaffer
No, I didn't.
elijah schaffer
They're like, when has it ever been satanic?
And they literally have like a giant serpent.
kezia schaffer
I don't know if serpents ever represented like the devil or like bad things.
Oh, Taylor did the serpents.
elijah schaffer
Yeah, and I don't like Taylor.
And I was going to say, so this is another useless clip, but you know, I said the reason why I don't like Hollywood has little to do with anything more than the people are fake and gay, right?
Oh, and it got deleted.
The video I was going to show you.
unidentified
Oh.
elijah schaffer
It no longer exists.
kezia schaffer
You didn't save it.
elijah schaffer
No, I didn't save it.
So sorry.
I didn't.
I did bring this up, though, and I wondered if this is kind of interesting of like where we're at in our world.
This is an interesting discussion.
Lord Miles, a very cool guy, said that he went to Bumble, set the filter to Catholic, right-wing, something serious, 19 to 26-year-olds, and four results were in England on the dating app.
I thought it was white and unvaccinated.
We have different priorities.
I've always said, I find that I've always found like Latinas, you know, Hispanics, there's Filipinos are all, even some black women are very pretty.
They're all very pretty.
There's some Arab women who are pretty, like Persian women.
Persian women are beautiful.
But too crazy.
Like, people always joke about.
kezia schaffer
Persian women are crazy.
elijah schaffer
Yeah, oh, 100%.
especially once you've given them a nose job and then they get more attention.
Persian women are...
It's crazy.
Yes, it's crazy.
But I will say.
kezia schaffer
But don't you think they would probably be a little bit more traditional?
elijah schaffer
This is why people say, oh, let white, yes and no, but I'd rather have a traditional white woman.
Like, it's like, why am I choosing one or the other?
kezia schaffer
Like, traditional or literally.
If you, because it seems like it may come to this, would you rather, is skin color more important than tradition?
Like, would you rather a traditional Persian woman?
She'd be very beautiful.
Or a non-traditional white woman.
Probably just like your basic white American woman.
Classic.
elijah schaffer
So this is a would you rather?
This is like a, I have to choose.
kezia schaffer
Yeah, like.
elijah schaffer
Well, I would depend if there were white Persians, because there's like, there's like light-skinned Persians, and I do think they're very attractive.
But I, but I would, I would take traditional, a traditional value, but I wouldn't want to get involved in Persian culture.
That shit's crazy.
And to all my Persian audience, y'all are wild as fuck.
I had some Persian friends growing up, and I love you guys and everything.
This country is Persia, like chicken.
kezia schaffer
Turkey, is Turkey Persia?
elijah schaffer
No, we're talking about Iran here.
unidentified
Oh, Iran.
elijah schaffer
Iranians.
There's a lot of beautiful Persian girls.
kezia schaffer
What's Turkey?
What a turkey.
elijah schaffer
Armenian girls are pretty too.
Like, Armenian, right?
And that kind of stuff.
I'm just going to say this.
I just couldn't marry it.
Hot, but unmarriable for me.
I can't do it.
And that's what I was saying.
I need the lower, the docile demeanor of a white woman.
That's why everyone like, I do.
I just need like chiller and submissive.
kezia schaffer
Oh, Darling.
Okay.
Fine.
We get it.
unidentified
I'm docile, I suppose.
kezia schaffer
I'm a docile white woman.
elijah schaffer
But Turkey is the Turks, and they're having a rough time.
They've had massive earthquakes in the last 48 hours, and thousands of people have died in Turkey.
So that's not good.
kezia schaffer
I'm really sorry about that, guys.
unidentified
Yeah.
elijah schaffer
Someone said that's valid, Elijah.
You don't have to.
Yeah, but I love, but Persians, that's what's the hard part.
It's like forbidden fruit.
And by the way, I'll just say this: Persians are up 30% in looks once they get their noses fixed.
Because, I mean, it doesn't have to have a perfect nose, but I just meant like a lot of them have these crazy noses, and then they get a nose job, and then they can become bitches.
What's up with that?
kezia schaffer
I'm talking about my nose.
elijah schaffer
You look like your uncle, you know, maybe in the finance industry.
kezia schaffer
Yeah, that's good for you.
unidentified
Lucky.
Oh, I know.
elijah schaffer
Why do you think I'm still in the air?
unidentified
Yeah.
elijah schaffer
Who do you think my in-laws are?
unidentified
Yeah.
elijah schaffer
How do you think I stay doing what I do and say what I say and don't get kicked off?
unidentified
Maybe it's because docile white wife.
elijah schaffer
Maybe it's because my family still trades in cash.
Maybe it's a few coins.
People will never know.
People always ask me, are you Jewish?
Maybe I am.
And if I was, would that change your opinion of me?
If your answer is no, then get the fuck out of here.
unidentified
I'm just kidding.
I might be.
elijah schaffer
I might be a little Jewish.
kezia schaffer
Yeah, would it?
unidentified
What?
kezia schaffer
Would people be upset if they knew I was Jewish?
Oh, that's crazy.
unidentified
We have too many jokes.
kezia schaffer
That is crazy.
elijah schaffer
Too many Jew jokes this show.
kezia schaffer
We just can't stop just cracking up.
unidentified
just can't stop just laughing about it on to the next thing on to the next thing On to the next thing.
This is like, I do love doing these with you.
elijah schaffer
I get always stressed before these because I have to do everything.
Like, I always have to do all this shit and get everything ready and thumbnails.
But it's like, but I really enjoyed this because there's so much less drama and like less problems like flying people in and everything right now.
And of course, like, you know, I'll get back to that and have some in-person guests that are coming in because obviously a little bit far away from some guests to come on the show.
And I hate digital interviews.
I've been doing some.
Digital interviews are so gay.
They just suck.
They just, they're just horrible.
And I do them, but they're just not the same.
I just like talking to people in person.
It's way better.
Guys, so I want to tell you something very important.
So many of you guys know that you might have lost some of your testosterone over the last several decades.
And there is a company called VShred that is out there that is helping you provide with this Test Boost Max.
That is this amazing formula that can help you increase testosterone levels if you're in your 30s, 40s, 50s, or 60s.
Now, it has incredible ingredients inside of the product, including cord mushrooms, ashwagandha root, and tribulus terrestrial, which is known for its side effects and gains in suppressing cortisol, which cortisol production can be a huge reason why you continue to spike levels of stress and then you don't develop the muscle gains that you desire.
Now, there's many different things that go into place, but you might want to chill out a little bit.
You want to get your test levels up.
So many of the great examples of this would be make sure you're getting sunlight.
Make sure you're going outdoors and you're actually getting that vitamin D. Make sure you get proper sleep.
Make sure that you're getting, you know, seven to eight hours of sleep a night.
You're going to the gym about four days a week is a pretty good median there.
Better if you can go five, but three is okay.
And of course, you might want to try Test Boost Max as well as their fat burning formula that you can get, which is called Burn 2.0 for free right now when you go to vshred.com slash elijah.
So that's vshred.com slash Elijah.
It's for a $67 value.
Get that included in.
Check out their product today, the Test Boost Max and also the Burn 2.0 at vshred.com slash Elijah.
V-S-H-R-E-D.com slash E-L-I-J-A-H.
You can check it out right now and see what happens.
Feel stronger, feel more focused, have more energy and vitality, and maybe even feel like your younger self again.
Check it out and see where it is.
There's zero risk to try because you're also protected by the company's lifetime guarantee.
And if for some reason it doesn't work for you, you can get your money back.
So that's the key thing.
Like I say with all our products, is they either need to have a lifetime guarantee and or the money back.
So if you don't like it and you try it and it doesn't work for you, then let them know and they'll give you your money back at vshred.com slash Elijah.
Click the link in the description and check it out.
So, and I like, by the way, I do that with companies.
So you guys know this.
I don't know if people know this.
If a company wants to advertise on the show, and if I haven't used their product extensively or something happens, then I require them to give a money-back guarantee.
And or if it's a product, they have to give a lifetime guarantee, which would be money back.
They have to be able to replace the product if it's shit.
Like, meaning, so if there's something like for women, let's say if it's like a some thermometer for women's fertility, and obviously I've never used a woman's thermometer for fertility, but the only way I would then use that is if, A, if I didn't use it, which I didn't, then you'd have to get a money-back guarantee and or you would have to get a lifetime warranty that if it broke that you could get it replaced.
And I will always do that because I don't believe I have to make sure that that's the case with everybody that's on the show is that's the same thing.
And that's why the four Patriot, they have the 25-year guarantee is pretty good to me.
It's like life.
If you have a product for more than 25 years, it's pretty good.
The dog food as well, they back their product as well.
And that's a new sponsor that we have for the month.
And so they give the same guarantee.
So check it out.
And also, too, Locals is guaranteed for life.
It's got a life.
And by the way, it's vegan.
It's vegan friendly and high in protein.
Locals is high in protein.
kezia schaffer
Well, since it's vegan.
unidentified
All right.
elijah schaffer
Speaking of this, let's get into some more stuff.
So I want to, this is also super gay, but I also thought this was so funny.
You know the balloon that everyone's freaking out about?
kezia schaffer
The balloon?
unidentified
That was really big news.
elijah schaffer
I love this video when you hear people in the background talking, like talking from Fox when they blew up the balloon over the ocean.
Like, it's one of the funniest things because to me, this sounds like what the internet was if it had a voice.
Like, you know, like you see a meme, and this is what I hear when I see the meme.
Listen.
unidentified
Earlier during an off-camera press briefing with reporters, the top general for NORAD in North America admitted the U.S. military did not detect the earlier Chinese spy flights during the Trump administration.
John Kirby also spoke earlier with reporters.
I can tell you that we...
elijah schaffer
Wrong video, but...
kezia schaffer
Was that supposed to be something?
elijah schaffer
No, I have another video.
I have another video.
I have another video.
Yeah, it's like everyone's like, everyone's watching it, and they're like, oh, you blew up the balloon.
unidentified
Oh, yay.
elijah schaffer
And they're all cheering for the balloon being blown up.
And it's like, oh, here, let me bring this up.
I wanted to bring this up right here.
Do you remember this?
Do you remember this tweet?
When he threw his Grammys in the toilet and pissed all over them, Kanye West?
No, I. That's probably why I didn't get invited, to be completely honest.
He took his Grammys, urinated on them.
unidentified
How long ago was this?
elijah schaffer
Like, I think it was like two years ago, right?
Or last year?
Two years ago?
It might have been two years ago.
He peed on them in the toilet.
So.
kezia schaffer
I think he doesn't care about the Grammys.
I think that's the message he's trying to send.
elijah schaffer
I think that's the message he's trying to send as well.
I think I wouldn't know exactly what he's trying to say on that.
kezia schaffer
I would put that as something.
elijah schaffer
Let me see something crazy.
Okay.
So I'm going down here real quickly to this.
I did want to talk about a few other things that I thought were pretty phenomenally important in what's actually going on in our lives.
But I did want to just bring up this one thing really quickly, which is the meme that I like that I think is a boomer meme of the day and is very interesting, though.
Let me see if I can get this up here.
Boomer Meme of the Day.
I still can't believe we're living and not in a simulation.
This is a real world that we live in.
This is what's happening.
I do enjoy boomer memes a lot though.
And so if you ever want to send them to me on Twitter, I appreciate it.
Those are balloons, spy balloons, knocking down our president.
We knew it was going to be a bad few years.
But I bring this discussion up, and I want to talk about a little bit about the presidency and some crazy stories that are happening, including they're letting transgenders into the world surf competition.
And I also want to look at a couple fight videos that I can't show on here that are from certain individuals who have a certain month that we have going on right now.
unidentified
Ooh.
Yes.
elijah schaffer
So we're going to move completely over to Rumble for this because these opinions are a little bit too spicy for the interweb.
So I just put the link to the Rumble.
Let me go ahead and get this in here.
I just put the link to the Rumble in the chat.
You can go ahead and go to rumble.com slash slightly offensive.
It should be in there.
You can go to rumble.com slash slightly offensive.
I put it in the chat.
You can head over to Rumble right now, and we're going to end the conversation here.
Someone said, Whoa, already.
We've already been going for one hour here on YouTube.
Yeah, and so we're going to go over and we're going to finish the show.
We're going to do the rest of the show on Rumble.
So I encourage you to check it out and go click the link to Rumble.
I'm going to go ahead and stop it for all my people.
Why don't you hit the falsetto so we can do the transition here?
unidentified
Got her talking like this in a falsetto.
elijah schaffer
What's up, Rumble?
What's up, locals?
Where are we at?
Where are we at, Rumbles?
Where are we at, locals?
Where are we at?
Let me say if we killed this stream here in YouTube and we killed it.
Did we kill it?
Yes.
Live?
All right.
unidentified
Yep.
kezia schaffer
Also, that looks like a delicious pizza.
elijah schaffer
Yeah, so we're back.
Okay, so let's talk about this.
So number one, there's some pretty crazy stuff that I saw going on.
It's Black History Month.
I think Wednesday we'll do a Black History episode probably.
But one thing that I did notice that is like pretty remarkable is just the sheer amount of like reasons why nobody cares about black history.
It's like, why do I care about the black past when every day I'm confronted by the black present?
unidentified
Oh shit, I got the plate.
elijah schaffer
San Francisco.
unidentified
What do you want to know with the favorite reasons?
elijah schaffer
They're in probably a stolen Mercedes.
unidentified
He's literally to this one.
kezia schaffer
Why can't he pull his trousers up?
I just don't understand that.
elijah schaffer
Yeah, like they're going to do anything that's probably a stolen vehicle.
But it's like, it's really hard for me to enjoy black history and look at this stuff when I realize like I can't enjoy the past and enjoy that like, you know, the overcoming of slavery or different things when the present condition to me is no better than it was.
unidentified
What was your favorite in your favorite moment from black history?
elijah schaffer
I like how black people took credit for inventing peanut butter, which I still don't believe and that's full of shit.
Like as if a guy, a black guy, invented peanut butter.
kezia schaffer
Try to be, I wanted a not unique.
No, what I'm doing.
elijah schaffer
That is my favorite.
That is my favorite in textbooks.
But can we just be honest when you hear that?
They're like, by the way, it was a black man who invented peanut butter in 1783.
And you go, okay, stop for a second.
Marzipan, which you just apparently learned about today.
kezia schaffer
I didn't.
elijah schaffer
About like paste from almonds.
kezia schaffer
Oh.
elijah schaffer
So we've had like marzipan in Turkish cooking forever.
We've always been smashing up almonds.
We've had pistachios used in pistachio cream.
We've had almonds.
Brazil makes a paste with Brazil nuts.
We have walnuts and they've had walnuts.
We have walnuts.
But peanut butter, it wasn't until a couple hundred years ago that a black man was like, oh, them peanuts.
And then Smash was like, the blacks invented the nut.
Smash.
kezia schaffer
Like, I don't want something.
Come on.
unidentified
Nobody have it.
elijah schaffer
Nobody smashed peanuts.
unidentified
They go, and then he smashed the peanuts and went, wow, I made peanut butter.
elijah schaffer
and then everyone's like, yeah, see, black people invented something and you're like, look, do I think...
unidentified
Darling, let them have the peanut butter.
They've not got much other things that they have.
kezia schaffer
What did they?
elijah schaffer
Rap music.
kezia schaffer
But listen.
elijah schaffer
But listen, we have a lot of black viewers.
I'm saying black people did invent stuff, but I meant they picked these stupid things.
Like, why not just be exact?
Like, why not be like, why not pick something cool and say, hey, do you know like the little clip on your zipper that makes everything easy and keeps your pants on so we don't have to wear belts?
Like, a black man actually patented that and made it that little piece.
Like, hey, that's actually that's great.
That's not true, though.
I think it was a Japanese YKK who did that.
I'm pretty sure it was Chinese.
But still, we'll give the credit to the black people for this one.
So, or something like that.
I might be making that up, but it's YKK.
I don't know.
unidentified
Anyone can invent anything, right?
elijah schaffer
Right, but what I mean is, like, why do they choose things like, hey, because you know, like, as a kid, you go, oh, I love peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.
You know that the black people invented your sandwich.
You're like, oh, let me go thank a black person.
Mom, there's a black guy.
Let's go thank you.
Oh, what is he doing?
Is he looking for sandwiches?
What is he doing?
Is he looking for a sandwich?
It's like, and I feel bad because, like, I have, I, I have, uh, I've had black friends.
I don't know if I really do.
I have black friends right now.
kezia schaffer
I have, yeah.
elijah schaffer
Oh, you, we have a black friend here.
Hey, that's the.
kezia schaffer
She's my friend.
elijah schaffer
No, she could be mine too.
The two shall become one.
I love black people.
Nobody loves black people more than me.
So the thing about this is that I find to be quite interesting is it's like.
It's like I just feel the a little bit of the of the scallywagness that we're always supposed to talk about black history, the bad things white people did to black people which, by the way, the Jewish people just getting into white history yeah, now you're getting into our white history, so and then you don't talk about the reality of the black situation.
Like I would rather have black.
I'd rather have it be like Black Rebuilding month, where we, like every white person goes and like volunteers in a black community and we all help like build up the inner city and like paint graffiti.
Like that would be you know what I'm saying like if it was like hey, white people, black people are ruining your cities.
Why don't you try to take pride in your city and help black, teach a black kid not to commit crime, or something like.
That's very awesome, I like that.
kezia schaffer
But with black history month, you've got a whole entire month to reflect on the history of black people and I'm just wondering what even is their history, because the only things that they talk about is this or slavery.
That's their number one topic.
You have a whole month, just have one day about this.
Like I'm sure you've got like hundreds of years worth of history, but why do you only talk about slavery parts?
And do you only talk about black history from when you got to the United States?
Or you go back and you talk about it from when you guys lived in Africa?
I just like want to know, because I never hear when it's like, oh, it's black history month, we're celebrating what's this?
Can someone tell me anything of their history aside from now, the peanut butter and the slavery, because I don't know anything else.
elijah schaffer
And look at this, this is a beautiful woman.
They said that.
I read that Lizzo she was my favorite thing was voted the most beautiful woman on the red carpet.
Wow, that's what I read.
kezia schaffer
I agree.
elijah schaffer
I'm not gonna deny that it took me like nine minutes to figure out if that was a chick.
I'm so petty I.
This is a selfie, and this is a small face in a selfie.
People want to know where this shit comes from.
Did this even go anywhere?
Nah, it didn't even go anywhere.
It's got what?
579,000 views.
kezia schaffer
But I've got to say though, I don't like, and this isn't because she's black, this is just like.
In general.
Everyone does this.
All girls do this hairstyle where it looks like you just got out of the shower and it's wet.
elijah schaffer
It's called a jerry curl.
And you we don't appreciate your racism on my show.
kezia schaffer
I don't know anything about it, I just don't like you're going to an event and a party And it looks like you just got out of the shower and your hair's wet.
I don't like that style.
elijah schaffer
I did want to watch a couple of these fight videos, though.
unidentified
Ooh.
elijah schaffer
So I put a lot of these videos.
kezia schaffer
I'm going to see kids get a lot of people.
elijah schaffer
Now, I used to get in trouble when I used to work for other people.
They used to get mad at me for putting up videos of black kids fighting.
I would like to put up videos of white kids fighting.
I just don't see them as often.
And I do put them up occasionally.
And this is when someone said, oh, you put them up because they're black.
And I always go, no, I put them up because they're young.
Because young, the youth are always at fighting.
I was just watching the other day, which we'll get to in a second.
Alice Springs has a youth problem.
Alice Springs has a, they said we have a problem with youth crime.
unidentified
Yeah.
elijah schaffer
Youth crime.
Now, look at this.
This is.
So this guy is, he's beating up a chick, and then he gets jumped by women.
unidentified
Hey, no, What the fuck?
Oh, shit.
elijah schaffer
Can I just say this, though?
Can we just like, this is what we were talking about on the last show about equity.
And I was talking about this too with Jasmine, my guest tomorrow on the hoeflation.
Is that you will immediately can tell that feminism is bullshit when a fight starts or any position where men need to defend women.
And I've, and I've, and I've treated feminists, I told her, I go, I've always treated feminists the way they've asked to be treated.
And guess what happens every time I treat women the way they ask to be treated?
Professionally, everything?
They get, they fucking hate you.
They become bitter.
They hate you.
And like, this is the same thing where women are like, you know, it's all equality, equity, everything.
And then it's like, then it becomes he hit a girl.
unidentified
Yeah.
elijah schaffer
Because you go, oh, shit.
Men and women are different.
Now, I actually almost regret the fact of treating feminists the way they literally asked me to treat them because the reality is I'm not going to like be in their delusions anymore.
Just like with transgenders, like, you know what I mean?
Like, call me a woman.
I'm not going to call you a woman anymore.
I'm not going to buy into your shit.
But anytime there's a fight like this, it's like, oh, hey, you know, we're all equal, equal opportunity, equal jobs.
And then it's like, the reality is he hit a girl.
And you should know, yeah, he can, look at this.
He beat the shit out of a woman.
And I think that's a woman.
unidentified
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
elijah schaffer
But I just meant to say that there's a lot of these kids, unruly kids in schools.
A lot of these unruly kids.
There are a lot of them in schools.
kezia schaffer
I don't believe in school anymore.
elijah schaffer
I'm not saying kids to school.
No.
I also love this too.
kezia schaffer
And this is the thing as well.
I feel like girls, women, girls, whatever, youths, all of them, women in general, I believe, are becoming more violent, physically violent.
And it blows my mind.
It really blows my mind because it's not our nature, but we're seeing it more and more where women, like, she hit him too.
And after he hit her, she came back for more.
If a man hit me, I would run.
I would not be like, I'm going to take him on.
Absolutely no way.
Because I don't want my nose to get broken and my hair to be ripped out.
I don't want that.
I'm not going to, like, I just don't, I don't have a violent streak in me where I'm going to beat the crap out of somebody.
elijah schaffer
Well, by the way, if you're on Rumble right now, make sure you click the link below and actually subscribe.
So make sure you actually hit the link and you sub.
So click that link.
And also there's a link down there where you can join the locals.
You can become a proud member.
You can support the show.
You can do whatever you want.
You don't really have to know.
It doesn't actually matter.
But you can support the show and it's really helpful.
You can join the locals chat, which we will read the super chats.
And you can also write now, if you want to, you can go ahead and you can leave some super chats.
Or what are they called?
Rumbles?
Rumbles on Rumble.
Some shockwaves, some turkeys, some turkey earthquakes.
And that's what we're going to be.
But also, Alice Springs, which is like the ghetto in Australia now, sadly.
kezia schaffer
Looks like the desert.
elijah schaffer
Right.
I just said the ghetto.
Alice Springs has a crime problem.
People are fed up.
And I want you to notice something about this footage.
They have a youth crime problem in Alice Springs.
Let's see all the mates that are causing the crime.
Hey, mate.
Yeah.
Lots of blokes.
It's lots of them.
It's all the images.
kezia schaffer
I don't think about Elijah's Australian actor.
elijah schaffer
That was British.
The blokes.
kezia schaffer
Darling.
unidentified
What?
elijah schaffer
That's how they all talk here.
Oh, yeah, mate.
kezia schaffer
He tries.
He tries really hard.
elijah schaffer
They talk.
I say, you want to be popular, yeah, mate.
That's how they talk to me out here.
I don't know what they're saying.
kezia schaffer
Give your ratings if you think that was good or not.
We'll let the people decide.
elijah schaffer
No, but I could do a good one.
kezia schaffer
Okay, come on.
Give us your best, and then we'll rate it.
Give your best.
Don't hold back.
unidentified
Don't be shy.
kezia schaffer
Don't be shy.
And be honest, guys.
I don't want to see any of this 10 out of 10.
Be honest.
Be honest.
elijah schaffer
Oh, here we go.
Gonna be popular, yeah, mate.
You got yourself a good burger.
They always say, you want to get a cheeseburger.
They always tell me, that's how they talk to me.
Oh, yeah.
It's going to take a little time, mate.
unidentified
It's not really the time or the place.
It's not exactly interesting.
elijah schaffer
That's how they talk to me.
That's how they sound.
kezia schaffer
I don't know if you guys are teasing by saying tens.
unidentified
It's got a big joke.
elijah schaffer
Yeah, it's 10.
They always say 10 or whatever.
kezia schaffer
Two out of 10.
That's more like it.
elijah schaffer
No, 10 out of 10.
kezia schaffer
No.
7 out of 10, it's like...
unidentified
Populized?
elijah schaffer
It's a get the crocodile out here.
This is how they talk.
kezia schaffer
Very bad.
elijah schaffer
No, this is how they talk.
And they always, sometimes they just, they just mumble.
Oh, yeah, you're going to get danger, mate.
Get the baits.
unidentified
To be fair.
elijah schaffer
Get the buggy in.
kezia schaffer
There's a lot of times where Australians will talk to me, and I'll just go.
elijah schaffer
That's what they say.
Get the bugger in here.
Yeah, mate.
And you go, I don't know what you just said, but yeah, sure.
Hey, which pizza's better?
unidentified
Oh, yeah.
elijah schaffer
You got the bar, yeah.
Little spots they in there.
Just get them right then.
And you just, I don't know what they're saying.
I just go, huh.
Hmm.
Yeah, just give me that shit with the cheese on it.
My wigger.
unidentified
Give me that shit with the cheese, bruh.
elijah schaffer
I can't wait to hear, can't wait to hear Jordan Peterson cry about Anon.
See, did you see his tweets?
It's like drug-fueled tweets.
What is going on with Dr. Jordan Peterson?
I'm not one to talk shit, but that guy's, something needs help.
His tweets have not made any sense recently.
He's been just crying on Twitter about random stuff, and I will probably never take advice from him ever again.
I've just seen right through his scam.
Like, it's, it's, since he signed on a Daily Wire, it's been just like, he doesn't make sense anymore.
He was just, it's just gotten weird.
Do you want to see what I'm talking about?
Okay, let me go to Alice Springs.
unidentified
Watch this.
elijah schaffer
This is Alice Springs.
unidentified
Now, tell me how this is right when you have four females working in a business, trying to earn money, support their families.
One of one of these females was a junior.
Just take that in for a minute.
A junior getting a starting life, willing to come to work, and she has a man coming into her.
elijah schaffer
The white person cleaning up everything.
unidentified
He's tried to walk inside our business with a hammer.
elijah schaffer
With a hammer.
unidentified
With a hammer.
kezia schaffer
Because we don't have a hammer.
elijah schaffer
That's how they say.
unidentified
Totally ridiculous.
Police were called.
They attended promptly.
Four wagons.
This guy had then been chased by the police up the hill.
But guess what?
They've taken the hammer off him, but he hasn't been arrested.
And he hasn't been taken into custody, and he's allowed to walk the streets again.
This place is so unsafe and ridiculous, it is unbelievable.
That's how serious everyone has taken all this.
You don't even take someone that walks into a business with a hammer.
elijah schaffer
What do we notice about the same crime problem in every Western country?
There's a similarity to the crime problem we see everywhere.
And that is what?
They're young people.
I've always said it.
It's the young people committing the crime.
It's like we have a hammer.
And I like how Australians try to take it seriously.
Like, this is like a Tuesday in San Francisco, but it's like, we have a, this is totally, he goes, this is totally unacceptable.
He goes, you know, they always go, unacceptable?
You know, they always get up really excited.
He goes, but he repeats it like 10 times because they don't have guns here.
kezia schaffer
Drop a couple of acceptable.
elijah schaffer
Unacceptable?
Yeah.
He says, hammer.
And I like how they say this like it's a big deal because they don't have guns, so it's always like they came in with a machete.
A hammer?
A hammer.
And you go, what's that?
That's how my mouth be like, what's a hammer?
And I don't know what they're talking about.
I'm like, is this a hammer?
Like in my Dodge, the Hemi?
Is it a ham sandwich, a hammy?
And they're like, a hammer.
Hammer.
You hammer the nail?
Hammer the nail.
unidentified
And you go, oh, hammering nails.
elijah schaffer
A Pelosi stick.
unidentified
When you went to get taxed to put up the...
elijah schaffer
Oh, yeah.
All of my disagreements with people.
I feel like I'm fighting people out here because we don't understand each other.
And it's like, I go in an office supply store and I'm like, yeah, hi.
Because I needed to put up this background.
And I'm like, which, by the way, this is like, I just have this up right now because I'm just chilling out here with family.
And so I'm like, hi, I'm buying like, I'm like, can I please get some tax?
She goes, hmm, tax.
unidentified
I'm going to do your taxes.
elijah schaffer
No, no, no.
unidentified
She goes, I don't know what that is.
elijah schaffer
And I go, yeah, tax.
Like, you guys know tax at the office supply store?
unidentified
And she's like, tax, like your income, like with the government?
I was like, no, like, tax?
elijah schaffer
Like, you stick in the wall?
unidentified
Hmm, yeah.
elijah schaffer
Is it like, you know, like the little things with the spiky things, you stick them in the wall.
Oh, yeah, film tax.
Yeah, I thought you said tax, like taxes.
unidentified
Like you were talking about doing your government income.
elijah schaffer
I was like, nope.
Nope.
You don't think I walked into a fucking shop and asked you to do my taxes?
I'm in an office supply.
unidentified
Oh, yeah, yeah.
elijah schaffer
Yeah, we used to have some of them.
I think we might have some in the back.
That's pretty good.
kezia schaffer
Yeah, or even the other day we had to do it.
elijah schaffer
See, I can't, I can't, it's like being drunk.
I can't do my Australian unless I'm arguing with something, so I'll be like, yeah, film takes, thumb takes.
kezia schaffer
Elijah gets back.
Anytime we're sitting on the balcony, even this guy like drives by and he's like, oh, creative power.
unidentified
Talking to Elanja.
kezia schaffer
Elanja's like, sorry, what?
What?
And they just kept going back and forth.
Elijah's like looking at me to help translate, going like, I don't know.
I can't.
unidentified
It just keeps going on and I'm just like, there you see now I'm sorry.
kezia schaffer
Have a good day.
unidentified
Sure.
elijah schaffer
And I'm like, dude, sir.
We didn't have a conversation.
I just go, yep.
kezia schaffer
You said it better than me.
unidentified
And that's what Crocodile Dundee is Crocodile Dundee says.
kezia schaffer
This is not enough.
This is enough.
elijah schaffer
Oh, yeah, Mike.
You see one of these taxes in here.
This is what I noticed with Australians.
They suggest unrealistic things.
unidentified
You know what I mean?
elijah schaffer
Like, it's like, like, when you just ask, like, like, the other night, like, hey, what's a good pizza here?
It's like, oh, yeah, the pizza.
But he was not even, he was not even Australian.
kezia schaffer
He was trying so hard.
elijah schaffer
British, trying to be Australian, which was British.
It's like, oh, yeah, he was British.
The tomato.
unidentified
The tomato is got a garlic kind of feet.
And it's got a crust that's, you know, buttery.
elijah schaffer
And it's got like basil.
And if you're into that, you're like, bitch, just, I just said what's a good pizza.
Like, I didn't ask you to break down the food pyramid of like macronutrients.
And like, they just take forever.
Like, this place, everyone's on, like, reduced in speed.
Everyone's chilling.
And also, one of the craziest things that I'll never get over here is how freakishly early everything shuts down.
The amount of restaurants that close at 2 o'clock here, 2 p.m. in the afternoon, open at 4 a.m., close at 2.
The amount of places are just, and like, literally, I tried to get a coffee.
All coffee shops close at 2.
You don't can't get coffee after 2.
It's like, I go, hey, can I get a coffee?
It's like, oh, sorry, mate.
We're closed.
And I go, oh, okay.
So then I go to this, this, uh, this, this gelada shop, and I ask, I was like, hey, man, do you know where I get some coffee around here?
Coffee.
They always question your question.
Coffee, yeah.
Coffee, huh?
You know, I was like, yep, I didn't say fucking taxes.
How about that one?
So then you go, oh, can I get some coffee?
unidentified
And he goes, ah, yeah, it's 210.
elijah schaffer
I was like, yeah.
Anyone that sells coffee ought to shut down the shop.
They're probably at the beach hanging out, you know, drinking beers with the boys.
kezia schaffer
Why wouldn't you want to be at the beach?
elijah schaffer
And I go, so you're telling me everyone gets off work at two?
Honestly, just a coffee, you know?
Like, I'm like, do people not drink?
I don't know.
It just blows my mind here.
There's places that serve dinner and it's like, we close it at 5:30.
He's like, this is dinner?
So we're eating dinner at 3:30.
I'll never, and that's like opposite of Eastern Europe.
Like, the late dinner is super late over there.
But everyone here just goes to the beach and everyone just gets sun, calabanga, dude.
kezia schaffer
Yeah.
elijah schaffer
It's pretty crazy.
kezia schaffer
You can tell Elanja really loves my country.
elijah schaffer
So I love the United States, but I also haven't seen my family in years.
And it's amazing to be around family.
And that's what people have asked, why am I traveling full-time?
What's going on?
Everything that's happening.
Well, I'm just traveling because I haven't been able to see family.
And if you don't know anything, it's also like very expensive to travel.
And it's also incredibly fun to see family when they can't get back in the United States.
I know they're supposed to drop it on Wednesday.
We didn't know that, but family that's unvaccinated could not visit.
So we haven't had any opportunity.
We haven't seen family in years.
And my mom's dead.
So it's kind of nice to be around some family that can support us and love us as we support them and love them.
There's nothing like that.
It really is true.
Someone said, I don't drink, I drink coffee until 3 p.m. sometimes.
Yeah.
Everything though.
Can I just say this?
Also, last thing.
My favorite thing is like Amazon Prime.
Fast shipping is like nine days.
And then you buy something for $30 and it's $55 for shipping.
That's the best thing here, too.
Where it's like, it's like you go somewhere and you go, hey, do you guys have anything in stock?
Yeah, we do.
Where is it?
Oh, it's in the BIC.
Can I pick it up?
No, we'll deliver it.
Oh, okay.
When are you going to deliver it?
How does March 15th?
And you go, March 15th?
So this is 15 minutes from my house.
Why would you deliver this in March 15th?
I don't know, mate.
We kind of backed up.
But you've got it in stock?
Yeah, but you can't deliver it till March 15th?
Yeah.
unidentified
And it's like, they can't get you anything for like a month.
elijah schaffer
We need that's, I guess Mexicans aren't making sense.
kezia schaffer
Yeah, there's no reason.
And we have really strict rules.
elijah schaffer
There's less people in this country than there are in the state of Texas.
Just to let people know how few people live in this country.
There are less people that live in the whole...
It's a land mass, the size of the United States, and less people live here.
And everything's just spread out.
You're driving hours.
You just drive hours.
And it's just white sand beaches and coconuts and beer.
And that's like what everyone's chilling with.
And drugs are very illegal here.
So if you're into the ganjawanja, this is not the spot you watcha for you because you will fucking go to jail for like 10 years.
kezia schaffer
They'll send you to jail for anything.
They like they want to.
elijah schaffer
And they also do something new here, too.
They also do.
They also do, they have no like Bill of Rights.
So like how we have the, like, we don't have the right of search and seizure.
Like, you can't just like breathalize someone.
Like, you could just be driving.
kezia schaffer
Oh, really?
elijah schaffer
Yeah.
In the United States, you can't do that shit.
So here.
kezia schaffer
You can just pull people over.
unidentified
No.
elijah schaffer
So here, they don't need a reason to pull you over.
They can just, they can just be, have like a quota where they're just trying to catch drunk drivers.
You were not drunk driving.
They have no intention to pull you over.
There's nothing.
Your registration's paid.
They don't have to say, hey, so I pulled you over because I saw you swerving or something.
They could just go, it's 1.30 a.m., sir.
So I pulled you over.
Yeah, do you know what I mean?
kezia schaffer
They'll hang out in the back streets by a house.
I lost.
elijah schaffer
Do you know why we pulled you over?
And you go, what was I doing wrong?
Ah, nothing.
We're just trying to breathalize random drivers.
Can you please get, you ever used one of these?
kezia schaffer
And random times, like a two in the afternoon.
elijah schaffer
Yeah, they'll just breathalize.
They'll just pull you over.
The police will breathalize you and then be like, all right, yeah, mate.
You looks like you're clean.
You're like, well, yeah, because you fucking, because I was driving and I wasn't drunk.
So clearly, why would you pull me over if I'm not swerving?
I'll just check in to keep the streets safe, mate.
You're like, well, why don't you pull someone over that's drunk driving because you just ruined my day?
And then secondly, secondly, the speed cameras everywhere, the phone cameras, the surveillance, it's crazy.
It's like, I've never felt less free in my life.
I'm not even joking.
I've lived in LA.
I've lived in California my entire life.
I was born and raised in California, and I've never felt like so heavy-handed under surveillance where it's just like, it's scary.
There's cameras everywhere and everything's reported.
And like I was going to say, in the U.S., they do speed traps, like, you know, like the normal speed traps.
They do speed traps on highways here, like on freeways.
kezia schaffer
And also on, like, that's how.
elijah schaffer
Yeah, but I mean, like with speed cameras, there's speed cameras on the freeways, and they do side streets.
They go in unmarked cars in residential streets, and they just, like, and if you go past, like, if you drive past them and you go speeding and you drive home, they'll give you two tickets same day, and you get them in the mail, and you'll lose your license.
kezia schaffer
Just to be clear, I never did drink driving.
I never did drunk driving.
I lost my license a few years ago because you only have a certain amount of points on your license.
And every time you speed or whatever, do something, they take a point away.
And I had already lost a couple points from speeding, and then the cop was hidden around it, the back streets of my house, and I didn't come to 100% stop at the stop sign when there was no one on the road.
unidentified
So I lost my license.
kezia schaffer
I'm not like a crazy driver, but I am a woman.
I'm a woman driver.
unidentified
But.
elijah schaffer
Just want to remind you that this place is so police stady that during COVID, they shut down the borders between their own states.
Like the U.S. never got to that level.
We never shut down the borders.
You couldn't go into other states.
You couldn't drive into other states.
There was a guy who bought a car here and he bought it across the border because some of the towns here are split at the border.
I've never seen this before in my life.
The border just like cuts through a city and half is in one state and half is in the other.
Doesn't make any sense, but it's Australia.
And he bought his car across the road and then they didn't let him drive it to his house across the street because it was technically registered in another state.
And so they didn't let him.
So he had to return his car to the dealership during COVID and wasn't allowed to buy a new car.
And all the dealerships are on the New South Wales side.
And his home was in the Queensland side.
So he lived where there was no car dealerships.
And the only closest car dealerships were like an hour north in Brisbane, but he didn't have a car.
So that's unfortunate.
He doesn't have a car to get to the car dealerships.
And good luck getting an Uber out here because that shit also is not real.
kezia schaffer
Even when you live right next to the border, you could live in Queensland and your doctor and your hospital that you go to in your catchment area is in the other state.
elijah schaffer
So people couldn't go to see the doctor.
They literally couldn't, they couldn't travel to their doctor.
unidentified
They couldn't have a job.
kezia schaffer
They couldn't go to the doctor.
elijah schaffer
There was a bunch of places that couldn't work.
They were like, yeah, they lived down the street five minutes and they were like, you can't go into your office.
And it was like, why?
Because you're not allowed to cross borders.
And they couldn't go to work.
I talked to so many people that were like, I just couldn't go to work.
It's like you just couldn't get into work.
Even though it's across the street, you weren't allowed to cross the street to your work.
But it's also beautiful as it's one of the most beautiful places in terms of it's literally a paradise tropical land.
It's just shocking to me that these people, it's, you know what?
I guess it started as a prison calling and it still is.
kezia schaffer
Yeah.
elijah schaffer
It's very much a prison.
kezia schaffer
I guess, yeah.
unidentified
All right.
elijah schaffer
Let's see what we're doing here with some of these blooper chats.
We're going to the super chats.
We're going to the super chats.
Have you seen his gay cock?
Last spotted peckering in Elijah's backyard down under save the gay cocks.
Save the world.
unidentified
Wow.
elijah schaffer
That's Dorian.
That is Dorian.
kezia schaffer
Dorian.
elijah schaffer
I need to bring Dorian back.
I'll go visit soon.
kezia schaffer
Yeah.
elijah schaffer
That's the new gay flag.
kezia schaffer
Oh, that's actually a gay flag?
elijah schaffer
Yeah, it's the new gay flag.
It's the divergent gay flag.
Doomsday Cracker says, or cut its head off, that works too.
Also sent a picture.
See?
unidentified
Lucien?
kezia schaffer
Wow.
unidentified
Yeah.
Okay.
kezia schaffer
I always keep seeing that.
elijah schaffer
It's the all-inclusive gay flag.
kezia schaffer
Okay, I didn't.
elijah schaffer
Also, sent some more pictures.
unidentified
Wow.
kezia schaffer
What are these?
Why are you bringing a big duffel bag to the show?
elijah schaffer
This is my Italian friend.
unidentified
He's gay, me, faggotini.
elijah schaffer
Do you know why I like Rumble too?
You could say faggot on Rumble, but you can't say that on YouTube.
kezia schaffer
Really?
elijah schaffer
He's like, fag bag.
Clip me out.
kezia schaffer
Don't.
elijah schaffer
Call me a fag bag.
kezia schaffer
Lodge.
elijah schaffer
No, it's a cigarette.
A bag of cigarettes in Britain.
Yep.
Anyway, next.
Doomsday Cracker also sent this.
That's some gay shit, Elijah.
Do you know what I thought of a good shirt possibly?
I've got to get the shirts up.
I have a bunch of new shirts.
I need to get them up.
But I thought of this new good shirt that said, that said, slavery was big gay.
Isn't that a good shirt idea?
Slavery was big gay.
Yep.
Slavery is for homos.
kezia schaffer
This would be the best time to get it out during Black History Month because.
elijah schaffer
Slavery was big gay t-shirts.
kezia schaffer
Yeah, because...
elijah schaffer
I should just get a base picture.
Slavery was big gay.
kezia schaffer
Yeah, indeed.
elijah schaffer
I don't know who would buy that.
Would anybody buy that?
Let me see the chat says.
kezia schaffer
Everyone who wants to slay it.
elijah schaffer
Would anybody buy a t-shirt that says, that says slavery was big gay?
It's not bad, right?
Slightly offensive.
Slavery was big gay.
Smoke is a fag, they said.
Can I say dirty sodomite?
Maybe.
kezia schaffer
Who ran the slave trade?
Is it the usual suspect?
elijah schaffer
Nobody wants the t-shirt.
Okay, we're not, it's not happening.
We have this as well.
I don't understand this meme.
I never will.
I don't understand.
kezia schaffer
I don't.
I don't know that.
elijah schaffer
Hew white memes.
So traditionally, white women are all hay, no bargaining, Kez.
kezia schaffer
Huh?
elijah schaffer
Just a regular girl once again eating a banana.
unidentified
Wow.
Classic.
kezia schaffer
Beautiful.
elijah schaffer
Classic.
unidentified
Wow.
elijah schaffer
You know people that laugh like that?
unidentified
They go, that's just classic.
It's classic.
elijah schaffer
They whisper talk when they're laughing.
kezia schaffer
I don't know.
elijah schaffer
Why do you look at me like that?
unidentified
Huh?
Anyway.
elijah schaffer
How about this one?
Weather wither baroon.
Toy not aspiring.
unidentified
It's a red rubber baroon.
That's so good.
elijah schaffer
I loved boomers.
I was calling it the weather balloon on Twitter.
I was like, oh, you guys are angry at the weather balloon.
And they'd be like, it's not a weather balloon, you traitor.
It's a spy craft.
You're like, all right.
kezia schaffer
A spycroft?
unidentified
Yeah.
elijah schaffer
Doomsday Cracker sent this.
Africanitos, Dindu Muffins.
kezia schaffer
$100.
That's a steep price.
Dindu muffins.
I don't know what Dindu is.
elijah schaffer
I didn't do muffins wrong.
kezia schaffer
Is that a joke?
unidentified
Yeah.
kezia schaffer
Dindu.
elijah schaffer
It's a race called racism.
And we condemn it.
Condemn the racism.
Hugh White Meme said, I make cool memes to play.
unidentified
Lol.
elijah schaffer
Here's 100 Biden's birthday meme I made and posted on my Twitter.
This is a meme that he made.
Alright, so that's good.
Thank you so much for that one.
Doomsday Cracker said, You have nuts on a wall, you have walnuts, nuts on a chest, chestnuts, nuts on your chin, you have dick in your mouth.
What is this?
See, this is why I don't know if I want to put this one up.
No, I'm not going to put that up.
Thank you for the racist memes.
You can send them, but I probably won't play them up still, depending on what they are.
The George says, Kez, give us your best American accent, then give us your best Ebonics.
kezia schaffer
Oh, Ebonics?
elijah schaffer
American accent?
You got to try to do a pretty normal one without, like, don't give me the Valley Girl.
kezia schaffer
I don't think I can.
I think the Valley Girl is the best I can do.
unidentified
Okay.
kezia schaffer
Okay.
Oh, I hate being put on the spot.
elijah schaffer
You're selling me Dindu Muffins.
Hello, man.
How much are you Dindoo Muffins?
kezia schaffer
Oh, oh, my God.
The Dindu Muffins?
Okay.
This one is $5.
unidentified
That one is pink and delicious.
kezia schaffer
You want it?
elijah schaffer
I'll put my snake in your muffin.
unidentified
Yeah!
kezia schaffer
I can't do something.
elijah schaffer
What about your Ebonics?
kezia schaffer
Ebonics.
elijah schaffer
Okay, here we go.
kezia schaffer
You have to give me a test up because I can't think of it in my head.
elijah schaffer
Dando Muffin?
Dindu Muffin girl.
kezia schaffer
I don't.
I just don't know enough about that lady.
elijah schaffer
Shadi is not even there.
No one.
unidentified
I'm going to steal your shoes.
kezia schaffer
I don't know.
I got you, Ebonics.
I can't.
unidentified
I tried.
kezia schaffer
I tried.
unidentified
Oh, my gosh.
elijah schaffer
Oh, my God.
kezia schaffer
Oh.
Okay, what's next?
elijah schaffer
All right.
Primus sent a dollar in the Rumble.
Said, I need a woman who puts up with my shit the same way Sweet Kez puts up with the ledge.
She puts up with a lot of shit.
She's really a good wife.
Honestly, she's really a good wife.
To put up with anyone in this industry, most people in this industry are horrible.
But I will say this.
We have a lot of fun.
What?
unidentified
Spaghetti and Spews racist stereotype.
elijah schaffer
I tried.
unidentified
All right.
Well, that's the last time I give you anything you ask for.
kezia schaffer
Okay.
elijah schaffer
You can say the N-word in Australia, by the way, and people are not offended.
Maybe black people would be, but most people won't care.
If you're white, you can say the N-word in Australia.
That's actually true.
All right, more of the super chats here.
The George says, oh, that was the $5 one.
Oh, wait.
What the heck?
Oh, yeah, here you go.
Logos Rising said, God bless.
Calame said, you turn Kez, give us some accents.
So she did.
And George says, says Peterson feels slided by Dealy Wire.
Yeah, I know.
I just like burped.
unidentified
That was weird.
kezia schaffer
Did you?
unidentified
Yeah.
elijah schaffer
You know what that was?
You know what that tasted like?
kezia schaffer
Don't tell me.
elijah schaffer
That tasted like, I didn't drink any gin or anything like that, but it tasted like botanical gin.
I think that was, oh, it was the rosemary and salt from the grilled chips.
I tasted botanical salt.
kezia schaffer
We had a burger the other day, a chicken burger with like a peanut Some sort of like peanut sauce.
My sister was like, yeah, it's really good.
You should try that one.
So we ordered it and we were trying it.
elijah schaffer
It was vinegar sauce.
kezia schaffer
It was, I don't know, it was kind of like peanutty.
unidentified
And then Elijah's like, this tastes like alcoholic homeless man's afterbreath.
Yeah.
elijah schaffer
And you talk to a homeless person and you taste the alcoholism.
It's like, it's like, it's like you could, that, like, that, like, dry, like, six-hour-old alcoholic breath, and it, like, hits you, and you're like, whoo, that's bad.
That's what it tasted like.
And it's weird, but that's how I described it.
kezia schaffer
Yeah, and that was, I would say, an incredibly accurate description of how it did taste, which is upsetting that we both knew exactly what like an alcoholic, homeless man's breath tastes like.
elijah schaffer
I look like an alcoholic homeless man today.
kezia schaffer
Yeah, your head's a bit rough.
elijah schaffer
Let's see what we think.
What do you think about me just going on air with like rough beach hair?
kezia schaffer
A beach boy.
unidentified
Because this is like beach boy.
elijah schaffer
Rat in the waves.
unidentified
What's up, beach boy?
elijah schaffer
Oh, me?
I'm just slapping ass.
I don't know if that's how they talk.
No, they're out here like, slapping.
How about Carl?
How about Carl?
I know somebody who has the most surfer voice out here ever.
And he's not a pothead.
He just sounds like a surfer.
He's been cooked in the sun.
I love him a lot, too.
He's been cooked a little too hot.
Hot potato chip right there.
Alex Lindquist.
unidentified
What?
kezia schaffer
Is this really?
elijah schaffer
Alex List is starting to get the fam to watch the stream too because we all enjoy Down syndrome, racism, and locals memes.
kezia schaffer
Wow, the whole family?
That's rare to have the whole family into the same things.
unidentified
That's awesome.
elijah schaffer
Spaghetti Enwards said, sent this and said.
Me and the boys at the war crimes trial when they start presenting my memes on the screen.
Is that Nuremberg?
unidentified
I don't know.
elijah schaffer
And I think that's where we're at.
And then I will go here.
I think we're, can somebody bottle up and how hot and cute Elijah is and sell it?
I'd buy it.
Said Phoenix Fire 6.6.
unidentified
Wow.
elijah schaffer
We got $2 in Rumble today.
That's really, we're really moving.
We're moving.
Slapping ass.
All right, guys.
It looks like we've had a totally fun time today, and it's been a lot of fun.
I will say this, though.
You know, we have, I have a really good Hoflation episode coming out tomorrow that I'm really excited about.
I'm super excited.
And I have an original episode coming out Thursday as well that I'm doing on big tech exploiting children on areas.
Original research back to journalism.
I'm trying to get back in these good things.
I have some debates planned.
I'm getting back.
I've just been traveling, so it's really been hard to plan and schedule, but I've been doing a lot and been having a lot of good time.
You guys have been showing up every night.
We've had a consistent audience.
We've been growing on Rumble.
The locals, don't forget to join the community, has been growing.
We're almost at 5,000 members and almost at 550 supporters.
That includes one time.
We're like, I think we're close to 300 regular supporters yearly or monthly.
That's absolutely amazing.
The community is growing.
And that means within a year or two, we can continue to do whatever we want, say whatever we want, and maybe we'll be able to just be on Rumble and just have more unfiltered, unashamed, unabashed politics.
I feel like you guys are the most incredible group of loyalists in terms of there's not a lot of people just speaking their mind.
And of course, the devil's always trying to discourage us.
He's always trying to take our minds and to bring them into filth and to temptation and to degeneracy.
And you know what?
Maybe you are a degenerate.
We all have a little bit of that in us.
Maybe you are falling into temptation.
We all sin and fall short, but we got to still strive.
And I love that the fact about the SOBs, the slightly offensive backers, is that we're not claiming to be perfect.
We're not claiming that we've got it all together.
We're not claiming that we know everything.
We're actually pretty sick people and we're pretty twisted and we laugh at horrible shit.
But we are trying our best and we're trying to improve.
We're trying to do better.
And when we get it wrong, we try to improve and we try to move forward with our lives.
And that's like the strong value in all of us is that we're not on a high horse trying to pretend to be something we're not, but we're also not accepting our weaknesses.
We're not accepting our failures.
We're not accepting these things and we're trying.
And you can find more people like that in the locals chat, which is all the great people that are in there.
So I encourage you to check out the locals chat and join the community.
Huge shout out to our sponsors for today.
Don't forget that we had dogfoodexposed.com.
Get the dog food that you want slash offensive.
We also had forpatriots.com promo code offensive for the prepper food.
It's so important to check that out if you hadn't already.
And check out the test boost max and the burn 2.0 from vshred.com slash elijah if you want to get your test levels up and you want to get in better shape.
So that was dog food, 4patriots, and vShred.
I really appreciate it.
And sign up at locals.
Have a great rest of the week.
We'll see you tomorrow at 3 p.m. Eastern Time for a special podcast pre-recorded with an amazing in-person guest for the first time in a long time.
I haven't had them on the podcast.
I'm so excited.
Export Selection