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March 14, 2025 - Adventures in HellwQrld
01:20:47
Adventures in HellwQrld Present: Rogan and Carroll on Pizzagate

This week Mike and Eric listen to Ian Carroll and Joe Rogan talking about Pizzagate and we document Ian's tactics and how he runs his scam. Also we talk about how Rogan isn't really a neutral dude who is just trying to get to the bottom of things. Get bonus content on PatreonSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/hellwqrld. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Dere vet jo at når jeg skal ta opp noe vanskeligere på kontoret, så tyer jeg til en...
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The Adventures in Hellworld podcast talks in-depth about QAnon.
While it's meant to be comedic informative, sometimes we have to get into things like child abuse and violence against people.
Listener discretion advised.
Fair use is a legal concept that allows the Adventures in Hell World podcast to use content from others for the purpose of criticism of that content.
First Amendment, bitches!
Yeah, that's right.
We're doing the content proviso bump at the start.
I'm Mike Grains, a.k.a.
Poker and Politics.
This week, I am joined exclusively by Eric, the Deep State Operative.
The two of us are...
Go ahead.
Hello, everyone.
I am here in the hopes that we can beat Midas Touch as the number one podcast this week.
That's the dream.
Hey, Midas Touch, you platform Jim Stewardson.
Why don't you platform a non-crank on the anti-QAnon beat?
Platform us.
Or nuts to Eric.
Platform me.
Platform me, you idiots.
I'm way more articulate and not a grifting scumbag like Jim Stewardson.
I'd respond, but I had to pick myself up off the bus I just got thrown under.
I'll back it over you.
Yeah.
It is.
It's wild.
It's just wild how Midas Touch has a bit of grifty about them and immediately sought out the griftiest anti-QAnon promoter out there to be besties with.
That's not great.
Though I do have to say they have not had Charlie Kirk or Steve Bannon on yet, as far as I know.
Yeah, Gavin, Gavin, poor look, poor form.
I mean, again, the American electorate has the attention span of a goldfish, and no one's actually going to remember this shit in four years.
Right, yeah.
Still, still, I recommend not doing that.
I get the whole Buttigieg going in there in the lion's den and beating him up, but Buttigieg actually pushes back and stuff.
I haven't actually seen all of it, but Gavin is giving way too much ground to these people.
Someone was saying Bannon was screaming about 2020 being stolen and Newsom just sort of sat there blinking, not even reacting.
And it's like, buddy.
My guess is he's going for some kind of like...
He's trying to position himself as the center candidate, and he's hoping that he'll be able to scoop up some MAGA votes by bringing in these guys.
Whatever.
I mean, the thing that's so weird to me about all of this is that if we make it to 2028 and we have a Really Reels election for Really Reels, what are you trying to do?
Because America is going to be a dumpster fire.
You having a D next to your name is going to make you a 15-point favorite over J.D. Vance or Donald Trump Jr.?
Everyone's screaming right now about, oh, the Democrats are totally destroyed.
There's nothing going on.
Just think about that for one second.
Who do the Republicans run in 2020?
Name that person.
I see so many people telling me that Vance is some sort of erudite, sophisticated, intelligent politician, and he has anti-charisma.
The dude ran really poorly in Ohio.
He barely won the Senate seat in Ohio, which is now a blood-red state.
The Democrat who went against him.
People are mad.
People are like, dude, you had a winnable election and you blew it.
You could have won that.
J.D. Vance sucked.
So it's like J.D. Vance, basically all he had to do was win the primary and he was going to win the general election.
And he almost screwed the pooch and lost it anyways.
That's the one statewide election he's been involved in in his life.
And this anti-charisma weirdo, top of the ticket, in what's going to be a destroyed economy and a nation in absolute just revolt against its government.
That guy's going to be unbeatable.
People are like, oh, you're not seeing the set.
Oh, man.
They have Vince on top of the ticket.
Look out.
That guy's just, oh, he's a sharpshooter.
Oh, he's a quick draw in the old West.
Oh, it's like, no, he's not.
He's very bad.
He's incredibly weak.
So your options are like him, Don Jr., or the illegal Trump third term, which, Jesus Christ, we're already in hell if that happens.
I mean, honestly, I'll be...
I'll be just gobsmacked if he's even still alive in 2028. I mean, the man pounds cheeseburgers for a living and literally believes that exercise is bad for you.
So I think if he didn't have, you know, access to all the health care he could possibly ever want, he wouldn't even be around right now.
Oh, yeah.
I mean, that's the thing, is that Trump's health, between his physical health, because he's overweight, sedentary, and very old, And his mental acuity, because the man is senile, and our press ran Joe Biden out of the election due to the thought of senility, but actually senile Trump.
Pass.
They give a pass to that guy.
He can just be senile.
No muss, no fuss.
But yeah, it's super ridiculous.
Yeah.
I know, it's like...
It's like he's still living in tabloid world, Trump.
He's still in this area, this place where he's the Donald.
And isn't this wacky, the way he accidentally fired people researching Ebola?
I mean, what a nut job.
Come on.
Will Stansel said something to the effect of this a million years ago, and I agree, and I've been stealing it and using it myself, which is basically...
Hillary, Biden, and Kamala were running to be the president of the United States.
Trump was running to be the shouty man that makes the ratings on the TV go up.
He is never held to the standard the Democrats are held to.
Because when he said he was going to end the Russia-Ukraine war on day one in office, no one said to him, how?
How the fuck are you going to do that?
And absolutely nobody held his feet to the fire when he didn't do that.
Yeah.
Yo, Trump, I thought this war was going to be over fucking immediately.
Why is this still going on?
Why are you just putting the screws to Ukraine constantly?
And now he's just like, Marito, mumble, grumble, mumble, mumble, Russia good, Ukraine bad.
And that, though, the whole thing, the whole thing about, like...
The fact that no one in our press has ever said to him, yo, Donnie, why will you never criticize Putin?
Just, will anyone ever dare say that to his face?
Because it seems like that's an impossibility.
Yeah.
I saw this thread earlier today where they were talking about how Putin is very obviously not interested at all in a ceasefire.
All these manga were in there saying, oh, that was a mistake.
Now Trump's going to take off the kid gloves.
And I'm like, oh yeah, this is when he finally puts the rubber to the pavement on Putin.
He's just been playing the long game this whole time, and now he's finally got all his ducks in a row, and it's Vladdy's turn to face the might of Trump.
Oh yeah, we're finally going to do it.
We're finally going to put the screws to Putin.
Can't wait.
Oh God.
So silly.
Anyhow, this week we had many plans.
We had a lot of ideas.
And they all went out the window, basically.
Because my hero, my friend, bestie of the pod, Ian Carroll, a little while ago, went on the Joe Rogan experience.
And a lot of neo-Nazis were very upset that Ian didn't more forcefully push the Jewish question to Joe Rogan and all that good stuff.
Other people said, shut up, shut up.
We got a Nazi on Rogan.
It's good enough.
If you don't know Ian Carroll, basically his shtick at the start was, I'm just looking at the money trail, man.
I'm just fighting corruption.
I just go where the evidence and information takes me.
And I just report on it as an independent citizen journalist.
And that mask came off pretty quickly.
And he became a QAnon-adjacent right-wing grifter type.
And he was living that dream and doing those things.
And then in the final months of the 2024 presidential campaign, Ian decided to jump whole hog into a story about Minnesota governor and vice presidential nominee Tim Walz being a pedophile.
This started by a Twitter account called Black Insurrectionist, who turned out to not be a black guy and also not an insurrectionist.
Surprise, surprise.
Shocking.
Knocked me over with a feather.
So basically, Black Insurrectionist posted this incredibly fake email that literally had the cursor still on the screenshot.
So he typed it himself.
And like inconsistent timestamps and stuff.
Oh yeah, the timestamps were either military on one and then not military on the other.
I think they had like two numbers for the year in one case and four numbers for the year in another case.
Yeah.
So, this guy had a bunch of really obviously bullshit emails, allegedly from a whistleblower, claiming that Tim Walls assaulted them when they were a student and he was a teacher.
Ian Carroll jumped on this story, and then once the emails were definitively shown to be ridiculously fraudulent and Black insurrectionists seemed to be a bullshit artist, you would think that Ian would pivot away from this and be like, okay, this is dumb.
I'm just going to pretend I never did this.
But no, our boy Ian doubled down on this shit, doubled down hard.
And basically his story was...
Look, the emails are bullshit, but I talked to Black Insurrectionist, and he put me in contact with the whistleblower.
And I talked to the whistleblower on the phone for like 45 minutes.
And they seemed really sincere to me, so I'm going to take them at their word that Tim Walls is a pederast.
And notice what happened in that little span of information, is that Ian immediately...
Threw away the discredited evidence, which was bullshit.
And then presented new evidence, which was trust me, bro.
And rolled with this story even longer.
And then this alleged whistleblower never came forward.
No information ever came forward.
The thing died to death.
And Ian completely pretended none of it ever happened and moved right on to the next graph.
And unless you're a hardcore manga, you never even mention the...
Tim Walz pedophile thing again.
Oh, yeah.
Exactly.
It was just a big thing inside the hard-right community to, at the very least, call Tim Walz a gay, and then if that wasn't space enough for you, call him a pedophile.
So, our boy Ian has been floating around the white-winged grifter sphere ever since then, living the life of a right-winged grifter.
And somehow, someway, he became the apple of the eye of Joe Rogan, who brought him on the show.
And maybe if this pod does numbers, I might actually break down the whole two and a half hours or so of Carol Rogan commentary.
But what really happened here that you're going to feast your ears on is that they had a three and a half minute clip that went sort of viral online about Pizzagate.
And this is the bullshit versus debunk paradigm where we're probably going to do 45 minutes or so on this, trying to debunk three and a half minutes of bullshit from them.
Because debunking takes way more effort.
Bullshitting is real easy and creates impossible work for the debunker to do.
Especially since it works best if you keep things vague.
Oh, did you already hear the clips I'm about to play for you?
Oh, Jesus Christ.
Yeah.
That is the most important thing here, is keep it vague.
Make sure you're bopping around.
Dish gallop hard and throw a lot of things out.
And make sure that it's really hard for people to pin down what you're saying.
For those of you who don't know what a Gish Gallop is, there was a creationist whose last name was Gish, and his gimmick was to get evolutionary people, people who believe in evolution, to debate him.
And he would even volunteer to go first in the debate, which was always seen as a weakness, because you want to hear what the other person said and then be able to react to it.
But Gish knew what he was doing, which was...
They'd be like, Mr. Goshi, now you have five minutes.
And he would launch into bullshit and spout off like 30 ridiculous creationist claims.
And then when his five minutes were over, they would now be like, Evolution guy, your response.
And the Evolution guy now has five minutes to respond to 30 bullshit claims.
And he might get through like 10 of them.
But then the timer goes off and the moderator is now like, now on to this!
And Gish would be like, he didn't debunk 20 of the things I said.
That proves creationism is right!
And plus, a well-done Gish gala believes the other guy is so flustered that he can hardly speak for a couple seconds, which makes him look ill-prepared and unknowledgeable in his topic.
Right, because, yeah, this is the thing that I've mentioned this to...
People before is that when you are debating one of these lunatics on the internet, you are going into their playpen where they're going to say things that you have no idea what they are talking about, but they are well-versed in it.
Like, I had a guy coming at me about germ theory denialism, and I'm just sitting there thinking, what the fuck?
How am I supposed to defend germ theory?
I don't know this stuff.
And that's what they want.
They want to catch you in a situation where you don't know that topic in particular, and now they can claim, because you don't know that, they're right.
Which is not how reality works.
I don't need to know how germ theory works for germ theory to be true.
It's just true, because it is.
That's how reality actually works.
Like Neil deGrasse Tyson said, the great thing about science is that it works whether you believe in it or not.
And also, aside from not wearing a jacket, the gish gallop is Jim Jordan's claim to fame.
If he's on a subcommittee interviewing someone he doesn't like, he'll ask him like 35 questions in the two minutes he has, knowing that there's no possible way the guy will be able to answer maybe more than one or two of those claims.
Right, exactly.
And that's the point of this.
And you're going to, unfortunately, some of these clips are going to get redundant on that front.
You're going to get the whole three and a half minutes just chopped up into pieces so I can go over them as we're doing it.
But when Ian is not throwing his newest bit of evidence at you, he is just rapid fire, bullshit, bullshit, bullshit.
And that's the goal here.
To put you on the back foot trying to react to all of his nonsense.
That's the goal, that's the dream, and that's what he's trying to do.
So, without further ado, let's play the first clip, which is the opening of this stuff.
Rogan and Ian getting ready to talk about some Pizzagate.
Like, when they had that guy come in and fire up that shot.
I felt like that was a great way to put a halt to all the looking into the pedestrian emails.
So right away we're claiming that the guy that shot up Comic Ping Pong, Edgar Welch, the guy who died by suicide by cop recently, MKUltraSleeper, Deep State Plant, just that man's existence is now just thrown into a woodchipper.
If Steph was on right now, she'd probably have walked away from the computer and had to decompress for a minute or two because of the just the way they trashed this man and denigrated his life.
He's just literally a pawn of the deep state.
And weirdly enough, willingly went to jail and everything for 10 years and never once said, excuse me, I'm actually a patsy in all this.
Oh, he played the part very well.
Yeah, I know.
I love how these deep state guys have these They have like these Hydra-level dedicated guys who will toss off a catchphrase as they're eating their cyanide pill, you know?
That is, yeah, it's just that kind of thing.
When I was doing the 2000 Mules debunking and stuff, that's what I just loved so much about 2000 Mules was just the fact that they kept talking about how the people doing this, stuffing the ballot boxes for Biden and Harris.
We're just assholes looking for a quick buck.
But also apparently had fanatical loyalty to the Democratic Party.
Because if I wanted to make a lot of money, you want to know what I would do with my pre-filled out Biden-Harris ballots?
Drive directly to Fox News and become the biggest hero of the Republican Party imaginable.
And rake in my millions.
I was going to say, even if you weren't doing it for ideological reasons, just think of all the money you would make by blowing that whistle.
Right, exactly.
It's like, man, I really don't want Trump to be president anymore, but I would really like to make millions of dollars.
Oh, it's so close.
It's like, no, it's not really close at all.
Give me my millions.
So, yeah, Edgar Welch was just an unfanatically loyal deep state MKUltra sleeper who shot up Common Ping Pong, went to jail peacefully.
And then killed himself in a confrontation with police.
No muss, no fuss.
And he did all of this so you wouldn't look at the pedestrian emails.
And you gotta wonder why he waited 10 years to silence himself when he could have done it the first time they showed up with an arrest warrant.
Yeah, yeah.
At Common Ping Pong, he could have unalived himself.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, he could have just run out there with his gun still in his hand.
Yeah, he got a suicide by cop immediately, but decided not to.
You hear that, kids?
I'm hip.
I know what unaliving means, even though it's a bullshit term.
They don't fucking...
They don't demonetize you on TikTok for saying killed.
But hey, whatever.
Shine on, you crazy diamonds.
So, yeah.
And so we...
And I love the fact that they don't even name the guy.
They're just like, yeah, that guy that did the thing, you know.
Yeah, because, well, I remember, I think you mentioned this in a post earlier today, you know, not naming the guy makes it harder to fact check.
Yeah, exactly, exactly.
Don't name the person, because then you'd have to go digging into them and looking.
Now you have to Google Pizzagate shooter, and then you have to give their name, you have to Google again, and who has the time?
Who has the time for that?
I mean, that's the...
Yeah, why do that where you can just read a couple memes and get everything you need to know?
Right, exactly.
That's the thing.
Why dig for information when you can just be spoon-fed it?
It's so much easier.
Right.
And now we're going to veer off of him and talk some more.
And I believe this is the clip where Rogan is really horny about the fucking email.
Transcription by CastingWords
And choose a son.
Ah!
Ftenposten.
Abonner på Sammenhenger.
Gels Because then all of a sudden it's a kook thing.
Now it's a crazy person and a dangerous person because he's got a gun.
You're causing dangerous people to take their guns.
Just like with the vaccines.
They always have to make it dangerous.
It's dangerous to say that this might have side effects.
Because if you read those emails, those emails are bananas.
And they're not explained.
The ending there I love so much.
Because everyone who defends Joe Rogan and tries to claim that he's not some right-wing lunatic, they're always like, no, Joe just wants information.
He just wants to learn.
And he just happens to bring a bunch of right-wing conspiracy theorists onto his show so he can learn from them.
Yet at the end of that clip, Rogan is saying, the emails are bananas, which they're not.
If you've listened to our Pizzagate series, they're incredibly dull.
They're super boring.
They suck.
And if you haven't, you should listen to our Pizzagate series.
Yes.
And subscribe while you're at it.
Patreon.com slash PokerPolitics.
Give them fucking money!
Call to action, motherfuckers!
We're going full Alex Jones on this episode.
We're plugging the Patreon like six times.
It's insane.
We're just terrible, terrible left-wing grifters.
But yeah, Joe Rogan, not neutral, not impartial, not asking Ian Carroll to explain Pizzagate to him.
He's already there going, the emails are bananas!
And Ian...
Yeah, and I think it was Carroll who said that they never explain the emails.
Yes!
And Rogan doesn't even question that.
Oh no, he doesn't.
Oh no, no, no.
Ian jumped in at the end there, never explained.
Which is trying to indicate that the emails are so toxic, so scandalous, that they need to be explained, and no one's dared do it.
No one's dared to try to come up with a rationale for why the emails aren't what we say they are.
Yeah.
It's the old, if so-and-so isn't a pedophile, then how come he's never denied it?
Yeah, Liz Crogan's favorite thing.
Why hasn't Chrissy Teigen and John Legend sued me yet if they're not pedophiles?
And it's like, because they don't want to fucking give you a platform to call them pedophiles?
That's why.
And in all likelihood, they never even heard of a lady.
Yeah, oh yeah, no shit, no shit.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's the thing, is it's just...
Why would I want to Streisand affect a crazy person and make them far more well-known than they should be?
Or worse, you know, something happens where they end up having to settle and then you got the whole thing with Michael Jackson where he settled for one person who claimed abuse and all of a sudden everybody who had ever had a child go to Neverland is like, oh wait, yeah, us too.
He touched him in the swimsuit area.
Give me money.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, God.
I mean, Michael Jackson is the ultimate can of worms and the most ridiculous thing in the world because, boy howdy.
Was this a man who, when he was alive, was 1,000% a pederast?
And now that he's dead, he is Liz Crokin's favorite musical artist.
Everyone's favorite artist.
The guy that was going to blow the whistle on the deep state before they killed him.
Right.
He just, yeah, so silly.
So, so silly.
But yeah.
I know.
I keep thinking about that, like with Negative 48 when he was going on about, you know.
Michael Jackson.
It's like, if Michael Jackson was alive, these guys would be calling him the Jeffrey Epstein of the 20th century.
Yeah, the OG Epstein would be Michael Jackson.
Oh my god, no shit.
Yeah.
It's funny how dying will change your perspective on somebody.
Oh, everyone who dies was working on a documentary about human trafficking in Hollywood.
It's why they killed Gene Hackman.
Don't you worry, they're going to fucking say that soon.
I think someone did say it about Matthew Perry when he died.
Oh, I'm sure they did.
I'm sure they fucking did.
So, here we go now.
We're going to get into the hot dogs, because you knew they were going to.
We're going to get into the hot dogs and the swimming pool, and then Ian's going to try to get us away from documents and facts and evidence that can be looked at.
They're talking about young kids who are going to be coming to a party to have fun.
They'll be in the pool, and they will be there for sure.
$65,000 worth of hot dogs flown from Chicago for a White House party?
The whole thing is, like, very weird.
Did you ever see the archived Instagram post from James Oliphantus' Instagram?
All right.
One thing I want to mention is that they brought up this $65,000 hot dogs thing.
This is something we mentioned in our Pizzagate series.
That was not a Podesta email.
Alex Jones, like, hinted that it was a Podesta email, and now you got boneheads like Joe Rogaine, am I right?
They got him, you know.
But...
But yes, that was from a completely different set of leaked emails on WikiLeaks.
It had nothing at all to do with Podesta.
In fact, it was sent by a card-carrying Republican, not a highly placed member of the DNC. No, this is the Stratton emails, or Stratford emails.
This has nothing to do with the Podesta emails.
And it was right-wing lawyer Fred Burton who worked under Governor Perry in Texas.
During the Perry administration of the state of Texas.
Yeah, the one who wanted to secede during the first Obama term.
And this is the thing, is that Burden is a conservative, and he is making a joke about wasteful liberal spending.
That's the whole bit here.
Fred says in this email, I think Obama spent $65,000 of the taxpayers' money flying in pizza dogs from Chicago for a private party at the White House not long ago.
Assume we are using the same channels.
Go ahead.
No, go ahead.
I'll let you finish.
Which is basically Fred Burton declaring we are also human traffickers.
We are getting our children from the same human trafficking group.
Which would not be something I would say were I a human trafficker.
Yes.
What I was going to say was he also, he kind of mixed up He mixed that – this is what really makes it devious.
That $65,000 hot dog thing, he mixed it in with another email that actually is from the Podesta thing.
That was the grandma email where – Yes.
Yeah, because they mentioned the pool because some little old grandma talking about how the grandkids are coming by and it's going to be a fun time and they're going to play in the pool and they turn it into some sinister – Yeah.
Luciferian ritual.
Yeah, Tamira Palazzo or something.
It's a super Italian name with two Z's in it.
Yeah, this old lady is like, oh, three of my grandkids are going to be coming with us and we're going to have the pool heated so they can go for a swim.
They're going to provide some entertainment.
Which is literally an old person saying, our grandkids are going to be running around and having some fun.
So us oldies can look at the young kids and go, oh gosh, remember when I was a wee lad all those many years ago?
Yeah.
And we mentioned this again in our Pizzagate series, so you should listen to and then subscribe and donate.
No, kidding.
But this email...
Ian and Rogan don't get into this because they don't want to be kooks.
They don't want to actually get into what Pizzagate was because then they would have to start talking like crazy people.
And they want to put a respectable veneer on this bullshit.
Yeah, they're kind of doing the just asking questions thing.
Right, they're doing the just asking questions.
Man, did you see the one about the $65,000 in hot dogs?
And then just moving on right along.
No context, no information.
Right.
But the whole point of Pizzagate, and the reason why it's called Pizzagate and not the Podesta sex trafficking emails, is that...
Allegedly, there was food code being used to hide the crimes that were in these emails, which Joe Rogan calls bananas and then doesn't reference any bananas emails.
So the whole point was that we're using this code that uses food as a cover for children.
Talk about our child trafficking, yet Granny here literally just says, I'm bringing over some kids for you to traffic today!
And the rest of the email chain isn't everyone saying, yo, yo, lady, lady, we use food code.
Calm down, calm down.
No.
She was having a senior moment.
Yeah, she was having a senior moment and forgot to call her grandkids pizzas before saying they were going to be sent over to be exploited.
And then a lot of people were...
We're saying, isn't it suspicious that she says how old the kids are?
And I'm like, have you ever spoken to somebody with kids?
I have one kid, and I'm constantly explaining how old he is.
Yeah, exactly.
And you know who's going to tell you how old they are?
A kid.
Kids love telling you how old they are.
They're so proud of being seven.
You have no idea.
Yes.
You know how old I am?
I'm eight and a half, motherfucker!
A half!
I'm so close to nine, you have no idea!
Yeah, that half is huge.
Yes!
Yeah, I mean, that's the way kids are, so it's very silly.
A lot of this, like, I've been seeing a resurgence of the...
Biden sniffing kids pictures.
It reminded me of this one.
Biden leans into this little girl's ear and he says, I want to tell you a secret.
Don't tell your mother.
The right-wing version will always cut out right after he says that part to leave you wondering what horrifically monstrous thing did Joe Biden say to this girl that was so bad that he had to tell her not to tell her mother about it.
If you watch the full clip, what he actually does is just mumble.
Into her ear.
He's just being a silly old guy.
And it's like, okay, yeah, I mean, in the 21st century, the way he's acting is a little creepy.
I get that.
But you have to be primed and ready to think of this as grooming, to see it as grooming.
Right, that's the thing, is that everything these people do is to prep you to believe that any interaction between an adult and a child is sexual.
It is the universal belief they have about these situations.
Unless it's Donald Trump saying that he's going to be dating a 12-year-old in three years.
Right, right.
Unless Donald Trump's talking about wanting to fuck his daughter, in which case, hey, Ivanka's cute, what can you do?
That's just the way it is.
I mean, yeah.
Our pederast is the president and we love him.
Your pederasts are bad and we hate him.
So yeah, it's just that.
It's just so silly.
So we get...
Oh, the last thing I was going to bring up about that is the $65,000 was actually because they flew a chef to the White House to cook pizza the way Obama wanted it cooked.
And it was a scandal because he got a chef from St. Louis to do it.
St. Louis, the heathen.
Yes, not from Chicago.
He didn't get proper Chicago deep dish.
Even though Obama, who is obviously a Muslim atheist, communist, claimed to be from Chicago and not from the very beating heart of Africa and the Middle East.
So, now we're going to get into Ian starting the gishin' and the gallopin', because that's what he does, and boy howdy, that's probably going to be my lead for the rest of these clips, unless I have something better to say.
No.
Because that's a dark place.
So, there's so many layers to Pizzagate that they tried to cover up intentionally for very good reason.
Well, how about the logos?
Well, the thing is, I avoid, in the way I've talked about it, I've avoided all the symbols and logos and even some of the pizza stuff, because I think there's so much more ripe, clear evidence that is way more powerful.
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Det var akkurat en fyr som ringte og sa at jeg vunnet billetter til Silent Art.
På den ene siden skjønner du sikkert at Thea er megafan.
Er det sant?
Ja!
Jeg har akkurat gitt han passet kortnummeret mitt, og nå skal jeg på femstjern.
På den andre siden...
Men Thea, det kan ikke være skammen da.
Telefonsvindel er dessverre et økende problem.
Derfor inkluderer Telenor svindelvarsel i nye mobilabonnement.
For vi skal være hele Norges sikkerhetsnett.
Se Telenor.no And this is Ian doing work.
This is ignore black insurgents, obviously fake emails.
I got so much better evidence than all that.
What is it?
Ah, we'll get to that later.
Subscribe to my channel and you'll find out.
Right, subscribe to my channel.
Read my newsletter.
Oh, God, all of that.
Yeah, pay for my sub stack.
Yes, yeah, then you'll get the real Pizzagate scoop.
So when you talk about the logos, were they talking about the swirl thing?
Yeah, the pedo swirl.
He was like, ignore the pedo swirl, ignore all...
The thing that was so funny in that statement is he says, I don't even follow some of the pizza stuff, which...
It doesn't make any sense if you actually know what he's talking about, because what he would literally be saying in that is, I don't even believe in the code words, which you couldn't say that and believe in Pizzagate, because if the emails are not encoded, then there's nothing there.
There's nothing that is bananas, according to Joe Rogan.
I love it when there's a guy...
You know, a conspiracy theorist guy who finds one thing that's a bridge too far.
I remember at one point I was following Giorgio Tsoukalos, the hair guy from Ancient Aliens, and he would just go off on flat earthers on Twitter.
He had a raging hate boner for fluffers.
He was always going after them.
And people would be like, look...
Look, the aliens guy thinks your theory is crazy.
What does that tell you?
Yeah, you're making the ancient aliens guy angry because you're making him look bad.
So, Jesus Christ, dude.
And so, basically, Ian is saying that the symbolism and the logos and the code words are all bullshit because Aliphantus' Instagram is so bad and so toxic.
That that's all you need to condemn him with, which...
Social media posts are not evidence of crimes.
If they were, guess what?
They're public.
The cops would show up.
That's how that works.
And, I mean, okay, I didn't realize this until I started looking into it, but James Alphantis is a lot younger than I thought he was.
So, in that context, it's like, oh, it's a bunch of 20-year-old guys making snarky, black humor comments on social media.
What else is new?
Exactly, exactly.
That is, that's what they're doing.
That's, yeah, it's a bunch of edgelords saying dumb edgelord shit, and then you just pivot and go, no, they mean it!
They're saying terrible things, and they're honest about it.
And then, like, a lot of it, it was stuff that, like, kind of sounds a little weird without context, but then, like, it was actually, like, there was an example, oh, it was one, like...
Elephantus was commenting on a picture of his goddaughter and he wrote chicken lover, which sounds, I mean, I wouldn't say that sounds like grooming, but it sounds weird out of context until you dig a little deeper and you find out that what he was actually talking about was that the girl had this stuffed animal chicken that she brought around with her everywhere.
So he was calling her a chicken lover because she loves that stuffed chicken.
Nothing could ever be an inside joke.
Nothing could ever be explained by what actually happened.
That would be way too hard to figure out.
It's like the Umbrella Man in the Kennedy assassination, which was a dude waving around an umbrella while Kennedy was being murdered.
And people were like, what the fuck was that shit?
He had to be in on it.
It was obviously Oswald Cobblepot.
Yeah.
And then they brought him before the House committee on assassinations, and the guy said, I was doing this to mock Kennedy and call him Neville Chamberlain, because Neville Chamberlain had an umbrella.
And then fucking the president gets murdered right in front of me while I'm trying to give him shit.
So, yeah.
Poor for me, basically, was his reaction.
Yeah, that kind of puts everything into context.
Yeah, it's just like, you suck!
Oh my god, he's dead!
Oh no!
Oh no!
Didn't want that to happen!
Just wanted to let him...
I was just trying to give him a piece of my mind, and then they threw his mind onto me!
Yes, I was just trying a little obscure social commentary here.
Right.
I wasn't asking for the man to be killed.
What the fuck?
Yeah.
So...
Ian is just doing this thing where he wants to get away from the source material because he knows that he can just bullshit about things that you're going to have to look around the internet to find.
Maybe you won't find it.
And then that way, he can seem like what he's saying is true.
Because that's the best thing you can do in this situation is never show your source material.
Yeah.
It's why people...
Hide the cue drops from you.
And then when you don't know them, they'll scream, read the drops!
I'm like, where are they?
You're like, shut up!
I'm not going to show you that shit.
Once you see that, you're going to know it's fucking Xenu.
Everyone knows that Xenu's a joke.
And these guys are always saying, do your own research.
And what they actually mean by that is, go on Google until you find something that agrees with my standpoint.
That's a little interesting to you.
That's the dream.
The dream is that you find something that makes you go, hmm, and then you kill yourself.
Because if they didn't even did any actual research, then they'd be like, wait a second, this isn't adding up.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, God.
Yeah, exactly.
Exactly.
So, anyhow, here we go down the road with Ian some more, because that's what's going to be the rest of these clips.
And James Alfonso's Instagram account is a great example.
Can you find it online?
So you cannot find it on Instagram anymore.
It's only been archived onto other sites, which is kind of sketchy because it's like, how do I know you're not adding photos and stuff?
So you kind of have to dig and dig and dig and cross-reference over and over and over to make sure that you're getting sort of like the consensus.
Because everyone watched as it happened.
So people like Liz Kroken, people like Alex Jones, they saw these things come out.
If Liz Crogan and Alex Jones saw it, then holy shit, you know it must be credible.
I'm sure she was happy to get that little Rogan bump right there.
Oh, over the moon.
Oh god, she fucking linked and shouted that out and quote tweeted.
Oh, all of it.
All of it.
Oh man.
Liz getting her two seconds of fame on the Rogan show.
Holy shit.
Yeah.
Listen to what Ian's saying and what he's doing.
He's trying to say, look, man, I had to nail down my facts and my evidence.
I just wasn't willing to accept this at face value because that could be suspicious.
I actually did the hard work of double and triple checking these Instagram accounts and photographs on them.
Yeah, and then he throws in some doubt where if you find something that completely negates what he's saying, oh, well, how do you know that wasn't planted by them?
Right, right, yeah.
And that's the thing, is that if people come up with bullshit, he can now deflect it by saying, oh no, that was fake, that wasn't part of the actual agenda that I'm talking about.
Right.
Which is, something that happens with a lot of the Podesta emails is that QAnon has created their own cache of fake Podesta emails, which all of them are literally...
The person sending the email is like, boy, I can't wait to kill in the name of our false god again.
I love the blood of innocence.
And that's just it.
So much for the code.
Right, exactly.
The code just goes away.
There's one from Hillary where she's just like, she can't stop talking about all the murders she's going to commit.
And then there's another one from Hillary where she's like, Obama, stop murdering children in public!
It's going to look bad for us!
It's just...
It's just so silly that you go from Tony Podesta being like, man, my rigatoni recipe is just, I don't know if I should put some more peppers in it or not.
And then you smash cut to just, Obama, stop exsanguinating the children in the Oval Office.
That's why the deep state let her lose.
2020 because she can't keep a secret to save her life.
Right, right.
Hillary, you got a little Obama, fucking Dracula the kids.
Stop fucking, stop being so, stop being such a Debbie Downer.
Don't do that.
That's bad.
Yeah, what the heck?
And, you know, what happens in the Ninth Circle of Hell stays in the Ninth Circle of Hell.
Right, exactly, exactly, yeah.
So...
Yeah, this is the silliest shit ever.
Anyhow, here's the unlying about some more photos.
And you can find plenty of different archives of all of James Alaphons' Instagram posts.
And there are things like photos of children with their arms taped to tables.
And the caption is, looks like a fun time.
The really important word there is children.
He did not say child.
He said children.
Because that gives you, in your mind, the picture of multiple kids.
Trapped at a table, taped to the table.
Right, or like held down execution style or something.
They're getting ready to prick their neck vein and begin the adrenochrome extraction process.
Something, anything.
This actual photo is of one child, and the child is smiling at the camera as they're looking at it.
I believe it's her goddaughter again.
It's probably his goddaughter, yeah.
And it's masking tape that has her quote-unquote taped down to the table.
Right, she could rip out of it in half a second.
She could rip out of the masking tape immediately if she wanted to.
She is in no way restrained.
This is not duct tape.
This is not an actual restraint.
This is a gag photo.
It's a gag photo.
It's a joke.
That's all it is.
But he...
Ian's not going to tell you that, because if Ian tells you that, it ruins the story.
He wants you to picture kids duct taped down to an operating table or something.
Right.
He wants you to imagine the worst, most terrible thing imaginable, and not a small, smiling child looking at a camera with a lot of masking tape on either side of their arm, but only two little strips of masking tape over their arms.
Tying them to the table.
And you can tell that the girl has range of motion in either arm.
She can move her arms.
She's not trapped.
She could free herself from this quote-unquote prison anytime she wanted to.
Yeah.
And she probably did as soon as the picture was taken.
Yeah, they were probably begging her not to rip her arms free until the mother was done.
It's still longer for me to take this picture.
I've been there.
Yes, yes.
Yeah, that's it.
It's a bit.
They did a bit.
And thankfully for them, the kid played along long enough.
If you've ever watched a YouTube channel where a child or an animal is the main character, the outtake reel is so brutal because the child or the animal will not do what they want them to do.
Did you ever see Banecat?
No, I don't think so.
So basically, they got a cat, and they got the coat and the Bane mask, and it was just a regular house cat, and they would just have it walk in, and then they'd play Bane clips over, and then they would all act like they were terrified of Bane cat, and there were people who were like, you're abusing the cat!
And they were like...
Fuck you!
And they play the outtake reel and it's just so many clips of the cat walking in and they think the cat's going to hit its mark and then it just does it.
It just walks away.
And they're like, no!
No!
We were so close!
We were so close again at that time!
Okay, grab the cat and put him back and try again.
And it's just that.
It's just when you're doing a bit with a small child or an animal, you are just get ready to just kill yourself.
God howdy.
Are you not going to get a cooperative stage partner in your production?
Yeah, even highly trained dogs, they have trouble getting them to hit their marks and stuff.
Oh, like Sir Purr in Game of Thrones, they had like one scene where Tommen and Margaery...
We're in bed, and then Sir Pounce jumps in the bed with him, and they interviewed Natalie Dormer, and she was like, oh my god, that fucking cat.
You have no idea.
You have no idea how many takes we did.
There will be no more scenes involving the cat.
It will not happen.
Yeah.
So, Aliphantus, small child, masking tape, smiley face, the end.
Not exsanguination.
Not a reason to call Child Protective Services.
Incredibly silly.
But Ian's not going to tell you that.
He's not going to show you that.
The last thing on earth they're going to do is show you this photo.
And the only way they would ever show you the photo is if they had literally been talking about this for like two hours.
So that when you look at the photo, you see it the way they want you to see it.
Right.
And not as, oh look, it's a small child and they're playing a joke.
Yeah.
Silly sillies.
Yeah.
Yeah, a couple strips of tape on the dining room table.
Right, yeah, exactly.
And again, I'm absolutely beating this dead horse here, but he fucking said children.
He said children.
And he knows the difference between a child and children.
He knows that plural carries a lot more weight than singular in this situation.
And that's why he said that.
So yeah, so fuck this guy.
He is a grifter.
And now we're just going to expand the grift search here.
This is insane.
And then people that have always been commenting on his posts, like the people that are interacting with his posts all the time, have even weirder Instagrams where it's like kill room.
And there's a coffin that's open and things like that.
There's like a photo of like a walk-in freezer and it's like...
Man, looks like you've been having a fun weekend.
Things like that that are just super dark.
It's super dark.
Yeah, we mentioned the Kill Room post, too.
Stephanie had a good point.
It's a joke I made, too.
You buy a new car and you're like, look, I could probably fit three bodies in this trunk.
Yeah, exactly.
Now, what's funny about this is I found the page where I think he got most of his commentary from.
And that is...
If you look at this page, you can just see that literally all Ian did was scroll down the page and look at photos and do commentary about them.
Which is really...
It goes to show that he's incredibly lazy and he's also desperately avoiding letting you know where he's getting his content from.
Because he doesn't want to make this easy on you.
And the other thing that I want to mention about this is he expands the crime from Aliphantus' Instagram to Aliphantus' friend's Instagram on top of his.
Which, man, now we're just going by guilt by association.
So, Elephantus isn't the problem, it's Elephantus' buddies that are the problem?
I mean, what are we even doing here?
Yeah, but I guess it is a natural progression, since a lot of the comments that they claim are sus, are stuff that Elephantus posted in other people's accounts.
So, like, the guy can't even keep his crimes to his own Instagram.
He's got it infected on everybody.
Yes.
Yeah.
So, we will move swiftly along here from that latest lie from Ian to more lying from Ian about this stuff.
Because that's really what this three and a half minutes is about.
It's just Ian saying bullshit and Joe Rogan just sitting there like a dog staring at his reflection in a puddle.
Just being like, wow.
Yeah.
Because that's what Rogan does.
He'll believe anything somebody tells him as long as they...
Put a veneer of credibility over it.
And as long as they're in his line of sight.
The other thing is that he wants to believe this shit because this is where he's been audience captured.
His audience wants him to say this shit and now he's like, fuck it, I will.
You would think getting like a half a billion dollars from Spotify would make you immune to this shit.
It did the exact opposite.
It made him even more incredulous and even more desperate to be a right-wing conspiracy bro.
It's crazy.
I just don't understand it.
And a bunch of babies and a bunch of symbolism, a bunch of children, and it's all photos on their Instagram in plain daylight.
And they all got scrubbed, obviously.
And that's not to mention Podesta's art collection and the Marina Abramovich connections.
It goes on and on and on and on and on.
The gish gallop at the end there is Chef's Kiss, bringing in Podesta art and Marina Abramovich.
Oh my god.
Like fucking 10 out of 10. No notes, buddy.
No notes.
He didn't bring up spirit cooking, did he?
Yeah, he didn't bring up...
Oh, yeah, the 9.5 out of 10, because you only brought up Marina Brahma.
But a bunch of children and a bunch of symbolism.
Again, this page I'm on, it's so full of baby photos.
And then you have a photo of Marina Abramovich on it, and you have a photo of, like, one of the Podest...
The Ark of whatever, the Ark of Delirium, that sculpture of the person arching their back.
You have...
So basically, on the page, you have that photo and the Ark of Delirium, and then it says, like, Tony and Heather Podesta's house.
And then Alifana says, yeah, Vanessa, come see it.
Avani is right on.
They have such a beautiful collection.
One of these days I'll get an invite.
And on and on.
And then there's a photo of a topless lady who's an adult.
And then there's a photo of construction, photo of a child that shot some rabbits.
More sexy photos.
And then a photo of Marina Abramovich holding some sticks.
Which is like...
Scandalous.
Yeah, scandalous.
And it's just, all this stuff is just, you're just scrolling.
All you're doing is just scrolling through this page and then saying, oh, look at this.
Oh, here's a kid.
Oh, look, Marina Abramovich.
Oh, Jesus.
And what's really funny is there's a photo in here that is just literal pornography.
Like, just straight-up penetration PNV porn.
And they don't even bring it up, which is, like, really weird to me.
You would think that if you were doing this, like, massive, like, oh, this terrible stuff that's going on here, like, the actual sex photo might have gotten you upset.
But nope, we're just gonna ignore it.
This stuff that's on Elephantus is...
Yeah, this is stuff that's on Aliphantus' and Aliphantus' friends' Instagrams.
Okay, yeah, because you think someone might point out, why does he have these heterosexual intercourse photos when he's gay?
That seems sus.
Yeah, the point of this photo is that you have an art exhibit.
Like, display guy.
Like, someone who's, like, the attendant in the room might want to explain the art to people or whatever.
And that guy is just head against the wall, like, taking a nap.
Couldn't be more fucking, like, couldn't be bothered with this bullshit.
And right next to him is just, like, this pornographic photo.
And it's, like, the dichotomy of that.
Like, that's the point of this photo.
It's just, like, normally you'd think that, like, dude would be, like, just cranking it, looking at porn.
And this guy is just like, oh, man, 90 more minutes before my shift is over.
Oh, God.
90 minutes away from not having to look at this dick anymore.
Oh, God.
And, yeah.
And yeah, that's literally one of the comments from Elephant's friends.
It says, love that he is now so bored with it.
Like, probably when you first walked into the room and saw that film, you were like, holy shit!
And now, like, eight hours into your shift, you're just like, snooze, don't care.
Absolutely the most fucking...
You can be desensitized to anything if you fucking work at it long enough.
And boy, howdy.
Has he been so?
And it's just...
Like, that kind of thing.
And there's a photo of Obama playing ping-pong of a kid!
Oh my god!
Why didn't he even have a stroke over that?
Yeah, and I have seen people comment on that photo because they claim it's him playing at comic ping-pong.
Yeah.
But then, like, the site I saw, they showed other pictures showing that it was clearly in a corridor in the White House that he was playing this ping-pong game.
Yeah, I mean, that's the thing.
It's so obvious.
I mean, my God.
Comet Ping Pong is obviously not this.
Yeah.
Because...
Yeah, I've never been there, but I know they don't have marble floors and red carpets.
Yeah, they don't have marble floors, red carpets, or giant white walls.
Right.
And they don't have, like, a white shirt tied security.
Like, it's very obvious.
This is like some area of the White House that Obama's playing ping pong with a kid in.
And yeah, it's just very silly.
Just all of it.
They're just jealous that Obama can play ping pong, whereas Trump would have a coronary if he even tried to pick up a paddle.
Oh yeah, no kidding, no kidding.
I mean, it's just very silly.
There's so much here that could be talked about, but Ian just goes with the shit.
Ian's just playing the hits for his audience.
Yeah, because every picture he mentioned, I could see it in my head because I saw it in our research for Pizzagates.
Right.
Ian's not trying to reinvent the wheel here.
Ian's not going down any paths that haven't already been well-trodden before.
We're just going to bring up Abramovich.
We're going to bring up Podesta Art.
We're playing the hits, baby!
Freebird!
Yeah, he knows what works and he's going to run with it.
Right.
He's going to say the things that are going to give the audience that came to listen to his episode on Rogue and get their dopamine hit.
He doesn't want them to actually start looking at Podesta's fucking stuff or Aliphantus' stuff because that might make them do research and look at stuff and then they might accidentally...
Stumble across a mainstream article debunking Pizzagate, and that would hurt their little brains, so we can't be doing that.
Yeah, they just want to have their confirmation bias, basically.
Oh, God, yes.
Oh, love it.
God, do they want their confirmation bias.
And now, I was going to cut this one up, but then it just ran and ran and ran, and I just gave up.
So this is almost a minute of, this is the finale.
This is the big payoff.
This is just Ian lying his ass off for like 50 seconds.
So like, just, I don't know, take a long drink and just get yourself nice and blind drunk by the end of this.
Yeah.
And we're talking about the Clintons with the Haiti scandals, with the cocaine in Arkansas.
It's like, the thing is that we sound crazy.
I sound crazy to someone that doesn't.
Because you just start, there's so many layers of like crazy shit that's happened with some of these people that if you don't know the history of a person like Bill Clinton and Hillary Clinton, it's really easy to think, oh, that's just so insane that you would think that they'd be involved in it.
And first of all, they frame it in the articles about Pizzagate.
They say...
Hillary Clinton was the mastermind of a global pedophile sex trafficking ring all headquartered in this pizza shop, which is not what anyone ever claimed.
Right, so as soon as you can discredit that, you discredit the whole thing.
Classic frame job, which Nancy Pelosi explains very well, where you make a false claim and you say that's what they're saying and then you discredit the false claim.
I like how he doesn't even know the term strawman argument as he's describing one.
Yeah, I love that.
It's like, Nancy Pelosi invented the straw man argument.
And it's like, really?
I know she's old, but I didn't think she was that fucking old.
Nancy Pelosi invented three of the seven fallacies.
What?
The ad hominem was invented by Nancy Pelosi?
What the fuck?
What the fuck are you talking about?
I noticed he used one of David Icke's favorite tactics where in the middle of talking about all the crazy shit he goes, I know this sounds crazy.
Because that way, it's like hanging a lampshade on it.
You admit that it's crazy, so the guy's like, okay, well, you know, he knows this sounds nuts to a layperson, so I'll give him a pass.
Exactly.
And the best part about that is that the Clinton, the OG Clinton bullshit is so fucking old that you have to be me banging my clog on the table in my dotage, in my elderly age.
Listening to Clinton body count shit nowadays and being like, we're really doing Minda Airport?
We're really doing the fucking cocaine airport?
I mean, because Haiti is still QAnon.
That's a little fresh.
But the Clinton cocaine smuggling, that's from the fucking 90s.
I mean, that shit was like fucking when I was in high school for crying out loud.
Yeah.
I want to see something.
Oh, okay.
Ian Carroll's way older than I thought he is, so never mind.
Oh, wait, no.
This is a different Ian Carroll.
You've been betrayed.
I'm looking at 1946 and I'm like, wait, that would make him Biden's age.
Yeah, that would be great.
And the guy's dead, too.
That's hilarious.
Yeah, Ian Carroll.
Yeah, Ian Carroll you looked at was the guy who popped up for me also.
Yeah.
That's really funny.
That's really funny.
Yeah, get a less common name, jerk.
Yeah, or do the fucking the three-name thing.
Yeah, do the three-name thing.
Bust out your middle name.
That's right, yeah, like any decent shooter.
Yes.
I think that was Mel Gibson and Conspiracy Theory who made me first notice that shooters always have three names.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Oh, that was like, yeah, fucking Bill Simmons did that with Bernard Pollard, the Kansas City chief guy that dove into Brady's knee and took him out for a season.
He would always use his middle name to make him like Lee Harvey Oswald.
Or John Wilkes Booth.
Yep.
Yeah, take that, Cholgosh and Gutierrez.
You didn't get the three names.
Garfield and McKinley were too weak for you to get the fucking big payoff and get your middle names used.
Yeah.
And now I'm trying to remember the name of the guy who killed Archduke Ferdinand.
I don't think he had a middle name, but he's also not American.
Right, exactly.
Oh, man.
Poor Leon Cholgosh.
He only gets Leon F. Cholgosh in the...
In the wiki.
Maybe he's one of those people who didn't actually have a middle name.
Yep, he didn't.
The F didn't stand for anything.
Leon F. Cholgosh.
Oh, and actually, I was thinking about this since I mentioned Ferdinand.
That whole thing had a kind of a comedy of errors thing like the Kennedy assassination where the guy who actually assassinated Ferdinand, it was a complete fluke.
Yes!
Yeah, they threw a bomb at Ferdinand, and it didn't go off, or he botted it away, and then literally he only got him because they stopped and parked somewhere, and he happened to be in the cafe.
Yeah, they were, like, driving back, and he just happened to be on the path that they took to drive home, basically.
Yeah, absolutely fucking wrong place, wrong time.
Yeah.
Charles Julius Coutier.
Oh, man.
That's the thing, if you actually read up on these, like, famous assassinations and stuff, you kind of stop believing in conspiracy theories, because you just see, like, I mean, just how many insane coincidences occur in these things?
Right, yeah, it's just, it's so, it ends up being so slapdash and random, you're just like, what the fuck?
Yeah, like, how can anybody possibly have placed that guy in a location where nobody knew the Archduke would be?
Right.
You just learn that reality is nothing but a bunch of serendipity, and it's just that.
Yeah, and I think that's one thing that turns somebody into a conspiracy theorist, because they don't want to believe that stuff just happens because God rolled the dice the wrong way.
Right, right.
I mean, that was when we were talking that one day, and you were like, so Matt Pinfield's why we got garbage.
And I'm like, yes!
And literally found you the post from Shirley saying that.
Just total serendipity.
She's a fucking waitress at a Scottish bed and breakfast for her life.
But no, this one guy plays a music video from her band one time, and then she gets recruited by a bunch of music producers, and her life is not what it is.
She high-rolls the shit out of it.
It's just that.
It's just so much.
Her story and the story of Maisie Williams, who played Arya Stark, are my two favorite ridiculous high-rolls.
Just the most insane series of dumb breaks that just leads to you becoming famous out of nowhere.
No one is the product of just self-determination and you making it.
It just never happens that way.
You're going to get a break at some point from somewhere.
Even if you couldn't see it, it still happened.
that got you to where you are or something went against you.
And that's why things didn't work out better for you.
Right.
And you just have to roll with those punches.
And when something good breaks your way, you have to maximize it.
When something bad happens to you, you have to work to minimize it.
But yeah, like, uh, Like, the guy that Stephen King sent his first draft of Carrie to, if that guy had a fight with his wife that morning, his whole career might never have happened.
Yeah, exactly.
Exactly.
I mean, it's just that kind of stuff.
Like, you just never know.
Like, a fucking Twilight author girl got rejected by 25 different people, and the 26th one was like, ah, chick-stick vampires, let's take a shot on this.
I mean, like...
Yeah, I mean, you just never know.
You just never know how things are going to break, and it's just that.
And by the same token, we're talking about all this kind of stuff, and it's just fucking when they planned out JFK's parade route, they didn't know they were going to get him fucking murdered.
Like, why did Kennedy die?
Bad break.
And no one wants to hear that.
They want to know that the Illuminati did it.
I mean, that makes it so much better.
Yeah, I keep coming back to that one thing where if the guy who was managing the school book depository, if he had decided that Oswald was going to be the guy going to the second location, it didn't happen.
Right.
Literally, the whole world changes.
He was like, hey, Steve, you stay here.
Lee, go three blocks down.
Work the other place.
Oswald couldn't fight that.
He was a fucking idiot who needed a job.
Okay.
Shuffles his ass three blocks down.
And he would have had absolutely no reason to fight it.
Right.
This is what I knew at the time that he was going to be going past that building.
Yep.
Yeah, and then you listen to Rob Reiner and he fucking does the guiding hands bullshit where Ruth Payne got him the job to frame him for the president's murder.
It's like, oh my god.
Fuck you.
Fuck you, meathead.
Oh, man.
You know who's enjoying all of this?
Ian Carroll, because we've completely ignored him.
Ian's just escaped the pod.
Ian's just tiptoeing out the door, being like, ah, these guys are talking about JFK and Shirley Manson and living their best lives.
I'll just sneak away.
No, you won't, Ian.
No, you won't.
You ain't getting away from me, you fuck.
This is all he's doing, is taking a bunch of serendipity and a bunch of old, tiny bullshit about the Clintons, which never had any evidence back then.
He didn't even say men to airport, because again, he just wants to say, oh yeah, the Clintons and the cocaine.
How are you going to Google search that?
Bill Clinton cocaine?
What is going to come up when you do that?
That's the goal.
Ian Carroll and all these assholes dreams is to say stuff that you can't Google.
Right.
Because if you can't source it, then they can say whatever the fuck they want, and they can get away with it.
I'm always trying to remember the name, but there's this YouTube channel that I watched like a thousand years ago, and the guy, it was like what you were talking about with Haley with that one.
I think it was a Mark Fincham commercial or something like that where he just bombards you with images and phrases and it's all going way too fast for your brain to process and he's just hoping that something will go ping in your brain and that starts the avalanche.
Right.
Yeah, that's the goal.
The goal is to just...
Total spray and pray.
Right.
It is this thing that these people do.
Where the goal is to hit you with as much bullshit as possible and try to find one or two things you might agree with to lead you down the road.
And that's literally the red-pilling guides.
These people who post stuff on 4chan and beer on the parade is my favorite asshole because he's always promoting red-pilling guides.
They're always talking about it.
You just like start and start and you find something that someone might have trouble with.
Like they're not sure about climate change or they're not sure about this or that or the other thing.
And then you just plant that seed with them and you try to break them on that issue.
And if you can break them on that issue, then you can break them on a lot more and you can turn them into a nut.
And that's what these people do.
They're actively working to manipulate you while pretending to be your friend.
And that's what Ian Carroll's doing.
He's pretending to be an investigative journalist and a reporter when he's really just a grifter and a scoundrel.
Right.
I love that phrase, citizen journalist.
Citizen journalist.
Most meaningless term in the fucking history of the world.
I'm like, what are MSN journalists then?
Are they in the military and nobody told me?
Are they priests?
I don't understand.
And I don't think I mentioned this.
I didn't.
And so this would be a great way to cap this pod off, was that Ian, when he was doing that whole Tim Walls as a pederast thing, he even said that during the...
While he was making these allegations, he's like, look, man, if this all amounts to nothing and I'm wrong, well, I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience.
It's like, oh, really?
You're going to slander a sitting governor and maybe the next vice president of the United States.
You're going to call him a pederast.
And if it turns out there's no evidence to support that, your reaction is going to be, aw, shucks, my bad.
I'll do better next time, guys.
That's why pencils have erasers.
Right, exactly.
And it's like, no, no.
If you fucking take a swing this wild and you miss, you need to fucking own that shit.
You just can't be like, oh, rub some dirt on it.
Golly gosh.
Zoinks.
Zoinks, Scoob.
Oh, well, better luck next time.
Won't call people pederists without better information next time.
It's like, yeah.
Everybody gets one.
Yeah, everyone gets one free call-a-public-figure-a-pedophile in the hopes of tilting an election against them.
Yes, while he's running for vice president of the United States.
Right, exactly.
This is, yes.
Just, you know, so anyhow.
So that's it.
That's the clips.
That's Ian Carroll lying his ass off about Pizzagate.
I want you, the listener, to listen to how Ian was doing that to understand how a professional bullshitter bullshits because that's what this is all about.
And also, for anyone defending Joe Rogan, notice the zero pushback.
Notice the breathless yes ending of it all and playing along with it.
Rogan's not some doe-eyed knave.
He's in on it.
And I've watched clips of him.
You know, when he's doing the interviews, and he, and, like, it'll always be like something, they'll say something, and he'll have this just, his jaw drops, like, uh-huh.
Like, I can't believe what I just heard.
Wow.
Really?
Wow.
They did that?
Oh, that's what pizza means?
Oh, man.
Yeah.
Yeah, just fuck you.
God damn it.
Yeah, both of you.
You're both scum.
I, way years ago, I listened to his show a little bit, like, when he would have...
Like, say, Neil deGrasse Tyson.
I'm literally going to say that.
Neil deGrasse Tyson.
Like, back in those days when, like, he wasn't just all nut all the time.
Right.
You know, he'd have, like, Bob Stanhope on and they'd spend an hour and a half talking about how to do a comedy routine.
You know, stuff like that.
Right, right, right.
Yeah, exactly.
I mean, that's the thing.
I'm sorry, Stephanie.
I know you're a fan of his.
Hey.
I'm just picturing her carving up an effigy of me.
Yeah, I mean, hey, there's exactly one episode of the Joe Rogan Experience I've listened to all the way through, and I'll give you three guesses on who the guest was, and you won't need the second or the third one.
So, I mean, it's...
It was Shirley MacLaine.
No, wrong!
So close.
Oh, man.
We have lovely parting gifts for you.
Oh, man.
I called Tim Walz a pedophile and I got Shirley's last name wrong.
Those are about equal.
Those are about equal mistakes.
Oh, dogs.
Oh, gosh, and Begora.
Oh, man.
Fiddlesticks.
Yes, Fiddlesticks is another one.
Oh, goodness gracious, gee willikers.
I've always loved gee willikers.
That was...
Oh, no, no, no, no.
I always get that wrong.
It was what John Wooden, the UCLA basketball coach, would say.
It was, goodness gracious, saints alive.
And that was...
That was basically, like, literally, like, Bill Walton, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, like, literally everyone who was under him was like, when he said that, you had fucked up so bad that you were like, oh, no, he's actually going to kill me.
Because he didn't curse, he didn't say anything.
So when he said, goodness gracious, sakes alive, or sakes alive, you were like, oh, no, oh, no, he's about to come over here and tear me a new asshole.
And it was like the one time I heard my Irish grandmother say, my Irish Catholic grandmother say, damn.
I was like, oh, God.
Yes.
I've made a terrible mistake.
Thankfully, it wasn't me she was angry at.
Yeah.
I was still like, uh-oh, I better write my P's and Q's.
Yeah, it was just a record skip moment.
You're like, whoa!
She said that?
Oh, man.
Someone's done something real bad.
So, anyhow, thank you all for listening to this.
Hopefully, me and Hayley are going to do a thing about the trip that she took.
Yeah, I want to hear about that.
Yep, and all the fun and festivities that happened there.
That's right, I took my own show, dammit.
Yes.
So thank you all for listening.
Give us a five-star review wherever you listen to us.
If you want to give us money, go to patreon.com slash pokerpolitics.
Do that.
Give me money.
If you don't want to give me money, go to love146.org and donate to people that are fighting child trafficking because that's a really good thing that QAnon lies about caring about.
They don't care about anything but Trump.
They just love their orange god.
Even though he's destroying the stock market and America, and they're about to die breaking the siege of Montreal so we can finally have our 51st state via blood and conquest.
The no-war president.
Yeah, the peace president who is going to take Canada by the sword.
Thanks to DJ Minimal Effort for our theme that I've accidentally remixed.
Thanks to Frosty for all the bumps you heard at the start.
Even the fair use bump I got to break out of mothballs.
Thanks to everybody else for listening to all of us.
I don't know how this ends.
Even though I've been doing it for three months, I still am bad at it.
So have a good night, everybody.
Good speed, patriots.
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