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Nov. 14, 2024 - Adventures in HellwQrld
01:22:06
Adventures in HellwQrld Episode #214: Elon and Trump are BFF's, or are they?!

This week we get into BlueAnon Election theft, Kari Lake stolen election theories, Ron Watkins trying to get a job working for Trump and all sorts of other dumb dumbness. Get bonus content on PatreonSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/hellwqrld. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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The Adventures in Hellworld podcast talks in-depth about QAnon.
While it's meant to be comedic informative, sometimes we have to get into things like child abuse and violence against people.
Listener discretion advised.
Hello everybody, I'm Mike Rains, a.k.a.
Poker and Politics, and welcome to another episode of Adventures in Hellworld.
This week I am joined as always by Haley, a.k.a.
Arizona Rightwatch.
Um, hello listeners.
It is I, the leftist Joe Rogan.
We did it.
We found the leftist Joe Rogan.
Alternate media is saved.
I'm also joined by the mysterious L. Hello, beautiful babies.
It's me, right-wing Joe Rogan.
Oh my god, it's normal Joe Rogan.
Hey, I listened to some AI translation of Hitler speeches, and man, you know, that guy...
Not a point about a few things.
No way.
That sounds like regular Joe Rogan talk to me.
For right when Joe Rogan would just be like, and for my next guest, literal Hitler!
We cloned Hitler!
He's in the studio!
That's what being king of podcast money gets you cloned Hitler.
And then we realized that it was just a DMT experience inside of Joe Rogan's mind.
And he was like, wow, that would be a really fun show, but we just don't have the technology.
Do we?
No, we don't.
Or?
No.
What?
Did we all see Theo Vaughn on Joe Rogan being like, the Jews own the media and they hate white people?
And Joe Rogan's eyes got bigger than his head?
And he's like, did you really just say that?
Well, that was Theo Vaughn's character, Theo Vaughn.
Oh!
He's like Stephen Colbert.
Oh, yeah.
Theo Vaughn's got more layers than an onion.
Such a complex character.
Oh, man.
I mean, I guess it's just because his audience is all just liberal folk anyway, but I love how Stephen Colbert did it.
He literally built his whole image just being himself and wearing a himself suit and then transitioned to late night by just unzipping the suit and crawling out of himself and just being like, that was a lie.
This is who I really am.
And everyone was just like, we knew.
That's cool.
I was just like, wow, that's a very bizarre pivot.
You don't see a lot of people doing that.
Right.
I was literally a character this whole time, and now I'm not that character anymore.
And the character's fairly well oppositionally related to his real political leanings and general moral beliefs.
He was just sort of playing the reverse side of his own coin, but everybody was like, that's fine.
Did you see Sacha Baron Cohen busted out Borat a couple of weeks ago on one of those talk shows?
He just, like, showed up and did a little Borat.
It did not hit the same.
No, it doesn't.
It really doesn't, because then he starts to do, like, anti-Palestinian commentary with the Borat, and it's like, bro, it's not the time.
It's not the time.
He's calling attention to it, though, you know?
What's happening?
I actually do really like him as a character actor, but I was just like, I didn't think that Borat was going to hit again when the second movie came out, and it was surprisingly good because somehow he tricked enough people again.
Because wisely, they just got an actor on board to do a new Borat.
A young girl Borat.
And he was, like, largely able to hide because of it.
And that was cool.
And a smart filmmaking decision.
And good for them for that movie.
But yeah, then he's just like, I'm going to put on the mustache and do a little Borat ahead of my interview with Fallon tonight.
And it's like, no, don't do that.
Like, Borat is a...
Like, put on some chains and bust out Olly G. That would be funnier.
I haven't seen Olly G in a while.
I want to hear his take on, like, the current UK crime scene.
Like, what does he think about Stormzy?
You know?
Like, the people need to know.
Just lost all of our audience.
They don't know what the fuck I'm talking about anymore.
All of these references are from like 25 years ago now.
I'm going to drop another old reference, even though I talk about him often.
I saw Rob Schneider get interviewed on the Adam Friedland show, and it was so fucking funny because...
Wow, was this before or after you watched the Theo Vaughn on Joe Rogan experience?
Yeah.
I mean, yikes.
That sucks.
I'm getting paid for this.
I mean, we're like, holy shit.
Patrick bet David interview Chris Cuomo and Charlie Kirk this week, so my media diet has been wild.
Dude, I watched Agatha all along this past week, you know?
That's what I've been loving.
I played that new Dragon Age video game, you know?
I don't know.
Is it woke?
The new Dragon Age?
I haven't experienced any of the woke parts.
Well, no, I did, but I intentionally avoided it because I just didn't care about...
There's one...
So when you have dialogue options, they usually give you these little indicators to give you a vibe.
It's just like, this is going to be the tough, aggressive option.
This is going to be the stoic, stand-your-ground option.
The one that obviously was going to lead you down a conversation about gender politics was the only one of those that's in the game that I've seen so far that had an arcane flourish to it.
It was the brightest fucking warning.
It was literally sparks exploding from it.
It was just like, dude, if you pick this, it will talk about gender.
The pronouns are involved.
Like, watch out!
And I was just like, that's hilarious.
They made that fucking thing white hot.
You literally could not miss it.
It was just like, love it or hate it, this is the one.
This is the one you need to do not fuck with this if you don't want a part of that.
And I avoided it just because I'm not really interested in the writing in the game because all of the writing in the game that I've heard that hasn't been from the main antagonist has been boring.
Very boring.
So...
I need to be very clear because I ended my commentary on Rob Schneider that I found his interview with Adam Friedland funny.
And I don't want people to misunderstand that I found Rob Schneider funny.
Actually the opposite.
He's not funny at all.
But in the interview, he really sniffs his own farts and just thinks he's like God's gift to mankind.
Literally the greatest comic of mankind.
Just like really thinking like he's going over like really like you can do it as if like he workshopped that thing for years and it's it's just it was just a incredibly funny like he thinks he is Gene Wilder of our era and it's just not you're Rob Schneider.
Well, also the Gene Wilder, I think, is the Gene Wilder of our era, right?
All the people I know that are my age love Gene Wilder.
I feel like Gene Wilder's...
And secondly, like, who the fuck remembers that you can do it?
Like, that's like a reference for, like, a very certain, like, band, like, age band.
Like, eight years, plus or minus.
Like, I mean, do you really think that, like, any of these skibbity-toilet kids are also just, like, skibbity-toilet in an edition?
You can do it, you know?
Like that guy from that movie we watched.
He's threatening to run for governor here.
He put out a threat.
Good.
I hope he wins.
Yeah!
I hope at this point every state just goes as bad place as cartoonishly fast as possible.
That'd be so funny.
We're already on that trajectory.
Why not?
Do all the liberal states get to do that too?
Can it literally just be like, what do you think, Mayor Taylor Swift?
Taylor Swift, mayor of Los Angeles or whatever.
That'd be incredible.
I mean, I know it's kind of like a spoiler alert, but the Fox News guy that they picked for defense secretary is kind of in that vein of just like, wow, we picked the stupidest guy.
Was that thirst trap of him at the 9-11 Ground Zero monument?
Is that real?
Is that a real thing?
No, I've never seen that.
I mean, I saw it on Twitter right before we recorded it.
Like, it was...
They were purporting that it was him, and he was, like, sort of just, like, shirtless in some, like, boxers with, like, an American flag, like, laying flowers on that monument.
And, like, could it have been AI? Sure.
But, I mean, like, at first blush, it was convincing enough where I was just like, is this a real thing?
Eh, whatever.
I scrolled past it.
I didn't linger on it for too long, but...
Because exit the Everything app, if you linger on something for too long, it will really fucking punch you.
Wait, why is he in his underwear at the 9-11 thing?
What's going on here?
I don't know.
Did you find it?
I did.
It looks like he was doing the Navy SEAL Hudson River swim and took a photo in his teeny tiny little swimsuit holding an American flag at the 9-11 memorial.
There we go.
Never forget.
Never forget, his dick is right up against Gary Edward something's last name.
I don't want to disrespect the full man's name, but his dick's right up against that guy's name.
That's the third tower.
And Soviet Russia tower crashes into you.
Okay, you know, this took a dark turn.
Or it didn't.
I mean, I don't have any particular respect or disrespect for the victims of 9-11, you know?
I'm on paper having made jokes about that like any other tragedy.
I make jokes about Pearl Harbor, too.
Get on my back!
It's like universally acceptable to make 9-11 jokes at this point.
Have you seen that Indian concrete ad?
Incredible.
I may have even talked about it on the podcast before, but it is the funniest thing I've ever seen in my life.
That's a funny TikTok.
If you ever want to hoot or holler, you can just search Indian concrete ad.
Indian concrete, yep.
Maybe 9-11 if you want to get real specific.
Yeah, it's real.
The extra specificity for the 9-11 make it pop.
I mean, the problem is that they insisted that we never forget, so we have to keep it fresh in our minds at all times.
So inevitably, some of that is going to turn comedic, you know?
They tried romance.
They tried mixing romance into it, and it seemed way more distasteful.
You guys remember that movie, Remember Me?
And it's a legendary twist ending.
Maybe the greatest twist ending in cinema.
No.
Oh my god, Haley, have you seriously never heard of this?
No.
So Remember Me is a Robert Pattinson romantic drama movie about these two people having trouble but eventually finding each other, what have you, whatever.
But the whole movie is just sort of ambiguous.
There's nothing to really place it date or time-wise.
And then, like, the movie ends with Robert Pattinson, like, on the phone, essentially, just being like, love you, babe.
Things are gonna work out just fine.
The 9-11 happened?
And then the camera pulls out of the window, and you see that his office is in one of the World Trade Center buildings, and, like, the plane is on approach, and then it cuts to credits.
I'm not gonna lie, I'm gonna watch this movie, because that sounds hilarious.
Like, what a twist!
And I think that movie, I forget when it came out, it came out, like, it was just like, yo, it does not feel like it's been long enough for you to do that.
It was like...
It was 2011 or something.
It was still pretty recent.
It was just like, holy shit.
Yeah, legendary.
I mean, sorry to ruin that for people.
But yeah, I mean, if you want to see like a real movie that they thought was like a real thing that they should and did too.
I feel like if you like kind of like quickly summarize the entire movie in a one minute TikTok and it ended in that way, it would come off pure comedy.
This sounds like a comedy.
Yeah, absolutely.
I mean, the guy from I Think You Should Leave could do this.
He could be screaming in an office building when a 9-11 happens.
Yeah, just like an insane thing.
Anyway, speaking of insane things, let's move on and start to discuss Amuse-Bouche.
It's time for a light sampling of insanity.
Get ready for the Amuse-Bouche.
I bet there's probably going to be a lot more of this on the rise, I do have to say, coming up.
So let's kick off.
It's Blue Anon season.
That's right.
The Blue Anon.
They're back.
Blue Anon is the new QAnon, baby, because now they're the scrappy underdogs.
So, Mike, what are these scrappy underdogs up to now, besides being scrappy?
Is Kamala Harris going to overturn the election?
That is possible if you donate $25 to the text that just sent to you for the Kamala Recount Fight Fund or whatever bullshit grift is being announced by people.
There are fake social media posts.
Dude, you don't want the government tracing that money.
Everybody should send their money to me first and then I will send it to her.
And that way, if the sword has to fall on somebody, it's just heroically me.
Yes.
Give all your money.
Yes.
Send Elle all the money you're going to send to the Kamala Recount Fund.
That's a much better use of it.
There are fake social media posts claiming that Harris is stating that we're going to win on a recount.
She did not do this.
There is no effort to overturn the election in any way, shape, or form.
It's done.
We fucking lost.
Have these people not been seeing the Donald Trump victory lap handshake with Biden photos coming out of the Oval Office today?
It's done and dusted, man.
The actual person who's in the White House is just like, guess who the next president is?
This guy.
The guy who's handshaking in his soon-to-be new office.
Yeah.
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, but this is, these people are living in this reality denial field, much like QAnon did back in 2020.
And we have that shit going on, but the main story that's been going on is we've got our new Italian spy satellite, and it's Starlink.
It's Elon's Starlink.
Starlink is flipping the votes.
Starlink stole the election.
Elon stole the election.
He flipped the switch.
He beeped the boop.
He did the thing needed to make Trump win, even though Trump totally lost for really reals, honest, I swears.
Yeah.
The algorithms.
The algorithms.
It altered the algorithms.
Send me 50 bucks.
I'll prove it to you.
I'll prove it to America.
I'll get Kamala Harris into office.
I can save you.
Please give me money.
That's what these people are doing.
It is a scam.
This is the exact same shit that I heard in 2004 when everyone told me that Diebold stole the election from Kerry and gave it to W., And this is one of the things that I don't know if it was Mike Rothschild, but someone mentioned this about QAnon, is that QAnon was a very weird conspiracy theory, because conspiracy theories are for losers.
They're for people that lost something, like, say, an election.
And the fact that QAnon started in 2017, a year after Trump won, it just really goes to show how, like, Trump had lost a lot of juice in In the internet and in the magosphere, because he'd been governing as a kind of just boring Republican president for a year, and he wasn't doing all the shit he said he was going to do.
He was mostly just fucking off and golfing.
And then suddenly this conspiracy theory was created around him being this five-year-old...
Right, exactly.
Yeah, yeah.
You think that's golf he's playing?
You idiot cucks.
And it's just like, oh, whoa.
And so that was what was so strange about QAnon was that they were the winners and they still needed a conspiracy theory to win more in order to try to make themselves feel even better about their president.
And now because he's won again and they're mostly content about it, although we're going to talk about some whining in a little bit.
Now the losing side has to have conspiracy theories to explain how they lost.
And there's no evidence for any of this shit.
So if you see this stuff and you're upset about Trump winning, you have to pull yourself back to reality.
You have to accept that this is how this works.
That burger expensive.
That the American people were very mad that their burrito taxis cost five bucks too much and therefore...
What'd you say?
Eggs.
Oh, yeah.
I don't think I bitched this.
I talked to the one conservative person who's sort of in my orbit that I can't really avoid.
But thankfully, they're one of those anti-Trump conservative people.
So this time around, I think they literally just threw their vote away, like voting for some random whatever cares.
But I was also just, I was like, hey, man.
On the podcast I do, we had a little thought experiment, and I asked how many people you might think, percentage-wise, in the country would just sell out their vote for $100.
And he was just like, oh, at least half.
He just said it immediately.
He just said it right away.
He was just like, oh, at least half, probably.
And I was just like, cool.
I was like, I said about a third, like 33%.
He was just like, yeah, I could see that, but I think it might be higher than that.
Okay, well, that's interesting.
And I'm glad that we agree on that.
I mean, that's fucked up.
You know, like, isn't that fucked up?
But alright, cool.
As far as Blue Anon stuff, I actually, also someone kind of in my personal life, who is a liberal, was baking a quote that Trump had said kind of towards the end of his...
Like, the election cycle, where he was just kind of being braggadocious and being like, we don't even need votes, you know?
We got all the votes we need.
Like, we don't even need you to vote for us.
Like, he said it at a rally, which...
It's just mumbly Trump kind of just being...
It sounds...
It reads to me like he's being his typical braggadocious self.
But this person in my life was baking it as proof that they're kind of dropping basically just these breadcrumbs.
It's literally just QAnon kind of shit.
But...
Yeah, I mean, and the response is similar to the QAnon response, which is just like, evidence, please.
Yeah, literally, because it's like- Evidence, little man, put that shit in my hand.
If that evidence don't show, then you owe me, owe me, owe.
I will give them the kind of Blue Anon kind of stuff, at least, that unlike the Republicans, it's not permeating into reaching...
Kamala Harris isn't repeating that Elon flipped the algorithms with Starlink.
But as far as that, like, baking of the quote from Trump, I did see, like, even Maddow and, like, I think Joy Reid kind of being like, what did he mean by that?
Like, don't start this.
Don't do this.
Don't feed these conspiracies.
Dude, do not let them see you cry.
Come on.
Come on, liberals.
Like, come on, everybody.
Like, you know, don't let them see you cry.
Don't throw a big hissy fit so that way they can just be like, ah, look at those.
Don't score easy points on you.
Literally.
It's just like, don't do this, man.
Don't once again let them score easy points on you, not unlike the presidential election that just happened, where balls were dropped across the board.
All balls.
And there's still finger-pointing to do, and there's going to be finger-pointing forever.
But enough of that.
Let's talk about the deep state, baby.
Because the deep state is striking back.
Mike, how is the deep state striking back?
And also, how do you strike back if you're always in control?
Isn't that just striking?
It's very confusing.
It's very confusing who's winning and who's losing inside the QAnon mythos in the eternal battle between the Deep State and the Patriots.
And that is the situation right now.
I don't think that Marco Rubio has been confirmed confirmed as Trump's pick for Secretary of State, but it's been floated out there and there's been really no pushback about it not being Rubio.
And QAnon's very mad about that because Rubio's been a pro-Ukraine kind of guy recently.
And so then the Senate majority leader vote just happened, and Senator Thune has won that, and he's going to be the majority leader for the Senate for the Republicans, which MAGA was not in favor of.
They wanted Rick Scott.
Rick Scott lost pretty decisively on the first ballot, and then Thune won on the second ballot.
So, we're already seeing picks from the incoming Trump administration that aren't really currying favor with the QAnon and MAGA communities.
So, some people are getting some rumble grumbles about what's going on here.
And what's so funny about this stuff is you see, I saw like Alex Jones had a poster like, Deep State infiltrating Trump administration.
It's like, no, he's picking them.
They're not infiltrating.
He's welcoming them in.
Infiltration would involve some form of deception or manipulation.
No.
These are literally his picks.
So if you have a problem with them, you can go to Donald Trump and be like, yo, Don, that pick sucked.
Shouldn't have picked that guy.
Shouldn't have picked that woman.
That was a shitty play.
Matt Gaetz infiltrated by an underage girl across state lines.
No, no, no.
It was the opposite.
That's not the same thing.
Never forget.
Despite the fact that he just got elevated to his position of power in media res, never forget that he was recently under investigation for that thing.
Yes.
Yeah, this is...
Matt Gaetz's AG is an aggressive fuck-you-to-the-world, pretty much.
This is pretty wild that he's just said...
that they've just decided, you know what?
Hey, fuck it.
Like, we're just gonna be dumb, angry assholes about this, and we're gonna put this prick in charge of prosecuting our enemies.
And that's what he's gonna do, because he doesn't have any moral...
he doesn't have any, like, actual qualms of following the law or doing anything.
If Trump tells him to try to indict Barack Obama, he's gonna do it.
He's gonna be like, uh, I accused Obama of crimes.
Let me get a grand jury to indict him.
Let's see how that goes.
It's gonna be great.
So yeah, this is gonna be...
Yeah, I mean, the deep state's gonna have to do some pretty good striking.
Yes!
They're gonna have to be doing some pretty bold striking here over the next four years.
We're gonna need to see some real deep state power.
I mean, I'm talking like, if you have control of some sort of like laser technology, like just to pull a random thing out of a hat, now would be the time to use it.
So dumb.
I hate it.
I used to love and hate it, now I just hate it.
Anyway, speaking of things that used to be that I hate, remember Q? That's right, the titular Q, the person who would lead QAnon if QAnon were a thing, which it is not.
Apparently Q wants to work for Trump.
Well, according to this little teaser headline from Mike.
Mike, is Q back, bending the knee to Trump?
Is he trying to reinstate his Q-level clearance?
Did he lose it?
Is there more than Q-level clearance?
There may be R-level clearance.
I mean, that's the next letter of the alphabet.
It's great.
So there's a website you can go to where you can beg Trump for a job.
Tell me who's pushing it.
Yeah, RFK Jr.
is pushing this website where you can go to and you can be like, hey everybody, I want to drop with the Trump administration.
And then people can vote you up and stuff.
It's more like a forum.
Yes, it's a forum where you can beg.
And Ron Watkins has gotten on that forum and said, put me in coach.
I want to work for the Trump administration.
Get me in there.
Not exactly letting the world on fire.
I don't think Ron has a ton of support right now on the forum.
Yeah, because, okay, so I'm on it right now, kind of toggling through the categories, and you can obviously sort it by hot and latest.
So let's go to hot for the economy.
Top vote is Ron Paul at the moment, it looks like, which no surprise there.
America's health.
I think you can tell some trolls are on here because Fauci is on here with the most on here.
There's no way.
Either that or all these people are just bumping the numbers via talking shit on him.
One of us should try to have a go.
Our credentials could just be like, literally up until a moment ago, I hated Donald Trump's guts.
But now that I see there's an opportunity to work in this administration, I've changed my mind.
And I think he's pretty great.
What a success story.
He really won me over.
There are obviously troll ones on here.
The health, food, and agriculture stuff is literally all Maha people, like people in the Kennedy Maha sphere.
Um, who, yeah.
Um, food and agriculture, yeah, like, Zen Honeycutt is one of the top ones.
That's like a...
When the hell was America ever healthy, by the way?
Um, did you see that Kennedy was, like, talking about foods that he wants to ban, and he was talking about, like, we're gonna get rid of Doritos and Mountain Dew and these kind of, just like, GamerVote, um...
Yeah, I was about to say, oh my god, we're about to get back Gen Alpha in spades.
Oh my lord.
It's just like, this is way more extreme than what Michelle Obama was suggesting ever.
Oh, he said he was going to make it so more raw milk was available, so we'll get some nice listeria outbreaks.
Yeah, straight from the tit.
Yes!
I want a milkman to come by my house every week, and I want a fucking cow in the back of the truck for me to just get on.
Oh, that's nice.
I clicked on Labor on this website, and the first thing I see was Adolf Hitler.
So that's nice.
Of course!
Why not?
How could it not be?
I don't know, man.
If you're one of these crazy one-issue voters, and you're just pissed off about your train delays, then maybe...
What if your voters make me just want to, like...
I don't know.
Abolish one-issue voters.
Just don't vote.
Shut up.
The top person on Labor is actually Mike Rowe, that dirty jobs guy, which just further proves, Mike, that these people would just love television.
They just love television.
But who could have more experience?
He's done so many dirty jobs!
And then when they stopped paying him because he went a little too conservative for cable network television, he pivoted to his other show, like Grimy Jobs or whatever.
It was the same thing, but with a different name.
We also call that the Bourdain.
Bourdain did that same thing.
That was also kind of Bill Maher.
He did Politically Incorrect, got fired, then just did Real Time, and it was literally the same show.
Yeah, Bill Maher, not a lot of range on that guy, huh?
Not really, no.
Weird.
I'm seeing Patrick Byrne as one of the top recommended for peace at home, justice, security, and immigration, which is like, didn't he flee the country?
Like, recently.
But anyway, so this list is filled with good people.
And then Ron's on here, obviously.
I'm sure he entered his own name.
Hell yeah, dude.
I'm telling you.
We need to put up Mike Rains.
Mike Rains is running...
He wants a job.
And why does he deserve one?
Because he used to hate Donald Trump.
And now, Mike Rains loves Donald Trump.
Out of fear for his own safety, now Mike Rades loves Donald Trump.
Oh god!
Biggest MAGA supporter there ever was.
I'm throwing you an education.
That's a category.
That's done.
Thank you.
You can re-educate.
You would think that out of all of us, I would be the person the most pulling for America going back to being great again, because I'm assuming whatever time in the past they're talking about...
Is what eventually turned into all those sitcoms where it was a fat schlubby loser and his beautiful hot wife.
And I want to be that fat schlubby loser.
Like, I would love to have a beautiful hot wife at, like, a family house that I support with my, like, I don't know, delivery job or what have you.
King of Queens.
That's what I want to be.
I want to be the king of queens.
And then somehow it listed the heaviest sigh in the history of the show for Mike Reigns.
I don't know why.
I'm just reading all this bullshit online of people being like, Senate Republicans aghast at Matt Gaetz being picked for Attorney General.
And Susan Collins is like, I don't know That's going to get through.
And it's like, oh, shut up.
You're all going to bend the knee.
You're all going to kiss Trump's ring.
Don't give me this shit.
Fuck you.
Oh, my God.
Yeah, you're all finally going to get in line with the rest of us that love Donald Trump.
Yes!
I mean, there was literally already some Democrats, like Mike, what's his name, Fetterman, saying that he was going to confirm some of the people that he's picked already.
It's like, don't already capitulate, please.
Please.
I mean, to be fair, that does seem like the ultimate Democrat move, though.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Again, unfortunately, the bad guys have taken a lot of the cool words.
Like, I would love to be able to call them cucks.
But, like, the right has got their stink all over it.
For a while, that was like the hot new insult, and then they jumped all over it and ruined it.
It just kind of encapsulates the feeling, you know?
It's just like, oh, yeah, you guys...
You guys are just watching as we're getting fucked.
You're just kind of sitting there taking it in.
It's great.
One of the top people for environmental and natural resources is Eamon Bundy.
Captain Pollution.
They summoned him using the five rings.
So that he can oversee the EPA. They're just like, Captain Pollution, what do you think?
And he's like, all of our factories should make toxic garbage!
And mild applause.
Okay, cool.
Speaking of toxic garbage, Arizona segment!
Maybe the best segue yet.
Hi, Haley.
It's time to talk about your home state of Arizona.
Thank you.
Yes, that's right.
Dear listener, Haley, aka Chaley, aka Arizona Right Watcher, AZRW, is our Arizona correspondent.
We always break off a little time for her to talk about the wonderful state of Arizona and the plight that they are currently in, which is similar but different every week, which has got to just be the most frustrating thing that I'm certain none of us are going to experience for the next four years.
How's it going, Chaley?
It's going.
You're so right.
Because like, you know, I had some hopium last week that maybe some Dems would flip some seats and it actually turned around and Republicans picked up a couple seats here and it just kind of sucks all around as far as Maricopa, except for Carrie Lake lost.
She definitely confirmed she lost finally.
It was pretty close.
That's why it took so long to finally get called officially.
But she fucking lost.
And...
The same week that she lost, she also finally lost her 2022 race because the Arizona Supreme Court rejected her effort to overturn that loss, which was...
A pipe dream anyway, but two losses in one week is pretty impressive.
I'm sure she's trying to become press secretary right now, which is funny because the other person that is really vying for the spot and even got a little highlight in Politico...
Is Melissa Lively, who's that Scottsdale woman who we talked about a few weeks ago who had that freakout in Target at a mass display and freaked out on some workers and was super into QAnon and then claimed to a bunch of articles that she was actually reformed while pretty openly saying that she was...
Actually, just doing it for her PR company and the media was suckers.
And she is now actually openly asking to be the press secretary and got a write-up in Politico and she confirmed to Politico that, yes, I lied about being reformed from QAnon.
I did that for my PR move company.
Um, so yeah, uh, Carrie versus Melissa Lively so far.
I hear that Tucker, there was a fake Tucker rumor that he could be the press secretary, so we'll see who gets it.
Maybe it'll be a surprise.
There are conspiracies, though, about losing, which is so funny to me because it's like, don't bug me with this shit.
It shouldn't have even been this close.
I think Gallego kind of got dragged down by the greater depression in the amount of votes that happened, like just the lesser amount of Democrats that showed out.
This year, like, overall, because a lot of close races just kind of, like, went for the Republicans here because it just kind of, like, I think a lot of down-ballot tickets got a little dragged down, and that's why Gallegos was a little bit even more close for comfort than I wanted.
But...
Yeah, so the conspiracies with Lake are basically just like, sure, there wasn't that much cheating this year in the battleground state, but that's also part of the conspiracy because they don't want you to look into the cheat of Cary Lake.
And it's like, why would that be...
Why would they only pick one race?
Why would...
And, you know, if I was going to pick a race, I would probably pick a little bit of a better one.
I would pick a few more to flip.
Uh, so there are some, like, conspiracies about the Lake win, but it's kind of just laughable, in my opinion.
I was shit-talking on Twitter.
I'm mainly on Blue Sky now, listeners.
There's a big jump happening.
Um, but I shit-talked on Carrie Lake a little bit on Twitter, and, like, even some local Republicans liked it, so it's like, lady, you're done.
And personally, I went to some of her, like, revote rallies back in 2022 when that was a thing, like, you know, the Cary Lake Truthers, and it didn't have any traction then.
Like, it...
Karen Lee triggers, man, if only.
I'm pretty sure she does exist.
Yeah, and like...
There were rallies, but they were more angry about the Trump election still.
It was more about that anger than Lake.
And like...
And Joe Altman even asked the crowd, like, are we going to stay here until they overturn the election?
And, like, literally nobody raised their hand.
He's like, all right, then I guess I'll just stay here myself.
Like, no traction at all.
No juice.
No juice.
It all happened in the courts and it never had a chance anyway.
It was just a fucking grift.
And I'm sure she'll grift off of this, but...
I did want to bring up the fact that QAnon is losing their shit over Lake Losing.
They are so pissed about this because it gives them their victim mentality that they need.
I saw one guy...
What's the name of the auditor guy they all hate?
Richard?
Stephen Richard?
Yeah, Richard.
Stephen Richard.
Like, I saw one guy saying, Stephen Richard's going to jail.
This is going to fucking happen.
And there are other people making up these conspiracy theories about how the deep state is going to import all these Mexicans and have them pour into Arizona.
And...
They're going to use all the armories and all the military equipment in Arizona to launch their spearhead to capture the southern sections of America.
And they needed Lake to not be in power because she was going to keep an eye and prevent that from happening.
But now that Lake has fallen, the American Southwest is going to collapse.
And the Reconquesta is going to begin.
They're just...
These people need to lose.
Because, again, conspiracy theories are for losers.
And if they're just winning all the time, then they really have nothing to bitch about.
And all they want to do is bitch.
So, yeah, the Carrie Lake stuff is incredible.
That was the election America needed to win, and we lost it, so we're fucked now.
It's great.
It's absolutely magical that they can be upset.
Their boy won in a fucking landslide, and they're still miserable.
It's incredible.
I know.
And then just because the Republicans, you know, they were already had a majority here in the state legislature, but they bumped it up a little teeny bit.
And the people who will be like the...
Senate Majority Leader is Janae Champ, who is, like, an incredibly pilled...
We did a whole episode on her because she was into, like, the gold fringe flag kind of conspiracies, like...
Frazzle drip.
There's just like every QAnon conspiracy she believes.
And she'll now be Senate Majority Leader.
She also stormed the Capitol with her bat-wielding husband and has harassed humanitarian groups at the border with militias.
So it's just cool all around here.
Literally, basically, Lake Losing and the abortion amendment passing are the only good things that happened.
We gotta take these wins when we get them these days.
We're gonna be living off of crumbs here for a while.
Yeah, so enjoy the Lake loss.
If she does not get picked for press secretary, you can also chalk that up to another loss, so maybe there'll be another LOL incoming, but yeah.
Nice.
Well, you know, again, we gotta take these devs where we can get them, and if we have to mine small victory out of Arizona every week, then so be it, you know?
Wouldn't that be a crazy flip for the next four years if Hailey becomes the ray of sunshine, just because it's just like a minor victory getting dug out through the hard work of the people in Arizona every week?
That would be some life-affirming role-reversal shit.
Maybe you guys are the Rebel Alliance, you know?
I believe in you and that veto pen.
You got him, Governor Hobbs.
You can do it until we have Governor Schneider.
He's going to move to Arizona.
He's going to be your new governor.
You're fucked, just so you know.
Mike, you said that like it was a reference, but I don't know what you're talking about.
Because I am not 30 or older.
Sike, I'm definitely 30 or older, and therefore I do.
But the point was made.
Anyway, on to the news!
From the digital headlines to the digital front lines, it's cues in the news.
Mike made a funny joke with this one.
Elon the shadow president.
Oh, sorry.
Elon Colon, the shadow president, or about to be deported.
And we both know that there's no fucking way he's going to be deported.
Unless it's just out of sheer frustration that he won't leave Donald Trump alone.
Man, he seems to be up that guy's ass really hard.
But just in terms of what he wants to do.
I'm sure Donald Trump would rather put him in the VP slot before he fucking deports his ass.
Oh yeah, but I mean, this is, the Elon-Trump dynamic is truly magical and confusing.
It is a situation where apparently he's been on the phone calls with Zelensky and the president of Serbia, both had Elon as co-president talking to them while Trump was talking to them, and Elon has been at Mar-a-Lago practically since the election, just sort of sitting on Trump's lap, just letting him know he loves him very, very much.
And this has led to a lot of people being like, what the fuck?
What's going on here?
Is Elon running the show?
And...
Then we got our breaking news that the Department of Government Efficiency, a.k.a.
DOGE, which is something Elon's obsessed with because his brain is tapioca, the DOGE committee is going to be formed and it's going to be co-chaired by Elon and Vivek.
Our boy Vivek is getting in there.
He's going to be part of the DOGE movement to totally streamline the government.
Dude, honestly...
I kind of respected the fact that it weaseled his way into what is going to be a position of technical power, at least for a while.
I mean, I thought that guy was done.
I thought I was never going to hear from that guy again in my whole life.
I mean, I'm sure I still hate his guts.
I don't think he's ever said or done a good thing ever in his life.
But the fact that I thought he was done and dusted, here he is weaseling his way in through Elon Musk's back door.
I am a child.
Yeah, I mean, wow, what a guy.
And also, for the love of God, now that I'm sure Elon Musk has the ability to listen in on everybody's conversations and recordings thanks to his government position, like, you know, government goo listening to this, get this message to your boss, Elon.
Hey, remember...
In all those cyberpunk dystopias that you read, when all the authors are writing that shit, there was one thing that the country was going through pretty hard and we all agreed about it, and that was that Russia sucks and we should defeat them because they were the worst.
So just remember that.
You cyberpunk-loving goon, difficult to square that and not also want to help Ukraine defeat Russia because defeating Russia is exactly what America was about when those guys were talking about uber-capitalism.
So, you know, if the world's going to fall to shit, at least let's get back to kicking Russia's ass.
Who's with me?
Not Elon Musk, that's for sure.
Yeah, that's a bummer.
It turns out that all the people that are in the top-level government positions now seem like they really want to just glaze all over Putin's donut.
I... I just can't.
It's just like Elon in charge of more things.
Elon more in our lives.
Elon just, I don't know.
It just gives me a headache.
It's just like, he doesn't have a good personality.
He's not funny.
I wish that he was the genius that they think he is.
Because then he could really use...
If he was the genius that he thinks he was, and he was also still the world's richest man, and then he became the shadow vice president or whatever, that seems like we're going to get to actual cyber...
I mean, right out of the book, cyberpunk.
It's coming.
Here we go.
Time to go chrome.
Cyberpsychosis.
The whole shit.
It's coming.
But the problem is that he's a moron.
He's a stupid idiot.
He's certainly got some sort of skill that you could confuse for charisma if you've never been around charisma in your life.
But whatever that skill is, it has nothing to do with putting me into a giant ass-kicking robot body or having like a...
Fucking hover car or any other cool thing that cyberpunk brings with it.
So we're only going to get the bad parts of cyberpunk.
We're going to get cars that look like shit and don't work properly.
And everything's going to be covered in...
Actually, no, because cyberpunk is covered in rain.
And the real cyberpunk is going to be all fire all the time.
Yeah, I'm currently living in a burning state.
It is incredible, the air quality in Massachusetts right now, which is terrible, even worse than terrible.
I come home from work and I'm like, ah, it's burning.
My state is actually on fire and I can taste it.
I can taste the burning.
It's delightful.
But yeah, so I mean, this obviously sucks.
There's not really, like, as of right now, there's not really a lot to talk about to it, aside from the fact that it sucks, because we don't know exactly what this Department of Government Efficiency is supposed to be, aside from a nightmare.
The big thing that I've seen, I'm sorry, Haley, but the big thing I've seen is that only Congress can create a new department, and that's probably not going to happen.
So right now, this is basically a committee, this is basically a commission that And it has a wind-down time of like the summer of 2026.
So pretty much for like a year and a half, Elon and Vivek are going to come up with ideas for how to streamline the government.
And then they're going to present them to Congress.
And then Congress is going to be like, yeah, you can go fuck yourself.
At which point, it'll be very interesting to see how Elon feels about being given a year and a half of busy work with like no real payoffs.
Like that's going to be like very like interesting.
Yeah.
Yeah, I think they'll recommend...
Because he was touting at one of the rallies, Elon, that like, oh, we're going to cut the government spending by like $2 trillion.
And I think he'll just like kind of do this like libertarian...
Like, far-right libertarian, melee-style, like, we're gonna get rid of the Department of Education.
We're gonna get rid of the Department of Agriculture.
We're gonna get rid of this.
And, like, that's what the Elon sycophants want, but we'll see how that plays out.
Because, you know, it's not exactly realistic, but maybe it is.
I don't know.
Who knows what's gonna happen going forward.
Yeah.
Yeah, man.
It's the Wild West out there.
Yippee-ki-yay!
Other Buckets, that Brooklyn Nine-Nine reference.
Remember that funny show about cops that everybody liked until they realized they were laughing about cops and everybody hated it overnight?
What a phenomenon.
But that's not the show.
This isn't the show for that sort of thing.
This is a show for us talking about a Fox News idiot to run the army.
Is this the same guy we lightly touched on in his bikini briefs at 9-11 or is this a different idiot?
Yeah, it's him.
I didn't cast my eyes forward far enough to see that we were going to be talking about him here again.
But boy, I mean, hey.
Consider that the trailer for this segment where I guess we're going to get back into more of him, the man, and not him, the idea of being fucking audacious enough to do a thirst trap photo shoot at the 9-11 memorial.
I actually have to hop off and jump into a meeting because we had a pre-meeting before this and we're running a little late.
But I just want to say on Pete Hegseth, That if you told me to design a real American patriot fascist, this is who I would design.
His tattoos are awful.
He's got like two deus volt references, including just the text deus volt.
He's got like an American flag with a rifle tattoo, like a cross, like 1776 in Roman numerals.
Just like an army unit tattoo.
Just like so many bad tattoos.
It's okay, Hayley.
Just admit you want to fuck him.
I get it.
It's okay.
Just the worst tattoos you've ever seen.
And he got kicked out of like...
Or he got, like, reprimanded by the military for, like, being an extremist.
And that's not...
They haven't, like, got...
There's not, like, full details on that, I think, and I would...
Too extreme for the military, for the United States military.
I would love to know what this guy was up to.
Like, what is this, some Patriot Front motherfucker?
So, I think he sucks.
He's also an airhead.
I've seen him on Fox News, and I can't think of a bigger airhead to be in this role.
so yeah he sucks that's bye bye Hayley I guess uh Wow, what a rude dude Haley is.
It's okay though.
Pretty soon she'll be logged off and then we can talk shit about her.
Ha ha, she's gone.
Let the shit talking commence.
No, so what else do we know about this guy aside from his stupid tattoos?
I don't know anything about this dude.
He basically thinks that the military should be exclusively used by white, straight males.
Probably Christian also.
He doesn't want women in combat roles.
He said Obama was a traitor.
He's about as hardcore right-wing as you can get, and all the idiots and goobers around are screaming about, yeah, finally, no more woke military!
It's just, well, you know, our military really isn't getting a lot of straight white dudes to sign up.
In order to fill out those numbers, we've been getting a lot of people who are not that.
Good luck hitting those recruitment goals with The guy in charge of our military basically hating the military if you're not literally basically an Aryan.
So this guy is super bad on a lot of levels.
And again, this is like the Matt Gaetz pick.
This is just Trump whipping his dick out and saying, boom, Republicans, you're going to confirm this guy.
And if you don't, I'm going to recess appointment him.
And you're not going to block me.
So you can all go to hell.
So this is just king shit of fuck mountain telling everybody that he's running the ship, and if you don't like it, you can kiss his ass.
So, delightful.
Again, I expect a lot of bullshit from Republicans before they cave, and even a recessed appointment is caving, because there were plenty of times when...
I remember the Democrats did it, and the Republicans also did it, I believe, where...
The Senate would be out of session, and they would just have somebody run into the Senate chamber, announce that the Senate was in session, and then say, now the Senate is out of session, everyone dismissed.
Therefore, the Senate was technically not in recess, and it prevented recess appointments from being made.
So, you can block recess appointments if you want to.
You can fuck with the procedure.
So, let's see these lunatics get voted down in actual confirmation hearings.
Let's see them actually block the recess appointments.
Spoiler alert, they won't.
These guys are going to get through.
This is the nature of the beast.
It's great.
I'm hearing a lot of performative bellyaching and crying, but proof's in the pudding.
I'll believe it when I see it when it comes to any of these people actually being shut down.
Yeah.
And in the meantime, the lighting, I mean, for the listener, obviously, we can't see that.
But now that we're entering our dark phase of the year, the lighting in Mike Raines' room has gotten progressively darker as the red radio.
It's like I'm speaking to Satan himself.
Yeah.
During these dark times, it's just incredibly apropos.
I mean, since I started talking, the microphone has started to cycle its light through, and it was blue there for a while.
But for a while there, Mike was all sorts of the Green Goblin from the Raimi films, just bathed in a red light, talking about how we're all fucked.
My reigns is something of a scientist himself.
Yes.
Alright, well, kind of a slow news week, or rather we didn't want to talk about too much of the news because the news sucks, so let's get into whatever mailbag we have for the week, shall we?
Our listeners got questions, we got answers.
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Chance that the show might be a little bit shorter than normal this week, folks.
But again, Haley had to take out.
So it's just me and Mike in the saddle for the rest of it.
So bear with us.
Yeah, we're pretty useless.
Anyways, Pancake Peasant asks, Who is Theo Vaughn?
I get the sense there's a whole new crop of podcasts and entertainment bros since 2020 that I'm just not plugged into Facebook or TikTok to be aware of who these guys are and why they matter.
We touched on this, but as far as I can tell, Theovan is kind of a comedian who has perfected this caricature of himself that he plays almost at all times now.
Sort of like a weird conservative goober Steve Colbert.
Yeah.
So he's just, like, this dumb guy.
He asks, like, dumb fuck stupid questions.
Like, he doesn't have two brain cells in his head.
He's got, like, a mullet.
He's sort of, like, you know, he's not, like, as dumb as Joe Dirt.
But he's, like, if Joe Dirt's more educated, slightly more educated brother, like, had a podcast.
But I'm pretty sure that he's a comedian who's doing a bit and that it's just sort of taken over his life because it's made him really successful.
It turns out he plugged into a community of people that were on the come up.
And so I think that's just sort of what he's locked into doing now.
I mean, that's just sort of his life.
But as near as I can tell from just seeing brief clips of him doing stuff on TikTok on my commute from work during the week, that is his deal.
I could be completely wrong.
Somebody could just be like, no, that's totally him.
That's just who he is.
But I don't think that's the case.
It certainly doesn't read that way, I'll tell you that much.
Yeah, I have no idea about this guy.
This is totally out of my frame of reference, so I just have to roll with whatever Elle's saying and nod sagely.
There's like a crop of these young sort of like...
They run the gamut between being fully embracing conservative shit and then just sort of towing the line and being sort of like, ah, I'm a comedian, so sometimes I say an edgy conservative thing or whatever.
And he's one of that crop of comedians.
Shane Gillis is probably the...
The one who's just sort of like, his deal is just like, I'm not a conservative, but like, that's, and like, then, you know, they get a little, like, closer to the deep end from there.
And a bunch of them are doing quite well, you know?
That, like, dude that, like, everybody thought was going to cost Trump the election.
Everybody thought that was going to happen.
Oh, what young, doe-eyed optimists we were.
Yeah, I mean, I thought it was so funny.
I was just like, this does really look bad for him, but you guys don't know Donald Trump the way that apparently...
This is the same Donald Trump, right?
That's fucking Teflon.
He can say or do whatever the fuck he wants.
And that includes the people that he hires to speak on his behalf at his rallies.
But yeah, that guy, whatever his name is, is another one of those guys, like just conservative dumbfuck comedians using their digital TikTok platform or whatever to just sort of amass an audience and make a lot of money.
So that's that.
Yeah.
So that brings us to Eric, the Team State Operative, who asks, Blue Anon has gone full MAGA with their election denialism.
What's the wildest stolen election conspiracy theory you've seen so far?
It's mostly the Starlink shit.
We've stepped on a mailbag answer previously in the show.
I'll have to go on TikTok and do more stuff.
The main thing I also saw was the quote-unquote 15 million missing votes where people are like, oh, Biden got this number and Trump got this number last time.
And that's like 15 million less.
So this is ridiculous.
And the answer to that question is the fact that they're still counting.
People get pissed and off about the close elections take forever to count.
They miss the fact that a lot of these elections take forever and even though they're settled, the actual final number hasn't come out yet.
So my answer to this question would be all of them because first of all, just the hypocrisy.
That is supposed to be the difference between the liberal and the conservative.
Liberals are supposed to have that little voice inside of them that prevents them from being immune to hypocrisy.
And, you know, you can't really be a Blue Anon.
Blue Anons are just conservatives that are confused.
They haven't wandered into their right territory yet.
They'll get there.
Because it's just, like, it's just nonsensical.
But then, in addition to that, to have any conspiracy theory regarded that would...
You would have to be giving conservatives enough credit to rig an election so efficiently that they got a plausible landslide victory.
I don't buy it.
I feel like that they would either, like, rig it so that it was, like, razor thin, but barely.
And then they just cover up the couple of counties, like, where, like, stuff could go.
They're just like, well, you know, now that we're in power, we're just not gonna look into that.
Uh, Maybe.
A landslide victory where it's like laughably, ridiculously, like Blue Massachusetts flipping red, like Red California crushing it, like a 100% popular vote.
Like some dumb shit like that that's obvious.
Yeah, I could buy that too.
But plausible landslide?
I don't think they have it in them, man.
That would be some intelligent shit.
Yeah, I don't...
This didn't happen.
I mean, just get over yourselves.
It's very silly, but the 15 million thing, the votes are coming in, and by the end of this election, we're going to have a number, and it's probably going to be close to what the Biden vs.
Trump number was, and then we're just going to move on, because that's what you do.
Life sucks.
You lost.
I get it.
Ain't nobody happy about it, but that's the way the proverbial cookie crumbles.
But as for crazy stuff, I guess I'll have to dig more into TikTok and learn about how the race of giants stole the election on behalf of Trump by carrying massive quantities.
Quantities of mail and doubts.
Odin got involved.
That is that Odin was here and he, it turns out, is willing to help Reagan election for Donald Trump.
Yes.
Tawanda asks, how long do you think it will take for Trump and Elon's bromance to implode and how stupid will the reason be?
I don't think the reason will be stupid.
I think it's mostly just Elon's going to want a lot of say in what Trump's doing as president, and I don't think Trump really likes him.
So I think at the end of the day, the douche thing is going to displease Elon and And I think the reason why they put Vivek in that is that they know that Elon isn't going to actually put any work into it.
He just wants to have his name on it because he just wants to say, oh, I was in charge of Doge and I made the government better.
And also, Trump is just going to be able to appoint him to a place that's as far away from Trump as Trump wants him to be.
And if Elon doesn't...
And if he wants Elon to not see it coming, Elon will just wake up and then go to his door and he will be met with a member of the Secret Service who will just be like Mr.
Musk.
The president has appointed you to go to a place that is far away from him.
We've been instructed to safely escort you there.
And he's just going to be like, no, no, God, Donald Trump broke up with me.
I feel like it's either going to happen within the next three months or it's not going to happen at all.
If three months from now, after the inauguration and all that good shit, Elon Musk is still in every photo op of Donald Trump as his little ackee, his Grima Wormtongue, I think that's probably going to be the case the whole way through.
Which is going to be great, because then I can see J.D. Vance really getting pissed off at Elon Musk.
Papa Teal, why don't you help me out with this Musk problem?
I don't have the billions of dollars I need to fight Elon Musk.
Oh, yeah.
I mean, that's the thing.
That whole Teal, Vance, Elon Trump thing is going to be some serious, ridiculous Game of Thrones bullshit behind the scenes.
Because you know that Peter Teal only backed Vance as his boy to just get his hand up the president's ass.
Imagine going through all that trouble.
There's just already a stronger billionaire than you with his own hand, just literally next to the president with his hand up his ass.
It's like, oh my god!
Yeah, it's so awesome that Teal did all this work and now Teal's like, yes, I've done it.
I control the vice president.
And then Musk's like, fuck you, I control the president.
Boom.
How do you like them apples?
Yeah.
Yeah.
How my nuts taste, Teal.
Boom.
Gotcha.
Boom.
Roasted.
Lots of people getting posterized this election.
It's been a fucking bloodbath.
And the bloodbathing will continue.
It's about to get real Elizabeth's battery up in here, if you get what I'm saying.
Yeah.
Yeah, and it's going to be very interesting because this segues into our last question, which is Salty Bastard asking, how do you think QAnon will fare with Trump in the next four years considering his position with Israel and their underlying anti-Semitism?
Do you think there will be a fracture in their community or will they all coalesce around him?
Actually, my pinned tweet is about this, and I think that Well, the fact that you have...
First of all, thank you, listener.
This is actually an incredibly juicy question.
Like, I didn't know how interested I was in the answer to this until you asked this question.
Yeah.
Because in my mind, I was just like, I mean, they should just go into, like, prayer mode, right?
Because, like, they're fucking Messiah 1.
Like, they were just like, Donald Trump's gonna do it!
And then he did it!
Like, it's like, cool.
Like, sick.
Now it's time to be pious and, like, worship Trump.
Yeah.
But I can see it going other ways.
It is a conspiracy theory movement.
Yeah, oh, like Dan Bilzerian, or however you say his name, like the poker player guy turned fucking anti-Semite edgelord, he posted a tweet like, oh man, I hope Trump's really just playing the game here, because if he's owned by the Jews, then we're fucked.
So, I mentioned this, is that the fact that Trump is just going to be absolutely slipping the tongue to Bibby all day, every day, and they're going to just destroy Palestine, and Israel's going to get everything they want, and we might have a war of Iran.
It's going to be great.
So all of that shit's going to happen.
And QAnon is going to have to do a lot of mental gymnastics, which they will, because Trump's supposed to be the peace president, but he's going to be incredibly warlike.
And Trump is supposed to crush Israel, but he's going to absolutely support them and give them all the funding they've ever wanted and more.
So you're going to have this very impossible to square circle.
And there are going to be some QAnon promoters who leaned into, they were more on the side of anti-Semitism than they were on Trump Good.
So those people are going to leave the movement.
The other side, the people that are just like, oh, I love Trump so much, they're going to tough it out no matter what.
It's just going to be Trump, and Israel will explode because he put the magic power in behind the scenes that we can't see, but it'll be revealed in the shocking truth down the line, blah, blah, blah.
So they're going to find justifications for it.
The real issue here is the fact that Trump's brain is tapioca.
And it's going to be real interesting to see that dynamic play out where, like, who is going to support him all the way through this thing?
Because, like we just said, like Peter Thiel and J.D. Vance, like they're getting frozen out.
Like Elon's running the show here.
What happens if Elon gets frozen out?
What if, like, Steve Bannon makes a move and cuts Elon off?
When do people start actually telling our media, yo, it's OK to report on the fact that Trump is fucking demented and shouldn't be president because his brain's spaghetti.
And does our media actually do that?
And how does that whole thing play out?
The drama over the 25th Amendment and Trump's health is going to be a big story over the next four years because...
I personally don't see how he's going to last all four years, given where he's at.
I mean, he was literally on the campaign trail talking about how, yeah, one day my dementia's going to get the best of me, and then when that happens, yep, them's the breaks.
So, not great.
Shouldn't have voted for a guy who says shit like that on the trail, but hey, America!
So yeah.
Where we're going to go with all that, and all that, I mean, it's just...
You can tell why political reporters wanted this administration so bad, because it's going to be catnip.
It's going to be so delicious.
And they're going to get four years of doing the same shit they did to Biden, where it's like, Trump's inauguration.
Is he not going to be fucking incoherent?
Then he's going to have to do the State of the Union.
Then he's going to have to do a trip to Europe and do the whole hugs and kisses with all the European leaders and the European Union and talk about NATO and stuff.
And how's he going to handle that?
And It's going to be just this endless, like, just cognitive check, pass, fail that he's going to be dealing with.
It's going to be just, it's going to be a mess.
It's going to be a real mess, and people are going to navel-gaze the shit out of it.
And we are going to be fucked dealing with it, because it's not great.
It's not great to have a president who doesn't know what day it is.
I mean, I'm sure it's gonna be fine.
And I'm sure Ukraine is gonna be fine.
And I'm sure that Palestine is gonna be fine.
And I'm sure that Taiwan is gonna be fine.
But if I wasn't so sure about these things, I would be pretty worried that if Trump just lets Russia scoop one and Israel scoop the other, that China's gonna just kinda crack its knuckles and be like, well, here we go!
It's morphin' time!
Taking other people's plans!
That would be pretty funny.
And I know it looks pretty rich coming from an American, but my whole life I've been like, that's fucked up.
That's a thing that shouldn't be done or should never have been done.
Unfortunately, like...
Dude, unfortunately, I can't unborn myself.
I could kill myself, but I don't think that's going to solve anyone's problems.
Unless it's part of an elaborate ritual to get my consciousness into a machine.
And as long as that machine is now built by Elon Musk, that would be pretty cool.
Otherwise, I would just end up being inside the mind of a guy in a robot suit.
Yeah.
Well, if you killed yourself, we could have potentially obtained the Loosh to use for whatever purposes that would aid us.
I don't know how Loosh works, but I'm sure I could listen to the experts and find out what's going on.
Dude, it ain't my fault.
Blame it on the Loosh.
So what are you looking forward to, sir?
You know, that's a good question.
I've been playing that new Dragon Age game, and I am looking forward to playing more of that, just because it's been a while since I've put any sort of semi-serious time in a single-player video game.
And that's been interesting.
The holiday season is approaching, which I do just sort of generally like.
Our Friendsgiving came and went.
It was fun, but I only stayed for a few hours.
Funny things happened, but I can't really discuss them, even on this podcast, because the wrong ears may perk up if I were to speak on it.
It was an amusing three hours, to say the least.
And then, yeah, I mean, it's still not out for a few more weeks, but I'm, like, surprisingly excited for the new Nosferatu film.
The trailers for that have been killer, and that director has, like, a great visual style, and I really believe that he is going to crush it with this one, and I mean...
You talk about people doing practical shit in their movies.
Like, he just gave an interview recently with him.
It's just like, yeah, we did all of our rat stuff practically, and when I made that call, I did not know that rats are incontinent.
So, that smelled really bad.
It's like, that's a human moment, you know?
Like, if you're just like a guy, and you're just like, the rat handlers will take care of it.
Certainly, if there's like a litter box or something or whatever, it's like, no, dude, shit just falls out of them.
That's just their life, dude.
So, you know, that's pretty funny.
But I guess the number one thing I'd be looking forward to is getting back to fucking playing D&D. Life happened simultaneously to the couple of campaigns that I was in, and one of them just picked back up, but the other one that we had just started got derailed, like, indefinitely due to one of the people involved getting into a car accident, which they are fine, thank goodness, but their car was very much not fine, which is a big thumbs down.
And it's like, goddammit, I just want to play D&D. It's my favorite thing.
Yeah.
I hear all that.
There's a small list of things that I am excited for to make up for the fact that Haley is now here to say burritos.
So I will say burritos.
No, I'm looking forward to my continuing wearing of suspenders.
I've gotten into them.
They're incredible.
I love them.
My grossly malformed body makes belts painful and awful.
We had this discussion off air last week, I believe.
But yeah, I'm right there with you.
Unfortunately, my grossly malformed body makes it difficult for me to keep a shirt tucked in.
Uh, so once my super soldier serum has shrunken me down to the point where I can hopefully get that problem licked, I might join you on team suspenders all the way.
They have always seemed more comfortable than a belt for my fat body.
Yeah.
Oh, man.
Yeah.
So, Team Suspenders, loving that.
Also enjoying the fact that we're, like, creeping towards, like, the colder season.
Enjoying, like, the fall, all that good stuff.
DJ Minimal Effort and I have been taking walks, like, over a trail, like, once a week now.
So that's, like, my weekly respite from the world is going out and just...
Talking that poor man's ear off, and then him just talking about frogs or whatever.
Have you asked DJ Menelma ever what he thinks about the Spider-Man Magic the Gathering set that's coming out?
Or how every other set that's coming out from here on forward is going to be something like Spider-Man or Final Fantasy or Back to the Future or some more shit?
I haven't gotten into that with him.
I will bring that up the next time I see him.
I'm sure that he'll probably just be like, tell me when the set is Battletoads or Broforce.
It'll just be like, you know what?
Oh god, do I have to hear about Broforce?
Oh, let me tell you how much I have to hear about Broforce.
The other thing I have to hear about very often is he will bring up Dungeons& Dragons and then he will talk about how great you are at Dungeons& Dragons.
I have been endlessly regaled about how you are a Pantheon level D&D player.
That's flattering, but also a little confusing, because I haven't played D&D with that guy in a long time.
I mean, granted, I haven't played D&D for a while now.
I do think I'm pretty good at it.
So it is nice to be affirmed.
So thank you, DJ Minimal Effort, for the kind words.
I am pretty good at D&D. Like I said, it is my favorite thing to do.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's about it for me.
That and sleep.
Boy, howdy, am I going to take a nap today?
It's going to be incredible.
It's a good day for it, especially because of the time that we're recording.
It's just now turning five o'clock, and it's fucking black as pitch out in the outside.
Yes!
Hell yeah, dude.
Like, who needs the sun, you know?
Anyway, so that's going to do it for the week.
Like I said, short show, since we're down at, I'm over here towards the end, but thank you for listening and supporting the show.
If you'd like to support the show, but still for free, you can do so by giving us a five-star review wherever you get your podcasts from.
If you have money and you want to donate it to the cause, Lord knows we will take it.
You can donate at patreon.com slash pokerpolitics, your donation of $5 per month.
Gets you access to all of our bonus content, past, present, and future.
Thank you to all of our beautifuler babies all up in the crib, including our newest beautifuler baby, triumphant trumpet sound, to gay commie brain probe builder.
Excellent.
Somebody needs to be out there building those commie brain probes for the gays.
So thank you so much for becoming our coolest, most recent, beautifuler baby.
If you have money and you don't want to give it to us, Lord knows we understand that.
There's a lot of good ways to do good with it in the world right now.
Maybe just tuck it away for yourself before the price of eggs turns into $1,000 per carton.
But if you want to do some good with it, love146.org.
They're an organization whose vision is the end of child trafficking and exploitation.
Thanks, Zozy, DJ Minimal Effort, my previous D&D compatriot, for the use of our original theme song, Accidentally Remixed by Mike Rains, and what you heard at the top of the show.
Thanks to our buddy, Frosty, for all of his voiceover work.
He's the voice of Q, the voice of all of our bumps, etc.
You can find Frosty on BlueSky at FrostyVO.
You can find the show you're listening to, the Adventures in Hellworld podcast, on Twitter, at Hellworld with a Q instead of an O.
I'm on there talking shit about a variety of non-political subjects, so you can ignore me if you don't care about anything about politics.
So you can find me on Twitter, at Hellworld Fatty, that's again with a Q instead of an O.
Chaley, aka Haley, aka Arizona Rightwatch, aka AZRW, on all social media platforms, if you're looking for more Arizona crazy madness.
And our expert in all things Q and on Crazy, can be found on all social media platforms that are worth their shit, at Poker and Politics, So, for another successful episode of the Avengers in Hell World podcast, I have been one of your hosts, the Mysterious Hell, signing off for both myself and our co-host who had to jet earlier to make an important meeting, our expert in all things Arizona Crazy, Chaley Haley, Arizona Rightwatch, AZRW, and our expert in all things QAnon Crazy, Mike Rains, a.k.a.
Poker and Politics.
Good speed, patriots!
Good speed, patriots!
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