Mike gets accused of being a QAnon supporter. 60 Minutes airs a not good segment on QAnon. We answer the questions "What is Operation Lockstep?" and "What is a podcast that's inside a podcast?" Get bonus content on PatreonSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/hellwqrld. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
| Time | Text |
|---|---|
| Hello, everybody, and welcome to another episode of Adventures in Hellworld. | |
| I am Mike Rains, a.k.a. | |
| PokerandPolitics, and I am joined, as always, by Sarge. | |
| Hello from the internet. | |
| And the mysterious El. | |
| Hello, my beautiful babies. | |
| First try! | |
| Nailed it. | |
| Boom. | |
| The hyper-efficiency and professionalism of this podcast knows no bounds. | |
| So this week, I have become a bit of a story, and thankfully we're now all rich and famous because we have sold out in our now-supporting QAnon, which is how you make money by being a part of this community, by aggressively grifting suckers. | |
| And on top of that, there's been a bunch of other mainstream media news about QAnon going on, and all that other fun stuff. | |
| But first of all, we'll have to let you know that this might not be for everybody. | |
| Content warning there, friends. | |
| We're going to be talking about QAnon, and we're going to have to talk about some pretty grim stuff over the course of discussing QAnon. | |
| So this podcast is not for sensitive listeners, or for babies, or whatever. | |
| I would sooner die than reload another Zincaster. | |
| Yes, agreed. | |
| I would literally rather just commit seppuku here in co-op Japanese culture out of shame. | |
| Just walk into the ocean. | |
| You would be much like Ron Watkins co-opting Western culture for Japanese culture by wearing a cowboy hat. | |
| You would commit seppuku because you're a proud American. | |
| That's how proud Americans kill themselves. | |
| By ritualistic suicide that was done by people from Japan. | |
| Well, now that we've gotten through our totally professional content warning that was supposed to not just be me vamping, let's get to the part of the podcast where we beg people for their support to keep this thing afloat! | |
| Yes, this rickety ship that is taking on water could definitely use our listeners' help. | |
| And if they wish to do so, they can tell people about the podcast, just spread the good word about what we're doing here. | |
| And if they have some money to give to us, go to patreon.com slash pokerpolitics. | |
| If us cretins are not worthy of your cold hard cash, which again, I don't know how that would be possible, please go to love146.org and they actually fight human trafficking, which is something that QAnon talked about back in the day, but then they gave up on once they realized that Donald Trump wouldn't be president anymore. | |
| So yes, help people that are actually fighting the real good fight in this world. | |
| Yeah, the most important thing for all of our beautiful babies to do is just spread the word. | |
| Because it doesn't cost you anything, and helping us grow will help us reach more ears with our patented brand of slapdash nonsense. | |
| Yes, and that's what we're here for, is just the slapdashery and the crippling unprofessionalism. | |
| It's not unprofessional, it's just unrefined. | |
| It's like all those aspiring filmmakers in the 90s that were just out there doing it with handheld cameras. | |
| Artisanal. | |
| Yeah, we're artisanal. | |
| We're like real moldy cheese. | |
| Yes, that is exactly what we are. | |
| We're like that hot unpasteurized shit that you can only get from like a chef friend that you know. | |
| Yeah, that is going to be our reality show project where we sneak into dairies and milk cows and then use their unpasteurized milk to make stuff illicitly and then sell it on the black market. | |
| I think it'll be like Cow Chippers is the working title, but we got some ideas. | |
| Cheese edits! | |
| Yes! | |
| We'll put up a poll if you want Cow Tippers or Cheese Bandits or if you have better ideas for our wacky hijinx reality show. | |
| It's like Moonshiners, only for milk. | |
| Cow Tippers sounds like an old Disney Channel movie. | |
| Adventures in Hellworld presents, colon, Cheese Bandits. | |
| Yes, exactly. | |
| But as I was bringing up unprofessionalism, the good people at Uproxx and The Daily Dot decided that I am a QAnon promoter. | |
| And this was a very interesting and hilarious turn of events. | |
| Mike got pilled! | |
| Yes, I have seen the light. | |
| I have realized that all of my previous denouncements of QAnon were in vain and wrong, and that QAnon is actually right about everything. | |
| Before, where they were going, Mike was not going. | |
| But now, where they're going, Mike is going, and all of us are going. | |
| Yes! | |
| And hopefully I'm bringing along Sergeant L, because where we podcast one, we podcast all. | |
| I see what you did there. | |
| Is there money in the hills? | |
| Because I could learn to love Q. | |
| I love Q and Stop Fearing the Bomb. | |
| Yes, Doctor Strange Alove with a Q instead of an L with Alove. | |
| That is our new, also our new project. | |
| These people don't know, maybe the L in my name stands for Lin Wood and I've been poked the whole time. | |
| I think that's his actual professional name is L. Lin Wood. | |
| I think he goes by his middle name. | |
| How dare you out me like that? | |
| I'm like Banksy. | |
| That was supposed to be my greatest secret that everybody already knew. | |
| I don't even know Banksy's greatest secret, but I'll have to find out one day. | |
| Bro, just Google search, who is Banksy? | |
| It's pretty fucking obvious at this point. | |
| This guy, that's probably Banksy, because here's all this evidence supporting that, and he's like a weird artist. | |
| It's like, okay, cool. | |
| It was like all the people that didn't know that Daft Punk's identity was just widely known. | |
| It's just like, you do know that at the end of the day, checks are getting cut to somebody that's not just called Daft Punk, right? | |
| The money. | |
| It's not literal robots. | |
| Yeah, it's like one of them's legal name was Daft and the other one's legal name was Funk, and that was what they were signing their contracts with. | |
| If only they had done that, like the way Teller changed his name to literally just Teller. | |
| They needed to own the gimmick and just go whole hog with it. | |
| Well now they're doing any of that shit because they broke up. | |
| Fuck Q's in the news. | |
| We're talking about Dead Punk's in the news! | |
| Yes, yes indeed. | |
| Dead Punk is dead and the world has lost their French robot musicians and we weep bitter tears. | |
| There's only sadness. | |
| There's only sadness and a lack of French techno that we have to live with now. | |
| So at this moment, we are going to attempt to play the Q as in the use bumper and see if Zencaster destroys that. | |
| I started riffing because I thought we had just abandoned the bump altogether. | |
| There was a lot of pre-bump riffing because I thought the bump was dead, along with the riff. | |
| Yeah, along with the bump. | |
| Hey, Zencaster batted a nice crisp 50% this week, so gotta give it to them. | |
| It's really good. | |
| Anyway, so what's life like on the other side of the tracks there, Mr. Mike Rains, now that you've been inducted into the Spooky Matrix by The Groove? | |
| I'm in all of these things. | |
| I now see the code. | |
| So how the fuck did you get outed as a supposed QAnon devotee? | |
| Okay, so what happened was Jessica Toomer, who writes for the Daily- as a contributor for the Daily- for Uproxx, posted a thing where you just do this thing where you go grab dumb stuff you find on Twitter and whatnot. | |
| And she took a tweet of mine that was me sarcastically talking about how Biden was to blame for the destruction of Texas. | |
| Ah yes, Biden and his diabolical weather machine. | |
| Yes, exactly. | |
| And she took this and published it as though it was actually a thing that I really believed. | |
| And then, because God, the guy who has like the Campy, cartoon, Face of God, Avatar. | |
| You've seen it on Facebook. | |
| Your liberal aunt shares it. | |
| Yes, your liberal aunt shares God's witty bon mots and all this other stuff, and he has a community called Heaven. | |
| My mom talks about it all the time. | |
| She is my aunt and my mother. | |
| It's weird. | |
| Don't ask questions. | |
| The whole thing is God, being a plagiarist, grabbed her article and then further dubbed me a Q-Leaver in his article. | |
| This was brought to my attention by people who read me on Twitter. | |
| I immediately began yelling at God and Uproxx about this. | |
| I made God repent, which is kind of a cool thing. | |
| God did a cross out of my section and then put up an update saying an earlier form of this article contained a tweet from Poker and Politics that was a joke. | |
| So, God got on his wagon and fixed this. | |
| As we speak, I'm looking at the actual article on Uproxx from Jessica Toomer, and it is not updated. | |
| It has not been changed at all. | |
| I am still a QAnon supporter in the eyes of Uproxx, which is awesome. | |
| Alice in Wonderland, baby! | |
| Alice and Wonderland, yes. | |
| So what's it like having stepped through the mirror, man? | |
| How's it going? | |
| Piles of money, lunatics coming to me with their ideas for why what Ellen DeGeneres said on her television show today is proof that she is about to be executed for treason and pedophilia. | |
| How many satanic child sex rings have you broken up? | |
| Seven. | |
| Oh my god. | |
| It's grueling. | |
| When I see Martin Geddes and all these other people talking about life as a digital soldier, I had no idea how hard the work was. | |
| This is way worse than I could have ever imagined. | |
| The horrors I've seen, the things I've viewed, it's life-altering. | |
| It's truly devastating. | |
| Are you now a Holocaust denier and believe all the Jews were sent to work on slave camps on the moon? | |
| I haven't gotten that pilled yet. | |
| It's close. | |
| I've been talking to some people, they've made some arguments, and I'm now willing to buy into Ice Nazis, the way Jordan Sather has told me to. | |
| I'm good with the Ice Nazis. | |
| I'm a squish on the whole Michelle Obama thing, but I think I can get there. | |
| Have you bonded with Agumon yet? | |
| I have yet to do that. | |
| They're holding out on me. | |
| I think I have to be a level 7 Thetan before I'm allowed to do that. | |
| Because at some point as a digital soldier you will be expected to transform into a digital champion to save the digital world. | |
| There's no way Mike gets that reference. | |
| You've gone too deep. | |
| Just the fucking look of deer in headlights. | |
| Agumon? | |
| Eyes glazed over, having no fucking idea what an Agumon is. | |
| I was gonna let it slide, because you rolled with it pretty well, but sorry, I just started calling you out, Mike Rains. | |
| You don't give a shit about Digimon! | |
| When you kept saying digital, I figured it was Digimon, but I don't- I do not know the lore of Digimon. | |
| So that's your three favorite Digimon right now. | |
| Go. | |
| No Googles. | |
| Didji and Mon, they create the name of the title. | |
| You just asked about an impossible task, like, because if you looked at the big-titted angel Digimon, you would never in a million years be able to guess Angemon or Angewomon. | |
| I think it's Angewomon, right? | |
| It's Angewomon, and then there's Angemon. | |
| Yeah, and also, is there like a Devilmon too? | |
| There's Devimon, and then there's... Digimon is real dumb. | |
| Digimon was for babies. | |
| Devimon talks like Christopher Walken. | |
| I'm glad that we went past Pokemon, past Yu-Gi-Oh, and directed Digimon. | |
| Just being as obscured and as crushing as possible right now. | |
| I mean, QAnon supporters are the ones that are talking about being digital soldiers. | |
| If QAnon never wants to talk about playing a card game while literally riding motorcycles around a racetrack, then we can start talking about Yu-Gi-Oh. | |
| Digimon might be our most mainstream reference to date. | |
| It depends on where you rate the Blade movies, Blades 2 and 3. | |
| I had no idea we were this obscure. | |
| I was faking getting red and pilled by the Uproxx article. | |
| You guys are actually redpilling me about how completely off the grid we are. | |
| Yeah, well, we need to come up with a different color of pill to discuss when we start forcing our pop culture nonsense out of its throat. | |
| Blue pill, you jamokes! | |
| There are two pills in that scene, a red pill and a blue pill. | |
| But blue pill is supposed to be reality, you dummicks. | |
| Like, I'm not talking about... I'm talking about ascending to a higher plane of pop culture knowledge. | |
| So you're saying be ultra red pill? | |
| Yeah. | |
| No, because I don't want it to be Red Pill Plus, because then people are just going to conflate us with conservative lunatics, like they have already done with Mike Rains, which is ostensibly what we're talking about. | |
| Right. | |
| Sarge suffers an earthquake and is dead. | |
| I can't protect my elbow. | |
| But yeah, we need some sort of fluorescent purple pill that we can give to some... Oh no, because purple pills, that was a G12 song. | |
| Yes. | |
| Green pill? | |
| I was thinking yellow pill, because pop references are pop culture, which is popcorn, so you go yellow, because that's my brain connecting dots. | |
| You want our pop culture knowledge to be a piss pill? | |
| Yes! | |
| Hey, I don't know that we can do better, I mean... Anyway, let's get back on track. | |
| You're not really a Q-Robot now, are you? | |
| Are you Mike Rains? | |
| Please Papa Mike Ray and say it ain't so! | |
| It's not so, dearest Elle, my beautiful baby. | |
| It is in fact not true that I am a supporter of QAnon, no matter what Uproxx says in their article that they still will not pull down, which is awesome. | |
| So yes, Uproxx, mortal enemies of our podcast because I just love the fact that these people took one tweet I made and they didn't even look for any context or any information about me. | |
| They were just like, this guy said a thing that might be a joke, it might not be. | |
| Nope, QAnon supporter, boom. | |
| And that was it. | |
| So, like, I am now, like, tarred by that forever on the internet, which is really weird. | |
| That's a heavy price you pay for having Twitter juice. | |
| Yeah. | |
| Yep. | |
| That's my life. | |
| That is my place. | |
| You got the juice on Twitter, and that makes you a bona fide expert. | |
| And apparently, if that means that when you say that Biden has a weather machine, it's true. | |
| Yes. | |
| And you certainly believe that. | |
| There could be no sarcasm there. | |
| No. | |
| QAnon expert Mike Raines confirms Joe Biden has a weather machine. | |
| We never found out if they put the pain lasers back in the Oval Office. | |
| Yes. | |
| That's one of the things Q said, that they took a bunch of tech out of the Oval Office before Trump got in, right? | |
| That was one of his first ones. | |
| Yeah, there was technology inside the Oval Office that Obama had booby-trapped the White House | |
| so when Trump came in, he was going to get hit by the CIA heart attack gun | |
| or whatever other kind of nonsense they were making up. | |
| Yeah, they were like, the stupid White House Obama booby traps turned our ripped Adonis Donald Trump into this doughy orange loser. | |
| That's the new narrative. | |
| And him with the Lex Luthor fat gun. | |
| Yeah, it was like how Palpatine got all mutilated after he barbecued Mace Windu. | |
| That's why Trump is the way he is now. | |
| He strode into the Oval Office like a spry, buck-seventy, fit, trim, ready to rock, and then the Obama fat race got to him. | |
| He was like, NO! | |
| But it's a burden I shall bear for America! | |
| That's why that doctor said that he was the most in-shape president he had ever seen in his life, is because the doctor was operating on pre-Obama fat laser Donald Trump. | |
| Yes! | |
| And then, oh boy, Obama definitely hit him with the leg enfeebling laser. | |
| Yeah. | |
| So somewhere in an underground bunker, Obama's tapping his fingertips together, going, you'll never be able to walk down a ramp again! | |
| Hit him with the ball blazer, and that's why he has to have that majestic comb over. | |
| Yeah. | |
| So Mike, now that you're pilled, you must have been enraged by this 60 Minutes Q piece that was made for everyone's grandmas to find out about Q. | |
| Yeah, this 60 Minutes piece, the one thing that blows my mind about all media when they start talking about Q, they always say Q communicates to his followers through cryptic riddles. | |
| And I've made you guys go through like the first 50 or so drops. | |
| Were there any cryptic riddles? | |
| Did you ever do you read anything that was like esoteric knowledge that was mysterious and tricky? | |
| No, I mean, it was it was dripping with riddles. | |
| That's why we named one of them the Riddler, right? | |
| Yes, they weren't just dumb leading questions or questions that were unanswerable. | |
| No, they were riddles and they were cryptic. | |
| They were mysterious. | |
| It just really blows my mind that they always use that terminology for what Q says. | |
| If you are a mainstream media source and you are talking to people about QAnon, and you are trying to convey the shittiness of QAnon to people, you should probably just say, QAnon is a bunch of failed predictions. | |
| Like, boom. | |
| That's it. | |
| That's all you need to tell people. | |
| And you have your soundbite. | |
| But for some reason, they feel this need to give Q more credit than he deserves. | |
| And what was really fucked up was they talked about how a QAnon supporter asked Q, hey Q, can you work tip-top into the State of the Union address? | |
| And then Trump didn't say it. | |
| Then you smash cut to months later when Trump is doing an Easter celebration and he says tip-top at the Easter celebration. | |
| QAnon takes that as a victory. | |
| And again, right there you have the easiest thing. | |
| You have this layup to explain to people how ridiculous QAnon is. | |
| Q was given a task by a follower. | |
| He failed at that task. | |
| Then later on, Trump said the thing that follower wanted him to say, but it was months later. | |
| Q then says, look guys, Trump said a thing months after you asked him to. | |
| And QAnon's like, yay, it's a victory! | |
| And it's like, no, what you say is, this follower asked for this, didn't get it. | |
| Trump said something later that was what they wanted. | |
| But again, months after the fact, QAnon took it as a victory because they're desperate. | |
| They're grasping. | |
| They will do anything to confirm their bias and make themselves look good. | |
| That thing makes them look bad. | |
| But instead, 60 Minutes is like, this happened. | |
| Look at this. | |
| And now, everywhere I go on Telegram, there's all these people who have that clip from 60 Minutes. | |
| They're like, hey 60 Minutes, thanks for helping us pill people! | |
| Hey 60 Minutes, way for spreading the gospel of Q and showing that it's true! | |
| And it's like, oh my god, like, how do you fuck that up? | |
| It's there. | |
| It's a gimme and you blow it. | |
| And it's enraging that they can't get these really basic things right when it comes to reporting on this stuff. | |
| Well, I feel like a lot of these news outlets, they don't really care so much about the truth of the nugget of Q, and really they're just trying to spin it as something sexy. | |
| Like, Q's making headlines now because of his involvement in the insurrection. | |
| We can make some money off this. | |
| They don't actually want to, they don't want to discuss it in the same sort of terms that we do where it's just like, you know, like throwing it to the ground and just kicking it in the ribs because it's stupid and dumb and easily disprovable at every turn. | |
| They need to shine it up and make it seem like sexy and something that they can lead with like, yeah, like QAnon, a cryptic genius with like an army of digital soldier followers. | |
| It was like, it was like back there when they did the, uh, Back in the day when Fox or whatever did that expose on 4chan and like referred to them as hackers on steroids, and then like 4chan went and rallied around that banner. | |
| They wore that as a badge of honor. | |
| They were just like, yeah, we're Anon! | |
| We're hackers on steroids! | |
| They definitely are. | |
| Yeah, and it's just it's really frustrating that like you have to Make this bad guy more than he really is | |
| But what was really terrifying is 60 minutes is building these people up and then they brought on a woman who was | |
| from the Department of Homeland Security | |
| And she was like, oh we had no idea QAnon was gonna be violent like before January 6 QAnon never preached violence | |
| We didn't have any idea about that And it's so ridiculous because the the starting drops are | |
| All of the people you hate are going to be arrested. | |
| They're all going to be sent to Guantanamo. | |
| They're all going to get executed. | |
| The storm, which I talk about in the segment, the storm is all about this and it's always been there. | |
| This is not some random thing they came up with later on in the mythology. | |
| This was always something they preached. | |
| And for this lady who is, like, part of the Trump administration, who worked at DHS, to be like, oh, we had no idea QAnon was going to lead to violent extremism, caught us totally flat-footed and off guard. | |
| I mean, it's like, what the f- were any of you paying attention? | |
| When Trump himself was talking about QAnon, none of you were like, maybe we should look into this and see what the President's, like, covering for. | |
| I mean- He did- so, while I do hate him as kind of a shitty guy, Adam Carolla did coin a term for this that I'm gonna use here, but I do not- it does not mean I condone Adam Carolla, you know, existing. | |
| The Department of Homeland Security person that said that is either stupid or lying. | |
| Like, in either way, it's bad. | |
| It's like a no-win scenario. | |
| Either they knew and they just turned a blind eye to it because, you know, at the end of the day, QAnon are conservatives and Republicans and, you know, gotta give it to our boys, stand back and stand down or whatever. | |
| Or they literally didn't know, which is like, Horrifying. | |
| Like, how could they have not? | |
| I know, and I'm just some random dude. | |
| Right, exactly. | |
| I mean, the stupid or lying question is the only question you can ask here. | |
| It's mind-blowing that this happened. | |
| And then they brought on this other expert guy who was talking about QAnon, and they were like, yeah, QAnon's like a game. | |
| It's interactive. | |
| We've never seen anything like this before. | |
| Because this person has never gone on YouTube and seen all the things about Katy Perry's latest video, Illuminati exposed, or Super Bowl halftime show secret messages. | |
| The quote-unquote like ARG aspect of QAnon has been around for decades in the Illuminati New World Order stuff. | |
| Like the whole idea that People looking for the secret messages in pop culture, in movies, in television, in music. | |
| Backmasking was part of the Satanic Panic. | |
| Finding these things has been a part of this culture for forever. | |
| So to be like, oh, we had no idea how interactive and crazy this is, is again, are you stupid or are you lying? | |
| You can't be an expert that's being interviewed on 60 Minutes and not know this shit. | |
| It's totally irresponsible. | |
| Yeah, like I mean, so you've been interviewed several times as like an expert in this field now, and I feel like for essentially the entire duration of your research into QAnon, if anybody had put a microphone in your face and asked you to go on the record saying whether or not you believe them capable of violent extremism, your answer would be a resounding yes! | |
| They talk about it all the time! | |
| It's like their main thing. | |
| They want their political enemies to be killed. | |
| Like, they want to literally hang Hillary by her neck and shit. | |
| Like, they're just deplorable. | |
| All they talk about is wanting to murder people. | |
| Yeah, like, what's so funny is QAnon will always say, hey, we don't embrace violence. | |
| We condemn violence. | |
| This is their big excuse. | |
| What they always are talking about is that we do not want to kill these people. | |
| What we want is for some external force, some DSX machina, to come in and do the killing for us. | |
| So when we talk about how we're peaceful and we don't want this to happen by our own hands, what we're really saying is we want to outsource the killing. | |
| We want this to happen. | |
| We want Q to do it for us. | |
| We want Trump to do it for us. | |
| And that is a very important part of this. | |
| They've never talked about how, well, Trump's going to win re-election in 2020 and then in 2024 we'll put up Mike Flynn or whoever and he'll win and we'll just keep resolving things through the presidency and the Congress and the courts in a peaceful, civilized way, the way the American public was always intended to. | |
| No, but it was always, Trump's going to release the evidence of our enemies being monsters and then we will kill them. | |
| that's always the payoff for this stuff. Yeah, and I mean, and the only reason that these QAnon | |
| segments are even airing now to begin with is because of the riot at the Capitol, which was | |
| decidedly not a bunch of QAnon supporters being very much hands-off non-violent. So, I mean, | |
| like, it's the proof is in the pudding there, right? | |
| I mean, when it came time for them to kind of put their money where their mouth is and have like a peaceful demonstration at the highest level of government to try to get their message across, instead, they broke into the building and started looting it. | |
| It was just like, oh, okay, well. | |
| Yeah, a bunch of those guys, their legal defense now is, I was acting on what the president told me, and they listened to the president. | |
| Because of Q. I mean, it all comes back to that. | |
| It was the most blatant thing in the world. | |
| Speaking of our glorious former president... | |
| I've heard that there's some Donald Trump and Supreme Court related news that Q's got its sniffer in this week. | |
| You want to explain that for us, Mr. Mike Raines? | |
| So, the Supreme Court said that the Kraken Part 1700, as it were, is once again dead. | |
| They refused to hear the protests against the election in Pennsylvania and the other states. | |
| I didn't really hear anything about this, which means that much like Pirates of the Caribbean 3, they've killed the Kraken offscreen. | |
| Yes, they absolutely have done this. | |
| There was a bunch of protesting and anger on QAnon social media that their heroes, Kavanaugh and ACB, did not grant certorati, or however you say it, for these cases. | |
| Because you need four justices to basically get a case heard. | |
| And when this case got rejected, Alito, Thomas, and Gorsuch filed dissents saying, hey, we wanted to hear this. | |
| I mean, we probably weren't going to rule in favor of it, but we wanted it to go before the court and let them have their day to speak before us. | |
| So it was really telling that Q, who had spent forever during the Kavanaugh hearings being like, Brett Kavanaugh's the lynchpin. | |
| Once we get him in, the Supreme Court is locked, stocked, and loaded for the patriots to start bringing the justice, baby. | |
| And because Q had basically called it quits by the time that ACP got nominated, he really didn't have anything to say about her, but it was obvious that she was just the cherry on top of the sundae of justice that was coming from the Supreme Court. | |
| You sound like a tick. | |
| Spoon! | |
| But basically, you had these two heroes of the movement get on the Supreme Court, appointed by Trump himself, and then the two of them are like, nope, hard pass on the voting thing. | |
| Yeah, you can go fuck yourself, buddy. | |
| So there was a lot of confusion and a lot of anger about their heroes betraying them. | |
| Yeah, I mean, I'm sure that Trump getting to stuff the Supreme Court is gonna bite us in the ass at some point, but, like, in terms of the sailing so far, it's been fairly smooth. | |
| I'm just sort of, like, terrified of when the other shoe is gonna drop, like, when they're just like... | |
| Let's go take another look at Roe v. Wade, and then they're gonna come in with the one-two conservative punch. | |
| Boom, boom! | |
| You're like, your body is our problem now. | |
| So, yeah, I mean, but currently, like, all these big Supreme Court decisions have sort of been going the way of the good guys, right? | |
| Yeah, I mean, down the road, I mean, it'll be very interesting to see, like, what things conservatives think they can get Kavanaugh and ACB to side off on. | |
| I'm sure, like, Roberts is going to be very much in favor of corporate power, and they're going to do their level best on those fronts. | |
| So I mean, the court is not good in any way, shape or form, but the court not being beholden to Trump at the level QAnon and some people thought they might be is a plus. | |
| And on top of the voting These voting lawsuits getting struck down or being denied a hearing. | |
| The Supreme Court also said that now private citizen Trump has to turn over his taxes to the New York Southern District so that they can look at them for evidence of fraud and whatever not will you. | |
| And Trump like whined and pissed and moaned about this in a press release. | |
| But that's a thing that's going to happen now. | |
| He protested the decision in the way someone might if their taxes indicated that they were committing several crimes. | |
| Yeah, it indicated large-scale fraud. | |
| Yeah, I mean, the thing about this is the Roberts Court did Trump about as big a solid as they could while still maintaining the veneer of actually having like a separate branch of the government be the judicial, where they kicked the can of Trump having to give his taxes out down the road past the election. | |
| So they gave Trump the chance to get re-elected without America Or this grand jury seeing his taxes, but then, uh, but they also were like, by the way, you are going to have to show them to somebody at some point, idiot. | |
| So Trump got as good a ruling as he possibly could have on this front. | |
| And now he's losing when he has to lose because the Supreme Court is like, look, man, we tried to sneak you back into the White House for four more years before this shit hit the fan. | |
| Tough break on that front. | |
| But now, now people got to see it because we have to actually pretend that we have a functioning democracy and a working Republic with checks and balances. | |
| Yeah, so Trump lost the title to Biden, and now he was supposed to be, like, getting his due in this, like, other storyline, but now it's like, they're just like, hey, it's already been scripted out, dawg. | |
| Like, this is it for you. | |
| You gotta take a dive. | |
| You have to job here, and then you can march off and be pissed off about it like Vader. | |
| Yes, exactly. | |
| So basically, the one thing that's really funny about all this is QAnon is desperately trying to spin this as a win. | |
| They're trying to spin all of these things as good signs for the movement. | |
| And they've come up with these ideas that like now they've proven that you can impeach a former president. | |
| Now they've proven you can get a former president's tax records. | |
| Now Washington DC is crawling with military. | |
| Can you not see the signs? | |
| Can you not see the trap being sprung? | |
| And it's like, no, all former presidents released tons of tax returns before they took office. | |
| Trump broke that protocol and it was like supposed to be a scandal, but our media like played it down because they love Trump's dumb rallies and the crazy racist stuff he was saying. | |
| And you could always impeach a former president. | |
| That was always a thing that was a part of our system of governance, that you could like say, that guy did a bad thing back in the day, and now we're going to poke him in the eye. | |
| But all these supposed victories that QAnon is talking about, you know what would have been better? | |
| Just Trump winning re-election. | |
| I'm just going to put this out there every time QAnon's like, hey, this is a thing that's working out for us. | |
| It's like, well, no, actually it's not. | |
| Your boy lost. | |
| Your boy lost the big one, and you trying to wrap your head around how that's not a bad thing is hilarious and also stupid. | |
| Yeah. | |
| Shawn Michaels totally got him to tap out immediately. | |
| Like, let's not question it anymore. | |
| Donald Trump gets to be furious at Vince McMahon forever. | |
| Yes. | |
| Yes. | |
| The Washington screwdrop. | |
| The Wisconsin screwdrop. | |
| Oh, man. | |
| It's so great. | |
| That'd be awesome. | |
| One of the greatest stories in wrestling history. | |
| It's just so good. | |
| Yeah. | |
| So juicy. | |
| Now all I can think of is Joe Biden as Shawn Michaels sharpshooting Bret Hart. | |
| And I don't know who the Earl Hefner, I don't know who the evil referee is. | |
| It's gotta be John Roberts. | |
| It's John Roberts as Earl Hefner, demanding the bell to be rung. | |
| And Vince McMahon is outside the ring being played by George Soros, yelling at John Roberts to ring the bell. | |
| So I think we can have someone make art for us of this. | |
| Yeah, for those of you listening at home, if you have no idea what the fuck this is referencing, even if you don't give a shit about wrestling, like I don't give a shit about wrestling, you should look into this story. | |
| It's just a high-quality story about business politics in a field where you wouldn't expect it. | |
| In this case, the WWF. | |
| Well, not the WWE, formerly the WWF. | |
| Yeah, this is an actual, real weird thing that happened many years ago that was... I think that people are talking about to this day, when it comes to like... What is it? | |
| It's like the such-and-such screwjob? | |
| The Montreal screwjob. | |
| Go ahead and Google that shit, folks. | |
| Yeah, there are documentaries about it. | |
| Oh, it's great. | |
| Yeah, it's great. | |
| It's like the Kings of Kong. | |
| You never think that Donkey Kong would be compelling, and then you watch that, and it is incredibly compelling! | |
| So, I mean, hashtag Team Weeby. | |
| Oh yeah, I mean, say it again. | |
| It's Weeby. | |
| The folks listening at home might be wondering why we've wandered off talking about Q at all, and that's because, well, I hate to break it to you guys, Q doesn't exist, and QAnon is a lie, at least according to Tucker Carlson, who can't seem to find Q on the internet. | |
| He looked real hard. | |
| He looked real hard. | |
| Yeah, so Tucker Carlson's crack team of researchers went searching on the internet all day before his show to look for Q and they couldn't find it. | |
| It doesn't exist. | |
| This is this winking, nodding nonsense to the people that support this stuff that like, hey guys, Uh, QAnon is actually a boogeyman from the left to make the right look bad because it's not really real. | |
| It's all just silly nonsense. | |
| Those lies your friend keeps posting on Facebook? | |
| That's all a conspiracy to make conservatives look dumb. | |
| Yeah, I mean, oh man, can we get Tucker Carlson out there banging on the drum for us, trying to convince people that all QAnon followers are secretly Antifa-like plans? | |
| Like, not just the ones at the Capitol riot, all of them. | |
| QAnon is bullshit, and anyone that says that they preach Q is secretly a Deep State operative, high off of their face on Adrenochrome. | |
| Yeah. | |
| Yeah, and the best part about all of it, I mean, that's kind of inevitably where the right wing will go with this, and I don't think QAnon sees that. | |
| Like, QAnon being like, hey, anyone who claimed they were QAnon that were inside the Capitol building, they weren't really QAnon, they were Antifa. | |
| Guess what, guys? | |
| That's going to just snowball back on you, and eventually all of the right wing is going to be like, guess what? | |
| QAnon is Antifa. | |
| They're just going to keep no-true-Scotsman-ing this shit until all of you are the bad guys, according to them. | |
| It's gonna be a big-time Scoob and the Gang mask-off reveal. | |
| Right. | |
| Like, let's see who you really wear the whole time. | |
| Pulls mask of QAnon off. | |
| Antifa! | |
| Yeah, exactly. | |
| This is exactly what's going to happen. | |
| And my favorite part of this whole Tucker Carlson, I was looking for QAnon and I couldn't find it bullshit, is Q in two different QDrops links to Tucker Carlson directly. | |
| QDrop 2123 has a link to Tucker Carlson whining about diversity and being like, really? | |
| Is diversity good for us? | |
| Or maybe we should have like one common culture. | |
| Wouldn't it be better if we just ensured the purity of the white race? | |
| Tucker Carlson took 88 words to express what he could have in 14. | |
| So, I mean, it is this long anti-multiculturalism screed. | |
| Tucker Carlson took 88 words to express what he could have in 14. | |
| So, I mean, it is this long anti-multiculturalism screed. | |
| And then he has another QDROP 4454. | |
| It's an article by Tucker where it talks about how we're being lied to about coronavirus and the lockdowns prove it. | |
| So, Tucker himself is part of the QAnon mythos as a good guy. | |
| The QAnon drop links to an article from Tucker Carlson entitled, What's Up With Jews? | |
| Because Tucker Carlson is a fucking monster. | |
| Yeah, him and Bill Maher. | |
| If anyone could just throw them both off a cliff. | |
| Oh, that was one of my favorite things. | |
| I had this happen to me at my work a few days ago when a bunch of players were complaining about masks being bullshit. | |
| They were like, ultra-liberal Bill Maher says masks are bullshit. | |
| Can you believe it? | |
| And I'm like, yes, the champion of the liberal cause, Bill Maher. | |
| Right, nailed it. | |
| You have found our leader, and you have found our leader speaking truth to you. | |
| Congratulations, person who is just... I just... Also, those old people are super wrong. | |
| Mask rules. | |
| They're crusaders that are fighting crime over time. | |
| Yes. | |
| Yeah. | |
| They're on that overtime fighting crime. | |
| Fighting crime! | |
| And that one guy had that mask with holograms on it and he made that thing that was unbreakable look like food for those giant caterpillars and they ate it and it destroyed the thing and he saved the day. | |
| I love how some of those vehicles were like genuine kind of transformations like right like you know your motorcycle gets like a propeller that pops out of the back of it and it's like okay now it's sort of like a ghetto helicopter. | |
| The cars turning into jets a lot of the times are just their doors opening and some rockets coming out of the back which was pretty funny but my favorite one will always be there was like a truck or something that quote-unquote transformed into a boat by which I mean it shot a boat out of it like I had that toy it was literally just like a boat spring-loaded into the shell of a truck and you would like hit a button and it would like rocket this boat out of it it was like whoa what a transformation It'll transform by just spitting this smaller vehicle out of the larger vehicle. | |
| Yeah, it's like when you eat a Gusher and it transforms from the solid outside to the liquid inside. | |
| Yes. | |
| It's a wild transformation. | |
| That's right, I worked a Gushers reference into my mask. | |
| Man, I told you I was not being obscure enough earlier and you're like, oh. | |
| Just wait. | |
| I mean, masks might be a little bit obscure, but I think people still... No, that's what I'm saying. | |
| You went obscure. | |
| Yeah, well, I threatened to start talking about sectars on Twitter, but I honestly just don't know enough about sectars to really talk about it. | |
| There's not a lot of sectars to talk about. | |
| I mean, I remember having a sectars book when I was a kid and being like, man, this is pretty cool, but that's about the extent of my sectars knowledge. | |
| It was like, oh, they look just like me, but they've got big dumb bug eyes and like little antennas. | |
| Anyway, so Tucker Carlson is an idiot. | |
| My show notes here have something written down called Operation Lockstep and a question I was asking while writing it, which is, what the fuck is Operation Lockstep? | |
| Mike, what the fuck is Operation Lockstep? | |
| Okay, so Lin Wood decided to jump into the Operation Lockstep bullshit, which QAnon then aggressively celebrated and worshipped, even though Alex Jones, their mortal enemy, wink wink wink, is a huge Operation Lockstep screecher, and Alex Jones is bad. | |
| But Operation Lockstep is this nonsense that has been around for about like a decade or so about the idea that the government is going to release this bioweapon and then they're going to take control of our governments and basically force us into a dictatorial hellscape. | |
| And they put these documents out there to admit this is their secret plan! | |
| And the President of Ghana even grabbed a copy of it and read it to his citizens as a warning for what's coming and what coronavirus actually is. | |
| And the audio of the alleged President of Ghana reading the Operation Lockstep Manifesto is bullshit. | |
| It's not true. | |
| It's not the President of Ghana. | |
| And the other thing about Operation Lockstep is that it is not like the Trilateral Commission or the Bilderberg Group or the Rothschilds' overt plan to enslave us all and to put us under their yoke. | |
| Operation Lockstep was just one of a series of scenarios That the Rockefeller Group had created as what would happen if there was like this devastating cataclysmic event? | |
| How would society react to that big event? | |
| And what are the possible outcomes? | |
| Operation Lockstep is basically everyone becomes hyper-nationalistic. | |
| Governments start overreaching to restrict the rights of their citizens. | |
| And it's just one of four scenarios. | |
| get away with in the name of public health. | |
| And like being like, well, we have to lock this down because of the | |
| virus and whatnot, will you? | |
| And it's just one of four scenarios. | |
| The other three scenarios are called clever together, hack attack and smart | |
| scramble, and those are the non dystopian like hell world options. | |
| Like, Clever Together is society at large, like, kind of working together to make this work. | |
| And Hack Attack is basically, like, just that. | |
| It's about, like, people now going into, like, cyber warfare and all that kind of stuff. | |
| So these are just like gaming things out like it's like a war game that you hear about like the U.S. | |
| military doing like a hypothetical invasion of Iraq. | |
| What would happen then? | |
| And you game out like what that hypothetical invasion would be. | |
| And then you play it out, and then you see if you think that's reasonable or not, and what would you do to counteract it? | |
| Each of these things have little timelines on them. | |
| Like in Lockstep, it starts with a quarantine restricting in-person contact. | |
| Intercontinental trade hit by strict pathogen controls. | |
| Italy addresses immigrant caregiver gap with robots. | |
| Vietnam requiring a solar panel in every home and then at the end of lockstep it says African leaders fear repeat of Nigeria's 2026 government collapse because again that's like what they kind of feared would happen is that these governments would overreach and that the citizenry would rebel and there'd be revolutions against the lockstep governments. | |
| I'm not gonna lie, those were not the type of predictions I was expecting. | |
| Like, Vietnam requires all people have a solar panel? | |
| Like, oh no, the government trying to get solar panels installed on houses, those monsters. | |
| Yeah, exactly. | |
| Free solar energy, those animals! | |
| Yes! | |
| Behold the government tyranny of renewable energy! | |
| Will someone think of the children? | |
| Yes. | |
| Yeah, but what are they going to do when their precious solar panels freeze over? | |
| Yeah, exactly, exactly. | |
| So in Clever Together, in 2011, the global economy turns the corner. | |
| 2015, radical U.S. | |
| and China emission targets signal new era in climate change negotiations. | |
| Uh, 2025, Transparent International reports 10th consecutive year of improved governance. | |
| And finally, Consortium of Foundations launches third green revolution as food shortages loom. | |
| So like, like these things all have like timelines where they come up with ideas for what would happen and how it would all work out. | |
| And, um, It's not anything real. | |
| It's not the secret plan of the Rockefellers to enslave us all. | |
| You mean it's not the Cabal playbook? | |
| It's not the Cabal playbook. | |
| It's actually... Cabal playbook for year-ending 2022 Operation Lockstep. | |
| Right, exactly. | |
| Classified. | |
| Do not give to President of Ghana. | |
| Yes, exactly! | |
| He'll blow the whistle on us if you let him see it. | |
| Hack Attack actually sounds terrifying. | |
| It ends with India-Pakistan water war rages, and then finally, warlords dispense vital medicines to Southeast Asia communities. | |
| So like, Hack Attack, oh my god, everything goes to hell there. | |
| Well, I mean, at the end of the warlords seem to learn a valuable lesson about governance. | |
| Yeah, much like the Yakuza providing aid to the people when the tsunami hit. | |
| Yeah, hack attack colon warlords are the new Yakuza. | |
| Yes. | |
| And, uh... | |
| And, uh... | |
| Yeah. | |
| So, I mean, so, like, how long has Q been about this Operation Lockstep life? | |
| Is this like a new... Because we've discussed several times previously that QAnon is just sort of this... Q, I don't think, has ever talked about Lockstep themselves directly. | |
| This is more of a right-wing paranoia thing. | |
| This is part of like... | |
| Agenda 23 or Agenda 21, whatever it is that's the alleged thing that the UN is going to do to destroy us all. | |
| This is like just like the kind of stuff that's been around for forever that permeates the zeitgeist and every now and then some QAnon promoters like, hey, look at this thing. | |
| This is scary. | |
| I mean it's like kind of like how they hopped on to this March 4th is when Trump gets back in the office thing because they're always looking for like the next like excuse the next pathway forward and the March 4th stuff is like sovereign citizen bullshit like QAnon never talked about that ever until they needed an out they needed a new goalpost shift I'm about to blow your mind here, Mike. | |
| Ready? | |
| Are you ready to have your mind blown? | |
| Especially because now that you've been pilled, you'll be more receptive to this. | |
| Excellent! | |
| Alright, ready? | |
| That date you just mentioned, March 4th, could also be intoned as March 4th, as in to move forward in lockstep. | |
| Operation Lockstep! | |
| Oh my lord! | |
| Boys! | |
| There we go! | |
| That's right, it's your boy Al, number one Q decipherer. | |
| Those riddles are no match for me. | |
| Holler at me 60 minutes. | |
| I got the decoder ring. | |
| L, the master baker, truly, truly the greatest of all of them. | |
| I don't even know what to do. | |
| Yeah, the scales have fallen from my eyes. | |
| QAnon could never kill me, but L has. | |
| This is a revelation. | |
| The call is coming from inside my house this whole time. | |
| My beautiful babies, never let any of your conservative friends hear that segment of the podcast or else their heads will explode like scanners. | |
| Well, I don't think we're going to get any more juice out of that Operation Lockstep than that one. | |
| Before we go out of our cues in the news segment, I believe Sarge has some more information about the forthcoming movie from Ben Shapiro's Dry Wife Studios. | |
| Do you want to tell us a little bit about that? | |
| You can find it. | |
| It's out now. | |
| It's called Run Hide Fight is the school shooting movie that Ben Shapiro's Daily Wire Productions acquired. | |
| It's out now. | |
| It is about a girl whose name I don't remember. | |
| It's not important. | |
| She has been trained by... Liberty America! | |
| Yeah, Liberty Fourth of July America Bald Eagle. | |
| I believe her name is Chastity White. | |
| It's, oh, what's the gun girl that works for InfoWars? | |
| It doesn't matter. | |
| It doesn't matter. | |
| She has been trained by her father to hunt and go around and be an awesome American. | |
| And so when five other children invade her high school, led by one bad guy, they're Hans Gruber. | |
| He's just a dumb teen. | |
| He doesn't Like, accomplish anything. | |
| He has found the other misfits at the school. | |
| One, like, disenfranchised jock. | |
| And he walks into the school and he's set his bombs around. | |
| He walks in, he goes, trigger warning, and then he shoots somebody. | |
| And it's, it only gets better from there. | |
| And this school shooting, this purported school shooting goes on for The whole length of the movie, I think it's in mostly real time, so it's like over an hour, which is not how school shootings work. | |
| It's like a siege. | |
| It's like, you know, it's like one of those old action movies from, you know, not just Die Hard, but remember when Die Hard spun off a bunch of, like, just immediate, like, imitators, and it kind of ran through into the 90s. | |
| I mean, what is speed if not just Die Hard on a bus? | |
| Am I right? | |
| So like, but this is like Die Hard, but also Columbine. | |
| Yeah, it's Columbine, Die Hard. | |
| And so did you actually watch this thing? | |
| Did you watch this soup to nuts? | |
| I know I watched a breakdown of it. | |
| So I've seen a bunch of I've seen all the pertinent clips. | |
| I mean, how could you know what's pertinent if you don't watch the whole thing yourself? | |
| You can be missing out on vital context. | |
| We need to do a Twitch stream of this movie at some point or something. | |
| Run Hide Fight? | |
| Yes. | |
| It's... | |
| It's both gross and, like, suspenseful. | |
| Like, there are definitely worse movies out there, but the dad, like, gets inside and, like, he's a trained sniper. | |
| So when one of the school teachers- Man, conservatives fucking love the idea of a sniper, man. | |
| Oh, yeah. | |
| Their dick gets so hard over the idea of murdering someone from a long distance without them even seeing you. | |
| They're just like, oh, that brown person is totally dead and they don't even know it. | |
| Um, yeah, he, the dad gets close enough to the school that he snipes one of the school shooters, and he's not immediately arrested. | |
| Like, they take him into custody, but he shot a bad guy with a gun, and he was a good guy with a gun, and the cops let him get close enough, so he gets to just- Are civilians allowed to just own sniper rifles? | |
| Yeah. | |
| You can own almost any gun. | |
| Illegal guns are very rare. | |
| I mean, I don't know shit about gun ownership because I don't really feel the need to fucking own a gun for any reason. | |
| I need the sniper rifle for self-defense or whatever. | |
| Or I need to be able to when I hunt a deer I like to be able to kill a deer at like 1,400 yards | |
| I Really want the thing to be dead for a while by the time I | |
| get to it where I could start butchering it Yeah. | |
| I want to have to walk like 30 minutes to get to that deer and see that it's already being picked clean by vultures and other scavenging animals. | |
| Yeah, you don't want to spook the deer because it makes the meat taste bad. | |
| You know, it makes the meat taste great. | |
| 45 minutes of it resting to room temperature on the floor of the forest you killed it at while like a couple of squirrels pick at its wounds. | |
| It's like, mmm, delicious. | |
| Yeah, I don't know. | |
| No, it's truly an amazing movie. | |
| 38 minutes in, she gets out of the school. | |
| She escapes. | |
| She both runs, hides, and fights, and gets out. | |
| But then, she goes back in. | |
| Cops don't immediately grab her. | |
| She goes back in. | |
| She just had to leave the school for a little while to get more guns. | |
| So that she could go back in and be more hero. | |
| She goes back in to save everyone else. | |
| She convinces one of the school shooters to join her side because he was just a doughy nerd who main school shooter kid convinced to join and he immediately gets shot. | |
| She has a black love interest and he gets shot so they're very woke. | |
| Um, this white girl has a black love interest, so Ben Shapiro's not racist. | |
| Oh yeah. | |
| Just so you know. | |
| But is it the only black character in the movie? | |
| Yeah, and he dies. | |
| He gets shot and killed? | |
| Excellent. | |
| Well done. | |
| At least they gave him lines. | |
| I appreciate that much. | |
| Way to go for representation, Ben Shapiro. | |
| Oh my god. | |
| I'm gonna make our listeners cyber bully you into watching this full movie. | |
| Oh, you don't even have to cyberbully me to watch it. | |
| I will watch the full movie. | |
| That will absolutely happen. | |
| I think it's only available on Ben Shapiro's fuckin' site. | |
| That's right, cut him off a slice! | |
| So that made your MFing money. | |
| You know, that triggered line, like the tone deafness of it, reminded me of, remember that movie Bright? | |
| that came out. | |
| And it had that fairy lives don't matter today line delivered with no irony by Will Smith. | |
| That shit was bananas. | |
| So normal human racism still existed in that fantasy world. | |
| Yeah, even though orcs were the new black people, they just like, or the new like, you know, | |
| Spanish immigrants in California, like whatever analog they wanted to be. | |
| It's like traditional racism still existed. | |
| And on top of this, this specious racism that permeates it. | |
| You know what that all sounds like, and that all reminds me of is. | |
| A perfect segue to this week's surprise segment, Alien Nation Nation, the inaugural. | |
| It's happening. | |
| Here it goes. | |
| Y'all motherfuckers thought I was playing. | |
| No, it's happening right now. | |
| It's Alien Nation Nation. | |
| Of course, can't Talk about the Alien Nation franchise. | |
| It spans, like, a ton of media at this point. | |
| I mean, you've got the movies, and the TV shows, and the books, and I think maybe some comics in there, but it all started with the 1988 seminal release of Alien Nation. | |
| It dropped... This is before Batman 89, folks. | |
| It was the Wild West of cinema. | |
| Real quick in Alien Nation Nation, when was the most recent Alien Nation anything released? | |
| Ooh, I don't actually know off the top of my head. | |
| If you give me a second, I'll do a little alienation research while I give you some of the quick facts about this incredible movie. | |
| I mean, first of all, you recognize the names of some of the people in this movie, even though you've never seen it. | |
| James Caan? | |
| Mandy Patinkin, Terrence Stamp. | |
| Those are all actors that people know, right? | |
| Their shit is crazy. | |
| And for a movie that not a lot of people have heard of at this day and age, according to the Wikipedia, it was met with, quote, mixed critical reviews. | |
| I mean, hey, who doesn't like mixed? | |
| I mean, that's how I like my milkshakes. | |
| Otherwise, it's just milk and ice cream. | |
| What the fuck is that? | |
| Also, it made $32 million. | |
| I don't see a budget list right here, but $32 million, quote, moderate financial success. | |
| Hey! | |
| It did okay! | |
| It was a moderate success with mixed critical reviews, so what are you going to do about it? | |
| But it did end up spawning this big fucking media franchise. | |
| Every time I try to go to the Wikipedia for the Alienation whole sheboingo, it keeps redirecting me to Alienation, either just the movie or just the TV show. | |
| So I'll have to get back to you on some of that. | |
| What was the most recent Alienation shit? | |
| But I did show up with some fun facts. | |
| We talked about some of the fun facts before on the previous one. | |
| So, the reason this reminds me of Bright is because it's the far-off year. | |
| The movie came out in 1988, it reminded me. | |
| The far-off year of 1991. | |
| That's right. | |
| Their big swing was three years in their future. | |
| It's 1991. | |
| Three years after aliens showed up in the desert and settled in Los Angeles and just tried to integrate with regular human society. | |
| And for the most part, these aliens are just like us, except for their bald spotted heads. | |
| But they do have some quirky bullshit about them. | |
| For instance, they get fucked up on sour milk. | |
| I'm pretty sure I brought up that fact the last time I was talking about Alienation. | |
| I forgot to mention, Saltwater burns them like acid. | |
| I remember this. | |
| They hate Sid. | |
| They can't stand it. | |
| In fact, the end of the movie dramatically ends with, it's a buddy cop movie about a human cop and an alien cop having to solve some business. | |
| And it dramatically ends with our alien buddy in a boat. | |
| On the saltwater ocean! | |
| It's like that scene in Dante's Peak! | |
| At any moment, if he got out of the boat, his legs would disintegrate into nothing! | |
| He would be ruined! | |
| That whole man's life would be ruined. | |
| Yeah, so Alienation is a thing. | |
| I actually, I did not go back and actually re-watch this movie, but I kind of think I might for some future Alienation Nation episodes. | |
| But mostly, this was just an exercise in me telling y'all You motherfucker! | |
| Your boy's not playing around! | |
| If I say I'm going to bring up a segment called Alienation Nation, there's a chance it's going to happen. | |
| Anything can happen on the Adventures of Hellworld podcast. | |
| You're definitely challenging me to make my podcast within a podcast cat's lair, where I talk about thundercats. | |
| And honestly, I think somebody on Twitter did try to harangue Mike Rains into doing another Babylon 5-5. | |
| That is one of our listener questions. | |
| I have been asked for another Babylon 5-5, yes. | |
| Oh, it's convenient because I believe that after our new segment, if I'm looking right, let me check my notes real quick. | |
| Let me type on a loud mechanical keyboard. | |
| Clackety clackety clack. | |
| Oh, I think it's time. | |
| I think it's time to investigate our swollen mailbag. | |
| That sounds right by me. | |
| And we might as well just get into this with Red O Panda saying, can Mike treat us to another Babylon 5-5 this episode? | |
| The answer's no, because I sidetracked it with fucking alien- This is an Alienation Nation podcast. | |
| You're gonna have to wait for the Babylon 5-5. | |
| The Babylon 5-5 is next week, and then Thundercat Slayer is the week after that. | |
| You can't let them know ahead of time. | |
| If you let them know ahead of time, the enthusiasts will just skip to the episodes they want to hear. | |
| If we're going to keep reaching our niche audience of classic sci-fi enthusiasts, they have to listen to every episode in the hope that this one is going to be the next one where they talk about alien nature. | |
| Where this will be the one where they talk about quantum leap! | |
| That's right, quantum leap! | |
| Oh shit, get ready for some slide into sliders. | |
| Our podcast with a podcast all about sliders. | |
| Where we talk about both sandwiches and the Sci-Fi Channel original show sliders. | |
| Yeah, that one. | |
| We eat sliders while discussing sliders. | |
| It's gonna be a real treat for your ear holes. | |
| Oh my god, that's the greatest thing I've ever heard in my life. | |
| Don't worry, folks. | |
| For those of you that prefer fantasy to sci-fi, get ready for the Beastcaster podcast. | |
| It's going to be our tight five minutes about the Beastmaster movies, and I'm going to talk about how cute those ferrets were. | |
| So get ready for our slate of random bullshit podcasts within podcasts. | |
| Babylon 5, Alien Nation Nation, Slide into Sliders, Cat's Lair, and Beastcaster. | |
| And, you know, submit some of your own. | |
| Yes. | |
| And you've got the touch, my Transformers podcast. | |
| So yes, any dumb segments you want to type 5 on, feel free to offer them up to us, and I will then make it a benefit of the $5 Patreon subscribers that for $5 you'll get a type 5. | |
| Whatever the devil you want, we will just go off the rails and talk about it. | |
| That's right guys, give us your money, throw your money in the bucket for 3 Guys Talk Guyver, our 5 minute podcast inside a podcast all about the Guyver series. | |
| Wow. | |
| Are we gonna talk about the live-action movie featuring Mark Hamill? | |
| Yeah, I mean, Mark Hamill's in it. | |
| How the fuck can we not talk about it? | |
| Also, Guyver 2 has one of the coolest superhero transformation sequences ever. | |
| Homeboy, like, pulls up onto a cliff on a motorcycle, just jumps off of it, and Midair just goes, Guyver! | |
| And that shit, like, shoots out of his back and wraps him up real good. | |
| It was, like, some classic Power... That shit was Power Rangers for adults. | |
| Yeah. | |
| I remember watching that shit on SyFy and just being like, man, Power Rangers ain't got shit on the Guyver. | |
| The second movie falls off a cliff, and then we get into the anime. | |
| Well, he jumps off a cliff. | |
| I just said that the second movie literally jumps off of a cliff. | |
| Waka waka. | |
| Anyway, thanks for your question, person who wants more Babylon 5-5. | |
| We'll see what we can do in future episodes. | |
| Which future episodes? | |
| You're just going to have to listen and find out. | |
| Yep, exactly. | |
| So one of our great Inquisitors, Chairman Walkman, asks, at what point do conspiracy theories become destructive? | |
| I think it's when they encourage like damaging and negative behavior and also obsession. | |
| I think when you just get... and the thing is you can't dictate which conspiracy theories will do that because like you could get obsessed with the moon landing and then the next thing you know you want to blow up NASA to prove they're lying or something. | |
| So I don't know that there is like such a thing as like a quote-unquote harmless conspiracy theory on some level because people are stupid and they can take anything and turn it into a destructive and bad thing down the line but uh for the most part I think like if you're looking for Bigfoot or the Loch Ness Monster or Flat Earth or that kind of stuff like in general you're probably not going to go down a dark path but like Once you get into the whole thing where the government is run by pedophiles who drink the blood of children, that's a conspiracy theory that's probably going to lead to some bullshit. | |
| That's a conspiracy theory that's probably not going to end well for most people. | |
| I think a lot of it has to do with the point at which your conspiracy beliefs begin to isolate you from your friends, family, and fellow man. | |
| Uh, right? | |
| Because, like, you can believe something crazy and easily disprovable and not have it fuck up your whole life, right? | |
| Like, if you believe in the Loch Ness Monster, you're just like, yo, in this lake there's this giant dinosaur, and it has survived here somehow, and don't worry about it, and no amount of evidence will prove to me that those photos were not the actual real deal. | |
| But that's probably not going to isolate you from your friends and family. | |
| You'll be like the kooky uncle that believes in the Loch Ness Monster, but no amount of that is probably going to cause your family to disintegrate around you. | |
| Damaging conspiracy theories do typically turn you into an island, sort of by necessity, right? | |
| Because once you feel isolated, you're more inclined to find other people that share the thing that's isolating you, and then you become your own community, and bingo bango, you've got your Jamestown or whatever, you know what I mean? | |
| Jonestown. | |
| What did I say? | |
| Jamestown? | |
| Yeah. | |
| I mean, you don't know that Jamestown didn't have a cult in it? | |
| Yeah, Jonestown. | |
| Personally, I think a little bit of the secret sauce is the element of isolation that dangerous conspiracy theories tend to lead to. | |
| Uh, for me, I think it's when you stop thinking critically about what you're looking at, because I'll let you in on a secret. | |
| Old Sarge loves cryptids and stories about aliens, but I also keep thinking about them critically. | |
| And if you do that and... | |
| You tend to stay safe. | |
| If you can keep thinking critically about something, you are usually on the safe side of it. | |
| Yeah, like, who wouldn't want, like, Big Man or Mothman or any of that shit to be real, right? | |
| I mean, like, it would be cool, like, belief in that stuff just sort of, like, allows you to trick yourself into having a little bit of the element of, like, the fun unknown left in your life. | |
| Where it's just like, maybe there is a Bigfoot. | |
| Like, you can't tell me for sure that there's not a Bigfoot. | |
| A lot of people seem to think there is a Bigfoot. | |
| So, like, you know, in the reality I'm building for myself, there's a chance that there's some sort of majestic forest ape in Washington State just hanging out. | |
| And that's cool. | |
| But, you know, like, it becomes more dangerous when you stop adding, like, couching it in that sort of, like, thin veneer of rational thought, when you're just, like, grabbing people by their collar and shouting in their face, like, Joe Pine has a weather machine! | |
| I know! | |
| The snow, it burns weird! | |
| Like, it's fucking, this is the truth! | |
| And you just can't get pulled down off of that ledge, no matter how much fact is put into your face. | |
| Yeah I think that's one of the big things is that when you start like confronting people about your beliefs and you won't take no for an answer and you're like angry and militant about this stuff like the vaccines are a microchip that will attract you or kill you or yeah they're using weather to disrupt our lives and to try to enslave us. | |
| Once you go down that path where you're telling people that I know the secret truth and you need to know it and believe it too That's when you can start like alienating your friends and family where like they're just like like whatever dude like let bygones be bygones let's go along to get along and that's like the dangerous part about QAnon is the whole Great Awakening the whole thing that we gotta pill people | |
| Like, the fact that it's so important to QAnon supporters to bring you into the fold, to get you to commit. | |
| I've heard so many people talk about, well, this woman left her husband because he was a QAnon believer. | |
| Why couldn't he just, like, let that shit go? | |
| And it's because the movement tells you you gotta pill him. | |
| You gotta get your wife to be involved. | |
| You gotta get your kids to believe. | |
| So, the aggressive proselytizing that is part of QAnon's core beliefs leads it down a path where it makes it so you're you are likely to get ostracized you are likely to offend and alienate people and that and the fact that also like you're gonna be just raving mad about literally everything you see in the media and television just the government's bad music's bad television's bad movies are bad everything's bad like | |
| It's hard to be a part of society when someone's like, hey, did you see the new Marvel movie? | |
| And then you start screaming, Robert Downey Jr. | |
| drinks the blood of children! | |
| It's like, OK, great, wonderful. | |
| But why did we invite Bob to this party again? | |
| I mean, no cults are great, aside from the ones that are the bad guys in our media. | |
| You know, like the crazy ones in Temple of Doom. | |
| Which is why I'm happy to introduce the Kali Modcast. | |
| That's right, Kali Modcast. | |
| It's a podcast within a podcast where we're discussing Temple of Doom. | |
| I mean, of course you fucking saw it coming. | |
| You're behind the curtain with me, buddy. | |
| I mean, it wasn't a dig. | |
| We're pulling levers and twisting knobs together back here, sir. | |
| It wasn't a dig. | |
| I saw it coming and I loved it. | |
| I watched the minecart in that mine steer onto the track that was the Kali Modcast. | |
| No time for love, Dr. Jones. | |
| So, as his second and later question is, what is your favorite Magic the Gathering deck? | |
| Oh, that's a hard question. | |
| I mean, like, currently or ever? | |
| Let's just assume that the question is ever because that is easier to answer without boring people to tears. | |
| I guess, like, I always have, like, a weird soft spot in my heart for the Firemane Angel control deck that I played when that was legal and standard back in the day. | |
| You know, Zur's Weirding is just a fucked up magic card that is one of those things that would never do anything aside, nothing, or just squeezing all of the fun out of your opponent. | |
| I had a quite good deck that squeezed a lot of fun out of my opponent at the time, and I beat many an ass at FNM with Fire Maiden Angel Control. | |
| I was a dirty combo player, so I'll always have a soft spot in my heart for Splinter Twin. | |
| And that just broke a format for a long time. | |
| I would say that the deck I played the most was Variants of Drago. | |
| At one point, I was the guy in my community that ran black for a few Diabolic Edicts and some Lobotomies in my deck, and that was my little variant of it. | |
| But I think my most fun favorite deck was Prostblooms. | |
| I'm a combo scum like Sarge, and I loved just drawing my whole deck into my hand and just hitting you with a Drain Life for like 50. | |
| That was just the bee's knees and the cat's pajamas. | |
| Yeah, I mean, I did, back when Extended was a format or whatever, I did play Hercule Ball, I feel like. | |
| Was that Extended? | |
| Whenever I got to play Hercule Ball, I definitely played Hercule Ball, and Hercule Ball was pretty fun. | |
| Yeah, there's a lot of great magic decks out there. | |
| I think, secretly, the best deck, or my favorite deck ever, was a draft deck I did during Triple Odyssey block that had, like, it was just green, red, all the best uncommons, Roar of the Worm, Beast Attack. | |
| Shower of coals, like a full place at a wild mongrel. | |
| That deck was just... I've never more easily beaten anyone's ass in a draft in my life than that 3-0. | |
| It was just absolutely bananas. | |
| A 4x Wild Mongrel's an auto-win in a draft. | |
| Jesus Christ, that deck is out of control. | |
| That's so good. | |
| Anyway, thanks for the question, bud. | |
| I love talking magic. | |
| Yes. | |
| Our podcast, we're doing a podcast about magic, exactly. | |
| And finally, TrapLordFlecko asks, why are so many people obsessed with making QAnon in some way Russia's fault? | |
| And I think this really comes down to the fact that people want a big bad guy to be on the other side of this thing. | |
| It just can't be that a troll on 4chan got hot. | |
| Like, it's just unacceptable that that's the origin story of this dumb mythos that we're dealing with now that led to people, like, attacking the Capitol building and very nearly killing Mitt Romney and slightly less nearly but still pretty nearly killing many Congress people, the Vice President, Senators. | |
| I mean, it's just one of these things where If you don't know Chan culture, you don't know about FBI Anon, CIA Anon, Highway Patrol Anon, all these people that were doing the exact same shit that Q was doing and just gave up because it was boring to them or it wasn't getting traction. | |
| It was kind of inevitable that some dipshit was going to take the Illuminati story, add Donald Trump to it, and then make a stew that got people interested and hyped. | |
| And Is Russia amplifying this stuff? | |
| Absolutely. | |
| I mean, there are bot networks that do this kind of stuff. | |
| Yeah, I feel like the suggestion that Russia is behind Q is putting the cart before the horse. | |
| Q existed, and if Russia's got its fingers in it now, it's because Q is like, Obviously dangerous to our country and foreign agents would seize upon such a weakness and try to do their thing with it But they're like it's it's not like it's like Putin is out there like posting q-drops. | |
| You know what I mean? | |
| Right exactly. | |
| I mean this is uh It was really funny because I saw a thing earlier today where like Fox News had a headline that was like Khrushchev ordered Oswald to kill Kennedy and it's like this is kind of the same thing that it comes down to this kind of conspiracy theory is that Do you want this legendary president in our history, this like young handsome guy with a smoking wife who was charismatic and funny and witty, do you want him to get killed, be killed by some minimum wage working moron at a building who didn't even go out of his way to shoot the president? | |
| The president happened to be driving by his workplace that day and he's like, well the president's gonna drive by my workplace, might as well shoot him, who knows? | |
| Or instead, was JFK murdered by literally everybody? | |
| Like, every rich and powerful person on Earth had a hit team in Daily Plaza to kill this guy. | |
| They sure did. | |
| Right, exactly. | |
| So it's like, who do you want to blame for the worst crime ever? | |
| Do you want to blame the Jamoak or the shadowy Cabal? | |
| So, by the same token, it's like, no, Q couldn't be disrupting American society as a 4chan prank gone horribly wrong. | |
| It had to be the evil Russians, like, diabolically manipulating us with their evil Russianhood. | |
| And that's not the case. | |
| We've read the early drops aloud here. | |
| And, like, if you were a state-sponsored, like, official that was trying to do this shit, you would have message discipline. | |
| You would have, like, an agenda. | |
| You would be concise. | |
| You'd have talking points. | |
| You wouldn't have a deadline that you were going to brutally miss, like, three days after you started posting. | |
| And Q's all over the map early on. | |
| He's like, uh, not a lot of people are corrupt. | |
| Wait a minute, 70% of all people in Congress are corrupt. | |
| It's not Republicans versus Democrats. | |
| Democrats are the monsters! | |
| I mean, he's flailing. | |
| He's just throwing darts at a dartboard. | |
| Three different times he quits! | |
| Three different times he's like, I must leave for my home planet! | |
| They need me now! | |
| Just to think that, like, that that was how, like, Vladimir Putin would have a GRU team typing into the 4chan message boards. | |
| It's, like, so bizarre. | |
| It's, like, such a ridiculous idea to me that, like, that would have been the plan. | |
| So, like, that would have been, like, a high-level, multi-million dollar, like, for Russian intelligence operation would be so disjointed and slipshod. | |
| And... | |
| Like I think my favorite sign of like Russian meddling was when Joe M released his shitty anti-COVID movie. | |
| It got signal boosted for like a couple hours. | |
| It was trending on Twitter and like that was obviously a bot network. | |
| That was obviously Russian trolls who knew what Joe M was and what he was doing. | |
| And he put out his dumb piece of propaganda about the COVID lockdowns. | |
| And the Russian bots were like, let's amplify this. | |
| Let's give Joe M a push. | |
| Let's try to get him trending. | |
| Let's try to make this viral. | |
| And because his thing was like 13 minutes long and shitty and wasn't as cool as Plandemic or Falcoball or any of the other things, it got no traction and it died a death. | |
| Maybe we should get on that tip. | |
| Maybe we need Russian bots to amp us up. | |
| Which is why I'm proud to announce our new podcaster for the podcast, Fools Russia In. | |
| In Fools Russia In, we are going to talk about how great the motherland is and how Vladimir Putin's penis is large enough to satisfy any crevice. | |
| That's right, Fools Russia In, our podcaster on the podcast about how much we love Russia. | |
| Just message me, don't say it out loud in the podcast, message me how long you've been sitting on that pun, because I'm very proud of it, proud for you. | |
| I don't want to let the secret out. | |
| Oh, I mean, I'm happy to reveal that I thought of it as Mr. Mike Raines was speaking his point, and I was just politely waiting for him to be done before I trampled all over it with Fool's Russia. | |
| I love it! | |
| I'm pretty good at puns. | |
| It does not take me a while to formulate them. | |
| I'm not like Holt on Brooklyn Nine-Nine. | |
| I don't need overnight to come up with a juicy pun. | |
| They just kind of come to me. | |
| That's going to be our new five-minute podcast, Puns of Fun. | |
| We're just going to be... I'd be terrible at that. | |
| I'm awful at puns. | |
| I'm not bringing a lot to the table there. | |
| You're just going to sit there like a stack of pancakes? | |
| That's fine. | |
| Yeah. | |
| All right, folks. | |
| Thanks, as always, for your listener questions. | |
| This is the time of the podcast that you all know and love. | |
| That's right. | |
| This is Al, back to shill, to ask you that if you want to support the podcast, go ahead and tell your friends, tell your family, tell anybody you think might want to listen to three chuckleheads talk about QAnon, technically, and really mostly just old pop culture references for people in our Target demo. | |
| If you happen to have a little extra money, you can throw it our way. | |
| at our Patreon account, patreon.com slash poker politics or whatever. | |
| In doing so, you could join our list of supporters, which is growing. | |
| And in doing so, you can reserve yourself a shout out on one of our episodes, | |
| like the shout outs that are about to happen right now. | |
| I'm going to toss it over to Mike to do our grim work. | |
| I'm telling you people how great you are for giving us your money. | |
| Go ahead, Mike. | |
| So yes, we have two new generous donators on the $2 level. | |
| Molly V, who is a friend of the podcast. | |
| Yeah. | |
| We appreciate her helping us out while dealing with us chuckleheads in other areas of the internetosphere, as it were. | |
| Yeah, it actually means a lot, because I happen to know that Molly's career has been impacted by the pandemic. | |
| Like a lot of people's ads, but to have her throw some shuffles our way really means a lot. | |
| Thanks, Molly. | |
| Yes, and Manny C., also much appreciated that you sent me this money. | |
| He also sent me some information about various and sundry people in the QAnon community that I was like, wow, that was kind of eye-opening, and maybe somewhere down the line that will bear fruit, but we will leave that mysteriously there. | |
| Well, thanks for the dough and the info, Manny C. | |
| Yep. | |
| And also we have two new $5 beautiful babies. | |
| David R. Thank you so much. | |
| I think the $5 is kind of like, I don't know, a photo in your wallet, or maybe a photo on your, maybe it's the lock screen on your iPhone. | |
| And finally, Magic Window. | |
| Thank you so much for supporting our fun and frivolity here on the podcast. | |
| Always nice to have more beautiful babies trying to contribute in whatever way they can to the podcast. | |
| And that includes all the beautiful babies out there who are just spreading the word by telling people, hey, I know a podcast where three idiots talk kind of about QAnon. | |
| We understand that some of you might not be in a financial position to contribute monetarily, or maybe you're just like, hey, these three guys all sound like they have white penises and are on easy mode in life. | |
| Why should I give them my money? | |
| And the answer is, that's on you, boo. | |
| You don't have to give us any money, but if you're feeling charitable, you can go to love146.org and give them your money and help combat some child trafficking and all that horrible nonsense that we have to have a content warning at the top of the podcast, because there's no way to talk about Q without talking about child endangerment. | |
| Although they don't seem to do much about it. | |
| But love146.org does do some shit about it. | |
| So if you have the extra money to spend and you don't want to give it to us, give it to them! | |
| Do some good in the world. | |
| You know, you get back what you put in, right? | |
| So put some positivity out in the world in the form of some crisp dollarinos to a charitable cause. | |
| In this case, we are a charity as well. | |
| Not really a charity for legal purposes, but you know, we're charity cases. | |
| We're a couple plus one of bums talking about- We are not legally a charity. | |
| I report we are not legally a charity. | |
| Exactly, yes. | |
| Please do not sue us. | |
| We are not a charity. | |
| Love146.org is a charity, so you can go ahead and donate to them if you want. | |
| But I believe that is going to be it for another quote-unquote successful episode of the Adventures in Hellworld podcast. | |
| I am the enigmatic L here for Sarge. | |
| Say goodbye to the people, Sarge. | |
| Goodbye, people. | |
| And Mr. Mike Rains. | |
| Say goodbye to the people, Mr. Mike Rains. | |
| Mr. Mike Rains says goodbye to the people. | |
| This is Adventures in Hellworld signing off for another week. |