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Dec. 24, 2023 - Where There's Woke - Thomas Smith
56:50
WTW27: The War On Christmas

Ho Ho Ho? Or Ho Ho... NO!   That's right, it's almost Christmas which means GRAB YOUR GUNS LIBS LET'S HUNT. Lydia takes us through the history of this extremely stupid Fox News Panic.   Feel free to email us at lydia@seriouspod.com or thomas@seriouspod.com! Please pretty please consider becoming a patron at patreon.com/wherethereswoke!

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Time Text
What's so scary about the woke mob?
How often you just don't see them coming.
Anywhere you see diversity, equity, and inclusion, you see Marxism and you see woke principles being pushed.
Wokeness is a virus more dangerous than any pandemic hands down.
The woke monster is here and it's coming for everything.
Instead of go-go boots, the seductress green M&M will now wear sneakers.
Hello and welcome to Where There's Woke.
I'm Thomas.
That's Lydia.
How you doing?
I am feeling very merry.
Well, you just got shot by a progressive sniper.
Because the Woke are stealing Christmas as usual.
Yep.
Every year.
Happy War on Christmas.
I want to celebrate.
This is where there's Woke's first annual War on Christmas.
Well, what do you know about the War on Christmas?
The assassination of Franz Santa Ferdinand in the 19th, whatever, began the War on Christmas.
Okay, but let's get into it, because The War on Christmas is something that has been very big in Fox News and the right-wing media for quite a long time, but it's not just there.
The War on Christmas has been happening for, some say, up to a century ago.
Ten thousand years.
Oh, no.
Okay.
That doesn't make sense.
There was a document that Henry Ford put together back in 1921 titled, The International Jew, The World's Foremost Problem.
Yikes!
Yeah.
Now, how is that related to the war on Christmas?
Well, because he said, it was too hard to find Christmas cards that talked about Jesus.
And it's because Christmas is seen as anti-Semitic in the United States, is what he was implying.
Then I went into researching Xmas, and I don't know if I ever told you this story.
I've always been an atheist, but when certain people found out, I got this one question that was like, well, if you're an atheist, does that mean that you celebrate Xmas and not Christmas?
Really?
Yeah, and I was like, what?
What does that even mean?
But Xmas is really interesting.
Back in 1957, the Church League of America published this piece in News and Views, and it was titled X equals the unknown quantity.
And an anti-Semite, a few years later, Gerald L.K.
Smith wrote, it was a blasphemous omission of the name of Christ to title things Xmas and that Jews introduced Santa Claus to suppress the New Testament accounts of Jesus.
Okay, I love that.
That I love.
If we have the Jews to thank for Santa Claus, then I'm even more of a fan.
I didn't know this about Xmas.
I have just literally never thought about that.
I think as a kid, I figured like, oh, the X is just to shorten it.
Yeah, that's exactly what I thought.
Is it actually?
So, it's actually the letter Chi, and there's a well-documented history that it has been used to abbreviate Christ, and some say it's actually the symbol of the cross.
And so, like, if you look at a lot of, like, the Orthodox Christian imagery, they'll use the X a lot.
Is his name actually Kist?
That'd be fun.
Kist, yeah.
It's actually Jesus Kist, and you've had it wrong this whole time.
Yeah, so Xmas was interesting, right?
So now it has evolved where now it's about political correctness and the left and atheists and the secular progressives and that we've all gone too far.
And so I thought it'd be fun to kind of walk through what some of those claims are over history and how we get to today.
Yeah, and we're also going to bring on a professional killer of Christmas.
Yes.
For some parts of this.
Can't wait for that.
His name's Tom Curry, by the way.
Just in case you forget to introduce him later.
I don't know why I'm saying that.
We haven't gotten to it yet, but just keep that in your front pocket.
From what you're saying, it was mainly framed from the anti-Semitic standpoint early on, like these Jews are bringing Santa.
I wish I could summon Eli Bosnick to do a Jewish Santa impersonation.
We can't.
That would, of course, not be proper, but maybe that's next on my list.
I'll write it down.
Maybe I'll have him do it.
Yeah, so we started that in 1921.
We moved through the 50s and the 60s, and largely I didn't really see a lot of hubbub beyond that until 2002.
Which is pretty interesting, where this actually kind of stemmed out of New York City public schools banning the display of nativity scenes.
Oh, okay.
At public schools.
Well, it's also, I mean, I think the main thing going on here is the rise of the 24-hour news cycle.
Fox News still being pretty young then, like, what was Fox News in the late 90s or something?
But even when it started, you know, it took a while to evolve to what it became.
And obviously, Bush era, Iraq war, 9-11, all that, you got to fill the airwaves, especially like when, you know, there's like some war crimes that happen.
Fox News had to find other things to put there.
Well, it's like literally the year after 9-11.
Like, I can't imagine that people were really talking about anything related to, you know, Christians versus Jewish people and Muslim people or anything.
You didn't watch Fox News back then.
You weren't.
No.
Yeah, our household was all Fox News.
And so 9-11, Fox News was the 9-11 channel for a good, I'm not even joking, good like seven years.
Like it was, it was solidly through.
Yeah, it wasn't, it was through the whole entire Bush administration.
They were just like the 9-11 channel.
But then, you know, I'm sure they had to find other things.
They're like, oh, they're banning the whatevers.
What was it?
Baby Jesus stuff?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Just nativity scenes.
But they were allowing Christmas trees, Hanukkah menorahs, a Muslim star and crescent imagery.
Now, is this a real thing or this is they complained about it?
This was real.
Okay.
And it was a policy that was implemented, like I said, 2002 for the New York City public school system.
They were actually sued and they went to court and they won in 2006.
They did?
Four years later.
Yeah.
Yeah.
They were able to defend their policy.
There was nothing that indicated that they were discriminating based on religion with the policy.
I don't know that that would go the same way today.
I don't know if it would.
I'm counting down until when we see that.
Yeah, maybe I shouldn't remind people of that.
John Roberts, stop turning up.
Pause the show.
Pause the show.
Chief Justice Roberts, don't listen right now.
Okay.
That'll work.
Yeah.
Media Matters, specifically in 2011, they call out through their tracking of the war on Christmas that he actually spent more airtime talking about the war on Christmas than he'd talked about the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan.
Ah, so that's the key.
Once they became less popular, I was going to guess that like as the popularity drops down, they're like, you know, Nevermind all that.
Let's talk about, you know what's even worse than terrorism?
People saying happy holidays.
And then that's like, I'm not even exaggerating because you're saying in 2011, he literally spent more.
Keep in mind, Christmas is usually just covered like for a certain part of the year.
It's not like you cover the war on Christmas all year.
That would be weird.
Maybe two months.
Yeah, most.
So like the fact that he was able to squeeze in more war on Christmas in 2011 than the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq.
That's impressive.
That's very impressive.
Yeah, so crazy.
So we kind of start with his War on Christmas beginnings in 2004.
So even though we have that early 2002 instance, at Fox News in particular, the War on Christmas started in 2004, December 3rd, 2004.
And his show, The O'Reilly Factor, debuted a segment called Christmas Under Siege.
Their first story that they covered was that a Washington grade school banned a production of A Christmas Carol.
I think I see why there's some—this happens with major historical events, hun.
Don't worry about it.
Because what happened was, first we laid siege to Christmas.
And there's, you know, historians argue, was that officially the first act of war or not?
You know, it's like, do you start it when there's the first dead body over the war on Christmas?
Like when we killed the first elf or whatever?
Or do you start it when we laid siege to the concept of Christmas and cut off, you know, water supply, power supply, food?
So that's why it's a little confusing, but so somewhere between depends on which historian you're talking about, you know, which institution you work at, there's different schools of thought.
Exactly.
But okay, so we've taken out, so in 2004, we, the royal we, you proud few, We need Eli again.
So anyway, that's the year that we, the proud few fighting the war on Christmas.
What did we do?
We banned?
We killed a guy?
A production of A Christmas Carol.
We banned?
Okay.
Did we though?
So, it was one performance of the play.
It was a high school in Washington.
They canceled one performance of the play because the private theater company was going to charge admission, and that's a violation of the school's policy.
Wow, that doesn't at all sound like a war on Christmas.
Because, like, even going into this, I'm like, well, Christmas Carol, first off, that's not in the Bible, by the way.
I don't know if Christians know this.
Exactly.
That doesn't come from, like, the book of Scrooge.
There's not that.
I mean... We should write that.
Yeah, I'm trying to remember, like, specifically the book itself.
I don't know how Jesus-y it is.
I don't even know that it is, though.
Like, I mean, yeah, Christmas is Christmas, but, like, I'm just saying, again, we all know this is nonsense, except the Fox News viewers, but, like, at least get your nonsense straight.
Why would we want... I said The Muppets Christmas.
The Muppets Christmas Carol is my favorite fucking movie, like, ever.
A Christmas Carol is a universally beloved, amazing story.
There's no fucking way that some like atheist antichrist got into a position of power at the school district and was like, step one, banning one performance of a Christmas Carol.
Yep, yep.
So it was O'Reilly and his guest, Anthony R. Picarello Jr., who were talking about this.
And Picarello, at the time, and I'm not sure if he still is, president of the Beckett Fund for Religious Liberty.
And the reason he talked about this was because Picarello said that the Beckett Fund would be awarding their annual Ebenezer Award to the school.
Wow.
The person or group responsible for the most ridiculous affront to the Christmas and Hanukkah holidays.
And was this a kid's performance, are you saying?
It was a private theater company, so I'm imagining... I thought you said it was a... Did I get it wrong?
They were to perform... Sorry, the school was to visit the performance.
Oh, okay.
It was the high school.
Oh, so it was... How the... Talk about obscure.
Like, how do they even find this?
I don't know.
Some conservative nutjob parent complained.
So it was... So a school was going to do, like, a field trip to a performance.
Is that what it is?
Yeah.
And then they canceled that because they didn't want to pay for it or something.
Yeah, because their policy is that they will not pay admission for the performance.
Oh, OK.
So who's who is doing the war on Christmas is what I want to know.
Is it the theater company that wouldn't let them see it for free or is it the school?
Like who in their mind is the who?
Who needs the Medal of Honor?
Is what I'm asking.
I mean, the school's getting it, apparently.
Is the school who got the Ebenezer Award?
The school got the Ebenezer Award.
Oh, okay.
Because I was going to anticipate a really funny scene when they- whoever's doing that production finds out, Guys, we won the Ebenezer Award!
Holy shit!
That must- Hey!
Jerry!
You won the Ebenezer Award for- No, that's not what this is.
They're saying you ruined Christmas.
What?
Yep.
Yeah, it has nothing to do with acting.
It's just a stupid fox.
Oh, never mind!
So that's how we start The War on Christmas is this incredibly flimsy claim that was out of nowhere.
And like you said, like, where did they even find this story in particular?
Incredible.
Like this tiny, I mean, I don't know if it's tiny.
Well, I guess Kirkland, Washington.
Big enough town, but like a random high school.
How?
How did this happen?
Yeah.
Yeah.
And ever since then, it's only been getting less and less relevant.
Yep.
Still in 2004, another big story for War on Christmas was that Target had banned the Salvation Army from its stores.
Good.
They did?
Really?
Well, yeah.
But the reason why is... Do you have any guesses?
Well, I was going to get, so if you told me, so we're imagining that Bill O'Reilly, the O'Reilly factor.
Welcome everybody.
Tonight, Target kicked out the entire Salvation Army from all their stores.
And then Lydia, star reporter from where there's vocal research hit from 2000 whatever.
And it would be like one manager of a Target didn't like the one person who was doing the ringing the bell outside for the Salvation Army or whatever it is.
And then that would be what happened.
Like that would, that would be my guess.
If I were to say it would be some personal dispute.
Oh, okay.
Great.
They have a no solicitation policy.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
And so they weren't enforcing it against the Salvation Army, I guess, in years past.
And then they reviewed it and they're like, oh, this looks really unfair across the board.
We have to make sure we're following policy.
They notify the Salvation Army in January 2004.
And then they had almost a year.
To figure out how to partner with Target otherwise, because Target put that offer out there.
They said, you know, as long as it follows policy, we'd be happy to support your efforts.
We'd be happy to partner with you in a project if you have something in mind.
And Salvation Army never got back to them.
Wow.
Just a reminder, the Salvation Army fucking sucks.
Yeah, don't put any money in there.
No, not at all.
They're terrible.
So that's good.
Homophobic.
Yeah.
Pat Robertson chimed in on this.
Here we go.
May he rest in hell.
I think Walmart is a great store that sells things at a low price and they can match Target on almost everything.
So why should you stop at a store that is banning the wonderful work of the Salvation Army with those kettles that raise money to feed the poor and the needy?
They do great work and they've never had one breath of scandal in all the time they've been around.
They are a tremendous organization and this is going to cost them something in the neighborhood of nine or ten million dollars.
So maybe you could take that out of Target's hide and give it to Walmart.
Walmart allows the Salvation Army to put out those kettles.
So keep that in mind when you do your Christmas shopping, please.
Hey, everybody, you know how you love getting fucking bothered while you're trying to do something else, while you're trying to shop for Christmas presents, while you yourself don't have enough money to buy all of them?
You better go to Walmart to buy worse quality stuff and get harassed more by those people, okay?
I wonder if that worked.
I kind of doubt it.
Yeah, I don't know.
So that was 2004.
Those were the big stories.
Christmas Carol was banned and Target hates the Salvation Army and targeting them.
But I'm pumped.
2005.
You know, I have a video of this one.
Let me see if I can send this on over to you.
I've had to do some really weird searches to try and find things that have been scrubbed like otherwise.
Yeah, it's not that easy to find this stuff.
That's one thing that surprised me about doing this show.
I always think like, well, surely every Fox News episode of everything ever should be somewhere.
But if it is, we haven't found it.
So if you know where we can find like every episode of O'Reilly, Ever.
Let me know.
All right.
Here we go.
12-15-05.
I'm a sophomore in college.
Those were the days.
Oh man, that was my senior year of high school.
Wow.
So what happened here?
Bill O'Reilly talks to some Catholic leaders about the war on Christmas.
Flashback, everybody.
We're probably killing thousands of innocent people in the Middle East per day, but, you know, let's focus on what the real tragedy is.
We had almost the exact same discussion, Father McBride, about the priest pedophilia scandal.
Father McBride is a character I would come up with if I was like, okay, you got to make a fake O'Reilly segment.
All right, they probably have like a Father McBride in a little hand or something.
When I just said, look, we can't get one cardinal, one archbishop to come on a program and say anything.
And now here we are again.
Even too busy molesting kids.
And the same thing except for Sheehan.
What's going on?
Well, first of all, Bill, this is a very different sort of issue.
I mean, the pedophilia crisis and scandal that was associated with it was enormously significant.
In fact, I think the most important crisis the Catholic Church in America has ever faced.
This controversy over a Christmas celebration, whether to say Happy Holidays or Merry Christmas, or to allow nativity scenes, crashes, and so forth, or to call Christmas trees Christmas trees rather than holiday trees, is a very minor issue in comparison.
What?
So someone came on and just was like, hey, dummy?
Yeah.
Wow.
Yeah.
So O'Reilly invites these Catholic leaders to say, hey, you know, you guys were silent on pedophilia for a long time.
Is this what's happening again?
You're silent on the war on Christmas?
What?
We got 65 million American Catholics, okay?
And they don't hear a word from any Catholic leadership on the subject at all.
The Protestants have at least a half dozen.
We got Falwell, Wildman, they're gonna be on next week.
We've got campaigns that the Protestants have organized to say to retailers, hey, listen, if you don't, if you disrespect... This is his Frost-Nixon moment.
Like, this is Bill O'Reilly being like, we got him.
Come here.
I'm gonna ask you why you haven't come on here.
I'm gonna win awards for this.
Talk to the American people about holiday trees.
Making like a spotlight, but with this.
The holiday of Christmas.
We're gonna let our people know.
All of this is in play on the Protestant side.
Zippo on the Catholic side.
Go ahead.
But Bill, it's a certain segment of the Protestant side, and I don't intend to diminish them or to put them down, but mainstream Protestants generally are in the same boat, as it were, as mainstream Catholics and their bishops.
Look, for decades, Catholics and mainstream Protestants have bemoaned the commercialization of Christmas, using the religious aspects of the feast to sell products.
And what's happened?
Two things have happened.
One is that this nation has changed.
In 1955, Will Herberg, a very famous social scientist, wrote a book called Protestant Catholic Jew.
In 1955, that was the religious landscape of this country.
The only real non-Christians in this country were Jews.
And they were a small minority.
Today, there are many, many millions of non-Christians beyond the Jewish community.
And so, you know, business is business.
It's out to make a profit, and it doesn't want to alienate potential customers.
Yeah, but you know that's dopey.
And we also have a very provocative segment.
Why aren't the prelates of the Catholic Church in America, the cardinals and the archbishops, standing up for Christmas?
Why?
There's only one that will talk to us.
Sheehan out in New Mexico.
Archbishop Sheehan.
Where are the others?
Where are they?
If you don't stick up for the baby Jesus, who are you going to stick up for?
Now they're MIA in the pedophilia scandals.
Now they're MIA in the Christmas controversy.
Those are very different things.
Yeah.
They're MIA in the mass slaughter of men, women, and child.
And also, I stubbed my toe the other day.
They aren't talking about it at all.
Two issues they need to talk about.
So crazy.
Yeah.
That is amazing.
Yeah.
It's amazing how serious he is.
Like, Bill O'Reilly had a sense of humor, kind of.
He had more of a sense of humor than fucking the last guy to get banned.
Tucker.
Tucker Carlson.
Tucker Carlson's just a psychopath.
O'Reilly, you could almost think of him as like, that's a human, even though, you know, he sucks.
But he's dead fucking serious.
There's no tongue in cheek.
This is him five seconds away from saying, fuck it, we'll do it live.
He's like, that's his demeanor right now.
And he's like, if you don't stick up for the baby Jesus.
But you know that's dopey, he says.
Yeah.
Imagine, wait.
That's dopey.
O'Reilly is Catholic, right?
I think so.
I'm pretty sure he is.
It's pretty amazing to have, like, a father of your fucking faith on or whatever.
And he's like, yeah, you know, this is dumb for the following really well thought out reasons.
For one, it's capitalism, man.
Don't we care?
Aren't you a Fox News right-wing capitalism guy, you would think?
Like, that's a good appeal to him.
Yeah.
Yeah, they're just appealing to the citizenry.
It's business, yeah.
Corporations.
Yeah, but that's dopey.
What?
I know.
Oh, man.
So that was 2005.
Very exciting year for that.
We're going to step into 2006.
We have some stuff from his radio show for this.
Talk about what's going on there.
Hey, let's see how the war has escalated.
How many dead?
How many injured?
Missing?
A lot of people missing?
Never to be seen again from the war on Christmas?
It's a bunch of people who are running around and they're angry, but they've got no direction for the anger.
Does he know his mic is on?
Bill, we're live!
Oh, sorry, yeah, no, I was talking about the audience.
...insane things that every day I come into work and I say to myself, um, how can this be happening?
I have to tell you that I did not want to do Christmas controversy stories this year.
You know, we did it last year.
We won the war.
Oh, they won!
Oh, okay.
Walmart and Macy's and all the big stores are saying Merry Christmas and they've stopped ordering their employees not to say it.
Most of them.
Is that anything?
Were they actually ordering their employees not to say Merry Christmas?
No.
Everything I've seen for any store involved with these things is that, you know, they expect customer service.
Yeah.
And friendly demeanor.
Yeah.
And there is no policy forbidding employees from saying Merry Christmas.
It'd be pretty weird to be like, if you see a guy coming in wearing a yarmulke, you'd better yell Merry Christmas in his face.
Like, because we're a business and that's, what are you talking about?
The place where it's most appropriate Just have a rule that you say happy holidays would be something like a public facing business that welcomes literally anyone off the street in to shop there.
That would be a place where you wouldn't want to like offend anybody.
Maybe people are going to come spend their money to buy Hanukkah presents.
Or something.
Be like, happy holidays.
It's totally fine.
That's not a war on Christmas, asshole.
But I love... This is cool to have this on the record.
I think he realized, like, fuck, that was a little short-sighted to do the war on Christmas for one year and then declare victory.
That was a little...
I don't know what I was thinking.
I forgot that we need constant grievance forever.
Our channel is the grievance channel.
We can't just be like, hey, we won this one, everybody, relax.
No, you gotta be constantly aggrieved all the time.
And so he's like, yeah, no, because we did win, but it's like one of those movies where the body at the last minute opens its eye and then credits, and then you're like, shit, the sequel.
Crate and barrel are two that still are ordering their people not to say Merry Christmas, which is the worst kind of fascism.
You have a right to do it, but it's just stupid.
But anyway, this season, I said to myself, you know, with all the trouble we have overseas and the war on terror, I really don't want to get into the Christmas thing again.
We won it, it was a worthy campaign, but we have to do it again.
And then, I'm confronted with the stuff.
So that is the end game.
No, I think it skipped.
You get back to Crate and Barrel and Best Buy who are ordering their employees.
If you say Merry Christmas, we will fire you.
Did you look that up or anything?
It's not true.
No!
Yeah, so apparently there was an article that was published that a Crate and Barrel spokesperson had said, we would definitely not say Merry Christmas, but when they reached out to her, you know, kind of investigating the group ThinkProgress had reached out to her, and she said her quote was misconstrued.
They have no policy encouraging or discouraging store employees from saying Merry Christmas or any other greeting.
Best Buy does not forbid its employees to say Merry Christmas, and they said that they can greet customers however you like, including Merry Christmas, but their promotional efforts as a company Yeah!
are going to be happy holidays, to your point, because it's as inclusive as possible and encouraging folks of all religions and backgrounds and whatever they might celebrate to come and shop at your store. - Yeah, the cartoon world these idiots live in, where it's like, what happens is you're fucking, where would the cartoon world these idiots live in, where it's like, what happens is you're Your minimum wage, middle management, Best Buy employees, like huddle up everyone.
I just heard someone say, and I'm not going to repeat the language because frankly, it's, it's obscene.
Married to a customer.
If I find out who that was.
You're gonna be out on your ass.
So fat!
Like, who cares?
Nobody would ever do that.
It's stupid.
Especially during the holidays.
You could definitely spare a bunch of employees during the holidays.
If you're a retail store, you're fine.
You're up to your ass and extra employees.
Yeah, you'll figure Black Friday out.
Hey, you didn't tie your shoe, you're fired.
You said Merry Christmas, you're fired.
Yeah, can you imagine Best Buy losing employees around the holidays?
That would be rough.
When people shopped.
When people actually shopped in person.
Even now it's still pretty busy, but like, yeah.
That would have been insane.
The cartoon idiot land these people inhabit.
It's insane.
Okay?
It is, to me, an affront.
So I don't shop at those places.
I don't want to give them my business.
Because they annoy me.
Nothing more.
Hey, that's your right.
Nothing more.
It's annoying.
I don't want to do business with those people.
My right.
Now, it is their right to tell their employees what they can and cannot say.
Unfortunately, private companies can do that.
Unfortunately.
Unfortunately?
Yeah, yeah.
I love that they just don't ever have to care at all about consistency in their positions, ever.
It never matters.
Yeah, I know, it's nonsense.
To this day, it doesn't matter.
Oh, censorship, free speech.
Hey, you need to tell people not to say happy holidays or they'll be killed.
Like, it's just whatever is the argument of convenience at the time.
I was going to do a gotcha of his whole thing, but he gotcha'd himself.
He's already admitting.
I miss O'Reilly now that I hear him more.
Cause he like had this weird, somewhat self-awareness where he would state the obvious counter argument, but then still be like, yeah, but still like you just say like, yeah, it's their right.
But you know, fucking, I don't like it.
It's their right.
So it's basically my right.
I'm not going to buy your little barrel or a crate.
And I'm not going to Best Buy.
I'm going to go someplace that says Merry Christmas because it's the Christmas season.
That's why you get gifts.
You give gifts because it's Christmas time.
Oh, yeah.
Unless, you know, you celebrate a different holiday.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Eight days of gift giving for Hanukkah.
Don't acknowledge the tradition.
I ain't going to.
I'm not going to pay.
I'm not going to do it.
Yeah, so we're gonna skip forward a little bit in our little journey.
I said I don't want your crate!
Good day!
I already have plenty of barrels at home.
We're going to step away from O'Reilly for a second because it wasn't just O'Reilly at Fox News that was talking about this.
And I'll get into that a little bit later, but we're going to swing on over to Fox and Friends for a story in 2010.
Oh, OK.
Because, I mean, O'Reilly was like the flagship for a long time.
I remember the other shows were like, even my Fox News parents didn't bother with the other people.
It was mainly like, wait for O'Reilly factor and then They saw a little bit of Hannity and Combs and were like, I fucking hate this.
Even them.
But they probably hated it because Hannity and Combs, the idea was they had like Combs was supposed to be like a liberal or something.
And so they just got more and more tired of having anyone express any other beliefs on their shows.
Yeah.
We'll get back to O'Reilly.
Don't worry.
But we're going to do a little detour.
All right, here we go.
Ho, ho, ho?
Well, how about no, no, no?
An elementary school in Central Florida.
11 out of 10.
A no-notes perfect introduction.
Ho, ho, ho?
More like no, no, no.
All things Christmas this holiday season.
Teachers, it's not funny.
Teachers even eliminating traditional Christmas colors like red and green.
Wow, they eliminate... Listen here, you little shits.
No red this year.
Yep.
This is so crazy, I can't even read the story.
They're not gonna let red and green in the classroom.
Yeah, right.
Heathrow Elementary says it's abiding by school board...
This is one of my favorite things about covering these idiots.
Is that time, we've had this with everything.
We had it with the fucking lost teacher asshole.
Where he's like, you have to just ask yourself, can this be real?
Yeah, Killborn.
Can this be right?
This sounds insane.
You're just asking yourself like, can this possibly be?
And the answer is no, it's not.
They have this thing where like, They accidentally realize like, oh, this must be bullshit.
And they're like, oh, this can't be, there's no way they're banning red and green.
I can't even read this story, but it's definitely real.
It's definitely real, everybody.
For sure.
...policy, which requires employees to be neutral when it comes to religion.
I don't think Jesus wore red or green.
But some parents say this goes just a little too far.
How do you equate red and green with Jesus?
I don't get it.
Brian?
What?
I know.
So Warm Christmas is not about Christianity.
Does she have like another personality striving to get out?
That was like counter, that was incredible.
That was like, she was counter-argumenting herself during the set.
I actually want to, okay, let's re-listen to this 30 seconds.
The playback.
Imagining that there's someone within her trying to get out, like a liberal or something.
No, no, no!
An elementary school in Central Florida banning all things Christmas this holiday season.
Teachers, it's not funny.
Teachers even eliminating traditional Christmas colors like red and green.
What?
This is so crazy, I can't even read the story.
They're not going to let red and green in the classroom.
Yeah, right.
Detour Elementary says it's abiding by school board policy, which requires employees to be neutral when it comes to religion.
I don't think Jesus wore red or green.
But some parents say this goes just a little too far.
How do you equate red and green with Jesus?
Brian?
Brian Kilmeade is so confused.
I can't figure it out.
It's so crazy.
I need at least a commercial.
I mean, take away the nativity scene and now you're going to take away red and green?
It's crazy.
It's so crazy.
You read the next story.
Yeah, so this story, I have no idea where they came up with enough words to fill out that segment, because this story is literally from one article that says, one parent said classrooms can't show Santa Claus or use traditional Christmas colors.
You can't use red and green, a parent said.
It's ridiculous.
That was it.
Like, what?
That's the origination of this story.
What media was that?
Local newspaper.
Oh, a local newspaper.
Yeah.
And Media Matters had covered this at the time, and they reached out to the school district, and the school district's response was, there is not a ban on the colors red and green at Heathrow Elementary.
That's just not true.
That's not true at all.
And it was one parent is your source.
Now we're seeing this pattern where they have to reach out.
Ah, we found the parking lot attendant who works in the parking garage by the Hilton who allegedly said happy holidays and said we located him and we asked him for a statement and through a spokesperson, the parking lot attendant said that didn't happen.
And you're like, what?
What is any fucking, are you kidding me?
Yep.
And what it needs to be is, oh, what we did is we located the fuck you, this is stupid.
No, we didn't because who cares?
Yeah.
Now we're just going to go forward a year, 2011, the year that O'Reilly talked about this stuff a lot.
Here we go.
Man, okay, so a couple little quick ones.
Well, first off, can you give us an update on how the numbers are doing?
How many dead?
Who is perceived by historians to be winning at this point in history?
It's a slugfest.
I think we're winning.
I think we're winning because otherwise, why would they have to keep doing this every single year?
Yeah, which makes the tragedy of imagining Christmas thinking it won that first year.
That is a cool story.
It's like, oh, we got this.
We're good.
We want, remember, it's all over and done.
No, it's not.
That was 2005 or something, 18 years later.
You're still losing.
Still going.
Some of the stories that they covered was, Obamas have too many Christmas decorations in the White House.
Oh, God.
There's too many.
Too many.
They over-decorated.
It's very confusing.
How does that fit with the rest of the... I don't understand.
But it was the Obamas.
I don't understand.
It's the Trojan horse of the war on Christmas.
See?
They let the Christmas trees in there and then little men crawl out of the Christmas trees and attack Christmas while it's sleeping.
That's why that's bad.
Yeah, and then there was a big whole thing about there was a Christmas tree tax and Obama was pandering to Muslims and showing contempt for Christianity because he implemented this Christmas tree tax.
But that was actually an industry-led program under the Bush administration.
I'm going to go ahead and say there is no fucking chance that Barack Obama implemented a Christmas tree tax.
Yeah.
That's not a sentence that can even happen, actually, because Congress would have to pass something.
And then the president could sign it, I guess.
But I don't remember Barack Obama campaigning on a Christmas tree tax, because that's fucking insane.
Yeah.
And the reason there was a Christmas tree tax, they used that money to help establish a marketing campaign promoting the sale of fresh Christmas trees.
The industry wanted it.
Bush administration said, OK.
They took this Bush era thing that is like designed to help big Christmas tree.
Yeah.
And they're like, look at this.
He's taxing.
Jesus Christ.
You know what?
This is a good holiday episode.
In addition to obviously being the one on Christmas.
This also serves as a reminder of why if you're visiting, you know, your Boomer family this this holiday season, why their brains are mush.
Why their brains are literal oatmeal coming out of their ears, because it's been two decades of this fucking nonsense.
Yep.
They're used to the news telling them the facts and the truth.
And so they're not going to go independently verify anything.
And it has not taken me that long.
I mean, when you compile all the stories together, yeah, it's a lot.
But story by story, like debunking.
Oh, no, they are not.
Fox News is not worried about their audience fact checking.
Yeah.
But they just kind of take it at face value.
Yeah.
And so then we're going to go to a little video right here about how important the war on Christmas is.
Coach Warrior segment tonight.
We expect Obama bashing, as I said, and economic questions to dominate the debate tonight.
But cultural problems should also come up.
So what should the candidates be asked in that area?
Here now, the Warriors themselves, Margaret Hoover, author of the big new book, American Individualism.
I'm sorry.
Fox and Friends co-host Christian Carlson.
All right Carlson, if you were moderating tonight and you had an opportunity to ask a cultural question, what would the first question be?
As president, how important would it be for you to address the political correctness in our society many argue is totally out of control from the war on Christmas to leaving the word God out of the Pledge of Allegiance to not calling the alleged courthood shrewd.
You mean the thing that's still in the Pledge of Allegiance that should be fucking out of What are you talking about?
The idiot Supreme Court, I don't remember what year that was, but that's upheld.
I would love to get rid of that stupid shit, but we can't.
So what do you mean that we're not safe?
Whatever.
I know.
...to not calling the alleged Fort Hood shooter what he is, a homegrown Muslim terrorist.
How is that harmful moving forward for our nation?
Alright, I like that question.
But it might be a little bit too open-ended.
They might go, oh, it's terrible, and we should be honest, and da-da-da-da-da-da-da.
Is this a meeting to discuss this?
I know!
PC, I think, is absolutely... He's not her boss!
I think it might start with, you know, is PC harming the country?
And if you believe that, how?
And the second part of my question was...
Thanks for the note, Bill.
What message does it send to our next generation of kids that we're sort of taking away all of these things that we used to have in our society?
Why?
Because we don't want to offend one person.
You know, I don't believe the Z offends stuff.
That's not the reason.
The reason is they don't like God and they don't like traditional America.
Isn't that crazy?
Yeah.
Can you imagine?
How uncomfortable is that segment?
Jesus.
Oh, I know.
It's so bad.
It's like she's giving him like a pitch like they're in the writer's room, right?
Well, did she moderate that debate?
No.
He said, if you were going to moderate the debate, what would the question be that you'd ask?
Wow.
Yeah.
So and he's like, all right, let's tighten up the language here and shut up, dude.
You're doing a segment.
It doesn't matter.
Yeah.
And also, can you imagine the debate stage for presidential candidates?
What are you going to do about the war on Christmas?
Yeah, so this is Mitt Romney.
Romney and Obama.
Oh, sorry, this is the primary.
So it's like, probably was some of the usual suspects we saw in 16 as well.
I think, what's his name whose brain melted out of his ear?
Rudy Giuliani.
Yeah, Rudy Giuliani was probably involved at some point.
Oh, yeah.
Seriously, it's Rick Santorum, Mitt Romney, Ron Paul, and Newt Gingrich.
Newt Gingrich?
Wait, you're telling me that was a debate.
I want to watch that.
That was like the final four of, that's a sparse field of candidates.
Okay.
Yeah, it sure was.
So that was 2011.
And all right, here's the first big debunk.
Ooh, I'm excited for a big debunk.
2012.
Because up till now, every story about the war on Christmas has been dead on accurate.
You tried to debunk, and you're like, damn, they crossed their T's and dotted their I's over when they talked to the fucking Christmas tree lot.
And they're like, hey, is there a tax on Christmas?
Yeah, solid, 100%.
This one's a fun one.
Here we go.
Have we taken the political correctness too far, replacing Merry Christmas with Happy Holidays across our entire American culture?
Who better to ask?
Across our entire American... I already... Hey, I'll help you with the demon con.
I know this was yours.
That's wrong.
The source is me.
So this is like exactly a year later, just about, so.
Yep.
December 2012, okay.
Than a man who has helped Santa Claus 365 days a year!
That's right.
Sal Lizard is the author of Being Santa Claus, What I Learned About the True Meaning of Christmas.
That's the name of the book.
Santa, if you will, I understand you don't like to say happy holidays.
Why?
Well, you know, actually I wish people always have happy holidays, but I tend to be a little bit more specific.
I can't find any reference where Santa's ever said anything other than Merry Christmas.
So I like to wish people a Merry Christmas.
And what's the response to all the hundreds and thousands of kids that you've come across in all these years that you've been Santa's helper?
- What?
- Well, what can I say?
Children are one-- - Sorry, what?
I just listened to the language.
This person, you know what?
I feel bad for her because everything she says probably gets notes from Bill O'Reilly because this is one of the same ladies that was on that one.
So maybe she just doesn't even know how to function anymore.
- Yeah, Gretchen Carlson, yeah.
- Merry Christmas.
- And what's the response to all the hundreds and thousands of kids that you've come across in all these years that you've been Santa's helper? - What's the response?
From?
Oh, okay.
It must be from.
From the kids, all the years that you- So, she's asking, when you say Merry Christmas, are they like, Fuck you!
It's Happy Holidays!
And then they kick him in the nuts and he's like, Fuck you, Santa.
Fucking Santa can't even say Happy Holidays.
Well, what can I say?
Children are wonderful.
Yeah.
I've always had pleasant responses from them.
Yeah.
And parents, too.
I like to think that I'm a Santa for boys and girls of all ages.
Indeed.
And I know that you, you know, people will see you on the street and throughout the year and they'll refer to you as Santa.
Your car says the Santa Mobile and you have got the biggest belt buckle I have ever seen, Santa.
You know what they say about the size of a man's belt buckle?
Or a prize fighter.
So what do you make of, you've been around for a long time doing this, what do you make of the political correctness of our culture?
Have you seen it change over time?
Uh, I have.
You know, I always do go to Santa Claus.
Isn't that crazy?
Who better to ask about the war on Christmas than Santa?
You've got a guy who cosplays as a fictional creature character thing.
Yep.
To answer our tough, hard-hitting political questions.
Get the fuck out of here, you weren't invited.
Santa Claus.
But there was a time a few years back when suddenly I started showing up at Christmas parties and was told that they were having holiday parties, and so therefore they didn't need a Santa anymore.
Why did you show up to them?
Well, he'd be hired.
Yeah, no, he's hired and they're like, hey, get the fuck out of here.
You hired me.
Yeah, I hired you so that I could say, fuck you.
Yeah.
What?
Yeah.
And at about that time, that was the time when I think the Surgeon General said that Santa should lay off the cookies and start picking up more carrots and broccoli.
Oh, there you go.
There's another one.
I actually remember that one.
I do too.
Dennis in Australia had to say, ha ha ha, so as not to offend.
Certain gals and... So, pause there.
Pause there.
Okay.
Yeah.
Santas in Australia had to say, ha ha ha.
So they wouldn't offend certain gals.
Yeah.
The hoes of Australia got together.
We... The hoes from these area codes.
So... Lest you think it's just local hoes.
This claim is from 2007.
Oh my god.
And by the way, we're in 2012.
So this is the kind of stuff they have to like keep recycling over and over because they have fucking nothing obviously.
Well, he's like digging like deep in his memory because Griffin Carlson was like, tell us about some anti-TC stuff.
And sorry to interrupt you, but like I wanted to say that about this very conceit.
I love how they constantly cross up their own purposes because they're like, You know, here's who we're going to have on to say how much people don't want Christmas anymore.
A guy who's a, checks notes, professional Santa Claus.
So they're going to have the guy who apparently makes his living being hired to be Santa Claus.
And in their idiot minds, whatever producer, whoever's in charge of this, they're like, He'll get on, he'll have a black eye, bloody nose.
He'll be poor.
He'll be poor, exactly.
Yeah, his arm in a sling.
Disheveled.
And he'll be like, I haven't gotten a job in 20 years.
I am still wearing the outfit, but I can't do this anymore.
Nobody wants it.
I get beaten up on site.
His shell shock.
No, he's gonna be like, well, no, literally all I do is say ho, ho, ho, Merry Christmas, and it's joy the whole time.
There's still lines at every mall in America to meet Santa Claus, you idiots.
Okay, sorry, now the debunker.
Yeah, so back in 2007, in Australia, that is true.
2007 in Australia?
That part's true, okay.
Yes, that time existed in Australia.
So they had a 2007.
Yes, there were Santas in Australia in 2007.
There was a Santa training, and the Santa training was geared towards being more attentive to kids' needs, because some kids, if they hear ho, ho, ho in a booming, deep voice, Oh, for sure.
That can be jarring.
I mean, some kids are just scared by the sight of Santa, and then now you're going to add in a really deep, intense voice, and they don't know what the heck is happening.
So the training was really geared to, like, how to spot when kids need a different approach.
And it could be that you're changing the tone of your voice.
It could be that you are starting with a joke instead of saying ho, ho, ho right away.
And we're using another phrase, Merry Christmas out the gate, right?
Rather than saying, ho, ho, ho.
There was literally nothing, nothing.
They asked this company over and over and over, multiple different outlets asked them, the company that was doing the Santa trainings.
Jesus fucking Christ.
No, mate!
No!
Oh, weird.
dispersing Santa's across Australia.
No, mate!
No!
And they said no, it was really just being attentive to kids' needs and knowing that every kid's different and giving them kind of tips and tricks on how to change their approach.
Oh, weird.
You mean it was a totally reasonable thing that a business was probably doing to be a better business?
One Santa came out of the woodwork through this and said, "You know, I was fired for saying 'ho, ho, ho'." And then the company was like, no, we fired you because you have a bad attitude and you sucked.
And he killed a kid.
And so they had to say that to the newspaper.
You know, it's like, man, if you like didn't go there, dude, like now your name is associated with having a terrible attitude being Santa Claus.
You're 15 minutes of fame.
God, I couldn't remember the number.
That phrase doesn't really exist anymore because of TikTok.
Yeah, like online stuff.
You just say your viral moment.
I'm having an existential crisis right now.
There's been a war on the phrase 15 minutes of fame.
We don't say it anymore.
That's amazing.
Yeah.
I thought you were going to tell the story, by the way, of us taking several, like, fucking years to get Phoebe to visit a mall Santa.
Oh, yeah, we did it once, but never again.
I thought we tried to get close the second time.
We tried to get close and she made it to the fence and then she was like, I'm not doing that.
Yeah, I'm not too scared.
So, yeah.
Any parent who's had a kid that gets scared at all knows that you can't just go, like right in their ear.
Some of them are gonna literally shit their fucking, they'll be so scared they'll be shaking.
Like that's just how some kids are.
And that Santas in England weren't allowed to have children on their laps anymore.
Yeah.
So as not to create an image of impropriety.
I agree with that one actually.
Yeah, this is something that, yes, in England, at schools, there were volunteer Santas, other random parents, that previously, they used to have to pass a criminal records bureau check, and then they removed that requirement, so the schools decided, hey, without that in place, we're just going to have a policy default that kids don't sit on the lap unless they want to and the parents want them to.
So there was still an opportunity for that to happen?
Boy, that sure is exactly what I would want the policy to be.
Exactly.
I think it's weird to have children sit on Santa's lap.
Yeah, like you don't know.
And I don't recall if he says it in this interview.
That's kind of where the interview ends there, so we can stop the video.
But he does mention, I think in another interview I was reading with him elsewhere, that kids aren't really sitting in Santa's lap anymore.
Like, usually the people who are sitting in my laps are people at office parties.
Yeah.
Oh, man, I wish we had a clip of that.
I know.
No, I think it was just a written interview.
Oh, damn.
Yeah.
That's awesome.
Santa gets really freaky in the interview.
They're like, okay, all right.
Yeah, exactly.
And I have one more video to wrap us up in 2012.
Ben Stein talking about how- Oh, man, I love it.
What the hell happened to Ben?
Did he die?
He hasn't been around for a long time.
Yeah, what the- I am just realizing, where the fuck is Ben Stein?
I wonder if he was, yeah, is he like, oh, Trump is so stupid that he can't do it or no?
Hmm.
Yeah.
When's the last time you heard about Ben Stein doing anything?
Okay.
Ben Stein at the Nixon library.
Sure.
That makes sense.
Didn't he work in the Nixon administration?
I think he did.
Oh, really?
Pretty sure.
Yeah, I'm just looking.
Ben Stein News.
I know this is the topic of the show, but just because I was worried about the man, you know.
Sure.
As of February 2023, so, you know, it's getting on a year ago, but Ben Stein, this is from the New York Post headline, I miss when, quote, a large African-American woman was on Aunt Jemima's syrup.
Oh my God.
So he's still, you know, he's still, still active.
We're getting sidetracked, but this is worth it.
This is fucking, I gotta watch this.
Oh God.
Oh, he looks horrible.
Okay, so he's pretty old.
Do something which I sometimes do, which is to make breakfast for dinner.
Aunt Jemima yummy pancake syrup.
Now this used to show a large African-American woman chef, but because of the inherent racism of America's corporate culture, Holy crap.
I wonder if he had a stroke.
Yeah, he sounds really bad.
Well, he looks really bad too, so maybe that's why we haven't heard from him.
How optimistic I am.
I was like, oh, maybe he's like a never Trump.
No.
- I wonder if he had a stroke. - Yeah, he sounds really bad. - Well, he looks really bad too, so maybe that's why we haven't heard from him.
Oh, yeah.
How optimistic I am.
I was like, oh, maybe he's like a never Trump, no. - Oh yeah, no, it says that he voted for Trump, so yeah.
Well, fuck you.
Yeah.
So that's where he is.
Okay.
So that's Ben Stein now.
Yep.
Is this one back when he was in his prime?
Yeah.
Prime, quote unquote, 2012.
Oh, wow.
Yeah.
He has really gone downhill.
Joining us now from Los Angeles, Ben Stein, Jewish guy, thinks the whole war on Christmas is insane.
And you said that before.
I like to think that Bill O'Reilly just screams the race or ethnic group or religious group of whatever.
Oh, we're having this guy on my show!
It's like a Tourette's that he has.
Some time, Mr. Stein, right?
I have.
You can call me Ben.
I've been saying it for a long time.
I'm Jewish.
All of my ancestors are Jewish.
My son is Jewish.
I don't mind people saying Merry Christmas to me.
I like calling it a Christmas tree.
It's a Christmas holiday.
It's a Christian holiday.
It's not a holiday holiday.
It's not an atheist holiday.
It's a Christian holiday.
Yeah, it's not a holiday holiday.
But it's a holiday that atheists can celebrate.
You've said holiday a hundred times and you're saying it's not a holiday.
Absolutely, and Jews can celebrate it.
Everybody can have a good time.
Everybody can have a good time.
Because it's a holiday holiday.
A holiday marking the birth of a man, or we'll call him the son of God, who said, peace on earth and on earth goodwill to men.
And what can possibly be wrong with celebrating the ideas of a person who said something like that?
Let me just take it one step further and then I'm going to ask you the why on it.
Jesus of Nazareth was the most influential human being who has ever lived.
That's beyond any doubt, all right?
I don't doubt it.
Okay, so of course you would honor a person like that because what Jesus stood for was peace.
Turn the other cheek, all of that.
Forgiveness, forgiveness.
Yeah, all the stuff that we don't actually do or believe in ever, spouse.
But as they say in California, it's all good.
It's all good.
But it isn't all good.
Do you say that, honey?
Because now we have the secular progressives trying to remove Christmas, the word, the displays, even the federal holiday.
They'd love to have it rescinded.
From the public arena.
Why?
Why?
Well, Bob Dylan said it best.
There are a lot of people that have knives and forks, they have nothing on their plate, and they've got to cut something.
There are a lot of angry, bitter people out there, they've got to attack something, so they attack Christmas.
They're not, I don't consider them well in the head.
God bless them.
And they probably wouldn't like my saying that about them.
God bless them.
But there's nothing wrong with celebrating Merry Christmas.
There's nothing wrong with having this be the predominant holiday in a predominantly Christian country.
There's nothing at all wrong with admiring the precepts of Jesus Christ.
There's nothing at all wrong with having Christmas trees.
There's nothing at all wrong with having Christmas.
Nobody's being forced to bow down.
He stopped even for, "There's nothing wrong with that." Worship anybody, nobody's being forced to do anything against his will.
You drive by a crash, how are you possibly harmed by that?
How can you possibly be harmed by that?
By the way, the imagery that was showing during that was the Christmas tree in the White House.
Yeah, in a country full of Christians.
In the place where the King of America lives.
That's where we also have a Christmas tree, even when it's a Democratic president.
So like, what the fuck are you talking about?
Anyway, seeing how bad he sounded 11 years ago makes me think he's actually, now that I think about it, the Aunt Jemima video, he looks better than I would think.
And then here we come to our last video from 2012.
It's O'Reilly again, of course.
War on Christmas is very, very real.
And if you ask me, in addition to some grouchy, you know, misanthropic, heathen atheists, it has to do with, at the root of it, it has to do with two things, abortion and the gay rights agenda, because Christianity is against those things.
And it's subtle, but that's what it is.
That's why it's so pronounced in recent years, in my opinion.
100% agree.
I absolutely agree 100% that it's the diminishment of Christianity is the target and Christmas is the vehicle because the secularists know their opposition to their agenda.
Legalized drugs is in that as well.
And why isn't there a war on, like, Easter?
You know?
Weird.
Or do they do that?
Maybe they do.
I don't know.
It's not so much a church, it's a mindset.
- And why isn't there a war on like Easter, you know?
- Yeah, yeah.
- Weird.
Or do they do that?
Maybe they do, I don't know.
- Nothing I've heard about.
- God, this, these people.
- Set.
Do you agree with that gut fella or is this way over your head? - That's a perfect comedic cut.
Yeah.
I think we're gonna have to call it there for the first part of our Hardcore History on the War on Christmas.
The war on Christmas.
The ups, the downs, the battles.
The Ken Burns.
Yeah, the Ken Burns.
We've covered up into the year 2012 in the war.
And as you know, there are a great many casualties to come.
Some of the darkest moments.
Bloodiest battles of the war.
We've recolorized the footage.
War on Christmas in color.
But not red and green, because those were fucking banned!
They were banned!
And if I see you using red or green... Oh my gosh, no-cos.
This is the world of no-cos.
Oh wow, yeah.
Daryl Dash crossover.
We are so dedicated to the war on Christmas that we had a son who can't really see red and green, okay?
That's how, so ask yourselves, Wokists, are you as dedicated as we are?
That's why we were made Colonel.
Yep.
Yeah, exactly.
Us together.
We're Colonel Smith.
We share a position.
Hi, we're Colonel.
So we've got some great stuff for you.
Not only do we have a second part in which we're going to discuss the latter years up until the present of some of the best War on Christmas current affairs.
Yeah, we also had a guest comedian come on, an expert, whose name is Tom Curry, for even more hilarious O'Reilly and others bashing.
Another O'Reilly video that explains what he thinks the mentality of us War on Christmas soldiers is.
So that is a tremendous amount of fun.
We had a great time.
You know, it's sort of like gallows humor when we're in the trenches of the war.
Just laughing it up.
It's some of the darkest times when you can laugh the most on The War of Christmas.
No, that was a ton of fun.
That'll be on Patreon.com slash WhereThere'sWoke.
We also got one of the most ridiculous War on Christmas stories with Tom, too.
Oh, it's the best.
Yeah, so fun.
So, that's what you have to look forward to.
Next time on WhereThere'sWoke, the second half of the war on Christmas.
Or we need like the, who's the normal, uh, Ken Burns voice is normally like a deep like male voice actually.
Also, like, can we get Laura Linney for this?
Cause I would be like into that.
Yeah.
I'm Laura Linney.
And this is The Lauren Christmas.
Fuck Santa Claus.
Yeah.
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