| Time | Text |
|---|---|
|
Tourne Dans La Vie
00:12:54
|
|
| Let's do it T. | |
| Cold cans of water instead of air conditioning. | |
| Windows down. Who needs air conditioning? | |
| It's a nice, fresh day. | |
| Alex, are you coming? Of course. | |
| Let's go! Bro, I was dreaming about being in this amazing car. | |
| Starts every time. Will it start, though? | |
| It's been sitting here for six months. | |
| Bailey, 50% of the time, it works every time. | |
| ♪ Tourner dans la vie de vide, tourner dans la vie de vide, tourner dans la vie de vide, me fait tourner dans la | |
| vie de vide, de vide, tourner, tourner dans la vie, tourner dans la vie de vide, me fait tourner. ♪ | |
| Moment of truth. | |
| First time. | |
| Oh my gosh. | |
| First keep works every time, baby. | |
| Alright, let's roll. Okay, one or two more of these. | |
| The no power steering gets me. | |
| forearm workout. I'm a tough guy. | |
| Rub on my grass a little bit. | |
| Nice. | |
| I'm a tough guy. | |
| I'm a tough guy. | |
| But I don't do no dance wheeling. | |
| Yeah! | |
| I can dig spappin' I'm ready | |
| I can dig spappin' But I can't dig that backstabbin' | |
| No brother get it ready That's the fact | |
| Get ready, mama! | |
| Mama Big Baby Hey! | |
| Let me hit him! Hit him, Fred! Hit him! | |
| Beep! Beep! | |
| Hey! Hey! Woo! | |
| Low! | |
| Low! | |
| What does the riding experience like? | |
| Awful! | |
| One. Everything. | |
| Clutch, the gearbox, the steering, everything. | |
| Everything about it is awful. But it's how it makes you feel. | |
| You know? The three-piece tailored suit isn't as comfortable as, say, sweatpants or jeans. | |
| However, when you're doing it, comfort isn't what you're thinking about. | |
| There's a fucking man in this lawn. | |
| I'm gonna make you a new man. | |
| Don't worry, I know which one's better. | |
| That probably has electric windows and a bunch of shit that you Americans like | |
| Heavy beat Let's race him. Ah, you know what? | |
| That would actually be a very good race. | |
| I don't know who would race. Oh, perfect. | |
| Straight away. Get his ass. | |
| Let's do it! Uh oh. | |
| Engine's losing power for some reason. We did it! We got it! | |
| We whooped his asses! | |
| F*** him! Death to America. | |
| Cold power to the Soviet Union. | |
| The lot is awake. | |
| What car did you drive here? | |
| Ferrari SF90. You didn't park it next to my lotta, did you? | |
| Why? Look, I like the Ferrari, and I like that people in the city know that our cars are out, but there's no point in fucking parking it next to something as cool as a lotta. | |
| You may as well have not taken it. | |
| Who's gonna see it? Nobody. | |
| He's got a point. What were you thinking? | |
| I challenge you to a non-alcoholic beer drink coffee. | |
| I will win. In competition, you put me in. | |
| There you will. I agree. | |
| You're definitely going to win. I still challenge you. | |
| You're welcome. Can we have 10 non-alcoholic beers, please? | |
| Okay. You'll drink one, then. | |
| Grow up. I'm not talking to Andrew for the rest of the day. | |
| I actually mean it. You're a thousand percent gonna kick my ass. | |
| You're the champ. What would Bailey do? | |
| I like that. I can't be Bailey. | |
| We're gonna be nice to everybody. Everyone is going to receive nothing but kindness, and we're not going to have a negative attitude towards anybody or anything. | |
| Get fucked, you're a loser. You're a dickhead and you're a loser. | |
| Love you, Andrew. I don't love you back. | |
| I hope you're having an amazing day. | |
| Here you go, buddy. Kill them with kindness. | |
| It's working. I refuse to let your dark aura affect my bright light. | |
| I've already punched you as hard as I can. | |
| You can snap your sternum. | |
| Yep. I would forgive you. | |
| Shit. I would do something that is unforgivable. | |
| You cannot forgive me for everything. | |
| I can forgive you. The more you play this forgiveness game, the worse I'll get. | |
| Cool. Alright, deal. | |
| Too slow! Alright, you got me. | |
| You can't forgive him for that. | |
| I'll be nice all the time. | |
| Truces starts coming places. I'll think about it. | |
| So for now I'm out, so you've got to be nice. | |
| No, it could be a lifelong commitment. | |
| We're all as a team. We're going to be a happy, nice team. | |
| But whenever anyone wants to go out, we all have to go. | |
| Say the words, I'll be Mr. | |
| Nice. Thank you. | |
| Deal? Nice! | |
| Nice! You're incredibly childish. | |
| Just grow up. Oh. | |
| Scared of winning, are you? | |
| Scared of kicking my ass in this competition. | |
| You know what else is going to happen, don't you? | |
| My chance of winning is zero. | |
| You're a thousand percent of the winner. | |
| I don't stand a chance. | |
| I'll have a glass, please. | |
| I'll have to lose with a glass. | |
| There is no way on God's green earth that I beat you. | |
| Admit it. I dare you. | |
| Say the words. Alright, now my turn to grin on as fast as I can. | |
| Shit. Too cold. | |
| Too bubbly. You win. | |
| What are we gonna do, winner? | |
| well winner how does that feel I'm not talking | |
| You're a service cup and you want them to bring you your food slowly and miss half the order and be annoying when they put it down on the table. | |
| Admit that. Admit you want it to take ages. | |
| Admit it. Admit what you are and do yourself from hiding the facts of the situation. | |
| You want to sit here all afternoon. | |
| This place blows. Everyone can see it except for you. | |
| Or perhaps you do see it, Tristan. | |
| Perhaps you saw it all along. Perhaps it was all part of your plan to come here and be mistreated so you can get a fucking boner under the table. | |
| Dipshit. Well done beating me in the drinking competition. | |
| Well done. You win. Congratulations. | |
| Your tone is borderline mean. | |
| Remember, we said we were going to be nice. | |
| I am being nice. He won. | |
| He's a real winner. Well done. | |
| Congratulations. You did fantastic. | |
| You really, you really won that competition. | |
| Good job. Daytime art. | |
| When none of us are hungry and none of us are drinking, we're gonna get there and stand on our table and order a fucking espresso and then 45 minutes later say let's go home. | |
| Don't cry, you'll be fine. | |
| And the other rest of the time, 29%, he just talks shit. | |
| And right now he's just talking shit. | |
| Nothing he said makes sense. | |
| It is your dream for them to forget my milk, for my coffee, to top off this terrible dinner service. | |
| It's your dream come true, isn't it? | |
| It's your fucking fantasy, and here we are. | |
| Your pants jizzing. | |
| And I'm with no milk for my coffee. | |
| Even though I explicitly not only asked for it, I also asked for the particular temperature, which should have been a pretty memorable request. | |
| You're lying. You're lying. | |
| Did you forget? | |
| No problem, Tristan. | |
| It's Tristan's dream for that to come true, isn't it, Tristan? | |
| I'm not talking to Andrew. | |
| Wake up. | |
| Back to the real world. | |
| Most of my cars are new, but this is my only classic. | |
| I like it. It's nice. Thank you very much, bro. | |
| You're welcome. Have a good one. | |
| Thank you. | |
| oh oh | |
| More radish jumps. | |
| It's a Poliwag! | |
| You're burning a beetle, T. I'm filming this. | |
| That was a good idea, T. Killing the beetle, but I have a better idea. | |
| I know how I'm gonna be able to pump roost to the moon. | |
| I care because I'm gonna get rich. | |
| Did you buy some of that? Of course. | |
| I told you I was, so of course I bought it. | |
| And here's what I did. I went and got some Top G Roost mugs made. | |
| And what I'm gonna... Is that why you bought me coffee? | |
| Maybe. I am gonna give this to Andrew though. | |
| And this is my master plan. When Andrew gets back home, I'm gonna hand him a cup of coffee. | |
| And if you film while I hand it to him, and we get the angle just right, and I see Roost on the cup, and him holding it, it's gonna go viral. | |
| And Roost is going to go through the moon. | |
| It's not a stupid plan. T, it's gonna work. | |
| Well, there he is. So hold this. | |
| It's not gonna work. | |
| All right, good luck. He sees me filming! | |
| How are you? You want a cup of coffee? | |
| I know you love coffee. Don't worry about tea. | |
| I know you want a cup of coffee. You're always drinking coffee. | |
| You have 30 coffees a day and you do not have enough coffee. | |
|
You Look Like You Need Coffee
00:02:28
|
|
| So please, why is it plain? | |
| Andrew, it's just coffee. | |
| There's no trick. It's just coffee. | |
| And you look like you need a coffee. | |
| I'm trying to be a good friend. I'm trying to give you a coffee. | |
| I'm trying to give you a coffee. | |
| Look, it's a Top G mug. I had it made just for you. | |
| I don't get your joke. What's your joke? | |
| There is no joke. It's coffee. Why are you acting suspicious? | |
| What's on the other side of the cup? | |
| You don't need to know. What's on the other side of the cup? | |
| Do you really want to see? Yes. | |
| Andrew, just take a sip. Bro. | |
| Andrew, just take a sip. | |
| Andrew! Andrew! | |
| I told you it wasn't going to work. | |
| Stupid plan. | |
| I think it's gonna work. | |
| Die! | |
| Die! | |
| How would you die? | |
| Beneath this mask there is more than flesh. | |
| Beneath this mask there is idea. | |
| And idea is how we recruit. | |
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| Everything changed. Being able to generate well over 40,000 US dollars. | |
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