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April 18, 2023 - Tate Speech - Andrew Tate
16:39
ENDLESS SHOPPING SPREE | Tate Confidential Ep 175
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Oh, Tristan, you can't...
To be fair though, I suppose you do look actually very very classy.
Nice champagne.
Whoa I wish I had like A very empty glass of water.
In my Adidas tracksuit.
What do you mean?
Correct. So clearly they're making a mistake somewhere.
somewhere down the line.
So where's your cousin?
Luke, it's a stone cold loser.
He thinks that you can land into London in December when it's Christmassy and not be instantly compelled to go and spend all your money shopping.
In fact, he goes, every time we go to London, all you do is shop and spend loads of money and buy cars and buy stuff.
I don't see the point.
He's like, you don't see the points of what you can do instead?
Because I might have a bath.
Fucking geek, bro.
How did you get a cousin who's such a fucking intolerable geek?
He can be biologically related to me.
He must be adopted into the family.
He's not my cousin. There's no universe where he has any DNA in common with me.
There's no way he's my cousin. In fact, I'm not sure we even descend from the same human ancestors in the African Rift Valley.
I think he's independently evolved.
As a nerd? Yeah.
He may be extraterrestrial.
Extraterrestrial nerd. ETN. His nerd levels are galactic.
I wonder if he goes to spend loads of money and then come back and call Luke names and threaten him and tell him he's a loser.
I wonder if he goes to spend loads of money and then come back and tell him he's a loser.
I wonder if he goes to spend loads of money and then come back and tell him he's a loser.
I like rain.
I like rain.
I pray for the sky like rain.
I pray for the wind like rain.
From a little youth, I tell myself I have a plan.
I want to be famous like Ninja Man.
I want big like Joe Bantan.
So everyday I build a single team song.
I don't like the journey big long, but I get up and burn.
I'm gross on the trunk.
When I get my first number one, I buy a house for my mother, man.
I'm in a gum truck.
So you're going to give up?
You don't have a girlfriend?
And go have freshness.
Nobody likes you. I'm putting an Apple Watch.
You don't want it? You want me an Apple Watch?
I have a patette. I have an AP. Why would I want an Apple Watch?
Yeah, but you can't. Let's check your emails.
I would rather shoot myself in the face and check my emails if I want you.
Why? I'd rather cut my hand off.
You're cutting your hand off me.
No, you're wearing AP. You're wearing Rolex.
I'm gonna wear it.
You're very welcome.
It's a coffee.
You wanna come for a £250 coffee?
Do you want coffee?
I think I'm gonna say no to that.
What are you gonna do?
Just flip that shit.
You must push it off the back here and what you do is...
What you fly, then you stay a virgin, and then what, you land and you're a geek?
Yeah, what do you do? So you do this?
Is that what happens? You stand on it like this, okay?
Check your phone. No women have messaged you.
Get off your skateboard.
Go home. Porn.
Video games. Cry.
And then skateboard again.
I think it's a cycle. That's why I can't skateboard.
Because the other sets are too hard for me.
No women on the phone. Jerking off.
Porn. Porn.
Video games. Because I can't do that.
I'm just not an actual skater.
Sorry bro. So what do you have to say to skaters?
Do I really need more enemies?
You know what I'm going to say to skaters?
I'm top G. I love everybody universally.
I just think with all the time you're investing in doing kickflips, you could perhaps, I don't know, learn to box, learn to fight, get rich.
I mean, but if you really want to do kickflips, do kickflips.
I'm full of love for everybody. I don't hate anyone.
I do not marginalize. I'm not bigoted in any form, even against skateboarders.
Even the virgins on skateboarders.
They're all my friends So kind I'm a free man, I'm a free man Top G, Nagbogati Yo Dre Wani Dandim Walla Romi Basler Top G Galibela, Phoebe, Tawaneh, Sipri Top G, Nagbogati We a dippin at the party Cobra, Galate, Masechiwami
Richard, Danny, and Riton Afilopami, Young Amasati Silly Fat Tone, Da Descent, Sadafami We do this every year and it's stupid.
What do you mean? It's stupid.
Do it every year. I stand to correct you.
We do not do this every year. We do this every time I come to London.
So it's multiple times a year. It's multiple times a year.
Multiple times a year. But it's complete nonsense.
Why? I did a little bit of shopping.
It's not a little bit of shopping.
This is probably literally hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of shopping.
It's stupid. Dora, mate.
Listen, he thinks it's stupid that I spent hundreds of thousands of pounds on shopping, but Luke does not understand that money is not real and I'm a master of ice.
I will admit, I don't remember.
There's more here! Yeah, of course there is!
I don't remember what most of this stuff is.
But at the time, I wanted it.
At the time, I wanted it.
Tristan? Loose complaining about me spending too much money.
Or what? What'd you buy? Bro!
All this shit. I can't remember.
Oh, you bought shit.
I bought shit.
This is all cigar paraphernalia and accessories.
Are you aware? Yeah, so that's about a thousand bucks.
Look at this. Look at this. Look at this.
Limited edition. Joker.
This is number 3 of 288.
$5,000.
$5,000 for a lighter.
Do you agree we need that lighter until he loses it?
But that's what I mean. Don't lose it.
No, no, no. I can't lose it.
Because I bought 6 other DuPont lighters.
So I can lose that first.
It's now number seven. These are special edition limits.
How much does that cost? Davidoff's is rose gold.
Oh, some money. It costs some money.
Luke, do you agree? This is stupid.
Guys, do you agree that he needs this $5,000 lighter until he loses it?
But that's what I mean. He doesn't need it.
Until he loses it. He's going to lose it.
Exactly. We know he's going to lose it.
Until he loses it, he needs it. Do you agree?
So do you admit that I could slice your face off with this if I wanted to?
Yes, I do. It's Christmas, Luke.
This isn't Christmassy.
This is Christmas. Who kicked out of the tree last time?
Now he's threatening to slice my face off.
I don't want an iPad. Apple's the devil.
It's brand new. It's yellow. We don't need it.
I bought it for you, Luke. Luke, I bought you an iPad.
Luke, you don't want an iPad? No, this is stupid.
What's your Christmas present? You don't want an iPad?
Why does Tristan keep cutting things?
It has a keyboard. Andrew, take your Christmas present.
Merry Christmas, Luke. I don't want them. Merry Christmas, Luke.
So I admit it. I broke my computer.
And I actually do need the iPad.
That I completely said that I didn't need.
And I'm going to go get it.
And I know he's gonna make me admit it.
Because I kept saying that fuck Apple and I don't need Apple, but I actually need the iPad.
I admit it. I'm a loser.
What do you admit? I need the iPad.
So you meant it. Yeah, you bought the iPads.
I don't need the iPad. I've got a fucking Linux gay mode XLGAY. That's what you said you had.
You said you had laptop GAY SEX mode.
I know. I know. And now you admit it.
I admit it. I need the Apple.
I need Apple. So don't you admit you have a cousin who just buys random things.
And it's extremely intelligent to do.
Yeah. Because it's true.
You buy complete random shit.
We're here. I know. You need an Apple Watch to go with it.
No, I don't. Are you sure?
I'm sure. So you admit it.
If I did need one, I'd know where to go.
Say I admit it. I admit it.
I admit it. I'm a loser and I need Apple.
An Apple One. Apple One!
Not only did I buy six iPads, I bought keyboards.
I only bought one keyboard for my six iPads because I knew in my brain that you'd end up needing a keyboard.
The other five wouldn't, but you would.
That's how smart I am, isn't it?
That's true. That's exactly why you only bought one keyboard.
It was for this exact moment.
Somehow you knew. Merry Christmas.
Merry Christmas. Thank you very much, friend.
What is it? It came out this year as the 50th anniversary of the French Importer.
Light to medium, a bit more tasteful than the usual light to medium guarded cigar.
Fantastic cigar. So it was designed for the French?
Yes. Good, so I'm going to take it off the French.
That makes me happy. Exactly what you're going to do.
Why is this a cigar in England?
I'm about to take it off them.
Of course, as England, we've whooped France's ass endlessly.
We always will. Except in football, unfortunately.
It's fine. Take their cigar and teach them a lesson.
Nice. What are you going to do about it?
I won't care. No.
You're French. He cares.
Right in front of your face.
I took a cigar which was designed for your people.
I robbed you. I robbed your national treasure.
Do you guys have any English cigars that are made for the English?
Yes, we are. Could I please have one, please?
Absolutely. Thank you very much.
You're welcome. I'm going to pay the price.
Shit. I'm not finished complaining about people who like options.
Because when you actually listen to these individuals, you realize they are exceptionally low IQ. Oh, I just love, I just love whales!
How the fuck can you love a whale?
Has a whale ever paid your rent?
Have you ever spoken to a whale?
It's a huge thing in the ocean.
It's never interacted with whatever.
Doesn't talk. Doesn't improve your life.
If you had cancer, it wouldn't even send you a card.
And you're sitting there going, I love whales.
Why? Why? Why do you love them?
Humans shouldn't ever even see whales.
I love my dog. My dog comes to me.
He cares about me.
We care about each other. How can you love a whale?
It doesn't make any sense.
Whales don't give a fuck about you.
Liking marine life is asinine.
The entire fucking ocean is filled with dumb shit.
Name something smart from the ocean.
Dolphins, supposedly.
If you're that smart, why can't you walk?
You're fucking swimming around like a brook.
Getting caught in tuna nets.
You're a genius. I'm a tuna.
You're not smart, you're fucking dumb.
At least on land there's fucking smart shit.
Like dogs can do tricks.
Fucking lame. Fish are stupids.
Fucking sea urchins.
They've got a face. They've just got a face, bro.
Whales, big and dumb.
Fuck that shit.
It's all trash. If animals could talk, I don't think, I think the animals in the ocean would be the most stupid of them all.
I swim all day.
What do you say? Swim.
Anything else? No.
Look at losers, bro.
You're big and giant and terrifying.
What do you eat? Tiny shrews.
Lame. Loser.
Anyone who likes the ocean's low IQ. Standing by that fact.
You can't actually like those.
It's Rice Krispie Marshmallow Squares.
You can't actually enjoy them.
Everyone enjoys them. No.
Tristan, now you're lying.
You can't. Can what?
This is stupid. Why is it stupid?
It's Christmas. You guys can't enjoy...
I know it's Christmas, but that doesn't mean you need to eat Rice Krispies Square.
That doesn't mean you enjoy Rice Krispies Square.
It does. It surely must be a joke.
I don't know how to suck them on right now.
No, you're not. I'm going to become a fat loser like you.
If you have the choice of eating Rice Krispies Square or fighting me, fair enough, which ones you choose?
Well, I choose the Rice Krispies Square.
That's your choice. I mean, I guess they might be good.
You can't mean it.
I'm going to become a beekeeper.
So Tristan's been saying this for the past, let's say, I don't know, five minutes.
Five minutes? This is my life's dream.
It's not. It's the first I've ever heard it.
As everyone on the internet who knows me will know that I've been talking about becoming a beekeeper for the last decade.
That's not true at all. No, Tristan, the internet will prove that you're alive.
So when we're supposed to fly places and do fun things, we can't go because Tristan has to stay home and look after the bees.
Yeah, but that's stupid. And the garden will be full of loads of bees.
That's what I mean. That'd be horrible.
You need a helper beekeeper.
I might help you. You're going to help me?
No, we don't need... What if I get bees and you get bees and they end up bee-thing?
We don't need bee wars in the gardens.
How about we convert Luke's room into a bee cave?
No. He can still sleep in it.
He can have his bed. Luke, we're not kicking you out.
You can have your bed. No, but you're going to have to make it full of bees.
There will be some bees. But you're the beekeepers.
Why don't you do that with your rooms?
No, no, no. I've got to be separate from the bees to assert my dominance, so they know I'm not just one of the drones.
I'm going to start a bee colony, and it's going to be better than your bee colony, and they're going to kill all of your bees.
This is some brand new idea that's never been heard before.
And the battlefield is easy. Exactly.
No more supercars, no more private jets, no more thing.
We have to stay home, look after the bees, bee wars.
No, no bee wars.
We don't need bee wars.
Bee wars in the garden.
Wouldn't that ruin summer? Why don't you bee quiet?
New pitch Luke's room scorpion then. This is stupid.
I don't know.
Come on, boy.
Oh, look, there's booze. Free booze.
We don't need booze. What do you mean?
Merry Christmas, Luke. No one likes booze.
We have a car do need booze.
No, we don't. Good will to all men.
Good will to all men. I agree with that, but we don't need booze.
This is our Christmas celebration. No, I'm ruining it.
A little Christmas chocolate? I bet you don't have one.
Okay, everybody who does not have a religious affiliation that stops them drinking should drink.
Do we agree, Andrew? Agree.
I 100% was coming.
So here's our cancellation words.
I knew it was coming.
I absolutely and utterly knew it was coming because of how orchestrated it was.
The only thing, and I'll state this at the beginning, the only reason I'm upset by being cancelled is because I've expired one of my lives.
Because first you get cancelled. Controversial influencer Andrew Tate has been banned from Facebook and Instagram.
The cancelling of influencer Andrew Tate.
Then they make up a reason to put you in jail.
The Matrix has attacked me.
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