Tate Speech - Andrew Tate - ENDLESS SHOPPING SPREE  | Tate Confidential Ep 175
Aired: 2023-04-18
Duration: 16:39


=== Spending Spree Secrets (05:54) ===

[00:00:03]  Oh, Tristan, you can't...
[00:00:04]  To be fair though, I suppose you do look actually very very classy.
[00:00:33]  Nice champagne.
[00:00:36]  Whoa I wish I had like A very empty glass of water.
[00:00:45]  In my Adidas tracksuit.
[00:00:49]  What do you mean?
[00:00:58]  Correct. So clearly they're making a mistake somewhere.
[00:01:07]  somewhere down the line.
[00:01:09]  So where's your cousin?
[00:01:15]  Luke, it's a stone cold loser.
[00:01:16]  He thinks that you can land into London in December when it's Christmassy and not be instantly compelled to go and spend all your money shopping.
[00:01:23]  In fact, he goes, every time we go to London, all you do is shop and spend loads of money and buy cars and buy stuff.
[00:01:29]  I don't see the point.
[00:01:31]  He's like, you don't see the points of what you can do instead?
[00:01:33]  Because I might have a bath.
[00:01:36]  Fucking geek, bro.
[00:01:38]  How did you get a cousin who's such a fucking intolerable geek?
[00:01:41]  He can be biologically related to me.
[00:01:43]  He must be adopted into the family.
[00:01:45]  He's not my cousin. There's no universe where he has any DNA in common with me.
[00:01:48]  There's no way he's my cousin. In fact, I'm not sure we even descend from the same human ancestors in the African Rift Valley.
[00:01:54]  I think he's independently evolved.
[00:01:56]  As a nerd? Yeah.
[00:01:58]  He may be extraterrestrial.
[00:02:00]  Extraterrestrial nerd. ETN. His nerd levels are galactic.
[00:02:07]  I wonder if he goes to spend loads of money and then come back and call Luke names and threaten him and tell him he's a loser.
[00:02:11]  I wonder if he goes to spend loads of money and then come back and tell him he's a loser.
[00:02:15]  I wonder if he goes to spend loads of money and then come back and tell him he's a loser.
[00:02:20]  I like rain.
[00:02:22]  I like rain.
[00:02:25]  I pray for the sky like rain.
[00:02:27]  I pray for the wind like rain.
[00:02:29]  From a little youth, I tell myself I have a plan.
[00:02:32]  I want to be famous like Ninja Man.
[00:02:34]  I want big like Joe Bantan.
[00:02:36]  So everyday I build a single team song.
[00:02:39]  I don't like the journey big long, but I get up and burn.
[00:02:42]  I'm gross on the trunk.
[00:02:44]  When I get my first number one, I buy a house for my mother, man.
[00:02:48]  I'm in a gum truck.
[00:02:50]  So you're going to give up?
[00:02:52]  You don't have a girlfriend?
[00:02:54]  And go have freshness.
[00:02:57]  Nobody likes you. I'm putting an Apple Watch.
[00:02:59]  You don't want it? You want me an Apple Watch?
[00:03:02]  I have a patette. I have an AP. Why would I want an Apple Watch?
[00:03:05]  Yeah, but you can't. Let's check your emails.
[00:03:09]  I would rather shoot myself in the face and check my emails if I want you.
[00:03:12]  Why? I'd rather cut my hand off.
[00:03:16]  You're cutting your hand off me.
[00:03:18]  No, you're wearing AP. You're wearing Rolex.
[00:03:19]  I'm gonna wear it.
[00:03:21]  You're very welcome.
[00:03:28]  It's a coffee.
[00:03:29]  You wanna come for a £250 coffee?
[00:03:31]  Do you want coffee?
[00:03:32]  I think I'm gonna say no to that.
[00:03:34]  What are you gonna do?
[00:04:03]  Just flip that shit.
[00:04:05]  You must push it off the back here and what you do is...
[00:04:10]  What you fly, then you stay a virgin, and then what, you land and you're a geek?
[00:04:13]  Yeah, what do you do? So you do this?
[00:04:14]  Is that what happens? You stand on it like this, okay?
[00:04:18]  Check your phone. No women have messaged you.
[00:04:20]  Get off your skateboard.
[00:04:22]  Go home. Porn.
[00:04:23]  Video games. Cry.
[00:04:25]  And then skateboard again.
[00:04:27]  I think it's a cycle. That's why I can't skateboard.
[00:04:29]  Because the other sets are too hard for me.
[00:04:31]  No women on the phone. Jerking off.
[00:04:33]  Porn. Porn.
[00:04:35]  Video games. Because I can't do that.
[00:04:37]  I'm just not an actual skater.
[00:04:38]  Sorry bro. So what do you have to say to skaters?
[00:04:43]  Do I really need more enemies?
[00:04:44]  You know what I'm going to say to skaters?
[00:04:46]  I'm top G. I love everybody universally.
[00:04:48]  I just think with all the time you're investing in doing kickflips, you could perhaps, I don't know, learn to box, learn to fight, get rich.
[00:04:55]  I mean, but if you really want to do kickflips, do kickflips.
[00:04:57]  I'm full of love for everybody. I don't hate anyone.
[00:05:00]  I do not marginalize. I'm not bigoted in any form, even against skateboarders.
[00:05:04]  Even the virgins on skateboarders.
[00:05:06]  They're all my friends So kind I'm a free man, I'm a free man Top G, Nagbogati Yo Dre Wani Dandim Walla Romi Basler Top G Galibela, Phoebe, Tawaneh, Sipri Top G, Nagbogati We a dippin at the party Cobra, Galate, Masechiwami
[00:05:35]  Richard, Danny, and Riton Afilopami, Young Amasati Silly Fat Tone, Da Descent, Sadafami We do this every year and it's stupid.
[00:05:43]  What do you mean? It's stupid.
[00:05:44]  Do it every year. I stand to correct you.
[00:05:49]  We do not do this every year. We do this every time I come to London.
[00:05:53]  So it's multiple times a year. It's multiple times a year.
[00:05:55]  Multiple times a year. But it's complete nonsense.

=== Why We Keep Buying iPads (03:42) ===

[00:05:57]  Why? I did a little bit of shopping.
[00:05:59]  It's not a little bit of shopping.
[00:06:01]  This is probably literally hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of shopping.
[00:06:04]  It's stupid. Dora, mate.
[00:06:08]  Listen, he thinks it's stupid that I spent hundreds of thousands of pounds on shopping, but Luke does not understand that money is not real and I'm a master of ice.
[00:06:14]  I will admit, I don't remember.
[00:06:15]  There's more here! Yeah, of course there is!
[00:06:19]  I don't remember what most of this stuff is.
[00:06:20]  But at the time, I wanted it.
[00:06:22]  At the time, I wanted it.
[00:06:24]  Tristan? Loose complaining about me spending too much money.
[00:06:28]  Or what? What'd you buy? Bro!
[00:06:30]  All this shit. I can't remember.
[00:06:31]  Oh, you bought shit.
[00:06:33]  I bought shit.
[00:06:36]  This is all cigar paraphernalia and accessories.
[00:06:43]  Are you aware? Yeah, so that's about a thousand bucks.
[00:06:45]  Look at this. Look at this. Look at this.
[00:06:48]  Limited edition. Joker.
[00:06:51]  This is number 3 of 288.
[00:06:54]  $5,000.
[00:06:56]  $5,000 for a lighter.
[00:06:58]  Do you agree we need that lighter until he loses it?
[00:07:00]  But that's what I mean. Don't lose it.
[00:07:01]  No, no, no. I can't lose it.
[00:07:03]  Because I bought 6 other DuPont lighters.
[00:07:07]  So I can lose that first.
[00:07:09]  It's now number seven. These are special edition limits.
[00:07:11]  How much does that cost? Davidoff's is rose gold.
[00:07:14]  Oh, some money. It costs some money.
[00:07:16]  Luke, do you agree? This is stupid.
[00:07:18]  Guys, do you agree that he needs this $5,000 lighter until he loses it?
[00:07:22]  But that's what I mean. He doesn't need it.
[00:07:24]  Until he loses it. He's going to lose it.
[00:07:26]  Exactly. We know he's going to lose it.
[00:07:27]  Until he loses it, he needs it. Do you agree?
[00:07:28]  So do you admit that I could slice your face off with this if I wanted to?
[00:07:32]  Yes, I do. It's Christmas, Luke.
[00:07:35]  This isn't Christmassy.
[00:07:36]  This is Christmas. Who kicked out of the tree last time?
[00:07:39]  Now he's threatening to slice my face off.
[00:07:40]  I don't want an iPad. Apple's the devil.
[00:07:42]  It's brand new. It's yellow. We don't need it.
[00:07:45]  I bought it for you, Luke. Luke, I bought you an iPad.
[00:07:48]  Luke, you don't want an iPad? No, this is stupid.
[00:07:50]  What's your Christmas present? You don't want an iPad?
[00:07:52]  Why does Tristan keep cutting things?
[00:07:53]  It has a keyboard. Andrew, take your Christmas present.
[00:07:56]  Merry Christmas, Luke. I don't want them. Merry Christmas, Luke.
[00:07:59]  So I admit it. I broke my computer.
[00:08:03]  And I actually do need the iPad.
[00:08:05]  That I completely said that I didn't need.
[00:08:07]  And I'm going to go get it.
[00:08:09]  And I know he's gonna make me admit it.
[00:08:11]  Because I kept saying that fuck Apple and I don't need Apple, but I actually need the iPad.
[00:08:16]  I admit it. I'm a loser.
[00:08:25]  What do you admit? I need the iPad.
[00:08:27]  So you meant it. Yeah, you bought the iPads.
[00:08:29]  I don't need the iPad. I've got a fucking Linux gay mode XLGAY. That's what you said you had.
[00:08:37]  You said you had laptop GAY SEX mode.
[00:08:40]  I know. I know. And now you admit it.
[00:08:42]  I admit it. I need the Apple.
[00:08:45]  I need Apple. So don't you admit you have a cousin who just buys random things.
[00:08:48]  And it's extremely intelligent to do.
[00:08:50]  Yeah. Because it's true.
[00:08:51]  You buy complete random shit.
[00:08:55]  We're here. I know. You need an Apple Watch to go with it.
[00:08:58]  No, I don't. Are you sure?
[00:08:59]  I'm sure. So you admit it.
[00:09:01]  If I did need one, I'd know where to go.
[00:09:03]  Say I admit it. I admit it.
[00:09:04]  I admit it. I'm a loser and I need Apple.
[00:09:07]  An Apple One. Apple One!
[00:09:08]  Not only did I buy six iPads, I bought keyboards.
[00:09:10]  I only bought one keyboard for my six iPads because I knew in my brain that you'd end up needing a keyboard.
[00:09:15]  The other five wouldn't, but you would.
[00:09:17]  That's how smart I am, isn't it?
[00:09:19]  That's true. That's exactly why you only bought one keyboard.
[00:09:22]  It was for this exact moment.
[00:09:23]  Somehow you knew. Merry Christmas.
[00:09:25]  Merry Christmas. Thank you very much, friend.
[00:09:29]  What is it? It came out this year as the 50th anniversary of the French Importer.

=== Good Will Without Booze (06:59) ===

[00:09:40]  Light to medium, a bit more tasteful than the usual light to medium guarded cigar.
[00:09:46]  Fantastic cigar. So it was designed for the French?
[00:09:49]  Yes. Good, so I'm going to take it off the French.
[00:09:52]  That makes me happy. Exactly what you're going to do.
[00:09:55]  Why is this a cigar in England?
[00:09:56]  I'm about to take it off them.
[00:09:58]  Of course, as England, we've whooped France's ass endlessly.
[00:10:00]  We always will. Except in football, unfortunately.
[00:10:04]  It's fine. Take their cigar and teach them a lesson.
[00:10:07]  Nice. What are you going to do about it?
[00:10:13]  I won't care. No.
[00:10:15]  You're French. He cares.
[00:10:16]  Right in front of your face.
[00:10:18]  I took a cigar which was designed for your people.
[00:10:20]  I robbed you. I robbed your national treasure.
[00:10:23]  Do you guys have any English cigars that are made for the English?
[00:10:25]  Yes, we are. Could I please have one, please?
[00:10:27]  Absolutely. Thank you very much.
[00:10:28]  You're welcome. I'm going to pay the price.
[00:10:33]  Shit. I'm not finished complaining about people who like options.
[00:10:41]  Because when you actually listen to these individuals, you realize they are exceptionally low IQ. Oh, I just love, I just love whales!
[00:10:50]  How the fuck can you love a whale?
[00:10:52]  Has a whale ever paid your rent?
[00:10:54]  Have you ever spoken to a whale?
[00:10:56]  It's a huge thing in the ocean.
[00:10:58]  It's never interacted with whatever.
[00:11:00]  Doesn't talk. Doesn't improve your life.
[00:11:02]  If you had cancer, it wouldn't even send you a card.
[00:11:04]  And you're sitting there going, I love whales.
[00:11:06]  Why? Why? Why do you love them?
[00:11:09]  Humans shouldn't ever even see whales.
[00:11:11]  I love my dog. My dog comes to me.
[00:11:14]  He cares about me.
[00:11:15]  We care about each other. How can you love a whale?
[00:11:18]  It doesn't make any sense.
[00:11:20]  Whales don't give a fuck about you.
[00:11:23]  Liking marine life is asinine.
[00:11:25]  The entire fucking ocean is filled with dumb shit.
[00:11:29]  Name something smart from the ocean.
[00:11:31]  Dolphins, supposedly.
[00:11:32]  If you're that smart, why can't you walk?
[00:11:35]  You're fucking swimming around like a brook.
[00:11:36]  Getting caught in tuna nets.
[00:11:38]  You're a genius. I'm a tuna.
[00:11:40]  You're not smart, you're fucking dumb.
[00:11:42]  At least on land there's fucking smart shit.
[00:11:45]  Like dogs can do tricks.
[00:11:48]  Fucking lame. Fish are stupids.
[00:11:51]  Fucking sea urchins.
[00:11:52]  They've got a face. They've just got a face, bro.
[00:11:56]  Whales, big and dumb.
[00:11:58]  Fuck that shit.
[00:12:00]  It's all trash. If animals could talk, I don't think, I think the animals in the ocean would be the most stupid of them all.
[00:12:08]  I swim all day.
[00:12:09]  What do you say? Swim.
[00:12:11]  Anything else? No.
[00:12:14]  Look at losers, bro.
[00:12:15]  You're big and giant and terrifying.
[00:12:16]  What do you eat? Tiny shrews.
[00:12:19]  Lame. Loser.
[00:12:21]  Anyone who likes the ocean's low IQ. Standing by that fact.
[00:12:29]  You can't actually like those.
[00:12:33]  It's Rice Krispie Marshmallow Squares.
[00:12:36]  You can't actually enjoy them.
[00:12:38]  Everyone enjoys them. No.
[00:12:40]  Tristan, now you're lying.
[00:12:41]  You can't. Can what?
[00:12:46]  This is stupid. Why is it stupid?
[00:12:48]  It's Christmas. You guys can't enjoy...
[00:12:49]  I know it's Christmas, but that doesn't mean you need to eat Rice Krispies Square.
[00:12:52]  That doesn't mean you enjoy Rice Krispies Square.
[00:12:54]  It does. It surely must be a joke.
[00:12:55]  I don't know how to suck them on right now.
[00:12:58]  No, you're not. I'm going to become a fat loser like you.
[00:13:02]  If you have the choice of eating Rice Krispies Square or fighting me, fair enough, which ones you choose?
[00:13:06]  Well, I choose the Rice Krispies Square.
[00:13:07]  That's your choice. I mean, I guess they might be good.
[00:13:16]  You can't mean it.
[00:13:18]  I'm going to become a beekeeper.
[00:13:20]  So Tristan's been saying this for the past, let's say, I don't know, five minutes.
[00:13:25]  Five minutes? This is my life's dream.
[00:13:27]  It's not. It's the first I've ever heard it.
[00:13:29]  As everyone on the internet who knows me will know that I've been talking about becoming a beekeeper for the last decade.
[00:13:35]  That's not true at all. No, Tristan, the internet will prove that you're alive.
[00:13:38]  So when we're supposed to fly places and do fun things, we can't go because Tristan has to stay home and look after the bees.
[00:13:42]  Yeah, but that's stupid. And the garden will be full of loads of bees.
[00:13:45]  That's what I mean. That'd be horrible.
[00:13:47]  You need a helper beekeeper.
[00:13:48]  I might help you. You're going to help me?
[00:13:50]  No, we don't need... What if I get bees and you get bees and they end up bee-thing?
[00:13:55]  We don't need bee wars in the gardens.
[00:13:57]  How about we convert Luke's room into a bee cave?
[00:14:01]  No. He can still sleep in it.
[00:14:03]  He can have his bed. Luke, we're not kicking you out.
[00:14:04]  You can have your bed. No, but you're going to have to make it full of bees.
[00:14:07]  There will be some bees. But you're the beekeepers.
[00:14:09]  Why don't you do that with your rooms?
[00:14:11]  No, no, no. I've got to be separate from the bees to assert my dominance, so they know I'm not just one of the drones.
[00:14:17]  I'm going to start a bee colony, and it's going to be better than your bee colony, and they're going to kill all of your bees.
[00:14:21]  This is some brand new idea that's never been heard before.
[00:14:23]  And the battlefield is easy. Exactly.
[00:14:26]  No more supercars, no more private jets, no more thing.
[00:14:28]  We have to stay home, look after the bees, bee wars.
[00:14:30]  No, no bee wars.
[00:14:32]  We don't need bee wars.
[00:14:34]  Bee wars in the garden.
[00:14:36]  Wouldn't that ruin summer? Why don't you bee quiet?
[00:14:39]  New pitch Luke's room scorpion then. This is stupid.
[00:14:51]  I don't know.
[00:15:27]  Come on, boy.
[00:15:29]  Oh, look, there's booze. Free booze.
[00:15:31]  We don't need booze. What do you mean?
[00:15:34]  Merry Christmas, Luke. No one likes booze.
[00:15:35]  We have a car do need booze.
[00:15:38]  No, we don't. Good will to all men.
[00:15:41]  Good will to all men. I agree with that, but we don't need booze.
[00:15:44]  This is our Christmas celebration. No, I'm ruining it.
[00:15:46]  A little Christmas chocolate? I bet you don't have one.
[00:15:50]  Okay, everybody who does not have a religious affiliation that stops them drinking should drink.
[00:15:55]  Do we agree, Andrew? Agree.
[00:15:57]  I 100% was coming.
[00:16:15]  So here's our cancellation words.
[00:16:17]  I knew it was coming.
[00:16:18]  I absolutely and utterly knew it was coming because of how orchestrated it was.
[00:16:21]  The only thing, and I'll state this at the beginning, the only reason I'm upset by being cancelled is because I've expired one of my lives.
[00:16:26]  Because first you get cancelled. Controversial influencer Andrew Tate has been banned from Facebook and Instagram.
[00:16:33]  The cancelling of influencer Andrew Tate.
[00:16:36]  Then they make up a reason to put you in jail.
[00:16:38]  The Matrix has attacked me.